# How do you feel about your stomach? Do you wear long blouses to cover it up?



## Tina (Jan 16, 2006)

Used to be, when I bought a blouse, it had to cover my stomach and bum. I guess that I somehow felt that it was slimming. However, I can see in pictures that those blouses actually made me look bigger in some ways. Those years ago, part of me, the less evolved part, also felt that I was sparing people from having to see what they might find repulsive, and also maybe cutting down on the chance of possible negative comments. 

After that, when I had gained a better self-perception, I still continued wearing the big shirts and the like simply because I was used to it.

These days -- days where I get many more smiles than negative comments, I do keep my stomach covered in the sense that I don't expose skin, but I don't feel like my blouse has to be long enough to hide my lower attributes, front and back. I look at it like the comedienne Thea Vidale does "honey, I weigh 300 pounds, I'm gonna look fat!" and I'm fine with that. So, most of my blouses generally hit midway between my waist and the bottom of my belly, and generally, they 'hide' nothing of my bum. And you know, since dressing this way I feel better about myself -- way better -- than when I was covering up.

What's your style and story?


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## Jane (Jan 16, 2006)

Sounds correct, Tina. I've changed the way I dress in the last couple of years. Except I still love huge peasant/hippie/gauze tunics. I would rather wear them than anything. Light material, blows in the Oklahoma wind.


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## loves2laugh (Jan 16, 2006)

hi tina
my story is similar to yours. recently, actually since i have been gaining more confidence being part of dimensions, i have been comfortable enough to wear tops that dont necessarily cover my butt and may not be too loose around the belly. i have been told that i looked thinner- now i go sleeveless in the summer! soon it might be short shorts! hahahahahahahahaha

ingrid


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## Donna (Jan 16, 2006)

Wear them all the time (long blouses). And it's dumb, I know, because it makes me look even shorter than I already am. But still I do it. For all the confidence I have managed to gain, I still have my quirks and that's one of them.


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## AnnMarie (Jan 16, 2006)

I have a couple of longer tops, but they're styled that way (example 1) and it's not a purchase I made to hide anything. It's a fitted shirt, just happens to be a longer style. 

More often than not I wear tanks, shrugs, or waist length (a bit longer so they don't ride up on me, the upper belly tends to do that to me sometimes depending on the shirt) shirts, some sweaters (but they fit as they should). I don't like anything that's super big or hangy because it definately just makes you look bigger than you are, or shorter than you are, and it tends to look like you're trying to hide or fade away... and I'm not. 

I used to be a leggings and long sweaters/shirts girl (LONG time ago), and I have no clue what I was thinking. I was just hiding in the only way I knew, but never with any forethought. I think it was just comfortable and comforting to think I was disguising anything from the masses. 

Kidding myself on every level, I was. I'm a huge fat girl, and there is no hiding that from anyone. I can't hide my ass or belly or legs in a tent, I can't hide my super sized upper arms in a sleeve, it's just as big in or out. I dress for me, for comfort in my own head, and to look good. I love finding cute, trendy, appropriate pieces for me, and dress my body how it should be. Not to hide it, not to disguise it, not to "fool the eye", but to do it the justice it deserves... it's a pleasure in my life. 

View attachment shirt01.jpg


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## Tina (Jan 16, 2006)

I've admired that blouse whenever I see it on you, AM, the Mod styling is great. Where did you get it?


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## Zandoz (Jan 16, 2006)

Ummmm...I think my wife would be upset if I wore one of her blouses.


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## Miss Vickie (Jan 16, 2006)

That is a GORGEOUS blouse. It makes me wish I was more into the mod style for myself, but I just don't think I can give up the hippie dippie earth mama thing just yet. But if there ever was a blouse that could do it, THAT would be the one.

I used to be pretty self conscious about my belly and always wore long, loose, fairly unconstructed tops that came LONG on me. Fortunately, since I'm short, this was easy to accomplish. It's kind of silly if you think about it; like it wasn't obvious that I had a belly. Who'd I think I was fooling? Lately, though, I've been wearing tighter shirts, and lately bought a couple of fairly short corduroy jackets that I wear with jeans. I think they look pretty good, actually. It's silly, because I know I probably would have looked fine in those things before, but it took dropping a little weight for me to be brave enough to wear something shorter than tunic length. DUMB! :doh:


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## xoxoshelby (Jan 16, 2006)

yep, i admit it. Only the long shirts for me. In fact when I moved I gave away all of my shirts that I didn't think were long enough...I gave them to my best friends wife who will wear anything. Oh well, I guess it's all in my head, but I can't help it.


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## AnnMarie (Jan 16, 2006)

Tina said:


> I've admired that blouse whenever I see it on you, AM, the Mod styling is great. Where did you get it?



igigi  I have it in both colors. LOL


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## BBW Betty (Jan 16, 2006)

I've worn the long blouses a lot, too. At first, it was to hide the bulges. But I've also never been comfortable with too much skin hanging out--over-the top modesty, I guess.

However, I have always enjoyed wearing shorts in the summer, and sleeveless or tank tops in summer. As long as it's not too binding or anything. Comfort, all the way, baby.


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## Tina (Jan 16, 2006)

Vickie, I'll bet your look stunning in your jeans and jacket. But then, you've always been beautiful, no matter your size. :wubu: 



AnnMarie said:


> igigi  I have it in both colors. LOL



Oh, I should have known; I love their clothing. Lucky girl.


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## Miss Vickie (Jan 16, 2006)

Tina said:


> Vickie, I'll bet your look stunning in your jeans and jacket. But then, you've always been beautiful, no matter your size. :wubu:



Shhhhh. People will talk.  :wubu:


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## Tina (Jan 16, 2006)

Let them.


