# Ladies, are you a cradle robber? Guys, enjoyed being robbed?



## AnnMarie (Apr 30, 2007)

So, was just chatting with another Dimmer regarding the ins and outs of good ol' cradle robbing - for women to be the robbers, that is. 

So, this thread is for ladies who rob cradles to discuss (issues/joys/stigmas) and for men who enjoy the older wimmins! What do you like about them, etc?

Share your stories, your biggest "rob" or "robbee" age difference, etc. 

I'll add in my thoughts in a bit (but I'm a robber in a general sense, it just tends to happen). 

(This isn't a dating thread, it's just for discussion of the older women/younger men thing.)


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## MissToodles (Apr 30, 2007)

no, I'm a cane snatcher.

oh snap!


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## AnnMarie (Apr 30, 2007)

MissToodles said:


> no, I'm a cane snatcher.
> 
> oh snap!



LOL... start your own thread!!


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## SoVerySoft (Apr 30, 2007)

Ummm...I could be accused of robbing it right now. But it isn't my usual m.o. tho I do tend to find myself in non-traditional relationships, so I guess I'm open minded!

It's still very new, so I am still working on getting my footing (that cradle is wobbly! ) but things are going really well.

Maybe I'll be brave enough to post the age difference - but I'm curious - what does everyone consider a big enough age spread to fit the cradle robber profile?

View attachment 006-Me and D-6sm3.jpg​


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## Fish (Apr 30, 2007)

How do you ROB a cradle when you're invited in? Begged, practically.


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## BubbleButtBabe (Apr 30, 2007)

Yea I rob the cradle a lot..Matter of fact I do not even look at men my age except to tell Misty the man is way to old for her..I have been dating younger men since I got a divorce 24 years ago and enjoying every moment of it..

In my case I get hit on by the younger guy..They usually make the first move except in a couple of cases,it was me doing the instigating! I see nothing wrong with spending time with younger men,I just have one rule..I do not go as young as my children..I stay older then Misty but still younger..

My biggest robbing hasn't happened yet but it will...It is going to be an over 10 year difference..10 years is usually as young as I go but I have seen a younger man that I would love to spend quality time with! 

When I first dated a younger guy he lied to me and told me he was just 2 years younger then me..Come to find out he was 6 years younger then me..I was shocked at first but soon got over it and have a lot of fun with him..From there I didn't feel remorse over looking and dating younger men..Men my age are usually couch potatoes and very boring..I want to have fun before my life is over and to do that I normally need some one younger with some git up and go!

I wont stop..Hell when I am so old I can barely see I will be looking at the young ones and thinking to myself," Damn I wanna be around when he gets a lil bit older!".....LOL


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## AnnMarie (Apr 30, 2007)

Fish said:


> How do you ROB a cradle when you're invited in? Begged, practically.



I think that's an excellent point, maybe you GUYS are just cane snatchers like Miss T said!! 

Randi, I think I consider it cradle robbing if it's over 10 years I think. I could easily change my mind with the right example, but I think anything less is probably not seen as quite so "odd" by others. 

My biggest year spread in robbing is 16... eek!!! Mostly it doesn't stick in my mind when it's happening, only when things come up that are points of reference like movies and songs and stuff. If you're dating a guy who remembers being 10 when Independence Day came out... it's FREAKY. But the rest of the time it's not really a big deal as long as your interests and likes mesh up. 

I've dated guys much closer to my age (like only 8-9 years younger), and a couple that were either my age or a couple of years older, so it's not something that I seek out really. But hey, if they're a good person, fun, interesting, and they like you.... who are you to toss it aside? At least that's what I'm always trying to tell myself. 

:blush:


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## BubbleButtBabe (Apr 30, 2007)

AnnMarie you are telling yourself the right thing..Age now is not that big of a deal..It is only if the young man in question is interested in being a parent and those days are gone for you,you need to leave them alone and let them find that,but to have fun with Oh Hell Yea give me a yougen!


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## Blackjack (Apr 30, 2007)

I leave the lock off of my cradle for a reason.

:batting:


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## AnnMarie (Apr 30, 2007)

BubbleButtBabe said:


> AnnMarie you are telling yourself the right thing..Age now is not that big of a deal..It is only if the young man in question is interested in being a parent and those days are gone for you,you need to leave them alone and let them find that,but to have fun with Oh Hell Yea give me a yougen!



Yeah, I agree with that. And I have to deal with that kid thing no matter what for now. I can technically have them, but have no intention or desire to do so.


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## bigsexy920 (Apr 30, 2007)

I dated a guy that was 8 years younger than me I was 31 he was 23. We had fun I now have a better appreciation for viedo games. In the end he felt I was more ready to settle down, which I was but he wasn't. NOW he's got 2 kids.... go figure.

I don't think age is an issue. I think if you are both attracted to each other and you have some common interests.


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## Fish (Apr 30, 2007)

AnnMarie said:


> I think that's an excellent point, maybe you GUYS are just cane snatchers like Miss T said!!



Geez, I've never even considered that, but I've only ever dated ONE woman younger than me. Maybe I AM a "Cane Snatcher"!?!


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## SoVerySoft (May 1, 2007)

Fish said:


> How do you ROB a cradle when you're invited in? Begged, practically.



Hmmm....good point. Oh good. It's all your fault.



Fish said:


> Geez, I've never even considered that, but I've only ever dated ONE woman younger than me. Maybe I AM a "Cane Snatcher"!?!



I don't have a cane. Can I lean on you?


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## Sandie_Zitkus (May 1, 2007)

Randi no matter how young he is you both look very happy and adorable together!


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## Theatrmuse/Kara (May 1, 2007)

Ummmm.....well......<blushing>

Seventeen years difference...........long story but long lasting love.


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## SoVerySoft (May 1, 2007)

Sandie_Zitkus said:


> Randi no matter how young he is you both look very happy and adorable together!



Thanks so much Sandie! I think we do too


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## SoVerySoft (May 1, 2007)

Theatrmuse/Kara said:


> Ummmm.....well......<blushing>
> 
> Seventeen years difference...........long story but long lasting love.



long story? we've got time  

so....?


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## AnnMarie (May 1, 2007)

Theatrmuse/Kara said:


> Ummmm.....well......<blushing>
> 
> Seventeen years difference...........long story but long lasting love.



