# Chubby Chasers vs. FFA's



## FFAKAT (Sep 20, 2006)

To me there is a difference, I went on a date with a guy who is 6'4 and around 280 and use to play football, wrestle...not my typical guy I tend to go for average height and plain fat. He said that it's not that uncommon for girls to like his type. I told him that it was really uncommon and never meet anyone like me an FFA. Then we saw a guy who is about 6'0 and use to weigh 400lbs and now is like 200lb. I'm sure a good reason for him losing weight cause he couldn't find a girl who really liked the fat. So maybe my date can't comprehend this. 
That's what I didn't include was that to me there is a big difference in a girl who likes big and tall or chubby. Than somone who likes big guts and guys tits, folds and rolls.

What do ya'll think?


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## AZ_Wolf (Sep 21, 2006)

Speaking as a short guy, I'd say there's absolutely a difference. While FFAs in general might be a minority, of those, the small army is comprised of those who are all for the "tall, linebacker" type. Most of those women use the "I want to feel protected" defense. Given we don't live in caves anymore, don't let me get started there. :doh: 

So to all that, I just consider that there are two types of FFAs -- those that like fat guys, and those that still buy into society's obsession over male height, but eschews its demands on weight (I suppose not unlike a guy who might say he likes BBWs, but only extremely busty ones).


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## lemmink (Sep 21, 2006)

Yeah - I know a lot of girls who like a big, heavy guy, and a lot of guys of that 'linebacker' type who get a lot of women. Different strokes for different FFA folks, eh. (like the small, mid-size and SSBBW fans).


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## TheSadeianLinguist (Sep 21, 2006)

AZ_Wolf said:


> Speaking as a short guy, I'd say there's absolutely a difference. While FFAs in general might be a minority, of those, the small army is comprised of those who are all for the "tall, linebacker" type. Most of those women use the "I want to feel protected" defense. Given we don't live in caves anymore, don't let me get started there. :doh:
> 
> So to all that, I just consider that there are two types of FFAs -- those that like fat guys, and those that still buy into society's obsession over male height, but eschews its demands on weight (I suppose not unlike a guy who might say he likes BBWs, but only extremely busty ones).



I agree with a lot of your post. Of course, sometimes preferences are just that: Preferences. I like taller men and women. I also like dark hair and eyes, and small breasts, and Roman noses. I don't know why.

I think when women pull the, "I want to feel protected," thing, I think they're referring to enjoying the heterosexual process of being "done to." It's a very feminizing feeling to be explored and worshipped by someone much larger/capable of crushing you. It requires a greater level of trust. I've never dated a woman stronger than I was. When wrestling about with my boyfriend a few weeks ago, I realized it's very EMPOWERING that he doesn't shake me off like a flea. There's about a hundred lb. weight difference and a foot of height. 

I don't think there's anything wrong with a person liking an ideal body, as long as they're following THEIR desires. I do get bothered when people who are nice and sexually attractive get passed up for not fitting in the societal norm.


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## lucyp (Sep 21, 2006)

*blink, blink, blink*
...wait a minute. I'm new here. Hold on. 

Is there a particular weight number or something that separates those who are 'merely chubby chasers' from those who are 'proper fat admirers'?

Would this be sort of like the way that decades ago that 'true feminists' thought that those women interested in equal pay for the same job but who also wanted to get married and wear lipstick weren't 'real feminists'?

Or the way that some in the BDSM community who are into blood play and exciting things with electricity think that those who merely like a little light spanking and some fluffy handcuffs are sort of cowardly and amateur?

Please tell me it's not like that here. Divisiveness between those who have so much in common and such similiar goals always makes me sad.


