# Severe Swelling/Bloating



## BeautifulPoeticDisaster

Just curious....

I've been having issues....still...with my abdomen. I am really bloated in my calves, tummy and even forearms. I can't take diuretics cos I have gout. Dr. said it wouldn't help in the tummy anyways. My tummy is always hard even when I wake up in the morning.

I have never had my forearms swell. They aren't hugely swollen, but enough to cause discomfort.

My other symptoms are: light headed, nausea,discomfort to lay on tummy (so much so that I took a prego test again..it's still way negative thank god!) heartburn off and on in like 20 minute bouts, swelling like a puffer fish, grouchy, headaches, pounding heart (although this was after walking up a flight of stairs, it still freaked me out)

I am not a hypochondriac but I have a simular thing....I am terrfired of being ill and terrified of dying young...so I try to diagnose myself and it just makes my hysterical side even worse. Dr. Google can't help me this time so I am wondering what you guys think it could possibly be.

Could this all just be terrible freaking pms????? or does it sound more like congestive heart failure, or wheat intolerance? (my 2 best guesses)

I know I sound like a nut case, lol, but I'm not...I really do have all these crap symptoms, and the medical side of things is run differently here. I haven't have my blood pressure taken since I left the hospital in Feb. And as someone on meds for it, I would think they would at least check it once in a while!!!!


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## SamanthaNY

BBS, these symptoms sound very worrisome to me. Have you been to your doctor about them already?


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## Sandie_Zitkus

Donni I think you need to have an EKG - just to make sure it's NOT your heart. I just found out I have some heart problems in the very, very early stages and I am sooo glad I found out early.

Make your doctor do a complete physical. And BTW I have had gout too and you can take Aldactone which is an old diuretic that will not raise uric acid levels.

But I'm not a doctor I just play one on TV!


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## Miss Vickie

So, have you seen a doctor about this? Besides Google, I mean?  The list of things it COULD be are so long I wouldn't even know where to start. Except that blood work would be a really good idea to see what your sodium and other electrolyte levels are. That's where I'd start, and maybe an EKG, but always first of all a physical exam.

It's not that unusual if you're on BP meds to not get seen all the time. Usually they'll have you come in for a follow up or two initially but once it's stabilized they don't need to see you. That being said, I think that if you have blood pressure issues, you should be taking your own blood pressure regularly. 

This kind of swelling is NOT normal and NOT healthy and a doctor worth his or her weight in duck feathers let alone salt would want to see you and do some testing.

Please see someone, and let us know what it is. I'm concerned about you.


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## prettyssbbw

aww bbssbbw,i am sorry to hear you are having all these problems.
I know what you mean about the fear of dying young. I am terrified of
dying young also. BUT here is my advice to you that i try myself to follow.

1) Step away from Google. You will only end up stressing yourself more with searching and thinking well maybe i have this..or no,this...

2) Go to the doc and force them to take your BP and do a complete examination and take a blood panel. And an EKG. I hate the way doctors are these days UGHHH!  

3) Relax.Find something that you like to do that totally takes all your stress away.

4) Try to take a walk everyday.I take short ones once a day. It gets the good vibes going and my mood improves.

I have the discomfort in the tummy thing going .I used to love sleeping on my tummy but now i can't. I got it checked out and mine turned out being a hernia.ugh. Is it hot there right now? I know in the heat i tend to swell up.I know i am rambling on but i hope that my post at least helps you a little.
If you ever want to chat about or anything just PM me and i will let you know my yahoo. HUGS and take care! Natasha


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## Sandie S-R

I understand that you can't take diuretics. However there are a couple of things you can do to help at the moment. First, cut out all salt. Period. Stay away from canned goods, soups, and processed foods they are high in sodium. You need to stop the swelling as soon as you can. Drink a bit more water to help with flushing the system. And try some natural diuretics, like asparagus. It works very well for a many of us. 

And most important, call your Doc and make an appt a.s.a.p. If it is something like congestive heart failure, then it needs to be treated quickly. 

Hang in there sweetie, and let us know how you do.


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## BeautifulPoeticDisaster

Well I have changed my "diet" dramtically. I have reduced dramatically the amount of salt in diet....as in I am eating no processed foods nor am I adding slat to anything. I have also done away with sugar since I know that isn't helping anything and is stressing out my system.

Having said that, last time I swore off sugar I went through heroin type withdrawals...sweats, shakes, headaches etc. So I'm going to be a bitch for a while.

I do need to see the doctor. They seem to not to have any appointments available for the next year...ok 2 weeks. I'm not sure what to do. I'm trying not to worry and I am changing my diet for me for a change. I'm already less swollen today.

Thanks everyone for your support. I am going to do what I can to get into the doctors soon.


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## Emma

If you ring up as soon as the doctors opens every morning they should have some cancelations so you should be able to get a quicker apointment that way.


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## Tracyarts

I'm dealing with the same thing.

I was retaining dangerous amounts of fluid. I had pitting edema in my lower legs and a patch of tough rubbery flesh with pitting edema almost the size of a plate below my belly button. My entire body was puffy as well. I was also having trouble moving, no stamina, out of breath, and just uncomfortable.

My doctor immediately suspected congestive heart failure but it was ruled out by a cardiologist. They then decided that it had to be a side effect of taking the drug Avandamet for insulin resistance. I went off the Avandamet and back onto Metformin and within weeks I lost a significant amount of excess fluid. But... my next monthly cycle brought even more serious fluid retention at PMS time, which I still have right now. 

The guess is that this is PMS related and it should go away on its own as my cycle progresses and my hormones settle down. But if it is still this bad in a week, I am being sent to a pulomonary specialist to see if they have a clue what is causing it now. 

So I am severely restricting salt (hard to do when you are premenstrual but I am trying my best), and trying to be as active as I can, as well as sleeping with my feet elevated above my heart and trying to keep my legs up as much as possible during the day. 

It is definately a royal pain in the butt. I can totally sympathize and I hope you get good news from the doctor and get it taken care of and under control soon.

Tracy


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## SamanthaNY

BBS, I've sent you a private message on this subject.


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## BeaBea

BigBellySSBBW said:


> I do need to see the doctor. They seem to not to have any appointments available for the next year...ok 2 weeks. I'm not sure what to do. I'm trying not to worry and I am changing my diet for me for a change. I'm already less swollen today.



Babe, 

the Medical system here is very different to what you are used to and, on top of that, all Doctors run their Surgeries differently. 

Firstly, if you cant get an appointment to see your Doctor try using the NHS Direct telephone line. They have trained medical staff (Actual Nurses, not just people with a dumb piece of paper) who will talk you through your symptoms and recommend your next steps. If they decide you need to see your Doctor sooner they can book a next-day appointment with them on your behalf. Their website is here and their phone no is 0845 4647. They're available 24/7.

Secondly, you dont need to make an appointment to see the Doctor to get your BP taken. Ring and ask for an appointment with the Practice Nurse and ask her to take it. If she's at all concerned she'll get you straight in to see a Doctor.

Third, are you sure they're not making you wait two weeks to see a named, personal Doctor? If you ring and say you're happy to see any of the Doctors on staff (assuming you are!) then you'll often get an appointment quicker. Popular Doctors, especially female ones, are very busy.

Hope that helps a bit and that you're feeling better.

Tracey xx


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## BeautifulPoeticDisaster

BeaBea said:


> Babe,
> 
> the Medical system here is very different to what you are used to and, on top of that, all Doctors run their Surgeries differently.
> 
> Firstly, if you cant get an appointment to see your Doctor try using the NHS Direct telephone line. They have trained medical staff (Actual Nurses, not just people with a dumb piece of paper) who will talk you through your symptoms and recommend your next steps. If they decide you need to see your Doctor sooner they can book a next-day appointment with them on your behalf. Their website is here and their phone no is 0845 4647. They're available 24/7.
> 
> Secondly, you dont need to make an appointment to see the Doctor to get your BP taken. Ring and ask for an appointment with the Practice Nurse and ask her to take it. If she's at all concerned she'll get you straight in to see a Doctor.
> 
> Third, are you sure they're not making you wait two weeks to see a named, personal Doctor? If you ring and say you're happy to see any of the Doctors on staff (assuming you are!) then you'll often get an appointment quicker. Popular Doctors, especially female ones, are very busy.
> 
> Hope that helps a bit and that you're feeling better.
> 
> Tracey xx


 
Yeah you are right. I'm not used to 10 min dr appointments where they don't take your BP and temp everytime. I think it's odd. However, my doctor never listens to me. When I said I thought I had a miscarrage, she did nothing, asked no questions, didn't take a test, nothing. 3 days later I was in hospital with Ectopic. Then I called in with a sore toe and she told me it was probably bruised. The next night I was in the after hours Dr and being diagnosed with gout. Last time I was at the Dr a month ago I told her I had a pain on my right side (where my liver should be) and I felt bloated. She did nothing. These symptoms have gotten much worse and have other things now...and I'm just afraid I am talking to a brick wall with her.

