# Does the superfat sexual goddess the basis of male sexual imagery prevent the an



## katherine22 (Jun 21, 2009)

The idea of a strong (and real) woman here seems anathema to the pervasive need that so many here seem to have of fat femininity as at once infinitely pliable (soft, plush, giving) and so out-of-this-world larger-than-life that women becomes images "goddesses" to be forced into molds of perfection that no real woman can be comfortable in. In an atmosphere like this, I have seen how difficult it is to have real, adult, flowing conversations before someone stamps his foot and starts clamoring for the right to have the last word. It isn't that there aren't intelligent people here--there are. It's that the atmosphere is so oppressively charged with the one agenda of allowing the men to "worship" their "goddesses," that everything else is subsumed by that. I've never found being thought of as attractive so suffocating."




__________________


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Jun 21, 2009)

What I find suffocating is the idea that someone who finds me attractive is doing me a big favor and that, hence, I owe them something. 

If someone finds me attractive, then that should be an opening to get to know me.....not to collect something from me.


Also, feminist is a bad word around here sometimes, I notice.......




P.S. I am amused and really want to see where this goes......


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## StarWitness (Jun 21, 2009)

katherine22 said:


> It's that the atmosphere is so oppressively charged with the one agenda of allowing the men to "worship" their "goddesses," that everything else is subsumed by that. I've never found being thought of as attractive so suffocating."



The title got cut off! What was the end bit supposed to say? *curious*

I agree with you; I do get that vibe sometimes. However, I think it's a microcosmic reflection of our culture at large (pun not intended), where despite major strides in gender equality, many times a woman's visibility in society is still directly related to how sexually attractive (and available) she is to men.

Gender aside, any time that you're you're putting yourself at the mercy of someone else's desires is going to be suffocating, whether you're a politician who has to come up with policies that satisfy millions of people, a flight attendant who has to smile at every jet-lagged lout who gets on the plane, or a pay-site model who's going to lose customers if she doesn't maintain her attractiveness.


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## Tad (Jun 22, 2009)

It is interesting how different people perceive different sides of Dimensions. I'd not have thought of that particular viewpoint at all.

I suppose it comes down to what threads we each read, what PMs get sent our way, and how we interpret all of that.

I'm not saying that I don't see certain takes on women being demanded at times, just not the same that Katherine sees. (also I tend to roll my eyes and carry on, assuming that those demands will be widely ignored. Obviously that assumption is also not shared by everyone).


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## Captain Save (Jun 22, 2009)

I have noticed in my time here that there does seem to be an atmosphere of 'worship', for lack of a more accurate word. I have seen individuals post who zealously express admiration in somewhat coarse terms, and be confronted with disapproval by other posters who desire to promote an atmosphere of human decency, courtesy, and respect instead of crudity (one such poster was even told to take a cold shower.) Unsuprisingly, these admirers express their displeasure and confusion for being called out for their behavior. 

I have also noticed that the lack of respect led to the untimely demise of Hyde Park; in its wake we are left with the electronic equivalent of board games. Please don't misunderstand me; *I am not criticizing the lounge*. If civil intellectual discourse is to be had, however, it must be crafted from scratch, and not everyone is able to remain civil. I personally enjoy thought provoking discussions; thank you Katherine, for providing the opportunity to indulge in one.


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## Mies (Jun 22, 2009)

Please define "strong" and "real".


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## Russ2d (Jun 24, 2009)

> Also, feminist is a bad word around here sometimes, I notice.......



With good reason GEF


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## TraciJo67 (Jun 24, 2009)

Russ2d said:


> With good reason GEF



When men say this, there is never a good reason, Russ.


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## Asrai (Jun 24, 2009)

TraciJo67 said:


> When men say this, there is never a good reason, Russ.



Local feminists promote a "man tax" that men should pay extra because "we" rape and beat women.

I hate how they group me together with rapists and wifebeaters.


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Jun 24, 2009)

Russ2d said:


> With good reason GEF



Russ, from reading your posts here, it has always seemed to me that you look down upon and hate women. Not sure why you think that's a good thing though......

Do you tell your mother to know her place?


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## Fascinita (Jun 25, 2009)

Asrai said:


> Local feminists ...



Do you like pre-marital sex, by any chance?

If so, you can thank feminists for advocating female sexual agency, in large part.


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## msbard90 (Jul 2, 2009)

Green Eyed Fairy said:


> What I find suffocating is the idea that someone who finds me attractive is doing me a big favor and that, hence, I owe them something.
> 
> If someone finds me attractive, then that should be an opening to get to know me.....not to collect something from me.
> 
> ...



I definitely agree here... Thank you for the compliment, and no, I will not go out of my way for your special _needs_. Word^


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## rollhandler (Jul 2, 2009)

Over the years I have sought out and tried to have conversations such as the ones you mention and have been richly rewarded from time to time with conversations ranging from debate of political or social issues, to basic and frank discussions on a variety of topics from home remodel, car care, lawn care, child rearing, and relationships and sexuality.

These are the conversations I look for when chatting online with women as well as men. The problem "I" run into is that these types of convos are few and very far between. I have made invites, posted my yahoomessenger nickname in various places and shared my email publicly. I have also made known that I would never turn a good convo down and sought them out from time to time. Guys rarely want to talk to guys from this site for some reason and the women seem to have a problem if a guy is attached in any way with coming to him with wanting to shoot the bull. 

I understand that the women here have a hard time finding someone just to BS with without wading through the sea of rude crude and immature posts and I.M.s but have they really sought out actively the ones that do just want to have discussions on just about any topic without it degenerating into "show me your tits, how much weight do you want to gain, or post more pics please"

I have only about three people on a yahoo list that I seek out and are willing to pop in from time to time to chat for no reason but to alleviate boredom or just to catch up on whats been happening in each others worlds. The rest are family.These started out with a good conversation or two and quickly degenerated into discussions of sex. I am willing to discuss any topic openly and freely and debate many issues passionately but for all the women here griping about this being the only topic guys seem to want to discuss, why is it that when you finally get a guy that wants to have discussions about things not sexual we have trouble getting those conversations from the women? I don't mind discussing fat issues, sex, or just about anything else. In my world of conversation NO TOPIC IS TABOO but I like you enjoy a variety of topics and not just about sex, or how fat I like my women. These people on my yahoo list were not heard from after a couple of conversations, and any attempts from me to generate a further conversations were usually ignored.

I don't know what to tell you about your attempts to have active and engaging conversations other than just to keep looking and contact me sometime at [email protected] or on the Yahoo messenger at
Rollhandler2002 anytime I am on.
Rollhandler


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## superodalisque (Jul 2, 2009)

Asrai said:


> Local feminists promote a "man tax" that men should pay extra because "we" rape and beat women.
> 
> I hate how they group me together with rapists and wifebeaters.



i find it odd that when women ask for civility in the present in regards to a statement made to them at that particular moment that that man uses the excuse that she is a feminist to justify his crude behavior. when women bring thier displeasure to the fore its because something unpleasant is happening in the now and not because someone in the past may have been raped by some other man entirely.


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## superodalisque (Jul 2, 2009)

rollhandler said:


> Over the years I have sought out and tried to have conversations such as the ones you mention and have been richly rewarded from time to time with conversations ranging from debate of political or social issues, to basic and frank discussions on a variety of topics from home remodel, car care, lawn care, child rearing, and relationships and sexuality.
> 
> These are the conversations I look for when chatting online with women as well as men. The problem "I" run into is that these types of convos are few and very far between. I have made invites, posted my yahoomessenger nickname in various places and shared my email publicly. I have also made known that I would never turn a good convo down and sought them out from time to time. Guys rarely want to talk to guys from this site for some reason and the women seem to have a problem if a guy is attached in any way with coming to him with wanting to shoot the bull.
> 
> ...



i understand your problem. its the dims culture. everything is sexualized. if you are talking to a man on yahoo it MUST be sexual. some of my best friends on dims are men who are married or otherwise attached and its purely platonic and they have always been gentlemen. but there are also a lot of attached men here who cross the line all of the time so the women are very careful about who they deal with. many are with thin women and just come here to get thier rocks off. sorry to say that is not rare at all. i think those guys are most likely to fit into the mold Katherine was talking about because thier total focus is fantasyland. its much more rare to run into a guy who just wants to shoot the bull and talk politics etc...--which i love to do! the ladies here, like me for instance, just don't want to cause an issue in someone's marriage or relationship which can happen if you are definitely someone's physical type and they find out they like you too. the grass always seems to be greener when the other yard doesn't seem to come with children , inlaws and bills. no one wants to be put in the position of having to tell a friend to bug off.


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## kayrae (Jul 3, 2009)

As a feminist who was raped and beaten up by men, I find your comment to be highly offensive. Especially because I promote equality for both men and women. Go be mad at the men who are beating up and raping women. Ugh. 



Asrai said:


> Local feminists promote a "man tax" that men should pay extra because "we" rape and beat women.
> 
> I hate how they group me together with rapists and wifebeaters.


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## Qadira (Jul 3, 2009)

I've fairly recently been introduced to the Dimensions site. I agree there can be sexually charge posts and conversations.

I don't see anything wrong with that. If those are the conversations a person is interested in pursuing there is no shortage of opportunity.

It seems that there are other issues at work here. It's gone from commenting on a desire for a wider variety of topics to a mini battle of the sexes. Emotional responses to Feminism and chauvenism(sp) have over taken what I thought was a fairly innocent comment. I could easily be over simplifying.

I personally haven't found a consistent situation where I had access to people who are physically attracted to me. I've been exploring a lot of the boards related specifically to gaining, attraction, sexuality, and experiences. 

I think sometimes conversations between individuals wind up in a sexual area is because sex is a common topic that almost everyone has in common. From pure vanilla to the tastier of the 32 flavors, we've all had some experiences, good, bad, and other wise.

Politics, art, economy, society, law. The list is endless of what we can talk about, but it puts us out there. Especially in one on one situations. If someone isn't into what we're into sexually there's other fish in the sea, but if someone gets to know us and rejects us for something that may actually be closer to our hearts it's all together different.

I am honored in the areas here I have explored that people are willing to share their experiences. I don't have to agree to acknowledge. I don't have to comment to have shared a piece of what they've shared.

I'm grateful at the end of the day for all conversations no matter the topic.


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## Paquito (Jul 3, 2009)

Asrai said:


> Local feminists promote a "man tax" that men should pay extra because "we" rape and beat women.
> 
> I hate how they group me together with rapists and wifebeaters.




Maybe we should redirect that hate to those members of our gender who do rape and beat women.

If it takes a "man tax" to actually raise awareness about these travesties, then so be it. Perhaps it would lead people to be more proactive in this cause.

(Please don't kill me for using this analogy) In a way, it's like that proposition that overweight consumers be banned from eateries in Missouri (?). Was it going to pass? No. But the only reason it was introduced was to raise awareness.

(Again, I am not comparing obesity to rape and murder. They are not equal in any way, shape of form. Only using the analogy because it's the one I could think of at 5AM. End of Disclaimer.)


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## LordSheogorath (Jul 18, 2009)

katherine22 said:


> The idea of a strong (and real) woman here seems anathema to the pervasive need that so many here seem to have of fat femininity as at once infinitely pliable (soft, plush, giving) and so out-of-this-world larger-than-life that women becomes images "goddesses" to be forced into molds of perfection that no real woman can be comfortable in. In an atmosphere like this, I have seen how difficult it is to have real, adult, flowing conversations before someone stamps his foot and starts clamoring for the right to have the last word. It isn't that there aren't intelligent people here--there are. It's that the atmosphere is so oppressively charged with the one agenda of allowing the men to "worship" their "goddesses," that everything else is subsumed by that. I've never found being thought of as attractive so suffocating."
> 
> 
> 
> ...




Lol. I'm not that intelligent so I won't beat around the bush with fancy words. I love thick women. I adore them. But I do not worship any person lol. And matter of fact the only reason I subscribed to this forums is the fact that there are a lot of like minded people (people who are attracted to larger persons). The only time I will usually express my attraction is generally in the pay-sites section where the women there post pictures to be viewed and it's usually something along the lines of, "Wow nice butt." I don't even comment very often as I'm only on here once in a blue moon.

I think the population you are speaking of exist in every preference whether the women be large or small. It's just something some guys do- I'm not sure why as I myself do not do this. 

I like coming on here to see all opinions and ideas of discussion and I certainly don't come on here to have debates and argue and I could care less about having the last word in an online discussion.

Many of the women on this forum tend to be strong and independent opinionated individuals and I do not see this sort of behavior as being prevalent between the thicker women and their admirers. The first thought that came to my head when I read the original post was, "That's rather rude." I'm not sure how the heck y'all have carried this into rape and beating and feminism and all that junk...

Maybe everyone just ought cool their jets and take this forum for what it is.

On a personal level. I'm about to go pick up my curvy lil' asian girlfriend and I'm excited as all hell it's the weekend. Which movie you guys think is better- Up? Or Hangover? 

:bow:


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## KHayes666 (Jul 18, 2009)

LordSheogorath said:


> Lol. I'm not that intelligent so I won't beat around the bush with fancy words. I love thick women. I adore them. But I do not worship any person lol. And matter of fact the only reason I subscribed to this forums is the fact that there are a lot of like minded people (people who are attracted to larger persons). The only time I will usually express my attraction is generally in the pay-sites section where the women there post pictures to be viewed and it's usually something along the lines of, "Wow nice butt." I don't even comment very often as I'm only on here once in a blue moon.
> 
> I think the population you are speaking of exist in every preference whether the women be large or small. It's just something some guys do- I'm not sure why as I myself do not do this.
> 
> ...



I'm not even going to touch this subject because I can't begin to imagine the horror of rape and brutality so I'll never know the hatred that stems from that. However, all I can say is not all men are abusive.....and I'm starting to get tired of all these threads that poke holes into the male gender. 

Anyone who's read Why We Suck will know that both men AND women suck for their very own separate reasons....so stop the male bashing and the female bashing and do something like..oh I don't know...ACCEPT one another. That's what the site's supposed to be about right?

Now on a lighter note: Hangover! Everyone I know from the guys at work to my pick up football buddies say the movie is the shit. Do yourself a favor dude and see Hangover....it'll be great.


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## fffff (Jul 18, 2009)

rollhandler said:


> .
> 
> I don't know what to tell you about your attempts to have active and engaging conversations other than just to keep looking and contact me sometime at [email protected] or on the Yahoo messenger at
> Rollhandler2002 anytime I am on.
> Rollhandler




Maybe this has something to do with the fact that the name you use is _rollhandler_. You can't have a blatantly sexual screen name and be surprised when no one wants to contact you to just talk.


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## mossystate (Jul 18, 2009)

fffff said:


> Maybe this has something to do with the fact that the name you use is _rollhandler_. You can't have a blatantly sexual screen name and be surprised when no one wants to contact you to just talk.



We have a winner.


