# Fat Hating Walmart Cashier



## largenlovely (Jan 10, 2009)

I'm not sure if this goes on this board or not..but...

Ok, so i go into walmart last night. I usually wait until way late at night so i don't have to deal with all the scooters being gone..there's not as many people so i don't have to deal with the crowds and long lines. It's just easier. The night crew there has gotten to know me. I've even made friends with some of them just from going in there late at night all the time. 

Some of the cashiers have probably been confused because i buy some of the clothes periodically, if i see something cute that i can squeeze into, that i'll use to take pictures in. These clothes don't fit me..they don't HAVE to, that's kind of the point lol. But...that wouldn't be anyone's business now would it. 

So i was going through the line. This new older cashier lady was scanning my stuff and while i was sort of distracted getting my money out, she says...."That wrap dress isn't for YOU is it? You checked the size right??" I was completely caught off guard and couldn't even believe she said it. I can't even remember what i said. She then tried to smooth it over and all i said was "Yeah" but i said it in such a shitty way that she could tell i was angry and she started stuttering and almost gave me back the wrong change. 

As i was riding out the door i knew i had to report this. I called the front end manager over, who thank GOD was a pretty chunky lady and told her what happened. She was really upset and promised she would take care of it. So i got home and told my dad and then HE called the front end manager and talked to her again. The front end manager said that she really let the lady have it and that the lady started crying and that she was being written up for it and it would be brought up at her evaluation. She also said that she'd already reported it to the assistant manager and they were going to talk to the day manager this morning. 

Which, i don't want the ladies job over it, but geeeeeeeze louise...getta f'ing clue right? I mean seriously, i could've been buying that outfit for anyone and JUST because i'm fat she felt it was ok to question me about it. Ugh it made me so mad. I'm still mad...but yeah, i just needed to vent.


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## Shosh (Jan 10, 2009)

Walmart sucks. First the poor man getting crushed to death before Christmas, and now this. The lady had no right to make a comment of that nature. Some people just cannot help themselves.
You were right to complain.


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## Red (Jan 10, 2009)

I've had this happen to me a couple of times. I was so stunned the first time, like you I can't really remember what I said. I just ended up mumbling something and wandering out of the shop. I'm a weird shape so when it comes to clothing, my size range varies dramatically so I can see why it was brought up but what I don't like is the way is makes you feel like a complete idiot. I try nearly everything on before I buy so I didn't appreciate the implication that I was clueless. I 'm like 'thanks I'm pretty sure I know how to dress myself...'. I'm always astounded by the brazeness of somepeople who were obviously not taught to think before they speak. Once I had a till lady at my Uni canteen have a pop at me (bearing in mind this lady saw me nearly every day). I was ordering a baked potato and just before she rang it up I also grabbed a fruit yoghurt bar thingie as I knew I was going to be in the studio till late. She said (in her loud and italian accent, infront of a queue of many),'oh..no no no, you don't need this..no no (whilst sort of waving it above her head), no no...do you really want it? (looking me up and down) Think about it first, no?' Now also bear in mind I studied at the London College of Fashion where, if you didn't have visible signs of a developing eating disorder you just weren't doing it right. I could have happily punched her on the nose, but again I was so dumbfounded I didn't really respond except say, 'ring it up for me please you have a queue of people waiting...' the scurried off. I am sort of determined now to have a snappier response something like this happens, some people need a lesson in manners. 

Sorry this happened to you, it's always pretty distressing. The main thing that annoys me is being upset that I'm upset if that makes sense? Annoyed that I let some idiot ruin my day. Hopefully the woman that served you will have a little think about it and not do it again to anyone else.


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## largenlovely (Jan 10, 2009)

Well i've never had any problems at Walmart really before...i'm really even shocked that it happened period. I bet she won't do it again lol



Susannah said:


> Walmart sucks. First the poor man getting crushed to death before Christmas, and now this. The lady had no right to make a comment of that nature. Some people just cannot help themselves.
> You were right to complain.


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## largenlovely (Jan 10, 2009)

Well the thing is, it's not their PLACE to bring it up even if they do think you're an idiot for buying something ya know? But you're right, it totally made me feel uncomfortable. She made me feel like i had to explain my purchases to some lady i didn't even know. Totally uncalled for. I'm glad she cried lol, but i really don't want her to be fired for it. 



Red said:


> I'm a weird shape so when it comes to clothing, my size range varies dramatically so I can see why it was brought up but what I don't like is the way is makes you feel like a complete idiot.



THIS is just horrible!!! Omg i'm sorry that *you* had to deal with that. I sooo wish you had reported her for this. That's just awful



Red said:


> She said (in her loud and italian accent, infront of a queue of many),'oh..no no no, you don't need this..no no (whilst sort of waving it above her head), no no...do you really want it? (looking me up and down) Think about it first, no?'



Thanks, i know that there are people here who have had to deal with this too. So i'm glad i can vent here where there is understanding. I was just upset because it sort of makes ya feel violated in the store line lol...i don't have to explain myself to her and she has no right to make me feel like i should. But yeah, that uncomfortable feeling is really crappy. If the front end manager did as she said, which i bet she did, then i'm sure the lady won't do it again. Or at least if she does, then she won't have a job. 



Red said:


> Sorry this happened to you, it's always pretty distressing. The main thing that annoys me is being upset that I'm upset if that makes sense? Annoyed that I let some idiot ruin my day. Hopefully the woman that served you will have a little think about it and not do it again to anyone else.


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## VinnyPA (Jan 10, 2009)

Don't let it bother you Flipper. I've run into morons and jackasses like her in all types of stores from dollar stores to high-end stores. Lots of us have I'm sure.