On a positive note, I think the appointment I got for early next week is with someone else. I pray it is with someone else. Someone who cares if I live. I seriously feel like I have been given a death sentence in this country.

It is good to know that I can get my BP read by asking for a nurse. I haven't had my BP read since I was in hospital. I need to get my own cuff, you are right. I will order one when I am in the States in August. 

Thanxs for your help.

Sorry I sound so bitchy, lol. No sugar, no salt, no caffine, little carbs makes for a very grouchy me right now, lol.


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## BeaBea

Noooo! Thats terrible! When you make an appointment is perfectly ok to say which Doctor you want. Lots of people have a good rapport with the Doctor they know, other people just want the first appointment they can get. Ask the receptionist when you ring (and yes, she will be snotty about it but ignore it, it seems to be written into their job description or something in this Country)

Also, do try the NHS phone line. Its free and they are a great source of current, and more importantly, RELIABLE information. The Health service here can be very variable but this part actually seems to work well! 

And dont worry about being grumpy - anyone would be so no apologies needed!

Tracey xx


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## Sandie_Zitkus

Donni - speaking from recent experience if you are having pain on your right side upper right abdomen - you absolutely need to have your gall bladder checked. ASAP - since it is not going away. Mine got enflamed and it was not fun. I went to the ER - can you do that?????


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## TearInYourHand

I second what Sandie has said. This could be serious. It does sound like the location of the gall bladder. Get yourself to the ER! I am worried about you!!


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## Miss Vickie

BigBellySSBBW said:


> Last time I was at the Dr a month ago I told her I had a pain on my right side (where my liver should be) and I felt bloated. She did nothing. These symptoms have gotten much worse and have other things now...and I'm just afraid I am talking to a brick wall with her.



Epigastric pain like you're describing is a big warning bell, especially coupled with swelling. Maybe it's because I care for pregnant women with preeclampsia who can quickly go down hill from liver damage associated with it, but those symptoms you describe are anything but reassuring.

If you feel you must wait 'till next week, okay, but in the meantime I think you should do as Tracey suggests and call the NHS Nursie Line and let them walk you through your symptoms. Please. I'm very concerned about you.


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## BeaBea

I know this is a bit cynical but it's only just occurred to me...

When you ring the NHS phone line they CANT start making immediate assumptions about your health and cause of symptoms from your appearance. If the question of weight comes up then obviously it's only responsible to tell the truth, but right up until that point they have to judge you purely on the information you present. If weight isnt a directly contributing factor to the condition they suspect and the question isn't discussed then you'd get the same diagnosis as someone weighing 110lbs. 

I'm not saying your own Dr made assumptions, but lets face it, it wouldn't be the first time it had happened to one of us!

Note: I'm not suggesting anyone be the slightest bit deceptive when discussing their issues as it would clearly be self-defeating - but for once the playing field is completely level!

So - have you rung them yet...? (Why can I always hear my Mothers voice when I nag? lol)

Tracey xx


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## BeautifulPoeticDisaster

well...I went to the doctor today. 

It still wasn't what I expected, BUT...I realise that I am not in America anymore and things are done WAY WAY WAY differently here.

It started out quite funny. I feel rather assertive today and I'm not sure if that's cos my new plan of eating has cleansed me out and I'm thinking clearly or if I just woke up feeling uber good. Either way, I like this feeling. Anyways, as Mike and I walked up to the Dr's surgery a old man stared at me...you know STARED at me, lol..disapproving look and all....instead of feeling bad like I normally would, I looked to Mike and loudly said "I hate it when rude people stare at me" lol..stupid I know, but I felt better for it.

Anyways...the medical stuff. I saw a good Dr...I really like her, I have seen her twice now. She said that it is not likely my liver cos I have had blood tests since the ectopic and all my bits are normal, she is however thinking it could be gallbladder and is referring me for a scan.  It is SOMETHING! I swear....

The chest pains, heart pounding thing she said could be anxiety. She said it is worth keeping an eye on, but the pain in my abdomen is the main thing right now. She took my pulse and listened to my heart. She didn't seem worried.

I dunno. I hope I am ok. No one else seems worried, including Mike...so I guess I should just ignore things until they go away?

On a positive note....my legs swell up still but only a little bit!!! I have cut out 99.9% of salt in my life and believe it or not, that's hard to do!!! Salt exists just as much as sugar does in everything, lol. Aw well..it is worth it, my legs don't hurt all the effing time And I have elimintated sugar as well...my eating life is a bitch right now, lol. In America they have loads of sugarfree things to choose from, even ice cream...not here...I'm having to tough it out.

On a funny note...I died my hair a magenta colour...but I also dyed my entire bathroom and every inch of my body, lol. No seriously, this isn't like dye in a box where it just comes off with some scrubbing...this is actual purple stained skin, lol. Mike just looks at me and laughs, lol. I got some stuff from Sally's that is supposed to help...and it did..it took the first 2 layers off, lol, there are still several more. My whole neck is purple! Thank god it isn't hot cos I have to wear turtle necks, lol.

Sorry for the ramble....


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## BeaBea

BigBellySSBBW said:


> No one else seems worried, including Mike...so I guess I should just ignore things until they go away?



No babe, just monitor things carefully - and if anything gets worse, or even if you just start feeling non-specifically 'off' for no reason then you go straight back and hurry them up with the scan. I'm so glad you're feeling good today though and hope this continues for you!

Well done for going, and YAY for seeing a nice Doctor! And also for giving the rude person something to think about.

Tracey xx


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## Emma

Boots has a range of diabetic sugar free stuff.


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## HottiMegan

BigBellySSBBW said:


> well...I went to the doctor today.
> 
> It still wasn't what I expected, BUT...I realise that I am not in America anymore and things are done WAY WAY WAY differently here.
> 
> It started out quite funny. I feel rather assertive today and I'm not sure if that's cos my new plan of eating has cleansed me out and I'm thinking clearly or if I just woke up feeling uber good. Either way, I like this feeling. Anyways, as Mike and I walked up to the Dr's surgery a old man stared at me...you know STARED at me, lol..disapproving look and all....instead of feeling bad like I normally would, I looked to Mike and loudly said "I hate it when rude people stare at me" lol..stupid I know, but I felt better for it.
> 
> Anyways...the medical stuff. I saw a good Dr...I really like her, I have seen her twice now. She said that it is not likely my liver cos I have had blood tests since the ectopic and all my bits are normal, she is however thinking it could be gallbladder and is referring me for a scan.  It is SOMETHING! I swear....
> 
> The chest pains, heart pounding thing she said could be anxiety. She said it is worth keeping an eye on, but the pain in my abdomen is the main thing right now. She took my pulse and listened to my heart. She didn't seem worried.
> 
> I dunno. I hope I am ok. No one else seems worried, including Mike...so I guess I should just ignore things until they go away?
> 
> On a positive note....my legs swell up still but only a little bit!!! I have cut out 99.9% of salt in my life and believe it or not, that's hard to do!!! Salt exists just as much as sugar does in everything, lol. Aw well..it is worth it, my legs don't hurt all the effing time And I have elimintated sugar as well...my eating life is a bitch right now, lol. In America they have loads of sugarfree things to choose from, even ice cream...not here...I'm having to tough it out.
> 
> On a funny note...I died my hair a magenta colour...but I also dyed my entire bathroom and every inch of my body, lol. No seriously, this isn't like dye in a box where it just comes off with some scrubbing...this is actual purple stained skin, lol. Mike just looks at me and laughs, lol. I got some stuff from Sally's that is supposed to help...and it did..it took the first 2 layers off, lol, there are still several more. My whole neck is purple! Thank god it isn't hot cos I have to wear turtle necks, lol.
> 
> Sorry for the ramble....



I have been thinking about you and wondering if there were any answers yet. I am glad that you are getting answers. It also sounds like cutting the sugar and salt is helping. I know it's a bitch stopping that stuff. I have been doing it. I got to the point that i CRAVED salt and added a little back over time because i was so miserable. 

Did you use Manic Panic? I used to dye my hair with that stuff and my mom hated how the bathroom got so messed up! That's some brutal stuff for dying skin and surroundings.


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## BeautifulPoeticDisaster

HottiMegan said:


> I have been thinking about you and wondering if there were any answers yet. I am glad that you are getting answers. It also sounds like cutting the sugar and salt is helping. I know it's a bitch stopping that stuff. I have been doing it. I got to the point that i CRAVED salt and added a little back over time because i was so miserable.
> 
> Did you use Manic Panic? I used to dye my hair with that stuff and my mom hated how the bathroom got so messed up! That's some brutal stuff for dying skin and surroundings.


