# Improving one's self esteem



## Sasquatch! (Jun 5, 2010)

Not that I really lack self-esteem, being a pompous and egotistical git--but I keep noticing people on here mentioning low self-esteem.

So how exactly does one "cure" this?


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## rellis10 (Jun 5, 2010)

It's not as simple as 'curing' it. Some people are just crushed by this and it'll always be there. I have always had low self-esteem. I'v been terrified of what others thought of me for a long time and i believe i'm only just getting over that.

I cant say this works for everyone, but here what i think is helping me.

1) Find something you're good at: Could be anything, for me it's writing. If you can find something i'm sure you can find people who appreciate that and will encourage you. This increases confidence in your own abilities and will help you branch out.

2) Talk to people: Now i'm not saying you should tell any old person everything about yourself. But look to those you trust for advice and help. Another person's point of view can give you a whole new image of yourself.

3) Do something that scares you: Not everyday, or every week...just once can do it. For me it was posting my first topless pictures (or indeed any pictures) on the internet. I never showed myself like that and i was terrified of the feedback i'd get. But i got great feedback and it's helping me break down barriers in my lack of confidence.

I sincerely hope this helps somebody.


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## djudex (Jun 5, 2010)

LIVE LIFE THE COURAGE WOLF WAY






















PROFIT


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## WillSpark (Jun 5, 2010)

For me it was a buildup from crushed self-esteem to amazing self-confidence in just about a year. It started when I jumped off a freaking scary cliff, and it all just ramped up from there, taking some more risks that were highly rewarding and gave me a huge boost. 

I also need to give props to this site for being a huge boost as well.


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## Zowie (Jun 5, 2010)

"When life gives you lemons, add gin and tonic."

I just tell myself I'm awesomesauce and move on. 

Try it, I'm serious. Compliment yourself out loud.


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## JenFromOC (Jun 5, 2010)

Find someone that thinks you're hot and make them tell you so about 30 times a day.


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## rellis10 (Jun 5, 2010)

JenFromOC said:


> Find someone that thinks you're hot and make them tell you so about 30 times a day.



Not even that...you merely hinted you liked one of my pictures and it perked me up all day


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## Stevenz1inoc (Jun 5, 2010)

JenFromOC said:


> Find someone that thinks you're hot and make them tell you so about 30 times a day.




I'm sure you're told quite often how hot you are!


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## veil (Jun 5, 2010)

bionic_eggplant said:


> "When life gives you lemons, add gin and tonic."
> 
> I just tell myself I'm awesomesauce and move on.
> 
> Try it, I'm serious. Compliment yourself out loud.



honestly, to do that--and i do as well--you kind of need to have at least okayish self esteem to begin with.


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## KotR (Jun 5, 2010)

In some ways I'm confident, but others I'm not.

Recently I just had my first sexual relationship. Apparently I did well in the sack despite my noobness, and overall I'm supposedly this awesome guy, but after a few times the girl pretty much told me I'm not "the one" and things went downhill for me from there. Didn't help she botched a text message she meant for another guy claiming I had "dibs" on her for the night.

Anyway, I've had more than my fair share of back-handed compliments over the years that I just don't take praise very well at all. It's hard to feel awesome when you've been unemployed for a while. It's hard to feel cool when you haven't made any new friends in years. It's even worse when you're almost 27 and still have no clue what you wanna do with your life while you can hop on Facebook and see people you left behind after high school being done with college, having jobs, starting families, and so on.

Socially, I don't believe I'm inept. I can't even say I'm misunderstood. I just feel like I have different priorities that can sometimes alienate others, like having zero interest in booze or drugs.


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## spiritangel (Jun 5, 2010)

It is a great question and I think it truly goes hand and hand with the whole journey to self acceptance

Self esteem is firstly about letting go of the need to find validation outside of ourselves and this is something society teaches from an early age so is not a quick fix overnight thing it is about unlearning what you have been conditioned to believe and re learning it as it comes from within you and what others think whilst it is nice or not nice should not change who you are


Getting rid of the internal negative self chatter we ALL do as this is one of the most powerful self esteem destroyers there is, when you find yourself being negative it is a matter of catching that thought and turning it into something positive again this takes time I mean these are habits we have picked up over a lifetime

In some ways its about not waiting for someone else to do or say something to make us feel good but taking back our personal power and doing it for ourselves.

I could write reams on this not only having lived it but also having helped loads of people through low self esteem

dont beat yourself up when you have a weak moment, learn to embrace and love who you are faults and all, and for some of us its a lifelong journey for others it is easier, it is about being at peace with that and knowing that, and finding tools to help yourself overcome it. 

Hugs and sorry for the huge post


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## BigChaz (Jun 6, 2010)

spiritangel said:


> dont beat yourself up when you have a weak moment, learn to embrace and love who you are faults and all, and for some of us its a lifelong journey for others it is easier, it is about being at peace with that and knowing that, and finding tools to help yourself overcome it.



When I make mistakes, have a "weak" moment, etc I make sure I know what I did and what I need to do to fix it or avoid it in the future. If I beat myself up a little bit in the process, I am OK with that. Life is about getting beaten up and getting strong for it. Just don't let the beating up part become who you are. 

I don't want to accept my faults, problems, etc. I want to acknowledge them and I want to actively work on them and fix them...

I am not saying you are wrong, I am just explaining my position! Whatever works for you is obviously the best for you!


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## talpa (Jun 6, 2010)

All excellent advice from everyone. 

Self esteem is a tricky mistress. If theres something in particular you think might be giving you low self esteem , then youll need to look at that as an issue in itself. See if you can either work it out yourself or find someone (a friend or someone professional) to talk to about it.

But for general self esteem raisingness, then nothing beats feeling good about your physical self.
Teeth clean and flossed? 
Hair washed, combed or brushed? 
Facial hair under control (or not, depending on how you roll)
Showered and deodoranted?
Clean, ironed and lint free clothes?
Shoes polished, or trainers de-gunked? 
If youve done all that, then congratulations, you win. Now go out and unleash yourself upon the world. 

@rellis10 Seriously, if you were 10 years older, Id have commented.


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## spiritangel (Jun 6, 2010)

BigChaz said:


> When I make mistakes, have a "weak" moment, etc I make sure I know what I did and what I need to do to fix it or avoid it in the future. If I beat myself up a little bit in the process, I am OK with that. Life is about getting beaten up and getting strong for it. Just don't let the beating up part become who you are.
> 
> I don't want to accept my faults, problems, etc. I want to acknowledge them and I want to actively work on them and fix them...
> 
> I am not saying you are wrong, I am just explaining my position! Whatever works for you is obviously the best for you!



I diddnt say you couldnt work on changing those things but they are still a part of who you are, it is always good to learn from your mistakes, I guess it is how we choose to see it that makes a difference


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## RJI (Jun 6, 2010)

For me self esteem came with confidence and confidence came with repetition. I just put myself out in situations I wasn't previously comfortable with and gradually built up my confidence as I became more familiar with my surroundings. I am still a little nervous sometimes when trying new things but I adapt quickly and conquer the nerves until I own the situation.


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## Wanderer (Jun 6, 2010)

Well, I might as well "weigh in" on the topic. 

I _love_ being the center of attention (I'm an actor, after all). But the fact is, I've never really had anyone like me as more than a Friend. Even the few people who've tried to take me to bed weren't interested in me... just in sex.

It tends to wear down your self-esteem when so many people in your life make sure to disagree with you. 

Now, admittedly, I'm curently depressed (I mean, I'm stuck in my sister's back room, she guilt-trips me every time I try for a job, I spend entirely too much time taking care of her kids, and I'm hungry; I think a degree of depression is warranted). But I find writing about it to be a good means of dealing with low self-esteem. Once you externalize it, it's easier to see it for what it is.


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## seasuperchub84 (Jun 6, 2010)

djudex, THAT IS AWESOME!!!!! Im putting that as my background! When I graduate from my masters in psychology program, Im giving those to my adolescent kids and punk rock kids!


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## Joe944 (Jun 6, 2010)

KotR said:


> In some ways I'm confident, but others I'm not.
> 
> Recently I just had my first sexual relationship. Apparently I did well in the sack despite my noobness, and overall I'm supposedly this awesome guy, but after a few times the girl pretty much told me I'm not "the one" and things went downhill for me from there. Didn't help she botched a text message she meant for another guy claiming I had "dibs" on her for the night.
> 
> ...



Whoa, are you my twin? Hahaha. I'm in a very similar situation, just started going back to school at 26. When I was younger I was voted most likely to succeed too, and just maybe I'll be able to fulfill that role.


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## escapist (Jun 6, 2010)

Sasquatch! said:


> Not that I really lack self-esteem, being a pompous and egotistical git--but I keep noticing people on here mentioning low self-esteem.
> 
> So how exactly does one "cure" this?



I would say you can start by not giving such a big focus. The only person having the self esteem issue is you. Nobody else cares if your not _(hot/sex/cool/smart/funny)_ enough to hit their radar. They only care if you are hot and confident enough to show up on it. You want to know why the ugly drunk guy at the bar gets laid after a night of being loud and obnoxious and flirting with the few women who test him to see if he has high value? 1 He doesn't care what he looks like. 2. He's not afraid to put it out their that he thinks she's sexy (or that he thinks he's sexy)....after all he's freaking drunk! So my point...move your mind past your worry. Focus on having fun not wondering if your perfect.

Here is another big one. Find out who you really are before you even bother wondering who other people think you are. You never have to apologize for the fact that 10% of the people you meat don't like you. Guess what there will always be someone you don't connect with. We all have different things that make us tick. Let other people feel attracted to who you are and let them seek you out. Don't go around looking for people, friends, or girlfriends who like you. When you click and vibe with someone you can feel it. Be naturally screening. Why would you want people around you who don't like you for who you are in the first place? So, like I said, know who you are, and don't be afraid to show that person to the world and let others like that person too. They are the only real friends and connections you need in the world anyways.

Learn to see yourself for the value you truly have. To yourself and to others. Its hard to have self esteem if you have no self worth. When was the last time you sacrificed anything for yourself, a loved one, or even a stranger? I really mean sacrificing too. Give with your heart, give so its meaningful to you and to others. If I had a million dollars I probably couldn't care less if I gave a bum $5 or even $100, but if I was near homeless and broke and took my last dollar and split it on a loaf of bread with someone who needed as bad as I did. We would both feel gratitude and value. 