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## AZ_Wolf (Sep 21, 2006)

TheSadeianLinguist said:


> I agree with a lot of your post. Of course, sometimes preferences are just that: Preferences. I like taller men and women. I also like dark hair and eyes, and small breasts, and Roman noses. I don't know why.
> 
> I think when women pull the, "I want to feel protected," thing, I think they're referring to enjoying the heterosexual process of being "done to." It's a very feminizing feeling to be explored and worshipped by someone much larger/capable of crushing you. It requires a greater level of trust. I've never dated a woman stronger than I was. When wrestling about with my boyfriend a few weeks ago, I realized it's very EMPOWERING that he doesn't shake me off like a flea. There's about a hundred lb. weight difference and a foot of height.
> 
> I don't think there's anything wrong with a person liking an ideal body, as long as they're following THEIR desires. I do get bothered when people who are nice and sexually attractive get passed up for not fitting in the societal norm.



Heh. Maybe it's good that you don't know me, so you can brush off my reply as flighty. All I can do is laugh, having read it. Not offended since you replied honestly, just used to hearing it.


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## TheSadeianLinguist (Sep 21, 2006)

I wasn't brushing you off. I'm not sure I'm clear on your last reply. Are you saying cultural preferences are so deeply entrenched in our brains that everyone who likes anything standard is a dummy buying into the game? I hope not!


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## AZ_Wolf (Sep 21, 2006)

Not at all. But those who rebel openly against certain cultural norms, defining who they are by that action, then wrap themselves around others (as some in the FFA community do), deserve mocking, at the least.


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## TheSadeianLinguist (Sep 21, 2006)

Ahhh. Now we're getting somewhere I understand. So you take offense at posers?


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## SisterGoldenHair (Sep 21, 2006)

well, i've been into guys of the linebacker type, but i've also been into guys that were decidedly not that type. i do like tallness but it's not an essential feature. pretty much all forms of "big" are good by me.


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## Laina (Sep 21, 2006)

lucyp said:


> *blink, blink, blink*
> ...wait a minute. I'm new here. Hold on.
> 
> Is there a particular weight number or something that separates those who are 'merely chubby chasers' from those who are 'proper fat admirers'?
> ...



There are snobs in every community, just as there are those with persecution complexes, those with superiority complexes...and then there's me. God complex. Definitely. Welcome to the mad house. ;-)

Seriously, though, yeah. You'll run across one or two close-minded people who get upset because you have a type--after all, we're about acceptance, which OBVIOUSLY means you can't have a preference!  The majority of people, however, understand that personal preference is just that--something you, personally, prefer.


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## Laina (Sep 21, 2006)

AZ_Wolf said:


> Not at all. But those who rebel openly against certain cultural norms, defining who they are by that action, then wrap themselves around others (as some in the FFA community do), deserve mocking, at the least.



So in other words, an FFA who prefers tall, fat guys is mock-worthy?

I guess I don't follow.

Then again, I never felt societal pressure to date a tall guy--my father is 5'5 (a whole inch taller than me!) and my mother 5'10. My boyfriend is 6'0...but the guy before him was 5'6. Do I have a tendency to date guys taller than me? Certainly...which may be (mainly) because at 5'4, there aren't many guys around me who happen to be shorter. "Taller than me" is not a definite criteria--it's just something that happens.


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## lucyp (Sep 21, 2006)

Laina said:


> There are snobs in every community, just as there are those with persecution complexes, those with superiority complexes...and then there's me. God complex. Definitely. Welcome to the mad house. ;-)
> 
> Seriously, though, yeah. You'll run across one or two close-minded people who get upset because you have a type--after all, we're about acceptance, which OBVIOUSLY means you can't have a preference!  The majority of people, however, understand that personal preference is just that--something you, personally, prefer.



*sigh of relief* Okay. Good to know. Thanks. =)


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## Dibaby35 (Sep 21, 2006)

Although I prefer guys 6 foot and taller..I never find those ones for some odd reason. I'm not gonna just not date someone cause they are shorter than me. Although it would be nice to find one that just happened to be tall too..LOL. I always feel like King Kong...roarrrr. I'm sure some woman like that its just not my thing. 

Yeah the protection thing is a biggee for woman. I still believe that men and woman do have roles to play and sorry men...you gotta protect our butts. My ex-husband told me one time that if I ever got into trouble I was on my own ><..hence why the ex part.


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## AZ_Wolf (Sep 21, 2006)

Laina said:


> So in other words, an FFA who prefers tall, fat guys is mock-worthy?



