# Dating: how was your most recent date?



## LovelyLiz (Jan 14, 2010)

A few of us in the Singles Thread talked about having a place where all of us out there in the dating scene can share about dates we go on, commisserate, get feedback, celebrate, share experiences, laugh, be horrified, and all that. 

All kinds of dates: The Good. The Bad. The Certifiable. 

I don't have a date to share at the moment...but here's the thread, and I look forward to posting in it in the near future, and reading other people's experiences and knowing I'm not alone in this crazy world of dating.


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## Weirdo890 (Jan 14, 2010)

In order for me to fully participate, I would have to have had a date. I've never gone on one before. Hopefully the new year and my 21st birthday will change it all. I am available, ladies.


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## succubus_dxb (Jan 15, 2010)

Let me start this off with a Shabang.....


I have been on two dates since 2010 has been upon us. "Great!" you might say. Nay, I say. One I took to the strippers, the other I just made a complete drunken fool of myself in front of. Did either call me again? No they did not. Did I get drunk and send angry/hurt/upset texts messages to both? 

Yes I do.


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## Lovelyone (Jan 15, 2010)

I went on a date just before Christmas with a nice gentleman. I had a great time. I took the commuter train to Chicago (here he was in town for work) and he picked me up and drove me to the Shedd Aquarium. He asked me ahead of time what I would like to do..and made some suggestions as he had been in Chicago many times for work. I thought that this was so sweet of him to do, cos I had never been there before. He was thoughtful in every way from dropping me off at the door while he parked--so I didn't have to walk too far, to allowing me my sit breaks when I needed them, to holding my hand (which I think he did to put me at ease). He was polite, complimentary and funny the entire time. We had a wonderful dinner and he made sure to get me back to the train station on time so that I didn't miss the last train. This was a VERY pleasant change from the last time I went on a date in Chicago...where my previous date made me wait several hours for him in the train station, and didn't even have the courtesy to make sure I got on the train to go home when the date was over (much less call a few days later to see how things were).


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## LovelyLiz (Jan 15, 2010)

succubus_dxb said:


> Let me start this off with a Shabang.....
> 
> 
> I have been on two dates since 2010 has been upon us. "Great!" you might say. Nay, I say. One I took to the strippers, the other I just made a complete drunken fool of myself in front of. Did either call me again? No they did not. Did I get drunk and send angry/hurt/upset texts messages to both?
> ...



Major props for venturing out there, even if the outcome was less than stellar each time. How did you meet these guys?

And about drunken texts/IMs to guys who don't call back or follow through...yeah, I'm right there with you. Then there's the wave of regret that passes over me in the morning, and I check my sent messages on my phone, and think...dang.


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## succubus_dxb (Jan 15, 2010)

mcbeth said:


> Major props for venturing out there, even if the outcome was less than stellar each time. How did you meet these guys?
> 
> And about drunken texts/IMs to guys who don't call back or follow through...yeah, I'm right there with you. Then there's the wave of regret that passes over me in the morning, and I check my sent messages on my phone, and think...dang.



I met them online. I'm always very upfront about my size, but I do think this factored it. Along with me acting like a nutbag...


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## littlefairywren (Jan 15, 2010)

Last date was before Christmas....
He was lovely, charming and very attentive. We met for a coffee, that went well (albeit a few nerves). After the coffee, he offered to drive me home which I thought was very sweet. We get into his car...and I just kinda launched myself at him. In the nicest possible way mind you  I don't know who was more surprised. I thought I had scared him off lol. Nooo....

That set up the next date, and well that was a complete disaster. Short story...

1. Hotel (What the....!)
2. Big bag of toys (His not mine)
3. Exit stage left
4. Long train ride home alone


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## Lovelyone (Jan 15, 2010)

This post just goes to show that men will be men, no matter what continent they are on. Sorry that you had that happen to you. ((big hugs))




littlefairywren said:


> Last date was before Christmas....
> He was lovely, charming and very attentive. We met for a coffee, that went well (albeit a few nerves). After the coffee, he offered to drive me home which I thought was very sweet. We get into his car...and I just kinda launched myself at him. In the nicest possible way mind you  I don't know who was more surprised. I thought I had scared him off lol. Nooo....
> 
> That set up the next date, and well that was a complete disaster. Short story...
> ...


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## steely (Jan 15, 2010)

littlefairywren said:


> Last date was before Christmas....
> He was lovely, charming and very attentive. We met for a coffee, that went well (albeit a few nerves). After the coffee, he offered to drive me home which I thought was very sweet. We get into his car...and I just kinda launched myself at him. In the nicest possible way mind you  I don't know who was more surprised. I thought I had scared him off lol. Nooo....
> 
> That set up the next date, and well that was a complete disaster. Short story...
> ...



Wow, just wow! See, the men have no filter thing, is proving to be true. Sorry that happened, better luck next time. 
(goes to the corner and begins to shake quietly)


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## LovelyLiz (Jan 15, 2010)

Lovelyone said:


> I went on a date just before Christmas with a nice gentleman. ....



Woot woot! So glad you had a great date. It's nice to have evidence that there are people out there who are considerate and kind.



littlefairywren said:


> That set up the next date, and well that was a complete disaster. Short story...
> 
> 1. Hotel (What the....!)
> 2. Big bag of toys (His not mine)
> ...



Sorry you had that discouraging experience LFW. It seems like an all too possible situation. Just to clarify - I was wondering a couple of things. How did you guys decide to meet at a hotel? Was it meant to be a sexy meeting? And if so, was it just the toys then that were kind of over the line for you? Or was the whole thing just sprung on you out of nowhere?


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## thatgirl08 (Jan 15, 2010)

Okay, so. The bad date that in part helped to spurr the creation of this thread:

This guy responded to my Craigslist ad.. he didn't really seem like my type but he was especially charming so I decided to give it a whirl. BIG. NO. First of all, his pictures were barely indicative of what he looked like.. he was thinner, more well groomed and had way less acne in the picture. I'm not one to be extremely shallow but this guy looked like he rolled out of bed.. he was somewhat unattractive to me anyway but the fact that it appeared he put hardly any effort in at all turned me off.. we're talking messy 5 o'clock shadow (not the hot scruffy kind), wrinkled shirt, etc. I was like oh god as soon as he started walking towards me. He gave me a really awkard side hug.. I wish I could explain this better but basically he put his arm around me and hugged me but only one arm/side and it was mad awkward like HI I DON'T KNOW YOU? So we go inside and I can tell he's made nervous and he kept getting more and more nervous and it was making me nervous because he was so jittery and didn't look at my eyes like at all and when we got to the table it was even worse.. hardly saying anything and kept looking everywhere else and stuttering. Not only was that all a turn off but he also told me he came from an overprotective (ahhh), very religious (AHHHH) family. He also stated, literally this is a direct quote "I didn't have friends in high school and I don't have many friends now either." At the end, he asked me on another date (?), gave me another side hug (??) and then KISSED ME (????????????????) I was like this can't be happening. He called me up a few days ago to see if I wanted to do something but I told him I wasn't interested in seeing him again (nicely of course.) Overall.. bad.


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## LoveBHMS (Jan 15, 2010)

Started out nice. Not as cute as his picture but whatevs, I can live with that. He was divorced and we got into talking about relationships and what we wanted out of them and then he blurts out "I mean really, who the fuck wants to die alone". And I thought "In some cases it might be preferable."

Then he told me about how he got busted for DUI on his last date and all about the field sobriety test. And he told me different options you have when they pull you over because "I mean I get pulled over a lot for this."

Thankfully I'd taken the ever popular safety precaution of driving myself to the restaurant.

The only nice thing was since I told him i'd been a waitress, he showed me the bill and asked how much he should tip. I really love it when people do that when they're out with me. 

I texted him and said "no chemistry" and he agreed, so all's well that end well.


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## calauria (Jan 15, 2010)

thatgirl08 said:


> Okay, so. The bad date that in part helped to spurr the creation of this thread:
> 
> This guy responded to my Craigslist ad.. he didn't really seem like my type but he was especially charming so I decided to give it a whirl. BIG. NO. First of all, his pictures were barely indicative of what he looked like.. he was thinner, more well groomed and had way less acne in the picture. I'm not one to be extremely shallow but this guy looked like he rolled out of bed.. he was somewhat unattractive to me anyway but the fact that it appeared he put hardly any effort in at all turned me off.. we're talking messy 5 o'clock shadow (not the hot scruffy kind), wrinkled shirt, etc. I was like oh god as soon as he started walking towards me. He gave me a really awkard side hug.. I wish I could explain this better but basically he put his arm around me and hugged me but only one arm/side and it was mad awkward like HI I DON'T KNOW YOU? So we go inside and I can tell he's made nervous and he kept getting more and more nervous and it was making me nervous because he was so jittery and didn't look at my eyes like at all and when we got to the table it was even worse.. hardly saying anything and kept looking everywhere else and stuttering. Not only was that all a turn off but he also told me he came from an overprotective (ahhh), very religious (AHHHH) family. He also stated, literally this is a direct quote "I didn't have friends in high school and I don't have many friends now either." At the end, he asked me on another date (?), gave me another side hug (??) and then KISSED ME (????????????????) I was like this can't be happening. He called me up a few days ago to see if I wanted to do something but I told him I wasn't interested in seeing him again (nicely of course.) Overall.. bad.



Damn!! He must hate himself not to put any care into his appearance and that was disrepectful to you!! He needs to get himself together before he starts dating..ie having a lil more self esteem, his was waaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyy to low...


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## thatgirl08 (Jan 15, 2010)

calauria said:


> Damn!! He must hate himself not to put any care into his appearance and that was disrepectful to you!! He needs to get himself together before he starts dating..ie having a lil more self esteem, his was waaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyy to low...



I totally agree! I wanted to be like wow, couldn't you have brushed your hair and put on a clean shirt?


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## LovelyLiz (Jan 15, 2010)

thatgirl08 said:


> I totally agree! I wanted to be like wow, couldn't you have brushed your hair and put on a clean shirt?



Definitley. That blows my mind. And sometimes I wonder if it's not a self-protective mechanism, like if they don't put much effort into it, they won't feel as bad when it doesn't work out or the other person doesn't like them or something. But maybe I'm giving them too much credit, and they're really just completely obtuse.

Also, I think that guy must have moved to Rochester from L.A., because I think I went out with him about a year ago.


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## thatgirl08 (Jan 15, 2010)

mcbeth said:


> Also, I think that guy must have moved to Rochester from L.A., because I think I went out with him about a year ago.



Haha, from what I hear you and I aren't the only lucky ones to have spotted this guy. He really gets around.


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## calauria (Jan 15, 2010)

thatgirl08 said:


> I totally agree! I wanted to be like wow, couldn't you have brushed your hair and put on a clean shirt?



LOL!! This reminds me of a time when a "friend" tried to fix me up with someone she knew was a crackhead and had sex with prostitutes, plus he was unattractive to me and told her time again that I thought he was and also he had no front teeth. But, she kept stating he had such a wonderful personality. I was like F*** THAT!!!! LOL!!


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## calauria (Jan 15, 2010)

littlefairywren said:


> Last date was before Christmas....
> He was lovely, charming and very attentive. We met for a coffee, that went well (albeit a few nerves). After the coffee, he offered to drive me home which I thought was very sweet. We get into his car...and I just kinda launched myself at him. In the nicest possible way mind you  I don't know who was more surprised. I thought I had scared him off lol. Nooo....
> 
> That set up the next date, and well that was a complete disaster. Short story...
> ...



Gosh!!! I hate it when you're ready to get your groove on and dude bursts out with some crazy shit!!! I feel your pain.


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## thatgirl08 (Jan 15, 2010)

calauria said:


> LOL!! This reminds me of a time when a "friend" tried to fix me up with someone she knew was a crackhead and had sex with prostitutes, plus he was unattractive to me and told her time again that I thought he was and also he had no front teeth. But, she kept stating he had such a wonderful personality. I was like F*** THAT!!!! LOL!!



Haha yeah.. crackhead + no teeth + sex with prostitutes is a big no all around for me.


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## littlefairywren (Jan 15, 2010)

mcbeth said:


> Woot woot! So glad you had a great date. It's nice to have evidence that there are people out there who are considerate and kind.
> 
> 
> 
> Sorry you had that discouraging experience LFW. It seems like an all too possible situation. Just to clarify - I was wondering a couple of things. *How did you guys decide to meet at a hotel? Was it meant to be a sexy meeting? And if so, was it just the toys then that were kind of over the line for you? Or was the whole thing just sprung on you out of nowhere?*







calauria said:


> Gosh!!! I hate it when you're ready to get your groove on and dude bursts out with some crazy shit!!! I feel your pain.



He offered to pick me up at the train. I just assumed we were heading for dinner, but he drove us straight to a hotel. So I just tried to act all cool, you know...I didn't want to look like a total dork. We get to the room and there on the floor at the base of the bed was his bag of goodies. OPEN for the world to see, and I kinda panicked right there. LOL, it was not that he was packing a "pleasure basket"...it was more that he just *assumed* it was ok to think I was up for it. I hardly knew the guy!! I felt really stupid for putting myself in that position. This is no excuse in any way, but he was the first guy I dated after my 18 yr marriage so I felt really out of my depth. Oh well....live and learn right.


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## steely (Jan 15, 2010)

littlefairywren said:


> He offered to pick me up at the train. I just assumed we were heading for dinner, but he drove us straight to a hotel. So I just tried to act all cool, you know...I didn't want to look like a total dork. We get to the room and there on the floor at the base of the bed was his bag of goodies. OPEN for the world to see, and I kinda panicked right there. LOL, it was not that he was packing a "pleasure basket"...it was more that he just *assumed* it was ok to think I was up for it. I hardly knew the guy!! I felt really stupid for putting myself in that position. This is no excuse in any way, but he was the first guy I dated after my 18 yr marriage so I felt really out of my depth. Oh well....live and learn right.



Ick!!! Oh, littlefairywren, you shouldn't have felt stupid. He was the stupid one in that situation. I just hate that so much for you.

I confess the thought of having to do the "dating" thing at some point, terrifies me and really leads me to believe I will forever be alone. This thread is hammering that home very well.


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## littlefairywren (Jan 15, 2010)

steely said:


> Ick!!! Oh, littlefairywren, you shouldn't have felt stupid. He was the stupid one in that situation. I just hate that so much for you.
> 
> I confess the thought of having to do the "dating" thing at some point, terrifies me and really leads me to believe I will forever be alone. This thread is hammering that home very well.



Thanks steely. It still makes me feel sick in the tummy, when I think about how vulnerable I was in that position. 

I did not think I would ever get to that point of wanting to date, after being married for so long either. It terrified me too. But give it time, one day you may just change your mind.


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## LovelyLiz (Jan 15, 2010)

littlefairywren said:


> He offered to pick me up at the train. I just assumed we were heading for dinner, but he drove us straight to a hotel. So I just tried to act all cool, you know...I didn't want to look like a total dork. We get to the room and there on the floor at the base of the bed was his bag of goodies. OPEN for the world to see, and I kinda panicked right there. LOL, it was not that he was packing a "pleasure basket"...it was more that he just *assumed* it was ok to think I was up for it. I hardly knew the guy!! I felt really stupid for putting myself in that position. This is no excuse in any way, but he was the first guy I dated after my 18 yr marriage so I felt really out of my depth. Oh well....live and learn right.



Dang! Totally uncalled for. Glad you got out of there. 

It's really hard for me in this whole dating thing to want to be physical (in some way) and enjoy that, even on the first date, but then not to send the guy the message that I'm just looking for a hook-up. Not that you did that, your story just brought up how it's hard for me to bring the physical into the relationship soon, but then not feel like it becomes the only thing the guy wants to do/talk about. That's a big frustration for me.


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## littlefairywren (Jan 15, 2010)

mcbeth said:


> Dang! Totally uncalled for. Glad you got out of there.
> 
> It's really hard for me in this whole dating thing to want to be physical (in some way) and enjoy that, even on the first date, but then not to send the guy the message that I'm just looking for a hook-up. Not that you did that, your story just brought up how it's hard for me to bring the physical into the relationship soon, but then not feel like it becomes the only thing the guy wants to do/talk about. That's a big frustration for me.



I totally get that too. Of course my reaction in the car did not help matters, on our first date. But he was like a glass of water, and I was the man crawling on the sand in the desert...you know what I am saying. 

Either way, the whole physical thing stresses me out.


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## the_captain (Jan 15, 2010)

littlefairywren said:


> He offered to pick me up at the train. I just assumed we were heading for dinner, but he drove us straight to a hotel. So I just tried to act all cool, you know...I didn't want to look like a total dork. We get to the room and there on the floor at the base of the bed was his bag of goodies. OPEN for the world to see, and I kinda panicked right there. LOL, it was not that he was packing a "pleasure basket"...it was more that he just *assumed* it was ok to think I was up for it. I hardly knew the guy!! I felt really stupid for putting myself in that position. This is no excuse in any way, but he was the first guy I dated after my 18 yr marriage so I felt really out of my depth. Oh well....live and learn right.



(((((lfw))))) I'm so sorry that happened. I'm just glad that you got out of there and back home safely! Be careful out there, young lady!! (You can't see it but I'm wagging my finger at you...)


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## the_captain (Jan 15, 2010)

LoveBHMS said:


> Started out nice. Not as cute as his picture but whatevs, I can live with that. He was divorced and we got into talking about relationships and what we wanted out of them and then he blurts out "I mean really, who the fuck wants to die alone". And I thought "In some cases it might be preferable."
> 
> Then he told me about how he got busted for DUI on his last date and all about the field sobriety test. And he told me different options you have when they pull you over because "I mean I get pulled over a lot for this."



I'm sorry, but as I read this I couldn't help but think of the scene in the movie _Look Who's Talking_ where Molly is on a date with some nerdy accountant who can't stop describing his barium enema in great detail. LoveBHMS, I'm glad you were able to get rid of Mr. DUI!


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## thatgirl08 (Jan 16, 2010)

Guysss! I have a date tomorrow!


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## LovelyLiz (Jan 16, 2010)

thatgirl08 said:


> Guysss! I have a date tomorrow!



Woooooo! Hope it goes well! I'll be waiting for your full report. 

(I actually may too! Depends on whether he has to work the Golden Globes.)


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Jan 16, 2010)

Lovelyone said:


> I went on a date just before Christmas with a nice gentleman. I had a great time. I took the commuter train to Chicago (here he was in town for work) and he picked me up and drove me to the Shedd Aquarium. He asked me ahead of time what I would like to do..and made some suggestions as he had been in Chicago many times for work. I thought that this was so sweet of him to do, cos I had never been there before. He was thoughtful in every way from dropping me off at the door while he parked--so I didn't have to walk too far, to allowing me my sit breaks when I needed them, to holding my hand (which I think he did to put me at ease). He was polite, complimentary and funny the entire time. We had a wonderful dinner and he made sure to get me back to the train station on time so that I didn't miss the last train. This was a VERY pleasant change from the last time I went on a date in Chicago...where my previous date made me wait several hours for him in the train station, and didn't even have the courtesy to make sure I got on the train to go home when the date was over (much less call a few days later to see how things were).