I dress really, really casual on weekends and rarely shave (except for church). I wear t-shirts and other clothes that are a bit too tight (too cheap to buy new ones honestly LOL). People simply make incorrect assumptions about me. When a lewd comment is made I blast that person with some linguistic intrepidity and a shitty grin. I also do something like pay with a credit card making sure to state the amount of the available outstanding credit. Finally I ask the employee if he/she really enjoys working with consumers and if he/she ever wonders if their life could have been better. Things like that usually make disgruntled employees cringe. I'm sure I've been one of the customers that employees whine about around the ashtray at break time. LOL

If a fly bites, smash it with a sledgehammer.


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## Cors (Jan 10, 2009)

I am sorry it happened to you! It was so inappropriate of her to make a comment like that, and kudos to you for speaking to the manager! I would have ran home and cried my eyes out. 

It was great that she was so understanding about it though. The one time I tried to complain about a horrible waitress who dissed me publicly the manager took one look at me, laughed and told me that I was overreacting.


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## largenlovely (Jan 10, 2009)

[email protected] 

Had i not been so surprised and caught off guard i actually would've gotten rude back with her and told her to mind her own business. I've never had anything like that happen so i totally didn't even see it coming. I'll be prepared if it ever happens again though. 



VinnyPA said:


> Don't let it bother you Flipper. I've run into morons and jackasses like her in all types of stores from dollar stores to high-end stores. Lots of us have I'm sure.
> 
> I dress really, really casual on weekends and rarely shave (except for church). I wear t-shirts and other clothes that are a bit too tight (too cheap to buy new ones honestly LOL). People simply make incorrect assumptions about me. When a lewd comment is made I blast that person with some linguistic intrepidity and a shitty grin. I also do something like pay with a credit card making sure to state the amount of the available outstanding credit. Finally I ask the employee if he/she really enjoys working with consumers and if he/she ever wonders if their life could have been better. Things like that usually make disgruntled employees cringe. I'm sure I've been one of the customers that employees whine about around the ashtray at break time. LOL
> 
> If a fly bites, smash it with a sledgehammer.


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## largenlovely (Jan 10, 2009)

ugh that's horrible...i think i would've asked for the district managers number in that case. 

I got lucky in that the front end manager was pretty chunky. Dad said that she mentioned to him that she was overweight herself on the phone. So i think the front end manager put herself in my shoes. Also i've been going in there for a long time and have always been very nice. I've never had anything to complain about. The front end manager and i have passed each other a number of times and smiled and said "have a good night". So i'm sure she knew that it wasn't just me being a difficult customer either. 

What's crazy is, it wasn't like the cashier was some skinny minny either. I mean, she wasn't big by any means but she was a tall healthy thick-ish older woman. 



Cors said:


> I am sorry it happened to you! It was so inappropriate of her to make a comment like that, and kudos to you for speaking to the manager! I would have ran home and cried my eyes out.
> 
> It was great that she was so understanding about it though. The one time I tried to complain about a horrible waitress who dissed me publicly the manager took one look at me, laughed and told me that I was overreacting.


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## kinkykitten (Jan 10, 2009)

I can understand why you got mad! I'd have felt like giving her a right slap! People are so stupid! Good for you for telling the management... hope she gets a good ass kicking!!!!


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## Weirdo890 (Jan 10, 2009)

I'm sorry you had to deal with that. I can't say I've ever gone through that myself, but maybe that's because think I'm scary. I'm 6'2" and over 300 lbs. and I don't think people want to mess with me. Who knows?


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## jewels_mystery (Jan 10, 2009)

I can't believe this happened to you. But Bravo for handling the situation perfectly. I am so proud that you reported the incident. Rude behavior should never be tolerated.


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## AshleyEileen (Jan 10, 2009)

That's outlandish!

I work in retail and the only time I've asked about sizing is if a woman brings up multiple like items and one is a different size. Most of the time, she just grabbed the wrong one. Also, if I see a woman about my size buying a certain item and I know she didn't try it on, I'll let her know how the sizing runs with that particular item. I just try to be thoughtful.


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## largenlovely (Jan 10, 2009)

thanks y'all...i'm glad i can vent here. Even after sleeping on it i'm still a lil bit angry, but just gonna trust that it was taken care of. 

The only thing i'm bothered by now is that next time i go in there, if she is the cashier, she may try to apologize for it and i would just rather it wasn't even brought up again. Either that or she'll be stupid and rude, in which case she'll be reported again lol


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## largenlovely (Jan 10, 2009)

I'd rather nobody mentioned anything at all when i buy stuff lol, but then again, i buy stuff in smaller sizes at times (particularly for my pictures) Of course, i can't say..."oh yes i know this is small, but see i have this website and the guys like to see me in really tight stuff and ...." LOL




AshleyEileen said:


> That's outlandish!
> 
> I work in retail and the only time I've asked about sizing is if a woman brings up multiple like items and one is a different size. Most of the time, she just grabbed the wrong one. Also, if I see a woman about my size buying a certain item and I know she didn't try it on, I'll let her know how the sizing runs with that particular item. I just try to be thoughtful.


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## EZ-Bunny (Jan 10, 2009)

L&L -- 

Being from Ala-bammy myself (or the Great State of I'll-be-Damn'a), and dealing with rude people at Walmart, and other places, I hope it wasn't a simple miscommunication issue. Since I wasn't there to actually hear how she said it to you, I can't really say very much on this matter.

Is there a chance she may have been saying this to help you? I know if I spotted an error, I may put in my 2-cents worth to try to assist someone before they made a mistake that they regretted later. And you have to admit, there are a lot of stupid people in this state that don't look at the labels and info before they buy, only to return it a few days later. I'd hate to screw over some minimum wage drone that was actually trying to help me. They have it tough enough already.