 

Oh no...this is WAY worse than manic panic!!!! I have used Punky Colours, Manic panic and some other random things...but this...this is a mess. It is Scream and you can buy it in Sally's. I did my hair red about a month ago with no problems...I do know how to colour hair, lol...but this time omfg! I did it on Sunday morning and today is Wednesday and my shampoo is STILL bright purple, my neck up pase my jaw line is still pink!!! It's a serious mess!!! I have scrubbed my neck raw, and each morning it is only a little less pink!  I will just have exfoliate it all off day by day. Never again will I used that brand/colour EVER!!!

But yeah. I'm getting myself sorted medically. I do miss salt especially on meat...omg we have steak the other night and it was so gross without salt, lol, but I ate it, with my sugar free ketchup, lol. My legs aren't swollen and they used to get painfully swollen so this is worth it to me I miss chocolate, alot.


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## Sandie_Zitkus

> I dunno. I hope I am ok. No one else seems worried, including Mike...so I guess I should just ignore things until they go away?



NO NO NO NO NO NO!!! Donni please do not just ignore this. If it is gall bladder it could get enflamed (which is what happened to me). You could jaundice, it could gangreen, it could effect you pancreas. PLEASE get this doctor to move more quickly.

Honey I am very worried about you. Really - sometimes YOU have to light a fire under the doctors ass! And sweetie just to be safe have an EKG - just to be safe.


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## SamanthaNY

BigBellySSBBW said:


> well...I went to the doctor today.
> 
> Anyways...the medical stuff.
> referring me for a scan
> She took my pulse and listened to my heart



Is this all she did? No blood tests? No EKG? No chest x-ray?


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## Sandie_Zitkus

SamanthaNY said:


> Is this all she did? No blood tests? No EKG? No chest x-ray?



I'm right there with you Sammy - I'm appalled this is all she did.


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## BeautifulPoeticDisaster

SamanthaNY said:


> Is this all she did? No blood tests? No EKG? No chest x-ray?



Welcome to the hell of the NHS. Her words to me were "lets deal with one thing at a time"

So yeah...now you know why it feels like no one is listening to me. I miss American medicine...it may cost an arm and a leg, but ya know they did a a good job at checking me over.


I had insurance though so it didn't cost too much and I got used to that quality of care.

I was told that if I have anymore chest pains to come back to the GP's office. Fuck that, it I am having chest pains, next time I will be off to A&E (the ER)


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## SamanthaNY

And what would happen if you insist on having more tests? Sorry to sound like doom - but if you _wait _until you're having chest pain.... well, ya know? 

What happens with good ol' American foot-stomping insistence?


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## HottiMegan

BigBellySSBBW said:


> Oh no...this is WAY worse than manic panic!!!! I have used Punky Colours, Manic panic and some other random things...but this...this is a mess. It is Scream and you can buy it in Sally's. I did my hair red about a month ago with no problems...I do know how to colour hair, lol...but this time omfg! I did it on Sunday morning and today is Wednesday and my shampoo is STILL bright purple, my neck up pase my jaw line is still pink!!! It's a serious mess!!! I have scrubbed my neck raw, and each morning it is only a little less pink!  I will just have exfoliate it all off day by day. Never again will I used that brand/colour EVER!!!
> 
> But yeah. I'm getting myself sorted medically. I do miss salt especially on meat...omg we have steak the other night and it was so gross without salt, lol, but I ate it, with my sugar free ketchup, lol. My legs aren't swollen and they used to get painfully swollen so this is worth it to me I miss chocolate, alot.



man that seriously sucks! I hope the color comes out of your skin soon. That would be a little weird having dyed skin.

Food is so bland without salt. The diet plan I'm on says if you need salt don't put it in while cooking and just use it on your dish. It cuts the salt usage down by like 3/4. It is so hard eating no/low sodium. I applaud your effort!


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## HottiMegan

BigBellySSBBW said:


> Welcome to the hell of the NHS. Her words to me were "lets deal with one thing at a time"
> 
> So yeah...now you know why it feels like no one is listening to me. I miss American medicine...it may cost an arm and a leg, but ya know they did a a good job at checking me over.
> 
> 
> I had insurance though so it didn't cost too much and I got used to that quality of care.
> 
> I was told that if I have anymore chest pains to come back to the GP's office. Fuck that, it I am having chest pains, next time I will be off to A&E (the ER)



man. I sure hope that they stop sitting on their hands about you. I mean tackling one thing at a time is a good thing but you'd think that they'd be concerned about chest pains!


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## BeaBea

BigBellySSBBW said:


> Welcome to the hell of the NHS. Her words to me were "lets deal with one thing at a time"
> So yeah...now you know why it feels like no one is listening to me. I miss American medicine...it may cost an arm and a leg, but ya know they did a a good job at checking me over.



Hey babe,

Sorry to be blunt here but the NHS is like every public healthcare system and its very overstretched. There are things it does really well and there are also glaring great holes in it too. By all means raise legitimate concerns but in my experience foot-stomping will not achieve the best results. Its an English system and you need to think 'English' to get the best from it.

Also, the 'American' option IS available to you - just ring BUPA and they'll whip you into a lovely clean hospital straight away and run any and every test you fancy. I'm afraid that you'll be charged for it though and as you can imagine it wont be cheap.

You are right about A&E though - and thats one of the areas which works well!

Tracey xx


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## Sandie_Zitkus

Tracey,

I'm not sure if you are seeing this as a British vs Ameican thing but I think it's more about Donni getting proper care. She should not be put on the back burner - chest pains are nothing to fool around with and neither is abdominal pain. When I was in the hospital I was told the reason why they were doing so many tests so quickly is abdominal pain can be related to heart trouble. Taking Donni's pulse and listening to her heart is ridiculous.

Why not tell her *HOW* to get the care she needs. What's happening to her is outrageous IMO.

Sandie Z



BeaBea said:


> Hey babe,
> 
> Sorry to be blunt here but the NHS is like every public healthcare system and its very overstretched. There are things it does really well and there are also glaring great holes in it too. By all means raise legitimate concerns but in my experience foot-stomping will not achieve the best results. Its an English system and you need to think 'English' to get the best from it.
> 
> Also, the 'American' option IS available to you - just ring BUPA and they'll whip you into a lovely clean hospital straight away and run any and every test you fancy. I'm afraid that you'll be charged for it though and as you can imagine it wont be cheap.
> 
> You are right about A&E though - and thats one of the areas which works well!
> 
> Tracey xx


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## BeaBea

Sandie_Zitkus said:


> Why not tell her *HOW* to get the care she needs. What's happening to her is outrageous IMO.
> Sandie Z



Umm, if you read down the thread a bit I have tried to ease BBSSBBW through some of the labyrinths of the UK NHS as best I can. 

I'm only trying to point out that there are huge cultural differences between the UK and the US and foot-stomping is very unlikely to achieve a helpful result. Also first class health care is available here immediately if you have the cash, but if you cant pay (and I know I cant) you're stuck with an overworked system which is trying to do its best. 

The suggestions I made below WILL help.

Tracey xx


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## SocialbFly

i beg to differe...what is being done for Donni is exactly how they would proceed, several things mimic the heart...and if the blood pressure is ok, and the histroy is ok, and she doesnt have any other issues (the swelling is resolving with diet change) then they would work on the gallbladder issues and the hiatal hernia issue. we women are lucky in that unless there is a significant heart history in women in the family, our hormones generally protect us, until around 10 years post menopause, when we have to be more cautious about our health...several girls in our unit have had chest pain (i think some of it is stress anxiety too...but....) and they started with the easy things and went to the deeper things later....

but that being said, of course, Donni, if you have chest pain that radiates or chest pain that feels like an elephant is on your chest, or severe unrelenting nausea...go to the er...but just know, with someone your age, they check other things out too...but i dont know why an ekg would be an issue...seems like that is cheap and easy to do...so next time, insist on one...


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## Emma

I believe BUPA do insurence so you could get your health care the same way you do in the US. Pay a premium and get the best healthcare.


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## BeautifulPoeticDisaster

I'm not even sure where to start replying...

Tracy: Thank you for all your ideas and help in getting the care I need after hours...very helpful indeed.

Tracy and Em: I WISH I could afford insurance and even if I could, companies don't give insurance to super fat people. In the US I had jobs that paid well AND had full benifits which included health care...that's how I got spoiled. The only thing that bothers me is the Dr's have blown me off twice already and in those 2 instances it ended up being something critical...and what if this time they have blown me off and it is more than critical??? That is my concern.