This sounds wonderful Terri. Are you going to be going out again? 



littlefairywren said:


> 1. Hotel (What the....!)
> 2. Big bag of toys (His not mine)
> 3. Exit stage left
> 4. Long train ride home alone



What is it about men and toys? :blink:



calauria said:


> Damn!! He must hate himself not to put any care into his appearance and that was disrepectful to you!! He needs to get himself together before he starts dating..ie having a lil more self esteem, his was waaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyy to low...





thatgirl08 said:


> I totally agree! I wanted to be like wow, couldn't you have brushed your hair and put on a clean shirt?



Also keep in mind that they are on "good behavior" on that first date.....it all just goes downhill from there :doh:



littlefairywren said:


> *snip* he was the first guy I dated after my 18 yr marriage so I felt really out of my depth. Oh well....live and learn right.





steely said:


> Ick!!! Oh, littlefairywren, you shouldn't have felt stupid. He was the stupid one in that situation. I just hate that so much for you.
> 
> I confess the thought of having to do the "dating" thing at some point, terrifies me and really leads me to believe I will forever be alone. This thread is hammering that home very well.



It IS hard to step back into it....not only has the world around you changed but so have YOU. Biggest difference? The way I meet some men.....hence, my "screening" methods had to change. 
It's like riding a bike though......clumsy and some falls at first....but it gets smoother over time and with practice


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## LoveBHMS (Jan 16, 2010)

thatgirl08 said:


> Guysss! I have a date tomorrow!



Yay. And that last dude set the bar pretty low so if his hair is brushed he's like starting out ten points up.

Hope this one is as cute as his photograph.


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## thatgirl08 (Jan 16, 2010)

mcbeth said:


> Woooooo! Hope it goes well! I'll be waiting for your full report.
> 
> (I actually may too! Depends on whether he has to work the Golden Globes.)



lolll, and thanks!



LoveBHMS said:


> Yay. And that last dude set the bar pretty low so if his hair is brushed he's like starting out ten points up.
> 
> Hope this one is as cute as his photograph.



Me too because he be lookin gooooood, let me tell you.


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## intraultra (Jan 17, 2010)

Oh my, the posts in here thus far are not making me excited about getting back into dating, haha. I haven't had a date recently but I think I'd like to maybe find a date for my birthday (the 31st). So either I could have a wonderful birthday or a terrible one, but at least it won't be boring.

I decided to revive my profile on a dating site (POF) and since yesterday I've gotten a little over a dozen responses, most of them horrid. I chose the one message that piqued my interest the most and replied. He shut me down because I said I'm not particularly into sports. Isn't that what your buddies are for? Is that really a deal breaker? Lame. Then he said "but if you ever just want to have some fun..." Right. And he had some BS on his profile about being serious about finding someone, blah blah.


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## LovelyLiz (Jan 17, 2010)

intraultra said:


> I decided to revive my profile on a dating site (POF) and since yesterday I've gotten a little over a dozen responses, most of them horrid. I chose the one message that piqued my interest the most and replied. He shut me down because I said I'm not particularly into sports. Isn't that what your buddies are for? Is that really a deal breaker? Lame. Then he said "but if you ever just want to have some fun..." Right. And he had some BS on his profile about being serious about finding someone, blah blah.



Oh, POF...what a mixed bag that place is. What I can't BELIEVE is when men think a message like "I want to lick your tits like cupcakes" or "Nice rack" is actually a good way to strike up a conversation. Like, I am supposed to respond to that in some way?

I've actually met some interesting people on POF lately, after wading through all the guys who want a hookup or the guys who think asking "What is your favorite color?" is the start of a deep, getting-to-know-you conversation. So hope you find a few good ones in the bunch!


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## jewels_mystery (Jan 17, 2010)

littlefairywren said:


> Last date was before Christmas....
> He was lovely, charming and very attentive. We met for a coffee, that went well (albeit a few nerves). After the coffee, he offered to drive me home which I thought was very sweet. We get into his car...and I just kinda launched myself at him. In the nicest possible way mind you  I don't know who was more surprised. I thought I had scared him off lol. Nooo....
> 
> That set up the next date, and well that was a complete disaster. Short story...
> ...



wow. What a tool. I am so sorry.


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## Paquito (Jan 17, 2010)

I really want to punch my gender in the ballsack for all of this.


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## jewels_mystery (Jan 17, 2010)

littlefairywren said:


> I totally get that too. Of course my reaction in the car did not help matters, on our first date. But he was like a glass of water, and I was the man crawling on the sand in the desert...you know what I am saying.
> 
> Either way, the whole physical thing stresses me out.



Your reaction in the car has nothing to do with it! He should have at least brought up the subject to see what you were thinking.


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## littlefairywren (Jan 17, 2010)

Green Eyed Fairy said:


> It IS hard to step back into it....not only has the world around you changed but so have YOU. Biggest difference? The way I meet some men.....hence, my "screening" methods had to change.
> It's like riding a bike though......clumsy and some falls at first....but it gets smoother over time and with practice



Thanks GEF 




jewels_mystery said:


> Your reaction in the car has nothing to do with it! He should have at least brought up the subject to see what you were thinking.



Gosh jewels_mystery, I could kiss you for that. I have been so angry at myself about the date, and over what I did wrong. Or how I could have handled things better. (((HUGS)))


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## Lovelyone (Jan 17, 2010)

Green Eyed Fairy said:


> This sounds wonderful Terri. Are you going to be going out again?



possibly. *smiles sheepishly.


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## jewels_mystery (Jan 17, 2010)

littlefairywren said:


> Thanks GEF
> 
> 
> 
> ...



awww But its true. You are only responsible for YOUR behavior, not HIS. Please stop being angry. Just because you got frisky does not mean you gave him a permanent green light for other things. (((HUGS)))


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## LovelyLiz (Jan 17, 2010)

jewels_mystery said:


> awww But its true. You are only responsible for YOUR behavior, not HIS. Please stop being angry. Just because you got frisky does not mean you gave him a permanent green light for other things. (((HUGS)))



YES! Very well put. Totally agree! And I needed to hear that myself.


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Jan 17, 2010)

intraultra said:


> Oh my, the posts in here thus far are not making me excited about getting back into dating, haha. I haven't had a date recently but I think I'd like to maybe find a date for my birthday (the 31st). So either I could have a wonderful birthday or a terrible one, but at least it won't be boring.
> 
> I decided to revive my profile on a dating site (POF) and since yesterday I've gotten a little over a dozen responses, most of them horrid. I chose the one message that piqued my interest the most and replied. He shut me down because I said I'm not particularly into sports. Isn't that what your buddies are for? Is that really a deal breaker? Lame. Then he said "but if you ever just want to have some fun..." Right. And he had some BS on his profile about being serious about finding someone, blah blah.





mcbeth said:


> Oh, POF...what a mixed bag that place is. What I can't BELIEVE is when men think a message like "I want to lick your tits like cupcakes" or "Nice rack" is actually a good way to strike up a conversation. Like, I am supposed to respond to that in some way?
> 
> I've actually met some interesting people on POF lately, after wading through all the guys who want a hookup or the guys who think asking "What is your favorite color?" is the start of a deep, getting-to-know-you conversation. So hope you find a few good ones in the bunch!



I met my current bf on POF......he messaged me and I liked his profile instantly. He was very straight up about his preferences and what he was looking for.......that honesty was refreshing after all the frustration I felt from talking to other men on there. 
I didn't like his picture to be honest....he was "okay" but the profile held me. Glad I didn't let it deter me from talking to him.....some people just aren't photogenic...which I have discovered in some of the meetings with men off the net. They look much better in person than in the picture. 

And yeah, the opening conversation.....that goes back to that "screening" I mentioned earlier. I have learned if a guy acts like shit and smells like shit....then he is shit. He isn't changing. Don't chalk it up to him being nervous or inexperienced.....chalk it up to exactly what it looks like.....and act accordingly. 

My personal favorite was the 37 year old guy that talked like "u r hot" in his PM. He then told me he has his own place.....I consider a man that is almost 40 years old not living with his Mom a given...not a gift. My response when he told me that? I said "Wow....I do, too"  
I then put a line in my profile to run that type off. I said "I work full time, pay all my bills/debts on time, have my own place and support my children. Any man I would consider dating should be able to say the same." Lol, that sure cut down on some of my responses   
Quality over quantity.....

I have met some nice men from the net in this past year and a half of looking- some I met on CL and some from dating sites. I now have a nice friendship with one guy I dated and we decided we weren't exactly what each other was looking for in a romantic relationship. 

Lots of jerks to be found out there......just keep wading....there are good ones, too. 

Those guys that want you to be into sports? I always see them as wanting someone to do exactly everything they want.....never willing to make a compromise to be with a woman. I ixnay those quick after rolling my eyes.....I don't even bother to finish reading the profile if I read something along those lines of wanting a woman to go hunting, fishing, sport events all the time. I don't insist on a guy to take me out shopping or to do my hair so fair is fair.....

Be wary of those guys that want to push for "cam time" or nude pictures. I don't like ones that only have a couple of pictures to show of themselves yet seem to constantly push for more of me.....and don't seem interested in anything else about me other than how I look. 
I view a lot of those as guys not really interested in "dating". They are probably married/in a relationship and just want some woman on the net to masturbate with on the sly. 
I prefer more of a return than that for my time. 

I have met plenty of "e-men" in my time.....and hold out for a real one any day. If they push for pictures or cam time and never seem interested in arranging a genuine in the flesh meet up, I just block and delete them. I don't owe them shit......even though some seem to think they are doing me some great favor to ask me for jack off materials. 



free2beme04 said:


> I really want to punch my gender in the ballsack for all of this.



Why? Just being you is enough to disspell it.....I ALWAYS remember the good ones over the bad ones  

I'm guessing it's the same for some other women.....it's the good guys that keep us trying and not allowing the duds to define our life outlook. 



jewels_mystery said:


> awww But its true. You are only responsible for YOUR behavior, not HIS. Please stop being angry. Just because you got frisky does not mean you gave him a permanent green light for other things. (((HUGS)))



Indeed....she is right. He should have had a conversation with you first instead of ASSUMING. That's always been my least favorite thing about men in the dating world....their ASSUMPTIONS. :doh:


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## thatgirl08 (Jan 17, 2010)

So, the guy I was supposed to go on a date with? Yeah, he cancelled on me.. supposedly got called into work.. I can't decide if I think he's lying or not but I'm still irritated.. I got up early and shaved my legs for nothing!


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## JMCGB (Jan 17, 2010)

intraultra said:


> Oh my, the posts in here thus far are not making me excited about getting back into dating, haha. I haven't had a date recently but I think I'd like to maybe find a date for my birthday (the 31st). So either I could have a wonderful birthday or a terrible one, but at least it won't be boring.
> 
> I decided to revive my profile on a dating site (POF) and since yesterday I've gotten a little over a dozen responses, most of them horrid. I chose the one message that piqued my interest the most and replied. He shut me down because I said I'm not particularly into sports. Isn't that what your buddies are for? Is that really a deal breaker? Lame. Then he said "but if you ever just want to have some fun..." Right. And he had some BS on his profile about being serious about finding someone, blah blah.




If you don't find a date for your bday let me know. I will drive up for that.


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## FatAndProud (Jan 17, 2010)

I don't really date guys. I have a hard time because I'm shy and it feels awkward. To top it off, I'm fat and the guys into fat girls are shy as well. I am ready to be a 50yo cat lady. I like cats


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## steely (Jan 17, 2010)

FatAndProud said:


> I don't really date guys. I have a hard time because I'm shy and it feels awkward. To top it off, I'm fat and the guys into fat girls are shy as well. I am ready to be a 50yo cat lady. I like cats



 Please join me, reading this thread has convinced me to crawl in hole for the remainder of my life.
steely, henceforth known as the crazy cat lady!


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## steely (Jan 17, 2010)

thatgirl08 said:


> So, the guy I was supposed to go on a date with? Yeah, he cancelled on me.. supposedly got called into work.. I can't decide if I think he's lying or not but I'm still irritated.. I got up early and shaved my legs for nothing!



Awww, man, I really hate to hear that... I hate shaving my legs for no reason. Hopefully, you can reschedule.


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## Jes (Jan 17, 2010)

steely said:


> I confess the thought of having to do the "dating" thing at some point, terrifies me and really leads me to believe I will forever be alone. This thread is hammering that home very well.


Steely (and everyone): while there are many bad dates out there, and many bad people with whom to go on a date, there are also just neutral dates (nice enough person, but no click or spark--which, let's remember, does NOT equal a Bad Date). And the bad dates thread is about just that: bad dates. Not good dates or neutral dates. So please don't assume every date is, or will be, bad. Everyone has had a bad date, a bad job, a bad haircut and a bad bowl of pad thai, but I'd argue most people have had more better dates, jobs, haircuts and bowls of pad thai than not. Threads like this exist to point out and laugh about the extremes. An extreme necessitates the existence of a whole bunch of stuff that's much more tame, or it wouldn't be an extreme. Right? Right!


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## steely (Jan 17, 2010)

Jes said:


> Steely (and everyone): while there are many bad dates out there, and many bad people with whom to go on a date, there are also just neutral dates (nice enough person, but no click or spark--which, let's remember, does NOT equal a Bad Date). And the bad dates thread is about just that: bad dates. Not good dates or neutral dates. So please don't assume every date is, or will be, bad. Everyone has had a bad date, a bad job, a bad haircut and a bad bowl of pad thai, but I'd argue most people have had more better dates, jobs, haircuts and bowls of pad thai than not. Threads like this exist to point out and laugh about the extremes. An extreme necessitates the existence of a whole bunch of stuff that's much more tame, or it wouldn't be an extreme. Right? Right!



I really was just teasing, I'm not ready to date so soon. It just seems that the negatives of dating always seem to outweigh the positives. Way back when, my dating life was hardly conventional and was not all that pleasant. The thought of having to go through all that again at my age is a bit overwhelming. I'm sure somewhere in time I will find a nice friendly man and perhaps we can go from there.


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## LoveBHMS (Jan 17, 2010)

thatgirl08 said:


> So, the guy I was supposed to go on a date with? Yeah, he cancelled on me.. supposedly got called into work.. I can't decide if I think he's lying or not but I'm still irritated.. I got up early and shaved my legs for nothing!



He's a loser and doesn't know what he's missing.


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## Melli-girl (Jan 17, 2010)

well, sadly -- the last few "Dates" that I have had involved a rented movie and pizza. sigh. 

The funniest movie I went on fairly recently:

This guy practically insisted that we go out on thursday night-- which was fine.. (it was a first date). We decided on dinner and a move. I told him what movie I wanted to see-- and he (not so politely) refused-- he wanted to go to see another movie-- at the dollar theatre-- and said-- since he was paying-- he got to call the shots. Wellll............. I'm not exactly the kind of girl to take that... so I said-- fine-- I will pay for the movie-- you pay for dinner. He said-- fine. Then we can see what you want to see. At this point, I was a little annoyed at his attitude, and probably should have refused the date-- but I went along. I told him I would meet him at the theatre-- so I get to the theatre-- and get out tickets-- he is 10 minutes late-- i'm assuming to ensure that I didbuy the tickets. 
**The dude shows up with clothes that are WAAAAY too young for him... I mean-- WAY. I sort of chuckled to myself thinking--this is THE first and last date with this fella, I can tell already-- he is an idiot. 
So-- I decide to get a soda-- and again-- i pay for it. He says-- i dont want anything-- and as i get to the counter-- he says-- no-- get me a blah blah blah. I started laughing. idiooooot.
Then -- we get in the theatre-- and he say-- "im picking the seats" my response: fine dude- whatever gets us through this night. hahaha
after the movie.... he says-- im starving-- i have to eat right this second. Where is someplace cheap........ 
hahahah-- I'm thinking-- ok-- this is the first date-- you want taco hell?????? and i just bought us 25 dollar movie tickets? are you outside of your head?????? so-- we go to taco hell-- because as this point-- im laughing soooo hard at him-- i'm waiting tosee what he will do next. 
Homeboy wolfs down his food. I politely refused-- at this point wasnt even hungry.... and then he proceeds to try to shove his nasty Taco hell tongue down my throat. I pulled away from him every single time.. and finally I said-- let me take you back to your car (ya-- i drove). 
The next day I get a text: are you ever going to say hello to me today, had a great time with you last night-- cant wait to see you again. 
ME: i do not respond
Him: I guess you didn't like my kisses
ME: no, I prefer not to have your tongue down my throat at the end of an already bad evening. 
Him: so, you don't like me???
Me: lol. what else can I really say here- other than -- good luck. 

**now-- after having said all this-- if the dude was short of cash-- thats ALL he had to say: Melli- i'm low on funds, can we do this another time, can we do something that is lower key-- whatever. I would have appreciated that SOOO MUCH. Instead, he acted like a Jack arse with a baaaaad attitude. HOWEVER -- he left me with this t-shirt:

"I went out with this dumb dude and all I got was this lousy t-shirt" (j/k)

THE END.


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## Melli-girl (Jan 17, 2010)

and.. FYI: I think I'm a cool chick-- and a fairly descent catch. Even after all this-- I know that there is a cool guy, that is going to totally dig me as much as I dig him.... still on the search.


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## littlefairywren (Jan 17, 2010)

Melli-girl said:


> and.. FYI: I think I'm a cool chick-- and a fairly descent catch. Even after all this-- I know that there is a cool guy, that is going to totally dig me as much as I dig him.... still on the search.



I love your positive attitude! 
That guy was a total peckerhead! LOL..."so, you don't like me?"


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Jan 17, 2010)

littlefairywren said:


> I love your positive attitude!
> That guy was a total peckerhead! LOL..."so, you don't like me?"



Yeah he does sound like a pecker head. You're smart to bail.....'cause like I said earlier.....it's all down hill from there.......


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## Jes (Jan 17, 2010)

steely said:


> I really was just teasing, I'm not ready to date so soon. It just seems that the negatives of dating always seem to outweigh the positives. Way back when, my dating life was hardly conventional and was not all that pleasant. The thought of having to go through all that again at my age is a bit overwhelming. I'm sure somewhere in time I will find a nice friendly man and perhaps we can go from there.


Yes, Steely, I wasn't suggesting you get busy with dating. I'm just saying that someday, if you choose to, try to envision the best, not the worst. I think you're awesome.


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## jewels_mystery (Jan 17, 2010)

Melli-girl said:


> well, sadly -- the last few "Dates" that I have had involved a rented movie and pizza. sigh.
> 
> The funniest movie I went on fairly recently:
> 
> ...



Wow your so much better than me. As soon as he went on about being in charge of the movie choice, I would have left. Not that I am saying he should have went broke. But jeez could he at least compromise on the movie?


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## calauria (Jan 17, 2010)

Ok, this is not a date, but just a stupid "come on" from a guy. So, it is the beginning of the summer session at my university. There is this Turkish guy walking past me, looking at me with this dumb looking grin on his face. In my mind I'm asking, "What the hell is he smiling at?" Then he has the nerve to say, "You need to lose weight, man!" I laughed, because I couldn't believe this FOOL just said that, so I laugh and ask, "What?" He repeated, "You need to lose weight." My response was, "Oh." Then, I just started laughing at this fool and trying to get away from him, cuz he still had that ignorant looking grin on his face. Anyway, this fool keeps chattering away about I don't know what and followed me around. That whole summer and during the next semester this dude tried to get me to go out with him. Fool!! Doesn't he know to get a woman to go out with him he doesn't tell her she needs to lose weight!! Damn dude was illiterate in dating!!! Needed to get somewhere and sit his ass down!!! LOL!!!


