# What being an FA means to you



## paperman921 (Jan 2, 2011)

Over the last few years I've been thinking about my FAness and what it means to me. I don't try to come to any conclusions because I don't think I will ever. I am still very young and was hoping for some insight ( especially from the older FA's) what has your FAness means to you now compared to when you were younger? Or generally what it means to you now? 

I know these questions are rather vague but I was hoping to spark some conversation about anything really.


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## furious styles (Jan 2, 2011)

it's a small part of who i am that influences who i'm attracted to. it's also lead me to get a little bit involved in size acceptance. that's pretty much it.


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## joswitch (Jan 2, 2011)

Right now? Being somewhere where I am totally unattracted to 99.9% of the chicks around here... Bummer... 

But hey, the sun shone today! And I swam in the sea! Woot!


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## Chimpi (Jan 2, 2011)

Being a fat admirer is ingrained into my perception and viewpoints, the way I handle myself around others, the way I take care of the fat women that I love and admire (to the best of my ability) and those others that I am able to cater to, and it's about being attracted to (emotionally and sexually) a body type that is not only the most beautiful and feminine, but also inherently fulfilling.
At least that's what it is to me.

I like to take care of the people that I love in any way that I can.
I try to make everything easier for them. I try to get them what they need. I try to make them feel comfortable. I try to make them feel special and beautiful. This is especially true for those females close to me that are fat. ... I think I also have a tad bit of inspiration for the fat males in my life too. 
There's so much involved in all of this that I cannot possibly summarize it more than that. It expands into much more involved and deeper territory, of which I would have to compose a lengthy post and lifelong explanation of every way it impacts my life.

In short, it's just a very defining characteristic of who I am, that can be represented by my actions, my emotions, my connections and my attraction.


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## Christov (Jan 2, 2011)

It means I like fat chicks, the end. 

There are more important characteristics to define me by than my sexual preference.


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## patmcf (Jan 2, 2011)

Hello paperman,

I was going to write a long response. However, I think the answer to your question is as simple as letting you know that being an FA is just about being who you are. Embrace it and let it develop on your own terms. Good luck friend.


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## paperman921 (Jan 2, 2011)

patmcf said:


> Hello paperman,
> 
> I was going to write a long response. However, I think the answer to your question is as simple as letting you know that being an FA is just about being who you are. Embrace it and let it develop on your own terms. Good luck friend.



Well said I like this response


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## bmann0413 (Jan 3, 2011)

patmcf said:


> Hello paperman,
> 
> I was going to write a long response. However, I think the answer to your question is as simple as letting you know that being an FA is just about being who you are. Embrace it and let it develop on your own terms. Good luck friend.



Epic post, Pat.


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## Dromond (Jan 4, 2011)

Christov said:


> It means I like fat chicks, the end.
> 
> There are more important characteristics to define me by than my sexual preference.



This. Absolutely this.


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## Jon Blaze (Jan 4, 2011)

I feel it is a part of who I am. When I was younger I kind of hit both extremes of being closeted (In the beginning when I was... 12 lol), and being a maniac about it. For me it's best to be in the middle (which is where I am now), because I feel I have many traits about me that make me unique.


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## musicman (Jan 4, 2011)

OP: Here is a similar thread, with some interesting responses. It's worth reading if you haven't already:

http://www.dimensionsmagazine.com/forums/showthread.php?t=66204


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## natepogue (Jan 4, 2011)

it means i'm a badass


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## Webmaster (Jan 4, 2011)

paperman921 said:


> Over the last few years I've been thinking about my FAness and what it means to me. I don't try to come to any conclusions because I don't think I will ever. I am still very young and was hoping for some insight ( especially from the older FA's) what has your FAness means to you now compared to when you were younger? Or generally what it means to you now?
> 
> I know these questions are rather vague but I was hoping to spark some conversation about anything really.



I puzzled over my FAness when I became sexually aware (and actually before that). It took me a few years to figure out what it meant to me, that it wasn't just the sexual fantasies and fascination with fatness, but what I wanted and needed in real life. After I realized that, I never looked back.

