# Frustrated with BBW Dating sites



## Bigbud1 (Mar 11, 2009)

I have been looking for a partner in the San Antonio area of Texas. I signed up for one of those dating sites. They dangle the carrot, then ask for a pretty hefty sum of money to contact other "members". Do you guys there at Dims have any other advice on where to find ladies looking for their ideal? I would think my chances of getting a girlfriend would be better at WalMart....lol.


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## MamaLisa (Mar 11, 2009)

Bigbud1 said:


> I have been looking for a partner in the San Antonio area of Texas. I signed up for one of those dating sites. They dangle the carrot, then ask for a pretty hefty sum of money to contact other "members". Do you guys there at Dims have any other advice on where to find ladies looking for their ideal? I would think my chances of getting a girlfriend would be better at WalMart....lol.



ill go pack.. plane from melbourne to LA is 18 hours then to san antonio should be another 5 hour flight with a 2 hour stop over.. 


see u in about 30 hours lol

im in the same boat but on the other side of the world love.. dam that!


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## wrestlingguy (Mar 11, 2009)

Just wondering if there's anything wrong with finding a date at the Wal Mart, or library, or any other place in real life.


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## Keb (Mar 11, 2009)

Nobody's ever asked at walmart. I'd scribble an email if he actually seemed serious, though.


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## AlethaBBW (Mar 11, 2009)

Bigbud1 said:


> I have been looking for a partner in the San Antonio area of Texas. I signed up for one of those dating sites. They dangle the carrot, then ask for a pretty hefty sum of money to contact other "members". Do you guys there at Dims have any other advice on where to find ladies looking for their ideal? I would think my chances of getting a girlfriend would be better at WalMart....lol.



I'm not sure what the deal is, but I've had a very hard time finding potential dates here in Texas. You'd think Houston would have a thriving BBW scene, but sadly it does not. Dating sites haven't turned up much, either.

If you figure it out, let me know.


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## Bigbud1 (Mar 11, 2009)

Hey Wrestlingguy, I wish things were that simple. In this day and age, how many people would be really freaked out by a relative stranger approaching them and asking them out ....albeit after some informal chit chat and even then, only for a coffee? I'm not sure if it's a Urban Texas thing or a "whole of the U.S.thing" as since coming to this country, I have not been outside Texas!
Hence my putting ad's on a dating site. Oh well.


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## gaffo (Mar 12, 2009)

Bigbud1 said:


> Hey Wrestlingguy, I wish things were that simple. In this day and age, how many people would be really freaked out by a relative stranger approaching them and asking them out ....albeit after some informal chit chat and even then, only for a coffee? I'm not sure if it's a Urban Texas thing or a "whole of the U.S.thing" as since coming to this country, I have not been outside Texas!
> Hence my putting ad's on a dating site. Oh well.



coming to this country? where ya from?

Ya, American women today are pretty paranoid - after watching the local smut "news" many think that walking down the street is a risk to life and limb. The paranoia is at a pretty neurotic level and meeting someone at say Wal Mart is not so easy anymore. I've done the Wal Mart thing twice - small talk then introduction.....then "see ya" - never see them again at the store.

internet dating seems to be alot easier - even long distance ones. of which I've done a couple over the years (several states away - actually able to have a long distance relationship and travel also).

don't limit yourself to local - with mass communication today, if you "click' with someone on the other side of the Nation and they are as commited to you as you are to them, you can make it work. You will either move to her, or she to you.

fist look locally due to convienence, but if you don't see anything - go all out and look all over the place! you never know guy.

BBW finder is the best service IMO, yahoo comes in a close second.

Large in Lovely is not so great (too limited).

not tried any other services.

- I really like BBW finder - you can check them out without even being a member!! thats what I did this last time. I was no longer a member, but saw a pict of a gal (I like big butted pearshaped gals myself) that interested me. So I joined up for 3-months just send her a letter, and now we are emailing each other. sadly she's far away - but hey what can ya do about that?


good luck Guy!


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## mossystate (Mar 12, 2009)

gaffo said:


> Ya, American women today are pretty paranoid - after watching the local smut "news" many think that walking down the street is a risk to life and limb. The paranoia is at a pretty neurotic level and meeting someone at say Wal Mart is not so easy anymore.




