# Dedicated vs Cooperative BHM



## Ichida (Sep 16, 2008)

This topic came up with me very recently. I'm wondering what everyone else's thoughts on it are.

History: Me and my boyfriend of 3 years broke up over many issues (communication, ffa thing). I am back with him after a two month break and lengthly dicussions of what happened and what we can do to prevent it in future. He was never a dedicated bhm - he never WANTED to be fatter or overeat for the sake of being overful or gaining. He did however like enjoying the ability to overeat a bit and knew I liked it, but it ended up getting to him because of teasing of the outside world.

After we broke up he admitted to some fellow electricians that we broke up over the weight thing, and how weird things like pleasuring him while he eats really turns me on :blush:. (They had made fun of how chubby he was getting when he started). 

They apparently ripped a strip off him (REGULAR GUYS!!) saying, "WTF is wrong with you man? You broke up with her over stuff like that? That's what every guy wants - to be able to eat what they want and get fat, and she not only doesn't care she LIKES it and gets OFF on it? So what if you're getting chubby???"

He had the revelation that it wasn't a big of a deal as he thought, and most guys just smirk enviously n pat his tummy. He also realized that at 215 lbs he isn't chubby (went out with a 300 lb guy for a tiny bit, so he realizes I know I want em bigger, he isn't a test). And he REALLY realized that this is hardwired into me. He is slowly learning how to use it to his "advantage" ^.~

It was really hard to come to terms with the fact that he would never be a deicated bhm. But we realized that it was really a small part of our relationship because we have so much in common and love each other. He is cooperative with it - He IS turned on when i touch his belly now, and he doesn't mind putting on the pounds slowly. He said its inevitable he gets fatter with time - no one gets thinner as they age.

Most of the stories I hear of/read have one side gaining purposefully, with delight - but I'm sure there are tons of relationships where the gaining partner isn't hardwired that way, but they love pleasing their partner by gaining slowly, reassured by their love.

Any thoughts?


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## Cane (Sep 16, 2008)

Dedicated and cooperative seems like a pretty good distinction for BHMs dealing with FFAs. I guess the third (unmentioned) category would be uncooperative; denying touching, refusal to eat, commitments to lose weight, etc. As long as the BHM is at least in some sense cooperative, it's definitely possible to make a relationship work; it's only when they become uncooperative that it's really a deal breaker.

Me personally, it took some time to realize it but I suppose you could put me into the dedicated category. Even after dating an FFA for a bit, I find that I'm quite fixated on the idea of my own fat. Having it "appreciated" sort of erotically charged the way I perceive it on my own 290 pound body. As a "dedicated" BHM, the only problem is I don't feel I could really have a satisfying relationship with a non-FFA, no matter how much she 'accepted' my fat. Too often I'd treat my big belly the way a stripper treats her breasts, and it'd freak her out. Or I'd get turned on by how full I was at a meal and she'd be turned off, etc. So I don't think I could ever date a non-FFA again, sadly, lol.


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## bigpulve (Sep 16, 2008)

I guess I would be a dedicated BHM? I want to lose weight, wouldnt ever ever want to eat in bed, would refuse to gain weight.....


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## Ichida (Sep 16, 2008)

It IS unfortunate when we ruin you for lesser women =P Serves guys like you right for ruining me on thin guys

Just remember not all outgoing FFAs start that way - there are way more that have that inclination but aren't an actual FFA yet - they need the loving, squishing nuturing of a BHM!!!


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## Ichida (Sep 16, 2008)

bigpulve said:


> I guess I would be a dedicated BHM? I want to lose weight, wouldnt ever ever want to eat in bed, would refuse to gain weight.....



I look at dedicated as a guy who LOVES it, cooperative as a guy who is ok, uncoopoerative as like what you said.

And I feel really bad about that....there is SO much sensual pleasure to be had!! Do you mind me asking why? Bad experience?