Okay, I'm with Randi... I've got PLENTY of time, and since it's the ballpark of age difference I've had... I would LOVE to hear it.


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## Sandie_Zitkus (May 1, 2007)

I wouldn't mind a little 20-something slap and tickle on the side ------------ *NEVERMIND I keed I keed!* 

I'm gonna get shit or this I just know it


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## ScreamingChicken (May 1, 2007)

If for some unforseen reason that I found myself a single man again, I would date older women without hesitation. I'm on the verge of 33 and I can think of more than just a few ladies here in their mid to late 30's, 40's and 50's who are just sexy as hell.:smitten:


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## Seth Warren (May 1, 2007)

The girlfriend is ten years older than I am. 

Hard to rob from those more than willing to give it away.  A hottie is a hottie and if two people click, who cares about age (so long as they're legal)?


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## Theatrmuse/Kara (May 1, 2007)

OOOOOKay!

Met him when he was in early 20s and I was 40....fellow actor and friend. We were cast in several plays together and spent a TON of time together. When the shows closed, we missed each other and realized we wanted more!We had this mutual respect and admiration thing going on and once he convinced me....we lasted several years. This started during the time my hubby and I were separated for four years. My younger man wanted marriage and more children.....I just was not up to "birthing anymore babies"....was just starting my teaching and acting career and already had a 10 year old and 16 year old. Truth be told. even though my David and I have had our difficulties (which many of you know)......WE are soul mates and I just didn't want to commit to someone else in that 'forever' way.

THAT said, dang the sex was great. We still talk on the phone quite often and he is still in my heart....

I firmly believe that if two people enjoy each other and care for each other....age does NOT matter......only love matters.
Kara


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## Fish (May 1, 2007)

An age difference CAN be an obsticle to be sure, but some obsticles are worth overcoming if everything else clicks. Man, I love it when things click.


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## AnnMarie (May 1, 2007)

Theatrmuse/Kara said:


> OOOOOKay!
> 
> Met him when he was in early 20s and I was 40....fellow actor and friend. We were cast in several plays together and spent a TON of time together. When the shows closed, we missed each other and realized we wanted more!We had this mutual respect and admiration thing going on and once he convinced me....we lasted several years. This started during the time my hubby and I were separated for four years. My younger man wanted marriage and more children.....I just was not up to "birthing anymore babies"....was just starting my teaching and acting career and already had a 10 year old and 16 year old. Truth be told. even though my David and I have had our difficulties (which many of you know)......WE are soul mates and I just didn't want to commit to someone else in that 'forever' way.
> 
> ...



Wow, Kara, very interesting story, thanks so much for sharing it. Certainly food for thought!


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## BothGunsBlazing (May 1, 2007)

I don't know, lately I've had some older lady type urges.


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## Sandie_Zitkus (May 1, 2007)

Well thanks darlin. (I couldn't resist LOL) 




ScreamingChicken said:


> If for some unforseen reason that I found myself a single man again, I would date older women without hesitation. I'm on the verge of 33 and I can think of more than just a few ladies here in their mid to late 30's, 40's and 50's who are just sexy as hell.:smitten:


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## AnnMarie (May 1, 2007)

Thanks to the guys who've chimed in, I like hearing from you because it certainly makes the "guilty" side of the "robbing" idea seem a bit less real. As you say, it's hard to rob the willing. 

I think part of the issue is that when you're older and dealing with someone younger you feel responsible - MORE responsible - because it's almost like you should know more or better or something. I don't know, it doesn't really make sense, but I think that's part of the little voice in my head, like... if this blows up it's definitely MY fault because I'm the one who's old enough that I "should know better". Even if I don't really think there's anything wrong with it.


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## SoVerySoft (May 1, 2007)

Theatrmuse/Kara said:


> OOOOOKay!
> 
> Met him when he was in early 20s and I was 40....fellow actor and friend. We were cast in several plays together and spent a TON of time together. When the shows closed, we missed each other and realized we wanted more!We had this mutual respect and admiration thing going on *and once he convinced me*....we lasted several years. This started during the time my hubby and I were separated for four years. My younger man wanted marriage and more children.....I just was not up to "birthing anymore babies"....was just starting my teaching and acting career and already had a 10 year old and 16 year old. Truth be told. even though my David and I have had our difficulties (which many of you know)......WE are soul mates and I just didn't want to commit to someone else in that 'forever' way.
> 
> ...




Kara, thanks for sharing that! I can really relate to "...once he convinced me..." (I made it bold above) since there was quite a bit of that in my current situation. 

I'm hoping you're right that age does not matter - only love matters...


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## PhillyFA (May 1, 2007)

When I was 19, I started fooling around with a 41 year old co-worker. She showed me things I could never have thought of myself LOL. We had a lot of fun together, and I don't mean just in bed. I was in love with her, but knew she could never be mine. She was married, had 2 kids. I still keep in touch with her to this day.


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## Tina (May 1, 2007)

Some might not consider 7 years to be a big deal (Big is 7 years younger than I), but I used to seem to only go for guys who were older than I, though not a lot older. As time has gone on I am less and less concerned with age difference.


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## missaf (May 1, 2007)

I had a fling with a 50 year old when I was 26. It was kinda weird at first, because of the generation gap, but we both were naturally curious about each other's interests, it made for some nice conversation, and I'm now a lover of impressionistic and abstract art and can see more thanks to his guidance


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## eightyseven (May 1, 2007)

In any relationship between two people with a moderately significant age difference, I just think that there needs to be a great deal of maturity on both ends since there's bound to be varying perspectives on and ideas about life, future, and how to approach things. That being said, I do believe that true feelings for each other can most definitely exist despite that and make for a fantastic (and probably really exciting) relationship.

So yeah... my cradle is open for some robbing


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## Blackjack_Jeeves (May 1, 2007)

Nothing ever serious came from it, but I once had a 40'ish year old mother of 1 talk to me on Yahoo. I bumped into her playing bingo one night, and somehow impressed her with my manners. Through our talks (lasted maybe a month or two) I realized two things. 1: She was somehow interested in me, and 2: She was in the midst of marraige problems. She was very kind, and I can't really say I was interested in her that way. She was just someone nice to talk to. I soon clarified this, which was fine because soon after I learned that she and her husband were working to patch things up. Last report, they were happy again, so good for them. Makes me wonder what her interest in me was......


