# Not many BBW on the Paysite Board



## Les Toil (Oct 28, 2009)

I've always noticed SSBBW outnumber BBW on the Paysite board about 90%. Is there a reason for that? Since there's more BBW sites out in the net than SSBBW sites, I'm just wondering why that isn't reflected in that forum. Are the posts for BBW sites basically ignored? Is it because the FAs on Dimensions prefer SSBBW over BBW? It's also ironic that there's more BBW that are active members on Dims than SSBBW, although it's the other way around in the Paysite forum. Have the BBW paysite posters felt unwelcome there, or, again, is it the simple fact we FAs just prefer SSBBW over their smaller sisters?


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## Jon Blaze (Oct 28, 2009)

It sounds like a combination of the factors you mentioned.

I don't have a preference for ssbbws over bbws, but I'm sure there are many that do.


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## KHayes666 (Oct 28, 2009)

Most bbw with paysites become ssbbw.....lol simple as that.


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## Theotherone (Oct 28, 2009)

I think what KHayes666 says is true for a variety of reasons. One is economic. These sites get a lot more eyes when they can caption a picture spread as more to measure or do a before and after comparison set.


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## BothGunsBlazing (Oct 28, 2009)

Interesting thread. I recently saw a post on the paysite forum that was something along the lines of the model saying "Look how much bigger I've gotten!" and some dude responding with "YOU CALL THAT BIG?!" 

So, yeah, I'd imagine THAT would be a deterrent. There just seems to be a lot of pressure to gain in the industry. The bigger you are, the more natasfans you'll have. 

Another reason may also be the "novelty" factor. I've seen a lot of men, especially those outside the US, post about how rare it is to see a woman who is 400+ or so.


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## musicman (Oct 29, 2009)

The paysite ladies should probably answer this question, but I'll throw in my opinion. I think there is clearly a positive feedback cycle going on, i.e. the FAs who like SSBBWs have learned that the really big ladies will be here, so they visit more often, and the SSBBWs know that their particular type of FA will be here, so they post more often, etc. But I think there is more to it. Over the years, the Dimensions "brand" (first the magazine, then the website, and now the bashes) has always represented a place where SSBBWs are welcomed and feel comfortable, at least in my observation. For example, the Dim bash in June had a markedly higher percentage of SSBBWs than any NAAFA event I've ever attended. 

I'm sure there are other factors too, like the hardcore/softcore issue. Since the board allows no hardcore pics, most of the posts are for softcore sites (but not all). Perhaps this fits better with the SSBBW sites, and with the FAs who want to see them. The other kinds of sites simply advertise elsewhere.


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## Webmaster (Nov 1, 2009)

Les Toil said:


> I've always noticed SSBBW outnumber BBW on the Paysite board about 90%. Is there a reason for that? Since there's more BBW sites out in the net than SSBBW sites, I'm just wondering why that isn't reflected in that forum. Are the posts for BBW sites basically ignored? Is it because the FAs on Dimensions prefer SSBBW over BBW? It's also ironic that there's more BBW that are active members on Dims than SSBBW, although it's the other way around in the Paysite forum. Have the BBW paysite posters felt unwelcome there, or, again, is it the simple fact we FAs just prefer SSBBW over their smaller sisters?



Good observation, and it's pretty much always been that way. Maybe it's the same syndrome that has car magazines feature a disproportionate number of Ferraris, Lamborghinis and Porsches and such.


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## Weeze (Nov 1, 2009)

Webmaster said:


> Good observation, and it's pretty much always been that way. Maybe it's the same syndrome that has car magazines feature a disproportionate number of Ferraris, Lamborghinis and Porsches and such.



Well, I do drive a tercel.


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## Tooz (Nov 1, 2009)

Webmaster said:


> Good observation, and it's pretty much always been that way. Maybe it's the same syndrome that has car magazines feature a disproportionate number of Ferraris, Lamborghinis and Porsches and such.





krismiss said:


> Well, I do drive a tercel.



So, I was not the only one who gleaned something less than positive about BBWs from this.


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## BeautifulPoeticDisaster (Nov 1, 2009)

I don't even know what to say really except veroooom veroooom baby.


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## Tau (Nov 1, 2009)

Tooz said:


> So, I was not the only one who gleaned something less than positive about BBWs from this.


No, you really weren't


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## Wagimawr (Nov 1, 2009)

Les Toil said:


> Is it because the FAs on Dimensions prefer SSBBW over BBW?





Webmaster said:


> Maybe it's the same syndrome that has car magazines feature a disproportionate number of Ferraris, Lamborghinis and Porsches and such.


..........


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## Tooz (Nov 1, 2009)

Tau said:


> No, you really weren't



Good. I know now where a lot of the worries smaller BBW have here come from...


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## BeautifulPoeticDisaster (Nov 1, 2009)

Tooz said:


> Good. I know now where a lot of the worries smaller BBW have here come from...



TBH it wasn't very flattering for ssbbws either. Everyone may "want" or fantasize about a super fast sports car....but most men own a standard car.