But if she was saying it sarcstically, then yes.. she deserves what she got. 

besides who needs clothes anyway? (grins)...

EZ'


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## Haunted (Jan 10, 2009)

I'v had it go the other way lol i was buying 4x pajama pants for my GF and the checkout lady looked at me kinda weird! and when i go looking for clothes for my gf or my daughter especially when i'm alone everyone looks at me strange but i guess a biker looking for size 4 little girl tights might be kinda of an odd sight. actually now that i say it if it weren't me i'd be staring too


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## AshleyEileen (Jan 10, 2009)

largenlovely said:


> I'd rather nobody mentioned anything at all when i buy stuff lol, but then again, i buy stuff in smaller sizes at times (particularly for my pictures) Of course, i can't say..."oh yes i know this is small, but see i have this website and the guys like to see me in really tight stuff and ...." LOL



That's completely understandable. 

For example, I've had customers bring up 5 pairs of panties all in the same style and one was a different size. More often than not, she just grabbed the wrong size and is quite happy that I noticed. I'd rather be safe than sorry. It all depends on the customer and if I've built a report with her.


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## Shosh (Jan 10, 2009)

How dare she treat our Large and Lovely in such a way.
You are BBW royalty.:bow:


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## BigBeautifulMe (Jan 10, 2009)

Along the same vein...

I was at the best Indian buffet in town here. I ordered a mango lassi. I :wubu: those things! When I finished it, I asked the waitress for another. She was like "No, no, you want water, water healthier for you!" I was too stunned to say anything. If it ever happens again (I can't not go there, the food's the best!) I'll definitely be saying something to her if she pulls that again. I'd talk to her manager, but it's a family-owned restaurant, and I'm pretty sure she's the wife of the owner.


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## Russ2d (Jan 10, 2009)

> Of course, i can't say..."oh yes i know this is small, but see i have this website and the guys like to see me in really tight stuff and ...." LOL




HAHA! You should have! Then you should have said "They just can't get enough of me!" and it's the absolute truth!!


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## D_A_Bunny (Jan 10, 2009)

Actually I think the best response to any sales or wait person should be - "Do you want my business?" Look them straight in the eye and say it with conviction. Regardless of someone's size, noone should question what they buy from a store or a food location. 

If that alone doesn't do the trick, you can follow up with "Isn't your job reliant on having satisfied customers?"

And if you are in a more flippant mood, there is always "Who are you, the food police?" Of course I wouldn't use that on anyone who might have the opportunity of spitting in my food, but if it was a packaged item, then I might go for it.

And honestly, I just cannot see ever questionning someone on their clothing choices and looking at the size. How do they know who you are buying it for? Maybe it is for your brother who wants a dress and is a bit smaller than you. Or maybe that is what you should just tell her next time.


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## toni (Jan 10, 2009)

I worked as a cashier for a couple of years. Retail and grocery. I didn't care what people were purchasing. My main goal was to scan it and put it in a bag(which is what I was getting paid to do). Why the hell are they looking through your merchandise? No wonder there are such long lines.


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## toni (Jan 10, 2009)

DumbAssBunny said:


> And honestly, I just cannot see ever questionning someone on their clothing choices and looking at the size. How do they know who you are buying it for? Maybe it is for your brother who wants a dress and is a bit smaller than you. Or maybe that is what you should just tell her next time.



Exactly! Good example. I would only comment about items when a question was asked by the customer. "My sister is about your size, do you think that would fit?"


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## largenlovely (Jan 10, 2009)

lol my dad got really mad about this too so we sat up and talked for it for a while last night. I told him i suppose me buying anything like that was the shocking equivalent of him buying tampons "ummm sir, you know you don't need these right, you have a penis" lol



Haunted said:


> I'v had it go the other way lol i was buying 4x pajama pants for my GF and the checkout lady looked at me kinda weird! and when i go looking for clothes for my gf or my daughter especially when i'm alone everyone looks at me strange but i guess a biker looking for size 4 little girl tights might be kinda of an odd sight. actually now that i say it if it weren't me i'd be staring too


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## largenlovely (Jan 10, 2009)

oh yeah...that would be totally different. I can totally understand that. I'd be glad too for someone pointing that out.



AshleyEileen said:


> For example, I've had customers bring up 5 pairs of panties all in the same style and one was a different size. More often than not, she just grabbed the wrong size and is quite happy that I noticed. I'd rather be safe than sorry. It all depends on the customer and if I've built a report with her.


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## largenlovely (Jan 10, 2009)

HA!! I WISH lol



Susannah said:


> How dare she treat our Large and Lovely in such a way.
> You are BBW royalty.:bow:


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## largenlovely (Jan 10, 2009)

isn't it totally aggrivating when they catch ya off guard like that....

you're so stunned that it takes you a minute to process that this really DID just happen and it's hard to respond



BigBeautifulMe said:


> Along the same vein...
> 
> I was at the best Indian buffet in town here. I ordered a mango lassi. I :wubu: those things! When I finished it, I asked the waitress for another. She was like "No, no, you want water, water healthier for you!" I was too stunned to say anything. If it ever happens again (I can't not go there, the food's the best!) I'll definitely be saying something to her if she pulls that again. I'd talk to her manager, but it's a family-owned restaurant, and I'm pretty sure she's the wife of the owner.


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## largenlovely (Jan 10, 2009)

LOL thank you, but erm...while it would make me laugh inside my head thinking about saying it...i can't even imagine what would happen if i ever did hahahaha



Russ2d said:


> HAHA! You should have! Then you should have said "They just can't get enough of me!" and it's the absolute truth!!


