# Once again fat people do not get good sex



## Russell Williams (May 11, 2008)

This person obviously never looked at the Dimensions site. But then again since at the end she makes everything better with lap band instulations it is not in the fincial interests of her associates to look at the Dimensions site.

"It is very difficult to get some one to believe something when it is in their finnancial interest not to believe it"


Amy Nutt

Obesity, and especially morbid obesity, has a huge range of physical effects. Those that suffer from obesity have an increased chance of developing other serious diseases, have less energy, and suffer from depression and low self esteem. They also tend to have problems in the bedroom.

When a person is obese, their sex life suffers. A report presented at a meeting of The North American Association for the Study of Obesity by Martin Binks, PhD, from Duke University Medical Center, shows that morbidly obese Americans are 25 times more likely than those of normal weight to report problems with their sex lives. It's a dramatic difference.

Why does this problem so widely affect the obese? There are a variety of reasons, both physical and emotional. The larger a person gets, the more problems he or she will report in the bedroom-- the desire for sex, sexual performance, and even sexual enjoyment fall dramatically. The physical restrictions placed on the obese by excess weight often make sexual activity too difficult or strenuous. In addition, a constant lack of energy and feeling of lethargy will tend to reduce the desire for sex.

Another impact obesity has on sexuality is a psychological one. Obesity brings along with it lowered self-esteem and often feelings of shame. These feelings lead to an unwillingness to display the body or make oneself vulnerable to their partner. The physical effects of obesity can also lead to performance anxiety, making partners unwilling to attempt to perform sexually. In a study of 928 obese men and women, of those seeking treatment for their obesity 50% had a decreased sex drive and trouble wanting sex, 42% felt they had problems performing sexually, and 41% said they avoided sex altogether.

Obesity also affects sexuality through its impact on marriages and relationships in and of themselves. Shame is a common consequence of obesity, and it often tends to cause an emotional imbalance within relationship. This happens where one partner feels "more worthless" than the other partner. Also, the partners of overweight persons can, at times, have problems finding their partner sexually attractive. This is especially common when the bulk of the weight gain occurred during the course of the relationship. When this happens in a relationship, it is hurtful and difficult to face for both partners, and communication about these issues is usually avoided. But in the end, avoidance of this topic only creates further problems in a relationship, as it cuts off lines of communication.

A large number of factors play into the sexual problems experienced by obese individuals. When physical problems are as severely compounded by psychological issues, as occurs with obesity, sexual dysfunction can seem an insurmountable obstacle. It's important, though, to seek help if you're experiencing problems with sexual performance or sex drive due to obesity. Simply taking the first steps to seek for obesity treatment has a positive emotional impact, allowing obese persons to feel some level of control over their situation. Sexual satisfaction is a basic human need, and it's just one more key reason to care for your health and try to find healthful solutions to the problem of obesity.

The Lap Band procedure helps diminish serious health risks brought on by over weight. The Lap band will help to improve your self-esteem by providing a healthy obesity treatment.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Amy_Nutt


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## AtlantisAK (May 11, 2008)

Russell Williams said:


> Another impact obesity has on sexuality is a psychological one. Obesity brings along with it lowered self-esteem and often feelings of shame. These feelings lead to an unwillingness to display the body or make oneself vulnerable to their partner. The physical effects of obesity can also lead to performance anxiety, making partners unwilling to attempt to perform sexually. In a study of 928 obese men and women, of those seeking treatment for their obesity 50% had a decreased sex drive and trouble wanting sex, 42% felt they had problems performing sexually, and 41% said they avoided sex altogether.



This really just burns me. You're right, obviously this person -didn't- read Dimensions or (psst, don't tell them this! ->) do much in-depth research.
Or perhaps all of us on dimensions are the other 50% getting their woo-hoo on?
I personally have no problems in bed, mentally or physically...I'll romp as much as a skinny girl(although I am not a sexual nut who needs it 2 or three times a day. Is that what they call normal?). And the self-esteem issue the author mentions? Yeah, I was embarassed with my partner and wouldn't be naked even if he paid me...but c'mon, it was my first (and only) relationship! I'm sure even skinny people feel akward in the bedroom or naked the first or fiftieth, they're always nitpicking about their bodies. Perhaps more than we do/ever would.
This is another article that just irks me to no end...I just get the feeling that the purpose of the article was to make obese people feel bad about themselves and have the lap band procedure. (I'll admit, I looked into it once but said hell no after seeing all the cons. I'd rather be fat, firm, bouncy and have my DD boobies! I'm happy with my health and who I am!) It's just another round-about ad to get everyone all skinny and uniform. Personally...I think uniformity is boring and predictable. No fun at all with everything the same.


