# This is what happens when I get to my 1000th post...



## fatlane (Nov 22, 2005)

Turns out, I start a new thread. 


Cool.


Oooh! I also get a coupon for a free Route 44 drink at a participating Sonic restaurant. Nice!



Man, 1000 posts rules. Ahhhhh!


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## Obesus (Nov 22, 2005)

Rock on dude! I understand that at 2,000 posts, you get your own engraved mug with fat Elvis on it! LOL:eat1: 






fatlane said:


> Turns out, I start a new thread.
> 
> 
> Cool.
> ...


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## ThatFatGirl (Nov 22, 2005)

Woohoo! Bring on the dancing fat girls! 

I look forward to the day I pass the 1000 posts milestone - which at my rate of 1.29 posts per day will be in about two and a half years. Ahh.. the excitement mounts!


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## fatlane (Nov 22, 2005)

ONWARDS! TO THE FAT ELVIS MUG!!!

TFG: The trick is in posting to more threads each day. And in how you flex your wrists when you swing. I just point my right pinky in the direction I want the ball to go in and let the club do the rest.


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## AnnMarie (Nov 23, 2005)

Well, I already said congrats, but I must put it, again, in the proper place!!

Yay for you!! You post rule.


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## fatlane (Nov 23, 2005)

I will now eat my Post Toastees. And play the Tommy Bolin song.


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## AnnMarie (Nov 23, 2005)

fatlane said:


> I will now eat my Post Toastees. And play the Tommy Bolin song.



Oh man, is that cereal?? Or are those the flat, round, toaster cake things that come in corn and when you put butter on the top after they're toasted, they get all shiny??? 

I love those things if it's the latter.


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## fatlane (Nov 23, 2005)

The latter it is. I only want you to be happy. And excited. That way, you're more likely to jump up and down in anticipation. Fat women jumping up and down always makes for good television, or good ogling at the very least.


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## AnnMarie (Nov 23, 2005)

fatlane said:


> The latter it is. I only want you to be happy. And excited. That way, you're more likely to jump up and down in anticipation. Fat women jumping up and down always makes for good television, or good ogling at the very least.




Are you lying? It's the cereal isn't it? Because if it is, I might sob, which still causes jiggling and body movement. Although it's probably more difficult to find crying chicks good for ogling.


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## fatlane (Nov 23, 2005)

Which is why I will lie like a Democratic president in front of a grand jury in order to keep you in giggly jiggly smiles.


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## 1300 Class (Nov 23, 2005)

Well congratulations, if I may say so.


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## fatlane (Nov 23, 2005)

Yes. You may indeed say so.

I graciously accept.


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## 1300 Class (Nov 23, 2005)

Well, thats top hole spiffin' stuff then.


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## AnnMarie (Nov 23, 2005)

fatlane said:


> Which is why I will lie like a Democratic president in front of a grand jury in order to keep you in giggly jiggly smiles.



Why not lie like a Republican president on the eve of war? 

If you're going to lie, make it matter.


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## 1300 Class (Nov 23, 2005)

Ohhhh, very topically droll. :nods:


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## fatlane (Nov 23, 2005)

AnnMarie said:


> Why not lie like a Republican president on the eve of war?
> 
> If you're going to lie, make it matter.




Yeah, but Bush isn't gettin' any, if you know what I mean. That twinkle in his eye has _nothing_ to do with "cigars".


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## AnnMarie (Nov 23, 2005)

fatlane said:


> Yeah, but Bush isn't gettin' any, if you know what I mean. That twinkle in his eye has _nothing_ to do with "cigars".



Okay, okay. I can get behind that reasoning.


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## fatlane (Nov 23, 2005)

This is why Democratic presidents are more fun than Republican ones. Not better, just more fun.


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## Tina (Nov 24, 2005)

fatlane said:


> I will now eat my Post Toastees. And play the Tommy Bolin song.



You and one other person are the only people I've ever known who knew of that album, and song. Great album.