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## largenlovely (Jan 10, 2009)

that's what the front end manager said to me and it's what my dad reiterated when he called and spoke to her as well. 

Oh if it happens again, I'm gonna be totally prepared. I was telling my girlfriend about it today. She goes in late at night (sometimes we go together) and she is also larger and rides the cart. My girlfriend said that she's asked her before why she comes in late at night and rides the cart. So i actually am thinking this might be a size issue on her part. Sadly my friend hadn't ever reported her for asking these things. I wish she had...i bet if she says something again she will after hearing what i did. 

Just to add though, that really makes me angry too because I've had an ACL injury and my friend was in a head on collision with a concrete median and broke lots of body parts. So..we've both had injuries that contribute to why we ride the carts, it's not totally size related. There are women my size who walk through the stores. Though i suppose even if it WAS just size related, it's really none of her business to be getting an attitude over. 



DumbAssBunny said:


> And honestly, I just cannot see ever questionning someone on their clothing choices and looking at the size. How do they know who you are buying it for? Maybe it is for your brother who wants a dress and is a bit smaller than you. Or maybe that is what you should just tell her next time.


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## largenlovely (Jan 10, 2009)

yeah i've been a cashier as well back in the day and there were times when a particular man would come in buying womens clothing, pantyhose and heels and i thought "well this is odd". I was obviously much younger and a bit naive .....but i wouldn't have EVER had the audacity to ask him about it. 



toni said:


> I worked as a cashier for a couple of years. Retail and grocery. I didn't care what people were purchasing. My main goal was to scan it and put it in a bag(which is what I was getting paid to do). Why the hell are they looking through your merchandise? No wonder there are such long lines.


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## ChubbyBubbles (Jan 10, 2009)

Awwww...hugs to you hun! I can certainly relate, but in a different way. Over the holidays my son and I went to the mall to see Santa and walk around and window shop (he loves to visit the pet store and throw pennies in the fountain)...anyway, I gave Luke $1 and told him to put it into the Salvation Army bucket. He did and the man looked at him and said "Thank You". The man, who was extremely heavy, looked at me and said "So, is that boy yours?" I smiled and said yes. He then said "No, I mean really? Did you actually give birth to him?" I just looked at him and said "YES!" As I turned to walk away he says "Wow, isn't that something." I was so offended, mad and hurt. I told my husband what happened when he came home from work and immediately he called the mall and The Salvation Army. The very next day we got a phone call from the president of the local Salvation Army. He apologized up and down and made sure that the man would be talked to and possibly be let go of his position. I felt bad for getting this guy into trouble, but at the same time he was rude and what he said to me was uncalled for!


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## largenlovely (Jan 10, 2009)

ugh that is just horrible  What that man said was more blatantly rude in my opinion than what the woman said to me...i think he deserved to be let go. I don't know why people think they have the right to say these types of things.



ChubbyBubbles said:


> Awwww...hugs to you hun! I can certainly relate, but in a different way. Over the holidays my son and I went to the mall to see Santa and walk around and window shop (he loves to visit the pet store and throw pennies in the fountain)...anyway, I gave Luke $1 and told him to put it into the Salvation Army bucket. He did and the man looked at him and said "Thank You". The man, who was extremely heavy, looked at me and said "So, is that boy yours?" I smiled and said yes. He then said "No, I mean really? Did you actually give birth to him?" I just looked at him and said "YES!" As I turned to walk away he says "Wow, isn't that something." I was so offended, mad and hurt. I told my husband what happened when he came home from work and immediately he called the mall and The Salvation Army. The very next day we got a phone call from the president of the local Salvation Army. He apologized up and down and made sure that the man would be talked to and possibly be let go of his position. I felt bad for getting this guy into trouble, but at the same time he was rude and what he said to me was uncalled for!


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## Tarella (Jan 10, 2009)

Sorry that happened to you Melissa....thats all anyone needs. 


I hate the looks that I have gotten for years when I happen to walk into designer or highend boutiques.....some of the salesgirls glance over and nonverbally show their distain or frown.....like "You don't belong in this store". When I was younger, it would stop me from entering, but now I go in and browse. How are they to know whether or not I am buying for myself etc. I wonder if the size 0,2,4 etc girls feel that way in the plus size stores? Would be an interesting sociology study



Sincerely,

Tara


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## AnnMarie (Jan 10, 2009)

Wow... really unbelievable. I'm glad you reported her, she has no right to be commenting on ANYTHING anyone is buying.... I don't care if you lined up with a shovel, duct tape, and a bag of lye (a fun game we were playing on vacation, 3 things you would buy to freak people out) - it's none of her business and certainly not within her right to question you or your purchases. 

And good for your Dad, too.... nice to have someone outraged on your behalf.


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## blubrluvr (Jan 10, 2009)

Uh, how about posting a pic of you in the dress? :blush:


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## wi-steve (Jan 10, 2009)

I had a similar thing happen years ago... I was in Eddie Bauer buying a shirt for my wife for Christmas. Size 14 or 16 probably at the time. When I rang it up the girl said something to the effect of, this is probably much to big for her. It would take a very large woman to wear this. 

Which, in my sick little world was a bit sexy to hear someone say that, but i just muttered that she is very well endowed and left with her shirt.

In retrospect, yeah I wish I would have had called her on it. Or better yet, grinned and told her yes she is big and I love fat girls. 

Steve


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## Cors (Jan 11, 2009)

Tarella said:


> I wonder if the size 0,2,4 etc girls feel that way in the plus size stores? Would be an interesting sociology study



I used to go to plus size stores quite often to buy clothes for my ex and I was impressed by their level of customer service. I have been asked on a couple of occasions if I knew that they don't carry my size, but it has never been done in a negative way. The salesgirls usually just assume that I am buying a gift, and go out of their way to help me make a selection.

