# Personal Trainer Anxiety - A Poll



## LillyBBBW

Ok so I'm angry. I'm not quite sure what would be considered a constructive way to channel this anger. It's quite possible I should just let it go too. I'm looking for some advice.

I've had multiple surgeries and injuries over the years. I've been walking with a cane all this time because I can't afford physical therapy. The doctors wanted me to go a minimum of 3 days a week and each appointment costs $25. I just don't have that kind of scratch so I blew it off hoping everything would work itself out. It's become clear though that I'm not doing myself any favors by just schlepping along and it's not getting better. It's getting worse and I'm developing new knots and kinks. So I found this very cheap gym that is in close proximity to my office that I can get to fairly easily given my disposition. My initial consultation was last Thursday.

I go all the way there and the consultant I was scheduled for left moments earlier. Apperently I was never put in the calendar. They try to get another trainer to take me on. After an intense exchange conducted in Spanish (is it me or was that kind of rude? Not to mention I understood every word) the bottom line was nobody was going to help me. Angry and frustrated I decided to march on in and see if I could figure out how to work the machines myself.

Like I said, I'm there to rehab my knees. I walk with a cane which I carried with me when I arrived at the place. I go to get on the leg press and while I'm on there Mr. Spanish Speaking Trainer -- who just prior looked at me with distain as he refused to take me -- came over and was commenting on my form, which I was grateful for at first. I asked him which machines would be good and he said, actually none of these machines are going to do you much good what you need to do is lose a lot of weight first. He then started trying to steer me towards one of the cardio machines.

Ok. I admit I'm not the brightest bead in the rosary but what the fuck is his problem? The man.. straight up LIED.. and tried to disuade me... from an exercise that has incredible benefits... for EVERYBODY... because he can't get over my fat. Once my icy stare wore off I explained my circumstances and he was like, ah it was good that you told me. Then he started to recommend other machines for me and I interrupted him saying oh no, I appreciate your help but I don't want to put you out or anything. He puttered along side me for a bit but then went on. He can fuck right off.  

I'm still angry about this. Douchebags like him are what busted up my joints in the first place. AND... I'm supposed to go back tonight for another appointment with someone else. I know, I know. You're thinking 'get out now' 'why are you still giving them your money' but this gym is only 10 bucks a month and I can't afford physical therapy or a fancier place. This shitty gym is my best option and all I want is to be shown how to adjust the equipment to my size to use it safely. I *know* this will work. My worry is that whoever I get tonight is going to try to do a hard sell on stuff I don't need or use shaming tactics and false information like the other trainer did and provoke a confrontation. My question for the group is, when he starts in with that self-harming bullshit should I hit him with a brick, a crowbar or a pie?


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## Tad

I'm voting crowbar.... sounds like the trainers there have dropped a few dumbbells on their heads over the years, so I'm thinking you'll need something good and solid ;-)

Also, I'm about as far as you can get from being a personal trainer or a physiotherapist, but having seen physiotherapists a few times over the decades for a few things, strengthening is awesome, but all them had a huge focus on stretching. Too tight muscles can cause more problems than they solve, apparently. I don't know, maybe you stretch regularly already, but not, if nothing else, perhaps the trainer could help you finding hamstring and quad stretches that work for you? You are bound to have a lot of strength in those muscles, but if you're dealing with pains they are apt to be tightened up protectively.

Good luck, and I hope that one way or another, you can get some relief.


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## LillyBBBW

Tad said:


> I'm voting crowbar.... sounds like the trainers there have dropped a few dumbbells on their heads over the years, so I'm thinking you'll need something good and solid ;-)
> 
> Also, I'm about as far as you can get from being a personal trainer or a physiotherapist, but having seen physiotherapists a few times over the decades for a few things, strengthening is awesome, but all them had a huge focus on stretching. Too tight muscles can cause more problems than they solve, apparently. I don't know, maybe you stretch regularly already, but not, if nothing else, perhaps the trainer could help you finding hamstring and quad stretches that work for you? You are bound to have a lot of strength in those muscles, but if you're dealing with pains they are apt to be tightened up protectively.
> 
> Good luck, and I hope that one way or another, you can get some relief.



Thanks Tad, and that is very good advice. I've lost an awful lot of my flexibility also. I bought a strap for stretching which I've been using at home but inconsistently.


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## Dr. Feelgood

I voted pie. But make it a cow pie.


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## Jon Blaze

Can I come to the gym and kick him in the liver? PLEASEEE? I haven't kicked anyone in like a year. :/ 

What a douchecanoe.


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## LillyBBBW

Well it turns out I didn't have to hit him with anything. I was on edge going there and things started out slow because it seemed he was stalling about meeting with me. I sat for a little bit and was feeling ruffled at being kept waiting. When he finally came over I could tell right away he was local. Prominent local accent and he talked kinda slow and seemed a bit dim to me. I had to fill out a short sheet and I got around to explaining to him what I was trying to do and he seemed willing to help me but there was a bit of hesitancy in his manner. I couldn't quite read it. Then I realized, this guy was afraid of me. Word of the last time I was there must have got around and it appeared I was THAT lady. You know, the one who comes in and summons the manager and threatens to call the attorney general's office? Her. Anyway, he seemed like a really sweet guy, more the body builder type. He had some good things to say and thankfully he was NOT a hack. 

Oh, and that other trainer? He is even more full of shit than I realized. Last week I asked him if there was an abductor/adductor machine in the gym and he flashed a deer in the headlights look. Then he said no but they would be getting one in a few weeks. Today I find out there is a whole other section of the gym downstairs in the basement of the place with twice as many machines as upstairs, and there is an abductor/adductor machine. I almost think this clown doesn't really work there. If he does, he shouldn't. My trainer took me downstairs to look at the other machines and that Bozo was down there happy and alive, shouting out like we were old friends. I've never seen anything like it in my life.


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## Fuzzy

I voted Pie. No permanent damage except his pride.


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## PunkyGurly74

First off - what a douche nozzle that guy was! UGGGGHHH! One reason I hate going to gyms. And the fake "we're best buds" - always awesome. Glad the sweet one gave you tips because really...you're there to feel better. Being in pain and being hampered by injury is very tiring -- mentally and physically. 

Oh and I voted crowbar - it would learn him for the next time  hehehe j/k!!

I just joined a gym this week. When we did our walk through the other day...I didn't see one person that looked like me. I will be honest, my anxiety was through the roof. However, they do have a small, separate space for women which is great.

Tomorrow I go for the my first time to the new gym (I'm in the process or ordering a new swimsuit too...oh joy! [sarcasm]) and we are going to have a fitness assessment and I asked flat out if he was nice to fatties. Seriously, I'm too old and this is too much money and too important to be treated like shit by someone's whose opinion of me is based solely on my body size. The guy was a bit taken aback, but, responded..no...he's a nice guy. Not sure what that means, but, we shall see.


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## LillyBBBW

PunkyGurly74 said:


> First off - what a douche nozzle that guy was! UGGGGHHH! One reason I hate going to gyms. And the fake "we're best buds" - always awesome. Glad the sweet one gave you tips because really...you're there to feel better. Being in pain and being hampered by injury is very tiring -- mentally and physically.
> 
> Oh and I voted crowbar - it would learn him for the next time  hehehe j/k!!
> 
> I just joined a gym this week. When we did our walk through the other day...I didn't see one person that looked like me. I will be honest, my anxiety was through the roof. However, they do have a small, separate space for women which is great.
> 
> Tomorrow I go for the my first time to the new gym (I'm in the process or ordering a new swimsuit too...oh joy! [sarcasm]) and we are going to have a fitness assessment and I asked flat out if he was nice to fatties. Seriously, I'm too old and this is too much money and too important to be treated like shit by someone's whose opinion of me is based solely on my body size. The guy was a bit taken aback, but, responded..no...he's a nice guy. Not sure what that means, but, we shall see.