Taking the time to take care of yourself is HUGE too. Ever notice how much better you feel sometimes just from getting a new shirt or a haircut. Sometimes that little extra effort to do something a little different and make ourselves more presentable can go a long way to realizing there is more than just an ugly duckling about (remember the real ugly duckling was a swan and just didn't know it). I used to go out in sweats and a T-Shirt to the store all the time now, thats more like 5% of the time. Most the time I'll put on Jean's, a nice T-Shirt, nice shoes, a bracelet or a watch, do my hair and make sure I have less than 2 days growth on my face lol. Granted this is also cause I learned going to the store is PRIME TIME FLIRTING. Lots of attractive women looking for the right cut of meat, and all the time in the world to find the right melons you like lol.

Once you have followed all the previous steps don't let them go. Revisit them often and _make sure your on your own track_. _Never give away your ability to know and love yourself to someone else_. Allow yourself to appreciate the kind thoughts and feelings of others but never require them. Wish nothing but the best to those who speak negativity of you. They simply haven't learned the same few steps you did or they wouldn't even need to tell you, "you don't measure up to _Their_ standards". Only people who truly care will try to pick you up. Non-friends tend to think the way to make it is by putting you down. Those who have truly progressed in themselves will realize they can get to even higher levels when they start to care about everyone with at least as much care as they give themselves. They also know better than to give more than they have. By keeping 10% in reserve for themselves is not selfish; its what gives them the ability to give so much in the first place, because they don't try to give more than they have.


_*Quick Review*_

*1.* _Don't focus on negative thoughts_ (and image issues).
- Free your mind for fun.
- When you free to have fun, you can be fun for yourself and others.

*2.* _Know who you are_. Your values, your ideals, what makes you tick.
- Don't look for others, let others notice you because you know who you are and you put yourself out there to be seen.

*3.* By knowing yourself (#2) you can start to _find your self worth_ based on your own value system not one set by others.
- This usually requires some sacrifice of time, energy, money, or all 3.

*4.* Once you know your self worth, who you are, and your values, _present yourself mind body and spirit in a manner that reflects how you feel about yourself_. Make it a conscious effort.
- Don't be afraid to express yourself and look good (Remember #2 only true friends really matter).

*5.* Review, re-analyze, and recommit to making this a life long pattern and habit that will carry you your whole life though. Chances are you will add to the list your own steps that you find useful. I myself enjoy going hiking finding a nice place to sit where I feel surrounded by the energy of the universe and just soaking it in and marveling at how good it feels to be alive and to be who I am.

You'll know its really working, when people start asking you questions like this, and much of what I just said is the first thing that comes to mind.




JenFromOC said:


> Find someone that thinks you're hot and make them tell you so about 30 times a day.



Only problem with this method is your actually giving someone else the power to dictate who are, what you are, and how you feel. Oh and its just a bit creepy...I kind of hope you were joking but I know a lot of people think that way.

**** _Just remember what can be given can also be taken away._ So if someone is giving you "self esteem", thy can take "self-esteem". not that it was ever self-esteem to begin with. It was only ego stroking (or a boost). An ego boost is just that, only a boost. Its not a long term solution and its highly Dependant on others. Which in the long run is unsustainable and has a tendency to create unhealthy dependency's usually leading to one or all parties becoming very unstable and unhappy.

---------------------------------
Joe, Kotr, and many, many, others, its not to late I didn't really start to get all this until my 30's. It changed my world, I've had some GREAT relationships. Even the ones that didn't make were fantastic. The women were fantastic, the experiences were fantastic, and at the very least I had fun and learned something. Sure sometimes that stuff can hurt, but OMFG I think I'd be willing to cut off a few fingers if it meant I got to go on the trip of a lifetime, and do it with some good friends, and great loves like I have. It does sound like your not really putting yourself out there to be found. There are plenty of great people who don't like to drink or do drugs or at the very least do it very little. I'm one of them. It doesn't stop me from going out and having fun though, or from connecting with people who are almost total opposites. Often in the course of conversation we connect on other topics, interests, experiences, or hobbies.

Kotr, it sounds like she thought it was just sex, and you thought it was something more (she might have even thought it was really good sex with a guy she liked). All you really did was learn that sometimes women like to play around and have fun too. I don't think I'd be too upset that a woman found you attracted but wasn't ready to commit. I don't think to many people meet someone and go, "Oh I found the person I'm spending the rest of my life with"...and those who do are probably looking at a world of hurt since they were deluded enough to think there is such thing as a perfect life and a perfect love. Real relationships take a lot of time to build the trust that becomes the foundation of a strong lasting relationship. If you wanted more and were willing to end your physical relationship in the demand that she be only yours perhaps you should have told her. Then you would both be free to commit to each other or move on. Cause I'm pretty sure she felt free enough to test the waters until she knew what the boundaries were...that is if your presenting the story accurately.

Lets be honest tons of you knew I was going to post something like this.


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## seasuperchub84 (Jun 6, 2010)

I just wanted to say with me weight gain was the opposite from what most people experienced. When I gained weight, I became more extroverted and less introverted. I felt a larger body was simply right for me.  I always feel so damn bad for guys and girls who have that issue with their bodies. Its a matter of sitting down and asking, is it me or is it society.

1. Do I (thinking of no one else) like my body?
2. How does other people view my body?
3. How does this affect my views on my body?
4. How can I change my mental outlook to view my body as a positive thing?

Lets take 2 scenarios. Lets say 1 scenario is a guy who loves his body. This then would be the following answers.

1. I love my body.
2. They dont like it very much. I have some limited friends online who like my appearance, but thats it.
3. It can affect it negatively, but I honestly like myself and the way I am image wise.
4. Look past the opinions of people. Since I have to hold myself in high regard, show others that you "own" it. Monique is an awesome example of a celebrity who owns her big body. She doesnt care what any body says.

2nd scenario is of a guy who hates his body.

1. I hate my body.
2. People dont like it very much. I have some limited friends online who like my appearance, however I have communicated to them that I do not care for it.
3. It can affect it negatively, however since I also dislike how I look, I can change. I will try to find a support group to help me begin a weight loss journey.
4. Work with the opinions of people (to some extent). Ask questions to medical practitioners about the best way to lose weight. Join a constructive fitness club (like weight watchers or nutrisystem). Join sites like obesityhelp.com.

In the case of both people, they both can use ways to pick up their self esteem for their imagine. In scenario A, that person has to start owning their image. Look at your belly in the mirror and enjoy it. Smile at pictures of yourself. Enjoy the work you do and constantly say Im doing this right, even when people say your wrong (however keep an open mind for constructive criticism, try to determine the difference between that and bashing (the attitude of the person giving the advice makes all the difference, trust me I know all too well)).
In scenario B, the person realizes this is something affecting their self esteem, and they realize there is resources to help them change because they really desire it. 

The only difference between the two scenarios is that they have different paths to choose. One is an inward modification and the other is an external modification. The other person looks externally for ways to change, while the other person looks internally for ways to change their perspective.


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## escapist (Jun 6, 2010)

I should admit here I'm totally Body Dysmorphic...I have a hard time realizing sometimes that I'm over 500 lbs because I'm not limited like people think of a 500 lb person being disabled.

Also I actually go fat so people would leave me alone. When I got down to 250 I got so much attention it freaked me out. I had lived a totally sheltered life, so to have women trying to get in my pants almost overnight was just down right freaky. I also realized that people LIE, people said its what on the inside that matters. Sure its true to a point, but I don't think ___[Insert Pop Diva Name here]___ would get all the attention she gets if she was 600 lbs. 

In Vegas at 250 working in a Casino I was hit on day and night by Men and women, for someone who was the kind of shy fat kid in school from a little logging and farm town it was total culture shock. I put back on about 100 lbs in 1 year. The Irony was once I gained my confidence again I found out I still had game at 400+ lbs. I never needed to put on the wight, I just had to be more secure with who I was and put up proper healthy boundaries.


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## karmacomba (Jun 6, 2010)

There's soem really good advice in this thread - some sounds basic, but it really does work, especially the hygiene + appearance stuff.

I have spent the vast majority of my life with low self-esteem issues which I started to get sorted out this year by going to a counsellor. If you find yourself in the same position as me i.e. completely unable to function bcause of it, then it can be a good course of action with the right professional. It doesn't 'cure' you but in my experience at least it pointed out things to me I never knew about myself, some of the reasons behind my low self-esteem.

Example;
I notice a couple of guys talking about going back to nightschool. I did the same over the last few years, and finished my degree (I think you'd call it a major in the USA?) last year. I thought that would be a big filip for me but it wasn't - IN MY CASE I MEAN, not saying it wont work for you guys. My counsellor asked me was I proud of my degree, did I have it in a frame etc. and I laughed and said no, its in a box somewhere. She asked me if I thought getting the degree was a big deal, and I said no and started talkin about how I thought it was easy compared to some other degrees etc. And thats when she stopped me dead in my tracks, and said 'listen to yourself - you can't even give yourself a bit of self-praise for that...you have to learn not to belittle what you HAVE achieved and give yourself credit for it'. I never realised I was doing it up till then, and since that day I've caught myself so many times doing the same with other things. I'm learning not to be so negative about small things - its helping me start to look at my other bigger problems with more clarity.

Hope that helps!


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## escapist (Jun 6, 2010)

karmacomba said:


> There's soem really good advice in this thread - some sounds basic, but it really does work, especially the hygiene + appearance stuff.
> 
> I have spent the vast majority of my life with low self-esteem issues which I started to get sorted out this year by going to a counsellor. If you find yourself in the same position as me i.e. completely unable to function bcause of it, then it can be a good course of action with the right professional. It doesn't 'cure' you but in my experience at least it pointed out things to me I never knew about myself, some of the reasons behind my low self-esteem.
> 
> ...



Totally know what you mean. I didn't finish my degree till I was in my early 30's. Yep its in a box too, still in the original mailer. No job I go on really cares that I even have it, they only care if you can do the work. I really just did it for me. I think in the end I learned getting a degree was more about persistence and tenacity than book smarts. No matter what it felt good just to finish something, especially since I never even finished high school...even with that I only got a GED (in my mid 20's) because it made me feel better about myself. I might frame mine some day, but it really does feel good just knowing its in that box and I did the work to earn it.


