# The utter and absolute beauty of pearshaped women. Food for thought and butt.



## stan_der_man (Sep 27, 2007)

Ok this thread may tank as many of my threads do, but I'm curious to see if anybody else has thought about this...


On that positive note...


Dont' get me wrong... pear shaped girls are very beautiful, no doubt about it. But so are women of all other shapes. There are always threads about how to gain weight in the gluteal region of the body. I'm not criticizing these sort of threads, I think they are honest questions (or wank fodder... one of the two) and fun to discuss, but seldom do you see people go ape shit about weight growing in other areas (OK... belly, thighs and boobs at times....). There clearly isn't the degree of fascination about gaining weight in other places as there is about growing fat below the belt. Is it because men generally can't grow it there? Is it because "pushin' cushin" is something is just naturally desirable? Dunno... don't care.

I have this theory that women are beautiful in so many different ways it's hard to truly quantify their beauty. This isn't politically correct bullshit that I'm saying to give people warm fuzzies (as I often do...), I truly believe it. Different shapes have their advantages and disadvantages. Different shapes are beautiful in their own way.

I find that apple shaped girls often tend to have better skin, softer rounder shoulders and nice soft neck fat. Girls that are the uber "perfect pears" tend to be short... and sometimes have lower back problems, not a criticism, just a simple observation so show that there isn't any such thing as absolute perfection, absolute beauty.

Whatduya think? Tell me about all different kinds of beauty.


fa_man_stan


----------



## wrestlingguy (Sep 27, 2007)

Well said, Stan. I'm obviously married to a pear, but I've always marveled at how fat women can take so many beautiful shapes while the "chopstick" women all eand to look the same unless they get some type of cosmetic modification, typically to make something on their body larger.

And I agree that your comments are from the heart, and not intended to get a rise from the ladies telling you what a great guy you are. Still going strong after over 1800 posts, I think the ladies here know you are sincere.


----------



## ashmamma84 (Sep 27, 2007)

Hmmm...I don't know; according to Babe I carry my weight on the bottom, and I have relatively great skin, and I do have back problems (maybe it's all the junk in my trunk  ) I personally think I'm a hybrid of sorts...my stomach protrudes, as well as my arse, and I've got big legs too. But I make do with what I have, and I'm loving it.

Friends of mine that are apple shaped have great legs and arms and are very tone, and the hourglasses tend to have what alot of women seek, regardless of size, I find...and pear shapes tend to be softer.

Now of course all of this is just very generic and general terms, and maybe that's why the human body is so darn fascinating -- because it isn't black and white and no matter how we try to categorize and put people into a proverbial box...somewhere, someone doesn't fit the mold. 

But it is fun to look at though.


----------



## Tad (Sep 27, 2007)

fa_man_stan said:


> Whatduya think? Tell me about all different kinds of beauty.



Many years ago my mother read a book of the (translated) letters written a noblewoman of Louis the 15th court, back to her family in Austria. She was married to some high french noble, but I forget all of those particulars.

Anyway, my mother was amused enough by one letter to read parts of it aloud. In it the noblewoman complained that the style at Versailles was for full busts and round plump shoulders, while she was wide of hip but no matter how much weight she gained her bust remained small and her shoulders small and angular.

So, different times, places, and cultures, different things in demand.

On another note, a few groups have tried to do cross cultural measurements of beauty--what do people in all cultures seem to agree is beautiful. In all, a waist hip ratio of around 0.7 or so seems to be admired. For a woman with 36" hips this would be a waist of about 25"--more of a hip waist difference than average. For a BBW with 50 inch hips this would be a waist of 35", which is definitely pear-shape territory. For an SSBBW with 70" hips this would be a waist of 49"--a waist -hip difference of over 20"! So I think that the fatter a woman is, the more likely that she'll have that 'golden ratio' only if pear shaped. Now, how true that ratio really is, I don't know, and that certainly was not the only aspect of beauty admired across cultures.

Finally, I think in our culture big butts area almost more verboten than bellies, maybe simply because thin women often show weight gain in their backside first. So maybe that makes being fat and pear shaped event that much more of a taboo breaker?

Regards;

-Ed


----------



## RevolOggerp (Sep 27, 2007)

Could you clarify the difference between pear-shaped and apple-shaped?


----------



## Santaclear (Sep 27, 2007)

RevolOggerp said:


> Could you clarify the difference between pear-shaped and apple-shaped?



Pear-shapers carry more of their weight in their legs and bottom, bigger butt. 

Apple shapes - bigger belly, more of their weight in the top part of their body, smaller legs and butt.


----------



## stan_der_man (Sep 27, 2007)

wrestlingguy said:


> ...
> And I agree that your comments are from the heart, and not intended to get a rise from the ladies telling you what a great guy you are. Still going strong after over 1800 posts, I think the ladies here know you are sincere.


Thank you sir for the complement! I think it's good to stir some ideas around here for the noobies... pass the mirror around a bit and reflect on things that we think and say about fat acceptance, our preferences, things like that.



ashmamma84 said:


> Hmmm...I don't know; according to Babe I carry my weight on the bottom, and I have relatively great skin, and I do have back problems (maybe it's all the junk in my trunk  ) I personally think I'm a hybrid of sorts...my stomach protrudes, as well as my arse, and I've got big legs too. But I make do with what I have, and I'm loving it.


I definitely was just throwing some generalizations out there, you are certainly right Ashmamma, each person is different.



ashmamma84 said:


> Now of course all of this is just very generic and general terms, and maybe that's why the human body is so darn fascinating -- because it isn't black and white and no matter how we try to categorize and put people into a proverbial box...somewhere, someone doesn't fit the mold.
> 
> But it is fun to look at though.