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## Shosh (Nov 1, 2009)

In a way I guess it evens things up. BBW'S would be in greater demand modelling wise in the wider cyber world than SSBBW's. So SSBBW'S get to shine here.


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## Tooz (Nov 1, 2009)

BigBellySSBBW said:


> TBH it wasn't very flattering for ssbbws either. Everyone may "want" or fantasize about a super fast sports car....but most men own a standard car.



I guess, but the analogy was likening SSBBW to a car that has superior engineering and is overall "premium." You know what I mean? I say this full well knowing I am classified as the smaller end of SSBBW...


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## Weeze (Nov 1, 2009)

Susannah said:


> In a way I guess it evens things up. BBW'S would be in greater demand modelling wise in the wider cyber world than SSBBW's. So SSBBW'S get to shine here.



smaller bbw's, maybe.


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## mergirl (Nov 1, 2009)

Webmaster said:


> Good observation, and it's pretty much always been that way. Maybe it's the same syndrome that has car magazines feature a disproportionate number of Ferraris, Lamborghinis and Porsches and such.




Need i say more??
Perhaps 
and a bit of


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## TraciJo67 (Nov 1, 2009)

Hello, my name is Traci and I'm a Honda Accord.


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## bigsexy920 (Nov 1, 2009)

SOOOO does this mean Im an Honda Element? Im far to round to be such a square car.


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## Jon Blaze (Nov 1, 2009)

"Attention shoppers. The next 18 people that order an orange smoothie will get a complimentary... Nissan Sentra."


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## TraciJo67 (Nov 1, 2009)

Jon Blaze said:


> "Attention shoppers. The next 18 people that order an orange smoothie will get a complimentary... Nissan Sentra."



I'll take 18 orange smoothies, please.


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## Weeze (Nov 1, 2009)

TraciJo67 said:


> I'll take 18 orange smoothies, please.



Maybe then you can upgrade to a leather interior.


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## TraciJo67 (Nov 1, 2009)

krismiss said:


> Maybe then you can upgrade to a leather interior.



Well, I was thinking more that I could claim all 18 Sentras, sell them all, and buy me a ... Jaguar XJ. Roar.


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## cinnamitch (Nov 1, 2009)

I have a feeling i am a Model T


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## swamptoad (Nov 1, 2009)

Webmaster said:


> Good observation, and it's pretty much always been that way. Maybe it's the same syndrome that has car magazines feature a disproportionate number of Ferraris, Lamborghinis and Porsches and such.




I understand this point that you are making. I first thought ... _huh?_ _Syndrome?_ But you aren't talking about that word in its medical sense. I see it as a characteristic patterns or coincidental actions. Though I don't really understand why? I think its just indicative of this communities social norm, as most members view the abundancy of size as something virtuous to praise. :bow: 

And I don't really recall there being a higher or even number of bbws to ssbbws in the paysite, _ever_. Not to say that they are any less or any more beautiful.

I think all should feel welcome and participative anywhere on the forum -- paysite model or not. ssbbw or bbw, doesn't matter.

I just feel that there should be an inclination to appreciate curves in general. I don't think so much focus should be placed on the size and number of a certain specific. If I were asked what I'd like to see ... I'd want to see more of both --- (ssbbw and bbw.)


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## Carrie (Nov 1, 2009)

All I know is, a "Wide Load" bumper sticker looks just as good on a Mini Cooper as on a Suburban, knowwhatImsayin?



p.s. you're all fat.


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## cinnamitch (Nov 1, 2009)

Carrie said:


> All I know is, a "Wide Load" bumper sticker looks just as good on a Mini Cooper as on a Suburban, knowwhatImsayin?
> 
> 
> 
> p.s. you're all fat.



Wanna say that to my face? I have pudding in a pool, and i am not afraid to wrestle in it. You bring the whipped cream


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## Weeze (Nov 1, 2009)

Carrie said:


> All I know is, a "Wide Load" bumper sticker looks just as good on a Mini Cooper as on a Suburban, knowwhatImsayin?
> 
> 
> 
> p.s. you're all fat.



Someone rep her for me. DO IT.


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## BigBeautifulMe (Nov 1, 2009)

tried, Krissy. Can't.


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## wrestlingguy (Nov 1, 2009)

So, I suppose that Fantasy Feeder would be like a custom shop where you can change Hyundais into Hummers?


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## swamptoad (Nov 1, 2009)

krismiss said:


> Someone rep her for me. DO IT.




d o n e.


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## missy_blue_eyez (Nov 1, 2009)

I suppose another point is, everyones idea of what or who is bbw or who is ssbbw is different....I would class myself at the higher end of bbw personally, but someone else may look at me and say im ssbbw.....

So you may look at some girls on the paysite board and think...'Wow hot bbw' while some others are looking at her thinking 'Wow hot ssbbw'.........

I actually read somewhere a couple of nights ago that if you are over 300lb's you are categorised as ssbbw.......below that you are bbw, and I think so called website said if you were below 250lb's you were a plumper or something....everyones perception is different?!

