# How to Fake an Orgasm



## Hole (Feb 1, 2011)

http://www.videojug.com/film/how-to-fake-an-orgasm


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## FishCharming (Feb 1, 2011)

i usually just pretend that a spider just crawled up my butt, start singing Lady Gaga's Telephone (while replacing all the lyrics with Oh!) and smear low-fat banana cream pie yogurt all over the place (the key is to keep one in your pocket at all times so it stays warm). and voila, orgasm faked! gentleman, you are welcome


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## Hole (Feb 1, 2011)

FishCharming said:


> i usually just pretend that a spider just crawled up my butt, start singing Lady Gaga's Telephone (while replacing all the lyrics with Oh!) and smear low-fat banana cream pie yogurt all over the place (the key is to keep one in your pocket at all times so it stays warm). and voila, orgasm faked! gentleman, you are welcome



Ah, so that's what does it for you? I was hoping for Boston cream pie but that'll do. I tend to hide a long john underneath my armpit?

Anyone else have any fake orgasm stories? 

I know this is a fragile subject but if you push aside sensitivities and how damaging it can be to a relationship for a moment, you'll find it slightly amusing.


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## CastingPearls (Feb 1, 2011)

Cute video.

I refuse to fake one..... 'To thine own self be true'.


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## FishCharming (Feb 1, 2011)

Hole said:


> Ah, so that's what does it for you? I was hoping for Boston cream pie but that'll do. I tend to hide a long john underneath my armpit?
> 
> Anyone else have any fake orgasm stories?
> 
> I know this is a fragile subject but if you push aside sensitivities and how damaging it can be to a relationship for a moment, you'll find it slightly amusing.



i'd never fake with you, hole. or at least i'd get a flavor of yogurt you liked


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## Hozay J Garseeya (Feb 1, 2011)

I fake it with everyone the first time, so the next time, I look like a stud in comparison.


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## FishCharming (Feb 1, 2011)

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> I fake it with everyone the first time, so the next time, I look like a stud in comparison.



that is genius!!! you don't mind if i borrow that do you?


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## Oirish (Feb 1, 2011)

The only time I've ever faked one was after a rather long period of foreplay where the girl accidentally kneed me in the bald while we were rolling around. I played it off like nothing happened bit my balls REALLY hurt while we were having sex so I had to call it quits early.


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## Zowie (Feb 1, 2011)

Hahaha, I saw this long before I ever knew what an orgasm was. It kind of stuck. 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b0OeM6UUAoI


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## femaleseat (Feb 2, 2011)

OMG, this is hysterical


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## Melian (Feb 2, 2011)

CastingPearls said:


> Cute video.
> 
> I refuse to fake one..... 'To thine own self be true'.



Yep, I refuse too. Although, I've never had one either (junk is broken).


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## imfree (Feb 2, 2011)

Zowie said:


> Hahaha, I saw this long before I ever knew what an orgasm was. It kind of stuck.
> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b0OeM6UUAoI



Loved it!!! Women smiled, men had the look of fear on their faces, but the woman who wanted "what she's having" made me fall out of my chair!!!

Amazing scene, looks like those guys learned something.


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## CastingPearls (Feb 2, 2011)

That wasn't fear on their faces at all.


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## FishCharming (Feb 2, 2011)

Melian said:


> Yep, I refuse too. Although, *I've never had one either* (junk is broken).



me either! we should try to help each other out


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## Tad (Feb 2, 2011)

Hole said:


> http://www.videojug.com/film/how-to-fake-an-orgasm



I love how the women are always one step ahead of the men.....seems about right


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## penguin (Feb 2, 2011)

CastingPearls said:


> I refuse to fake one..... 'To thine own self be true'.



Me either. It's not easy for me (in fact, quite hard to get there, but it's fun trying), but faking it would only make the guy feel good and make me feel inadequate.


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## Mishty (Feb 2, 2011)

I faked once, because he was being mean to the lady garden and thought he was helping with his mean upper thrusts, I've enough real ones to fake one pretty well, only, it's no fun to fake it, but I suppose sometimes, ya gotta do what ya gotta do to make other people nut.


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## mikey787 (Feb 2, 2011)

Whats an orgasm ? :doh:


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## Buffetbelly (Feb 3, 2011)

I like to fill a condom with okra squeezings then fling it on the bed with a satisfied sigh. Pretty convincing!


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## JulieD (Feb 3, 2011)

I totally have...but seriously...after 5 hours of drunk effing...enough is enough


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## chicken legs (Feb 4, 2011)

I'm a horrible liar.


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## FemFAtail (Mar 20, 2011)

Buffetbelly said:


> I like to fill a condom with okra squeezings then fling it on the bed with a satisfied sigh. Pretty convincing!



You're too funny! And since when have you ever had to do that?!


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## Buffetbelly (Mar 20, 2011)

I do think female ejaculators have a more difficult time faking it!


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## Buffetbelly (Mar 20, 2011)

FemFAtail said:


> You're too funny! And since when have you ever had to do that?!


 
Well, not with YOU my love! My cup runneth over. And so does yours, by the way....


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## FemFAtail (Mar 20, 2011)

Buffetbelly said:


> I do think female ejaculators have a more difficult time faking it!



Ya think?!:happy:


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## SuperMishe (Mar 20, 2011)

FemFAtail said:


> Ya think?!:happy:



Not if they really have to pee! LOL!


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## FemFAtail (Mar 20, 2011)

Buffetbelly said:


> Well, not with YOU my love! My cup runneth over. And so does yours, by the way....



Oh, so true of you! And mine runneth over entirely because of your prowess. Hey...ya know, I think we are definitely on the wrong thread here!:blush:


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## FemFAtail (Mar 20, 2011)

Good point! Didn't think about that one!


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## FemFAtail (Mar 20, 2011)

SuperMishe said:


> Not if they really have to pee! LOL!



Although I think there is a definite difference in color, aroma and temperature between the two! Might not be able to actually pull it off that way.


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## CastingPearls (Mar 20, 2011)

FemFAtail said:


> Although I think there is a definite difference in color, aroma and temperature between the two! Might not be able to actually pull it off that way.


I agree. Other than being a liquid, female ejaculate isn't like urine at all.


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## BigBeautifulMe (Mar 21, 2011)

Faked when I was younger, but won't now. It does neither of us any good. I don't get what I need, and he doesn't get to learn what works for me.


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## CastingPearls (Mar 21, 2011)

Buffetbelly said:


> I do think female ejaculators have a more difficult time faking it!


Not every orgasm causes female ejaculation so technically one could be faked but to me that would be cheating myself.


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## analikesyourface (Mar 21, 2011)

I faked an orgasm the first and second time I had sex... but probably... two days after not having sex I was like *SUPER ORGASM!* it didn't hurt anymore ^__^


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## ManBeef (Mar 23, 2011)

I just induce a panic attack... that brings an asthma attack around. She feels so good that she took my breath away that she scratches my back after a few pumps of my inhaler


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