That's one of the things I think makes big women so beautiful and interesting, there are so many different shapes, each beautiful in their own way. The shapes get somewhat exaggerated with a larger woman, that's something you don't see as much in thinner women.




edx said:


> ...
> So, different times, places, and cultures, different things in demand.
> ...
> Finally, I think in our culture big butts area almost more verboten than bellies, maybe simply because thin women often show weight gain in their backside first. So maybe that makes being fat and pear shaped event that much more of a taboo breaker?
> ...


I also find it interesting how being fat in certain places seems to have certain social implications. Carrying ones fat lower on the body is generally considered feminine, where girth in the middle usually is thought of as being masculine.

There have been plenty of threads in Dimensions where I've read that the apple shaped women get tired of hearing how wonderful pear shapes are, but I've noticed as American television is starting to show more fat women in positive ways, it seems to be mostly apple shaped (or buxom) women who are the ones being portrayed. I can't think of any actress off hand that is predominately small breast, pear shaped or bottom heavy? I think the taboos of being fat are starting to decrease, but they are still around in subtle and not easily explainable ways.


----------



## The Orange Mage (Sep 27, 2007)

fa_man_stan said:


> There have been plenty of threads in Dimensions where I've read that the apple shaped women get tired of hearing how wonderful pear shapes are, but I've noticed as American television is starting to show more fat women in positive ways, it seems to be mostly apple shaped (or buxom) women who are the ones being portrayed. I can't think of any actress off hand that is predominately small breast, pear shaped or bottom heavy? I think the taboos of being fat are starting to decrease, but they are still around in subtle and not easily explainable ways.



I think Hollywood is heeding the call of "TITS OR GTFO" in this regard. You know, since the only thing men like to be big on a woman is tits.

I bet if someone suggested putting a classically pear-shaped woman with beautiful hips, a juicy behind, and a tiny frame from the waist up, the people in charge of TV-land would be like, "What for? To appease teh black mans? "*


* (For clarification, this is just a mini-rant from my own experience...that being that people outside this community assume that when I, a young white male, say "I like bigger women," they immediately assume I'm a breast fanatic. However, I am damn sure if I were black and I said "I like bigger women," they would immediately know that I loves me some junk in the trunk. This is a rant more aimed at the general public's biases in frustration than anything.)

Sorry if the above was veering off-topic, but it's just annoying to be pegged as a breast man because of my appearance.


----------



## Shosh (Sep 27, 2007)

Hi Stan, Sometimes I wish I could be invisable so that my body was not being sized up to see if it is the desirable shape etc. You are being very sensitive here I will say,but men can go through their day to day life without having constant critiques of their bodies like women have to have.
I struggle with my body image as many here would know.
I think it would be nice to be thought of as women primarily and not have our body shape labelled. If I see a thin guy is he a strand of spaghetti? Is a fat guy a blob of Jello etc? 

I don't know Stan. Holla back at me with yer thoughts.

Susannah


----------



## Tad (Sep 27, 2007)

Susannah said:


> Hi Stan, Sometimes I wish I could be invisable so that my body was not being sized up to see if it is the desirable shape etc. You are being very sensitive here I will say,but men can go through their day to day life without having constant critiques of their bodies like women have to have.
> I struggle with my body image as many here would know.
> I think it would be nice to be thought of as women primarily and not have our body shape labelled. If I see a thin guy is he a strand of spaghetti? Is a fat guy a blob of Jello etc?
> 
> ...



Not Stan, but....

I agree, men don't get judged on the beauty of their body. But there is a constant, background, 'how much of a man are you' sort of judgment or categorizing going on. From men and from women, although with women it tends to be less overt. Height, muscles, how much hair you have, manly activities, and so on. The seem late teen punks that will yell at a passing BBW "Two words: Jenny Craig!" (as happened one time to my wife) are the ones who will block off the entire sidewalk, and look at most guys in contempt as they walk around them (but they'll move for anyone who looks appropriately tough or important). 

This is where some BHM pay a price--if they are judged insufficiently manly. Be it because they are short and fat, or carry their weight such that they appear more soft and jiggly than BIG, or they breath hard while moving around, or they don't do the right macho activities.

Just as the BBW sitting in the lunch room hearing her co-workers talk about their diets knows that she's being subtly cut out and put down, the BHM who is sitting in the lunch room listening to co-workers compare notes about their mountain biking experiences on the weekend and plan their squash game knows he's being cut out and put down.

So no, guys don't get judged on the same things to the same degree, but they do get judged continually all the same.

Just as an example....I grabbed a book from the fantasy rack of library the other week, thinking it was a generic fantasy novel, featuring a woman from our world getting transported into a fantasy world. In the beginning the heroine describes herself as ten or twenty pounds above thin, but she likes her curves. Awesome, I thought--nice to see that. Then she meets a guy who is clearly not-the-love-interest, who is short, has thinning hair, and has a nervous manner. She immediately goes on about how annoying it is that short guys always seem so smitten by her, and spends the next chapter trying to avoid him, and the older guy, skinny guy, that she finds creepy. It was only when she met the hunky and well-muscled barbarian who clearly was the love interest that I went and looked at the back of the book more carefully, and realized that this was from some new line of books attempting a genre cross-over of fantasy and romance novels, and I tossed it in a basket to take back to the library. But I thought it was interesting how it gave some acceptance to the woman being 'non-perfect' but that it was OK to all but mock the guys who were not manly enough.

Regards;

-Ed


----------



## mossystate (Sep 27, 2007)

fa_man_stan said:


> There have been plenty of threads in Dimensions where I've read that the apple shaped women get tired of hearing how wonderful pear shapes are, but I've noticed as American television is starting to show more fat women in positive ways, it seems to be mostly apple shaped (or buxom) women who are the ones being portrayed. I can't think of any actress off hand that is predominately small breast, pear shaped or bottom heavy? I think the taboos of being fat are starting to decrease, but they are still around in subtle and not easily explainable ways.