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## largenlovely (May 11, 2008)

This person needs to talk to my boyfriend......lol

in fact, i think it's quite the opposite, i think fat women are hornier lol



Russell Williams said:


> In addition, a constant lack of energy and feeling of lethargy will tend to reduce the desire for sex.


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## furious styles (May 11, 2008)

largenlovely said:


> in fact, i think it's quite the opposite, i think fat women are hornier lol



my personal research in the subject collates with your findings as well


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## toni (May 11, 2008)

Russell Williams said:


> . In addition, a constant lack of energy and feeling of lethargy will tend to reduce the desire for sex.



So not true. Two things get me going in life. SEX and FOOD! :happy:


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## missy_blue_eyez (May 11, 2008)

Kudos on the sex and food  hehe each in ample proportions please


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## pani (May 11, 2008)

It is a ridiculous article, but it is also marketing. It is a commercial for lap bands. Unfortunately, the trend in advertising is to use "experts" for their pitch. What we need to do is make people aware and not to trust what they read just because someone with credentials says so!


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## butch (May 11, 2008)

You know what? Don't dismiss this out of hand, since even the most sexually active fattie on this board knows we live in a society that tells us fat is ugly, gross, and not sexy.

Good for ya'll for getting all the sex you want, but don't presume that is the same for every other fattie in the world, even the ones who spend time here at Dimensions. Funny how much we've talked in other threads recently about how this place is a place for fat women to recover from all the fat hatred out in the world, and yet we turn around and proclaim that all fatties are getting all the sex they want, knowing full well that is not the case. Don't you think that is a bit insensitive, ignoring the fact that many good people who are Dims members are not in a long term relationship because either they aren't finding willing sex partners, or they're only finding willing sex partners who don't actually want a LTR of any kind with a fat person.

When sexy images of fat people start showing up in Playboy or Playgirl, then maybe I'll accept a complete criticism of the findings of this study. Until then, I'm going to say that yes, I agree with their findings about fat and sex.


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## Sweet_Serenade (May 11, 2008)

Wow, oh the smoke and mirrors of marketing, it's practically mind boggling.
No, I would not say there is a direct correlation between obesity and depression, obese people are only more likely to be depressed because society makes it that way.
They market a standard, and condemn everything else, seeing people say 'this is beauty' over and over, never recognizing the subjectivity of the matter, makes people buy it.
This ad is no different, saying such wonderful things like obesity brings low self-esteem and depression, not even 'can bring' because that's not good marketing.
It's handing out free guilt in order to keep a certain market of the plastic surgery biz thriving, which is a terrible thing to do, screw with peoples' psychology to make customers; but it's frighteningly common in countless businesses.

I don't know about this facepalm inducing piece of fiction but I personally had much lower self-eseem when I was skinny and I was more shy about showing skin. I've only had the exact opposite to the symptoms described here since I began gaining weight. Now, naturally people vary and this wont be the case with everyone; I only mention it because of the generalization of the article. It seemed to presume all obese people experienced the same things; no matter what.

@Butch, yeah, it is a bit immature to dismiss this; having done no first hand research myself. However, it's my own little theory that the supposed depression and lack of sexual confidence is a man made side effect of obesity and not caused by obesity itself. Merely the stigma being obese has attached to it in this society. Being told you're ugly by billboards and magazines all of the time is bound to have some psychological effect, and buying into that message of 'you're ugly' will subsequently damage your sex drive.


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## toni (May 11, 2008)

butch said:


> Good for ya'll for getting all the sex you want, but don't presume that is the same for every other fattie in the world, even the ones who spend time here at Dimensions. Funny how much we've talked in other threads recently about how this place is a place for fat women to recover from all the fat hatred out in the world, and yet we turn around and proclaim that all fatties are getting all the sex they want, knowing full well that is not the case. Don't you think that is a bit insensitive, ignoring the fact that many good people who are Dims members are not in a long term relationship because either they aren't finding willing sex partners, or they're only finding willing sex partners who don't actually want a LTR of any kind with a fat person.
> 
> When sexy images of fat people start showing up in Playboy or Playgirl, then maybe I'll accept a complete criticism of the findings of this study. Until then, I'm going to say that yes, I agree with their findings about fat and sex.



I am completely stunned by this post. GOOD IDEA! Reaffirm to every lonely fattie, the reason why they are alone is because they are fat. Sorry, I don't believe that. There are a lot of fat woman walking around in LTRs. There are a lot of skinny women who can't keep a man.

