# Has anyone heard of this?



## biggzv (Dec 1, 2012)

I go to a gentlemen's club usually once or twice every 3 months. About 8 months ago, I ran across a girl that goes by Kendra. We talk everytime I'm out and we almost read each others' mind. She will also avoid people that would pay her alot more than me just to sit and talk with me. Just last week Friday, we were talking and she brought up the idea of us possibly having dinner sometime and I made a comment along the lines of I wasn't sure because I thought my size would frighten her if we tried to progress in potential relationship details. She leaned over and whispered in my ear, "I don't like skinny guys." I don't know what to think or what to do. We just started talking to each other outside of the place where she works. Should I go through and see what could potentially happen or should I let sleeping dogs lie?


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## BigChaz (Dec 1, 2012)

biggzv said:


> I go to a gentlemen's club usually once or twice every 3 months. About 8 months ago, I ran across a girl that goes by Kendra. We talk everytime I'm out and we almost read each others' mind. She will also avoid people that would pay her alot more than me just to sit and talk with me. Just last week Friday, we were talking and she brought up the idea of us possibly having dinner sometime and I made a comment along the lines of I wasn't sure because I thought my size would frighten her if we tried to progress in potential relationship details. She leaned over and whispered in my ear, "I don't like skinny guys." I don't know what to think or what to do. We just started talking to each other outside of the place where she works. Should I go through and see what could potentially happen or should I let sleeping dogs lie?



You should stop attempting to lie about such a shittily put together story. This is 12 year old level fantasy writing. SHAME.


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## biggzv (Dec 1, 2012)

Nobody has to believe it but it is my experience I just had last week.


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## biglynch (Dec 1, 2012)

if i could quote a favorite band of mine

"So, Bambi's goin' on about how she can make all my fantasies come true. 
So I says, "Even this one I have where Jesus Christ 
is jackhammering Mickey Mouse in the doo-doo hole 
with a lawn dart as Garth Brooks gives birth to something 
resembling a cheddar cheese log with almonds on Santa Claus's tummy-tum?" 
Well, ten beers, twenty minutes and thirty dollars later 
I'm parkin' the beef bus in tuna town if you know what I mean. 
Got yo nail 'er back at her trailer. 
Heh. That rhymes. 
I have to admit it was even more of a turn-on 
when I found out she was doin' me to buy baby formula."

*KENDRA IS A PRO HO!!! AND YOU ARE A FOOL IF YOU THINK ANY THING ELSE*

...and yo story is as fake as the tooth fairy.


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## Goreki (Dec 1, 2012)

Hahahahahaha!!!


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## Sasquatch! (Dec 1, 2012)

Bwaaaaaahahhahahhahhaha


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## Vanilla Gorilla (Dec 1, 2012)

biglynch said:


> *KENDRA IS A PRO HO!!! AND YOU ARE A FOOL IF YOU THINK ANY THING ELSE*



Either that or the next thing he writes will start out like Dear Penthouse...


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## LeoGibson (Dec 1, 2012)

The only time I have ever had a stripper want to hang outside the club was when I found one that loved the smell of my car keys as much as I did. Every 20-30 minutes we'd pull out my keys and have a good whiff.

Now I imagine all you need to do is look around and find one that might like the smell of yours and you will be in. Just don't forget the baggie full of magic stripper dust to put on the end of your key to make the smell more attractive!


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## seeker421 (Dec 1, 2012)

Be sure to give her all of your money and then wait for her in the empty parking garage just outside of town.


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## MRdobolina (Dec 1, 2012)

file under...

"cool story bro" 

"pics or it didnt happen"


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## biggzv (Dec 1, 2012)

Since nobody seems to believe anyone on this site and everyone seems to be bigger jerks than I know around town, how do I delete all my forums I posted


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## Dr. Feelgood (Dec 1, 2012)

biggzv said:


> Since nobody seems to believe anyone on this site and everyone seems to be bigger jerks than I know around town, how do I delete all my forums I posted



You don't. Welcome to the Hotel California.