What does my FAness mean to me compared to when I was younger? Well, when I was a teen and young man, I fantasized a lot about it all, and fantasies can be very delicious. However, reality is more delicious yet, and having a fat partner in my life turned out a wonderfully fulfilling experience, one that just never got old. The sexual fantasies and all give way to the comfort and closeness of real life (though they never go away and you get to enjoy them with your partner), but I never lost the awe I experience when looking at, holding and feeling a fat partner. 

To me, my FAness was, is, and will likely always be a complete, and completely fulfilling experience, one that shaped my life, and one that I'd never want to miss.


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## Dr. Feelgood (Jan 5, 2011)

I'm not even sure I AM an FA -- more of a WA, perhaps (where W variously stands for Woman, Wit, Wisdom, and/or Wackiness). In my experience, larger 
women score high on most of these W's. I don't know if it is because those whose body doesn't fit the current style tend to develop other aspects of their personalities. Or perhaps better nutrition builds better brains. For whatever reason, I enjoy larger women, not only for aesthetic reasons, but for their complexity and depth.*

*Which can also be found in smaller packages. Choose the one that fits YOUR life style.


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## Adrian (Jan 23, 2011)

Being an FA to me means, my luck has not changed!! I discover at place (on the Internet) where there are bunches of pretty faces and, I am NOT available! It wish there was something like this when I was single.


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## Shosh (Jan 23, 2011)

Webmaster said:


> I puzzled over my FAness when I became sexually aware (and actually before that). It took me a few years to figure out what it meant to me, that it wasn't just the sexual fantasies and fascination with fatness, but what I wanted and needed in real life. After I realized that, I never looked back.
> 
> What does my FAness mean to me compared to when I was younger? Well, when I was a teen and young man, I fantasized a lot about it all, and fantasies can be very delicious. However, reality is more delicious yet, and having a fat partner in my life turned out a wonderfully fulfilling experience, one that just never got old. The sexual fantasies and all give way to the comfort and closeness of real life (though they never go away and you get to enjoy them with your partner), but I never lost the awe I experience when looking at, holding and feeling a fat partner.
> 
> To me, my FAness was, is, and will likely always be a complete, and completely fulfilling experience, one that shaped my life, and one that I'd never want to miss.



I really like this post. It is very sincere.

Could not rep you. I hope someone will rep you for me.


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## Cactus (Jan 23, 2011)

My being an FA used to mean an awful lot to me. Back in Middle School, it meant that I was self-conscious, and afraid other kids would find out and make fun of me. I was scared to date girls because I knew if I dated one of the few fat girls in the school I would face ridicule, but I was scared if I dated a thin girl that I wouldn't be into her, which presented a whole new set of problems.

As I grew older and my pimples went away, I realized that being an FA doesn't have to define you any more than any other attribute you have. I was raised Jewish, but that just means I celebrate Hanukkah instead of Christmas. I'm very liberal on social issues, which just means that I vote for certain people on election day. I don't let these traits define me or bring me down, if anything I celebrate them because they make me who I am. That isn't to say that I ignore them, quite the contrary, but I'm not down with the concept of defining myself by checking boxes. And, if my friends don't like it then they aren't really my friends.

I like having a confident SSBBW bounce me around like a toy and having a big belly push the air out of my lungs. There! I said it! But it's irrelevant to anyone who isn't said angel taking my breath away.


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## Dr. Feelgood (Jan 23, 2011)

Shosh said:


> I really like this post. It is very sincere.
> 
> Could not rep you. I hope someone will rep you for me.



I repped him for you.


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## That Guy You Met Once (Jan 28, 2011)

Webmaster said:


> I puzzled over my FAness when I became sexually aware (and actually before that). It took me a few years to figure out what it meant to me, that it wasn't just the sexual fantasies and fascination with fatness, but what I wanted and needed in real life. After I realized that, I never looked back.