I think that , yes, there are more buxom women, but these women tend to not have any belly. I see many more women who are larger breasted with larger butts...hourglass...the a larger ' ideal '...or women who have those emergency supplies in the trunk. Bellies will always be the biggest shocker. Other than pregnancy, when the belly is of course very ' feminine ', bellies are viewed as sloppy.


----------



## tonynyc (Sep 27, 2007)

*Stan:

Interesting thread-there is definite beauty in the various BBW Body Types. It all depends as to what each of our preferences are.

I think for women the merits of Pear,Apple,Hourglass, Round bodytypes can be discussed for days. 

Susannah:

Sometimes it would be nice to not to be "sized up"-but, it happens unfortunately. I think men are also judged be it: ectomorphic - endomorphic or mesmomorpic body type. BBWs may have a variety of responses into what they find appealing. 

From my own personal experience- there are some BBWs that do not like Big Husky Guys- I just find myself grateful and fortunate to run into those that do...*


----------



## Tina (Sep 27, 2007)

A pear here -- 45" waist and a 66" hips (if I'm remembering correctly). Used to be more of an hourglass, but now I'm definitely a pear. I guess at 5'6" I'm average height for a woman, and as far as skin, I'm not sure how to gauge. It's very, very soft (which runs in the family), though I do have stretch marks. Back problems? Oh, yeah. I have sciatica and have trouble sleeping on a flat bed, as my butt protrudes so much it throws my spine off and so I have to sleep on an adjustable bed, which is a PITA. But it's my bod, and it has birthed a baby, given and received pleasure, and it's what gets me from here to there.

I think there is something beautiful about all shapes, and as for the whole thing about women's bodies being dissected, yeah, it's common. Sometimes it can be irritating, though this thread isn't, to me, anyway. As for men's bodies? Yes, us women notice, to varying degrees, and there are definitely some things about a man's bod that does it for me more than others.


----------



## dan (Sep 27, 2007)

I do believe this. The biological reason why women wear fat all around their bottoms is genetically for stored energy for gestation. So I do believe a circuit in alot of men's minds subconsciously is attracted to "pears" just for the reason of procreation, survival of the fittest mate . It is only biological attraction.


----------



## elle camino (Sep 28, 2007)

yeah it would appear that being a pear is the 'correct' way for a woman to be fat. anything else and you're (to shamelessly gank a phrase from rebecca) a second class fatty.


----------



## mossystate (Sep 28, 2007)

Now I know why I was never pregnant...no man wanted to knock up a chick with a big belly and no ass to speak of...


----------



## stan_der_man (Sep 28, 2007)

Susannah said:


> Hi Stan, Sometimes I wish I could be invisable so that my body was not being sized up to see if it is the desirable shape etc. You are being very sensitive here I will say,but men can go through their day to day life without having constant critiques of their bodies like women have to have.
> I struggle with my body image as many here would know.
> I think it would be nice to be thought of as women primarily and not have our body shape labelled. If I see a thin guy is he a strand of spaghetti? Is a fat guy a blob of Jello etc?
> 
> ...


As others said, there is and probably will always be a certain amount of labeling of body sizes and shapes by both of the sexes upon each other. Each person has a personal preference, it's just human nature to a certain extent. As long as it doesn't lead to outright body stereotyping I don't think it's that much to worry about. Part of it I think is that fat is still somewhat of a taboo in general, and for people outside of Dims (and within) this is still an ackward subject. As the taboos break down people will more openly talk about these things, hopefully leading to a better understanding of all this.

Taking from what Ed and Tonynyc wrote, men are often on the receiving end of labeling by women also. Having been thin, I felt that I was always being labeled as wimpy. I've seen studies (and there was a thread about this...) that women are much less likely to date shorter men. As Tina said, women have their preferences in men also, that's a personal decision and human nature. Each woman has different preferences as do men. I know it's easy to say, but taking this personally when it's directed at you is just going to unnecessarily lower your self esteem. We are attractive in our own way, not only should we recognize that in other people, we need to recognize that in ourselves.



The Orange Mage said:


> I think Hollywood is heeding the call of "TITS OR GTFO" in this regard. You know, since the only thing men like to be big on a woman is tits.
> 
> I bet if someone suggested putting a classically pear-shaped woman with beautiful hips, a juicy behind, and a tiny frame from the waist up, the people in charge of TV-land would be like, "What for? To appease teh black mans? "*
> 
> ...



Very good points Orange Mage, the body shape labels even lead to the point that it's assumed that certain types of men prefer certain female body shapes. Just as a side note to this, when I was looking to get a tattoo, many tattoos of female figures I could find that were even close to being fat (somewhat pear shaped) were Latina women. They were beautiful drawings. There are still the assumptions of ethnicity (or cultural preferences that historically exist.) Hopefully these assumptions will become less prominent in the future as fat becomes more socially accepted.

As you said Mossystate, the women with the "classic shapes", buxom, hourglass, the larger "ideal" shapes are the ones considered beautiful. As with the example of tattoos, those "ideals" are the ones being drawn. It's sort of a viscious cycle, I think these "ideals" are drawn (stock imagery) more because that is what the people selling (and drawing) these designs think people want, there aren't other choices of shapes to select from. I wanted a larger belly on my tattoo, I really had to emphasize that was something I considered desireable.


----------



## RedVelvet (Sep 28, 2007)

fa_man_stan said:


> I have this theory that women are beautiful in so many different ways it's hard to truly quantify their beauty. This isn't politically correct bullshit that I'm saying to give people warm fuzzies (as I often do...), I truly believe it. Different shapes have their advantages and disadvantages. Different shapes are beautiful in their own way.
> 
> I find that apple shaped girls often tend to have better skin, softer rounder shoulders and nice soft neck fat. Girls that are the uber "perfect pears" tend to be short... and sometimes have lower back problems, not a criticism, just a simple observation so show that there isn't any such thing as absolute perfection, absolute beauty.
> 
> ...





Love you. Mean it.


