# "you're not supposed to wear that"!



## MissToodles (May 19, 2006)

About a month ago, I wore a short skirt in public. I thought that the sight of my dimpled thighs and chubby knees would horrify everyone. I did catch a few glances but all in all no one really cared...

That's the thing. You think the entire world is centered around your fat or any other "flaw". But this isn't true. You walk through life being invisible, only noticed when detractors or admirers cross your path.

I can't believe how free I felt on the bus, on the subway, on the street more exposed than I ever been in my entire life. I could care less about exposing my arms but legs imply much,much more. They are more sexual, the map leading to those types of activities.

I think everyone should go outside their comfort zone even for a few minutes. It really changes your perspective on everything.


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## LillyBBBW (May 19, 2006)

I plan on trying it this summer. You've no idea how feaked out I am about it.


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## sunandshadow (May 19, 2006)

I went through the same thing going out with unshaven legs after I decided to quit shaving. It helped to go with a supportive friend the first time.


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## Tina (May 19, 2006)

LillyBBBW said:


> I plan on trying it this summer. You've no idea how feaked out I am about it.



Yes, Lilly, I do. I still struggle with that, as someone who has stage three lymphedema, and who never liked her legs so much to begin with. Maybe we can encourage each other...


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## LillyBBBW (May 19, 2006)

Tina said:


> Yes, Lilly, I do. I still struggle with that, as someone who has stage three lymphedema, and who never liked her legs so much to begin with. Maybe we can encourage each other...



I don't know if I would be much help. I'm certaint that no matter what I do I will imagine that EVERYONE is looking at me. If they're not, I will imagine that they are deliberately avoiding looking because they are trying to be polite. It's partially a sickness of the mind.


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## twinklebelle (May 19, 2006)

See, now I'm the same way about my arms. I can't even begin to think about wearing shorter skirts out in public.....yet. I'm taking baby steps and I'm going to try to wear something sleeveless this summer. 

Kudos to you, Toodles! You're an inspiration. I'm gonna be flashing some big girl arm tomorrow.


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## Tina (May 20, 2006)

LillyBBBW said:


> I don't know if I would be much help. I'm certaint that no matter what I do I will imagine that EVERYONE is looking at me. If they're not, I will imagine that they are deliberately avoiding looking because they are trying to be polite. It's partially a sickness of the mind.



I know this all too well, too. I don't have this problem in my daily life, but I often feel this way whenever I take a new step like the shorter skirt thing. Self-talk helps some. For me, I think it has to do with my childhood and feeling under the microscope at home and at school. Knowing where it comes from I just tell myself to be quiet and focus on other things or I can get all wound up freak out about it inside.


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## AnnMarie (May 20, 2006)

I overcame the sleeves thing years ago, and have never been so happy to have all of my shirt choices open up.... I love it. 

But I can't get past the capri/skirts thing. I can wear them at our events sometimes, but never ever anywhere else. I think since my legs are just beyond fat, they're downright ODD (ankles) compared to anyone else's... I just can't get over it, and the looks just aren't worth the reward to me. 

I guess what I mean is that I don't WANT to wear the capris enough to bother going through it, I enjoy my jeans, and I'm not suffering in anyway by wearing long pants all the time... they don't make me hot or feel weird... 

Anyway... good for you, J... I'm glad you jumped a hurdle.


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## eightyseven (May 20, 2006)

LillyBBBW said:


> I don't know if I would be much help. I'm certaint that no matter what I do I will imagine that EVERYONE is looking at me. If they're not, I will imagine that they are deliberately avoiding looking because they are trying to be polite. It's partially a sickness of the mind.



If you want to believe that EVERYONE is looking at you, then just remember that 33% or so of men (even if they're not willing to admit it) find big women aesthetically/physically/sexually pleasing. Just think about those people (and the other big girls out there who I'm sure would be really proud of you) and zone out everyone else. I really wish you the best of luck in overcoming what it is you wish to overcome and I hope my advice, even if it doesn't help, is encouraging


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## BBW Betty (May 20, 2006)

Good for you, Miss T! :bow: I remember similar feelings when my husband bought me a two-piece swimsuit.  My mother would be horrified to see me wear it,  and I'm still a little self-conscious, but I love it.

I'm looking forward to summer, and getting out the shorts again.


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## TheSadeianLinguist (May 20, 2006)

Oi. Clothing freaks me out. Shorts. sleeveless shirts, swimsuits. I'm convinced, like Lilly said, it's mostly got to do with having a disordered mind, more than being a certain size. All you can do is force yourself to break your comfort level a little each day, whether the shirt's form-fitting, has cap sleeves or no sleeves, whether it's lowcut, or you're wearing shorts or capris or a skirt.

Hell, I feel terrified of wearing a skirt. Kudos to y'all brave enough to do it.


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## MissToodles (May 20, 2006)

May I add, I also don't shave my underarms so I had a double hurdle! I really don't like shaving and say fuck it all. Love me, love my fat legs and love my hairy pits lol.


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## Sandie_Zitkus (May 20, 2006)

Ladies Ladies PLEASE - as someone who used to only wear long sleeve shirts and long pants this is something that will FREE YOU if you can overcome it!!

I wear what the hell I want out. That includes short shorts - tank tops - sleeveless shirts. 

You will thank yourself for doing this and you will be much more comfy. And you can PM me if you need encouragement!!

DO IT! You will love it!!


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## BeaBea (May 20, 2006)

I'm on the baby steps programme too...

This summer I'm determinded to go sleeveless as much as I can. I dislike my upper arms as I think they are a strange shape but I'm hoping if I can get a bit of colour on them I'll like them more. I occasionally wear jeans or capri's out but only with a top long enough to cover my tummy. 

I have to say though, I do look at big women I see them out and about a LOT. I hope they dont think I am being hostile but to be honest all I'm doing is checking out their clothes. 

My other half checks big women out too and sometimes I have to remind him to smile. He sometimes gets so lost in admiration that his facial expression goes a bit blank (its the prelude to drooling... ) I would hate to think he had ever upset a BBW and that she thought he was disapproving when in actual fact he's speechless with lust. 

I suppose the point I'm making is that he and I might both look like we are judging and disapproving of people but we're really not. I'm sure the same is true of a high proportion of the rest of the population too. 

Add me to the list of the ones trying to extend their comfort zone though. Maybe we need a thread where we can announce our progress? 

Tracey xx

www.beabea.co.uk


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## Stealth (May 20, 2006)

I got my other half to wear a belly top the other day, That was awesome 

It meant that i had to walk around with my bag right in front of me when she was in view shocked , but it was worth it! She claims she felt like a new woman too


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## NancyGirl74 (May 20, 2006)

Sandie_Zitkus said:


> Ladies Ladies PLEASE - as someone who used to only wear long sleeve shirts and long pants this is something that will FREE YOU if you can overcome it!!
> 
> I wear what the hell I want out. That includes short shorts - tank tops - sleeveless shirts.
> 
> ...




But how do you get to such a stage of self confidence? I was looking that the _Love Your Peaches_ site and they have the cutest BBW bikinis. I have one picked out and everything...and yet I can't click the purchase button. I just can't! :doh:

Tank tops and shorts? Forget about it! The shortest skirt I own hangs mid-thigh...The shortest skirt I'll actually wear in public reaches just below my knees and even that took sooo much courage for me to wear. This involved much standing in front of the mirror saying, "You can do it" over and over to myself. And when I did wear it (which was to a BBW dance) I received many positive remarks but I haven't worn it again since.  