I hope your first time went well PunkyGurly74. Since this gym I'm going to is so cheap I've seen quite a few people in there who look like me only not as big. I will say that the people who patronize the gym are great. Mostly people are zoning to get their workout and leave without social interaction. Otherwise I got no vibes from anyone except that ONE guy. He had one of his victims using a machine and then took him to another. A young lady went to use the machine they just got off of and the guy made a point of telling her that they were using that one. She just looked at him and said flatly We Can All Share. The guy is just an asshole and I happened to meet him first. I hope your trainer turns out to be a real nice guy after all.


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## Sweet Tooth

I vote pie. Would probably freak an anti-fatty out the most.

It's good you're a strong woman who knows her wishes and goals. Your purpose there is to become healthier and to get appropriate and professional guidance. Your job is not to lose weight, to be accepted by the jerks that exist, or to receive crap advice because they don't approve of you somehow. As long as they're doing their jobs, you may have to accept a certain level of square peg/round hole, simply because of the culture and assumptions of most gyms.

But I'm glad your second guy seemed a lot more helpful and suitable. Just because someone can lift weights doesn't mean they have any business being a trainer. When I did physical therapy for my torn rotator cuff [thank goodness for insurance!], strength training came before anything remotely resembling cardio for the shoulder. They explained that the goal is to strengthen other muscles to take some of the pressure off the point that we had to work on specifically so it could heal and grow stronger.

Good luck to you!


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## liz (di-va)

LillyBBBW said:


> he said, actually none of these machines are going to do you much good what you need to do is lose a lot of weight first.



WRONG. That crap right there is why I hate fat bigotry and those who practice it. 

Sorry you had to deal with him, I would like to hit him with an anvil.


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## supersizebbw

@Lilly: Well done on joining the gym! I've been in and out of gyms for the last 20yrs or so and the most unfortunate thing I always find is that 99.9% of all personal trainers I've ever met are completely clueless when it comes to training people of size. 

Just hang in there, there's lots of useful info online on beginner gym workouts for bigger folks, folks with injuries etc etc. The last time I was at the gym about a year ago I tailor made my own simple workout to do at my own pace (but thats just because I know what works for *me* and what doesnt). At the end of the day any movement helps no matter how little then you can slowly build up on that, whether it's strength training with machines or free weights (he's a complete idiot for saying that the machines wouldn't help, sigh!), or whether it's cardio even if just walking very slow on the treadmill, or even starting out with the recumbent bike which i find alot more manageable and easier on the joints as I'm unable to use the upright ones, or even if just stretching as Tad suggested! I found out doing stretches before and after my workouts helped immensely with helping prevent post workout stiffness/aches & pains.

I also found out that most people working out pretty much mind their own business (there may be the odd one or two douche bags), but for the most part everyone is busy doing their own thing to be bothered with others. 

After a year's break hoping to rejoin the gym soon too.

Keep doing what you're doing!, don't let that ignorant fool get in the way of your workouts


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## tonynyc

LillyBBBW said:


> ... Anyway, he seemed like a really sweet guy, more the body builder type. He had some good things to say and thankfully he was NOT a hack.
> 
> ...Today I find out there is a whole other section of the gym downstairs in the basement of the place with twice as many machines as upstairs, and there is an abductor/adductor machine. I almost think this clown doesn't really work there. If he does, he shouldn't. My trainer took me downstairs to look at the other machines and that Bozo was down there happy and alive, shouting out like we were old friends. I've never seen anything like it in my life.



*B*y the way Lilly - I think BBW and weightlifting gyms are a great combination. Things can be dangerous and distracting but worth it. 

1. I hope that you've found a workout and trainer that works for you (not all exercises are safe) and not all trainers are good trainers.

2. Sorry to hear that the initial experience was less than pleasant.




LillyBBBW said:


> He had one of his victims using a machine and then took him to another. A young lady went to use the machine they just got off of and the guy made a point of telling her that they were using that one. *She just looked at him and said flatly We Can All Share*. The guy is just an asshole and I happened to meet him first. I hope your trainer turns out to be a real nice guy after all.



The asshole just broke one of the many rules of "gym" etiquette - next time this shitface is waiting for you to finish with your equipment(just leave without wiping it off)

*By the way- I voted for all three - why deny yourself the pleasure*


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## Tad

Lily;

Just thinking way back to your first post, where you mentioned that your doctor wanted you to got o physio three times a week, and that was too expensive. Fair enough, but I'm wondering if you could save up and manage a couple or three sessions?

Ideal treatment might mean seeing them regularly, but if you go in and are up front that you won't be making regular appointments, they may still be able to help you understand the details of some of your issues, and give you guidance on particular exercises and stretches to be doing. I'm probably biased, because this is how I've always used physio--go in once for the analysis and get initial exercises, go in for one follow-up to go over any questions I have and to check I'm doing those things properly, then just carry on doing those things without them.

Sorry that this is off topic of the main gym thread, but the thought has been nagging at me.


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## LillyBBBW

tonynyc said:


> *B*y the way Lilly - I think BBW and weightlifting gyms are a great combination. Things can be dangerous and distracting but worth it.
> 
> 1. I hope that you've found a workout and trainer that works for you (not all exercises are safe) and not all trainers are good trainers.
> 
> 2. Sorry to hear that the initial experience was less than pleasant.


 
My instincts tell me that this is a guy who likes to lift weights. Whatever requirements there are to become a trainer appear to be very loose. He's into the rewards and challenges of weight training, has gained much from it and wants to help people. He didn't appear to me to be assholish at all. In fact, there were a few machines I took interest in and he did well to steer me away from them - either because he felt they held no real benefits and had more potential harm than good or he felt it was too soon to start with the machine as I've not worked out in a while and have challenges. He was passing on what he knew from experience rather than dictating something he saw in an instructional video. He also encouraged me to go back to my PT and have them show me beneficial stretches I can do since they had no such service there. He doesn't exactly have one of those dynamic, hand-clapping enthusiasm personalities but he appears to know what he's talking about and holds no biases that I can see from here.




tonynyc said:


> The asshole just broke one of the many rules of "gym" etiquette - next time this shitface is waiting for you to finish with your equipment(just leave without wiping it off)
> 
> *By the way- I voted for all three - why deny yourself the pleasure*



I'm actually having a dilemma today. I have been looking forward to going to the gym tonight but seem to have developed a head cold. :doh: I was going to tough it out and go anyway wiping up after myself as I go but I'm thinking it may be better not to bring whatever it is I'm struggling with into the gym. It took me so long though to get to the point where I really want to go that I'm kind of fearful that this excuse will lead to others as the days go on and next thing you know it will be June, then December.  



Tad said:


> Lily;
> 
> Just thinking way back to your first post, where you mentioned that your doctor wanted you to got o physio three times a week, and that was too expensive. Fair enough, but I'm wondering if you could save up and manage a couple or three sessions?
> 
> Ideal treatment might mean seeing them regularly, but if you go in and are up front that you won't be making regular appointments, they may still be able to help you understand the details of some of your issues, and give you guidance on particular exercises and stretches to be doing. I'm probably biased, because this is how I've always used physio--go in once for the analysis and get initial exercises, go in for one follow-up to go over any questions I have and to check I'm doing those things properly, then just carry on doing those things without them.
> 
> Sorry that this is off topic of the main gym thread, but the thought has been nagging at me.