I'm at that stage now.

I'm sure it's what I want in my life, but whether or or not it's a need is to be determined.

But at this point, it doesn't mean much of anything to me beyond who I'm attracted to. Like Christov, there are much more important things in my life. But that'll change a bit when I start seeing someone, at which point I'll amend this.


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## Webmaster (Jan 28, 2011)

Seventy-Seven said:


> I'm at that stage now.
> 
> I'm sure it's what I want in my life, but whether or or not it's a need is to be determined.
> 
> But at this point, it doesn't mean much of anything to me beyond who I'm attracted to. Like Christov, there are much more important things in my life. But that'll change a bit when I start seeing someone, at which point I'll amend this.



You'll find out soon enough whether it's an infatuation or one of your life's basic needs and desires. 

About the more important things in life, it's a bit like the questions my son used to ask me when he was little: "What do you like better, chocolate or going to the movies?" and similar. I had to tell him that I liked both, wouldn't want to do without either, even though none were as important as, say, having a job or a home. There are different degrees of important, and most are not mutually exclusive. 

In my life, I found that it became very important for me to figure out where I stood with my being a FA, and I am very, very glad I did.


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## one2one (Jan 29, 2011)

Webmaster said:


> In my life, I found that it became very important for me to figure out where I stood with my being a FA, and I am very, very glad I did.



I am very glad you did, too. 

The courage to find your own truth and live it out loud paved the way for a lot of other people to do the same. Thank you.


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## _broshe_ (Jan 29, 2011)

What does being an FA mean to me?

usually all good things . Wouldn't give up the soft hugs, the wonderful cuddles, and beautiful women for anything. Did I mention the beautiful curves:wubu:

...although a bit ticked or the moment...

somebody decided they needed a discount on Lane Bryant pants tonight and guess who doesn't have a fricking lane bryant card... YEP I'm fricking approved for a credit card... worth 750 mind you 

oh well... 

guess I can find some sexy things for her to try on


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## KFD (Jan 29, 2011)

It means I don't cave in to what society defines as 'normal/acceptable/beautiful'. I am a free thinker who is not to follow instinct.


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## That Guy You Met Once (Jan 29, 2011)

Well, I'm definitely sure that I'm an FA for the long haul, since infatuations usually don't last 8 years. And yes, I am very open about it.

What I don't know yet is how well I'd get along in a relationship with a "normal-sized" girl, or if having a girl that "pleases my FAism" is more important to me than compatibility in other ways.

But yeah, I forgot that I completely agree with KFD: It's made me a lot more rebellious against standards of beauty in general, which I consider both a good (FAism could be the new punk) and bad (I don't get along with most people as well and my dating choices are much more limited) thing.


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## Gentleman Zombie (Jan 30, 2011)

It's means I'd prefer one 300 pound woman over three 100 pound women.


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## StickMan (Jan 30, 2011)

I used to think that being an FA meant that I'd only ever be drawn to BBWs, since I'd never really been all that into thinner women, except in a platonic, aesthetic way. Then I met my first girlfriend (All 5' and 80 lbs of her) and fell in love. Although the relationship fell through, she taught me a lot about myself and my range of attraction. It's not about the girl's body size or shape (although a nice body is always a good thing) it's about the girl _in_ the body.


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## Weirdo890 (Apr 6, 2011)

Webmaster said:


> I puzzled over my FAness when I became sexually aware (and actually before that). It took me a few years to figure out what it meant to me, that it wasn't just the sexual fantasies and fascination with fatness, but what I wanted and needed in real life. After I realized that, I never looked back.
> 
> What does my FAness mean to me compared to when I was younger? Well, when I was a teen and young man, I fantasized a lot about it all, and fantasies can be very delicious. However, reality is more delicious yet, and having a fat partner in my life turned out a wonderfully fulfilling experience, one that just never got old. The sexual fantasies and all give way to the comfort and closeness of real life (though they never go away and you get to enjoy them with your partner), but I never lost the awe I experience when looking at, holding and feeling a fat partner.
> 
> To me, my FAness was, is, and will likely always be a complete, and completely fulfilling experience, one that shaped my life, and one that I'd never want to miss.