Maybe?


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## Jon Blaze (Nov 1, 2009)

missy_blue_eyez said:


> I suppose another point is, everyones idea of what or who is bbw or who is ssbbw is different....I would class myself at the higher end of bbw personally, but someone else may look at me and say im ssbbw.....
> 
> So you may look at some girls on the paysite board and think...'Wow hot bbw' while some others are looking at her thinking 'Wow hot ssbbw'.........
> 
> ...



Nope. You're right. The perception is all different.


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## swamptoad (Nov 1, 2009)

missy_blue_eyez said:


> I suppose another point is, everyones idea of what or who is bbw or who is ssbbw is different....I would class myself at the higher end of bbw personally, but someone else may look at me and say im ssbbw.....
> 
> So you may look at some girls on the paysite board and think...'Wow hot bbw' while some others are looking at her thinking 'Wow hot ssbbw'.........
> 
> ...





I agree. Perspective is important. I also think height to weight correlations also make a difference as well.

Yes, perception is different.


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## Webmaster (Nov 1, 2009)

mergirl said:


> Need i say more??
> Perhaps
> and a bit of



You just don't get it.


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## Shosh (Nov 2, 2009)

Webmaster said:


> Good observation, and it's pretty much always been that way. Maybe it's the same syndrome that has car magazines feature a disproportionate number of Ferraris, Lamborghinis and Porsches and such.



I think it is actually nice how SSBBW's are glorified here. All other body types get more attention and admiration elsewhere. Maybe the SSBBW'S are the Ferrari's and Porches of the Dimensions paysite board.

I prefer an Audi though.


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## KHayes666 (Nov 2, 2009)

Susannah said:


> I think it is actually nice how SSBBW's are glorified here. All other body types get more attention and admiration elsewhere. Maybe the SSBBW'S are the Ferrari's and Porches of the Dimensions paysite board.
> 
> I prefer an Audi though.



I know absolutely nothing about cars....so if I see one that works, good enough for me ;-)


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## Aust99 (Nov 2, 2009)

missy_blue_eyez said:


> I suppose another point is, everyones idea of what or who is bbw or who is ssbbw is different....I would class myself at the higher end of bbw personally, but someone else may look at me and say im ssbbw.....
> 
> So you may look at some girls on the paysite board and think...'Wow hot bbw' while some others are looking at her thinking 'Wow hot ssbbw'.........
> 
> ...



I absolutely agree... I weigh enough to fit in the ssbbw category but I'm 6' tall, so looking at myself I would say I was a bbw (from my own observations on people who identity as ssbbw compared to my own size).

It's all about perception and it really is different for everyone.

Hope I have made sense.


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## mergirl (Nov 2, 2009)

Webmaster said:


> You just don't get it.


Oh i do.. i do 'Get it'.
That you are comparing fatter women to luxury cars, which should be on show because they are better. As opposed to thinner women who are rarely shown because they are not as luxurious somehow. The fact that you are comparing women to cars, a comodity, an inanimate object...
I get it... i really do. 
I think many bbws would argue that actually 'you' just don't get it. WINK


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## Shosh (Nov 2, 2009)

mergirl said:


> Oh i do.. i do 'Get it'.
> That you are comparing fatter women to luxury cars, which should be on show because they are better. As opposed to thinner women who are rarely shown because they are not as luxurious somehow. The fact that you are comparing women to cars, a comodity, an inanimate object...
> I get it... i really do.
> I think many bbws would argue that actually 'you' just don't get it. WINK



Here we go again, making something out of nothing for goodness sake. That is becoming so tedious here.

Conrad was referring to a " Syndrome" that exists.

Maybe for some SSBBW'S are the epitome of beauty, whereas BBW'S are the ultimate for other men.
Must everything be a competition?

Must every group be catered for at all times just to please the masses?

As I have said BBW'S garner most of the attention in the wider world, so it is kind of nice to have SSBBW'S put up on a pedestal for a change.


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## bdog (Nov 2, 2009)

mergirl said:


> Oh i do.. i do 'Get it'.
> That you are comparing fatter women to luxury cars, which should be on show because they are better. As opposed to thinner women who are rarely shown because they are not as luxurious somehow. The fact that you are comparing women to cars, a comodity, an inanimate object...
> I get it... i really do.
> I think many bbws would argue that actually 'you' just don't get it. WINK



When I was 12 some of my friends had posters of sports cars on their walls. They couldn't drive. They didn't know about auto-insurance. They probably thought there was a pretty good chance they'd have a car like that one day. However, if everyone in their neighborhood had a Porsche I'm quite sure they wouldn't have a poster of one on their wall.

Does that make more sense? I don't really know but I would guess he was commenting on the nature of fantasy, not the quality of the car (or woman). 

In your defense I had to scratch my head for a moment as well.


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## mergirl (Nov 2, 2009)

Susannah said:


> Here we go again, making something out of nothing for goodness sake. That is becoming so tedious here.



...............................