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## BigChaz (Jun 6, 2010)

escapist said:


> Totally know what you mean. I didn't finish my degree till I was in my early 30's. Yep its in a box too, still in the original mailer. No job I go on really cares that I even have it, they only care if you can do the work. I really just did it for me. I think in the end I learned getting a degree was more about persistence and tenacity than book smarts. No matter what it felt good just to finish something, especially since I never even finished high school...even with that I only got a GED (in my mid 20's) because it made me feel better about myself. I might frame mine some day, but it really does feel good just knowing its in that box and I did the work to earn it.



What is your profession?


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## escapist (Jun 6, 2010)

BigChaz said:


> What is your profession?



Don't remember our discussion on this a while back? 

...besides doing sales, IT is the only field I know were you can make 100k a year with no official education in the corporate world.


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## KotR (Jun 7, 2010)

To be fair, she wasn't forthcoming about the sex being her main interest or objected to me taking her out for dinner or movies. Also, when she asks things like, "Am I your girlfriend?" I kind of get the impression that maybe she was also looking for something longterm. Granted, I wasn't thinking her the one either, but the way I took it was basically her saying, "You're not good enough to keep in my life." I believe my response was, and this whole conversation was after we'd gotten it on, "And you've come to this conclusion so quickly?" All she really had to say about it was, "Women's intuition." Later on it became, "I don't want to be shackled by you or this area." Also found out she was moving in September and never wanted to come back.

Personally, I don't like where I live, either. Sadly, without money or a goal I could focus on, I don't know where I'd even go, let alone if it'd be the right choice. I'm a cautious person because I was basically bullied and such while growing up. I wouldn't say I'm timid, but I really don't jump into anything unless I see myself coming out of it unharmed. I put myself out for her. Seemed like she was just interested in using me. Lesson learned. Not really crying about it, but can't say it's helped my overall perspective of there being "the one" for me.

As is, guess you could say I'm more artistically inclined. I draw a little. I write some. I like movies. I like anime. I like manga. I like RPGs. Around here, I can't say I've heard of a haven for like-minded people. There are no arcades, manga shops, and theaters aren't exactly the best way to meet people in a dark room where everyone else wants you to be quiet. I don't really give a shit about sports. Cars bore me. Our little town has 5 bars, none of which I want to go near given my aversion to intoxicants. Frankly, I'd be fine with a bunch of net friends, but of late, even that well has seemed dry as I seem to find more trolls than bridges they can lurk under.


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## escapist (Jun 7, 2010)

KotR said:


> To be fair, she wasn't forthcoming about the sex being her main interest or objected to me taking her out for dinner or movies. Also, when she asks things like, "Am I your girlfriend?" I kind of get the impression that maybe she was also looking for something longterm. Granted, I wasn't thinking her the one either, but the way I took it was basically her saying, "You're not good enough to keep in my life." I believe my response was, and this whole conversation was after we'd gotten it on, "And you've come to this conclusion so quickly?" All she really had to say about it was, "Women's intuition." Later on it became, "I don't want to be shackled by you or this area." Also found out she was moving in September and never wanted to come back.
> 
> Personally, I don't like where I live, either. Sadly, without money or a goal I could focus on, I don't know where I'd even go, let alone if it'd be the right choice. I'm a cautious person because I was basically bullied and such while growing up. I wouldn't say I'm timid, but I really don't jump into anything unless I see myself coming out of it unharmed. I put myself out for her. Seemed like she was just interested in using me. Lesson learned. Not really crying about it, but can't say it's helped my overall perspective of there being "the one" for me.
> 
> As is, guess you could say I'm more artistically inclined. I draw a little. I write some. I like movies. I like anime. I like manga. I like RPGs. Around here, I can't say I've heard of a haven for like-minded people. There are no arcades, manga shops, and theaters aren't exactly the best way to meet people in a dark room where everyone else wants you to be quiet. I don't really give a shit about sports. Cars bore me. Our little town has 5 bars, none of which I want to go near given my aversion to intoxicants. Frankly, I'd be fine with a bunch of net friends, but of late, even that well has seemed dry as I seem to find more trolls than bridges they can lurk under.



Hhehehe-heh no offence but you remind me of a certain little boy I know who yells, "I can't, I can't, I can't!". Its hard to even conceive of possibilities when you are busy trying to convince yourself you have no options. I happen to know someone who lives there who is a HUGE gamer and LOVES living there because its where the Origins Game Fair is held. He goes for days on end and just does RPG stuff. I do believe he said they had a theater room set up there where all they played was Anime.

My own experience tells me that most people tend to not be "A special Snowflake". You often have more in common with people than you realize even people who are vastly different and come from other parts of the world. As for where to meet people, I don't know man I open my door and I see people all around that I don't know....yet.

As for a goal, that often extends from my list of things to do to improve self-esteem. Once you know who you are and what makes you tick stick with it. If your truly a creative individual it shouldn't be hard to ask yourself what your dreams are and what will make them them come true. Start small and simple if you have too. Don't focus on what you don't have, focus on what it is you want. Don't just fantasize, take action. You can't move a mountain in a day, but you can make one hell of a dent if you take daily action. You can obliterate it if you want it so bad that you find the the creativity and drive to inspire others to join you on your quest.


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## JenFromOC (Jun 8, 2010)

escapist said:


> Only problem with this method is your actually giving someone else the power to dictate who are, what you are, and how you feel. Oh and its just a bit creepy...I kind of hope you were joking but I know a lot of people think that way.
> 
> **** _Just remember what can be given can also be taken away._ So if someone is giving you "self esteem", thy can take "self-esteem". not that it was ever self-esteem to begin with. It was only ego stroking (or a boost). An ego boost is just that, only a boost. Its not a long term solution and its highly Dependant on others. Which in the long run is unsustainable and has a tendency to create unhealthy dependency's usually leading to one or all parties becoming very unstable and unhappy.



You know, you did a good job trying to call me out on this....too bad I was being a sarcastic bitch. In fact, even creepier than having someone tell you that you're hot 30 times a day, is that you took so long to school us on how to have good self esteem. A bit much if you ask me. And yes, I just saw this post and had to comment.


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## TheMildlyStrangeone (Jun 8, 2010)

Might I suggest placating your lack of esteem with a detailed story about yourself filled with embellishments and outright lies. Massaging the truth, instead of working on your inner self is the path of least resistance. You can bill yourself as a plus-sized James Bond (importer and exporter of food). Just because you feel like crap about yourself, doesn't mean you can't just make up great things to make others think you are awesome.


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## escapist (Jun 8, 2010)

JenFromOC said:


> You know, you did a good job trying to call me out on this....too bad I was being a sarcastic bitch. In fact, even creepier than having someone tell you that you're hot 30 times a day, is that you took so long to school us on how to have good self esteem. A bit much if you ask me. And yes, I just saw this post and had to comment.



You might be a sarcastic bitch but it was a good point. Like I said some people really do think like that. They go seeking external validation of what should be internal. I'm glad it had you riveted enough to read the whole thing. Perhaps I might consider your services as a proof reader and editor in the future.


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## JenFromOC (Jun 8, 2010)

escapist said:


> You might be a sarcastic bitch but it was a good point. Like I said some people really do think like that. They go seeking external validation of what should be internal. I'm glad it had you riveted enough to read the whole thing. Perhaps I might consider your services as a proof reader and editor in the future.




I didn't have to read the whole thing to know it was completely full of nonsense...I just read the part you wrote pertaining to my post. Thank you for considering my services, but I'm very busy, as I already work full time


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## escapist (Jun 8, 2010)

JenFromOC said:


> I didn't have to read the whole thing to know it was completely full of nonsense...I just read the part you wrote pertaining to my post. Thank you for considering my services, but I'm very busy, as I already work full time



It wasn't so much a consideration but a passing thought, I'm glad you have steady work. I'm not sure snarky comments work as constructive criticism. That said my remarks were hardly nonsense since the evidence of what was said was even in a reply to your comment:



rellis10 said:


> Not even that...you merely hinted you liked one of my pictures and it perked me up all day



You were being taken serious weather you meant to be or not. As sad as it may be sometimes people hear need to hear plain simple truth from time to time for it to register in their head. There is nothing wrong with being long winded as long as it serves a purpose and gets the message across as accurately as possible. If the world was full of mind readers we would have no need for primitive communication like writing since we could simple pass along thoughts feelings and emotions. Until that day arrives we will have to do with struggling for the right words to express ourselves even if it means drawing out comments which are only meant to hurt others and put them down rather than build them up and love them just as they are. 

I know I can be a silly git on here but I take a lot of what these guys say as pretty serious. I've spoken to a lot of the guys here in private. A lot of what they think and feel is very real. These are real issues and this site is one of the few places where they can be addressed with out nastiness, putting down or back-biting. The issue's BHM's have are no less important than the issues facing BBW's. Self-esteem is a BIG one. Tomorrow I have to go coach a friend of mine who had WLS but is still having a hard time moving past seeing himself as an unattractive fat guy. 

So we all enjoy a good laugh and a whatnot just realize the issues are real for some of us. The poking prodding and teasing is a big part of what makes others hide and afraid to post what they are really thinking of feeling. I would love to see some of the PM's and PM conversations I have be threads for others to read. Perhaps you would realize just how real and serious this is.

So hahha, all fun and good, but please let the people who want to take this conversation seriously do so knowing they will not be made fun of for their issues.


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## JenFromOC (Jun 8, 2010)

escapist said:


> It wasn't so much a consideration but a passing thought, I'm glad you have steady work. I'm not sure snarky comments work as constructive criticism. That said my remarks were hardly nonsense since the evidence of what was said was even in a reply to your comment:
> 
> 
> 
> ...



I've never made fun of anyone on this board. I hardly ever post anything of any importance. If you can find someone, please tell me about it and I will apologize. That said, my post was a joke and in reference to my own life. Since my separation, I tell everyone I just want to be told that I'm hot all day, every day. I'm sorry if you didn't get the joke, but I don't make posts solely for you. Now, can we take this to PM like I suggested? Or do you still want to have a pissing contest?