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## superodalisque (Jul 18, 2009)

katherine22 said:


> The idea of a strong (and real) woman here seems anathema to the pervasive need that so many here seem to have of fat femininity as at once infinitely pliable (soft, plush, giving) and so out-of-this-world larger-than-life that women becomes images "goddesses" to be forced into molds of perfection that no real woman can be comfortable in. In an atmosphere like this, I have seen how difficult it is to have real, adult, flowing conversations before someone stamps his foot and starts clamoring for the right to have the last word. It isn't that there aren't intelligent people here--there are. It's that the atmosphere is so oppressively charged with the one agenda of allowing the men to "worship" their "goddesses," that everything else is subsumed by that. I've never found being thought of as attractive so suffocating."
> 
> 
> __________________



i'm of two minds on this. i agree with you that other people's expectations of you can be oppressive. but, i think its perfectly fine for people to have fantasies and also to idealize and even worship the female form if they want though. what i do have a problem with is the belief that some admirers might have that they have the right to force those ideals onto other people. i personally don't find the idealization oppressive, just as i don't find the idealizaton of thinner women oppressive. they are not me. they are beautiful in their own right just as i am. and i don't take their idealization as antithetical to my own beauty or value. if i fall outside of someone's norm or preference i don't automatically take it as somehow diminishing me. i think you have to want to make that leap in order to take it. if someone says they like chinese people i don't assume they mean they hate black people when saying so. if i did that would mean there was something inside me that wanted to believe that. and even if that was what they meant it wouldn't diminish the pride or confidence i have in myself as to my own value because i KNOW who i am.

i think the real problem begins when women begin taking the opinions of others relating to thier desireability too seriously, especially on this level. dims is all about male fantasy. thats how it began. i don't think it deserves demonizing. but it is very good to talk about these feelings because it will help guys to understand the difference between the fantasy woman and the real women who have all kinds of opinions. 

i love my body and i like to be appreciated. but it also bothers me when other women go to what might be seen to be the far extreme and see that as a bad thing and try you make me feel guilty for enjoying myself as a woman. not everything is an attack on a woman's power. and sometimes even if it once was it may have developed into something else by now. i have the right to see myself in anyway i like. thats also feminism. it doesn't matter who is trying to take your power away to decide who you are--be they male or female. there is no difference between oppressions, whether they are administered by a person of the same sex or a different one. sometimes i choose to be a goddess. some days i chose to be an intellectual. on my best days i'm both. i enjoy all of that. i'm not afraid to be idealized because beneath it all i believe i deserve worship. i think that all people are godlike and have a bit of the divine in them and deserve appreciation and homage not only for the things that people can see but for all of the other layers we possess as well. but i really don't waste a whole lot of time worrying about whether other people hate what i look like or love what i look like. in the end the only thing thats important is how i admire and value myself and not making other people feel as though they should love themselves less for some reason. the other stuff though nice in some ways is ephemeral. anyway, in the end we have to stop looking at ourselves totally through the eyes of another and giving that so much credence that we can't enjoy what there is in life to be enjoyed.

i can understand how you feel. but in the end maybe it shouldn't be so important what a few people on a site say. how do YOU feel when you look in the mirror? can you admire yourself without any input from others? those might be the only important questions that you really must ask. then you take your power back and it doesn't matter what other people say or don't say.


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## superodalisque (Jul 18, 2009)

fffff said:


> Maybe this has something to do with the fact that the name you use is _rollhandler_. You can't have a blatantly sexual screen name and be surprised when no one wants to contact you to just talk.



yep, she definitely has a point there. you might want to rethink what kind of message your sending with your screen name. until i read some of your posts i had the distinct impression that you were probably not someone who'd like to talk about substantive stuff .


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Jul 18, 2009)

superodalisque said:


> yep, she definitely has a point there. you might want to rethink what kind of message your sending with your screen name. until i read some of your posts i had the distinct impression that you were probably not someone who'd like to talk about substantive stuff .



Yes, I like him much better after reading some of his posts and becoming familiar with him. Otherwise...I would have just taken him for a "looker" on here.


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## wolfpersona (Jul 18, 2009)

katherine22 said:


> The idea of a strong (and real) woman here seems anathema to the pervasive need that so many here seem to have of fat femininity as at once infinitely pliable (soft, plush, giving) and so out-of-this-world larger-than-life that women becomes images "goddesses" to be forced into molds of perfection that no real woman can be comfortable in. In an atmosphere like this, I have seen how difficult it is to have real, adult, flowing conversations before someone stamps his foot and starts clamoring for the right to have the last word. It isn't that there aren't intelligent people here--there are. It's that the atmosphere is so oppressively charged with the one agenda of allowing the men to "worship" their "goddesses," that everything else is subsumed by that. I've never found being thought of as attractive so suffocating."
> 
> 
> 
> ...



I find bigger women attractive. But I don't expect anyone to be perfect. We all have imperfections. Sure if I had a bodacious beutiful woman it would drive me crazy. I'm a man. Its my nature. If a woman looked good, on the aproppriate thread I'd say it. I'm sure women have their Ideals of good looking men as well but they aren't too open about them.
And note the two main sub forums under the board are *erotic weight gain* and *fat sexuality*. If you post a reavealing picture you're well aware of the coments that will follow. I notice *the Lounge *has a different attmosphere. Maybe because the topics are other than fat admiration.


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## Fascinita (Jul 19, 2009)

Green Eyed Fairy said:


> Yes, I like him much better after reading some of his posts and becoming familiar with him. Otherwise...I would have just taken him for a "looker" on here.



I agree. Rollhandler is cool. I enjoy reading his posts.


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## rollhandler (Jul 19, 2009)

fffff said:


> Maybe this has something to do with the fact that the name you use is _rollhandler_. You can't have a blatantly sexual screen name and be surprised when no one wants to contact you to just talk.



When I chose the name Rollhandler I tried for over a half an hour to find one that was descriptive of myself finding all my name ideas already taken and this was long before I was active in the dimensions world. The need for a new name came about from a computer glitch and a futile attempt to change a password. My prior screenname was Vinylmaster which refered to my hobby as an audiophile and my collection of record albums which at the time ranged into the thousands. I didnt realize the double entendre until everyone I spoke to thought I was into BD/SM

Of course on a site like this nobody would think that for over 6 years Rollhandler was my occupational title, handling rolled paper with a specially forklift for a printing company....... oh well after 6 yrs I decided that since everyone knew me by that name that it might be worth keeping. 

It drives me crazy when people constantly give me new email addys, phone numbers, and screennames to try to remember on a regular basis. Since it bothers me when this happens I choose to maintain this name as long as it is associated with me for good or ill. It has an accidental double entendre which fits my personality and describes my preference in females as well. Sorry if anyone got the wrong idea about it. This is the first time in close to 10 years of being Rollhandler that anyone has mentioned that it may have any kind of negative affect on my online relations in any way. My reputation should speak for itself both in chat and on these forums.

It never ceases to amaze me that with all the screennames I've managed to have over the years every one has been misinterpreted, and all have had to do with hobbies or work.
I had no intention to rant and hope this doesn't derail the thread, it is not my intent.
Thank you to those who took the time and effort to stand up on my behalf here, and shame on those who judged the value of the book by its title.
Rollhandler


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## TraciJo67 (Jul 19, 2009)

rollhandler said:


> Of course on a site like this nobody would think that for over 6 years it was my occupation, handling rolled paper with a specially forklift for a printing company....... oh well after 6 yrs I decided that since everyone knew me by that name that it might be worth keeping.
> 
> It never ceases to amaze me that with all the screennames I've managed to have over the years every one has been misunderstood, and all have had to do with hobbies or work.
> Rollhandler



... and that is the only reason that you chose Rollhandler as your Dims screen name? :doh:


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## mossystate (Jul 19, 2009)

I have to say, when I first started chatting ( in chat ), I thought the name was about handling fat, as that's kind of all you used to talk about...fat rolls...fat rolls... *shrugs *...might be understandable that others thought the same. You had to know ...etc..


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## Paquito (Jul 19, 2009)

And here I assumed that he was a baker of some sort.


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## TraciJo67 (Jul 19, 2009)

rollhandler said:


> shame on those who judged the value of the book by its title.
> Rollhandler



Own it, man. Just ... own it.


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## rollhandler (Jul 19, 2009)

TraciJo67 said:


> ... and that is the only reason that you chose Rollhandler as your Dims screen name? :doh:



After I spent a half an hour seeing screenname taken, I tried Rollhandler and it went through, the double entendre was accidental since I wasnt chatting in Dims at that time yet . Once I found a screenname that worked I used it across the board for simplicity sake. I went back to all the sites I was Vinylmaster at and changed the names and reworked all the profiles. It is the screenname I use everywhere for all occasions with only one exception. 

I gained a hard won reputation as a chatter using this name over many years and have posted over the years on various Bullitin boards, fat chats and forums under this name. A very large quantity of chatters know who Rollhandler is by name or reputation. When I lost internet access for an extended period the name was pruned from dims. I fought ferociously to get that name back so that nobody else could take it and be mistaken for me, possibly doing harm to a reputation I spent years working at keeping respectable. I am as proud of my screenname and the reputation it has as I am being an FA. I appeal to those who state that a person should look beyond the package to the person inside, I feel that judging a person by their screenname should also be avoided. There is an honest to goodness flesh and blood person that that name is attached to and even as someone nicknamed pervertjim can be a nice guy someone nicknamed niceguytobbws can be a cad as well. 
Anyway I've used space in a thread long enough off topic. Please direct any further inquiry to a PM here in the forums or to my email please and let the thread carry on.
Rollhandler


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## KHayes666 (Jul 19, 2009)

rollhandler said:


> After I spent a half an hour seeing screenname taken, I tried Rollhandler and it went through, the double entendre was accidental since I wasnt chatting in Dims at that time yet . Once I found a screenname that worked I used it across the board for simplicity sake. I went back to all the sites I was Vinylmaster at and changed the names and reworked all the profiles. It is the screenname I use everywhere for all occasions with only one exception.
> 
> I gained a hard won reputation as a chatter using this name over many years and have posted over the years on various Bullitin boards, fat chats and forums under this name. A very large quantity of chatters know who Rollhandler is by name or reputation. When I lost internet access for an extended period the name was pruned from dims. I fought ferociously to get that name back so that nobody else could take it and be mistaken for me, possibly doing harm to a reputation I spent years working at keeping respectable. I am as proud of my screenname and the reputation it has as I am being an FA. I appeal to those who state that a person should look beyond the package to the person inside, I feel that judging a person by their screenname should also be avoided. There is an honest to goodness flesh and blood person that that name is attached to and even as someone nicknamed pervertjim can be a nice guy someone nicknamed niceguytobbws can be a cad as well.
> Anyway I've used space in a thread long enough off topic. Please direct any further inquiry to a PM here in the forums or to my email please and let the thread carry on.
> Rollhandler



Dude, forget them......nothing but negativity....move on to a different thread and enjoy yourself


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## TraciJo67 (Jul 19, 2009)

KHayes666 said:


> Dude, forget them......nothing but negativity....move on to a different thread and enjoy yourself



Kevin, dear ... are you a moderator now? 

Rollhandler ... I wasn't questioning your ability to write thought-provoking and reasoned posts. Nor actually judging that you chose "Rollhandler" as your screen name. More just questioning why it seemed that now you wanted to distance yourself from any connotation associated with it. Made me laugh, actually .. because you seem a person who very much wants to be taken seriously, and find yourself in a quandry because people are judging your screen name. I think that lots of people here can identify with being pigeon-holed, it's just usually for a reason beyond their control, whether that be sex, age, body type, orientation, etc.


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## BarbBBW (Jul 19, 2009)

why are people in this thread,..pointing fingers at other people?!!? This always pisses me off. Its a topic,.. an in general topic. Doesnt mean you start picking someone out and jumping on him verbally. Rollhandler is a great guy, always polite and kind to all. He is an FA and he does like rolls on a woman, but it also seemed to match his career as well,.. so thats his name!! Its his name, He chose and he shouldnt be judge for it.
I should have put my name as *"Barbisafatwomanwholovesmenandsexnandflirtwithwomanaswellandisapicturewhorealong withbeingacompleteonlineslutbutiamanicepersontrustme"*
discuss the *topic*, not someone who is giving his opinion or trying to let others know he does enjoy conversation, as a human being. Dont be so fast to JUDGE!


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## fffff (Jul 19, 2009)

I'm gonna change my sn to TheAssWrangler....... 'Cause my family owns a ranch with donkeys. Now who wants to chat about the weather? 




> Politics, art, economy, society, law. The list is endless of what we can talk about, but it puts us out there.



To beat a different dead horse, I'd like to point out that we in fact cannot talk about politics, economy, society, or law here unless it is somehow directly related to fat. 
When hyde park was deleted we were told the reason for this board's existence was so that fat woman could marvel in male attention. It's a male-centric atmosphere because that's what it was always intended to be.


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Jul 19, 2009)

Since we are off on a tangent about misunderstood screen names....I go by originalfairyqueen in chess. Some guys got mad at me and decided that name inferred that I'm really a man. They say READ IT...JUST READ THAT NAME! It HAS to be a man....:blink: :doh:


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## kayrae (Jul 19, 2009)

GEF, that just cracks me up. 

Rollhandler, I like you. I've read your others posts and appreciate your thoughts; however, I'm not going to lie. When I first noticed your screen name, I also made assumptions about who you're about. I changed my mind because obviously I haven't run across any commentary from you that's equivalent to, "eheheh... insert stereotypical creepiness here." Let's face it... first impressions do matter. I'm not about to take pervertjim seriously, especially when my PM box gets filled up with unwanted lascivious messages. 

ANYWAY, BACK TO THE OP's TOPIC...

Katherine22, the Goddess worship that you've noticed is not something that I previously detected. I'm not saying that it doesn't exist because other Dimensions women that I know in real life have brought up this topic before. I guess it really depends on what part of the forum you choose to read. I stay away from the library because I just can't get into it. The paysite board doesn't really cater to my sexual interest, so I don't really click on the threads or read any of the commentary there either. 

Personally I don't feel suffocated by the Goddess worship. I feel suffocated by the constant threads that idealize and celebrate the self-confident fat woman as the only real BBW. I consider myself confident, but sometimes my confidence is chipped away when I get treated like trash because I'm fat.


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## mossystate (Jul 19, 2009)

BarbBBW said:


> why are people in this thread,..pointing fingers at other people?!!? This always pisses me off. Its a topic,.. an in general topic. Doesnt mean you start picking someone out and jumping on him verbally. Rollhandler is a great guy, always polite and kind to all. He is an FA and he does like rolls on a woman, but it also seemed to match his career as well,.. so thats his name!! Its his name, He chose and he shouldnt be judge for it.
> I should have put my name as *"Barbisafatwomanwholovesmenandsexnandflirtwithwomanaswellandisapicturewhorealong withbeingacompleteonlineslutbutiamanicepersontrustme"*
> discuss the *topic*, not someone who is giving his opinion or trying to let others know he does enjoy conversation, as a human being. Dont be so fast to JUDGE!