On the other hand, I generally do not like shopping in regular stores. The salespeople there tend to be far less personable, and on several occasions they have been snarky and dismissive ("We don't have a kids section here" and "Go eat a sandwich") when I asked if they had something in my size.


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## Shosh (Jan 11, 2009)

ChubbyBubbles said:


> Awwww...hugs to you hun! I can certainly relate, but in a different way. Over the holidays my son and I went to the mall to see Santa and walk around and window shop (he loves to visit the pet store and throw pennies in the fountain)...anyway, I gave Luke $1 and told him to put it into the Salvation Army bucket. He did and the man looked at him and said "Thank You". The man, who was extremely heavy, looked at me and said "So, is that boy yours?" I smiled and said yes. He then said "No, I mean really? Did you actually give birth to him?" I just looked at him and said "YES!" As I turned to walk away he says "Wow, isn't that something." I was so offended, mad and hurt. I told my husband what happened when he came home from work and immediately he called the mall and The Salvation Army. The very next day we got a phone call from the president of the local Salvation Army. He apologized up and down and made sure that the man would be talked to and possibly be let go of his position. I felt bad for getting this guy into trouble, but at the same time he was rude and what he said to me was uncalled for!



That is just awful C. What arrogance.

Sorry that you had to hear that. I hope that man gets spoken to.


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## jennabelle (Jan 11, 2009)

Although I totally feel for you and I definatly agree that it was wrong of her to say something like that.....I'm trying to look at it through the employees point of view.....maybe perhaps she thought that you had accidentally grabbed the wrong size and thought she would help you. I'm just looking at it through my point of view as someone who has been in customer service and has worked at walmart before. I would have the common sense to not say something like that but you have to realize some of the people who do work there......don't have so much common sense....not all of them.....but there are a select few. 

I'm sorry this happened to you. And I definatly agree with the actions that were taken.....but maybe to make it less hurtful.....think of it that way.


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## MaryElizabethAntoinette (Jan 11, 2009)

I just gotta congratulate you on handling it maturely... I would have flipped-a-bitch at her. 

When people give my boyfriend dirty stares on account of his size I usually end up letting them have it. (It's like peoples rudeness towards size bothers me more than my guy, while he's the fatter one in the relationship).
But then again, I have a temper... and it takes all my strength to keep from flipping out on people (when they ask for it). And of course, it really takes a massive amount of ignorance and asshole-ness to make me want to flip out on someone. 

But I'm rambling. 

In conclusion, I'm sure the cashier learned her lesson, or at least she learned to think a little more proficiently. 




I hate getting rude stares, no matter what peoples reasoning is. I have many piercings and I just tend to turn heads (not always in a good way). Like at my school, I'm the only one there with piercings or tattoos or dyed hair. And most of the students (who are fit, blonde, and tan) look at me like I don't belong there. It takes all my strength not to look right back at them and say, "Oh yeah? I go here for free. Suck on it."
Of course that is a completely different situation... but sometimes I feel that if someone is going to judge you on the way you look... they aren't worth the effort. Like in social situations... if someone doesn't talk to me specifically on account of my appearance... then I'm glad, because they are certainly not the kind of person I would want to know anyway. It's a good filter to keep evil people away. *giggles*


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## largenlovely (Jan 11, 2009)

Eep!! I'm sorry i missed ya my fellow Alabamy girl, i somehow overlooked your post

But since y'all are both wondering the same thing...lol

She wasn't being dumb or helpful...i could've allowed myself to wonder the same thing in retrospect, thinking that maybe i misjudged or over-reacted, except that (as i mentioned in another post) A fellow girlfriend who is also overweight and rides the cart late at night in Walmart has also had previous problems with her. 

I'm actually thinking now that either she's just a bitch or has a problem with fat people in general. 



EZ-Bunny said:


> L&L --
> 
> Being from Ala-bammy myself (or the Great State of I'll-be-Damn'a), and dealing with rude people at Walmart, and other places, I hope it wasn't a simple miscommunication issue. Since I wasn't there to actually hear how she said it to you, I can't really say very much on this matter.
> 
> ...





jennabelle said:


> Although I totally feel for you and I definatly agree that it was wrong of her to say something like that.....I'm trying to look at it through the employees point of view.....maybe perhaps she thought that you had accidentally grabbed the wrong size and thought she would help you. I'm just looking at it through my point of view as someone who has been in customer service and has worked at walmart before. I would have the common sense to not say something like that but you have to realize some of the people who do work there......don't have so much common sense....not all of them.....but there are a select few.
> 
> I'm sorry this happened to you. And I definatly agree with the actions that were taken.....but maybe to make it less hurtful.....think of it that way.


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## largenlovely (Jan 11, 2009)

thanks so much everybody...i really appreciate this place bunches. It's nice to be able to deal with something crappy like that and come bitch about it and get support from people who know what it feels like *big hugs to everyone*


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## squidgemonster (Jan 11, 2009)

largenlovely said:


> thanks so much everybody...i really appreciate this place bunches. It's nice to be able to deal with something crappy like that and come bitch about it and get support from people who know what it feels like *big hugs to everyone*



I feel for you too,Its one of the reasons my SSBBW GF never leaves her home,there are too many stares and rude comments about her size.
It totally pisses me off that large folks are usually judged negatively solely because of their size,yet my GF is a wonderful person inside and out.
She is determined to lose some of her 500 lbs this year asit is having a major impact on her health.
To all those who have trouble with rude shopworkers,dont let the bastards grind you down....