Not all FFAs want to blimp our guys up - i would be happy if my guy just loved my cooking and enjoyed it for its own sake, having a bigger belly because of it is just a bonus. Like an average joe watching his girls chest growing from a B to a C - you don't demand it but you luxurate in the results


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## Cane (Sep 16, 2008)

Ichida said:


> It IS unfortunate when we ruin you for lesser women =P Serves guys like you right for ruining me on thin guys
> 
> Just remember not all outgoing FFAs start that way - there are way more that have that inclination but aren't an actual FFA yet - they need the loving, squishing nuturing of a BHM!!!



Convert the world. 

For me though, even if the girl hadn't fully realized her tendencies yet, she'd have to at least be... open minded enough to show real potential for improvement.  I.e. if she freaks out at being asked for a belly rub after a few dates, it's probably never going to work.  Or if she ever makes a negative comment about how much I ate at a meal, she's out as well. If, however, there's a passive submissive FFA lying dormant in there, I'd be more than happy to be the dirty BHM that corrupts them. Hahahah.


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## Archangel_257 (Sep 16, 2008)

I would say that I am a dedicated BHM. I love my size right now and I know that even if I lose weight I will never be a small person. I wouldn't say that I am into gaining for gaining's sake, but I am also not going to eat super healthy but tasteless crap either


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## bigpulve (Sep 16, 2008)

Ichida said:


> I look at dedicated as a guy who LOVES it, cooperative as a guy who is ok, uncoopoerative as like what you said.
> 
> And I feel really bad about that....there is SO much sensual pleasure to be had!! Do you mind me asking why? Bad experience?
> 
> Not all FFAs want to blimp our guys up - i would be happy if my guy just loved my cooking and enjoyed it for its own sake, having a bigger belly because of it is just a bonus. Like an average joe watching his girls chest growing from a B to a C - you don't demand it but you luxurate in the results


oh ok....I was a bit confuzzled......

No I have actually never done it, it just doesnt sound appealing to me. I have never eaten in bed. I always thought it was kind of a lazy thing....Ok I did lie....I would eat one thing in bed...but thats part of a womans lovely anatomy. 

oh well I just dont want to be heavier. I was at 350 3 months ago. It was so shocking I dedicated myself fully for the first time ever to lose weight. I just never ever want to be that heavy ever again. But its good to know there are some FFAs that dont want to make there man larger....


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## Ichida (Sep 16, 2008)

LOL patience my dear Cane!!

Remember, there is always one BHM who takes our FA virginity - be gentle!!


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## Cane (Sep 16, 2008)

**sits and ponders the pros and cons of cute little FFA virgins versus fat-loving-whores**


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## Ichida (Sep 16, 2008)

bigpulve said:


> oh ok....I was a bit confuzzled......
> 
> No I have actually never done it, it just doesnt sound appealing to me. I have never eaten in bed. I always thought it was kind of a lazy thing....Ok I did lie....I would eat one thing in bed...but thats part of a womans lovely anatomy.
> 
> oh well I just dont want to be heavier. I was at 350 3 months ago. It was so shocking I dedicated myself fully for the first time ever to lose weight. I just never ever want to be that heavy ever again. But its good to know there are some FFAs that dont want to make there man larger....



I admire bigger guys, and I bet you look far sexier than you think you do at that size. Just remember being fit and being fat can go together - skinny people die of heart attacks all the time.

I think it's great you're being healthy but being fat doesn't change who you are - it just brings out insecurities already there (And it just makes more of you to love).

Maybe you need to find an FA who will love your size for what it is and wont pressure you to gain more?


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## bigpulve (Sep 16, 2008)

Ichida said:


> I admire bigger guys, and I bet you look far sexier than you think you do at that size. Just remember being fit and being fat can go together - skinny people die of heart attacks all the time.
> 
> I think it's great you're being healthy but being fat doesn't change who you are - it just brings out insecurities already there (And it just makes more of you to love).
> 
> Maybe you need to find an FA who will love your size for what it is and wont pressure you to gain more?


Well I do think I look better than most other 315 lb guys....considering I am an adamant weight lifter and exerciser. I know I have low/normal cholesterol and normal blood pressure, I just want to lose weight for myself. To be able to ware a lot more cheaper clothes, not sweat why doing insignificant things, be able to go into a restaurant and not get looked at weirdly...