This self-doubt thing is a killer. I'm slowly getting more and more confident but I still find that nagging doubt to be very annoying for it's persistence.


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## TheSadeianLinguist (May 20, 2006)

You get to that stage of confidence by doing it and faking that it doesn't bother you.


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## EvilPrincess (May 20, 2006)

NancyGirl74 said:


> This self-doubt thing is a killer. I'm slowly getting more and more confident but I still find that nagging doubt to be very annoying for it's persistence.


 
I hear you! I was all ready to go out to dinner this evening, tank top, shorts, cute shoes, matching bag. As I left the bedroom I walked by the full length mirror, got one look at the arms, turned around and changed. 

Maybe tomorrow.  It could be like quiting smoking, the more you try it the better the success rate?


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## Santaclear (May 20, 2006)

LillyBBBW said:


> I don't know if I would be much help. I'm certain that no matter what I do I will imagine that EVERYONE is looking at me. If they're not, I will imagine that they are deliberately avoiding looking because they are trying to be polite. It's partially a sickness of the mind.



I certainly would be looking at you and Tina (I try to be surreptitious) :smitten: :smitten: but I do the deliberately avoiding-thing too.


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## AnnMarie (May 21, 2006)

TheSadeianLinguist said:


> You get to that stage of confidence by doing it and faking that it doesn't bother you.



Exactly... you fake it til you make it. Start off with small steps, like wearing the sleeveless shirt to a store that's almost empty, or running a quick errand to the post office - maybe you only have to get out of the car for a minute, but you wore it out. 

Trust me, it's SUCH a great feeling to let these things go. I know I posted that I don't wear shorts (bleck, don't even like them) or capris (these I MIGHT wear if I could get past it)... but the sleeveless thing really is easy to get by if you put your mind to it. 

Don't think about it as something to move past, think about it as something you're doing for YOU... as a present. You'll be glad you did it... I just got two of the CUTEST tanks from LB for summer.


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## Sandie_Zitkus (May 21, 2006)

Do one thing at a time. Wear a short sleeve shirt. Then try shorts that go to your knee. etc. One step at a time. 

I got to the point where I just said to myself:

"I'm a big girl - they are gonna look at me no matter what I wear. So why the hell don't I just wear what I want.?"

I wear slippers to go shopping when I feel like it too. I just don't care!!!   



NancyGirl74 said:


> But how do you get to such a stage of self confidence? I was looking that the _Love Your Peaches_ site and they have the cutest BBW bikinis. I have one picked out and everything...and yet I can't click the purchase button. I just can't! :doh:
> 
> Tank tops and shorts? Forget about it! The shortest skirt I own hangs mid-thigh...The shortest skirt I'll actually wear in public reaches just below my knees and even that took sooo much courage for me to wear. This involved much standing in front of the mirror saying, "You can do it" over and over to myself. And when I did wear it (which was to a BBW dance) I received many positive remarks but I haven't worn it again since.
> 
> This self-doubt thing is a killer. I'm slowly getting more and more confident but I still find that nagging doubt to be very annoying for it's persistence.


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## missaf (May 21, 2006)

I've never had a problem wearing shorts, and I've always worn shortsleeves or sleeveless. I've never had anyone say anything, I'd probably be mortified if they did!


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## Fuzzy (May 21, 2006)

missaf said:


> I've never had a problem wearing shorts, and I've always worn shortsleeves or sleeveless. I've never had anyone say anything, I'd probably be mortified if they did!



What missaf fails to mention here, is the rapid tasmanian devil she has on a leash when outside.. and I wouldn't say anything contrary either.


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## Mini (May 21, 2006)

If it makes y'all feel better, I used to have trouble wearing shorts and t-shirts because I was so thin.

I know it's not quite the same, but just know that it bothers everyone sometimes. Best advice I can give is to learn to love two words: "Fuck it."

Say, y'know, fuck it, I'm gonna look good and be comfortable on my own terms, and fuck you if you disapprove.

You'll be amazed what you can do when you realise you don't have to give a fuck about some things.


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## EvilPrincess (May 21, 2006)

As I posted in the Confessions thread, I went out today in a tank top and shorts. Starbucks go an eye full of fatgirl arms and legs. Nobody died, nobody said anything..... although I wish they had! When I got home I realized said tank top was on inside out! 


Keeping with the spirit, I turned it right side out, and went to our neighborhood association picnic. Again, no dead bodies, no big scene, just fatgirl arms and knees enjoying the breeze. 

Okay now someone tell me how to keep the damn bra straps in place! Or my next fat outing might be commando :shocked:


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## Karebr12 (May 21, 2006)

I completely understand how everyone here feels. I wouldn't wear anything short sleeved or sleeveless because I was afraid EVERYONE IN THE WORLD would be staring at my fat arms and I'm 130lbs (at 5'9"). I suppose maybe a lot of this is a mental burden for a lot of us...
But yeah, I'm with the "F it" variety now because I picked out some really cute tops that were strappy the other day and actually had the balls to wear one to class. Go me! lol!


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## Jes (May 21, 2006)

I shopped today, and I bought this shirt for myself.
http://lanebryant.charmingshoppes.com/Shopping/product.aspx?product_id=L9600019&nav=L9

There's a lot of exposed skin, there. The sleeves are quite short (slightly tight on me too, which stinks. My upper arms seem to be a bit too big for my size if that makes sense), and the chest is also exposed. So is the back. And I really debated about buying it--would I have the balls to wear it? And then I remembered this thread and I thought: why not. Buy it in the hopes of wearing it on some day when it really is 98 degrees and you need to be cool. And look like you're from Mayberry.


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## BBW Betty (May 21, 2006)

EvilPrincess said:


> Okay now someone tell me how to keep the damn bra straps in place! Or my next fat outing might be commando :shocked:



LOL, I know exactly what you mean. In fact, this is more like the reason I want sleeves on my shirts. I buy bras that have straps a good 2 inches wide. Now if I could only find shirts/blouses that don't have such gosh-awful big necks on them. One way or the other, my bra always shows.  

Jes--that's a really cute top. Yes, yes, yes, wear it!


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## NancyGirl74 (May 21, 2006)

Jes said:


> I shopped today, and I bought this shirt for myself.
> http://lanebryant.charmingshoppes.com/Shopping/product.aspx?product_id=L9600019&nav=L9
> 
> There's a lot of exposed skin, there. The sleeves are quite short (slightly tight on me too, which stinks. My upper arms seem to be a bit too big for my size if that makes sense), and the chest is also exposed. So is the back. And I really debated about buying it--would I have the balls to wear it? And then I remembered this thread and I thought: why not. Buy it in the hopes of wearing it on some day when it really is 98 degrees and you need to be cool. And look like you're from Mayberry.




I agree. The shirt is very cute and I'm sure it looks great on you.

I was in LB today too looking for a bathing suit. I had no idea they didn't sell them in stores. The check out chick was rather snotty when she told me that I could only get them online. I said screw that (in my head) and went to Fashion Bug instead. 

I didn't wear anything brave today. I wanted to but it was rainy and windy...