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## ValentineBBW (Jan 16, 2006)

I am guilty of wearing long blouses to cover my hips, butt and belly and I've only worn shorts maybe 3 times in public past the age of 8 and each time was around other fat folk. My legs are very heavy with lots of redness and bumps and I'm more comfortable wearing pants. I don't wear anything sleeveless either. I am like Betty, I don't like anything binding and I like comfort. I'm working on getting away from the long flowing blouses and start wearing better fitting/flattering items. I just don't have the fashion eye.


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## Miss Vickie (Jan 16, 2006)

Tina said:


> Let them.



You naughty, naughty girl! I love it!


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## Tina (Jan 16, 2006)

Valentine, maybe it just takes trying on lots of things before you see what really suits you. For instance, I do not look good, at all, in man-tailored type of clothes. Nor in really ruffly stuff, either. I look good in gently structured clothing, from Mod to bohemian to elegant, that flatters my curves but doesn't try to contain them (good luck there, anyway!). Go to a store, during off hours, where they have varying clothing in your size. Talk to the manager and tell her what you're trying to do, and see if she can bring you various kinds of outfits in your size so you can see what style really looks good on you. Bring a friend for feedback if you like. Then, in the future, you can stick with that kind of style, if you feel you don't have a flair for putting random stuff together.

And Vick: :kiss2: Naughtiness is in my genes. Or jeans, as the case may be...


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## Miss Vickie (Jan 16, 2006)

ValentineBBW said:


> I am guilty of wearing long blouses to cover my hips, butt and belly and I've only worn shorts maybe 3 times in public past the age of 8 and each time was around other fat folk. My legs are very heavy with lots of redness and bumps and I'm more comfortable wearing pants. I don't wear anything sleeveless either. I am like Betty, I don't like anything binding and I like comfort. I'm working on getting away from the long flowing blouses and start wearing better fitting/flattering items. I just don't have the fashion eye.



You know, one of the things I hate about that show "What Not to Wear" is the implied -- actually, it's stated -- judgment of people's fashion sense. The last comment in your post reminded me of that, and the self inflicted judgment we impose. My question is: Do you like how you dress? Do you love -- or at least like -- at least some of the clothes you wear? If so, then I think you do have a fashion eye. Just because it's not the same as some hoity toity big city fashionista doesn't mean you don't know what works on you. I think what it takes for many of us is being brave enough to try new things. 

As much as I hate to admit it, my wearing tighter clothes was something that was inspired by "What Not to Wear". They've had a couple of shows where there were plus size women who were the ones being "fixed up". And they agreed -- it is tough finding stuff out there in our sizes (yay!) But they also had some great ideas -- with examples -- about how wearing the looser stuff doesn't do what we want it to do (hide our "foibles" or make them less visible) but rather diminishes from those things we have going for us and actually make us look bigger. I didn't believe it until I'd watched two or three shows along that theme, and then I tried it. And damned if they weren't right! I look far more curvy, sexy (and yes, smaller) in a cute, short, properly fitting corduroy jacket over a tank top and hip hugger jeans than I ever did in the unconstructed, flowy stretch cotton shirts and "mama jeans" I used to wear. It's weird, but it's so true. And we're so afraid of letting others see our bodies that we actually probably add to our perceived weight (and take away from our attractivenes) by the too loose (often too big) clothes we wear.

That being said, though, I personally think that if you like wearing large, flowy shirts then you should wear them. If they look good to you, then you'll feel better wearing them and will look better to others in the bargain. 

Anyway, this is just the opinion of a chick that no one would ever accuse of being fashionable. I just think we should wear what we want and what we think looks and feels good. (That being said, you'll never ever get me into anything sleeveless. Not because I care what others think, but because I really don't like how my arms look. They're like my achilles heel or something).

Here's an example of me in a tight fitting sheer shirt with a little shrug over it. It's something I'd never have worn a year ago because "You can see my back fat!" But I think it's quite fetching.







This is me in a longer jacket than the one I was talking about, but it's fitting, and the jeans are also formed to fit my thighs and butt -- not skin tight, but tight enough that you can tell I have legs under there. 






I wish I had pictures of how I used to dress, but sadly, I hated having my picture taken so there aren't too many around.


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## Miss Vickie (Jan 16, 2006)

Tina said:


> And Vick: :kiss2: Naughtiness is in my genes. Or jeans, as the case may be...



Oh darlin', let's not go there. Or perhaps, we should. 

(What was that about flirting???? Hee.)


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## fatlane (Jan 16, 2006)

Dude, I'm all about the long flowing tops. It's one of the reasons I like looking at fat women... the flow of the fabric and the barely-contained mystery. It's beautiful when done right and worn confidently.


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## AnnMarie (Jan 16, 2006)

I agree with much of what you said there Vickie, but looking back on the things I used to wear... I liked them, and I thought I looked good. I didn't, and there was no way for me to know that without examples of how to look better (much like you've mentioned, you have to see it). That's not saying that other women don't, but for me, it wasn't flattering at all, and didn't make best use of any of my natural curves (of course, since I was hiding them all under circus tent shirts).

I don't think anyone needs to be hoity toity or a fashionista by any means - you're totally right on that, trends are just that. But, there are still basic rules that help people wear their clothes better, and can give them confidence in them. I think it's great if people read threads like this and push themselves to start out with one shirt that really fits as it should and just wear it at home, get comfortable - then maybe trying wearing it out with people or in a place that makes you feel at ease. 

I just want ladies to give themselves more credit, and give it all a shot. If it never feels right, then go back to whatever you do best in, but I think most are surprised when they make a change which is generally perceived by others as "for the better" because it really makes them feel more confident in what they wear and how they look.


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## Tina (Jan 16, 2006)

I think you're right, Vickie, and it's an important point that if Valentine is happy with her look, then who cares? But if not, one doesn't have to be born with an artistic eye, it can be developed.

I love those pics of you, honey, and what a fabulous jacket.


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## AnnMarie (Jan 16, 2006)

Tina said:


> Nor in really ruffly stuff, either.