Sandy: Thank you for your concern. I am closely listening to my body and the first sign of trouble, I will drive myself to emergency if I have to! 

Socialb: They didn't take my BP...haven't done for over 6 months. And my swelling in my legs has gone down with diet, my abdomin is still swollen.

my goal now is to get thin enough to afford one seat on planes so I can go to America when I feel sick!!! (KIDDING!) 

I just wish Dr's trusted me to know my body enough to know when something isn't right.


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## SocialbFly

you know what Donni, we all wish that, but on the flip side, you would NOT believe how many hypochondriacs there are out there, good lord, lol

there would be no money in health care at all, cause they would be doing every test known to man, lol....


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## Miss Vickie

Donni, I hope you're feeling better and continue to experience less swelling. It's a little worrisome to me that they didn't take your blood pressure (given that it's a problem -- even here in the US of A you can't have a fractured ankle looked at without having your BP assessed). Have you thought about getting your own cuff to take it yourself? There are some good "do it your selfers" that are cheap; maybe you could even get one here in the US when you come visit?

Tracey, thanks for pointing out the differences in the system. You're right -- here in America it's foot stomping that gets you taken care of, and people who aren't willing to stand up for themselves often get the short end of the stick, health-wise. Especially fat folks. How does one do it "English style"? Is it just old fashioned perseverance? And I can totally understand them not *totally* working her up for heart stuff, given her age and gender. In a system with limited funds, a young woman is very low risk for something like a heart attack. OTOH, we all know it can happen (and in fact we're told that because of our size it WILL happen) and here in the US because it's been missed they work hard to "leave no stone unturned" when it comes to things like chest pain in particular. The differences in our systems are interesting to me, and a paradigm shift that Americans will have to deal with should we ever get socialized medicine.

Donni, be sure and let us know what the scan shows, and if you start feeling badly again I'm glad you're going to be sure and get seen.


----------



## SamanthaNY

Any updates? 

Hope you're doing okay...


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## SocialbFly

updates?? i know you travel soon, how ya doin?


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## BeautifulPoeticDisaster

Updates...it's a S L O W process, lol. Just this morning I got my blood drawn to check for liver/kidney function...then next Friday I go for an ultra sound. The bad news is, it still hurts...the good news is...it still hurts, lol. Nothing worse than finally getting to the Dr and everything has sorted itself out. I'm still doing great on the no salt, no sugar thing...so my legs swell less but I still have some abdominal swelling which is a bit worrysome.

On the good health front I had my first/having my first period since the ectopic...and it isn't nearly as painful as what I read it would be...so that is nice. Lasting a bit longer but I can handle that as long as I never have to go through pain like that again.

I will keep you all updated to what is going on. I'm still having severe bowl issues. Not so much gas anymore that I have cut bran flakes out of my life, lol, but I have really bad hurry-quick-get-to-the-toilet issues and it usually happens the 2 hours that follow lunch. And for lunch I have a salad with some sort of protien on it be it chicken breast, tuna, or ham...so I dunno...my body has gone mad.

I'm a bit less worried now though. I think not eating sugar has cleared out my brain. I'm less anxious about things and happier in general.  

Thanks for asking me to update...I've been lurking about the past week not really feeling the urge to post.

And yes I do travel soon. 6 weeks!!!! Nothing is going to keep me away from America, lol. I won't get to go again for a long while unless we win the lottery that we fail to get tickets for, lol.


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## SamanthaNY

Ah, thanks for catching us up - I would say this falls into the 'no news is good news' category in that you're still status quo, and pursuing tests, etc. I assume you're keeping up fluids to balance the bowel issue, right? 

I hope you have told your doc about your travel plans. If not... please do. The stress of traveling, airplane pressure, cramped quarters and lack of movement during a flight... all have effects on any body. On _fat _bodies, as you know, it's a bit different, and if one is health compromised, it's harder still. Just want you to be fully protected! 

Continued wishes and thoughts for your good health... and if you don't update us, we'll bug you!


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## BeaBea

Donni,

If you think about the problems you've had and the changes you've made recently your body must have gone through a period of incredible change. But less swelling, periods, happiness - these are all fantastic signs and I hope the recovery continues!



Miss Vickie said:


> Tracey, thanks for pointing out the differences in the system. You're right -- here in America it's foot stomping that gets you taken care of, and people who aren't willing to stand up for themselves often get the short end of the stick, health-wise. Especially fat folks. How does one do it "English style"? Is it just old fashioned perseverance?



Lol, yes, old-fashioned perseverance. Being polite and resolute and absolutely refusing to go away will always beat English bureaucracy. We're allergic to giving our names too - so if you encounter a problem ask for someones name, let them see you write it down (check spelling if you feel like being really bitchy) and then ask who they report to. 

Being quietly polite and smiling while delivering the killing blow is the English way - it's why we make such good villains in movies  

Tracey xx


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## loggamatt

I'm afraid I don't have any good advice for Donni that's not already been mentioned, although it sounds like you're feeling a bit better so long may that continue!

I just wanted to weigh in on the whole US V UK system of healthcare. Not because I feel particularly patriotic about the NHS, but just because I personally believe that while the US system is great for some, it's woefully inadequate for many. So I wouldn't want this thread to put any Americans reading off supporting calls for a more universal healthcare system in the US. Also, I wouldn't want to put off any BBW visiting the UK! 

One thing to keep in mind is that just because US hospitals may run a hundred different tests right from the initial consult doesn't necessarily mean that all of those tests are necessary, or even useful. It merely means that the hospital can charge for the tests, either to the patient directly or their insurance, and thus make profit.

Therefore, a British hospital may not run the same number of tests if they feel they're unneccessary as they do not profit from the tests being carried out. Now, you could say "I don't care! I just want as many tests run on me as possible to ease my mind, I don't care why the hospital is running them", which is fair enough. But, personally, I wouldn't want to be subjected to endless testing unless my doctor believed that it was really necessary.

Doctors here are subject to the same sorts of checks and reviews as doctors are in the US, and also take the same oath, so I very much doubt that a doctor would be negligent and refuse tests that are necessary. I guess it happens, but I doubt that's a UK specific thing.

My personal experience of the NHS (and the experiences of others I've spoken to) is that it's very good when it comes to critical/life threatening things. Therefore emergency rooms tend to be good. Also, for things like heart problems or cancer the NHS is good. If, on the other hand, you need to be referred to a specialist in something a little less critical... plastic surgery for example... the NHS isn't so good.

All I know is that I recently lost my job, and am still entitled to the same healthcare as I was when working. So I'm a fan of universal healthcare through taxation!

Anyway, Donni, I wouldn't be too worried that they haven't rushed you into hospital to perform every test under the sun... if that was the correct procedure I'm sure they would have done it.

So, while I know everyone is just trying to look out for Donni, I'm not sure that saying "oh my god! Those horrible negligent British doctors aren't doing the right tests!" is doing much except increasing her worry. I don't mean this to sound harsh, but, I would trust doctors with years of medical training to make a better assessment than people on a message board.

Anyway, just my 2 cents (or 2 pence! lol)...


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## BeautifulPoeticDisaster

Matt, 

I can appriceiate what you are saying. The NHS is a good system. However, I wasn't crying because they won't run every test under the sun. They wouldn't even fucking look or feel my side where I had the pain. They ARE being negligent. After 2 months of complaining I finally got a blood test and an ultrasound scheduled. How can the NHS be good if you have cancer when they won't even do tests that could possibly spot it early on?

Your post really hurt my feelings. You make me sound like a whiny bitch. This doctor has already put my life at risk once. Seriously. Go read how dangerous an ectopic pregnancy is. She completely blew me off when I told her I thought I was having a miscarriage. I'm sorry if I don't trust her anymore. She almost killed me in her negligence.

I do agree that the US healthcare is mostly about money. But all I want is someone to care that I have a mysterious pain in my side that will not go away and I have constant yellow diarrhoea that doesn't change with any dietary changes. Those 2 things are NOT normal and warrant some sort of exam...not just a "you're ok, come back if it continues" That is NOT ok.

I am really tired of having to defend my right to health care. I just want ONE exam. I just want SOMETHING. I am not demanding everything under the sun like you presume I am. The doctors here have not done shit for me. The nurses on the NHS are awesome, the Doctors on the other hand, I have nothing good to say about them. It IS about money for them as well. They get paid for every patient they see which is why a doctors appointment is only 10 minutes long and does not include taking the temperature or blood pressure of a patient.

I think the NHS is great for people who do not have a lot to worry about ie not super fat, not pre existing health issues. You are a young strapping lad, of course all you need is the occasional appointment to sort things out. Things are much different through my eyes. I need a profession who will listen to me esp about life threatening things.