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## mergirl (Nov 2, 2009)

bdog said:


> When I was 12 some of my friends had posters of sports cars on their walls. They couldn't drive. They didn't know about auto-insurance. They probably thought there was a pretty good chance they'd have a car like that one day. However, if everyone in their neighborhood had a Porsche I'm quite sure they wouldn't have a poster of one on their wall.
> 
> Does that make more sense? I don't really know but I would guess he was commenting on the nature of fantasy, not the quality of the car (or woman).
> 
> In your defense I had to scratch my head for a moment as well.


Ahh ok.. Like ssbbws are like rare cars. I see now. 
Maby Conrad should make his fat people/machinary analalogies clearer in future.


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## Tania (Nov 2, 2009)

On a scale from Karl Lagerfeld to Fred Rogers, this thread *almost* scores a Hugh Hefner.

Way to go, Dims.


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## bdog (Nov 2, 2009)

mergirl said:


> Ahh ok.. Like ssbbws are like rare cars. I see now.
> Maby Conrad should make his fat people/machinary analalogies clearer in future.



Erm, yes, and to rephrase, it's not necessary to fantasize about that which you see all the time.

And yes, maybe he should, and maybe you should remember all he's done for size acceptance before assuming the worst.


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## Tooz (Nov 2, 2009)

bdog said:


> And yes, maybe he should, and maybe you should remember all he's done for size acceptance before assuming the worst.



I think what was said came out wrong. I don't know what was intended as he has not clarified (and that fact does not bode well), but given the climate here, surely you can see how it could be interpreted? Just because Conrad said it does not mean it has a 100% positive meaning, you know? Just food for thought.

The problem with Dims is not the "bigger is better" attitude, it's the fact that "smaller is NOT" is included in that sentiment, unsaid.


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## mergirl (Nov 2, 2009)

bdog said:


> And yes, maybe he should, and maybe you should remember all he's done for size acceptance before assuming the worst.



What he said was not conducive with 'size acceptance' which is why i questioned it. 
I wasn't assuming the worst because what he said was pretty strange anyway. No assumptions only observations... Comparing women to cars for one thing..
I'm not familiar with all he has done for 'size acceptance', perhaps you can give me a historical recap.


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## Sandie_Zitkus (Nov 2, 2009)

I wanted to post something , but not sure what. Since this post said exactly what I felt, I'll just say:

What Susannah said!" 






Susannah said:


> Here we go again, making something out of nothing for goodness sake. That is becoming so tedious here.
> 
> Conrad was referring to a " Syndrome" that exists.
> 
> ...


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## missy_blue_eyez (Nov 2, 2009)

Do you know what, I actually liked Conrad's analogy in some way, because for the best part of our lives, cars and sexuality have gone together like bread and butter........how often do you see on the front of a auto mag a teeny tiny blonde draped across the front? Its actually nice to have the scenario reversed somewhat....I may not be a SSBBW and be the 'Porsche' many FA's dream of......but to some guy Im the more than just a Vauxhall Corsa, again its all relative.....some of the women on here get some of the FA's engines going....and some of the women dont and vice versa.......I think we can all honestly say that what some people find attractive, others do not? And nor do we expect them too......so some guy may be eyeing up a Lamborghini thinking 'wow thats my ride' where some guys are wowed by a modded up VW Van! Its all relative!


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## Weeze (Nov 2, 2009)

I'm... really concerned... with the number of women agreeing with this and/or taking it as a compliment. Really.


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## exile in thighville (Nov 2, 2009)

this is easy though: bigger girls are rarer to see in real life - especially outside the u.s., hence more demand for their paysites. to a lesser extent, girls being paid to take pictures of their fat bodies are likely to gain weight.


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## missy_blue_eyez (Nov 2, 2009)

krismiss said:


> I'm... really concerned... with the number of women agreeing with this and/or taking it as a compliment. Really.


I wouldnt say it was a compliment, nor am I offended by it.......I can not criticise someone for merely advocating their preference with the car analogy. Everyone does it.........i.e the saying that goes around about men whom prefer larger women....... 'bones are for the dog, meat is for the man' its an analogy which in turn glorifies the preference for a large woman? How is that any different? If somebody wishes to liken their preference to a car then fair enough.......Im not gonna be pissed off just because I may not fit into their category of what they deem beautiful. Who cares? Really? I may not be the SSBBW of somes dreams, but Im the BBW which others may find attractive.........and likewise......there are men on here who may not be the Christian Louboutin's Ive dreamed of.....but others I will look at (i.e le boyfriend) who is....so what? 

Yes I likened a man to a pair of dream shoes............is that so wrong?


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## mergirl (Nov 2, 2009)

Ive never heard the saying 'bones are for the dog, meat is for the man'.. how bizarre. Does it mean that skinny women only get to go out with arseholes? Animals? That those who go out with big women (meat) are real men? Its such a strange saying, which i'm sure was written by a man. On a thread in here recently i saw that someone had said "you don't go into the butcher just for the seasoning"... Its like people are pieces of meat.. and what skinny women are the flavouring? So So.. well bizzare.. and nasty. 
Again.. not size acceptance..whatever way you paint it. Same with the car analogy. Anything that suggests one size of people are better somehow than another size is not size acceptance. Comparing women to Cars and Meat is kinna just crass. 
Whatever though i guess eh?