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## escapist (Jun 8, 2010)

JenFromOC said:


> I've never made fun of anyone on this board. I hardly ever post anything of any importance. If you can find someone, please tell me about it and I will apologize. That said, my post was a joke and in reference to my own life. Since my separation, I tell everyone I just want to be told that I'm hot all day, every day. I'm sorry if you didn't get the joke, but I don't make posts solely for you. Now, can we take this to PM like I suggested? Or do you still want to have a pissing contest?



My post was made before I received any PM this is not facebook were PM's pop up instantly, I have replied to your PM 2x already.



JenFromOC said:


> You know, you did a good job trying to call me out on this....too bad I was being a sarcastic bitch. In fact, even creepier than having someone tell you that you're hot 30 times a day, is that you took so long to school us on how to have good self esteem. A bit much if you ask me. And yes, I just saw this post and had to comment.



And how do you not see this post as an attack on someone and making light of a conversation topic they take serious? You can answer here or in PM. Or not answer at all I am fine either way.


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## escapist (Jun 8, 2010)

I think Jen and I worked it out, my comments on her post about getting complements 30x a day was not meant as an attack. To me it was a very real issue. One that I myself suffered from for a long time. It lead to a miserable downward spiral in my marriage. When you suck the life out of your partner seeking external validation every day it can destroy true love. I do realize she was joking, but like I said, some people have had issues with it. I am hardly the only one.


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## shhtx1970 (Jun 8, 2010)

wow, just reading this thread is depressing.

1 - GET OFF Facebook/myspace crap. These are time wasting sites. I am sorry but its the truth. Don't believe me watch southpark the Episode 1404: 
You Have 0 Friends. Seriously.

2 - Get drunk and sleep it off the next morning. Do this on a weekend since you dont want to lose your job.

3 - Find a good friend, preferrably male (female can work but...) and go to a strip/exotic dancer bar. Drink a few (and I mean 1-2 no more than 3) slowly. Get a few dances or spend a few bucks for titties in your face. Once you realize they are dancing for dollars, your life doesnt seem so pathetic.

4 - Now that you experienced something different, GET BACK TO YOUR LIFE.

5 - Quit trying to live the life that media portrays on TV where you are successful jackass with money coming out your ass and hot women just fall from the sky at your command. 

Look, live your life and enjoy it. When you start to live you wont have self-esteem issues. Also, enjoy the simple things in life, trying to please others is not easy so when you make them smile take it to heart. I enjoy my nieces smiles and laughter and same with my family, WHY? because its honest and untainted. Choose friends that appreciate you and who you are; not your wallet or car or something that is fleeting. 

:doh:I feel like a preacher ... someone knock me out.


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## escapist (Jun 8, 2010)

shhtx1970 said:


> :doh:I feel like a preacher ... someone knock me out.



I'm pretty sure there is a market for a church that preaches drinking and strippers.


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## djudex (Jun 8, 2010)

JenFromOC said:


> Since my separation, I tell everyone I just want to be told that I'm hot all day, every day.



Yer hawt.

See you in 15 for the next affirmation?


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## Wanderer (Jun 8, 2010)

shhtx1970 said:


> wow, just reading this thread is depressing.
> 
> 1 - GET OFF Facebook/myspace crap. These are time wasting sites. I am sorry but its the truth. Don't believe me watch southpark the Episode 1404:
> You Have 0 Friends. Seriously.
> ...



Well, in order:

1. Not on either one. I briefly had a LiveJournal over a year ago, but that's about it.

2. Can't stand alcoholic drinks. (They taste utterly rancid to me.) Mind you, I don't currently have a job to lose.

3. I went to a strip club once.

Eh. :/ Don't get me wrong, the dancers were good-looking, but they had all the style of a ten-dollar photo shoot and all the sincerity of a two-dollar lawyer. I didn't get aroused, I got _bored_. I hope they're not _all_ like that...

4. Don't you know? Anyone using the Internet _has_ no life!  Just ask my sister, who constantly forgets that I've actually met my online friends, gone to conventions, and actually visited my friends' homes in Real Life.

5. Nah, I don't want that life (though I wouldn't turn down the money). I just want a place to live, a decent intact car, and maybe, after I recover from living in the same house as my sister's not-quite-functional marriage, a relationship (preferably with a wife and kids).


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## karmacomba (Jun 8, 2010)

Escapist, 
I'd just like to sy +1 for a lot of the advice etc you've given in this thread.

To Kotr
one thing I'd say about your hobbies is that they're not all that social in nature. I'm not saying you should ditch them! But you might want to think about fitting something in your life that involves more contact with folks - but only if its something you'd enjoy doing. Or maybe you could join an art class to imrpove your drawing skills or something like that - you'd meet people with a common interest there. 
I've been in the same boat as that myself. My main interest/social outlet is playing music - but for 5-6 years I lived in a small town where I couldn't get a band together for the life of me, and became very down about it cos I didnt know how else to meet people. I won't lie to you and say I got off my ass and remedied the situation - circumstances forced me back into city life where it got sorted naturally. If I'd stayed there I'd still be in the same boat, so I feel a bit of a phoney saying this to you, but IMHO you should take some kind of action to get out and meet some people. I wish you well


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## Delineator (Jun 24, 2010)

JenFromOC said:


> Find someone that thinks you're hot and make them tell you so about 30 times a day.



The problem is, when a BHM is continuously complimented, yet no one wants to hook-up with him, he tends to reasonably and justifiably conclude(unless he is iredeemably obtuse), that said compliments are not genuine.

Actions speak louder than words(claims are trivial, justifications are *not*).


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## Gyrene (Jun 24, 2010)

Delineator said:


> The problem is, when a BHM is continuously complimented, yet no one wants to hook-up with him, he tends to reasonably and justifiably conclude(unless he is iredeemably obtuse), that said compliments are not genuine.



I concur with this assessment


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## KittyKitten (Jun 24, 2010)

Know that God doesn't make any mistakes and that you are just as worthy and good as anyone else. Out of millions of sperm, you were made, you swum the fastest....


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## extra_fat_guy (Jun 24, 2010)

happyface83 said:


> Know that God doesn't make any mistakes and that you are just as worthy and good as anyone else. Out of millions of sperm, you were made, you swum the fastest....



I like how you put that. I would give you rep, but I have to spread it around first.


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## TraciJo67 (Jun 24, 2010)

escapist said:


> Don't remember our discussion on this a while back?
> 
> ...besides doing sales, IT is the only field I know were you can make 100k a year with no official education in the corporate world.


 
My husband was a database administrator for 14+ years, in the largest metropolitan city in Minnesota, for a well-known national insurance company (at their corporate headquarters), until a promotion a few years ago. And he has an MBA. He didn't earn $100K. Most of our friends are employed as IT professionals, and for those earning 6 figures, it took them 10+ years to get to that point. I don't know of a company that will hire an IT professional without a college degree as an absolute prerequisite, unless its manning the helpdesk or working on the mainframe. And the entry-level salary for that kind of a job is a lot less than half of what you've quoted.


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## Delineator (Jun 24, 2010)

Sasquatch! said:


> Not that I really lack self-esteem, being a pompous and egotistical git--but I keep noticing people on here mentioning low self-esteem.
> 
> So how exactly does one "cure" this?




How do you cure a classic red-herring?

Confidence describes a justified expectation with some basis in historical precedence.

Thus, the notion that expectations follow from outcomes is necessarily post-hoc.

So, in a context of mate choice(which I think is a justifiable assumption to make in this thread)the question then becomes, what is the *TRUE* reason women tend to reject males, thereafter affecting a (justifiable) expectation of status-quo failure(colloquial 'low confidence/self-esteem')?

Naively stating that women tend to confident males doesn't relate anything useful about the basis of confidence in female choice.

So, to persist in attributing this phenomenon to 'confidence', is to pose a meaningless circular argument.

No offense to your personally, but I am continuously astounded that this rather simple feat of deduction manages to elude so many people.

I think this is because guys have been bred to be credulous rather than critical of where a woman's explanations fail to agree with her actions.

But, I don't actually think guys typically lack confidence in themselves, but rather in female mate choices.

So, even if they see themselves as superior to a rival, experience has shown them that female choices are directionally biased to within a narrow range of variable male fitness traits. 

So, if the preferred guy turns out to be a delinquent, sociopathic asshole(which will often be the case, as these qualities are all strategic optima of short-term mating - which prevails increasingly within the fitness landscape of all economically prosperous populations), then we'll observe a decided penchant for bad-boys.

If the preferred guy instead turns out to be a rare nice guy(which will be prohibitively rare, as this will pose a relative fitness handicap where evolution limits frequencies accordingly), then we'll observe the reverse.


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## Sasquatch! (Jun 24, 2010)

Delineator said:


> How do you cure a classic red-herring?
> 
> Confidence describes a justified expectation with some basis in historical precedence.
> 
> ...



Why thanks for that. My original question was posed regarding self-esteem, not dating. Prevaricate ahead though. Be my guest.


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## Delineator (Jun 24, 2010)

Sasquatch! said:


> Why thanks for that. My original question was posed regarding self-esteem, not dating. Prevaricate ahead though. Be my guest.



Yeah, most of ths post probably belongs in the 'Bastard' thread.

But, if self-esteem issues have no particular basis in dating prospects(which would be rare and unusual, as self-esteem issues are often treated as a euphemism for inferior prospects), then simply substitute the dating context for something more relevant.

The rest of it will hold.


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## GiantGil (Jun 24, 2010)

Delineator said:


> How do you cure a classic red-herring?
> 
> Confidence describes a justified expectation with some basis in historical precedence.
> 
> ...



Yeah, I think it's pretty obvious that life experience will color expectations.

This is not the same as having an inferiority complex(low self esteem, or whatever).

I wish people wouldn't confuse the two.


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## bigjmccoy (Jun 25, 2010)

rellis10 said:


> It's not as simple as 'curing' it. Some people are just crushed by this and it'll always be there. I have always had low self-esteem. I'v been terrified of what others thought of me for a long time and i believe i'm only just getting over that.
> 
> I cant say this works for everyone, but here what i think is helping me.
> 
> ...



You got rep for this, plus if it helps, I think you're cute as hell. So there!