I felt that way at one point in my life. It took me a long time to realize it wasn't my fat that was causing the problem. There were a lot of emotional things I needed to fix about myself before I was ready for a LTR. 

BTW, go pull a skinny chick off the street. See if she looks like a chick from Playboy. NO, she wont. EVERYTHING on those woman in the magazines are fake. RIght down to their pussy lips. Playboy is an unrealistic standard for women.


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## CAMellie (May 11, 2008)

Sweet_Serenade said:


> @Butch, yeah, it is a bit immature to dismiss this; having done no first hand research myself. However, it's my own little theory that the supposed depression and lack of sexual confidence is a man made side effect of obesity and not caused by obesity itself. Merely the stigma being obese has attached to it in this society. Being told you're ugly by billboards and magazines all of the time is bound to have some psychological effect, and buying into that message of 'you're ugly' will subsequently damage your sex drive.



Agreed...thrice over. :bow:


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## BBW MeganLynn44DD (May 11, 2008)

I was thin when I was younger and not as sexually active.As I gained it seems a switch was turned on.I'm am always looking for some!


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## Fascinita (May 11, 2008)

toni said:


> I am completely stunned by this post. GOOD IDEA! Reaffirm to every lonely fattie, the reason why they are alone is because they are fat. Sorry, I don't believe that. There are a lot of fat woman walking around in LTRs. There are a lot of skinny women who can't keep a man.



If I may, toni. I took butch to be saying that there are many fat people who, because fat is treated as less attractive, cannot find sexual partners, and that their experiences should not be swept under the rug or invalidated. I didn't read butch as saying that fat people _can't_ get a LTR or are somehow less sexual by nature than thin people, just calling for an acknowledgement that--in real terms--for many of us, this continues to be a painful, long and lonely row to hoe--again, not because fat people are doomed to never have sex... but simply because, as a side effect of fat discrimination (as Serenade suggests, above), it is often difficult for many of us to find partners and maintain a healthy, active sexual and romantic life.

butch, is this about right? or did I misread your words?


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## saucywench (May 11, 2008)

Sweet_Serenade said:


> Wow, oh the smoke and mirrors of marketing, it's practically mind boggling.


For me, it literally _is _mind-boggling. Also mind-boggling is how many otherwise intelligent human beings (I won't go into the remainder whose powers of comprehension are lacking) buy into it. Is it just about marketing and advertising, though? How are people seemingly born with prejudice and bigotry? Do they learn it all from advertising? Although I believe that advertising does advance and perpetuate ignorant assumptions and biases, the wholesale derision of fat people (since fat people are the subject at hand, here) has existed long before the advent of advertising. To what can we point as to its origins? Is it merely a promulgation of stereotyping, passed down through generations and among peers, much like racism?


Sweet_Serenade said:


> ...I would not say there is a direct correlation between obesity and depression, obese people are only more likely to be depressed because society makes it that way.


I absolutely agree. I am firmly convinced that I (as someone who has been fat all her life) would have managed reasonably well (and quite soundly of mind and esteem) making my way in the world inhabiting a fat body were it not for the unrelenting messages I received that _something was wrong with me_ because of it.


Sweet_Serenade said:


> ....it's my own little theory that the supposed depression and lack of sexual confidence is a man made side effect of obesity and not caused by obesity itself. Merely the stigma being obese has attached to it in this society.


It is my own theory, as well--and I have no need to conduct any first-hand research as to the veracity of my theory when I have 51 years of first-hand empirical knowledge to back it up.



Sweet_Serenade said:


> Being told you're ugly by billboards and magazines all of the time is bound to have some psychological effect, and buying into that message of 'you're ugly' will subsequently damage your sex drive.


I agree, although it wasn't my sex drive so much that was affected. I could almost argue the contrary, as I have always had a strong libido (to this day), but I _could_ make the claim that that was in part due to becoming sexualized at a very early age. I suppose I will never know whether my libido naturally would have developed as strongly, as I can't go back and change my personal history. What _was _affected was my self-esteem and, consequently, the onset of depression--to the extent that I had WLS at the age of 27 when I weighed a mere _228 pounds. _I didn't undergo such a violation to my body because of health reasons; I was perfectly (ok, _relatively_) fine. I did it because I felt there was no escape (short of suicide, which I considered) from those neverending messages I received (whether overtly or covertly). And those medical professionals, be being oh, so willing to perform the surgery, further substantiated this conclusion I had reached. 

