# A Question For The Ffa's



## jason'sgottenfat (Jan 7, 2007)

I Have A Question,....as I Am Looking For A Good Woman Myself,....if You Were Interested In A Chubby Guy That Caught Your Eye,....what Would You Do To Seduce Him? What Would You Do With Him?
Pudgy Jason


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## Mercedes (Jan 7, 2007)

That's tricky. I mean I'm soooo shy I'd not be able to do anything, except move closer and possibly make eye contact so maybe HE'D notice me and do something!

It'd take a very confident BHM for it to work...


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## kattylee (Jan 7, 2007)

I'm not single, but hypothetically if I was....

If I was in a bar, and saw a cute bigger guy I would definately go up to him and start a conversation. I will have normally had a few drinks so conversation shouldn't be too hard to come by! My tactic is generally to move my group of friends over to close where they are siiting, close enough to catch the guys eye. Then I would give him a friendly smile, and if he looked receptive, I might go over and strike up a conversation about, say, the music that was playing in the bar etc, and see where it went from there! If we got on well, I would have no hesitation in asking him to dinner (my date of choice as a FFA!) where I would drop hints about the fact that I find guys with big appetites sexy etc....and see how things progressed!

Bear in mind that the above is really only based on my personal preference, for smaller to medium sized BHMs. Not that I don't find larger BHM's attractive, but I like the idea of plumping them up further, so if they start smaller, I guess I'd feel more of an achievement! I'd say my preferred start weight for a man would be between 220 - 300 and tall. Anyway, I'm going off topic!


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## SandyBoston (Jan 7, 2007)

Grab him by his tie, hair, head, or whatever was handy, throw him on the floor, and ride him like a cowboy. 

Or just crack a demure smile--it depends what kind of mood I'm in.


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## Tooz (Jan 7, 2007)

jason'sgottenfat said:


> I Have A Question,....as I Am Looking For A Good Woman Myself,....if You Were Interested In A Chubby Guy That Caught Your Eye,....what Would You Do To Seduce Him? What Would You Do With Him?
> Pudgy Jason



What a long title.


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## supersoup (Jan 7, 2007)

tooz said:


> What a long title.



get out of my brain.

i thought the same thing.


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## Tooz (Jan 7, 2007)

supersoup said:


> get out of my brain.
> 
> i thought the same thing.



<3 :batting:


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## Blondeegrldd (Jan 7, 2007)

Honestly, I'd have no reservations about coming on strong to a BHM who was giving me the right signals. I'd be up front, tell him I was attracted to him, tell him I wanted to kiss him, and wherever else it may lead. I'd also be as honest and sweet as can be to let him know he may advance toward me all he wants - that I wouldn't pull away.


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## AppreSheAte (Jan 7, 2007)

to wear a tee shirt saying something like,

Big Handsome Man Available

would an abbreviation work?

BHMA

or how about a catchey phrase?

Biggin lookin for love

Big guys have more fun, 
and enjoy eating more too!

Big guys like gals of all sizes

Well,...

Any other suggestions?


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## lemmink (Jan 9, 2007)

I'd run away and hide in the toilets and giggle stupidly.

No, srsly. That's totally my seduction technique.


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## Pinkbelly (Jan 9, 2007)

kattylee said:


> I'm not single, but hypothetically if I was....
> 
> If I was in a bar, and saw a cute bigger guy I would definately go up to him and start a conversation. I will have normally had a few drinks so conversation shouldn't be too hard to come by! My tactic is generally to move my group of friends over to close where they are siiting, close enough to catch the guys eye. Then I would give him a friendly smile, and if he looked receptive, I might go over and strike up a conversation about, say, the music that was playing in the bar etc, and see where it went from there! If we got on well, I would have no hesitation in asking him to dinner (my date of choice as a FFA!) where I would drop hints about the fact that I find guys with big appetites sexy etc....and see how things progressed!
> 
> Bear in mind that the above is really only based on my personal preference, for smaller to medium sized BHMs. Not that I don't find larger BHM's attractive, but I like the idea of plumping them up further, so if they start smaller, I guess I'd feel more of an achievement! I'd say my preferred start weight for a man would be between 220 - 300 and tall. Anyway, I'm going off topic!



yup, that'd totally work


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## Ms. Marvel (Jan 10, 2007)

My first reaction would be to make eye contact and stare him up and down, if he didn't get the hint, I'd go over and say "hi" Simple, but it works lol


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## butterflyblob (Jan 10, 2007)

lemmink said:


> I'd run away and hide in the toilets and giggle stupidly.
> 
> No, srsly. That's totally my seduction technique.



Hey, you stole my moves!

So sad, so sad.


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## Ivy (Jan 10, 2007)

I'd wait for him to say hi, and then have a conversation about nothing. During the conversation I'd be mean. I've found that this makes guys fall head over heels much faster than the whole nice and sweet girl thing. When you're nice and sweet you usually don't get a number outta the whole thing, and they lose interest real fast. When you're mean, it turns into a chase. And when they finally catch you, it will most likely end in some sweet, sweet lovin'.

hellz yea.