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## Matt (May 21, 2006)

BeaBea said:


> I suppose the point I'm making is that he and I might both look like we are judging and disapproving of people but we're really not. I'm sure the same is true of a high proportion of the rest of the population too.



I always feel that way when "checking out" women while I'm out and about. I wonder if they think I'm disapproving of them when I'm really not. Oh well.


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## LillyBBBW (May 21, 2006)

I had a major gig today and wore a sleeveless floor length gown. I wore a burnout velvet duster over it so no one could see my arms however I did take the duster off when I got in the car, drove away and waved goodbye to all the musicians in the parking lot with my arms and shoulders exposed. I drove the entire way like that. 

Baby steps.


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## Kimberleigh (May 21, 2006)

EvilPrincess said:


> Okay now someone tell me how to keep the damn bra straps in place! Or my next fat outing might be commando :shocked:



Double sided clothing tape - it's called Topstick. Looks like transparent bandaids. You stick it to the bra straps and then the straps of the shirt. 
I bought a box of 50 strips ages ago...sorry I don't remember where, I want to say JoAnnes maybe.


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## Jes (May 22, 2006)

NancyGirl74 said:


> I agree. The shirt is very cute and I'm sure it looks great on you.
> 
> I was in LB today too looking for a bathing suit. :


Why didn't I see you there?? 
I bought my last suit from LB (in the store) so they used to carry them, right? Or those were some damned good drugs I was on. 

I bought a twinset with sparkly beads, the Mayberry shirt, a tank to go under it if I want (I realized it'd be far too cold for any place with A/C), 4 other cotton button-down short-sleeved shirts, a pair of workout pants for the gym, and a tshirt for the same place. 10 pieces for $143. Oh yes I did.


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## Sandie_Zitkus (May 22, 2006)

I wore a tank top and shorts today without a bra. It was over 90 today. Look at other women wearing tank tops with bras - the straps always show. Who cares?? Just make sure the bra is clean.


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## lipmixgirl (May 22, 2006)

as for me, being the big apple, i love to wear my short short skirts... and have always covered up my arms... i think this weekend at the party i am going to totally bust out my hooker wear... throw caution to the wind! viva! let there be arms!


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## Miss Vickie (May 22, 2006)

Jes said:


> I shopped today, and I bought this shirt for myself.
> http://lanebryant.charmingshoppes.com/Shopping/product.aspx?product_id=L9600019&nav=L9
> 
> There's a lot of exposed skin, there. The sleeves are quite short (slightly tight on me too, which stinks. My upper arms seem to be a bit too big for my size if that makes sense), and the chest is also exposed. So is the back. And I really debated about buying it--would I have the balls to wear it? And then I remembered this thread and I thought: why not. Buy it in the hopes of wearing it on some day when it really is 98 degrees and you need to be cool. And look like you're from Mayberry.



Jes, that shirt's really cute -- that's a f un pattern, and it looks like a nice, fun, light shirt. I bet it looks nice on you and I hope you wear it; I really think that people are paying far less attention to us and how we look than we do of ourselves, if that makes sense. But it's easy to be self conscious, especially if you focus on a certain body part that you're not particularly pleased with.

Like you, my upper arms seem large for my body -- always have, and it's a trait I seem to have inherited from my mom. (It's not the only thing but the less said about my smartass sense of humor the better). I've always been self conscious about them, and believe me they're even WORSE now because I've lost close to 8" on each arm (yes that's EACH arm, not total for both) and they look awful, even worse than they did before. I'm no closer now to going sleeveless than I was before. But I do have some cute, very sheer shirts that I wear over tank tops that are light enough to be comfortable without making me feel that my bat wings are too exposed.


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## MissToodles (May 22, 2006)

I defintely have my own hang ups and far from perfect. I love fashion and clothing. I just let too many years pass by without wearing what I love. I may dress "childish" or "immature" for my age but it makes me happy. My arms aren't shameful, they are only made shameful if I covered them up because I reinforce the message that I should be covered up.


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## Jes (May 22, 2006)

Sandie_Zitkus said:


> I wore a tank top and shorts today without a bra. It was over 90 today. Look at other women wearing tank tops with bras - the straps always show. Who cares?? Just make sure the bra is clean.


Thing is, bra straps showing are the absolute fashion and have been for the last ... at least 3 years now. The 'rule' is: just have a bra that's an obviously different color from what you're wearing so that it looks intentional.


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## chubbychaser48 (May 22, 2006)

Good on you. I wish more plus sized women would wear short skirts in public!! believe me, there are more people out there that appreciate it than you think.


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## fatgirl33 (May 22, 2006)

LillyBBBW said:


> I had a major gig today and wore a sleeveless floor length gown. I wore a burnout velvet duster over it so no one could see my arms however I did take the duster off when I got in the car, drove away and waved goodbye to all the musicians in the parking lot with my arms and shoulders exposed. I drove the entire way like that.
> 
> Baby steps.




Lilly, you have the sexiest arms! :smitten: You should show them off! 

(Easy for me to say, someone who refuses to wear shorts!  )

Brenda


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## fatlane (May 22, 2006)

I'll try wearing a short skirt, too. 

Should I shave my legs, though? I mean, will it make that much of a difference on a guy?


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## JoyJoy (May 22, 2006)

TheSadeianLinguist said:


> You get to that stage of confidence by doing it and faking that it doesn't bother you.


 
Yes, yes, yes! This is the only way I ever got to the point of changing how I dress!

When I was younger and thinner, I wasted so much time worrying about putting myself in a position where I would have to wear shorts or a swimsuit...I missed out on so much because I was so worried about what others would think of how I looked! THEN...I got fat, and there was no way anyone was ever going to get me in a pair of shorts. I can still remember the almost debilitating feeling of KNOWING that everyone was looking at me, disgusted by what they saw. 

Women like Ann Marie and Heather inspired me to the point that I decided to stop sitting on the sidelines and take the plunge, faking it much of the time. Now I can't imagine wearing the tent-like clothes I used to wear, and *love* the freedom of being able to wear almost anything I want. It's not like I can hide the fact that I'm fat underneath any clothes, so why not be comfortable with it, and wear tanks, shorts, etc? 

This is also a great way of weeding out the people who can't see past outward appearances. Those who look at me odd when I'm wearing shorts or a tank (or anything that doesn't *hide* me) are the ones I'm sending a message to...so I can look them in the eye, give them a nice smile and go on my way.

I'm so glad we all have each other for inspiration in various ways....each of us is at a different place on the way to self-acceptance, and hopefully we can all continue to benefit from each other in the ways we need it most. I know I have, and continue to!


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## ThatFatGirl (May 22, 2006)

I'm meeting my boyfriend in Chicago (well, Wheeling, IL) this weekend for a bbw bash and I'm really excited about some of the clothing I bought for the trip. I'm pretty much going to bare arms all weekend... all three new tops are sleeveless. This is a HUGE deal for me...

I found the perfect black surplice top with a great deep v-neck and sequined flower trim at Fashion Bug (that actually fit my fat self) to wear with my new HolyClothing.com (see the clothing and fashion board) seniorita skirt, the same top in green to wear with jeans, and then a long, black flouncy layered sheer cami tie-back sort of top to wear with jeans from zaftique.com... they're all sleeveless. If I can't go sleeveless and by comfortable about it at a bbw bash around a bunch of other fat women, where else am I going to be comfortable?