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## Catkin (Jan 11, 2009)

Sorry to hear that happened to you, L+L, but at least your complaint was taken seriously, as it should be. I don't think it's ever acceptable to comment on what someone's buying, really.



Tarella said:


> I hate the looks that I have gotten for years when I happen to walk into designer or highend boutiques.....some of the salesgirls glance over and nonverbally show their distain or frown.....like "You don't belong in this store". When I was younger, it would stop me from entering, but now I go in and browse. How are they to know whether or not I am buying for myself etc. I wonder if the size 0,2,4 etc girls feel that way in the plus size stores? Would be an interesting sociology study



I have friends that are a lot thinner than me (best friend is about a UK 8, I'm a 20/22), so when we go shopping I end up in shops that don't have anything in my size, and they end up in the plus size sections / shops. We've never had any comments, and just help each other pick stuff out. I don't really pay attention to the sales people anyway...if they have a problem, it's nothing to do with me :happy:



Cors said:


> On the other hand, I generally do not like shopping in regular stores. The salespeople there tend to be far less personable, and on several occasions they have been snarky and dismissive ("We don't have a kids section here" and "Go eat a sandwich") when I asked if they had something in my size.



That is so rude!  I'm sorry you've had to deal with that. In my opinion, it's not ok to comment negatively on a person's size, whatever it is!


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## D_A_Bunny (Jan 11, 2009)

My husband likes to remember the first time that he went shopping to buy me something when we first met. He went into a local big girls clothing store and the two cute chubby girls working there kept eyeing him suspiciously. 

So finally one of them walked up to him to tell him that the store sold PLUS size clothes, and he says "I know, I am buying something for my girlfriend". And the girl says "Yea, but these are PLUS sized clothes". And he says "Well, she is a size 24, so yeah" (that was many moons ago). And she says "A 24 inch waist or a size 24?". So he goes over to a rack, holds up a big shirt and says, "This big, or maybe even bigger, I know I am in the right store".

Finally the girl believed that he actually had a fat girlfriend that he was buying an outfit for. They were extremely helpful to him and were smiling and happy. He loved the experience.

He doesn't always like remembering the story about the first time he needed to buy me feminine products though. Oh well.


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## Flyin Lilac (Jan 12, 2009)

ChubbyBubbles said:


> Awwww...hugs to you hun! I can certainly relate, but in a different way. Over the holidays my son and I went to the mall to see Santa and walk around and window shop (he loves to visit the pet store and throw pennies in the fountain)...anyway, I gave Luke $1 and told him to put it into the Salvation Army bucket. He did and the man looked at him and said "Thank You". The man, who was extremely heavy, looked at me and said "So, is that boy yours?" I smiled and said yes. He then said "No, I mean really? Did you actually give birth to him?" I just looked at him and said "YES!" As I turned to walk away he says "Wow, isn't that something." I was so offended, mad and hurt. I told my husband what happened when he came home from work and immediately he called the mall and The Salvation Army. The very next day we got a phone call from the president of the local Salvation Army. He apologized up and down and made sure that the man would be talked to and possibly be let go of his position. I felt bad for getting this guy into trouble, but at the same time he was rude and what he said to me was uncalled for!



Granted I don't know what this man's facial or vocal expression was when he said this to you, but is it at _all _possible he was actually _complimenting _you on bringing into the world a fine little boy who understands the concept of helping those less fortunate than he?


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## D_A_Bunny (Jan 12, 2009)

Flyin Lilac said:


> Granted I don't know what this man's facial or vocal expression was when he said this to you, but is it at _all _possible he was actually _complimenting _you on bringing into the world a fine little boy who understands the concept of helping those less fortunate than he?



But then why would he want to know if she "actually gave birth" to him? For me, this man's actions are horrible no matter who he asked. Even if it were a thin woman, how dare he ask her if HER son is really HER son. I believe that someone's child is THEIR child whether they give birth or adopt them. 

PS, please know that I mean nothing negative towards you for asking this question, it is just that this particular story has been burning me up for the very reason I stated above.


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## dodo (Jan 12, 2009)

I wasn't there.

On benefit of doubt, I think this woman might have been trying to save the customer a buck. Assuming you'd "grabbed the wrong one", understanding the aggravation of getting home, achieving disappointment, returning an item - likely having done it herself, repeatedly - a dim little light bulb winked on and her knee jerked, which is connected directly to her sizeable yap, and the pooch was screwed.

Youve done it, I've done it, we all hate it. Wouldn't it be nice to have a little somebody on your shoulder to spare you the hassle? God knows how many times I've zip-a-dee-doo-dah'ed my way home with the wrong one in my back pocket. Only this time it wasn't a mistake. The clerk is unaware there are people out there who will deliberately buy clothing that doesn't fit, funkyazzitsounds. She spoke without thinking, much, and got bit. It's a charged issue. Perhaps she felt she was doing you the favor, one fat lady to another. But she didnt know you. She should have been more concerned with self-preservation and _pinched that aperture._

The rest of us smart, slightly less compassionate, cold-ass bastards would have thought, Eh, its the customer's problem. She cant read, let her go home and learn it the hard way. Im not touching it.

I wasn't there, but this doesn't sound like hate. It sounds like BiMLOTS. Big-mouth-lack-of-tact-syndrome. Have mercy on the stupid. Thats what Jesus would do.

Sorry. No offense. Still a fan. Backing away slowly, now.


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## Shosh (Jan 12, 2009)

DumbAssBunny said:


> But then why would he want to know if she "actually gave birth" to him? For me, this man's actions are horrible no matter who he asked. Even if it were a thin woman, how dare he ask her if HER son is really HER son. I believe that someone's child is THEIR child whether they give birth or adopt them.
> 
> PS, please know that I mean nothing negative towards you for asking this question, it is just that this particular story has been burning me up for the very reason I stated above.



