# Black Heart of Prussia



## Gluben (Nov 4, 2006)

Hi, I'm a new member here and I remember looking at Black Heart of Prussia's website quite often when it was available. I just wondered what happened to her and her website? Is she OK still?


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## Mini (Nov 4, 2006)

Gluben said:


> Hi, I'm a new member here and I remember looking at Black Heart of Prussia's website quite often when it was available. I just wondered what happened to her and her website? Is she OK still?



She's either dead or thin. Coin toss as to which is worse.


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## fatchicksrockuk (Nov 4, 2006)

Black Heart of Prussia is still alive and fat, just not as active online these days.


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## Gluben (Nov 4, 2006)

So she doesn't have a new website or anything?


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## saucywench (Nov 4, 2006)

fatchicksrockuk said:


> Black Heart of Prussia is still alive and fat, just not as active online these days.


Bel is one person I really miss from the old days. I wish she'd stop by and say hello.


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## GPL (Nov 4, 2006)

Yeah, she was so cute!:wubu: 
I loved her pics and she the sexiest belly.
I still remember she announced she had reached the 400lbs, since she was really into gaining that time. How long ago? 6 years ago? It was on the old boards for sure...

GPL.


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## Gluben (Nov 4, 2006)

Yeah something like that. I do miss her and I wonder if she's gained anymore since. I hope so! I just wish she would get back in contact.


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## Webmaster (Nov 4, 2006)

saucywench said:


> Bel is one person I really miss from the old days. I wish she'd stop by and say hello.



I miss her too, and I share your sentiment. I have probably been scarred for life with the Dani incident, but ever since I live in constant fear that a prominent member of the community will one day simply disappear without a trace, to be lost forever. That is not a happy thought, and actually one that makes me both sad and angry.


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## Gluben (Nov 4, 2006)

Forgive me for asking, but who is this Dani?


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## Littleghost (Nov 4, 2006)

She was the former webmaster of the original dimensions, along with writing articles and a bit of modeling. (correct me if I'm wrong, Conrad.) And she too, just disappeared without a trace. That's the main thing I don't like about the internet, the 'insubstantiality' of it. Not that there's anything that can be done. 

Poof! Now you see 'em... 
--Littleghost


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## Gluben (Nov 4, 2006)

Ah that's a shame. Well there's always time for them to come back. Sigh, I miss her...


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## Gluben (Nov 5, 2006)

So there's nowhere that we can still see her?


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## GPL (Nov 5, 2006)

Gluben said:


> So there's nowhere that we can still see her?



I guess her pictures will appear in some Yahoo Group for gaining issues...
Watch out for that!

GPL.


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## Zoom (Nov 9, 2006)

*de-lurks*

Black Heart of Prussia mentioned on one website that she was single, but on another that she was married and unfaithful. The unfaithfulness was not specified, but there is the possibility that she considered her web presence to be a form of cheating. When her stuff was taken down, it seemed to me as if she had either been found out or was about to be.

Anyway. If it makes one uncomfortable to put stuff up, one will remove it. I believe we should honor her wishes and not distribute anything of hers.


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## Tzetrik (Nov 11, 2006)

On a similar note, I know its been absolutely ages but does anyone know how brooke is these days?


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## GPL (Nov 11, 2006)

Brooke, Kelligrl, Black Heart, Carolyn Owens....

Guys?
Why does everyone keep on asking over and over again were these girls are and what happened to them? We better make a sticky thread called ,,Help us finding the lost feedees,, :doh: 

GPL.


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## mossystate (Nov 11, 2006)

Not to mention it starts to sound really creepy.


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## Tzetrik (Nov 11, 2006)

Its not creepy, its just out of interest. You really dont have to do much to get flamed here - If you dont want to talk about something, dont post.


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## LillyBBBW (Nov 11, 2006)

I do recall that BHOP was a married woman last we heard from her but her husband was very unhappy about her gaining. He was making himself vehemently clear that he did not like what was happening to her body. She wanted to make it to 400 but was saddened that it was causing her heartbreak at home. Sometime after that exchange she quietly disappeared. I have no idea if she was able to save her marriage but she seemed very torn and depressed about it. Such is life. She's a smart cookie, I'm sure she's doing what is best for her right now.



Zoom said:


> *de-lurks*
> 
> Black Heart of Prussia mentioned on one website that she was single, but on another that she was married and unfaithful. The unfaithfulness was not specified, but there is the possibility that she considered her web presence to be a form of cheating. When her stuff was taken down, it seemed to me as if she had either been found out or was about to be.
> 
> Anyway. If it makes one uncomfortable to put stuff up, one will remove it. I believe we should honor her wishes and not distribute anything of hers.