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## Sasquatch! (Dec 1, 2012)

biggzv said:


> Since nobody seems to believe anyone on this site and everyone seems to be bigger jerks than I know around town, how do I delete all my forums I posted



Welcome to the internet.

What did you _honestly_ expect? That everyone would believe you just because you said it happened? 

I just... *sigh*... you should probably take one of those senior citizen "safety on the internet" classes or something.


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## Paquito (Dec 1, 2012)

However will you solve the mystery of the Invisible Feeder FFAs if you leave? What a quitter.


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## biggzv (Dec 1, 2012)

I don't want a ffa if she would act and talk like half the A holes on here


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## dharmabean (Dec 1, 2012)

MRdobolina said:


> "pics or it didnt happen"




HAHHA I actually snorted out loud.


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## LeoGibson (Dec 1, 2012)

biggzv said:


> Since nobody seems to believe anyone on this site and everyone seems to be bigger jerks than I know around town, how do I delete all my forums I posted



Dude, seriously? You're whining and whimpering like a pup after all your posts up to this point have been about how to hook up with ffa's and do they really exist and just all sorts of nonsense and now because you have gone from making those posts to having now met the elusive ffa and that isn't even enough, she also happens to be, wait for it, a stripper. What's the next post going to be? How she is also a nympho whose rich father owns a liquor store? For fuck's sake just ease in and join in a few threads, let folks get to know you and that you are a real person. Stop with all this inane drivel unless you really are a troll just looking to stir the stink. You could be a decent human being, or you could be an ass, that's the point, we don't know. So just chill and let the other dogs sniff your arse a bit and bring you into the pack, then you can be a nutter if you want. No one will pay it any mind by that point. In other words just be a human being first and save this wackiness for a bit, ok?


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## MrBob (Dec 1, 2012)

LeoGibson said:


> Dude, seriously? You're whining and whimpering like a pup after all your posts up to this point have been about how to hook up with ffa's and do they really exist and just all sorts of nonsense and now because you have gone from making those posts to having now met the elusive ffa and that isn't even enough, she also happens to be, wait for it, a stripper. What's the next post going to be? How she is also a nympho whose rich father owns a liquor store? For fuck's sake just ease in and join in a few threads, let folks get to know you and that you are a real person. Stop with all this inane drivel unless you really are a troll just looking to stir the stink. You could be a decent human being, or you could be an ass, that's the point, we don't know. So just chill and let the other dogs sniff your arse a bit and bring you into the pack, then you can be a nutter if you want. No one will pay it any mind by that point. In other words just be a human being first and save this wackiness for a bit, ok?



A nymphomaniac stripper with a rich, liquor store owning daddy....don't fuck with my dream Leo!


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## samuraiscott (Dec 1, 2012)

No offense to the OP but the girl is taught to say things like that in order to get you to spend more money on her. If she can get her hooks into a big man who seems to her to be lonely and have more money than sense, she will spend time with you that she could have spent with someone else making a little extra in the hopes that she can turn you into her own personal ATM machine.

People all the time think that us big folks cannot get anyone interested in them so they think they can use us. It happens to women all the time. It also happens to men but we never talk about it because we are supposed to know better. Just like women we can become lonely and down on ourselves. We can be brainwashed to think we don't deserve anything real or good. That we should take what we can get. This of course isn't true, but when you are down on yourself or you are victimized, it's not always easy to see.

I hope you can see this before she takes you for all you are worth. That is to say, if your story is true.