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## Wagimawr (May 1, 2007)

eightyseven said:


> So yeah... my cradle is open for some robbing


What he said. I'm not opposed at all to being involved with an older woman.


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## Jon Blaze (May 1, 2007)

I've never dated anyone much older than me. However, I would say I'm open to it. I've seen ladies on here in their late 30s, early 40s that are.... well you know... :wubu: 
I don't think I would have relations with someone that is older or near my Mom's age (A modest 47), but I will try to keep myself open to someone between 19-30ishishish .

There's only one problem: I'm horribly inexperienced!! If she doesn't have a problem with that: ALLLLL RIGGGGHTTTTT!! 

So yea... I open to some robbing, but you have to teach me.


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## lemmink (May 1, 2007)

I've always gone for older guys; when I was 18 or so I was dating guys between 35-50... however, I'm now engaged to a wee slip of a boy who was barely 21 when I met him (to my 25). It's a 3.5 year difference, but the issue for me is that he's the same age as my kid brother. 

I expect that if he was a lot younger or a lot older there'd be no issue, but teh same as my brother? EWWW.


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## Friday (May 1, 2007)

I always dated older guys (10+ years) when I was young too lemmink. It seemed like all the guys my age were interested in mostly cars, pot, beer and ass (not necessarily in that order). As I got older the difference shrank and by the time I got permanent I was 36 and he was 30. Whatever works works in my book.


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## Ample Pie (May 1, 2007)

I tend to be a cradle robber, in fact that was my user title thingie just a couple of days back. My last boyfriend was 19 and I'm 31. Yeah. 

That's also the biggest gap...though, when I was 19, I was dating a 39 y/o, so...whatever.

In simple terms, I like loud loud music, horror movies, tasteless jokes, and checking out other women, and while that isn't exclusive to guys younger than I am, it's something we have in common.

I have other reasons for liking younger guys, but I'm not sure I'm comfortable discussing them with people at large--at least not yet.


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## Violet_Beauregard (May 1, 2007)

Well, until recently, the most for me was 8 years younger.... but I just met someone VERY recently who is 10 years younger.... the age difference doesn't seem to be a big deal though. It's fun!


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## This1Yankee (May 1, 2007)

The youngest guy I've *sort of* dated, was 18. We didn't do anything physically, but the mutual attraction was there.

The youngest that I've REALLY dated, was 21. And that was interesting  Usually though, I am the robbee, not the robber.


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## Tracyarts (May 1, 2007)

Double cradle robber here... both the loves of my life are 6 and a half years younger than me.

Tracy


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## AnnMarie (May 1, 2007)

Thanks everyone, really interesting so far, I hope others see it and chime in with their robbing/robbee experiences.


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## Zandoz (May 1, 2007)

No personal experience one way or the other, myself, but I have had a ringside seat for about the last 9 years. Around 9 years ago, my cousin (mid 40s then) married the drummer in her son's band (mid/early 20s). She's definitely never been happier, and he generally has a smile on his face...LOL. They now run a very successful restaurant together.

My point of view boils down to "As long as both parties are legal and honest with each other, it's nobodies business but theirs".


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## Green Eyed Fairy (May 1, 2007)

LMAO- I'm too damned embarrassed to tell the age of the last guy I went out with  


*dirty old woman alert* *blushes*


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## Jack Skellington (May 1, 2007)

Older women are kewl.


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## GWARrior (May 1, 2007)

Is it wrong to go after a 16 yr old? What if he's really really cute, and looks older? Can I pretend hes 18 and get away with it?


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## liz (di-va) (May 1, 2007)

I guess I'd qualify as a robber. Some of it, as people have said, is about who's around, available, interested--at my age (40) right now the dating pool is dividing itself up in directions the way it didn't, say, five years ago. I'm finding more Older and Younger types, not as much my age, and seem to have more in common with younger, usually.

The youngest I ever dated, as in an actual relationship (this was long-distance), was I think 11 years younger. He qualified some for of the less fab stereotypes of the younger guy (flaky, cavalier), but I don't think there's anything inevitable about that. The longest relationship I think I've had was with somebody 8 years younger than I.

Age isn't necessarily meaningless, but it does seem to mean less as I get older. "Young" and "old"--both--can operate somewhat independent of number.

ETA: This reads, upon reflection, as a very careful way of just sayin, yeah, I like the younger dudes. Yeah, I like the younger dudes. Hah!


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## Paw Paw (May 1, 2007)

In the words of the late Benny Hill;

" I'll take an older woman every time,
every time,
They don't scream and they don't yell,
And they're graceful as hell,
I'll take an older woman every time!"

And thats all I got to say about that. But, at my age they is pretty damn old! 

Peace,
2P.


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## HDANGEL15 (May 1, 2007)

Green Eyed Fairy said:


> LMAO- I'm too damned embarrassed to tell the age of the last guy I went out with
> 
> 
> *dirty old woman alert* *blushes*



*I am with GEF...i have always dated *MUCH* Younger....I turned 50 this past december and thought my world would end? i know i know...its just a # thats what all the 20 + 30 somethings tell me..yes you read right....

my first though, he was probably in high school and lying while i was in my 40s til one a.m...he mentioned it was his 21st bday..and i was LIKE WTF!!!! I had thought he was in his 20s all along..suprise....

but honestly..i relate to men and women 1/2 or more my age...i am really athletic and outdoorsy..and go to see tons of live music and no one gives a damn that i am 10-20 or 30 years older...thank god its so vogue to dig us *OLDER HOTTIES * heehehe no ego here LMAO*


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## LillyBBBW (May 1, 2007)

I don't look for anything really. Sensibility is mostly what I look for in a person and that can come in any package. The youngest I've dated was 12 years younger. We were an item for about 3 years. I would date a younger guy in a second but again, it depends on personality.


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## rainyday (May 1, 2007)

I've short-term dated a couple guys who were younger, but in general I've gravitated toward men who were older than me. Because of longevity issues though, I'm not sure how open I'd be to that anymore. As for how young I'd go, it would depend on maturity and how confidently a younger guy handled himself since I find that appealing. I think ten years difference might be about my max.