Oh God, I look HORRID in ruffles, anything ruffly around my neck/chest.... eeek, it's a site.


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## Tina (Jan 16, 2006)

Isn't it awful. And really, do you think ANYONE looks good in that stuff? I can't imagine it.


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## fatlane (Jan 16, 2006)

Tina said:


> Isn't it awful. And really, do you think ANYONE looks good in that stuff? I can't imagine it.



No. Ruffles are bad. Pirate shirts only look good on pirates, and that's after all the ruffley stuff has been hacked off in combat.


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## ValentineBBW (Jan 16, 2006)

Tina and Miss Vickie: Thanks to both of you for your advice, I greatly appreciate it. I think you're right, if you feel most comfortable and it works for you, screw the fashion guru. I just want to find something new to add to my wardrobe that is attractive and flattering so I'm going to step out of my comfort zone and try something new. I wish I had a local store I could go and try things on but there aren't any stores around me that carry my size. I'm limited catalog/internet ordering unfortunately but thank goodness there are some good choices.

Thanks girls, I'll take any advice/help I can get.


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## mybluice (Jan 16, 2006)

I am smaller on top than on bottom, so to buy a shirt big enough to cover my backside I would always be swimming in it up top. I finally decided this wasn't a good look for me as it made me look even bigger than I was. I started buying my tops to fit right and I even wear them tucked in now too! I got to the point where I figured I'm a bbw, you can tell I'm a bbw, so why am I trying to hide it and I absolutely don't do stretch pants. I have to say one of my favorite buys this winter was an offwhite angoria sweater (don't tuck it) and a cropped jean jacket with faux fur trim. I'm not quite to the point of wearing tank tops (mostly because I don't like my arms), but I will get there I am sure. I do believe it helped me having a guy that I like tell me how hot I look as it boosted my self esteem. I don't have a lot of money to spend on myself, so when I do get to buy something I always make sure it's 1) something I'm comfortable in 2) something I look good in and 3) something I will be wearing more than a couple of times. 

View attachment Jean Jacket.jpg


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## jamie (Jan 16, 2006)

Ah...myblueice, he was right...you surely are hot. Gorgeous pic!

I am so disproportionate from the top to the bottom, that I did the same thing and bought big tops so that they fit around my hips too and were way too big in the shoulders, bust, etc. I just looked like one big ball walking around. I figured I like the way my waist dipped in and hips curved out, so I started wearing tops that hit me right at waist level.

I am kind of a tomboy and spend a lot of my day plopped in front of my computer working out designs and projects, so I have a lot of button-ups and khakis outfits, but if it is somewhere other than work, I tend to dress in clothing that fit their areas pretty closely.

I hope this post makes sense, I took a muscle relaxer for my back. .


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## mybluice (Jan 16, 2006)

Thank you Jamie!!! I have to say being told about dimensions last January has been the best experience for me. I am meeting some wonderful people who are beautiful each in their own way. It is a great community and the support it awesome. I just wished I had known about it years ago. I think the sweater I'm wearing in the pic is the longest top I have


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## Ceres (Jan 16, 2006)

well frankly my dear...i don't give a darn...of what peoples think how i get dressed...i'll wear shorts and tops if i feel like,i 'll wear a mini skirt and low cut sweaters if i want...i weight 260 lbs...i got a nice butt and nice boobs...so why hide it?and believe me..i got plenty of looks to my cleavage by guys that are with skinny chicks...i also wear braless tops..i wear whatever makes me feel sexy and beautiful and hubby appreciate it a lotbut again..that's me..a chick that smoke the pipe(with tobacco...not something else),that appreciate a solderer as a gift,that like to fix things around the house altough my hubby does it now...but also a chick that make hand made jewelry,and like to wear a nice lipstick and wear shiny classy thingsCeres


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## Sandie_Zitkus (Jan 16, 2006)

Not anymore. I weear what I like if people don't like it they don't have to look. I dress to please me and my husband. And since Wayne is a belly man - he likes how I look in shorter shirts.


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## bigsexy920 (Jan 16, 2006)

at my height its hard to find something long enough to cover the goodies . I will usually wear a shorter tighter shirt then something lose and a little longet on top. I say if it looks nice long or short wear it


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## Jes (Jan 17, 2006)

fatlane said:


> Dude, I'm all about the long flowing tops. It's one of the reasons I like looking at fat women... the flow of the fabric and the barely-contained mystery. It's beautiful when done right and worn confidently.



well, when you're a woman (I'm assuming you're not), then you can wear as many as you'd like!


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## FitChick (Jan 17, 2006)

I don't have much of a real belly anymore, but I do have gobs and gobs of loose skin (from weight loss). I try to buy bigger panties so I can tuck the skin into the panties...but then it oozes out throuigh the panty legholes. Very attractive (NOT!)


If you have a REAL belly, BE PROUD of it!


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## LillyBBBW (Jan 17, 2006)

I wear long blouses/tops almost exclusively. For some reason exposing my belly feels the same to me as exposing my cleavage if that makes any sense. It seems conservative to keep it discreetly covered rather than letting it be exposed unless it's the weekend and I'm out shopping or muddling around. When someone keeps staring at my cleavage it makes me self conscious. I've had the same happen with my belly which gives me the same icky feeling. Another kind of insecurity I guess> When eyes are darting up towards the top of my head I will reach up there to see if there's bird crap or lint there. I'm a bundle of nerves about this kind of thing.


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## Jane (Jan 17, 2006)

LillyBBBW said:


> I wear long blouses/tops almost exclusively. For some reason exposing my belly feels the same to me as exposing my cleavage if that makes any sense. It seems conservative to keep it discreetly covered rather than letting it be exposed unless it's the weekend and I'm out shopping or muddling around. When someone keeps staring at my cleavage it makes me self conscious. I've had the same happen with my belly which gives me the same icky feeling. Another kind of insecurity I guess> When eyes are darting up towards the top of my head I will reach up there to see if there's bird crap or lint there. I'm a bundle of nerves about this kind of thing.