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## AnnMarie (May 22, 2006)

JoyJoy said:


> Women like Ann Marie and Heather inspired me to the point that I decided to stop sitting on the sidelines and take the plunge, faking it much of the time.



Awww, that's so nice. *sniff*


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## MisticalMisty (May 22, 2006)

ThatFatGirl said:


> If I can't go sleeveless and by comfortable about it at a bbw bash around a bunch of other fat women, where else am I going to be comfortable?


That's why I'm doing the bikini in Vegas..I won't be the only one..LOL


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## AnnMarie (May 22, 2006)

ThatFatGirl said:


> I'm meeting my boyfriend in Chicago (well, Wheeling, IL) this weekend for a bbw bash and I'm really excited about some of the clothing I bought for the trip. I'm pretty much going to bare arms all weekend... all three new tops are sleeveless. This is a HUGE deal for me...
> 
> I found the perfect black surplice top with a great deep v-neck and sequined flower trim at Fashion Bug (that actually fit my fat self) to wear with my new HolyClothing.com (see the clothing and fashion board) seniorita skirt, the same top in green to wear with jeans, and then a long, black flouncy layered sheer cami tie-back sort of top to wear with jeans from zaftique.com... they're all sleeveless. If I can't go sleeveless and by comfortable about it at a bbw bash around a bunch of other fat women, where else am I going to be comfortable?



I'm very excited for you and your soon to be bare arms.... I think you're going to find it very liberating, and it only takes a small taste of that to make the full turn. Trust me.


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## JoyJoy (May 22, 2006)

AnnMarie said:


> Awww, that's so nice. *sniff*


 
Just the truth, Ruth...err...AnnMarie. I don't think you know how much I watched you that weekend at the Memorial Day Bash back in 2000 (stalker??). I was so impressed with how you carried yourself, how confident you were, etc, and I continue to be impressed by you. So...thanks for being such a great Fat Girl! 

On the flight home from that weekend, I wore short shorts, and the Heavenly Bodies tank top I got at the bash...and I got lots of looks in the airport, good and bad...and held my head up the entire time. 
Perfect example of faking it, because I was shaking inside. :shocked:


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## JoyJoy (May 22, 2006)

MisticalMisty said:


> That's why I'm doing the bikini in Vegas..I won't be the only one..LOL


 
Misty, I think we should wear our bikinis on the trip and hang out the windows along the way. I bet we'd get some more takers to come along and help with the gas if we did!


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## missaf (May 22, 2006)

It's just SO synergistic to see people say "AM and Heather inspired me to be more open and honest with myself and wear things I'd never dream to wear before!" Then we hear AM say "I'm learning to do x, y, z" and we get to be a part of their self confidence building.

I Love it!


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## MisticalMisty (May 22, 2006)

JoyJoy said:


> Misty, I think we should wear our bikinis on the trip and hang out the windows along the way. I bet we'd get some more takers to come along and help with the gas if we did!


Bug windows are big..but I'm not sure they're big enough for me to hang out of..lol

I'm all for wearing my bikini while driving EXCEPT..I've got leather seats..ouch..lol

we'll have to put some towels down or something


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## JoyJoy (May 22, 2006)

MisticalMisty said:


> Bug windows are big..but I'm not sure they're big enough for me to hang out of..lol
> 
> I'm all for wearing my bikini while driving EXCEPT..I've got leather seats..ouch..lol
> 
> we'll have to put some towels down or something


 
I've been having *Vegas moments* all day....63 days!


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## TheSadeianLinguist (May 22, 2006)

It's funny. I was getting dressed for work, and finally, I can fit into my "fat" high school clothes. Being low on clean laundry (always am before my days off), I slipped them on. It's amazing how clearly I was trying not to be noticed when it comes to looking at my clothes. DARK colors, long sleeves, baggy form. Crazy. I brightened up the navy shirt and black cargos with a piece of pretty blue bubble glass.


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## fatlane (May 22, 2006)

JoyJoy said:


> Misty, I think we should wear our bikinis on the trip and hang out the windows along the way. I bet we'd get some more takers to come along and help with the gas if we did!



post pics plz tanx


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## NFA (May 23, 2006)

I'm actually reminded of the Big Moves dance revue I saw last weekend. Some of the dancers wore outfits that might be called confrontationally conventional. Some of the hip-hop numbers, for instance, featured outfits that are quite common in the genre but are downright revolutionary when the context is adapted. One dancer was especially daring and wore what was essentially a sports bra and a mini-skirt with her ample belly very much asserting itself. No one would bat an eye if a dance team at a basketball game featured a similiar outfit, but here it was an unmistakable political statement. While nothing else was quite so dramatic, the other dancers donned costumes which were also daringly appropriate for the genre. There were no concessions to their bodies when displaying their style. 

Its a shame that its the case, but in our culture such decisions have an element of revolution to them. While in many ways, fat bodies demand new forms of expression inconcievable to mainstream expectations of thinness, in other ways there is much to be said for staking a claim on our cultural language and making it a part of our self-expression. A deciding factor in one's self-expression should never be the scorn of others of the scorn self-directed. While we can expand our horizons beyond clothing designed with thin bodies in mind, that doesn't mean any such clothing or concepts should be withheld from the fat body. Especially those with genuine practical advantages like shorts and sleeveless shirts. Self-expression cannot thrive from a position of limits and exclusions.

No, unlearning cultural fear of dressing in things one is "not supposed to", will not come in an instant. But as others have said, there is a value to faking it. To just taking the chance with all of ones committment even if not yet with all their sentiment. Wearing a tank-top can be a political act in its own way. "Liberating" is a very appropriate way of putting it. Its not a step everyone wants to take, but its still very much worthwhile.


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## LillyBBBW (May 23, 2006)

fatgirl33 said:


> Lilly, you have the sexiest arms! :smitten: You should show them off!
> 
> (Easy for me to say, someone who refuses to wear shorts!  )
> 
> Brenda



There are these two sleeveless shirts at zaftique that I am so in love with. I am tempted to buy them but the last time I took that leap the tops never saw the light of day. I have a drawer full of tanks that I never wear. (Most of them are too small now though  )

Thanks Brenda!


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## JoyJoy (May 23, 2006)

fatlane said:


> post pics plz tanx


 
Only if we get someone to ride with us....kinda tough to take pics hanging out a car window!


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## jamie (May 24, 2006)

I have overcome most things. I wear sleeveless shirts all the time. I figure they can see how fat my arms are through the way they are squished in the fabric any how. I gave up the too long too big shirts and pants because I realized that they were making me look completely shapeless and I got one heck of a bum..it should be shown. .

The only problem is I cannot imagine showing anything above the knee. I like my legs, I don't mind that they are fat... but I have so many rolls I look like a melting candle through the thigh area. I love them...but I feel like I am subjecting the world to just too much exposure. I wear jeans, khakis and longish skirts, and so far that has worked out ok.


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## jamie (May 24, 2006)

I have overcome most things. I wear sleeveless shirts all the time. I figure they can see how fat my arms are through the way they are squished in the fabric any how. I gave up the too long too big shirts and pants because I realized that they were making me look completely shapeless and I got one heck of a bum..it should be shown. .