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## kittencat (Jan 17, 2010)

thats how i go about things too!FTW!were classy dames!good job baby doll


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## kittencat (Jan 17, 2010)

i have not had an official date in a while...but ummmmm i have had 4 people ask me out in the past week so we will see what i do.But the last person i had a date with and saw not too long ago... i ended up getting drunk and kinda sloppy..winner.


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## elle camino (Jan 17, 2010)

Ate delicious mexican food, saw Avatar in 3-D, he walked me home which was sweet since his place is in the way-opposite direction of the theater, so altogether a good time. But meh - no real chemistry. Great guy, funny as heck, friends with a lot of my friends, but pretty much a nonstarter. 
Still, dates are fun.


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## LovelyLiz (Jan 18, 2010)

Jes said:


> Threads like this exist to point out and laugh about the extremes. An extreme necessitates the existence of a whole bunch of stuff that's much more tame, or it wouldn't be an extreme. Right? Right!



Actually, just to clarify, that wasn't exactly what I envisioned for this thread - maybe I didn't explain it well enough. But I would hope that it's a place where people can talk about any and all dates (even if they're just kind of ho-hum). Just as a way for all of us who are trying to be active in the dating world to share about our experiences.


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## kittencat (Jan 18, 2010)

LOL thread fail


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## superherogirl09 (Jan 18, 2010)

The last date I had was this past summer...after about our 5th or 6th date, he informed me that he wasn't looking for a relationship, and since I wasn't willing to sleep with him, he was no longer interested.
Unfortunately, I can't say that was much of a surprise. Being that the majority of potential significant others I meet are only looking for friends with benefits and/or women who look like supermodels, I've pretty much resigned myself to a future as a lonely (albeit self-sufficient and well-educated) crazy cat lady. :doh:


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## Frankie (Jan 18, 2010)

missed point of thread


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## LovelyLiz (Jan 19, 2010)

Frankie said:


> missed point of thread



I don't get why this thread is so ambiguous. The title of the thread is:

Dating: how was your most recent date?

Is that not self-explanatory?


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## thatgirl08 (Jan 19, 2010)

It was for me, for the record.


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## Aust99 (Jan 19, 2010)

mcbeth said:


> I don't get why this thread is so ambiguous. The title of the thread is:
> 
> Dating: how was your most recent date?
> 
> Is that not self-explanatory?




It was for me too.... ummmm... post about your most recent date...

Well... my most recent dates involved a guy who need to be picked up and driven home, who wanted me to do all the running around and then got all offended when I wouldn't go out of my way to come get him for what ultimately was going to be a booty call.... The b*****d flipped it on me like I was the bad guy when I wanted him to show some effort and get himself to the train station to make it a little easier on me... 

HA HA... some men hey!!:doh:

Anyway.. I told him where to go... so, wheres that single thread again??


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## LovelyLiz (Jan 19, 2010)

Aust99 said:


> Well... my most recent dates involved a guy who need to be picked up and driven home, who wanted me to do all the running around and then got all offended when I wouldn't go out of my way to come get him for what ultimately was going to be a booty call.... The b*****d flipped it on me like I was the bad guy when I wanted him to show some effort and get himself to the train station to make it a little easier on me...
> 
> HA HA... some men hey!!:doh:
> 
> Anyway.. I told him where to go... so, wheres that single thread again??



I'm glad you told him where to go. He doesn't even deserve a booty call from you. Serious.

The singles thread is a way more fun place to hang out that with some douchey guy who can't pull his own weight. I'll see ya over there.


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## Aust99 (Jan 19, 2010)

mcbeth said:


> I'm glad you told him where to go. He doesn't even deserve a booty call from you. Serious.
> 
> The singles thread is a way more fun place to hang out that with some douchey guy who can't pull his own weight. I'll see ya over there.



Word!! Just checked in....


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## thatgirl08 (Jan 19, 2010)

So the guy who mysteriously got called into work and had to cancel our date Sunday.. yeah, we rescheduled and yeah, he stood me up. AWESOME. Honestly ladies, if something doesn't sound right it probably isn't.. trust your instincts! Best part is that this asshole is actually a member of Dims.. which is probably why I gave him more benefit of the doubt. No more mercy, swear to god. Also in case any of you happen to be talking to a guy from Rochester, let me know because you do not want to waste your time if it's this guy.. believe me.


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## LoveBHMS (Jan 19, 2010)

thatgirl08 said:


> So the guy who mysteriously got called into work and had to cancel our date Sunday.. yeah, we rescheduled and yeah, he stood me up. AWESOME. Honestly ladies, if something doesn't sound right it probably isn't.. trust your instincts! Best part is that this asshole is actually a member of Dims.. which is probably why I gave him more benefit of the doubt. No more mercy, swear to god. Also in case any of you happen to be talking to a guy from Rochester, let me know because you do not want to waste your time if it's this guy.. believe me.



OMG.

Ok, open letter to Rochester area FA.

Dude. Not only are you effing stupid to give up the chance to go out with a hot SSBBW like her, the mere fact that you have no manners AT ALL that you can't call or even send a text to say "I need to cancel" is a clear indication that you need to lead a crappy celibate life in which every single SSBBW in the entirity of New York State..or even North America stays far clear of you.

You suck. And you're stupid.


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## bigsexy920 (Jan 19, 2010)

this crap sucks and no matter how old you get - it never feels any different than the way you are feeling. 

Im sorry this JA did that to you.



thatgirl08 said:


> So the guy who mysteriously got called into work and had to cancel our date Sunday.. yeah, we rescheduled and yeah, he stood me up. AWESOME. Honestly ladies, if something doesn't sound right it probably isn't.. trust your instincts! Best part is that this asshole is actually a member of Dims.. which is probably why I gave him more benefit of the doubt. No more mercy, swear to god. Also in case any of you happen to be talking to a guy from Rochester, let me know because you do not want to waste your time if it's this guy.. believe me.


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## Frankie (Jan 19, 2010)

mcbeth said:


> I don't get why this thread is so ambiguous. The title of the thread is:
> 
> Dating: how was your most recent date?
> 
> Is that not self-explanatory?



I'm sorry, my edit wasn't clear: I missed the point when I posted about a bad date that happened 10 years ago. As soon as I posted, I realized you were asking for accounts of recent dates, so I hurriedly deleted what I wrote. So, yes, your post was clear. I think I got caught up in the flurry of posts about bad dates.


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## littlefairywren (Jan 19, 2010)

thatgirl08 said:


> So the guy who mysteriously got called into work and had to cancel our date Sunday.. yeah, we rescheduled and yeah, he stood me up. AWESOME. Honestly ladies, if something doesn't sound right it probably isn't.. trust your instincts! Best part is that this asshole is actually a member of Dims.. which is probably why I gave him more benefit of the doubt. No more mercy, swear to god. Also in case any of you happen to be talking to a guy from Rochester, let me know because you do not want to waste your time if it's this guy.. believe me.



Total loser!!
His loss sweetie...don't let that put you off. There is someone out there for you with better class than that guy.


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## thatgirl08 (Jan 19, 2010)

Thanks everyone, I really appreciate it.


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## jewels_mystery (Jan 20, 2010)

thatgirl08 said:


> So the guy who mysteriously got called into work and had to cancel our date Sunday.. yeah, we rescheduled and yeah, he stood me up. AWESOME. Honestly ladies, if something doesn't sound right it probably isn't.. trust your instincts! Best part is that this asshole is actually a member of Dims.. which is probably why I gave him more benefit of the doubt. No more mercy, swear to god. Also in case any of you happen to be talking to a guy from Rochester, let me know because you do not want to waste your time if it's this guy.. believe me.



I am sorry he turned out to be such a spineless wimp. You deserve so much better.


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## thatgirl08 (Jan 20, 2010)

Thanks jewels!

Here's hoping the next guy is better.


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## Inhibited (Jan 20, 2010)

> thatgirl08 said:
> 
> 
> > So the guy who mysteriously got called into work and had to cancel our date Sunday.. yeah, we rescheduled and yeah, he stood me up. AWESOME. Honestly ladies, if something doesn't sound right it probably isn't.. trust your instincts! Best part is that this asshole is actually a member of Dims.. which is probably why I gave him more benefit of the doubt. No more mercy, swear to god. Also in case any of you happen to be talking to a guy from Rochester, let me know because you do not want to waste your time if it's this guy.. believe me.



His lucky your not mean as you could easily out him...


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## thatgirl08 (Jan 20, 2010)

Inhibited said:


> His lucky your not mean as you could easily out him...



Honestly, I only didn't because I'm not sure of the policy regarding that on here (although with his like 5 posts he's not exactly an active member) but contact me in PM or elsewhere and I have no problems with sharing his username. It's not about a vendetta, I just honestly don't want other girls to end up wasting their time with him.


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## Knoxz (Jan 20, 2010)

Terrible, I didn't even get any


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## LovelyLiz (Jan 20, 2010)

Knoxz said:


> Terrible, I didn't even get any



Now tell us what you _really_ think.


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## intraultra (Jan 22, 2010)

mcbeth said:


> Oh, POF...what a mixed bag that place is. What I can't BELIEVE is when men think a message like "I want to lick your tits like cupcakes" or "Nice rack" is actually a good way to strike up a conversation. Like, I am supposed to respond to that in some way?
> 
> I've actually met some interesting people on POF lately, after wading through all the guys who want a hookup or the guys who think asking "What is your favorite color?" is the start of a deep, getting-to-know-you conversation. So hope you find a few good ones in the bunch!


Thank you. Yeah, I have yet to find another person worth talking to on there. Pretty much all I've been getting are one-line messages in chat speak. If they don't care enough to put thought into their initial message, then I certainly don't care enough to bother replying at all. The fact that you've found some interesting people gives me hope though!



Green Eyed Fairy said:


> I met my current bf on POF...... [snipped awesome post]


Seriously, thanks so much for this! _Lots_ of good info to keep in mind. I'm actually going to update my profile because of what you said...I'm sick of all of the thoughtless messages. Quality over quantity indeed.



JMCGB said:


> If you don't find a date for your bday let me know. I will drive up for that.


:wubu:


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## Tau (Jan 22, 2010)

My last date was ugh! The guys's profile sounded like perfection. He's a forensic something or other - in my head I just saw DEXTER - origninally from SA but living and working in the UK. He told me he was here on a case with the South African Police. He claimed to love nature, lots of pets, he was physically perfect and not too far out of my age requirment at 42. When we met he was seriously dreamy dudes, all clean cut and gloriously dressed. In his favour he paid for everything! and had his own transport but...sigh. The conversation revolved around him,him,him. Dude spent an hour talking about his hobbies, his sports, his issues, his music. When he even asked me anything it was:
What cup size are you? and I want 4 children, do you think you could physically handle carrying and giving birth to 4 chidlren?

I was in shock - seriously I just couldnt believe this person. When we got done and I said goodbye he was like: You're not coming home with me?? Like shocked that I wasn't just going to roll over with my legs open. I blinked at him and walked away quickly.

I have another date set for the 6th of Feb - my soul needed some recovery time after this one :doh:


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## littlefairywren (Jan 22, 2010)

Tau said:


> My last date was ugh! The guys's profile sounded like perfection. He's a forensic something or other - in my head I just saw DEXTER - origninally from SA but living and working in the UK. He told me he was here on a case with the South African Police. He claimed to love nature, lots of pets, he was physically perfect and not too far out of my age requirment at 42. When we met he was seriously dreamy dudes, all clean cut and gloriously dressed. In his favour he paid for everything! and had his own transport but...sigh. The conversation revolved around him,him,him. Dude spent an hour talking about his hobbies, his sports, his issues, his music. When he even asked me anything it was:
> What cup size are you? and I want 4 children, do you think you could physically handle carrying and giving birth to 4 chidlren?
> 
> I was in shock - seriously I just couldnt believe this person. When we got done and I said goodbye he was like: You're not coming home with me?? Like shocked that I wasn't just going to roll over with my legs open. I blinked at him and walked away quickly.
> ...



I would SO want do more than blink at him. What a total cretin!! (((hugs Tau)))
Here's hoping the next date is a perfect one


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## steely (Jan 22, 2010)

thatgirl08 said:


> So the guy who mysteriously got called into work and had to cancel our date Sunday.. yeah, we rescheduled and yeah, he stood me up. AWESOME. Honestly ladies, if something doesn't sound right it probably isn't.. trust your instincts! Best part is that this asshole is actually a member of Dims.. which is probably why I gave him more benefit of the doubt. No more mercy, swear to god. Also in case any of you happen to be talking to a guy from Rochester, let me know because you do not want to waste your time if it's this guy.. believe me.



I'm sorry, I really hate that happened.


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## steely (Jan 22, 2010)

Tau said:


> My last date was ugh! The guys's profile sounded like perfection. He's a forensic something or other - in my head I just saw DEXTER - origninally from SA but living and working in the UK. He told me he was here on a case with the South African Police. He claimed to love nature, lots of pets, he was physically perfect and not too far out of my age requirment at 42. When we met he was seriously dreamy dudes, all clean cut and gloriously dressed. In his favour he paid for everything! and had his own transport but...sigh. The conversation revolved around him,him,him. Dude spent an hour talking about his hobbies, his sports, his issues, his music. When he even asked me anything it was:
> What cup size are you? and I want 4 children, do you think you could physically handle carrying and giving birth to 4 chidlren?
> 
> I was in shock - seriously I just couldnt believe this person. When we got done and I said goodbye he was like: You're not coming home with me?? Like shocked that I wasn't just going to roll over with my legs open. I blinked at him and walked away quickly.
> ...



I should say, your soul did need recovery. (((( Tau ))))


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## Weirdo890 (Jan 22, 2010)

Tau said:


> My last date was ugh! The guys's profile sounded like perfection. He's a forensic something or other - in my head I just saw DEXTER - origninally from SA but living and working in the UK. He told me he was here on a case with the South African Police. He claimed to love nature, lots of pets, he was physically perfect and not too far out of my age requirment at 42. When we met he was seriously dreamy dudes, all clean cut and gloriously dressed. In his favour he paid for everything! and had his own transport but...sigh. The conversation revolved around him,him,him. Dude spent an hour talking about his hobbies, his sports, his issues, his music. When he even asked me anything it was:
> What cup size are you? and I want 4 children, do you think you could physically handle carrying and giving birth to 4 chidlren?
> 
> I was in shock - seriously I just couldnt believe this person. When we got done and I said goodbye he was like: You're not coming home with me?? Like shocked that I wasn't just going to roll over with my legs open. I blinked at him and walked away quickly.
> ...



What....? He said WHAT!?


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## LovelyLiz (Jan 23, 2010)

Just got home from my first date of 2010. It was someone I just met on POF TODAY, and he was in my same city, so I figured, why not? We met for happy hour, had a few drinks and appetizers, and then hung out a bit after that... He sat next to me in the booth, and we cuddled a bit, and had some nice affection in the car after that. But it was a little weird at the very beginning, because I swear we spent 20 minutes with him defending himself about how he doesn't have his bachelor's degree, and him repeating how I'm working on my PhD. The thing is, I didn't even bring up the PhD thing or education at all - it was listed in my POF profile, but I honestly don't care about formal education that much. But he lost his job a couple months ago, and I think he was under this impression like I have it all together (ha!) and he felt like he didn't. So that hung a cloud over things a bit. 

But I was very straight up with him and said I really care more about whether the person has good character, and whether we hit it off, and I don't care at all about formal education because we all have different strengths, etc. (I seriously believe that.) So the weird thing that happened later, was that after he got VERY relaxed...and we were in the car, he started going off about how he can't date right now and he needs to focus on himself and get his life together and whatnot. I felt bad for the guy, honestly. He really seems to be going through something.

The reality is, I didn't forsee he and I having any kind of long-term relationship anyway. But we did have an enjoyable night together, and he called me sexy a BUNCH of times, so you can't really go wrong with that. It's not long-term love, but it was a pretty fun evening.


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## LovelyLiz (Jan 23, 2010)

Okay, now that I'm not still buzzed and amorous like I was when I posted that convoluted story of my date when I got home last night, I will just give the part that I think really matters.

He was a sweet, affirming, respectful guy with a lot of integrity. Plus, he was smoking hot and we had great chemistry. It felt really awesome for him to say over and over how he thought I was "sexy as hell" and to touch my leg and cuddle up with me in the restaurant booth. He did say he was definitely into big women, and that he just knew what he liked. And even though I didn't feel like we would really make a great couple, and he realized he really wasn't ready to start dating until he got his life in order, it was still a really fun evening for both of us. 

So there are good men out there - even on POF! Even though it wasn't a match, he really was a good guy, and it was still an encouraging and fun-filled evening.


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## thatgirl08 (Jan 23, 2010)

I'm glad you still enjoyed the date! It's refreshing to hear a story about a good date.. it seems like we've all been on bad ones lately. :/


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## Gspoon (Jan 23, 2010)

Well, I don't know if you can really count it as a date as much as it was an outting with a lovely girl. So, in the long run, if I consider the day with said lovely girl was a date, then it was awesome


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## littlefairywren (Jan 23, 2010)

mcbeth said:


> Okay, now that I'm not still buzzed and amorous like I was when I posted that convoluted story of my date when I got home last night, I will just give the part that I think really matters.
> 
> He was a sweet, affirming, respectful guy with a lot of integrity. Plus, he was smoking hot and we had great chemistry. It felt really awesome for him to say over and over how he thought I was "sexy as hell" and to touch my leg and cuddle up with me in the restaurant booth. He did say he was definitely into big women, and that he just knew what he liked. And even though I didn't feel like we would really make a great couple, and he realized he really wasn't ready to start dating until he got his life in order, it was still a really fun evening for both of us.
> 
> So there are good men out there - even on POF! Even though it wasn't a match, he really was a good guy, and it was still an encouraging and fun-filled evening.



Thank goodness.....so there is a light at the end of the dating tunnel after all. This sounds like a good start. Glad it went well mcbeth


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## steely (Jan 23, 2010)

mcbeth said:


> Okay, now that I'm not still buzzed and amorous like I was when I posted that convoluted story of my date when I got home last night, I will just give the part that I think really matters.
> 
> He was a sweet, affirming, respectful guy with a lot of integrity. Plus, he was smoking hot and we had great chemistry. It felt really awesome for him to say over and over how he thought I was "sexy as hell" and to touch my leg and cuddle up with me in the restaurant booth. He did say he was definitely into big women, and that he just knew what he liked. And even though I didn't feel like we would really make a great couple, and he realized he really wasn't ready to start dating until he got his life in order, it was still a really fun evening for both of us.
> 
> So there are good men out there - even on POF! Even though it wasn't a match, he really was a good guy, and it was still an encouraging and fun-filled evening.



 This is good to know!


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## thatgirl08 (Jan 24, 2010)

This isn't about a specific date but the process in general.. I am so goddamn sick and tired of all the FA's who think they know what it's like to be a fat woman and how gaining weight would look and affect the woman.. like okay when you get a vagina and gain 200 pounds, get back to me.