I've thought of that too Tad. The Ortho doc who prescribed the PT doesn't have an opening till April though. I would have to go to him just to get the referral which would take too long. I was thinking of going to my primary to see if he can whip one up for once every other week or so after I explain what I'm up to. The ortho is a strict disciplinarian about PT and will prescribe two or three times a week regardless of my ability to pay. It's the party line out of that office. Even the PT told me that it wasn't necessary and that most if not all of what I need to do can be done on my own. It's a lifelong commitment even after the PT script runs out. The PT did show me a few moves but I admit it was some time ago. It might be worth a catch-up course. (PT = Physical Therapy/ist)


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## LillyBBBW

supersizebbw said:


> @Lilly: Well done on joining the gym! I've been in and out of gyms for the last 20yrs or so and the most unfortunate thing I always find is that 99.9% of all personal trainers I've ever met are completely clueless when it comes to training people of size.
> 
> Just hang in there, there's lots of useful info online on beginner gym workouts for bigger folks, folks with injuries etc etc. The last time I was at the gym about a year ago I tailor made my own simple workout to do at my own pace (but thats just because I know what works for *me* and what doesnt). At the end of the day any movement helps no matter how little then you can slowly build up on that, whether it's strength training with machines or free weights (he's a complete idiot for saying that the machines wouldn't help, sigh!), or whether it's cardio even if just walking very slow on the treadmill, or even starting out with the recumbent bike which i find alot more manageable and easier on the joints as I'm unable to use the upright ones, or even if just stretching as Tad suggested! I found out doing stretches before and after my workouts helped immensely with helping prevent post workout stiffness/aches & pains.
> 
> I also found out that most people working out pretty much mind their own business (there may be the odd one or two douche bags), but for the most part everyone is busy doing their own thing to be bothered with others.
> 
> After a year's break hoping to rejoin the gym soon too.
> 
> Keep doing what you're doing!, don't let that ignorant fool get in the way of your workouts



Ooh, I almost forgot to thank you for this post supersizedbbw. It's always helpful to hear encouraging testimony from someone who has actually done it. Thanks so much. I'm afraid I have way too much belly for both the upright and recumbent bikes. When I get my legs about me I'm going to go with the tredmill. I've always liked being on it with my headphones timed to the speed of the mill. It was like a reward for myself rather than a chore, though right now my knees aren't up for it.


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## fritzi

Dear Lilly,
I totally know where you're coming from - a series of sadistic phys ed teachers in school left me with massive gym phobia. (And admittedly a hefty portion of antagonism towards brain-dead gym bodies...  )

A few years ago I broke my should and needed physiotherapy.
My good physiotherapist was pregnant then and went on maternity leave soon after. 
But before she went to the gym three times with me, showed me all the best exercises at the various machines and taught me how to do them. After that I was able to do it on my own - today my shoulder is fine.

Maybe you can afford to pay a physiotherapist you trust for a few sessions to teach you the right exercises. Most gym trainers/employees are not (fully) qualified in rehab and medical therapy anyway.

Good luck & get better soon!


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## one2one

I'm wary of gyms for just this reason. Personal trainers aren't medical professionals and anyone with injuries needs really specific help from qualified practitioners. Lilly, I don't know if this is an option for you, but some PT places offer a sliding fee scale, and I know of a rehab place in my area that will discount their pool pass based on income. They may not, however, mention that unless you let them know that you can't afford the treatment you need. Also, if your doctor is part of a hospital or large practice, they may have a patient/ social service dept. and some resources or ideas for you there.


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## tonynyc

LillyBBBW said:


> Ooh, I almost forgot to thank you for this post supersizedbbw. It's always helpful to hear encouraging testimony from someone who has actually done it. Thanks so much. I'm afraid I have way too much belly for both the upright and recumbent bikes. When I get my legs about me I'm going to go with the tredmill. I've always liked being on it with my headphones timed to the speed of the mill. It was like a reward for myself rather than a chore, though right now my knees aren't up for it.



Are recumbent bikes an option?


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## LillyBBBW

one2one said:


> I'm wary of gyms for just this reason. Personal trainers aren't medical professionals and anyone with injuries needs really specific help from qualified practitioners. Lilly, I don't know if this is an option for you, but some PT places offer a sliding fee scale, and I know of a rehab place in my area that will discount their pool pass based on income. They may not, however, mention that unless you let them know that you can't afford the treatment you need. Also, if your doctor is part of a hospital or large practice, they may have a patient/ social service dept. and some resources or ideas for you there.



The cost of the Physical Therapist isn't the problem, the problem lies with the cost of the copay. I did some research initially to see if there were others out there with issues affording PT care and I found an article about it based out of NYC. Apparently a PT association is fighting with insurance companies to lower their copays so that patients can afford proper care. My copays, for example, cost $25. Physical Therapy can cost anywhere upwards from $60 to more than twice that per session. If the facility lowered their rates to $30, I would pay $25 and the insurance company would pay $5. The money goes directly into the insurance company's pocket. Negotiating with the PT doesn't help the patient at all. For a while I gave up bashes and parties so that I could apply myself to PT. After two months of pool therapy with no measurable improvement the therapist recommended strenght training. There appears to be nothing at all wrong with my range of movement and my flexability is about average. (I was a gymnist before this so I'm not used to having average flexability but that's a whole other story. :-/ ) 

Also I disagree with you. I am satisfied that the trainers at the gym are fully qualified to show me the facility and explain how to use the equipment safely. As long as a qualified doctor has given me the ok to go to a gym there is no reason at all why I shouldn't go as long as I feel healthy enough to do so. After a few weeks, if the doctor gives the okay I am going to take Dan up on his offer of designing an exercise program for me. If it sucks, I won't do it. It's that simple. As far as I'm concerned the gym may be full of baboons but the abductor machine and leg extender isn't going to slap me on the ass and tell me off color jokes about Rastafarians. I'm more worried about not going to the gym. I'm not getting any younger you know.


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## tonynyc

LillyBBBW said:


> . I'm more worried about not going to the gym. I'm not getting any younger you know.



Lilly: Fuck those thoughts. Here is an inspirational video for you....


 80 Year Old Powerlifter -Great Grandmother and Record Setter


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## LillyBBBW

tonynyc said:


> Lilly: Fuck those thoughts. Here is an inspirational video for you....
> 
> 
> 80 Year Old Powerlifter -Great Grandmother and Record Setter



Thanks Tony. It seems my Wolverine healing powers have slowed down a bit and I'm feeling a bit less powerful these days. I still have this cold. Granny's showing us all how to do it though.


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## tonynyc

*Nothing beats the healing powers of rest....feel better Lilly*







*In the meantime - "Trainer Dan" will be busy inspiring others *


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## FatAndProud

Yeah, that's why I avoid meatheads. I just deleted another off my FB that I met from a mutual friend. Ugh, I wouldn't touch one with a 10 ft pole, let alone talk to one lol

As far as a personal trainer, I'd literally say I NEED A TRAINER THAT CAN TRAIN ALL BODY TYPES, BITCH. THAT'S WHAT THEIR DIMWITTED BRAIN WENT TO SCHOOL FOR. KINETICS AND THE BODY, DEAR WATSON.Oh my gosh...as a lady that goes to the gym......I wouldn't have been as nice as you. Oh, lawd. Hide yo kids, hide yo wife, cuz a fat lady just got pissed at the gym...