I'm hoping it turns out so well for me. I love reading your posts. You are so intelligent and inspiring. Thank you sir.


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## luvbigfellas (Apr 6, 2011)

I used to think it meant I only liked big men. However, over the years, I've come to realize it means that I accept a very, very wide range of body sizes and shapes in men. The upper range is still the one I enjoy the most, but it's not the only factor in attractiveness.


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## Blockierer (Apr 7, 2011)

I've always been sexually attracted to fat women.
Now, I'm 56yo.


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## JMNYC (Apr 7, 2011)

It is a gift.


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## Weirdo890 (Apr 8, 2011)

Being an FA means that I can see the beauty of larger people. The build and proportions of their bodies visually inspire me as an artist and a human being. It means that I love to feel my girlfriend's curves, making each embrace that much sweeter. It means overcoming my own anxieties to see the beauty within myself.


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## LordQuas (Apr 16, 2011)

It doesnt really "mean" anything to me because I don't think my preferences make me special at all


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## Christov (Apr 16, 2011)

Makes self loathing come naturally.


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## Dromond (Apr 16, 2011)

LordQuas said:


> It doesnt really "mean" anything to me because I don't think my preferences make me special at all



I agree with you.


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## MrRabbit (Apr 16, 2011)

joswitch said:


> Right now? Being somewhere where I am totally unattracted to 99.9% of the chicks around here... Bummer...


Unfortunately, I feel the same for the moment. Where I live, there are not many BBWs. Finding one with whom I also connect personality-wise, is very difficult.


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## Azrael (Apr 16, 2011)

It pretty much means, I like fat chicks.

Other than that, it means it is even harder for me to relate to people.

Being a bit of an odd ball it's very difficult to relate to some people except for a very few other people.

Because of this, it means that it's even harder for me to relate to all the other guys around me.

Which is annoying, particularly because some of the women that I am sexually attracted to I do not want, at all.


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## UmbroUmbro (Apr 17, 2011)

It means living my life the way I want and defending it.


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## mithrandirjn (Apr 18, 2011)

Yeah, it doesn't really mean a whole lot to me, as my preferences are pretty wide ranging. I find a lot of girls ranging from very thin to very big highly attractive, albeit in different ways and for different reasons, so I guess it at least means I get to appreciate a wide variety of what I consider beauty.


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## tallen1 (Apr 18, 2011)

Lets start with some definitions...
My definition of a BBW is a girl with curves. She doesn't have to be clinically diagnosed as obese, or a 'feedee'. She doesn't have a certain BMI, weight, or cup size.: Its a physical trait, whether achieved by genetics, medication, diet, etc.

My definition of a 'FA" is someone who is physically attracted to a BBW. I don't think it encompasses a mental attraction, because if being 'fat' is a physical characteristic like an eye or hair color, how can someone be mentally attracted to green eyed redheads? In my humble opinion, a mental attraction to BBWs may be considered a fetish.
----

When I was 17, I brought a date to have dinner with my parents. She was 16 yrs old and what we now call a 'BBW'. While I never got any flack in high school about dating her, my parents said she was heavy, but still pretty. That was 23 years ago, and I don't think that the term 'FA' was had been penned yet.

Looking back, it wasn't solely a sexual attraction thing. It just was. Period. What is interesting is that they were all blonde, blue eyed BBWs, at least until my mid 20s. I've tried to determine why I found/find those physical attributes so appealing, and the closest thing I can think of is that being from central Texas, we had a large immigrant population from Germany/Poland in the 1800s. The stereotypical big busted, big boned blonde/blue eyed female can still be found all over those parts. Maybe thats what Im used to. In any event, I LIKE IT.