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## MasterShake (Jun 26, 2010)

This seems an appropriate thread for this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RU7w0Z35XEE


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## rellis10 (Jun 27, 2010)

bigjmccoy said:


> You got rep for this, plus if it helps, I think you're cute as hell. So there!



Thanks :blush: And sorry for the late reply.


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## taobear (Jul 2, 2010)

Sasquatch! said:


> Not that I really lack self-esteem, being a pompous and egotistical git--but I keep noticing people on here mentioning low self-esteem.
> 
> So how exactly does one "cure" this?



I never thought about self-esteem before I discovered girls, but by the time I was in high school I felt something was wrong with me. It took a girl to point out that if I lost weight she would go out with me. I was in shock, I'm not a numb skull. But it never occurred to me that being fat was bad. Both my parents were fat and they seemed to be happy. I then started to pay attention to the reaction of others to me. I was crushed. And I still worry about the stigma I receive It colors my whole life now. I get nervous going out any time now. I have trouble getting jobs even. Much less dating. I moved to a small town and had not had a date in ten years. But I'm getting back my devil may care attitude back. Hopefully it will help.


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## escapist (Jul 2, 2010)

taobear said:


> It took a girl to point out that if I lost weight she would go out with me. I was in shock, I'm not a numb skull. But it never occurred to me that being fat was bad.



I'm not going to get into this is bad or good, but when I was a young teen one of my girlfriends said if I'd loose weight she'd "do the deed with me". Only slightly better was "Another said if I trimmed up a bit more she put out more often". Flash forward to just 2 years ago a 20 something told me if I'd loose the weight I'd "Totally be a 10". :doh:

I got a bit peeved about all but the last one, I know she was really just trying to give me a complement in her own I'm a 20's something socialite.

Thank God I'm with an FFA now who has a Muscle Fetish too, she's kind of happy either direction I go on the scale.


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## taobear (Jul 2, 2010)

escapist said:


> I'm not going to get into this is bad or good, but when I was a young teen one of my girlfriends said if I'd loose weight she'd "do the deed with me". Only slightly better was "Another said if I trimmed up a bit more she put out more often". Flash forward to just 2 years ago a 20 something told me if I'd loose the weight I'd "Totally be a 10". :doh:
> 
> I got a bit peeved about all but the last one, I know she was really just trying to give me a complement in her own I'm a 20's something socialite.
> 
> Thank God I'm with an FFA now who has a Muscle Fetish too, she's kind of happy either direction I go on the scale.



I have never felt that being fat or a chubby was bad. I just find the way people treat you wrong. Now in these so called enlightened times we have made it almost a crime to use the "N" word, call someone a wetback or use any derogatory term of race color or creed. But fat people are told they are a lower class of human and treated as such. I'm not sure we can legislate this in anyway look at affirmative action. 
It just seems to be a shame that we as the human race have not progressed out of the pack mentality of dogs. I always thought that we had evolved. 
I truly think that we should all make our choices of mates on a purely personal level, but we are bombarded by mass media choices and brainwashed into pop culture and almost forced by peers to accept it as normal. I'm kind-of proud of my choice to go against the flow. Alternative lifestyle you could call it. I just want to be me. I have always been big when I was younger I tried to fit in. I eat about 1000 calories a day I walk a mile every other day. I do this for my health not my physique. I still weigh in at over 300lbs. Does this make me any less worthy of a mate or love?


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## JenFromOC (Jul 2, 2010)

taobear said:


> I have never felt that being fat or a chubby was bad. I just find the way people treat you wrong. Now in these so called enlightened times we have made it almost a crime to use the "N" word, call someone a wetback or use any derogatory term of race color or creed. But fat people are told they are a lower class of human and treated as such. I'm not sure we can legislate this in anyway look at affirmative action.
> It just seems to be a shame that we as the human race have not progressed out of the pack mentality of dogs. I always thought that we had evolved.
> I truly think that we should all make our choices of mates on a purely personal level, but we are bombarded by mass media choices and brainwashed into pop culture and almost forced by peers to accept it as normal. I'm kind-of proud of my choice to go against the flow. Alternative lifestyle you could call it. I just want to be me. I have always been big when I was younger I tried to fit in. I eat about 1000 calories a day I walk a mile every other day. I do this for my health not my physique. I still weigh in at over 300lbs. Does this make me any less worthy of a mate or love?



No, you're not any less worthy or a mate or love....but you should definitely be eating more than 1,000 calories a day. Even I have to eat more than that...


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## taobear (Jul 2, 2010)

JenFromOC said:


> No, you're not any less worthy or a mate or love....but you should definitely be eating more than 1,000 calories a day. Even I have to eat more than that...



I know but if I eat much more than that I have to buy more clothes. LOL I have not actually counted the calories but I eat only once a day and that is not a huge meal I have a very slow metabolism


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## bigpulve (Jul 2, 2010)

taobear said:


> I have never felt that being fat or a chubby was bad. I just find the way people treat you wrong. Now in these so called enlightened times we have made it almost a crime to use the "N" word, call someone a wetback or use any derogatory term of race color or creed. But fat people are told they are a lower class of human and treated as such. I'm not sure we can legislate this in anyway look at affirmative action.
> It just seems to be a shame that we as the human race have not progressed out of the pack mentality of dogs. I always thought that we had evolved.
> I truly think that we should all make our choices of mates on a purely personal level, but we are bombarded by mass media choices and brainwashed into pop culture and almost forced by peers to accept it as normal. I'm kind-of proud of my choice to go against the flow. Alternative lifestyle you could call it. I just want to be me. I have always been big when I was younger I tried to fit in. I eat about 1000 calories a day I walk a mile every other day. I do this for my health not my physique. I still weigh in at over 300lbs. Does this make me any less worthy of a mate or love?


Now I know Im not "supposed" to be advising weight loss blah blah... But man if you are trying to lose weight, eating that few of calories is the wrong way to go. The bodies natural defense mechanism from dying of to few calories is starvation mode. In that mode the body will use up your muscles if they are deemed unnecessary because they use more calories to function, thus you lose points on your metabolism. Second thing it does is it will lower your basal metabolism to just barely functioning levels. third it will store most of the calories you do take in. So your body will probably be storing 700 of those calories directly as fat.

So the adage eat less calories has a limit and if you get to below 1200 you are doing the opposite of your intended goal. so if you really want to lose weight tack on another 500-700 calories a day, and I bet you that you will after a few weeks start losing weight. 

*Im not promoting weight loss, just information for people who want it for themselves.


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## taobear (Jul 2, 2010)

bigpulve said:


> Now I know Im not "supposed" to be advising weight loss blah blah... But man if you are trying to lose weight, eating that few of calories is the wrong way to go. The bodies natural defense mechanism from dying of to few calories is starvation mode. In that mode the body will use up your muscles if they are deemed unnecessary because they use more calories to function, thus you lose points on your metabolism. Second thing it does is it will lower your basal metabolism to just barely functioning levels. third it will store most of the calories you do take in. So your body will probably be storing 700 of those calories directly as fat.
> 
> So the adage eat less calories has a limit and if you get to below 1200 you are doing the opposite of your intended goal. so if you really want to lose weight tack on another 500-700 calories a day, and I bet you that you will after a few weeks start losing weight.
> 
> *Im not promoting weight loss, just information for people who want it for themselves.



I am not trying to lose weight I'm just trying to keep on an even keel and not blow up like a balloon


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## TheMildlyStrangeone (Jul 2, 2010)

taobear said:


> I am not trying to lose weight I'm just trying to keep on an even keel and not blow up like a balloon



if you were trying to maintain you theoretically could eat almost 3000 calories and maintain your weight. At your size, and moderate physical activity, you are going to go into Ketosis rather quickly and will have a bad upswing in weight gain down the road. If you are truly eating only 1000 a day AND walking a mile, without losing large amounts of weight, then something must be metabolically wrong. I would seriously consider seeing a doctor if this is the case. Otherwise, eat lots of lean proteins (chicken, fish, turkey, etc) and good veggies and you should be maintaining your weight very well.


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## bigpulve (Jul 2, 2010)

taobear said:


> I am not trying to lose weight I'm just trying to keep on an even keel and not blow up like a balloon


The point still applies. to maintain my weight I can eat about 2500-2800 a day with my exercise level. Now I jog 2-3 miles a day and lift heavy weight. You could probably eat about 2000 and maintain just fine.


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## taobear (Jul 3, 2010)

TheMildlyStrangeone said:


> if you were trying to maintain you theoretically could eat almost 3000 calories and maintain your weight. At your size, and moderate physical activity, you are going to go into Ketosis rather quickly and will have a bad upswing in weight gain down the road. If you are truly eating only 1000 a day AND walking a mile, without losing large amounts of weight, then something must be metabolically wrong. I would seriously consider seeing a doctor if this is the case. Otherwise, eat lots of lean proteins (chicken, fish, turkey, etc) and good veggies and you should be maintaining your weight very well.



Okay I'll start eating twice a day or more. I just don't get that hungry. I went to a Dr in my teens he gave me speed. I didn't feel a thing accept I lost a lot of sleep.


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## chicken legs (Jul 3, 2010)

I heard mini-meals are the best for losing weight and boosting the metabolism. I want to try it myself but I'm not that organized..lol.


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## escapist (Jul 4, 2010)

When I lost the most weight I was eating about 5-6x a day. I was very sick of eating but had to do it to maintain my metabolic burn & calorie requirements because of the amount of working out I was doing. Also I'm talking about like maybe a tuna sandwich and an apple as a meal. Doing 20 minutes of circuit training 3x a week and walking for 45 minutes every other day I lost about 20 lbs a month and got up to doing 200 push-ups a day in just 2 months.

I know not everybody is built the same, but I really have to agree with _TheMildlyStrangeone_ see a Doctor or something cause eating 1-2x a day just isn't good for you. It puts your body into starvation mode.


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## Delineator (Jul 4, 2010)

taobear said:


> I know but if I eat much more than that I have to buy more clothes. LOL I have not actually counted the calories but I eat only once a day and that is not a huge meal I have a very slow metabolism



Eating small, frequent(every 3 hours) meals is one way to boost your metabolism.

Adding muscle mass is another way to boost your resting metabolic rate.

And *all* endomorphs are carbohydrate sensetive - so you would want to cut out all refined sugars(any highly refined/processed carbohydrate like white bread/pasta, processed cereal products, etc).

