# What is making you SAD right now...



## Uriel

I'm not sure if there is a Sad thread, but I just looked through 5 pages, with no result.

Me: I just saw (On the news) that they found that 8-year old girl Sandra Cantu, stuffed in a suitcase and thrown in a pond. I didn't know her, and Tracey (Her home) is just one of those places along the Highway here you stop for gas, and never consider those who live there. I've been hoping and praying (And I'm not Religious, but what the heck) that, for once, they would find the child, not dead, not raped...just once a kid just got lost, you know?

I'm sitting here, crying my eyes out for this beautiful little girl who will never have the chance to know the thrill of a first kiss, or the pride of her first paycheck, or graduating from College, or having a baby of her own.


http://abcnews.go.com/US/story?id=7275611&page=1



Fuck, as I am sitting here, with the Today Show on, that poor girl in New York who was raped a few years ago, where the conductor in a train, and the attendant saw, but didn't rush to her aid...just came on the show, telling
her story.


Anyways, yeah, I'm sad, it'll pass for me, and I can rest a little easier, knowing that when they find the sick fuck who snuffed out this child's just-lit flame of life, that this is California, and we have the Death Penalty for shit like this. Although, with what happens when a Prison Population finds out about child molesters/murderers...maybe he/she/they will just get Life, though I think it will be a short one.

Fuck, I'm crying again.

Rest In Peace Sandra


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## mergirl

gah.. thats just horrible and so sad.


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## steely

For the soldier who survived an ambush in Iraq,the only survivor.Two non-humans killed his dog.I can't call them people,young men.They had also been killing random dogs in the neighborhood"just for fun".

Now this soldier has lost his best friend and his service animal.

The heavens should weep for the loss of innocent life,human or animal.


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## cinnamitch

yep just makes you stop and think about all the whining going on about petty things in life, when this is a child who will not even get that chance to complain about petty things. 

Sometimes no matter how much you don't want to admit it, the world can be a totally sucking place and there are just some really evil people who just make you rethink humanity, and i hate that.


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## BigBawdyDame

I'm sad and distrubed that I can't seem to get over a man I've been dating for only two months. We got along incredibly, physically and mentally. But we wanted different things emotionally. I ended it this past Wednesday, but I feel like I'm drowning. I know I'm mourning, but I absolutely hate feeling like this. I wish I could either not think about him or think of him and not feel soul wrenching pain. My friends have all told me they never liked him. Not helping! lol I feel alone and so very, very sad. It doesn't help that he's already back on the web site which we met through looking for my replacement. Do men really move on that quickly?


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## mossystate

Today is the anniversary of my Mom's death. Sad, mixed with remembering what I loved about her.


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## Violet_Beauregard

I'm sorry you're feeling sad... may your mother rest in peace. It's good to remember what you loved about her. Thank goodness for those great memories. 



mossystate said:


> Today is the anniversary of my Mom's death. Sad, mixed with remembering what I loved about her.


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## TraciJo67

mossystate said:


> Today is the anniversary of my Mom's death. Sad, mixed with remembering what I loved about her.



Hugs to you ((((((( Mossy ))))))))


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## Twilley

Coming home to a cold and empty room...


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## Uriel

A couple of things, but I'm probably better off as things stand.

Oh, and at least they caught someone in that murder or little Sandra, although folks are stunned that it is a woman, and a Sunday School teacher... and not some pervo child predator. Strange fucking World we live in...


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## Zoom

Dim Board said:


> Hello Zoom it appears that you have not posted on our forums in several weeks, why not take a few moments to ask a question, help provide a solution or just engage in a conversation with another member in any one of our forums?


This is saddening. I don't have anything important to say here that hasn't already been said by someone else, and even the board auto-knows it.

Do you REALLY want to hear what actually makes me sad? I somehow doubt that.


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## luscious_lulu

He is running away from me again. He's to afraid to take the chance and is not even going to try. 

Breaks my heart...


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## runningman

Being made redundant and worrying about money is making me sad. 

It also makes me sad that I should get sad over such trivial things in relation to some of the other horrible things mentioned on this thread.


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## JoyJoy

One of our most prominent faculty members was taken off life support this afternoon and died shortly after. He had fallen and hit his head a little over a week ago and neglected to seek medical care right away, and had a bleed two days later, never to recover after surgery. 

I've worked here for almost 4 years, and for the first 3 1/2 years, this man never gave me the time of day. He would stand in my office area, on the other side of a partition and make comments about how unattractive fat people were. At the Division holiday party this year, he struck up a conversation with me and we talked for a good 20 minutes. After that, he would make a point to inquire about me with other staff members, and would stop and say hello before morning rounds as he was getting his coffee and 2 or 3 gumdrops from the jar that one of my office mates would put out for him. His greeting was always "Good morning, Joy...are you making any money for us today?" and we'd joke for a minute or two before he went on his way. I felt a small triumph in the fact that this man, who was known for being gruff and a little surly, and who was obviously size-prejudiced, chose to respect me and seemingly overlook my size once he got to know me a bit. He will be missed.


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## 1300 Class

Rapidly coming to the realisation that I'm a totally incompetant hopeless prat whose wasted four years of their life at uni and can't get a job.


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## TraciJo67

Joy, I remember you talking about him, and I remember thinking that my response to his size-prejudice would have been to come down on him, hard, when he made a remark. You dealt with it in your own way, with dignity, and probably made a lot of headway in actually changing his thinking process. I'm sorry for the loss that your department now faces. 




JoyJoy said:


> One of our most prominent faculty members was taken off life support this afternoon and died shortly after. He had fallen and hit his head a little over a week ago and neglected to seek medical care right away, and had a bleed two days later, never to recover after surgery.
> 
> I've worked here for almost 4 years, and for the first 3 1/2 years, this man never gave me the time of day. He would stand in my office area, on the other side of a partition and make comments about how unattractive fat people were. At the Division holiday party this year, he struck up a conversation with me and we talked for a good 20 minutes. After that, he would make a point to inquire about me with other staff members, and would stop and say hello before morning rounds as he was getting his coffee and 2 or 3 gumdrops from the jar that one of my office mates would put out for him. His greeting was always "Good morning, Joy...are you making any money for us today?" and we'd joke for a minute or two before he went on his way. I felt a small triumph in the fact that this man, who was known for being gruff and a little surly, and who was obviously size-prejudiced, chose to respect me and seemingly overlook my size once he got to know me a bit. He will be missed.


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## Wayne_Zitkus

I haven't said anything about this yet here on Dims, but here goes.

Out of the blue, I was laid off last Tuesday. I'm 56 years old, and job hunting again. I had hoped to retire from that company in another decade or so....


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## 1300 Class

Don't you get at least notice Wayne? Are entitlements/pensions and stuff secure? I mean thats fucken' rough.


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## TraciJo67

Wayne_Zitkus said:


> I haven't said anything about this yet here on Dims, but here goes.
> 
> Out of the blue, I was laid off last Tuesday. I'm 56 years old, and job hunting again. I had hoped to retire from that company in another decade or so....



I'm sorry to hear that, Wayne. I hope that you got a decent severance package, and that you find another job soon.


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## HDANGEL15

Australian Lord said:


> Rapidly coming to the realisation that I'm a totally incompetant hopeless prat whose wasted four years of their life at uni and can't get a job.



*AL..if you were at uni for four years, I highly doubt that you are INCOMPETENT!! I have no idea what the job market is like in AU, but I waited over 8 months to settle for jobs paying less then 1/2 of what I was earlier...I am working 2 jobs paying an embarrassing hourly rate (for my years of experience) but I am very grateful to at last have not 1, but 2 jobs to get up in the morning for, and thirdly I house sit / dog walk also, which is MUCH more fun!!!*


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## SamanthaNY

Wayne_Zitkus said:


> I haven't said anything about this yet here on Dims, but here goes.
> 
> Out of the blue, I was laid off last Tuesday. I'm 56 years old, and job hunting again. I had hoped to retire from that company in another decade or so....


I'm sorry to hear it, truly. It's scary for over-40s (is it more so for over-50s?) to job search in the current climate, but hopefully other employers in your field will recognize your experience and offer some good options.


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## steely

The people who own the property next to mine have sold it and they're cutting down the forest


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## Wayne_Zitkus

Australian Lord said:


> Don't you get at least notice Wayne? Are entitlements/pensions and stuff secure? I mean thats fucken' rough.


No notice at all. About an hour after I got into work, my manager called me into his office and gave me the bad news. They wouldn'e even let me take any of my personal items with me - instead, my mamager escorted me down to HR and our admin packed everything up in my office. Everyone who was laid off had to come back on Friday afternoon to pick up our stuff.

I got one week's pay for every year I had been with the company. That ammounts to two weeks' pay, which they will mail to me next week. No word yet on what's happening with my pension.


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## furious styles

http://dimensionsmagazine.com/forums/showthread.php?t=57076

.


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## 1300 Class

> No notice at all. About an hour after I got into work, my manager called me into his office and gave me the bad news. They wouldn'e even let me take any of my personal items with me - instead, my mamager escorted me down to HR and our admin packed everything up in my office. Everyone who was laid off had to come back on Friday afternoon to pick up our stuff.
> 
> I got one week's pay for every year I had been with the company. That ammounts to two weeks' pay, which they will mail to me next week. No word yet on what's happening with my pension.


Theres not much justice left in the world.


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## Santaclear

Wayne_Zitkus said:


> I haven't said anything about this yet here on Dims, but here goes.
> 
> Out of the blue, I was laid off last Tuesday. I'm 56 years old, and job hunting again. I had hoped to retire from that company in another decade or so....



Damn. I'm sorry to hear that, Wayne.


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## Surlysomething

The movie Seven Pounds. 





i've been pretty down for awhile and seeing this didn't help...but it affected me, just like it was meant to


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## undrcovrbrothr

Migraine headaches that debilitate people and make them hurt... I wish I could take all of that pain away...!  :wubu:


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## Your Plump Princess

I'm Listening to this song I used to listen to for hours on repeat during my parents divorce in '02


And the fact that I wasted $140 on a peice of shit that's going to collect dust for the rest of my life. Minus ONE day... I feel like, 'epic fail'


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## TraciJo67

Surlysomething said:


> The movie Seven Pounds.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> i've been pretty down for awhile and seeing this didn't help...but it affected me, just like it was meant to



It affected me, too. It was two hours of my life that I can't get back


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## Surlysomething

TraciJo67 said:


> It affected me, too. It was two hours of my life that I can't get back




I have to admit, Will Smith broke my heart. His facial expression through most of the movie was so tortured. I'm not even his biggest fan but wow...


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## TraciJo67

Surlysomething said:


> I have to admit, Will Smith broke my heart. His facial expression through most of the movie was so tortured. I'm not even his biggest fan but wow...



Well, I'll give it that. He did a fine acting job, considering that the script was worse than something I'd likely see on a Lifetime Television Movie Marathon (enough holes in it to drive a Mack truck through, for starters). And I'd rather sit through said marathon than watch that tortured drama, or anything like it, ever again. I know ... different strokes, different folks 'n all. Will Smith *is* one of my favorite comedic actors. Problem is, I forgot the "comedic" part when I rented "Seven Pounds".


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## mossystate

Your Plump Princess said:


> And the fact that I wasted $140 on a peice of shit that's going to collect dust for the rest of my life. Minus ONE day... I feel like, 'epic fail'



Didn't you say that your parents bought you the dress? If they did, couldn't you try and be just a little grateful? I know this Prom thing has been a struggle for you, but, since you have decided to go ( no gun to your head ), why not find something positive about the experience. Breathe.


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## TraciJo67

mossystate said:


> Didn't you say that your parents bought you the dress? If they did, couldn't you try and be just a little grateful? I know this Prom thing has been a struggle for you, but, since you have decided to go ( no gun to your head ), why not find something positive about the experience. Breathe.



My prom dress was a thrift store special -- this creeping violet satin thing with puffy sleeves. Had obviously been a bridesmaid's special. Fortunately, I was too young & too thrilled that I had a date for the prom to be embarrassed by the monstrosity that I wore. Unfortunately, there are pictures, and I do occasionally stumble across them ... and cringe  But then I see the sappy, goofy, star-struck smile on my face and I remember to ... breathe  

PP, give it a chance. I think you'll enjoy yourself.


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## HottiMegan

A dear friend of mine lost her baby girl a week before she was due to be born and this friend just finished a family portrait painting with her with them and seeing it just makes me all sad for them. I just wish i could be nearby to give her a big hug.


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## mossystate

TraciJo67 said:


> My prom dress was a thrift store special -- this creeping violet satin thing with puffy sleeves. Had obviously been a bridesmaid's special. Fortunately, I was too young & too thrilled that I had a date for the prom to be embarrassed by the monstrosity that I wore. Unfortunately, there are pictures, and I do occasionally stumble across them ... and cringe  But then I see the sappy, goofy, star-struck smile on my face and I remember to ... breathe



Oh...sure...remind me that I NEVER WENT TO MY PROM!!!!!!!!!




Well, I was asked by a few boys...but...still....I NEVER WENT TO MY PROM!!!!

You know I will need to see a picture of you in that dress. Pretty pleeeeeeease?!?

:happy:


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## TraciJo67

mossystate said:


> Oh...sure...remind me that I NEVER WENT TO MY PROM!!!!!!!!!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Well, I was asked by a few boys...but...still....I NEVER WENT TO MY PROM!!!!
> 
> You know I will need to see a picture of you in that dress. Pretty pleeeeeeease?!?
> 
> :happy:



You couldn't pay me enough to post those pics, Mossy The Thing. 

80's style hideous satin bridesmaid dress - yepper.
80's bubble-wrap permed hairdo -- check.
80's thick spatula coating of makeup, including bright blue eyeshadow and vivid kohl-black eyeliner -- double check
80's style tan tuxedo with black converse tennis shoes worn by my Huckleberry Finn of a date -- triple check

Hmm. On second thought, it is pretty freakin' hilarious. I'll start a new "Post Pics" thread and title it "Prom Disasters". Hopefully, those who are old enough to know what jellybean jackets and parachute pants are ... will contribute 

Oh, and to stay on topic: The return of parachute pants makes me very, very sad.


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## Surlysomething

TraciJo67 said:


> Well, I'll give it that. He did a fine acting job, considering that the script was worse than something I'd likely see on a Lifetime Television Movie Marathon (enough holes in it to drive a Mack truck through, for starters). And I'd rather sit through said marathon than watch that tortured drama, or anything like it, ever again. I know ... different strokes, different folks 'n all. Will Smith *is* one of my favorite comedic actors. Problem is, I forgot the "comedic" part when I rented "Seven Pounds".



The movie wasn't good at all, I agree. But his performance was great.

At least I didn't totally waste my money.


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## missy_blue_eyez

My boyfriend being in Cancun right now, Ive seen him once in the space of 2 months and now he's over there for a friends wedding and when he comes back he's prob gonna have to be confined for a few days before any contact meaning it will be even longer til I see him!


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## bexy

HottiMegan said:


> A dear friend of mine lost her baby girl a week before she was due to be born and this friend just finished a family portrait painting with her with them and seeing it just makes me all sad for them. I just wish i could be nearby to give her a big hug.



This just made me cry....I am so sorry for your friend's loss Megan


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## Tooz

Not hangin' with my hoes


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## undrcovrbrothr

Vengeful people who just can't let people go just out of spite, or are too oblivious to know the difference... killing the happiness of others because they can.


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## Slamaga

I have to share it with you: my grandfather one the side of my step father is dead since one week and I went to the funerals. I felt like disconnecteds for one week and I don't think I went on dims to see what happened. I kinda feel sad now because I knew how much he took me as one of his true little son. He always said he had seven little children, I was include in this seven. I miss him so much.


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## Ruffie

This made me as horse freak and general animal lover feel like crying last night when I saw it on the news.
Police and wildlife officials are investigating the fatal shooting of three wild horses, including a pregnant mare, near Sundre, northwest of Calgary.

The animals were found Tuesday night near the Mountain Aire Lodge motel and campground west of the town, about 500 metres from a mountainside road, the RCMP said Wednesday.

It appears the horses were shot from the road late in the afternoon, police said. Evidence at the scene indicates that the mare went into labour after she was shot, said Bob Henderson, president of the Wild Horses of Alberta Society.

"For the first time in a long time, I actually cried this morning. It hurts your heart when you watch them out there, the way that they are and live out there. They're such a beautiful, magnificent animal, and to see this needless, senseless act just sickens the heart," said Henderson, who visited the scene on Wednesday.

The pregnant mare looked ready to foal within a day or two, Henderson said. A stud, about two to three years old, and a yearling colt were also found dead.

"He suffered a long, agonizing death by the look of the scene," Henderson said of the stud, who was found dead on his back with his legs in the air, tangled in some trees.

The deaths bring the total number of wild horses killed in Alberta to more than 22 over the last four years. The society is offering a $10,000 reward for information on the killings.

Would like to get ahold of these assholes myself!
Ruth


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## kathynoon

The plumber is ripping apart the pipes in my bathroom, and the bill is going up and up and up.


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## Mathias

It's my last day at college and I'm gonna miss all of my friends.


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## Risible

Mathias said:


> It's my last day at college and I'm gonna miss all of my friends.



For the summer, Matt? 'Cause if you're graduating, we need to throw you a (virtual) party!


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## Scorsese86

Please... this can't be true, can it? That man can't be Patrick Swayze? It doesn't look like him at all, but it is him... says the article. I find this to be so sad, I can't describe it. Swayze is, if not a great actor, a very likeable actor, with great presence, and he also starred in two of my all-time favorite movies (_Donnie Darko_ and _Red Dawn_), as well as several very entertaining movies I gladly can watch again. It's so horrible to see how this horrible disease has done to him.


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## Chode McBlob

I got laid off my job and the chance of finding a new one is about the same as winning the lottery. I've been laid off every job I've ever had in my life and they only last a few years at a time. Being an Engineer really sucks because of that. Its a disposable job.


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## undrcovrbrothr

I am all alone in paradise, and yet it is all so empty and sad...


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## Mathias

Risible said:


> For the summer, Matt? 'Cause if you're graduating, we need to throw you a (virtual) party!



I'm going to be a junior. Only halfway done here.


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## Surlysomething

I had a long, hard emotional day and am no longer friends with someone I care about. Tomorrow better be an improvement...


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## BarbBBW

A friend of mine is going away for 4 days!! Not too bad right? But I will miss him!!


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## luscious_lulu

Surlysomething said:


> I had a long, hard emotional day and am no longer friends with someone I care about. Tomorrow better be an improvement...



*hugs* that's always hard.


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## steely

I feel lost, set adrift.


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## Surlysomething

luscious_lulu said:


> *hugs* that's always hard.



Thanks. Live and learn, right? I went and gave myself a little retail therapy to ease the pain.


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## BarbBBW

steely said:


> I feel lost, set adrift.



Steely? whats wrong hunny?? Please call me If you need to talk you have my number!!


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## steely

BarbBBW said:


> Steely? whats wrong hunny?? Please call me If you need to talk you have my number!!



I'm ok  Thanks Barb, sometimes being diabetic just sucks!


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## succubus_dxb

A guy that I had recently started seeing, and REALLY started to care about and see a future with, dropped the bomb that he still has strong feelings for his ex. ouch.


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## chocolate desire

Life is not going as it should and I can't seem to get it on track.


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## luscious_lulu

That my brother has been diagnosed with Leukemia.


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## steely

luscious_lulu said:


> That my brother has been diagnosed with Leukemia.



I'm so sorry.  I will quit feeling sorry for myself immediately.


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## BarbBBW

luscious_lulu said:


> That my brother has been diagnosed with Leukemia.



i am so sorry hun! prayer prayer prayer!!


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## Surlysomething

luscious_lulu said:


> That my brother has been diagnosed with Leukemia.



*big hug* I recently had a 17 yo cousin diagnosed with Hodgkins so I feel you


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## luscious_lulu

steely said:


> I'm so sorry.  I will quit feeling sorry for myself immediately.





BarbBBW said:


> i am so sorry hun! prayer prayer prayer!!





Surlysomething said:


> *big hug* I recently had a 17 yo cousin diagnosed with Hodgkins so I feel you



Thank you. We'll find out over the next few days what stage he's at and what happens next.


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## t3h_n00b

I graduate from college tomorrow and my dad is not alive to see it (he's been gone for 4 years now).

one of my friends was murdered last week a few days after he graduated from college. (http://www.buffalonews.com/opinion/editorials/story/674146.html)

one of my former classmates was murdered 2 weeks ago.
(http://topics.nytimes.com/top/reference/timestopics/people/j/johanna_justinjinich/index.html)

one of my other friends is in jail awaiting trial for murder.
my mom is undergoing chemo therapy because she had stomach cancer (she's making an incredible recovery though, last week she did 6 miles in an AIDS walk).
my grandmother went to the hospital yesterday from complications with her diabetes.

edit-
Even though I have 6 big things that I'm sad about, I couldn't even begin to make a list of the thousands if not millions of things I am thankful for.


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## Zandoz

Just when I thought I was out... they pull me back in......

After months disappointment after disappointment house hunting, culminating with being outbid buy $500 on a house that wife and daughter were in love with, we finally gave up the idea of moving and made peace and plans for staying here. The middle of the week we arranged to have the place painted, and we have our contractor friend working up an estimate for drastic changes necessary for me to be able to stay here (mobility issues).

Yesterday, the missed by $500 dream house came back on the market...the deal must have fallen through. Now everything is up in the air again. 

And to make matters worse, this time it is a quick sale with bids only being accepted through Tuesday...the day work was supposed to start on this place. Now wife and daughter can not agree on what to do, and I'm stuck in the middle again.


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## Bafta1

This is the saddest thread ever. But I guess it shows that no one has it easy; we can take solace in the fact that we aren't alone.

I didn't get a scholarship that I needed in order to study in the US - a life-long dream went up in smoke thanks to the economic situation. I feel frustrated and defeated. I'm utterly sad, very lonely, and so, so lost. I just wish I knew what to do with my life; I wish there were someone who could just point me in the right direction.


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## mossystate

luscious_lulu said:


> That my brother has been diagnosed with Leukemia.



So sorry, lulu. I hope he beats the crap out of that invader.


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## luscious_lulu

mossystate said:


> So sorry, lulu. I hope he beats the crap out of that invader.



thanks........


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## squidge dumpling

being told that my 9 week old pup has a heart murmur, im just hoping and praying my fur baby grows out of it.


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## BarbBBW

squidge dumpling said:


> being told that my 9 week old pup has a heart murmur, im just hoping and praying my fur baby grows out of it.



awww that puppy is adorable!! And heart murmurs are pretty common in animals and humans when they are that young!! So hes got a GREAT future I am sure!!!!


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## undrcovrbrothr

Our CWSP network SUCKS because the freakin antenna can't find the damn SIGNAL!!! The same TIME too... during the evening!!! Sad, ohh yes, very sad indeed.


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## JohnWylde

Hello Renee

Same here for me - things are not working out how I would like at the moment.

But is it lovely to read your comments on here - it does cheer me up a lot to read what you are saying.

Here's hoping things work themselves out as we want soon.

John




chocolate desire said:


> Life is not going as it should and I can't seem to get it on track.


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## Weeze

We had to put my doggie down this morning.
I love everyone here who's helping me get through it, because I honestly don't know how to do it at all. It is so, so, much harder than I ever thought it would be. She was just a massive part of our lives and now she's gone. Fifteen is old for a dog. I know. I knew it was going to happen, but, I wasn't ready for there to be this big hole so soon. I feel so empty. I came home from work tonight, and no one came down the steps to come see me. I want that back, so bad. I don't know how i'm going to make it through this, I really don't.


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## squidge dumpling

krismiss said:


> We had to put my doggie down this morning.
> I love everyone here who's helping me get through it, because I honestly don't know how to do it at all. It is so, so, much harder than I ever thought it would be. She was just a massive part of our lives and now she's gone. Fifteen is old for a dog. I know. I knew it was going to happen, but, I wasn't ready for there to be this big hole so soon. I feel so empty. I came home from work tonight, and no one came down the steps to come see me. I want that back, so bad. I don't know how i'm going to make it through this, I really don't.



Krismiss, I am so sorry to hear of your sad lost, its not easy loosing a beloved pet, as they become part of the family. I had to have my Yorkie put to sleep in Febuary and i miss him everyday, he was 15. I have another Yorkie now and she is 10 weeks old and i love her to bits. She can never replace him but she is helping heal the massive gap that he left behind. Maybe when the time is right for you, you might want to get another dog. Sending you friendly hugs as i know you will need then right now.


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## Shosh

I am so sorry Krismiss. Having to put your doggie down must have been devastating.

xoxo
Shosh


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## Rowan

That my mom comes home from work slamming stuff around and when i ask her what is wrong, apparently it's me. Even though i was home and away from her all night long, i still apparently did stuff wrong. *sigh* Here i was hoping to sleep in on a saturday for a change...but no...woken up at 8 am to all kinds of wicked mean attitude


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## chocolate desire

Krissmiss I am very sorry to hear about your dog.


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## mergirl

krismiss said:


> We had to put my doggie down this morning.
> I love everyone here who's helping me get through it, because I honestly don't know how to do it at all. It is so, so, much harder than I ever thought it would be. She was just a massive part of our lives and now she's gone. Fifteen is old for a dog. I know. I knew it was going to happen, but, I wasn't ready for there to be this big hole so soon. I feel so empty. I came home from work tonight, and no one came down the steps to come see me. I want that back, so bad. I don't know how i'm going to make it through this, I really don't.