----------



## Shosh (Sep 28, 2007)

tonynyc said:


> *Stan:
> 
> Interesting thread-there is definite beauty in the various BBW Body Types. It all depends as to what each of our preferences are.
> 
> ...



Very interesting to hear this Tony. I didn't realize that men were quite as under the microscope re their looks as much as women are.
Meanwhile what is not to like about you? What a sweet guy you are Tony. 
Susannah


----------



## Shosh (Sep 28, 2007)

Stanley, You are quite right when you say that we all have our preferences regarding what we find beautiful. I didn't realize that men were quite as judged on their body type etc, but upon reflection I suppose they are. Maybe not to the same intense degree though. 

Meanwhile whimps are sweet. Whimps work. 

I think I am a papple meanwhile. 

Shosh


----------



## tonynyc (Sep 28, 2007)

Susannah said:


> Very interesting to hear this Tony. I didn't realize that men were quite as under the microscope re their looks as much as women are.
> Meanwhile what is not to like about you? What a sweet guy you are Tony.
> Susannah



*
Susannah:
Thanks you are sweetie. Men do get judged;but, it's not as extreme as it is for BBWs especially when you consider the ratio of BBWs to Men on this board or in social events. 

Men for the most part- tend to be judged by how successful they are. I mean look at some of the most powerful financial tycoons - some are not GQ models and are not starving for companionship -but that is a whole other issue. 

However, when men are judged by physical types at least in the BBW arena; you do have a wide variety as to what the preferences are be it thin vs. heavy vs. muscular types of builds.

I would have to say this in most Size Acceptance dance or functions that I have attended - though I will see plenty of SSBBWs in the audience - the numbers are not the same for aSSBHM [ a guy over 350lbs].
*


----------



## Tad (Sep 28, 2007)

tonynyc said:


> *
> I would have to say this in most Size Acceptance dance or functions that I have attended - though I will see plenty of SSBBWs in the audience - the numbers are not the same for aSSBHM [ a guy over 350lbs].
> *



That may be because there are less SSBHM than SSBBW. If you go googling for charts of BMI or weight percentiles, you'll see that the upper end up women are fatter than the upper end of men. That is, if you look at the charts linked from this page, http://www.halls.md/chart/height-weight.htm


you'll see that the 95th percentile (meaning the BMI where 95% of the population is at the same or lower BMI) for men about 40 is a BMI around 37 or 38, while for women the same age it is 42 or 43. If you go digging more, by the 98th percentile the difference is even bigger. It would appear that it is just easier for women to get very fat, so it happens with more of them, or something like that.

In short, it would appear that there are more very fat women than there are very fat men. So right there, you would expect more to show up at such events.

If you throw in that men probably get judged on a broader basket of things than women, when it comes to attractiveness as a mate, that probably takes more of the SSBHM out of the equation.

Then you throw in that if there is anything like a comparable portion of FA in the two genders (I have no clue if there is or is not, and I suspect the nature of FA varies between gender too, on average, but still go with the assumption for a moment) then the ratio of SS folk to admirers will be higher with SSBBW, which would be more likely to mean a higher portion of the women have not formed partnerships.

All of which would tend to emphisize the number of SSBBW vs SSBHM coming to such events, I think.

-Ed


----------



## stan_der_man (Sep 28, 2007)

elle camino said:


> yeah it would appear that being a pear is the 'correct' way for a woman to be fat. anything else and you're (to shamelessly gank a phrase from rebecca) a second class fatty.


That is the thing that has alway puzzled me, are men instinctively attracted to pear shapes, to "birthin' hips"? I know that my first experiences of noticing fat women when I was young were usually women with large rear ends. Maybe it's just because they are a smaller percentage of the population and stand out more, I don't know that off hand.

Or maybe as you said Ed:


> ...
> So, different times, places, and cultures, different things in demand.
> ...


Maybe we are just in a time period where pear shapes are the "style"?

Just taking body features here... as I got older I started noticing different parts of women that I found attractive and I began to appreciate how they were beautiful in their own ways. That's how my appreciations as a FA developed, basically because of my own thinking, I had no other males to bond with, the contemplation of this was all on my own, without the influence of others.

The jist of what I'm getting at here and wondering, not trying to belittle newbees or "bootie lovers"... (The "butt food" thread is what got me thinking about this...) I find it interesting how the new F.A.s who discover Dimensions commonly seem to gravitate towards fascination with pear shapes. Nothing wrong with that, like I said earlier, pears, apples, bellies are all beautiful in their own ways. Like myself (although less so now-a-days), I wonder if these male F.A.s haven't had the experience of talking about their appreciation of fat women with other males, or may not have been in a position to further contemplate their appreciation of fat women, and what it is exactly that they find attractive. Taking a leap into pseudo-science here... I wonder, like myself when I was young, do males have some sort of primal attraction to pear shaped women? And, in the absence of a society that accepts fat as being "normal", attractive, or whatever; Are F.A.s (heterosexual males in particular) not in a position where their preferences can flourish and develop to include a range of appreciations for other shapes? Do they not have the peer support to create an environment where their appreciations can further develop?

I know, these are big assumptions and just casual observation on my part. From other threads I've participated in and started, I've wondered these things aloud before, in different ways. If one newbee reads this, actually learns something and moves on to become a respecting and thoughtful F.A. then this thread will have been successful.




RedVelvet said:


> Love you. Mean it.