You know what Barb... enough. Rollhandler brought up the irritation of not being able to find certain kinds of conversation. Fact is, like I said, when I was new in chat, I very much remember him always going on about how he likes to handle rolls...as in fat rolls. I remember, way back when, getting tired of the double entendre. I remember the private messages that were just about the fat rolls. If you had been around chat back then, you would have been giggling the whole time. Good for you. Really. Just stop with your own scolding of women who are not so needy/wanting of any male attention, no matter what it is, as long as it smells like a ' compliment '. Try really hard to understand how some experiences are not going to match up with yours, or are not what is sought by all others. You don't seem to want to give me a nod over what I...me...I experienced. I find that interesting...and very telling. I was addressing this issue that he brought up. Women do get to respond, and it ain't always gonna be with a giggle. Please learn to deal with that.


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## TraciJo67 (Jul 19, 2009)

mossystate said:


> Women do get to respond, and it ain't always gonna be with a giggle. Please learn to deal with that.



Thank you.

I was struggling to find a way to respond and to convey ... exactly that. Only it would have taken me 1000 more words, and going 'round 'n 'round in circles to get exactly to what you said above in two brief sentences.

This.

Very much this.


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## superodalisque (Jul 19, 2009)

KHayes666 said:


> Dude, forget them......nothing but negativity....move on to a different thread and enjoy yourself



*sigh* this is what we get for trying to offer some constructive help and say honestly why roll may get the reaction he does. i'm not generally overly sensitive about things and even i wasn't so sure of him with that screen name. but if no one wants to hear what we have to say thats okay too. they can go on making the same mistakes even when thier friends try to help them to understand what might be happening. we were just trying to tell the dude what it looks like to people who might not know him. if you want to know the truth as we see it and we tell you it doesn't seem right to get defensive about it. i understand it might not be intentional but it certainly looks intentional and i have to say when roll was in chat before early on he did make body comments that seemed to underscore the fact that the rolls were what he was all about. i have even had guys comment that they would never have the name like rollhandler specifically(yes i asked another guy in chat what he thought of it way before this convo came up) because the connotation was not good at all. so i don't think we are completely off base here even if it could have been put in a more charitable way at times. but sometimes in order for people to really hear you you have to be blunt--unless they don't really care what you think anyway. this is not just one woman's opinion we are talking about. its coming from people who are even often on opposite sides of an issue, but here it seems to be lining up the same way for most of the women. what does that tell you?

when people do you the favor of trying to tell you the truth you should actually try and listen.


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## BarbBBW (Jul 19, 2009)

mossystate said:


> You know what Barb... enough. Rollhandler brought up the irritation of not being able to find certain kinds of conversation. Fact is, like I said, when I was new in chat, I very much remember him always going on about how he likes to handle rolls...as in fat rolls. I remember, way back when, getting tired of the double entendre. I remember the private messages that were just about the fat rolls. If you had been around chat back then, you would have been giggling the whole time. Good for you. Really. Just stop with your own scolding of women who are not so needy/wanting of any male attention, no matter what it is, as long as it smells like a ' compliment '. Try really hard to understand how some experiences are not going to match up with yours, or are not what is sought by all others. You don't seem to want to give me a nod over what I...me...I experienced. I find that interesting...and very telling. I was addressing this issue that he brought up. Women do get to respond, and it ain't always gonna be with a giggle. Please learn to deal with that.



nothing was aimed at you ,... when there is a thread ,.. what i said is discuss the topic,.. not the peoples screen names. But good try on all the other BS you had to say!


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## TraciJo67 (Jul 19, 2009)

BarbBBW said:


> nothing was aimed at you ,... when there is a thread ,.. what i said is discuss the topic,.. not the peoples screen names. But good try on all the other BS you had to say!



You mean, don't barge into serious threads and start openly flirting coquettishly with someone? Would that be considered veering off-topic? Barb, if you're going to preach the importance of staying on topic, I think you'd better <clean up in aisle 6> first.


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## mossystate (Jul 19, 2009)

BarbBBW said:


> nothing was aimed at you ,... when there is a thread ,.. what i said is discuss the topic,.. not the peoples screen names. But good try on all the other BS you had to say!



I guess you did not read where_ Rollhandler_ brought up the issue of his screen name, and how it was affecting his communications? I guess you just picked through the words you thought were about ' bashing '? The topic he brought up...him...not me...not anybody else, as far as I can tell, and I will go back and check. Why not take him to task for bringing up a topic that was not strictly about the original topic? Why is it you did not do that. I wonder.

Do you ever go off-topic, like Rollhandler...and then, in responding to his off-topic ponderings, the rest of us.


Ah, my BS...aka...my experiences. Nice, Barb.

*eta....I do want to say something, before those folks who scream ' jealous ', come in to rescue. I am actually really tired how sometimes, women are taken to task for being attention whores, but the men who encourage and coax, well, they get to sit back and enjoy, and not have the critics of the women on their asses for being part of what they find to be a problem. Oh, and the critics are not always women, but it is always the women who get called jealous. I have heard, " well, men are gonna do that, encourage women to post pics of their tits, etc, that's what guys do...I won't bash him for that, as I have a ripe target in the woman ". Yup...I actually want to see both sides treated the same. So, now those who want to say I am jealous over something...what that is, I still don't know...come on over, red rover.


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## BarbBBW (Jul 19, 2009)

i am not arguing here with any of you, i know you guys love to argue with me, cause I am who I am , but its not going to happen.


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## mossystate (Jul 19, 2009)

BarbBBW said:


> i am not arguing here with any of you, i know you guys love to argue with me, cause I am who I am , but its not going to happen.



Well, enjoy the sexy compliments, as you throw lots of women under the bus. But then, our personal experiences are shit, compared to someone who is gonna tell you you are hot. Cool.


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## BarbBBW (Jul 19, 2009)

mossystate said:


> Well, enjoy the sexy compliments, as you throw lots of women under the bus. But then, our personal experiences are shit, compared to someone who is gonna tell you you are hot. Cool.


I would never say anything about someone else's experiences, especially judge them for it. You obviously have no idea of the kind of person I am, and I dont expect you to care. I stand up for alot of men, BBW, and regular women on this board and In my everyday life. I want women to be the best they can me mentallly, physically, and emotionally. 
So say whatever you would like, that I flirt with men, (true) I need attention(true) , i need praise(true) I am overtly sexual in responses (true) whatever. I am who I am , but i NEVER EVER get what I want or need by putting other people down!! I respect all people at all times. I dont always agree, but I would never throw anyone "under a bus".


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## mossystate (Jul 19, 2009)

BarbBBW said:


> ... but i NEVER EVER get what I want or need by putting other people down!! I respect all people at all times. I dont always agree, but I would never throw anyone "under a bus".



The person in question was not being ' put down '. He was getting feedback...and, dare I say ( again ), the experinces of others, directly related to what he put out, for all to read. Something is not connecting for you. I have been very clear. You say you respect people at all times, except, I guess, when they have told you their personal experiences with another...and you call it bullshit. We obviously own different dictionaries.


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Jul 19, 2009)

This thread is making me want to handle some rolls......


Oh wait....I thought we were still over in the cock thread....my bad :doh: :blush:


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## BarbBBW (Jul 19, 2009)

mossystate said:


> You know what Barb... enough. Rollhandler brought up the irritation of not being able to find certain kinds of conversation. Fact is, like I said, when I was new in chat, I very much remember him always going on about how he likes to handle rolls...as in fat rolls. I remember, way back when, getting tired of the double entendre. I remember the private messages that were just about the fat rolls. If you had been around chat back then, you would have been giggling the whole time. Good for you. Really. * Just stop with your own scolding of women who are not so needy/wanting of any male attention, no matter what it is, as long as it smells like a ' compliment '. Try really hard to understand how some experiences are not going to match up with yours, or are not what is sought by all others.* You don't seem to want to give me a nod over what I...me...I experienced. I find that interesting...and very telling. I was addressing this issue that he brought up. Women do get to respond, and it ain't always gonna be with a giggle. Please learn to deal with that.



this is the BS i was referring too. Not your experiences !! Are we done with this yet please?


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## mossystate (Jul 19, 2009)

BarbBBW said:


> this is the BS i was referring too. Not your experiences !! Are we done with this yet please?



Until you once again scold women who are voicing their experiences that have everything to do with something said...yes. It's not fun when the handled talk back. Until next time.


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## Paquito (Jul 19, 2009)

Green Eyed Fairy said:


> This thread is making me want to handle some rolls......
> 
> 
> Oh wait....I thought we were still over in the cock thread....my bad :doh: :blush:



What we need is a ratemyrolls.com


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## Amarillowave (Jul 22, 2009)

While I love my BBW wife deeply, and admittedly get turned on by large women, I don't think I "worship" her or anyone else but the Supreme Being.

My feeling about the topic of being an FA is that BBW's represent an extreme of human femininity and sexuality. The wonderfully large breasts and bottoms most BBW's possess are just amplified versions of the feminine norm. That is, they seem, in men's eyes(at least FA's eyes) as being highly desirable for mating because the more feminine a women is, the more likely they are to produce offspring, which is the basis of human sexual attraction. 

I've also felt there was at least one other semi-conscious reason I am so attracted to large women. A women who is willing to indulge herself and experience the sensual pleasure of eating enough that she becomes fat would be likely to indulge in other sensual things, like a passionate relationship with a member of the opposite sex. I realize that's essentially a fantasy, but it works for me. My wife doesn't mind-it helps our sex life!


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## mossystate (Jul 22, 2009)

Amarillowave said:


> > While I love my BBW wife deeply, and admittedly get turned on by large women, I don't think I "worship" her or anyone else but the Supreme Being.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


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## mediaboy (Jul 31, 2009)

katherine22 said:


> The idea of a strong (and real) woman here seems anathema to the pervasive need that so many here seem to have of fat femininity as at once infinitely pliable (soft, plush, giving) and so out-of-this-world larger-than-life that women becomes images "goddesses" to be forced into molds of perfection that no real woman can be comfortable in. In an atmosphere like this, I have seen how difficult it is to have real, adult, flowing conversations before someone stamps his foot and starts clamoring for the right to have the last word. It isn't that there aren't intelligent people here--there are. It's that the atmosphere is so oppressively charged with the one agenda of allowing the men to "worship" their "goddesses," that everything else is subsumed by that. I've never found being thought of as attractive so suffocating."
> 
> 
> __________________



Yes.

This board is about many thing but as Conrad himself has said, "This board is an FA board for FA's and the women that want to be pursued by them".

I'm paraphrasing, maybe even putting a few extra words in his mouth but my understanding and experience with Dim's has essentially been that it is a place where men come to chase women whom they find attractive and women come to be chased. This is the standard norm with little variance outside of the GLTB forum in which case it is only changed in the most vouchsafe and tiniest way.

We are a collection of posters, a community of individuals with tits and asses and dicks and generally that is what we like most about one another.

Take your photos down, only respond to posts that are about things, not people. See how many friends you make and how quickly your little trickle of reputation dries up.

We want to relate to one another, we want to know one another, we want to fuck one another. This is the human condition. I seek companionship above all. My mind searches for it in every conversation, every thread. I read posts but do not really read them, I scan for people I know in the thread and give a shout out or agree uniformly in an attempt to draw myself closer to them, to engage them. It is ridiculous but it is what I do, it's what we all do.

In all honestly, if it weren't so. If this forum were more austere I wouldn't have it. If I wanted to argue fat politics I can do plenty of that with most jerks on the street. No, I come here for the fat politics and then something a little more, the community. The same community of strange men and women who against all convention, against all ridicule and prejudice, unabashedly celebrate their lives, themselves, and one another in this place, on Dim's.

So if it should transpire that during the course of a thread about something as intellectual as "Do women really like the taste of semen?" the threads conversation should suddenly go from discussing semen to _who_ wants to taste _my_ semen; I'll deal with it, it's worth it. You beautiful bastards, you're fucking worth it.


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## rollhandler (Aug 1, 2009)

BarbBBW said:


> why are people in this thread,..pointing fingers at other people?!!? This always pisses me off. Its a topic,.. an in general topic. Doesnt mean you start picking someone out and jumping on him verbally. Rollhandler is a great guy, always polite and kind to all. He is an FA and he does like rolls on a woman, but it also seemed to match his career as well,.. so thats his name!! Its his name, He chose and he shouldnt be judge for it.
> I should have put my name as *"Barbisafatwomanwholovesmenandsexnandflirtwithwomanaswellandisapicturewhorealong withbeingacompleteonlineslutbutiamanicepersontrustme"*
> discuss the *topic*, not someone who is giving his opinion or trying to let others know he does enjoy conversation, as a human being. Dont be so fast to JUDGE!



I don't know how to multi quote so i will quote this one and thank all en masse who stood in defense of my sn, its reputation, and the person behind the keyboard. The gripe I had here was only that I find out now 10 years after I chose it and worked hard to gain the rep I have that the reason I may be having trouble being taken seriously as a person has to do with the very name that I defend the reputation of. I honestly had no idea. 

I have always thought that the reputation and longevity on a site would carry more clout. I understand the double entendre that the name carries however I never viewed it as anything directly sexual but more cute or humorous. Now that I do understand that it is being viewed in that context I still stand behind the name but now with the understanding that some will need to get to know me much longer to understand that the person behind the name has more respectful intent than the name implies.

Thanks
Rollhandler


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## Fascinita (Aug 2, 2009)

Really? Let's scrutinize men exclusively a while--their bodies and sexuality, mostly--and take it easy on the girls. See how quickly the community disbands.

I don't think your argument holds. There are ways of relating and finding community that are not austere and yet do not hinge on constant one-directional scrutiny of women's bodies and sexuality. And have you seen how upset some people get when some women make it evident that they have stuff on their minds beyond "Look at my sexy weight gain!"? I think this dynamic is maybe what the OP has been referring to? 

If you're saying we shouldn't question it because what you find here is enough for you... well, that strikes me as a little myopic. Can we have a community of one?



mediaboy said:


> Yes.
> 
> This board is about many thing but as Conrad himself has said, "This board is an FA board for FA's and the women that want to be pursued by them".
> 
> ...


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## BarbBBW (Aug 2, 2009)

rollhandler said:


> I don't know how to multi quote so i will quote this one and thank all en masse who stood in defense of my sn, its reputation, and the person behind the keyboard. The gripe I had here was only that I find out now 10 years after I chose it and worked hard to gain the rep I have that the reason I may be having trouble being taken seriously as a person has to do with the very name that I defend the reputation of. I honestly had no idea.
> 
> I have always thought that the reputation and longevity on a site would carry more clout. I understand the double entendre that the name carries however I never viewed it as anything directly sexual but more cute or humorous. Now that I do understand that it is being viewed in that context I still stand behind the name but now with the understanding that some will need to get to know me much longer to understand that the person behind the name has more respectful intent than the name implies.
> 
> ...



anytime babe!!! anytime


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## tonynyc (Aug 2, 2009)

Fascinita said:


> Really? Let's scrutinize men exclusively a while--their bodies and sexuality, mostly--and take it easy on the girls. See how quickly the community disbands.
> 
> I don't think your argument holds. There are ways of relating and finding community that are not austere and yet do not hinge on constant one-directional scrutiny of women's bodies and sexuality. And have you seen how upset some people get when some women make it evident that they have stuff on their minds beyond "Look at my sexy weight gain!"? I think this dynamic is maybe what the OP has been referring to?
> 
> If you're saying we shouldn't question it because what you find here is enough for you... well, that strikes me as a little myopic. Can we have a community of one?