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## LillyBBBW

FatAndProud said:


> Yeah, that's why I avoid meatheads. I just deleted another off my FB that I met from a mutual friend. Ugh, I wouldn't touch one with a 10 ft pole, let alone talk to one lol
> 
> As far as a personal trainer, I'd literally say I NEED A TRAINER THAT CAN TRAIN ALL BODY TYPES, BITCH. THAT'S WHAT THEIR DIMWITTED BRAIN WENT TO SCHOOL FOR. KINETICS AND THE BODY, DEAR WATSON.Oh my gosh...as a lady that goes to the gym......I wouldn't have been as nice as you. Oh, lawd. Hide yo kids, hide yo wife, cuz a fat lady just got pissed at the gym...



F&P, you are one of the people who inspired me to do this so I thank you! :goodbye: You are awesome. :smitten:


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## FatAndProud

No, you are awesome. Don't let these negative people deter you. By moving you're doing more than those sitting on the couch. Also, remember you have 3-5x the weight as these ignorant people to lug around - who's really working out?  

Maybe a kettle ball and lunges/squats could be less impact and more size friendly? Don't knock it until you try it  And then do a bit of walking until you gain strength in your knees? Just throwing it out there. Big girls gotta stick together.


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## QuadSeekers

LillyBBBW said:


> Ok so I'm angry. I'm not quite sure what would be considered a constructive way to channel this anger. It's quite possible I should just let it go too. I'm looking for some advice.
> 
> I've had multiple surgeries and injuries over the years. I've been walking with a cane all this time because I can't afford physical therapy. The doctors wanted me to go a minimum of 3 days a week and each appointment costs $25. I just don't have that kind of scratch so I blew it off hoping everything would work itself out. It's become clear though that I'm not doing myself any favors by just schlepping along and it's not getting better. It's getting worse and I'm developing new knots and kinks. So I found this very cheap gym that is in close proximity to my office that I can get to fairly easily given my disposition. My initial consultation was last Thursday.
> 
> I go all the way there and the consultant I was scheduled for left moments earlier. Apperently I was never put in the calendar. They try to get another trainer to take me on. After an intense exchange conducted in Spanish (is it me or was that kind of rude? Not to mention I understood every word) the bottom line was nobody was going to help me. Angry and frustrated I decided to march on in and see if I could figure out how to work the machines myself.
> 
> Like I said, I'm there to rehab my knees. I walk with a cane which I carried with me when I arrived at the place. I go to get on the leg press and while I'm on there Mr. Spanish Speaking Trainer -- who just prior looked at me with distain as he refused to take me -- came over and was commenting on my form, which I was grateful for at first. I asked him which machines would be good and he said, actually none of these machines are going to do you much good what you need to do is lose a lot of weight first. He then started trying to steer me towards one of the cardio machines.
> 
> Ok. I admit I'm not the brightest bead in the rosary but what the fuck is his problem? The man.. straight up LIED.. and tried to disuade me... from an exercise that has incredible benefits... for EVERYBODY... because he can't get over my fat. Once my icy stare wore off I explained my circumstances and he was like, ah it was good that you told me. Then he started to recommend other machines for me and I interrupted him saying oh no, I appreciate your help but I don't want to put you out or anything. He puttered along side me for a bit but then went on. He can fuck right off.
> 
> I'm still angry about this. Douchebags like him are what busted up my joints in the first place. AND... I'm supposed to go back tonight for another appointment with someone else. I know, I know. You're thinking 'get out now' 'why are you still giving them your money' but this gym is only 10 bucks a month and I can't afford physical therapy or a fancier place. This shitty gym is my best option and all I want is to be shown how to adjust the equipment to my size to use it safely. I *know* this will work. My worry is that whoever I get tonight is going to try to do a hard sell on stuff I don't need or use shaming tactics and false information like the other trainer did and provoke a confrontation. My question for the group is, when he starts in with that self-harming bullshit should I hit him with a brick, a crowbar or a pie?




LillyBBW, First off, congratulations for being strong enough to get past bad first experiences at your gym. I wanted to share my personal experience with a bum knee.

It was 2006, I was about 330lbs and I got a personal trainer. He came to my house 3x per week (hell yes this was expensive) and worked out with me for a very, very intense hour. I worked out alone the other two weekdays.

After about six weeks I noticed that my knees were hurting. I brought it up to him but he said, that is just sore! You are supposed to be sore! from working out. Three weeks later, I fired him because sore! turned into...can hardly walk. I decided that I didn't want to stop working out so I joined a super friendly gym with a big ass pool and aquajogged for two months straight. Then I moved up to the recumbent bike, then the elliptical and finally I had zero knee pain---all told this took about seven months. 

I'm saying all this to say:

if you can work out in a pool, that may be the easiest thing for your knee.

it may take a long time before you are completely healed.

in any case, your can-do attitude will get you there.

best wishes!


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## LillyBBBW

QuadSeekers said:


> LillyBBW, First off, congratulations for being strong enough to get past bad first experiences at your gym. I wanted to share my personal experience with a bum knee.
> 
> It was 2006, I was about 330lbs and I got a personal trainer. He came to my house 3x per week (hell yes this was expensive) and worked out with me for a very, very intense hour. I worked out alone the other two weekdays.
> 
> After about six weeks I noticed that my knees were hurting. I brought it up to him but he said, that is just sore! You are supposed to be sore! from working out. Three weeks later, I fired him because sore! turned into...can hardly walk. I decided that I didn't want to stop working out so I joined a super friendly gym with a big ass pool and aquajogged for two months straight. Then I moved up to the recumbent bike, then the elliptical and finally I had zero knee pain---all told this took about seven months.
> 
> I'm saying all this to say:
> 
> if you can work out in a pool, that may be the easiest thing for your knee.
> 
> it may take a long time before you are completely healed.
> 
> in any case, your can-do attitude will get you there.
> 
> best wishes!



Thanks so much QuadSeeker, this gives me hope.  I got excited when the hospital I go to said they had a pool on site where they did physical therapy. It was short lived when I arrived and realized it was a well built tank similar to the one Tom Hanks was placed in for the filming of "Splash." People sat in chairs and passers by could see right into the tank as I did the exercises the doctor instructed me to do from the floor. Every now and then she would get up from her chair and show me the right way to do the moves if I wasn't doing them properly. After a few months of this the head of the PT department asked me if I noticed any improvement at all. When I said no, the strength training was suggested. She saw no reason for me to continue draining my bank account trying to correct an issue that I don't really have. Though I must say, I'm really appalled at how hard it is to come by a pool that has aqua therapy after normal business hours. These pools cater their time slots to retired and elderly citizens. I had to skip lunch hours and leave work early to make it to appointments that were added just to accommodate my availability. I really feel like the gym is the right move for me.


----------



## PunkyGurly74

Well, we have had 2 appointments with our trainer.

The first one was underwhelming. I'm a fatty - not a flower. The second one was more promising, but, due to my schedule this week we could only go at the busiest time. Oh I hated it. It was good stuff, but, I get so tired of being stared at and the looks. I'm by far the biggest person there hands down. I saw some chunky girls..one was a BBW, but, even the women in the locker room stare at me. Yes, I know I'm huge. Ugh. 