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## Hozay J Garseeya (Dec 1, 2012)

LeoGibson said:


> Dude, seriously? You're whining and whimpering like a pup after all your posts up to this point have been about how to hook up with ffa's and do they really exist and just all sorts of nonsense and now because you have gone from making those posts to having now met the elusive ffa and that isn't even enough, she also happens to be, wait for it, a stripper. What's the next post going to be? How she is also a nympho whose rich father owns a liquor store? For fuck's sake just ease in and join in a few threads, let folks get to know you and that you are a real person. Stop with all this inane drivel unless you really are a troll just looking to stir the stink. You could be a decent human being, or you could be an ass, that's the point, we don't know. So just chill and let the other dogs sniff your arse a bit and bring you into the pack, then you can be a nutter if you want. No one will pay it any mind by that point. In other words just be a human being first and save this wackiness for a bit, ok?



I only.sniff paco's ass.


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## HDANGEL15 (Dec 2, 2012)

biggzv said:


> I don't want a ffa if she would act and talk like half the A holes on here



*interesting you say that....as hardly any responses you got were actually from FFAs........but MEN*


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## LeoGibson (Dec 2, 2012)

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> I only.sniff paco's ass.



Me too. It smells like bubble gum and sunshine.:happy:


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## LeoGibson (Dec 2, 2012)

MrBob said:


> A nymphomaniac stripper with a rich, liquor store owning daddy....don't fuck with my dream Leo!



Here you go Mr. Bob, just for you Rich, Young, Dumb Nymphomaniac


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## Sasquatch! (Dec 2, 2012)

HDANGEL15 said:


> *interesting you say that....as hardly any responses you got were actually from FFAs........but MEN*



HD, I don't think you stand a chance against a stripper who values his body AND his mind.


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## vardon_grip (Dec 2, 2012)

Maybe the OPs story is true and maybe it isnt. It is no skin off my ass to accept the OPs story at face value. I dont need to get emotionally involved with every post I read on Dimensions. What do I care if he needs a big can of Bitch-B-Gon© to keep all the strippers from hanging all over him? 
IT IS THE TRUTHso what ?
IT IS A LIEso what? 
It means sweet FA (not that FA-the other FA) to me.
Lets say that the OP is exaggerating the storyits not hard to imagine that a fat man doesnt feel desired very often and is desperate to feel wanted. Maybe the OP is young or inexperienced or both; doesnt have many friends and just wants to tell a story that ingratiates him to the group he is trying to impress. Im sure most of us have told a fake story or two so that we would be accepted by the boys. Maybe he just wants to talk to another person. No one here is such a big swinging dick that they cant relate to another fat mans isolation and loneliness. 
I have felt ugly, worthless and unwanted. I have dated strippers, models, actresses, actress/model/strippers, actress/model/escorts, actress/waitresses, porn stars and web models. I could be lying my ass off or telling the truth, but if I am not trying to scam you out of your credit card numberwho cares?


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## BigChaz (Dec 2, 2012)

vardon_grip said:


> Maybe the OP’s story is true and maybe it isn’t. It is no skin off my ass to accept the OP’s story at face value. I don’t need to get emotionally involved with every post I read on Dimensions. What do I care if he needs a big can of “Bitch-B-Gon”© to keep all the strippers from hanging all over him?
> IT IS THE TRUTH…so what ?
> IT IS A LIE…so what?
> It means sweet FA (not that FA-the other FA) to me.
> ...



This is a terrible opinion. But who cares, right?

Edit:

I have decided to elaborate. If someone is feeding me a bunch of bullshit all the time, regardless of the medium, I have no desire to participate nor is there any reason to participate. Why would I knowingly interact with people or situations built entirely upon a foundation of bullshit? Something doesnt have to be a scam or similar in order to be considered a failure. I find it a lot more fun to make fun of a pathetic jackass than to spend time "helping" someone who is most certainly spinning a fantasy story in a "serious" post. I promise you when he wrote that post, he had a boner.


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## MRdobolina (Dec 2, 2012)

stripclubs give me a boner ....


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## sarahe543 (Dec 2, 2012)

je n'existe pas


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## Sasquatch! (Dec 2, 2012)

sarahe543 said:


> je n'existe pas



Evidemment. Il n'y a pas de femmes sur l'Internet


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## Librarygirl (Dec 2, 2012)

Sasquatch! said:


> Evidemment. Il n'y a pas de femmes sur l'Internet



Ahhh.. Il y en a, mais on se cache.....