Hi Fascinita: I would comment-but, the Ass is distracting me


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## BarbBBW (Aug 2, 2009)

tonynyc said:


> Hi Fascinita: I would comment-but, the Ass is distracting me



it is very distracting i can not get my eyes off of it LMAO


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## Fascinita (Aug 2, 2009)

tonynyc said:


> Hi Fascinita: I would comment-but, the Ass is distracting me



No excuses, Tony!


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## tonynyc (Aug 2, 2009)

Fascinita said:


> No excuses, Tony!



So true - please bear with me. I'll make it short as it is late. I would write more;but, I am getting sleepy...

Well IMO I think everyone reaches a stage where they want something different from Dims. Not everyone is going to be in the same journey... 

And are men Scrutinized? Sure! there are some threads where a few brave men have posted pictures of various body parts on the weight board- but, Sadly the participation is few compared to similar threads regarding the Women.


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## Fascinita (Aug 2, 2009)

tonynyc said:


> So true - please bear with me. I'll make it short as it is late. I would write more;but, I am getting sleepy...
> 
> Well IMO I think everyone reaches a stage where they want something different from Dims. Not everyone is going to be in the same journey...
> 
> And are men Scrutinized? Sure! there are some threads where a few brave men have posted pictures of various body parts on the weight board- but, Sadly the participation is few compared to similar threads regarding the Women.



The "" was really in jest. 

Good post. :bow:


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## KHayes666 (Aug 2, 2009)

tonynyc said:


> So true - please bear with me. I'll make it short as it is late. I would write more;but, I am getting sleepy...
> 
> Well IMO I think everyone reaches a stage where they want something different from Dims. Not everyone is going to be in the same journey...
> 
> And are men Scrutinized? Sure! there are some threads where a few brave men have posted pictures of various body parts on the weight board- but, Sadly the participation is few compared to similar threads regarding the Women.



Men bear the brunt no matter what they say.

Just the other day I saw a thread where a guy posted what exactly he wanted in a woman and the usual suspects jumped on him saying he was "objectifying" All the guy was said was what he wanted, is it so wrong for someone to say what he's looking for?

Is it ok for Kayrae to say she likes tall men but its not ok for you or me to stand in the middle of the weight board and say we like big bellies? Is it wrong for G.E.F. to say she loves huge members but its not ok for me to slide down the superslide at Water Country and shout I LOVE FAT PEOPLE as loud as I can?

Its one thing to say "I like big fat asses and any girl who doesn't have one sucks" but its another to admit that they like an hourglass figure and would like to go out with someone who has that.

I've been saying it for years, objectification goes both ways.


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## mossystate (Aug 2, 2009)

KHayes666 said:


> Men bear the brunt no matter what they say.
> 
> Just the other day I saw a thread where a guy posted what exactly he wanted in a woman and the usual suspects jumped on him saying he was "objectifying" All the guy was said was what he wanted, is it so wrong for someone to say what he's looking for?
> 
> ...





Would you PLEASE..for the love of Mike...or Bob...or Julie....learn the difference between objectification/dismissing the human being behind the bod...and...simply stating a preference. 

Please. You need to do this. Put it at the top of your To Do List.


this was the next in line on my subscribed threads...so...no paranoia...k?


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## KHayes666 (Aug 2, 2009)

mossystate said:


> Would you PLEASE..for the love of Mike...or Bob...or Julie....learn the difference between objectification/dismissing the human being behind the bod...and...simply stating a preference.
> 
> Please. You need to do this. Put it at the top of your To Do List.
> 
> ...



Who's dismissing the human being behind the bod? Seriously.....you can tell if someone's a shallow asshole just for saying he likes a big butt?

You can give Shawn Spencer a run for his money if you're that psychic.

I can stand here and say So and So has a hell of a belly and would love to rub it and kiss it and massage it.....would you say to me I'm being shallow? Do you know if I'm actually talking to this person and are good friends with them?

I agree in some cases there have been some creepy dudes, but for the most part its a witch hunt.

Again, not everyone is out for blood


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## tonynyc (Aug 2, 2009)

KHayes666 said:


> Is it ok for Kayrae to say she likes tall men but its not ok for you or me to stand in the middle of the weight board and say we like big bellies? Is it wrong for G.E.F. to say she loves huge members but its not ok for me to slide down the superslide at Water Country and shout I LOVE FAT PEOPLE as loud as I can?
> 
> I've been saying it for years, objectification goes both ways.



*Absolutely* objectification happens regardless of Gender.... And yes you are correct in your remarks " Of course it all depends on what type of Fat Person" you are shouting for.... 

The interesting thing about the Kayrae thread. None of the male Dimmers here were insulted or threatened by it. You did not see one post from from ( short or avg. ht) guys saying "Oh Well here's another thread about women that like tall guys"...As far as Media this is the 'one' area that they often hit Men about (their Height)... 

I'm not tall just avg. ht [5'10"] and heck if there are women that only like tall guys that's fine- I've been very fortunate to meet BBW that were fine with me.


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## KHayes666 (Aug 2, 2009)

tonynyc said:


> *Absolutely* objectification happens regardless of Gender.... And yes you are correct in your remarks " Of course it all depends on what type of Fat Person" you are shouting for....
> 
> *The interesting thing about the Kayrae thread. None of the male Dimmers here were insulted or threatened by it. * You did not see one post from from ( short or avg. ht) guys saying "Oh Well here's another thread about women that like tall guys"...As far as Media this is the 'one' area that they often hit Men about (their Height)...
> 
> I'm not tall just avg. ht [5'10"] and heck if there are women that only like tall guys that's fine- I've been very fortunate to meet BBW that were fine with me.



That's EXACTLY what I'm talking about. Why is it all these women get so bent out of the shape when they're not the body size of certain people's desires and the male members don't care when someone wants somebody that they're not?

Preferences are just that, preferences


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## olwen (Aug 2, 2009)

KHayes666 said:


> That's EXACTLY what I'm talking about. Why is it all these women get so bent out of the shape when they're not the body size of certain people's desires and the male members don't care when someone wants somebody that they're not?
> 
> Preferences are just that, preferences



Women's bodies are scrutinized on a daily basis, not just fat women. We get messages from the media, from family, from friends that either imply or outright say we are not an ideal whatever. Hearing, seeing these messages all the time is bound to make even the most confident of women feel sensitive about their bodies in varying degrees. Everyone is of course entitled to their preferences, but even if a woman hears someone say they would prefer something they don't have no matter how nicely they put it, it can be dismissive to some.

I could wax philosophic about why guys are so worried about the size of their penises when the average woman doesn't give a shit, but I get it. That part of your bodies are under constant scrutiny so it's no wonder guys get all senstive about it and get all bent out of shape if anyone implies their dicks aren't good enough.


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## GTAFA (Aug 2, 2009)

I just read most of this thread, and was startled that most of the thread isnt ABOUT the thread, but off on various tangents (screen names, feminism). I wonder if that might be apt however, considering the actual subject of this thread.

You'll recall that in the initial post katherine22 wrote that the atmosphere is "*charged with the one agenda of allowing the men to "worship" their "goddesses,",*making it "*difficult it is to have real, adult, flowing conversations*".

And poof, you read this thread and see how charged all communication can sometimes be at dimensions. They're having a large conversation, notwithstanding the disagreements. But if everyone agreed it wouldn't be a conversation, would it...(?) 

The very thing that brings you to Dimensions -- the enlightened attitude about size --is sometimes connected to other less desireable behaviours. Katherine comments that *"I've never found being thought of as attractive so suffocating."* I wonder if the happy medium exists yet. The ideal would be an enlightened space, tolerant of diversity, people of size, etc; in practice, Dimensions isn't yet fully tolerant. It's a place where size is valorized, where an alternative set of values largely mirroring those of society are in place. Dimensions is not a place where it's okay to be supersized, so much as a place where some of the supersized get to experience the dubious benefits of being sex symbols. And those who refuse to play --in any community--will always experience friction.

But without friction there's no heat.


----------



## mossystate (Aug 2, 2009)

KHayes666 said:


> Who's dismissing the human being behind the bod? Seriously.....you can tell if someone's a shallow asshole just for saying he likes a big butt?



_Would you PLEASE..for the love of Mike...or Bob...or Julie....learn the difference between objectification/dismissing the human being behind the bod...and...simply stating a preference. 

Please. You need to do this. Put it at the top of your To Do List._

Bears repeating.

YOU gave the example of Kayrae saying she likes tall men, and that is ok...but that people don't think it's ok for you to say you like bellies. How many people get upset over a_ *simple*_ declaration of a preference. Really. You are reaching.


----------



## aussiefa63 (Aug 2, 2009)

GTAFA said:


> I just read most of this thread, and was startled that most of the thread isnt ABOUT the thread, but off on various tangents (screen names, feminism). I wonder if that might be apt however, considering the actual subject of this thread.
> 
> You'll recall that in the initial post katherine22 wrote that the atmosphere is "charged with the one agenda of allowing the men to "worship" their "goddesses,",making it "difficult it is to have real, adult, flowing conversations".
> 
> ...



Have to agree. I read throught this thread & it's gotten way off track.

I can understand Katherines point, but I can also see if from the FA's view. Here the FA has found BBW & SSBBW ladies that aren't in hidding, that are out there promoting that big girls rock, big girls have feelings too, big girls are sexy. So the poor old FA that may or may not have hidden his feeling about BBW/SSBBW women finds a place like this & WOW! he cuts loose & may say things he souldn't due to over excitment.

For me I have always respected women & have always tried to be a gentleman around women & maybe in that way, more of us FA's wouldn't be making the ladies we cherish feel so pressured.


----------



## mediaboy (Aug 2, 2009)

I was talking about circle jerking.

Its when a group of posters forms a cool kid click and then post at one another instead of about the threads topic.

This also applies when people post at a poster about their gigantic ass or something as similarly trite and unromantic.

I was suggesting that it is a necessary evil, not mandatory.





Fascinita said:


> Really? Let's scrutinize men exclusively a while--their bodies and sexuality, mostly--and take it easy on the girls. See how quickly the community disbands.
> 
> I don't think your argument holds. There are ways of relating and finding community that are not austere and yet do not hinge on constant one-directional scrutiny of women's bodies and sexuality. And have you seen how upset some people get when some women make it evident that they have stuff on their minds beyond "Look at my sexy weight gain!"? I think this dynamic is maybe what the OP has been referring to?
> 
> If you're saying we shouldn't question it because what you find here is enough for you... well, that strikes me as a little myopic. Can we have a community of one?


----------



## tonynyc (Aug 2, 2009)

mediaboy said:


> I was talking about circle jerking.
> 
> Its when a group of posters forms a cool kid click and then post at one another instead of about the threads topic.
> 
> ...




Here's the thing if the OP was looking more of a "feminist" perspective on this issue perhaps this may not have been the forum. There hasn't been any additional feedback so who knows...

Given that Posting is in the "Weight Board" you are going to get feedback by all Genders on this issue- It happens - Nothing wrong with that ... 

and as for individual Poster's Avatars I could care less about that. I just look to see what is being said and what ideas are being engaged.


----------



## superodalisque (Aug 3, 2009)

oky i'm playing devils advocate here but--is it just me? i'm a woman and i do find it a little odd for people to come to a site like this and not expect some sort of objectification on some level to be happening. its unrealistic to expect that it wouldn't. this site is about the admiration of the fat body after all. it was created so that people could have a safe place to do that. there seems to be an underlying assumption that all women hate objectification. a lot of women come here having been told how unappetizng thier bodies are on a regular basis by the media and even by people who know and love them. is it so bad if they come to a place where they will be fed compliments about thier bodies? not everyone sees this as a serious place to try and start a serious relationship etc... ideally its best to do your living in real life anyway. but being here can be an important part of a person's development when it comes to accepting that thier body is beautiful. it doesn't always have to be so very complicated. it would be a shame to deny that kind of accessability to someone who really needs it.

i don't think its wrong for a woman to show her body and have it appreciated at all. its a personal thing. and if a woman does not like it she doesn't have to do it. if other women have an issue with it because they feel they shouldn't have to compete with that for male attention i can understand why but i don't think its fair to other women. i also think that in the scheme of things it might not make a lot of sense simply because it would stem the tide of honest info about men coming directly from them. besides that if you feel you have to jump through so many hoops for a guy to be attracted to you he probably isn't all that into you anyway.

if you don't want a guy whose eyes are not always riveting to that then its good to now ahead of time who that is, rather than trying to squash down someone's true personality. you can center your attention on people you can feel comfortable with. if a guy wants to tell everyone he's attracted to what he likes about thier body whats the big deal? he probably is not the type of guy a woman who doesn't like sharing her attention with will want anyway. and no matter what women think or feel and how they try to impress that on men its good for them to realize that no matter how much a guy like that learns to repress it he will still be that way underneath. 

its good for BBWs online to know exactly what and who they're dealing with. the guys who behave well here without prompting will generally probably behave well anywhere and they don't have to change thier spots. but thats not always true. sometimes they look like angels here and are really horrible IRL. they may not use disrespectful language but they put BBWs through horrible things for real. the best thing is to observe someone IRL. one thing i have learned is that the net really doesn't tell you all that much about someone because its a fantasy world. you learn much more about someone if you take your time and get to know them in person. actions speak much louder than words.

its really up to women what they'll accept personally and what they won't. i think its especially a good idea not to demonize the people here male or female for doing what they do since most are on some kind of voyage of discovery and are still just trying to figure out who they are. but in the meantime i think its especially important that guys have thier full say so that women will know exactly who to stay away from and who to watch out for. do we really want to teach a guy to be a better sneakier cad than he already is? free flowing and honest communication tells us all what we need to know. sometimes objectification is a part of it. so, if a guy says something that disrespectful about other women thin or not you know that he probably doesn't respect women particularly in general--not even fat ones. just be glad you found out in an easy way.


----------



## thatgirl08 (Aug 3, 2009)

What the fuck is thread even about? I feel like I just read eight different threads combined in to one. I'm so confused.


----------



## superodalisque (Aug 3, 2009)

BarbBBW said:


> it is very distracting i can not get my eyes off of it LMAO



me either. the only way i can concentrate when i''m trying to post is when its off the sceen. its so pretty and round! and i'm dudecentric. i wonder how the guys can think at all.