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## Tau (Jan 24, 2010)

mcbeth said:


> Okay, now that I'm not still buzzed and amorous like I was when I posted that convoluted story of my date when I got home last night, I will just give the part that I think really matters.
> 
> He was a sweet, affirming, respectful guy with a lot of integrity. Plus, he was smoking hot and we had great chemistry. It felt really awesome for him to say over and over how he thought I was "sexy as hell" and to touch my leg and cuddle up with me in the restaurant booth. He did say he was definitely into big women, and that he just knew what he liked. And even though I didn't feel like we would really make a great couple, and he realized he really wasn't ready to start dating until he got his life in order, it was still a really fun evening for both of us.
> 
> So there are good men out there - even on POF! Even though it wasn't a match, he really was a good guy, and it was still an encouraging and fun-filled evening.



I'm really glad you had a good time. It really is good to hear positive date stories.


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## Tau (Jan 24, 2010)

@FairyWren and Steely -thanks ladies - I'm feeling a great deal more rejuvenated 

@Weirdo - I KNOW RIGHT!!!! There are some truly horrendous people in the world out there!


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## LovelyLiz (Jan 24, 2010)

littlefairywren said:


> Thank goodness.....so there is a light at the end of the dating tunnel after all. This sounds like a good start. Glad it went well mcbeth





steely said:


> This is good to know!





thatgirl08 said:


> I'm glad you still enjoyed the date! It's refreshing to hear a story about a good date.. it seems like we've all been on bad ones lately. :/





Tau said:


> I'm really glad you had a good time. It really is good to hear positive date stories.



Thanks, ladies...me too! Finding a kind, sane (hot! ) guy in the mess of crazies in the online dating world gives me the encouragement to keep sorting through all the other guys on there for a bit longer... 

I'm really just trying to date more, to get practice with it, and be open to people. Having this thread to post in makes me feel accountable somehow, since dating can be a scary, nerve-wracking proposition. Even when I went on that date, I remember thinking, "Well, no matter how it goes, good or bad, I can post about it in Dims and get the support of some amazing women." And I did.  Thanks again, guys.


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## bmann0413 (Jan 25, 2010)

I've never been on a date before. I might not know what to do when the chance arises either.


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Jan 25, 2010)

thatgirl08 said:


> So the guy who mysteriously got called into work and had to cancel our date Sunday.. yeah, we rescheduled and yeah, he stood me up. AWESOME. *Honestly ladies, if something doesn't sound right it probably isn't.. trust your instincts! *Best part is that this asshole is actually a member of Dims.. which is probably why I gave him more benefit of the doubt. *No more mercy, swear to god.* Also in case any of you happen to be talking to a guy from Rochester, let me know because you do not want to waste your time if it's this guy.. believe me.




The whole dating scene got better for me when I adopted that attitude. Perhaps it was just that I felt better about and in more control of myself? 
Whatever it was, I started being quick to end convos and stop wasting my time on jerks, realizing if THAT is the kind of first impression they make, then it's nowhere but downhill from there. 

That being said, I might have given the benefit of the doubt, too, if it was someone I had met here.

Now you know......


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## thatgirl08 (Jan 25, 2010)

Green Eyed Fairy said:


> The whole dating scene got better for me when I adopted that attitude. Perhaps it was just that I felt better about and in more control of myself?
> Whatever it was, I started being quick to end convos and stop wasting my time on jerks, realizing if THAT is the kind of first impression they make, then it's nowhere but downhill from there.
> 
> That being said, I might have given the benefit of the doubt, too, if it was someone I had met here.
> ...



Yeah, absolutely. I'm not going to bother to waste my time on people because 99/100 times my first impression is right.


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## LovelyLiz (Jan 27, 2010)

Went on another date today - met a new guy from POF for coffee. (I honestly can't believe it. That's 2 dates in less than a week! That's probably the same number of dates I went on during all of last year!) He had a sexy Scottish accent, and we had an okay time talking, but nothing really awesome, we didn't have that sense of really "clicking" or anything. He actually seemed kind of angry - and still carrying a lot of pain from his divorce (which will be finalized in about a month). Couldn't really tell if he was interested, and not sure I'm interested either, but he said he'd email me and maybe we could get together next week. 

If he indeed does email me/contact me, I will probably go out with him another time just to see how much of the negativity was first-date jitters, and how much is really part of his personality. I have a feeling we're not compatible, but it can't hurt to hang out again just be be sure, I guess.


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## thatgirl08 (Jan 27, 2010)

At least it went okay! I'd try the second date too if I were in that situation. Sometimes I think people just don't know what to talk about so they start blabbing about their ex without even realizing how angry or bitter they seem and stuff, you know. Good luck with the second date if it happens! :]


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## littlefairywren (Jan 27, 2010)

mcbeth said:


> Went on another date today - met a new guy from POF for coffee. (I honestly can't believe it. That's 2 dates in less than a week! That's probably the same number of dates I went on during all of last year!) He had a sexy Scottish accent, and we had an okay time talking, but nothing really awesome, we didn't have that sense of really "clicking" or anything. He actually seemed kind of angry - and still carrying a lot of pain from his divorce (which will be finalized in about a month). Couldn't really tell if he was interested, and not sure I'm interested either, but he said he'd email me and maybe we could get together next week.
> 
> If he indeed does email me/contact me, I will probably go out with him another time just to see how much of the negativity was first-date jitters, and how much is really part of his personality. I have a feeling we're not compatible, but it can't hurt to hang out again just be be sure, I guess.



At least it was not a total fizzer....and yeah he could have been having a bad moment I suppose.

I agree with thatgirl08, go on a second date if he asks. Besides, just to listen to a sexy Scottish accent may be worth it. I love them


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## LovelyLiz (Jan 27, 2010)

thatgirl08 said:


> At least it went okay! I'd try the second date too if I were in that situation. Sometimes I think people just don't know what to talk about so they start blabbing about their ex without even realizing how angry or bitter they seem and stuff, you know. Good luck with the second date if it happens! :]



Thanks!!! Yeah, I actually had a nightmare about it last night based on this thread. It was way better than the nightmare, anyway! 

Plus, he has beautiful dogs, and I'm hoping if we go out again we can take the dogs out for a walk on the beach or something. But, him saying we should meet up again might have just been trying to be nice. So, who knows if it will happen. But I'm encouraged that you would go out with him again in the same situation -- sometimes it's hard to decide. But I figure, when it doubt, give it more time.


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## LovelyLiz (Jan 27, 2010)

littlefairywren said:


> At least it was not a total fizzer....and yeah he could have been having a bad moment I suppose.
> 
> I agree with thatgirl08, go on a second date if he asks. Besides, just to listen to a sexy Scottish accent may be worth it. I love them



Oh great! With 2 of you in agreement, that settles it.  And yes, the accent was nice. At times I realized I wasn't listening to his words and just enjoying the way he talked..lol.

Thanks LFW, you are awesome.


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## steely (Jan 27, 2010)

mcbeth said:


> Went on another date today - met a new guy from POF for coffee. (I honestly can't believe it. That's 2 dates in less than a week! That's probably the same number of dates I went on during all of last year!) He had a sexy Scottish accent, and we had an okay time talking, but nothing really awesome, we didn't have that sense of really "clicking" or anything. He actually seemed kind of angry - and still carrying a lot of pain from his divorce (which will be finalized in about a month). Couldn't really tell if he was interested, and not sure I'm interested either, but he said he'd email me and maybe we could get together next week.
> 
> If he indeed does email me/contact me, I will probably go out with him another time just to see how much of the negativity was first-date jitters, and how much is really part of his personality. I have a feeling we're not compatible, but it can't hurt to hang out again just be be sure, I guess.



I'm glad to hear this, it sounds like a nice time. The accent alone would have hooked me. I love an accent!


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## LovelyLiz (Jan 30, 2010)

Okay, so, I realize I'm hijacking this thread a lot lately...but I have been a DATING MACHINE! Seriously, this was my 3rd date (all different guys) in basically a week. 2010 is out of control!

Tonight I had a nice date, just had some tea and conversation, nothing crazy, with another guy from POF. Honestly, I was kind of nervous about it because he is a doctor (like medical doctor) and as a fat woman I have had some really bad experiences with doctors. Part of me was even like, what if he is asking me out to give me some kind of lecture about food or health or something? I know, I'm a lunatic.

Anyway, we actually had a really nice conversation overall, and had some good areas of overlap in terms of interests and stuff. He was a pretty good listener too, and asked good questions, which is awesome. He's about 13 years older than me, which was a bit weird at first, but I got over it. I've hung out with other guys around his age before, but he seemed older for some reason (I don't think he was lying about his age, tho).

He got my email, sent me an email from his phone, we had a hug, and it seems pretty likely we'll go out again.

(Plus, I googled his email address just now, and in the midst of a bunch of reputable sites was some comment he made a few years ago on a big girl porn site. Maybe that should make me feel worse? But it makes me feel better. )


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## littlefairywren (Jan 30, 2010)

Ooh mcbeth....this sounds promising! Including what you found when you googled his address. I would be kinda pleased myself 

I am so glad I am not the only one who does that (google a guy), even though it makes me feel like a stalker. 
But when you think you like the sound of a guy, and you find out he belongs to a site called "Hot Prostitutes in Your Area"......it is a handy tool!!


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## Inhibited (Jan 30, 2010)

lmao am gonna do this next time i meet someone, i mean i have googled my own name but never anyone else..


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## jewels_mystery (Jan 30, 2010)

mcbeth said:


> Okay, so, I realize I'm hijacking this thread a lot lately...but I have been a DATING MACHINE! Seriously, this was my 3rd date (all different guys) in basically a week. 2010 is out of control!
> 
> Tonight I had a nice date, just had some tea and conversation, nothing crazy, with another guy from POF. Honestly, I was kind of nervous about it because he is a doctor (like medical doctor) and as a fat woman I have had some really bad experiences with doctors. Part of me was even like, what if he is asking me out to give me some kind of lecture about food or health or something? I know, I'm a lunatic.
> 
> ...



YAY I am happy for you. I also goodle the email and name. Plus check out the inmate locator. lol


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## LovelyLiz (Jan 30, 2010)

jewels_mystery said:


> YAY I am happy for you. I also goodle the email and name. Plus check out the inmate locator. lol



Ha! Inmate locator...awesome.

And, no joke, I think I'm going on another date tonight. With another guy. This is the last guy from the guys I had been talking to on POF (okay, there's one other, but he seems super lazy and is showing NO initiative in asking me to actually meet).

So, we'll see. I'm getting a little tired from all these first dates. This will be the 4th in 8 days. I need a break.


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## thatgirl08 (Jan 30, 2010)

Good luck girl!


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## LovelyLiz (Jan 31, 2010)

thatgirl08 said:


> Good luck girl!



Thank you 

Unfortunately, it really did not go well. I'm not going to go into a ton of details, but let's just say he talked about himself the WHOLE time, accepted my offer to split the bill (I know, it's the 21st Century and all, but it still surprised me), and it was just really, really not a fun experience. 

Here's hoping I can go out with bachelor #3 again. I at least had a nice time with him.


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## thatgirl08 (Jan 31, 2010)

Aw I'm sorry it didn't go well!


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## littlefairywren (Jan 31, 2010)

mcbeth said:


> Thank you
> 
> Unfortunately, it really did not go well. I'm not going to go into a ton of details, but let's just say he talked about himself the WHOLE time, accepted my offer to split the bill (I know, it's the 21st Century and all, but it still surprised me), and it was just really, really not a fun experience.
> 
> Here's hoping I can go out with bachelor #3 again. I at least had a nice time with him.



Oh poop, I was hoping for a good date story mcbeth....sorry he was a dud. Crossing my fingers for you, with bachelor #3


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## LovelyLiz (Jan 31, 2010)

thatgirl08 said:


> Aw I'm sorry it didn't go well!





littlefairywren said:


> Oh poop, I was hoping for a good date story mcbeth....sorry he was a dud. Crossing my fingers for you, with bachelor #3



Thanks so much, Rachel and LFW. 

You know, dating is tiring, and can really take its toll on my self-esteem. I didn't really click with 3 of the 4 guys I went out with, and in the midst of that it can just be hard to hang onto hope that there will be someone I *can* click with. But I think after I take a break and do some internally nourishing activities, I'll be ready to get back out there. Right now though, me and my self-esteem need to take a little break.


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Jan 31, 2010)

mcbeth said:


> Thanks so much, Rachel and LFW.
> 
> You know, dating is tiring, and can really take its toll on my self-esteem. I didn't really click with 3 of the 4 guys I went out with, and in the midst of that it can just be hard to hang onto hope that there will be someone I *can* click with. But I think after I take a break and do some internally nourishing activities, I'll be ready to get back out there. Right now though, me and my self-esteem need to take a little break.



I did that three dates in a week thing myself- and clicked with none either. It IS tiring......

It took me a year and a half of trying to find my bf- and I considered giving up or "stopping for a while" several times. 

The right person is worth the wait is what I kept reminding myself of- and it's true  

There is nothing wrong with you. Apparently a lot of people find you attractive - but attraction doesn't make anyone the RIGHT person for YOU. Hold out- you're worth it.


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## LovelyLiz (Feb 1, 2010)

Green Eyed Fairy said:


> I did that three dates in a week thing myself- and clicked with none either. It IS tiring......
> 
> It took me a year and a half of trying to find my bf- and I considered giving up or "stopping for a while" several times.
> 
> ...



Thank you so much for this. You mention several things that I need to keep in mind, but that I often forget. I really appreciate the kind words, GEF.


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## kayrae (Feb 1, 2010)

i'd like to post on this thread, but i don't really date much. i'm picky picky picky. kudos to all of you who aren't giving up on love :wubu:


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## LovelyLiz (Feb 1, 2010)

kayrae said:


> i'd like to post on this thread, but i don't really date much. i'm picky picky picky. kudos to all of you who aren't giving up on love :wubu:



Yeah, I hear you. What kinds of things are you most picky about? 

At the moment my goal is to be open to all different kinds of guys (at least the ones who don't seem to be obviously looking for sex), because I just want to get some more practice dating and being open to men and their individuality and the mixture of plusses and minuses that entails (for all of us). But for me it's a constant work of adjusting the filter - how to make it wide enough that I don't cut out potential guys that might be a good fit, but narrow enough that I'm not wasting my time with a bunch of jerks.



mcbeth said:


> accepted my offer to split the bill (I know, it's the 21st Century and all, but it still surprised me)



I wanted to clarify this so I don't come off like some kind of entitled jerk. I totally don't expect a man to always pay for me, and especially if I offer to pay, I'm fine with him accepting that offer. In this case tho, he *ordered* for me (we were having margaritas) and he ordered a premium tequila for the drinks instead of the normal variety. Now, if I knew I was going to be paying for my own drink, I would never have wanted the premium (and way more expensive) brand. So that was the annoying part. (But honestly, in the scheme of the terribleness of the overall conversation, the part about the bill was just the cherry on top of the rancid sundae.)


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## smithnwesson (Feb 1, 2010)

If I told ya'll, you wouldn't fucken believe it.


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## wittymoniker (Feb 1, 2010)

BTW...love this thread....its like an inside view of peoples lives.

I had an interesting date Friday night. Totally blind date and had only talked once on the phone, so this was legit like the first time we had seen each other. No pictures, no descriptions even, so totally in the dark physically.

We met outside and after a bit of banter we moved inside to grab a table at my favorite wine and tapas bar. The conversation started really slow, but once we got started it went all over the place and was really lighthearted and genuine.

Great meal with good wine, and after that we pondered what to do since neither of us wanted to call it a night. We went to a local ice bar which while cliche and too trendy for its own good was actually really fun and a laid back atmosphere. 

So the conversation continues and we talk and share stories and discuss dealbreakers and blah blah blah.

The night comes to an end, and as I walk her to her car I say very confidently that I had a great time and I'd love to see her again, etc. She smiles with what I thought to be sincere flattery and simply replies "look i'm moving in like 2 weeks to New Mexico and I did have fun but I see no point in getting too attached." 

FML

 Oh well....another one in the books. I couldn't even be upset.


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## Saoirse (Feb 1, 2010)

I dont think I'll be dating much this summer, since I was with a guy all last summer and I want to feel free again. Plus I have some awesome Irish festivals to go to... gonna get drunk and hit on all the hot musicians! There's one in particular that gonna feel my naked flesh. haha


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## Tania (Feb 13, 2010)

I just got home from my first date of the weekend. It lasted five hours. We ate. We drank. We laughed. He's cute and funny and sweet and I like him. I guess we'll see.

Tomorrow is another date with a different guy. I'm pretty sure I'll end up really liking him too, but who knows. 

Keep your fingers crossed, guys. :*


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## littlefairywren (Feb 13, 2010)

Tania said:


> I just got home from my first date of the weekend. It lasted five hours. We ate. We drank. We laughed. He's cute and funny and sweet and I like him. I guess we'll see.
> 
> Tomorrow is another date with a different guy. I'm pretty sure I'll end up really liking him too, but who knows.
> 
> Keep your fingers crossed, guys. :*



Oooh, sounds good Tania. Glad it went so well. 
We need some more good dating stories in here!!

Fingers crossed for tomorrow too


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## LovelyLiz (Feb 13, 2010)

Tania said:


> I just got home from my first date of the weekend. It lasted five hours. We ate. We drank. We laughed. He's cute and funny and sweet and I like him. I guess we'll see.
> 
> Tomorrow is another date with a different guy. I'm pretty sure I'll end up really liking him too, but who knows.
> 
> Keep your fingers crossed, guys. :*



Woo-hoo! Sounds like a great evening. Happy for you!

Hope guy #2 is also awesome. Way to rock the dating circuit!


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## steely (Feb 13, 2010)

Tania said:


> I just got home from my first date of the weekend. It lasted five hours. We ate. We drank. We laughed. He's cute and funny and sweet and I like him. I guess we'll see.
> 
> Tomorrow is another date with a different guy. I'm pretty sure I'll end up really liking him too, but who knows.
> 
> Keep your fingers crossed, guys. :*



You are an inspiration to us all!


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## HDANGEL15 (Feb 13, 2010)

*Damn--- I guess I would actually have to *BEEN* on a *DATE* to post in this thread.........:doh:*


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## GTAFA (Feb 13, 2010)

I don't know how i missed seeing this thread. Great idea...

Does it count as a date if the two people know they're just meeting as "friends"? That's what we did. I know she's not my type. While she's very tall & beautiful and talented, and i do hope to work with her someday professionally she's too thin. And besides i am just not ready for a relationship. I thought we could still meet as friends, since we've been talking on POF for awhile. Originally we were going to go see a show downtown here in Toronto but the drink we went for before-hand turned into the entire evening. 

We drank and talked and drank. I was sipping a beer so i was not out of control, whereas her G & T seemed to get her going. We started talking about previous relationships (well hers anyway). She got louder. She pounded the table. Even after 5 minute paragraphs she didn't like it when i wanted to insert a comment (haha i thought she might have run out of breath,....*no such luck*).

She did eventually ask me if i wanted to talk about my own history. I did interject a bit, but hey, it was really good to confirm that not only was she not my type physically, there was no way i could work with her. After two drinks she was already showing me that she was abusive. I consider myself fortunate that she showed me her true colours. What was it Scotty said on _Star Trek_...? "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me". 