Lily, the cleavage thing used to bother me, but I've got a friend who stares right down you cleavage. I'm so used to it now, I don't even notice.


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## Tina (Jan 17, 2006)

Jane, have you tried putting a little diorama in there so said friend at least has something different to look at each time?

Lilly, a friend of mine had a button that said something like, "you'll have to talk louder, my breasts are deaf." People who stare like that are rude.


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## FitChick (Jan 17, 2006)

LillyBBBW said:


> I wear long blouses/tops almost exclusively. For some reason exposing my belly feels the same to me as exposing my cleavage if that makes any sense. It seems conservative to keep it discreetly covered rather than letting it be exposed unless it's the weekend and I'm out shopping or muddling around. When someone keeps staring at my cleavage it makes me self conscious. I've had the same happen with my belly which gives me the same icky feeling. Another kind of insecurity I guess> When eyes are darting up towards the top of my head I will reach up there to see if there's bird crap or lint there. I'm a bundle of nerves about this kind of thing.



I have always felt the same way (exposing bellybutton is like exposing cleavage)....I always attributed it to my religious upbringing (Orthodox Judaism), but maybe its more common than I realized?


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## Jane (Jan 17, 2006)

Tina said:


> Jane, have you tried putting a little diorama in there so said friend at least has something different to look at each time?
> 
> Lilly, a friend of mine had a button that said something like, "you'll have to talk louder, my breasts are deaf." People who stare like that are rude.


Rude defines this friend. But, what can I say....his girlfriend had breast reduction surgery. At least she has to sit by him, I don't. 

May try the diorama, or put in strange objects to pull out at random moments.


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## Jane (Jan 17, 2006)

FitChick said:


> I have always felt the same way (exposing bellybutton is like exposing cleavage)....I always attributed it to my religious upbringing (Orthodox Judaism), but maybe its more common than I realized?


If they want to see my bellybutton, I better be seeing more than that of them. Nope, nope, nope.


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## Tina (Jan 17, 2006)

Yeah -- a string of scarves, a paper boquet, a 1969 Dodge Charger -- or maybe you can house a little chipmunk in there, to pop up at random moments and you can feed it seeds, or something. Keeps things interesting. 

Seriously, though, doesn't it feel creepy?


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## Emma (Jan 17, 2006)

I don't really, (unless i've broken my pants, which is often LOL)

Right now I'm wearing a long black skirt, a nice top which goes to just about the top of the skirt and a jacket. I'd rather dress to suit my shape than to hide it.


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## Jane (Jan 17, 2006)

Tina said:


> Yeah -- a string of scarves, a paper boquet, a 1969 Dodge Charger -- or maybe you can house a little chipmunk in there, to pop up at random moments and you can feed it seeds, or something. Keeps things interesting.
> 
> Seriously, though, doesn't it feel creepy?


Think Chippy will go for that? Hmmmmm, guess I'll have to ask him.

It's just him, Tina. You either accept him or drown him in a tub. He does things like that, then drives out of his way to pick you up when your car is broken down. I've known much ruder men, but few quite as mammary-fixated.


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## Tina (Jan 17, 2006)

Yeah, I think Chippy would be a good samaritan and help. (bwah!)

I guess the main thing is that you find benefit in the friendship. I don't think I could take the staring, though.


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## LillyBBBW (Jan 17, 2006)

FitChick said:


> I have always felt the same way (exposing bellybutton is like exposing cleavage)....I always attributed it to my religious upbringing (Orthodox Judaism), but maybe its more common than I realized?



I've always had humongous boobs. About 14 years ago I had a breast reduction. It was a drastic reduction that still left me of substantial size even after it was done. Before the surgery EVERYBODY looked there, from the time that I was in Pre Jr High school. My bras had to be ordered in the mail even then and no matter where I went I was always made to feel like a burlesque dancer or like I was socially inappropriate during a time when all I wanted to do was hang out at Chuck E Cheeses and swim in the community pool like all the other kids. 

With all the progress I've made mentally as an adult there is still some residual scarring left over from those days. there are parts of my body even now that I've chosen to hide because *I'm* distracted by the world's distraction and as BoteroesqueBabe had in her profile at one time or other, "It's easier to put on slippers than it is to carpet the whole world." Maybe I should just say, "To hell with them all," and stop apologizing but the reminder of what once was is still too painful for me.


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## Jane (Jan 17, 2006)

Tina said:


> Yeah, I think Chippy would be a good samaritan and help. (bwah!)
> 
> I guess the main thing is that you find benefit in the friendship. I don't think I could take the staring, though.


Well, when I need someone to just smack...there he is, deserving it. LOL 

Wonder if the Cheetos stain would come out of my bra after?


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## Tina (Jan 17, 2006)

I recommend an orange bra, Jane.


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## Jane (Jan 17, 2006)

Tina said:


> I recommend an orange bra, Jane.


Could be called for. But I guess that's all up to Chippy. The nickels thing could make an interesting accompaniment when I walk.


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## Tina (Jan 17, 2006)

And be handy if you decide to play the slots.


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## Carol W. (Jan 17, 2006)

.....I've always been self-conscious of showing any abdomen or rear. In the 70's, I wore double-knit polyester pants with a long poly top; in the 80's, gabardine "Bendovers" with a long poly top; and I spent the 90's in leggings with a long knit top over them. This probably has to do as much with my conservative upbringing as it does with any issues I might have about my size. 

Today, as I've said before, I don't wear any pants, jeans, shorts, etc. Just skirts, dresses or jumpers. This is partly due to a dislike of showing that lymphedemic leg of mine, partly because my arthritis is so bad in my legs and arms and hands, that it's actually painful to pull on pants most days, and partly because I love long dresses and have decided that, at my age, I get to wear what I want-all the time!