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## UncannyBruceman (Nov 11, 2006)

I was just thinking about Bel the other day, actually...wondering the same thing. Naturally, I admired her looks, but I GREATLY admired her attitude. She enjoyed her lifestyle and how she looked, and she didn't allow anyone to give her a hard time about it, either. I remember one particular story she posted in which a nurse got nasty with her during a checkup and told her to lose weight, and she simply responded, "actually, I was thinking about gaining a few more stone". 

I interacted with her very briefly via email about six years ago. I even sent her a portrait. Of course, I took a few liberties and made her appear just a TAD bit fatter, but that was never a problem for her  .

When you expose so much of yourself to the internet, whether it's here or in a private homepage, it's easy to understand how one wrong move can have longterm effects on your personal or professional life. On the other hand, with people being as catty and petty as they've been here at Dimensions in recent months, it's no surprise to see people abandon it altogether.


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## UncannyBruceman (Nov 11, 2006)

LillyBBBW said:


> She wanted to make it to 400 but was saddened that it was causing her heartbreak at home.



She actually did make it...pictures were posted of her playing tennis and just being active and content with her size. I don't remember all that much from the emails her and I had exchanged...but I'm pretty sure she said that she wasn't living with the husband. Things can change, though.

At the time she had disappeared, Dimensions was plagued with debates over just about anything that wasn't involved with feederism or size acceptance. I had taken some time away from here myself, actually, and it's possible that she just didn't have faith that Dimensions would be the same comfort zone that it had been.


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## LillyBBBW (Nov 11, 2006)

Yes, I remember that. She and Venus de Mpls had taken hiatuses from the board, then returned only to see the bickering start again and then once again took a leave. Belle never returned. It's quite possible her real life decided to become more interesting than this one and she never looked back. 

That makes me wonder. If someone goes to the old board, would the old board link them here? She may have gone there for a quick glance and thought, "Ah! So the place finally imploded on itself eh," and moved on. Or maybe she did find her way here and thought the new board too busy to look at. I do miss her. 




UncannyBruceman said:


> She actually did make it...pictures were posted of her playing tennis and just being active and content with her size. I don't remember all that much from the emails her and I had exchanged...but I'm pretty sure she said that she wasn't living with the husband. Things can change, though.
> 
> At the time she had disappeared, Dimensions was plagued with debates over just about anything that wasn't involved with feederism or size acceptance. I had taken some time away from here myself, actually, and it's possible that she just didn't have faith that Dimensions would be the same comfort zone that it had been.


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## GPL (Nov 12, 2006)

I remember April Jasmin returning to the Dim forums a few years ago.
She told about her WLS and how good she felt now and how she was doing.
I dont know but just that word WLS caused a huge attack on April by many members I think it is really sad! I know WLS is not an issue for Dim, but please give that girl a chance to tell about her new life!!
April never returned to Dim again I think this was so sad.
Maybe Black Heart was afraid for a simular attack?

GPL.


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## UncannyBruceman (Nov 12, 2006)

Unless Bel had the WLS herself, then I don't see how or why she'd get assaulted in a similar fashion. Even so, Dimensions now has a separate but equal WLS board, where patients can share their experiences without being attacked.


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## imfree (Mar 13, 2007)

GPL said:


> Brooke, Kelligrl, Black Heart, Carolyn Owens....
> 
> 
> Guys?
> ...


 I think it's very similar to the "Elvis Sightings" that went on for years
after his death, some people just have a hard time letting go.


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## Ho Ho Tai (Mar 13, 2007)

Gluben said:


> Hi, I'm a new member here and I remember looking at Black Heart of Prussia's website quite often when it was available. I just wondered what happened to her and her website? Is she OK still?



Not sure where to jump into this gentle and nostalgic thread, but may as well start at the beginning.

John Donne wrote, famously,

"No man is an island, entire of itself; every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main. If a clod be washed away by the sea, Europe is the less, as well as if promontory were, as well as if a manor of thy friend's or of thine own were. Any man's death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind; and therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee." 
by John Donne

After that, there is little else that need be said in support of the longing that we feel for those who disappear from our lives, but that won't stop me from trying.

I, too, lurked, and occasionally posted, on the old boards. People appear, disappear, and new folks appear, but can never replace those lost. We are all unique, just as we are all incredibly complex. Unless we are very perceptive, or very lucky, we can never know all that there is to know about ourselves through introspection alone. In every exchange that we have with another, whether at arm's length through correspondence, or at a personal, face to face and arm's embrace, we learn about ourselves as we learn about each other. Moreover, we need not be direct participants in these exchanges to gain this insight. Lurkers too, in following the interchanges - those in which thoughtfulness, depth and passion are evident - also learn about themselves.

If they don't, well, they probably aren't paying attention, or aren't yet prepared for such insights. Like rain, which soaks in best on land already damp, insights best permeate the introspective.

