# Ideal size for a BHM?



## squeezablysoft (May 2, 2016)

*What do you think is the perfect BHM size, subjectively for you personally as an FFA/gay FA? You can use poundage/measurements/other indicators (double-chin, sausage fingers, moobs, etc.) whatever works for you but I used BMI for the poll cause weight is just so variable depending on height for true fatness level. *


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## fat hiker (May 2, 2016)

No selections above BMI of 40? 

It seems a little odd as a BMI of 40 is not all that big - various NFL football players such as 'da Fridge' William Perry (BMI 46 when the Bears won the SuperBowl, 53 when he played in the UK) and Aaron Gibson (BMI 47, 50 when in high school) have been much above 40, let alone more 'non-athletic' BHMs.

After all, a BMI of 50 is just 369 pounds on a six foot tall guy, or 400 pounds if he's 6'3".


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## Tad (May 2, 2016)

I do have a suspicion that most people wouldn't start thinking of a guy as a BHM until at least the mid-30s, in BMI terms. Then again, maybe that is just my feelings on it.


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## squeezablysoft (May 2, 2016)

*I used this chart to come up with the ranges, was in a hurry when I made this, will do some more research and see if I can come up with any further classifications for the >40 set.

https://images.search.yahoo.com/ima...am1=16370594&param2=3644548&param4=1745615390*


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## squeezablysoft (May 2, 2016)

*Ok, sorry I'm being an idiot, is there a way to edit a poll you created or do I just need to start over?*


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## Tad (May 2, 2016)

Look at the top right corner of the poll iteself. If you can edit it, the edit button will be there. If you don't see it, let me know how you want it to be, and I can use magical moderator powers to fix it up.


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## Xyantha Reborn (May 2, 2016)

I can't comment because I never judge based on BMI. Weight and pant size combo is usually my go to. 

Also, BMI turns me off as a medical thing; I never think about it in conjunction with a sexy BHM


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## Tad (May 2, 2016)

After some PM with SS, I changed the poll categories. Not sure I got them quite how she wanted, but I had a limited window so just took a stab at it.

I also deleted the two existing votes, hopefully it will allow people to re-vote -- not sure as I've never re-done this before.

For reference, for a guy of average height (5'10"), one BMI point is about seven pounds (half a stone). So for the ranges in the poll, for this mythical roughly average and arithmetically convenient guy:

Overweight starts at 175 lbs 
Obese I starts at 210 lbs
Obese II starts at 245 lbs
Obese III starts at 280 pounds
Obese IV starts at 350 pounds
'bigger than that' starts at 420 pounds.


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## squeezablysoft (May 2, 2016)

*Thanks for finding the obesity categories and fixing the poll for me Tad, you're awesome! *


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## Xyantha Reborn (May 2, 2016)

Default would be class II for me, but i find class III super sexy too. Above that weight it is very bhm specific as opposed to general statement


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## MattB (May 2, 2016)

On behalf of Class II we thank you, and invite you to sign up to our newsletter for more great content like this!

*RIGHT NOW!*


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## Xyantha Reborn (May 2, 2016)

I only do picture books, Matt :batting::batting::batting:


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## bigmac (May 2, 2016)

My personal opinion is that once a guy has more than 25% body fat it really starts to affect his physical abilities. I know that its does for me. At 280 pounds I'm about 18% body fat. That's a size I could be happy with (about 25 pounds less than I weigh now).


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## dwesterny (May 2, 2016)

Sorry, the correct answer was 367 pounds 3 ounces. Again the answer we were looking for is 367 pounds 3 ounces. Thank you for playing.


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## Xyantha Reborn (May 2, 2016)

bigmac said:


> My personal opinion is that once a guy has more than 25% body fat it really starts to affect his physical abilities. I know that its does for me. At 280 pounds I'm about 18% body fat. That's a size I could be happy with (about 25 pounds less than I weigh now).



As an FA, if you had your druthers, what would the amount you'd find irrisistable on HER be though?


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## squeezablysoft (May 2, 2016)

Xyantha Reborn said:


> As an FA, if you had your druthers, what would the amount you'd find irrisistable on HER be though?