We are going in today to work out. I gotta pick up my bathing suit I ordered - so, I might swim - that is another hurdle. This next week we can meet at times where there will be far less people there and I'm looking forward to that. And no, I'm not an un-confident wall-flower. Nor am I not a confident person. I have self-esteem. But, honestly, I try to avoid places where I am constantly being judged on appearance alone i.e. gyms, bars, life..lol Just after about 200 awkward stares and negative looks I'm finished. I just want to go home. I have never found gyms to be supportive environments unless you already at an ideal weight and are there maintaining or bulking up.

My trainer is nice...but, we shall see what happens. The work out this last time he realized I didn't even break a sweat and that I wasn't happy. Like I said...I'm a fatty not a flower. I'm very physically strong and I have a lot of endurance believe it or not. He was surprised when I explained I had a sports background - no one believes you when you are fat. But, in a month, if things haven't picked up..going to ask for another trainer.

All that being said, I'm going to the gym later today and I'm going to do the strength training and then attempt to swim without having a stroke at having to wear a bathing suit lol


----------



## LillyBBBW

PunkyGurly74 said:


> Well, we have had 2 appointments with our trainer.
> 
> The first one was underwhelming. I'm a fatty - not a flower. The second one was more promising, but, due to my schedule this week we could only go at the busiest time. Oh I hated it. It was good stuff, but, I get so tired of being stared at and the looks. I'm by far the biggest person there hands down. I saw some chunky girls..one was a BBW, but, even the women in the locker room stare at me. Yes, I know I'm huge. Ugh.
> 
> We are going in today to work out. I gotta pick up my bathing suit I ordered - so, I might swim - that is another hurdle. This next week we can meet at times where there will be far less people there and I'm looking forward to that. And no, I'm not an un-confident wall-flower. Nor am I not a confident person. I have self-esteem. But, honestly, I try to avoid places where I am constantly being judged on appearance alone i.e. gyms, bars, life..lol Just after about 200 awkward stares and negative looks I'm finished. I just want to go home. I have never found gyms to be supportive environments unless you already at an ideal weight and are there maintaining or bulking up.
> 
> My trainer is nice...but, we shall see what happens. The work out this last time he realized I didn't even break a sweat and that I wasn't happy. Like I said...I'm a fatty not a flower. I'm very physically strong and I have a lot of endurance believe it or not. He was surprised when I explained I had a sports background - no one believes you when you are fat. But, in a month, if things haven't picked up..going to ask for another trainer.
> 
> All that being said, I'm going to the gym later today and I'm going to do the strength training and then attempt to swim without having a stroke at having to wear a bathing suit lol



Ugh, it sounds like you are trapped in an ignorance festival Punky. lol I would cut some slack on the trainer, at least for one more try. I think it's better for a trainer to err on the side of caution than to go OMGDEFATZZT and try to muscle you into a suicide mission just to soothe their own inner sense of fat hatred. It's better to come back and say Is That All You Got? than to never be seen again because your knees are all jacked up like mine. 

As for the stares, if it gets too crazy I just stop and stare back. This usually snaps them out of it, but it does get tiring. I don't care how strong and confident you are, the impact of anything impactful is still impactful. It makes you want to throw hammers. And sometimes you just don't want to be bothered. Headphones with my favorite tune-out/tune-in music helps. In the past I've found that after some consistency at the gym, my 'new car' smell goes away and people lose interest. So far, the few times I've been to my gym I didn't get that but I admit, it's a cheap gym and there are a lot of characters in there. If I wanted a good place to go people watch, this would be a good place to go. Doesn't look like anyone is really there for that, I mostly get the vibes from the people behind the counter. Don't let them steal your strength.


----------



## FatAndProud

Don't forget, ladies....they could be staring in admiration of your beauty, strength, courage, drive, effort, etc. Don't always think they're out to get you - and the ones that are, aren't worth your energy or gym time lol

M.O.B. Muscles Over......sorry...lol Bitches


----------



## LillyBBBW

FatAndProud said:


> Don't forget, ladies....they could be staring in admiration of your beauty, strength, courage, drive, effort, etc. Don't always think they're out to get you - and the ones that are, aren't worth your energy or gym time lol
> 
> M.O.B. Muscles Over......sorry...lol Bitches



I know I know, but still. Staring at someone is such a dehumanizing thing regardless of the reason. I would never stare at someone. I've caught myself doing so on occasion but during those times I wasn't actually looking at them, I was deep in thought and was looking at nothing in particular while my eyes rested upon them. A stern gaze was what it took to snap me out of it. There are people who get visibly angry if they catch you staring at them because it truly does count as an invasion of personal space. People get tired of certain characteristics about them -- chosen or not, good or bad -- signaling the right for some to treat them less than human. After a while it does get tiring and I feel inclined to remind people in large groups how rude they're being and that I'm still a person up in here. Usually I'm so into what I'm doing that I don't notice but if I notice you staring, your game is too hard man. Turn it down.


----------



## FatAndProud

LillyBBBW said:


> I know I know, but still. Staring at someone is such a dehumanizing thing regardless of the reason. I would never stare at someone. I've caught myself doing so on occasion but during those times I wasn't actually looking at them, I was deep in thought and was looking at nothing in particular while my eyes rested upon them. A stern gaze was what it took to snap me out of it. There are people who get visibly angry if they catch you staring at them because it truly does count as an invasion of personal space. People get tired of certain characteristics about them -- chosen or not, good or bad -- signaling the right for some to treat them less than human. After a while it does get tiring and I feel inclined to remind people in large groups how rude they're being and that I'm *still a person up in here*. Usually I'm so into what I'm doing that I don't notice but if I notice you staring, your *game is too hard man. Turn it down.*



Lmao too funny but true


----------



## lucca23v2

LillyBBBW said:


> I go all the way there and the consultant I was scheduled for left moments earlier. Apperently I was never put in the calendar. They try to get another trainer to take me on. After an intense exchange conducted in Spanish (is it me or was that kind of rude? Not to mention I understood every word) the bottom line was nobody was going to help me.



This is extremely rude. I never speak in Spanish unless I first make everyone else aware of what I will be speaking of if I am in mixed company. It is rude and makes people feel uncomfortable. He is beyond being a douche.. he was a straight up MAJOR a-hole. 




LillyBBBW said:


> He can fuck right off.  My question for the group is, when he starts in with that self-harming bullshit should I hit him with a brick, a crowbar or a pie?



You should go with the standard spanish thing.. get the dreaded "chancleta" and throw it at him from across the room....lol

SInce there is no Chancleta option.. I say pull a Tanya Harding.. crowbar!

I hope it works out for you.


----------



## LillyBBBW

lucca23v2 said:


> This is extremely rude. I never speak in Spanish unless I first make everyone else aware of what I will be speaking of if I am in mixed company. It is rude and makes people feel uncomfortable. He is beyond being a douche.. he was a straight up MAJOR a-hole.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> You should go with the standard spanish thing.. get the dreaded "chancleta" and throw it at him from across the room....lol
> 
> SInce there is no Chancleta option.. I say pull a Tanya Harding.. crowbar!
> 
> I hope it works out for you.



HAHAHAHAHHAAHAA!!! I would have straightened him right out.  You get a First Laugh Of The Day Rep. As soon as I can figure out how to give Rep on this phone.


----------



## PunkyGurly74

I got 5 minutes...I never have enough time lately! Ugh!

So...the reality is I'm not a shy, backwards girls. My weight is the highest it has ever been - so, I'm an SSBBW and people do stare. It happens all of the time. I'm not a hyper aware person, just an aware person. I don't believe it is because they are "out to get me"...I think it is people's propensity for making judgement calls or for staring at oddities..for people watching. For varied reasons, however, after awhile..it is tiresome is all I was trying to say. 