The only problem is I cannot imagine showing anything above the knee. I like my legs, I don't mind that they are fat... but I have so many rolls I look like a melting candle through the thigh area. I love them...but I feel like I am subjecting the world to just too much exposure. Even at the pool, I feel naked when I have to drop my towel from the waist. I wear jeans, khakis and longish skirts, and so far that has worked out ok.


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## MisticalMisty (Jun 29, 2006)

Here are a few new pics of my cute arms..LOL

View attachment 7366


View attachment 7367


View attachment 7368




YAY! for fat arms


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## MisticalMisty (Jun 30, 2006)

Forgive me..I forgot to post the one that shows arms and legs..LOL..damnit


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## PrettyFatGirl4U (Jun 30, 2006)

LillyBBBW said:


> I had a major gig today and wore a sleeveless floor length gown. I wore a burnout velvet duster over it so no one could see my arms however I did take the duster off when I got in the car, drove away and waved goodbye to all the musicians in the parking lot with my arms and shoulders exposed. I drove the entire way like that.
> 
> Baby steps.



Good for you Lilly! And all you other ladies becoming emancipated (and cooler!)fat girls 

I'm an ssbbw with truly *enormous* upper arms and I've been sleeveless for years. I figure someone who's life is so small that seeing my fat arms causes them emotional trauma, they are someone more to be pitied than feared. And the thing is, when I wear longer sleeves, no one EVER comes up to me to tell me how slender my hamhock arms look suddenly  I figure I can be hot and miserable with very fat arms or cool and comfy with very fat arms....I choose cool and comfy!

Now short skirts are another story, I don't wear em cause I have some scars I'd rather not display nor darken by exposing them to the sun. If I lived in a place conducive to weaing opaque tights I would absolutely do a short skirt but as I'm a Florida girl the mere thought of it makes me almost suicidal 

Wear what makes you feel good at any size, it's more about confidence and attitude than anything really and once you do and see that the world doesn't implode, you'll never look back!


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## EbonySSBBW (Jun 30, 2006)

MisticalMisty said:


> Forgive me..I forgot to post the one that shows arms and legs..LOL..damnit



That is a cute outfit, Misty. I love that skirt! Very sexy.


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## PrettyFatGirl4U (Jun 30, 2006)

Jes said:


> Thing is, bra straps showing are the absolute fashion and have been for the last ... at least 3 years now. The 'rule' is: just have a bra that's an obviously different color from what you're wearing so that it looks intentional.


Sarah Jessica Parker in Sex in the City made the bra as part of the outfit fashionable! She sometimes wore outfits that were backless or low cut in back and wore a regular bra with all the "hardware" there for the world to see!

The whole bra showing is a bit much for me but as Sandie said, as long as it's clean, what's a little bra strap?


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## Roxanna (Jun 30, 2006)

*"That's the thing. You think the entire world is centered around your fat or any other "flaw". But this isn't true."*

Im sorry, but I have to call you out on that one. Im so glad your day went well and thats brilliant :wubu: But if I were to wear anything even 'remotly' reveiling out of the house, here in New Zealand, I would actualy fear for my life from the things that would be thrown from passing car loads of idiotic litteeel boys.
I wish to have such freedom, I would like the _option_ to wear a skirt in public, hell, I would like to have the _option_ to leave my house for once!! Thanks to years of bullying and bullshit from this town, I just dont leave my house anymore, its not worth the head-hastle. I cant move btw, incase you were thinking of suggesting that. Ive tried for 10 years to get help for my mental stuff as well, incase you were thinking of suggesting that. Argh, now im just ranting about how much this stupid place/peoples suck, sorry, ive gone compleatly off on a tangent now


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## LillyBBBW (Jun 30, 2006)

MisticalMisty said:


> Forgive me..I forgot to post the one that shows arms and legs..LOL..damnit



Misty, you look fantastic! You're such a beautiful woman.


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## Jes (Jun 30, 2006)

Agreed. You're a good looking group of people! And I'm glad you dressed to the occasion, too.

M, is your hair naturally curly like that or did you work it a bit?


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## jamie (Jun 30, 2006)

Misty, you look beautiful and that is one kick ass outfit. Cute legs


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## Ceres (Jun 30, 2006)

hello friends...well..after few months idling i am back...i wasn't in mood of doing anything...anyway....you know....i didnt wear skirts for a couple of decades,and if i did it was long skirts,feet lenght(not even ankle lenght)..no shorts,no miniskirts..because when i was 17 i had a serious accident that left me with a limp and a huge scar on my ankle(exposed fracture)..my ankle is swollen all the time and is not really pretty to look at....in fact for several months i tried to avoid to look at it myself...but hey...need to shower and go to washroom...so...lol...i had to look at it!i thought i was unattractive and noone will look at me or ask me out..add to that i was never skinny..and right now i weight 243 lbs(lost 17 pounds in a month)when the pic here was taken i was 230 lbs already...so combining the 2 elements above....well..you understand why i didnt like to wear anything revealing my legs...until i met my actual husband...and now i wear shorts,minis,and i got my self a cute bikini james bond girl style..and my hubby drools everytime i wear something cute and sexy in public...well...he drools even if i am wearing a garbage bag....lol...and i found out that quite a bit of men when i pass by check me out,my ass or my cleavage if i wear a low cut shirt...this said...we have just 1 life....do we really want to spend it prisoner of what peoples think?do we really wanna spend it afraid that others will judge us?i carry myself around knowing i am me...and if you don't like me....well...do i really care????i have a wonderful husband,wonderful friends,few (not so)hidden admirers..and kick me if i give a sh*t about what other thinks of me...i can't run,and for many years i thought i couldn't dance...then i found if my heart want to dance...well my feet have to follow...so now i dance..i look at life with smiling eyes...i know i fought a battle,i know i won..my handicap didn't stop me and didn't take away my dignity of woman..so dear friends....look in the mirror...see?that is who you are,that is the body that the Eternal gave us....and they make miniskirts in our size...so...why don't wear it???? 
walk your head high,your body straight,and be aware there is only 1 you in this Earth...the Eternal made you at his image...so do not be ashamed of carrying yourself around,because HE wasn't ashamed of how he made you....
Ceres


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## Mercedes (Jun 30, 2006)

Not fair that we leave them out of this nice thread, is it?

Well, I find BHM's most sexy when they wear sleevless top which is like a net.

Because their moobs and belly shows jiggling... yet doesn't show all - and that drives me crazy!:eat2:


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## MisticalMisty (Jun 30, 2006)

EbonySSBBW said:


> That is a cute outfit, Misty. I love that skirt! Very sexy.


Thank you  I call it my salsa skirt..I wear it all the time..lol I seriously need another one..but can't even imagine not having that one in my wardrobe..that and the shirt are the best things I've ever bought at LB!


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## MisticalMisty (Jun 30, 2006)

LillyBBBW said:


> Misty, you look fantastic! You're such a beautiful woman.


Thank you so much..I really appreciate it..I felt really great that night too..that's always a good feeling..when you know you look good and you feel good too


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## MisticalMisty (Jun 30, 2006)

Jes said:


> Agreed. You're a good looking group of people! And I'm glad you dressed to the occasion, too.
> 
> M, is your hair naturally curly like that or did you work it a bit?


My hairdresser worked it a bit..I didn't like it at first..it was a little big..lol..but luckily it calmed down a bit 

Thanks chica!