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## Jane (May 1, 2007)

16 1/2 years younger (YES I DO HALF YEARS).

Men my age don't ask me out. Younger men do.


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## Tooz (May 1, 2007)

Well, I guess I am. It's not really by choice though. Ideally, I would like someone my age +- two years. It's not working out this way. My ex was 5 1/2 years or so younger than me. No, I would not normally date someone that much younger than me, but the circumstances were strange.


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## Green Eyed Fairy (May 1, 2007)

Jane said:


> 16 1/2 years younger (YES I DO HALF YEARS).
> 
> Men my age don't ask me out. Younger men do.




I hear that Jane, EXACTLY

OR

the men my age that actually do express any interest are usually married :doh:

I prefer a younger, unattached man over a man that lies to his wife.


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## Spanky (May 1, 2007)

GWARrior said:


> Is it wrong to go after a 16 yr old? What if he's really really cute, and looks older? Can I pretend hes 18 and get away with it?



You can if you look like this.


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## ripley (May 1, 2007)

I'm 35 and would date a younger guy...they tend to have more sexual experience than I do anyway so I consider us even, lol.


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## Ryan (May 1, 2007)

I don't really mind being "robbed" in this sense, but I'm not that picky about age. My girlfriend, TSL, is eight years younger than me. This doesn't bother me (or her) in the least. And I wouldn't be bothered if she was eight years older than me, either.


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## Ample Pie (May 1, 2007)

Green Eyed Fairy said:


> I hear that Jane, EXACTLY
> 
> OR
> 
> ...


Ditto on all accounts.


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## ashmamma84 (May 1, 2007)

Well, in my case I was robbed; as in I dated a woman who was 20 years older than me. It was fun while it lasted, but eventually it just had to stop. You live, you learn.


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## Ruby Ripples (May 1, 2007)

20 yrs younger, 17 yrs younger, 15 yrs younger... etc lol. Younger men are much more interested in me than guys my own age. Oldest was 11 yrs older than me. some 20 yr old men are MUCH more mature than some in their 40s. Age IS only a number, it's all about how the man is as a person. If you both want each other and are both free agents GO FOR IT!


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## AnnMarie (May 1, 2007)

Ahhh, all you _old_ cradle robber girls are making me feel much more at home. 

And honestly, I'm about as mature in my interests as a 20 year old, so it's not that bad, right??? 

:wubu:


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## Theatrmuse/Kara (May 1, 2007)

There ya go!!!!!!!!! LOL!


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## BubbleButtBabe (May 1, 2007)

I believe a woman should have 3 distinct men in her life..The *1st* one should be an older man to teach her the art of lovemaking...The *2nd*, the man that is to be the father of her children,if that marriage doesn't last or she is widowed I think the *3rd* should be a younger man to make her feel alive and attractive...

I am now on the lookout for number 3....LOL

BTW younger men please,if a lady does tell you that you are to young,please do not hound her to death about it! Be respectful and you never can tell she might change her mind!


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## alienlanes (May 1, 2007)

Haven't been robbed yet, but I don't take very strict security measures .


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## Ample Pie (May 1, 2007)

SlackerFA said:


> Haven't been robbed yet, but I don't take very strict security measures .


I can safely say, from my observations on the board, that you're probably in danger. Get an alarm system soon


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## sobie18 (May 2, 2007)

When I was 17, my first girlfriend was 35. That was cool. I was a little worried that my Dad would hit on her; that didn't happen, though. 

She did have a '70 GTO that was just awesome! Unreal car...

But yeah, I was robbed and enjoyed every minute of it...

Yee haw!


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## HDANGEL15 (May 2, 2007)

AnnMarie said:


> Ahhh, all you _old_ cradle robber girls are making me feel much more at home.
> 
> And honestly, I'm about as mature in my interests as a 20 year old, so it's not that bad, right???
> 
> :wubu:


*
thats my stance too.....i'm wiser, experienced and worldly.... but still way immature  *


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## swordchick (May 2, 2007)

I have robbed the craddle twice. It was about a ten year age difference for both. And I have been on the flip side as well. It was also a ten year age difference also. I do not have a preference though.


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## liz (di-va) (May 2, 2007)

This thread is just beggin to be cross-pollinated with the Callin All Youngsters thread. Snicker.


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## Theatrmuse/Kara (May 2, 2007)

LOLOL! Okay Liz..........rep coming your way for the first laugh of the day for me! Thanks! Hugs, Kara
PS: May I add that I am not presenting looking for ANY MAN of any age............like the one I got! LOL!


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## Paw Paw (May 2, 2007)

sobie18 said:


> When I was 17, my first girlfriend was 35. That was cool. I was a little worried that my Dad would hit on her; that didn't happen, though.
> 
> She did have a '70 GTO that was just awesome! Unreal car...
> 
> ...



When I was 18, I babysat for a 35 yo woman. One night, she came home a little buzzed. Started asking me about my sex life, and what I liked and stuff. I swallowed my nerves and replied" Let me show you. ".

Well I showed her, and she apparently told her friends. Next thing you know I was babysitting for sex. Great summer! We are still friends now. Just friends.

Peace,
2P.


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## rainyday (May 2, 2007)

LOL. Today's word on the UrbanDictionary.com word of the day subscription list:



> May 02, 2007: Urban Cougar
> 
> http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Urban+Cougar&defid=1397675
> 
> ...


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## AnnMarie (May 2, 2007)

rainyday said:


> LOL. Today's word on the UrbanDictionary.com word of the day subscription list:




Oh my Lord. 

I don't think I qualify as a cougar, I'm not trying to collect them.... I'm definitely a one at a time girl.


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## rainyday (May 2, 2007)

Yeah, I don't think it describes folks in this thread. I just thought the timing of it was pretty funny.


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## AnnMarie (May 2, 2007)

rainyday said:


> Yeah, I don't think it describes folks in this thread. I just thought the timing of it was pretty funny.



You're right, and I've definitely seen cougars. They roam at the dances from time to time.


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## Carrie (May 2, 2007)

I want to see someone change their user title here to "Urban Cougar".


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## GWARrior (May 2, 2007)

Sweet! The age of consent in MA is 16! He totally could pass for 18 though. 