Your post really frustrates me. I feel like you are blaming me for the shit treatment I have received. I also realise that there must be great doctors in the NHS but none of them practice anywhere near me. Do you understand that my doctors way of dealing with things almost killed me in February? Do you get that?? I almost DIED. And now, all I want is some help, not every test under the sun. Something in my body is NOT RIGHT and I do not think asking for a diagnosis is wrong of me.


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## Sandie_Zitkus

Donnie sweetie I had the same thing when my gall bladder went bad. I think it's your gall bladder - but I'm not a Doctor.. Is the pain in your upper abdomin? Does your back hurt? Is the pain stopping you from sleeping?

Also I found this - check it out it may or may not be what you have but yellow stool concerned me.

http://www.cdc.gov/ncidod/dpd/parasites/giardiasis/factsht_giardia.htm#transmission


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## loggamatt

Whoa whoa whoa...

I assumed from some of the things you said that you didn't feel that your doctor was being negligent, such as this:-



BigBellySSBBW said:


> Anyways...the medical stuff. I saw a good Dr...I really like her, I have seen her twice now. She said that it is not likely my liver cos I have had blood tests since the ectopic and all my bits are normal, she is however thinking it could be gallbladder and is referring me for a scan.



But now you say this?



> I'm sorry if I don't trust her anymore. She almost killed me in her negligence.



So I apologise if I got the wrong impression of what you were saying in the thread, but I'm having problems understanding how both those statements are consistent.

I got from the thread (admittedly I'm late to it and may have got the wrong impression from skimming it too quickly) that you were naturally worried, as people tend to be when suffering from health problems, and other people were suggesting to you that the doctors were being negligent. That annoyed me because I thought that people suggesting that could increase your worry, which obviously doesn't help your health.

I don't think I called you whiny anywhere, or suggested it. I certainly didn't belittle (or even discuss directly) your current health problems. I am not a doctor and so I have absolutely no idea what an ectopic pregnancy is, and I have no comment or advice to make about that, as I said at the start of my post.

My post was a general defence of the NHS. Partly because I think it is a good (if overstretched) system, and partly because I thought that the charges against the NHS in this thread were coming from other people, not you directly.

The fact still remains that, as others have mentioned, you could still get private treatment in the UK if you were able to pay for it. I believe that as an unemployed person, you would be far worse off in America looking for treatment than you are in the UK.

Now, yes, your size complicates things. Doctors do fob fat people off with a lack of care, thinking that being fat is a disease in itself, so are unwilling to look at anything beyond that. Yes, that happens. But I'm pretty sure from myriad posts I've read on here, that it happens in the US as well. It just depends on whether you have a fat phobic doctor or not. Although I'm smaller than you, to most (if not all) British doctors, I am fat too, so I do understand that first hand. I've had doctors who have been great about it, and doctors who have been not so great about it. I think probably the way to deal with it is to simply ask them politely "are you comfortable treating someone my size or would you rather I see another doctor in this practice?" That would tell the doctor that you're confident and assertive without being pushy (I'm not saying that you are pushy, I'm just reiterating what others have said about, in the abstract, it not being wise to stamp your feet around professionals in the UK), and would challenge him or her to take your health problems seriously.

Believe me, I'm not saying that all British doctors are beyond reproach. I know that some of them are bad, one of them was one of the most prolific serial killers in modern times after all! If you disagree with your doctor's diagnosis, ask for a second opinion from another doctor in their practice.

The bottom line is that someone with your symptoms and medical history should be receiving SOME sort of healthcare. I think it is legitimate to begin with for a doctor to say come back in 2 weeks if the symptoms persist, because in most cases, with most things, the symptoms don't persist. From what I know of medicine, it's a process of gradually eliminating the most likely causes of a problem in making a diagnosis, then treating that diagnosis. So if the problem persists, on the next consult the doctor should refer you for some kind of test (or refer you to a specialist who would take over from there). If that doesn't happen, and the doctor says "yeah, just live with it... see ya later" then I think anyone would agree that you have cause for complaint. 

I've got to be honest, if the doctor is referring you for some sort of test, then I would be inclined to believe he or she knows more about the correct tests to do than people on a message board who haven't examined you. And I don't think that making you worry unnecessarily about whether the level of care you're receiving is appropriate is the kindest thing to do to you right now when you are already LEGITIMATELY worried generally about your health anyway. 

But, if you get from this that I am telling you to shut up and that you're whining about nothing then I guess I must be an asshole. I would have thought you'd know me better than to think I'd be saying that... but, oh well.

Anyway, good luck.


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## BeautifulPoeticDisaster

I'm sorry if I wasn't clear. I am talking about 2 different doctors here.

Doctor A, the negligent one who has on several occasions fobbed me off when I really needed medical attention. She was the one who ignored my complaints about a miscarriage. An ectopic pregnancy is when a fertilized eggs sticks to your tubes or elsewhere inside your body and if left too long you will have ruptured insides and will die from internal bleeding. It is something that happens to thin women as well. However, any doctor with a half a brain would have at least given me a pregnancy test to see if I was still pregnant or if I needed a DnC. But she didn't. I also went to her with the pain in my side. She told me to give it a month. I did.

I saw the second doctor. She actually examined me and is the one referring me to the scan. Sorry if it got confused. They are two different doctors, both of whom are a bit fat phobic even though I am losing weight.

And I do agree healthcare, when unemployed is cheaper here. I never disagreed with that point. When I was put in the hospital for a week because of that cunt joke of a doctor, the staff was pretty awesome. There were a few specticles made of getting me a bed for my size with a scale in etc, but I just chalked it up to the fact that I am really big for the UK. The nurses were attentive as they could be. 

That doctor put me in a very dangerous situation, my vital statistics had to be taken every half an hour to make sure I was not bleeding inside. They gave me a 50% chance of living through that ordeal, so in my mind, that doctor tried to kill me in her negligence, so sorry if I am defensive angry and hurt. I bet you would have a hard time trusting a system that nearly caused you to die.

Sorry I responded the way I did, but I feel like you are victimising the victim here. I just want someone to care if I live and right now, the doctors I have seen here in my surgery do not give a rats ass if this fatty dies.

I have never been a hateful person, but I have a lot of rage against that first doctor and I believe she deserves the worst fate karma can deal out.


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## loggamatt

Ok, well I assume you have made a complaint? If not, you can see a pdf of the complaints procedure here 

I'm still a bit confused though... is the 2nd doctor also in your surgery? If so, it sounds like she is better and does 'give a rats ass if this fatty dies'? Can you not keep seeing her in future? I know that some surgeries now don't let you specify the doctor that you want to see, and I will admit that's a flaw in the NHS. Actually, it's a flaw in the whole New Labour obsession with forcing the NHS to care about reaching certain targets at the expense of common sense management, but I digress... 

I guess we all are, to a certain extent, at the mercy of doctors as they have expertise that we don't. I imagine if you complain, the response will be that your condition was so rare, yet presented with symptoms common in other less rare ailments, that it was common practice to rule out more obvious causes before testing for ectopic pregnancy. 

What do I think about that? No idea. I'm sorry. I have no medical training, so as far as I can see possibly the doctor was negligent and didn't spot the problem quickly enough, or possibly due to the rarity of the ailment it is rarely spotted quickly, and that was the problem. I really don't know, and I don't want to debate you on that. I never did. 

As I said, I posted initially because I felt some of the posting was unneccesarily making you more worried about the treatment you would receive in the NHS and that worry in itself could make things worse. I certainly wasn't attacking or 'victimising' you, and I'm sorry that you got that impression. 

Personally, I would recommend sticking with this new doctor, complaining about the 1st one through the NHS complaints procedure. If you don't get a satisfactory outcome from that, I suppose your next recourse would be litigation. Possibly you could find a legal firm that operates a 'no win, no fee' policy in cases like this, but I don't know. At the very least, I'd imagine a medical lawyer would either have the knowledge to independently assess whether you have a case against the doctor, or would refer you to an independent doctor who would make that assessment. 

Also, perhaps it could be worth writing a letter directly to the first doctor, explaining why you were unhappy with the treatment you received, and asking her to either apologise or explain her decisions. I doubt she'd say "yes, I was negligent", but it may give you an opportunity to study the 'case for the defence' before you submit your complaint and work out the best way to proceed. I'm sure you have already confronted her about it face to face, but it can often be worth writing letters in these situations as it removes the pressure of a face to face meeting, and allows people to come up with a considered response, rather than a 'fight or flight' reaction. 

One other thought, the Citizen's Advice Bureau is a free way to seek guidance on legal issues. Now, I don't know if they deal with medical grievances or not, but it's worth checking out. 

Anyway, I hope it all works out for you, let me know how you're getting on. And I really do hope you can see now that I wasn't attacking you personally. I'm sorry for any confusion.