I'm so sorry to hear about your dogger. I know it feels empty now but i promise it will get less painful for you. Sending you lots of love. xx


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## luscious_lulu

Rowan said:


> That my mom comes home from work slamming stuff around and when i ask her what is wrong, apparently it's me. Even though i was home and away from her all night long, i still apparently did stuff wrong. *sigh* Here i was hoping to sleep in on a saturday for a change...but no...woken up at 8 am to all kinds of wicked mean attitude



You know it's not you right? You're mom has issues and is taking them all out on you. It's not fair and you deserve better. *hugs*


----------



## OneWickedAngel

krismiss said:


> We had to put my doggie down this morning.
> I love everyone here who's helping me get through it, because I honestly don't know how to do it at all. It is so, so, much harder than I ever thought it would be. She was just a massive part of our lives and now she's gone. Fifteen is old for a dog. I know. I knew it was going to happen, but, I wasn't ready for there to be this big hole so soon. I feel so empty. I came home from work tonight, and no one came down the steps to come see me. I want that back, so bad. I don't know how i'm going to make it through this, I really don't.



Oh honey, I'm so sorry. I know it hurts like hell right now, but it does get a little easier to handle day by day. 



Rowan said:


> That my mom comes home from work slamming stuff around and when i ask her what is wrong, apparently it's me. Even though i was home and away from her all night long, i still apparently did stuff wrong. *sigh* Here i was hoping to sleep in on a saturday for a change...but no...woken up at 8 am to all kinds of wicked mean attitude


Sounds like whatever frustration that's coming down on her at work , is being transfered to you at home (the only safe place she let get it all out). It does not make it right or any easier to deal with, but it is what it is. You know you did not do anything wrong, try not to let her misdirected anger become your misery. It's so hard when it's your mother, but Lulu's right; it's not you.

*{{{{{{{{{{ Kriss & Rowan }}}}}}}}}}*​


----------



## Rowan

Thanks ladies...I just keep telling myself that its only another year or so that I have to live with her...just until im out of school. And she is now looking for a house to buy, so we're going to have to move soon....so that just adds to the stress im sure. *sigh*

but again..thanks ladies! *huge hugs*


----------



## HottiMegan

I am sad that Saturday is my 11th wedding anniversary. We were going to celebrate by hitting Sacramento for the weekend and playing at the water park all weekend. (our gifts to eachother are water park season passes.) Now it's going to be raining and cold the rest of the week  I'm glad i didn't book the hotel yet. I am hoping to only postpone it a week. I'm bummed because i was totally looking forward to going.


----------



## chocolate desire

The thought of not having a date for my birthday.


----------



## mossystate

The last of the LOVELY flowers a purty bunch of Dims women bought me, have wilted. They graced my coffee table, and made me smile everytime I looked at them.

:wubu:



the strawberies were gone in 2 days...ha


----------



## ThikJerseyChik

A very dear friend of mine has been diagnosed with cancer. She is a wonderful gentle spirit who has never had a decent break in her life. She is 63.

When my life was pretty much in the toilet, she was my lifeline....now it's my turn to return the favor.....

As frightened as I am for her and for the thought of losing her...she will NEVER see it in my eyes.....


TJC


----------



## mossystate

ThikJerseyChik said:


> A very dear friend of mine has been diagnosed with cancer. She is a wonderful gentle spirit who has never had a decent break in her life. She is 63.
> 
> When my life was pretty much in the toilet, she was my lifeline....now it's my turn to return the favor.....
> 
> As frightened as I am for her and for the thought of losing her...she will NEVER see it in my eyes.....
> 
> 
> TJC



Glad she has you in her corner. I hope she catches a huge break when all is said and done. Fucking cancer. I can imagine, just from this post, that you will help her in the best ways possible.


----------



## Shosh

That I cant go to the Dims bash in Florida.


----------



## GWARrior

Im wicked sad that theres no news of Boosh touring the States. Actually, I cant find much up-to-date info at all.

damn them!


----------



## Shosh

I am sad because I am going to miss my BBG, Big Beautiful Garden when I move.


----------



## sirumberto

That I'm going to have to learn to be single again. 

On the plus side, I'm now free to post here again.


----------



## GWARrior

I need time away from my bff and it makes me sad to think about it.

I love him to pieces, and we've been eachothers lifeline for years and years, but it can be so hard to be around him. Im sure Im not that easy to be around either, but at least I like to have fun.

He's anal about everything, and a complete neat freak. Im pretty chill and couldnt care less about washing my hands a bajillion times a day.

I never seem to do anything right by him. I cant load the dishwasher right, I cant cook pasta right, I couldnt even put ice in the cooler the right way (who knew there was a special way to put ice in the cooler??).

And his remarks can be so biting and mean and unfriendly.

Me: Im gonna try to give up soda. I drink waaay too much.
Him: Thats stupid.
Me: Huh?
Him: Why dont you give up something that actually matters?

a few days later...
Me: I havent had soda in 3 days! YAY!
Him: You had an energy drink the other day. Thats basically soda.

Me: I spray painted my boots silver! I love them!!
Him: You look ridiculous. (he was very serious about it, not trying to be funny)

Then he asked to go to Pride weekend in Boston. Im jobless at the moment and money's a bit tight. I told him this. Now he thinks he has *the right *to question every single purchase I make

GAH! I cant be around him without feeling like shit!


----------



## Les Toil

What's making me sad? what's making me sad? The fact that 102 incredibly important minutes of my life were spent watching a Will Farrell movie last night.

I do this every time. I convince myself that anyone that's that popular couldn't be as bad as I think, and then I watch another one of his movies and I'm then more convinced than ever that he's the most iritating man in film history.

Btw, the movie was "Semi Pro". Poor Woody Harrelson.


----------



## Zandoz

Pretty much everything lately.


----------



## Ruffie

I am sad to hear that my favorite kitty niece Mavis died. Our friends have 6 cats that I babysit cause one of them(not her) has seizures and has to have medicine and be watched when their mom and dad out of town on gigs or to visit family. She was having trouble breathing and as Derek got her into the cat cage and was rushing her to the vet she had a seizure and died. They are of course devastated as they have no kids other than their cats and Mavis was my favorite. Bye Floppy cat I will miss you!
Ruth 

View attachment Floppy cat.jpg


----------



## kayrae

A boy from Ohio who's breaking my heart into a million pieces.

Y'know... It's so much easier to be friends with straight boys. It's so much more fun. But when friendship begins to evolve into some kind of romantic relationship, it is so frustrating! I thought I was over him. I've been having fun. Too much fun maybe. I don't know. I can't even look at any other guys because I am pining away for the dumbest person ever. I just feel so silly caring so much. And I've basically closed myself off from forming close bonds with guys who fucking like me!


----------



## DeniseW

lost doggies


----------



## JoyJoy

No trip to FL for me  

/whine


----------



## Shosh

JoyJoy said:


> No trip to FL for me
> 
> /whine



I would like to go too.


----------



## Mathias

Susannah said:


> I would like to go too.



Ditto. ...


----------



## BarbBBW

Mathias said:


> Ditto. ...



me too but there is a NJBBW bash in Oct ober ,.. No matter what I am going!!


----------



## Mishty

Every country song on my playlsit is depressing.
I love me some country music, but in my fragile state of confusion it's almost bringing me to tears for about five songs now, and I just peeked and the next song is "Tonight I'm Gonna Cry" so......yah. 

Songs about love,divorce,fried chicken and babies, thats makin' me SAD.


----------



## BubbleButtBabe

I lost a dear friend and my aunt this past week,they were buried a day apart..Since I am now a coward and can barely handle funerals I only went to my aunt's and not to my friend's services..I couldn't bring myself to go to my friend's funeral because I didn't want to tell her good-bye yet...I wasn't ready..


----------



## Weeze

Mishty said:


> Every country song on my playlsit is depressing.
> I love me some country music, but in my fragile state of confusion it's almost bringing me to tears for about five songs now, and I just peeked and the next song is "Tonight I'm Gonna Cry" so......yah.
> 
> Songs about love,divorce,fried chicken and babies, thats makin' me SAD.



hmmm...
New Playlist for Miss Mishty:
Alright-Darius Rucker
It Happens -Sugarland
One in Every Crowd -Montgomery Gentry
Sideways - Dierks Bentley
Boots On -Randy Houser
Out Last Night -Kenny Chesney

GO girl


----------



## mergirl

BubbleButtBabe said:


> I lost a dear friend and my aunt this past week,they were buried a day apart..Since I am now a coward and can barely handle funerals I only went to my aunt's and not to my friend's services..I couldn't bring myself to go to my friend's funeral because I didn't want to tell her good-bye yet...I wasn't ready..


You can tell her when you are ready. Two funerals in the same week is too much for anyone, actually one funeral is too much. Sorry to hear of your loss. Take care. x


----------



## mergirl

Mishty said:


> Every country song on my playlsit is depressing.
> I love me some country music, but in my fragile state of confusion it's almost bringing me to tears for about five songs now, and I just peeked and the next song is "Tonight I'm Gonna Cry" so......yah.
> 
> Songs about love,divorce,fried chicken and babies, thats makin' me SAD.


I think GD has hidden my Neko Case CD for this very reason. See she thinks i get sad when i listen to it but its actually that i feel sad and thats why i listen to it. Sad music is the best for not feeling so sad by yourself!


----------



## Mishty

krismiss said:


> GO girl



I did, and downloaded all kinds of Sugarland/Jen Nettles stuff. She has some roarin' arse man hatin' songs I'm diggin'!
Grassyass!



mergirl said:


> I think GD has hidden my Neko Case CD for this very reason. See she thinks i get sad when i listen to it but its actually that i feel sad and thats why i listen to it. Sad music is the best for not feeling so sad by yourself!



Yesh! I dunno why we get blue and find heart wrenching music to make it *so* much worse, I guess so we have something to compare it to. :happy:


----------



## Tracy

I'm SAD because there is so much hate and racism in the world that we live in. I truly wish that LOVE was blind. I'm SAD to hear about all the children in the world who are sick, hungry, abused and killed. I'm SAD because so many people are losing their jobs. We need to pray to God to have mercy on the world that we live in.


----------



## HottiMegan

My sadness comes because for the second night in a row, Alex hasn't gone to sleep. It's 4am and i'm exhausted and he's awake. No signs of going down. I put him in the crib and he cries his ass of waking up everyone. i'm tired. We are supposed to go on a little mini-vacation and i'm going to be too tired to function. The angry thoughts pouring into my head directed at Alex really make me sad.


----------



## chocolate desire

I am sad bcause he still is not here


----------



## BarbBBW

I have been posting alot in this thread,...never a good sign!!
Alas,... I have fucked up another online friendship!!
SO whats my deal?? Am I too nice? Too forward ? Too caring? Too annoying? Too what?!?!? I just dont get it!!


----------



## Surlysomething

BarbBBW said:


> I have been posting alot in this thread,...never a good sign!!
> Alas,... I have fucked up another online friendship!!
> SO whats my deal?? Am I too nice? Too forward ? Too caring? Too annoying? Too what?!?!? I just dont get it!!




_From what I see (and you asked)_ you need to calm down. Too many of these "!!!" too many of these "???" . Less posts, more quality. Ease up on the overt sexuality. Give people some space. Relax.


----------



## TraciJo67

Surlysomething said:


> _From what I see (and you asked)_ you need to calm down. Too many of these "!!!" too many of these "???" . Less posts, more quality. Ease up on the overt sexuality. Give people some space. Relax.



n to the a to the i to the l to the e to the d to the i to the t.


----------



## JoyJoy

BarbBBW said:


> I have been posting alot in this thread,...never a good sign!!
> Alas,... I have fucked up another online friendship!!
> SO whats my deal?? Am I too nice? Too forward ? Too caring? Too annoying? Too what?!?!? I just dont get it!!


Barb, you seem like a very, very nice person....but I have to agree with Surly. Your attitude is great, just very overwhelming in this format. 

That said, I'm sorry you lost a friend - that's not a good feeling. I hope you're able to patch it up.


----------



## BarbBBW

lol well thank you ladies!! point well taken!! and I agree with you all!! Thanks a bunch!:happy:


----------



## thejuicyone

BarbBBW said:


> I have been posting alot in this thread,...never a good sign!!
> Alas,... I have fucked up another online friendship!!
> SO whats my deal?? Am I too nice? Too forward ? Too caring? Too annoying? Too what?!?!? I just dont get it!!



People are intimidated by your awesomeness...
But, whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...lol


----------



## undrcovrbrothr

BarbBBW said:


> I have been posting alot in this thread,...never a good sign!!
> Alas,... I have fucked up another online friendship!!
> SO whats my deal?? Am I too nice? Too forward ? Too caring? Too annoying? Too what?!?!? I just dont get it!!





thejuicyone said:


> *People are intimidated by your awesomeness...*
> But, whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...lol



DITTO!!!!!! Rep.

1. Don't EVER apologize for who you are or change to suit others.

2. If they can't accept you for who you are, then they were not your friend.

3. Life is WAY too short to be worried about a few bad apples or some jealous people... venom comes easily, patience is a hard road. 

Told ya I had your back!! :wubu:


----------



## Surlysomething

undrcovrbrothr said:


> DITTO!!!!!! Rep.
> 
> 1. Don't EVER apologize for who you are or change to suit others.
> 
> 2. If they can't accept you for who you are, then they were not your friend.
> 
> 3. Life is WAY too short to be worried about a few bad apples or some jealous people... venom comes easily, patience is a hard road.
> 
> Told ya I had your back!! :wubu:



Yeah, I really don't think that's it. But thanks for taking some actual constructive criticism and warping it to suit your own needs.


----------



## steely

BarbBBW said:


> I have been posting alot in this thread,...never a good sign!!
> Alas,... I have fucked up another online friendship!!
> SO whats my deal?? Am I too nice? Too forward ? Too caring? Too annoying? Too what?!?!? I just dont get it!!



Barb, you can only be what you are and those who mind don't matter and the ones that matter don't mind, to paraphrase Dr. Suess. To thine own self be true.:happy:


----------



## undrcovrbrothr

Surlysomething said:


> Yeah, I really don't think that's it. But thanks for taking some actual constructive criticism and warping it to suit your own needs.



Thanks for taking a differing opinion that didn't knock yours and making it into something it is not... that says more than I could ever say. EVER.


----------



## BarbBBW

Surlysomething said:


> Yeah, I really don't think that's it. But thanks for taking some actual constructive criticism and warping it to suit your own needs.



I do not want this to turn into something negative please!

*I appreciate everyones comments!*

There is no right or wrong in any answers to my thread!


----------



## mossystate

undrcovrbrothr said:


> ... jealous people...



A few days back, I was going to post about times I have seen the jealousy charge whipped out, and how it sometimes does nothing to actually address an issue...and more than that...does nothing solid for the person one is trying to make feel better.

I am not even talking about any particular situation, although, as you see, Barb did ask a question. She was not slammed by a bunch of people. Would it be any more fair to suggest that you just want to be told how wonderful you are, and be sexually flirted with, over and over? If someone said that, then they would be dismissing your friendship with Barb...yes? I think so.

While jealousy can be real, it is probably best to back up off a situation and get a clear look. It's just something I see a lot, online, and off. So odd. Oh, and to call anybody jealous, when you don't know if it is the case...that is rather snakelike, in and of itself.


----------



## Surlysomething

undrcovrbrothr said:


> Thanks for taking a differing opinion that didn't knock yours and making it into something it is not... that says more than I could ever say. EVER.




You interact and encourage this behavior because you find it titillating, most do not. And I think Barb is far too nice of a person to recognize the difference.


----------



## TraciJo67

undrcovrbrothr said:


> Thanks for taking a differing opinion that didn't knock yours and making it into something it is not... that says more than I could ever say. EVER.



Well, your opinion *did* knock hers, and let's not pretend otherwise. 

What Surly said to Barb was, I'm sure, difficult to absorb. But Barb did ask for feedback, and I think it was valid. Barb may not think so, you may not think so & 99.5% of those reading this may not ... but it is Surly's perspective, and I happen to share it. That doesn't mean that I'm "jealous" or "mean" or any of the other labels that you attached to your response, or that Surly is any of those things. It simply means that Barb's online persona rubs some people the wrong way. Just as mine does. And yours, probably, for some people. When someone expresses disagreement, it doesn't always mean that person is jealous. Frankly, I'm tired of seeing that cheap, meaningless, and actually rather insulting term being so casually slung around.


----------



## Surlysomething

BarbBBW said:


> I do not want this to turn into something negative please!
> 
> *I appreciate everyones comments!*
> 
> There is no right or wrong in any answers to my thread!



No worries. I just don't want wishy washy bullshit to negate any true advice.


----------



## Surlysomething

mossystate said:


> A few days back, I was going to post about times I have seen the jealousy charge whipped out, and how it sometimes does nothing to actually address an issue...and more than that...does nothing solid for the person one is trying to make feel better.
> 
> I am not even talking about any particular situation, although, as you see, Barb did ask a question. She was not slammed by a bunch of people. Would it be any more fair to suggest that you just want to be told how wonderful you are, and be sexually flirted with, over and over? If someone said that, then they would be dismissing your friendship with Barb...yes? I think so.
> 
> While jealousy can be real, it is probably best to back up off a situation and get a clear look. It's just something I see a lot, online, and off. So odd. Oh, and to call anybody jealous, when you don't know if it is the case...that is rather snakelike, in and of itself.



Exactly.


----------



## mossystate

BarbBBW said:


> I do not want this to turn into something negative please!



Barb, I think it would have been nice if you had noticed the part where undercover started in on the ' jealous ' people...that is fairly negative. I am afraid that this confirms that, if it is a man you want to flirt with, you wander past his negativity. Maybe you did not read his post...if that's the case, then, no problem.


----------



## Surlysomething

TraciJo67 said:


> Well, your opinion *did* knock hers, and let's not pretend otherwise.
> 
> What Surly said to Barb was, I'm sure, difficult to absorb. But Barb did ask for feedback, and I think it was valid. Barb may not think so, you may not think so & 99.5% of those reading this may not ... but it is Surly's perspective, and I happen to share it. That doesn't mean that I'm "jealous" or "mean" or any of the other labels that you attached to your response, or that Surly is any of those things. It simply means that Barb's online persona rubs some people the wrong way. Just as mine does. And yours, probably, for some people. When someone expresses disagreement, it doesn't always mean that person is jealous. Frankly, I'm tired of seeing that cheap, meaningless, and actually rather insulting term being so casually slung around.



Yes, i'm far from jealous. In fact i'm pretty happy that I don't get what I see as 'negative' attention.


----------



## undrcovrbrothr

Surlysomething said:


> No worries. I just don't want wishy washy bullshit to negate any true advice.



Venom, and more venom. Sorry, but your blatant, immature attack on my advice, as if that invalidates it, is totally below the belt and uncalled for. Once again, you are digging yourself a hole, not I!


----------



## Surlysomething

undrcovrbrothr said:


> Venom, and more venom. Sorry, but your blatant, immature attack on my advice, as if that invalidates it, is totally below the belt and uncalled for. Once again, you are digging yourself a hole, not I!




:doh: I think you're the one digging a hole. Venom? Immaturity? Not from me. Take a look in the mirror.


----------



## undrcovrbrothr

Surlysomething said:


> :doh: I think you're the one digging a hole. Venom? Immaturity? Not from me. Take a look in the mirror.



I'm just sitting here laughing, for you are so tightly wound in anger it is very obvious... words like "warping it to suit your own needs" and "petty" and "bullshit", words that are not mature to say the least. Very amusing, but I'm not biting.


----------



## mossystate

You just did.




Nom nom nom.


----------



## Surlysomething

I'm just shaking my head and laughing. Unbelievable.

Sorry everyone, i'm an asshole magnet.


----------



## undrcovrbrothr

mossystate said:


> You just did.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Nom nom nom.



_THEY were standing under a tree, each with an arm round the other's neck, and Alice knew which was which in a moment, because one of them had "DUM" embroidered on his collar, and the other "DEE". `I suppose they've each got "TWEEDLE" round at the back of the collar,' she said to herself.

They stood so still that she quite forgot they were alive, and she was just going round to see if the word "TWEEDLE" was written at the back of each collar, when she was startled by a voice coming from the one marked "DUM".

`If you think we're wax-works,' he said, `you ought to pay, you know. Wax-works weren't made to be looked at for nothing. Nohow.'

`Contrariwise,' added the one marked "DEE", `if you think we're alive, you ought to speak.'

`I'm sure I'm very sorry,' was all Alice could say; for the words of the old song kept ringing through her head like the ticking of a clock, and she could hardly help saying them out loud: Tweedledum and Tweedledee
Agreed to have a battle!
For Tweedledum said Tweedledee
Had spoiled his nice new rattle.
Just then flew down a monstrous crow,
As black as a tar-barrel!
Which frightened both the heroes so,
They quite forgot their quarrel.'

`I know what you're thinking about,' said Tweedledum; `but it isn't so, nohow.'

`Contrariwise,' continued Tweedledee, `if it was so, it might be; and if it were so, it would be; but as it isn't, it ain't. That's logic.' _

And the circle is complete! And with that, I bid a fond _adieu_. Barb, now you know what I was saying long before this thread  You're the best :wubu:


----------



## Surlysomething

Hahahaha.


I'm not going to say anything about men not being secure in their own masculinity around strong women and resulting to childish behavior. Nope, not going there. Napoleon? Nope. Not going there.


----------



## fatgirlflyin

I don't understand what was so wrong with Surly's reply. Barb asked a question and Surly gave her answer based on her own opinions of behavior she has seen exhibited by Barb.

I don't think it was out of line for Surly to suggest that Barb's overt flirtations are a turn off to some people here. Its not like it was unsolicited, Barb asked! I don't know that it was necessary to come riding to the rescue when no harm was being done. To you Barb's the best, but to someone she obviously wasn't. Otherwise she wouldn't have been on here posting about being sad over blowing a friendship.






undrcovrbrothr said:


> _THEY were standing under a tree, each with an arm round the other's neck, and Alice knew which was which in a moment, because one of them had "DUM" embroidered on his collar, and the other "DEE". `I suppose they've each got "TWEEDLE" round at the back of the collar,' she said to herself.
> 
> They stood so still that she quite forgot they were alive, and she was just going round to see if the word "TWEEDLE" was written at the back of each collar, when she was startled by a voice coming from the one marked "DUM".
> 
> `If you think we're wax-works,' he said, `you ought to pay, you know. Wax-works weren't made to be looked at for nothing. Nohow.'
> 
> `Contrariwise,' added the one marked "DEE", `if you think we're alive, you ought to speak.'
> 
> `I'm sure I'm very sorry,' was all Alice could say; for the words of the old song kept ringing through her head like the ticking of a clock, and she could hardly help saying them out loud: Tweedledum and Tweedledee
> Agreed to have a battle!
> For Tweedledum said Tweedledee
> Had spoiled his nice new rattle.
> Just then flew down a monstrous crow,
> As black as a tar-barrel!
> Which frightened both the heroes so,
> They quite forgot their quarrel.'
> 
> `I know what you're thinking about,' said Tweedledum; `but it isn't so, nohow.'
> 
> `Contrariwise,' continued Tweedledee, `if it was so, it might be; and if it were so, it would be; but as it isn't, it ain't. That's logic.' _
> 
> And the circle is complete! And with that, I bid a fond _adieu_. Barb, now you know what I was saying long before this thread  You're the best :wubu:


----------



## mossystate

undrcovrbrothr said:


> And the circle is complete! And with that, I bid a fond _adieu_. Barb, now you know what I was saying long before this thread  You're the best :wubu:



Bet your eyelid is twitching.


----------



## GWARrior

WAY TO GO everyone.


----------



## undrcovrbrothr

Ella Bella said:


> I don't understand what was so wrong with Surly's reply. Barb asked a question and Surly gave her answer based on her own opinions of behavior she has seen exhibited by Barb.
> 
> I don't think it was out of line for Surly to suggest that Barb's overt flirtations are a turn off to some people here. Its not like it was unsolicited, Barb asked! I don't know that it was necessary to come riding to the rescue when no harm was being done. To you Barb's the best, but to someone she obviously wasn't. Otherwise she wouldn't have been on here posting about being sad over blowing a friendship.



Umm, it wasn't her reply, it was her reply to MY advice which was so very out of line, based on the flimsiest of reasoning and assumptions that were way off. Some people ARE jealous of her, and that doesn't mean all, which is wrong. She's a very open person, and I totally respect her for that... it is wonderful. I have lost too many people in this life to see others be hemmed into a corner for being themselves. And with the inevitable defense of my advice came the swooping down by a couple of others to try and gang up on me like kids. That's why I found it so amusing.


----------



## fatgirlflyin

ok but how do you know people are jealous of her? Have you seen people say so? I haven't. So what makes you assume that some people are jealous?




undrcovrbrothr said:


> Umm, it wasn't her reply, it was her reply to MY advice which was so very out of line, based on the flimsiest of reasoning and assumptions that were way off. Some people ARE jealous of her, and that doesn't mean all, which is wrong. She's a very open person, and I totally respect her for that... it is wonderful. I have lost too many people in this life to see others be hemmed into a corner for being themselves. And with the inevitable defense of my advice came the swooping down by a couple of others to try and gang up on me like kids. That's why I found it so amusing.


----------



## Surlysomething

"And with that, I bid a fond _adieu"


_That lasted long.


----------



## BarbBBW

:doh:STOP:doh:


----------



## thejuicyone

How come the more I say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes?

(Doesn't really make me sad, but this forums mood needs some lightening)


----------



## JoyJoy

TraciJo67 said:


> Well, your opinion *did* knock hers, and let's not pretend otherwise.
> 
> What Surly said to Barb was, I'm sure, difficult to absorb. But Barb did ask for feedback, and I think it was valid. Barb may not think so, you may not think so & 99.5% of those reading this may not ... but it is Surly's perspective, and I happen to share it. That doesn't mean that I'm "jealous" or "mean" or any of the other labels that you attached to your response, or that Surly is any of those things. It simply means that Barb's online persona rubs some people the wrong way. Just as mine does. And yours, probably, for some people. When someone expresses disagreement, it doesn't always mean that person is jealous. Frankly, I'm tired of seeing that cheap, meaningless, and actually rather insulting term being so casually slung around.


Excellent post. 