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## fatlane (Nov 24, 2005)

_Well my mind has been exploded
About some things that don't seem right
And my gun is cocked and loaded
I hope I get me some sleep tonight..._

I LOVE TOMMY BOLIN'S STUFF! Post Toastee has to be one of the best rock songs ever recorded.


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## paralegalpie (Nov 24, 2005)

fatlane, you have been a busy guy on this board. how long have you been posting here?


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## fatlane (Nov 24, 2005)

Two months? I think...


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## CurvaceousBBWLover (Nov 25, 2005)

1000 posts? That is quite an accomplishment, Fatlane.


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## fatlane (Nov 25, 2005)

... or quite a lot of idling.


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## Webmaster (Nov 26, 2005)

ThatFatGirl said:


> Woohoo! Bring on the dancing fat girls!
> 
> I look forward to the day I pass the 1000 posts milestone - which at my rate of 1.29 posts per day will be in about two and a half years. Ahh.. the excitement mounts!



You need to post more then!  This software makes it easy. One of my hobby boards uses vBulletin and somehow I ended up with over 2,000 posts a year there.


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## fatlane (Nov 26, 2005)

... and since I read fast, touch-type, and check frequently, AND suffer from MTS (massive typing syndrome), I get even MORE posts with this new software. It's... like... I... cant... stop...!


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## bigsexy920 (Nov 26, 2005)

:bow: 

I wish I had more time to read and post.


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## fatlane (Nov 26, 2005)

I move like a ninja, mostly. Read and type like one, too.

I also check the forums when I'm doing creative work. Nice to go back and forth from one medium or project to the board.


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## bigsexy920 (Nov 26, 2005)

AHHH, theres a method to your madness. Now eveyone knows your secret.


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## fatlane (Nov 26, 2005)

Caramba.

I won't kill you all, but I will slip ex-lax in your sodas.

When you least expect it... _EXPECT IT!_


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## Tina (Nov 26, 2005)

FLO, keep in mind that too much ExLax, and the 'activity' it causes may result in weight loss. Just sayin'.


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## fatlane (Nov 26, 2005)

OK. Noted. I'll slip maple syrup into the beverages, instead.


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## Tina (Nov 26, 2005)

There ya go! :eat2:


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## fatlane (Nov 26, 2005)

\/\/007!!!!~~!!!!!


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## fatlane (Dec 1, 2005)

Also turns out, I can smack anyone I choose with rep points equal to my posts divided by 100. Anyone can do that, but when you got over 1000, it's a big deal...


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## Totmacher (Dec 1, 2005)

Whoa, I stand corrected. So you're now the rep point godfather. I wonder if Conrad could have forseen this when he instituted this rule... Can you giveth _and_ taketh away?


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## fatlane (Dec 1, 2005)

Just giveth. And it seems like I'm still limited in how frequently I can give and in waiting before I can strike the same person again.

But when I hit, it's like an atom bomb.


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## Obesus (Dec 1, 2005)

...and I have felt the majesty of his atom-bombage! It was like...holy bajeezus, how did I get all of these rep points???? Then....yes, then I saw the source and all stood naked and revealed in the LIGHT of truth! Or, I figured it had to be Fatlane..one or the other!:bow: 



fatlane said:


> Just giveth. And it seems like I'm still limited in how frequently I can give and in waiting before I can strike the same person again.
> 
> But when I hit, it's like an atom bomb.


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## fatlane (Dec 1, 2005)

I do what I think is right: even if it goes against the law, the government, or even God. I do what I think is right.

(50 monks chant, "Govinda!" repeatedly in my presence.)


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## Jay West Coast (Dec 1, 2005)

fatlane said:


> I do what I think is right: even if it goes against the law, the government, or even God. I do what I think is right.
> 
> (50 monks chant, "Govinda!" repeatedly in my presence.)