Back to the workout..

So..he is no longer treating me like a flower..he made me work - dammit!  However, I finally am sweating..it is all good. Dreading tomorrow. At this moment, I may not particularly care for the gym, but, I do like our trainer.


----------



## LillyBBBW

PunkyGurly74 said:


> I got 5 minutes...I never have enough time lately! Ugh!
> 
> So...the reality is I'm not a shy, backwards girls. My weight is the highest it has ever been - so, I'm an SSBBW and people do stare. It happens all of the time. I'm not a hyper aware person, just an aware person. I don't believe it is because they are "out to get me"...I think it is people's propensity for making judgement calls or for staring at oddities..for people watching. For varied reasons, however, after awhile..it is tiresome is all I was trying to say.
> 
> 
> Back to the workout..
> 
> So..he is no longer treating me like a flower..he made me work - dammit!  However, I finally am sweating..it is all good. Dreading tomorrow. At this moment, I may not particularly care for the gym, but, I do like our trainer.



Sounds great Punky, I'm glad that part has worked itself out.


----------



## LillyBBBW

I finally got to go!  I took my time going through the rotation, working the upper body as well as the lower. I was there a bit early before the rush and there was a whole other cast of characters there. Things went well except for two issues. Issue number one, I find some of the machines to be a bit compact. It was tricky trying to get them adjusted well, A few of the seats recline but they don't move back which was disappointing. Some of them were difficult to get into and out of. I actually had to call one of the staff members to come and fetch me out of the Abductor machine which is one of the big winners according to my physical therapist. This was kind of why I wanted someone to show me the ropes. I'm anxious about not fitting properly on the machines and injuring myself trying to get on or off of them. I did ok but it was a worrisome challenge.

Issue number two: I have even less flexibility than I thought.  After the workout I went over to the stretching matt and about halfway down to the floor I knew I had made a mistake but it was too late. I thought, "Oh Em Gee, I'm not going to be able to get up from here." I did some stretches and noticed on one side my range of motion was noticeably impaired. I just didn't realize. I had an inkling something was not so wonderful when I had trouble getting on and off of the machines. My lack of flexibility hindered my balance making it tricky trying to step over bars and other obstacles to get on. Then sliding down to the floor on to that mat, that was the dead giveaway. I managed to downward-dog myself up after sitting there for quite a while testing my body out but it was quite a mental standoff. So yeah, this isn't really the smooth sail I had imagined it would be. I'm glad I know though. Beyond that it seems I have no choice, I have to go back to PT. At this point I feel it's a safety issue though I'm really disappointed. I feel so ready for this inwardly. I don't want to give up. :sad:

On a happy note, the people at the gym are really great. I don't know what it is about arriving early but the trainers there were VERY nice. They came over and offered help when they saw me trying to figure stuff out. My nice trainer wasn't there but my Spanish hero stormed in later with furrowed brow - mad and fussing about something, I don't know. I couldn't hear because I had my headphones on. But mostly everybody was about as welcoming as one could muster in such an environment. Also I think I was being hit on! Some guy in there kept checking. I thought it was because I made him nervous like I might kill myself on one of machines or maybe he wanted the machine but no. :huh: Weird huh? He seemed nice.


----------



## tonynyc

LillyBBBW said:


> ... On a happy note, the people at the gym are really great. I don't know what it is about arriving early but the trainers there were VERY nice. They came over and offered help when they saw me trying to figure stuff out.... Also I think I was being hit on! Some guy in there kept checking. I thought it was because I made him nervous like I might kill myself on one of machines or maybe he wanted the machine but no. :huh: Weird huh? He seemed nice.




I think you were being hit on Lilly- this is why BBW and weightlifting gyms make for a wonderful; but, dangerous distraction. IMO that's like going to Muscle Beach - ONLY BETTER !!!!!!!! :happy: :happy: :happy:

*CURVES still needs to be co-ed*


----------



## lucca23v2

It always amazes me how body builders tend to go for big women. Such a contrast. body builders normally hit on me no matter where I am. My thin friends think it is hilarious.


----------



## lucca23v2

Lilly, I am just glad that you have nice people helping you and not that spanish prick from the lat time.

You are inspiring me to go to the gym.


----------



## LillyBBBW

tonynyc said:


> I think you were being hit on Lilly- this is why BBW and weightlifting gyms make for a wonderful; but, dangerous distraction. IMO that's like going to Muscle Beach - ONLY BETTER !!!!!!!! :happy: :happy: :happy:
> 
> *CURVES still needs to be co-ed*



I heard some people talking about Curves going out of business. I'm not sure if they were just speaking of a few franchises or the whole kit and kaboodle but Curves isn't doing so well. I looked into them and it doesn't seem like my kind of formula. I prefer co-ed places myself though I'm all for men and women having private places to recompose themselves if that's what they need. As long as it's not harmful I guess. 



lucca23v2 said:


> It always amazes me how body builders tend to go for big women. Such a contrast. body builders normally hit on me no matter where I am. My thin friends think it is hilarious.



Lucca23v2 you will get a kick out of this story. My brother is a body builder himself and at one time he had this friend who used to show up all the time at the train stop where I used to work. I would sometimes leave a little early and sometimes a little late and this guy would often happen to be in the station and he would try to holler at me. One day he showed up beside me at the supermarket. I'm not trying to say he was stalking me or anything but it seemed odd that suddenly I kept running in to him all the time and he would try to chat me up about opera. Later when I saw my brother I asked him what was up with his friend. He was genuinely confused when I told him what was going on. My bothers eyes widened and he started to laugh out loud. Apparently he was trying to set this guy up with my thinner sister. This guy would carry on to my brother about how much he liked his sister and all this time he thought he was talking about my younger sister. When he asked her about it she said she didn't know what he was talking about. lol The thought never crossed his mind. Incidents like this are few and far between these days. I'm far from having people throwing themselves at my feet but I will say a fair number of times it has been some kind of heavy lifter.


----------



## lucca23v2

As Tonynyc said....CURVES still needs to be co-ed

I think co-ed gyms are better. More motivating. And I have noticed that men will help you if they see youmarenserious.. where as women.. not so much.


----------



## lucca23v2

@ LillyBBBW- that is awesome! I don't know if they see big girls and it is the contrast of a hard bodynand a soft jiggly body...or theynthink they wont need to work out as much becuase theynhave a bbw that will work them out..lol


----------



## LillyBBBW

lucca23v2 said:


> As Tonynyc said....CURVES still needs to be co-ed
> 
> I think co-ed gyms are better. More motivating. *And I have noticed that men will help you if they see youmarenserious.. where as women.. not so much.*



That is a very good point. I hadn't really thought of that angle and I admit, this has been my experience too. Still, I think about muslim women and others who would have reasons to seek a private gym. I'm with you though, I'm more comfrotable in a co-ed atmosphere.


----------



## LillyBBBW

Welp. After my initial workout at the gym I decided to give it a week's rest. I noticed after the first visit I felt joint soreness in my hip and my knees. I believe this came from my attempt at stretching and I feared that maybe I had made a mistake. Whatever aggravation I caused with the stretching was temporary and I felt safe giving it another shot. My second time around, my muscles seem to engage a lot more than last time. Looking around I noticed the same cast of characters were at the gym, including the patrons. I recognized many of them. My body seemed to warm up a bit more and I had an easier time getting on and off the machines than before. While I was making my rounds I was able to observe the trainers in the gym and check them out. 