----------



## superodalisque (Aug 3, 2009)

thatgirl08 said:


> What the fuck is thread even about? I feel like I just read eight different threads combined in to one. I'm so confused.



its about when a guy tells you how to frost your cupcake and doesn't like it when you frost it another way


----------



## thatgirl08 (Aug 3, 2009)

superodalisque said:


> its about when a guy tells you how to frost your cupcake and doesn't like it when you frost it another way



ohhhh, thanks for putting in my language


----------



## tonynyc (Aug 3, 2009)

superodalisque said:


> its about when a guy tells you how to frost your cupcake and doesn't like it when you frost it another way



Icing the cupcake another way Felicia? that's devious.  Passive-Aggressive 


Look's like what we have here is a "Thelma and Louise" moment,








Our beautiful ladies are abandoning this humble thread & leaving us  

While we argue the semantics of which way the cupcakes should be iced our lovely BBW will still be stranded here???    

*Logic* dictates that a road map should be provided to point our weary travelers to their destination. To the lovely BBW of dims you will be missed;but, please proceed this way ... I wonder if Brad Pitt is invited ? 


*For all those left behind & those who wish to stay and join in .. Enjoy the Detour & Revised Map and Topics to follow....*


----------



## Green Eyed Fairy (Aug 3, 2009)

KHayes666 said:


> Is it ok for Kayrae to say she likes tall men b*ut its not ok for you or me to stand in the middle of the weight board and say we like big bellies?*



Ermmmmmmmm....I actually have a thread....that's been around for quite some time....where I INVITE you and all the guys to come and say you like bellies.......  

It seems to be a popular thread- matter of fact I think you posted in it.....



KHayes666 said:


> Is it wrong for G.E.F. to say she loves huge members but its not ok for me to slide down the superslide at Water Country and shout I LOVE FAT PEOPLE as loud as I can?



Actually, I have made your argument but in the reverse. In one of the penis threads, a guy was bent because I agreed with another poster that women shouldn't be judged as "less" or put down if they prefer a bigger peen. I pointed out how all the menfolk are easily allowed their preferences for bigger butts, breasts, thighs, etc. and we should be allowed to "wish for more" ourselves. 

Kind of ironic, isn't it?  

Saying "I love bigger women" or even "Pear shaped women always catch my eye" is much different than saying something along the lines of "pear shaped women with 97 inch asses and 24 inch waists are the REAL women of the world and the only ones that count". 

See the difference? 




GTAFA said:


> And poof, you read this thread and see how charged all communication can sometimes be at dimensions. They're having a large conversation, notwithstanding the disagreements. But if everyone agreed it wouldn't be a conversation, would it...(?)



True dat - most likely not one worth reading anyway......




GTAFA said:


> The very thing that brings you to Dimensions -- the enlightened attitude about size --is sometimes connected to other less desireable behaviours. Katherine comments that *"I've never found being thought of as attractive so suffocating."* I wonder if the happy medium exists yet. The ideal would be an enlightened space, tolerant of diversity, people of size, etc; in practice, Dimensions isn't yet fully tolerant. I*t's a place where size is valorized, where an alternative set of values largely mirroring those of society are in place. Dimensions is not a place where it's okay to be supersized, so much as a place where some of the supersized get to experience the dubious benefits of being sex symbols. And those who refuse to play --in any community--will always experience friction.
> *
> But without friction there's no heat.




I like how you put this :bow:


----------



## tonynyc (Aug 3, 2009)

Green Eyed Fairy said:


> Kind of ironic, isn't it?
> 
> Saying "I love bigger women" or even "Pear shaped women always catch my eye" is much different than saying something along the lines of "pear shaped women with 97 inch asses and 24 inch waists are the REAL women of the world and the only ones that count".
> 
> See the difference?




Yes Greenie -It 'boils' down to semantics and how one expresses themselves. Now,even in the "I love Belly thread" if someone had made the statement :'I want a BBW with a 80" Triple F Bustline and 70" waistline'. Someone can also interpet that statement that only those Women are the real one... 

And Men often also Judged by other physical characteristics as well...

*Height* (Tall for the most part is good) ... 
The amazing thing about the " I Like Tall Thread" is that you did not see any angry postings from men who were not tall... maybe it's a difference as to how BBW expressed things.

*Weight*and I can only base things on some of my past attendance at the Dances/Bashes. "bbw/ssbbw and bhm/ssbhm pairings are the exception.." 

Perhaps others can chime in on their thoughts .. though some say it was lack of attendance by larger males. Though I think this issue has been bought up in the BHM/FFA forum...

*Other Masculine Characteristics* : Broad Shoulders - Strong Facial features- Nice Abs-Deep Voice to name a few


----------



## mediaboy (Aug 3, 2009)

tonynyc said:


> Here's the thing if the OP was looking more of a "feminist" perspective on this issue perhaps this may not have been the forum. There hasn't been any additional feedback so who knows...
> 
> Given that Posting is in the "Weight Board" you are going to get feedback by all Genders on this issue- It happens - Nothing wrong with that ...
> 
> and as for individual Poster's Avatars I could care less about that. I just look to see what is being said and what ideas are being engaged.



lol I just noticed your ass reference post, my bad.

I'm talking about when some one, out of the blue, says some one is attractive.

Sort of like having a conversation involving four or five people and then some one walks up out of the blue, points a finger and says, "Hey, you have a nice body part; lets have sex!".

Nothing personal homes 

*respect knuckle*


----------



## KHayes666 (Aug 3, 2009)

Green Eyed Fairy said:


> Ermmmmmmmm....I actually have a thread....that's been around for quite some time....where I INVITE you and all the guys to come and say you like bellies.......
> 
> It seems to be a popular thread- matter of fact I think you posted in it.....
> 
> ...


----------



## mossystate (Aug 3, 2009)

KHayes666 said:


> I'm merely defending the not-so-well-known dudes that say that they like big bellies and or butts and then get attacked by the usual suspects.





Could you find, and post, some of these attacks? I am not saying they don't exist, but, you are beating this drum made out of onion skins. 

So?


----------



## TraciJo67 (Aug 3, 2009)

KHayes666 said:


> I'm merely defending the not-so-well-known dudes that say that they like big bellies and or butts and then get attacked by the usual suspects.



Kevin I don't think even you actually believes this.


----------



## thatgirl08 (Aug 3, 2009)

TraciJo67 said:


> Kevin I don't think even you actually believes this.



Your avatar is so creepy. I did like, a triple take.


----------



## tonynyc (Aug 3, 2009)

Many changes have happened to this thread since it was Open by the OP - but, it was good that this question eventually put in the BBW Forum. It dealt with issues that I think can get a fair response in that venue.

Given the participation of different folks here and the direction that this thread is being rerouted to - perhaps additional questions can be discussed.

I'll throw out some points - I will combine some things that have been said before. Feel free to add any other point that you might want to add. 

The only thing that I ask up front is a "meaningful" dialogue- This is not a Gender pissing war just a heartfelt conversation from the participants. Humor is fine-but as long as we can flow and discuss that's all it's about...

1. Both Genders can be objectified? However- the response based on if it's a Man making the Statement vs. a Woman will get a different reaction. 

2. There is a difference in the semantics on how someone can make state their preference. This is pretty much proven in previous statements. Both Genders can react accordingly...However, answer this How come there's no drama in the Height Thread as this is clearly one factor Men are judged on... 

3. Does the presence of a Pay site Board for Men and Lack of a Pay site Board for Women on DIMS influence your perception of how folks are objectified.

4. *This Question is for the Ladies who choose to respond.*

The closest thing to any "Admiration" of Male Body parts is on the Weight Board. We've had an occasional request from BBW and a few brave folks have participated and answered the call.
Does the fact that so few Men participate disappoint you?

Add your questions here....


----------



## KHayes666 (Aug 3, 2009)

mossystate said:


> Could you find, and post, some of these attacks? I am not saying they don't exist, but, you are beating this drum made out of onion skins.
> 
> So?



That would require me to wade through multiple threads, some of which I forgot were posted on. So I will once I get home, this computer at work freezes every 5 seconds and is older than my grandma.


----------



## Fuzzy Necromancer (Aug 4, 2009)

superodalisque said:


> its about when a guy tells you how to frost your cupcake and doesn't like it when you frost it another way



I'm still a bit unclear myself. The initial post is a bit unfocused. =s


----------



## nykspree8 (Aug 4, 2009)

KHayes666 said:


> lol that proves my point. I'm saying the guys that say "Girls that don't have 97 inch asses and 24 inch waists are a waste of time and not real women" deserve to get what's coming to them.
> 
> I'm merely defending the not-so-well-known dudes that say that they like big bellies and or butts and then get attacked by the usual suspects.



I like big bellies, butts, AND boobs  all preferably on the same woman,...attack me :O


----------



## tonynyc (Aug 4, 2009)

Fuzzy Necromancer said:


> I'm still a bit unclear myself. The initial post is a bit unfocused. =s



Yes the initial posting was confusing - I just think that being posted on the Weight Board is going to get inout from all sides- now if this is not what the OP had intended maybe it was correct to have a discussion moved to the other forum *As noted in * Thelma & Louise posting made earlier 

I have not seen any further input from the OP on this thread and heck the discussion continues with whatever direction it goes...


----------



## Green Eyed Fairy (Aug 4, 2009)

tonynyc said:


> Yes Greenie -It 'boils' down to semantics and how one expresses themselves. Now,even in the "I love Belly thread" if someone had made the statement :'I want a BBW with a 80" Triple F Bustline and 70" waistline'. *Someone can also interpet that statement that only those Women are the real one...
> *
> And Men often also Judged by other physical characteristics as well...
> 
> ...




Tony....that statement I made about the only "real women and the only women that count" in my first post......it wasn't me reaching and reading something into it. I have read that- more than once.
Sure I can agree about not reading too much into things, but it's not all in our imaginations.

And yeah....those numbers sure are tiring and trite.


----------



## tonynyc (Aug 4, 2009)

nykspree8 said:


> I like big bellies, butts, AND boobs  all preferably on the same woman,...attack me :O



Only if you "quantify" -numbers where are the numbers....  then the fur will fly.


----------



## Green Eyed Fairy (Aug 4, 2009)

KHayes666 said:


> lol that proves my point. I'm saying the guys that say "Girls that don't have 97 inch asses and 24 inch waists are a waste of time and not real women" deserve to get what's coming to them.
> 
> I'm merely defending the not-so-well-known dudes that say that they like big bellies and or butts and then get attacked by the usual suspects.



Then I cannot blame you there for someone just saying they like big arses. To be honest, I suspect a lot of the women here LIKE reading that- just like some of us enjoy the belly threads. 

Not all women jump on all the men all the time. Some people here disagree...and it's not even men vs women all the time. Sometimes the women disagree with one another....as do the men.


----------



## Green Eyed Fairy (Aug 4, 2009)

nykspree8 said:


> I like big bellies, butts, AND boobs  all preferably on the same woman,...attack me :O




Oh stop trying to turn this into a picture thread


----------



## tonynyc (Aug 4, 2009)

Green Eyed Fairy said:


> Tony....that statement I made about the only "real women and the only women that count" in my first post......it wasn't me reaching and reading something into it. I have read that- more than once.
> Sure I can agree about not reading too much into things, but it's not all in our imaginations.
> 
> And yeah....those numbers sure are tiring and trite.



Don't get me wrong - the way something can be said .. yes it can make someone feel less than valued. I never implied that your comment was reaching


----------



## Green Eyed Fairy (Aug 4, 2009)

tonynyc said:


> Don't get me wrong - the way something can be said .. yes it can make someone feel less than valued. I never implied that your comment was reaching



Okay  


SEE??? I can actually AGREE WITH the menz sometimes


----------



## tonynyc (Aug 4, 2009)

mediaboy said:


> lol I just noticed your ass reference post, my bad.
> 
> I'm talking about when some one, out of the blue, says some one is attractive.
> 
> ...



No problem Media - just put the "knuckle duster" away :happy:

-------------------------------------------------------


----------



## BarbBBW (Aug 4, 2009)

I love being seen as a super fat sexual goddess. WHether men or women see me as such, thats the way I feel. All women are goddesses and should be treated as such all the time. I say Yes, put us on a pedestal, yes worship us for our free flowing fat bodies!! Ye, Yes, Yes!!:bow:


----------



## mossystate (Aug 4, 2009)

* waits...reads the paper *


----------



## TraciJo67 (Aug 4, 2009)

mossystate said:


> * waits...reads the paper *



Got a match, Thelm - uh, Mossything?


----------



## StarWitness (Aug 4, 2009)

BarbBBW said:


> All women are goddesses and should be treated as such all the time.



As a subset of all women, I'd like to opt out of that statement.


----------



## fffff (Aug 4, 2009)

You can admire my fantastic ass, but if you don't treat me like an intelligent and confident adult then you can kiss my splendid buttocks goodbye. 

Like wise, if you expect to be treated like a goddess I'm going to treat you like a short-bus rider.


----------



## mossystate (Aug 4, 2009)

StarWitness said:


> As a subset of all women, I'd like to opt out of that statement.



Hmmmm, yeah. I will also stay off the pedestal.


----------



## Miss Vickie (Aug 4, 2009)

mossystate said:


> Hmmmm, yeah. I will also stay off the pedestal.



I'm afraid of heights, so if it's all the same to y'all, I'll keep my ass planted firmly on terra firma as well.


----------



## TraciJo67 (Aug 4, 2009)

StarWitness said:


> As a subset of all women, I'd like to opt out of that statement.





fffff said:


> You can admire my fantastic ass, but if you don't treat me like an intelligent and confident adult then you can kiss my splendid buttocks goodbye.
> 
> Like wise, if you expect to be treated like a goddess I'm going to treat you like a short-bus rider.





mossystate said:


> Hmmmm, yeah. I will also stay off the pedestal.





Miss Vickie said:


> I'm afraid of heights, so if it's all the same to y'all, I'll keep my ass planted firmly on terra firma as well.




I want to be placed upon a pedestal and worshipped by y'all. All other applicants/supplicants can kiss my flat, fat, pasty white ass


----------



## Miss Vickie (Aug 4, 2009)

TraciJo67 said:


> I want to be placed upon a pedestal and worshipped by y'all. All other applicants/supplicants can kiss my flat, fat, pasty white ass



Smartass. 

I think the OP makes an interesting point, though. One I agree with, although I feel funny saying so on the Weight Board, which is all about lovin' on the (fat!) female form.


----------



## TraciJo67 (Aug 4, 2009)

Miss Vickie said:


> Smartass.
> 
> I think the OP makes an interesting point, though. One I agree with, although I feel funny saying so on the Weight Board, which is all about lovin' on the (fat!) female form.



I know, Vick. I just wanted an excuse to say fat, flat, and pasty white + kiss it


----------



## Miss Vickie (Aug 4, 2009)

TraciJo67 said:


> I know, Vick. I just wanted an excuse to say fat, flat, and pasty white + kiss it



Yeah. Like you need an excuse.


----------



## mossystate (Aug 4, 2009)

TraciJo67 said:


> I want to be placed upon a pedestal and worshipped by y'all. All other applicants/supplicants can kiss my flat, fat, pasty white ass



Great...another way for you to leave a bad taste in my mouth.


----------



## Miss Vickie (Aug 4, 2009)

mossystate said:


> Great...another way for you to leave a bad taste in my mouth.



Uh... another way? Dare I ask?