You are too kind Arvee... :blush:


----------



## elle camino (Sep 28, 2007)

i dunno, stan. 

what i can say is that i'm pretty sure i speak for more women than just myself when i say it's kind of hard to stomach (heh. no pun intended) all the comments about how men have some kind of primal attraction to pear shapes, due to the 'fact' that the hips and butt are the places where women 'naturally' store their fat, so that particular shape is somehow more indicative of health and fertility, blah blah etc etc etc. 
which is kind of like telling all of us nonpears that it's unnatural, undesirable, and unhealthy for us to carry our weight elsewhere - like we at some point in the past were given some kind of choice as to where our weight will settle on our bodies, and we chose incorrectly. oops! i checked the 'belly' option when i _meant_ to check the 'rad huge ass' one! crapdamn! now that hot caveman on my block will have no way of knowing i am perfectly fertile and willing to birth and raise him a small army of spawn to hunt mammoths with! I REALLY DID MEAN TO CHECK THE ASS BOX!!

y'know?

it's just lame to hear. we _don't_ get to control where we put on weight (as much as the 'butt gain food' thread wishes we did). if i eat a whole pan of brownies, it's not going to my hips or my butt. it's going to my belly. i can't tell it otherwise. it's annoying to hear that that's 'unnatural'.
and while i fully understand that preferences for things which are dictated by genetics (like preferring tall people, or blonde people, or people with green eyes) are something almost all of us have, there's a difference between saying "man i dunno, i just find myself much more attracted to tall guys, personally", and saying "i am attracted to tall men because men are supposed to be tall! thirty thousand years ago being tall meant you could stand up higher on the savanna, and see more incoming sabretooths! what use to me is a man who can't keep those sabretooths off my property, seriously? it's unnatural for you to be so short, short guy. and that is why i find you unattractive."


----------



## Suze (Sep 28, 2007)

i think i'm repeating myself but...

whats the difference between a pear and an hourglass? i still doesen't get it. are there just *small* hourglasses like marilyn m?


----------



## Caine (Sep 28, 2007)

You know, it jsut comes down to PERSONEL preference! Nothing more, I like like the all over look and pears alot but thats jsut me, there is no right BBW or SSBBW, jsut a matter of what kind of shape you like!


----------



## elle camino (Sep 28, 2007)

susieQ said:


> i think i'm repeating myself but...
> 
> whats the difference between a pear and an hourglass?


ok. 
picture an hourglass.

now picture a pear.

...different shapes. 

an hourglass shape (on a person) is just that. large hips and/or butt, small waist, large bewbies. 
a pear shape is (wait for it) shaped like a pear, instead. large hips and/or butt, smaller waist, and not a proportionally large chest.


----------



## SoVerySoft (Sep 28, 2007)

susieQ said:


> i think i'm repeating myself but...
> 
> whats the difference between a pear and an hourglass? i still doesen't get it. are there just *small* hourglasses like marilyn m?



Pears have smaller busts, bigger butts. Relatively small waists. They are shaped like a pear.

Hourglass has smaller waist and large bust and big belly and/or big butt. They are shaped like an hourglass.

The small waist is what's missing in an apple. They are round in the middle  Um, yeah, shaped like an apple!


----------



## chickadee (Sep 28, 2007)

A lot of women don't fit in the "pear" or "apple" category. Go to the mall or the supermarket and check out the ladies. 

For instance, you could have a big bust, small waist, and narrow hips. Then you're a "triangle," I suppose.


----------



## Weejee (Sep 28, 2007)

A triangle seems to be the only sort of figures they design clothes for. I've been a pear all my life, ever since puberty destroyed my perfect figure. As a child I had No hips! IT WAS dream time! I looked good in anything.

Then at ten, I got the curse (aka, reached menarche) and got big hips. Not a big bust. And, as I've written before, at almost near-underweight I was still a blasted pear, looked good in nothing, because God forbid a woman (or man) should have hips.

Everyone's gotta be a triangle or design their own clothes.


It really PISSES Me off 

Weej (54 and counting, and still have not reached Cronehood!)


----------



## stan_der_man (Sep 29, 2007)

elle camino said:


> i dunno, stan.
> 
> what i can say is that i'm pretty sure i speak for more women than just myself when i say it's kind of hard to stomach (heh. no pun intended) all the comments about how men have some kind of primal attraction to pear shapes, due to the 'fact' that the hips and butt are the places where women 'naturally' store their fat, so that particular shape is somehow more indicative of health and fertility, blah blah etc etc etc.
> 
> ...



You are right Elle. Obviously natural selection hasn't weeded out short men by having sabretooth tigers eat them, or apple shaped women because their hips weren't "birthin'" enough, so the idea of "instinctive preferences" is weak at best. Also, saying that pears (or any other shape) are more "natural" than other shapes is obviously not true because all shapes are naturally occuring, and since fat distribution varies there really aren't "true" shapes anyway.

One way or another, I think preferences are aquired over time and as one matures those preferences change as a person sees different combinations of traits and finds interest in these new combinations.


----------



## liz (di-va) (Sep 29, 2007)

I am in the mood to throw in a variable here: aging. Bodies change shape, change silhouette, one is forced to make peace with a new body all over again.

I am like Tina; used to be an hourglass, recently I've become much more peary, although sometimes I just think...big all over (wider, not assier, much bigger tum). Which changes how everything feels. And it's not all immediately exhilarating or something, because coming along with new bottom-heaviness is a lack of mobility (yah just don't move the same way) and the inability to fit in seats...becoming more peary is when I really stopped fitting into the world around me. That hasn't been all happy. It can make me feel really sexy sometimes, but other times it's a hassle, I'd never say otherwise. My clothes stopped fitting, I can't fake my way into movie seats anymore...

I would also note that broadscale cultural acceptance in the white-folk-dominated society of any junk in the trunk is a fairly recent phenom! Until recently the beauty ideal included no actual ass/thighs, in fact. For what it's worth. As a suburban white girl, I got *no* pop for my ass until I found the FA world, that's for sure (totally the opposite). Back in the day it was a mortification, a shaming...

- - - - - - - - - - - - 

What I really think: I find it crucial to see lots of different shapes of fat celebrated here. Shapes and ages. Here, anywhere. If 'fat 'only means an inflated Jessica Rabbit 25-y-o, then what we're supporting isn't fundamentally any different than the rest of the world, which tells, well, the rest of the world that they don't look right. All fruits are created equal .