You'd further want to limit starchy carbs(potatos, etc), and fructose(fruit, etc).

In fact, the only carbs you would ideally be eating would be the fibrous kind(most vegetables, especially green).

Bio-determinstic factors in endomorphy are adaptive(for example, endomorphs tend to have significantly greater intestinal tissue) only under a narrow set of conditions(ie. famine).

Also, men tend to prefer a surplus of fat stores on the female physique, but sadly, this bias does not hold for female preferences with respect to male physiques.


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## Hozay J Garseeya (Jul 5, 2010)

Delineator said:


> Eating small, frequent(every 3 hours) meals is one way to boost your metabolism.
> 
> Adding muscle mass is another way to boost your resting metabolic rate.
> 
> ...



I don't see how the last part of your post could make sense. Just look at where you're making the statement. The existence of this whole forum makes that statement null and void.


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## Hozay J Garseeya (Jul 5, 2010)

I know the original subject of the thread was improving one's self esteem. We can go on, and it is important about how you feel on the inside. Personally I feel it's also important on the outside.

When I was younger I used to get bummed about not having an aesthetically pleasing image of myself. So I started making small changed to my wardrobe. 

The one thing that I've always like the most has been socks. 

I know it's a small thing when looked at your overall getup every day. 

Since I work in an office, I started to notice that everyone either has blue, black, or maybe grey socks with the slacks they are wearing that day. Well I decided to not be so boring, and I always wear socks that match my tie, or shirt or match something, as long as they aren't just dark blue, black, or grey. Although I am partial to charcoal colored socks. 

People tend to notice socks when you're sitting down and your pants rides up just a little bit, i always get some sort of comment. It's a small change, but it always helps me feel like I look good. 







This is a very small sample of the socks that I own.

My favorite ones are the orange ones on the left. They're cashmere and oh so comfortable.


----------



## CastingPearls (Jul 5, 2010)

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> I know the original subject of the thread was improving one's self esteem. We can go on, and it is important about how you feel on the inside. Personally I feel it's also important on the outside.
> 
> When I was younger I used to get bummed about not having an aesthetically pleasing image of myself. So I started making small changed to my wardrobe.
> 
> ...


I like the gray ones with the red/orange stripes. Possibly because it's got sock-monkey potential.


----------



## Hozay J Garseeya (Jul 5, 2010)

CastingPearls said:


> I like the gray ones with the red/orange stripes. Possibly because it's got sock-monkey potential.



hahaha, don't you sock monkey my socks. they make me look "hawt!"


----------



## CastingPearls (Jul 5, 2010)

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> hahaha, don't you sock monkey my socks. they make me look "hawt!"


I have a sock monkey hanging from my rear-view mirror and I always feel a twinge of guilt about where its mate might be. Possibly on your bed. Sad.


----------



## JenFromOC (Jul 5, 2010)

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> hahaha, don't you sock monkey my socks. they make me look "hawt!"



Peyton needs a step-daddy (I'm just kidding)....and she loves her sock monkey LOL

Introducing....the spawn of Jen haha





Uploaded with ImageShack.us


----------



## CastingPearls (Jul 5, 2010)

JenFromOC said:


> Peyton needs a step-daddy (I'm just kidding)....and she loves her sock monkey LOL
> 
> Introducing....the spawn of Jen haha
> 
> ...


Beautiful!.........


----------



## LovesBigMen (Jul 5, 2010)

JenFromOC said:


> Peyton needs a step-daddy (I'm just kidding)....and she loves her sock monkey LOL
> 
> Introducing....the spawn of Jen haha
> 
> ...



Aww she's adorable *pinch cheek* my dads family would always be pinchingmy cheeks I hated it haha.


----------



## chicken legs (Jul 5, 2010)

JenFromOC said:


> Introducing....the spawn of Jen haha



doh x gazillion = serious baby talkin' for the cutness..lol


----------



## veil (Jul 5, 2010)

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> I know the original subject of the thread was improving one's self esteem. We can go on, and it is important about how you feel on the inside. Personally I feel it's also important on the outside.
> 
> When I was younger I used to get bummed about not having an aesthetically pleasing image of myself. So I started making small changed to my wardrobe.
> 
> ...



that is adorable & so true, sometimes tiny little details can make a big difference.


----------



## rellis10 (Jul 5, 2010)

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> This is a very small sample of the socks that I own.
> 
> My favorite ones are the orange ones on the left. They're cashmere and oh so comfortable.



Dammit now i have a compulsion to buy colourful socks!


----------



## escapist (Jul 5, 2010)

rellis10 said:


> Dammit now i have a compulsion to buy colourful socks!


----------



## fatkid420 (Jul 5, 2010)

im not sure this is appropriate or not but it is my personal experience

my life totally changed when i started going to raves and using ecstasy. after experiencing the effects of the drug it just made it easier to communicate with people. when i was high i didnt feel anything but happiness and bliss, i wanted to talk to everyone i could. once i stopped using, the social skills i had learned under the influence increased my self esteem. 

i learned that me not taking the first risk of approaching people never allowed me to have the positive or negative experience which would come out of the contact.

(this is in no way advocating the use of drugs)


----------



## Zowie (Jul 5, 2010)

fatkid420 said:


> im not sure this is appropriate or not but it is my personal experience
> 
> my life totally changed when i started going to raves and using ecstasy. after experiencing the effects of the drug it just made it easier to communicate with people. when i was high i didnt feel anything but happiness and bliss, i wanted to talk to everyone i could. once i stopped using, the social skills i had learned under the influence increased my self esteem.
> 
> ...



Yeah... I mean, maybe it worked for you, but read like this it just comes across as weird.


----------



## fatkid420 (Jul 5, 2010)

bionic_eggplant said:


> Yeah... I mean, maybe it worked for you, but read like this it just comes across as weird.



its hard for it to make sence to those who have not experienced it. it just very much cures social anxiety.

i guess what im really trying to say

risk is essientle, there is no growth of insperation in staying within what is safe and comfertable.


----------



## Zowie (Jul 5, 2010)

fatkid420 said:


> its hard for it to make sence to those who have not experienced it. it just very much cures social anxiety.
> 
> i guess what im really trying to say
> 
> risk is essientle, there is no growth of insperation in staying within what is safe and comfertable.



Yes, but the fact that you said drugs were involved makes it seem fishy. You could have left that part out, and just said that "trying new things" may improve someone's esteem.
Anyway, it doesn't matter, I was commenting that it sounded a little funny to me.


----------



## TheMildlyStrangeone (Jul 6, 2010)

fatkid420 said:


> im not sure this is appropriate or not but it is my personal experience
> 
> my life totally changed when i started going to raves and using ecstasy. after experiencing the effects of the drug it just made it easier to communicate with people. when i was high i didnt feel anything but happiness and bliss, i wanted to talk to everyone i could. once i stopped using, the social skills i had learned under the influence increased my self esteem.
> 
> ...




Not even going to touch this with a ten foot pole :doh:


----------



## WillSpark (Jul 6, 2010)

"My life and self-esteem totally changed by taking a substance that lowered my inhibitions artificially."

Truly a great lesson for one and all.


----------



## Paquito (Jul 6, 2010)

WillSpark said:


> "My life and self-esteem totally changed by taking a substance that lowered my inhibitions artificially."
> 
> Truly a great lesson for one and all.



Are you determined to have the last post in every thread on the front page of this board?


----------



## CastingPearls (Jul 6, 2010)

Wait. Is this a pissing contest? Should I grab some popcorn and an Icee before you guys really start going at it---Paquito, really...it's such a waste of glitter...


----------



## WillSpark (Jul 6, 2010)

Paquito said:


> Are you determined to have the last post in every thread on the front page of this board?



Yes. Plus I just got here and am responding to each new one that I want to respond to as I read it.


----------



## TheMildlyStrangeone (Jul 6, 2010)

WillSpark said:


> "My life and self-esteem totally changed by taking a substance that lowered my inhibitions artificially."
> 
> Truly a great lesson for one and all.



actually, there might be some correlation between his ingesting of MDMA and lower social anxiety. I would not, however, suggest this as a good method of becoming more social.


----------



## Paquito (Jul 6, 2010)

CastingPearls said:


> Wait. Is this a pissing contest? Should I grab some popcorn and an Icee before you guys really start going at it---Paquito, really...it's such a waste of glitter...



Nah, I was just making an observation. I've used up my confrontation on fake trolls and complete assholes. I'm good. :happy:

Besides, he assisted in one of my super awesome quotable sayings. And as fellow doodle animals, we must band together.


----------



## CastingPearls (Jul 6, 2010)

TheMildlyStrangeone said:


> actually, there might be some correlation between his ingesting of MDMA and lower social anxiety. I would not, however, suggest this as a good method of becoming more social.


E is also known to turn your brain into Swiss cheese. Not the best recommendation as a social aid, no.


----------



## Paquito (Jul 6, 2010)

*scratch scratch* Hey man, you got some self-esteem?!?! I need a fucking fix man, I NEED IT

*scratch*


----------



## TheMildlyStrangeone (Jul 6, 2010)

CastingPearls said:


> E is also known to turn your brain into Swiss cheese. Not the best recommendation as a social aid, no.



That's a myth.


http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/19273493


How could MDMA (ecstasy) help anxiety disorders? A neurobiological rationale.



and before anyone chews me out, I have never taken MDMA aka Molly aka E, etc.


----------



## CastingPearls (Jul 6, 2010)

Paquito said:


> Nah, I was just making an observation. I've used up my confrontation on fake trolls and complete assholes. I'm good. :happy:
> 
> Besides, he assisted in one of my super awesome quotable sayings. And as fellow doodle animals, we must band together.


I am one of you (Honorary Recipient of a Bionic Eggplant Doodle) ...I just got a little worried cos my glitter goggles are in the shop and I wouldn't want to miss anything. (Not to mention my Movie-Butter microwave popcorn box was left EMPTY in the pantry)


----------



## WillSpark (Jul 6, 2010)

Come on Paco, put on you jammies and we will have a pillow fight......TO THE DEATH


----------



## Paquito (Jul 6, 2010)

CastingPearls said:


> I am one of you (Honorary Recipient of a Bionic Eggplant Doodle) ...I just got a little worried cos my glitter goggles are in the shop and I wouldn't want to miss anything. *(Not to mention my Movie-Butter microwave popcorn box was left EMPTY in the pantry)*



I weep for my country. And for my snack goods.