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## missy_blue_eyez (Nov 2, 2009)

Maybe his likening had nothing to do with size acceptance, thats correct and maybe it had everything to do with his personal preference....which is allowed?! Or are we not allowed to vocalize that now without someone getting a bee in their bonnet because it may offend!?! Im sorry, but it all comes down to the point again dosent it where if that analogy was said by a BBW about a man, I doubt you would have had such a massive problem with it.


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## mergirl (Nov 2, 2009)

Cars, meat and fat people maby..I imagine a fat car meat human cyborg perhaps.
Yeah..its just that.. isn't this site ment to be respectful to fat people and be advocating of size acceptance? I think people have been feeling left out by the 'preferences' of some..which is a pity because fat people should be made to feel like they fit in here as much as fa's.


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## exile in thighville (Nov 2, 2009)

Conrad Made A Joke


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## exile in thighville (Nov 2, 2009)

the answer to this thread is the natasfan factor


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## exile in thighville (Nov 2, 2009)

natasfan factor
natasfan factor
natasfan factor
natasfan factor
natasfan factor
natasfan factor
natasfan factor


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## mergirl (Nov 2, 2009)

exile in thighville said:


> Conrad Made A Joke


AAAhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh..
ok


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## missy_blue_eyez (Nov 2, 2009)

In all seriousness though, just in conversation with Mark and he did just liken me to the batmobile.......



View attachment movie-batmobile.jpg


Apparently he had many a fantasy about owning one of those 

Damn and there was me thinking id be the Aston Martin DB7 of his dreams!


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## mergirl (Nov 2, 2009)

missy_blue_eyez said:


> In all seriousness though, just in conversation with Mark and he did just liken me to the batmobile.......
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Are you kidding?? To be the batmobile you would have to weigh at LEAST 800lbs!!!


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## BigCutieSasha (Nov 2, 2009)

exile in thighville said:


> this is easy though: bigger girls are rarer to see in real life - especially outside the u.s., hence more demand for their paysites. to a lesser extent, girls being paid to take pictures of their fat bodies are likely to gain weight.



Exactly what I was going to say.


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## Wagimawr (Nov 2, 2009)

missy_blue_eyez said:


> owning


Hmm. This might also be a part of the problem.


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## missy_blue_eyez (Nov 2, 2009)

Wagimawr said:


> Hmm. This might also be a part of the problem.


Its ok, he's aware that he wears the trousers.....but I tell him what colour!


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## Sandie_Zitkus (Nov 2, 2009)

missy_blue_eyez said:


> Its ok, he's aware that he wears the trousers.....but I tell him what colour!




OMG - I love that! :bow:


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## OneWickedAngel (Nov 2, 2009)

I know the basic history of Dims and I fully understand why the paysites are populated mostly with SSBBW beauties and I begrudge no one for it. I know it irks some BBWs that it is that way, but it has never bothered me personally. It’s the general “syndrome” that permeates the majority of the boards that I think is what gets to some. 

When I was first told about Dimensions, I perceived it as a place where ALL women who feel fat and marginalized by the mainstream world can find a home. While I was having fun in the games section it was fine and I felt welcomed enough. It was only until I started participating in the discussions that I was hit with the internal size-archy of Dims and yes there is one. I imagine the reality check is similar for most BBWs upon first coming here. It’s not a matter of trying to make everyone happy, but tell us where do we, the BBWs, fit in here? 

As a BBW I feel like we are the middle child of the beauty world. We are too much to be the cute baby of the family (the slender beauty ideal of the outside world), yet we are too little to have the respect almost automatically granted the elder child (the SSBBW beauty ideal of Dims). Now here we are in the bastion of fat beauty being given various euphemisms and/or analogies that yet again place our beauty as “less than”. How are we not supposed to feel somewhat slighted when a place that promotes size-acceptance does not always make us feel accepted because of our size?


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## Tooz (Nov 2, 2009)

OneWickedAngel said:


> I know the basic history of Dims and I fully understand why the paysites are populated mostly with SSBBW beauties and I begrudge no one for it. I know it irks some BBWs that it is that way, but it has never bothered me personally. Its the general syndrome that permeates the majority of the boards that I think is what gets to some.
> 
> When I was first told about Dimensions, I perceived it as a place where ALL women for feel fat and marginalized by the mainstream world can find a home. While I was having fun in the games section it was fine and I went welcomed enough. It was only until I started participating in the discussions that I was hit with the internal size-archy of Dims and yes there is one. I imagine the reality check is similar for most BBWs upon first coming here. Its not a matter of trying to make everyone happy, but tell us where do we, the BBW fit, in here?
> 
> As a BBWs I feel like we are the middle child of the beauty world. We are too much to be the cute baby of the family (the slender beauty ideal of the outside world), yet we are too little to have the respect almost automatically granted the elder child (the SSBBW beauty ideal of Dims). Now here we are in the bastion of fat beauty being given various euphemisms and/or analogies that yet again place our beauty as less than. How we not supposed to feel somewhat slighted when a place that promotes size-acceptance does not always make us feel accepted because of our size?