*has dirty thoughts about a young horny male*


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## CurvaceousBBWLover (May 2, 2007)

I date women my age and I also date older women. My biggest age difference was 16 years. I find many different types of women to be sexy.

I don't feel that someone robbed me from the cradle. To be honest, dating the other person was a mutual decision.


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## Green Eyed Fairy (May 2, 2007)

Carrie said:


> I want to see someone change their user title here to "Urban Cougar".



Do you mean like this?


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## Seth Warren (May 2, 2007)

Green Eyed Fairy said:


> Do you mean like this?



Catnip?


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## alienlanes (May 3, 2007)

I have to admit: I'd eventually like to settle down with a housecat... but before that happens I wouldn't mind getting mauled by a cougar or two .


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## BBWTexan (May 3, 2007)

AnnMarie said:


> You're right, and I've definitely seen cougars. They roam at the dances from time to time.



They may roam the dances from time to time, but I believe they're actually indigenous creatures of the Ivanhoe.


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## LillyBBBW (May 3, 2007)

GWARrior said:


> Sweet! The age of consent in MA is 16! He totally could pass for 18 though.
> 
> *has dirty thoughts about a young horny male*



Get out of here!  Where did you read that? 16???


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## Ruby Ripples (May 3, 2007)

eww urban cougars.... Im def not one of those.


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## BeautifulPoeticDisaster (May 3, 2007)

I'm 18 months older than Mike I've always liked younger guys and he always has been with older women...so that's that.

Now my biggest rob, lol. High school. I was 17, he was 14. Only 3 years, BUT...in highschool that was like 10 years. And he looked older. At 14 he was 6'2" and 180....omg....hot hot hot. However, the relationship was highly dysfunctional and lasted on and off for 6 years. That guy caused a lot of damage in the end saying he couldn't be attracted me cos I wasn't like the porn stars he was used to.

But ANYWAYS, lol. I'm happy with my current rob....just enough space to make me feel dominant, lol.


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## This1Yankee (May 3, 2007)

I went out to dinner with my roomie last night, and on the paper placemats, they had the chinese astrology signs. I am a boar (re: pig...*snort*) and it specifically said that I should marry within the sign Rabbit or Sheep (no jokes about me marrying a Sheep please, those that know me personally). So if I married according to Chinese astrology, I would be with someone either 5 years older than me, or 4 years my junior. I am destined to be a robber or a robbee.

Check yours here


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## HugKiss (May 3, 2007)

I love younger guys!!!!!!! I date guys up to 20 years younger then myself. My long term relationships have been with men closer to my age. Tried dating men my age or older and it just doesn't work for me. I think the major age gap works well for casual dating but for a steady relationship I usually choose someone within 8 or 10 years younger.

Am I a cougar? GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!! :eat2:

HugKiss :kiss2:


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## Sandie S-R (May 3, 2007)

When I was dating, I dated men from 16 years older to 7 years younger than me. Age has never been an issue. Compatability, honesty and common interests are. Guy and I have been together 14 years, and he is 11 months younger than I am...which is really no difference at all.

If I were single and dating, I would have no problem in dating a younger man (like 10 15 years younger). Especially if we exceptionally compatable.


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## GWARrior (May 3, 2007)

LillyBBBW said:


> Get out of here!  Where did you read that? 16???



right here...

http://www.avert.org/aofconsent.htm


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## Tina (May 3, 2007)

Interesting resource. Thanks GWAR.


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## bbwsweetheart (May 18, 2007)

It's great that most people on Dims have a liberal view in terms of most everything, including older women/younger men.

Just curious...have friends, family, the guy's family ever given anyone who's had a realtionship with a younger guy a hard time regarding the age difference? 


Thank you.


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## alienlanes (May 18, 2007)

bbwsweetheart said:


> It's great that most people on Dims have a liberal view in terms of most everything, including older women/younger men.
> 
> Just curious...have friends, family, the guy's family ever given anyone who's had a realtionship with a younger guy a hard time regarding the age difference?
> 
> ...



Heh. It's actually a running joke among my cousins and uncles on my dad's side that most of the guys in the extended family tend to go for older women. One of my cousins met a woman in her early thirties one summer when he was working as a lifeguard. She asked him whether he was in school, and he said "yeah, I'm a senior." They dated for several months before she realized that he meant a senior in _high school_ ... and stayed together for several years after that. So if I ever bring home an urban cougar, nobody's gonna mind .


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## BeaBea (May 18, 2007)

Umm, I'm a definite robber. I'm 39, and my most recent relationships have been with men 7 years, 11 years and 13 years younger than me. It doesn't bother me at all. I get teased by my family but they certainly dont have any issues with it. My friends give me slightly more grief but they admit they are jealous too  

The defining point that would put me off is if I was alone with and we felt like different ages. All the time the two of us can spend time together and it not even raise it's head then it's fine. I have to say from the three relationships I mentioned above, in two of them the man was the definite 'grown-up' out of the two us. They were both stay at home types whereas I was wanting to go out and party.

As for older men, well I certainly dont object to the idea, but they dont seem to ask me out. If anyone knows how you attract a Sugar Daddy could they pass the info on?

Tracey xx


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## eightyseven (May 18, 2007)

You know, I've always felt that 19 was an awkward age. I'm technically an "adult" in just about every sense of the term except socially, though never assumed to be mature or independent.

I have to say though... reading this thread has made me feel SO much better about my age


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## Ample Pie (May 18, 2007)

My best friend thinks it's odd, but she tries really hard not to. It's funny because I know she loves me and supports me, seriously, but I also know that when she saw me with my last boyfriend (again, he's 19 and I'm 31), she would still sort of shake her head and make nervous jokes, which I knew were meant to help make her more comfortable. It wasn't that she disapproved, it's that she just wasn't used to it...

She's also worried I'll steal her sons away the moment they turn 18.

She may be right...mwahahahaha.

Okay, not really.


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## bbwsweetheart (May 20, 2007)

May-December love affairs have always piqued our curiosity, but theyre especially titillating when May is the gent, December is the lady and both are famous.

Such younger men/older women romances are all the more captivating when May is 27-year-old Ashton Kutcher (search), December is 42-year-old Demi Moore (search) and there are three children and a secret wedding in the mix.