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## MisticalMisty (Jun 30, 2006)

jamie said:


> Misty, you look beautiful and that is one kick ass outfit. Cute legs


Thanks..I love my legs..you'll never catch this fat girl not showing them off..lol..unless it's cold outside


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## Mercedes (Jun 30, 2006)

Misty, you were the girl most elegantly dressed in the group there! The cut of the skirt is great and the whole outfit is very flattering! Great job!


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## Jack Skellington (Jun 30, 2006)

fatlane said:


> Should I shave my legs, though? I mean, will it make that much of a difference on a guy?



For a Kilt? No. For a skirt, shave and tuck.

I totally deserve rep for this from you FL, you stingy bastard.


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## Jes (Jun 30, 2006)

MisticalMisty said:


> My hairdresser worked it a bit..I didn't like it at first..it was a little big..lol..but luckily it calmed down a bit
> 
> Thanks chica!


i really like it a lot--and if my hair curled like that or close to it, i might go much shorter. it's just that you get the curl you get, not the one you want.


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## MisticalMisty (Jun 30, 2006)

Mercedes said:


> Misty, you were the girl most elegantly dressed in the group there! The cut of the skirt is great and the whole outfit is very flattering! Great job!


Thank you  I appreciate it.


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## MisticalMisty (Jun 30, 2006)

Jes said:


> i really like it a lot--and if my hair curled like that or close to it, i might go much shorter. it's just that you get the curl you get, not the one you want.


I've had my hair curly at all lengths..gotta love hot rollers! LOL>.here are a few more pics of it curlyView attachment 7379


View attachment 7380



My hair, as I've gotten older, as gotten much thiner and finer..so the only way to get it to have some volume is to curl it..and to do that..it has to have a ton of gunk in it first..LOL

You should try it..just curling the ends..I used to do that..then pull it half up with a clip..it looks really pretty and will look like you have cascading curls!

GO FOR IT! lol..and post pics!


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## BBWMoon (Jun 30, 2006)

Great Pics, Misty!

I wish I could use Hot Rollers, but my hair is baby fine and the curls
immediately fall out.

And perms burn my hair.

Your hair is really pretty!


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## Mercedes (Jun 30, 2006)

The colour of the hair is very beautiful too.

I love that colour, but it just doesn't suit my complexion!


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## MisticalMisty (Jun 30, 2006)

BBWMoon said:


> Great Pics, Misty!
> 
> I wish I could use Hot Rollers, but my hair is baby fine and the curls
> immediately fall out.
> ...


I'm telling you..mine is really fine too..I usually blow dry it with gel and mousse and then add a ton of volumizing cream on top of it..and finish it off with hairspray..LOL..I wish it was as easy as it was when I was younger..I could curl it and it would last for days.


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## GWARrior (Jun 30, 2006)

I WANNA SEE MEN IN KILTS!!!!! *drool*


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## SensualSSBBWCurves (Jun 30, 2006)

I really am glad to have read this today.
First of all after a long day of shopping, and I found abosutely nothing that, I felt comfortable wearing, so I brought nothing. However, I do have a short skirt and I have been putting off wearing it for quite sometime, but after reading this, I might trying wearing it out the house even its just to check the mailbox....at least it's a start some where.


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## out.of.habit (Jul 10, 2006)

What an inspiring bunch of posts! I have been avoiding tank tops and form-fitting clothing for some time now... I tend to have phases when I think it's ok, and phases when I wouldn't dream of it.

Sometimes change is loud and scary, and totally worth it.
Here's to taking one step outside of my comfort zone. I'll let you know how it goes.


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## out.of.habit (Jul 10, 2006)

SensualSSBBWCurves said:


> I really am glad to have read this today.
> First of all after a long day of shopping, and I found abosutely nothing that, I felt comfortable wearing, so I brought nothing. However, I do have a short skirt and I have been putting off wearing it for quite sometime, but after reading this, I might trying wearing it out the house even its just to check the mailbox....at least it's a start some where.



I know exactly what you're saying here. Absolutely. A fruitless shopping trip is frustrating and exhausting. I might go buy a tank top tomorrow like I mean it. Who knows, I just might wear it out where someone might see me! lol

I mean, hell, they're just arms right? I'm not fooling anybody with my sleeves! ("Ha ha, look ma, no arms!")


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## DangerousCurves (Jul 10, 2006)

I've really enjoyed this thread. I kind of had the notion that almost all of the women on this site are proud and like to show off all of their curves, and I definitely don't like to wear clothes that are really formfitting. I'm a little glad to know that even women here have their little insecurities, but it's even better to see that we can encourage each other to get over them... Thanks!


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## AnnMarie (Jul 11, 2006)

Whelp, heading into my last demon... wearing crops today. (Not because I feel pressure to, either. Simply because they're REALLY cute pants, and they don't come in full length - bastards!!!)

We'll see how I do.


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## MisticalMisty (Jul 11, 2006)

AnnMarie said:


> Whelp, heading into my last demon... wearing crops today. (Not because I feel pressure to, either. Simply because they're REALLY cute pants, and they don't come in full length - bastards!!!)
> 
> We'll see how I do.


Good luck 

I wear crops and shorts and all that..simply because I'm comfortable and if you don't wanna see my legs don't look..lol..

you've got great gams..have fun in them


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## truth38 (Jul 12, 2006)

Ok,
I never show my arms but this summer i would like to wear one of those cute sexy Marilyn Monroe dresses so, I decided to decorate my arms with arm bangles and yes, another mystic tattoo. Hey, if they are going to stare they might as well see a work of art, maybe a dragon or something.


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## dragorat (Jul 12, 2006)

*You ladies are not the only ones who have or have had some of these problems.When I was younger & a bit lighter,I was always told by my Grandmother I was too BIG to wear shorts!Finally I was given some shorts from a friend of the family that he no longer wore.I tried them on just out of curiosity & they fit fine.At 1st when I wore them I was in a state of rebellion but as time has gone on I happen to like how I look in shorts & feel very comfortable going out in them.
*


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## Rainahblue (Jul 16, 2006)

MissToodles said:


> About a month ago, I wore a short skirt in public. I thought that the sight of my dimpled thighs and chubby knees would horrify everyone. I did catch a few glances but all in all no one really cared...
> 
> That's the thing. You think the entire world is centered around your fat or any other "flaw". But this isn't true. You walk through life being invisible, only noticed when detractors or admirers cross your path.
> 
> ...



I finally did it and wore a tubetop!  Gasp! 
Wearing one was definitely waaaay outside of my comfort zone since I'm not entirely fond of showing off my arms in public. I really tested myself and wore it to the mall, a place I usually avoid. 
 I'm glad I did it too! 
It's too hot for sleeves these days...





edited to add a pic!​


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## AnnMarie (Jul 16, 2006)

Rainahblue said:


> I finally did it and wore a tubetop!  Gasp!
> Wearing one was definitely waaaay outside of my comfort zone since I'm not entirely fond of showing off my arms in public. I really tested myself and wore it to the mall, a place I usually avoid.
> I'm glad I did it too!
> It's too hot for sleeves these days...
> ...



Congrats!!!!!  Very bold move, the tube top....braless and sleeveless!!! 

^5!!