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## Sasquatch! (Dec 2, 2012)

Librarygirl said:


> Ahhh.. Il y en a, mais on se cache.....



Ou? Dans une biblioteque? Dans une brasserie? Sous un pont?


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## Librarygirl (Dec 2, 2012)

Sasquatch! said:


> Ou? Dans une biblioteque? Dans une brasserie? Sous un pont?



Chez Starbucks!!! Ou bien dans une bibliotheque. Il faut savoir ou chercher

(désolée...Je n'arrive pas a trouver les accents...)


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## Sasquatch! (Dec 2, 2012)

Librarygirl said:


> Chez Starbucks!!! Ou bien dans une bibliotheque. Il faut savoir ou chercher
> 
> (désolée...Je n'arrive pas a trouver les accents...)



J'était dans un Starbucks samedi matin et j'en ai trouvé aucune! Quel dommage! Peut-etre vous devrez metre une chemise ou un chapeau special pour etre reconnaitre plus simplement?


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## agouderia (Dec 2, 2012)

Librarygirl said:


> (désolée...Je n'arrive pas a trouver les accents...)





Sasquatch! said:


> J'était dans un Starbucks samedi matin et j'en ai trouvé aucune! Quel dommage! Peut-etre vous devrez metre une chemise ou un chapeau special pour etre reconnaitre plus simplement?





Nous nous cachons souvent derrière un manuel de grammaire ou orthographie française . toujours en train de perfectionner notre maitrise de cette belle langue.


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## Sasquatch! (Dec 2, 2012)

agouderia said:


> Nous nous cachons souvent derrière un manuel de grammaire ou orthographie française . toujours en train de perfectionner notre maitrise de cette belle langue.



Vous entendez-ca, les mecs? Maintenant il y a aucune raison pour vous plaindre


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## BigChaz (Dec 2, 2012)

Hamburgair


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## agouderia (Dec 2, 2012)

Sasquatch! said:


> Vous entendez-ca, les mecs? Maintenant il y a aucune raison pour vous plaindre



Je doute vraiment que le mec qui a initialisé ce fil avec ses imbécilités possède les capacités linguistiques de suivre notre discussion .


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## Hozay J Garseeya (Dec 2, 2012)

Todo esto me vale madre.


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## dharmabean (Dec 2, 2012)

No podría estar más de acuerdo


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## MRdobolina (Dec 2, 2012)

&#1063;&#1090;&#1086; &#1087;&#1088;&#1086;&#1080;&#1089;&#1093;&#1086;&#1076;&#1080;&#1090; &#1079;&#1076;&#1077;&#1089;&#1100;


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## Sasquatch! (Dec 2, 2012)

agouderia said:


> Je doute vraiment que le mec qui a initialisé ce fil avec ses imbécilités possède les capacités linguistiques de suivre notre discussion .



Hahahaha! Agouderia, s'il te plais... écris ici plus! T'es trop marrant!


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## MrBob (Dec 2, 2012)

Quid est hoc ineptiis?


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## LeoGibson (Dec 2, 2012)

Yo quiero Taco Bell


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## MRdobolina (Dec 2, 2012)

i read taco bell ... i got a boner


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## dharmabean (Dec 2, 2012)

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> Todo esto me vale madre.



Me llevó cuatro años de español en la escuela secundaria.

Puedo leer español, y habla muy poco.

Tengo que usar el traductor de google para escribir una respuesta.  :kiss2:


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## Hozay J Garseeya (Dec 2, 2012)

dharmabean said:


> Me llevó cuatro años de español en la escuela secundaria.
> 
> Puedo leer español, y habla muy poco.
> 
> Tengo que usar el traductor de google para escribir una respuesta.  :kiss2:



cada vez que veo una mujer Americana escribir o hablar español me pongo muy, muy interesado;-)


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## Sasquatch! (Dec 2, 2012)

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> cada vez que veo una mujer Americana escribir o hablar español me pongo muy, muy interesado;-)



Le estoy juzgando. Con base en mi ignorancia.