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## BeautifulPoeticDisaster

Sandie_Zitkus said:


> Donnie sweetie I had the same thing when my gall bladder went bad. I think it's your gall bladder - but I'm not a Doctor.. Is the pain in your upper abdomin? Does your back hurt? Is the pain stopping you from sleeping?
> 
> Also I found this - check it out it may or may not be what you have but yellow stool concerned me.
> 
> http://www.cdc.gov/ncidod/dpd/parasites/giardiasis/factsht_giardia.htm#transmission




Thanks hun, I read the article and I have no idea where I would had contact with human matter. ?? hmm. Was kinda gross, lol.

The pain I have is on my right side about mid was down. The pain doesn't stop me from sleeping, it used to, but since I stopped eating flavors (lol salt and sugar) it hasn't been as painful. That's good news I suppose.

If it is my galbladder then I am thankful it isn't a tumour but in the same breath that means surgery within a system that I do not trust to try to keep me alive. Can living with a damaged gallbladder kill me or will it just hurt? I would rather not have surgery as I am high risk in normal circumstances even worse risk right now. So as you can see I'm in between a rock and a hard place.

Thank you for you care and support. How are you doing btw? Have you had surgery yet? If so, how did it go?


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## SamanthaNY

If your symptoms end up being something with your gall bladder (and I agree, it's sounding like that - but only a physician can tell for sure) an attack can lead to a rupture or other possible complications - obviously that's not something that can go without treatment. This is pretty informative page on gall bladder disease, and some options - but again - _your _doctor will discuss what's best for you. 

I feel for you in dealing with a foreign healthcare system - seems like there's so many differences in culture to understand, all at a time when you're feeling sick and just want help. I'm almost tempted to suggest that you seek help when you're back in America on your trip - but logically, that would be impossible (you won't have insurance coverage here anymore I'm sure) and it would pretty much ruin your vacation. I'm crossing my fingers that you can get this all resolved before then anyway.


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## Sandie_Zitkus

Well, I was told your gall bladder can rupture, it can effect your pancreas (which the Doctor said - "Then your in big trouble" - but that was all he said). Your gall bladder can gangrene and it can also effect your liver. So - no it's not a good idea to just deal with it. IF it is your gall bladder it should come out.

My suggestion to you if they say you need surgery. Find a bariatric surgeon. I would even do that now if I were you so you have the info if you need it. Then if you need it - do what I did - go see him or her and tell them you need their expertise working with supersize people. You do not want WLS (if they say that) and that right now you just want your gall bladder out and you think that takes priority over WLS.

And if you have to have surgery - laparoscopic surgery is the way to go.

No I have not had my surgery yet. It will be next month. But I love my surgeon and I have complete faith in him and I am having my surgery at Baylor University in Dallas - one of the top hospitals in the country.

I wish I could do more for you sweetie. Hang in there.





BigBellySSBBW said:


> Thanks hun, I read the article and I have no idea where I would had contact with human matter. ?? hmm. Was kinda gross, lol.
> 
> The pain I have is on my right side about mid was down. The pain doesn't stop me from sleeping, it used to, but since I stopped eating flavors (lol salt and sugar) it hasn't been as painful. That's good news I suppose.
> 
> If it is my galbladder then I am thankful it isn't a tumour but in the same breath that means surgery within a system that I do not trust to try to keep me alive. Can living with a damaged gallbladder kill me or will it just hurt? I would rather not have surgery as I am high risk in normal circumstances even worse risk right now. So as you can see I'm in between a rock and a hard place.
> 
> Thank you for you care and support. How are you doing btw? Have you had surgery yet? If so, how did it go?


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## marriednotdead

Hi, Had Same Sympyoms Turned Out To Be Gall Stones One Kept Getting Stuck In The Duct Causing Pain Fever And Bright Yellow Loose Stool, I Weigh Close To 400 And The Surgeon Was Fat Phobic And Told Me I Was Taking Ten Years Off My Life Span By Being This Fat , Grandma Still Alive At 96, So Not To Worried About That So He Did Surgery At My Age 43 By Laproscopy I Did Well Even Went To Costco 2 Days Postop So Keep The Faith


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## BeautifulPoeticDisaster

Well today was a big fat waste..and I officially give up. I tried to be proactive about my health, but I give up.

Today was my ultrasound. It started off with me on my back and I expressed concern that the pain I was having was on my side and the tech said "we will get there" and my husband said "be patient". So I was. The tech had me roll onto my side and I though cool, he is going to get it.

NOPE!!! Not only did he miss the spot by an inch, but when I told him so he said that the ultrasound wouldn't read that far down.  Which I know is complete bullshit. He also said that the Dr had requested upper abdomen, fair enough.

However, when it was all said and done, Mike says "you just need to explain it to the dr". That, folks, is when I officially gave up. I have tried in 2 seperate appointments with 2 separate drs to explain it. And I'm not getting anywhere except wasting time on appointments. And to those who suggest the NHS doesn't do unessiccary tests, well they did one this morning.

No one in the medical field in this country will listen to me. I can't afford to go rpivate and I do not have insurance in the states anymore. I tried. Now all that is left is wait until the pain is unbearable and to to the ER (A&E)

Sorry if I'm bitchy, but I am tired of being talked down to by people who think the NHS is great. I realise it IS great for some people. Mike is treated perfectly and promptly, I however, am not. I am tired to telling doctors something is wrong and just having them patronise me by telling me to come back if I still have it. I'm tired of knowing something is wrong with me and not having anyone listen. 

I have no more mental energy left to fight. I have been beat into submission.

If I die because I have some weird illness or even a common one that woulda been ok had I gotten help...well I tried.


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## BeaBea

Donni, 

you're not going to like this, it probably comes under the heading of Tough Love - but it is said with love. 

This is your health. You keep telling us that you know there is something wrong and I sincerely believe you - but I'm not the one that needs to be convinced. I understand that you're in pain and scared and in a foreign country. I also know the NHS lets people down badly from time to time but we are all stuck with what we have and this is not the time to try to fix the entire system. 

You CANT give up. You HAVE to keep trying. I know they are probably speaking down to you and I understand that you feel patronised by some of us here as well but thats no excuse. Go back. KEEP going back. KEEP explaining. Stay patient, as its possible your notes aren't being passed from Doctor to Doctor. DONT assume they know your situation. KEEP telling them. 

Being exhausted by this process is not a good enough excuse to leave the issue alone until it becomes a crisis. Take a day or two to catch your breath, give yourself a pep talk, dig deep and start again. You are too special to too many people to just give up. 

I'm sorry, I'm really sorry, but you can do this. 
Tracey xx


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## TearInYourHand

Donni,

I hope that I'm misreading this but I don't find your husband to be too supportive in your health problems. Does he realize the severity? Have you spoken to him at length?? I guess I'm just appalled that he's not as frustrated as you are.


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## BeautifulPoeticDisaster

TearInYourHand said:


> Donni,
> 
> I hope that I'm misreading this but I don't find your husband to be too supportive in your health problems. Does he realize the severity? Have you spoken to him at length?? I guess I'm just appalled that he's not as frustrated as you are.



It's not that he isn't supportive, it's that he's the in denial, head in the sand type...and it is frustrating that he is the only one I have to lean on...it makes me even more mellow dramatic because even he won't listen to me.

This isn't the first time though. In Feb when I was in the hospital, the consultant gave me a 50% chance of dying and if I had to go to surgery "it didn't look good" I cried, got a bit hysterical, called my mom etc and all he could say was "you are going to be fine". Sometimes I wish he was a lot more understanding and supportive since I have no one else to care about me in this place.


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## BeautifulPoeticDisaster

BeaBea said:


> Donni,
> 
> you're not going to like this, it probably comes under the heading of Tough Love - but it is said with love.
> 
> This is your health. You keep telling us that you know there is something wrong and I sincerely believe you - but I'm not the one that needs to be convinced. I understand that you're in pain and scared and in a foreign country. I also know the NHS lets people down badly from time to time but we are all stuck with what we have and this is not the time to try to fix the entire system.
> 
> You CANT give up. You HAVE to keep trying. I know they are probably speaking down to you and I understand that you feel patronised by some of us here as well but thats no excuse. Go back. KEEP going back. KEEP explaining. Stay patient, as its possible your notes aren't being passed from Doctor to Doctor. DONT assume they know your situation. KEEP telling them.
> 
> Being exhausted by this process is not a good enough excuse to leave the issue alone until it becomes a crisis. Take a day or two to catch your breath, give yourself a pep talk, dig deep and start again. You are too special to too many people to just give up.
> 
> I'm sorry, I'm really sorry, but you can do this.
> Tracey xx




I know Tracey. I wrote the post 10 minutes after coming home from the ultrasound and I was very upset that once again, I have been ignored. And my husband doesn't listen either, I feel very alone in all of this....it makes me want my mommy...someone who will care. I know I am almost 30, but in times of health crisis, I just need something that feels like home.