I don't think anyone has said it better or will say it better. This is exactly it. EXACTLY.


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## mergirl (Nov 2, 2009)

Tooz said:


> I don't think anyone has said it better or will say it better. This is exactly it. EXACTLY.


I agree!! That was poetic!


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## Tau (Nov 2, 2009)

OneWickedAngel said:


> I know the basic history of Dims and I fully understand why the paysites are populated mostly with SSBBW beauties and I begrudge no one for it. I know it irks some BBWs that it is that way, but it has never bothered me personally. Its the general syndrome that permeates the majority of the boards that I think is what gets to some.
> 
> When I was first told about Dimensions, I perceived it as a place where ALL women for feel fat and marginalized by the mainstream world can find a home. While I was having fun in the games section it was fine and I went welcomed enough. It was only until I started participating in the discussions that I was hit with the internal size-archy of Dims and yes there is one. I imagine the reality check is similar for most BBWs upon first coming here. Its not a matter of trying to make everyone happy, but tell us where do we, the BBW fit, in here?
> 
> As a BBWs I feel like we are the middle child of the beauty world. We are too much to be the cute baby of the family (the slender beauty ideal of the outside world), yet we are too little to have the respect almost automatically granted the elder child (the SSBBW beauty ideal of Dims). Now here we are in the bastion of fat beauty being given various euphemisms and/or analogies that yet again place our beauty as less than. How we not supposed to feel somewhat slighted when a place that promotes size-acceptance does not always make us feel accepted because of our size?



Exactly. I don't understand how Conrad's comment is ok, can even be vaguely seen as ok. It reminded me of the boys my friends and I hung out with who would make deliberatley snide comments to me while praising my far thinner friends to high heaven. I don't have a problem with SSBBW's being on the paysite forum - the conversation was just fine till then. What got me was when BBW's on a size acceptance size got told that they aren't as beautiful or desirable as their fatter sisters - and try to explain it as much as you want to, that's what he said. I don't care what gets your motor going but it is rude to say to those who don't get you hard that, oh sorry, you're just not as hot. Before I came to Dims I believed we all, all, had something to learn from each other, experiences to share and strength to gain. I guess we don't.


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## TraciJo67 (Nov 2, 2009)

Dimensions isn't about size acceptance. 

It's about worship of fat bodies, and the fatter, the better.

I don't think that there's anything inherently wrong with that, but I do wish we'd just ... stop ... pretending that size acceptance issues matter here. 

It would also put a stop to the angst-filled questions. 

I'd love to see a disclaimer like this: 

Dims is probably not a good fit for:

* People who do not want to be objectified because they are fat - or want their fat to be seen as just a part of who they are, not the sum total of _what_ they are 

* People who are unwilling/unable to tolerate poor behavior that often goes hand-in-hand with so-called "newbies" learning the ropes

* People who are unable/unwilling to tolerate extremes in others

* People who are unhappy with any aspect of their size

* People who are considering, or who have had, weight loss surgery

* People who feel that any aspect of humiliation based on size is degrading

People who can be flexible and tolerant of all different types of behaviors, forms of expression, and methods of communication -- some of them extreme -- will probably find a happy middle ground and a useful niche at Dims. 

I don't mean that as an insult, for those who are asking the usual "why is it OK to objectify" questions here. FWIW, I have the same questions. I am just starting to wonder if my time would be better served seeking answers elsewhere**, or at least, not feeling the constant need to _ask_ certain questions.

**Disclaimer: Not an angst-filled "Goodbye Cruel Dims" post. Just a statement of fact: I'm not sure that I can be enthusiastic and happy -- or even just _quiet_, about certain issues. It's not who or what I'm about. The internal conflicts that it creates, for me, are just not worth it. This is an internet message board, not fat (or any other kind of) mecca.


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## mergirl (Nov 2, 2009)

Tau said:


> Exactly. I don't understand how Conrad's comment is ok, can even be vaguely seen as ok. ......................................... Before I came to Dims I believed we all, all, had something to learn from each other, experiences to share and strength to gain. I guess we don't.



There are a lot of experiences to share and things to learn from each other Tau..i really believe that. Its just a case of sorting out the wheat from the chaff and REFUSING to belive it when we are told we are less beautiful than anyone else because of our size. *Cant believe i am having to say this here*
Don't let any comments put you off believing in what you do, because it really is the truth. There are even lessons to learn when what people say or believe is hurtful or rediculous. You can learn to chose what to believe and what not to and most importantly to trust yourself and your own judgement. Actually, sometimes i think we can learn more from negitive experiences than positive, even if that lesson is to never repeat the negative again! 
:bow: -Hmm this is kinna like a hug and a headbut!