Yeah, cuz women might not have any real experiences or real reasons. Must be all that news we are watching. What an ignorant thing to say, on so many levels. Trust me...lots of women can be, and are, receptive to guys without your attitude. Maybe you look desperate. That is always a turn off. Oh, and calling women paranoid and neurotic?... charming.:wubu:
----


To the OP...yeah, those dating sites tend to require that people pay to do any actual communication. It is a business, so I understand. As for the approaching strangers...that is also a crapshoot. Probably always good to really imagine yourself being in the other persons place. I have had a couple of situations where I did that casual, get a ' cup of coffee ', thing...but only when it felt VERY comfortable and safe, and the chatting up did not seem predatory in nature. I can spot the guys who are lurking on the edges of things...just waiting. Blah. Maybe if you like a certain dating site, you could give it a whirl for a few months?


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## That1BigGirl (Mar 12, 2009)

Try Wal Mart... but be shopping for something real (not just chicks- unless it's peeps since it is near Easter). 

And approach is everything.


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## C Side BBW Lover (Mar 12, 2009)

The answer to your query, OP, is:

*PlentyofFish.com*
It's free, and because it is free, it is populated with alll sorts of people. All you need to do is type in your preferred parameters for a partner (BBW, I presume?) and it will show you hundreds of profiles ---well maybe only a dozen or so in Houston ---but more than you are finding on Yahoo and BBWFinder.

I can also testify that trying to meet a BBW in a WalMart or grocery store is FUTILE. When people are shopping for food and/or necessities, and are in a hurry, it is almost impossible for them to suddenly change gears from Hunter-Gatherer mode to Sexy & Desirable BBW mode. I still say we need to invent some sort of secret hand signal or googly-eye wink, or something, so that a BBW knows we are interested in her, and so we know she is responsive to our attempts to meet them.

I've met numerous BBWs off of POF...from Canada, Washington State, as well as Las Vegas. So give it a try.


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## olwen (Mar 12, 2009)

Bigbud1 said:


> Hey Wrestlingguy, I wish things were that simple. In this day and age, how many people would be really freaked out by a relative stranger approaching them and asking them out ....albeit after some informal chit chat and even then, only for a coffee? I'm not sure if it's a Urban Texas thing or a "whole of the U.S.thing" as since coming to this country, I have not been outside Texas!
> Hence my putting ad's on a dating site. Oh well.



What's wrong with talking over coffee? You almost make it seem like talking over coffee is either too much work or too slow. Or do you mean that you never get past talking over coffee?


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## olwen (Mar 12, 2009)

C Side BBW Lover said:


> The answer to your query, OP, is:
> 
> *PlentyofFish.com*
> It's free, and because it is free, it is populated with alll sorts of people. All you need to do is type in your preferred parameters for a partner (BBW, I presume?) and it will show you hundreds of profiles ---well maybe only a dozen or so in Houston ---but more than you are finding on Yahoo and BBWFinder.
> ...



Hey, as long as one of those secret hand signals include one that means "Thanks, but no thanks." I'll be happy to learn them, but I know I probably wouldn't be interested in every guy who used the signal. Just being interested isn't enough to peak a woman's interest. A guy has to actually be interesting and cute as well.







If it were me looking I'd try as many sites as possible. Maybe there's a regional bbw dating site available. Does craigslist have a Houston page? Don't most sites let you do a general search in your area? You can't look at the profiles but you can at least see how many there are to see if it's worth joining. 

Women are approachable - if you know how to approach....


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## AnotherJessica (Mar 12, 2009)

I was on plenty of fish and I did find a couple of really good people. Both I dated and am still friends with since we've broken up. Overall, it seems like most are just looking for a booty call and I'm not into what at all. It's worth a shot once you weed out all of the creeps.


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## Ample Pie (Mar 13, 2009)

We're not paranoid. Be a woman then try to define our motives. Grr.

grumble grumble grumble, yeah, what Mossy said.

----

To the OP: best of luck. It can be hard to filter through those sites and to meet people in real life, but I find that being open to things/situations/twists of fate can be helpful.


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## BothGunsBlazing (Mar 13, 2009)

just do what I do to pick up women.

have a friend dress up like a robot. 
go to place with a lot of people. 
go up to cute girl. 
have friend run out in robot suit shouting something like I AM FROM THE FUTURE. 
shout OMG A ROBOT.
Punch robot friend in face.
Hold your hand because you broke it from punching a robot which is made of metal to add realism. 
girl forever grateful.
heart won.

note: do not have friend dress like this.







it'll just make you look like an asshole.