Yes I agree. That man knew very well what he was asking Christal, and he has a bloody nerve for doing so in my opinion. The rudeness of some people never ceases to amaze me.


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## dodo (Jan 12, 2009)

Pardon me for not slogging through all three pages of this burgeoning monstrosity. Or not.


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## AtlantisAK (Jan 12, 2009)

largenlovely said:


> Which, i don't want the ladies job over it, but geeeeeeeze louise...getta f'ing clue right? I mean seriously, i could've been buying that outfit for anyone and JUST because i'm fat she felt it was ok to question me about it. Ugh it made me so mad. I'm still mad...but yeah, i just needed to vent.



Exactly! I think that have no right to question what you purchase. 

It could be for you, for a friend, for anyone else! I've had people question me on my purchases, and once (it was a realy bad day for me) I replied, "No, it's for my boyfriend." It was a real skimpy and small (but stretchy!) dress and I wanted it. The lady got real upset by that because she knew I was being sarcastic. I kinda feel bad for how I said it, but it was a bad day and she realy had no right to question it. 

Now that I do guest modeling, I have the feeling that I'm going to get more treatment like that. They always seem to have the worst attitudes at Wal-mart, don't they? They say -nothing- to me at Rue 21, a skinny person's store!

EDIT: Come to think of it, I've had some less than appropraite comments when I go out shopping for food. I always buy lean, healthy, good quality stuff....and of course, fat people don't eat healthy! We all know that, don't we?!


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## largenlovely (Jan 12, 2009)

Oops..I'd originally posted a response telling you this had already been addressed, but i see that you posted that you read through all the other posts and realized that the particular cashier has caused problems with another friend of mine who is also fat and rides the cart. I wish you were right though but i think this is obviously a problem on the cashiers part. 




dodo said:


> I wasn't there.
> 
> On benefit of doubt, I think this woman might have been trying to save the customer a buck.....


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## largenlovely (Jan 12, 2009)

yeah i've had some man in the store, just a random customer, comment on me buying icecream once. I was NOT very nice back to him...i can't believe the nerve people have sometimes. 



AtlantisAK said:


> EDIT: Come to think of it, I've had some less than appropraite comments when I go out shopping for food. I always buy lean, healthy, good quality stuff....and of course, fat people don't eat healthy! We all know that, don't we?!


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## MadeFA (Jan 13, 2009)

I'm surprised no fantasy writer has taken this story, added a curse to it making the cashier gan 5,000,000,000 lbs, and posted it in the Library here.


Sorry, I just wanted to have a chuckle. 


I hope this woman was able to learn that her unwarranted opinions should be kept in the non-work place WITHOUT losing her job, after all... keeping a job is important in this economy.


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## ChubbyBubbles (Jan 13, 2009)

Flyin Lilac said:


> Granted I don't know what this man's facial or vocal expression was when he said this to you, but is it at _all _possible he was actually _complimenting _you on bringing into the world a fine little boy who understands the concept of helping those less fortunate than he?



You know, for a brief moment I thought to myself that _maybe_ I gave him hope as he was a very large man himself. Maybe, _just maybe_ he thought if an ssbbw like me could have a baby, then _maybe_ someone out there would want him...I don't know. Anything is possible, I guess.


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## Kortana (Jan 13, 2009)

At any Wal-Mart that you visit in Canada when you buy plus-sized clothing it comes up as Maternity clothes. I have made several complaints but it has yet to be fixed.

Ugh, I am FAT not pregnant! GAWD!

LOL


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## Russell Williams (Jan 13, 2009)

largenlovely said:


> I'm not sure if this goes on this board or not..but...
> 
> Ok, so i go into walmart last night. I usually wait until way late at night so i don't have to deal with all the scooters being gone..there's not as many people so i don't have to deal with the crowds and long lines. It's just easier. The night crew there has gotten to know me. I've even made friends with some of them just from going in there late at night all the time.
> 
> ...


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## Russell Williams (Jan 13, 2009)

MaryElizabethAntoinette said:


> I just gotta congratulate you on handling it maturely... I would have flipped-a-bitch at her.
> 
> When people give my boyfriend dirty stares on account of his size I usually end up letting them have it. (It's like peoples rudeness towards size bothers me more than my guy, while he's the fatter one in the relationship).
> But then again, I have a temper... and it takes all my strength to keep from flipping out on people (when they ask for it). And of course, it really takes a massive amount of ignorance and asshole-ness to make me want to flip out on someone.
> ...




What constitutes approved difference and unapproved difference.?

In high school I did not wear percings or have colored hair.

I wore headgear for my braces, (straps that went around the back of my heard, over the top of my head, and from the top strap to the back strap.

I wore hornrimmined glasses that had broken and that my father, using fishing twine, glue, and a think piece of wire, had managed to put back together.

I also wore, on a string around my neck, a small bottle a bleach that my mother had given my so I could correct my mistakes on my assingments.

I also wore, on a string around my neck, a fountain pen so I would always have the cap attached to me and be less likely to lose the pen.

In winter I always wore one or another of my set of plaid flannel shirts.

So is anyone who would would not talk with me not worthy of my time or should I have triied to change my appearence in the attempt to fit in?

I asked my friend if she would have accepted my asking her to high school dance had we both been in the same high school. She is still thinking about it.