Then again, I'm totally trippin balls on some self-esteem, so who gives a fuck amirite?

*techno music* *hypnotic thumping*


----------



## Paquito (Jul 6, 2010)

WillSpark said:


> Come on Paco, put on you jammies and we will have a pillow fight......TO THE DEATH



*Stuffs my pillowcase full of spikes and AIDS*

Bring it, motherfucker.


----------



## CastingPearls (Jul 6, 2010)

TheMildlyStrangeone said:


> That's a myth.
> 
> 
> http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/19273493
> ...


Not so fast.

http://www.nida.nih.gov/infofacts/ecstasy.html


----------



## TheMildlyStrangeone (Jul 6, 2010)

CastingPearls said:


> Not so fast.
> 
> http://www.nida.nih.gov/infofacts/ecstasy.html



Research in animals indicates that MDMA can be harmful to the brain—one study in nonhuman primates showed that exposure to MDMA for only 4 days caused damage to serotonin nerve terminals that was still evident 6 to 7 years later.1* Although similar neurotoxicity has not been shown definitively in humans,* the wealth of animal research indicating MDMA’s damaging properties strongly suggests that MDMA is not a safe drug for human consumption. This is currently an area of active research.s,



http://www.maps.org/media/mtvclarify.html

Clarification of Information Presented on MTV's Special on Ecstasy, 11/28/2000
by Rick Doblin, Ph.D.

The recent MTV special on MDMA showed the results of a SPECT scan of a young woman, Lynn Smith, who had used a very large amount of MDMA. Lynn's doctors reported that her SPECT scan showed "holes in the brain" similar to what a scan would look like of an elderly woman who had had multiple small strokes.

The graphic image shown on the MTV special was a 3-D reconstruction of the SPECT image, which clearly showed dramatic and frightening holes throughouther brain. However, this image was in no way a visual representation of thestructure of her brain The SPECT scan actually measured the variation in cerebral blood flow in Lynn's brain. The 3D image was then created by assigning a different color to different amounts of blood flow. How the graphic image looks is a matter of threshold effect on the image processing.

One can take any normal brain SPECT and lower the threshold (lower areas of blood flow assigned a low or zero level of color) , and one will see "holes" on the 3-D image. Conversely, you can also take the same image and adjust (increase) the threshold to "remove the holes". These are not absolute blood flow measurements. The "holes" simply demonstrate relatively lower blood flow compared to the entire brain. One cannot make any statements about whether it's normal or abnormal unless absolute blood flow measurements are made, which requires more sophisticated scanning procedures than were conducted on Lynn Smith.

Dr. Linda Chang, Harbor-UCLA Medical Center, has conducted a scientifically rigorous, controlled SPECT study in 21 MDMA users compared to 21 controls. (Chang, L. et al, Effect of Ecstasy ( 3,4-methylenedioxymethamphetamine [MDMA]) on cerebral blood flow: a co-registered SPECT and MRI study. Psychiatry Research-Neuroimaging, Section 98 (2000) 15-28.)

The MDMA users in Dr. Chang's study averaged 211 exposures to MDMA, with a range of from 6-1500 exposures. The average amount of MDMA consumed was 13.1grams. There were no significant differences in amount of cerebral blood flow between the MDMA users and the controls, either globally or in specific brain regions. Furthermore, none of the MDMA users showed any signs of stroke, as measured by MRI scans.

In Dr. Chang's study, 10 of the subjects were scanned again, after the administration of two doses of MDMA. Cerebral blood flow was reduced somewhat in some brain regions at two weeks after the last dose of MDMA. 2 subjects were scanned again after 10 weeks and were found to have elevated cerebral blood flow in some regions. Dr. Chang reported, "Our findings suggest that the initially decreased rCBF normalizes with time and may even increase above baseline at later time points."

In order to diagnose a stroke, or strokes, one can simply do an MRI and even lesions as small as 1-2 millimeter will be visible. MAPS has offered to pay for the costs of an MRI scan on Lynn. Even if there is evidence of stroke, which is highly unlikely, it would be possible to say whether this was from MDMA or from other drugs that Lynn had taken. Cocaine or methamphetamine both can cause strokes in some individuals.

* No drug is completely safe and MDMA is no exception to this rule. However, the claim that MDMA causes "holes in the brain" is not backed up by scientific research. Such claims are irresponsible and serve to further reduce the credibility of anti-MDMA warnings.* If MAPS arranges for Lynn to receive an MRI scan and/or another SPECT scan, MAPS will report accurately and honestly what the results show.


----------



## Paquito (Jul 6, 2010)

Is the ecstasy fight more entertaining than our pillow fight? 

Let's just combine them, fix it, split the profits, and head to Canada.


----------



## WillSpark (Jul 6, 2010)

Paquito said:


> *Stuffs my pillowcase full of spikes and AIDS*
> 
> Bring it, motherfucker.



Dude. I'm not willing to fight you while you're slammed with self-esteem. That stuff gives you super-strength. 

*drops pillow, walks far away to bunker, and detonates pillow*


----------



## Paquito (Jul 6, 2010)

This has to be as hot as we imagine girl pillow fights to be.


----------



## CastingPearls (Jul 6, 2010)

TheMildlyStrangeone said:


> Research in animals indicates that MDMA can be harmful to the brain—one study in nonhuman primates showed that exposure to MDMA for only 4 days caused damage to serotonin nerve terminals that was still evident 6 to 7 years later.1* Although similar neurotoxicity has not been shown definitively in humans,* the wealth of animal research indicating MDMA’s damaging properties strongly suggests that MDMA is not a safe drug for human consumption. This is currently an area of active research.s,
> 
> 
> 
> ...


You failed to bold the 'still evident 6 - 7 years later' and 'this is currently an area of active research' indicating that WHEN (not if) enough research is evident to disprove your argument, there will be more than enough ravers drooling and wearing Depends to prove it's not a myth.

Paquito, pillowfights are always much more fun. Feathers or that fake polyfil?


----------



## WillSpark (Jul 6, 2010)

Paquito said:


> This has to be as hot as we imagine girl pillow fights to be.



I don't think you want me in my lingerie for this. You'll be too hypnotized.


----------



## Paquito (Jul 6, 2010)

WillSpark said:


> I don't think you want me in my lingerie for this. You'll be too hypnotized.



...were we not supposed to be in lingerie? I never get the memo...


----------



## CastingPearls (Jul 6, 2010)

I love you guys.


----------



## TheMildlyStrangeone (Jul 6, 2010)

CastingPearls said:


> You failed to bold the 'still evident 6 - 7 years later' and 'this is currently an area of active research' indicating that WHEN (not if) enough research is evident to disprove your argument, there will be more than enough ravers drooling and wearing Depends to prove it's not a myth.
> 
> Paquito, pillowfights are always much more fun. Feathers or that fake polyfil?



Did you read the other article where the "hole in the brain" myth originated? Any long terms use of psychoactive drugs, where legal or illicit will result in some instance of permanent bodily change. The point is, that the "holes in your brain" thing is entirely part of a anti-drug propaganda machine also brought you "Reefer Madness" (an extremely racist campaign at that) "Crack Babies" (another myth) and the countless other Puritanical movements against drugs. Meanwhile, most of the top 20 abused drugs are legal to obtain with a prescription...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Urban_legends_about_illegal_drugs#Holes_in_the_brain


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## WillSpark (Jul 6, 2010)

Paquito said:


> ...we're we not supposed to be in lingerie? I never get the memo...



"We are we" hoo-what?


----------



## Paquito (Jul 6, 2010)

TheMildlyStrangeone said:


> Did you read the other article where the "hole in the brain" myth originated? Any long terms use of psychoactive drugs, where legal or illicit will result in some instance of permanent bodily change. The point is, that the "holes in your brain" thing is entirely part of a anti-drug propaganda machine also brought you "Reefer Madness" (an extremely racist campaign at that) "Crack Babies" (another myth) and the countless other Puritanical movements against drugs. Meanwhile, most of the top 20 abused drugs are legal to obtain with a prescription...



Dude, grab a fucking pillow, put on a nightie, and shut up.


----------



## Paquito (Jul 6, 2010)

WillSpark said:


> "We are we" who what?



I'm kinda Grammar Nazi, so I can't hate on you for that.

*shoots out kneecaps*


----------



## TheMildlyStrangeone (Jul 6, 2010)

Paquito said:


> Dude, grab a fucking pillow, put on a nightie, and shut up.



sorry, shall we break for more childish talk?


----------



## Paquito (Jul 6, 2010)

TheMildlyStrangeone said:


> sorry, shall we break for more childish talk?



I'm sorry, but if you really want to get into the details of drugs, wouldn't Hyde Park be more appropriate? Certainly me being in lingerie would have more to do with self esteem than this. It takes some self-esteem to rock the shit outta this look.


----------



## WillSpark (Jul 6, 2010)

Paquito said:


> I'm kinda Grammar Nazi, so I can't hate on you for that.
> 
> *shoots out kneecaps*


My kneecaps are bionic, bitch!

*busts out the flamethrower*

Also, drugs are, mostly, bad.
(just so that I can stay mostly on track with the current other conversation, which is still completely unrelated to the actual topic even though it stemmed from something that was sort of relevant initially)

And speaking of bionic, I can't help but think a cartoony graphic novel of this exchange would be amazing!


----------



## Paquito (Jul 6, 2010)

WillSpark said:


> My kneecaps are bionic, bitch!
> 
> *busts out the flamethrower*
> 
> ...



AND?!?!?! What is this, and?


----------



## TheMildlyStrangeone (Jul 6, 2010)

Paquito said:


> I'm sorry, but if you really want to get into the details of drugs, wouldn't Hyde Park be more appropriate? Certainly me being in lingerie would have more to do with self esteem than this. It takes some self-esteem to rock the shit outta this look.