My brand of sexy is a covered-up brand, and I never feel sexier than when I'm wearing something floor-length and long-sleeved. However, in the past few years, when it gets REALLY hot in the summer, (and it does, up here) I WILL go sleeveless. It feels so good, I wonder why I waited so long to do it....!


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## TallFatSue (Jan 17, 2006)

My belly is very much there, and although I don't go around exposing it, I don't try to conceal it either. It's obvious that I'm fat, so I might as well flaunt my figure. My clothes are comfortable and hug my curves. In the cool weather I sometimes like to wear an open sweater over my blouse, and that might even emphasize how much my belly hangs out, but it's nice and comfy. I always tuck in my blouse too, even though it means a big spare tire at the waistline. In the summer I love shorts -- and shortsleeves, no sleeves or tank tops. Gotta be comfy.


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## Jane (Jan 17, 2006)

Tina said:


> And be handy if you decide to play the slots.


Can you imagine turning Chippy upside down to shake out his nickels so you could play the slots. Better not stick him back in the bra afterwards.


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## ConnieLynn (Jan 17, 2006)

I've always been fat, but when I was younger I had a flat stomach and wore all my shirts tucked in and a belt! Then with middle age and more weight came belly and flappy upper arms. I ended up buying bigger and longer blouses because they fit my arms and would button over my chest. I am a short gal, so most blouses are long on me anyway. Then a few years ago I saw some photos of myself and cleaned out my closet! I looked like a frump in those big and long clothes. Now I have a hard time finding tops that fit just right, but I don't buy anything that is too long or too big and I like shirts that come just below my waist. I saw some skinny stylist on Oprah one day show how she cut off and rehemmed all her blouses to the correct length and I was convinced! Even on the skinny gal too long blouses emphasized her belly. I will give you short gals a hint... I often buy cute tee type tops in the lingerie section because they are shorter.


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## BellyQueen (Jan 17, 2006)

Hmmmmm how do I feel about my stomach? Well it depends where I am. My husband is from England,if I'm there I try to show it off as much as possible. If I'm in the US I try not to have it show or be exposed too much because people are more critical and outspoken here than in the UK. Although if I had my choice I'd show it off all the time because I love it. Even though it's too big to show


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## BellyQueen (Jan 17, 2006)

Btw,I just wanted to say Great question:bow:


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## MissToodles (Jan 17, 2006)

It depends on the time of the month. If I feel bloated, I'll wear an extra long shirt. 

Most of the time, I like to wear shirts fitted at the bust. They tend to be shorter,so I guess I don't hide my belly. I just try to find things which flatter me.


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## Michelle (Jan 17, 2006)

MissToodles said:


> It depends on the time of the month. If I feel bloated, I'll wear an extra long shirt.
> 
> Most of the time, I like to wear shirts fitted at the bust. They tend to be shorter,so I guess I don't hide my belly. I just try to find things which flatter me.


 
I just looked at your profile photo, Toodles, and .... well, words can't describe it, but it makes me want to grab it and cuddle it and kiss it all over.


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## MissToodles (Jan 17, 2006)

It's not my pug!


http://mfrost.typepad.com/cute_overload/2005/12/whatevs.html#comments

I just committed pug identity theft!


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## EtobicokeFA (Jan 18, 2006)

BellyQueen said:


> Hmmmmm how do I feel about my stomach? Well it depends where I am. My husband is from England,if I'm there I try to show it off as much as possible. If I'm in the US I try not to have it show or be exposed too much because people are more critical and outspoken here than in the UK. Although if I had my choice I'd show it off all the time because I love it. Even though it's too big to show



Funny I heard ot was the other way around.


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## EvilPrincess (Jan 19, 2006)

If I am out in public- long and keep it covered though it does try to struggle free. 

If I am at home lounging, me and all my glory is exposed :shocked: .


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## Tina (Jan 19, 2006)

I have This top and whenever I wear it, because it basically comes to the apex of the curve of my hips, it rides up almost to my waist. It's kinda funny to think how much I would have cared years ago. Now I'm like, "whatever."


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## EvilPrincess (Jan 19, 2006)

Tina said:


> I have This top and whenever I wear it, because it basically comes to the apex of the curve of my hips, it rides up almost to my waist. It's kinda funny to think how much I would have cared years ago. Now I'm like, "whatever."


 
Nice top <gatherin courage> I just might do it!


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## Tina (Jan 20, 2006)

See, the thing is, people know you have a big belly if you have one, no matter what you wear. But when you were drapey stuff that fits like a tent, while there is no definition, the tent hints at you being even bigger than you are because it's shapeless. I guess it's the shapelessness I don't like. The way I look at it is, I have a shape, I like it, why hide behind a tent?


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## EvilPrincess (Jan 20, 2006)

I had a good laugh at myself today. I caught a reflection in a glass door as I was going down a hallway at work. The big shirt and loose pants combo was almost clown like  Big billowy pants, MC Hammer would have been proud. I have almost turned the corner. This weekend a trip to the local Avenue, to mend my "what not to wear" moment.



Tina said:


> See, the thing is, people know you have a big belly if you have one, no matter what you wear. But when you were drapey stuff that fits like a tent, while there is no definition, the tent hints at you being even bigger than you are because it's shapeless. I guess it's the shapelessness I don't like. The way I look at it is, I have a shape, I like it, why hide behind a tent?


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## Tina (Jan 20, 2006)

LOL  Do it!



EvilPrincess said:


> I had a good laugh at myself today. I caught a reflection in a glass door as I was going down a hallway at work. The big shirt and loose pants combo was almost clown like  Big billowy pants, MC Hammer would have been proud. I have almost turned the corner. This weekend a trip to the local Avenue, to mend my "what not to wear" moment.