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## ThatFatGirl (Jul 16, 2006)

Rainahblue said:


> I finally did it and wore a tubetop!  Gasp!
> Wearing one was definitely waaaay outside of my comfort zone since I'm not entirely fond of showing off my arms in public. I really tested myself and wore it to the mall, a place I usually avoid.
> I'm glad I did it too!
> It's too hot for sleeves these days...
> ​




You look adorable, Rainah! Congrats on going outside your comfort zone. I've been doing the sleeveless thing here and there this summer and can attest to the feeling of freedom (combined with a lingering feeling of self-consciousness, but I'm working on it) it brings.​


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## out.of.habit (Jul 16, 2006)

Rainahblue said:


> I finally did it and wore a tubetop!  Gasp!
> Wearing one was definitely waaaay outside of my comfort zone since I'm not entirely fond of showing off my arms in public. I really tested myself and wore it to the mall, a place I usually avoid.
> I'm glad I did it too!
> It's too hot for sleeves these days...
> ...




GORGEOUS! Oh my goodness, I love how that looks on you. It really suits you. Congratulations on such beautiful comfort!


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## Tina (Jul 16, 2006)

You looke beautiful, Rainah. The top looks great, you look great in it, and those colors you're wearing reall suit your lovely skin.


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## Esme (Jul 16, 2006)

It's been so hot that I actually took a baby step yesterday and wore a tank top. (I have arm issues) I didn't go anywhere, but I did chat with some neighbors. No one ran in horror... I felt kind of funny about it, but I did it anyway. I'm not sure if I'm ready to go out into the world sleeveless yet, but I'm hoping to get there some day.


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## MisticalMisty (Jul 16, 2006)

Yay for fat girls showing arms.

I bought 2 tube tops at LB the other day..I'm going to venture into the strapless bra no straps on shoulder look in Vegas..Wish me luck..LOL


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## EvilPrincess (Jul 16, 2006)

Esme said:


> It's been so hot that I actually took a baby step yesterday and wore a tank top. (I have arm issues) I didn't go anywhere, but I did chat with some neighbors. No one ran in horror... I felt kind of funny about it, but I did it anyway. I'm not sure if I'm ready to go out into the world sleeveless yet, but I'm hoping to get there some day.


 

Hotter than hot here, and humid humid humid, I started the tank top thing a month or so ago. Progressed to actually wearing sleeveless out of the house. Today I thought I would melt, so I moved onto a sports bra type thing and shorts <okay I admit only in the back yard, but the birds did not seem to mine  > 

When sleeveless in public, I have yet to cause a death!


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## elle camino (Jul 16, 2006)

first off, i love this thread. it's so wonderful to hear other women's little personal journeys towards self acceptance, blah blah mush mush. at any rate:
legs were never my problem. all it took was one of my best friends in seventh grade telling me in an offhand way one day that i had 'pretty legs'. i was like 'killer, that'll be my thing now' (see avatar), and i've been Shorty McSkirt from that day forward. 
my thing has always been my (upper) arms. not that i've ever wished they were _smaller_, necessarily. i've just always wanted them to be...more uniformly round and pretty like that. i do not love my batwings, no matter how hard i try to. PLUS i have this infuriating pigmentation thing going on up there, where the skin is always kind of reddish. bleh. not cute! i figure the only way of getting rid of the redness thing is to finish my half sleeves, which i was planning on doing anyways. overall, i'm not a huge fan.
that all having been said, i'll be goddamned if any silly nitpicky insecurity i have is going to stop me from being comfortable when it's warm out, or wearing a pretty dress just because it's sleeveless. just because _I_ stare at my arms in the mirror for several minutes at a time, really not liking what i see, does not mean anyone else i see that day is going to pay them one speck of attention. i mean logically why on earth would they, when my face is only a few inches over, and my (frankly killer) rack is only a couple below? 
that's pretty much the entirety of the thought process that got me out of cardigans in the summer.


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## Rainahblue (Jul 16, 2006)

Thanks *AnnMarie, ThatfatGirl, out.of.habit, & Tina!*
Really, thanks - I don't post a lotta "all of me" pics online.

I should add, I'm also self conscious about skin stuff - I have stretch marks on my upper arms that have been there since I was your average-sized 14-year-old. Like *elle camino*, I thought, anyone who chooses to stare at my stretch marks rather than my boobs or face (or kick-ass 99 cent scarf from Wal-mart) has some serious problems.

Hey *MisticalMisty*, when you do the tubetop thing, show us!  ​


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## fatgirlflyin (Jul 16, 2006)

Rainahblue said:


> I finally did it and wore a tubetop!  Gasp!
> Wearing one was definitely waaaay outside of my comfort zone since I'm not entirely fond of showing off my arms in public. I really tested myself and wore it to the mall, a place I usually avoid.
> I'm glad I did it too!
> It's too hot for sleeves these days...
> ...




Congratulations on overcoming that personal hurdle. I'm a scaredy pants when it comes to wearing shorts or short skirts (if I'm not wearing stockings). 
I'm working on it tho, baby steps with the shorts around the yard and to the gas station the other day...


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## lipmixgirl (Jul 16, 2006)

Rainahblue said:


> edited to add a pic!​


 
yummy... rainahblue, i am so smitten!!!! :wubu:


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## Jes (Jul 17, 2006)

MisticalMisty said:


> Yay for fat girls showing arms.
> 
> I bought 2 tube tops at LB the other day..I'm going to venture into the strapless bra no straps on shoulder look in Vegas..Wish me luck..LOL


Uhm, just based on what you've told US you've bought, you must be living in a van down by the river, now.

haha. Ok. ONly kidding. Just poking fun. But those boyshorts at 10 bucks a pop? who do they think they're kidding??


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## MisticalMisty (Jul 17, 2006)

Jes said:


> Uhm, just based on what you've told US you've bought, you must be living in a van down by the river, now.
> 
> haha. Ok. ONly kidding. Just poking fun. But those boyshorts at 10 bucks a pop? who do they think they're kidding??


I got those boyshorts on sale..lol..plus I had a 30% off coupon..I don't spend that much money on panties EVER chica..LOL

I am almost in the poor house..but that's..cause I make poo look hot * yes I left the r off on a purpose*


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## activistfatgirl (Jul 17, 2006)

lipmixgirl said:


> yummy... rainahblue, i am so smitten!!!! :wubu:



Me too. Lipmixgirl, I challenge you to a DUEL!!! (Maybe a naked one, with oil).


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## Jes (Jul 17, 2006)

activistfatgirl said:


> Me too. Lipmixgirl, I challenge you to a DUEL!!! (Maybe a naked one, with oil).


this place has gone so lesbo recently. i just can't don't know what to do! well other than remove my pants and dance, dance, dance, that is.


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## activistfatgirl (Jul 17, 2006)

Jes said:


> this place has gone so lesbo recently. i just can't don't know what to do! well other than remove my pants and dance, dance, dance, that is.



I laughed until I cried. Big, fat, wet tears of joy and happiness.


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## Rainahblue (Jul 17, 2006)

activistfatgirl said:


> Me too. Lipmixgirl, I challenge you to a DUEL!!! (Maybe a naked one, with oil).