I actually think I was never "supposed" to be fat. I was skinny until I was about 8 when family things went to hell. and I spent one entire summer eating crap and watching TV in my brothers old room. Also I seem to be of the type that should be eating mostly meat and vegetables, but my Father wanted me to eat only Carbos and less meat. So lots of factors attributed to me gaining lots of weight. 

I would love to find an FFA, but I dont live in a great metropolis like Chicago or New York...Just little old Omaha NE. 

What are the signs again?


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## Ichida (Sep 16, 2008)

Archangel_257 said:


> I would say that I am a dedicated BHM. I love my size right now and I know that even if I lose weight I will never be a small person. I wouldn't say that I am into gaining for gaining's sake, but I am also not going to eat super healthy but tasteless crap either



GOOD i approve. I only eat rice cakes cuz i like the taste LOL. When i go shopping im like...where is the full fat full salt cookies and crackers?????


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## Cane (Sep 16, 2008)

bigpulve said:


> I actually think I was never "supposed" to be fat. I was skinny until I was about 8 when family things went to hell. and I spent one entire summer eating crap and watching TV in my brothers old room. Also I seem to be of the type that should be eating mostly meat and vegetables, but my Father wanted me to eat only Carbos and less meat. So lots of factors attributed to me gaining lots of weight.



Interesting that you'd mention that, I've always felt like I was "supposed" to be fat somehow. Something about having a bigg tall and soft body just suits my gregarious and ostentatious personality, and I like being bigger than virtually everyone else in two different dimensions at 6'3" 290. I've been a fat guy for so long now it's tied to my very sense of identity, I think. 

If you really look inside yourself and see a thin person, though, and you really believe you'd be happier thin, it might be better to endeavor to lose more weight. When you do find an FFA, if you can't appreciate your own size it might put a strain on your relationship, and all the positive and nurturing words in the world from her may not do much to change your inner feelings. Just some thoughts.


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## Tad (Sep 16, 2008)

Ichida said:


> Most of the stories I hear of/read have one side gaining purposefully, with delight - but I'm sure there are tons of relationships where the gaining partner isn't hardwired that way, but they love pleasing their partner by gaining slowly, reassured by their love.



My own experience with this was mixed. Swap the genders around (while I'd love to be a dedicated BHM that has never been part of our relationship). When I met my now wife she was about a size 12/14, but like a lot of women she wasn't eating much and was keeping really active, but both of her parents were quite fat and she loved food. I thought that letting herself enjoy her natural tendencies would be a pure joy for her, even if she didn't start off seeing the appeal in getting fatter. I told her I thought she was too thin, and tried to take away all hte barriers to her gaining. For half a dozen years she did slowly gain, eventually pushing the limits of a size 20.

But she never did come to prefer being fat, and while she never embraced crazy diets or sever work out regimes, in the yeas since she's been slowly ratcheting tighter and tighter the controls on her lifestyle, leading to gradual weight loss. She averages a size 16 right now, and odds are good I'd say that she'll drop smaller yet (sizes have inflated over the years I think, so for clarity I'll say she's lost a third of the weigth that she'd gained, and put on more muscle as well, and she'd like to lose another third of the weight).

So, in our case the re-assurance of love worked for a while, but eventually her basic wiring came to the fore for the most part. They do say that as you get older, you become more yourself, so maybe that was part of it. Or maybe just that half a dozen years into a relationship the dewy-eyed twitterpation has worn off? 

Now, guys might be more amenable to this that women; I think on average guys care a bit less what others think, so long as they are turning on their partner. So I'm not saying that my experience will be your experience. Just saying that....going along for a while doesn't mean total buy in, and experience with embracing the fat side doesn't necessarily lead to liking it more in the end.