Not at all. But someone who, IMO, is, might go around saying something like, for example, "Society says I should like a guy with six-pack abs. I say, to hell with what society programs us to like! I'm my own person, I'm a rebel! ...but make sure the guy is tall!"  

But for anyone in general, sure, preferences are preferences. For example, I like thinner FFAs. For me, the contrast in figures is a turn on (and an increasingly obvious contrast as I'd gain weight while we were together). But height is completely irrelevant for me. It'd be quite refreshing to find someone who felt the same for a change.


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## Slowfuse (Sep 21, 2006)

My two cents on chubby-chasers vs. FFA's. If the lady wants me and enjoys being with me, she can call herself Marvin the Martian for all I care. To each their own. I can't stand skinny women. Which doesn't mean there's anything "wrong" with them, just my personal preference. We each have our own personal tastes. And I think most of the ladies here are absolute goddess! lol


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## HDANGEL15 (Sep 21, 2006)

FFAKAT said:


> To me there is a difference, I went on a date with a guy who is 6'4 and around 280 and use to play football, wrestle...not my typical guy I tend to go for average height and plain fat. He said that it's not that uncommon for girls to like his type. I told him that it was really uncommon and never meet anyone like me an FFA. Then we saw a guy who is about 6'0 and use to weigh 400lbs and now is like 200lb. I'm sure a good reason for him losing weight cause he couldn't find a girl who really liked the fat. So maybe my date can't comprehend this.
> That's what I didn't include was that to me there is a big difference in a girl who likes big and tall or chubby. Than somone who likes big guts and guys tits, folds and rolls.
> 
> What do ya'll think?



*i hate all the acronyms and *NAMES*....me...i always was very attracted to men BIGGER THEN ME....i am only 5 feet tall...and 130..so thats not a big deal..but men 2-3x me..wow...amazing...and a man thats relatively average ..or a little chunky..well......if he were to learn of my *FETISH* and actually buy into it..like the guy i am seeing now..that could be *NIRVANA** :smitten:


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## Amandy (Sep 21, 2006)

I don't see it as a divisiveness issue, or something in conflict, but just the natural variance in what each person finds attractive. 

I know a good-looking 'linebacker' type would turn the heads of more than half of my friends. But a good-looking 'heavier than that' guy with more fat/rolls/moobs/belly hang, etc will make me gawk in a way that they cannot relate. Well? So be it. I don't agree that you can necessarily pinpont with a terminology, but there is a difference.

And vive le difference


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## TheSadeianLinguist (Sep 21, 2006)

AZ_Wolf said:


> Not at all. But someone who, IMO, is, might go around saying something like, for example, "Society says I should like a guy with six-pack abs. I say, to hell with what society programs us to like! I'm my own person, I'm a rebel! ...but make sure the guy is tall!"
> 
> But for anyone in general, sure, preferences are preferences. For example, I like thinner FFAs. For me, the contrast in figures is a turn on (and an increasingly obvious contrast as I'd gain weight while we were together). But height is completely irrelevant for me. It'd be quite refreshing to find someone who felt the same for a change.



Well, but that's a very standard feeling for heterosexual men to not worry about the height of their partners. Dating a 5' woman is no worse than dating a 5' 5" woman. Saying, "I like slim women," is just as stereotypical and societally bending as saying, "I like tall men." 

Part of being an individual means recognizing that in some ways, you're very much responsive to common human desires and the media. You're saying you like a standard woman and you're criticizing women for the same thing. See where that's a trifle hypocritical?


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## Laina (Sep 23, 2006)

TheSadeianLinguist said:


> Well, but that's a very standard feeling for heterosexual men to not worry about the height of their partners. Dating a 5' woman is no worse than dating a 5' 5" woman. Saying, "I like slim women," is just as stereotypical and societally bending as saying, "I like tall men."
> 
> Part of being an individual means recognizing that in some ways, you're very much responsive to common human desires and the media. You're saying you like a standard woman and you're criticizing women for the same thing. See where that's a trifle hypocritical?