Yeah! A duel!
I think you guys should go for it!
Defend your honor!
Spread that oil into every crevice!
and...
Post pics plz thx! ​


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## mrskeet (Aug 5, 2006)

AnnMarie said:


> I overcame the sleeves thing years ago, and have never been so happy to have all of my shirt choices open up.... I love it.
> 
> But I can't get past the capri/skirts thing. I can wear them at our events sometimes, but never ever anywhere else. I think since my legs are just beyond fat, they're downright ODD (ankles) compared to anyone else's... I just can't get over it, and the looks just aren't worth the reward to me.
> 
> ...


Ann Marie your thighs are fine to me your the bomb!!!!!!


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## Twinkie (Aug 5, 2006)

I was out with a girlfriend recently and at a light, there was this woman crossing in front of us who was quite large and had a very short, cleavage revealing dress on. My friend was horrified that this woman would go out in public like this and I thought it was awesome that she was so comfortable with herself that she was so "out there". I have to say that if the woman were thin, I doubt a word would have been said. Needless to say, I'm rethinking this friendship


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## Rainahblue (Aug 5, 2006)

Twinkie said:


> I was out with a girlfriend recently and at a light, there was this woman crossing in front of us who was quite large and had a very short, cleavage revealing dress on. My friend was horrified that this woman would go out in public like this and I thought it was awesome that she was so comfortable with herself that she was so "out there". I have to say that if the woman were thin, I doubt a word would have been said. Needless to say, I'm rethinking this friendship



I'm sorry what?
:eat2: 
Your avatar... so... yummy... can't concentrate...​


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## Twinkie (Aug 5, 2006)

Rainahblue said:


> I'm sorry what?
> :eat2:
> Your avatar... so... yummy... can't concentrate...​




Rainablue, LOL  Yes, that's me.... spongy on the outside with a creamy inside


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## MisticalMisty (Aug 5, 2006)

Here's my no sleeve pic! lol


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## MissToodles (Aug 5, 2006)

Misty, I love the top you lil' vixen you !


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## MisticalMisty (Aug 5, 2006)

MissToodles said:


> Misty, I love the top you lil' vixen you !


 who me? *looks innocent* Honestly, I dressed very sexy in Vegas..I'm not sure how comfortable I am with wearing something like that here..just because I'm a teacher in such a small town..but I love showing off my body....I need to move I think..lol


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## AnnMarie (Aug 5, 2006)

mrskeet said:


> Ann Marie your thighs are fine to me your the bomb!!!!!!




Thanks very much.


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## Renaissance Woman (Aug 5, 2006)

Today I went out in public wearing my clingy capris that hug my tummy, butt, and thighs. Every other time I've worn them, I've put on a long top that covers all that, but today I didn't, so it was visible for the world to see. It seems like such a small thing when I type it, but it's a huge thing for me, and I have the confidence boost from the boards to thank.

I admit I still put a long-sleeved shirt on over my tank top to hide the arms, but baby steps, right?


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## Renaissance Woman (Aug 5, 2006)

Rainah, you look so cute! Someday I hope I'll be as brave as you to not only wear the tubetop, but to post a picture as well!



Rainahblue said:


> I finally did it and wore a tubetop!  Gasp!
> Wearing one was definitely waaaay outside of my comfort zone since I'm not entirely fond of showing off my arms in public. I really tested myself and wore it to the mall, a place I usually avoid.
> I'm glad I did it too!
> It's too hot for sleeves these days...
> <pic taken out for size>​


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## Carrie (Aug 5, 2006)

Renaissance Woman said:


> I admit I still put a long-sleeved shirt on over my tank top to hide the arms, but baby steps, right?



Yay, Barb! Exactly - it's all about baby steps. A little over a year ago I refused to wear shorts in public, and a sleeveless top was completely out of the question. Now I find myself packing and prepping for the NAAFA convention next week, and 90% of the tops I'm taking are sleeveless, and I'm actually _shortening_ some of my skirts. 

Baby steps indeed.


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## Jes (Aug 6, 2006)

Everyone....I don't know why I'm standing up in this room full of people drinking bad coffee, smoking and talking about 12 steps, but I attended Shakespeare in the Park tonight with my friend Darin and about 550 of my closest neighbors. And I, Jes, wore shorts for the first time in about 10 years (in my neighborhood; I always wear them when I'm in upstate NY). THe odd thing is, I didn't care. I couldn't have cared less. So I wonder if maybe I just don't wear them b/c I only have 1 decent pair, or b/c my capris aren't usually in the laundry basket, as they were tonight, but when I decided to wear them, I thought: how will this be? I'm a fattie mcfatterstein. Well, it's WestPhilly. If you're not a blue-haired granola lesbian or a homeless person pooping next to the stage (it IS shakespeare in the park), no one notices you. Ok, no one noticed the blue haired lesbian either, really (save me, and only b/c her blue hair was between me and the stage!)


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## fatgirlflyin (Aug 6, 2006)

Jes said:


> Everyone....I don't know why I'm standing up in this room full of people drinking bad coffee, smoking and talking about 12 steps, but I attended Shakespeare in the Park tonight with my friend Darin and about 550 of my closest neighbors. And I, Jes, wore shorts for the first time in about 10 years (in my neighborhood; I always wear them when I'm in upstate NY). THe odd thing is, I didn't care. I couldn't have cared less. So I wonder if maybe I just don't wear them b/c I only have 1 decent pair, or b/c my capris aren't usually in the laundry basket, as they were tonight, but when I decided to wear them, I thought: how will this be? I'm a fattie mcfatterstein. Well, it's WestPhilly. If you're not a blue-haired granola lesbian or a homeless person pooping next to the stage (it IS shakespeare in the park), no one notices you. Ok, no one noticed the blue haired lesbian either, really (save me, and only b/c her blue hair was between me and the stage!)



I wore shorts the entire time I was in Vegas, that was very new for me. I also thought I'd be stared at but I didn't once see anyone give me any dirty or wierd looks.


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## Jes (Aug 6, 2006)

Ella Bella said:


> I wore shorts the entire time I was in Vegas, that was very new for me. I also thought I'd be stared at but I didn't once see anyone give me any dirty or wierd looks.


i would imagine vegas is a very fat-forgiving place (maybe the most FF place in the US, other than Graceland), certainly for someone at your size.


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## fatgirlflyin (Aug 6, 2006)

lol I'm a pretty big girl, in most of the places I went I was the biggest girl there. I'd love to visit Graceland


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## Jes (Aug 6, 2006)

Yeah, you gotta go to Graceland. A pilgrimage all Americans must make. I did it during grad school the first time, the year the Mississippi flooded and highways were barely passable. 

But behave yourself while there. I actually...got kicked out of Graceland. it can happen.


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## missaf (Aug 6, 2006)

I wore a short short sleeve shirt with a square-low-cut bodice that was quite form fitting yesterday to Disneyland. It was cool, I got a tan, and it was quite the eye candy, if I do say so myself. *I* had a good view of the girls, so he must have to, since he's taller


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## Jes (Aug 6, 2006)

all right, so what's the update here, missy?


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## Moonchild (Aug 7, 2006)

"You're not supposed to wear that!"

My mom told me that when I tried on her bra.


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## fatgirlflyin (Aug 7, 2006)

Moonchild said:


> "You're not supposed to wear that!"
> 
> My mom told me that when I tried on her bra.



The question that's begging to be asked here is, do you still wear a bra?


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