----------



## Suze (Sep 29, 2007)

elle camino said:


> ok.
> picture an hourglass.
> 
> now picture a pear.
> ...



yeah, i know it's kinda obvious, but i've heard that i'm both, so it's a bit confusing.
Thanks!


----------



## Green Eyed Fairy (Sep 29, 2007)

mossystate said:


> I think that , yes, there are more buxom women, but these women tend to not have any belly. I see many more women who are larger breasted with larger butts...hourglass...the a larger ' ideal '...or women who have those emergency supplies in the trunk. Bellies will always be the biggest shocker. Other than pregnancy, when the belly is of course very ' feminine ', bellies are viewed as sloppy.




I second this....


----------



## Green Eyed Fairy (Sep 29, 2007)

RedVelvet said:


> Love you. Mean it.



I second this, too


----------



## Suze (Sep 29, 2007)

SoVerySoft said:


> Pears have smaller busts, bigger butts. Relatively small waists. They are shaped like a pear.
> 
> Hourglass has smaller waist and large bust and big belly and/or big butt. They are shaped like an hourglass.
> 
> The small waist is what's missing in an apple. They are round in the middle  Um, yeah, shaped like an apple!



Thanks for the explanation  
Well, I know that I’m definitely not an apple. I have come to the conclusion that I’m probably an hourglass or a pear with a large bust.


----------



## Green Eyed Fairy (Sep 29, 2007)

elle camino said:


> yeah it would appear that being a pear is the 'correct' way for a woman to be fat. anything else and you're (to shamelessly gank a phrase from rebecca) a second class fatty.




I have felt this way, too, oftentimes...... from things I have seen posted here.


----------



## Green Eyed Fairy (Sep 29, 2007)

elle camino said:


> i dunno, stan.
> 
> what i can say is that i'm pretty sure i speak for more women than just myself when i say it's kind of hard to stomach (heh. no pun intended) all the comments about how men have some kind of primal attraction to pear shapes, due to the 'fact' that the hips and butt are the places where women 'naturally' store their fat, so that particular shape is somehow more indicative of health and fertility, blah blah etc etc etc.
> which is kind of like telling all of us nonpears that it's unnatural, undesirable, and unhealthy for us to carry our weight elsewhere - like we at some point in the past were given some kind of choice as to where our weight will settle on our bodies, and we chose incorrectly. oops! i checked the 'belly' option when i _meant_ to check the 'rad huge ass' one! crapdamn! now that hot caveman on my block will have no way of knowing i am perfectly fertile and willing to birth and raise him a small army of spawn to hunt mammoths with! I REALLY DID MEAN TO CHECK THE ASS BOX!!
> ...



I tend to feel a "double bash" when I hear out in "the rest of the world" that being fat is bad so I come here where "fat if good" then see that it's not so great unless you have a "special shape" about you....jfx :doh:

and speaking of "biological" reasons, why are there still women being born with the tendency to be apple shaped?????????? Why didn't "nature edit us out" if this is all about "survival of the fittest"?

Thank goodness for those "belly guys" 


**It wouldn't let me rep you again right now Stan.....


----------



## Tina (Sep 29, 2007)

You know what, though? I remember a thread on the WB here within the last year or so where people were polled on what shape they found most pleasing and apple was tops. There are many more belly men here than one would imagine, so chin up. I understand not wanting to be reduced to just a parts is parts kinda thing, but in the end, there are many different preferences with the preference for larger bodies, and we are all beautiful to many 'someones'. Please don't let it feel personal. :kiss2:


----------



## mossystate (Sep 29, 2007)

Tina, just speaking for moi, I might feel some of this in a personal way, but, if I were shaped any other way, I would still feel like saying...shut the fuck up with the droning on and on about ideals...*L* When I was 140 pounds, I hated the obsession with ' types ' and I hated the hatred of fat, female bodies. I do still think that outside of Dims, men who like ' thick ', like pears or hourglass are the norm..but..yeah...there are a few belly lovers roaming around these parts..well, not MY parts... Oh, and I am a bit disillusioned over the lack of suitable men out here for me...I mean, I placed my order..sheesh!...*L*


----------



## Tina (Sep 29, 2007)

Tell me about it, Mossy. I had to import one from Canada! I know that recently in another thread I wrote about how surreal it was to be featured in the Dims print mag and have men all over my email box, and virtual mail box, as well as some very nice things said on the board, but IRL...?


----------



## The Orange Mage (Sep 29, 2007)

Seriously, where HAVE the belly guys been lately?

They can't ALL be out of town or something, can they?


----------



## Green Eyed Fairy (Sep 29, 2007)

lol @ tumbleweed 

This is what I usually manage to find out in reality....






and to the occasional married guy here that sends me a private message, gets me interested, sends me things in the mail and then I find out he has lied to me about being married...(this has happened to me three times here so far, btw) I think the same about you :batting:


----------



## mossystate (Sep 29, 2007)

DAMN YOU, Green..I want things in the mail..I don't even care if they are from married men..I need to feel wanted and purty for a day.....


----------



## mossystate (Sep 29, 2007)

Tina said:


> Tell me about it, Mossy. I had to import one from Canada! I know that recently in another thread I wrote about how surreal it was to be featured in the Dims print mag and have men all over my email box, and virtual mail box, as well as some very nice things said on the board, but IRL...?



You and TraciJo have the nicest weeds!

I do hear about the success stories, here on Dims...but...Mr. Wizard, I don't think you have anything for me in your bag. Losing a bunch of weight would just have me all sad and in a bad mood...oh...what's a woman to do.

Speaking of food..I need some..


----------



## Green Eyed Fairy (Sep 29, 2007)

mossystate said:


> DAMN YOU, Green..I want things in the mail..I don't even care if they are from married men..I need to feel wanted and purty for a day.....