Sorry not to be more encouraging. Again, this was just my experience, yours might be rosier. (although on the plus side: we are still together quite happily  The results can only be called mixed from an FA perspective. From a general happiness with life perspective the results are pretty darned good)


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## bigpulve (Sep 16, 2008)

Cane said:


> Interesting that you'd mention that, I've always felt like I was "supposed" to be fat somehow. Something about having a bigg tall and soft body just suits my gregarious and ostentatious personality, and I like being bigger than virtually everyone else in two different dimensions at 6'3" 290. I've been a fat guy for so long now it's tied to my very sense of identity, I think.
> 
> If you really look inside yourself and see a thin person, though, and you really believe you'd be happier thin, it might be better to endeavor to lose more weight. When you do find an FFA, if you can't appreciate your own size it might put a strain on your relationship, and all the positive and nurturing words in the world from her may not do much to change your inner feelings. Just some thoughts.


Well I am almost a foot shorter than you and 25 pound heavier. I dont ever think I will be the 150 lb dude. I want to be around 210ish after a muscle bulk up. I dont really see a thin thin person in side me. I am built like a brick shit house. I have short legs wide shoulders and a stout frame. I just dont want to be this heavy. It is taking a tool on all sorts of things in my head. 

But then again I could be happy at 250....who knows...I havent been 250 for 6 years. and then I just went right by it.


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## Ichida (Sep 16, 2008)

bigpulve said:


> I actually think I was never "supposed" to be fat.



I am 5'3 and 150 lbs. My measurement am 38,28,38 and I am fit enough to give most full grown men pause without being creepy muscular at all. I am not "supposed" to be this muscular and fit - I should be thin and 130 but I started horseback riding and i got bulked out and fit.

It happens - you just need to love your body for what it is. Are there any girls where you go? I bet they drool watching you workout. I know I would! Muscular AND chubby?? **wipes at her drool hastily**

Signs?? There is a posting....FFA dating guide, i think, that might help.

Signs I know I exhibit: Staring from under my lashes (have learned BHM hate being oogled), smiling shyly, eyes drop to the belly often, will take seats where I can see your belly clearly...Hmm...Given the choice to hug or shake your hand ill hug and sink in a little...maybe trail my hands along your sides as I let go. Other signs? If you enjoy eating I might offer desert or more food - not to see you purposefully bulk out but to see the happiness in your eyes and watch you enjoy your food...it's very sensual. To reciprocate if you rubbed your belly and announced you were stuffed i'd probably melt my way under the table or go bright red.

^^ help?


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## Tad (Sep 16, 2008)

Cane said:


> Interesting that you'd mention that, I've always felt like I was "supposed" to be fat somehow. Something about having a bigg tall and soft body just suits my gregarious and ostentatious personality, and I like being bigger than virtually everyone else in two different dimensions at 6'3" 290. I've been a fat guy for so long now it's tied to my very sense of identity, I think.



I've also always felt that I was "supposed" to be fat....other details differ from your experience, but yah.....I don't know how well that lines up with being a dedicated BHM, but I'd have to think that the 'felt' would tend to lead to more happiness actually being?


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## Ichida (Sep 16, 2008)

bigpulve said:


> But then again I could be happy at 250....who knows...I havent been 250 for 6 years. and then I just went right by it.



**heart flutters** I know you're not being mean on purpose but you are such a tease!! **fans herself** 

If you are built solidly and work out n have big muscles I bet 250 would be too thin. Why not try to loose 25 and see how you feel before you comitt to anything drastic? If you feel too thin well - it's always easier to get fatter than thinner!


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## Cane (Sep 16, 2008)

bigpulve said:


> Well I am almost a foot shorter than you and 25 pound heavier. I dont ever think I will be the 150 lb dude. I want to be around 210ish after a muscle bulk up. I dont really see a thin thin person in side me. I am built like a brick shit house. I have short legs wide shoulders and a stout frame. I just dont want to be this heavy. It is taking a tool on all sorts of things in my head.
> 
> But then again I could be happy at 250....who knows...I havent been 250 for 6 years. and then I just went right by it.