People have been snarky to Barb. *I* have been snarky toward Barb, and for that I apologize. I can definitely understand why her friends are coming to her defense here. The thing is, though, in this thread - people weren't trying to cut her down. As has been said, she asked, people answered constructively. Not to cut her down or hurt her feelings, but to be honest about the effect she has on some people. 

Darrell, I'm not going to assume that you were including me in the "jealous people", but if you were, you couldn't be more wrong. You know Barb's personality is totally different from mine - nothing wrong with that, but I am among the people who gets rubbed the wrong way by her "enthusiasm" and blatant and almost constant, overt sexual comments. You know, Darrel..I do wish I weren't so gloomy feeling right now, but I'm not the sort of person who would treat someone badly over my own personal issues, and those issues have nothing to do with what we're discussing here. 

No one is asking her to feel bad about herself or not "be" herself, but if an adult can't come into a group of diverse personalities and be able to temper themselves, and then wonder why they get a negative reaction from some, then there's a lesson to be learned. She can act however she wants here, just like all of us can, but that doesn't mean people are going to suddenly stop being annoyed. 

Barb...I love your positivity and sunny disposition and the way you have kind words for everyone. In real life, I'm willing to bet you'd be a pleasure to be around. Again, I apologize if I've hurt your feelings, but just as others are encouraging you to express yourself freely, I feel the same freedom to express myself and I hope you'll take it in the nature it's intended. If there's any confusion about what exactly that nature is, please feel free to PM me.


----------



## chocolate desire

That this thread is starting to look like Hyde Park...


----------



## undrcovrbrothr

JoyJoy said:


> Darrell, I'm not going to assume that you were including me in the "jealous people", but if you were, you couldn't be more wrong. You know Barb's personality is totally different from mine - nothing wrong with that, but I am among the people who gets rubbed the wrong way by her "enthusiasm" and blatant and almost constant, overt sexual comments. You know, Darrel..I do wish I weren't so gloomy feeling right now, but I'm not the sort of person who would treat someone badly over my own personal issues, and those issues have nothing to do with what we're discussing here.



Ohh, NOOOO, I was NOT talking about you at all, and I am SOOOO sorry if you thought for even one minute you were one of those "jealous" people or someone who would be like that. Maybe I used the wrong word, but I don't know what other word to use for the kind of thing that happens where other women talk about another woman to the point where it is a bitch session or worse off of the flimsiest of reasoning, or there is a hint of it. 

Now I am sad, for that was the last thing I would ever want you to think... I know how hard it is to be assailed for being different and for people to try and change me because I don't fit in, and I just didn't want to see it happen to her. You know me, it is just in my nature to care. You don't have to be gloomy alone, you know... I'm still here


----------



## BarbBBW

this thread is making me sad now,... and I thought I had other issues haha.
Ok Let me just clear up a few things here please.

*Constructive criticism is always welcomed, and I can always use it! I appreciate that people can tell me, in their opinions, honestly, what they think!

I know I am annoying to alot of people here on the DIMS boards. I don't mean it. Thats just who I am. I am very caring, affectionate,silly, and yes very sexual in my remarks, or comments, when it is in the right setting. 

I am caring to a fault! I just want to take care of everyone and make sure they are happy. If they are sick, i want to make sure they are feeling better. If they are sad, I want to see what I can do to make them happy. I know it is impossible. But thats my urge. To encourage people to be happy with life, even though it is hard alot of times for alot of us. To encourage confidence within themselves, and show the world just how great they are, inside and out. And Yes, it does make me feel good to post such things, because if I can help just 1 or 2 people be a little happier, to maybe share a smile with a stranger, in the very least. Then makes me happy!

As far as the sexual comments, I think I have toned them down quite a bit. Yes, I know I can get outta hand with some of them. But, honestly, thats just me. I have always been a flirty, a big annoying flirt. Its just worse for me, the sexual reactions towards FA's. They are my addiction.And when I am on Dims, between all the gorgeous women and all the good looking men, true I say some pretty sluttly things. And If I wasnt married, they would all be true and I would prob be the biggest slut on DIMS. As for right now, I am just a woman who flirts alot with men and women!

AS for my enthusiasm , YES i am very excited to be a part of the DIMS community. I love that there is a place for people of size to talk, chat, flirty,see pics, and have events together. That just makes me life better! Just to know people of any size can post and exchange idea's about everyday life, recipes ,fantasies, stories, etc!

So, in a nut shell, thats all I wanted to say. I can not thank you all enough for dealing with me, reading this blah blah from me.
For those who enjoy reading my post, I thank you :bow:
For those of you I annoy, i am sorry, but this is me!:bow:*


----------



## Surlysomething




----------



## goofy girl

GWARrior said:


> I need time away from my bff and it makes me sad to think about it.
> 
> I love him to pieces, and we've been eachothers lifeline for years and years, but it can be so hard to be around him. Im sure Im not that easy to be around either, but at least I like to have fun.
> 
> He's anal about everything, and a complete neat freak. Im pretty chill and couldnt care less about washing my hands a bajillion times a day.
> 
> I never seem to do anything right by him. I cant load the dishwasher right, I cant cook pasta right, I couldnt even put ice in the cooler the right way (who knew there was a special way to put ice in the cooler??).
> 
> And his remarks can be so biting and mean and unfriendly.
> 
> Me: Im gonna try to give up soda. I drink waaay too much.
> Him: Thats stupid.
> Me: Huh?
> Him: Why dont you give up something that actually matters?
> 
> a few days later...
> Me: I havent had soda in 3 days! YAY!
> Him: You had an energy drink the other day. Thats basically soda.
> 
> Me: I spray painted my boots silver! I love them!!
> Him: You look ridiculous. (he was very serious about it, not trying to be funny)
> 
> Then he asked to go to Pride weekend in Boston. Im jobless at the moment and money's a bit tight. I told him this. Now he thinks he has *the right *to question every single purchase I make
> 
> GAH! I cant be around him without feeling like shit!



So what you're saying is that you're irritated at your husband and tired of married life?


----------



## GWARrior

goofy girl said:


> So what you're saying is that you're irritated at your husband and tired of married life?



friends have often commented that we act like we're married


----------



## Cors

GWARrior said:


> friends have often commented that we act like we're married



Heh, tell yourself that men (or to a lesser extent, butches) just don't get it sometimes, and continue posting your awesome DIY projects here!


----------



## CleverBomb

BarbBBW said:


> :doh:STOP:doh:


Hammertime.

-Rusty


----------



## JohnWylde

and I am sooo sad I am not there!

But I do love Renee's new profile


lil john




chocolate desire said:


> I am sad bcause he still is not here


----------



## Mini

I can't get a date to save my life.

I love living in a relatively isolated mountain community, but it does make certain things nigh-on impossible.


----------



## mergirl

Mini said:


> I can't get a date to save my life.
> 
> I love living in a relatively isolated mountain community, but it does make certain things nigh-on impossible.


But, i'll bet the higher altitude makes masturbation slighty more exhilarating.


----------



## sirumberto

Know what? I'm refusing to be sad right now. That's right, screw you sad. I don't need you.


----------



## BarbBBW

Mini said:


> I can't get a date to save my life.
> 
> I love living in a relatively isolated mountain community, but it does make certain things nigh-on impossible.



If *YOU* can't get a date,.. the world is in serious trouble!!


----------



## Mathias

I live kind of a dull life...


----------



## BarbBBW

Mathias said:


> I live kind of a dull life...



me too babe ,... me too!! Gotta make it interesting somehow! go cause some trouble! thats what I always do!


----------



## sirumberto

Mathias said:


> I live kind of a dull life...



Dull never lasts. Pretty soon you'll be wishing for dull.


----------



## sirumberto

A friend of mine suggested getting blackout drunk for just one night to deal with depression. Her idea was that if you can deal with whatever is bothering you with a killer hangover, you can deal with it any other time.

...I gotta see if I did any damage to the bathroom.


----------



## mergirl

See! my gf disagrees but i totally feel that getting a bit drunk can reprogram your brain in some way. I have done this twice in the past year and a half when i felt a bit clouded and it TOTALLY worked! Though, i might just have been killing off the brain cells that were the ones causing me anoyance. . I dont really like the feeling of being steaming drunk, so i guess on the whole i am a poor advocate for scotland!!


----------



## BeautifulPoeticDisaster

my lack of social life.


----------



## GWARrior

Im sad that my favorite show was just on and when I tried to watch it, my satelite was all "Fuck you bitch, I dont feel like working today!" 

Yea, it was an episode Ive already seen and I can watch it again online... but thats not the point!


----------



## mergirl

BigBellySSBBW said:


> my lack of social life.


Shout up some of the Uk dimmers for a wee night out sometime!! See i choose to have no social life because i prefer foosting away in my study shaking my fist at the pesky children making all the racket outside!! pesky kids!!


----------



## sirumberto

mergirl said:


> See! my gf disagrees but i totally feel that getting a bit drunk can reprogram your brain in some way. I have done this twice in the past year and a half when i felt a bit clouded and it TOTALLY worked! Though, i might just have been killing off the brain cells that were the ones causing me anoyance. . I dont really like the feeling of being steaming drunk, so i guess on the whole i am a poor advocate for scotland!!



We'll see how I feel later today. For now I'm just starting to be able to move without waves of nausea.

I'll keep you posted on the experiment.


----------



## Emma

The fact that I'm always there for people and never get anything in return. I mean, I don't do things for the reward, I just do what I would want people to do for me if I was in their situation but if I ever need any help or someone to talk to no one is ever there for me. 

I'm pretty sick of it. It seems to be every friend that I've ever had. To be honest I don't think they do it to be mean, they're just all self absorbed and put themselves before everyone else. 

Which is what I'm going to do too. So from now on everyone can just sod off and if they're in trouble they can just fix it themselves because I will not be saving another person. I will not be listening to people, I won't be lending money or taking friends out to cheer them up and I certainly won't be offering my house out to anyone to live in.


----------



## mergirl

sirumberto said:


> We'll see how I feel later today. For now I'm just starting to be able to move without waves of nausea.
> 
> I'll keep you posted on the experiment.


Oh yeah..Hangovers are not so fun.. Which is why i leave my brain rebooting to just a couple of times a year! Yes keep us updated.


----------



## Ruffie

I hear you Em. Been seeing that alot around in my life right now also. Thankfully not with my closest friends but alot of coworkers, acquaintances and with the kids I work with. I think extending yourself is never a mistake, but as you have learned its not doing it over and over again for people who do not appreciate it. You are awesome for doing so!


----------



## Ruffie

I guess whats making me sad is the negativity that others spread around trying to make themselves superior or to gain favors with others. Grow up already - seriously!


----------



## sirumberto

CurvyEm said:


> The fact that I'm always there for people and never get anything in return. I mean, I don't do things for the reward, I just do what I would want people to do for me if I was in their situation but if I ever need any help or someone to talk to no one is ever there for me.
> 
> I'm pretty sick of it. It seems to be every friend that I've ever had. To be honest I don't think they do it to be mean, they're just all self absorbed and put themselves before everyone else.
> 
> Which is what I'm going to do too. So from now on everyone can just sod off and if they're in trouble they can just fix it themselves because I will not be saving another person. I will not be listening to people, I won't be lending money or taking friends out to cheer them up and I certainly won't be offering my house out to anyone to live in.



I understand the feeling. You can try what I'm trying right now. I feel pretty beat up emotionally and financially from the past couple years, and I'm taking the rest of the year for myself. Don't cut off that part of you forever, just try taking some time for yourself.


----------



## mergirl

CurvyEm said:


> The fact that I'm always there for people and never get anything in return. I mean, I don't do things for the reward, I just do what I would want people to do for me if I was in their situation but if I ever need any help or someone to talk to no one is ever there for me.
> 
> I'm pretty sick of it. It seems to be every friend that I've ever had. To be honest I don't think they do it to be mean, they're just all self absorbed and put themselves before everyone else.
> 
> Which is what I'm going to do too. So from now on everyone can just sod off and if they're in trouble they can just fix it themselves because I will not be saving another person. I will not be listening to people, I won't be lending money or taking friends out to cheer them up and I certainly won't be offering my house out to anyone to live in.


Friendship has to be reciprocal or you just end up feeling shit and with no energy. I had to cut a few folks out of my life a couple of years ago because they only took from me; My emotional energy, money, time, patience..and so on and gave nothing back in return. I think these kind of people need to learn and the only way they will do so is if you cut them off. Unless they are emotionally retarded in which case they possibly will never get it and you just have to avoid them. I think i have actually got better at spotting energy suckers a mile off and try to avoid them like the plague!!! You need to save your energies for the people who love you and give you energies back.


----------



## Spanky

.....
....
...
..


----------



## mergirl

Spanky said:


> .....
> ....
> ...
> ..


wow. A pyramid of sadness!


----------



## Gingembre

...that I won't be waking up to this again for quite a while :


----------



## bexy

I'm sooo out of the loop!! When did that happen!?! Oh and sorry you're sad hun, nearly forgot that bit! xx


----------



## GWARrior

I was watching Gordon Ramsay's The F Word and he had his piggies slaughtered.  They were electrocuted and then their throats were slit. It was loud and bloody and very upsetting. I cried a lot. even Gordon was having trouble watching.

Im so happy I dont contribute to that.


----------



## BarbBBW

GWARrior said:


> I was watching Gordon Ramsay's The F Word and he had his piggies slaughtered.  They were electrocuted and then their throats were slit. It was loud and bloody and very upsetting. I cried a lot. even Gordon was having trouble watching.
> 
> Im so happy I dont contribute to that.



yes they had one where he had his sheep killed also!! and ducks too
ITS GROSSSSS


----------



## BarbBBW

Spanky said:


> .....
> ....
> ...
> ..



HMMMMMMMMMMM WHY SO MANY SAD FACES!?
you are Spanky,... be Happy!!


----------



## undrcovrbrothr

I'm sad because the Amazon will be missing a woman for a while  I'm with ya, Gingembre!


----------



## Mini

I love getting shot down for dates.


----------



## GWARrior

Mini said:


> I love getting shot down for dates.



you're asking out the wrong people!


----------



## Emma

I just wanted to say that I was wrong about my friends. 

I needed them the most today and they were there for me. Searching the streets at 6:30am, helping me ring round vets and rescue centres and one even took time out of his work day to make me a load of posters and flyers and got his work friend to deliver them for me.


----------



## disconnectedsmile

the oppression of Iranian people is making me very sad right now.
but i'm hopeful that this 21st century revolution will provide _some_ kind of salvation.


----------



## mel

missing my kiddies


----------



## Mini

GWARrior said:


> you're asking out the wrong people!



How do I identify the right people?


----------



## mossystate

I have no more raspberries. This is a tragedy.


----------



## mergirl

mossystate said:


> I have no more raspberries. This is a tragedy.


Sorry, my pain is worse. I had bought strawberries and they were 'in date' and when i went to eat them this morning they were furry!!  My driver..i mean my girlfriend is off on holiday so i cant even take them back to complain and shout and be an arsehole to the poor help desk people who are on minimum wage and to pretend that i ate them and got sick etc.. i could get a bus but to be frank that is beneath me.. plus its raining. My story of fruity pain just shat right over yours there.. i mean..FURRY STRAWBERRIES!! Its like they are there... they still smell great..but you know you just should never eat furry foods.. goddam society and its food rules!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


----------



## JoyJoy

mossystate said:


> I have no more raspberries. This is a tragedy.


I read this and didn't take it in the literal sense, but knew right away I was wrong...because Monique with no raspberries left is an impossibility.


----------



## KnottyOne

My favorite teacher from high school passed away the other day. He really helped mold who I am today, so I'm just kind of totally blown away by this. The worst part is I was supposed to grab a drink with him a while ago but we had to cancel and never rescheduled. So yea.... kinda more than bumed out at the moment......


----------



## mossystate

mergirl said:


> Sorry, my pain is worse. I had bought strawberries and they were 'in date' and when i went to eat them this morning they were furry!!  My driver..i mean my girlfriend is off on holiday so i cant even take them back to complain and shout and be an arsehole to the poor help desk people who are on minimum wage and to pretend that i ate them and got sick etc.. i could get a bus but to be frank that is beneath me.. plus its raining. My story of fruity pain just shat right over yours there.. i mean..FURRY STRAWBERRIES!! Its like they are there... they still smell great..but you know you just should never eat furry foods.. goddam society and its food rules!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Get your finger out of your nose....oh, wait, that's me....and CALL THE STORE. Then, when you go back in, they will have your merplaint ( com is off for the day ), and...TA-DA!

Oh, and, what the hell were these things packed in that you could not do that very difficult action of looking at the berries??!!? I say you should experience more pain. What is your home address. I want to send you some shifty looking pineapple. 



JoyJoy said:


> I read this and didn't take it in the literal sense, but knew right away I was wrong...because Monique with no raspberries left is an impossibility.



Me? Huh? What? You sure you have the right person?


----------



## mergirl

mossystate said:


> Oh, and, what the hell were these things packed in that you could not do that very difficult action of looking at the berries??!!? I say you should experience more pain. What is your home address. I want to send you some shifty looking pineapple.



Mossy..they got furry overnight on the day BEFORE they were ment to go off!! Well the day they were ment to be sold by!! This shop are shit..here are my complaints.
1-I bought strawberry and bannana smoothies and i drank one and then realised that on the day i bought them they were 2 days out of date!!
2-I bought carrots for a shepherds pie and they went bendy after a day.. Even if this is because of nature.. i shall blame the store..
3-Oh..its a whole cheese incident.. but i need to go cause beth ditto is on tv wearing a purple thing and slagging off rich people..i need to write to her to tell her "Beth, you are hot and i like your dress..but have you really given all your money away to charity?"

Anyway..my adress is:
The Mergirl
The Sea
The Scotland
The UK
The Universe

I await my shifty pinapple with trepidatious squirming excitement!!:happy:
Oh..good idea about calling the store btw!! You americans know your shopping rights.. us in the UK just eat our mouldy fruit and grumble on forums!!


----------



## Surlysomething

KnottyOne said:


> My favorite teacher from high school passed away the other day. He really helped mold who I am today, so I'm just kind of totally blown away by this. The worst part is I was supposed to grab a drink with him a while ago but we had to cancel and never rescheduled. So yea.... kinda more than bumed out at the moment......




I'm sorry you lost your friend.


----------



## Ali

Screwing up at my job *again*

I need to get a mindless job where I cannot make mistakes...my tender heart can't take this.


----------



## Sandie_Zitkus

I miss our pup Peanut.


----------



## Gingembre

KnottyOne said:


> My favorite teacher from high school passed away the other day. He really helped mold who I am today, so I'm just kind of totally blown away by this. The worst part is I was supposed to grab a drink with him a while ago but we had to cancel and never rescheduled. So yea.... kinda more than bumed out at the moment......




*hugs* I'm really sorry.


----------



## sirumberto

I am becoming increasingly aware of my lack of any physical contact with another person, though I'm grateful for the social contact I get here. The little town I'm currently stuck in isn't exactly the best for socializing.


----------



## bexy

I am sad because I have been let down yet again by someone I love.
I'm sad that I spend too much time, effort and energy on people only to get nothing in return.
I'm sad that I am 36 weeks pregnant and although I have lots of lovely friends, I have no family of my own to share this with.
I'm sad that the girl I call my family is more interested in getting drunk and spending £20 a week on wine than £50 on return flights to Belfast in August, despite promising me she was coming.
I'm sad that she is going to spend money on her friend's baby's christening, but still not come here as promised.
I'm sad that when I tried to talk to her about it she told me I was out of order!!

(She was recently prosecuted for Benefit Fraud and is going to lose her benefits and have to pay the money falsely claimed back. I pity her but it is her own fault! I understand she has no money now, but if she has enough to buy wine and get drunk, and go to see other people's babies, are there no cutbacks anywhere she could make to come and see mine, like promised?!?!?!)

I'm fed up of loving people more than they love me.

And I am fed up of being so desperate to have people to call family that I put up with shit all of the time.


----------



## mergirl

bexy said:


> And I am fed up of being so desperate to have people to call family that I put up with shit all of the time.



George and the bump are your family now. You need to save your energies for them and not on anyone who doesn't give you energies back.


----------



## bexy

I know they are Mer, it just feels like if god forbid George and I ever broke up or rowed or anything, he would have his rents. I have no one. I know I sound like I am feeling sorry for myself, but I'm just so cross that life is so unfair that I have don't have anyone to call my family. 

Maybe I will feel more secure once babba comes along, but at the mo because this girl has let me down, and I have known her like 13 years, I really feel like I just can't trust a single soul, even George.


----------



## mergirl

bexy said:


> I know they are Mer, it just feels like if god forbid George and I ever broke up or rowed or anything, he would have his rents. I have no one. I know I sound like I am feeling sorry for myself, but I'm just so cross that life is so unfair that I have don't have anyone to call my family.
> 
> Maybe I will feel more secure once babba comes along, but at the mo because this girl has let me down, and I have known her like 13 years, I really feel like I just can't trust a single soul, even George.


I think your baby hormones wont be helping either, You must feel all over the place. I can speak from experience and say that even having 'family' doesnt always make you feel secure. I know once your baby comes you will feel better. Your friend is going through her own drama at the moment and it seems like she is acting a bit self obsessed, it doesn't mean she loves you any less. She has let you down and i think you were right in telling her how she made you feel. Is there no way she can work out a way of saving to come see you. There is a legal amount the government have to give you to live on even if you are paying stuff back..so maby she can work something out. Sorry to hear you are feeling like this..


----------



## BarbBBW

bexy said:


> I know they are Mer, it just feels like if god forbid George and I ever broke up or rowed or anything, he would have his rents. I have no one. I know I sound like I am feeling sorry for myself, but I'm just so cross that life is so unfair that I have don't have anyone to call my family.
> 
> Maybe I will feel more secure once babba comes along, but at the mo because this girl has let me down, and I have known her like 13 years, I really feel like I just can't trust a single soul, even George.



*BIG HUGS* I am sorry hunny, you are feeling sad and dealing with this shit right now. sometimes people SUCK and its usually when we need them the most. But things will get better! Keep being positive and relaxed , as much as possible!:kiss2:


----------



## bexy

BarbBBW said:


> *BIG HUGS* I am sorry hunny, you are feeling sad and dealing with this shit right now. sometimes people SUCK and its usually when we need them the most. But things will get better! Keep being positive and relaxed , as much as possible!:kiss2:



Thanks Barb  xo


----------



## cinnamitch

bexy said:


> I am sad because I have been let down yet again by someone I love.
> I'm sad that I spend too much time, effort and energy on people only to get nothing in return.
> I'm sad that I am 36 weeks pregnant and although I have lots of lovely friends, I have no family of my own to share this with.
> I'm sad that the girl I call my family is more interested in getting drunk and spending £20 a week on wine than £50 on return flights to Belfast in August, despite promising me she was coming.
> I'm sad that she is going to spend money on her friend's baby's christening, but still not come here as promised.
> I'm sad that when I tried to talk to her about it she told me I was out of order!!
> 
> (She was recently prosecuted for Benefit Fraud and is going to lose her benefits and have to pay the money falsely claimed back. I pity her but it is her own fault! I understand she has no money now, but if she has enough to buy wine and get drunk, and go to see other people's babies, are there no cutbacks anywhere she could make to come and see mine, like promised?!?!?!)
> 
> I'm fed up of loving people more than they love me.
> 
> And I am fed up of being so desperate to have people to call family that I put up with shit all of the time.



Bexy you don't know me from Adam so what i say might or might not mean a whole lot. You have so many surrogate family members on this site and many of us can even be your surrogate mom. My own daughter is due with her second baby at nearly the same time you are and often when im thinking of her due date , you pop into my mind as well and i wonder how you are doing and how you are handling the upcoming event. I come from a small family , the only child of an only child. I was not close to my mom, my grandparents died before most of my kids were born so it was just me and my ex. No family on my side at all. I promise you that the child you carry will be the filler to the hole in your heart. You will have your family , the child will be the center of your universe until you die. Plus you have us here at Dims, moms, dads, uncles, aunts, bratty brothers and sisters and even grandparents. No we are'nt there physically but we are there through this amazing technology. Webcams, microphones, telephones, i mean can you imagine how big your family really is? Please focus on the one inside you and the one beside you. They and we are in your corner and waiting for you to share your life with us. Heck i can always use more grandchildren.


----------



## sugar and spice

This is beautifully said, and I agree 100%. Bexy we are all here for you and very happy and excited for you and George.:wubu:


----------



## JoyJoy

A little over a year ago, I answered an ad on the local Freecycle from a woman who was wanting to find a home for her cat. I called the lady and we talked a bit, then made arrangements to meet, and for me to meet the cat. We ended up talking for over an hour about stuff, and found out that she is a business associate of one of my best friends - small world. I took the cat, but she has called every few months to check on him, and brought her 6 yr old daughter over to see him and play with him a couple of times (he was her daughter's first cat and they only gave him to me because they had to move and couldn't take him with them). She was always very upbeat and cheerful..just a pleasant person to know. 

I just found out that she and her daughter were found dead yesterday, both shot to death. They're saying that she killed her daughter, and then herself. Everyone who knew her, though, is saying that's impossible. Her closest friends just can't believe that this woman could have done something like this. That very morning, she was cheerful and laughing with her friends...and then this. Everyone I've talked to who knew her said it just feels very fishy. It's all so very heartbreaking.


----------



## Surlysomething

JoyJoy said:


> A little over a year ago, I answered an ad on the local Freecycle from a woman who was wanting to find a home for her cat. I called the lady and we talked a bit, then made arrangements to meet, and for me to meet the cat. We ended up talking for over an hour about stuff, and found out that she is a business associate of one of my best friends - small world. I took the cat, but she has called every few months to check on him, and brought her 6 yr old daughter over to see him and play with him a couple of times (he was her daughter's first cat and they only gave him to me because they had to move and couldn't take him with them). She was always very upbeat and cheerful..just a pleasant person to know.
> 
> I just found out that she and her daughter were found dead yesterday, both shot to death. They're saying that she killed her daughter, and then herself. Everyone who knew her, though, is saying that's impossible. Her closest friends just can't believe that this woman could have done something like this. That very morning, she was cheerful and laughing with her friends...and then this. Everyone I've talked to who knew her said it just feels very fishy. It's all so very heartbreaking.