 And your coat-tails look awesome from here. :bow: :bow: :bow: 


Humbly Before You,

Jay West Coast


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## Obesus (Dec 1, 2005)

I usually have my High Priestesses chant "Hi-de-hi-de-hi, hi-di-hi-de-ho" right before big pasta stuffin' SM Masonic rituals! (Are we still in the Rumors thread?) I lost my place here for a minute, trying to keep up with the dazzling speed of Fatlane's touch-typing! :bow: 



fatlane said:


> I do what I think is right: even if it goes against the law, the government, or even God. I do what I think is right.
> 
> (50 monks chant, "Govinda!" repeatedly in my presence.)


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## fatlane (Dec 2, 2005)

Man... imagine if I COULD smack somebody down by 1/100th of my posts... new members wouldn't stand a chance as I fling them thunderbolts.

It's a good thing Conrad's kept that capability out of my hands.


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## swamptoad (Dec 2, 2005)

Fatlane just think, you could be this communities mentor.

p.s. I don't know what a mentor might do or the rewards for being a mentor....but I just thought of it.

*smiles*


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## fatlane (Dec 2, 2005)

I could change all the paysite links to point to my site, given sufficent power and an erosion of my general morality... I must resist the urge to do evil.


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## swamptoad (Dec 2, 2005)

mentors do evil?


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## fatlane (Dec 2, 2005)

Didn't you see Star Wars? Darth Sidious == EVIL MENTOR! Hellooooo!


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## swamptoad (Dec 2, 2005)

Oh no...George Lucas created evil mentors *ack*


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## fatlane (Dec 2, 2005)

Good news is, I'm not on a respirator after falling into a volcano.


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## CurvaceousBBWLover (Dec 2, 2005)

It's hard to believe that any reasonable man would stick with an evil mentor who manipulated him into being in that position.


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## Jack Skellington (Dec 2, 2005)

As promised, you have my pity.


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## fatlane (Dec 4, 2005)

This is my post #1500. 12 days after post #1000. Looks like I'll hit #2000 by mid-December.


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## eljay (Dec 4, 2005)

Grats for No 1000 dude  :bow:


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## Obesus (Dec 4, 2005)

Yes, Master...shall I clean the brains today, master? Gooooood....hey, it is all part of being part of Evil Henchman's Union, local 473, outta' Frisco here! 

http://www.sam-hane.com/agency/overlord.htm

Be sure to scroll down to the Evil Henchman's guide...it is very helpful in my day to day work for my evil mentor! Damn...he is still over 1,000 posts ahead of me...what shall I do...yes...the brains...I will wire them together...he will never suspect...yes! :bow: 




CurvaceousBBWLover said:


> It's hard to believe that any reasonable man would stick with an evil mentor who manipulated him into being in that position.


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## fatlane (Dec 4, 2005)

And be sure to dust behind the mind control ray emanator. And clean the gaskets on the clone growing tanks this week.


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## Obesus (Dec 4, 2005)

..or the ones behind the sparking thingy next to the little door on the left...you know, the one with the coffee table next to it and the toffees on it? The table with the black phone on it.....not the brown phone that we moved last week...the black phone!?????? I must remember to degravitize the feeding booths as well and check the *padlocks*...number 6 is reserved for Jes as I recall...muahahahahahah! :shocked: 




fatlane said:


> And be sure to dust behind the mind control ray emanator. And clean the gaskets on the clone growing tanks this week.


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## Obesus (Dec 4, 2005)

...on all five boards and even the events board....I just LOOOOOOVE doing that...it's an OCD thing fer sure!  Usually I do it at three in the morning, but you would be shocked how many night owls post compulsively too! :shocked:


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## fatlane (Dec 4, 2005)

Better hit all the cloning tanks, just in case we get inspected again this week. Only passed by five points last time. Wouldn't do to have our evil overlord license revoked for a few grotty cloning tank gaskets, now would it?

Nice job on the stealth jet. The anti-radar tinsel adds a fitting holiday touch.