It isn't that I expected _never_ to be criticized, teased, bullied, or harassed for anything, _ever_--everyone undergoes some of that to some degree, and in that sense it is relatively expected (I wouldn't use the term _normal,_ but _common_, certainly)--it's that such discrimination by others, _simply for being fat,_ is so unilaterally arbitrary, just like people being discriminated against simply on the basis of their skin color. The size of our bodies or the color of our skin speaks to _nothing_ about who we are as human beings. If you want to judge or criticize me about something, come up with a valid reason--something quantifiable rather than qualifiable. Otherwise, don't unload your pathology on me, and I will respond in kind. Stop looking at fat people as the problem; take a look in the mirror and therein you might find it.

Thanks for posting, SS.


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## largenlovely (May 11, 2008)

I think maybe Butch was talking about long term relationships...

My initial disagreement with the article was on sex drive...i know my sex drive has always been through the roof...so to hear the article say it wasn't, well that was ridiculous to me.

In response to what Butch said, I would have to somewhat agree. Although, ANY woman can go out and have sex at ANY point...fat, skinny, whatever. A woman could walk into a bar and throw herself at the men there and WILL go home with a man and have sex, if that's what she wants to do. I saw TFG post that she could go to the bar and there would always be drunk men who would want to take her home...so...a fat woman *can* have sex if she wants and at any time she wants. So, in that sense...the article IS pretty ridiculous. 

The thing is..and this is where i think Butch was correct, we fat women have standards too. God knows i wouldn't go home with some man from a bar who decided to have sex with the fatty because he was shitfaced. I think Butch made this about long term monogomous sex within a relationship, which is what most people are searching for. In that sense, i would have to agree. fat women do have a harder time finding this...no argument there.


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## butch (May 14, 2008)

Fascinita said:


> If I may, toni. I took butch to be saying that there are many fat people who, because fat is treated as less attractive, cannot find sexual partners, and that their experiences should not be swept under the rug or invalidated. I didn't read butch as saying that fat people _can't_ get a LTR or are somehow less sexual by nature than thin people, just calling for an acknowledgement that--in real terms--for many of us, this continues to be a painful, long and lonely row to hoe--again, not because fat people are doomed to never have sex... but simply because, as a side effect of fat discrimination (as Serenade suggests, above), it is often difficult for many of us to find partners and maintain a healthy, active sexual and romantic life.
> 
> butch, is this about right? or did I misread your words?



Yes, that is what I said, Fascinita. If this weren't true, I'd be willing to bet a lot less fat people would be at Dims, or at the very least there's be a lot less discussion about 'how to date a SSBBW' or "how do FAs and BBWs find common ground' or some of the many threads that document how difficult it can be for fat people to have rich and satisfying romantic and sexual lives because of the rampant fat phobia in our culture.

If we pretend this isn't the reality, we're being just as hurtful to our fellow fatties as the people who buy into the idea that the only way a fattie can have love and sex is to have WLS and/or become thin. Each polarizing viewpoint erases the real lives of many fat people, both those who are getting all the sex and love they want, and those who aren't. I'd like to see the whole edifice that supports the hateful idea that 'fat is unsexy' torn down, and the only way to do that is to make sure all my fatties are getting a little somthin somthin, OK?


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## stevenbbwlvr (May 14, 2008)

butch said:


> You know what? Don't dismiss this out of hand, since even the most sexually active fattie on this board knows we live in a society that tells us fat is ugly, gross, and not sexy.



However, my tingling private parts tell me the opposite. I believe them.


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## TraciJo67 (May 14, 2008)

Butch, I agree with everything that you've said.

Just wanted to add, my own indignation comes with the underlying assumptions scattered throughout that article -- lose weight, have better sex, better self-esteem, more energy, blah!

Wasn't true for me. None of it. Yeah, I got down to a "socially acceptable" size 6. I had to pour my skin into those jeans, but hey ... size 6!  Did nothing for my self esteem. What did was a tiny bit of perspective via maturity. Love me, love my skin and scars and cellulite. Or don't. Either way, I'm fine. And that perspective isn't going to change no matter what my weight. 

As for energy ... the fatigue that I battled as a result of iron & B-12 deficient anemia was far more draining & had a much greater impact on my sex life than carrying an extra 150 pounds ever did. That has since improved, but it took years.


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## crosseyedhamster (May 14, 2008)

I'm a new guy to the boards and this is my first post, so I'm kinda nervous.

All that I'm going to say is that some of the horniest girls I know are big girls.


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## stevenbbwlvr (May 15, 2008)

crosseyedhamster said:


> I'm a new guy to the boards and this is my first post, so I'm kinda nervous.
> 
> All that I'm going to say is that some of the horniest girls I know are big girls.