Now that Im 40 and more mature in some ways, I am attracted to smart, independent BBWs, and don't care about ethnic history. I don't feel that BBWs are smarter or less intelligent than a skinny girl (heretofore called a twig). Nor are they easier to have sex with. All things being equal, if a twig and a BBW have the exact same attributes (emotional, educational, financial), I will pick the BBW every time. If all those attributes are the same, it comes down to the physical. It gives me pleasure to look at a pretty BBW, just the same as a man at most any age can visually appreciate a pretty woman. It doesn't have to be sexual. Its just appealing to my eyes. And finally, the sexually pleasure of being with a BBW is so much more fulfilling than being with a twig. Its hard to describe without being too prurient, so I won't.

Finally, to me, an FA is someone who likes BBWs. I consider myself an FA. Im not proud or ashamed of it. It just is what it is.


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## paperman921 (Apr 19, 2011)

UmbroUmbro said:


> It means living my life the way I want and defending it.



This is awesome


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## jakub (Apr 20, 2011)

tallen1 said:


> a mental attraction to BBWs may be considered a fetish.



I don't understand what you mean.


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## tallen1 (Apr 20, 2011)

My definition of a 'FA" is someone who is physically attracted to a BBW. I don't think it encompasses a mental attraction, because if being 'fat' is a physical characteristic like an eye or hair color, how can someone be mentally attracted to green eyed redheads? In my humble opinion, a mental attraction to BBWs may be considered a fetish.


jakub said:


> I don't understand what you mean.



After reading it again a few times, I dont think I expressed myself very clearly, and cannot a this time recreate the thought processes of what I was trying to convey. I retract that last sentence.


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## Zandoz (Apr 20, 2011)

I know I'll probably catch flack for this, but here goes.........

What does being an FA mean to me? For the most part it means being pigeon holed and stereotyped...which is why I try to avoid the label. I have tailor fitted preferences and attractions....the one size fits all off the rack stereotype does not fit me.

Commense firing!


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## Dromond (Apr 20, 2011)

Zandoz said:


> I know I'll probably catch flack for this, but here goes.........
> 
> What does being an FA mean to me? For the most part it means being pigeon holed and stereotyped...which is why I try to avoid the label. I have tailor fitted preferences and attractions....the one size fits all off the rack stereotype does not fit me.
> 
> Commense firing!



You're fine, because I'm about to distract everyone with a bigger target.

I reject the label completely. I'm not an FA. I don't admire fat. I admire the fat form, the curves, the softness, the hyperfemininity of a bigger woman. The entire aesthetic. Fat itself, weight, numbers, BBW, SSBBW, etc. mean nothing at all. I like what I like. My mental reaction is artistic appreciation. My physical reaction is a hard on.

There is nothing special about me. I don't deserve a cookie just because I like fat chicks. I also am more interested in the person inside the body than I am the body itself. If a woman I'm in love with were to lose weight, I wouldn't care. I would support her efforts. If she lost all the extra weight, I'd still support and love her. I wouldn't leave, because that would be a really shallow move. If you commit, you commit. Keep your damn promises.

So, no. I am not an FA. I just like fat chicks.


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## Zandoz (Apr 20, 2011)

Dromond said:


> You're fine, because I'm about to distract everyone with a bigger target.
> 
> I reject the label completely. I'm not an FA. I don't admire fat. I admire the fat form, the curves, the softness, the hyperfemininity of a bigger woman. The entire aesthetic. Fat itself, weight, numbers, BBW, SSBBW, etc. mean nothing at all. I like what I like. My mental reaction is artistic appreciation. My physical reaction is a hard on.
> 
> ...



What he said!


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## Weirdo890 (Apr 20, 2011)

Dromond said:


> You're fine, because I'm about to distract everyone with a bigger target.
> 
> I reject the label completely. I'm not an FA. I don't admire fat. I admire the fat form, the curves, the softness, the hyperfemininity of a bigger woman. The entire aesthetic. Fat itself, weight, numbers, BBW, SSBBW, etc. mean nothing at all. I like what I like. My mental reaction is artistic appreciation. My physical reaction is a hard on.
> 
> ...