"The power and potency of an attractive woman like Demi, who could have anyone for a husband, and all the beautiful young models and starlets Ashton could have  it is a big statement," Susan Winter, co-author of the 2000 book "Older Women, Younger Men," (search) said of the marriage.

Judging from all the attention the lovebirds get and the fact that more TV shows and movies have older women/younger men relationships in their storylines  like "Prime" (search), which opens this weekend  the phenomenon obviously still fascinates people.

"It's always been sort of taboo, because our traditional image of a relationship is that the man would be older and the woman a little bit younger," said Albert Lee, senior editor at Us Weekly. "It's always going to cause a little bit of intrigue."

But it's also becoming more accepted.

Hollywood is just going to reflect reality, and the reality is that on and off the screen, people are having these Ashton-Demi types of relationships, Lee said. It may be less scandalous, but its still going to be talked about  just because its against the norm.

After a 2 1/2-year courtship, Kutcher and Moore tied the knot last month in a hush-hush ceremony. It's the first marriage for Kutcher and the third for Moore, who was married for almost 13 years to Bruce Willis (search), with whom she has three children, and to rocker Freddie Moore (search) from 1980 to 1984.

Since the current Mr. and Mrs. Moore got together, the tabloids, paparazzi, entertainment media and general public have been mesmerized.

"Talk about meeting your soul mate," the actress told Harper's Bazaar in its September issue. "I truly feel I have been given that gift."

She also addressed her age in the interview, though didn't say much about the age difference between her and Kutcher.

"It's been a challenging few years, being the age I am, with so much focus now on how I look," Moore told the magazine.

Moore and Kutcher also spoofed the gap on "Saturday Night Live," with Moore playing an elderly woman to Kutcher's young stud. Kutcher has even been talking about producing a sitcom pilot loosely based on their relationship.

Despite the press' and fans' particular obsession with them, Ashton and Demi are certainly not the only couple of their kind in Hollywood. Some broke the mold years ago, such as 59-year-old Susan Sarandon (search) and 47-year-old Tim Robbins (search).

"Age hasn't been a factor," Robbins told Playboy in 1995. "Each person is who they are. I've met young women who are old; I've met older women who are young."

Couples with comparable age gaps are actually a growing throng: Cameron Diaz (search), 33, and Justin Timberlake (search), 24; Madonna (search), 47, and Guy Ritchie (search), 37; Barbara Hershey (search), 57, and Naveen Andrews (search), 36; Geena Davis (search), 49, and Reza Jarrahy (search), 34; Courteney Cox (search), 41, and David Arquette (search), 34; Julianne Moore (search), 44, and Bart Freundlich (search), 35; Sheryl Crow (search), 43, and Lance Armstrong (search), 34; and Francesca Annis (search), 61, and Ralph Fiennes (search), 42, among others.

"I've always been attracted to older women," Andrews told the London Daily Mail this year. "They look infinitely better to me."

Davis joked about the age difference between her and her husband when they got engaged in 2000, saying their maturity levels compensated.

"I'm 44 going on 29, and he's 29 going on 32, so I'm the young one in this relationship," Inside TV quoted her as saying then.

Not all the relationships work out  take Naomi Watts (search), now 37, and Heath Ledger (search), now 26, who split last year  but then again, Hollywood romances are inclined to be fleeting, whether several years separate the couple or not.

In the movies, the "older woman" theme has been slinking into the occasional film at least since "Sunset Blvd." (1950) and most famously with the legendary Mrs. Robinson (search) in "The Graduate" (1967).

"Tadpole" (2002), "American Pie" (1999), "Gosford Park" (2001), "Dangerous Liaisons" (1988) and a smattering of other films have also woven the "sexy mature woman" thread into their plots  but they haven't usually been flattering portrayals.

"In the movies, their angle has been slanted toward the older woman who's pathetic or manipulative or she loses out," said Winter, whose book with Felicia Brings was inspired by relationships both writers had with younger men.

But now the new film "Prime"  starring Uma Thurman (search) as the "mature woman" (whose character, Rafi, is all of 37); Bryan Greenberg (search) as her younger, 23-year-old boyfriend, Dave; and Meryl Streep (search) as her therapist, Lisa  is a romantic comedy that's all about such a relationship.

And in this case, there's no trace of the seductress, the manipulator or the desperate has-been in Rafi, or the goofy, immature man-child in Dave.

"It was very current. It reflects what's going on now in society," said Clarissa Cruz, a staff writer at Entertainment Weekly. "Older women these days are in shape, they're sexy, they're vibrant, they have these great careers ...

"Uma Thurman is hot. There's no question why he would be attracted to her. And it's not like he is the boy toy, either."

The movie "Proof"  based on the well-known play by the film's screenwriter David Auburn and starring Gwyneth Paltrow (search), Jake Gyllenhaal (search) and Anthony Hopkins (search)  has Paltrow's and Gyllenhaal's characters in such a relationship, though it's not the central plot. And TV shows have also been tackling this kind of May-December romance with increasing frequency.

On "Sex and the City" (search), Samantha (Kim Cattrall) has a serious, lasting, loving relationship with a much younger man whom she is still with when the show ends. On "Desperate Housewives" (search), Eva Longoria (search)'s character, the bored-and-married Gabrielle Solis, has a love affair with the very young gardener John Rowland, played by Jesse Metcalfe (search). Kutcher's sitcom, if it happens, would be another addition to the genre.

"It's becoming more acceptable, and films and TV shows are responding to that," Cruz said.

But the older women/younger men trend certainly wasn't always OK.

"It really was another story before: It wasn't, 'You go girl!'; it was, 'You get out of town, girl!'" White said. "They would never ask a man about a 15- to 20-year age difference when he's older."

There is still something of a double standard, with less shock and fewer questions when older men and much younger women wind up together. And movies continue to incorporate the more common kind of age differential, like "Shopgirl," in which Steve Martin's 50-something Ray has a relationship with Claire Danes' 20-something Mirabelle.

Still, older women have been pairing up with younger men in the real world and offscreen in Hollywood for ages (pardon the pun).

"To state the obvious, men and women hit their sexual peak at different ages. A lot of these kinds of relationships have a lot to do with that," Lee said. "And a lot of men are attracted to older women. The older woman has poise, is more confident and can teach the younger man how to be an adult, not just sexually but emotionally."