Yes indeedy.

I, once upon a time, had a relationship with a woman who was practically round, she was so big.

Perhaps 'relationship' is the wrong word, because all she was interested in was sex.

She once referred to "the way I look"...apparently, she once felt that self-consciousness and shame that so many big women feel. But then, she utterly rejected it; she was proud and shameless and totally out there as a BBW. And, (without becoming too explicit, which, mores the pity, is not permitted here) she was _incredible_. She nearly dislocated my spine. I still think about her, often as not, it inspires a need for, ahem, a bout of solitary pleasure.:eat2:

It ended because I found the 'sex only' business to be a bit feelingless and reptilian. Also, she wanted me to have a threesome with another male, and I don't make whoopee with other boys.


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## stevenbbwlvr (May 15, 2008)

Her books are something else.

For the uninitiated, she's a writer who some years ago, began soliciting people to send her descriptions of their sexual fantasies. The result is something way more erotic than any porn could ever be; it is _real._

The titles include "My Secret Garden", "Forbidden Flowers" and "Women On Top." There are numerous contributions from BBW's.

(One of my favorites is this young gal who dresses in revealing clothes, and relishes seeing the men's pants tent out. The erect penis doesn't lie)

The only downside is that it makes me kick myself; all those years in middle school, bypassing the hottest of the hot girls, because I cared about what my stupid friends/the HS pecking order thought.


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## Raqui (May 15, 2008)

I cant do nothing but laugh because that is so far from the truth It seems like insanity. LOL

They must be talking about those with mental issues with fat because I have never had a problem


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## Raqui (May 15, 2008)

largenlovely said:


> This person needs to talk to my boyfriend......lol
> 
> in fact, i think it's quite the opposite, i think fat women are hornier lol




This is true if you read Lara Fraters book Fat Chicks Rule it is prove scientifically that more fat makes you desire sex more. As Lara put it the very thing we are not suppose to have is what makes our sex lives better.


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## Gingembre (May 15, 2008)

I am fat....I likes me lots of sex. Good sex at least....preferably excellent sex. Unfortunately I am not getting any, nor have I been for a while. *sigh*






Sorry....random post....very tired!


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## missy_blue_eyez (May 15, 2008)

Gingembre said:


> I am fat....I likes me lots of sex. Good sex at least....preferably excellent sex. Unfortunately I am not getting any, nor have I been for a while. *sigh*
> 
> 
> 
> ...


lol girl! I feel we are living he same life atm! lol I am also no-sex Naomi at the min! I love it, jus aint getting it...where are all the FA's from my part of the world!! Thats right all you FA's get ur asses to the Uk, preferably the Midlands! Thank you!


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## mergirl (May 16, 2008)

toni said:


> I am completely stunned by this post. GOOD IDEA! Reaffirm to every lonely fattie, the reason why they are alone is because they are fat. Sorry, I don't believe that. There are a lot of fat woman walking around in LTRs. There are a lot of skinny women who can't keep a man.
> 
> I felt that way at one point in my life. It took me a long time to realize it wasn't my fat that was causing the problem. There were a lot of emotional things I needed to fix about myself before I was ready for a LTR.
> 
> BTW, go pull a skinny chick off the street. See if she looks like a chick from Playboy. NO, she wont. EVERYTHING on those woman in the magazines are fake. RIght down to their pussy lips. Playboy is an unrealistic standard for women.


hmmm.. I hate to lower the tone of this important and interesting thread (ok i love to lower it!)..
but wouldnt it be great if there was the fat playboy mansion!!??
we just need some 700 year old dirty old man in a smoking jacket.. and we can call him "huge heffner"!! lmao..
infact forget about him.. we can just have lots of sexy bbw bunnies!!
oh i love being a woman cause now this post doesnt seem awfully sexist! muwahahaha..
just a wee thought for you there to think about on those lonely nights with just your Pj's for comfort!
and to contribute to the initial thread, in my experience (which is too slutty to tell you without having to go to confession and say hail marys..or whatever the athiest equivelent is) no WAY is this crazy "research" true!!??
having studied reaserch methods i know that there are far too many variables to know if "fat people have less sex" than thin people, unless the study was much bigger and took a lot more things into account!
This may be another fallicy (but one i like to believe) You would think that if people were passionate about food then they would also be passionate in other departments!!
Obviously everyone is different and sex drive is just one of those differences..
There are SO many holes in this womans "study" i could ramble on all day and pick it appart but i am off to think about bunnies and wearing a smoking jacket!!!

xmer


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## mergirl (May 16, 2008)

missy_blue_eyez said:


> lol girl! I feel we are living he same life atm! lol I am also no-sex Naomi at the min! I love it, jus aint getting it...where are all the FA's from my part of the world!! Thats right all you FA's get ur asses to the Uk, preferably the Midlands! Thank you!