I was trying to find a way to say exactly this without sounding bitchy. Thank you!

I feel like a broken record saying this, but personal preferences are just that: personal. Yes, everyone is affected in some way, shape, or form by their environment. This applies, however, to every fetish, preference and turn on across the board. Obviously it's not always "society told me to", but there's an influence from society in everything. The environment gives you signals. Your biology tells you how to act on them. The combination of the two is precisely what makes our desires so individual.

And then there's the fallback argument: if someone isn't attracted to you, moaning at them that they're merely a product of society isn't going to help your case. It's just going to annoy them (and make them less likely to keep talking to you). Any connection you might have made in spite of their more superficial feelings will be lost. But hey, you'll still walk away feeling morally superior.


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## GordoNegro (Sep 23, 2006)

I just think preferences are not a sin as there is someone out there for everyone.


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## FreneticFangs (Sep 28, 2006)

FFAKAT said:


> To me there is a difference, I went on a date with a guy who is 6'4 and around 280 and use to play football, wrestle...not my typical guy I tend to go for average height and plain fat. He said that it's not that uncommon for girls to like his type. I told him that it was really uncommon and never meet anyone like me an FFA. Then we saw a guy who is about 6'0 and use to weigh 400lbs and now is like 200lb. I'm sure a good reason for him losing weight cause he couldn't find a girl who really liked the fat. So maybe my date can't comprehend this.
> That's what I didn't include was that to me there is a big difference in a girl who likes big and tall or chubby. Than somone who likes big guts and guys tits, folds and rolls.
> 
> What do ya'll think?


My bf weighs more than 300 lbs. Just because I don't dig "guys tits" and "folds", I'm not an FFA? 

I think... just because he played football, girls can be "ok" with dating an "athletic chunky" type. Maybe their focus is on his height and strength... and not on his belly.
I know I'd be happy about all three


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## William (Sep 29, 2006)

Hi 

I always think of BHM as the compliment of BBW or simply a Fat Man. Not a chubby/chunky guy or former football player.

Fat Guys often have fat qualities like bell rolls, bigger butts/thighs, fat backs and man boobs. I thought that was what is board was about?

William





FreneticFangs said:


> My bf weighs more than 300 lbs. Just because I don't dig "guys tits" and "folds", I'm not an FFA?
> 
> I think... just because he played football, girls can be "ok" with dating an "athletic chunky" type. Maybe their focus is on his height and strength... and not on his belly.
> I know I'd be happy about all three


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## Kiki (Sep 29, 2006)

I thought any woman who preferred some kind of meatiness on a man, be it just a bit of chub to super size was an FFA and then that would mean that every size of BHM would get some kind of admiration from the various women here. And now we're not allowed to be attracted by height. This is yet again another instance where people are going to get upset because they don't fit someone's preference and they misconstrue it as the person with the preference being discrinminatory. So now FFAs can't have weight OR height preferences?! If all FFAs only liked one weight and height that would probably only apply to one or two men and would have the rest of you moaning that we're leaving you out. At least with individual personal preferences, every BHM would be at least one girl's preference. You need to stop taking 'preference' so personally.


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## BigFusionNYC (Sep 29, 2006)

There are no "Chubby-Chasers" or FFA's here in my neck of the woods, and it's not because of my lack of trying to find one. Hell I'll even settle for one of the "Fat Tolerant" women.


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## estrata (Sep 29, 2006)

I'll just say it really bugs me when, at 6'3", shorter guys who dig taller women get all offended that I won't go out with them. I have had this quite a few times, where my preference for men being my height is somehow giving into social expectations whereas theyre preference for taller women is somehow respectable, like I should be grateful they find me attractive and leave it at that?

I feel this is a problem many BHMs have as well. Many people want to have an equal relationship, where both feel protected by the other. So I can totally understand when BHMs feel annoyed that the women who go after them just want to feel protected, and not do any of the protecting. I feel that, outside of the bedroom, a relationship needs to be equal to work. However, if that need to feel protected remains in the bedroom, and is not just a general desire to be coddled through life, I dont see why it shouldnt work like any other preference. However, I also understand when some BHMs get annoyed that all the girls just seem to want to be protected. Being big doesnt automatically equal wanting to be dominant!