Oh hell, Joy, that's so awful.  I hope they come up with some real answers fast. It really does sound fishy.

So sorry.


----------



## ladle

So little time left in the US..
But off to Europe is a small consolation :happy:


----------



## bexy

cinnamitch said:


> Bexy you don't know me from Adam so what i say might or might not mean a whole lot. You have so many surrogate family members on this site and many of us can even be your surrogate mom. My own daughter is due with her second baby at nearly the same time you are and often when im thinking of her due date , you pop into my mind as well and i wonder how you are doing and how you are handling the upcoming event. I come from a small family , the only child of an only child. I was not close to my mom, my grandparents died before most of my kids were born so it was just me and my ex. No family on my side at all. I promise you that the child you carry will be the filler to the hole in your heart. You will have your family , the child will be the center of your universe until you die. Plus you have us here at Dims, moms, dads, uncles, aunts, bratty brothers and sisters and even grandparents. No we are'nt there physically but we are there through this amazing technology. Webcams, microphones, telephones, i mean can you imagine how big your family really is? Please focus on the one inside you and the one beside you. They and we are in your corner and waiting for you to share your life with us. Heck i can always use more grandchildren.





sugar and spice said:


> This is beautifully said, and I agree 100%. Bexy we are all here for you and very happy and excited for you and George.:wubu:




Thank you both so, so much. xox



JoyJoy said:


> A little over a year ago, I answered an ad on the local Freecycle from a woman who was wanting to find a home for her cat. I called the lady and we talked a bit, then made arrangements to meet, and for me to meet the cat. We ended up talking for over an hour about stuff, and found out that she is a business associate of one of my best friends - small world. I took the cat, but she has called every few months to check on him, and brought her 6 yr old daughter over to see him and play with him a couple of times (he was her daughter's first cat and they only gave him to me because they had to move and couldn't take him with them). She was always very upbeat and cheerful..just a pleasant person to know.
> 
> I just found out that she and her daughter were found dead yesterday, both shot to death. They're saying that she killed her daughter, and then herself. Everyone who knew her, though, is saying that's impossible. Her closest friends just can't believe that this woman could have done something like this. That very morning, she was cheerful and laughing with her friends...and then this. Everyone I've talked to who knew her said it just feels very fishy. It's all so very heartbreaking.



Joy that is so awful. I am so sorry. Hopefully they will get to the bottom of it all soon. x


----------



## sugar and spice

JoyJoy said:


> A little over a year ago, I answered an ad on the local Freecycle from a woman who was wanting to find a home for her cat. I called the lady and we talked a bit, then made arrangements to meet, and for me to meet the cat. We ended up talking for over an hour about stuff, and found out that she is a business associate of one of my best friends - small world. I took the cat, but she has called every few months to check on him, and brought her 6 yr old daughter over to see him and play with him a couple of times (he was her daughter's first cat and they only gave him to me because they had to move and couldn't take him with them). She was always very upbeat and cheerful..just a pleasant person to know.
> 
> I just found out that she and her daughter were found dead yesterday, both shot to death. They're saying that she killed her daughter, and then herself. Everyone who knew her, though, is saying that's impossible. Her closest friends just can't believe that this woman could have done something like this. That very morning, she was cheerful and laughing with her friends...and then this. Everyone I've talked to who knew her said it just feels very fishy. It's all so very heartbreaking.



This is so tragic, It just boggles the mind if indeed it was a murder suicide.


----------



## mel

I really miss my daughter.


----------



## BarbBBW

mel said:


> I really miss my daughter.



aww Mel I am sorry to hear that 
you can borrow mine!! she is 7 and really cute!


----------



## mel

BarbBBW said:


> aww Mel I am sorry to hear that
> you can borrow mine!! she is 7 and really cute!




 aww thanks!! as long as she isnt a teen yet that will work ..lol. Luckily I will get see her in about 4 weeks. 

*being a mother is the hardest job in the world*


----------



## sirumberto

Despite the fact that I've had weeks to brace for this, I'm still feeling like I'm in shock.

Pending the paperwork, my marriage of 5+ years is over.

I'm not sure why I'm even bringing this up here, but it certainly fits the theme of the thread.

Umm... yeah. Thanks for listening... or reading... or whatever.


----------



## OneWickedAngel

sirumberto said:


> Despite the fact that I've had weeks to brace for this, I'm still feeling like I'm in shock.
> 
> Pending the paperwork, my marriage of 5+ years is over.
> 
> I'm not sure why I'm even bringing this up here, but it certainly fits the theme of the thread.
> 
> Umm... yeah. Thanks for listening... or reading... or whatever.



*
Umberto,

For whatever reasons your marriage ended, it did in fact END. Almost any ending between two people is going to be tinged with some level of loss, even when "it is for the best". You have every right to feel to feel the sadness of that loss and this was perfect thread to say it.*


----------



## mergirl

On Monday i was walking along the shore with my Friend and her mum and wee sister who were visiting from sweden. We saw a seagull who was lying on the street bleeding and struggling to get up. I called the S.S.P.C.A to come and help it. I waited two hours for them to come. I gave it water, defended it from passing dogs and gave it healing energies and also got anoyed at all the people who said just to kill it and put it in the bin. Eventually the animal ambulance came and took it away. Yesterday My friend txd me and asked how the bird was because i said i would call the animal sanctuary and find out. I never lie but her wee sister is only 8 and i didnt want to make her upset so i said that he just had a broken wing and would heal soon and be back with his friends soon. I found out today that he had to be put to sleep. I can't tell my friend..and i don't know why i felt so sad. Maby it was because When i found the bird someone said "oh yeah i saw that being hit by a car 3 hours ago"!! Sometimes I feel like i could give up on humans!! I cryed a bit.. also i feel weird for lying because i never do... My friends wee sister was just so happy that she might have saved an animals life i just couldnt say.. "well actually he died".. I think also, out of all the problems this is a small thing.. but it made me sad today anyway..


----------



## furious styles

i managed to throw my back out incredibly bad somehow. can't .. move ..


----------



## mossystate

Aw, mer...that is heartbreaking, and outrageous that nobody did anything. 

That little birdie had you on its side for a few hours. That had to have comforted him.... a lot. You are good people.


----------



## BarbBBW

I miss chatting with a certain SOMONE who is BUSY!! uGH


----------



## mel

sirumberto said:


> Despite the fact that I've had weeks to brace for this, I'm still feeling like I'm in shock.
> 
> Pending the paperwork, my marriage of 5+ years is over.
> 
> I'm not sure why I'm even bringing this up here, but it certainly fits the theme of the thread.
> 
> Umm... yeah. Thanks for listening... or reading... or whatever.




I'm sorry  I know it is hard but you have try to keep positive and know that there is someone else out there for you and you will be loved. I hope you have great friends and a supportive family/network 



furious styles said:


> i managed to throw my back out incredibly bad somehow. can't .. move ..



Ouch!! so sorry to hear this. Try to get some rest and I hope this gets better really soon!



BarbBBW said:


> I miss chatting with a certain SOMONE who is BUSY!! uGH




Maybe that someone will have an opening in the bust schedule and chat ya up soon


----------



## BarbBBW

mel said:


> I
> 
> Maybe that someone will have an opening in the bust schedule and chat ya up soon


aww thank you hunny! you are the best! i hope so


----------



## chocolate desire

I am sad because someone I care about very much just does not seem to notice it or perhaps they simply don't care


----------



## OneWickedAngel

mergirl said:


> On Monday i was walking along the shore with my Friend and her mum and wee sister who were visiting from sweden. We saw a seagull who was lying on the street bleeding and struggling to get up.
> ...snip...
> .. I think also, out of all the problems this is a small thing.. but it made me sad today anyway..


Some members of the human race are truly not worthy of the title. Mer you did the right thing on all counts. There's going to enough ugliness coming to that little girl as a natural part of life. On Monday she learned something more important. How a human being is suppose to act, respect and care for a living being in need. Someday much later you may tell her the truth, or she may figure it out on her own. For now, she can do without it. You put a lot of yourself into trying to comfort and save the bird. You're untitled to your anger at the uncaring members of our species as you are of the overall sadness for it.



furious styles said:


> i managed to throw my back out incredibly bad somehow. can't .. move ..


Damn, I'm pressuming you've been given something. I hope you feel better - at least functional - fast.



BarbBBW said:


> I miss chatting with a certain SOMONE who is BUSY!! uGH



Awww, poor thing.


----------



## thejuicyone

I'm sad that I don't see OWA around as much as I used too, mainly when we flirted with each other though.


----------



## sirumberto

mel said:


> I'm sorry  I know it is hard but you have try to keep positive and know that there is someone else out there for you and you will be loved. I hope you have great friends and a supportive family/network



Thanks for the kind words. I do have a great support network actually. I have a wonderful friend who is doing her level best to keep me busy, and a mother who is doing the whole motherly thing and making sure I eat, etc.

I know I'll be alright. It just hit me pretty hard this morning.


----------



## Paquito

I'm sad because I truly feel alone in this world, despite the amazing friends I have. Even though I love them dearly, not a day goes by that I feel guarded and incapable of letting someone actually get to know all of me, not just the surface. I guess I feel like no one will care.

I fear that I don't have what it takes to make it in this world and I'm gonna fail at college, work, etc.

And the one I love will never feel the same about me.


----------



## steely

Feeling underappreciated.....


----------



## LoveBHMS

Awful abandonment issues.

Unrequited love.

Losses of friendship.


----------



## Red_Men

I am sad because I fell in love with an FFA that opened my heart up to the bright side of being fat, and she can't love me back because she doesn't want to try any relationship with any sort of distance after her previous one. I went to her house yesterday and I held her for several hours, and I felt happy, then when I went home and thought about how she doesn't love me back, I felt like shit. She is home for the summer from college, and I am attending a local one, and I should hopefully be going to the same school as her in the spring or the following school year at the latest. But until then, I am to be all alone with my thoughts and my shitty pillows that don't feel like her or smell like her or do anything to help fill the void. And that's enough womanly garbage from me for now. That is why I am sad.


----------



## mergirl

Red_Men said:


> I am sad because I fell in love with an FFA that opened my heart up to the bright side of being fat, and she can't love me back because she doesn't want to try any relationship with any sort of distance after her previous one. I went to her house yesterday and I held her for several hours, and I felt happy, then when I went home and thought about how she doesn't love me back, I felt like shit. She is home for the summer from college, and I am attending a local one, and I should hopefully be going to the same school as her in the spring or the following school year at the latest. But until then, I am to be all alone with my thoughts and my shitty pillows that don't feel like her or smell like her or do anything to help fill the void. And that's enough womanly garbage from me for now. That is why I am sad.


You will find someone much better soon i promise! There are Lots of FFa's here that are total sluts so just take your pic!  lmao
only joking ladies..




shhhh...not really..


----------



## Cors

Saying goodbye to a substantial chunk of the wardrobe I once worked so hard for... 

No point keeping fun colours and super-feminine styles I will never wear, slutty hostess gowns and dominatrix gear, other items that I have clearly grown out of or are too big to be properly altered, gifts from people I no longer love and generally stuff that deserve to be shown off more.


----------



## debz-aka

The job market it making me crazy sad! I've been unemployed since January and right now I feel like my B.A. is the equivalent of a high school diploma! Crazy sad times!


----------



## Red_Men

mergirl said:


> You will find someone much better soon i promise! There are Lots of FFa's here that are total sluts so just take your pic!  lmao
> only joking ladies..
> 
> 
> 
> 
> shhhh...not really..



if only i could believe that


----------



## BarbBBW

Red_Men said:


> if only i could believe that



me me me me:bounce: she is right! I am a total slut,.. but I am married  sorry:doh:


----------



## Red_Men

ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh


----------



## luscious_lulu

She is a shameless flirt and a lot of fun though.... 
Both are qualities I greatly admire


----------



## Tania

I am a fearful, cold, unresponsive fantasy-ruiner. I fail at relationships. I even fail at the rebound. Or maybe these things fail me - I'm still too close to the eye of the proverbial emo shitstorm to have much perspective at the moment.

Worst of all is the continual rediscovery that love is rarer than we lead ourselves to believe and that desire is rampant, dangerous, and leads people (mainly boys) to say and do shit they regret later. And that still fucking hurts my goddamn feelings, even though I should probably know better by now after 22 years of near perpetual disappointment. Why do emotions have to be so damn complicated? Why do I always feel like I have to apologize for giving a shit? This is madness. 

It also makes me sad and angry that I'm enough of a douchebag to whine about it all on the internet, but if I didn't need some sort of semi-anonymous venting mechanism, I promise I wouldn't have posted this shit. I was kind of hoping I'd be over all this by now, but I'm not. 

Sorry. I guess I fail at that too.


----------



## Red_Men

Tania said:


> I am a fearful, cold, unresponsive fantasy-ruiner. I fail at relationships. I even fail at the rebound. Or maybe these things fail me - I'm still too close to the eye of the proverbial emo shitstorm to have much perspective at the moment.
> 
> Worst of all is the continual rediscovery that love is rarer than we lead ourselves to believe and that desire is rampant, dangerous, and leads people (mainly boys) to say and do shit they regret later. And that still fucking hurts my goddamn feelings, even though I should probably know better by now after 22 years of near perpetual disappointment. Why do emotions have to be so damn complicated? Why do I always feel like I have to apologize for giving a shit? This is madness.
> 
> It also makes me sad and angry that I'm enough of a douchebag to whine about it all on the internet, but if I didn't need some sort of semi-anonymous venting mechanism, I promise I wouldn't have posted this shit. I was kind of hoping I'd be over all this by now, but I'm not.
> 
> Sorry. I guess I fail at that too.




<3 my female counterpart


----------



## Paquito

Tania said:


> I am a fearful, cold, unresponsive fantasy-ruiner. I fail at relationships. I even fail at the rebound. Or maybe these things fail me - I'm still too close to the eye of the proverbial emo shitstorm to have much perspective at the moment.
> 
> Worst of all is the continual rediscovery that love is rarer than we lead ourselves to believe and that desire is rampant, dangerous, and leads people (mainly boys) to say and do shit they regret later. And that still fucking hurts my goddamn feelings, even though I should probably know better by now after 22 years of near perpetual disappointment. Why do emotions have to be so damn complicated? Why do I always feel like I have to apologize for giving a shit? This is madness.
> 
> It also makes me sad and angry that I'm enough of a douchebag to whine about it all on the internet, but if I didn't need some sort of semi-anonymous venting mechanism, I promise I wouldn't have posted this shit. I was kind of hoping I'd be over all this by now, but I'm not.
> 
> Sorry. I guess I fail at that too.



+1

Sometimes I wish I could just turn off my emotions


----------



## mergirl

I felt like that for a long time too..less so now..Though i have been told i am too emotional. I think its better to feel and for it to hurt than to not feel and to feel the same everyday though. Though, when i used to feel particularaly up and down i might have thought differently.


----------



## BarbBBW

Tania said:


> I am a fearful, cold, unresponsive fantasy-ruiner. I fail at relationships. I even fail at the rebound. Or maybe these things fail me - I'm still too close to the eye of the proverbial emo shitstorm to have much perspective at the moment.
> 
> Worst of all is the continual rediscovery that love is rarer than we lead ourselves to believe and that desire is rampant, dangerous, and leads people (mainly boys) to say and do shit they regret later. And that still fucking hurts my goddamn feelings, even though I should probably know better by now after 22 years of near perpetual disappointment. Why do emotions have to be so damn complicated? Why do I always feel like I have to apologize for giving a shit? This is madness.
> 
> It also makes me sad and angry that I'm enough of a douchebag to whine about it all on the internet, but if I didn't need some sort of semi-anonymous venting mechanism, I promise I wouldn't have posted this shit. I was kind of hoping I'd be over all this by now, but I'm not.
> 
> Sorry. I guess I fail at that too.





Red_Men said:


> <3 my female counterpart



Both of you need to STOP dating people, and start looking within yourself. Explore yourselves completely. Find out what it is that makes you happy, what in a mate makes you happy. STart by Loving yourselves, respecting yourselves and realize how wonderful , as a person, you are. I believe before dating anyone, you need to connect with "you" first. Once you see all the goodness in yourselves, and you can express that thru your walk, talk, the way you poise yourself, in pure confidence,.... I know the interactions with the opposite sex will improve. You can be gorgeous on the outside, but if you dont know how awesome you really are on the inside, it doesnt matter. Allow yourselves to be in a great relationship. Start working on "YOU" from the inside


----------



## Red_Men

I don't ever date people, I have only been on a handful of dates my entire life due to me somewhat despising such an activity, and I already know I'm a great person and that I spread my awesomeness to women I talk to by being the best guy they have ever met but won't ever have due to them either already being taken, not liking fat guys, or being too stupid to see what a good deal they have come across. I am only depressed over this one person you see, that is quite fucked up in the head, and it has spread to me now.


----------



## leener38

While I feel I'm too old to indulge in fantasies about perfect dates, I still want one. And lemme tell ya: Online dating is not for me!

What makes me sad right now? Someone I thought a friend just got laid off. To make matters worse, she blames me and our boss, rather than the corporate machine that churned out a letter saying her position should be terminated. Not she herself; they didn't call her by name. But she thinks it was personal. Then I get to hear from elsewhere that she's upset I got to keep my job.

I want nothing but to stuff myself for the three days I have off work, now I'm a little too depressed and self-conscious to do it. That should be a motivator, right?

*sigh*


----------



## leener38

Mmm. Yes. Dating bad. Eating good!


----------



## mossystate

Red_Men said:


> I don't ever date people, I have only been on a handful of dates my entire life due to me somewhat despising such an activity, and I already know I'm a great person and that* I spread my awesomeness to women I talk to by being the best guy they have ever met *but won't ever have due to them either already being taken, not liking fat guys, or *being too stupid to see what a good deal they have come across*. I am only depressed over this one person you see, that is quite fucked up in the head, and it has spread to me now.



You should know that quality women are not impressed by men who crow about being the best any woman could hope for ( she is the one who decides who is best )..and calling those women stupid...not a move that will get you dates.


----------



## Red_Men

Do you honestly think I tell them up front how great I am? I let them figure that out on their own just by talking to me, and as I already said, not really one for dating, it's a waste of time in my own opinion


----------



## mossystate

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.


----------



## Red_Men

hmmmmm ? ? ? ? ?


----------



## OneWickedAngel

Red_Men said:


> Do you honestly think I tell them up front how great I am? I let them figure that out on their own just by talking to me, and as I already said, not really one for dating, it's a waste of time in my own opinion


*A healthy ego and confidence in yourself are fine, but wow. Is there any room left to find something awesome with someone else when you're so in love with your own awesomeness?*


----------



## BarbBBW

I was just trying to give some advice that would have hopefully helped ,.. sorry


----------



## mossystate

OneWickedAngel said:


> *A healthy ego and confidence in yourself are fine, but wow. Is there any room left to find something awesome with someone else when you're so in love with your own awesomeness?*



Oh, hush with your womanly garbage.


----------



## luscious_lulu

BarbBBW said:


> I was just trying to give some advice that would have hopefully helped ,.. sorry



It was very good advice. *hugs*


----------



## Red_Men

Nah, my loneliness counterbalances what a good person I know I am, so yeah, everything works out and I'm still all alone, but hey, who doesn't have a sad life?


----------



## Red_Men

luscious_lulu said:


> It was very good advice. *hugs*




it was, no hard feelings


----------



## sirumberto

BarbBBW said:


> Both of you need to STOP dating people, and start looking within yourself. Explore yourselves completely. Find out what it is that makes you happy, what in a mate makes you happy. STart by Loving yourselves, respecting yourselves and realize how wonderful , as a person, you are. I believe before dating anyone, you need to connect with "you" first. Once you see all the goodness in yourselves, and you can express that thru your walk, talk, the way you poise yourself, in pure confidence,.... I know the interactions with the opposite sex will improve. You can be gorgeous on the outside, but if you dont know how awesome you really are on the inside, it doesnt matter. Allow yourselves to be in a great relationship. Start working on "YOU" from the inside



Cheers pretty lady! This is quite relevant to me as well right now. Today is the first day I've been looking forward to this rather than dreading it.

I'm in the mood for a good adventure, and what could be a crazier adventure than a journey to the center of myself.

That or I'm just tired of external drama. Either or.


----------



## JohnWylde

I do miss my girl friend.

I think its even worse when I watch Serena Williams playing at Wimbledon when she reminds me so much of Her.

I hope She misses me too.




chocolate desire said:


> I am sad because someone I care about very much just does not seem to notice it or perhaps they simply don't care


----------



## luscious_lulu

Red_Men said:


> it was, no hard feelings



and I was making a friend feel better about something she did out of concern, but was made to feel bad because of it.


----------



## BarbBBW

luscious_lulu said:


> and I was making a friend feel better about something she did out of concern, but was made to feel bad because of it.



thank you my Lu Lu  Muahhhh

Red,... play nice LOL


----------



## KnottyOne

It is 10 PM on the 4th of July and I am sober. DAMN YOU WORK!!!!!!


----------



## JerseyGirl07093

KnottyOne said:


> It is 10 PM on the 4th of July and I am sober. DAMN YOU WORK!!!!!!



Well, there's always tomorrow...
Didn't know that tomorrow is a holiday too? Of course it is, it's my birthday! lol
Use that as an excuse to party!:bow:


----------



## KnottyOne

JerseyGirl07093 said:


> Well, there's always tomorrow...
> Didn't know that tomorrow is a holiday too? Of course it is, it's my birthday! lol
> Use that as an excuse to party!:bow:



I would if I didn't open >_<. But I will be in jersey for a party tomorrow night so I will def throw one back in honor of your birthday


----------



## Tracii

I was driving home today and ran over a bunny.I felt so bad cause I love bunnies.
I have a lots of bunnies in my yard during the evenings and I sit out there and feed them lettuce and fruit all the time.
They even come up to my back porch thats how much they trust me.
I try so hard not to hit animals when driving and do watch for them at night.
I feel so bad about what happened.


----------



## mel

pissed more than sad..but I cant stand when people just verbally make you feel like shit and then say "I am sorry" ..and think that "sorry" makes it all ok. then on top of it..having to make decisions about plain ol dirty freakin shi*!!


----------



## BarbBBW

wanted to go back out tonight, but something happened and they called the gathering off,.. now i am sad!


----------



## kittencat

I am sad because I really want to see 16 Volt and Cyanotic on the 9th but i have work early the next morning.And i cant go in too work all sloppy and half assed.SO im not sure ill be able to make it so im sad about that.


----------



## Tanuki

I miss my girlfriend so much, she is really poorly right now and I cant comfort her ; _ ;


----------



## mel

T-Bear said:


> I miss my girlfriend so much, she is really poorly right now and I cant comfort her ; _ ;





awww..maybe something soon will change..hugssssssss


----------



## Mathias

I can't visit my friends from college.


----------



## mel

Mathias said:


> I can't visit my friends from college.



sorry ((((((hugs)))))...maybe they will surprise you


----------



## Gingembre

My cat has got a tumour in her mouth under her tongue. Even if it's not cancerous it's inoperable and she might only live for another month or 2. She's only 9


----------



## The Fez

just watched pixar's 'Up'

Most. Depressing. Film. EVER*




*with regards to animated films that're geared to kids and adults alike


seriously, the first ten minutes is a total sad-fest if nothing else. Fantastic film though.


----------



## sugar and spice

Gingembre said:


> My cat has got a tumour in her mouth under her tongue. Even if it's not cancerous it's inoperable and she might only live for another month or 2. She's only 9



I'm so sorry  I am still grieving for my kitty Lily who died suddenly last year, she was only 6. Hugs to you and your sweet kitty girl.


----------



## HottiMegan

I am so sad for my dear friend. She lost her baby a week before her due date in December and now she just lost another baby.  It so saddening, she's so deserving of a baby that survives.


----------



## bigbob10000

I just found out one of my old girl friends that I almost married now lives in a $500,000 home which here is a about 6,000 sqft and very nice. And here I sit a year later today (7-10-2008) after having a tumor removed from my head and loosing hearing in my right ear because of it. I still have very bad headaches and take 10 to 12 ibuprofens a day everyday since the surgery. They tell me that the headaches should stop after a year, well it's a year and they are still very bad, not as bad as they were. I can not so a lot of activities that I used to because my right inner ear is disconnected since the tumor was on one of the nerves to the inner ear and they took out both nerves to my right inner ear, so my balance is bad but I can drive, but not drive my drag race car(it makes me dizzy now).


BooHoo 


BigBob10000


----------



## BarbBBW

bigbob10000 said:


> I just found out one of my old girl friends that I almost married now lives in a $500,000 home which here is a about 6,000 sqft and very nice. And here I sit a year later today (7-10-2008) after having a tumor removed from my head and loosing hearing in my right ear because of it. I still have very bad headaches and take 10 to 12 ibuprofens a day everyday since the surgery. They tell me that the headaches should stop after a year, well it's a year and they are still very bad, not as bad as they were. I can not so a lot of activities that I used to because my right inner ear is disconnected since the tumor was on one of the nerves to the inner ear and they took out both nerves to my right inner ear, so my balance is bad but I can drive, but not drive my drag race car(it makes me dizzy now).
> 
> 
> BooHoo
> 
> 
> 
> BigBob10000



well babe i am very sorry to hear that. But they say everything happens for a reason. wel all live and learn and it sounds like even though u are goin thru hell, it sounds like, you still are alive and are blessed!!


----------



## goodthings

I am very sad because I just bought my first home and my mom is not here to share the experience with me, i am sad because the last live link i had with her is going to be lost this weekend and i am sad that my supposed best friend is too busy with a new boyfriend to take time for me when i need her.