I know! its crazy! I only have one openly "fa" friend" who is a gay guy.. and generally gay guys (as a group) are more open about what they like sexually..
Though..i do have bbw friends who's partners are SO attracted to them.. but have never heard of the term "fa".
i think unless you have actually been on a site like this or watched a documentary on the subject you might never come across the term "fa" or even "bbw"..
so i recon the there will be a lot of guys who are fa's but just dont know thats what they are called! 
lmao.. am i rambling..?
i am a totally "out" UKFA but, as i am a woman this would mean that a huge lifestyle change would have to be made for a lot of you!! lmao
right.. i am off on a mission to find all the UKFA's and i shall send them all here! lol
actually my friend miesh thinks its hilarious because she thinks i turn people into Fa's cause a lot of my friends are now dating big women...
its like the fat crusades!
if people dont date fat chicks i beat em!!
lmao xxmer


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## mediaboy (May 16, 2008)

If the sex I have with fat people is some how well bellow the average level of awesome that not fat people have then I don't think I could handle that sort of pleasure.

I mean at some point, I imagine you cum so hard you go into a coma.


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## mergirl (May 16, 2008)

mediaboy said:


> If the sex I have with fat people is some how well bellow the average level of awesome that not fat people have then I don't think I could handle that sort of pleasure.
> 
> I mean at some point, I imagine you cum so hard you go into a coma.


well, its worth a shot..
cum coma.. interesting..

xxmer


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## missy_blue_eyez (May 16, 2008)

mediaboy said:


> If the sex I have with fat people is some how well bellow the average level of awesome that not fat people have then I don't think I could handle that sort of pleasure.
> 
> I mean at some point, I imagine you cum so hard you go into a coma.


Ok Ok!!!! This was meant to be a serious thread and we have all TOTALLY lowered the tone!!!! Behave people....but yeh cum coma....thats something somebody should research!!!! lol


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## mergirl (May 16, 2008)

well i conducted a study. here are my findings:
i have never had a cum coma therfor they cannot exist!
well my research has about the same validity as this crazy woman who calls herself a researcher! lmao

Another point (which highers the tone slightly).. she (and i quote, hence the quotation marks) that..

"In a study of 928 obese men and women, of those seeking treatment for their obesity 50% had a decreased sex drive and trouble wanting sex, 42% felt they had problems performing sexually, and 41% said they avoided sex altogether."

"of those seeking treatment for thier obesity" is the operative sentance here and it completely nullifies her whole theory! If you are activly seeking treatment for your obesity then obviously you are not happy with your body/weight and then i guess that you might also have a decreased sex drive because of this..
i think her findings would work out a whole lot differently were she to base her research on women who visit "dimensions forums" regularaly!!
Cant we even be a control group?
Anyway.. all i wanted to say was that:
she is baws and her research is baws..
infact, it is big hairy dogs baws!
please tell me someone stupid didnt actually publish her findings!!

xxmer


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## CAMellie (May 18, 2008)

mediaboy said:


> If the sex I have with fat people is some how well bellow the average level of awesome that not fat people have then I don't think I could handle that sort of pleasure.
> 
> I mean at some point, I imagine you cum so hard you go into a coma.



Does blacking out count? Or does it have to be a full-fledged on life support coma? :blink:


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## mergirl (May 19, 2008)

CAMellie said:


> Does blacking out count? Or does it have to be a full-fledged on life support coma? :blink:


erm i think you have to be on life support for it to count as a real cum coma.. i think before we conduct our research we have to get our facts right! lol

xmer


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## CAMellie (May 19, 2008)

mergirl said:


> erm i think you have to be on life support for it to count as a real cum coma.. i think before we conduct our research we have to get our facts right! lol
> 
> xmer



Well shit! That leaves ME out. Let me know if we're planning any experiments....I volunteer!