Let me confess right now that I have a rather unpleasant bias against the first trainer I saw there. Just the sight of him has me puckering my lips tightly and picking him apart in my head which I don't want to do. I'm really not trying to feed that wolf in my life. Honestly though, I do think he's a bad trainer. This is maybe the second time I've seen him training two people at once and he seemed to take a sadistic pleasure in running his trainees through the motions without any investment beyond enjoying making them work. I won't judge because the people he worked with seemed to like it. Some people are in to that.

By contrast there was another trainer there who was working with a woman who really impressed me. Don't get me wrong, he worked her hard but his exercises seemed more targeted and beneficial. He watched her form and corrected her when she was off. While she was still doing her squats he was over at the other station preparing the machine/equipment for her to move from one exercise to another. All was done in a circuit and though it was not an easy workout by any means, he wasn't trying to punish her if that makes any sense. He's got a lot of polish but at this point and at many forseeable points beyond I would say he is definitely out of my league. I'd need to be in a whole lot better shape to mess with him.

At this point my attention has been stolen by another trainer there at the gym. When I first arrived I saw my nice trainer upstairs in passing. We waved a friendly hello as I passed to go downstairs. (I have problems with stairs which is a bad thing about this gym but I digress) There's another trainer down there. This guy's an older guy and I've seen him down there conversing with some of the other staff and watching out for people in the gym. I approached a machine that exercises the shoulders and contemplated whether or not I should give it a go. He comes up and asks if I need help. He gets on the machine, shows how it works, puts it at it's lowest setting and lets me give it a try. Before I started he put my hands in the proper position and showed me the right level to start from. He seemed to really 'know.' Generally speaking the trainers that hang around in there are eager to help if you need it. This guy in particular gave me the impression that he's seen it all. This may not actually be true, but he made me feel very confident and the exercise worked well on my bum shoulder. He's definitely moved up the list as a possible trainer I will ask for in the future.

In the meantime my workout was much better this time around. I stretched when I got home and today I definitely feel like something is happening. I'm going to keep it up.


----------



## FatAndProud

LillyBBBW said:


> Welp. After my initial workout at the gym I decided to give it a week's rest. I noticed after the first visit I felt joint soreness in my hip and my knees. I believe this came from my attempt at stretching and I feared that maybe I had made a mistake. Whatever aggravation I caused with the stretching was temporary and I felt safe giving it another shot. My second time around, my muscles seem to engage a lot more than last time. Looking around I noticed the same cast of characters were at the gym, including the patrons. I recognized many of them. My body seemed to warm up a bit more and I had an easier time getting on and off the machines than before. While I was making my rounds I was able to observe the trainers in the gym and check them out.
> 
> Let me confess right now that I have a rather unpleasant bias against the first trainer I saw there. Just the sight of him has me puckering my lips tightly and picking him apart in my head which I don't want to do. I'm really not trying to feed that wolf in my life. Honestly though, I do think he's a bad trainer. This is maybe the second time I've seen him training two people at once and he seemed to take a sadistic pleasure in running his trainees through the motions without any investment beyond enjoying making them work. I won't judge because the people he worked with seemed to like it. Some people are in to that.
> 
> By contrast there was another trainer there who was working with a woman who really impressed me. Don't get me wrong, he worked her hard but his exercises seemed more targeted and beneficial. He watched her form and corrected her when she was off. While she was still doing her squats he was over at the other station preparing the machine/equipment for her to move from one exercise to another. All was done in a circuit and though it was not an easy workout by any means, he wasn't trying to punish her if that makes any sense. He's got a lot of polish but at this point and at many forseeable points beyond I would say he is definitely out of my league. I'd need to be in a whole lot better shape to mess with him.
> 
> At this point my attention has been stolen by another trainer there at the gym. When I first arrived I saw my nice trainer upstairs in passing. We waved a friendly hello as I passed to go downstairs. (I have problems with stairs which is a bad thing about this gym but I digress) There's another trainer down there. This guy's an older guy and I've seen him down there conversing with some of the other staff and watching out for people in the gym. I approached a machine that exercises the shoulders and contemplated whether or not I should give it a go. He comes up and asks if I need help. He gets on the machine, shows how it works, puts it at it's lowest setting and lets me give it a try. Before I started he put my hands in the proper position and showed me the right level to start from. He seemed to really 'know.' Generally speaking the trainers that hang around in there are eager to help if you need it. This guy in particular gave me the impression that he's seen it all. This may not actually be true, but he made me feel very confident and the exercise worked well on my bum shoulder. He's definitely moved up the list as a possible trainer I will ask for in the future.
> 
> In the meantime my workout was much better this time around. I stretched when I got home and today I definitely feel like something is happening. *I'm going to keep it up*.



Good! That's all that matters! Do it for strength and mobility. And bravo for recognizing you needed that week break. Don't push too hard....being fitter is a lifelong deal. Learn to use your exercise time as your zen place  You're strong mentally, let's reflect that physically


----------



## lucca23v2

LillyBBBW said:


> Welp. After my initial workout at the gym I decided to give it a week's rest. I noticed after the first visit I felt joint soreness in my hip and my knees. I believe this came from my attempt at stretching and I feared that maybe I had made a mistake. Whatever aggravation I caused with the stretching was temporary and I felt safe giving it another shot. My second time around, my muscles seem to engage a lot more than last time. Looking around I noticed the same cast of characters were at the gym, including the patrons. I recognized many of them. My body seemed to warm up a bit more and I had an easier time getting on and off the machines than before. While I was making my rounds I was able to observe the trainers in the gym and check them out.
> 
> Let me confess right now that I have a rather unpleasant bias against the first trainer I saw there. Just the sight of him has me puckering my lips tightly and picking him apart in my head which I don't want to do. I'm really not trying to feed that wolf in my life. Honestly though, I do think he's a bad trainer. This is maybe the second time I've seen him training two people at once and he seemed to take a sadistic pleasure in running his trainees through the motions without any investment beyond enjoying making them work. I won't judge because the people he worked with seemed to like it. Some people are in to that.
> 
> By contrast there was another trainer there who was working with a woman who really impressed me. Don't get me wrong, he worked her hard but his exercises seemed more targeted and beneficial. He watched her form and corrected her when she was off. While she was still doing her squats he was over at the other station preparing the machine/equipment for her to move from one exercise to another. All was done in a circuit and though it was not an easy workout by any means, he wasn't trying to punish her if that makes any sense. He's got a lot of polish but at this point and at many forseeable points beyond I would say he is definitely out of my league. I'd need to be in a whole lot better shape to mess with him.
> 
> At this point my attention has been stolen by another trainer there at the gym. When I first arrived I saw my nice trainer upstairs in passing. We waved a friendly hello as I passed to go downstairs. (I have problems with stairs which is a bad thing about this gym but I digress) There's another trainer down there. This guy's an older guy and I've seen him down there conversing with some of the other staff and watching out for people in the gym. I approached a machine that exercises the shoulders and contemplated whether or not I should give it a go. He comes up and asks if I need help. He gets on the machine, shows how it works, puts it at it's lowest setting and lets me give it a try. Before I started he put my hands in the proper position and showed me the right level to start from. He seemed to really 'know.' Generally speaking the trainers that hang around in there are eager to help if you need it. This guy in particular gave me the impression that he's seen it all. This may not actually be true, but he made me feel very confident and the exercise worked well on my bum shoulder. He's definitely moved up the list as a possible trainer I will ask for in the future.
> 
> In the meantime my workout was much better this time around. I stretched when I got home and today I definitely feel like something is happening. I'm going to keep it up.



lol.. I would need a combination of the trainers. I need someone who is like the first trainer because I can be a mule when I don't want to do something. So I need someone who is going to push me to do it. Other days I need someone who will nicely encourage me to do the tasks without the fight. Then there are days I don't want anyone pushing or prodding.. I just want someone to correct and step away.