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## Obesus (Dec 5, 2005)

As I near my 500th post, I must say, I couldn't have done it without learning from your athletic and nimble fingers...I also learned whole new ways of looking at three posts at once while trying to figure out where the hell you were posting next! The tinsel was actually a recycling job...Soviet Navy Surplus..shredded slightly used foil from kitchen on Kiev class Destroyer...that accounts for the goulash smell! Cheap though! the gaskets have been outsourced to a nice little lady from a small country over there somewhere..not exactly sure...but she does both windows and gaskets! Cheap, again! PS...am dating inspector's daughter...whoa...what a babe..looks a lot like.......Jes.....oh oh! Plan B!:doh: :doh: :doh: :shocked: 



fatlane said:


> Better hit all the cloning tanks, just in case we get inspected again this week. Only passed by five points last time. Wouldn't do to have our evil overlord license revoked for a few grotty cloning tank gaskets, now would it?
> 
> Nice job on the stealth jet. The anti-radar tinsel adds a fitting holiday touch.


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## Jes (Dec 5, 2005)

Obesus said:


> am dating inspector's daughter...whoa...what a babe..looks a lot like.......Jes.....oh oh! Plan B!:doh: :doh: :doh: :shocked:



wait a second...I AM an inspector's daughter. How can you be sure you're not dating me? And since my birthday is coming up, how can you be sure you've picked out the right gift for me?

love, 
Creamy Cakes.


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## fatlane (Dec 5, 2005)

Good help is _so_ hard to find these days.

BTW, here's my kung-fu posting methodology:

1. Click on "new posts".
2. Right-click on the last post icon for all the threads I want to respond to. Select "Open in new tab". Go Firefox.
3. Punch "New posts" again. See if any more recent responses have shown up. If so, right click for opening in a new tab. If not, then I hit "Quick Links" --> "Mark Forums Read" to clear the list.
4. Respond to the threads and go back to step one. 

It's a simple daily routine that's guaranteed to help you gain posts, or your money back!


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## ThatFatGirl (Dec 5, 2005)

Should one first consider whether or not they have anything relevant to contribute to a thread? Or should one just post for the sake of posting. Is quantity, not quality the goal?  

Up to #91... or is this #92?
TFG


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## Jes (Dec 5, 2005)

Fatlane, what do WE get when you make it to #2000? A day w/o posting?


OOOH. This kitten's got claws! Rrrrrrr.

and yes, I jes(t), les(t) you get mad. And cry.


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## fatlane (Dec 5, 2005)

Hey, I try and add to each thread I post to. I ain't me-too-ing. I just have a lot to type.


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## Jes (Dec 5, 2005)

fatlane said:


> Hey, I try and add to each thread I post to. I ain't me-too-ing. I just have a lot to type.



I kid because I love.


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## ThatFatGirl (Dec 9, 2005)

This is my 100th post. Just seemed right to share the milestone here...


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## fatlane (Dec 9, 2005)

YOU GO GIRL!

100 down, 900 to go.


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## CurvaceousBBWLover (Dec 12, 2005)

fatlane said:


> YOU GO GIRL!
> 
> 100 down, 900 to go.



I'm on post 120. Now I only have 880 posts to do so I can get my own thread just like you, Fatlane! LOL


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## fatlane (Dec 12, 2005)

Wow, I just realized I broke 1800... whoooo!~!


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## AnnMarie (Dec 13, 2005)

And..... wait for it...... 

*700!*


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## fatlane (Dec 13, 2005)

GO ANNMARIE!

You can do it... _all night long!_


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## bigsexy920 (Dec 13, 2005)

You need to start a new thread for your 2000th post which looks like it's right around the corner for you. Keep on Posting


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## fatlane (Dec 13, 2005)

176 to go as of this post... wow...

Hey, Conrad, what milestones do we got here? Just the one where we edit our own user titles, or are there others?