And then there's the version GWB gives us ( http://www.spike.com/video/fool-me-once-george/3096021) .... 

Is friendship really possible? i am still mulling that one over.


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## Tania (Feb 13, 2010)

Date 2 Ok but no chemistry. Hoping Mr. Yesterday asks me out again. Dating is hard. I thought The Universe would take pity on me given my 16+ men last year, but I doubt I'll be that lucky.


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## LovelyLiz (Feb 13, 2010)

Tania said:


> Date 2 Ok but no chemistry. Hoping Mr. Yesterday asks me out again. Dating is hard. I thought The Universe would take pity on me given my 16+ men last year, but I doubt I'll be that lucky.



Sorry there wasn't chemistry, that can be disappointing. And I FULLY agree with the statement "dating is hard." 

Still - props to you for getting out there and doing it!


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## steely (Feb 13, 2010)

GTAFA said:


> I don't know how i missed seeing this thread. Great idea...
> 
> Does it count as a date if the two people know they're just meeting as "friends"? That's what we did. I know she's not my type. While she's very tall & beautiful and talented, and i do hope to work with her someday professionally she's too thin. And besides i am just not ready for a relationship. I thought we could still meet as friends, since we've been talking on POF for awhile. Originally we were going to go see a show downtown here in Toronto but the drink we went for before-hand turned into the entire evening.
> 
> ...



You are the lucky one, there's no wondering now. You don't have to waste time.


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## steely (Feb 13, 2010)

Tania said:


> Date 2 Ok but no chemistry. Hoping Mr. Yesterday asks me out again. Dating is hard. I thought The Universe would take pity on me given my 16+ men last year, but I doubt I'll be that lucky.



Fingers crossed for Mr. Yesterday to call!


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## Jon Blaze (Feb 14, 2010)

I just went on one.
It was with a friend whom I never met in person until today. We've been talking for over six months though.
I picked her up from her apartment, took her to a local Mexican Place where we talked and got to know each other a bit more. It went well.

Then we went to a theater to see Dear John, which we both thought was a good movie.

After that I drove her home, and she invited me in. We talked more, and then we got really close. Now we're dating, and I have to get chocolates and roses when I wake up. :wubu:


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## littlefairywren (Feb 14, 2010)

Tania said:


> Date 2 Ok but no chemistry. Hoping Mr. Yesterday asks me out again. Dating is hard. I thought The Universe would take pity on me given my 16+ men last year, but I doubt I'll be that lucky.



Sorry about #2. 
I am crossing my fingers for you too  Come on Mr. Yesterday!!!


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## jewels_mystery (Feb 14, 2010)

Jon Blaze said:


> I just went on one.
> It was with a friend whom I never met in person until today. We've been talking for over six months though.
> I picked her up from her apartment, took her to a local Mexican Place where we talked and got to know each other a bit more. It went well.
> 
> ...



yay. Congrats


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## littlefairywren (Feb 14, 2010)

Jon Blaze said:


> I just went on one.
> It was with a friend whom I never met in person until today. We've been talking for over six months though.
> I picked her up from her apartment, took her to a local Mexican Place where we talked and got to know each other a bit more. It went well.
> 
> ...



Woo hoo, a good dating story :happy:


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## jewels_mystery (Feb 14, 2010)

GTAFA said:


> I don't know how i missed seeing this thread. Great idea...
> 
> Does it count as a date if the two people know they're just meeting as "friends"? That's what we did. I know she's not my type. While she's very tall & beautiful and talented, and i do hope to work with her someday professionally she's too thin. And besides i am just not ready for a relationship. I thought we could still meet as friends, since we've been talking on POF for awhile. Originally we were going to go see a show downtown here in Toronto but the drink we went for before-hand turned into the entire evening.
> 
> ...



wow, if she had a chance sounds like she blew it. Sorry the night did not go well.


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## Aust99 (Feb 14, 2010)

Jon Blaze said:


> I just went on one.
> It was with a friend whom I never met in person until today. We've been talking for over six months though.
> I picked her up from her apartment, took her to a local Mexican Place where we talked and got to know each other a bit more. It went well.
> 
> ...





Aww... congrats Jon.. Glad to have a positive date in this thread.... I love reading them all though...


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## LovelyLiz (Feb 14, 2010)

Jon Blaze said:


> I just went on one.
> It was with a friend whom I never met in person until today. We've been talking for over six months though.
> I picked her up from her apartment, took her to a local Mexican Place where we talked and got to know each other a bit more. It went well.
> 
> ...



Yay! So happy to hear how well it went. Hope you guys have a fun, mushy Valentine's Day together.


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## wittymoniker (Feb 14, 2010)

Okay so it's 4pm and yes, I am going on a first date. On Valentines day. I figured why not, I mean I made a reservation last week just in case and things fell into place.

Pickup around 7:30, dinner, and then off to a night viewing at the Dallas Museum of Art. No balloons or teddy bears, no chocolates. Just a normal date and the hope that things stay light and not weird surrounded by people who are trying one day out of the year to pretend they are madly in love.

So a few hours until, and now i'll begin cleaning myself up, ironing my white burberry polo, and figuring out which sportcoat to wear. Wish me luck everyone, i'll update tonight or tomorrow


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## liz (di-va) (Feb 14, 2010)

Last date was super-dreadful. Got myself out of there in 58 minutes. The hashbrowns were good, though .


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## Gingembre (Feb 14, 2010)

I've got a date tomorrow! Eeeek! With an Australian man from POF! We've been talking for a little while and there's nothing like being alone on Valentine's to make you agree to a date, haha! Not been on a proper first date for a while and I am super nervous but hopefully it won't be a complete disaster and I might at least make a friend. WISH ME LUCK!


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## littlefairywren (Feb 14, 2010)

wittymoniker said:


> Okay so it's 4pm and yes, I am going on a first date. On Valentines day. I figured why not, I mean I made a reservation last week just in case and things fell into place.
> 
> Pickup around 7:30, dinner, and then off to a night viewing at the Dallas Museum of Art. No balloons or teddy bears, no chocolates. Just a normal date and the hope that things stay light and not weird surrounded by people who are trying one day out of the year to pretend they are madly in love.
> 
> So a few hours until, and now i'll begin cleaning myself up, ironing my white burberry polo, and figuring out which sportcoat to wear. Wish me luck everyone, i'll update tonight or tomorrow



Good luck!!! Sounds like a nice date.
And yes, we all want the details


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## littlefairywren (Feb 14, 2010)

Gingembre said:


> I've got a date tomorrow! Eeeek! With an Australian man from POF! We've been talking for a little while and there's nothing like being alone on Valentine's to make you agree to a date, haha! Not been on a proper first date for a while and I am super nervous but hopefully it won't be a complete disaster and I might at least make a friend. WISH ME LUCK!



Hmmm, an Aussie guy....he better behave himself!
Crossing my fingers for you :happy:


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## ladle (Feb 14, 2010)

My most recent date was Monday February 15th 2010. It was much like the previous date which was Sunday February 14th 2010. :doh:


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## freakyfred (Feb 14, 2010)

Last summer. Was fun. Went bowling and watched Life of Brian. We kinda lost contact since though.


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## jewels_mystery (Feb 15, 2010)

wittymoniker said:


> Okay so it's 4pm and yes, I am going on a first date. On Valentines day. I figured why not, I mean I made a reservation last week just in case and things fell into place.
> 
> Pickup around 7:30, dinner, and then off to a night viewing at the Dallas Museum of Art. No balloons or teddy bears, no chocolates. Just a normal date and the hope that things stay light and not weird surrounded by people who are trying one day out of the year to pretend they are madly in love.
> 
> So a few hours until, and now i'll begin cleaning myself up, ironing my white burberry polo, and figuring out which sportcoat to wear. Wish me luck everyone, i'll update tonight or tomorrow



Good luck. I hope it went well.


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## Rowan (Feb 15, 2010)

Tania said:


> Date 2 Ok but no chemistry. Hoping Mr. Yesterday asks me out again. Dating is hard. I thought The Universe would take pity on me given my 16+ men last year, but I doubt I'll be that lucky.



No wonder i cant get a guy...Tania has em all...16+??? lol

Good luck on Mr. Yesterday


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## Jes (Feb 15, 2010)

Rowan said:


> No wonder i cant get a guy...Tania has em all...16+??? lol
> 
> Good luck on Mr. Yesterday



Either that, or she was telling us she only dates those aged 16 and over. haha. I seriously hope it's the latter---that'll make for a good thread!


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## GTAFA (Feb 15, 2010)

jewels_mystery said:


> wow, if she had a chance sounds like she blew it. Sorry the night did not go well.



Thanks for the sympathetic words. To be honest, i don't know if she did have a chance. I met her saying that i was going to be a friend (after exchanging a few messages on POF), and that she was safe to talk to me. 

I think she saw me as a confidant, someone to complain to. I came away from the evening thinking "wow some people are really angry", and a little in awe of people who date regularly. It's hard to do.


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## GTAFA (Feb 15, 2010)

steely said:


> You are the lucky one, there's no wondering now. You don't have to waste time.



Yes indeed!! If dating and courtship are designed to discover the true person, then i saw the real woman. Considering that we were fully clothed it was curiously intimate: intimate like a bad marriage. 

~~Sigh~~


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## bmann0413 (Feb 21, 2010)

Well, I dunno if it counts, but when I went home to New Orleans for Mardi Gras, I hung out with a friend of mine (on Valentine's day, no less) who I am REALLY interested in. The thing is, I hung out with her AND her friends.


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## LovelyLiz (Feb 21, 2010)

bmann0413 said:


> Well, I dunno if it counts, but when I went home to New Orleans for Mardi Gras, I hung out with a friend of mine (on Valentine's day, no less) who I am REALLY interested in. The thing is, I hung out with her AND her friends.



Saw that pic in another thread! You guys looked good.  So how did it go??


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## bmann0413 (Feb 21, 2010)

mcbeth said:


> Saw that pic in another thread! You guys looked good.  So how did it go??



It went really good. For a short while, we hung out with each other alone and talked for a while. We have the same interests, the same thoughts on different topics, and I think she might've said that she was interested in me. I'm not sure about that last one, but I really hope she is. :wubu:


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## littlefairywren (Feb 21, 2010)

bmann0413 said:


> It went really good. For a short while, we hung out with each other alone and talked for a while. We have the same interests, the same thoughts on different topics, and I think she might've said that she was interested in me. I'm not sure about that last one, but I really hope she is. :wubu:



Well I hope she is interested too...good luck


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## snuggletiger (Feb 22, 2010)

Date went fine till the lady asked for me if I would be interested in cosigning for a car loan.


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## littlefairywren (Feb 23, 2010)

snuggletiger said:


> Date went fine till the lady asked for me if I would be interested in cosigning for a car loan.



Hell no! That was not a date, that sounds more like an interview 
(((hugs)))


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## jewels_mystery (Feb 23, 2010)

snuggletiger said:


> Date went fine till the lady asked for me if I would be interested in cosigning for a car loan.



Are you serious? The nerve. I am sorry you had to experience such a loser.


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## Sandie_Zitkus (Feb 23, 2010)

Quick question - why can't you call him?? 





Tania said:


> I just got home from my first date of the weekend. It lasted five hours. We ate. We drank. We laughed. He's cute and funny and sweet and I like him. I guess we'll see.
> 
> Tomorrow is another date with a different guy. I'm pretty sure I'll end up really liking him too, but who knows.
> 
> Keep your fingers crossed, guys. :*


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## LovelyLiz (Feb 23, 2010)

Sandie_Zitkus said:


> Quick question - why can't you call him??



Oh man...this question...it deserves a thread (or practically a whole forum) all to itself...

It's the eternal conundrum.


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## Gingembre (Feb 27, 2010)

Gingembre said:


> I've got a date tomorrow! Eeeek! With an Australian man from POF! We've been talking for a little while and there's nothing like being alone on Valentine's to make you agree to a date, haha! Not been on a proper first date for a while and I am super nervous but hopefully it won't be a complete disaster and I might at least make a friend. WISH ME LUCK!



Just realised i never reported back! Considering he was a guy from POF and we hadn't been talking that long before we met, the date was GOOD! He's a really nice guy, we have similar outlook/views on life and he's nice to spend time with. I have seen him a few times since and altho we get on and have GREAT sexeh times (heh heh), there's no butterflies and he doesn't make me laugh...like, he's amusing, but there's no hysterics. Just feels like something's missing, but I'm not sure if the fact i'm moving away in a few months and he's looking for a new job in London/somewhere else in the UK means we're keeping each other at arms length emotionally? Either way, a boyfriend is not reeeeally want i'm after, and i don't think he's after a girlfriend, so we seem to have landed in a rather good Friends With Benefits situation! I'm not complaining, lol!  :happy:


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## Tania (Feb 28, 2010)

Sandie_Zitkus said:


> Quick question - why can't you call him??



At the time I wrote my previous post, I was the last person to make contact in the mail/phone/text exchange. I have a rule; until we have some sort of understanding, I don't do two contacts in a row if I can possibly help it. 

If he doesn't get in touch, or waits too long to get in touch without a reasonable explanation, I cut him loose. No harm, no foul, no energy wasted wondering what's up. 

Anyway, to update you all...Mr. Friday Night emailed me four days later with handwringing apologies for not "feeling an inner connection." I was fine with that, but it left me scratching my head, kinda. Once I'd sobered up (I'd had a lot to drink that night, though not as much as he'd had), I came to the realization that the dude may be an alcoholic. At the very least, he's having issues coping with life. I'm pretty naive, apparently, because it's difficult for me to tell the difference between "troubled" and "candidly humorous." Or maybe I'm too accepting - I don't fucking know. I wanted to think well of him because he had been SO nice and had been SO excited at the prospect of hanging out with me. 

And when I said I dated 16+ men last year, I meant that I dated sixteen people. There were others, but I'm not sure if I should count those experiences as "dates." Is sex a date? If you have dinner with a poly person and his girlfriend, and it's understood all-around that he wants to sleep with you, &c., is that a date? Stuff like that. 

Also, here's some searing irony: This latest go 'round was probably the second or third time I've basically had a guy tell me I was too perky and happy. What the hell does that mean? Because I read a lot of Jane Austen and bounce around a lot when I'm in a good mood, that suddenly makes me the Idiot Queen? I don't fucking get it. Would they rather I greet them with a snarl and a slap in the face?


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## Bearsy (Mar 2, 2010)

Got to the club, hung out talking for 20 minutes or so, she asked me to dance so we did for a bit... 15 minutes later the headliner got on stage and she wanted to get in the floor, cause we were hanging towards the outside.

She's 5'2" and was wearing all black, so the instant she went behind someone, I lost her in the crowd and spent the next 30 minutes looking for her.

Then I find out she had left 20 minutes earlier cause her ride had to leave.

So it didn't go too well.

Turns out it wasn't even a date and that I was just an escort to keep unwanted suitors away.

First and only date(so to speak) I've ever been on.


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## bmann0413 (Mar 2, 2010)

Yeah, so the girl I was interested in only wanted to be friends. Story of my loser life. *sigh*


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## sirGordy (Mar 2, 2010)

bmann0413 said:


> Yeah, so the girl I was interested in only wanted to be friends. Story of my loser life. *sigh*



Lloyd, you are not a loser, and do not think of yourself that way. Been down that same path, paid tolls on that same turnpike. But look at it this way, many more roads to travel, and one of them will be paved with gold, and will lead you to the right interchange, and a good destination.

You hang in there, the right one is out there for you


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## KuroBara (Mar 2, 2010)

bmann0413 said:


> Yeah, so the girl I was interested in only wanted to be friends. Story of my loser life. *sigh*




AWW!! It's her loss, not yours. And you are a lover, not a loser!:kiss2:


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## Aust99 (Mar 2, 2010)

Plenty of other fish in the sea.... I truly believe there is someone for everyone Lloyd. She was just not the right one. Go fishing again when you feel up to it.


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## succubus_dxb (Mar 3, 2010)

Bearsy said:


> Got to the club, hung out talking for 20 minutes or so, she asked me to dance so we did for a bit... 15 minutes later the headliner got on stage and she wanted to get in the floor, cause we were hanging towards the outside.
> 
> She's 5'2" and was wearing all black, so the instant she went behind someone, I lost her in the crowd and spent the next 30 minutes looking for her.
> 
> ...



that is SHITTY behaviour on her part dude, sorry to hear that 

Don't stop putting yourself out there  there might be a lovely Dims girl in your area!