----------



## italianmike21

going to sleep without my special someone


----------



## BarbBBW

italianmike21 said:


> that im going to bed alone



you are more than welcome over here Mike


----------



## italianmike21

No thanks I have a fantastic girlfriend who would offer that


----------



## KFD

I got stationed in Gulfport Mississippi. If I didn't go to dive school, I would be back in southern california, where i belong. My life, my little girl (who is five), and all my crap is in Calizona. Dammit!!! :doh:

KFD


----------



## DeniseW

back home from a wonderful vacation, nuff said!!!


----------



## steely

I'm really missing someone and have been for a long time.


----------



## Ernest Nagel

I miss having someone to take care of and do things for.


----------



## Sugar

italianmike21 said:


> going to sleep without my special someone



I wish I was there...:kiss2:


----------



## italianmike21

Lucky said:


> I wish I was there...:kiss2:


Soon! I've been counting the days


----------



## BarbBBW

italianmike21 said:


> No thanks I have a fantastic girlfriend who would offer that



didnt mean to step on toes, was just joking with ya


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

Is upset that a certain someone won't talk to me anymore..I am sorry! I hope you know that! I really am! Life sucks right now!


----------



## Sugar

I'm sad that one of the few people I called friends blew me off yesterday. I feel like never talking to him again.


----------



## GoldenDelicious

goodthings said:


> I am very sad because I just bought my first home and my mom is not here to share the experience with me, i am sad because the last live link i had with her is going to be lost this weekend and i am sad that my supposed best friend is too busy with a new boyfriend to take time for me when i need her.


Where is your mum? Has she passed away?


----------



## pdesil071189

That I'm no longer a Teenager


----------



## Rowan

Sad that I won't get to see Mike again for another week and a half, and today i was struck by particularly strong feelings of missing him. *pout*


----------



## CAMellie

I'm sad that certain days in our lives cant be re-lived...so that things can be undone and things can be unsaid.


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

CAMellie said:


> I'm sad that certain days in our lives cant be re-lived...so that things can be undone and things can be unsaid.


I agree with you a 100% I feel that way right now too! Sorry hon. ((hugs))


----------



## thejuicyone

My relationships slow demise.


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

Aww (((Juicy)))


----------



## BarbBBW

thejuicyone said:


> My relationships slow demise.



you are young dont get bogged down baby!!


----------



## Spanky

BarbBBW said:


> you are young dont get bogged down baby!!



Barb, you need to get to Alabama and take her shopping for an afternoon. 

Get to it!

Maybe you both get a coupla tattoos.


----------



## BarbBBW

Spanky said:


> Barb, you need to get to Alabama and take her shopping for an afternoon.
> 
> Get to it!
> 
> Maybe you both get a coupla tattoos.



i so agree babe!!


----------



## blueeyedevie

Sad that I can't have my dogie with me In New York.. I miss her so badly it hurts.


----------



## steely

My blood sugar dropped really low and now I'm just so weepy and sad.


----------



## HottiMegan

i haven't had a decent night sleep since getting pregnant with Alex. THat's nearly 2 years of fatigue. Alex still wont go to sleep well at night. Even when i restrict his naps.. I loved how well Max slept as a baby.


----------



## Tanuki

My Girlfriend broke up with me today...


----------



## GoldenDelicious

T-Bear said:


> My Girlfriend broke up with me today...


I'm really sorry to hear that. I told Mergirl and she is sending you hugs xx


----------



## Still a Skye fan

My July vacation plans fell apart on me yesterday.

Yeah, I know this all seems trivial compared to most of the other problems mentioned here but I'm bummed out today.

I'm still taking the time off from work and I'll just do something else.


Dennis


----------



## steely

Still a Skye fan said:


> My July vacation plans fell apart on me yesterday.
> 
> Yeah, I know this all seems trivial compared to most of the other problems mentioned here but I'm bummed out today.
> 
> I'm still taking the time off from work and I'll just do something else.
> 
> 
> Dennis



That's disappointing, sorry to hear that.


----------



## Surlysomething

T-Bear said:


> My Girlfriend broke up with me today...




 -big hug-


----------



## thejuicyone

BarbBBW said:


> you are young dont get bogged down baby!!



I know, but I loved him a lot, I mean he was a big part of my life for almost a year. Heartbreak is the absolute worst. And I agree with Spanky, you should totally come down here and go shopping with me.


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

T-Bear said:


> My Girlfriend broke up with me today...


Aww (((T-Bear))) Sad news for sure!


----------



## BarbBBW

thejuicyone said:


> I know, but I loved him a lot, I mean he was a big part of my life for almost a year. Heartbreak is the absolute worst. And I agree with Spanky, you should totally come down here and go shopping with me.



aww baby-girl If i could I so would!!, Getting into LTR young in age always leads to heartbreak. SUCKS but true! But the good thing is u learn alot from them and when you are ready to move on you have alot you knowledge under your belt for the "next" special man in your life. Its takes alot of time but you are a strong woman!! you are always welcome here in AZ with me babe!! anytime! Muahhhh


----------



## thejuicyone

BarbBBW said:


> aww baby-girl If i could I so would!!, Getting into LTR young in age always leads to heartbreak. SUCKS but true! But the good thing is u learn alot from them and when you are ready to move on you have alot you knowledge under your belt for the "next" special man in your life. Its takes alot of time but you are a strong woman!! you are always welcome here in AZ with me babe!! anytime! Muahhhh



I know that's true, I have learnt a lot about myself and men from this relationship. But, thank you for the kind words barb, I heart you!


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

Got a not so great phone call last night with some not so great news..Kinda down about it..


----------



## Tanuki

GoldenDelicious said:


> I'm really sorry to hear that. I told Mergirl and she is sending you hugs xx





Surlysomething said:


> -big hug-





EllorionsDarlingAngel said:


> Aww (((T-Bear))) Sad news for sure!



Thanks ever so much for the hugs everyone, they made me smile xxx


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

T-Bear said:


> Thanks ever so much for the hugs everyone, they made me smile xxx


Good I am glad I could help make you smile!


----------



## BarbBBW

I went to the pool today with my daughter and 2 of her friends. SO thats the good part, then I saw these 2 BBW,.. there separately there with people.

They were wearing like full dresses in the pool with a bathing suit underneath it. I felt sad for them. Why do that to yourself? Why cover up soooo much that you are going into a pool fully dressed? I just wanted to go up to them and tell then how beautiful and perfect their bodies were, and not to cover up so much that they cant even move in the water. I so wanted to tell then this, but I couldnt, I didnt know how they would take it?! Maybe be pissed, or feel even more insecure about how they looked? I didnt know what to do. So i just went by them several times and smiled big and said hi.
Makes me so very sad that BBW still have to feel like their bodies arent "good enough" to be seen in public. That some of us feel like we should hide it all under big clothes and long shirts, long dresses etc. Makes me sad they may never have that great feeling of being yourself,.. no matter what you wear in public. 
I think its alot of women like those 2 special BBW would benefit immensely from a website like *"DIMS"* To feel the love, support and confidence we all share here. I think If I see them again at the pool I will give them the website info, and tell them how beautiful BBW are and that there are so many people in this world that think that way too!!


----------



## mossystate

When you say full dresses, are you talking about like a swimsuit coverup, or a Little House On The Prairie dress. 

Yeah, I don't think saying something would have been a smart move on your part. I guess everybody gets to be comfy. Comfy can mean different things to different people. Maybe they were being...themselves. I agree that swimming is best done with not so much fabric.....and, if they truly did want to be wearing less, it is a sad thing, but, taking notice of someone who _might be_ uncomfortable ( perhaps not how you would live your life, but then, we all have to be allowed how we choose to live ) was a smart and kind thing on your part.

I would careful about giving website info to strangers. If they ask you about how you get comfy wearing less to the pool, or start a conversation that leads to such talk...then...maybe. Confidence is not defined one way, nor should it be.


----------



## BarbBBW

mossystate said:


> When you say full dresses, are you talking about like a swimsuit coverup, or a Little House On The Prairie dress.
> 
> Yeah, I don't think saying something would have been a smart move on your part. I guess everybody gets to be comfy. Comfy can mean different things to different people. Maybe they were being...themselves. I agree that swimming is best done with not so much fabric.....and, if they truly did want to be wearing less, it is a sad thing, but, taking notice of someone who _might be_ uncomfortable ( perhaps not how you would live your life, but then, we all have to be allowed how we choose to live ) was a smart and kind thing on your part.
> 
> I would careful about giving website info to strangers. If they ask you about how you get comfy wearing less to the pool, or start a conversation that leads to such talk...then...maybe. Confidence is not defined one way, nor should it be.



they were like sundresses, like long to there ankles lol. not just swim covers ups , although I see alot of bbw with those too. Just made me sad for them. Yes and I agree maybe I will just be nice and smile with them if i see them again, I guess we so what we all can when we are ready. :bow:


----------



## mossystate

BarbBBW said:


> they were like sundresses, like long to there ankles lol. not just swim covers ups , although I see alot of bbw with those too. Just made me sad for them. Yes and I agree maybe I will just be nice and smile with them if i see them again, I guess we so what we all can when we are ready. :bow:



Hmmmmm. Wonder if it was some religious thing. Hell, unless they look miserable...no smiling...etc...look at it as a personal choice. Maybe they are trying to set a new trend....make swimming a mega workout. I think being here makes people so suspect of anything that does not look like how fat people are supposed to act and live. Sounds like the ' outside ' world. Were they with men...and were the men wearing Speedos?...cuz that would be wild.


----------



## BarbBBW

mossystate said:


> Hmmmmm. Wonder if it was some religious thing. Hell, unless they look miserable...no smiling...etc...look at it as a personal choice. Maybe they are trying to set a new trend....make swimming a mega workout. I think being here makes people so suspect of anything that does not look like how fat people are supposed to act and live. Sounds like the ' outside ' world. Were they with men...and were the men wearing Speedos?...cuz that would be wild.



they looked comfy just sitting there on the side of the pool... the pool chairs are low and dont look like they hold much,.. I was scared to sit in them for like a year LOL. Once you get in the lounge chairs its hard to get outta them. ANyways,.. they went in the pool,.. and got out,.. looking uncomfortable,.. dress sticking to them everywhere and they couldnt walk without moving it off them. So the one BBW , was with a skinny chick and a guy,.. no speedos LOL. they other was with her little girl. I dunno if they were , as I am describing them, as you are saying . Just , as a bbw i saw it that way,... sad. If its a new trend I am never doing it hahaha.


----------



## TraciJo67

I wear a long t-shirt over my swimsuit when I am in the pool. It has nothing to do with how comfortable I am with my body (not very, but then, I also don't give a rat's ass about what strangers think). I do it because I'm very pale and burn easily, and painfully. Sunscreen doesn't always work very well when I'm in the water. The t-shirt protects my sensitive neck and shoulders. Maybe the women were doing the same thing?  Either way, I probably wouldn't have immediately assumed that they weren't comfortable with themselves just as they are.


----------



## BarbBBW

They were wearing like pull up sundresses, with no shoulder coverage. Like a halter style dress. Thats not for sun coverage protection. As far as them hiding themselves, thats was my opinion. I dont know if indeed thats what they were doing, but thats the way I took it as. The dresses were long and dark brown the other was black. Usually for sun protection, its a white tee or cover up of somekind. Either way, I can not speak for them, It was just my observation, and thats what I relayed here.


----------



## KuroBara

That I'm in South Korea instead of at home. It's not that I don't like it here, but a lot has happened since I've been gone, and now the family life I found so boring seems so interesting since I'm halfway across the world. And I miss sweet, tasty corn and public bathrooms with toilet paper and soap.


----------



## cinnamitch

TraciJo67 said:


> I wear a long t-shirt over my swimsuit when I am in the pool. It has nothing to do with how comfortable I am with my body (not very, but then, I also don't give a rat's ass about what strangers think). I do it because I'm very pale and burn easily, and painfully. Sunscreen doesn't always work very well when I'm in the water. The t-shirt protects my sensitive neck and shoulders. Maybe the women were doing the same thing?  Either way, I probably wouldn't have immediately assumed that they weren't comfortable with themselves just as they are.


ll 


I wear a shirt and still burn. Im way too pale it seems.


----------



## PunkPeach

I feel insanely lonely and in need of a hug. Which is unlike me, I am not generally lonely when I have my friends around, and I am not big on wanting to be held/hugged. Right now, I just really feel like I need it.


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

PunkPeach said:


> I feel insanely lonely and in need of a hug. Which is unlike me, I am not generally lonely when I have my friends around, and I am not big on wanting to be held/hugged. Right now, I just really feel like I need it.


I get that feeling to sometimes. (((Punk)))


----------



## Tanuki

PunkPeach said:


> I feel insanely lonely and in need of a hug. Which is unlike me, I am not generally lonely when I have my friends around, and I am not big on wanting to be held/hugged. Right now, I just really feel like I need it.



*hugs* I sometimes feel this way too, I hope its gets better soon :3


----------



## Sugar

Miscommunication....


----------



## steely

Tummy troubles


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

That I am not finding work!!!


----------



## HottiMegan

I am in enormous amount of pain. I got a sunburn on Saturday. I am now starting to blister on my forehead and right shoulder a little. Teeny tiny blisters on my shoulder and a big 4 inch by 1/2 inch blister along the top of my forehead.. youch!!


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

Dang Megan that is not good. I hope they get better soon.


----------



## HDANGEL15

*I am watching the news, and just saw a grown man crying becuase his cat dissappeared and showed up in a pit, in the city along with another dead cat, and had been killed by kids with cement blocks...i am sitting here with my kitty purring...and am so grateful I don't let my furry beast outside...

this is just a horror to me that kids can be so cruel 

how do kids get so twisted that they could possibly find entertainment in something so sick *


----------



## Rowan

My weekend with mike went by way too fast


----------



## steely

HDANGEL15 said:


> *I am watching the news, and just saw a grown man crying becuase his cat dissappeared and showed up in a pit, in the city along with another dead cat, and had been killed by kids with cement blocks...i am sitting here with my kitty purring...and am so grateful I don't let my furry beast outside...
> 
> this is just a horror to me that kids can be so cruel
> 
> how do kids get so twisted that they could possibly find entertainment in something so sick *



This breaks my heart. Who doesn't teach their children empathy and compassion. It sickens me.


----------



## goofy girl

People................................


----------



## Fonzy

Drunk people thinking they are right, drunk people thinking they are better than me, drunk people, people in general, the outside world, the economic recession, not being near my muffin, not being able to hold my muffin, not being able to kiss my muffin, lots of things really  Oh and lack of sleep................ and not being able to eat a "tag along" :blink:


----------



## Buttah

i think i'm sad mostly because i'm PMSing and my emotions are heightened right now

anyways, i'm sad and mad cuz i'm lonely and i still never had a boyfriend before and i'm starting to question things. starting to think that cali isn't the place for me to find love nor to support my future. i feel stuck. many jumbled things in my mind right now, but that's the primary


----------



## dynomite_gurl

Fonzy said:


> Drunk people thinking they are right, drunk people thinking they are better than me, drunk people, people in general, the outside world, the economic recession, not being near my muffin, not being able to hold my muffin, not being able to kiss my muffin, lots of things really  Oh and lack of sleep................ and not being able to eat a "tag along" :blink:



 try not to mind those people. awww :kiss2: all those things make me  too, but hopefully not that much longer babe. lol and of course you miss the tag alongs! don't forget the tacos


----------



## Noir

Scientists who do pointless studies while wasting money AND getting paid. "MSG can make you fat" WOW scientist! way to catch up with the rest of the world. I should just slap a PHD on my wall and call myself smart.


----------



## dynomite_gurl

I don't have a lot of things to be sad about right now but....the very hot weather in Washington, having a lonely bed , not being around my babe. not being able to find a j.o.b, and having a painful jaw for some reason!


----------



## OneWickedAngel

I am at the bus station waiting to head back to NYC. My weekend in Boston is officially over. Waaaaaaah!


----------



## DeniseW

Someone who I thought for a long long time was polite, sweet , caring and a real man, turned out to be just the opposite. You just never know!!


----------



## Chef

People waiting at bus stops for a bus that only runs on weekdays...


----------



## GTAFA

I have a friend with a daughter/grand-daughter, whose lives were always were described as perfect perfect perfect, and who has sometimes looked down on me and my own daughter, when not offering advice and bailing us out. I welcome her help but wish i didnt' need it. We've managed to be friends even as my daughter wrote a virtual cautionary tale on how not to get married, get pregnant, get divorce with restraining order, etc etc. NOW, this weekend it all blew up, with the perfect daughter behaving like the demon seed, throwing her mom out for simply disagreeing. My friend is starting to sympathize a bit more with my own plight.

While there might be a tiny bit of relief in seeing how the mighty are fallen, it's still very sad for my friend who is mostly heart broken. I'm trying to console her. I had really thought her daughter wasn't going to sink so low. Someday they will all be happy happy, but right now there are a bunch of long faces.


----------



## Sugar

I'm just not feeling anything anymore. Major case of the meh's.


----------



## Gingembre

I would really like a hug today...a real, warm 'i care about you' hug. No-one here to give said hug


----------



## PhatChk

Where to start. It has been a tough year. January lost my job after working there for 4 years. The lost of income was a huge dent in my household. Unemployment pays is okay but not enough. I go back to college. I am working hard and doing well. I am started to pay my sisters car because my mother has not been a firm mom lately. Cant blame her either she is tire of taking care of my grandfather ( he has diabetes, amputated leg and lung fibrosis with Alzheimer's) and the monetary situation. Taking care of my grandfather took great effort. I took care of my grandfather during the day then my mother. We were both very tire. My Grandmother dies in February. Everyone leaves for the funeral and lives me behind with my incapacitated grandfather. The loneliness starts to worry me. By June I had to go to the hospital my visit lasted 2 weeks. I had pulmonary embolism and pneumonia. That was a shock but after all the bruising and needles I was okay. Came out smiling 

A few days later a friend confided in me that my cousins boyfriend had been txting her and msg in yahoo. He had been telling her things about the relationship between my cousin and him. The family already did not like him we all could see he was mentally abusing my cousin. My cousin saw it but hold in on for a reason I do not think she even knew. My friend told me how he wanted to get to "know" my friend better and maybe go out. He had told my friend in more simple words how he wanted the Hispanic girlfriend without having to deal with the Hispanic family and culture. And my cousin is the most Dominican girl in the world I have met. He even talked to my friend about their sex life. But we kept this part from my cousin, we though it was just to much and she would be really hurt by it. My friend kept turning him down and telling him that she considered my cousin family. But he wouldn't give up. I kept my mouth shut for a couple of weeks. But I really started to feel really guilty when I her my cousin talking about her plans for anniversary. I finally broke down and told my cousins sister. And she broke told her sister. My cousin was really hurt and devastated. The next day my friend, my sister and myself went to help her move. I was not fully recovered but I had to go my sister is firecracker and I am the only one that can keep her in check. And still it was very hard to keep her from assaulting him; he was very scary when we went to help her move out. She was my cousin and there was nothing we wouldn't do for her. 

Unfortunately, other things came out that night. It seem that my friend was not at innocent as we thought. He said how they had met in two occasions while my cousin was in Dominican Republic. And they had talk about an attraction between them. This hurt my cousin now she just didnt have a cheating boyfriend but betrayed by a good friend. As the days went by a lot of thing started to fit together. I had heard some stories my friend had told me about how some of her later friend had stopped talking to her because their of her "friendship" with their boyfriends. I though "wow bunch of insecure girls." And having a conversation with my cousin and sister we started to understand who my friend really was. She is smart, funny, intelligent and a basic good person. But when it comes to men she is really frustrated. She is in her 20's she tends to scare men because of her intensity. And I think that by getting the attention of men already married or in a relationship makes her feel good. Not really caring who she hurts because it is not her fault. This realization hurt me a lot. I know she is not perfect and when you love someone you love them with all their faults. I want to keep being her friend because otherwise she is very cool and great it is just her morals that are screwed. I have been battling with this for weeks. I want her a friend but I cannot trust her with the person that might become my boyfriend. Even, if I trust him. I do not trust her.
By this time my cousin is thinking of going back to her mentally abusive boyfriend. By this time I am getting tire of the whole situation and had a serious discussing with my cousin. Told her that my sister risked her freedom and life to help her out, she knew if my sister had to physically defend her my sister might have been in trouble, I risked my health traveling in the middle of the night in a cold day after being in the hospital just a few days before to help her out and defend her against this troll. All her own sister had done to take her in her home and take care of her. Told he to remember all the things she had told us he had done to her. And how she had lost her self and her freedom. That if she is still wanted to go back I wasn't going to stop her but to forget about the rest of the family including me. I told her I could not do anymore for her and that I could not be hypocrite and pretend nothing was wrong. This really hurt me. My family is very important. And I really try to build emotional bonds with them but there's so much you can do, and I was done. The days after this were very troublesome, the ex kept coming around and this situation was straining the relationship between her sister and her husband. And some how I had become the mediator between the two sisters. Mind you all this happen in between 5 to 7 days after getting out of the hospital. I still couldn't breath right and the medication made me shake whenever my body temp. would rise. 
I started my new semester and started to study until late and sleeping only a few hours a day. Ten days later my I went to sleep at 2:30 am and I was woken at 3 am by my mother to call the EMT'S. My grandfather had died while everyone slept and I was doing my homework. It was hard but expected. Our next concern was funeral money he didn’t have life insurance. And when we had tried to get him some he was to old. He died at the age of 89 year old. After a couple of miracles we found the money. This was week a go Thursday. My parents left that Friday to Puerto Rico with my grandfather's body for the funeral. I was left again behind to take care of things. I had to turn in his hospital bed, clean his room, give way his clothe, call doctors and did all things that needed to be done. My sister had to leave to Mexico to be with her husband and I am here in a very lonely house having to deal with everything by myself. Not only that yesterday our roommate got robbed at gunpoint and stole his keys and papers with our address on it. Yayy! lol I do not have enough money to get a new house lock until Friday so, let just say I have only slept 4 hours today. Lol

I really do not want this to sound like some tragic novel. But these are the things that are troubling me right now. I am really trying to stay happy. I had had some good times too but not good enough to erase some of the bad ones. I smile everyday and I pretend everything is okay and can be fixed. Actually I know some of these things are fixable and I am positive about everything. I have been feeling tired physically and mentally. I do not like being depress and I ma sure no one does. lol I try to keep my self busy by doing class work, talking to friends, going out and really trying to keep my spirits up but when ever I stop everything keeps coming back. I haven’t told one person everything (until now lol). I feel like if I did I would sound like a walking tragic story. I am a sad but I am really trying to make things better. I do not want to feel like this anymore. I am just having a really hard year. I know it will pass. I just gotta keep holding on. I do feel I need a long vacation lol Thank you to anyone who read this. I am sry to bother you with my troubles. But it feels okay to finally let all of this out. These are the things that are making me a little sad.


----------



## SSQT

How has life gone by so fast and I haven't accomplished hardly anything in life that I wanted to? 

Why do people have to hurt each other so much?

Why do bad things happen to good people?

How come the one you want wants someone else?

Why is there so much pain? What is there to hope for anymore? 

Why do people push you away when all you want to do is hold them in your arms and love them forever? Why?


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

I am feeling like such a burden to everyone around me! I can't find a job..
I am just down...

I know how everyone feels life does suck!


----------



## BeautifulPoeticDisaster

my hubby isn't here I miss him!!!


----------



## NoraBadora

I'm really missing having someone to sleep next to.


----------



## mossystate

The Hate Crimes that happened at a health club in PA. Three women were murdered ( the gunman was specifically going after women, whom he thought ruined his life and made his life miserable ).


----------



## Surlysomething

I'm putting down my girl cat tomorrow. She's very sick....it's time...


----------



## mergirl

Surlysomething said:


> I'm putting down my girl cat tomorrow. She's very sick....it's time...



I'm so sorry.  You are a caring owner and are putting the needs of your cat first. If ever i got too sick i would hope that someone would do the same for me. xx


----------



## Donna

Betamax said:


> A friend's dog just died very suddenly. That (adorable, sweet, energetic, smiling) dog slept with my friend's 10 yr old son every night for years.
> 
> He now clutches her collar in his sleep.
> 
> She said he is absolutely devastated. RIP Pepper



Children and dogs, the bond is so amazing...and sometimes so heartbreaking. I am sad for you and your friend's son.



Surlysomething said:


> I'm putting down my girl cat tomorrow. She's very sick....it's time...



Putting a pet down is one of the hardest things you will ever have to do. I'm sorry you are going through this. Peace to you.


----------



## BarbBBW

i went for a check up at the Dr this morning. He said my sugars were too high and i need to DIET ASAP. I am starting to lose weight already, and I am planning on going down to 250. But then I wanna gain after that again. Can I do this safely, not to get full blown Diabetes?? we shall see!!


----------



## OneWickedAngel

Just found out a friend has died. I just spoke to her a few short days ago. I'm in a little shock.


----------



## BarbBBW

OneWickedAngel said:


> Just found out a friend has died. I just spoke to her a few short days ago. I'm in a little shock.



I am so sorry


----------



## luscious_lulu

OneWickedAngel said:


> Just found out a friend has died. I just spoke to her a few short days ago. I'm in a little shock.



*hugs*
...................


----------



## Rowan

I thought there might be a chance that mike could come up this weekend, but it looks like he cant


----------



## Sugar

Surlysomething said:


> I'm putting down my girl cat tomorrow. She's very sick....it's time...



I am so sorry. I hope you're OK.


----------



## Sugar

I'm sad that my sister is never going to be able to take care of herself. I found out tonight that she had literally no food in her house and had been eating left overs from her husband's job at Arby's since Thursday. She's 2 hours away and I'm upset that she's moved so far away and into a icky situation.


----------



## DeniseW

I'm sad that the concert is over, I waited for months and it's over just like that but it was one of the best nights of my life!!! I'm hoarse from screaming and sore from dancing but it was all worth it...