Thanks for the tough love. It's hard to keep going when ever your partner gives you crap though. If I ignore the problem, it might go away? maybe.

I took your advice though, I have a GP appointment next week with yet a 3rd GP. Lets see how this goes. How do I explain what I have been through, whilst remaining calm with a husband next to me who thinks I am going to be "just fine" and I'm being "psychosomatic". I really need a support system here and I just don't have it. I don't hate being in the UK anymore, but I really miss the family and friends I had that would support me in times like this.


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## kr7

BigBellySSBBW said:


> ......How do I explain what I have been through, whilst remaining calm with a husband next to me who thinks I am going to be "just fine" and I'm being "psychosomatic". I really need a support system here and I just don't have it.....



Hi BigBelly,
For your next doctor's visit you might consider leaving your hubby at home, or at least in the waiting room. It sounds as though he tends to (inadvertently, I am sure) undermine your efforts at being taken seriously. My mom is a seriously ill woman, yet whenever she goes to the doctor with my dad, my dad starts cracking jokes, speaking on her behalf, and generally act as though she was a hypochondriac child. This usually results in my mom not being taken seriously. Last time she was in excruciating pain, she went to the doctor with my dad, and the only solution the doctor and my dad came up with is that the best cure for her pain is a 45 (as in a gun). I know.....hilarious.  Point is, that sometimes it's best to go it alone at the doctor's, without "helpful" family members.

Chris


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## SamanthaNY

Donni (or, anyone) - Are there any services for new arrivals in the UK, or from the American Consulate? Something for travelers? Maybe even a neighbor, or family member on your husband's side? 

I think you need an advocate that will listen to your concerns, allay your fears where necessary, and support you through the UK heath system. Whether this is someone in a professional capacity or a friend/relative, the aim would be to have someone who is already familiar with the NHS giving you support and empathy for what you're experiencing, and help navigating the system.

Anyone know if a service like that exists? 

If not - is there someone on a personal level you can ask? At this point it seems like your frustration and lack of support is almost a bigger obstacle than the health problems, and I'm concerned about a negative synergistic effect.

Just don't be afraid to go to a hospital Emergency Dept. - until someone _listens _to you, that's your safety net.

ETA: I've found two online communities... could these be of any help? UK Health Advocacy and The Commission for Patient and Public Involvement in Health (CPPIH)


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## loggamatt

I've just had an idea, but it's very very possible that this isn't something that can be done, you'd have to look into it. Also, I'm not sure if anything I'm about to suggest is insurance fraud, so, I'd like to make it very clear that I'm not suggesting anyone should do any of this in reality, and this is merely hypothetical 

I wonder if there's any way that a hypothetical person in your position could get treatment in the US if they were going to go back for a trip? My first thought is getting travel insurance (which you should get anyway), and then using the travel insurance to cover the cost of treatment in the US. The problem with this is that 99% of travel insurance policies will exclude pre-existing conditions... so I don't know what sort of ground someone in your position would be on there. If the NHS had not yet diagnosed the pain they were experiencing would it a medically diagnosed pre-existing condition? Not sure... 

But even if it were, I do know that there are travel insurance companies who will still provide travel insurance for some pre-existing conditions... of course, they cost a lot more. But, I'd wager they'd still cost less than paying the full cost of private healthcare.

Something else to consider is whether the NHS would reimburse you for healthcare received in another country. I know that they do this in some cases (you'd have to find out what the guidelines are for this), but I fear they may only do this for healthcare received in other EU countries, and not in the US. Still, a lot of people who have been dissatisfied with the NHS have gone to France, received treatment there and got the NHS to pay for it. Obviously not ideal, but depending on how desperate you're feeling maybe worth considering.

But as I say, I know very little about all this, so someone who knows more about the system may say that it's all impossible... but, just a couple of ideas.


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## BeaBea

BigBellySSBBW said:


> I have a GP appointment next week with yet a 3rd GP. Lets see how this goes.



I am so relieved babe, and proud of you too!!! Well done!

I think KR7 has a good point, maybe go in on your own so you get the complete attention of the GP and he doesnt get mixed messages from the two of you. My own Father acts in exactly the same when when his family is ill - its just a coping mechanism but like your other half he would insist that we were 'fine' even if we had a severed limb.

SamanthaNYs idea of an advocate is great but I confess I dont know of any such scheme here. The people to ask would be the 'League of Friends' at the hospital you are attending. Its a voluntary organisation of (usually) retired ladies who help patients out, run the shop etc. They will be the folks who know whether the hospital has something similar.

Maybe try writing a list of what hurts, how severely and what the circumstances are too. Take it in with you as I believe that when faced with a comprehensive 'pain diary' it will be impossible for them to write you off as exaggerating the problem.

Regarding LoggaMatts comments - the reimbursement option only works with EU countries and not the US. But the travel insurance option, hmmm, not sure! You can usually read the complete terms and conditions of such a policy online before you buy it so you could check whether the (non) treatment and investigations you have had count as pre-existing or not.

Hang in there babe, keep us posted, and anytime you need support or a chat or even just a chance to vent we're all here for you! :wubu: 

Tracey xx


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## kr7

BeaBea said:


> .....a comprehensive 'pain diary' it will be impossible for them to write you off as exaggerating the problem.......



I like that idea, and I would also include dates of when all symptoms started/worsened/reappeared, dates of doctor's visits, dates and types of treatments and tests. I think that a comprehensive list like that would illustrate and help document that whatever has been done thus far is not working. It would help to organize your efforts, and would allow you to have a concise and complete list to present to the next doctor.

Chris


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## SamanthaNY

Any updates?


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## BeautifulPoeticDisaster

Third time is a charm!!! I'm so excited and relieved that someone is finally willing to listen.

So I went to the Dr today to get my ultrasounds results and my blood work results. 

The ultrasound result wasn't in yet.

The blood work looked good except that they didn't take my, and pardon my spelling, lol, haemoglobin blood count or something like that. So he wants to take my blood again tomorrow. (hurray for spell check, lol)

We also talked about my pain in my side. He said it could be superficial in the fat so to speak, but said we won't know that for sure until we run some tests.

SWEET! A doctor who isn't afraid to say the F word. He wasn't demeaning or condonscending, but he was honest, and I respect that.

We talked about the diarrhoea I have had for two months straight. He thinks a colonoscopy would be appropriate. Before he orders one though, I have a follow up appointment with him next week. I have asked him to be my doctor and he gladly accepted. 

YAY!!!! 

I'm really happy someone cares if I am healthy. Guess there are some good ones out there in the NHS but they are few and far between in my surgery.

I'm really relieved to not have to fight to be heard. He listened to all my ills, and I bitched about the other doctor and he validated me, something I needed from someone! And Mike didn't say much. Mike did ask about the gallbladder. The doctor said if it is anything to do with gallbladder it would show up in the blood work and ultrasound...so fingers crossed it won't be that.

So anyways, I found someone, a doctor, I trust with my life in the NHS I can calm down and stop being damsel in distress, I'm going to be ok 


Thanks everyone for supporting me and giving me ideas and not letting me give up. You guys rock!


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## SamanthaNY

Oh, what wonderful news! You must be so relieved... 

I'm happy for you! . And kudos for your determination in finding a good doc.


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## BeaBea

Hooray, thats fantastic news!!!! Well done babe! Now you have someone on your side I'm sure your recovery will go much smoother  

Tracey xxx


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## Waxwing

This is SUCH great news! It can be such a struggle to find a good doctor, but what an incredible relief when you do.


YAY!!!!!


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## Emma

Nik had a colonoscopy (thank god for copy and paste) for his IBS. Maybe you have that?


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## Dr. P Marshall

I'm glad. I read through this thread a few days ago, and honestly you've been on my mind off and on ever since. I'm so happy to hear that you are finally in good hands in terms of your medical care. I wish you a speedy diagnosis and solution and, of course, all the best.


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## HottiMegan

I am so happy to hear your update! I am glad you found a good doctor. They can be so hard to find that dont write everything off to the fat on your body. I hope you get some answers and some relief!


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## nixonshine

Just wondering how you were now? I have been lurking and following this thread and wondering about you...please give us an update. I hope all is well.


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## SocialbFly

um, update???


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## BeautifulPoeticDisaster

Hiya,

There isn't much to update. I'm dealing with the NHS here, lol, the Dr told me it could take over 3 months to have a colonoscipy done...so I am on the waiting list...woohooo, for Christmas that's what I get.