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## Big Ben SC (Jan 10, 2007)

Blondeegrldd said:


> Honestly, I'd have no reservations about coming on strong to a BHM who was giving me the right signals. I'd be up front, tell him I was attracted to him, tell him I wanted to kiss him, and wherever else it may lead. I'd also be as honest and sweet as can be to let him know he may advance toward me all he wants - that I wouldn't pull away.



OMG...I finally found the perfect woman! :smitten:


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## Allie Cat (Jan 11, 2007)

Ivy said:


> I'd wait for him to say hi, and then have a conversation about nothing. During the conversation I'd be mean. I've found that this makes guys fall head over heels much faster than the whole nice and sweet girl thing. When you're nice and sweet you usually don't get a number outta the whole thing, and they lose interest real fast. When you're mean, it turns into a chase. And when they finally catch you, it will most likely end in some sweet, sweet lovin'.
> 
> hellz yea.



I disagree. If a girl's mean to me I don't want anything to do with her...

=Divals


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## Melian (Jan 11, 2007)

I haven't been single in 1.5 years now, but here is my old strategy. It doesn't make a whole lot of sense, but it always worked, for some reason. Also, if I accidentally do something along these lines when I'm out now, the guys still respond, even if my bf is there!

So here it is:
1. Spot the target (observe him for a few minutes just to be sure he's not taken).
2. When he is alone, introduce yourself and DON'T try to justify why you are talking to him, ie. you're bored, you like the music, you like his gaping fleshwound, etc. Just say hi, and he'll usually pick a topic.
3. Disappear for a bit. This is critical; it gives him a moment to wonder what the hell just happened, and perhaps become curious.
4. Re-enter his field of view, but bring a friend and engage in conversation for at least 10 minutes. Give him ONE glance.
5. Lose the friend. Go to the bar alone, dance, go check on your coat, whatever. He will approach you now if he's interested, but he won't make any advances because he is still unsure if you were flirting earlier or just making conversation. 
6. Make your move. I'm not subtle, at this point. I'll get him to dance, or go right for the contact info. 

Yeah, it seems stupid....but I won't argue with success  
I think the basic principle is that most guys like a chase, but they also want you to initiate something.


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## growingman (Jan 12, 2007)

Ivy said:


> I'd wait for him to say hi, and then have a conversation about nothing. During the conversation I'd be mean. I've found that this makes guys fall head over heels much faster than the whole nice and sweet girl thing. When you're nice and sweet you usually don't get a number outta the whole thing, and they lose interest real fast. When you're mean, it turns into a chase. And when they finally catch you, it will most likely end in some sweet, sweet lovin'.
> 
> hellz yea.



Let me tell you, this is a terrible mistake. It would just make me think you were a jerk or had some kind of emotional problem. I would say Hasta la vista baby! It is better to show interest in something the guy is interested in, keep lots of eye contact, and a good sense of humor will take you a long way.


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## growingman (Jan 12, 2007)

Blondeegrldd said:


> Honestly, I'd have no reservations about coming on strong to a BHM who was giving me the right signals. I'd be up front, tell him I was attracted to him, tell him I wanted to kiss him, and wherever else it may lead. I'd also be as honest and sweet as can be to let him know he may advance toward me all he wants - that I wouldn't pull away.



This is a great way to go. Most big guys are rejected a lot and if they are showing you signals, it shows they have the interest in you and they are confident enough to deal well with your approach. My guess is you will have great success this way. Guys are pretty simple. Don't play hard to get or silly games. Be more direct and let them know what you like early in the relationship. You might find other guys by playing games, but you will get the guy you want by using this kind of approach.


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## Ivy (Jan 13, 2007)

growingman said:


> Let me tell you, this is a terrible mistake. It would just make me think you were a jerk or had some kind of emotional problem. I would say Hasta la vista baby! It is better to show interest in something the guy is interested in, keep lots of eye contact, and a good sense of humor will take you a long way.



um, i was joking. lolz.


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## Laina (Jan 14, 2007)

Ivy said:


> I'd wait for him to say hi, and then have a conversation about nothing. During the conversation I'd be mean. I've found that this makes guys fall head over heels much faster than the whole nice and sweet girl thing. When you're nice and sweet you usually don't get a number outta the whole thing, and they lose interest real fast. When you're mean, it turns into a chase. And when they finally catch you, it will most likely end in some sweet, sweet lovin'.
> 
> hellz yea.



I'm tellin' ya. Why Men Love Bitches was a best seller.


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## Obesus (Jan 14, 2007)

I am not sure that a women with mean character traits is exactly the thing that attracts, but I am quite sure that a strong and independent woman is extremily attractive to a lot of men if you carve away the usual social conditionings! Sometimes men are so poor at reading personality, signals and social cues that they wouldn't be able to tell the difference between a mean woman and a strong woman if it whacked them between the eyes. 