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## mergirl (Mar 13, 2009)

BothGunsBlazing said:


> just do what I do to pick up women.
> 
> have a friend dress up like a robot.
> go to place with a lot of people.
> ...


hahahahahahahaha! I REALLY wasnt expecting THAT dating tip! Need to tell my single friends about that.


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## NoWayOut (Mar 13, 2009)

BothGunsBlazing said:


> just do what I do to pick up women.
> 
> have a friend dress up like a robot.
> go to place with a lot of people.
> ...



That's a new one.


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## mergirl (Mar 13, 2009)

NoWayOut said:


> That's a new one.


In the olden days people would get their friends to dress up as people from 2009 to punch back into the future.


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## NoWayOut (Mar 13, 2009)

mergirl said:


> In the olden days people would get their friends to dress up as people from 2009 to punch back into the future.



I don't get it.


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## mergirl (Mar 13, 2009)

NoWayOut said:


> I don't get it.


no me neither.


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## MamaLisa (Mar 15, 2009)

wrestlingguy said:


> Just wondering if there's anything wrong with finding a date at the Wal Mart, or library, or any other place in real life.



In australia... stick thin is very in.. and 99% of guys want stick thin.. so going out to find someone in real life.. is not reality. Tried and tried again 

PS: we dont have walmart here hahahahhahaha


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## Prince Dyscord (Mar 16, 2009)

Bigbud1 said:


> Hey Wrestlingguy, I wish things were that simple. In this day and age, how many people would be really freaked out by a relative stranger approaching them and asking them out ....albeit after some informal chit chat and even then, only for a coffee? I'm not sure if it's a Urban Texas thing or a "whole of the U.S.thing" as since coming to this country, I have not been outside Texas!
> Hence my putting ad's on a dating site. Oh well.



It works surprisingly well. That's how I met my wife. Saw her at the mall, walked up to her and started a conversation. This is after browsing dating sites and talking to a few people online.


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## KerryNation (Mar 16, 2009)

Heh. I'm in the same boat as the OP is, except I'm in Oregon. Doesn't help that I'm painfully shy and cannot ever find the right words to say to introduce myself....so it just looks like I'm creepily staring at a girl, when all i'm really doing is trying to work my nerve up to say "hi.". 

DAMN this timid streak!


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## bdog (Mar 16, 2009)

Ehh.. inernet dating is OK but what happens if you see a really special gal out and about on the street? You may not get a second chance. Hence, the following blurb:

Approaching women comes naturally for some, and is really difficult for others. I used to be horrible at it, and I've gotten much better with some effort. Not all women were raised with manners so whatever you do don't internalize their reactions. If a girl, any girl, were nervous and sorta fumbling as she attempted to talk to me I'd probably smile and touch her on the arm to make her feel better. Don't expect the same treatment from most women. They want a man, after all, and while you know you've got strength within you've got to make that externally visible first. 

The key is just to practice. Once you get shot down a few times you learn that it's not that big of a deal, and once you figure that out, you'll be more relaxed and your success rate will improve. Personally I don't even think it's a bad idea to go in just assuming you'll get shot down. Fuck 'em. Fuck it. Later, try the reverse and just assume you've got the date or number or whatever your goal is. Also, be indirect (unthreatening), or be incredibly direct (can be quite powerful), but nothing in between. Hmm... don't stand too close, and as a general rule don't stay too long. Practice on girls you're not interested in just for the sake of interacting with people. Yesterday I was at a clothing store so I decided to ask a couple of girls which coat they prefer... little things like that. If you're a total baby you can flirt with baristas, but come on, they've got no place to go. 

Anyway, with any luck you'll be too busy dating to worry about dating sites.  Hah... well, I'm still looking, but if I do see someone that intrigues me I think it's safe to say the odds of getting her are better now that I know that I'll approach anyone I feel like approaching.

Gentleman, knock 'em dead.