Yeah, I probably shouldn't have used the word "thin." I'd say keep eating healthy, keep exercising, and when you get to a point (never mind what weight it is) where you feel happy, healthy, and more comfortable about yourself, that's where your body should be. But try to think about how you're 'hardwired,' as seems to be a recurring theme in this thread. You might find you're hardwired to be a fat guy after all; with a little coaxing, I realized I looooved being able to grab and bounce my own belly around haha.


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## HDANGEL15 (Sep 16, 2008)

Ichida said:


> Not all FFAs want to blimp our guys up - i would be happy if my guy just loved my cooking and enjoyed it for its own sake, having a bigger belly because of it is just a bonus. Like an average joe watching his girls chest growing from a B to a C - you don't demand it but you luxurate in the results



*(((ICHIDA))) awesome words I couldn't AGREE MORE...........:eat2:*


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## Ichida (Sep 16, 2008)

No I know what you mean Edx, and I agree...

And that is something I considered too...but I realized that although fat attraction is an aspect of our relationship I wouldn't love him less because of it. When you know you are with the right one sometimes you have to let some things go


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## bigpulve (Sep 16, 2008)

Ichida said:


> I am 5'3 and 150 lbs. My measurement am 38,28,38 and I am fit enough to give most full grown men pause without being creepy muscular at all. I am not "supposed" to be this muscular and fit - I should be thin and 130 but I started horseback riding and i got bulked out and fit.
> 
> It happens - you just need to love your body for what it is. Are there any girls where you go? I bet they drool watching you workout. I know I would! Muscular AND chubby?? **wipes at her drool hastily**
> 
> ...


Ah I see....well I am just not comfortable with my size now....When I was 270 was the outer limits of me being sorta ok with it....I think I would be pretty ok anywhere between 200 and 250.....preferably near 200. 

Its a 24 hour fitness where I work out. Its at 10 at night so there are not very many people there let alone being the one lone FFA that is probably in this town. I what most people would call a firm fat dude. My fat doesnt really "jiggle". I like that fact. But I am a big man. 

Yeah I did read that FFA dating guide...It was for uh.....research, yeah research. :blush: 

Huh....I think I may have already met some FFAs in my life......I should probably start watching more.


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## Cane (Sep 16, 2008)

Ichida said:


> No I know what you mean Edx, and I agree...
> 
> And that is something I considered too...but I realized that although fat attraction is an aspect of our relationship I wouldn't love him less because of it. When you know you are with the right one sometimes you have to let some things go



One of my really good female friends, who will remain nameless should she ever stumble onto this board, told me recently that her fiance (boyfriend of like 8 years) is an FA with serious feeder potential. She's always been quite slim, and every time she's gained any weight seems quite angry about it and usually loses it quite quickly. And yet, their relationship survived through junior high, high school, and now the college years, and it's quite possible they'll live happily ever after. So even on the EXTREME end of non-compliance (uncooperative), it's still apparently quite possible to make things work!


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## Ichida (Sep 16, 2008)

bigpulve said:


> Yeah I did read that FFA dating guide...It was for uh.....research, yeah research. :blush:
> 
> Huh....I think I may have already met some FFAs in my life......I should probably start watching more.



**wrinkles her nose at 200 to show what she thinks of that** I could flip you over and pin you down at that weight **grins slyly** but maybe you like that, neh?

Research, eh? **Grins hugely and rubs her hands together** Soak it up !! Us FFAs need you BHM to ask us out and delightfully torture us sillywith your sexay bodies!1


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## bigpulve (Sep 16, 2008)

Ichida said:


> **wrinkles her nose at 200 to show what she thinks of that** I could flip you over and pin you down at that weight **grins slyly** but maybe you like that, neh?
> 
> Research, eh? **Grins hugely and rubs her hands together** Soak it up !! Us FFAs need you BHM to ask us out and delightfully torture us sillywith your sexay bodies!1


That actually sounds sort of.............

















fun. 




I have got to find an FFA and take notice, which is hard for me, the notice part, and I will then be able too....


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## Cane (Sep 16, 2008)

bigpulve said:


> I have got to find an FFA and take notice, which is hard for me, the notice part, and I will then be able too....