*Methinks a corresponding poll for the fellas might be in order. And here it is: http://www.dimensionsmagazine.com/forums/showthread.php?t=119312*


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## bigmac (May 2, 2016)

Xyantha Reborn said:


> As an FA, if you had your druthers, what would the amount you'd find irrisistable on HER be though?




This is an interesting question. My wife bought a pair of size 4 jeans this afternoon. When we met she couldn't find any jeans big enough to fit her 90+ inch hips.


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## Xyantha Reborn (May 3, 2016)

I meant more that most of us F/fa have double standards with our own bodies, unless gainers/enjoying being fat ourselves. 

So when bm commented i was curious to know what his standard was as an FA, not just as a big guy.


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## bigmac (May 3, 2016)

Xyantha Reborn said:


> I meant more that most of us F/fa have double standards with our own bodies, unless gainers/enjoying being fat ourselves.
> 
> So when bm commented i was curious to know what his standard was as an FA, not just as a big guy.



I have a very broad range -- I've been with women from about 120 pounds to over 600 pounds. But over the years I've been most attracted to women in the 280-320 pound range.

Regardless of what I find attractive in women they've only found me attractive when I wasn't too fat.


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## LeoGibson (May 3, 2016)

I guess that makes me a class III.

Although much the same as bigmac, my personal preferenes run a wide spectrum.


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## loopytheone (May 3, 2016)

I'm loving this class system, I feel like I'm grading a bunch of extremely sexy lorries or something. 

My current partner is a class 3 (just) and I always think of him as being pretty small to be honest! Though he is short too so that might be why. My last ex was in the 'bigger than that' section and that is my preference, though obviously it isn't a huge deal to me or anything.


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## squeezablysoft (May 3, 2016)

Xyantha Reborn said:


> I meant more that most of us F/fa have double standards with our own bodies, unless gainers/enjoying being fat ourselves.
> 
> So when bm commented i was curious to know what his standard was as an FA, not just as a big guy.



*Interesting idea re: Double standard for ideal self vs ideal partner. Almost makes me wanna start yet another new thread. But I think we can discuss it here.*


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## squeezablysoft (May 3, 2016)

*I've been attracted to guys all across the spectrum, but I picked Class III cause that's really the sweet spot for me. It's very educational checking ppl out on Feabie, I always knew I liked fat boys, but I had no idea just how fat some of the boys I liked were. Most overweight ppl and many Class I obese ppl barely even look fat to me. I wonder if this is an American (where almost everyone is fat) thing, an F/FA thing, a fat person thing (I'm repping Team Overweight here, but just 14#s till I move "up the ranks" to Class I obese!) or just my own personal weirdness?*


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## kittymahlberg (May 3, 2016)

squeezablysoft said:


> *Most overweight ppl and many Class I obese ppl barely even look fat to me. I wonder if this is an American (where almost everyone is fat) thing, an F/FA thing, a fat person thing (I'm repping Team Overweight here, but just 14#s till I move "up the ranks" to Class I obese!) or just my own personal weirdness?*



This! From the time I was young to the present day, I've always found myself thinking, "Yeah, so-and-so is pretty average size, really," only to hear that person or a third party talk about how they are SOOOO fat. When it's the other person, sometimes you can chalk it up to people hating on themselves as motivation to lose weight. Whatever works for you, I guess, though it always makes me feel bad. If you want to lose weight to improve your health, that's great, but you don't have to hate on yourself in the process.

I still remember one of my earliest crushes, when I was about 12. He was pretty chubby, I guess, but I remember being shocked when my . . . let's call them peers rather than friends . . . all responded to my declaration of interest with, "But he's FAT!" Before I could even get mad at them for being a bunch of shallow twits, I was confused they considered him that big.

But then, I answered Class IV. Also, I grew up and still live in a part of the USA that's known for being really overweight. When I took a trip to Europe last year, it kind of freaked me out. I'd never realized I was so used to being surrounded by fatties! Feel kind of spoiled now. But also less weird. I mean, when the vast majority of people around you look a certain way, I think the weird thing is finding that type unattractive, not the other way around....