Russell Williams


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## LuvBigBoned (Jan 13, 2009)

ChubbyBubbles said:


> Awwww...hugs to you hun! I can certainly relate, but in a different way. Over the holidays my son and I went to the mall to see Santa and walk around and window shop (he loves to visit the pet store and throw pennies in the fountain)...anyway, I gave Luke $1 and told him to put it into the Salvation Army bucket. He did and the man looked at him and said "Thank You". The man, who was extremely heavy, looked at me and said "So, is that boy yours?" I smiled and said yes. He then said "No, I mean really? Did you actually give birth to him?" I just looked at him and said "YES!" As I turned to walk away he says "Wow, isn't that something." I was so offended, mad and hurt. I told my husband what happened when he came home from work and immediately he called the mall and The Salvation Army. The very next day we got a phone call from the president of the local Salvation Army. He apologized up and down and made sure that the man would be talked to and possibly be let go of his position. I felt bad for getting this guy into trouble, but at the same time he was rude and what he said to me was uncalled for!




As the father of a daughter whom everyone assumes (incorrectly) that my wife and I cranked out, I have little tolerance for people who say shit like that. 

And, as someone who has likes/dislikes that don't coincide with stereotypes and have lost patience with people who feel compelled to comment on them, I've developed some standard responses or stolen some from others.


Comment: "That's a lot of sugar."
Response: "Yeah, but it's cheaper than blow."

Comment: "How did a black guy get interested in hockey?"
Response: "I'll answer that when you go ask the short Jewish guy why he's into the NBA. And we've had a scoring champion in the NHL recently."

Comment: (To any one of a number of things) "Are you gay?"
Response: "Why don't you let me take your woman back to my place for a couple of days? Then, you can ask her."
Secondary response: "Not for you."

Response for any lame, unoriginal comment from a boorish guy: Look at his woman and say, "I hope he's more original than that in bed."

Response to any "Is she yours?" or "Oh, so she's not yours," when people find out our daughter is adopted: Long, cold stare, then slowly say, "I feed her, clothe her, wiped her ass, diapered her, get her up in the morning when she doesn't get me up in the morning, put her to bed at night and kiss the boo-boos away that are too small for band-aids. She's mine."


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## LuvBigBoned (Jan 13, 2009)

DumbAssBunny said:


> My husband likes to remember the first time that he went shopping to buy me something when we first met. He went into a local big girls clothing store and the two cute chubby girls working there kept eyeing him suspiciously.
> 
> So finally one of them walked up to him to tell him that the store sold PLUS size clothes, and he says "I know, I am buying something for my girlfriend". And the girl says "Yea, but these are PLUS sized clothes". And he says "Well, she is a size 24, so yeah" (that was many moons ago). And she says "A 24 inch waist or a size 24?". So he goes over to a rack, holds up a big shirt and says, "This big, or maybe even bigger, I know I am in the right store".
> 
> ...



I also don't have patience with retail workers who have a hard time believing I know my wife's sizes, her tastes or that different designers cut things differently. I've finally had to say to some of the women, "Look, after x years together and buying clothes for many of those birthdays, anniversaries, Christmases and Valentine's Days, I know what's going to fit her/what she'll like." 

The Tampon Run was weird the first few times I did them for my mother as an 11-year-old kid. As an adult, I just feel like, come on, let's all grow up.

And, LargeNLovely, I feel awful for you about that cashier's comment. Nobody wants anybody's job over something like that, especially in these economic times, but it sucks when people inflict their narrow-mindedness on you.


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## Melian (Jan 13, 2009)

At the start of a recession, it's amazing how many people don't seem to want their jobs :doh:


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## Frogman (Jan 20, 2009)

Between two strangers the behavior would be inappropriate, but as an employee it's unacceptable -- and I say this as a person with a lot of cashiering experience. Maybe because I've always tried to be respectful it's hard for me to understand this kind of behavior, and I've received it as a customer in different fashions. Now in fairness, retail/customer service/cashier work tends to be relentlessly mind-numbing, dehumanizing, and often ranges from disheartening to soul-crushing because interacting with the general public exposes you to the entire spectrum of human behavior--from salt-of-the-earth, heaven-sent folks to those who use you as a psychological punching bag. And megacorporations are the worst to work for; they're about 2 steps away from barcoding the skulls of their employees.
_Be that as it may_, this person was out of line and needed to be made aware that this kind of behavior is wrong. IMO one of the best qualities as a cashier is when you come to the point where someone's buying a cucumber and some Vaseline and you're able to maintain a poker face. In principle, the personal life of the customer really isn't any business of the cashier (and vice-versa), unless the customer deliberately opens that door.


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## Redhotphatgirl (Jan 22, 2009)

VinnyPA said:


> Don't let it bother you Flipper. I've run into morons and jackasses like her in all types of stores from dollar stores to high-end stores. Lots of us have I'm sure.
> 
> I dress really, really casual on weekends and rarely shave (except for church). I wear t-shirts and other clothes that are a bit too tight (too cheap to buy new ones honestly LOL). People simply make incorrect assumptions about me. When a lewd comment is made I blast that person with some linguistic intrepidity and a shitty grin. I also do something like pay with a credit card making sure to state the amount of the available outstanding credit. Finally I ask the employee if he/she really enjoys working with consumers and if he/she ever wonders if their life could have been better. Things like that usually make disgruntled employees cringe. I'm sure I've been one of the customers that employees whine about around the ashtray at break time. LOL
> 
> If a fly bites, smash it with a sledgehammer.



my gosh i love you. I have missed your wit. hope your well ...if you see me with a hammer you will know why hugs. RED


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## Hathor (Jan 25, 2009)

Knock on wood no one has been so rude to me like that. I think if they did I would flip out and smack them. 

How unprofessional, rude, and unnecessary.


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Jan 25, 2009)

Like you, LnL, I wouldn't have wanted her to get fired or anything but agree that you NEEDED to say something. It's NOT okay for people to pop out comments like that...whether they are getting paid or not. Some damn nerve......


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