Me, I like my men really nice and squishy. Though I suppose the linebacker type is better than nothing!


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## William (Sep 29, 2006)

Hi Estrata

I do not think that I would want to date a woman taller than me (but who knows if the right lady came around), but I do find Tall Women attractive.

I think that everyone wants a relationship where they are wanted and appreciated. 

Of all the on-line places in Fat Acceptance, I come here because I know Fat Men are appreciated.

William





estrata said:


> I'll just say it really bugs me when, at 6'3", shorter guys who dig taller women get all offended that I won't go out with them. I have had this quite a few times, where my preference for men being my height is somehow giving into social expectations whereas theyre preference for taller women is somehow respectable, like I should be grateful they find me attractive and leave it at that?
> 
> I feel this is a problem many BHMs have as well. Many people want to have an equal relationship, where both feel protected by the other. So I can totally understand when BHMs feel annoyed that the women who go after them just want to feel protected, and not do any of the protecting. I feel that, outside of the bedroom, a relationship needs to be equal to work. However, if that need to feel protected remains in the bedroom, and is not just a general desire to be coddled through life, I dont see why it shouldnt work like any other preference. However, I also understand when some BHMs get annoyed that all the girls just seem to want to be protected. Being big doesnt automatically equal wanting to be dominant!
> 
> Me, I like my men really nice and squishy. Though I suppose the linebacker type is better than nothing!


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## FFAKAT (Sep 29, 2006)

I agree with William "Fat Guys often have fat qualities like bell rolls, bigger butts/thighs, fat backs and man boobs. I thought that was what is board was about?"

When i first came to this board, almost a decade ago..thatw what i thought a place for women that like fat men. I just never could relate or have any similarities to women that liked chubby or big and tall. To me that type of girl was too accepted by society and just defiantly not me.

Also, I don't look for a fat guy guy to be a "protector" or "dominant"...I'm the dominant one in the relationship!

Also the guy I'm seeing(mentioned previously) use to be 350 and lost 100lbs or so. So kinda weird dating an x-fat guy...thats a future thread


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## Tad (Oct 4, 2006)

Amongst those males that profess to the description FA there are some who love big women, that is they love the sheer size of some women, typically very tall BBW. However most love fat women. That is, they are attracted to the woman's fatness, and her size is either irrelevent, or only of minor positive or negative significance. (Yes, some love fat but aren't crazy about the sheer size that comes with it). Obviously there is some overlap, but those looking for BBW Amazons are considered a small sub-set of the whole group.

Amongst women I get the feeling that the big-admirers are if anything more common than the fat-admirers. Again there is overlap. But imagine two guys, each 5'10 and 300 pounds. One has broad shoulders, and is built like a barrel--big all over, maybe biggest in the middle, but mostly he is a bigger, wider guy. The other has somewhat slighter shoulders, jiggly man boobs, that rest on his large stomach, which is flanked by thick but soft love handles that wrap around to become rolls of fat on his back--big, but with much more emphatic fatness. Which one would you consider more attractive?

Whichever choice, I'm just glad that you are choosing one of them over the cut jock over there, or the starving artist off in the corner  Obviously most guys will tend to appreciate most the type that is most attracted to them, but there will be exceptions. I seem to recall one guy complaining that he always attracted the women who liked the linebacker type, while he wanted to become really fat and flabby, and that didn't appeal to those women at all.

For the record, I don't think I fit into either class all that well, but I accepted long ago that eye-candy was never going to be one of my strong suits, no matter who the beholder is! I think this sort of thing is more stressful on those guys still hoping to find a woman who is gaga over his body in the same way that he is gaga over some women's bodies, but I think fewer women have this strong a response to any particular physique--although some obviously do, and some guys don't.

Regards;

-Ed


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## estrata (Oct 4, 2006)

"slighter shoulders, jiggly man boobs, that rest on his large stomach"

Yummy. The more apron the better, says I!


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