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## squeezablysoft (May 3, 2016)

kittymahlberg said:


> This! From the time I was young to the present day, I've always found myself thinking, "Yeah, so-and-so is pretty average size, really," only to hear that person or a third party talk about how they are SOOOO fat. When it's the other person, sometimes you can chalk it up to people hating on themselves as motivation to lose weight. Whatever works for you, I guess, though it always makes me feel bad. If you want to lose weight to improve your health, that's great, but you don't have to hate on yourself in the process.
> 
> I still remember one of my earliest crushes, when I was about 12. He was pretty chubby, I guess, but I remember being shocked when my . . . let's call them peers rather than friends . . . all responded to my declaration of interest with, "But he's FAT!" Before I could even get mad at them for being a bunch of shallow twits, I was confused they considered him that big.
> 
> But then, I answered Class IV. Also, I grew up and still live in a part of the USA that's known for being really overweight. When I took a trip to Europe last year, it kind of freaked me out. I'd never realized I was so used to being surrounded by fatties! Feel kind of spoiled now. But also less weird. I mean, when the vast majority of people around you look a certain way, I think the weird thing is finding that type unattractive, not the other way around....



*Me too, Southerner born and bred. I do feel so incredibly lucky to be an American FFA. And as much as it bugs me that fat ppl are so underrepresented in the media compared to real life, I'd rather have it this way than the other way round (lots of chubsters on TV/magazines but few irl), I guess then I'd understand how ppl who like slim ppl feel. But truly I believe American F/FAs are the luckiest of humans, and I'm very grateful. Almost wanna sing about it "Oh, I'm proud to be an American, where at least I know we're fat". :happy:*


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## balletguy (May 4, 2016)

. Almost wanna sing about it "Oh, I'm proud to be an American, where at least I know we're fat". :happy:[/COLOR][/B][/QUOTE]

Now that is a great and funny song.


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## squeezablysoft (May 4, 2016)

balletguy said:


> . Almost wanna sing about it "Oh, I'm proud to be an American, where at least I know we're fat". :happy:[/COLOR][/B]



Now that is a great and funny song.[/QUOTE]

*I'm thinking of actually sitting down and writing a full version (I once did a glasses fetish parody of Kenny Chesney's "She thinks my tractors sexy", considering doing an FA version of that too). Oh, and I haven't got it all worked out yet, but the US national anthem should end "And the land of the o-bese and the home of the (fat? round? stout? plump?)".*


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## balletguy (May 4, 2016)

squeezablysoft said:


> Now that is a great and funny song.



*I'm thinking of actually sitting down and writing a full version (I once did a glasses fetish parody of Kenny Chesney's "She thinks my tractors sexy", considering doing an FA version of that too). Oh, and I haven't got it all worked out yet, but the US national anthem should end "And the land of the o-bese and the home of the (fat? round? stout? plump?)".*[/QUOTE]

Love it. So true


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## fat hiker (May 4, 2016)

bigmac said:


> My personal opinion is that once a guy has more than 25% body fat it really starts to affect his physical abilities. I know that its does for me. At 280 pounds I'm about 18% body fat. That's a size I could be happy with (about 25 pounds less than I weigh now).



That's a good point - it's not just about the total weight, but how much is fat, and how much is the underlying muscular body. You could be 280 and 18% fat, or even 10% fat, and be the same BMI as a guy who is 280 and 50% fat - and you'd look quite different, and appeal to different F/FAs.

Personally I think guys look better when they've got a fair big of muscle and bone under the fat - like a strong guy who 'let himself go'. Big guts need big shoulders and big legs, in my opinion.


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## fat hiker (May 4, 2016)

Speaking of charts, here's one: the fatter guys were more likely to survive their first heart attacks:*
http://ilovefat.tumblr.com/post/248506009/weighty-obesity-survival-paradox-from
*


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## Melian (May 4, 2016)

Like others have said, it really depends on the guy. I chose Class II, although my bf is Class I and hot as all fuck.


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## agouderia (May 5, 2016)

loopytheone said:


> I'm loving this class system, I feel like I'm grading a bunch of extremely sexy lorries or something.



Hmm - sexy lorries??? Need to think a little more about that one.