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## BeautifulPoeticDisaster (Nov 2, 2009)

Dammit Traci.....I need to spread my love around before I give it to you again. But EXACTLY.


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## panhype (Nov 2, 2009)

Les Toil said:


> I've always noticed SSBBW outnumber BBW on the Paysite board about 90%. Is there a reason for that? ... Are the posts for BBW sites basically ignored? Is it because the FAs on Dimensions prefer SSBBW over BBW?


I don't think things have always been like now... Flashback. In my memory i'm loading the Paysite Board from a random day in November 2005 (old style board software, yah remember?). I see lots of BBWs posting. The themes of the photos are different as well, way less eating sets.

The change may have to do with a variety of things. And i would think it doesn't reflect the popularity of SSBBW or BBW sites in general. My guess: A lot of BBW paysite models are only staying away because they assume there is no audience for them on the board. Imagine a new BBW model who comes to the Paysite Board for the first time and checks the threads - she easily can get such an idea. This tendency probably has started years ago when SSBBW/gaining sites started to make an impact (started to reach a 'critical mass' ... was hesitating a bit with these words ...)

But all this has more to do with 'dynamics of perception' rather than true preferences of the Paysite Board visitors. Just recently i talked to a model who is a regular poster. She is a BBW, she doesn't gain (or selling that fantasy) and she doesn't do eating sets. Nonetheless her stats are always showing her that she is getting lots of traffic from the Paysite Board.


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## mergirl (Nov 2, 2009)

BigBellySSBBW said:


> Dammit Traci.....I need to spread my love around before I give it to you again. But EXACTLY.


yeah.. i canny rep her either..but she is spot on!!


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## OneWickedAngel (Nov 2, 2009)

TraciJo67 said:


> Dimensions isn't about size acceptance.
> 
> It's about worship of fat bodies, and the fatter, the better.
> 
> ...





BigBellySSBBW said:


> Dammit Traci.....I need to spread my love around before I give it to you again. But EXACTLY.





mergirl said:


> yeah.. i canny rep her either..but she is spot on!!



I got her!


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## Santaclear (Nov 2, 2009)

No reason to feel insulted or overlooked. It's just a matter of preference. Small to midsize BBWs are like mopeds. And women in the 150 to 180 pounds range are like getting a stank-ass seat on a crowded bus in the ghetto.


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## mergirl (Nov 2, 2009)

Santaclear said:


> No reason to feel insulted or overlooked. It's just a matter of preference. Small to midsize BBWs are like mopeds. And a woman in the 150 to 180 pounds range is like a stank-ass seat on a crowded bus in the ghetto.


Indeed. I used to weigh less than that.. i was practically a walk!


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## Jon Blaze (Nov 2, 2009)

TraciJo67 said:


> Dimensions isn't about size acceptance.
> 
> It's about worship of fat bodies, and the fatter, the better.
> 
> ...




I don't agree with that. Not that fat admiration doesn't take precedence, but it isn't the only thing emphasized. I'm well aware that some of the users don't necessarily believe in Size Acceptance as much as the former, and there are better places to go for strictly the latter, but this site isn't just about the former. The former is just more important to most, with the other things being auxiliary. 

But I do understand how you feel. There are many posts that I won't comment about.


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## Jes (Nov 2, 2009)

www.cuckoo.com


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## Jes (Nov 2, 2009)

Tau said:


> What got me was when BBW's on a size acceptance size got told that they aren't as beautiful or desirable as their fatter sisters - and try to explain it as much as you want to, that's what he said. .



Don't put words in his mouth. What he said was that thinner Dims women look less like cars than fatter Dims women do. 



(in case that's unclear: tau, i agree with you).


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## thatgirl08 (Nov 2, 2009)

Sometimes I wonder why certain people still stick around if they feel unwelcome or can't stand most aspects of this site. Don't get me wrong, his comment was ill worded at best, it's not like I don't agree with you, but still.. it's like, if Dims isn't your cup of tea.. why are you wasting your time and everyone elses time (since we have to wade through your hundreds of posts of bitching) on this site?


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## Fascinita (Nov 2, 2009)

Exactly! At Dims, it is just a matter of preference! Every man has his. 

For example, the smaller BBWs are burros.

Burros are not as rare as Ferraris--or as cool, let's face it--but they get the job done, knowwhatimean knowhatimean. 

Wink wink!


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## Tooz (Nov 2, 2009)

thatgirl08 said:


> if Dims isn't your cup of tea.. why are you wasting your time and everyone elses time (since we have to wade through your hundreds of posts of bitching) on this site?



This is pretty fucking cold, and maybe you don't get it, but most people spend a lot of time looking for places to belong and Dims is as close as it gets. Instead of bitching that women should just leave, why not try to remedy the problem on some level?


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## thatgirl08 (Nov 2, 2009)

Tooz said:


> This is pretty fucking cold, and maybe you don't get it, but most people spend a lot of time looking for places to belong and Dims is as close as it gets. Instead of bitching that women should just leave, why not try to remedy the problem on some level?