Some years ago, shortly after the "Big Change" at Dimensions, in which much of the archival material was lost, there was a post with a title something like "Old books, old friends, old posts". I can't reconstruct it from memory, but the essence was that old books - the ones that a person accumulates over a lifetime - are kept because they all had a role in shaping that person. Old friends also contribute to that process and, additionally, are archives themselves, reminding each other of what they are, where they are, how they got there. And old posts, like diarys, letters and other writings, are snapshots of one's psyche and interior process, almost moment by moment. The sudden disappearance of any of these can leave one in a confused, almost panicky, state.

And this is happening constantly in the lives of all of us! Who hasn't longed for a bit more stability in the nearness of ones loves, friends, acquaintances? And, when they are gone, who hasn't longed for memories, at least, that never fade?

Lastly, if I may, I want to add a link to something I just posted in the poetry thread which, in my own mind at least, has relevance to this topic.

http://www.dimensionsmagazine.com/forums/showpost.php?p=382261&postcount=63


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## LeedsFeeder (Mar 14, 2007)

I spoke to Bel a couple of months ago, she is still fat, enjoying life but just not as active on the net as she was. That's her decision and I respect it although I do miss her.

She briefly reappeared on here last year but not in the same guise although it was rather easy to work out who it was.


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## imfree (Mar 14, 2007)

LeedsFeeder said:


> I spoke to Bel a couple of months ago, she is still fat, enjoying life but just not as active on the net as she was. That's her decision and I respect it although I do miss her.
> 
> She briefly reappeared on here last year but not in the same guise although it was rather easy to work out who it was.


 Thanks, I'm glad to know she's OK. I always thought she was lovely
and interesting.


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## Jon Blaze (Mar 14, 2007)

Ahh.. I remember her. Thanks for the heads up Leeds.


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## braveuk28 (May 16, 2010)

Bell is a legend, who I had the distinct pleasure of meeting a couple of times. We had superb chats and i admire her enourmously. Sadly, she did just vanish, though one has to respects anothers right to do so. A couple of year back I dropped a card through her door just to say hi. Nothing would make me more happy than to hear she is happy and fine. ALso, dont believ any of the speculation above, no dount she is making her own fine way in this world. 

Paul


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## joswitch (May 16, 2010)

Mini said:


> She's either dead or thin. Coin toss as to which is worse.



Oh look at that - thankfully - you're wrong. 



mossystate said:


> Not to mention it starts to sound really creepy.



For those of us who've actually met one another in RL, thro' DIMS, it's kinda like Friends Reunited: 
"I wonder how whatisname from back in 2000 is doing? Oh, they're ok! That's good to know."

Cos, contrary to some assumptions - some of us are actual human beings who care about people we once met and liked, however brief that acquaintance was - and it's nice to hear how they're getting on.



LillyBBBW said:


> I do recall that BHOP was a married woman last we heard from her but her husband was very unhappy about her gaining. He was making himself vehemently clear that he did not like what was happening to her body. She wanted to make it to 400 but was saddened that it was causing her heartbreak at home. Sometime after that exchange she quietly disappeared. I have no idea if she was able to save her marriage but she seemed very torn and depressed about it. Such is life. She's a smart cookie, I'm sure she's doing what is best for her right now.



She is very much a smart person. And very much her own person too. 



LeedsFeeder said:


> *I spoke to Bel a couple of months ago, she is *still fat,* enjoying life* but just not as active on the net as she was. That's her decision and I respect it although I do miss her.
> 
> She briefly reappeared on here last year but not in the same guise although it was rather easy to work out who it was.



Great news, thanks fella. I lost touch with her when I went off travelling 7 years ago - I'm glad to hear she's doing well.  Ah, I just saw that post was 3 years old... Oh well, it'd been 4 years since I'd lost touch with Bel even in '07... so it's still news to me... Necro Post News that is...


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## mossystate (May 17, 2010)

Gluben said:


> Hi, I'm a new member here and I remember looking at Black Heart of Prussia's website quite often when it was available. I just wondered what happened to her and her website? Is she OK still?





Gluben said:


> So she doesn't have a new website or anything?





Gluben said:


> Yeah something like that. I do miss her and I wonder if she's gained anymore since. I hope so! I just wish she would get back in contact.





Gluben said:


> Forgive me for asking, but who is this Dani?





Gluben said:


> Ah that's a shame. Well there's always time for them to come back. Sigh, I miss her...





Gluben said:


> So there's nowhere that we can still see her?




Ah, I was not aware they were friends. Forgive me. I am not an AHB, so it is sometimes difficult for me to separate the true concern from the, '' I need a fix ". Sowwwwwy!:blush:


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## exile in thighville (May 17, 2010)




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