Without being an objectophiliac (but at the same time a rather devout pacifist - I'm scared as hell of tanks since a childhood attendance of a military parade) - I do have to say that fighter jets are hot as hell. There is something to their aggressive flying phallic symbolism that almost made me swoon when visiting an air base and actually being able to inspect and touch one.



fat hiker said:


> Personally I think guys look better when they've got a fair big of muscle and bone under the fat - like a strong guy who 'let himself go'. Big guts need big shoulders and big legs, in my opinion.



Definitely - this is also the decisive point for me. It's not so much the weight or weight category per se, but more how it's carried and that it comes across with a certain elementary force appeal. 
What is a major turn off in my book is the scrawny type with a big beer belly - it just seems unnatural and also unhealthy to me.


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## loopytheone (May 5, 2016)

agouderia said:


> Hmm - sexy lorries??? Need to think a little more about that one.
> 
> Without being an objectophiliac (but at the same time a rather devout pacifist - I'm scared as hell of tanks since a childhood attendance of a military parade) - I do have to say that fighter jets are hot as hell. There is something to their aggressive flying phallic symbolism that almost made me swoon when visiting an air base and actually being able to inspect and touch one.



Hahaha, sorry, lorries over here are sorted by weight into different classes, and you need a different type of licence to drive different classes/weights of lorries. So you can probably see the comparison there!


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## Jeannie (May 6, 2016)

I saw that Tad picked more than one class so since I couldn't decide, I did as well. I like them all! I think I need visuals for each class to make a better decision. :happy:


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## Xyantha Reborn (May 6, 2016)

There was an option to pick more than one!?


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## bigmac (May 7, 2016)

fat hiker said:


> ...
> 
> Personally I think guys look better when they've got a fair big of muscle and bone under the fat - like a strong guy who *'let himself go'*. Big guts need big shoulders and big legs, in my opinion.



Always hated the phrase "let himself go". I've been fat since I was a little kid and have put a lot of effort into not getting fatter. Some people have to work just so things don't get worse.


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## fat hiker (May 9, 2016)

bigmac said:


> Always hated the phrase "let himself go". I've been fat since I was a little kid and have put a lot of effort into not getting fatter. Some people have to work just so things don't get worse.



But then you haven't 'let yourself go', have you?

Glad to meet someone else who has to work just so things don't get worse!


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## bigmac (May 10, 2016)

fat hiker said:


> But then you haven't 'let yourself go', have you?
> 
> Glad to meet someone else who has to work just so things don't get worse!



Unfortunately many people can and do assume I have _let myself go._

I actually don't mind working out and eating healthy. It just pisses me off that people assume I don't.


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## Tad (May 11, 2016)

I've told a few people: "at my one year old check-up I already weighed 32 pounds, when we were learning about weights in grade one I learned that I weighed 50% more than almost all my classmates. Honestly, that I'm only this fat is surprising -- I could so easily be so much bigger." Those few I've done this with haven't seemed to know how to respond to that -- I think they were pretty much running on a 'thin is good' script, and weren't ready for an actual discussion.

(I don't mention that I kind of like, however .... )

=================================

Maybe some people really are built to get fat -- I mean, in this community we pretty much know it. But this study on some dogs was interesting:

http://www.eurekalert.org/pub_releases/2016-05/cp-wlr042716.php

I heard it discussed with a doctor on the radio the other day, and he added some additional information that doesn't seem to show up in the summaries of the study:

- the impact of the mutation is that the dogs' bodies can't tell that they have sufficient body fat, so the feedback is always that they are too thin, and need to put on more weight. Hence they are hungry more.
- he indicated that almost no humans have the major mutation seen in some retrievers, but that there are less mutations in those genes, having more muted but similar effects. Where the body is less sensitive to the amount of fat that it is carrying, so tends to set at a higher percentage body fat before it turns off hunger. 

I really wonder if I have some variation of that, because at no weight have I ever not found myself hungry for more food than I know I should have.

I also wonder if there could be epigenetic effects around the same gene, where environmental and dietary and so on factors could impact how well the gene gets expressed?