It sounds like you found a good gym. I hate stairs too. I have a bad knees. But I am going to check into planet fitness. You are inspiring me to get to the gym.


----------



## LillyBBBW

FatAndProud said:


> Good! That's all that matters! Do it for strength and mobility. And bravo for recognizing you needed that week break. Don't push too hard....being fitter is a lifelong deal. Learn to use your exercise time as your zen place  You're strong mentally, let's reflect that physically



This is my goal. I want to tear through the streets and slash the words "puny god" on the chests of all who dare oppose me. Rrrrr! Right now I will settle for just getting on and off the bus without a struggle.  Thanks F&P!



lucca23v2 said:


> lol.. I would need a combination of the trainers. I need someone who is like the first trainer because I can be a mule when I don't want to do something. So I need someone who is going to push me to do it. Other days I need someone who will nicely encourage me to do the tasks without the fight. Then there are days I don't want anyone pushing or prodding.. I just want someone to correct and step away.
> 
> It sounds like you found a good gym. I hate stairs too. I have a bad knees. But I am going to check into planet fitness. You are inspiring me to get to the gym.



I hear you lucca23v2. Who knows? Maybe one day when I've conquered every hilltop and feel I've run out of challenges I may go and let the first trainer beat on me for a while. I will say that I'm glad I am going to the gym now. The worst part was just doing it. It took me years to cross that bridge in my head. I knew the day would come when I would be ready and I'm so glad I finally got here. I'm glad I waited too. If I were in the wrong frame of mind and met up with that trainer that day I think it would have been quite a monkey wrench in the workings in my head. I don't think I would have gone back and you would be able to smell my Yelp review for miles.


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## Pokerking2010

You don't have to stand so close to him to swing a crowbar.


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## ConnieLynn

lucca23v2 said:


> lol.. I would need a combination of the trainers. I need someone who is like the first trainer because I can be a mule when I don't want to do something. So I need someone who is going to push me to do it. Other days I need someone who will nicely encourage me to do the tasks without the fight. Then there are days I don't want anyone pushing or prodding.. I just want someone to correct and step away.
> 
> It sounds like you found a good gym. I hate stairs too. I have a bad knees. But I am going to check into planet fitness. You are inspiring me to get to the gym.



I've been going to PF and I like it. Clean, cheap ($10), and lots of regular people. I have a couple of friends that go, so we meet up at times, but I also feel comfortable going solo. It's a friendly gym.


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## ConnieLynn

Lilly, congrats on getting to the gym and not letting a jerk sidetrack you. It's so hard just to go through the door without added negativity. Give 'em hell


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## LillyBBBW

Hey everybody. Thanks so much for your well wishes. It's been a few weeks and I feel that my mobility has improved significantly. I still have pain in my MCL. All the litterature on those types of injuries say that two weeks of elevation and rest is the cure and I simply don't have two weeks to throw away so it has never healed properly. Not sure what to do about that but all of the other dings and surgical weaknesses are straightening right out. I feel that by summer, maybe even mid spring, I may be ready for some form of cardio activity which makes me happy. I would really like to get moving again. If anyone else is woundering if simple weight training will improve mobility and minimize pain I'd say a resounding yes.


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## FatAndProud

LillyBBBW said:


> Hey everybody. Thanks so much for your well wishes. It's been a few weeks and I feel that my mobility has improved significantly. I still have pain in my MCL. All the litterature on those types of injuries say that two weeks of elevation and rest is the cure and I simply don't have two weeks to throw away so it has never healed properly. Not sure what to do about that but all of the other dings and surgical weaknesses are straightening right out. I feel that by summer, maybe even mid spring, I may be ready for some form of cardio activity which makes me happy. I would really like to get moving again. If anyone else is woundering if simple weight training will improve mobility and minimize pain I'd say a resounding yes.



I am very proud of you. I can tell you're mentally strong and that makes you a knock-out! I'm glad you have seen results and that your work was not in vain. Congratulations


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## ThatFatGirl

I'm glad you're feeling better! You are brave - and inspirational.


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## LillyBBBW

Thanks so much ladies.


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## supersizebbw

Bumping this thread...which is so relevant to me right now. Now on week 3 of having re-joined the gym after a 3 year hiatus tsk tsk.

It's really nice to read that i'm not the only one who goes through that initial "gym intimidation" stage sigh!


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## fatsmagic

Lilly,
You are doing so well, I applaud you for sticking to what YOU want to do, and ignore the idiots who want to side-track you into something that is not what you need.
I used to lift heavy weights, but after a while I realised this is actually not a healthy way to live. Most of the huge bodybuilders are really not healthy at all (not all but most).
Many personal trainers do not know much at all, and have only done some basic course that teaches them the bare bones of fitness training. The most effective way of achieving your goals is to talk to others who have been through what you are trying to do, and balance that with your own knowledge gained (all of the information is out there on the tinterweb).
Huge bodybuilders mostly do not care about health (some do, but most don't), and getting huge is the most important thing above everything else. This results in androgenic anabolic steroid abuse (which obviously has it's own health issues), and constant injuries from over-training and incorrect form.
I actually hate gym's, because of the gym-bunny attitude in most, it's hard to find one with genuine none-judgemental people in. I'm lucky, I have room to train at home, and have found that mountain biking is the best addition alongside medium weights to achieve what I want. I hope you can also find a way to reach your target too 
The best advice I have picked up : listen to your body.


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## LillyBBBW

Thanks fatsmagic. This thread is kind of old and I haven't updated in a while. In the end the gym was helpful. I found that with the mild exercises I was doing it wasn't really improving my mobility at all. In fact, it seemed to worsen my condition which was really scary and discouraging. Upon further examination it turns out I have some kind of inflammatory issues and though the exercises were helpful to my muscles they aggravated the symptoms and I had to stop going to the gym. No one is certain yet what is going on but I decided not to wait around before doing something to help myself. I adopted a change in diet. Those of you who know me well know that I would rather do anything than diet but the benefits of these changes have been too startling to ignore. They said, "Oh my GAAAD, goody goody, you're going to lose so much weight on this diet!!" That has not happened at all but I do feel much better. My balance still isn't 100% so I can't lose the cane yet but on several occasions I accidentally walked off and forgot to take it with me, something I never would have done a year ago. So poo, I'm forced to obsess about food for a while - at least till I develop a livable routine. I haven't given up my gym membership and plan to return at some point in the future. The monthly fee has gone up to $15 though so if I find something cheaper I will be switching.

How are you doing Supersizebbw?


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## supersizebbw

Hi Lilly,

I've been good thanks for asking  Wow, i'm really glad to hear that your new way of eating has really helped improve your health, wishing you all the best as you continue on 

Wow, how time flies! Since my last post, I continued with the gym and still go regularly (i finally got used to the douchebags lol), who i guess got used to me being there all the time. So after a long long time can finally say i no longer feel intimidated at the gym. Don't know what's wrong with people sometimes sigh. 

In my situation it has really helped to improve my health as well and being able to breathe easier, sleep easier and get more things done during my days. I also changed how i eat so that has really helped me too. So i think for now will keep plodding on with this new way of life.

All the best


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