John Brandt, a 23-year-old production assistant for FOX News in Washington, said when he first met his now 32-year-old girlfriend, he didn't know how old she was. But when he found out, he said, "I was kind of surprised for a moment, but I just got over it. It wasn't that big a deal."

And the gap hasn't detracted from the relationship at all. If anything, it's enhanced it, according to Brandt.

"We have the same maturity level and shared interests," he said. "She's more confident, she knows what she wants. I don't have time to play guessing games. ... She's definitely the best girlfriend I've ever had, by a long shot. She's awesome."

And if films like "Prime" and couples like Demi and Ashton are doing anything for those of us commonfolk, it's making the updated May-Decembers less forbidden.

Said Winter: "Hollywood does liberate us, because they are not held to the rules of this world."


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## Fish (May 20, 2007)

It's not something I think about much. And it's certainly not something I seek out, although seeing women older than me... signifigantly... is not new to me. I don't quite know WHY I become drawn to older women and I honestly don't try and disect it too much.

When I AM thinking about it, it's usually just because I'm taking my current relationship very seriously and I KNOW it's a source of major concern to her. It's a realistic obsticle for anything long term, but one I'm MORE than willing to scale.


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## blueeyedevie (May 20, 2007)

So I love this thread, and while it does not solve the problem in the *relaionship* it sure makes me fell a hell of alot better. Exactly 10 year differnece. When I am 40, he will be 30. As it is he is 19 and I am 28 ( 29 ) in about 2 month.The problem mentioned, hearing his mother say "She's fat is one thing but hearing her call me old *OLD AT 28* is something totally in another ball field. :doh: I think in general I would perfer to fall in love with men *my age* are older. It just didn't happen that way.


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## BeaBea (May 20, 2007)

blueeyedevie said:


> I think in general I would perfer to fall in love with men *my age* are older. It just didn't happen that way.



Evie, love is just love  It never happens when you want it to and sometimes happens when it probably shouldn't. It doesn't have to make sense to anyone but the two of you!

And as for men's Mothers... Lol, If it wasn't your age it might well be something else. Sometimes the apron strings are as strong as steel hawsers. I once had a boyfriends Mother try to stab me with a pair of scissors but thats a whole 'nother story...!

Tracey xx


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## TCUBOB (May 20, 2007)

Given my druthers, I would prefer to end up with someone my age or older....probably older, but I'm not going to turn anyone down..... That's just foolish....


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## Waxwing (May 20, 2007)

Rebecca said:


> My best friend thinks it's odd, but she tries really hard not to. It's funny because I know she loves me and supports me, seriously, but I also know that when she saw me with my last boyfriend (again, he's 19 and I'm 31), she would still sort of shake her head and make nervous jokes, which I knew were meant to help make her more comfortable. It wasn't that she disapproved, it's that she just wasn't used to it...
> 
> She's also worried I'll steal her sons away the moment they turn 18.
> 
> ...



Know what? That's hot.

Especially since I was just about to post something about how lately I really want to corrupt some young under-21 boy. And I'm 31 too. Mmm....


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## AnnMarie (May 20, 2007)

Waxwing said:


> Know what? That's hot.
> 
> Especially since I was just about to post something about how lately I really want to corrupt some young under-21 boy. And I'm 31 too. Mmm....



Well, I'm older than you (37), and when I FIRST corrupted him, he was under 21. Feel free to live vicariously. LOL

(Although to be honest, he was partially corrupted already... which is fine by me.  )


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## Waxwing (May 20, 2007)

AnnMarie said:


> Well, I'm older than you (37), and when I FIRST corrupted him, he was under 21. Feel free to live vicariously. LOL
> 
> (Although to be honest, he was partially corrupted already... which is fine by me.  )



You are my heroine.


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## eightyseven (May 20, 2007)

BeaBea said:


> Evie, love is just love  It never happens when you want it to and sometimes happens when it probably shouldn't. It doesn't have to make sense to anyone but the two of you!
> 
> And as for men's Mothers... Lol, If it wasn't your age it might well be something else. Sometimes the apron strings are as strong as steel hawsers. I once had a boyfriends Mother try to stab me with a pair of scissors but thats a whole 'nother story...!
> 
> Tracey xx



So this thread not only makes me feel great about my age, but about my Mother as well!


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## AnnMarie (May 20, 2007)

Waxwing said:


> You are my heroine.



haha... please throw rose petals when I walk around.


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## SoVerySoft (May 20, 2007)

eightyseven said:


> So this thread not only makes me feel great about my age, but about my Mother as well!



No no, not a good thing to post in this thread!


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## TCUBOB (May 20, 2007)

Eeeeeeeeeeee.....raise you hand if you feel skeeeeeeeeeeeeeeevy about being compared to your mother in a thread about robbing the cradle. 
_
<hand up and waving about like a 1st grader with a bladder problem>_


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## CurvaceousBBWLover (May 20, 2007)

eightyseven said:


> So this thread not only makes me feel great about my age, but about my Mother as well!



Is there something we should know about you? 

I definitely don't think about Mom (or any other older female relative) when I'm thinking about sexy older women. 

Now if you meant that some young man might find your mom to be sexy, that would be understandable.


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## NancyGirl74 (May 20, 2007)

I've always preferred older men and resisted the younger guy thing. I can't really put into words why...However, there seems to be a lot more younger FAs open about their preferences than men my age. Perhaps it's time to explore a few new options...or should I say younger options?


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## ClashCityRocker (May 20, 2007)

throw me some cougars...i'd turn them into pussycats.

no joke. :-D


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## AnnMarie (May 20, 2007)

SoVerySoft said:


> No no, not a good thing to post in this thread!





TCUBOB said:


> Eeeeeeeeeeee.....raise you hand if you feel skeeeeeeeeeeeeeeevy about being compared to your mother in a thread about robbing the cradle.
> _
> <hand up and waving about like a 1st grader with a bladder problem>_



LOL... I'm fairly certain he was just saying he was feeling good about his mom because she'd never tried to stab anyone with a pair of scissors??? 

LOL


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## SoVerySoft (May 20, 2007)

AnnMarie said:


> LOL... I'm fairly certain he was just saying he was feeling good about his mom because she'd never tried to stab anyone with a pair of scissors???
> 
> LOL



ohhh....you're probably right. I didn't read the quote!

oopsie!