Trust me, it's not as hard as you think. It's the negative thoughts in your head that prevent you from noticing FFAs, not their subtlety; believe me, they're not NEARLY as subtle about it as you might think. Keep your eyes open, keep your attitude positive, and you will notice women admiring you in public places. Trust me.


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## bigpulve (Sep 16, 2008)

Cane said:


> Trust me, it's not as hard as you think. It's the negative thoughts in your head that prevent you from noticing FFAs, not their subtlety; believe me, they're not NEARLY as subtle about it as you might think. Keep your eyes open, keep your attitude positive, and you will notice women admiring you in public places. Trust me.


Well I seem to be a little inept at noticing woman....not sure why. My mother has had to point out them out for me sometimes.....


I have a new thing to do in public now.


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## Ichida (Sep 16, 2008)

bigpulve said:


> Well I seem to be a little inept at noticing woman....not sure why. My mother has had to point out them out for me sometimes.....
> 
> 
> I have a new thing to do in public now.



Rub your belly as if you don't notice you're doing it, or just place your palm against it.

I find with most FFAs I know, our eyes are drawn to that gesture like bees to nectar.

And don't worry about being inept - most guys claim that, and most girls rnt much better.


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## Cane (Sep 16, 2008)

bigpulve said:


> Well I seem to be a little inept at noticing woman....not sure why. My mother has had to point out them out for me sometimes.....
> 
> 
> I have a new thing to do in public now.



Haha don't worry! Most guys have a talent for being oblivious when it comes to women checking them out/flirting with them. My suspicion though is that most of the time this comes from the guy being too inwardly insecure to properly recognize the signs. I.e. you notice a girl staring in the direction of your belly in the corner of your eye, but instead of thinking "that girl's checking me out" you think "she was probably looking at something else" or "she's probably just disgusted" and move on. If you assume women aren't going to be flirting with you or checking you out, then you'll miss the signs when they are doing it.


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## Ichida (Sep 16, 2008)

It's hard for us FFA to be obvious. Staring out of "oohh god he's hot" can be easily miscontrued as looks of "Ugh...he's gross"

Little comments like "Haha, would you me so mean that you'd tape me to the wall while I was drunk??"

"I'd need an awul lot of duct tape" **grin**

I find cute and sexy but you may take the wrong way. It's a comment saying "I notice it. I see it. I like it. I'll make sure you know I am ok with it, its no big deal" Because if we ignore it you might loose weight n we love ya the way you are!

So if you get gently teased it might not be in a mean way!


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## bigpulve (Sep 16, 2008)

Ichida said:


> Rub your belly as if you don't notice you're doing it, or just place your palm against it.
> 
> I find with most FFAs I know, our eyes are drawn to that gesture like bees to nectar.
> 
> And don't worry about being inept - most guys claim that, and most girls rnt much better.


When I am sitting on a couch or something I usually put my fingers together and rest them on my stomach....I do know that my coworker flirts with me all the damn time.....but we have already had the conversation and it seems there is nothing really there.....so that is actually helping me.



Cane said:


> Haha don't worry! Most guys have a talent for being oblivious when it comes to women checking them out/flirting with them. My suspicion though is that most of the time this comes from the guy being too inwardly insecure to properly recognize the signs. I.e. you notice a girl staring in the direction of your belly in the corner of your eye, but instead of thinking "that girl's checking me out" you think "she was probably looking at something else" or "she's probably just disgusted" and move on. If you assume women aren't going to be flirting with you or checking you out, then you'll miss the signs when they are doing it.


Well you see its the very first part I dont notice.....Im not sure but I just dont see it....literally. A chick could come right up to me and tell me and I probably would still not notice...

But I do understand you on the insecure part.....I am kinda insecure....But whats funny is most of the time I am not.....I have very little shame and will almost do anything. But when it comes to woman my shame goes from none to off the scales....I need to figure that one out.