No, the topic at hand is self-esteem. Another user suggested that people should take MDMA because it helped him become much more sociable. While I don't necessarily agree with the sentiment, I do understand there is something to be gained from the MDMA experience. CastingPearls posted about the 'holes in the brain' thing and that's what got me started. Hearing things like that sort of gets my gears going because it's misinformation perpetuated that causes certain actions that are unfairly limiting and discriminatory. If I wanted to talk in Hyde Park, I would. I like being amongst the FFA/BHM community. I'm sorry to cut into your cutesy back and forth. 

and I think this thread would speak largely to our little aside in this thread.


http://www.dimensionsmagazine.com/forums/showthread.php?t=73697


----------



## Hozay J Garseeya (Jul 6, 2010)

has anybody tried socks?

*looking for a onesie to pillow fight in*


----------



## Paquito (Jul 6, 2010)

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> has anybody tried socks?
> 
> *looking for a onesie to pillow fight in*



Socks for self-esteem, sock fights, or "socks in the brain?"

Way to contribute to the totally unrelated cuteness. Sir, this is a super cereal discussion on drugs that happens to have a title about self-esteem. You ought to be ashamed.

*hits you over the head with a pillow*


----------



## WillSpark (Jul 6, 2010)

Paquito said:


> Socks for self-esteem, sock fights, or "socks in the brain?"
> 
> Way to contribute to the totally unrelated cuteness. Sir, this is a super cereal discussion on drugs that happens to have a title about self-esteem. You ought to be ashamed.
> 
> *hits you over the head with a pillow*



Speaking of which, why is your pillow wearing a thong?



Paquito said:


> AND?!?!?! What is this, and?



There is no such 'and'. Anymore.....


----------



## Paquito (Jul 6, 2010)

The holes in my brain cause me to mess up some times. So if the thong is on the pillow, then the pillow case is on...me. Damnit, there goes the sex appeal.

And don't even try to be sneaky, I got you quoted. Or else I would've changed my mistake.


----------



## WillSpark (Jul 6, 2010)

If you'd have quoted me you would have seen I wasn't being nearly that sneaky. You give me too much credit. However, keep the pillowcase on. The pink frills suit you.


----------



## Paquito (Jul 6, 2010)

WillSpark said:


> If you'd have quoted me you would have seen I wasn't being nearly that sneaky. You give me too much credit. However, keep the pillowcase on. The pink frills suit you.



I always wear pink frills.

_Always._
_Pink Frills._
_Always._
_Frills._
_Pink._
_I._


----------



## CastingPearls (Jul 6, 2010)

Amusing how my argument (don't take an iffy at best illegal substance) is so much more damaging than actually taking it. 

And talking down to people who have just as much right to post in this thread as you or I, did that make you feel more superior?

Well guys, it's been real but one of those legally abused drugs has finally kicked in and I'm going to get some much needed sleep. 

Let me know who wins the pillow fight tomorrow. I want all the details on whose lingerie was prettier. 

Sweet dreams!!!


----------



## WillSpark (Jul 6, 2010)

I think my sexy red and black teddy beats your pink frilly pillowcase. And even if your pillow has AIDS and a thong, mine has Chuck Norris on it.

(this happens to be getting more and more rediculous the further this goes along. I hope bionic is taking notes as she reads this)


----------



## Hozay J Garseeya (Jul 6, 2010)

Zoe's asleep, but I'll keep her posted. 

My pillow case is depressing. The thong on it is just a plain red thong, no aids, no chuck Norris . . . I suck.


----------



## CastingPearls (Jul 6, 2010)

WillSpark said:


> I think my sexy red and black teddy beats your pink frilly pillowcase. And even if your pillow has AIDS and a thong, mine has Chuck Norris on it.
> 
> (this happens to be getting more and more rediculous the further this goes along. I hope bionic is taking notes as she reads this)


I hope she's doodling furiously! GOOD NIGHT!!


----------



## WillSpark (Jul 6, 2010)

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> Zoe's asleep, but I'll keep her posted.
> 
> My pillow case is depressing. The thong on it is just a plain red thong, no aids, no chuck Norris . . . I suck.



But does it have a mexican flag on it? Cuz that would make up for some of its other inadequacies by just being stereotypical.


----------



## WillSpark (Jul 6, 2010)

CastingPearls said:


> I hope she's doodling furiously! GOOD NIGHT!!



And a good night to you, Ms. Pearls.


----------



## chicken legs (Jul 6, 2010)




----------



## WillSpark (Jul 6, 2010)

chicken legs said:


>



Hey hey hey! We fight with pillows, not magnets!

.....I call red one.


----------



## Hozay J Garseeya (Jul 6, 2010)

WillSpark said:


> But does it have a mexican flag on it? Cuz that would make up for some of its other inadequacies by just being stereotypical.



well . . . KIND of. It's got this on it.


----------



## chicken legs (Jul 6, 2010)

I got some money on blue his....magnet...looks bigger.


----------



## WillSpark (Jul 6, 2010)

chicken legs said:


> I got some money on blue his....magnet...looks bigger.



You can trust that's just the camera angle.


----------



## Delineator (Jul 6, 2010)

chicken legs said:


> I got some money on blue his....magnet...looks bigger.



Optical illusion.


----------



## escapist (Jul 6, 2010)

Delineator said:


> Optical illusion.



I'm with Delineator on this one.


----------



## Zowie (Jul 6, 2010)

Hahahaha, what a fantastic way to start my morning. You guys are the best. 

I honestly think Will had the better chance at winning.


----------



## djudex (Jul 6, 2010)




----------



## Paquito (Jul 6, 2010)

Thanks for the vote of confidence. 

I literally didn't want to go to bed last night, didn't want to miss anything. But damn the white man for making me get up early.


----------



## Zowie (Jul 6, 2010)

Paquito said:


> Thanks for the vote of confidence.
> 
> I literally didn't want to go to bed last night, didn't want to miss anything. But damn the white man for making me get up early.




It's very frustrating to wake up and read 12 pages of hilarious text that I could have easily participated in. 
Soon, soon, I'll be in a better time zone.


----------



## veil (Jul 6, 2010)

TheMildlyStrangeone said:


> That's a myth.
> 
> 
> http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/19273493
> ...



i had recently read a study on therapeutic use of MDMA, and another on LSD being used for addiction recovery, and went to search for these articles and just found a site claiming LSD is addictive. oh lord.


----------



## WillSpark (Jul 6, 2010)

djudex said:


>



Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagaan. You don't even know how much more amazing that wolf just became, and he's already Chuck Norris's favorite pet.

And thanks for that bio, but more importantly, DID YOU TAKE NOTES?


----------



## Kazak (Jul 6, 2010)

JenFromOC said:


> Find someone that thinks you're hot and make them tell you so about 30 times a day.




Ok, so tell me.
... Oh, wait, I read that backwards. You said to find some that thinks I'M hot. And here I was trying to get someone I think is hot to tell me something. N/M


----------



## stldpn (Jul 6, 2010)

TheMildlyStrangeone said:


> * No drug is completely safe and MDMA is no exception to this rule. However, the claim that MDMA causes "holes in the brain" is not backed up by scientific research. Such claims are irresponsible and serve to further reduce the credibility of anti-MDMA warnings.* If MAPS arranges for Lynn to receive an MRI scan and/or another SPECT scan, MAPS will report accurately and honestly what the results show.



The real issue for most users is in the way that X is generally made. Most operations use a standard pharmacy pill press. That means that the individual running the press control what goes in the pill. Many pills sold as x don't even contain MDMA, most contain a certain amount, of heroin, coke or meth. If the person running the press is fucked up you might as well be playing russian roulette.


----------



## chicken legs (Jul 7, 2010)

Did I mention I LOOOOVED X.


----------



## fatkid420 (Jul 7, 2010)

TheMildlyStrangeone said:


> actually, there might be some correlation between his ingesting of MDMA and lower social anxiety. I would not, however, suggest this as a good method of becoming more social.



it was prescribed by doctors to patients who suffered social anxiety 


your loss is my gain, life is to short to not take risks, its how one gets ahead in life.


----------



## fatkid420 (Jul 7, 2010)

chicken legs said:


> Did I mention I LOOOOVED X.



how can one not? it makes you feel more happy then you could without it. in essence it is synthetic happiness. side effects may include.... lol


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## veil (Jul 7, 2010)

stldpn said:


> The real issue for most users is in the way that X is generally made. Most operations use a standard pharmacy pill press. That means that the individual running the press control what goes in the pill. Many pills sold as x don't even contain MDMA, most contain a certain amount, of heroin, coke or meth. If the person running the press is fucked up you might as well be playing russian roulette.




THIS is a big issue. i have never done X myself, but i've done some other things and it is so crucial to know where your stuff comes from. i recommend befriending chemists at MIT*, the ones who go to burning man.

*and making any chubby ones have pillow fights--see? i tied it back to the fun stuff!


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## JenFromOC (Jul 8, 2010)

Kazak said:


> Ok, so tell me.
> ... Oh, wait, I read that backwards. You said to find some that thinks I'M hot. And here I was trying to get someone I think is hot to tell me something. N/M



You're hot....x30.


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## Kazak (Jul 12, 2010)

JenFromOC said:


> You're hot....x30.



awwww shucks, you're just sayin that... x30


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## johniav (Jul 15, 2010)

Step 1. look in the mirror and make a silly face. (something very idoitic)
step 2. One up that look with an even more corny stare.( the cornier the better)
Step 3. say to yourself: My face in reality, looks better than the faces I just displayed in the mirror, and moreover any person that doesn't approve of my aproach to life can sniff my dense forest located under my armpits after a day of working in the hot sun.


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## taobear (Jul 15, 2010)

johniav said:


> Step 1. look in the mirror and make a silly face. (something very idoitic)
> step 2. One up that look with an even more corny stare.( the cornier the better)
> Step 3. say to yourself: My face in reality, looks better than the faces I just displayed in the mirror, and moreover any person that doesn't approve of my aproach to life can sniff my dense forest located under my armpits after a day of working in the hot sun.



Okay thats just disgusting.


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## BigChaz (Jul 15, 2010)

johniav said:


> Step 1. look in the mirror and make a silly face. (something very idoitic)
> step 2. One up that look with an even more corny stare.( the cornier the better)
> Step 3. say to yourself: My face in reality, looks better than the faces I just displayed in the mirror, and moreover any person that doesn't approve of my aproach to life can *sniff my dense forest located under my armpits after a day of working in the hot sun.*



I think it is cool how you can work your fetish into your posts so smoothly.


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