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## SoVerySoft (May 20, 2007)

Fish said:


> It's not something I think about much. And it's certainly not something I seek out, although seeing women older than me... signifigantly... is not new to me. I don't quite know WHY I become drawn to older women and I honestly don't try and disect it too much.
> 
> When I AM thinking about it, it's usually just because I'm taking my current relationship very seriously and I KNOW it's a source of major concern to her. It's a realistic obsticle for anything long term, but one I'm MORE than willing to scale.



I am starting to believe you.


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## Green Eyed Fairy (May 20, 2007)

NancyGirl74 said:


> I've always preferred older men and resisted the younger guy thing. I can't really put into words why...However, there seems to be a lot more younger FAs open about their preferences than men my age. Perhaps it's time to explore a few new options...or should I say younger options?




It's a good feeling to have a younger man "appreciate" you- keeps you young in many ways.


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## eightyseven (May 20, 2007)

CurvaceousBBWLover said:


> Is there something we should know about you?
> 
> I definitely don't think about Mom (or any other older female relative) when I'm thinking about sexy older women.
> 
> Now if you meant that some young man might find your mom to be sexy, that would be understandable.



Oh you guys... I probably should have given context for that comment. My bad. I meant that it's nice to know that my mother would never even think about chasing away someone I cared about with a bat or something. She's supportive, that's all.


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## BeaBea (May 21, 2007)

Slightly OT but

This reminds me of an incident in my past which I've tried to repress but I'll share it here for your amusement...

Picture the scene, a really nice man and I on our second date, snuggling up on a seat together enjoying the moonlight in a night filled with promise. Things are getting slightly heated with kisses and murmured sweet nothings when he moves a little closer, nuzzles my neck and says the imortal words...

'You smell just like my Mum'

It was rather like a bucket of cold water on the evening, and I've never worn that perfume since.

Tracey xx


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## liz (di-va) (May 21, 2007)

BeaBea said:


> Slightly OT but
> This reminds me of an incident in my past which I've tried to repress but I'll share it here for your amusement...
> Picture the scene, a really nice man and I on our second date, snuggling up on a seat together enjoying the moonlight in a night filled with promise. Things are getting slightly heated with kisses and murmured sweet nothings when he moves a little closer, nuzzles my neck and says the imortal words...
> 'You smell just like my Mum'
> ...



White Shoulders? No. 5? L'air de temps?


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## BeaBea (May 21, 2007)

liz (di-va) said:


> White Shoulders? No. 5? L'air de temps?



Lol - clever lady! It was No. 5
Tracey xx


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## liz (di-va) (May 21, 2007)

BeaBea said:


> Lol - clever lady! It was No. 5
> Tracey xx



One needs to...know these things 

Big Bad Robber


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## QuantumXL (May 21, 2007)

Well well well. What do we have here? Hehe sorry just got finished with reading the posts on this thread and i was like wow. 17? 20 year difference. hehe i did have my worries here and there about my relationship, but now im kinda reassuring. What i am worried about is the "dating" factor of this thread. It seems like a majority of the relationships with a age gap is more of a "Date" than a "Settled down" speak. Trust me and thats where i see a lot of this heading as well. We have A LOT in common (Some small patches of differences but we've worked around them some how), can't go a day without speaking to each other, and sometimes i can't sleep because i didn't talk to her before i went to sleep. Trust me age is not a big thing. 10 year difference isn't that bad (What have i been telling you Evie?) because you guys (in the 10 year range) are still in the same generation. Same music, Same opinions, and Same views. We both have our differences, but we're open to each other with opinions. We don't get into arguments about it (I hate arguments and i shut up, Guy reflex. Had a lot of friends that were girls, and some of them were violent, so its a reflex), and everything is smooth sailing so far. I can tell you right now when i met Evie it wasn't to reassuring about the relationship. I was 17 and she was 28 and she didn't want any FBI agents at her door step. (I totally understand) but she remembers my birthday because that was the most special day of her life, the day i turned 18. We talk EVERY SINGLE DAY on the phone and can't go a day without each other. This thread doesn't resolve our "Relationship" problem as she indicated earlier, but i rather keep that between us. But right as of now we are doing good. One happy couple so far, 10 year difference, and seeing a good future. I was talking to Evie about this last night, and I was like cool! i can't really see 20 years plus tho for some reason. Just seems like he can be your kid (For some reason i would draw the line at 20) but dating purposes okay. Long term relationships, seems like a problem there.


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## HugKiss (May 21, 2007)

ClashCityRocker said:


> throw me some cougars...i'd turn them into pussycats.
> 
> no joke. :-D



I'll bite! 

HugKiss :kiss2:


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## CurvaceousBBWLover (May 21, 2007)

ClashCityRocker said:


> throw me some cougars...i'd turn them into pussycats.
> 
> no joke. :-D



Throw me come cougars too! I love making them purr.


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## Green Eyed Fairy (May 21, 2007)

There are urban cougars on this board? :shocked: 

Oh my......


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## Blackjack (May 21, 2007)

I'll tackle some urban cougars as well. One type of hunting that I fully support.


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## Waxwing (May 21, 2007)

Even though we agreed to not mention moms again.... 

I mentioned to our goddess of younger men AnnMarie that my mom's recent ex (they were together for 6 years) was 16 years her senior. I'm hoping that the skill is genetic. 

Now someone bring me a young man, stat!!


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## Canadian (May 21, 2007)

I usually find myself involved with older girls. 

I don't think it's by conscious choice or anything, but when I think about it, the last several years, most girls I've dated have been 2-8 years older than me.

I don't think age is really an issue as long as you're in a similar stage in life, you know? I'm turning 23 in a month, but I've already finished my university degree, and I've got my career going. In that sense, I'm at the same stage as a lot of people are in their late 20's. With that in common, the "age factor" is diminished.

At least that's the way I rationalize it.


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## TCUBOB (May 21, 2007)

How many cc's of younger man do you need with that stat?  



Waxwing said:


> Even though we agreed to not mention moms again....
> 
> I mentioned to our goddess of younger men AnnMarie that my mom's recent ex (they were together for 6 years) was 16 years her senior. I'm hoping that the skill is genetic.
> 
> Now someone bring me a young man, stat!!


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