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## Tau (Mar 16, 2009)

I've been reading all the posts and it made think over my own life and I actually got pretty bleak. In all my 26 years on the planet - roughly 10 of which were when I was at the age of sexual consent - exactly 2 real life, met them on the street guys, have asked me out in a decent way. Both were charming, attractive and a ton of fun - but also in a relationship with somebody else and, turns out, only interested in a mistress  It makes me bleak cos I'm sure fat people before the invention of the internet had relationships that didn't begin as virtual flirting?! There's nothing wrong with online dating - I've used it and enjoyed and, as somebody said earlier, once you wade through the creeps and bootycalls, you can really meet some amazing people. But wouldn't it be absolutely lovely if I, as a fat girl in a very thin concious society, could meet a genuinely single, lovely man who would take me out and not expect sex after 5 minutes or for me to be thrilled that he's asked me to be his second wife *sigh*


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## KerryNation (Mar 16, 2009)

Tau said:


> I've been reading all the posts and it made think over my own life and I actually got pretty bleak. In all my 26 years on the planet - roughly 10 of which were when I was at the age of sexual consent - exactly 2 real life, met them on the street guys, have asked me out in a decent way. Both were charming, attractive and a ton of fun - but also in a relationship with somebody else and, turns out, only interested in a mistress  It makes me bleak cos I'm sure fat people before the invention of the internet had relationships that didn't begin as virtual flirting?! There's nothing wrong with online dating - I've used it and enjoyed and, as somebody said earlier, once you wade through the creeps and bootycalls, you can really meet some amazing people. But wouldn't it be absolutely lovely if I, as a fat girl in a very thin concious society, could meet a genuinely single, lovely man who would take me out and not expect sex after 5 minutes or for me to be thrilled that he's asked me to be his second wife *sigh*



Sounds like you and I have the same goals, LOL! My friends all give me grief because I'm not out every Friday night trying to "get laid" or "find a f*** buddy", as they put it. They don't understand that THAT's not what I'm looking for, really. I want to meet a nice BBW, who has the same interests as me, you know? They don't understand that the LAST thing I want is some skinny club girl blowing her beer breath in my face as I help her to my car....where she promptly hurls all over the interior. 

THEY can have THAT kind of girl. I'm looking for someone else.


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## olwen (Mar 16, 2009)

bdog said:


> Ehh.. inernet dating is OK but what happens if you see a really special gal out and about on the street? You may not get a second chance. Hence, the following blurb:
> 
> Approaching women comes naturally for some, and is really difficult for others. I used to be horrible at it, and I've gotten much better with some effort. Not all women were raised with manners so whatever you do don't internalize their reactions. If a girl, any girl, were nervous and sorta fumbling as she attempted to talk to me I'd probably smile and touch her on the arm to make her feel better. Don't expect the same treatment from most women. They want a man, after all, and while you know you've got strength within you've got to make that externally visible first.
> 
> ...



I can't believe I'm about to say this, but I recommend that everybody read 
"The Game" by Neil Strauss. There's a lot of stuff that will make you cringe, but buried under all the silly woman chasing antics are really practical tips for how to build up your own confidence (despite how you look) without coming off as a jackass, and how talk to women, not just how to pick them up. One of the things Strauss says is to expect to be shot down and to just see that as practice. Another thing he says is to learn how to read body language (which is good to know on it's own) as it pertains to female sexuality. 

Even if no one gets anything useful out of it, it's still a fun read.


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## AnotherJessica (Mar 17, 2009)

Tau said:


> I've been reading all the posts and it made think over my own life and I actually got pretty bleak. In all my 26 years on the planet - roughly 10 of which were when I was at the age of sexual consent - exactly 2 real life, met them on the street guys, have asked me out in a decent way. Both were charming, attractive and a ton of fun - but also in a relationship with somebody else and, turns out, only interested in a mistress  It makes me bleak cos I'm sure fat people before the invention of the internet had relationships that didn't begin as virtual flirting?! There's nothing wrong with online dating - I've used it and enjoyed and, as somebody said earlier, once you wade through the creeps and bootycalls, you can really meet some amazing people. But wouldn't it be absolutely lovely if I, as a fat girl in a very thin concious society, could meet a genuinely single, lovely man who would take me out and not expect sex after 5 minutes or for me to be thrilled that he's asked me to be his second wife *sigh*




You are SO cute! I hope you find what you're looking for. 

It's funny because whenever somebody flirts with me when I'm out with friends or something like that, I just assume that they have that flirty type of personality and not that they might actually be interested. I'm also really shy so that doesn't help.