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## thatgirl08 (Mar 4, 2010)

succubus_dxb said:


> Don't stop putting yourself out there  there might be a lovely Dims girl in your area!



what's uppp


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## DitzyBrunette (Apr 4, 2010)

Bad bad date. 4.2.2010 (ETA, didn't realize how long it was, I guess I was really pissed off!!)
Met him on PoF (which seems to be a running theme in here!). He was nice in email so I gave him my AIM handle when he asked. After a bit of IMing he asked for my number and I told him Ok but I'm not big on talking on the phone much, I don't mind the occasional chat but I prefer texting and saving longer conversations for in person. We had a nice phone call, he seemed ok, a bit of a fast talker and hyper but I attributed it to nervousness maybe? We made plans for yesterday (this was 10 days ago). The next day he texts me first thing in the morning to say good morning. I text back and say good morning and he texts back and starts a conversation in text. I tell him I can't text during the day much and I'll get back to him later. I get an "I'm thinking of you " text not 2 hours later. I'm a stranger, I've known you 2 days, reel it in. That evening he texts me to "just saying hey, I'll text you after bowling". Ok.. after bowling he comes online and asks how my day was, I say I'm tired and he goes Ok I'll let you go so you don't have to stay up for me. I told him I'm not online just for him, wtf?? Next day, first thing, "Good morning!" and the next day after, same thing. I'd get texts towards the evening saying "Hey, I'll be home soon, talk to you then!" Did I miss the part where he became my boyfriend or a close friend and I'll be waiting around for him? The next time we talked on the phone I reiterated I don't like clingy men (says so right on my profile) and I don't need to talk to someone every single day, I like my space and we don't even know each other yet so it's a lot to take in. He's all Yeah, I get it, cool, I understand. Next morning, "Good morning! I'll leave you alone today, just wanted to say good morning!" LOL. For real. Other than seeming to want a gf pretty bad he is harmless, so I tolerated it because he had other great qualities and figured, don't judge before date one, at least go on one date and take it from there. For the rest of the week he would bring up bringing his camera on our date to take pictures (I shot that down, no you will not), he said he was gonna bring me to a fancy restaurant for dinner after for our second date (guess he missed the part of my profile that says I don't do fancy dresses and champagne, I'm a dive bar and rum girl), says he needs to get his place together so he can have me over (this is all less than 7 days after our first emails lol). Anyways, so this week is Spring Break and my son and I have 10 days of vacation so I tell him how excited I am to sleep late all week and relax and do nothing. Friday, first day of vacation the motherfucker texts me at 8am!!!!! ^$*#&$(@*+$ 
So there's the mental image of the guy. I tried not to be Textbook Me and blow him off before actually meeting (like Seinfeld, I usually see the one annoying thing and get the fuck outta Dodge). 
So date night. He has a car but says we might end up hanging out all night (nope) so he'd rather take a cab. I find out the cab is gonna be 60 bucks (!!!!!!!!!) because he's a half hour away and he's all Who cares, it's just money (turn off, a fool and his money are soon parted. As a single Mom, I'm more frugal and he didn't understand why I thought he was Looney Tunes for this). He arrives and smells amazing, looks great, better than pictures (his one redeeming quality I would soon discover). I took him to my local bar where I go all the time, I'm comfortable there, I know people. He then brings the hyper fast-talking phone voice in person and is a hell of a lot louder than the phone. I was feeling embarrassed because I don't like loud people who bring the attention and after a few mins I tell him Maybe we can talk a bit quieter, I'm not much of a rambunctious person in public? He says "No one is paying attention to us, it's no big deal." Ok, wonderful, how I feel is no big deal. Strike One, Douche. Some Spanish music comes on the jukebox and he asks if I like what's playing. I say, "I can't stand Spanish music, ugh. Hopefully something better comes on after." He proceeds to tell me I shouldn't shoot it down, I should be open-minded and like everything, it has a good beat (blah blah, I started tuning him out). I say "Dude, I like what I like, I won't apologize lol." He asks what music do I like and I got out like 2 words before he starts listing all the music he likes and saying He'll "change my views". Starts saying how he can't wait to take me bowling when I already told him I will NEVER mess up my nails and wear nasty stinky rented shoes in this lifetime and he goes "I'll buy you new shoes of your own, come on, you'll go someday, we're doing it." Then asks if I wanted to dance and starts to kinda sway at the bar and I'm like "We've had this conversation, I don't dance." He goes, "Oh you will someday, I'm gonna make it happen." Like what am I, Build A Woman??? Just program your likes and she goes willingly? FUCK to the NO. 
Then he asks what did i do all day, I tell him I slept late, chilled at home, late lunch, watched TV. He TELLS me that I should have went outside because the weather was beautiful. I say yeah, I've been going outside every day, I love this weather. My son is old enough to play outside alone with his friends, I had nothing to do so I stayed in. He says that's lazy, wasting a whole day. I'm like, "So you never sleep in and enjoy a relaxing day off?" He says no, he gets up early even on weekends and I need to be more accommodating if this is gonna work out, I can't just tell people I sleep late on weekends because that's wasting a whole day (who knew days ended at noon, not me) and I should change that. I started texting my friends in front of him so I can save the evening. I told him, Um, I'm a single Mom and on top of taking care of my son 24/7 since conception I also take care of other people's kids all day for 14 yrs so on days off I relax. He goes, "Oh come on, you're bellyaching because you have a kid, I know plenty of single Moms who don't complain about it." I've never told a date to go fuck himself before last night. He says me being on my cell is annoying and I tell him Well you BEING here is annoying. I tell him I will gladly walk him to the bus stop so he can meet his friends in the city and he goes "I'm a big boy, I can take care of myself." Good fucktard, have at it. I told him he needs to go, my friend is coming and when she gets here we're leaving so either leave now or be sitting here alone when she gets here. This is embarrassing and we are clearly not a match (because all of his suggestions for my much needed life changes were LOUD and rambunctious no matter how many times I told him to please be quieter). 
He goes to the restroom and when he comes back I'm on my phone telling my friend where I am and he actually has the nerve to say, "I've done nothing wrong. Sorry this didn't work out." My WTF face made it's hundredth appearance of the evening and I ask him if he's serious. He says yeah, I didn't do anything wrong, I'm a nice guy and everything I say is wrong to you." I wave him off and stop him from talking and just ignore him and continue talking on my phone. He finally did something I liked - he LEFT. 
And thank fucking GOD he didn't text me this morning!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ladies - if you're on PoF and meet a guy from Iselin, NJ, RUN FAST. Do not reply to his emails!!! Save yourselves!


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## bmann0413 (Apr 4, 2010)

Wow, he doesn't sound like a douche. He sounds more like a giant-ego-having, totally controlling MEGA douche.


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Apr 4, 2010)

You're right to dump him fast- he probably is the right guy but for _another _woman. Also, he's apparently not willing to make all the compromises he was asking you to make. 
He tries too hard, methinks.......

A guy making a comment to me like that about taking care of my kids would piss me off, too. I would probably end up stabbing a guy like that in his sleep.


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## Tooz (Apr 4, 2010)

Is it a date if it is not explicitly labeled as such, but both parties are single and it's not implicitly stated that it's NOT a date?


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## DitzyBrunette (Apr 4, 2010)

bmann0413 said:


> Wow, he doesn't sound like a douche. He sounds more like a giant-ego-having, totally controlling MEGA douche.



Word. You hit the nail on the head.



Green Eyed Fairy said:


> You're right to dump him fast- he probably is the right guy but for _another _woman. Also, he's apparently not willing to make all the compromises he was asking you to make.
> He tries too hard, methinks.......
> 
> A guy making a comment to me like that about taking care of my kids would piss me off, too. I would probably end up stabbing a guy like that in his sleep.



In between one of his loud rantings I told him we're definitely not a match and he needs a woman more like him because he doesn't seem willing to compromise, so you're exactly right.
If he would have kept up his nonsense, I wouldn't have waited til he was sleeping 



Tooz said:


> Is it a date if it is not explicitly labeled as such, but both parties are single and it's not implicitly stated that it's NOT a date?



Tell us about it and we can decide from there?


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## thatgirl08 (Apr 4, 2010)

Okay I'm dying at "Build a Woman" but yeah what the fuck.. asshole. 

I had an amazing date last week butttt I'm not sure if it's going to work out with him. :/


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## GTAFA (Apr 8, 2010)

Tooz said:


> Is it a date if it is not explicitly labeled as such, but both parties are single and it's not implicitly stated that it's NOT a date?



There have been times when i have been with someone and i wanted it to be understood as a date, but it clearly wasn't a "date" as such. I think the expectations that are raised by that word are real. You go out with a friend to see a movie, hear a band, etc., it's not framed within the same context of expectations as when you understand that it's a date. And then there's that notion of when you are "dating" someone, which is associated. 

They say there are many pathways up the mountain, and i think that's also true with relationships and courtship. One can take a formal route--where the expectations etc are in a kind of verbal contract, as when people say they are "dating"-- or you can just hang out, do things with people (including the option of seeing more than one person, non-exclusively) and see what develops. In the midst of just being with someone, sometimes people's eyes meet and magic happens. Maybe calling it a "date" is semantics. But i think it's also a context thing. You can see God in many places, not just in church.


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## LovelyLiz (Apr 11, 2010)

I will give it a solid: so-so. 

In general it takes me a few meetings before I really begin to warm up to someone, especially if we're really different in some pronounced way (e.g., culture, conversational style, life-approach, humor). We just met at a mall-ish place, had some tea, and walked around. We didn't have a great conversational chemistry, but I am open to seeing if that can develop. But I did find him cute, and we had some attraction, it seemed. Good conversation, though, is a necessity for me in a relationship, and I like when it can happen from the moment of meeting, but que sera, sera.


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## DeerVictory (Apr 11, 2010)

I recently went on the closest thing resembling a date that wasn't at an airport or in a Best Western hotel. 

I felt sick to my stomach and uncomfortable, despite the fact that he was extremely kind. I don't know that that's necessarily the reaction a person seeks. Maybe dates aren't my thing.


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## Gingembre (Apr 12, 2010)

Raegan said:


> I felt sick to my stomach and uncomfortable, despite the fact that he was extremely kind. I don't know that that's necessarily the reaction a person seeks. Maybe dates aren't my thing.



I get like this! My friends quite like the few few getting-to-know-each-other dates, but if I could skip straight to, like, date 5? Date 10 (assuming i get that many ) I'd be so much happier!


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## missy_blue_eyez (Apr 20, 2010)

thatgirl08 said:


> So the guy who mysteriously got called into work and had to cancel our date Sunday.. yeah, we rescheduled and yeah, he stood me up. AWESOME. Honestly ladies, if something doesn't sound right it probably isn't.. trust your instincts! Best part is that this asshole is actually a member of Dims.. which is probably why I gave him more benefit of the doubt. No more mercy, swear to god. Also in case any of you happen to be talking to a guy from Rochester, let me know because you do not want to waste your time if it's this guy.. believe me.


Just saw this thread for the first time......

And after reading your experience with said 'dims guy' reminds me of all the really shitty Dims men I have been out with, and believe me at least 2 of them still to this day make my blood boil with how they treated me!

I have to tell you the story of one though, it was around 2 years ago but still........

So he messages me on here, not long after I joined the site actually, and we went out in April 2008, not long after me and my ex of 5 years broke up. It was quite soon, but my friends encouraged me to jump back into the dating cycle....anyway, I digress. So we send a few messages etc and we swap IM addresses where we talk. He tells me about himself and he seems cool. He was a teacher (or so he says) lived not too far away from me and anyway we hit it off. After a couple of weeks of IM'ing we swap numbers, and soon after we decide to go out. I remember making sure I had to be somewhere also that day just in case I needed an excuse to get away, so anyway I made it on a morning before I had to be at work later in the afternoon, the perfect excuse if I needed a swift exit.

Needless to say, the morning comes and I make my way out to where we are going to meet. I see him and Im pleasantly surprised and he is well....all over me with compliments etc. We had a good morning chatting, had brunch, wondered the area until it was time for me to leave, he offers to drive me to work, fine, not a problem. At the end, we kissed and I went off to work as he says he cant wait to see me again.

Anyway, we arrange to meet up again about a week or 2 later. He even booked a hotel to stay the night so he didnt have to rush back. Lovely I thought, really thoughtful. So the day comes, he picks me up and we go over to check into his hotel, drop his stuff off and then we go out for the evening. He takes me out for dinner and drinks and we had a great night. I did stay over, but he was a gent. The next day, we had a day planned together, this is where the alarm bells should have went off. I got into the passenger seat of the car while he is putting his bags in the boot off the car. While I go to sit down I find an eyeliner on the floor. I knew it wasnt mine, so I picked it up and asked whos it was. He looked a little flustered and said quickly that it must have belonged to a co-worker whom he drives to work. Ok I thought and let it go as he took it off me and threw it into the glove box. We had a great day, and it ended with us making plans to see each other again. Now, what I should have mentioned in this is that he was always terribly off with me ever trying to call him, it was either text messages or Id get the odd phonecall off him at certain times, at the time you dont think anything of it but afterwards the pieces fit.

So the day comes where we are to go on our third date, he has apparently booked a room again to stay over. I am at work that evening and he arranges to pick me up. I finish my shift and wait to here off him. 15 minutes later still havent heard anything so I try calling, the phone calls out and then gets voicemail...so I text. Time passes and I keep trying to call, I get nothing until finally the phone is turned off. After about an hour I give up and leave it and think forget it. About an hour and half later I get some sketchy text saying something like 'been in an accident on way to hospital, im fine dont call'. Now forgive me, but if someone you are dating, whom is meant to be on there way to you at the time, has been in an accident, you wanna make sure they are ok!!! So I frantically start calling his mobile to see if he is ok, I continuously get cut off until it is switched off again. So thinking ahead, I try and call the hotel to get the room cancelled.....guess what, there was no room ever booked in his name. For the next 24 hours I hear nothing from him while trying to call his phone and getting nothing. I never had any more phone contact from him. Although a few days later he popped up on msn, saying he was moving to greece. I asked about the 'car accident' he gave me a few sketchy details.........hmmmmmm yeh right!

I never found out the truth, or what happened but my guess is he wasnt really single, he was going back and forth on the sly, and that eyeliner should have got me asking questions sooner. But to go to the length of faking a car accident to get out of meeting me well please......tell the truth guys and if you, you know who you are, are reading this. I hope after 2 years you have finally grown up! He was one of a few frogs I have kissed from Dims, the other 2 are....and RAF soldier who reckoned and actually still reckons he was in love with me, we got together twice then after for him to do a disappearing act on me. (Although I know he was sending lots of messages to girls on here) and the other who is in the army now whom I didnt meet on Dims but I know he is a dims user who also used to tell me he loved me, but who was also sleeping with about 3 other girls at the same time, we caught him out after a facebook post which led us 4 to each other through pm and we all found out the truth, that he had been flitting between all of us over a period of about 12 months......I also should have caught onto him a bit sooner after going to see him one day and finding a used condom by the bed.......I was like 'errr wtf' and went to leave and he got all flustered and came up with some story about he'd had a posh wank the night before....lie, after speaking to the girls turns out one of them had been there the night before me....wanker! Id love to give you there usernames!

But there is a happy ending.....I met my current beau here, as most of you know and he is a treasure. I had the best date of my life with him after we sent a few messages to each other and finally met up after about a month of texting/im'ing and calling. He is a Dims treasure! And with this...I bow out! I hope im not in trouble for telling a past date story, but thought it would be good to add  Nx

P.S if anybody would like any further details which I havent told here, dont be afraid to PM me, us Dims girls gotta stick together!


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## thatgirl08 (Apr 21, 2010)

Wow, Missy.. both of those sound terrible.. glad you found a good guy in the end. :]


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## LovelyLiz (Apr 21, 2010)

Seriously! "I can't make it because I got in a car accident and I'm headed to the hospital - don't call me." WTF? Worst. excuse. ever. Shady character!

I'm with thatgirl - glad you and your bf found each other.


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## MzDeeZyre (Apr 21, 2010)

Ughhh.... went on a date last night. Yuck... is probably the best way to describe it.

So I met this guy, while at a friends house. Apparently he is a friend of her hubby's. So we chatted a little while there, but everyone was drinking, so I really thought nothing more of it. 

A few weeks ago, I get an add request from him on Facebook, so I add him. We've been talking since the latter part of March. On friday night he out of the blue text's me via a FB message, and ask's if I'd ike to go out with him that night. I declined, as I was already out, and had 4 girls scheduled to do Prom makeup on for Saturday. 

So on Sunday, we are chatting and he again brings up a date. I finally say that Tuesday or Wednesday evening would work best for me. So now it's Tuesday. He texts me about 11:30 am, and sets up a plan. The restaurant he wants to go to is a no go in my book. So I wait awhile and text him back and state I'm not really fond of this restaurant, but gave him a list of 3 that I'd be more apt to eat at. He agrees. 

Now it's 6:30. I'm sitting at the restuarant. I wait 10 mins before I text him to find out where he is. He texts back, says he made a stop at Video Games ETC , and will be there in a few mins. I am already thinking at this point...Good Lord Lissa, what have you gotten yourself into. So I wait, and surf FB from my phone. Next time I look at the clock....7:00. I text him and say " If you're not less than 5 mins away, I'm leaving. I'm not paying a babysitter to sit in a parking lot". He texts back and says he's less than 5, and will be there shortly.

7:09 he arrives. Gets out and stands next to my van, tapping on my window. I see you asshat....and as you see I have my phone to my head and am talking. I get out, and he says "man.... you look great". I thanked him and we head inside. The waitress asks table or booth, and I asked her if the booth tables were movable? If so I want a booth... he looked puzzled. When we were seated he asked " what was the drama about the booth" I kindly explained, that since I am a SSBBW, that booths arent always comfortable for me. He said... well you look fine to me. Whatever.... I let it go. SO we order, and he keeps asking me in front of the waitress.... are you sure that's all you want? Yes, I'm positive. I ordered a meal....wtf?

After the waitress leaves he leans over, and grabs my hand and says " you know.... i've dated fat girls my whole life" I said ok. And he continues with " if you want to, we can get you something else to eat". I let him know that I am good with one meal. Meanwhile I notice that this hand, that he has grabbed my hand with, is gross. Dirty, and has dirt caked under his long fingernails. GROSS!

I pulled my hand away from him, and made a joke like....."looks like you had a long hard day at work today eh?" He looked puzzled so I said.... your hands are dirty. He says " oh yeah... I know". Didn;t get up to wash them.... nothing.

Food comes, we are eating.... worst nightmare Loud Open Mouthed Eater. And he insists on talking about his mom, whom I've now found out that he lives with. Really.....? So about now I pick up my phone and start randomly texting anyone I know that will answer me quickly. I get a text back, and I let him know that I gotta go. He says..... oh.... I was hoping we could head back to my place for a little dessert if you know what I mean. WTF!

I said nicely.... I'll pass. He looked at me like I was crazy. I reached for the bill, as I was going to pay my portion, and he ripped it from my hands. Ummm ok, I'll let you pay for my dinner whatever. So I get up and he comes over and puts his hand on the small of my back like he's going to try and do something. I turned the opposite way and said ok.... well thanks for dinner. Have a good night! 

I get home, and he texts me and asks if I want a PicMail of his "man meat" 


Seriously......FML!


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## CastingPearls (Apr 21, 2010)

MzDeeZyre said:


> Ughhh.... went on a date last night. Yuck... is probably the best way to describe it.
> 
> So I met this guy, while at a friends house. Apparently he is a friend of her hubby's. So we chatted a little while there, but everyone was drinking, so I really thought nothing more of it.
> 
> ...


OMG What a freakin nightmare! It just got worse and worse!!! MANMEAT!!! LOL


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## Nutty (Apr 21, 2010)

MzDeeZyre said:


> Ughhh.... went on a date last night. Yuck... is probably the best way to describe it.
> 
> So I met this guy, while at a friends house. Apparently he is a friend of her hubby's. So we chatted a little while there, but everyone was drinking, so I really thought nothing more of it.
> 
> ...



Congratulations! You're date was the winner of............. 

View attachment bestworstdatelogo.jpg


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## Jes (Apr 21, 2010)

mcbeth said:


> Seriously! "I can't make it because I got in a car accident and I'm headed to the hospital - don't call me." WTF? Worst. excuse. ever. Shady character!
> 
> I'm with thatgirl - glad you and your bf found each other.



My friend (yes, real friend, not me) got the 'my grandma died' once. 

I have to say, the dating world (and homework) is just DEADLY for grandmothers, ain't it?? pity.


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## OhLaLaSoSexy (Apr 21, 2010)

missy_blue_eyez said:


> Just saw this thread for the first time......
> 
> And after reading your experience with said 'dims guy' reminds me of all the really shitty Dims men I have been out with, and believe me at least 2 of them still to this day make my blood boil with how they treated me!
> 
> ...



was he even greek? or did he randomly say "im moving to greece"? haha
Sadly if he was greek, ive heard greek guys use that before.