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## Webmaster (Dec 13, 2005)

fatlane said:


> 176 to go as of this post... wow...
> 
> Hey, Conrad, what milestones do we got here? Just the one where we edit our own user titles, or are there others?



No official milestone. I can set up "promotions" but so far I've only done one. The whole rep system really hasn't taken root yet here; there are other sites where it's gone so far that the administrators eventually disabled it altogether. vBulletin admin is very deep and has an almost endless number of things that can be changed and tuned.


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## CurvaceousBBWLover (Dec 13, 2005)

fatlane said:


> Wow, I just realized I broke 1800... whoooo!~!



Fatlane does it again.


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## Jes (Dec 13, 2005)

Webmaster said:


> No official milestone. I can set up "promotions" but so far I've only done one. The whole rep system really hasn't taken root yet here; there are other sites where it's gone so far that the administrators eventually disabled it altogether. vBulletin admin is very deep and has an almost endless number of things that can be changed and tuned.



I vote for snacks!

(I am now on a kooky metadata committee doing really neat stuff at my office, and today when we were brainstorming about future meetings I kept suggesting snacks. So stereotypical)


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## Obesus (Dec 14, 2005)

...and vitally important for morale if you are there for the long-haul. Snack-cakes and a refreshing soda are always in good taste! Snackers!  I second the motion...and I am closing in on 600 posts....how motivational! :bow: A gift of expensive Pop Art is also acceptable!


Jes said:


> I vote for snacks!
> 
> (I am now on a kooky metadata committee doing really neat stuff at my office, and today when we were brainstorming about future meetings I kept suggesting snacks. So stereotypical)


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## Egbert Souse (Dec 14, 2005)

*Egbert has flashback of life with wife #1, the compulsive talker, begins trembling uncontrollably, loses control of all bodily functions and goes catatonic*


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## Obesus (Dec 14, 2005)

...delivered from the burning shell of a dying star out on the periphery of the galactic spiral arms...thought provoking and pregnant with hidden meanings...:bow: We search for the Minotaur in the middle of the Labyrinth and the Maiden has granted us the boon of a golden thread.... 



ThatFatGirl said:


> Should one first consider whether or not they have anything relevant to contribute to a thread? Or should one just post for the sake of posting. Is quantity, not quality the goal?
> 
> Up to #91... or is this #92?
> TFG


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## Boteroesque Babe (Dec 14, 2005)

Egbert Souse said:


> *Egbert has flashback of life with wife #1, the compulsive talker, begins trembling uncontrollably, loses control of all bodily functions and goes catatonic*


BB mops Egbert's damp brow and tells him not to worry. Chippy's back. And Chippy will never allow Fatlane's SportPosting record to stand.

You'll see.


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## fatlane (Dec 14, 2005)

Unless Chippy and I start riffing off each other.

It has happened before, and can happen once more.

I will now eat a fun-size Mounds bar left over from Halloween.


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## bigsexy920 (Dec 14, 2005)

Love the mounds. They are the best ! :eat2:


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## Jack Skellington (Dec 14, 2005)

fatlane said:


> Wow, I just realized I broke 1800... whoooo!~!



Again, you have my sympathies.


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## fatlane (Dec 14, 2005)

I will now eat pistachios.


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## Obesus (Dec 15, 2005)

The magnetohydrodynamics of it all....the byzantine complexity...I am left with my mouth hanging open...mostly because I love pistachios...save some for your henchmen, eh?



fatlane said:


> I will now eat pistachios.


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## Jes (Dec 15, 2005)

SAUSAGEFEST

(as in: that's what this thread has turned into)


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## Obesus (Dec 15, 2005)

FOOD!??? I ask you that!! Aha! Sausages....oooooh, even though I am vegetarian and low sodium, you have tempted me....sausages.....! :shocked: You know my ONE and only weakness, my kryptonite....I am undone! 