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## Cane (Sep 16, 2008)

Ichida said:


> It's hard for us FFA to be obvious. Staring out of "oohh god he's hot" can be easily miscontrued as looks of "Ugh...he's gross"
> 
> Little comments like "Haha, would you me so mean that you'd tape me to the wall while I was drunk??"
> 
> ...




Yeah, right on the money. The main difference between an FFA teasing you about your weight and anyone else is that an FFA will probably be blushing and have a big mischievous grin on her face while she's doing it.


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## bigpulve (Sep 16, 2008)

Ichida said:


> It's hard for us FFA to be obvious. Staring out of "oohh god he's hot" can be easily miscontrued as looks of "Ugh...he's gross"
> 
> Little comments like "Haha, would you me so mean that you'd tape me to the wall while I was drunk??"
> 
> ...


Oh I have learned over the years the difference between malicious and fun teasing....I just dont always pick the right one......


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## Ichida (Sep 16, 2008)

MMM **shamelessly pictures you with your hands clasped over your tummy and drools**

You don't have to answer this, so DONT feel pressured...but wanna give your captivated audience a pant size? **looks hopeful**


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## bigpulve (Sep 16, 2008)

Ichida said:


> MMM **shamelessly pictures you with your hands clasped over your tummy and drools**
> 
> You don't have to answer this, so DONT feel pressured...but wanna give your captivated audience a pant size? **looks hopeful**



um..........I wear a 50 over my stomach.....



Im probably a 44-46 under.


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## BuddhaThunder (Sep 16, 2008)

bigpulve said:


> Oh I have learned over the years the difference between malicious and fun teasing....I just dont always pick the right one......



I got nothing but love for you. :wubu:


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## cammy (Sep 16, 2008)

Ichida said:


> - but I'm sure there are tons of relationships where the gaining partner isn't hardwired that way, but they love pleasing their partner by gaining slowly, reassured by their love.
> 
> Any thoughts?



This is pretty much the situation between me and my BHM husband. He's a BHM on the natch, and although he accepts his stature, he's spent most of his life trying to be on the thinner side of it, which is where he was when we met. But in short order, he began gaining, and despite periodically complaining about his wieght and sometimes actually starting a diet, he's continued steadily upward to his current "fattest ever" size. And yes, its definately because he knows I'm an FFA who loves his fat and loves to feed him, and that pleasing me is a very good thing. But also, I think it must be somewhat of a relief for him to know that I not only love him, but am also attracted to him, in his naturally fat state.


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## bigpulve (Sep 16, 2008)

BuddhaThunder said:


> I got nothing but love for you. :wubu:


well thanks.


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## BuddhaThunder (Sep 16, 2008)

bigpulve said:


> well thanks.



Wait ... are we allowed to whore up here too? :noes:


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## BuddhaThunder (Sep 16, 2008)

bigpulve said:


> um..........I wear a 50 over my stomach.....
> 
> 
> 
> Im probably a 44-46 under.



We're of the same waist size ...


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## Ichida (Sep 16, 2008)

ohhhh verrrryyy nice!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**gets out that fan again**


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## BuddhaThunder (Sep 16, 2008)

Being new in a forum sucks ... so many links to click ... so little time.


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## bigpulve (Sep 16, 2008)

BuddhaThunder said:


> Wait ... are we allowed to whore up here too? :noes:


I dont believe so honey bunny.....I think they look down upon that sorta thing....


But look around a bit.....:blush:


BuddhaThunder said:


> We're of the same waist size ...


Really? wow....


Ichida said:


> ohhhh verrrryyy nice!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
> 
> **gets out that fan again**


Hey now......keep your pants on....









ok well nevermind.....


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## bigpulve (Sep 16, 2008)

BuddhaThunder said:


> Being new in a forum sucks ... so many links to click ... so little time.


yeah....I have been on here for like 10 days and am still finding stuff...



Go to the BHM top 40...some good stuff in there.


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## Ichida (Sep 16, 2008)

LOL 

Well I'd undo yours but I think I'd have to dig a little hehehe...