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## Tau (Mar 18, 2009)

KerryNation said:


> Sounds like you and I have the same goals, LOL! My friends all give me grief because I'm not out every Friday night trying to "get laid" or "find a f*** buddy", as they put it. They don't understand that THAT's not what I'm looking for, really. I want to meet a nice BBW, who has the same interests as me, you know? They don't understand that the LAST thing I want is some skinny club girl blowing her beer breath in my face as I help her to my car....where she promptly hurls all over the interior.
> 
> THEY can have THAT kind of girl. I'm looking for someone else.



Why, oh why, do you live on the other side of the world? *sigh*


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## Tau (Mar 18, 2009)

AnotherJessica said:


> You are SO cute! I hope you find what you're looking for.
> 
> It's funny because whenever somebody flirts with me when I'm out with friends or something like that, I just assume that they have that flirty type of personality and not that they might actually be interested. I'm also really shy so that doesn't help.



LOL! Thanks chick  I feel you on the shy bit though. I'm desperately shy and the kind of work i do has forced me out of my shell professionally but in my personal life I'd still rather dance with the girls than flirt over drinks. I'm totally in awe of fat girls who've mastered the art of flirtation. When I like a guy its almost a guarantee I'll stalk him from afar and then be rendered dorkily speechless the moment he tries to talk to me :doh:


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## jewels_mystery (Mar 20, 2009)

Thank God I was born a girl. I don't have the backbone that men have in terms of going up to a stranger and asking them out. That said, its all about the approach. If a guy approaches me the wrong way, I will think that he's a creep or something. You can never go wrong commenting on a woman's smile. What kills me are the ones that you think are checking you out but never say a word. uggh


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## disconnectedsmile (Mar 20, 2009)

jewels_mystery said:


> Thank God I was born a girl. I don't have the backbone that men have in terms of going up to a stranger and asking them out.


where does this old-fashioned scenario put guys like me? 
frankly, i am sick to _death_ of the status quo that says a girl can't ask out a boy. personally, i am far too shy to really go up to a girl, no matter how attractive, and say "hi, i'm charlie, you're attractive, want to get coffee sometime, etc." i have sometimes in the past, but even then i was a nervous wreck.
it's the 21st century, damnit. it's more than okay for girls to hit on boys.


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## jewels_mystery (Mar 20, 2009)

disconnectedsmile said:


> where does this old-fashioned scenario put guys like me?
> frankly, i am sick to _death_ of the status quo that says a girl can't ask out a boy. personally, i am far too shy to really go up to a girl, no matter how attractive, and say "hi, i'm charlie, you're attractive, want to get coffee sometime, etc." i have sometimes in the past, but even then i was a nervous wreck.
> it's the 21st century, damnit. it's more than okay for girls to hit on boys.



Call it old fashioned if you will. I don't ever see myself going up and asking a guy out. Now if we are friends already, that's a different story. I asked my girlfriends about this, none have asked a guy out.


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## disconnectedsmile (Mar 20, 2009)

jewels_mystery said:


> Call it old fashioned if you will. I don't ever see myself going up and asking a guy out. Now if we are friends already, that's a different story. I asked my girlfriends about this, none have asked a guy out.


does this mean i'm ahead of my time, or behind the times?


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## jewels_mystery (Mar 20, 2009)

disconnectedsmile said:


> does this mean i'm ahead of my time, or behind the times?



Your right on time. I am the one who is behind. :wubu:


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## sugarmoore (Mar 20, 2009)

dating is difficult period! when i go online, no one lives in my area or they are married or they are creepy. in person no one ever approaches me! the few in person dates ive made, ive had to ask him out, not that there is anythiong wrong with that. but i like to be approached! i dont think any woman would freak out if approached genuinely. mabye you guys shouldnt be so afraid of a lil innocent rejection if it means you might get a date every now and then


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## disconnectedsmile (Mar 20, 2009)

sugarmoore said:


> i dont think any woman would freak out if approached genuinely.


why haven't i met these women


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## gaffo (Mar 20, 2009)

bdog said:


> Ehh.. inernet dating is OK but what happens if you see a really special gal out and about on the street? You may not get a second chance. Hence, the following blurb:
> 
> Approaching women comes naturally for some, and is really difficult for others. I used to be horrible at it, and I've gotten much better with some effort. Not all women were raised with manners so whatever you do don't internalize their reactions. If a girl, any girl, were nervous and sorta fumbling as she attempted to talk to me I'd probably smile and touch her on the arm to make her feel better. Don't expect the same treatment from most women. They want a man, after all, and while you know you've got strength within you've got to make that externally visible first.
> 
> ...