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## dharmabean (Dec 2, 2012)

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> cada vez que veo una mujer Americana escribir o hablar español me pongo muy, muy interesado;-)



Tengo que admitir que me estoy engañando usando google para escribir una respuesta.

:: blush ::

Se supone que tengo que volver a la universidad, si yo quiero actualizar mi español.


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## fat hiker (Dec 2, 2012)

agouderia said:


> Je doute vraiment que le mec qui a initialisé ce fil avec ses imbécilités possède les capacités linguistiques de suivre notre discussion .



Moi, je le doute aussi.


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## LeoGibson (Dec 2, 2012)

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> cada vez que veo una mujer Americana escribir o hablar español me pongo muy, muy interesado;-)



Ole, tu eres a cochino perro viejo en todas linguas! Su, senor tienes todas nalgas cabron.

Yo leer y escribir mas bueno pero muchos anos trabajando con Mexicanos puedes mi por hablo. Tambien, no google!


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## dharmabean (Dec 2, 2012)

No es justo, no puedo dejar de respuestas de google. Sea amable señor Gibson, puedo leer y entender lo que escribiste.


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## Paquito (Dec 2, 2012)

Me encanta Jose. :wubu:


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## sarahe543 (Dec 3, 2012)

ich bin ein berliner


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## agouderia (Dec 3, 2012)

sarahe543 said:


> ich bin ein berliner



Echt? Mit einem Namen wie Sarah wärst Du eher eine Berliner*in* ... 

Or are you actually trying to tell us you're a sweet 'Berliner' well filled with jelly and with tasty frosting??? 

http://www.mamas-rezepte.de/rezept_Berliner___Krapfen-6-214.html


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## LeoGibson (Dec 3, 2012)

Alright, the German has come out. Better watch them. :blink: Every time I hear that language it sounds to me like they're about to try and take over some shit.


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## sarahe543 (Dec 3, 2012)

oh I know 'ich bin ein berliner' is supposedly a famous gaffe made by a politician, but yes I am as sweet as a doughnut.


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## Vanilla Gorilla (Dec 3, 2012)

Mmmmmm flaming hot doughnut covered with honey.

Sorry flashback from Duck Dynasty the other night.


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## JenFromOC (Dec 3, 2012)

vardon_grip said:


> Maybe the OPs story is true and maybe it isnt. It is no skin off my ass to accept the OPs story at face value. I dont need to get emotionally involved with every post I read on Dimensions. What do I care if he needs a big can of Bitch-B-Gon© to keep all the strippers from hanging all over him?
> IT IS THE TRUTHso what ?
> IT IS A LIEso what?
> It means sweet FA (not that FA-the other FA) to me.
> ...



This is why I love you. You are always so spot on.


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## bbwbud (Dec 3, 2012)

Ut-whay is Ench-Fray for Oner-Bay??


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## BLK360 (Dec 3, 2012)

bbwbud said:


> Ut-whay is Ench-Fray for Oner-Bay??



Peteu is french canadian slang for it. If that helps.


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## The Dark Lady (Dec 3, 2012)

ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn


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## CastingPearls (Dec 3, 2012)

The Dark Lady said:


> ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn


Oh bless you. I was waiting for some real communication.


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## freakyfred (Dec 3, 2012)

The Dark Lady said:


> ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn


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## BigChaz (Dec 4, 2012)

The Dark Lady said:


> ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn


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## ~KawaiiFFA~ (Dec 5, 2012)

BigChaz said:


> holy shit



I'm in my University library and I just started making noises like a dying pig trying to contain my laughter. What the actual f*ck.


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## cakeboy (Dec 5, 2012)

I LOL'ed. Now who wants to study chemistry with me and engage in an orgy of heavy petting and chocolate noming?


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