----------



## TraciJo67 (Aug 4, 2009)

Miss Vickie said:


> Yeah. Like you need an excuse.





mossystate said:


> Great...another way for you to leave a bad taste in my mouth.



Did y'all not get the memo on just what worship consists of? Teh snark shall be met with punishments. Of the non-chocolate, non-edible, mostly painful variety.


----------



## Miss Vickie (Aug 4, 2009)

TraciJo67 said:


> Did y'all not get the memo on just what worship consists of? Teh snark shall be met with punishments. Of the non-chocolate, non-edible, mostly painful variety.



You promise? :smitten::smitten::smitten::smitten::smitten:


----------



## StarWitness (Aug 4, 2009)

TraciJo67 said:


> I want to be placed upon a pedestal and worshipped by y'all. All other applicants/supplicants can kiss my flat, fat, pasty white ass



I'll have to get a little cymbal-banging monkey to use as a graven image.


----------



## mossystate (Aug 4, 2009)

Miss Vickie said:


> Uh... another way? Dare I ask?




I will never be the same...let's just put it that way. * shakes and sobs *


----------



## tonynyc (Aug 4, 2009)

BarbBBW said:


> I love being seen as a super fat sexual goddess. WHether men or women see me as such, thats the way I feel.



Barb: Good for you - having a positive outlook on life is a good thing.


----------



## nykspree8 (Aug 4, 2009)

BarbBBW said:


> I love being seen as a super fat sexual goddess. WHether men or women see me as such, thats the way I feel. All women are goddesses and should be treated as such all the time. I say Yes, put us on a pedestal, yes worship us for our free flowing fat bodies!! Ye, Yes, Yes!!:bow:



Well Barb, I consider myself to be a god, that's just the way I feel about myself...no no, I'm not that conceited, maybe just a demi-god


----------



## BarbBBW (Aug 4, 2009)

nykspree8 said:


> Well Barb, I consider myself to be a god, that's just the way I feel about myself...no no, I'm not that conceited, maybe just a demi-god



exactly, as FA's should be considered!!


----------



## KHayes666 (Aug 4, 2009)

nykspree8 said:


> Well Barb, I consider myself to be a god, that's just the way I feel about myself...no no, I'm not that conceited, maybe just a demi-god



does that make me Gozer the Gozarian? lol


----------



## tonynyc (Aug 4, 2009)

KHayes666 said:


> does that make me Gozer the Gozarian? lol



Is that Conan's Cousin?


----------



## KHayes666 (Aug 4, 2009)

tonynyc said:


> Is that Conan's Cousin?



no...its this guy in humanoid form


----------



## tonynyc (Aug 4, 2009)

KHayes666 said:


> no...its this guy in humanoid form



LOL - heck that is a Demi-Fat God


----------



## nykspree8 (Aug 4, 2009)

KHayes666 said:


> no...its this guy in humanoid form



Now those are the kind of measurements I'm talking about, lookit those thighs!!! rofl


----------



## olwen (Aug 4, 2009)

tonynyc said:


> Barb: Good for you - having a positive outlook on life is a good thing.



Not sure why, but this seems like a weird response to me and made me think......In other words, the woman who likes sex as much as guys are supposed to, in the same exact way that guys are supposed to, and who doesn't have any sexual hang ups is the best kind of woman. Natch. 

...Now I'm starting to think that right there might be The definition of confident fat woman to some FAs....Tony, am I off base here?

....And Barb, please don't think I'm taking a shot at you, I'm not. I wouldn't mind being worshiped right now actually. LOL ....Just commenting on Tony's response.


----------



## tonynyc (Aug 4, 2009)

olwen said:


> Not sure why, but this seems like a weird response to me and made me think......In other words, the woman who likes sex as much as guys are supposed to, in the same exact way that guys are supposed to, and who doesn't have any sexual hang ups is the best kind of woman. Natch.
> 
> ...Now I'm starting to think that right there might be The definition of confident fat woman to some FAs....Tony, am I off base here?
> 
> ....And Barb, please don't think I'm taking a shot at you, I'm not. I wouldn't mind being worshiped right now actually. LOL ....Just commenting on Tony's response.



* Hi Olwen:
Just a short response from me. Not necessarily just about sex-but, liking yourself. It never hurts to be your own cheerleader too....*


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## olwen (Aug 4, 2009)

tonynyc said:


> * Hi Olwen:
> Just a short response from me. Not necessarily just about sex-but, liking yourself. It never hurts to be your own cheerleader too....*



Believe me Tony, I have zero problems advocating for myself when it's necessary in the bedroom or otherwise, but I wouldn't equate being able to tell your partner what you like/need as worship....I suppose the issue for me here is the definition of "worship". It has several meanings for me, (sexual and nonsexual) not all of which are necessarily positive....


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## tonynyc (Aug 5, 2009)

olwen said:


> Believe me Tony, I have zero problems advocating for myself when it's necessary in the bedroom or otherwise, but I wouldn't equate being able to tell your partner what you like/need as worship....I suppose the issue for me here is the definition of "worship". It has several meanings for me, (sexual and nonsexual) not all of which are necessarily positive....



Well Olwen the interesting fact about life is that there can be several meanings and while you might feel that some of these definitions are negative - you cannot deny the positive.


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## olwen (Aug 5, 2009)

tonynyc said:


> Well Olwen the interesting fact about life is that there can be several meanings and while you might feel that some of these definitions are negative - you cannot deny the positive.



...Let's just say, the glass contains liquid. :happy:


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## superodalisque (Aug 5, 2009)

olwen said:


> Believe me Tony, I have zero problems advocating for myself when it's necessary in the bedroom or otherwise, but I wouldn't equate being able to tell your partner what you like/need as worship....I suppose the issue for me here is the definition of "worship". It has several meanings for me, (sexual and nonsexual) not all of which are necessarily positive....



i know what you mean. many times when someone calls me a queen or says they want to worship me it sends up a red flag. its not that i would not like being worshiped or being treated like a queen to someone. the problem is in the BBW world when people use that kind of language i find it generally does not mean that in the positive sense. what it generally means is they would like to prescript your actions and responses bounded by thier submissive fantasies. i have talked to people who use that kind of language. Tony , i'm not sure you'd understand as a guy because you never get to be on the receiving end of conversations like that--so maybe i can flesh out what Olwen is saying. i'm not sure if we have the same exact idea but here it goes: often the worship thing it kind of translates to "can i objectify you?" and when i say that i don't mean appreciate you physically as a part of being a total woman.

the idea of treating you like a queen, if you'd date him, to guys like this generally means he would like to take you to a cheap buffet and watch you eat. he'll probably look frumpy. he'll also ask you how much you weigh and probably want to know the weight story of your life--you know, how much, when and why did you gain all of your weight. he'll never ask you about anything you really care about. and if you bring up the subject of something else he will quickly turn the convo back to your fat. 

in my opinion thats why the worshipful thing is not all that appetizing to a lot of women here. i think they'd truly love some real worship but its a fake worship that gets offered. true worship is all about the wants and wishes of the diety. she is listened to. she has true authority. she gets a lot of respect. your manners must be impeccable around her. her true wishes are catered to. thats not what this kind of worship is about. if it were then women would get treated like true queens. i don't know too many women who wouldn't like that. but in general the worshipful language thing is often done by guys who wouldn't even bother to put on a fresh shirt to come and see you.


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## TraciJo67 (Aug 5, 2009)

superodalisque said:


> i know what you mean. many times when someone calls me a queen or says they want to worship me it sends up a red flag. its not that i would not like being worshiped or being treated like a queen to someone. the problem is in the BBW world when people use that kind of language i find it generally does not mean that in the positive sense. what it generally means is they would like to prescript your actions and responses bounded by thier submissive fantasies. i have talked to people who use that kind of language. Tony , i'm not sure you'd understand as a guy because you never get to be on the receiving end of conversations like that--so maybe i can flesh out what Olwen is saying. i'm not sure if we have the same exact idea but here it goes: often the worship thing it kind of translates to "can i objectify you?" and when i say that i don't mean appreciate you physically as a part of being a total woman.
> 
> the idea of treating you like a queen, if you'd date him, to guys like this generally means he would like to take you to a cheap buffet and watch you eat. he'll probably look frumpy. he'll also ask you how much you weigh and probably want to know the weight story of your life--you know, how much, when and why did you gain all of your weight. he'll never ask you about anything you really care about. and if you bring up the subject of something else he will quickly turn the convo back to your fat.
> 
> in my opinion thats why the worshipful thing is not all that appetizing to a lot of women here. i think they'd truly love some real worship but its a fake worship that gets offered. true worship is all about the wants and wishes of the diety. she is listened to. she has true authority. she gets a lot of respect. your manners must be impeccable around her. her true wishes are catered to. thats not what this kind of worship is about. if it were then women would get treated like true queens. i don't know too many women who wouldn't like that. but in general the worshipful language thing is often done by guys who wouldn't even bother to put on a fresh shirt to come and see you.



This. So much this.

Also, I equate worship with something that isn't very realistic at all. I would quickly grow bored with someone who wanted to "worship" me, even in the positive sense, as the relationship wouldn't be on equal footing. 

I resent the implication that a woman who rejects the notion of 'worship' must have self-esteem issues. I am an accomplished, intelligent, attractive woman in my own right and if I sought out the kind of attention we're talking about here, I'd find it. And I've absolutely no doubt that Vickie, Olwen, Monique, SuperD, and all others who have contributed to this thread would have no difficulty as well. This is about valuing yourself enough to want someone who appreciates all aspects of who (as well as what) you are. To that end, my self-esteem is just fine, thanks


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## olwen (Aug 5, 2009)

superodalisque said:


> i know what you mean. many times when someone calls me a queen or says they want to worship me it sends up a red flag. its not that i would not like being worshiped or being treated like a queen to someone. *the problem is in the BBW world when people use that kind of language i find it generally does not mean that in the positive sense. what it generally means is they would like to prescript your actions and responses bounded by thier submissive fantasies.* i have talked to people who use that kind of language. Tony , i'm not sure you'd understand as a guy because you never get to be on the receiving end of conversations like that--so maybe i can flesh out what Olwen is saying. i'm not sure if we have the same exact idea but here it goes: *often the worship thing it kind of translates to "can i objectify you?" and when i say that i don't mean appreciate you physically as a part of being a total woman.*
> 
> the idea of treating you like a queen, if you'd date him, to guys like this generally means he would like to take you to a cheap buffet and watch you eat. he'll probably look frumpy. he'll also ask you how much you weigh and probably want to know the weight story of your life--you know, how much, when and why did you gain all of your weight. he'll never ask you about anything you really care about. and if you bring up the subject of something else he will quickly turn the convo back to your fat.
> 
> in my opinion thats why the worshipful thing is not all that appetizing to a lot of women here. i think they'd truly love some real worship but its a fake worship that gets offered. true worship is all about the wants and wishes of the diety. she is listened to. she has true authority. she gets a lot of respect. your manners must be impeccable around her. her true wishes are catered to. thats not what this kind of worship is about. if it were then women would get treated like true queens. i don't know too many women who wouldn't like that. but in general the worshipful language thing is often done by guys who wouldn't even bother to put on a fresh shirt to come and see you.



Yes exactly. Just from my point of view, when I'm approached by submissives in the BDSM scene "can I worship you?" translates as "will you squash me?" or "will you sit on my face?" or "will you 'overpower me' and sit on my face?" NOT AT ALL my idea of D/s worship. It makes me feel more like a bag of fat than it does like a person, as if it's my job to squash some random guy just cause of my size. From a guy I'm already sleeping with it's fine, but not from some random guy. 

If some guy really wants to worship me, he'll clean my kitchen and be awed of the fact that I'd allow him to be in the prescence of my stuff. LOL


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## kayrae (Aug 6, 2009)

Oh Olwen, I am always down for anyone who wants to clean my kitchen.


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## thatgirl08 (Aug 6, 2009)

I wonder how the long the idea of the women as a goddess could really be sustained in a long term relationship? I think it's natural for people to seek equality in a given situation. It may seem 'hot' at first but how long will that matter when the lawn needs to be mowed, dinner is burning on the stove and little Susie needs to be driven to her dance lessons?


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## bdog (Aug 6, 2009)

thatgirl08 said:


> I wonder how the long the idea of the women as a goddess could really be sustained in a long term relationship? I think it's natural for people to seek equality in a given situation. It may seem 'hot' at first but how long will that matter when the lawn needs to be mowed, dinner is burning on the stove and little Susie needs to be driven to her dance lessons?



Oh, there's definitely people who do it long-term, as a lifestyle. 

I know what you mean about the long term thing, though. Worshipping the TV is kinda nice after a really long hard day of work.


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## nykspree8 (Aug 6, 2009)

When I think of treating a woman like a goddess, images of women in white robes, lounging around, fanned, and being fed grapes pops into my mind


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## Santaclear (Aug 6, 2009)

I feel women should be worshiped as Goddesses, but at the same time they're like pinatas.


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## thatgirl08 (Aug 6, 2009)

bdog said:


> Oh, there's definitely people who do it long-term, as a lifestyle.



I just think this would be difficult to maintain over a long period of time.. impossible, even.


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## bdog (Aug 6, 2009)

thatgirl08 said:


> I just think this would be difficult to maintain over a long period of time.. impossible, even.



Well, you can think of service like giving a gift. You feel the opposite of drained even though you're giving your time/money/love away. It's like the holidays all year! Plus, goddesses don't just receive. They also nurture.

As far as mowing the lawn goes, well, yeah, of course. I don't know anyone who wouldn't get bored being fed grapes all day, anyway. 

Anyway, I'm not an expert. My friend the internet is, though.


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## Santaclear (Aug 6, 2009)

I used to use this word "Goddess" a lot and I really do feel fat women are great and possess an almost magical quality, but at this point the word has been overused and seems to have lost much of it's currency, especially on the internet.


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## Miss Vickie (Aug 6, 2009)

TraciJo67 said:


> I resent the implication that a woman who rejects the notion of 'worship' must have self-esteem issues. I am an accomplished, intelligent, attractive woman in my own right and if I sought out the kind of attention we're talking about here, I'd find it. And I've absolutely no doubt that Vickie, Olwen, Monique, SuperD, and all others who have contributed to this thread would have no difficulty as well. This is about valuing yourself enough to want someone who appreciates all aspects of who (as well as what) you are. To that end, my self-esteem is just fine, thanks



This. What she said. And, yeah, I'm pretty good with the male attention thing. I've got about as much as I can handle, thankyouverymuch.  As for self esteem, mine's quite good, good enough, in fact, that I'm pretty direct and clear in what I say, even at the cost of the good will of the men here, and elsewhere.



thatgirl08 said:


> I wonder how the long the idea of the women as a goddess could really be sustained in a long term relationship? I think it's natural for people to seek equality in a given situation. It may seem 'hot' at first but how long will that matter when the lawn needs to be mowed, dinner is burning on the stove and little Susie needs to be driven to her dance lessons?



I think you're right. It's not really sustainable. Which is why it's part of the whole objectification thing that I mentioned in the BBW forum. To me it's part and parcel of that whole "treat women as objects [to screw, to worship, to idolize]". Once we open our mouths and perhaps disagree, or ask for something, or fart or whatever, that goes out the window. Then you're left with... what?