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## swamptoad (May 19, 2008)

largenlovely said:


> This person needs to talk to my boyfriend......lol
> 
> in fact, i think it's quite the opposite, i think fat women are hornier lol



Heck ya! :happy:


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## OneHauteMama (May 21, 2008)

Hmmm...well, in my own experience, THIS fat girl doesn't get good sex. Not from lack of trying, but from lack of a willing partner. I get turned down more often than not. Funny thing is he married me this way. He knew what he was getting. But I guess because the vows didn't say "Love, Honor, and FUCK", he figures he's living up to his end of the deal. And when he does decide to grace me with his penis, it's never been very good anyway. *shrug*


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## Tina (May 24, 2008)

I've always found that the truth, and frankly a healthy balance, is somewhere between the two extremes. It's as ridiculous to say that fat people aren't getting any sex as it is to say we're all getting sex all of the time.

BTW, mer, but I don't see where it would be an improvement for there to be an fat Hef mansion. That guy is a pathetic, insecure fossil (not to be too pointed about it... ).


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## revolutionman (May 24, 2008)

I'm not getting as much sex as I'd like, but when I do ocassionally seal the deal i tend to shock and awe. Matress puddles speak louder than medical studies.


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## Hawksmoor (May 24, 2008)

largenlovely said:


> My initial disagreement with the article was on sex drive...i know my sex drive has always been through the roof...so to hear the article say it wasn't, well that was ridiculous to me.



I have a difficult time understanding how this kind of thinking in any way constitutes a substantive rebuttal to the study findings. Just because your own personal experience is contrary to the findings of the study doesn't in any way invalidate said findings. Also, none of us know how the study was conducted or how much research went into it. Sure, it could be a crappy study, but given that it was done at Duke University School of Medicine I somehow doubt it.

This reminds me of sitting in class at college and watching other students tell the professor he or she was wrong because they had some anecdote about their mother or cousin or whatnot that contradicted what was being taught. In many ways our own experiences in life are unique to us and cannot be used as any type of factual basis to refute much of anything. There's no way to know if all of us here at Dimensions are typical or atypical of the obese population. So, as butch said, it's a mistake to dismiss the study simply because you find it offensive or feel it doesn't apply to you.


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## Tina (May 24, 2008)

One doesn't have to do research in order to have an opinion, you know.


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## KuroBara (May 25, 2008)

Raqui said:


> I cant do nothing but laugh because that is so far from the truth It seems like insanity. LOL
> 
> They must be talking about those with mental issues with fat because I have never had a problem


 

I have mental problems and it's still not true!!


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## stefanie (May 25, 2008)

Does anyone know where the subjects came from for that study? Duke University has a big, well-known weight loss clinic. * If* they drew people from that weight loss clinic population, then it makes sense they would report problems with sex. Someone that bound on losing weight (to go to a university clinic to do it) probably has all sorts of body image problems, for one. Self-body hatred is probably one of the biggest *killers* of sexual desire or happiness. 

Also, were people in the study drawn from the patient population at Duke University Hospital? People who are hospitalized already have some illness - and that will affect sex as well.

So without knowing more about the study, it's hard for me at least to accept it out of hand.


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## Hawksmoor (May 25, 2008)

Tina said:


> One doesn't have to do research in order to have an opinion, you know.



Yes, I know. However, one's opinion will be baseless if it is predicated on faulty logic. An example of this would be declaring the findings of a study done at a renowned and prestigious university to be ridiculous because they are contrary to your own, individual life experiences. If you use your own experiences in life as a basis for some greater, broader reaching truth that applies to other people that share one or more characteristics with you (in this case being fat) you're making a false leap.


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## stevenbbwlvr (May 28, 2008)

OneHauteMama said:


> Hmmm...well, in my own experience, THIS fat girl doesn't get good sex. Not from lack of trying, but from lack of a willing partner. I get turned down more often than not. Funny thing is he married me this way. He knew what he was getting. But I guess because the vows didn't say "Love, Honor, and FUCK", he figures he's living up to his end of the deal. And when he does decide to grace me with his penis, it's never been very good anyway. *shrug*



Awww.

I was jacking off, last night, thinking of your hungry Soft Place.

Don't give up hope, you've plenty of admirers out here.:eat2:


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## TraciJo67 (May 29, 2008)

stevenbbwlvr said:


> Awww.
> 
> I was jacking off, last night, thinking of your hungry Soft Place.
> 
> Don't give up hope, you've plenty of admirers out here.:eat2:



Wow. Such flowery, poetic words. What woman wouldn't melt?


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## mergirl (May 29, 2008)

TraciJo67 said:


> Wow. Such flowery, poetic words. What woman wouldn't melt?


ROFLMAO!!!
indeed!


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## Suze (May 29, 2008)

largenlovely said:


> This person needs to talk to my boyfriend......lol
> 
> in fact, i think it's quite the opposite, i think fat women are hornier lol



Fat women produce more estrogen then regular women. The more fat cells you have, the more estrogen you produce. We're naturally hornier... it's a physical fact. 