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## squeezablysoft (May 11, 2016)

Tad said:


> I've told a few people: "at my one year old check-up I already weighed 32 pounds, when we were learning about weights in grade one I learned that I weighed 50% more than almost all my classmates. Honestly, that I'm only this fat is surprising -- I could so easily be so much bigger." Those few I've done this with haven't seemed to know how to respond to that -- I think they were pretty much running on a 'thin is good' script, and weren't ready for an actual discussion.
> 
> (I don't mention that I kind of like, however .... )
> 
> ...



*Sounds plausible. I've always had a problem with being hungry, when I was little I'd wake my mom up for "breakfast" at 3 am lol. *


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## Melian (May 11, 2016)

Tad said:


> I also wonder if there could be epigenetic effects around the same gene, where environmental and dietary and so on factors could impact how well the gene gets expressed?



There are epigenetic effects at numerous genes that favour weight gain in humans (eg. loss of imprinting disorders on c15) and other species (eg. rats with constituitive expression of agouti protein), and there is also evidence for epigenetic inheritance related to weight/blood pressure/insulin production (one of many summaries: http://www.pnas.org/content/105/44/17046.long).


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## squeezablysoft (May 11, 2016)

*I will actually get sick if I go to long without eating, I mentioned it here and someone said it might be because I'm addicted to sugar (which I totally am).

http://www.dimensionsmagazine.com/forums/showthread.php?t=119265 *


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## Xyantha Reborn (May 11, 2016)

Melian said:


> There are epigenetic effects at numerous genes that favour weight gain in humans (eg. loss of imprinting disorders on c15) and other species (eg. rats with constituitive expression of agouti protein), and there is also evidence for epigenetic inheritance related to weight/blood pressure/insulin production (one of many summaries: http://www.pnas.org/content/105/44/17046.long).




I love when you talk that dirty talk :kiss2:


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## squeezablysoft (May 11, 2016)

*Then there is this from about 16:46-18:25
[ame]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nb8lP7_FCys[/ame]
I was really surprised when he said a normal person can eat and then not want to eat again for 6-8 hours, is this really normal y'all? Cause I had lunch around noon, a snack at 3, and since a little after 4 my stomach has been trying to eat itself. And dinner is still an hour away.  *


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## Tad (May 11, 2016)

squeezablysoft said:


> *
> I was really surprised when he said a normal person can eat and then not want to eat again for 6-8 hours, is this really normal y'all? Cause I had lunch around noon, a snack at 3, and since a little after 4 my stomach has been trying to eat itself. And dinner is still an hour away.  *



I don't know -- I almost always finish meals still hungry, and just have to use a mix of habit and willpower to stop eating. I don't really stop being hungry very often


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## loopytheone (May 11, 2016)

Everybodies metabolism and body works differently. I have some friends who easily go 6-8 hours between meals and are perfectly happy and content like that. They eat a handful of big meals a day and that works for them.

Me, on the other hand, I need to eat all the time. I get very low blood sugar if I dont eat for more than a couple of hours at a time.


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## bigmac (May 11, 2016)

If I'm busy I can get buy with eating once a day (usually lunch). When I've bored I snack.


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## squeezablysoft (May 11, 2016)

Tad said:


> I don't know -- I almost always finish meals still hungry, and just have to use a mix of habit and willpower to stop eating. I don't really stop being hungry very often



*Me too, especially now because of the ppl I live with now. When I DO get to be full it's the most wonderful feeling though. I'm looking forward to getting that feeling (oh, autocorrect you're so funny, "feeding" indeed!) more often when I go to college. :eat2::eat1::eat2::eat1::eat2::eat1::eat2::eat1:*


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## squeezablysoft (May 11, 2016)

*Some days I can go most of the day and other times I start wilting every couple hours. The unpredictability just makes it more annoying.*


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## squeezablysoft (May 11, 2016)

Tad said:


> I don't know -- I almost always finish meals still hungry, and just have to use a mix of habit and willpower to stop eating. I don't really stop being hungry very often



*Do you ever have trouble falling asleep at night because you're hungry, even though you've supposedly had enough (or more than enough) calories for the day? I REALLY hate that. 
*


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## Teach (Jun 2, 2016)

I was wondering if I would be considered a BHM or not. I am right on the line between class II and class III obese, so I guess I do.


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