On another note, my PCOS was out of control for the past month and a half/ Having an ectopic and PCOS made for a messy last month. But the Dr put me on a couple of acid things and a super strong hormone and alas...I am blood free for the first time in a month and a half!!! woooot.


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## Aliena

BigBellySSBBW said:


> Hiya,
> 
> There isn't much to update. I'm dealing with the NHS here, lol, the Dr told me it could take over 3 months to have a colonoscipy done...so I am on the waiting list...woohooo, for Christmas that's what I get.
> 
> 
> 
> On another note, my PCOS was out of control for the past month and a half/ Having an ectopic and PCOS made for a messy last month. But the Dr put me on a couple of acid things and a super strong hormone and alas...I am blood free for the first time in a month and a half!!! woooot.





Oh gawwwwd, I can relate to the bleeding thing! (thank you PCOS  ) I found a great RE who diagnosed me with PCOS, (had all my life and only now being diagnosed officially) put me on Metformin and now I'm feeling so much better. I've not had bleeding problems in over 2 years. In fact, now I'm like clockwork. 

I've heard that progesterone is great for stopping unwanted bleeding. PCOS is some tough shit; you wont believe some of the symptoms for it. It's tough.

I'm glad you found a Dr. who is listening to you and is willing to help you find the causes of the symptoms you've been having. I hope you get to feeling better and soon; sending lots of positive healing vibes your way.


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## BeautifulPoeticDisaster

Aliena said:


> Oh gawwwwd, I can relate to the bleeding thing! (thank you PCOS  ) I found a great RE who diagnosed me with PCOS, (had all my life and only now being diagnosed officially) put me on Metformin and now I'm feeling so much better. I've not had bleeding problems in over 2 years. In fact, now I'm like clockwork.
> 
> I've heard that progesterone is great for stopping unwanted bleeding. PCOS is some tough shit; you wont believe some of the symptoms for it. It's tough.
> 
> I'm glad you found a Dr. who is listening to you and is willing to help you find the causes of the symptoms you've been having. I hope you get to feeling better and soon; sending lots of positive healing vibes your way.



Im on Met as well (isnt it annoying when people assume you are diabetic?) I was like clockwork everymonth until Feb when I had an ectopic pregnancy and then I didnt bleed until June 30...and I "stopped" yesterday with only a drop here and there today. Sorry if too graphic...but PCOS sucks ass.

Now that I am on the hormones I am eating like a cow. I hate it. Progesterone makes me want food and sex and nothing else...and this hormone...is stronger that progesterone....and it is making me bitchy, lol. I am not taking ANY shit from Mike...and normally I am a bit nicer to live with, lol.

Owell. He wasn't the one bleeding to death, lol.


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## merseylass

I've just read all the pages on this thread and it's certainly been a roller-coaster ride for you. I have a daughter with PCOS and I know the symptoms can be really awful...the good news is that it is treatable and it seems the dr. has got onto that problem for you. Very pleased.

Re the colonoscopy...in our local NHS hospital they are giving patients the option to have the test earlier when a cancellation occurs and they are now doing investigations evenings and weekends, in some cases. It is also possible to go on the waiting list at more than one hospital...is that an option you could suggest to your newest (3rd) gp?

I hope your pain doesn't cause you difficulty when you travel back to the states....and I hope you time there is lots of fun....assuming you are going to be able to get those reassuring hugs/cuddles from your mom?  

Just a word of caution re travel insurance. Be very, very upfront with the agent who gives you your travel insurance. It's been proven previously it is a living nightmare for travellers who don't report what they consider to be unimportant health details and then take sick overseas.....and denied hospital costs etc. I'd be certain to tell your insurers of the tests you are undergoing and it may not even affect your coverage. But at least they will have it declared by you and you can rest assured they would tell you in advance if you'd be denied reimbursement/coverage for pre-existing conditions (i.e. gallbladder etc.).

I bet you are counting down now til your trip across the pond. Have a great holiday.

Jacquie


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## BeautifulPoeticDisaster

Nothing much to update except I have an appointment with a gastroengolist? lol I have no clue how to spell it obviously. The last gp I saw mentioned diverticulitis which runs in my family...so who knows. My appointment is on Sept 25th...so we shall see.

As for my woman bits.....got better whilst taking the hormone but now that it is gone I am in loads of pain and bleeding to the point of barely being able to shift positions in bed without a downpour. This occurs mostly during the nights, but recently it has been more sporadic. The dr wanted to fit me with the coil but after reading scary things online, I decided to do some research about the pill...and I think I want a high dose progersterone pill....I have an appointment in a couple of weeks...but if I keep bleeding I will just see another GP.

Anyways, thats my life in a nutshell...will update when I know more!


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## Lastminute.Tom

aww mate! -sends positive vibes-


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## CuteyChubb

I just read this thread. I am so sorry you have been going through all this. Is there a possibility you could return home for good and get all the help you need? I'm with you on the drastic diet changes. I'm doing that myself now and it's not easy. Best wishes to you on recovering and feeling better.


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## SocialbFly

ok, i feel a little dorky posting this here, but one of the people i know has had bloating, nausea, abd pain, and they told him it was a zinc deficiency,and two days later after starting big zinc doses, he was fine...maybe ask the pharmacist??

supposedly, zinc helps do something with digestion and when it is depleted, nothing works right...

worth a try eh??


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## BeautifulPoeticDisaster

Ok, went to the Dr last week. Was fun, lol. They didn't shove their thingy into me yet.

Instead they tried an antibiotic and a med I take before I eat to stop spazms. 

The consultant said this type of tummy trouble is not uncommon for someone who has had a lot of stress or trauma. Even moving house is enough trauma to through someone off, but you add moving to a different country, into a semi stressful situation and then being put in the hospital cos I was losing a baby I didn't know was inside me in the first place....oh yeah and 2 weeks before I was in hospital...we did move house!

So....what she reckons is that the stress has triggered an automatic response in my bowls to release as soon as I eat..which is way to Freud(sp?) for me if I think about it, lol.

So she thinks it might be IBS-stress triggered and possible a wheat allergy...so they did a blood test on me to see if that could be why I was puffing up. I suspect they will find it to be positive as I have weird reactions to carbs anyhow.

Well...that's where it is at right now....taking a long ass time...but stil kicking none the less!


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## BLUEeyedBanshee

BigBellySSBBW said:


> So she thinks it might be IBS-stress triggered and possible a wheat allergy...so they did a blood test on me to see if that could be why I was puffing up. I suspect they will find it to be positive as I have weird reactions to carbs anyhow.
> 
> Well...that's where it is at right now....taking a long ass time...but stil kicking none the less!



Wow...if your blood test comes back positive for a wheat allergy or for celiac (which they're probably testing you for as well) and you need some help figuring out what's safe and what's not, I've been wheat/gluten free for just over a year now. Send me a message or whatever...I'm always happy to help when I can. It's not fun, but if that's part of the problem, elimination of it will make a world of difference.


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## LillyBBBW

When I was in Europe I ate something and got very sick. My stomach was all messed up and remained that way long after I returned to the states. I finally could stand no more and went to the doctor because everything I ate sent my stomach into a tail spin. He told me that it was probably from un pasteurized food. Here in the states pasteurization is mandatory where as in other countries it is not so I probably got sick off of the Port Salut I bought at a supermarket in Brussels. Soon after I saw the doc my symptoms cleared up on their own. I've always had water retention problems but I noticed it got really bad in Europe while I was there. I can take Lasix though so usually I pop one when things get really bad. In Europe however I had to use Lasix way more than usual which set off alarms in my brain but since returning to the states the issue has gone away almost completley. 

This is all conjecture and speculation but I thought it bore mentioning. Could it be that your body is processing organisms that are unfamiliar and that with time things will eventually right themselves? Just another idea to put in the collection jar.





BigBellySSBBW said:


> Ok, went to the Dr last week. Was fun, lol. They didn't shove their thingy into me yet.
> 
> Instead they tried an antibiotic and a med I take before I eat to stop spazms.
> 
> The consultant said this type of tummy trouble is not uncommon for someone who has had a lot of stress or trauma. Even moving house is enough trauma to through someone off, but you add moving to a different country, into a semi stressful situation and then being put in the hospital cos I was losing a baby I didn't know was inside me in the first place....oh yeah and 2 weeks before I was in hospital...we did move house!
> 
> So....what she reckons is that the stress has triggered an automatic response in my bowls to release as soon as I eat..which is way to Freud(sp?) for me if I think about it, lol.
> 
> So she thinks it might be IBS-stress triggered and possible a wheat allergy...so they did a blood test on me to see if that could be why I was puffing up. I suspect they will find it to be positive as I have weird reactions to carbs anyhow.
> 
> Well...that's where it is at right now....taking a long ass time...but stil kicking none the less!


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