I was specifically talking about a handful of members who mostly argue with other people and post about how much they don't like it here and how much this isn't a place they want to associate with. I think most everyone knows who I'm referring to. If telling them to leave is me being cold, so be it. 

Honestly, you post the most inflammatory shit and then turn around and act like _I'm_ such a cunt. I don't get it. If you have a problem, PM and we'll talk. If not, then please don't follow me around the forum giving me shit for everything I post. Thanks.


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## KHayes666 (Nov 2, 2009)

*grabs popcorn and sits back* this autta be good


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## mergirl (Nov 2, 2009)

thatgirl08 said:


> Sometimes I wonder why certain people still stick around if they feel unwelcome or can't stand most aspects of this site. Don't get me wrong, his comment was ill worded at best, it's not like I don't agree with you, but still.. it's like, if Dims isn't your cup of tea.. why are you wasting your time and everyone elses time (since we have to wade through your hundreds of posts of bitching) on this site?



Good. 
Also, there are a lot of people who feel the same. Like Tooz says, for many this is the only place some people have got, for the time being. You can't blame people for trying to change something they disagree with or don't like. When there are a LOT of people who disagree about the same thing, perhaps changes might even occur. Change doesn't happen if you don't speak out. I can't understand why anyone would have a problem with this, unless the change was going to affect them personally in some way.


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## exile in thighville (Nov 2, 2009)

cat noises


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## Tooz (Nov 2, 2009)

thatgirl08 said:


> I was specifically talking about a handful of members who mostly argue with other people and post about how much they don't like it here and how much this isn't a place they want to associate with. I think most everyone knows who I'm referring to. If telling them to leave is me being cold, so be it.
> 
> Honestly, you post the most inflammatory shit and then turn around and act like _I'm_ such a cunt. I don't get it. If you have a problem, PM and we'll talk. If not, then please don't follow me around the forum giving me shit for everything I post. Thanks.



Baby girl, I'm simply returning your bluntness. I believe we have had this discussion before. You can not deny what you said was not really quite mean. If you can't take it, don't dish it out.  And don't flatter yourself, I don't follow ANYONE around on Dims to "give them shit." That would take entirely too much time and yield little in entertainment. Relax.

Anyway, somehow I missed Traci's post and I don't know how. I agree, though. I think the size acceptance slant on this site is cultivated more by the women who come here (overall-- there are, of course, exceptions). In the end, Dims is an admiration site which has had some mild skewing in the direction of SA.

I, personally, would like to see MORE SA, but it ight just be a pipe dream...


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## thatgirl08 (Nov 2, 2009)

mergirl said:


> Good.
> Also, there are a lot of people who feel the same. Like Tooz says, for many this is the only place some people have got, for the time being. You can't blame people for trying to change something they disagree with or don't like. When there are a LOT of people who disagree about the same thing, perhaps changes might even occur. Change doesn't happen if you don't speak out. I can't understand why anyone would have a problem with this, unless the change was going to affect them personally in some way.



I understand that. Of course there are some aspects of this site I personally don't like as well. I'm talking about a small handful of people whos entire Dims identity is based on making fun of other members, accusing people of anti-women behavior, hating feederism and complaining about practically every aspect of this site. I truly wonder why they waste their own time here if its THAT bad.


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## thatgirl08 (Nov 2, 2009)

Tooz said:


> Baby girl, I'm simply returning your bluntness. I believe we have had this discussion before. You can not deny what you said was not really quite mean. If you can't take it, don't dish it out.  And don't flatter yourself, I don't follow ANYONE around on Dims to "give them shit." That would take entirely too much time and yield little in entertainment. Relax.



I still don't think it was mean. Maybe some people are just too sensitive.

ETA: baby girl? condescending blah blah


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## exile in thighville (Nov 2, 2009)

Tooz said:


> Baby girl,



it's so nice of them to train you early for their jobs after they croak


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## Fascinita (Nov 2, 2009)

Point of clarification:

Urban dictionary defines "baby girl" as...

1. a close friend that is a girl
2. a girlfriend

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=baby girl

---

*waves @ thighs*

Still fighting the good fight for SA, eh? You old battle ax!


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## James (Nov 2, 2009)

ok.

Once again we seem to be going round and round in circles. 

Since I don't want things to get any more snide or unpleasant, I'm going to close this thread for the time being with a note to remind you all that this part of dimensions is the FA forum. This doesn't mean that there is no right to reply from non-FAs but there is also a right for FAs to express preference for the body characteristics that they are attracted to. Whether a metaphor to do so is poorly chosen or not is not the sole issue 'here'... in 'this' particular space at least. 

I can see how it would have been more considerate to express preference in a way that didn't imply devaluation of other body types. I can also see how it is important for posters in this forum have a right to express preference... and to do so comfortably... 

Since the deeper question here regards the relationship between fat admiration and size acceptance, I'd like to direct you all to a thread to discuss this dynamic. Input from all parties will be welcome in this thread but I ask that it is expressed civilly and constructively.


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