----------



## mergirl

There was a woman's body found in the harbour outside mine n Gd's house. Really sad. I would have found the body were it not for the fact that my dog had me out at 4am because she ate something bad and was ill, so was sleeping when i normally take her out (about 20 mins before the body was found). I think i would have freaked out if i had found it so perhaps fate got in the way. It was sad though. GD aunt said "I hope its no one we know" and i thought "Well its someone somebody knows" Sad


----------



## Surlysomething

Thanks for all the kind words regarding my cat.

She was SUCH a good girl that day. It was peaceful and sweet and i'm so glad I was there when she left this world.


:wubu:


----------



## Rowan

My mom is having a lot of problems right now and I am there for her but dont know exactly how to help. I dont want to lose her to any selfish choices she might make for herself


----------



## thejuicyone

Love sick  (Ready for my man to get back from visiting his family)


----------



## steely

Just sick, been up since 1 am, yuck!


----------



## Donna

Cruelty..in all of its forms. :really sad:


----------



## HottiMegan

Max had his first taste of bullying today. He's 5 days into first grade and got ganged up by 4 kids who proceeded to pants him (underwear too) in order to "torture" him. He was very sad about it and i feel helpless about it. Max is what one would consider a little person. He isn't a dwarf but is basically very much like one. So that opens him up to being smaller and different to the other kids. I half wonder if he has been picked on this year more than he's telling me because both days this week he was trying to find excuses to stay home from school. I have contacted his teacher via email since Max comes home on the bus so late. If i don't hear from her hubby and i will go to the school to see what protection is in place for him. My poor sweet, sensitive little guy. My heart is broken for him.


----------



## Mathias

HottiMegan said:


> Max had his first taste of bullying today. He's 5 days into first grade and got ganged up by 4 kids who proceeded to pants him (underwear too) in order to "torture" him. He was very sad about it and i feel helpless about it. Max is what one would consider a little person. He isn't a dwarf but is basically very much like one. So that opens him up to being smaller and different to the other kids. I half wonder if he has been picked on this year more than he's telling me because both days this week he was trying to find excuses to stay home from school. I have contacted his teacher via email since Max comes home on the bus so late. If i don't hear from her hubby and i will go to the school to see what protection is in place for him. My poor sweet, sensitive little guy. My heart is broken for him.



:really sad: That's awful! I hope things will get better for him.


----------



## mossystate

Megan, my heart breaks for him. I sure hope this is a mere blip on his childhood map, and things get better.  Poor little guy.


----------



## fatgirlflyin

HottiMegan said:


> Max had his first taste of bullying today. He's 5 days into first grade and got ganged up by 4 kids who proceeded to pants him (underwear too) in order to "torture" him. He was very sad about it and i feel helpless about it. Max is what one would consider a little person. He isn't a dwarf but is basically very much like one. So that opens him up to being smaller and different to the other kids. I half wonder if he has been picked on this year more than he's telling me because both days this week he was trying to find excuses to stay home from school. I have contacted his teacher via email since Max comes home on the bus so late. If i don't hear from her hubby and i will go to the school to see what protection is in place for him. My poor sweet, sensitive little guy. My heart is broken for him.



Schools are REALLY cracking down on bullying these days. I'm sorry to hear about what happened to your son. Please persue this and make sure that the children who did this do get punished for their actions. (I'm sure you will, just saying)


----------



## msbard90

i'm sad because I just want something comforting in my life right now, and i don't have it.


----------



## knottedsouls

I hadnt had access to the boards since june 15th because I had the website address memorized wrong . 

I was convinced it had something to do with the cookies saved on my hard drive...and have repeatedly deleted cookies, defraged my computer etc.to try to be able to get back on the boards...

but alas it is simply that I forgot to put ~magazine~ after ~dimension~ in the web address...

I feel like a smacked ass...:blush:
( but at least its figured out now )


----------



## sugar and spice

HottiMegan said:


> Max had his first taste of bullying today. He's 5 days into first grade and got ganged up by 4 kids who proceeded to pants him (underwear too) in order to "torture" him. He was very sad about it and i feel helpless about it. Max is what one would consider a little person. He isn't a dwarf but is basically very much like one. So that opens him up to being smaller and different to the other kids. I half wonder if he has been picked on this year more than he's telling me because both days this week he was trying to find excuses to stay home from school. I have contacted his teacher via email since Max comes home on the bus so late. If i don't hear from her hubby and i will go to the school to see what protection is in place for him. My poor sweet, sensitive little guy. My heart is broken for him.



Oh Megan that is terrible poor Max, where the hell were the teachers or staff when this was happening? I'm glad you're going to keep persuing it because those kids need to be punished for that and Max shouldn't have to deal with that anymore. I hope everything gets straightened out quickly and that Max can move on and enjoy school again.(((((Max))))


----------



## Surlysomething

HottiMegan said:


> Max had his first taste of bullying today. He's 5 days into first grade and got ganged up by 4 kids who proceeded to pants him (underwear too) in order to "torture" him. He was very sad about it and i feel helpless about it. Max is what one would consider a little person. He isn't a dwarf but is basically very much like one. So that opens him up to being smaller and different to the other kids. I half wonder if he has been picked on this year more than he's telling me because both days this week he was trying to find excuses to stay home from school. I have contacted his teacher via email since Max comes home on the bus so late. If i don't hear from her hubby and i will go to the school to see what protection is in place for him. My poor sweet, sensitive little guy. My heart is broken for him.




Poor little dude. Kids can be vultures.


----------



## HottiMegan

thanks everyone with your responses. I'd hand out rep but i ran out! 
Max's teacher contacted the principal this morning and she took care of it. She reprimanded the children and called the parents about it. Apparently they were playing on the fact that Max doesn't like the dentist (due to getting a filling last week) and they decided to torture him and hold him down or something and play dentist and his pants got pulled down in the struggle. So they got in trouble and a lesson was taught about respecting fellow students. So hopefully it'll make Max feel better. We took him out for ice cream last night to help. He tried to stay home again today from school so i don't know how good he feels about it all.


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

Just found out they are giving my uncle 3 days to a week to live..please pray for him and his family.. He had been in remission for a couple years and his cancer came back...So sad....


----------



## Rowan

im sure its probably just my own insecurities, but i feel like im screwing everything up and dont know how to fix things...my relationship, work...life in general


----------



## Surlysomething

EllorionsDarlingAngel said:


> Just found out they are giving my uncle 3 days to a week to live..please pray for him and his family.. He had been in remission for a couple years and his cancer came back...So sad....





I'm so sorry to hear about your Uncle. Life can be pretty cruel sometimes.


Sending my best thoughts..


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

Surlysomething said:


> I'm so sorry to hear about your Uncle. Life can be pretty cruel sometimes.
> 
> 
> Sending my best thoughts..


Yes it can be..I just hope I can get up there and see him before he passes..This is just so hard...


----------



## BarbBBW

EllorionsDarlingAngel said:


> Just found out they are giving my uncle 3 days to a week to live..please pray for him and his family.. He had been in remission for a couple years and his cancer came back...So sad....



I am so sorry babe!! I will say prayers for all of you


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

BarbBBW said:


> I am so sorry babe!! I will say prayers for all of you


Thank You..I am have a hard time with this..since just not but back in April we lost my Oma to the same cancer that is taking my Uncle. We had had hope for my Oma when we first found out because my Uncle had went into remission. So we hoped that would be the same for her but she died not, but a month or so after us find out she had cancer. I feel sorry for my Aunt and cousins. I am trying to figure out a away I can get up there to see them all. Thank you again we need all the prayers we can get to get through this hard time. Love Ya! Life truely is to short!


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

I went last night and saw my uncle at the hospital. That was so hard. He is worse then I thought. My Aunt told me the cancer is all over now. He is in and out of it. He has been since before he went into the hospital been seeing people and things that are not there. My Aunt and cousins are being so strong.


----------



## Surlysomething

EllorionsDarlingAngel said:


> I went last night and saw my uncle at the hospital. That was so hard. He is worse then I thought. My Aunt told me the cancer is all over now. He is in and out of it. He has been since before he went into the hospital been seeing people and things that are not there. My Aunt and cousins are being so strong.




I'm so glad you got to see him. It was important for your family to have you there as well. -big hug-


----------



## Rowan

Im very frustrated and sad with too many aspects of my life right now. Some mornings i just dont want to wake up


----------



## snuggletiger

EllorionsDarlingAngel said:


> I went last night and saw my uncle at the hospital. That was so hard. He is worse then I thought. My Aunt told me the cancer is all over now. He is in and out of it. He has been since before he went into the hospital been seeing people and things that are not there. My Aunt and cousins are being so strong.



Big giant hugs. Wish I could cheer you all up.


----------



## smithnwesson

Rowan said:


> Im very frustrated and sad with too many aspects of my life right now. Some mornings i just dont want to wake up


Great big hugs to you, Rowan. PM me if you like. . .

I very rarely get involved in political issues and *ALWAYS* regret it. . .


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

Surlysomething said:


> I'm so glad you got to see him. It was important for your family to have you there as well. -big hug-


Thank You. they all including my Grams told me that last night.. It was hard seeing him like that, but I am so glad I got the chance to go.



Rowan said:


> Im very frustrated and sad with too many aspects of my life right now. Some mornings i just dont want to wake up


I am so sorry to hear that sweetheart! I know how you feel I truely do. Big Hugs!



snuggletiger said:


> Big giant hugs. Wish I could cheer you all up.


Thank You ST. Not much can cheer me up right now..


----------



## steely

My brother accidentally cut down my morning glory's with the weedeater.


----------



## Oldtimer76

EllorionsDarlingAngel said:


> Just found out they are giving my uncle 3 days to a week to live..please pray for him and his family.. He had been in remission for a couple years and his cancer came back...So sad....



((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Chimpi/Ellorion)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))


----------



## Oldtimer76

I think it is sad Monique is closing down her paysite after all those years. No more chocolate kisses :-(
She deserves a statue:bow:


----------



## mossystate

steely said:


> My brother accidentally cut down my morning glory's with the weedeater.



You watch that thing come back ...with a vengence...and gunning for your brother!


----------



## steely

mossystate said:


> You watch that thing come back ...with a vengence...and gunning for your brother!



I hope so!


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

steely said:


> My brother accidentally cut down my morning glory's with the weedeater.


Man that stinks..Sorry to hear that hon.



Oldtimer76 said:


> ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Chimpi/Ellorion)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))


Thank You OT...Do I need to be making a call to Chimpi or something?


----------



## Oldtimer76

EllorionsDarlingAngel said:


> Man that stinks..Sorry to hear that hon.
> 
> Thank You OT...Do I need to be making a call to Chimpi or something?



I thought you used that name before..., so that's why
Or am I wrong?


----------



## Oldtimer76

EllorionsDarlingAngel said:


> Man that stinks..Sorry to hear that hon.
> 
> Thank You OT...Do I need to be making a call to Chimpi or something?



I thought you used that name before..., so that's why Didn't know how to call you. Maybe I'm living in the past


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

Oldtimer76 said:


> I thought you used that name before..., so that's why
> Or am I wrong?


 


Oldtimer76 said:


> I thought you used that name before..., so that's why Didn't know how to call you. Maybe I'm living in the past


 
No I did back when Chimpi and I were together, my name use to be ChimpisDarlingAngel.. Your right.  It's ok to live in the past every once in a while..


----------



## steely

EllorionsDarlingAngel said:


> Man that stinks..Sorry to hear that hon.



Thanks EDA, I woke up this morning and there was no glory.


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

steely said:


> Thanks EDA, I woke up this morning and there was no glory.


Aww..that stinks silly brothers! I know how they can be!


----------



## Oldtimer76

EllorionsDarlingAngel said:


> No I did back when Chimpi and I were together, my name use to be ChimpisDarlingAngel.. Your right.  It's ok to live in the past every once in a while..



Any news about your uncle, sweetheart?

*_Hugs_*


----------



## luscious_lulu

Rowan said:


> My mom is having a lot of problems right now and I am there for her but dont know exactly how to help. I dont want to lose her to any selfish choices she might make for herself



*hugs* Sometimes you need to let people make mistakes and screw up. It's hard to watch, but by not letting her make the mistakes you are enabling her.


----------



## luscious_lulu

It's my dad's birthday today. I think it's the last one he'll be able to celebrate. His cancer is taking it's toll.


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

Oldtimer76 said:


> Any news about your uncle, sweetheart?
> 
> *_Hugs_*


He is now at a Hope Hospice resting..I was talking to one of my cousins and that's all I she told me. So I am happy that he is resting and he is comfortable. 



luscious_lulu said:


> It's my dad's birthday today. I think it's the last one he'll be able to celebrate. His cancer is taking it's toll.


 I am sorry sweetie! ((Hugs))


----------



## Surlysomething

I lost my freaking cell phone today.

My nephew was a little asshole when we were out shopping today.

My hair looks like crap.

My place is a mess.

I was supposted to relax this weekend and I did NOT.


I'm beyond bitchy. Like 8 gazillion thousand light years past it.


----------



## 1300 Class

Rejected for another job. Getting to the point now where the will to try is just being sapped away.


----------



## Surlysomething

Surlysomething said:


> I lost my freaking cell phone today.
> 
> My nephew was a little asshole when we were out shopping today.
> 
> My hair looks like crap.
> 
> My place is a mess.
> 
> I was supposted to relax this weekend and I did NOT.
> 
> 
> I'm beyond bitchy. Like 8 gazillion thousand light years past it.



Found my phone!


----------



## HDANGEL15

I can't sleep, from discomfort/pain + it's been almost 2 weeks since I had hip surgery--I just want ONE good nites sleep ; (

I have to wait TWO weeks for the Finale of True Blood

There's only ONE show left for the season of True Blood


----------



## HottiMegan

Max keeps trying to not go to school. I'm afraid that the bullying is making him not want to be in school. The school nurse said he's in there daily with various complaints. He's totally fine at home but sooo sick at school. I am not sure what to do for my little guy.


----------



## Surlysomething

HottiMegan said:


> Max keeps trying to not go to school. I'm afraid that the bullying is making him not want to be in school. The school nurse said he's in there daily with various complaints. He's totally fine at home but sooo sick at school. I am not sure what to do for my little guy.




Does his teacher suggest anything?


----------



## CleverBomb

Surlysomething said:


> Found my phone!


Yay! Dropped mine two weeks ago and ruined the screen, got a replacement that's quite good but not quite the same. (Was: Nokia E71, Now: Nokia E75). 

Sad? My scooter (the big one) is in the shop and should have been done today, but one of their mechanics quit and it might be as late as Thursday by the time they're done. 
And my other scooter (the little one) is waiting for me in Las Vegas for when I head down there in a week on business. I miss my bikes. 

-Rusty
Suzuki Burgman 650
Vespa 150S


----------



## archivaltype

Surlysomething said:


> The movie Seven Pounds.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> i've been pretty down for awhile and seeing this didn't help...but it affected me, just like it was meant to



Holy crap, me too. I watched it and cried for like...an hour after it was over. Incredible incredible incredible movie. 

Heh...I'm bummered out because I'm so damn easy to string along. :doh:


----------



## thejuicyone

I decided to torture myself and read random love letters via the internet, while listening to love songs. It was just one of those nights. 

I'm such a hopeless romantic...


----------



## 1300 Class

Another employment rejection. Damn the system to hell!


----------



## Surlysomething

Australian Lord said:


> Another employment rejection. Damn the system to hell!




Keep on with it. Your persistence will pay off.


----------



## HottiMegan

Much of my life i feel like i'm on the outside looking in. Not feeling a part of anything or anyone. I'm the kid who wasn't invited to the party sitting across the street watching everyone have fun. I don't belong anywhere.


----------



## Surlysomething

HottiMegan said:


> Much of my life i feel like i'm on the outside looking in. Not feeling a part of anything or anyone. I'm the kid who wasn't invited to the party sitting across the street watching everyone have fun. I don't belong anywhere.




Awww. I'm so sorry you're feeling this way.  It's hard being a stay at home Mom, i'm sure. Try and keep your chin up, girlie. What about taking a class at night when your husband gets home so you can have some 'me' time? Even if it's a cooking class or something like that.


----------



## HottiMegan

I do miss me time. I haven't had any in a few years. I usually go to bed early so i can have some me time by reading a book or playing on my DS in bed. I am probably going to start back to school in the spring going 3/4 time in the evenings or early classes before Max gets off of school. If school doesn't work out, i'm going to look into some full time employment. I just miss adult interaction. I don't have a car during the day so i have little choices as to what to do with my time.
I was tempted to take a community class teaching indian cooking but was nervous about that being a vegetarian.


----------



## mergirl

that i think this time its really over.


----------



## mossystate

I don't like a sad mer.


----------



## mergirl

mossystate said:


> I don't like a sad mer.


noof. i don't either. och well.. this is the "whats making you sad thread".. Its the best place for it i guess..


----------



## 1300 Class

Only one more week of employment left on the current job... so wish the job was contracted to last longer than next week. 

Still, the life of a Passenger Load Counter was a decent, honest calling...


----------



## Sugar

My week of fun is quickly coming to a close.


----------



## Weeze

I miss "real" college


----------



## Gingembre

HottiMegan said:


> I was tempted to take a community class teaching indian cooking but was nervous about that being a vegetarian.



I would have thought Indian cooking would be very suited to vegetarianism? When I was in India I ate totally meat-free, and a high percentage of Indian people are vegetarians. If this is something you're interested in, Megan, perhaps talk to the person running the class about it? I'm sure the majority of recipes must be geared up to vegetarians and have ingredients you can substitute in place of meat - paneer, stuff like that. Worth enquiring?


----------



## Teleute

one of my coworkers has just passed away. she's been struggling with lung cancer for about a year and we've been spending a lot of time visiting and supporting her because she didn't have any family. they'd stopped treatment after it metastasized to her brain and bones, so we knew it was coming, but it was still kind of a shock to hear. it just hurts


----------



## QueenB

my best friend's dad died last night.


----------



## Donna

Teleute said:


> one of my coworkers has just passed away. she's been struggling with lung cancer for about a year and we've been spending a lot of time visiting and supporting her because she didn't have any family. they'd stopped treatment after it metastasized to her brain and bones, so we knew it was coming, but it was still kind of a shock to hear. it just hurts





QueenB said:


> my best friend's dad died last night.



Wishing you both peace and strength.


----------



## Mathias

My sore throat...


----------



## ssflbelle

Teleute and Queen Bee
I came on line to say I was sad I was all alone and not able to share the day with anyone. But after reading your posts I realized there are worse things in life. So sorry to hear about the deaths of your coworker and best friends dad. My prayers go out to you both and your fellow coworkers, family and friends who are grieving today.


----------



## Teleute

<3<3<3

Thank you so much, Donna and Belle. I really appreciate your support. *hugs*


----------



## Leesa

My vacation ends today; back to reality.


----------



## Surlysomething

Teleute said:


> one of my coworkers has just passed away. she's been struggling with lung cancer for about a year and we've been spending a lot of time visiting and supporting her because she didn't have any family. they'd stopped treatment after it metastasized to her brain and bones, so we knew it was coming, but it was still kind of a shock to hear. it just hurts




So sorry to hear this, Teleute 

Queen B, i'm also sad to hear your news. Life truly sucks some days.


----------



## QueenB

thank you so much, everyone. i also reaaaally appreciate your support.

death has always been so hard for me to deal with, but i am going to do my best to be strong for my friend and her family.


----------



## fatgirlflyin

Jon Blaze said:


> I'm having the worst failed relationship in my life. It was over before it began, and I'm still being hurt.



Sorry that your relationship didn't work out, that always sucks. I hope you don't hurt for long! 

I try to look at a relationship that ends, not as a failure, but as a learning experience. You learn from the relationship that just ended and hopefully your next relationship will benefit from the pain you are feeing now.


----------



## Sugar

Mike went home today.


----------



## dynomite_gurl

A really bad headache after spending 3 hours in a boring and somewhat useless class


----------



## mossystate

Lucky said:


> Mike went home today.



Aw...little stinky...sorry.


----------



## Sugar

mossystate said:


> Aw...little stinky...sorry.



Awww thanks. *slides lotion tissues and soup towards plumpy*


----------



## BarbBBW

*Well today was the worst day of my life. My mother, passed away this morning. As many of you know , she had a massive stroke back in October, and it made her life very hard. So , I am happy, she is at rest, but it doesnt make the heartache any less.*


----------



## Mathias

BarbBBW said:


> *Well today was the worst day of my life. My mother, passed away this morning. As many of you know , she had a massive stroke back in October, and it made her life very hard. So , I am happy, she is at rest, but it doesnt make the heartache any less.*



I'm so sorry Barb.  My condolences.


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

BarbBBW said:


> *Well today was the worst day of my life. My mother, passed away this morning. As many of you know , she had a massive stroke back in October, and it made her life very hard. So , I am happy, she is at rest, but it doesnt make the heartache any less.*


OMG I am so sorry Barb! Yes she is in a better place now. ((((Barb))))


----------



## BarbBBW

Mathias said:


> I'm so sorry Barb.  My condolences.





EllorionsDarlingAngel said:


> OMG I am so sorry Barb! Yes she is in a better place now. ((((Barb))))



thank you both very much!! i appreciate it


----------



## mossystate

Sorry to hear about your mom, Barb.


----------



## Surlysomething

BarbBBW said:


> *Well today was the worst day of my life. My mother, passed away this morning. As many of you know , she had a massive stroke back in October, and it made her life very hard. So , I am happy, she is at rest, but it doesnt make the heartache any less.*




I'm so sorry for your loss, Barb.

My thoughts are with you and your family.


----------



## fatgirlflyin

BarbBBW said:


> *Well today was the worst day of my life. My mother, passed away this morning. As many of you know , she had a massive stroke back in October, and it made her life very hard. So , I am happy, she is at rest, but it doesnt make the heartache any less.*



So sorry to hear of your mother's passing.


----------



## Donna

My prayers are with you and your family as you grieve. I'm sorry.


----------



## BarbBBW

fatgirlflyin said:


> So sorry to hear of your mother's passing.





Surlysomething said:


> I'm so sorry for your loss, Barb.
> 
> My thoughts are with you and your family.





mossystate said:


> Sorry to hear about your mom, Barb.



thank you all very much.


----------



## tonynyc

BarbBBW said:


> *Well today was the worst day of my life. My mother, passed away this morning. As many of you know , she had a massive stroke back in October, and it made her life very hard. So , I am happy, she is at rest, but it doesnt make the heartache any less.*



_(((( Barb)))) so sorry for your loss. My condolences & prayers for your Mom, you & family at this very difficult time..._


----------



## Adrian

I am so sorry to hear about your mother you have my condolences. You and all of your family have my prayers.

Adrian


----------



## chocolate desire

Barb I am very sorry to hear about your mom.


----------



## luscious_lulu

Barb, I'm sorry to hear about your mom. *big hugs*


----------



## knottedsouls

After waiting over 6 weeks, I finally got a response from my ex partner on September first in regards to our now four year son... she's not sure she can trust me or that I will follow through in reguards to visitation and contact with our son. 

She broke off our relationship in early November '08( mostly due to the fact that I would not quit my job that she hated that I have had before we started going out several years ago) and promised that she would never keep my son away from me.

I had supported her both previous to our relationship and all throughout(housing, food, clothing, overall financially) due to illness ( she had several bouts of leukemia) for 7 years and then once she was well she got pregnant via a generous donation form a close friend, I supported her and him the last nearly five because she didnt want to put our son into childcare due to her own fears and insecurities and refused to find a job.

.... Im not sure how much more proof of my ability to 'follow through' she needs.

I last saw my son on April 27th of this year, and now unless my ex changes her mind, Ill not see him again until he is old enough to make his own decisions...as I was not able to legally adopt him while she and I were together due to financial constraints and the legal recourse left to me will cause more harm then good in the end for my son.( who is the one who is most important in this scenerio) 

I've been trying to get on with living my life...some days its really hard and I get so sad I can barely stand it. Like today, I just miss him horribly.
I went from seeing my little boy everyday, watching spongebob ( I know bad show but my goodness it made him laugh) and seasame street every morning with him before work and putting him to bed everynight, going to sleep watching him sleep in his crib/bed to not seeing him for close to five months...and now, I may not see him for years or ever...


----------



## TraciJo67

BarbBBW said:


> *Well today was the worst day of my life. My mother, passed away this morning. As many of you know , she had a massive stroke back in October, and it made her life very hard. So , I am happy, she is at rest, but it doesnt make the heartache any less.*



Very sorry for your loss, Barb.


----------



## BarbBBW

tonynyc said:


> _(((( Barb)))) so sorry for your loss. My condolences & prayers for your Mom, you & family at this very difficult time..._





Adrian said:


> I am so sorry to hear about your mother you have my condolences. You and all of your family have my prayers.
> 
> Adrian





chocolate desire said:


> Barb I am very sorry to hear about your mom.





luscious_lulu said:


> Barb, I'm sorry to hear about your mom. *big hugs*





TraciJo67 said:


> Very sorry for your loss, Barb.



Thank you all, it means to much to me, that I have you all


----------



## Surlysomething

knottedsouls said:


> After waiting over 6 weeks, I finally got a response from my ex partner on September first in regards to our now four year son... she's not sure she can trust me or that I will follow through in reguards to visitation and contact with our son.
> 
> She broke off our relationship in early November '08( mostly due to the fact that I would not quit my job that she hated that I have had before we started going out several years ago) and promised that she would never keep my son away from me.
> 
> I had supported her both previous to our relationship and all throughout(housing, food, clothing, overall financially) due to illness ( she had several bouts of leukemia) for 7 years and then once she was well she got pregnant via a generous donation form a close friend, I supported her and him the last nearly five because she didnt want to put our son into childcare due to her own fears and insecurities and refused to find a job.
> 
> .... Im not sure how much more proof of my ability to 'follow through' she needs.
> 
> I last saw my son on April 27th of this year, and now unless my ex changes her mind, Ill not see him again until he is old enough to make his own decisions...as I was not able to legally adopt him while she and I were together due to financial constraints and the legal recourse left to me will cause more harm then good in the end for my son.( who is the one who is most important in this scenerio)
> 
> I've been trying to get on with living my life...some days its really hard and I get so sad I can barely stand it. Like today, I just miss him horribly.
> I went from seeing my little boy everyday, watching spongebob ( I know bad show but my goodness it made him laugh) and seasame street every morning with him before work and putting him to bed everynight, going to sleep watching him sleep in his crib/bed to not seeing him for close to five months...and now, I may not see him for years or ever...