Good idea, Princess. They are having a stupendous clearance sale right now, so I'd go to their website, www.theavenue.com, and sign up and see if they email you a coupon to print out for even better prices. Not sure when the sale ends, if it will be before the weekend or not, but there's some great stuff there right now. 

It takes a little time, adjusting your eye to seeing yourself without the tents on, but I have to say, I've been much happier since I stopped hiding myself.


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## ThikJerseyChik (Jan 10, 2008)

I have ALWAYS been extremely self conscience of my hanging belly....so long flowing blouses have always been my attire. The past few years, getting older and coming into my own, I really don't care who looks or not, it's really about MY comfort level and what I think I look good in.

I am stuck in the 70's, so bring on the gauze, indian tapestries and peasant blouses!

Peace

PS - Jane I LOVE your quote! Rock on! :bow:


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## krazyk1372 (Jan 10, 2008)

I know this is an old thread but it caught my attention. I have always been overweight and I guess I thought I was trying to hide my body from getting noticed. It wasn't until December that I had an FA tell me, what are you trying to hide? You know its there so why not be proud and show off your assets. At first I didn't know if I should hit him or kiss him. But the more I thought about it, I was like you know he is right. So even though at times I still have a problem with wearing the shorter shirts, I try to remind myself what he told me and dress confidently about my body size. I am so happy that I found dims, it has helped me with accepting myself so much. Every one here is so nice.

Kova


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## ekmanifest (Jan 10, 2008)

Kova, thanks for bumping this thread. It's interesting to read everyone's perspective on this. I was just online shopping today (so much for that resolution) and was so concerned about the length of the shirts and wondering if they would be long enough. I'm going to give the shorter shirt a try - your right - I'm not really hiding anything anyway.


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## krazyk1372 (Jan 10, 2008)

ekmanifest said:


> Kova, thanks for bumping this thread. It's interesting to read everyone's perspective on this. I was just online shopping today (so much for that resolution) and was so concerned about the length of the shirts and wondering if they would be long enough. I'm going to give the shorter shirt a try - your right - I'm not really hiding anything anyway.



You are so very welcome. I still slip back into my old thoughts at times but I keep pushing myself daily to become more confident in my body. My daughter is 10 and she is a bit overweight and on a daily basis she talks to me about how she hates being the fat kid. I always encourge her and tell her how beautiful she is but I have come to realize, I can't just tell her I have to show her with my own confidence in myself.


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## Tina (Jan 11, 2008)

Keep pushing, Krazyk. It's worth it. Years ago, I used to wear a coat a lot, thinking that people would think that my bulk was mostly from my coat. Uh, no. None of that stuff works. We are fat and we generally look as fat as we are, so We might as well wear what we like and not just big things to cover up. Most of my blouses do not cover my belly drop, and I no longer care. C'est la vie!


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## krazyk1372 (Jan 11, 2008)

Tina said:


> Keep pushing, Krazyk. It's worth it. Years ago, I used to wear a coat a lot, thinking that people would think that my bulk was mostly from my coat. Uh, no. None of that stuff works. We are fat and we generally look as fat as we are, so We might as well wear what we like and not just big things to cover up. Most of my blouses do not cover my belly drop, and I no longer care. C'est la vie!



Thanks Tina,
I think with me its reprogramming my mind. My mother was always critical without actually realizing it. She would always say things like "pull your shirt down, it's not long enough" or "that shirt is too short waisted for your size" so that automatically gave me a complex with my belly. Had I not lived in Louisiana for my entire life, I probably would have tried the coat thing...lol Anyway, Thank you!

Kova


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## TallFatSue (Jan 11, 2008)

krazyk1372 said:


> My mother was always critical without actually realizing it. She would always say things like "pull your shirt down, it's not long enough" or "that shirt is too short waisted for your size" so that automatically gave me a complex with my belly.


My mother was always critical too, and she could be really blunt. She would always say things like "Doesn't it bother you to have that belly of yours hanging out for all the world to see?" Finally I wised up and said, "Nope."


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## franchescassbbw (Jan 11, 2008)

I wear tank tops and halters whenever I can. I'm having problems finding sexy clothes now that I'm a 6x


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## franchescassbbw (Jan 11, 2008)

ThikJerseyChik said:


> I have ALWAYS been extremely self conscience of my hanging belly....so long flowing blouses have always been my attire. The past few years, getting older and coming into my own, I really don't care who looks or not, it's really about MY comfort level and what I think I look good in.
> 
> I am stuck in the 70's, so bring on the gauze, indian tapestries and peasant blouses!
> 
> ...


I LOVE my huge hanging belly. Let it out. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Be proud of it!


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## mossystate (Jan 11, 2008)

No too short ( for me ) blouses here. If my weight were more evemly distributed, then, sure, I would give it a whirl. Since that will never happen, I will continue doin what I do. And, for anybody who wants to tell me that I hate myself, well, could be that I have an eye for what _I_ like and does look good. Your mileage may vary.


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## Dhaunae (Jan 11, 2008)

I dislike wearing anything big and frumpy but I prefer to be covered as much as possible if that makes any sense. It's funny, I don't mind my belly as much as I detest that roll between my breasts and belly. I will not wear anything that emphasizes that area more than it already is. 

I've also never been too fond of my upper arms so I tend to wear tops that have a little longer sleeves. I really wish I could get over my self confidence issues so that I could wear some of the cuter, short sleeved shirts but the battle is very hard.

Someone on the first page said they felt more confident since finding Dimensions... I think I've actually felt the opposite. Gah.. I'm such a mess.


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## Tooz (Jan 11, 2008)

As long as there's not a gap between my waistband and the end of the shirt, I don't care. Long crap doesn't really look good anyway...


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## Heavy_Cream (Jan 13, 2008)

Heck yes, I ABSOLUTELY wear shirts that cover my protruding stomach. I detest my stomach. It is my worst problem area.