Santaclear said:


> I used to use this word "Goddess" a lot and I really do feel fat women are great and possess an almost magical quality, but at this point the word has been overused and seems to have lost much of it's currency, especially on the internet.



Yeah. I think it's fairly trite.


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## thatgirl08 (Aug 6, 2009)

bdog said:


> Well, you can think of service like giving a gift. You feel the opposite of drained even though you're giving your time/money/love away. It's like the holidays all year! Plus, goddesses don't just receive. They also nurture.
> 
> As far as mowing the lawn goes, well, yeah, of course. I don't know anyone who wouldn't get bored being fed grapes all day, anyway.
> 
> Anyway, I'm not an expert. My friend the internet is, though.



Yeah but it'd be like giving a gift 24/7, 365 days a year for like 50years of marriage? I don't think that's a sustainable lifestyle. Reality has a way of intervening. When bills need to be paid, and children need to be taken care of, and the house needs to be cleaned on a weekly basis, meals need to be made etc. etc. How long is the idea of the BBW as a goddess going to remain appealing? Not to mention, how many women are going to be satisifed with the loss of independence that would naturally come from a situation like that? I think you'd be hardpressed to find two people in the right situation to make this work, that's all. 



Miss Vickie said:


> I think you're right. It's not really sustainable. Which is why it's part of the whole objectification thing that I mentioned in the BBW forum. To me it's part and parcel of that whole "treat women as objects [to screw, to worship, to idolize]". Once we open our mouths and perhaps disagree, or ask for something, or fart or whatever, that goes out the window. Then you're left with... what?



Yeah, I agree.


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## nykspree8 (Aug 6, 2009)

Santaclear said:


> I used to use this word "Goddess" a lot and I really do feel fat women are great and possess an almost magical quality, but at this point the word has been overused and seems to have lost much of it's currency, especially on the internet.



I used it when having sex with my ex, I'd call her a goddess...i don't think that's anything out of the ordinary though *shrug*


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## mossystate (Aug 6, 2009)

Kevin...still waiting for all those examples!


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Aug 6, 2009)

olwen said:


> Yes exactly. Just from my point of view, when I'm approached by submissives in the BDSM scene *"can I worship you?" translates as "will you squash me?" or "will you sit on my face?" or "will you 'overpower me' and sit on my face?" NOT AT ALL my idea of D/s worship. It makes me feel more like a bag of fat than it does like a person, as if it's my job to squash some random guy just cause of my size. From a guy I'm already sleeping with it's fine, but not from some random guy. *
> 
> If some guy really wants to worship me, he'll clean my kitchen and be awed of the fact that I'd allow him to be in the prescence of my stuff. LOL



Indeed.......I don't know about the BDSM scene but I suspect this crosses all the lifestyle preferences. Whenever a guy is "talking about you" so often time, as in he wants to see more pics, gives compliments, wants to see, say and push for things that a woman is not ready for.......it's not REALLY about her but about him and what HE wants. 




nykspree8 said:


> When I think of treating a woman like a goddess, images of women in white robes, lounging around, fanned, *and being fed grapes* pops into my mind



I prefer chocolates......:happy:


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## tonynyc (Aug 6, 2009)

Green Eyed Fairy said:


> Indeed.......I don't know about the BDSM scene but I suspect this crosses all the lifestyle preferences. Whenever a guy is "talking about you" so often time, as in he wants to see more pics, gives compliments, wants to see, say and push for things that a woman is not ready for.......it's not REALLY about her but about him and what HE wants.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Milk Chocolate? Dark Chocolate? BitterSweet?
Aren't you the sweet innocent that requested Men's Armz aka "Guns"


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Aug 6, 2009)

tonynyc said:


> Milk Chocolate? Dark Chocolate? BitterSweet?
> Aren't you the sweet innocent that requested Men's Armz aka "Guns"



I like big menz armz to fan me and feed me dark chocolates....and hold me while we sekz.....duh 


Oh and strong armz and handz make good massages.... :wubu:


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## tonynyc (Aug 6, 2009)

tonynyc said:


> Milk Chocolate? Dark Chocolate? BitterSweet?
> Aren't you the sweet innocent that requested Men's Armz aka "Guns"





Green Eyed Fairy said:


> I like big menz armz to fan me and feed me dark chocolates....and hold me while we sekz.....duh
> 
> 
> Oh and strong armz and handz make good massages.... :wubu:



These weight lifting treated digits are ready 







So are the Forearms


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Aug 6, 2009)

I do declare....it's such a god AWFUL time to be out of rep....:doh:


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## katorade (Aug 6, 2009)

Being treated like a goddess means I have to act like one. Fuck that noise, that shit is tiring. Who _honestly _wants to be treated like they're the most special person on Earth all the time? Who wants to feel like they can never be human and screw shit up every once in a while? I would go insane and intentionally start trying to make the guy pissed at me over something stupid just to make him stop fawning over my every move.


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## thatgirl08 (Aug 6, 2009)

katorade said:


> Being treated like a goddess means I have to act like one. Fuck that noise, that shit is tiring. Who _honestly _wants to be treated like they're the most special person on Earth all the time? Who wants to feel like they can never be human and screw shit up every once in a while? I would go insane and intentionally start trying to make the guy pissed at me over something stupid just to make him stop fawning over my every move.



Yeah, agreed. 

Not to mention, it would HAVE to get tiring being the one to constantly fawn over someone else and be responsible for something. Hence, unsustainable.


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## katorade (Aug 6, 2009)

thatgirl08 said:


> Yeah, agreed.
> 
> Not to mention, it would HAVE to get tiring being the one to constantly fawn over someone else and be responsible for something. Hence, unsustainable.



Especially if that person didn't necessarily feel the need to worship you in return. I'm not down with worshipping anybody else, so there's another point taken off.


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## mossystate (Aug 6, 2009)

thatgirl08 said:


> Not to mention, it would HAVE to get tiring being the one to constantly fawn over someone else and be responsible for something. Hence, unsustainable.



I think it is mostly........bait.


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## thatgirl08 (Aug 6, 2009)

katorade said:


> Especially if that person didn't necessarily feel the need to worship you in return. I'm not down with worshipping anybody else, so there's another point taken off.



Ha, yeah, ditto.



mossystate said:


> I think it is mostly........bait.



Probably.


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## olwen (Aug 6, 2009)

bdog said:


> Well, you can think of service like giving a gift. You feel the opposite of drained even though you're giving your time/money/love away. It's like the holidays all year! Plus, goddesses don't just receive. They also nurture.
> 
> As far as mowing the lawn goes, well, yeah, of course. I don't know anyone who wouldn't get bored being fed grapes all day, anyway.
> 
> Anyway, I'm not an expert. My friend the internet is, though.



I agree, service is a gift, but so is accepting service. Both are privileges since you can't have one without the other. But I know, that point is arguable. I don't think that I could live a 24/7 TPE myself. Even if the roles and duties are worked out to a T, sometimes you need a break from following orders or giving them. This stuff is already really intense. How much more intense does it need to get? LOL I honestly don't know how people who do the 24/7 TPE manage to keep it going....adapatability I suppose.


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## kayrae (Aug 7, 2009)

What is TPE?


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## olwen (Aug 7, 2009)

kayrae said:


> What is TPE?



Oh sorry, Total Power Exchange, and if you ask three different people about it, you'll get three different answers about what it actually is or if it's even possible. Drives me nuts actually.


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## StarWitness (Aug 7, 2009)

Olwen got there before me, and I can't delete my post. D'oh.


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## BarbBBW (Aug 7, 2009)

Green Eyed Fairy said:


> I do declare....it's such a god AWFUL time to be out of rep....:doh:



got him for ya babe!


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## olwen (Aug 7, 2009)

StarWitness said:


> Olwen got there before me, and I can't delete my post. D'oh.



Oh I caught your answer before you edited it. I liked your answer too. :happy:


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## Oirish (Aug 7, 2009)

I can definitely understand how women feel suffocated by the "worship" thrust upon them at times here. This position is such an incredible irony though. Don't misunderstand me and think that I am being crass. I just want to recognize the situational irony of being on a forum with the purpose of celebrating the larger human form for all it's beauty and being smothered by compliments from admirers. I see posts that can be a bit overzealous or downright rude from time to time and can only imagine what the barage of "compliments" or other FAn fare must be like for the ladies here. The idea that anyone owes anybody anything for their longing stares is preposterous. However, I would imagine that these things ought to be expected to some degree (I'm not approving so don't hate). This is the Internet and a site where beauty is being discussed. There are models posting photos everyday. Why would a venue affording such anonymity attract any less overzealous or creepy commentators here than any site on the net where the models are thin? Beautiful women that post photos of themselves on the Internet will be bombarded with messages of all types, whether welcome or not. I suppose it is just a fact of life and all that can really be done is to try to ignore the less savory comments and messages.


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## KHayes666 (Aug 7, 2009)

From my perspective, I've met a lot of girls that seem like they want to be treated like goddesses. The way they act, the way they feel the need to be mean to people just because they have boyfriends and on and on.

I on the other hand, see them for what they really are...human. Human's are imperfect, these same girls that people fawn over as "goddesses" will fart, shit, pee, get drunk and puke, trip and fall, have a bad hair day, forget to pay a bill and other gaffes that every single human being on earth does every day.

That doesn't mean be a dick to girls, it just means that they are no better than the men and women who want them. I respect those who respect me, and if I go on a date with a girl and she's a real sweetheart, then I wouldn't mind going out of my way to make her feel good. This doesn't mean I'd let her cheat on me or pay for every little thing she wants, but there's nothing wrong with spoiling someone a bit. 

If guys get off on treating and worshipping girls as goddesses, that's their lives and its not my place to tell them otherwise. However for me personally, I believe in mutual respect.


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## nykspree8 (Aug 7, 2009)

KHayes666 said:


> That doesn't mean be a dick to girls, it just means that they are no better than the men and women who want them. I respect those who respect me, and if I go on a date with a girl and she's a real sweetheart, then I wouldn't mind going out of my way to make her feel good. This doesn't mean I'd let her cheat on me or pay for every little thing she wants, but there's nothing wrong with spoiling someone a bit.



I totally agree!


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## superodalisque (Aug 9, 2009)

Oirish said:


> I can definitely understand how women feel suffocated by the "worship" thrust upon them at times here. This position is such an incredible irony though. Don't misunderstand me and think that I am being crass. I just want to recognize the situational irony of being on a forum with the purpose of celebrating the larger human form for all it's beauty and being smothered by compliments from admirers. I see posts that can be a bit overzealous or downright rude from time to time and can only imagine what the barage of "compliments" or other FAn fare must be like for the ladies here. The idea that anyone owes anybody anything for their longing stares is preposterous. However, I would imagine that these things ought to be expected to some degree (I'm not approving so don't hate). This is the Internet and a site where beauty is being discussed. There are models posting photos everyday. Why would a venue affording such anonymity attract any less overzealous or creepy commentators here than any site on the net where the models are thin? Beautiful women that post photos of themselves on the Internet will be bombarded with messages of all types, whether welcome or not. I suppose it is just a fact of life and all that can really be done is to try to ignore the less savory comments and messages.



i think your pretty much right about that. i just think that when people who haven't been subject to open compliments much in the real world get here they get angry when they find that there isn't much actual meaning behind the compliments other than something that seems mainly self serving.


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## KatsPyjamas (Aug 18, 2009)

katherine22 said:


> It's that the atmosphere is so oppressively charged with the one agenda of allowing the men to "worship" their "goddesses," that everything else is subsumed by that. I've never found being thought of as attractive so suffocating."



I agree with you. This atmosphere is helping me feel I can't be accept accepted or really post much on this website. I long for a place where a respectful expression of personal preferences, aesthetic appeal, sexual fantasies etc. is not confused with the actual women who inhabit these boards and this world, the whole human being, who are a whole lot more than what they look like, what they weigh. I know a lot of people here have gotten it right. But sadly there is a lot of people who don't seem to have respect for women (as opposed to their confused 'respect' for their personal ideal women, based largely on what gets them off), as much as everywhere else. Often even more so :doh:


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## lovelocs (Aug 19, 2009)

I am 33 years old. I am a beautiful, imperfect, intelligent, accomplished woman. I do not feel in any way diminished or threatened if a man honestly enjoys the sight of my body, or comments. Even if the comments are somewhat "crude." Men are often in a bind, having to express themselves to women, and having to remain true to a code of maleness which has been drilled into them since before they could talk. A man may want to sing your praises, and the only words he knows are "nice ass." If he means it out of love, we may be able to talk. 

I only mind hidden malice, or a suffocating non-curiosity about me as a person. But I've usually gotten that from teachers, "friends," and relatives who cared nothing about me as a person, but who made all the right noises. With those people, I was also just an object; an object of pity, scorn, derision or disgust, dressed up with words of love or concern. I'll take honest lust any day.


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Aug 19, 2009)

lovelocs said:


> I only mind hidden malice, or a suffocating non-curiosity about me as a person.



I like how you put that. 
Except my usual experiences with this has came mostly from "men I don't know". Funny how people's experiences differ.


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## nykspree8 (Aug 28, 2009)

lovelocs said:


> I am 33 years old. I am a beautiful, imperfect, intelligent, accomplished woman. I do not feel in any way diminished or threatened if a man honestly enjoys the sight of my body, or comments. Even if the comments are somewhat "crude." Men are often in a bind, having to express themselves to women, and having to remain true to a code of maleness which has been drilled into them since before they could talk. A man may want to sing your praises, and the only words he knows are "nice ass." If he means it out of love, we may be able to talk.



Very nice post. I don't think I would ever go up to a woman and tell her "nice ass", or "wow, you got some nice boobs!". I'm a little more tactful than that, or at least I like to think so lol...but some guys just don't know any better and that may be the best way for them to express themselves..I guess some women, like yourself, may not take a guy like that as rude, but other women would banish him to the depths of hell if they could without a second though.


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## mossystate (Aug 28, 2009)

nykspree8 said:


> Very nice post. I don't think I would ever go up to a woman and tell her "nice ass", or "wow, you got some nice boobs!". I'm a little more tactful than that, or at least I like to think so lol...but some guys just don't know any better and that may be the best way for them to express themselves..I guess some women, like yourself, may not take a guy like that as rude, but other women would banish him to the depths of hell if they could without a second though.



And the best way for some women to express themselves, is to tell the asshole to go stick it in a rusty pipe. Seriously...I do not get why you are excusing this " well, that's just how some men are, and women should teach him, or at least just take, with silence, what he dishes out, no matter how rude...poor boy " stuff. Stop. Think of the woman who is on the receiving end of the rudeness. The person dishing out the ugly...not the recipients problem.


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## nykspree8 (Aug 28, 2009)

mossystate said:


> And the best way for some women to express themselves, is to tell the asshole to go stick it in a rusty pipe. Seriously...I do not get why you are excusing this " well, that's just how some men are, and women should teach him, or at least just take, with silence, what he dishes out, no matter how rude...poor boy " stuff. Stop. Think of the woman who is on the receiving end of the rudeness. The person dishing out the ugly...not the recipients problem.