How many FFA's or BHM love that part of the belly you have to actually reach UNDER to undo their pants? That chubby underside thats sooo soft n giving? :smitten:


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## BuddhaThunder (Sep 16, 2008)

bigpulve said:


> yeah....I have been on here for like 10 days and am still finding stuff...
> Go to the BHM top 40...some good stuff in there.



I like it ... I can stretch my brain around here.


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## bigpulve (Sep 16, 2008)

Ichida said:


> LOL
> 
> Well I'd undo yours but I think I'd have to dig a little hehehe...
> 
> ...


I ware mine over my stomach so.....sorry? 


I need to workout tonight....



is it ok If I get a little OT in hurr?


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## Ichida (Sep 16, 2008)

cammy said:


> and that pleasing me is a very good thing. But also, I think it must be somewhat of a relief for him to know that I not only love him, but am also attracted to him, in his naturally fat state.



LOL it IS a very good thing isn't it??

And I agree totally. i think even if they rnt gainers they can still appreciate that we love them that way and it is a relief!


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## bigpulve (Sep 16, 2008)

BuddhaThunder said:


> I like it ... I can stretch my brain around here.


hyde park or something is up your alley......



pretty interesting discussions in there.....seems to be a left slate though.


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## Ichida (Sep 16, 2008)

LOL noooo not ovverrrrrr you cant disguise that loveliness with a piece of fabric!!

OT?


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## bigpulve (Sep 16, 2008)

Ichida said:


> LOL noooo not ovverrrrrr you cant disguise that loveliness with a piece of fabric!!
> 
> OT?



Oh well that is were I feel its comfortable....I couldnt put them under....I would feel like I was hanging out and that makes me uncomfortable....but seems to be okey dokey by you. 

OT= off topic...mean posting stuff that isnt of the nature of the thread.


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## BuddhaThunder (Sep 16, 2008)

bigpulve said:


> Oh well that is were I feel its comfortable....I couldnt put them under....I would feel like I was hanging out and that makes me uncomfortable....but seems to be okey dokey by you.
> 
> OT= off topic...mean posting stuff that isnt of the nature of the thread.



I've never liked "covering" up my belly. It just doesn't seem natural. Then again, with a tucked shirt, the belly really doesn't seem all that intrusive.

Wearing my pants on my belly reminds me of the old folk at the nursing home.


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## Ichida (Sep 16, 2008)

Sure or you can start your own...**answers distractedly**
oooohh...hanging out.....

You sir, are a relentless tease!!!!!!!!


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## bigpulve (Sep 16, 2008)

BuddhaThunder said:


> I've never liked "covering" up my belly. It just doesn't seem natural. Then again, with a tucked shirt, the belly really doesn't seem all that intrusive.
> 
> Wearing my pants on my belly reminds me of the old folk at the nursing home.


Im not wearing screech pant here. I put them about where my belly button is....the back is around where most people think is natural....



Ichida said:


> Sure or you can start your own...**answers distractedly**
> oooohh...hanging out.....
> 
> You sir, are a relentless tease!!!!!!!!


Im sorry.....I dont mean to be....


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## Ichida (Sep 16, 2008)

Bhudda - tshirt tucked it gets a BIGG thumb up...it makes it sooo much easier to oogle the curves!!

And you are sooo not sorry pulve - or if you are you shouldn't be ^.~


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## bigpulve (Sep 16, 2008)

Ichida said:


> Bhudda - tshirt tucked it gets a BIGG thumb up...it makes it sooo much easier to oogle the curves!!
> 
> And you are sooo not sorry pulve - or if you are you shouldn't be ^.~


what can I say........I have been called a tease before in my life.....


Hehe.


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## Cane (Sep 16, 2008)

Ichida said:


> How many FFA's or BHM love that part of the belly you have to actually reach UNDER to undo their pants? That chubby underside thats sooo soft n giving? :smitten:



Oo that's my faavorite part of my belly. I love feeling the weight on top pushing down against my fingers.


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## BuddhaThunder (Sep 16, 2008)

Ichida said:


> Bhudda - tshirt tucked it gets a BIGG thumb up...it makes it sooo much easier to oogle the curves!!



 Thanks.


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