We are all just people. We are the sum of our history and our personalities. Let us just appreciate each other as we are. :happy:


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## TimeTraveller (Apr 21, 2011)

Dromond said:


> You're fine, because I'm about to distract everyone with a bigger target.
> 
> I reject the label completely. I'm not an FA. I don't admire fat. I admire the fat form, the curves, the softness, the hyperfemininity of a bigger woman. The entire aesthetic. Fat itself, weight, numbers, BBW, SSBBW, etc. mean nothing at all. I like what I like. My mental reaction is artistic appreciation. My physical reaction is a hard on.
> 
> ...


Exactly. For me being an FA is simply falling in love with a girl who happened to be fat and loving her as she is. The fat admiration is just the natural outcome. 


Gentleman Zombie said:


> It's means I'd prefer one 300 pound woman over three 100 pound women.


When I was in high school my father said no son of his would date a fat girl, he tried to break us up, and he pressured me to date only petite cuties. Lucky for me I recognized he was shallow so I stood up to him. My impression was confirmed after my mother turned 40 and he traded her in for two 20s. Nowadays I like 50s just fine and my wife is worth four 100 pound women, not due her weight (although that's great too) but because that's just how she is. :smitten:


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## Lou Grant (Apr 21, 2011)

Dromond said:


> You're fine, because I'm about to distract everyone with a bigger target.
> 
> I reject the label completely. I'm not an FA. I don't admire fat. I admire the fat form, the curves, the softness, the hyperfemininity of a bigger woman. The entire aesthetic. Fat itself, weight, numbers, BBW, SSBBW, etc. mean nothing at all. I like what I like. My mental reaction is artistic appreciation. My physical reaction is a hard on.
> 
> ...




To me it seems like you are over thinking things, as well as getting a bit preachy.

To me FA is nothing more then a convenient label applied, mostly on the internet, that allows people who are attracted physically to a body type to be able to identify each other at places and on sites such as this one. It is useful because a lot of us dont find a lot of people who feel similarly because general society looks upon what we find attractive as being unattractive.

It seems that you are somehow correlating that back to a persons ability to have a meaningful relationship, and to me there are too many other factors involved for you to be able to pull out your soap box and make that proclamation simply by knowing what someone find appealing physically. Plus you added a lot of your own specifics about artistic appreciation and not caring about numbers or whatever and that is your deal. Everyone is going to be a little different. 

Ive never once expected a cookie simply because of what I find attractive in women. I did however expect to be able to come to this site and not be lectured about my preference. Apparently even that is expecting too much lately.


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## Dromond (Apr 21, 2011)

I'm not going around this block again. The only thing I will say is, if you feel like I'm preaching at you then that's your problem.


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## Lou Grant (Apr 21, 2011)

Dromond said:


> I'm not going around this block again. The only thing I will say is, if you feel like I'm preaching at you then that's your problem.



No problem here, but maybe you take a look at what forum you are in and use a little common sense. Especially if you say you've gotten a similar reaction. That might be your first clue

Just some friendly advice for someone who appears to need it


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## Dromond (Apr 21, 2011)

I've gotten reactions across the spectrum, ranging from sincere thank yous to reactions like yours. If you want to understand where I'm coming from, my signature says it all. Approval is always appreciated, but I don't need it. Disapproval washes right off me.


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## Lou Grant (Apr 21, 2011)

Dromond said:


> I've gotten reactions across the spectrum, ranging from sincere thank yous to reactions like yours. If you want to understand where I'm coming from, my signature says it all. Approval is always appreciated, but I don't need it. Disapproval washes right off me.



Neither the heat you received for your comments nor your little life motto interest me in the least.

Quite simply I thought you were a little heavy handed in the original comment I quoted, so I commented with my opinion. If it bothers you that much go ahead and let it out. Go ahead and get the last word in if you’re that type, and we can be done here and let the thread get back on track.

Peace be with you, fellow FA - Oops - I mean guy who likes fat chicks


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