Or so I've heard.


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## TearInYourHand (May 29, 2008)

stefanie said:


> Does anyone know where the subjects came from for that study? Duke University has a big, well-known weight loss clinic. * If* they drew people from that weight loss clinic population, then it makes sense they would report problems with sex. Someone that bound on losing weight (to go to a university clinic to do it) probably has all sorts of body image problems, for one. Self-body hatred is probably one of the biggest *killers* of sexual desire or happiness.
> 
> Also, were people in the study drawn from the patient population at Duke University Hospital? People who are hospitalized already have some illness - and that will affect sex as well.
> 
> So without knowing more about the study, it's hard for me at least to accept it out of hand.



Good point. Good freakin' point. Quoted for truth.


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## MoonGoddess (May 30, 2008)

_I may regret this later...but screw skinny sex! While I am not getting what I want now (hubby lives three states away AND has ED), I AM horny as hell. When I DO get some I curl his toes.

But for now, my best friend plugs into the wall and has a very sturdy transmission. You could chip concrete with it, and it is hilarious to watch it chase the cats across the floor.

Now I have officially over-shared. Gotta love this thread though._


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## Tina (May 30, 2008)

Hey Moon Goddess, welcome back! 

That's hilarious about your cats and vibe... makes for a strange visual while reading. 

Another one having lousy sex here. The best lousy sex I've ever had.


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## MoonGoddess (May 30, 2008)

Tina said:


> Hey Moon Goddess, welcome back!
> 
> That's hilarious about your cats and vibe... makes for a strange visual while reading.
> 
> Another one having lousy sex here. The best lousy sex I've ever had.


_
Thanks sweetness! I fully understand the strange visual...you have to see it to really fathom it. And I hope you get something VERY good VERY soon...

And I will let you in on another dirty little secret...I am heavy-duty lusting over certain gentlemen here. They make for good mental cannon fodder when I break out my artillery and take matters into my own hands.

Hmmm...I must be in heat again._


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## Tina (May 30, 2008)

Heh. Hey, why not? I'm sure there's a lot of that stuff going on which ever side of the fence one is on. 

I'm hoping for something very good tonight, as a matter of fact... Ever have one of those nights that just fizzles out because it turns into a comedy of errors? That was last night. Funny as hell.


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## MoonGoddess (May 31, 2008)

Tina said:


> Heh. Hey, why not? I'm sure there's a lot of that stuff going on which ever side of the fence one is on.
> 
> I'm hoping for something very good tonight, as a matter of fact... Ever have one of those nights that just fizzles out because it turns into a comedy of errors? That was last night. Funny as hell.




_Here's hoping last night was a very good one!_


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## Tracy (Jun 3, 2008)

In a study of 928 obese men and women, of those seeking treatment for their obesity *50% had a decreased sex drive and trouble wanting sex,* 42% felt they had problems performing sexually, and 41% said they avoided sex altogether.

For some reason I'm not believing this!


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## DirtyLittleDiva (Jun 13, 2008)

Hahaha.... at the rate me and my dude have sex, i'm sure we run circles around many slender people  They are testing the wrong kinda subjects, lol.


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## mergirl (Jun 13, 2008)

Tracy said:


> In a study of 928 obese men and women, of those seeking treatment for their obesity *50% had a decreased sex drive and trouble wanting sex,* 42% felt they had problems performing sexually, and 41% said they avoided sex altogether.
> 
> For some reason I'm not believing this!


this is the point.. its NOT a valid study.. because there wasnt a wide enough spectrum of fat people used! They have only used "people seeking treatment for obesity". This means that they are already unhappy about thier size. I think you would find that the findings would be MUCH different were they to have a study using 1000 people from dimensions..!!

xmer


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## stevenbbwlvr (Jul 10, 2008)

TraciJo67 said:


> Wow. Such flowery, poetic words. What woman wouldn't melt?



Some do.

There's a letter in Nancy Friday's book "Women On Top" from a lady whose erotic fantasies center around watching men masturbating.

There's another one from a BBW gal who relishes dressing in revealing clothing, and watching the guy's pants tenting out...

The erect cock doesn't lie; no matter what disparaging things BBW's might hear/read/ etc. ....that virile men are not powerfully attracted is undeniable.


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## nlittle1011 (Jul 10, 2008)

LMAO this lady has obviously never been peeping into my bedroom. I can't get enough sex, ever LOL (could be cause it's peak time though LOL but my fat isn't stopping it for sure!)


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