PM me your address  :batting:


----------



## Tina (Sep 30, 2007)

This is my favorite weed, of the tumbling variety. I saw it and felt they were in dire need of bowlers, so I gave obliged them. Magritteweeds.

Monique, you are stunningly beautiful. I've seen your photos. Why you don't have guys breaking down your door I do not know, but then again, here, where I live, evidently, even at dances and stuff, they stand around drinking beer and not going up and talking to women or asking them to dance. They make the women go to them. Screw that. In the end, I have none of it figured out and ultimately I'm not helping in the least. Wish I could, though.


----------



## mossystate (Sep 30, 2007)

Even a tumblweeds like a bit of hair control.

Tina, thanks for the nice words. I was being pretty silly. Fact of the matter is, I do not put myself ' out there '. Yes, would be nice if a few men were a bit more direct, but, I am a weeny. I doubt dances would ever be my thing, so I will just have to figure things out, one of these days.

Now, back to fruit and tumbleweeds..oh my!


----------



## Tina (Sep 30, 2007)

It's when you're not even looking or thinking about it that The Guy will enter your life. 

Dances aren't my thing, either, any more.


----------



## mopardmc (Oct 3, 2007)

I've been trying to figure out lately, is what makes women so beautiful, just in general. I'm not even talking about fat women in particular. I mean all women. Granted, like the guys fa_man_stan is talking about, pear-shaped women excite me in a way nothing else does, but I've been able to pin that down to a particular hormonal response, and it's purely sexual. I get the same thing at times from bellies and at other times from breasts, but this is just my genetic programming kicking into gear like it should.

However, what has really been puzzling me, is a reaction that occurs just a few evolutionary layers higher in the visual cortex processor. When I see a female, of any age, stature, size or shape, I immediately sense an innate, raw beauty about her face, her figure, or her clothing... or maybe it's something in the energy within that I merely attribute to visual data.

Women are just beautiful, period.

There's a woman I see sometimes who is the wife of a roughened older fellow who mows my lawn. There's an old saying for these kind of people who have spent life outside doing hard work, "they look like ten miles of bad road", and it really applies to both of them. However even when I look at her wrinkled face and missing teeth, perched atop a tortured and tired shell of a body, that ephemeral feminine beauty is right there, shining through, as if it were completely untethered anything physical, save for the gender of the soul it emanates from.

It is truly a wonderful thing, but still puzzling to me what causes it.

I wonder, does anyone else experience this, men or women? For women, do you see it in men?


----------



## RevolOggerp (Oct 3, 2007)

Santaclear said:


> Pear-shapers carry more of their weight in their legs and bottom, bigger butt.
> 
> Apple shapes - bigger belly, more of their weight in the top part of their body, smaller legs and butt.


Oh, I thought you were referring to something like "apple bottoms" and "onion bottoms".


----------



## stan_der_man (Oct 3, 2007)

mossystate said:


> ... I hated the obsession with ' types ' and I hated the hatred of fat, female bodies. I do still think that outside of Dims, men who like ' thick ', like pears or hourglass are the norm..but..yeah...there are a few belly lovers roaming around these parts..well, not MY parts... Oh, and I am a bit disillusioned over the lack of suitable men out here for me...I mean, I placed my order..sheesh!...*L*


Being a guy, I'm not on the receiving end of this, so I don't really know... I wonder if this issue of body shapes is uniquely a FA thing or if so called "normal sized" women also deal with this? I was reading on another thread about the dearth of quality FAs, and the preponderance of flaky or bad behavior on the part of the male FAs (this is always my impetus to talk about this sort of thing, body shape perceptions, relations between FAs and big gals...), and I keep thinking to myself that it doesn't have to be this way, but why is it this way? I think all these things are part of the greater problem. In my opinion, the problem keeps coming back to the issue that fat acceptance isn't considered "normal" by our societal standards, and there are no social structures or examples for FAs to follow... no peer support. Other than within Dimensions (and not necessarily here either...), the FAs are operating in a "moral vacuum" and the women are left out in the cold. Also, the disproportionately greater numbers of women to men create a situation where the men can get away with doing what's easy and weasely, and sometimes the good intentioned men get swarmed by ravenous women and it goes to their heads, or they just make stupid decisions. I wonder if some sort of "FA gentleman's club" that is audacious enough to lay out a "FA code of conduct" could be a shining light for the FAs discovering and / or exploring their attraction to fat women.





Tina said:


> ...
> Monique, you are stunningly beautiful. I've seen your photos. Why you don't have guys breaking down your door I do not know,
> ...


I completely agree with Tina! You are an incredibly beautiful woman Monique, your hair, complexion, from what I've seen of you in photographs. You take absolutely stunning pictures of yourself (being a married man of course, I don't look that closely...), there is no reason for you to not have quality guys knocking on your door. But I can completely understand that the dances aren't your scene, in some ways I enjoyed them in other ways I didn't, they can be superficial and that gets old quickly.

Just as tangent... Tina you mentioned how surreal it was to have modeled in Dimensions (the print magazine) and how there were guys coming out of the woodwork to meet you. When I was single, I remember getting that magazine, seeing your picture and thinking that there is no way a woman like you would want to meet a guy like me, let alone that I would be having a written dialog on a web board with you 10 (+/- ?) years later. Sandie-SR, Risible, Deidra and other Dims models that I've met, have turned out to be such wonderful, nice and down to earth people. I never would have imagined that from seeing them in Dims magazine. I think "having yourself out there" where guys can see (and hopefully appreciate) a woman is a double edged sword.



Tina said:


> but then again, here, where I live, evidently, even at dances and stuff, they stand around drinking beer and not going up and talking to women or asking them to dance. They make the women go to them. Screw that. In the end, I have none of it figured out and ultimately I'm not helping in the least. Wish I could, though.


