# It's been a while, have a few questions.



## lewrs (Dec 12, 2016)

Hello FA/BBW/BHM community. 

I have returned to this community as my life as a FA is getting pretty lonely again :blush:

I've always struggled being a FA due to social stigma and whatever but a couple of years ago got my first proper GF. We had a great time as we were both virgins and learning from each other. I even felt good as we both had problems emotionally and had hard lives yet I felt we were helping each other out.

Things changed quickly however and problems started appearing. The first major problem is that I'm shy and don't display much affection in public (Long story for why but that's just me) she took it as me being embarrassed to be with her but that's wasn't the case. I was stressed for a lot of reasons last Christmas as my life was falling apart. I lost my job and was supporting us financially as well as supporting her emotionally without getting any myself so eventually our relationship fell apart. 

A year has passed and now the loneliness is setting in. She has a new boyfriend now but we are on good terms (I genuinely am happy that I gave her confidence and set her on a better path). I however have had a bad year and not really done much and feel I need someone to give me strength again (Not that I've been looking hard).

So I have a few questions.

Firstly Is it not ok that I don't go over the top when it comes to public affection? Like I'm not like that with my Friends and Family too it's just who I am. I more than make up for it when I'm in private with people :wubu:

Second how should I move on from this? I feel trapped. My social life atm is a disaster, I have a low paying temporary job and feel I need someone to help my get through this but at the same time I won't get anyone till I get through this. Thoughts?


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## Tad (Dec 12, 2016)

I think clearly signalling that you are a couple, at least a fair portion of the time, is the most key part. That shows up in how close you stand, matching walking speeds, willingness to touch in passing, how you position yourself/where you look, etc. Some people may want more public displays of affection, but could understand that not everyone is comfortable with those. But if your actions/behavior leave doubt in a stranger's mind on whether the two of you are a couple, I would see that as an issue (and not really an FA issue, just a general couples issue).

Although you don't have to worry so much about what strangers think, you just need to make sure that you are communicating to your partner, regularly, "I'm so happy to be with you." Doing that all of the time, in all situations, is pretty important IMO.


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