I'm so very sorry for your situation. Your ex is horrible for doing this. That is your son and you should be able to have in him your life. Hopefully one day your country will get with the goddamn program. From the sound of it YOU should have primary custody.

I wish there was something more I could say...I can't imagine the heartache you must feel. -big hug-


----------



## mergirl

BarbBBW said:


> *Well today was the worst day of my life. My mother, passed away this morning. As many of you know , she had a massive stroke back in October, and it made her life very hard. So , I am happy, she is at rest, but it doesnt make the heartache any less.*


I am so sorry for your loss. ((((((Barb))))))).


----------



## Surlysomething

just feeling teary...


----------



## mergirl

knottedsouls said:


> After waiting over 6 weeks, I finally got a response from my ex partner on September first in regards to our now four year son... she's not sure she can trust me or that I will follow through in reguards to visitation and contact with our son.
> 
> She broke off our relationship in early November '08( mostly due to the fact that I would not quit my job that she hated that I have had before we started going out several years ago) and promised that she would never keep my son away from me.
> 
> I had supported her both previous to our relationship and all throughout(housing, food, clothing, overall financially) due to illness ( she had several bouts of leukemia) for 7 years and then once she was well she got pregnant via a generous donation form a close friend, I supported her and him the last nearly five because she didnt want to put our son into childcare due to her own fears and insecurities and refused to find a job.
> 
> .... Im not sure how much more proof of my ability to 'follow through' she needs.
> 
> I last saw my son on April 27th of this year, and now unless my ex changes her mind, Ill not see him again until he is old enough to make his own decisions...as I was not able to legally adopt him while she and I were together due to financial constraints and the legal recourse left to me will cause more harm then good in the end for my son.( who is the one who is most important in this scenerio)
> 
> I've been trying to get on with living my life...some days its really hard and I get so sad I can barely stand it. Like today, I just miss him horribly.
> I went from seeing my little boy everyday, watching spongebob ( I know bad show but my goodness it made him laugh) and seasame street every morning with him before work and putting him to bed everynight, going to sleep watching him sleep in his crib/bed to not seeing him for close to five months...and now, I may not see him for years or ever...



Such a sad situation. Maby you should think about seeing a lawer. I know nothing about American law but you must have some rights.


----------



## mergirl

I was feeling a bit sad, then i saw what horrible things everyone here was going through and i had to think myself lucky..
Love and light energies to everyone going through a tough time. x


----------



## TraciJo67

Surlysomething said:


> I'm so very sorry for your situation. Your ex is horrible for doing this. That is your son and you should be able to have in him your life. Hopefully one day your country will get with the goddamn program. From the sound of it YOU should have primary custody.
> 
> I wish there was something more I could say...I can't imagine the heartache you must feel. -big hug-



If I'm interpreting what he is saying correctly, the child is not biologically his, nor was he married to his ex. Unfortunately, that being the case, he would likely need to plead his case in court to get visitation rights. 

If the child is biologically his, or if he legally adopted him, then it's a slam dunk. He's legally entitled to visitation, if not partial custody.

OP ... please consider hiring an attorney; I think that you may have a very solid case for visitation rights. You raised this boy from infancy, and for all intents & purposes, he is your son. I hope that things work out for you and for your boy.


----------



## mergirl

TraciJo67 said:


> If I'm interpreting what he is saying correctly, the child is not biologically his, nor was he married to his ex. Unfortunately, that being the case, he would likely need to plead his case in court to get visitation rights.
> 
> If the child is biologically his, or if he legally adopted him, then it's a slam dunk. He's legally entitled to visitation, if not partial custody.
> 
> OP ... please consider hiring an attorney; I think that you may have a very solid case for visitation rights. You raised this boy from infancy, and for all intents & purposes, he is your son. I hope that things work out for you and for your boy.



Oh. I thought it was two women.. confusion. Ok..same advice applies. Avitars fuck me up.. can i just say...


----------



## Surlysomething

TraciJo67 said:


> If I'm interpreting what he is saying correctly, the child is not biologically his, nor was he married to his ex. Unfortunately, that being the case, he would likely need to plead his case in court to get visitation rights.
> 
> If the child is biologically his, or if he legally adopted him, then it's a slam dunk. He's legally entitled to visitation, if not partial custody.
> 
> OP ... please consider hiring an attorney; I think that you may have a very solid case for visitation rights. You raised this boy from infancy, and for all intents & purposes, he is your son. I hope that things work out for you and for your boy.




They were a gay couple. I'm not sure what kind of laws would protect her from a situation like this. It makes me sad either way.


----------



## JohnWylde

I feel sad because I seem to have been separated from my love for an eternity.

Everything has seemed to conspire to keep us apart - financial problems family problems to mention just two.

When I think things are getting sorted, something else crops up.

Hopefully it wont be too long now though - and I do realise that this is trivial compared with what others may be suffering.

John W


----------



## TraciJo67

Surlysomething said:


> They were a gay couple. I'm not sure what kind of laws would protect her from a situation like this. It makes me sad either way.



I didn't look at the OP's post -- I read it snipped from someone else's. OP, I'm sorry for the confusion. Still, I think you may have some legal rights. I hope so. You raised your son from infancy, and you should absolutely be entitled to legal rights to parent him. I'm so sorry that this is happening to you. I freeze up inside when I think of anything ever separating me from my (adopted) son.


----------



## Sugar

I feel lonely. I even struck up a conversation with the clerk at Walgreens. I need to get out more.


----------



## Surlysomething

I was in a car accident tonight.

Rear-ended VERY hard. I'm so sore and uncomfortable.


----------



## luscious_lulu

Surlysomething said:


> I was in a car accident tonight.
> 
> Rear-ended VERY hard. I'm so sore and uncomfortable.


*hugs*
As someone who had a similar incident beginning of July; go see a doctor right away. Get x-rays and if he recommends them (he should), anti-inflammitories <sp> or muscle relaxants. Also, lots of heat on whatever is sore. Hot showers or baths work well.

It's really important to document everything as well. You never know what crop up in the future or how long you will be sore. I'm still in pain from the accident that I was in.


----------



## OneWickedAngel

Surlysomething said:


> I was in a car accident tonight.
> 
> Rear-ended VERY hard. I'm so sore and uncomfortable.



I'm glad you're okay considering, but listen to Luscious_lulu. Get yourself checked-out. There are so many things that can happen internally that by the time we feel it, it has turned into a much bigger than expected. Better to know for sure everything is okay.


----------



## Saoirse

I was sad watching Kanye West totally ANNIHILATE Taylor Swift's moment on the VMAs.

This makes me feel kinda pathetic, but I totally felt for the girl.


----------



## BigCutieAriel

I'm sad because i've lost the ability to walk due to peripheral neuropathy


----------



## Adamantoise

BarbBBW said:


> *Well today was the worst day of my life. My mother, passed away this morning. As many of you know , she had a massive stroke back in October, and it made her life very hard. So , I am happy, she is at rest, but it doesnt make the heartache any less.*



I'm truly sorry for your loss,Barb...


----------



## HottiMegan

The news just said Patrick Swayze died. I'm sad. I have enjoyed his movies my entire life


----------



## Surlysomething

HottiMegan said:


> The news just said Patrick Swayze died. I'm sad. I have enjoyed his movies my entire life




It's so heartbreaking. I wanted desperately not to believe all the tabloid bullshit about him but in the end he was just too sick. His poor wife, they were married 34 years. 

RIP Patrick, your movies will always make me smile. Dirty Dancing, The Outsiders, Ghost, To Wong Foo....and on...and on..


----------



## MisticalMisty

pancreatic cancer is truly a bastard. It's bascialy the only incurable cancer. My grandmother had it..it's absolutely horrible. I feel so sorry for his wife and his family.

I hope they find peace soon.


----------



## mossystate

BigCutieAriel said:


> I'm sad because i've lost the ability to walk due to peripheral neuropathy



I am so sorry about this.


----------



## Rowan

I miss mike but he has a busy life that i dont fit into much right now *shrug* 

I cant get in to see the psychiatrist, which is a new one now since the last one's residency ended. i called and left a request for a refill on my meds and the new idiot left me a vm telling me to call her and leave her a vm, but didnt leave her number....stupid. So..ive been off both my cymbalta and trazadone (anti anxiety and anti depressant) for a while now and Im really starting to feel the effects...like i'm sad all the time right now and feel like crying too often and i find that i am getting overly angry at things sometimes. and to make matters worse, i dont always know where i stand in my relationship, if at all.

*sigh* I hate being like this.


----------



## saucywench

Having MY trust violated.


----------



## IwannabeVERYfat

I am sad about the state of the economy, and My current lack of employment


----------



## dynomite_gurl

Being in a LDR right now


----------



## Sugar

dynomite_gurl said:


> Being in a LDR right now



I feel ya...I really really do.


----------



## JerseyGirl07093

BigCutieAriel said:


> I'm sad because i've lost the ability to walk due to peripheral neuropathy



I have peripheral neuropathy too. I started a thread about neuropathy on the health board if you're interested. There are at least a few of us here that have it. It helps to not fell so alone because I know that when you have neuropathy you feel that way and you also feel like no one understands just what you're going through. Probably because they don't! Unless you have it you really don't understand. I don't like to think of just how bad neuropathy can get because I have no idea how far mine will advance. Losing the ability to walk is a fear of mine as I do have some trouble already.
If you ever want to talk you can PM me. Just know that you're not alone and that I'm thinking of you.


----------



## ssflbelle

I am sad as I am having trouble with my electric mobility device for the past week. Had a dead battery replaced Wednesday and now today it was dead again even though it had been charge. Now I have to wait for a brake part to come in, 5 to 7 business days. I only work one day a week so I hope I get the part installed in time for work next Tuesday. But now I am stuck at home and can't go anywhere as I need that scooter to do everything.  I really feel trapped.


----------



## Surlysomething

luscious_lulu said:


> *hugs*
> As someone who had a similar incident beginning of July; go see a doctor right away. Get x-rays and if he recommends them (he should), anti-inflammitories <sp> or muscle relaxants. Also, lots of heat on whatever is sore. Hot showers or baths work well.
> 
> It's really important to document everything as well. You never know what crop up in the future or how long you will be sore. I'm still in pain from the accident that I was in.



Thanks. I feel much better today.


----------



## Admiral_Snackbar

Surlysomething said:


> I was in a car accident tonight.
> 
> Rear-ended VERY hard. I'm so sore and uncomfortable.


I would say having had family members in a similar situation: See a doctor, document everything and keep contact with your insurance company. Settlements these days get harder to finalize (because of course from years of people abusing the system) and the insurance companies we so honorably pay into to help us often end up cornholing us when it comes to payouts--especially in this economy.

This is even more complicated if the drivers of both vehicles have the same insurance company (which happened in our case). They don't like robbing Paul to pay Paul's less safety-conscious little brother.

Get well and hope it all works out for you!


----------



## goofy girl

My honey is upset right now and I can't do anything about it but be here for him. I just want him to be happy. It hurts to see him so sad.


----------



## bobbleheaddoll

someone hit a deer on the busy road on my way home...it had just happened and they guy pulled over and was on the cell on the side of the road...but the poor deer was not dead and lying in the road suffering...i cried all the way home...still upset. :really sad:


----------



## thejuicyone

I'm smitten as can be & he's not here. *sighs*


----------



## HottiMegan

Three things are making me cranky today:
I have a stomach bug.. no fun
Hubby's out of town for three days
both kids decided to be extra troublesome since dad's out of town. 
All this combined made for a really tiring, sucky day.


----------



## Ruffie

I am worried about two of my little grandbabies who got very sick last night. They are only 22 months old and had a cold/flu. My daughter in law and son were at work with us when they got a call that one had a seizure and stopped breathing and both had high temperatures. His mom and sister got her breathing again and they raced home to the farm to get the babies to the ER. Adopted son called me from the hospital last night to update me but I haven't heard anything since about 11pm. Don't want to call in case they are catching up on sleep as they may have been in the emergency room for quite some time last night. So on pins and needles worrying about them.


----------



## HottiMegan

Oh Ruffie, i sure hope they are okay. I can't imagine how scared you are! I hope you hear from your family soon so you know more.


----------



## mossystate

Just found out my brother's girlfriend miscarried a few months back. I don't think it is going to happen for them, and it would have been so wonderful.


----------



## Surlysomething

Ruffie said:


> I am worried about two of my little grandbabies who got very sick last night. They are only 22 months old and had a cold/flu. My daughter in law and son were at work with us when they got a call that one had a seizure and stopped breathing and both had high temperatures. His mom and sister got her breathing again and they raced home to the farm to get the babies to the ER. Adopted son called me from the hospital last night to update me but I haven't heard anything since about 11pm. Don't want to call in case they are catching up on sleep as they may have been in the emergency room for quite some time last night. So on pins and needles worrying about them.




Thinking of you and the babies. Kids are resilient!


----------



## Gingembre

I am feeling like i've just been slapped in the face and i have a strong feeling that everything I was really happy about is about to go completely tits up


----------



## Surlysomething

Gingembre said:


> I am feeling like i've just been slapped in the face and i have a strong feeling that everything I was really happy about is about to go completely tits up




I hope it's not as bad as you think...


hang in there


----------



## Leesa

I am  I miss my pals from the Cape and wish I were with them again this weekend.
HURRY UP NJ!


----------



## 1300 Class

Just been one of those "did nothing, achieved nothing, monotony" days. Still sad about not being employed.


----------



## Gingembre

Gingembre said:


> I am feeling like i've just been slapped in the face and i have a strong feeling that everything I was really happy about is about to go completely tits up





Surlysomething said:


> I hope it's not as bad as you think...
> 
> hang in there



Pretty much was as bad as I thought...am full of that "why aren't i good enough for anyone" feeling this evening. Ace.


----------



## Rowan

Gingembre said:


> Pretty much was as bad as I thought...am full of that "why aren't i good enough for anyone" feeling this evening. Ace.



I completely feel you there sweetheart. After being told recently (as im sure you saw my posts) that im the "perfect girlfriend" and that I "did everything right" but still got dumped...I've been in a pretty damn dark place since then and honestly have sometimes sighed in disappointment when i've woken up in the morning some days.

So if you need someone to talk to, im here to commiserate with *hugs*


----------



## Gingembre

Rowan said:


> I completely feel you there sweetheart. After being told recently (as im sure you saw my posts) that im the "perfect girlfriend" and that I "did everything right" but still got dumped...I've been in a pretty damn dark place since then and honestly have sometimes sighed in disappointment when i've woken up in the morning some days.
> 
> So if you need someone to talk to, im here to commiserate with *hugs*



Thanks Rowan, I had seen your posts *hugs*. I wasn't at the "in a relationship" stage, but I really hoped we were heading that way - he's in the US and i'm in the UK, but I'm moving to the US in a few months time and was hoping to have a proper go at things. Now it seems I am still in the running, but so is someone else. I'm 10 hours and a few time zones away, she is minutes (or possibly hours, i dont know) away and thus requires less effort. This is not a fair fight, and not one I think I can win. I feel I have slipped conveniently onto the subs bench and that hurts.


----------



## bigsexy920

A person that I really like and admire took me off their facebook. Im not sure why and I dont think it would be right to ask. 

But it makes me sad for some reason.


----------



## Gingembre

bigsexy920 said:


> A person that I really like and admire took me off their facebook. Im not sure why and I dont think it would be right to ask.
> 
> But it makes me sad for some reason.



Ohhh, that really does suck. I know what you mean about wanting to ask, but you just cant can you? Gah, i feel ya *hugs* x


----------



## Mini

I just heard one of my college profs died of cancer. He was only diagnosed in April.

Wow.


----------



## Rowan

Mini said:


> I just heard one of my college profs died of cancer. He was only diagnosed in April.
> 
> Wow.



that sucks...sorry to hear *hugs*


----------



## Sugar

I'm sad my check was short from being sick. I hate being stressed about money.


----------



## Shosh

That a man that I thought cared about me is being psychologically abusive towards me.


----------



## Mathias

Susannah said:


> That a man that I thought cared about me is being psychologically abusive towards me.



 ((((((Hugs))))))


----------



## mossystate

Lucky said:


> I'm sad my check was short from being sick. I hate being stressed about money.



I'm sorry, Sharah.


----------



## Green Eyed Fairy

It's kinda sad that I go out with a nice guy....and have the need to mentally dissect what makes me uncomfortable about it all :blink:


----------



## saucywench

Cowardly men who blame women for their own shortcomings/ faults/ character flaws/ deep-rooted psychological issues. That is abuse of an almost criminal nature and a transgression of which few are greater.

Well...at least in the eyes of God, perhaps.


----------



## HDANGEL15

bigsexy920 said:


> A person that I really like and admire took me off their facebook. Im not sure why and I dont think it would be right to ask.
> 
> But it makes me sad for some reason.


*
GLAD TO KNOW i am not that only one this has happened too *


----------



## HDANGEL15

*I am sad because my 47 yr old brother has fallen in love with a 27 yr old woman that is the first woman in his 10 yrs of divorce that i REALLY REALLY DIG...and she is going to break his heart...and she is a single mom of an especially amazing 2 yr old

but much sadder...her 19 yr old sister died in a car accident Monday in NJ, with a 1/2 gallon of vodka and determined to be driving 100mph... 

she lived with my bros gf and her daughter....she is devastated

what a loss...19 yr old and done....*


----------



## Rowan

...that it seems like decent, honest, mature, FA's who actually know what love means dont exist. At least nowhere near me...


----------



## DeniseW

they do but sometimes it seems like you'll never find them....the one day that I decided to stop looking was when I met my husband. I know it doesn't always happen like that but there are decent men out there. 






Rowan said:


> ...that it seems like decent, honest, mature, FA's who actually know what love means dont exist. At least nowhere near me...


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

I just found out my uncle passed away today.. no one in my family bother to call and let me know. I had to find out on Facebook. Kinda down right now... Wishin my baby was here to hold me.


----------



## Surlysomething

EllorionsDarlingAngel said:


> I just found out my uncle passed away today.. no one in my family bother to call and let me know. I had to find out on Facebook. Kinda down right now... Wishin my baby was here to hold me.




Awww. I'm so sorry for you loss and sorry your family were thoughtless.


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

Surlysomething said:


> Awww. I'm so sorry for you loss and sorry your family were thoughtless.


Thank You Surly.. It's sad, but that is how they are sometimes..shrugs..I will forgive them though. I am sure they are upset about it. :/


----------



## buttbooger

EllorionsDarlingAngel said:


> I just found out my uncle passed away today.. no one in my family bother to call and let me know. I had to find out on Facebook. Kinda down right now... Wishin my baby was here to hold me.



Something similar happened like that to me when My grandmother passed 5 yrs ago. My uncle did tell my mom and all, in turn she told me, BUT it wasnt until about a week later that my uncle told me she had been sick for a long time and that she passed on alone in a rest home. My uncle had my number too. Had I known, I would have been able to take leave and be at her bedside or atleast visited knowing she was sick. Matter of fact, I did try reaching her house by phone several times during that final week, my uncle who lived there could have returned my phonecalls, his fingers were not broke. Sorry your family was not considerate.

Anyhoo, what makes me sad at this time is, not financially fit to save up and move back out west to las vegas. Had a ball living in Las Vegas before I enlisted in the service. Stuck in a small jerry springer town for now, lol.


----------



## Sugar

Erin, I'm so sorry for your loss. (((Hugs)))


I'm so sad that my medication is simply not working and I feel like there isn't much I can do about that.


----------



## Ruffie

I am so sorry for your loss compounded with the feelings about our family right now *healing hugs*


----------



## Gingembre

EDA, I am sorry for your loss and that your family weren't more considerate *hugs*


----------



## CAMellie

R.I.P. Stephen Spencer Jones February 4, 1949 - October 2, 2009

You will be missed, Uncle.


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

buttbooger said:


> Something similar happened like that to me when My grandmother passed 5 yrs ago. My uncle did tell my mom and all, in turn she told me, BUT it wasnt until about a week later that my uncle told me she had been sick for a long time and that she passed on alone in a rest home. My uncle had my number too. Had I known, I would have been able to take leave and be at her bedside or atleast visited knowing she was sick. Matter of fact, I did try reaching her house by phone several times during that final week, my uncle who lived there could have returned my phone calls, his fingers were not broke. Sorry your family was not considerate.
> 
> Anyhoo, what makes me sad at this time is, not financially fit to save up and move back out west to las vegas. Had a ball living in Las Vegas before I enlisted in the service. Stuck in a small jerry springer town for now, lol.


Yeah families can be something else sometimes. Yeah my mom called my sister and told her but didn't call me. Oh well not gonna hold it against her. Hope you are able to get back to Vegas as soon as you can. 



Lucky said:


> Erin, I'm so sorry for your loss. (((Hugs)))
> 
> 
> I'm so sad that my medication is simply not working and I feel like there isn't much I can do about that.


Thank You Lucky! 

I hope your meds kick in and start to work.



Ruffie said:


> I am so sorry for your loss compounded with the feelings about our family right now *healing hugs*


Thank You Ruffie! Yeah it is upsetting but I will not let it get me down.



Gingembre said:


> EDA, I am sorry for your loss and that your family weren't more considerate *hugs*


Thank You Hon!



CAMellie said:


> R.I.P. Stephen Spencer Jones February 4, 1949 - October 2, 2009
> 
> You will be missed, Uncle.


I'm sorry for your loss *hugs*


----------



## CAMellie

EllorionsDarlingAngel said:


> I'm sorry for your loss *hugs*



And I'm sorry for yours. *hugs*


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

CAMellie said:


> And I'm sorry for yours. *hugs*


Thank you hon *Hugs*


----------



## BigCutieSasha

Not being with Ben. By the time he gets here in late late october, it will be almost 5 months since we last saw each other. I'm at that point where it's pretty much all I think about.


----------



## Gingembre

MsSasha said:


> Not being with Ben. By the time he gets here in late late october, it will be almost 5 months since we last saw each other. I'm at that point where it's pretty much all I think about.



I kinda know how you feel, and it really does suck *hugs*

But, to look on the bright side, at least it is now October - you're getting there


----------



## Red

MsSasha said:


> Not being with Ben. By the time he gets here in late late october, it will be almost 5 months since we last saw each other. I'm at that point where it's pretty much all I think about.



Awww, yeah it does suck, BUT it is kinda exciting too, soak up and enjoy all that lovely excitement!! :happy:



*squee*


----------



## buttbooger

EllorionsDarlingAngel said:


> Yeah families can be something else sometimes. Yeah my mom called my sister and told her but didn't call me. Oh well not gonna hold it against her. Hope you are able to get back to Vegas as soon as you can.



Thank you. Hope things are falling back into place after your loss. Wont be overnight, but it will happen.


----------



## HottiMegan

My knee makes me sad. I fell when i was 13 and it never healed properly. So every once and a while the pain would flare up for a couple of days. Well this latest flare up has been hurting for like 2 months. It doesn't hurt anymore but it's weak as hell because i have been babying it. It's really hard to go up the stairs while holding Alex and three bags of heavy groceries. I miss my strong body.


----------



## Saoirse

I think my favorite character on Sons Of Anarchy might have just been killed off. They ended the episode with him laying in a pool of blood.

Its petty and ridiculous to be this upset over a TV show... but he's the best 

and he's Scottish and a total babe!


----------



## BrownEyedChica

My sister over-baked my cookies and I can't eat them like that. They aren't burnt.. but not soft and chewy. I was sooooo craving them. I'm almost in tears. Silly I know. 
I'm also sad because I'm about to be 27 and it doesn't help that I'm pms'ing and I'm sooo sleep deprived. Ugh.

I think I'm falling back in to my depressive state... that makes me very sad. I didn't like the person I was then...
All the little things bother me when they really shouldn't. *sigh*


----------



## Jes

life.




pants


----------



## archivaltype

Gingembre said:


> Thanks Rowan, I had seen your posts *hugs*. I wasn't at the "in a relationship" stage, but I really hoped we were heading that way - he's in the US and i'm in the UK, but I'm moving to the US in a few months time and was hoping to have a proper go at things. Now it seems I am still in the running, but so is someone else. I'm 10 hours and a few time zones away, she is minutes (or possibly hours, i dont know) away and thus requires less effort. This is not a fair fight, and not one I think I can win. I feel I have slipped conveniently onto the subs bench and that hurts.



I feel you. 
It sucks to be the one who's left behind because someone else is easier.  
I hate feeling like I'm not worth the effort.


----------



## Saoirse

Gingembre said:


> Thanks Rowan, I had seen your posts *hugs*. I wasn't at the "in a relationship" stage, but I really hoped we were heading that way - he's in the US and i'm in the UK, but I'm moving to the US in a few months time and was hoping to have a proper go at things. Now it seems I am still in the running, but so is someone else. I'm 10 hours and a few time zones away, she is minutes (or possibly hours, i dont know) away and thus requires less effort. This is not a fair fight, and not one I think I can win. I feel I have slipped conveniently onto the subs bench and that hurts.




Oh Ive been there! A guy I was hanging out with (and getting very close to) couldn't decided between me and his ex. Its kind of switched though, since she's a few hours away and I'm just down the road. But they were together for 4 years and she's not handling the break-up well, and he feels bad and blah blah blah!

I explained it as being the understudy. No one wants to be an understudy


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

MsSasha said:


> Not being with Ben. By the time he gets here in late late october, it will be almost 5 months since we last saw each other. I'm at that point where it's pretty much all I think about.