I'm not excusing it, but what can a guy do if he doesn't know any better? Maybe it is good if someone tells him to stick it in a rusty pipe, that will give him incentive to step his game up on the next girl he tries to reel in with his rico suave catch lines


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## KHayes666 (Aug 28, 2009)

nykspree8 said:


> I'm not excusing it, but what can a guy do if he doesn't know any better? Maybe it is good if someone tells him to stick it in a rusty pipe, that will give him incentive to step his game up on the next girl he tries to reel in with his rico suave catch lines










sing it with me now,...ricooooo....suaveeeee


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## mossystate (Aug 28, 2009)

nykspree8 said:


> I'm not excusing it, but what can a guy do if he doesn't know any better? Maybe it is good if someone tells him to stick it in a rusty pipe, that will give him incentive to step his game up on the next girl he tries to reel in with his rico suave catch lines



Ummmmm, wouldn't telling him that go against what you want women to do in those situations? I mean, sticking his thing in a rusty pipe...well, that would be hell for the guy, seeing how, when I think of rusty, I think of jagged edges.  See, it is not about ' game '. Any person can go through the motions. If they don't understand a reaction, and, in fact, have other men glaring at women for defending ourselves...well, there is no reason for him to truly better himself. This is not about male or female...it is about basic personality deficits. Oh, and, you did excuse it...by commenting how some women " banish him ". I bet you react pretty strongly when you are met with certain behavior. Oh, yes I doooooo bet. Next time, remember the other person, " just doesn't know any better "...breathe...smile...bless him/her...and go pick daisies. Skip, if you feel especially chipper.


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## joswitch (Aug 28, 2009)

So - question for the OP - katherine, do you feel that the protected BBW board is a place that allows escape and conversation away from this "suffocating" attention?


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## tonynyc (Aug 28, 2009)

joswitch said:


> So - question for the OP - katherine, do you feel that the protected BBW board is a place that allows escape and conversation away from this "suffocating" attention?



*Joswitch: It's all an illusion...like this bird going to the ballpark to enjoy the game....*

*Our winged friend never saw that baseball coming*


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## nykspree8 (Aug 29, 2009)

mossystate said:


> Ummmmm, wouldn't telling him that go against what you want women to do in those situations? I mean, sticking his thing in a rusty pipe...well, that would be hell for the guy, seeing how, when I think of rusty, I think of jagged edges.  See, it is not about ' game '. Any person can go through the motions. If they don't understand a reaction, and, in fact, have other men glaring at women for defending ourselves...well, there is no reason for him to truly better himself. This is not about male or female...it is about basic personality deficits. Oh, and, you did excuse it...by commenting how some women " banish him ". I bet you react pretty strongly when you are met with certain behavior. Oh, yes I doooooo bet. Next time, remember the other person, " just doesn't know any better "...breathe...smile...bless him/her...and go pick daisies. Skip, if you feel especially chipper.



Lol...sure whatever you say...why ever try to contradict or not accept what Mossy has to say? She's always right, guys! Topic resolved!


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## nykspree8 (Aug 29, 2009)

KHayes666 said:


> sing it with me now,...ricooooo....suaveeeee



LOLLL...dude that shit just cracked me the fuck up


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## mossystate (Aug 29, 2009)

nykspree8 said:


> Lol...sure whatever you say...why ever try to contradict or not accept what Mossy has to say? She's always right, guys! Topic resolved!



Oh....ummmmm...I didn't realize you were the only one allowed to say anything, and not expect replies. Gee. Ummmmm. Sorry. Don't be so pissy, just cuz I used your words and showed you how you were full of poopy. I am glad that you recognize my superior skills.:happy: I am....' other women '.


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## TraciJo67 (Aug 29, 2009)

mossystate said:


> Oh....ummmmm...I didn't realize you were the only one allowed to say anything, and not expect replies. Gee. Ummmmm. Sorry. Don't be so pissy, just cuz I used your words and showed you how you were full of poopy. I am glad that you recognize my superior skills.:happy: I am....' other women '.



I guess he's not skipping, then .


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## nykspree8 (Aug 29, 2009)

mossystate said:


> Oh....ummmmm...I didn't realize you were the only one allowed to say anything, and not expect replies. Gee. Ummmmm. Sorry. Don't be so pissy, just cuz I used your words and showed you how you were full of poopy. I am glad that you recognize my superior skills.:happy: I am....' other women '.



Oh no, you see I'm pretty convinced you are one of those women who can never be wrong, which in turn makes everyone else and their opinions wrong. So why even bother to say anything else


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## KHayes666 (Aug 29, 2009)

nykspree8 said:


> Oh no, you see I'm pretty convinced you are one of those women who can never be wrong, which in turn makes everyone else and their opinions wrong. So why even bother to say anything else


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## katorade (Aug 29, 2009)

nykspree8 said:


> Oh no, you see I'm pretty convinced you are one of those women who can never be wrong, which in turn makes everyone else and their opinions wrong. So why even bother to say anything else



Ah, the argument of someone else who most likely never thinks they're wrong accusing others of the same thing. Oh Dimensions, what a wicked web you weave.


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## nykspree8 (Aug 29, 2009)

katorade said:


> Ah, the argument of someone else who most likely never thinks they're wrong accusing others of the same thing. Oh Dimensions, what a wicked web you weave.



nah, I've admitted I've been wrong a whole 2 times in my life, and those are still up for debate :O


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## tonynyc (Aug 29, 2009)

*TIME FOR SNACKS* :happy:

*The Brew * :eat2:






*The HotDogs* :eat1:


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## katorade (Aug 29, 2009)

Tony, I challenge you to post the next 20 posts without a single picture.


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## nykspree8 (Aug 29, 2009)

But then the NFL thread would seem devoid of life


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## tonynyc (Aug 29, 2009)

katorade said:


> Tony, I challenge you to post the next 20 posts without a single picture.



LOL ... we'll see


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## tonynyc (Aug 29, 2009)

nykspree8 said:


> nah, I've admitted I've been wrong a whole 2 times in my life, and those are still up for debate :O



I'm going to take a stab at the one time in life you did make an error - it was on a Football game...


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## Carrie (Aug 29, 2009)

katorade said:


> Tony, I challenge you to post the next 20 posts without a single picture.


Heehee. I've been fighting the urge for days to ask Tony if he *just* learned how to post pictures, or what.  


Tony, thanks for being a good sport.


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## tonynyc (Aug 29, 2009)

Carrie said:


> Heehee. I've been fighting the urge for days to ask Tony if he *just* learned how to post pictures, or what.
> 
> 
> Tony, thanks for being a good sport.



*Of course Carrie and heck this thread is a whole bunch of things Crabs- Curmudgeons and Good Sports *


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## mossystate (Aug 30, 2009)

nykspree8 said:


> Oh no, you see I'm pretty convinced you are one of those women who can never be wrong, which in turn makes everyone else and their opinions wrong. So why even bother to say anything else



One of those women. * chuckle * Addressing what you said = me thinking I know everything. You are going to be very disappointed in life, if you think people are going to just nod when you walk by....very. Wait for it..................................


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## nykspree8 (Aug 30, 2009)

mossystate said:


> One of those women. * chuckle * Addressing what you said = me thinking I know everything. You are going to be very disappointed in life, if you think people are going to just nod when you walk by....very. Wait for it..................................



Actually, my post was edited b/c I don't think I had "one of those women" on there originally, and alas, what was originally said will be forever forgotten and be known only to myself and all the people who repped the original post ;P


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## tonynyc (Aug 30, 2009)

nykspree8 said:


> Actually, my post was edited b/c I don't think I had "one of those women" on there originally, and alas, what was originally said will be forever forgotten and be known only to myself and all the people who repped the original post ;P



* "We do not remember days; we remember moments". - Cesare Pavese*


*A rare & golden moment that was only witnessed by a cherished few...now if DimsLand was like Sports and had instant replay*


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## KHayes666 (Aug 31, 2009)

tonynyc said:


> * "We do not remember days; we remember moments". - Cesare Pavese*
> 
> 
> *A rare & golden moment that was only witnessed by a cherished few...now if DimsLand was like Sports and had instant replay*



lol hey now, if there's instant replay then there's gotta be Coaches Challenge. Like if I claim I never said something i get to toss a red flag to the mods so they can review if I said it or not.

So Soverysoft or Anne Marie can stand and say "After reviewing the post, the quarterback's post was clean, the ruling on the post has been overturned....the poster will not be put in time out"


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## tonynyc (Aug 31, 2009)

KHayes666 said:


> lol hey now, if there's instant replay then there's gotta be Coaches Challenge. Like if I claim I never said something i get to toss a red flag to the mods so they can review if I said it or not.
> 
> So Soverysoft or Anne Marie can stand and say "After reviewing the post, the quarterback's post was clean, the ruling on the post has been overturned....the poster will not be put in time out"



*
You might have a point there ... now how would this post have been Rated we do have our other choices along with "Time Out" "Off sides?" , "Repeat the Down?" to name a few and where the hell is the Union Rep  

*


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## KHayes666 (Aug 31, 2009)

tonynyc said:


> *
> You might have a point there ... now how would this post have been Rated we do have our other choices along with "Time Out" "Off sides?" , "Repeat the Down?" to name a few and where the hell is the Union Rep
> 
> *



lol you're the union rep...send a memo to Commissioner Conrad


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## tonynyc (Aug 31, 2009)

KHayes666 said:


> lol you're the union rep...send a memo to Commissioner Conrad



*LOL - yes and that was a Golden moment ( I think a stern memo needs to be fired off to both our lovely Mods/Refs & the Commish) I'm sure many hearts were warmed and many smiles were created * :happy:


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## exile in thighville (Aug 31, 2009)

superodalisque said:


> yep, she definitely has a point there. you might want to rethink what kind of message your sending with your screen name. until i read some of your posts i had the distinct impression that you were probably not someone who'd like to talk about substantive stuff .



why are we judging boarders before reading their posts in the first place? his name says a lot more than ffffff

anyway this thread. fantasies: live up to them


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## kayrae (Aug 31, 2009)

*ahem* I judged your screen name when I first saw it. I thought you were a woman. I don't know how this particular instance would be any different.


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## exile in thighville (Aug 31, 2009)

kayrae said:


> *ahem* I judged your screen name when I first saw it. I thought you were a woman. I don't know how this particular instance would be any different.



no one here was happy to discover i'm not a woman


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## exile in thighville (Aug 31, 2009)

kayrae said:


> *ahem* I judged your screen name when I first saw it. I thought you were a woman. I don't know how this particular instance would be any different.



no one here was happy to discover i'm not a woman

especially mini after i sucked his dick


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## nykspree8 (Sep 1, 2009)

KHayes666 said:


> lol hey now, if there's instant replay then there's gotta be Coaches Challenge. Like if I claim I never said something i get to toss a red flag to the mods so they can review if I said it or not.
> 
> So Soverysoft or Anne Marie can stand and say "After reviewing the post, the quarterback's post was clean, the ruling on the post has been overturned....the poster will not be put in time out"



So it would be something like this, but with AM or SVS standing in front of the replay booth??


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## KHayes666 (Sep 1, 2009)

nykspree8 said:


> So it would be something like this, but with AM or SVS standing in front of the replay booth??



exactly! Commissioner Conrad knows how to pick em


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## mossystate (Sep 1, 2009)

nykspree8 said:


> Actually, my post was edited b/c I don't think I had "one of those women" on there originally, and alas, what was originally said will be forever forgotten and be known only to myself and all the people who repped the original post ;P



Aw. I think it is cute that you got rep for attacking me. Had nothing to do with you, I hope you know that. :happy:


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## nykspree8 (Sep 1, 2009)

mossystate said:


> Aw. I think it is cute that you got rep for attacking me. Had nothing to do with you, I hope you know that. :happy:



Lol, it's almost like you got repped by proxy i guess


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## Tina (Sep 1, 2009)

Is it wrong that whenever I see the title of this thread I hear the voice and spoken cadence of Issac Hayes' spoken intro to the theme of "Shaft"?


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## mossystate (Sep 1, 2009)

nykspree8 said:


> Lol, it's almost like you got repped by proxy i guess



If I say what it is really like...I might get a verbal spanking, from the powers that be. 

---
Now I have Chef's salty balls on my mind.


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## mergirl (Sep 1, 2009)

Tina said:


> Is it wrong that whenever I see the title of this thread I hear the voice and spoken cadence of Issac Hayes' spoken intro to the theme of "Shaft"?



OMG YES!! hahahahahahaha.. 
That actually made a tear come out!!! 
I need to know what the end bit is though or my ocd will go off the radar..
"Does the superfat sexual goddes, the basis of male sexual imagery prevent the Priviate dick who gets all the chicks from getting..the aforementioned chicks?.................SHAFT"!
Damn right!


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## mergirl (Sep 1, 2009)

mossystate said:


> If I say what it is really like...I might get a verbal spanking, from the powers that be.
> 
> ---
> Now I have Chef's salty balls on my mind.



I'm sure the chief wont mind you saying how it really is seeing you have his salty balls on your mind!!


tee-hee ..fun with dyslexia..
SHAFT!


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## Tina (Sep 1, 2009)

My dear Lisa, you get rep for my first Dims laugh of the day. 

Can ya dig it!


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## mergirl (Sep 1, 2009)

Tina said:


> My dear Lisa, you get rep for my first Dims laugh of the day.
> 
> Can ya dig it!



I thank you


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## mossystate (Sep 1, 2009)

mergirl said:


> I'm sure the chief wont mind you saying how it really is seeing you have his salty balls on your mind!!
> 
> 
> tee-hee ..fun with dyslexia..
> SHAFT!



For some reason, my vision is all blurry today so I had to get really close to my monitor to see if I had made a mistake.

lol

You are so messed up...even more than moi...and that's saying something.


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## mergirl (Sep 1, 2009)

mossystate said:


> For some reason, my vision is all blurry today so I had to get really close to my monitor to see if I had made a mistake.
> 
> lol
> 
> You are so messed up...even more than moi...and that's saying something.



Oh dear.. better reel in my messedupness a little. I aim to be a bawhair smidgen less messed up than you always! just a bawhair smidgen mind. 
Maby this thread is giving you blurred vision...either that or something to do with the salt from those balls..
:happy:


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## mossystate (Sep 1, 2009)

mergirl said:


> Maby this thread is giving you blurred vision...either that or something to do with the salt from those balls..
> :happy:



So, perhaps I need to actually chomp down on those balls...and not just lick them for the salt? Wait, I already do that.


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## tonynyc (Sep 1, 2009)

mergirl said:


> I'm sure the chief wont mind you saying how it really is seeing you have his salty balls on your mind!!
> 
> 
> tee-hee ..fun with dyslexia..
> SHAFT!




*Time for another visual moment;but, we have to keep within the bounds of decency...  - this cute adorable pooch has graciously volunteered for this demonstration.* :bow:


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