Excellent advice Sir!

Basically advocating desensitization. I especially like your advice to small talk to women youa re not interested in. I started doing that a few years ago in order to "Cure" my shyness. I have done so, but it did take years.

Even starting small talk with guys helps in the whole socialize thing.

- oh ya, of course when I see a women that really turns me on, it is not the same as women that I'm not attracted to and so it is still alot harder to walk up and start small talk. I try to think of her as "my sister" as much as I can and try not to mentally fixate on her figure as I talk to her. that helps a little.

- try all avenues and opportunities no mater how remote, one never knows when fortune decides to smile on you!


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## gaffo (Mar 20, 2009)

disconnectedsmile said:


> where does this old-fashioned scenario put guys like me?
> frankly, i am sick to _death_ of the status quo that says a girl can't ask out a boy. personally, i am far too shy to really go up to a girl, no matter how attractive, and say "hi, i'm charlie, you're attractive, want to get coffee sometime, etc." i have sometimes in the past, but even then i was a nervous wreck.
> it's the 21st century, damnit. it's more than okay for girls to hit on boys.




There is a "trick" that works pretty well. If you've seen the movie "Dark Blue World" one guy in that movie mentions the same trick.

Women will welcome a plea for help. So if you are in say Walmart, and you see a lady you are interested in, note the section she is in and what she's shopping for. Ask her for a recommendation.

For example, she's looking a yogurt, you go over there and look like you are a little confused, tell her that you are trying to eat better and not too knowledge about about yogurt, ask her what brand is the best.

I know it sounds corny and maybe a little disshonest - but if done in a non-creepy way she will almost certianly know that you are using the "help" thing as a crutch in order to get to know her. This way, if she is not interested niether person looses face and you get your yogert recommendation and you both go your separate ways. If she is interested, you have the foundation to work with where if you can start a little small talk you are good to go.

just 2 -cents. not like I'm a playboy or anything (FAR FAR from it!)


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Mar 21, 2009)

Believe it or not, I found some nice dates on Craigs List.....just be strong in your wording as to exactly what you want...and be prepared to dig through the responses to find the few that you might be interested in. 
Perhaps try answering a few CL ads? I prefer to make my own ad, though, and let them come to me


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## NoWayOut (Mar 21, 2009)

KerryNation said:


> Sounds like you and I have the same goals, LOL! My friends all give me grief because I'm not out every Friday night trying to "get laid" or "find a f*** buddy", as they put it. They don't understand that THAT's not what I'm looking for, really. I want to meet a nice BBW, who has the same interests as me, you know? They don't understand that the LAST thing I want is some skinny club girl blowing her beer breath in my face as I help her to my car....where she promptly hurls all over the interior.
> 
> THEY can have THAT kind of girl. I'm looking for someone else.



I'm the same. Once a girl gets really drunk, I lose interest in her in a hurry. I've also dealt with the nonsense from guys who like that. For instance, one drunk girl once hit on me, and I declined and went back to my car. On the drive back, one of the guys I was with complained how nothing ever happened to us, and when I brought this up, his response was "And where is she now?", implying the night sucked because I wasn't bringing her back.

My response was, "She's where I want her to be: going home"


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## Rahero2k3 (Mar 21, 2009)

I feel like there are not enough avenues for people who don't go to clubs and bars to meet people and sometimes I understand the need for internet websites because you could hopefully meet someone.

I personally don't like bars and clubs because they are always drunk and it consists of nothing but cliqs why can't we all meet in mingle in a non-drunk and crazy environment.