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## CastingPearls (May 7, 2010)

DitzyBrunette said:


> Bad bad date. 4.2.2010 (ETA, didn't realize how long it was, I guess I was really pissed off!!)
> Met him on PoF (which seems to be a running theme in here!). He was nice in email so I gave him my AIM handle when he asked. After a bit of IMing he asked for my number and I told him Ok but I'm not big on talking on the phone much, I don't mind the occasional chat but I prefer texting and saving longer conversations for in person. We had a nice phone call, he seemed ok, a bit of a fast talker and hyper but I attributed it to nervousness maybe? We made plans for yesterday (this was 10 days ago). The next day he texts me first thing in the morning to say good morning. I text back and say good morning and he texts back and starts a conversation in text. I tell him I can't text during the day much and I'll get back to him later. I get an "I'm thinking of you " text not 2 hours later. I'm a stranger, I've known you 2 days, reel it in. That evening he texts me to "just saying hey, I'll text you after bowling". Ok.. after bowling he comes online and asks how my day was, I say I'm tired and he goes Ok I'll let you go so you don't have to stay up for me. I told him I'm not online just for him, wtf?? Next day, first thing, "Good morning!" and the next day after, same thing. I'd get texts towards the evening saying "Hey, I'll be home soon, talk to you then!" Did I miss the part where he became my boyfriend or a close friend and I'll be waiting around for him? The next time we talked on the phone I reiterated I don't like clingy men (says so right on my profile) and I don't need to talk to someone every single day, I like my space and we don't even know each other yet so it's a lot to take in. He's all Yeah, I get it, cool, I understand. Next morning, "Good morning! I'll leave you alone today, just wanted to say good morning!" LOL. For real. Other than seeming to want a gf pretty bad he is harmless, so I tolerated it because he had other great qualities and figured, don't judge before date one, at least go on one date and take it from there. For the rest of the week he would bring up bringing his camera on our date to take pictures (I shot that down, no you will not), he said he was gonna bring me to a fancy restaurant for dinner after for our second date (guess he missed the part of my profile that says I don't do fancy dresses and champagne, I'm a dive bar and rum girl), says he needs to get his place together so he can have me over (this is all less than 7 days after our first emails lol). Anyways, so this week is Spring Break and my son and I have 10 days of vacation so I tell him how excited I am to sleep late all week and relax and do nothing. Friday, first day of vacation the motherfucker texts me at 8am!!!!! ^$*#&$(@*+$
> So there's the mental image of the guy. I tried not to be Textbook Me and blow him off before actually meeting (like Seinfeld, I usually see the one annoying thing and get the fuck outta Dodge).
> So date night. He has a car but says we might end up hanging out all night (nope) so he'd rather take a cab. I find out the cab is gonna be 60 bucks (!!!!!!!!!) because he's a half hour away and he's all Who cares, it's just money (turn off, a fool and his money are soon parted. As a single Mom, I'm more frugal and he didn't understand why I thought he was Looney Tunes for this). He arrives and smells amazing, looks great, better than pictures (his one redeeming quality I would soon discover). I took him to my local bar where I go all the time, I'm comfortable there, I know people. He then brings the hyper fast-talking phone voice in person and is a hell of a lot louder than the phone. I was feeling embarrassed because I don't like loud people who bring the attention and after a few mins I tell him Maybe we can talk a bit quieter, I'm not much of a rambunctious person in public? He says "No one is paying attention to us, it's no big deal." Ok, wonderful, how I feel is no big deal. Strike One, Douche. Some Spanish music comes on the jukebox and he asks if I like what's playing. I say, "I can't stand Spanish music, ugh. Hopefully something better comes on after." He proceeds to tell me I shouldn't shoot it down, I should be open-minded and like everything, it has a good beat (blah blah, I started tuning him out). I say "Dude, I like what I like, I won't apologize lol." He asks what music do I like and I got out like 2 words before he starts listing all the music he likes and saying He'll "change my views". Starts saying how he can't wait to take me bowling when I already told him I will NEVER mess up my nails and wear nasty stinky rented shoes in this lifetime and he goes "I'll buy you new shoes of your own, come on, you'll go someday, we're doing it." Then asks if I wanted to dance and starts to kinda sway at the bar and I'm like "We've had this conversation, I don't dance." He goes, "Oh you will someday, I'm gonna make it happen." Like what am I, Build A Woman??? Just program your likes and she goes willingly? FUCK to the NO.
> ...


This was your first mistake: Iselin, NJ. I blame it ALL on you! LOLOLOL


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## LovelyLiz (May 24, 2010)

My most recent date was tonight, and eh...I dunno.

I was going into it in a pretty bad self-esteem space - it's just been a rough few days (mostly just too little sleep combined with a couple other minor factors), and that's never a good way to go into a first date, because then I'm a little too invested in whether the guy will like me or not, etc. Plus it just makes it harder just to be loose and have fun (which is what makes for a great first date). But I still figured I'd give it a go. 

We said we'd meet at this restaurant at 8 - but when he got there, and we met in the parking lot, he said he really wanted to just go to the coffee place that was right next door, and it was just easier for him to say that we'd meet at the restaurant because everyone knew where it was. That was plausible, sort of, but with me already being in a little bit of an off mood, I interpreted it as, "I don't really think you're cute enough for us to have dinner. Let's just get coffee." But who really knows.

So he bought my coffee, and we talked for about an hour and the place closed. It was alright. Not an instant connection, and we didn't really seem to hit it off in some ways, but there were a few moments where we did connect. Maybe that's all that can be hoped for on a first date. But I wasn't feeling like we clicked that well. We left and he said he enjoyed talking to me and wanted to continue to talk some more sometime, and he kept touching me and whatnot (in a respectful way). But I've realized that guys just seem to say this at the end of dates, whether or not they actually do want to see me again, so I don't take it all that seriously.

He walked me to my car, and we had a nice hug, and then he said again that he wanted to get together some other time, and he tried to make some jokes, and then he said he wanted another hug, so we hugged again. A few more awkward statements were uttered by both of us - which I think is the kind of thing that happens when you hug someone and then feel kind of turned on, but realize nothing more should happen at that moment. Then we parted ways.

As I was driving home, I started worrying that maybe I had been a little too standoffish when he was saying he wanted to get together again...that my self-protection was a little too high and I didn't come off as inviting as I could have. So I sent him a text and just said, "I enjoyed meeting you. You're cute." And he didn't text back. It's not a huge deal, because it's not like I felt like we were soulmates or something, but just kind of makes for a blech-ish evening. Sigh.


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## LovelyLiz (May 27, 2010)

So, I went out with the guy from this post again tonight. It was alright. Though, I can't see us having anything serious. But we did enjoy each other's company, and the chemistry, so that was fun. We'll probably hang out from time to time, but I'm not interested in having a relationship with him - we just still don't click on a conversational level, which is super key for me.

And as for the guy in the above post from a few nights ago, he did text me to hang out again, but eh, I don't think either of us is really feeling it. 

Onward and upward!


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## bobbleheaddoll (May 27, 2010)

my most recent date was AWESOME!!! hotness of a bhm!!! *swoon*

funny, smart, creative...we had a fantastic time! woo! going out again!


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## supersizebbw (May 27, 2010)

bobbleheaddoll said:


> my most recent date was AWESOME!!! hotness of a bhm!!! *swoon*
> 
> funny, smart, creative...we had a fantastic time! woo! going out again!


aw, lucky you!!! always nice to hear success stories.


I recently met a guy, i wouldn't call it a date...more of an encounter. Sometime early last week i was sitting at the park and a guy walked up to me and asked if he could sit on my bench, i was like ok. So he struck up a conversation, initially i was super guarded (as i always am, and had to tell myself that i really need to learn to drop my guard) so loosened up abit. So we chatted abit but it was awkward-ish and i didn't feel a click with him at all. So when he asked for my number i thought of giving an excuse but just decided to give it out.

That night he called to say "hey" i quite dislike those calls because he didn't have much else to say. The next day i had an interview that was to end at 4pm but due to computer glitches ended at 7pm and it was a 2hour commute home so by the time i was getting home was tired and didn't feel like taking calls...when i looked at my phone i had 4missed calls and 3 texts from this guy....asking what he'd done and if i wasn't interested anymore. i was not amused since he was still literally a complete stranger to me.

He called afew days later asking if we could meet and i created more excuses. Then over the weekend i decided to just give it a chance. I was at the park and decided to call and ask if he wanted to meet, and it turns out he was at the park too. Anyway, so i'm on the phone with him and he says come over to the spot i am at because it's really quiet, and i'm like no thanks i like the park bench i'm at so you come over....then he adds no you come to my spot because i have a really nice spot where i'm lying down (and of course i wouldn't want to because that would be a super uncomfortable situation for me)...so told him no i like my spot so i'm staying here. 

So about a minute or so later he walks over and sits next to me. I had my headphones on and had a book with me. After he said hello and how have you been he didn't say much else...so for a while initially i took out the headphones and closed the book to show that i'm willing to have a conversation but the guy wasn't saying much! Then he starts saying, what are you doing tonight? Maybe we can meet then? And i told him, we're meeting now, here on this park bench...whatever you want to tell me later you can tell me now  I know that response seemed a little cold but the reason it was was because the few times he'd called before he'd be like i'm chilling in my house watching movies why don't you come over? And of course i can't go to a complete strangers house so said no. At that time i'd said maybe we can meet at a pub instead...and he tells me "i'm a student i don't have any money so can't afford to meet at a pub, unless you want to sponsor me" Of course at that time i should have taken this to be a complete looser-alert but he kept calling etc hence the meeting on the park bench.....okay going back to the park scene. After i told him that we're having the meeting now...he goes silent again...so i put back my headphones and book and pretended to be listening/reading when really i wasn't. What's the point of this fool sitting next to me if he's not going to say a thing?:doh:

So five mins of silence later i pretend i've gotten a text and that i need to leave, and he says "let me escort you home" (and even though i live literally 2mins from the park i didn't want him knowing where i live), so i said no thanks, then he says "let me escort you at least to the park gates", so again i said no thanks. Then he looked all upset and was silent...so i was like kthnxbye...and then he said i'm abit upset you wouldn't let me escort you, i just looked at him and continued walking on.

So he was silent till yesterday i got a call from him which of course i wasn't going to answer (i'm completely detaching myself from him), then he sends a text saying "i see your not answering my calls, whatever".

well, i say good riddance, it's his loss. on my part i think i'm glad i at least agreed to let my guard down (which is a big deal for me) and meet the guy again even if it was a disaster...at least i feel like i tried. usually i never do and for this reason always wonder if i've let lots of good men go by. oh well, live and learn.


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## pinkylou (May 28, 2010)

I cant remember...it was so long ago lol!!


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## Lamia (May 29, 2010)

supersizebbw said:


> aw, lucky you!!! always nice to hear success stories.
> 
> 
> I recently met a guy, i wouldn't call it a date...more of an encounter. Sometime early last week i was sitting at the park and a guy walked up to me and asked if he could sit on my bench, i was like ok. So he struck up a conversation, initially i was super guarded (as i always am, and had to tell myself that i really need to learn to drop my guard) so loosened up abit. So we chatted abit but it was awkward-ish and i didn't feel a click with him at all. So when he asked for my number i thought of giving an excuse but just decided to give it out.
> ...



umm wow...I got a really bad feeling about this person. Sounds like you did the right thing. He sounds like he's desperate to bang you and is wanting to dispense with the usual common courtesy of conversation and getting to know you. If you want to sponsor him? *GAG*

I wish for you a good encounter in the coming month with a charming man who appreciates good conversation with a wonderful person such as yourself. 

Such are my powers of good will.


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## supersizebbw (May 29, 2010)

Lamia said:


> I wish for you a good encounter in the coming month with a charming man who appreciates good conversation with a wonderful person such as yourself.
> 
> Such are my powers of good will.



awww, thanks for the kind words lamia  and should i encounter this new charming man i'll be sure to post my experience here...hopefully next time round things will work out .


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## willowmoon (May 29, 2010)

pinkylou said:


> I cant remember...it was so long ago lol!!



AWWWW, I doubt that!


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## frankman (May 29, 2010)

I hate dating. It's strangely unnatural and feels forced all the time.

That being said, yesterday I had dinner with a girl I met two weeks ago, and it was cool. It was a sort of "eh, where did everyone go? We seem to be the last ones here, you hungry?" thing, but that kind of added to the charm.

So yeah, it was nice.


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## thinguyforbbw (Jun 12, 2010)

supersizebbw said:


> awww, thanks for the kind words lamia  and should i encounter this new charming man i'll be sure to post my experience here...hopefully next time round things will work out .



ummm, please be careful. The guy just sounds weird!


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## supersizebbw (Jun 12, 2010)

thinguyforbbw said:


> ummm, please be careful. The guy just sounds weird!



i know, i've steered clear of that creep since that day...when i said i hope for a good encounter i meant with a new guy not with the creepy guy. thanks for the concern though


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## KittyKitten (Jun 12, 2010)

thatgirl08 said:


> I totally agree! I wanted to be like wow, couldn't you have brushed your hair and put on a clean shirt?



That brings me to ask why do some men think they they can look any kind of way and try to step to a woman? More men need to have some decency and care for themselves.


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## CarlaSixx (Jun 12, 2010)

My last date:

Decent guy but boring. There wasn't much that was quirky about him, and he thought it was funny to call himelf a "cunning linguist" :doh: It was hard to keep talking to him. It was okay, and he was okay, but it was boring  I let him have his kiss at the end of the date, because he wasn't creepy or anything, but there was no spark.

I haven't found anyone else since. I need better.


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## HDANGEL15 (Jul 3, 2010)

*had a first date after 2 weeks of pretty good texting...2.25 hours over lunch...and no breaks in conversation..it went really well

he is a real gentleman..seems to have great values 

but he smokes and has no desire to quit (despite a bypass 4 yrs ago) at age 39

and he is completely UNSPIRITUAL and an atheist...thats a big deal to me honestly.....

idk....he was attractive, intelligent, well traveled, a fantastic single dad (lost his wife diving in Solomon Islands to NETTLES 14 yrs ago)

lost his son 1 yr ago at college by way of a drunk driver..and is DEVOUT ATHEIST.....

i will def go out with him again..he made it clear he would love to have lunch /dinner with me if i would see him again...

how lame is this or shallow...his NOSTRILS ARE HUGE and I couldn't NOT LOOK UP THEM loll.....they which were trimmed at least......he was interesting....

*


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## lalatx (Jul 3, 2010)

My dates are always random the one last night/this morning was no exception. 

We planned a date at 3 am. I know its a really weird time to go on a date. He had prior plans to see a friends band play downtown and wanted to shower before our evening began. No complaints from me I like said band and support regular showering. Plus we are both insomniacs. 

Watched half of a movie than went on a very long drive around Austin and the hill country. Listened to a lot of music and talked... OK maybe we did more than talk. Went to Mount Bonnell to watch the sun rise over the lake. Ended the date at Kirby Lane for pancakes. 

All in all a excellent date with a good guy. Also it affirmed my love of boys from Tennessee, they have the best of all the southern accents.


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## LovelyLiz (Jul 3, 2010)

lalatx said:


> My dates are always random the one last night/this morning was no exception.
> 
> We planned a date at 3 am. I know its a really weird time to go on a date. He had prior plans to see a friends band play downtown and wanted to shower before our evening began. No complaints from me I like said band and support regular showering. Plus we are both insomniacs.
> 
> ...



That sounds like a SUPER fun date!!!! Very happy for you lalatx!


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## smiley55 (Jul 6, 2010)

lalatx said:


> My dates are always random the one last night/this morning was no exception.
> 
> We planned a date at 3 am. I know its a really weird time to go on a date. He had prior plans to see a friends band play downtown and wanted to shower before our evening began. No complaints from me I like said band and support regular showering. Plus we are both insomniacs.
> 
> ...



lalatx this is so awesome, i love dates like these! i love men with southern twangs too!! good luck 

i have one tomorrow..hope i get my groooove back since i've been in a rut for evarr. met him in an unexpected yet banal place,..and tomorrow is hump day haha. funny how strange things like this happen when you aren't even thinking about it, right?! does this happen to you all? seems like an awesome guy so i definitely don't want to screw this up. we have way too much in common its scary.. i confess i am the quintessential hopeless romantic though and because of this i fail often lol!..i better cool it .:blush:


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## lostjacket (Jul 6, 2010)

Hilariously awkward.

But aren't they all?

Basically met her at a coffee shop...and about half an hour into the thing realized we had nothing in common. She was cute though...


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## bmann0413 (Jul 7, 2010)

I wouldn't know. I keep getting stood up. Or girls keep saying "no."

*shrugs*


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## Tau (Jul 7, 2010)

bmann0413 said:


> I wouldn't know. I keep getting stood up. Or girls keep saying "no."
> 
> *shrugs*



They aren't going to say no forever. Chin up and don't give up *hugz*


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## LovelyLiz (Jul 7, 2010)

bmann0413 said:


> I wouldn't know. I keep getting stood up. Or girls keep saying "no."
> 
> *shrugs*



I agree with Tau, hang in there!

Maybe continue to hone the approach - and see what things work better than others...and eventually you'll find a girl who's a good fit!  And I also want to give you props for being out there and trying, and risking hearing the "no." We've all been there, and heard no lots of times, and it's easy to just decide to give up on the whole thing. So big props for persevering! :bow:


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## Sweet Tooth (Jul 8, 2010)

Non-existent. As was the one before that. Yes, got stood up twice in a row, although one was just buy a guy friend to hang out for the night. The other was supposed to be a first meet coffee with someone who pursued me online for almost 2 months.

The last one before that [not counting a friends "date" with an ex] was really good. The guy told me how much he liked me, how much he was attracted to me. I enjoyed myself. Then I didn't hear from him for weeks. Long story short, 3 1/2 weeks after the last time I saw him he called to tell me he was looking just for something physical and he sensed I wanted more. Uh, yeah... and why bother to play phone/text/email tag for 2 weeks to tell me that, idiot. And, uh, you didn't even try to kiss me after 3 dates. Like I would've known. 

I'm glad when men self-weed. Makes it so much easier on me. I just wish they wouldn't be idiots about it.


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## Bron82 (Jul 18, 2010)

5 years ago... I think...

We took a trip to Tunica to do a little gambling. It was our 5th date. He was very sweet and had even given me $100 to gamble on as soon as we got there. We had fun most of the day, hopping from casino to casino and spending some time at each of them. 

We got back to the casino and hotel where we were staying that night. We were walking through the casino and kind of got separated briefly amongst the slot machines. When I found him again he seemed fine so I just stood behind him and watched him play. Out of nowhere he turned to me and said "Hey, I need to get that $100 back from you." :doh:

I gave him the money back and he never really spoke to me for the rest of the night or the entire way back home the next day. Shortly thereafter we broke up.

The sad thing is that I miss Tunica more than I miss him!


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## HDANGEL15 (Jul 24, 2010)

HDANGEL15 said:


> *had a first date after 2 weeks of pretty good texting...2.25 hours over lunch...and no breaks in conversation..it went really well
> 
> he is a real gentleman..seems to have great values
> 
> ...




*UPDATE...date #2 never happened....the following weekend I went camping at a music festival..and he started to lose interest and then DID..which is fine with me...I wasn't that optimistic for any future, but my ego is slightly tarnished..as i thought he was interested and that was flattering...vain huh?*


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## vardon_grip (Jul 24, 2010)

Bron82 said:


> 5 years ago... I think...
> 
> We took a trip to Tunica to do a little gambling. It was our 5th date. He was very sweet and had even given me $100 to gamble on as soon as we got there. We had fun most of the day, hopping from casino to casino and spending some time at each of them.
> 
> ...



Hmmm...yeah, let me check my pockets...oh right! I gave the hundy to that nice lady at the blackjack table. She is holding it for you! Thanks anyway, Elvis.


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## LovelyLiz (Jul 25, 2010)

HDANGEL15 said:


> *UPDATE...date #2 never happened....the following weekend I went camping at a music festival..and he started to lose interest and then DID..which is fine with me...I wasn't that optimistic for any future, but my ego is slightly tarnished..as i thought he was interested and that was flattering...vain huh?*



Not vain, human.  It's so silly how even when it's a guy we're not that into, and aren't dying to see again anyway, that call back for a second date is still such a nice shot in the arm of validation. And then not getting it can really be disappointing. Hang in there, lady. And props to you for getting yourself out there and taking risks in the dating jungle!!!!