It is always a matter of time before a person's real character emerges from their initial presentation. It is just like a Psychologist doing an assessment. Someone who comes in for an hour might look relatively normal and high functioning, but if you knew them for five years, it would be obvious that they have a huge personality disorder. Short of administering a battery of personality tests to the prospective date, it makes sense to be a bit more guarded and go slowly until you know who you are really dealing with! I have a recent experience with a woman who presented very positively as a successful graduate student and admirer of fat men...let us just say that after a couple of months, issues emerged which would scare off Sigmund Freud himself! You just can't tell until you are with the person long enough....I know that I present like a kindly old roly poly Santa Claus sorta' fellow at first, but _things_ emerge after awhile and I just pray that the prospective date likes things on the, ahem, Gothic and cranky side!  :bow: 



Laina said:


> I'm tellin' ya. Why Men Love Bitches was a best seller.


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## moonvine (Jan 14, 2007)

I'd wait for him to approach me. I never ever approach men first.


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## lucyp (Jan 14, 2007)

jason'sgottenfat said:


> Would You Do To Seduce Him?Pudgy Jason



Hmm. It was more than a decade ago, before the internet, so I seduced him the old-fashioned way--- through the post. As in physical letters with stamps on them. I'm prolly the last generation to ever do that. =)


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## Laina (Jan 14, 2007)

While I haven't read the book (Yet! If I'm going to read 100 books in a year, I'm sure to run out of promising material eventually...), I'm fairly certain that the "bitches" in question were women of the outspoken and opinionated persuasion...as opposed to the 'traditional' forms of female manipulation. Bottom line, as far as I can tell from the reviews: men (shock!) prefer a woman to be outright bitchy, rather than backstabbing. Can't say I blame them.



Obesus said:


> I am not sure that a women with mean character traits is exactly the thing that attracts, but I am quite sure that a strong and independent woman is extremily attractive to a lot of men if you carve away the usual social conditionings! Sometimes men are so poor at reading personality, signals and social cues that they wouldn't be able to tell the difference between a mean woman and a strong woman if it whacked them between the eyes.
> 
> It is always a matter of time before a person's real character emerges from their initial presentation. It is just like a Psychologist doing an assessment. Someone who comes in for an hour might look relatively normal and high functioning, but if you knew them for five years, it would be obvious that they have a huge personality disorder. Short of administering a battery of personality tests to the prospective date, it makes sense to be a bit more guarded and go slowly until you know who you are really dealing with! I have a recent experience with a woman who presented very positively as a successful graduate student and admirer of fat men...let us just say that after a couple of months, issues emerged which would scare off Sigmund Freud himself! You just can't tell until you are with the person long enough....I know that I present like a kindly old roly poly Santa Claus sorta' fellow at first, but _things_ emerge after awhile and I just pray that the prospective date likes things on the, ahem, Gothic and cranky side!  :bow:


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## growingman (Jan 14, 2007)

Laina said:


> While I haven't read the book (Yet! If I'm going to read 100 books in a year, I'm sure to run out of promising material eventually...), I'm fairly certain that the "bitches" in question were women of the outspoken and opinionated persuasion...as opposed to the 'traditional' forms of female manipulation. Bottom line, as far as I can tell from the reviews: men (shock!) prefer a woman to be outright bitchy, rather than backstabbing. Can't say I blame them.




Both bitchy and backstabbing are both repulsive in my book, and have nothing to do with her expressing her opinion or thoughs. It is great to find a woman who has the confidence to express her opinion. A woman can be assertive, aggressive, even dominant while still being an attractive sexy and kind woman. Btw kind does not mean subserviant by any means. I find an intelligent kind sexy woman with a good sense of humor very seductive (especially if she likes guys with bigger appetites like me  ). Just as confidence is attractive in a man it is also attractive in a woman. 

Men are pretty simple, but most men worth their salt are not going to stay with a woman playing games. It is best to be yourself in the long run and do things to build your confidence and ability to communicate. Many men, even confident men, are not good at verbal communication and can use all the help you can give.


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## rabbitislove (Jan 14, 2007)

My strategy is to walk up with lots of confidence, smile and be my goofy self.
It works.
Today I got called "enchanting". *dreamy sigh*


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## Laina (Jan 15, 2007)

growingman said:


> Both bitchy and backstabbing are both repulsive in my book, and have nothing to do with her expressing her opinion or thoughs. It is great to find a woman who has the confidence to express her opinion. A woman can be assertive, aggressive, even dominant while still being an attractive sexy and kind woman. Btw kind does not mean subserviant by any means. I find an intelligent kind sexy woman with a good sense of humor very seductive (especially if she likes guys with bigger appetites like me  ). Just as confidence is attractive in a man it is also attractive in a woman.
> 
> Men are pretty simple, but most men worth their salt are not going to stay with a woman playing games. It is best to be yourself in the long run and do things to build your confidence and ability to communicate. Many men, even confident men, are not good at verbal communication and can use all the help you can give.



I really don't need a lecture, guys. It's a book I saw at B&N, not a lifestyle. Jeez.


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## Laina (Jan 15, 2007)

rabbitislove said:


> My strategy is to walk up with lots of confidence, smile and be my goofy self.
> It works.
> Today I got called "enchanting". *dreamy sigh*



Not fair! All I ever get called is "goofy".

*sigh* My name is Alaina, and I'm today's comic relief.


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