Jes said:


> SAUSAGEFEST
> 
> (as in: that's what this thread has turned into)



...and I ask you, am I not the designated henchman of our beloved MASTER, Fatlane, who will very soon be celebrating the magnificence of 2,000 posts, while you and I plug around down at 600? I ask you! Aha! The Master and I have several meta-topics occuring over several boards...such is the complexity of our Haikus of the electron!


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## Jes (Dec 15, 2005)

In this case, read: sausage as: penis.

Perhaps now your response will change. Or, perhaps not.


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## Obesus (Dec 15, 2005)

Full retraction...or modification to altered circumstances...or mabe it is just because I haven't had any snack food or breakfast yet today! Oooooh...you youngsters keep using all this arcane Freudian terminology and I am a strict Lacanian and Object Relations personnage! Hmmmm...them two don't mix do they....hmmmm...cake MIX...oooooh..errr...it is hunger...must EAT! :bow:  




Jes said:


> In this case, read: sausage as: penis.
> 
> Perhaps now your response will change. Or, perhaps not.


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## CurvaceousBBWLover (Dec 15, 2005)

Obesus said:


> ...and vitally important for morale if you are there for the long-haul. Snack-cakes and a refreshing soda are always in good taste! Snackers!  I second the motion...and I am closing in on 600 posts....how motivational! :bow: A gift of expensive Pop Art is also acceptable!



I love my snacks!


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## fatlane (Dec 15, 2005)

*SAUSAGE CRATES COMING IN OVER THE BRINY!*







And where the hell was Biggles
When you needed him last Saturday?
And where were all the sportsmen
Who always pulled you through?

They're all resting down in Cornwall
Writing up their memoirs
For the paperback edition
Of the Boy Scout Manual...


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## Obesus (Dec 15, 2005)

Eh? Ze one zat we cannot see? Ooooooh....I help you out dere, Master, with my lightning fast typing and posting! :bow: 



fatlane said:


> *SAUSAGE CRATES COMING IN OVER THE BRINY!*
> 
> And where the hell was Biggles
> When you needed him last Saturday?
> ...


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## bigsexy920 (Dec 16, 2005)

fatlane said:


> I will now eat pistachios.




Red Or Regular?


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## fatlane (Dec 16, 2005)

bigsexy920 said:


> Red Or Regular?



Regular.

And thank you, Obesus. Somehow the image slipped my grasp...


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## Obesus (Dec 17, 2005)

The Maestro would never eat....red...pistachios! Ummmmm....uhhhhhhh....well, right then! I am sure all right thinking people are thinking rightly about that, right?  Ohhhh...it wouldn't be astrolgically appropriate! That's it! The STARS MUST BE RIGHT! Aha! Damn...don't want to get them started on that thing again! Damn!  



fatlane said:


> Regular.
> 
> And thank you, Obesus. Somehow the image slipped my grasp...


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## fatlane (Dec 17, 2005)

Well, THIS star is definitely not right.






And dont even get me started on "Hanoi Jane"... No, with Hollywood dominated by the lefties, Cthulhu is unlikely to rise anytime soon, Governor Ah-nold notwithstanding.


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## fatlane (Jan 15, 2006)

Post Number Two Thousand Five Hundred Right Here Baby!!!


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## Tina (Jan 15, 2006)

LOL

Hey, what ever happened to Obesus? He seems to have disappeared, as have several other people.


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## fatlane (Jan 15, 2006)

I ate them all. 

I am... OMNIPHAGE!

er, um... I thnk ol' Obesus opted for face-to-face meetings in the Greater Bay Area as a way to expend his spare time. Not angry, just rollin' on. We plan to stay in touch.


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## Tina (Jan 15, 2006)

Glad to hear he's okay.


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## LarryTheShiveringChipmunk (Jan 15, 2006)

ya know on my board we've had three #2 posters of all time just disappear (then of course over time they dwindle in the rankings). Maybe it's not a coincidence he disappeared after I joined *shifty eyes*


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## fatlane (Jan 15, 2006)

No, Chippy. It *is* a coincidence.

Now put your eyes back into neutral.


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