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## Sweet_Serenade (Jan 13, 2008)

I don't have a huge belly or anything, but regardless it's probably my most selfconscious area.
I never let it show in public, always cover up.
But around the house I feel way more comfortable so I'll wear something that has my belly hanging out.
I've gotten far more confident in how I look lately, still, I don't really think I'll ever be the sexy clothes in public type.


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## ThikJerseyChik (Jan 13, 2008)

Heavy_Cream said:


> Heck yes, I ABSOLUTELY wear shirts that cover my protruding stomach. I detest my stomach. It is my worst problem area.



Although it seems that I am the ONLY one bothered by it, to me, it's hideous!


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## BeckaBoo (Jan 13, 2008)

I always try and cover my tummy...I mean i don't hate it, i quite like it when i'm nude but it just seems to look crappy in clothes...

I think some women can get away with showing theirs and it looks cute but mine doesn't at all, the worst thing that happens though sometimes is if the seem is pulled tight on my jeans or trousers and i get that little crease that pushes into my belly fat and it looks like i'm carrying an arse both front and back! Aggghhh!

I hate that so bad.


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## Suze (Jan 13, 2008)

I hear people are worried about their stomach and stuff? Wearing tent-like tops will only make you appear bigger. Tighter stuff (doesn't have to be skin tight) is more slimming and looks much better imo. I like em best if they are a wee bit long though, but thats me.


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## Miss Vickie (Jan 13, 2008)

susieQ said:


> I hear people are worried about their stomach and stuff? Wearing tent-like tops will only make you appear bigger. Tighter stuff (doesn't have to be skin tight) is more slimming and looks much better imo. I like em best if they are a wee bit long though, but thats me.



This is so true, Susie. It's one of the things I learned from What Not to Wear. I didn't believe it until I saw it happen but yes, more fitted things do make you look smaller.


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## DeniseW (Jan 13, 2008)

I always tend to buy shirts that are longer, it's second nature to me now, I just returned a couple of shirts to Fashion Bug that fell at a weird spot on my belly and I felt it emphasized it more(probably in my head). I guess I just feel if my belly is covered, I don't look so big...lol


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## ekmanifest (Jan 13, 2008)

Miss Vickie said:


> This is so true, Susie. It's one of the things I learned from What Not to Wear. I didn't believe it until I saw it happen but yes, more fitted things do make you look smaller.



Just because What Not to Wear has come up a few times in this thread - what do you guys think of Nick the hairstylist? I think he totally screws up some hair. Just saw one this week about two sisters - he screwed them up in a big way. OK, I digress . . . .


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## Butterbelly (Jan 13, 2008)

My tops have to be long enough to cover my stomach. I do not like the way my stomach looks in pants. I'll only wear oversized t-shirts/tops at home, otherwise my blouses and shirts are more fitting.


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## ThatFatGirl (Jan 14, 2008)

ekmanifest said:


> Just because What Not to Wear has come up a few times in this thread - what do you guys think of Nick the hairstylist? I think he totally screws up some hair. Just saw one this week about two sisters - he screwed them up in a big way. OK, I digress . . . .



I think this may have been a repeat...were two blond sisters (late 30's maybe) the subject? I don't remember being overly impressed with their hairstyles. 

I used to think Nick could walk on water, but I haven't been as moved by his work in the last year or so. Generally I still think he does do a good job, but I no longer feel like I'd sit down and let him do whatever he might want to me (though if you saw my dry, flat, dull hair, most would think I probably should).

As for the thread topic, I prefer longer tops. Ideally I like so called tunic length tops that cut across my lower belly/hips. With jeans or any other tight pants, tops need to totally cover my belly.


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## Sandie_Zitkus (Jan 14, 2008)

When I was in my 20's I never wore shorts or short sleeves. I always had to have my belly covered by my top.

Not anymore.  Life is good these days. I'm comfortable in my skin. I wear mostly no sleeve tops - I never wear tops that cover my tummy unless it's just made longer. wear shorts just about all summer.

If people don't like it - I don't care.


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Jan 14, 2008)

susieQ said:


> I hear people are worried about their stomach and stuff? Wearing tent-like tops will only make you appear bigger. Tighter stuff (doesn't have to be skin tight) is more slimming and looks much better imo. I like em best if they are a wee bit long though, but thats me.



Anything too tight around my stomach really doesn't look good- loose is better on my lower half- but perhaps more fitted around my breasts


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## vcrgrrl (Jan 14, 2008)

I have a problem finding shirts that are longer! They either fall to about my waist or they shrink in the washer/dryer. My butt doesn't bother me, but I hate showing my stomach off. I definitely try to keep it covered.


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## Suze (Jan 15, 2008)

Green Eyed Fairy said:


> Anything too tight around my stomach really doesn't look good- loose is better on my lower half- but perhaps more fitted around my breasts



I wear roomier tops too! But usually I wear a wide waist belt with it. That way I feel I get more of a "shape".


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## vcrgrrl (Jan 15, 2008)

I really like the idea of a belt. I haven't had one in years, but really it makes sense to wear one. Thanks for sharing.


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## Suze (Jan 16, 2008)

aprildain said:


> I really like the idea of a belt. I haven't had one in years, but really it makes sense to wear one. Thanks for sharing.



Only happy to help and yeah, you really should try it! All of mine are stretchy, so they are very comfortable.