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## KittyKitten (Jul 25, 2010)

bmann0413 said:


> I wouldn't know. I keep getting stood up. Or girls keep saying "no."
> 
> *shrugs*



I can't imagine them saying no to such a good-hearted person. You will find that gem.


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## HDANGEL15 (Jul 25, 2010)

mcbeth said:


> Not vain, human.  It's so silly how even when it's a guy we're not that into, and aren't dying to see again anyway, that call back for a second date is still such a nice shot in the arm of validation. And then not getting it can really be disappointing. Hang in there, lady. And props to you for getting yourself out there and taking risks in the dating jungle!!!!



*THANKS ((((mcBeth)))) appreciate the thoughts...and yeah...i wasn't into him really, we had nothing in common..but it is EGO *


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## calauria (Jul 25, 2010)

Recent date was with a female....She stood me up.

I tried to call her to see what was going on, but she didn't answer her phone, thought she might have been in an accident or something, so I emailed her. She said she fell asleep and had her phone on vibrate. Then she apologized. I haven't said anything to her since. Not sure if I want anything to do with her now.


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## thirtiesgirl (Jul 25, 2010)

Ugh. I hate getting stood up, and for all those it's happened to recently, you have my sympathies. It hasn't happened to me often, thankfully, but the last time it was on my birthday. I know it was kind of stupid to plan an internet date on my birthday, but my friends were all out of town and I didn't have anything going on. I didn't tell the guy it was my birthday, but I thought it might be kind of fun to meet someone new, just hang out and have coffee and get to know someone other than myself. I waited around for nearly an hour and the guy never showed. I got a text message from him the next day, apologizing. I didn't respond and never called him again.

My last date was with a divorced dad of two teenage kids whose divorce turned out to be much more recent than he'd suggested in our e-mail and phone conversations prior to our date. In addition, he's one of those guys who needs to keep himself constantly busy with all kinds of goofy stuff. He works in IT, but for fun, he's also taking an improv comedy class, a bar tending class, and recently got his real estate license, just for the hell of it. In addition to seeing his two kids twice a month and his 9-5 job, the fact that he puts all this other stuff on his plate indicates that he really doesn't have time to date.

We couldn't even have a regular date because his schedule is so crazy. I agreed to meet him at his comedy improv night, mostly because I'd never been to one and wanted to see what it was like. I'd learned years ago that it's not usually a good idea to meet a guy when they're doing something else, since their attention will most likely be focused on that something else and not on you. One of my first ever internet dates was with a guy who invited me to meet him at the bar of the restaurant where he worked...as a bar tender. He was working when we met and spent most of the evening serving drinks and talking with his regular customers. He did comp me a drink, which was nice, but his focus was on making money and I was there mostly so he could just see what I looked like. He wasn't really interested in meeting _me_.

So the only reason I agreed to meet this guy at his comedy improv night was to see what it was all about. Turns out, it was at a seedy little club that's not really used to having live acts or live comedy. They didn't have a mic stand, so all the comedians had to hold the mic. When I arrived, there was a comic on stage with a guitar, playing songs in between his jokes. Because there was no mic stand at the club, the guy I was there to meet had to function as the mic holder, kneeling on his knees, when the guitar guy played a song. When the guitar guy finished his set with one last song, the guy I was meeting was finally able to get up and introduce the next comic coming to the stage. As he got off his knees, he quipped, "damn, I haven't been on my knees that much since I was with my ex-wife." _Yeah._  He made similar jokes at his ex-wife's expense the rest of the night. Apparently the Rat Pack's not dead and I'd just found it's missing member.

He did treat me to dinner after the comedy improv thing, during which I learned all the other stuff - that his divorce is more recent than he'd lead me to believe (he's still working out custody arrangements with his ex-wife), and he's doing the comedy thing, the bar tending thing, and a bunch of other stuff that really don't indicate that he's serious about dating.

He walked me to my car after the date, which was in the same parking garage as his. He gave me a hug at my car, we said our goodbyes and went our separate ways, but I never heard from him again. Which was fine with me, seeing as *I* dodged the bullet, as far as I'm concerned. He probably went home, wiping his brow and thinking "phew! I could've got stuck with a real fatty there!" Although, who knows. Maybe he just found me too boring. Which would be amusing, seeing as he hardly gave me a chance to say a word all night.

More recently, I had a phone conversation with a guy I met online who initially seemed very interested in me, but it became apparent that he's mostly just interested in looks and casual sex. One of the first questions he asked me when we talked on the phone was "do you wear dresses a lot?", trying to find out how femme I am, and how much of a chance he'd have at seeing a little leg. He'd seen my pics online, but apparently still wanted a clearer mental picture of my body, so he asked me to describe it. I complied to a certain extent, telling him I have big boobs, a big tum and kind of a flat ass. At which point he asked me, "so you have big boobs, huh? Do you have sun spots all over them, or do you use sunscreen?" Yeah. When I called him on it, he claimed he was only concerned about skin cancer. _Right._ When he asked me about my previous dating experiences and I told him about a few of the guys I'd met online, his next question was "did you ever get pregnant with any of them?" He already knew that I don't have kids, so the only reason he'd ask that question is to find out the state of my vajayjay and to figure out if I'm one of those extremely fertile women who gets pregnant very easily, and would therefore cripple his chances of getting bareback sex.  I quickly ended the phone call after that and thankfully, never heard from him again. Guys: when you meet a girl for the first time, don't ask her if she wears dresses a lot and if she's ever been pregnant. If she decides to date you for a period of time, those things will eventually come up. But don't ask her those questions the very first time you meet her. Seriously.


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## BBW4Chattery (Jul 26, 2010)

Well, first of all, this question makes me realize I'm a lame soul as this date took place in January of 2008 and that WAS my last date. It was on my birthday. I know, first date on my birthday, lame x2. It gets better.

He picks me up in a car barely big enough for two people. Not a sports car; a tiny electric car. He says it is his brother's and he had to borrow it because his died.

Then, we go to a BBQ restaurant, very casual. I decide I don't want to go through the extra awkward thing of people watching the fat girl eat so we get take out. He has "forgotten" his wallet. So I pay for the food; on my birthday.

We drive to the beach and eat. It was delicious. I can't complain about the food. We were going to get out and walk the shore but there were so many people.... I just asked him to take me home.

We drove past the grocery store and I asked him to turn around and asked if he would go in and get me some wine. At that point, I noticed, for the first time... dude had a limp.

Ironically, a decade earlier, on my birthday, I ALSO went on a first date with a guy with a limp. He paid that time and he gave me a teddy bear... so you know, slightly better circumstances.

Anyway, 08 guy comes out with two bottles of wine (I paid for it) and I had to my house with plans of drinking myself to sleep. At this point, I notice he has a Yoda keychain. His nickname will be (and is) YodaKeychainBoy or YKB.

YKB asks to sit and chat as I drink and he starts to make a few moves. I literally tell him, "sweetie, no offense, but I'm not drunk enough to do that yet. Wait until I open the second bottle to try anything if you want a shot."

More talking, during which time, YKB reveals such gems as a belief in The Illuminati as running the world and some other stuff which really doesn't mesh with my world view. He tries to kiss me again and I let him, because it is less annoying than hearing his conspiracy rants.

I go into the house, call the boy I have a crush on who happens to be awaiting a delayed flight in Vegas. I tell him I might bang YKB and he says I should "go for it whore." "Whore" was purely affectionate... so, I decide not to sleep with YKB as it might offend my imaginary relationship with Vegas crush boy.

I went to ask YKB to go home for the night. About 45 seconds into my conversation... my body rebelled. Obese as it may be, is not equipped to process mass amounts of alcohol so after a bottle and a half of wine, I became violently ill. YKB was sweet enough to stay, clean up a little, and make sure I didn't die in my sleep. He really was a nice guy... just not for me.

The next morning, since I'm hardcore, I decided I'd try to go to work. I made it about a half mile down the road and had to open my car door to vomit at a red light. I ended up at my primary care doctor's office projectile puking for 3 hours until he gave me a shot for a migraine.

In all fairness to my drunk ass, I'd had allergy tests the day before and it's more likely that all of those allergens made me that sick than the wine. Still... YKB offered to come take care of me later that day which was super sweet. 

Good guy. Horrible date. Very awkward. I tried to drink to make it tolerable or alter my memory of the lameness of the night... but that backfired in a disgusting way.

I need a happier dating track record.


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## OneWickedAngel (Aug 22, 2010)

Date??? What the hell is that? I haven't been on a date in over a year! Hell I haven't been to a meet a greet in a year.


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## thirtiesgirl (Aug 22, 2010)

BBW4Chattery, I don't mean to taint your perspective of the guy, but in my mind, it sounds like an awful date. That whole "oh no, I left my wallet at home" thing? Please. What a douche. Doing nothing but talking about his conspiracy theories and his interests? I mean, come _on_. It's a date, dude. Ask the girl some questions about _herself_. Don't just bore her with _your_ interests. He sounds like he was seriously off his dating game. I also don't appreciate it when a guy makes moves on me on a first date. That usually tells me he's mostly interested in sex and not really interested in getting to know me. Then again, I don't do the casual sex thing any more because I've found it doesn't get me what I want in the long run. It may work for some folks, but I've found it doesn't work for me. ...Anyway, I wouldn't have tolerated it, especially from a guy who'd obviously expected me to pay for the meal. (Yeah, right, he "forgot" his wallet. Ugh. That just makes me so angry.)

As a cautionary measure, I also never let a guy pick me up on a first date. I'll drive myself and meet him in a public place. I don't like the idea of getting in a car with a guy I don't know well, have never met in person, and only know him online. I won't go to his house or invite him to mine either on a first date. I make sure I take care of myself and don't flirt with the chance of something potentially dangerous and damaging happening.


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## LovelyLiz (Sep 9, 2010)

My most recent date was last night, and it was good. 

At the last minute I had asked this guy if he wanted to grab dinner, and picked a random place in between us where we could meet. (We had been out once before - last week, but had met a couple of times in a group as well, months before.) The restaurant we met at was a place I'd never been to, but it looked casual and inexpensive from what I saw online, which is kind of what I was aiming for. But when we got there, the place was super packed and tiny with lots of florescent lighting (not really a nice place for a leisurely dinner and conversation). So he suggested another place nearby, and said I could follow him there.

The place turned out to be a very nice restaurant atop a high hill, overlooking the city lights. I wasn't really prepared for such a date-y evening, but it was such a lovely place with such a great view that it was pretty easy to just roll with it. We had a good time just talking, and overall he was very respectful and kind and generous toward me in a way I have not experienced in much of my dating life lately. We had some good prime rib, split a bottle of wine, and then went outside and sat on their patio that has fire pits. The conversation was good, and he was able to track with my thoughts and ideas in a way I haven't experienced on a date in a while. Plus he's just an interesting person in general and is easy to be around.

Anyway, it was a good time, and I look forward to going out with him again.


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## littlefairywren (Sep 10, 2010)

mcbeth said:


> My most recent date was last night, and it was good.
> 
> At the last minute I had asked this guy if he wanted to grab dinner, and picked a random place in between us where we could meet. (We had been out once before - last week, but had met a couple of times in a group as well, months before.) The restaurant we met at was a place I'd never been to, but it looked casual and inexpensive from what I saw online, which is kind of what I was aiming for. But when we got there, the place was super packed and tiny with lots of florescent lighting (not really a nice place for a leisurely dinner and conversation). So he suggested another place nearby, and said I could follow him there.
> 
> ...



Oh, that sounds sooo nice! I am looking forward to you going out with him again too lol. I am really happy you had yourself a good one, mcbeth!!


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## Inhibited (Sep 10, 2010)

The person i met today was just the nicest, sweetest person, i so hope he wasn't being fake, i didn't get that vibe about him though, seems genuine and real..


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## littlefairywren (Sep 10, 2010)

Inhibited said:


> The person i met today was just the nicest, sweetest person, i so hope he wasn't being fake, i didn't get that vibe about him though, seems genuine and real..



Woot! Fingers crossed for you, hon. We could do with some happy stories around here


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## Dibaby35 (Sep 10, 2010)

Last date I was on was a few months back. Sort of a blind date thing was set up by a mutual friend. Anyways went to chilis. It's funny how you can tell almost immediately if someone is into you or not. Well he was not. Even though we did have a good chat and all. I was obviously not the eye candy he was looking for. Anyways he kept on mentioning his bad financial situation (like mine is so great..lol) so I just offered to pay for my half of the meal when the bill came and of course he took me up on it. I'm too nice I know..lol. Oh well..sigh.


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## LovelyLiz (Sep 10, 2010)

littlefairywren said:


> Oh, that sounds sooo nice! I am looking forward to you going out with him again too lol. I am really happy you had yourself a good one, mcbeth!!



Thank you, LFW, me too! After a short string of interchangeable narcissists, it was a nice change of pace.


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## CarlaSixx (Sep 10, 2010)

I've had 2 recent dates, lol.

One went pretty good. It was refreshing to meet with someone who wanted a strong conversation. But it'll only be as friends from here on in. He'd make a great one! He's great to converse with. Even my friends liked him.

The other one was 2 nights ago, lol. Met up at a friend's place and we were "cuddle buddies" lol. It didn't last long. Mostly cuz we were catching up with my friend or chasing after a dog or one of the little girls (such troublemakers  ) So we got maybe 20 minutes in on the couch and I had to go out the door  But now I really want to watch the rest of Zombieland!


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## Inhibited (Sep 10, 2010)

littlefairywren said:


> Woot! Fingers crossed for you, hon. We could do with some happy stories around here



I don't think anything is gonna come of it, don't think he saw me as someone he could be with long term, but hopefully we can stay in contact and be friends..


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## Aria Bombshell (Sep 11, 2010)

MY most recent date was 100% platonic. Since he had never been to the drive-in movies, I told him I'd take him. We got some yummy take-out and smuggled it in, and it was a nice time. It rained though, so that made it slightly annoying to try to watch the movie. Because it was a good friend and not a date date, there were not awkward moments or anything, so it was a really nice time


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## GTAFA (Sep 11, 2010)

Aria Bombshell said:


> MY most recent date was 100% platonic. Since he had never been to the drive-in movies, I told him I'd take him. We got some yummy take-out and smuggled it in, and it was a nice time. It rained though, so that made it slightly annoying to try to watch the movie. Because it was a good friend and not a date date, there were not awkward moments or anything, so it was a really nice time



I wonder if friendship might be making a comeback? i've had a couple of meetings with people who are clearly in that platonic track, without the stress of a date, and a surprising amount of fun. When all else fails, we gotta have fun, right? In other words, i haven't had anything i'd call a "date" in awhile. 

HA, at least it reduces the stress level.


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## thatgirl08 (Jan 11, 2011)

I decided to revive this thread for two reason:.

1. I love hearing other peoples dating stories.

2. I recently met someone and have gone on two awesome dates with him in the past few days and I need someone to gush to.


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## LovelyLiz (Jan 11, 2011)

thatgirl08 said:


> I decided to revive this thread for two reason:.
> 
> 1. I love hearing other peoples dating stories.
> 
> 2. I recently met someone and have gone on two awesome dates with him in the past few days and I need someone to gush to.



THANK YOU for reviving it!!!! I have been wanting to revive it too, for the same reasons. Well, except the gushing part...my dates are upcoming, so who knows how they will actually turn out. 

So...girl...gush away! Let's hear it.


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## thatgirl08 (Jan 13, 2011)

Okay! 

So, I answered his ad on Craigslist. I'm kind of wary of CL because people are mostly just looking for sex but I saw his ad and figured I'd give it a shot. We emailed back & forth for awhile and he seemed really sweet so we traded numbers. 

We met for coffee on Saturday. We talked for like five hours.. he's so interesting.. and cute.. and we have a lotttt in common. We also realized that we know like a ton of the same people. He said I looked familiar to him and that he thinks he may have met me at a party before but I don't remember him.. but still, small world!

He asked me to go see Black Swan on Monday after I got out of work, so we did (good movie btw.) Afterward we were standing by my car talking and we kissed.. it was so cute!

Anddd he just asked me to go out to dinner and bowling tonight after he gets out of work. I'm really excited .. I definitely see potential with him. I'll report back!

ETA: He's not an FA, and although I went on dates with a few non-FAs earlier this year, I definitely haven't actually felt compatible with one since I like, 16. We actually talked about weight though, and I won't get into details but we are more or less on the same page. It's nice to go on a date with someone who isn't just trying to get into my pants.


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## graphicsgal (Jan 13, 2011)

My last date was wonderful. Dinner and talking. I just love talking to the guy i went with. But then, the world crashed and we aren't talking any more.


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## snuggletiger (Jan 13, 2011)

Had a nice date last week. A good friend of mine and I went out for chinese food. Great food, lots of laughs.


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## thatgirl08 (Jan 14, 2011)

Dinner & bowling went really well! :]


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## thatgirl08 (Jan 19, 2011)

So, that guy & I are now officially 'together.' I know it's soon but we've seen each other a bunch of times since we met and I've totally fallen in like with him. I didn't think it was going to happen this fast but .. it just did. & I'm thrilled.


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## LovelyLiz (Jan 19, 2011)

thatgirl08 said:


> So, that guy & I are now officially 'together.' I know it's soon but we've seen each other a bunch of times since we met and I've totally fallen in like with him. I didn't think it was going to happen this fast but .. it just did. & I'm thrilled.



Yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!! That is so wonderful to hear.  Glad you're happy, and I'm glad you two are enjoying each other. He's a lucky guy!


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## HeavyDuty24 (Jan 19, 2011)

argh wish i had a recent date.>.>


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## WVMountainrear (Jan 19, 2011)

mcbeth said:


> THANK YOU for reviving it!!!! I have been wanting to revive it too, for the same reasons. Well, except the gushing part...my dates are upcoming, so who knows how they will actually turn out.
> 
> So...girl...gush away! Let's hear it.





thatgirl08 said:


> So, that guy & I are now officially 'together.' I know it's soon but we've seen each other a bunch of times since we met and I've totally fallen in like with him. I didn't think it was going to happen this fast but .. it just did. & I'm thrilled.



I really like this thread too! Hearing other people's dating stories is always so great. I have lots of "war stories" of my own, but it's nice to know you're not alone in the single and dating world. 

Congratulations on finding someone, thatgirl! The beginning of a new relationship always feels so wonderful.

I wish I could remember the last time I had a proper date-- I mean an outing that I would classify as an actual date. I've been thinking about re-posting my internet personal ad, so maybe I'll have something more substantive to share soon.


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## AmazingAmy (Jan 19, 2011)

thatgirl08 said:


> So, that guy & I are now officially 'together.' I know it's soon but we've seen each other a bunch of times since we met and I've totally fallen in like with him. I didn't think it was going to happen this fast but .. it just did. & I'm thrilled.




Awwww I love seeing people on Dims have good fortune. I hope everything keeps going well for you! It sound so romantic.:happy:


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## thatgirl08 (Jan 20, 2011)

Thank you all!


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