Another thing that I think isn't happening... the fat acceptance "scene" hasn't "matured", or is just starting to do so. By this I mean that couples who meet at the dances are eventually getting married, they vanish into "marital bliss" and move on to wherever it is that they move on to. They essentially leave the scene. (By "scene" I mean the large size dances, NAAFA, online communities, whatever...) These are just generalizations of course, but there isn't a strong presence of married couples in places like Dimensions for example. There are plenty of individuals who are married that are on Dimensions, but I think the atmosphere is predominately a "singles scene". I think the married (or couples) men feel pressure against, or discouragement from being on Dimensions, or being part of the size acceptance community because their wives have memories of these scenes being predominantly comprised of voracious man hunting women. I think this is changing with more Dimensions get-togethers happening, there is an increasing presence of socializing in an environment where there are mixed couples and singles in a more "family" sort of atmosphere as opposed to a "singles" type of environment. It's this whole "normal" environment that exists in the "real world" that doesn't (or is beginning to...) exist in Dimensions and the size acceptance scene. Why should a guy (FA) seek a relationship with a (large sized) woman when there is nothing (that can be obviously seen) beyond the singles scene? There is no example of good things that would come out of getting involved in a relationship, or very few examples. And, the women are plentiful, when one woman makes an ultimatum to commit to her, or move on... you are seeing the guys move on because there are plenty of other women to move on to. The vortex of bad behavior continues, the women get disillusioned and quite frankly, often get bitter and turn off potential suiters, the few that are there to begin with.

In short, if attraction to fat women could be "normalized" having more men be comfortable with their attraction to fat women (or learning to appreciate their beauty), there would be more better behaved men available for the women, more examples of why the men should behave, and a "mature" scene would be created so support the potential couples. There would more examples of this all working out and a true culture of size acceptance would be created. Maybe this is a silly utopian vision, but I think always harping on the men as being a bunch of ill behaved jerks (as they may very well be) is simplistic, and not solving the problem. All of these problems (trying to return to topic...) including FAs dwelling on body shape, behaving badly, whatever... are just symptoms of this greater problem in my opinion.





mopardmc said:


> I've been trying to figure out lately, is what makes women so beautiful, just in general. I'm not even talking about fat women in particular. I mean all women. Granted, like the guys fa_man_stan is talking about, pear-shaped women excite me in a way nothing else does, but I've been able to pin that down to a particular hormonal response,
> ...
> Women are just beautiful, period.
> ...
> I wonder, does anyone else experience this, men or women? For women, do you see it in men?


Firstly, glad to see you posting on Dimensions Mopardmc. I really don't know what exactly it is that attracts men to women, women to men, men to men, or women to women, dogs to cats, dogs to dogs, whatever... I think you pointed out something very important though, that beauty is an appreciation that can take many forms and even change over time. No matter how much a person might try to deny it, I think all humans are attracted to "beauty" of some sort, or at least some sort of ideal that they perceive, or learn to appreciate during their lives. That attraction or drive towards an "ideal" (whatever it may be) is what brings us together and keeps us from being a bunch of loners.


Stan


----------



## ashmamma84 (Oct 3, 2007)

chickadee said:


> A lot of women don't fit in the "pear" or "apple" category. Go to the mall or the supermarket and check out the ladies.
> 
> For instance, you could have a big bust, small waist, and narrow hips. Then you're a "triangle," I suppose.



I agree -- just as I've mentioned before; I'm a hybrid of sorts, and I'm okay with that. I'm not a pear or an hourglass...and surely not an apple. 

But I can understand the frustration some women might feel, especially if they are apple shaped -- you can't help the hand you're dealt. 

And yes -- I do think straight sized women deal with this as well; alot of women want the "perfect" figure...and that is hourglass, whether the woman is a size 8 or 28.


----------



## ctman5 (Oct 4, 2007)

love your post, and i would love to talk to you as well.


----------



## Tina (Oct 6, 2007)

Hi Stan. Sorry this has sat for so long; I got kind of lost for a few days there moving preparations!).


fa_man_stan said:


> Just as tangent... Tina you mentioned how surreal it was to have modeled in Dimensions (the print magazine) and how there were guys coming out of the woodwork to meet you. When I was single, I remember getting that magazine, seeing your picture and thinking that there is no way a woman like you would want to meet a guy like me, let alone that I would be having a written dialog on a web board with you 10 (+/- ?) years later.


Thank you, Stan.  You would have been wrong, though. I would have thought you to be cute, smart, funny, sensitive, thoughtful -- all of the things I find you to be now. Having never been the snob type, it always amazes me when guys say this sort of thing to me, because while I think that each of us has our own, unique talents and attributes, I don't feel I'm anything special in the grand scheme of things. My sweetie, Eric, has said such things to me before, and it always surprises me. 

Aside from those few who get all caught up in the 'being a model' thing, I think most women who have been in the mag are just who they are -- are just themselves and not caught up in getting huge ego strokes or being set apart and better than other women (a mindset I find repulsive, frankly).

Thanks much for the sweet words, Stan. Ya made me smile. Like this, see? --> 

I've been offline most of the last week, but for a few minutes here and there. You mention an FA Code of Conduct thread and I've seen that but haven't have a chance to read it lately. I'm going to go look at it now...


----------



## TrueFeminineAdmirer (Feb 6, 2008)

Non-BBW ladies can in the best of hypotheses inspire me feelings of
protection, caring sympathy. Gentle hugs, tender kisses. Basically,
no hormonal (s)urge that would make me get physical in a sexual
way. Just a somewhat warmer day in the cold season.

Adult women mandatorily spot nothing less than generous assets.
Nothing can change my mind about the fact a large soft navel
is a feminine sexual attribute exactly like wide hips and
(I was about to forget) breasts. I love it as wide as possible,
as long as it doesn't hang over a woman's sex (said that, I
just adore the sight of a woman's breasts relaxed down her
navel.) Whole figured women to me are walking advertisings to
sex, their navel and hips stand as the center of a warm radiating
sun.

Pear shaped ladies are ideally the Best Of Both Worlds...


----------