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## goofy girl (Jan 16, 2008)

I try to find longer shirts but they are hard to come by. Not only because I don't like my stomach (I actually hate it so much that I have visions of slicing it off with a butcher knife sometimes...and of course being that is only imagining..there's no blood or guts or anything) but..I like longer shirts because shorter ones roll up and end up tucked under my boobs, and that's just not appropriate or attractive LOL


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## AtlantisAK (Jan 16, 2008)

In school I wasn't popular because I was taller and bigger than the other students...I was picked on about my weight constantly. That was where I started to wear the bigger, men's style t-shirts and even men's pants that just laid baggy all over the place. Very unflattering. My mom also purchased my clothes, and her idea was the same. The bigger the clothes, the less people know your size. 
I never dated anyone, just had a few female friends...None of which I talk to today. 
After I quit H.S. and moved to the city to get the rest of my education at Job Corps in Pittsburgh, I met a guy named John. He and I were together for sure after about 3 weeks after meeting. He started to tell me that I had a beautiful body, that I should dress up, that I should wear better clothes.
It's been about 2 and a half years since then and now I don't wear any of that anymore, although I do still hang onto a few of my favorite shirts for sleepwear. 
I went from wearing a size 3x, to wearing a Large or X-Large shirt, despite not gaining or losing weight either way. Instead of wearing men's jeans, I now buy women's and a size that's snug, but not too tight or too large, which is a 18-20.
Still, I don't wear sleeveless shirts because my upper arms are big and scarred by old acne marks and stretch marks from growing 20 inches in height in one year. And shorts...are almost a nightmare still.
But I'm still working on it with John's encouragement. I also now have an idea in my head to start doing nude photos, maybe even for Bodacious magazine. 
I still think I have a big tummy...so I do try to avoid certain styles of shirts that make it look bigger. If I had a choice and could afford it, I'd have just the front of my tummy reduced. 
All else, I've grown to like, for the most part.
I noticed that with wearing better fitted clothes, more and more people were admiring me. Males and females. It's amazing what a change of size or style does for someone. And I definately make a point to show off around 3/4 of my derriere. Or as my Job Corps friends called it, "Ghetto booty." Clevage is also another thing that works in distracting anyone's view away from my tummy. 40DD pushup and a low necked shirt works wonders.
The tummy though, still haunts me a little....even with the distractions.
Empire waists are a huge icky no-no, unless it's a rare, perfectly fitted shirt.


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## AtlantisAK (Jan 16, 2008)

susieQ said:


> I wear roomier tops too! But usually I wear a wide waist belt with it. That way I feel I get more of a "shape".



I tried working with a wide belt, but it just made me feel gross and pregnant (not saying it's gross to be pregnant) because of how it just sat. I have a high waist and large hips, so it looks odd and always rides up high.


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## troubadours (Jan 16, 2008)

i've gone through the "trying to hide it" motions myself. luckily i pretty much ended that a year into high school, and that was just because i wanted to dress better in general.

i love my body, but i'm not going to walk around in midriffs and hot pants (sry) because i have an idea of what looks good and what doesn't - on anyone. if i'm wearing jeans, i typically wear a tighter top. if i'm wearing shorts, i like to wear a looser, trapeze-style top over it. *shrug*


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## Surlysomething (Jan 16, 2008)

I wear clothes that fit me. Gone are the days of shapeless shirts and baggy pants. Shirts that have a more tailored look, jeans that fit. Coats that fit and have contour and shape. My belly is covered, but not "hidden". 

Dress your size, but enhance your assets. I've gained a bit of weight recently but all it did was fill my jeans out nicer. Go figure.


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## ashmamma84 (Jan 16, 2008)

Surlysomething said:


> I wear clothes that fit me. Gone are the days of shapeless shirts and baggy pants. Shirts that have a more tailored look, jeans that fit. Coats that fit and have contour and shape. My belly is covered, but not "hidden".
> 
> Dress your size, but enhance your assets. I've gained a bit of weight recently but all it did was fill my jeans out nicer. Go figure.



Co-sign! Nothing is worse than clothing that is too big...it makes one appear unkempt, imo. I adore well fitting clothing and sometimes it means altering it just a tad to achieve the look I want.

I'm not a chick that just walks around with my stomach hanging out...that's just not acceptable to me in a public setting. However, at home, I wear what the heck I please...


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## prettysteve (Jan 17, 2008)

krazyk1372 said:


> Thanks Tina,
> I think with me its reprogramming my mind. My mother was always critical without actually realizing it. She would always say things like "pull your shirt down, it's not long enough" or "that shirt is too short waisted for your size" so that automatically gave me a complex with my belly. Had I not lived in Louisiana for my entire life, I probably would have tried the coat thing...lol Anyway, Thank you!
> 
> Kova



I' LL BET YOU HAVE A REAL SEXY BELLY. WHY NOT SHOW IT OFF TO THE WORLD...


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## mossystate (Jan 17, 2008)

....................


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## SummerG (Jan 17, 2008)

I've never felt a need to hide body parts. However, I do like to wear long shirts. If a shirt sits at my waist or just beneath, I am constantly pulling it down in the back. It's just easier and more comfortable to wear a shirt that comes down mid bum/lower belly. 

I also don't give a flying potato if I am "fashionable" I spend the majority of my time in track pants and hoodies (in the winter) and track pants and tank tops (the rest of the time). I feel like I'm being suffocated if my clothes are binding in anyway.


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## sweet&fat (Jan 17, 2008)

Yeah, I'm more of a tight shirt person. Long/boxy shirts are about the worst thing possible for my figure. One trick I use is, weather permitting, wearing a small shirt that would expose my belly if worn alone over a black undershirt, given that what I'm wearing on bottom is usually black or jeans etc. I actually really love my tummy and walk around all the time at home in low-rise pj bottoms and baby tees/camisoles, but there's just no way that I'd do that in public. I see teenagers with belly hanging out and think they look cute, but I just don't think that's who I am/my style. Unless it were some relaxed context such as sunbathing in the park or at the beach, etc. Then it's fair game!

The only thing I still try to camouflage is my thighs- I'm still pretty conservative about them in public. I used to worry all the time about showing my upper arms, but I quit that about ten years ago. Too much mental and physical effort.


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## superodalisque (Jan 17, 2008)

nope. my belly is sort of a soft hanging squishy thing and pretty much of a non entity. it goes wherever i put it. i guess you'd call it easy going.

long boxy things are always too big in the shoulder and make me look like a linebacker


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