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## rachael (Mar 21, 2009)

jewels_mystery said:


> Thank God I was born a girl. I don't have the backbone that men have in terms of going up to a stranger and asking them out.



you know i find as i get older, i am far bolder than i was as a young adult/teenager. i don't know if it's because i find that most men are more than a little reluctant to approach a fat woman(at least from my experience), or because i just don't care about rejection as much as i used to. i guess i've been rejected so much, that it doesn't really faze me as much as it used to. not saying that i'm made of steel or am immune to rejection, but it doesn't stop me from smiling at and/or talking up someone that i like. i think it's fun to be forward. it's a little disconcerting a lot of men at first, but i find that most like it.



jewels_mystery said:


> That said, its all about the approach. If a guy approaches me the wrong way, I will think that he's a creep or something. You can never go wrong commenting on a woman's smile.



i agree that a bad approach will creep me out. although i will say that a guy once said to me that i had a the lips of a fifteen year old girl...when i was 25. i found that comment on my smile very creepy. he's one of my best friends now, but it really creeped me out when he said it.


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## jewels_mystery (Mar 21, 2009)

Rahero2k3 said:


> I feel like there are not enough avenues for people who don't go to clubs and bars to meet people and sometimes I understand the need for internet websites because you could hopefully meet someone.
> 
> I personally don't like bars and clubs because they are always drunk and it consists of nothing but cliqs why can't we all meet in mingle in a non-drunk and crazy environment.



I totally agree. At bars and clubs I end up feeling like the odd man out. Plus nothing disgusts me more than drunk people.


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## verucassault (Mar 3, 2010)

meh, i am so over internet dating, or dating in general. 
although i had a serious 2 year relationship that was a result of bbwdatefinder, i just cant get with it.
i went back on that site and all i found were men into playing games and sending winks.

now i was a paid member, and i often got winks saying...ooh i am interested in your profile write me and i will reply. are you FORREAL. okay, i am expected to pay to send emails but you can just save your pennise and demand for me to send you an email.
i dont care about the current economic state, if you cant afford it, perhaps you should spend your time looking for a better job versus searching for women on the internet. gah
it might be snotty or even wrong, but if a man doesnt invest something in his search he really isnt that serious to begin with.


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Mar 3, 2010)

verucassault said:


> meh, i am so over internet dating, or dating in general.
> although i had a serious 2 year relationship that was a result of bbwdatefinder, i just cant get with it.
> i went back on that site and all i found were men into playing games and sending winks.
> 
> ...




My personal faves are the ones that don't have paid memberships but hope that I do so they tell me to PM them.


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## cooljoeyd (Mar 4, 2010)

Maybe Dimensions should make a singles forum?


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## Keb (Mar 4, 2010)

I agree that it should be okay for the girls to do the asking, and that some guys would really prefer it. But for me...I don't ask anymore, because I know that my weight is going to be an issue for most guys. I can't pick out an FA from any other guy, so how am I going to know which one to hit on? On the other hand, an FA can certainly tell I'm fat. 

Aside from that, I -am- an old-fashioned girl in a lot of ways. I appreciate a bit of chivalry, even if I'm a bit clumsy around it since it's so unusual for me. I don't expect the guys to pay for everything or do all the work...but I like the guy to be the one who makes the first move. It tells me a lot about his interest, his masculinity, and his sense of humor.


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Mar 4, 2010)

I'm like you Keb....have found that letting them come to me is often time best. 
Don't mind flirting but there's a lot of digging to be done on those sites so rather just work on narrowing the field rather than getting struck down too often.

When on non-bbw dating sites, I make sure there is always a line about not being thin....and that if a person prefers/needs thin, then to not respond. That usually is enough.


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## lifeneedsmore (Mar 6, 2010)

I met my husband on curvydates.com. Not only that, but he was in Canada and I in Texas. We've been happily married for almost 6 years now. I did a LOT of internet before I found him. I was seperated from my first husband for 3 years prior to finding Rick and I had a lot of fun trying to find him. I'm still friends with several men that I dated during that period in my life. Maybe I was lucky, but I loved being single and dating and I love being married to my sweetie.


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## That Guy You Met Once (Mar 8, 2010)

Approaching women and starting a basic convo isn't all that hard. 

Strangely enough, no one (that I've seen) has mentioned the actual hard part - finding a BBW, outside dedicated communities which are usually online, that enjoys having attention called to her weight, or is willing to go for a BHM.

If you're lucky, you might find one for every 10-20 women you approach, depending on your area.

Also, I totally agree with cooljoeyd. The singles thread is more for complaining about your status then fixing it, and the match service kind of looks like a morgue these days.


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