It's coming, it's coming!  One week of October is over, and the rest will fly by faster than you think.  Just keep really busy, and the time will go by faster.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

HottiMegan said:


> My knee makes me sad. I fell when i was 13 and it never healed properly. So every once and a while the pain would flare up for a couple of days. Well this latest flare up has been hurting for like 2 months. It doesn't hurt anymore but it's weak as hell because i have been babying it. It's really hard to go up the stairs while holding Alex and three bags of heavy groceries. I miss my strong body.




I'm so sorry about your knee . I understand about the chronic pain. It's awful to live with and effects so many aspects of your life. I miss my strong body too. :really sad:

((((((HUGS)))))))


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Lucky said:


> I'm sad my check was short from being sick. I hate being stressed about money.



Oh that sucks. I'm going through the same thing.  Hopefully finances will improve, or I'll have to sell my body at the street corner.  I have a feeling finances still wouldn't improve. lol


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Susannah said:


> That a man that I thought cared about me is being psychologically abusive towards me.



((((((((Hugs to you, Susannah))))))))


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

HDANGEL15 said:


> *I am sad because my 47 yr old brother has fallen in love with a 27 yr old woman that is the first woman in his 10 yrs of divorce that i REALLY REALLY DIG...and she is going to break his heart...and she is a single mom of an especially amazing 2 yr old
> 
> but much sadder...her 19 yr old sister died in a car accident Monday in NJ, with a 1/2 gallon of vodka and determined to be driving 100mph...
> 
> she lived with my bros gf and her daughter....she is devastated
> 
> what a loss...19 yr old and done....*



I'm so, so sorry about your loss.


----------



## Surlysomething

i'm sick as a dog..


----------



## bigsexy920

Watching someone you love make huge and clear mistakes and not being able to do anything about it.


----------



## BBW4Chattery

Realizing that even if I did everything right and as planned for the rest of my days, I'm still living the reality that from birth, my life was so different from most people's that few will ever truly understand who I am and where I came from family-wise.


----------



## Green Eyed Fairy

BBW4Chattery said:


> Realizing that even if I did everything right and as planned for the rest of my days, I'm still living the reality that from birth, my life was so different from most people's that few will ever truly understand who I am and where I came from family-wise.



It makes you sad that you are "different"? Different is often times....quite good. 
I understand where you are coming from about the family......but that was yesterday. The rest of your life........is yours. Isn't that wonderful?


----------



## HDANGEL15

*MY eye is burning and watering really bad from a corneal ulcer.....and it HURTS....and its tearing o yeah I said that *


----------



## CAMellie

I have 3 teeth that are causing me agony, no dental insurance, and no money to pay to have them fixed.


----------



## Gingembre

HDANGEL15 said:


> *MY eye is burning and watering really bad from a corneal ulcer.....and it HURTS....and its tearing o yeah I said that *



Ouch, that does NOT sound fun. *hugs*


----------



## luscious_lulu

Green Eyed Fairy said:


> It makes you sad that you are "different"? Different is often times....quite good.
> I understand where you are coming from about the family......but that was yesterday. The rest of your life........is yours. Isn't that wonderful?



I tried to rep you, but apparently I have to spread the love around first...


----------



## Ruffie

One of our new staff passed away this weekend of a heart attack.


----------



## ButlerGirl09

This sinking feeling that I can viscerally feel... I'm not sure why, but nothing ever seems to work out for me. However, I'm starting to think that I'm never meant to be happy.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

ButlerGirl09 said:


> This sinking feeling that I can viscerally feel... I'm not sure why, but nothing ever seems to work out for me. However, I'm starting to think that I'm never meant to be happy.



You took the words right out of my mouth. Hopefully we're just having a bad day.....or a bad stretch of days.


----------



## BBW4Chattery

Knowing that all of the optimism and hope in the world can't overcome basic math... and worse, not having anyone to vent to about all of the fear and frustration that follow that realization.


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

That's its been raining all day and I haven't been able to get out of the house...blah...plus have a lot on my mind..


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

I'm beyond sad that I had to stop a possible relationship with a guy because of circumstances I couldn't control.

Just when you get a ribbon of hope it slips through your hands.


----------



## CAMellie

It suddenly hit me last night that, in less than 2 months, I'll be 38...and I have nothing to show for it. I've accomplished NOTHING that I had hoped to. Stupid mid-life crisis.


----------



## archivaltype

ButlerGirl09 said:


> This sinking feeling that I can viscerally feel... I'm not sure why, but nothing ever seems to work out for me. However, I'm starting to think that I'm never meant to be happy.



Hugs for you, BG. 

I'm sorry you feel this way. Life has a way of screwing us over sometimes, you know? But...heh. I dunno. I believe that everything, good and bad, happens for a reason. So..whatever is going on with you...you'll make it. And you'll be stronger when you get through it. Believe it, girlie. :happy:


----------



## italianmike21

that my 5 days of fun with that special someone has come to a close


----------



## HottiMegan

i hurt my ankle tripping on Max's shoes that were in the middle of the hallway. I almost fell because i was holding Alex and ended up hurting my foot/ankle muscles instead. It sucks. Hours later my foot still hurts.


----------



## cinnamitch

My son showed me this. A dog was best friends with this kitten and the dog died

http://img26.imageshack.us/img26/5925/cimg4405s.jpg

I hate pictures like this.. Cause i cry too much


----------



## thatgirl08

I'm sad that I have to get up in 5 hours. I hate when I decide to go out when I know I have class in the morning.. especially when I spent 15 dollars to end up spending at least 50% of my night taking care of my _insanely_ drunk best friend. It was still a pretty good time.. but I need sleeeeeep.


----------



## SSQT

People are disappointing and will always let you down....life is shit quite often...


----------



## Fonzy

Job prospects, man this country really has gone downhill since the Celtic Tiger farted lol


----------



## Surlysomething

Three lanes of thick rush hour traffic in the pouring rain.
SUV beside me, big dog sticks his head out the window. I turn and glance at it.
Lexus SUV in front of me slams on her brakes.
I'm in a courtesy car because mine is in the shop getting the $5K worth of damage fixed on it from when someone rear-ended the crap out of me.
Not very familiar with courtesy car. Slam on brakes. Slide into her SUV tapping the bumper.

No damage though. She got out and checked. Courtesy car's license plate took the brunt. I'll kick that back into place. But still. All I can do now is hope that she doesn't claim some huge injury damage for nothing. I don't trust ANYONE anymore. I need to think good thoughts.



Dipwad that lives above me decided to have all her friends over last night and keep the volume at full blast until 1am. I have a job. I'm NOT happy about this.

It's Friday and it feels like a Monday.


----------



## Sugar

italianmike21 said:


> that my 5 days of fun with that special someone has come to a close



Me too.

Also my aunt is having some real issues with her health and I'm so very sad for her trials.


----------



## Tania

I am remembering the Loma Prieta earthquake today. I was fourteen and quite traumatized by the quake itself and the ensuing destruction. We were seeing pictures of the Cypress Structure portion of the 880 - completely crushed - and hearing that the Bay Bridge had collapsed (we didn't know yet that it was merely one small segment of the upper deck). We saw images of wasted buildings in the Marina District and assumed that the destruction was representative of the entire City.

We couldn't call our relatives because communication in or out of the 415 was toasted. 

For a moment, we thought our world had ended.

I still cry when I think about it.


----------



## OIFMountaineer

A friend of mine, a guy I served with in Iraq, lost his battle with cancer. A young man, a husband, dad, and soldier and police officer. Fuck you cancer.


----------



## Surlysomething

OIFMountaineer said:


> A friend of mine, a guy I served with in Iraq, lost his battle with cancer. A young man, a husband, dad, and soldier and police officer. Fuck you cancer.




I agree. FUCK YOU, cancer.

(i'm sorry for the loss of your young friend)


----------



## snuggletiger

I 2nd that motion. I am still hoping Cancer gets Cancer.


----------



## Sugar

I'm having a very hard time not feeling like a huge failure in life and I'm sick of feeling sick.


----------



## OneWickedAngel

One of my best friends put down her cat of 17 years last night.


----------



## Aust99

It's done before it begun....  I'll get over it...


----------



## Mathias

I've been depressed lately. I just feel indifferent towards everything. Even the fact that my 21st birthday is soon isn't getting me excited. :really sad:


----------



## MzDeeZyre

Spending 6 days with people who accept you, and truely care about your well being..... then returning home after a horrible travel experience, being sick as a dog, and missing those people you adore like crazy..... damn you feelings!!


----------



## HottiMegan

Max's surgery was rescheduled like 17 hours before it was scheduled to take place. It was so hard getting this surgery in the first place to have it rescheduled so close to the date. i'm so glad i didn't get a hotel room yet!! I'm so frustrated though. He had rescheduled doctors appointments like 4 times before and now the surgery is getting rescheduled.. i just hope the new date sticks. I'm sad because it might mess up Max's desire for trick or treating on halloween, his favorite holiday!


----------



## Surlysomething

HottiMegan said:


> Max's surgery was rescheduled like 17 hours before it was scheduled to take place. It was so hard getting this surgery in the first place to have it rescheduled so close to the date. i'm so glad i didn't get a hotel room yet!! I'm so frustrated though. He had rescheduled doctors appointments like 4 times before and now the surgery is getting rescheduled.. i just hope the new date sticks. I'm sad because it might mess up Max's desire for trick or treating on halloween, his favorite holiday!




That sucks! I hope the little dude doesn't miss out on Halloween though.. 

((Max))


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

I leave on the Nov 2..that is what is making me sad right now Also my grandpa has cancer..Another family member..I don't know how many I am going to loose this yr.


----------



## HottiMegan

Surlysomething said:


> That sucks! I hope the little dude doesn't miss out on Halloween though..
> 
> ((Max))



Thanks. He's milking his disappointment for all he can get. He got us to take him out to dinner last night and took him shopping. We have a stroller that can accommodate both kids, so I'm hoping he can still do some trick or treating and just ride the stroller when he needs to rest. 
We all got let down by the change in schedule.


----------



## snuggletiger

wow chauffered trick or treating, <thats how you got to spin it> i hope Max has a great holiday.


----------



## Sugar

I'm sad that I work for an insurance company that is very light on communication. I'm pretty scared about being allowed to go on short term disability to get my issues under control and my boss kept stopping herself when she was talking to me. Now I'm referred to HR in Boston...I'm in Colorado.


----------



## PhatChk

I am sad because I am lonely. I could be in a room full of suitors and still leave the room alone. And the guy I did really like I was to shy to pursue. Yes I know it is my fault.  I am starting to believe there might be wrong with me. :sigh: lol


----------



## Gingembre

I understand how you feel, PhatChk *hugs*

I am sad because yet AGAIN I am not good enough for the guy I like to want to take a chance on me. Good enough for a shower of (hollow?) compliments, but just not good enough for him to take that leap of faith.

Jeeez, what is wrong with me?? This guy was about as far away from the last failed effort as it is possible to be, and yet I am once again a seemingly good friend & potential lover down.


----------



## italianmike21

I'm lonely and I dont feel like I can turn to anyone for comfort because they dont understand what I'm going through


----------



## Saoirse

Gingembre said:


> Jeeez, what is wrong with me?? This guy was about as far away from the last failed effort as it is possible to be, and yet I am once again a seemingly good friend & potential lover down.



Theres nothing wrong with you! But obviously, there's something wrong with him.


----------



## Gingembre

Saoirse said:


> Theres nothing wrong with you! But obviously, there's something wrong with him.



Ahhh thanks :happy:


----------



## JoyJoy

I miss the "good old days" when it felt like "home" here. Too many ghosts, drama, contention/arguing and unsavory issues here these days. Makes me want to leave and never return...but I'm not sure I'm ready for that. No "goodbye cruel world" threads, though, I promise.


----------



## GTAFA

Sad for two people...It's been a funny day. I enjoyed myself, but even so, two different people told me things about their lives that made me sad.

PERSON A is unemployed, and sad that she doesn't have a job. It's hard to know what to tell someone who doesn't feel hope, because hope is a big part of finding a good job. And let's face it, a big part of it is beyond our control. The economy, the employers, the match between skills and available work... it's all chance. I hope she can find something.

PERSON B is precisely the opposite. Where person A has no job, person B is miserable, over-worked, furious that he has taken on too much. I wish he knew how to say "no", to protect himself. He's ANGRY. We talked and I tried to help him vent, because he's also very lonely. No wonder, I suppose... Poor guy.

I feel that person "A" is in a tough situation, but person "B" positively scares me, living such a painfully unhappy life. I take comfort in how lucky I am (yes things in my life SUCK...but it could be way way worse)...., but wish I could help both these people.


----------



## Sugar

I'm sad that if I have an issue with my partner I can't fix it in person.


----------



## Captain Save

I'm sad today because someone I love has been having a particularly nasty string of bad luck lately, and there's nothing I can do to fix it for her. I know it's partly a guy thing to fix problems, but it's also a desire just to make her happy for her own sake. I guess I just worry about her, even though I know she'll persevere and emerge like a rose in the end.


----------



## Horseman

Unrequited love.


----------



## Ernest Nagel

JoyJoy said:


> I miss the "good old days" when it felt like "home" here. Too many ghosts, drama, contention/arguing and unsavory issues here these days. Makes me want to leave and never return...but I'm not sure I'm ready for that. No "goodbye cruel world" threads, though, I promise.



Totally get how you feel, JJ. Less and less like a community here and more like a game of dodge ball played with rotten fruit, dead kittens and no rules or time limits.


----------



## Ruffie

Sick Grand kids with all the H1N1 scares the parents and me every time they get a fever and other symptoms that could be tied to the illness.


----------



## sirGordy

Horseman said:


> Unrequited love.



Been there, done that, guy. You have my thoughts and sympathies.


----------



## GoldenDelicious

I've been there, thinking of you. I hope things go as well as they can and wishing you strength in the difficult times xx



EllorionsDarlingAngel said:


> I leave on the Nov 2..that is what is making me sad right now Also my grandpa has cancer..Another family member..I don't know how many I am going to loose this yr.


----------



## Inhibited

Next episode of Glee, Season 1 Episode 9, "Wheels," will air in the US on November 11, 2009.

No i can't cope with the break, what is happening over there that would make them take it off air for a few weeks? :sad: I will get over it though, and i know that there are other things in the world that are far more upsetting, but let me have my moment..


----------



## Fonzy

I never got my Danger Mouse costume!


----------



## littlefairywren

That I have two friends, who are both suffering in their own way, and there is nothing I can do to truly help either. That makes me sad


----------



## HottiMegan

I'm a little sad at the outcome of Max's ear surgery. I am hoping that with time, it will look better. They also say there might be a few more operations in the future to make it more "normal" looking. I had to change the bandages and it was a greusome site. Good to know that i'm not a weakling when it comes to nasty wound cleaning and dressing changes. (good to know if i want to be a nurse) I just don't think his ear looks that much different. All the suffering he did the last three days might be for not a big change on his ear. It saddens me.


----------



## Inhibited

Friends cancelled Saturday night on me  anyone want to take their place?


----------



## Ruffie

I have a cold/flu bug and tomorrow is the triplets 2nd birthday party as well as my former boss and friend (well shes a role model to me) and her husbands 40th anniversary . Was supposed to go to the two parties and take pictures and visit and socialize. Now I fear I will be sitting at home so as not to spread the bug around. Hubby said he would go and take pictures for me, but I am bummed out I have to miss the parties.


----------



## HottiMegan

Going back to the hospital this weekend. I'm really sad about this. Max's ear has a cartilage infection. They want him for the entire weekend minimally to pump him full of IV antibiotics. When hubby gets home from work, we're hitting the road. I hate the hospital. Max is going to be really upset. He's not home from school yet and i don't look forward to telling him. The hospital is 90 miles away and if he has to stay past Sunday, hubby's got to go home for work. So i'll be stuck 90 miles away without a car and without help to watch Alex. I'm very down today.


----------



## Surlysomething

HottiMegan said:


> Going back to the hospital this weekend. I'm really sad about this. Max's ear has a cartilage infection. They want him for the entire weekend minimally to pump him full of IV antibiotics. When hubby gets home from work, we're hitting the road. I hate the hospital. Max is going to be really upset. He's not home from school yet and i don't look forward to telling him. The hospital is 90 miles away and if he has to stay past Sunday, hubby's got to go home for work. So i'll be stuck 90 miles away without a car and without help to watch Alex. I'm very down today.



Poor little dude.

Try and hang in there, chickie. -hug-


----------



## sugar and spice

HottiMegan said:


> Going back to the hospital this weekend. I'm really sad about this. Max's ear has a cartilage infection. They want him for the entire weekend minimally to pump him full of IV antibiotics. When hubby gets home from work, we're hitting the road. I hate the hospital. Max is going to be really upset. He's not home from school yet and i don't look forward to telling him. The hospital is 90 miles away and if he has to stay past Sunday, hubby's got to go home for work. So i'll be stuck 90 miles away without a car and without help to watch Alex. I'm very down today.



Aww I'm sorry Megan, poor little guy I hope he heals up very fast and you get to come home as soon as possible.


----------



## Ruffie

Sorry to hear that Meagan. Hope all goes well and you all get through ok.


----------



## OneWickedAngel

Aww Damn Megan. You really are having a go of it right now. Hang in there; Max will be fine soon enough. Hugs to you, Max, your hubby and Alex.


----------



## HottiMegan

Thank you guys. To save on money (since rent was just paid and we had expenses from the surgery last week) i am staying home with Alex so we don't have to rent a hotel room for all weekend. If he has to stay past Sunday, hubby will come up and pick me up to stay with Max from Sunday on so he can go to work. Max and i sobbed while he left. Not a fun day.


----------



## HottiMegan

Just wanted to give you guys a quick update. Max is doing fine. They took three tries to do a proper IV on the poor guy. The nurses felt so bad that they gave him 6 new gifts. (spoiled much? His cute face gets a lot of people to do stuff above and beyond. It's happened his whole life  ) Max only got about 5 hours of sleep but he's doing fine. They think he'll be released tomorrow sometime. He cried to me on the phone today talking about how much he missed me. Both of my boys are very mama-centered. The reason hubby went down to the hospital instead of me was because he'd be a little more comfy than me in the sleeping furniture they have being shorter and 150+lbs smaller than me. Thanks for all the thoughts and well wishes. On a good note, aside from the infected area the rest of the surgical areas are great and healing big time.


----------



## sugar and spice

HottiMegan said:


> Just wanted to give you guys a quick update. Max is doing fine. They took three tries to do a proper IV on the poor guy. The nurses felt so bad that they gave him 6 new gifts. (spoiled much? His cute face gets a lot of people to do stuff above and beyond. It's happened his whole life  ) Max only got about 5 hours of sleep but he's doing fine. They think he'll be released tomorrow sometime. He cried to me on the phone today talking about how much he missed me. Both of my boys are very mama-centered. The reason hubby went down to the hospital instead of me was because he'd be a little more comfy than me in the sleeping furniture they have being shorter and 150+lbs smaller than me. Thanks for all the thoughts and well wishes. On a good note, aside from the infected area the rest of the surgical areas are great and healing big time.



That is really good news Megan I am so glad he's going to be coming home tomorrow and you guys found a way to make this stressful situation a little easier, big hugs to Max.


----------



## Surlysomething

HottiMegan said:


> Just wanted to give you guys a quick update. Max is doing fine. They took three tries to do a proper IV on the poor guy. The nurses felt so bad that they gave him 6 new gifts. (spoiled much? His cute face gets a lot of people to do stuff above and beyond. It's happened his whole life  ) Max only got about 5 hours of sleep but he's doing fine. They think he'll be released tomorrow sometime. He cried to me on the phone today talking about how much he missed me. Both of my boys are very mama-centered. The reason hubby went down to the hospital instead of me was because he'd be a little more comfy than me in the sleeping furniture they have being shorter and 150+lbs smaller than me. Thanks for all the thoughts and well wishes. On a good note, aside from the infected area the rest of the surgical areas are great and healing big time.



I'm glad he's doing well, Megan.  He deserves to be spoiled after this whole ordeal.


----------



## Ruffie

That's good news Meagan. Thanks for updating us!


----------



## OneWickedAngel

Oh thank goodness! Now you can exhale! Hugs




to you Megan.


----------



## HottiMegan

thank you guys. Max is about a half hour from home now. He's anxious to get home. We have to go back down for a doctors appointment first thing in the morning but he's home and finally has the meds for home care too.


----------



## Neen

ending of a 4.5 yr relationship.. been going on and off since june. He's having a 'i hate nina, lets be mean to her day'. UGH. men.


----------



## Green Eyed Fairy

Neen said:


> ending of a 4.5 yr relationship.. been going on and off since june. He's having a 'i hate nina, lets be mean to her day'. UGH. men.



Sounds like Nina needs to have "I am going to cut me up an asshole up today if he doesn't back off" day 


Sorry to hear this is happening to you....and understand how painful endings can be.....


----------



## Red

I'm off work today as I've been under the weather lately, nothing serious but I've been moaning and feeling sorry for myself but sadly what I'm about to write helps to bring it all into perspective.

A few weeks ago an old school friend of mine passed away suddenly and it's been on my mind on and off since. I didn't make it to her funeral and I have never met her parents and brother but last night I dreamt I met them all. 

I was in the family kitchen making food with her dad, the food was an old family favourite of sliced apples with peanut and toffee sauce on them. We didn't talk and I didn't see his face but we stood slicing apples for sometime. I hear people come into the house and I turn to see my friends brother and we introduce ourselves to each other and he then leaves the room. My friends mother then walks in and take her hands, they are small and very thin. Her face is sad and tired and I hug her for a long time and then the dream ends.


This morning I wake up thinking about the dream as it was so clear in my head and the feeling of sadness was so strong in my heart. 

I've just logged on to my computer to find out from a friend that the brother was killed yesterday in an accident. I am so shocked right now, and overwhelmed by a massive feeling of saddness. That poor family.


----------



## MisticalMisty

Oh my gosh Red. I'm so sorry. Sending thoughts and prayers to that family.


----------



## Rowan

I was gone from dims for a good while, apparently no one really noticed or even really gave a damn which really kind of sucks and it makes me wonder if i should bother being as active here again as i used to be.


----------



## mimosa

God bless you and your son. I hope he'll feel better soon. *hugs*




HottiMegan said:


> thank you guys. Max is about a half hour from home now. He's anxious to get home. We have to go back down for a doctors appointment first thing in the morning but he's home and finally has the meds for home care too.


----------



## mimosa

Kinda fell in love with someone overseas. But it's not the right time.


----------



## moore2me

Rowan said:


> I was gone from dims for a good while, apparently no one really noticed or even really gave a damn which really kind of sucks and it makes me wonder if i should bother being as active here again as i used to be.



Rowan,

I see that you were missing for about a month in mid October to just a few days ago. 'Hope you weren't sick or a family member wasn't ill. I hope you were marooned on a pacific island with ________________ (your choice of person(s) and a case of _______________(Your choice of consumable beverages) and two cases of gourmet MREs.


----------



## Rowan

moore2me said:


> Rowan,
> 
> I see that you were missing for about a month in mid October to just a few days ago. 'Hope you weren't sick or a family member wasn't ill. I hope you were marooned on a pacific island with ________________ (your choice of person(s) and a case of _______________(Your choice of consumable beverages) and two cases of gourmet MREs.




lol thanks


----------



## Inhibited

Am having a Lauren and Heidi situation with my Best friend..


----------



## littlefairywren

Inhibited said:


> Am having a Lauren and Heidi situation with my Best friend..



Hun, I am sorry you are having a bad time ......but who are Lauren and Heidi?


----------



## Inhibited

littlefairywren said:


> Hun, I am sorry you are having a bad time ......but who are Lauren and Heidi?



lol From the reality show, The Hills, Lauren and Heidi were best friends until Heidi started dating Spencer...


----------



## littlefairywren

Inhibited said:


> lol From the reality show, The Hills, Lauren and Heidi were best friends until Heidi started dating Spencer...



Ah, I see. So your best friend has a Spencer. Talk to her hun, maybe she does not realise you are hurting. Big hugs to you ((((Inhibited))))


----------



## Sugar

I threw my back out which wasn't so terrible but then it caused a flare up.  I feel like I can't catch a GD break.


----------



## mossystate

Goddamn, Sarah...I am so sorry.


----------



## Sugar

mossystate said:


> Goddamn, Sarah...I am so sorry.



Thanks, it'll be OK...one day we're going to have shirts that say "save the joints and the tata's". I'm working on that now with all of my free time. :happy:


----------



## mossystate

Sugar said:


> Thanks, it'll be OK...one day we're going to have shirts that say "save the joints and the tata's". I'm working on that now with all of my free time. :happy:



Just don't mess up and have it say, " save the jointed tata's ". You will have more than your share of inquisitive pervs.


----------



## Mathias

Being stuck in the "just friends" zone. :really sad:


----------



## Sugar

mossystate said:


> Just don't mess up and have it say, " save the jointed tata's ". You will have more than your share of inquisitive pervs.



Well my tata's are double jointed and they were in the circus for a time...but that's besides the point.


----------



## Gingembre

Sugar said:


> Well my tata's are double jointed and they were in the circus for a time



 You're THAT Sarah??? :bow:



On a serious note...hope you are feeling better soon *gentle hug*


----------



## Sugar

Gingembre said:


> You're THAT Sarah??? :bow:
> 
> 
> 
> On a serious note...hope you are feeling better soon *gentle hug*



LMAO!

Yeah...world famous double jointed tata's as seen on Ripley's Believe It or Not!

Thank you for the hugs!!


----------



## mossystate

* goes to post on Ripley's FB page *


----------



## Sugar

mossystate said:


> * goes to post on Ripley's FB page *



You tell her that I expect my royalties for that private show I gave her!


----------



## mossystate

Sugar said:


> You tell her that I expect my royalties for that private show I gave her!




Tell her yourself!!


Sheesh.


I don't get paid enough for ALL your demands!


----------



## Saoirse

I am incredibly sad that Amanda Palmer is doing a show (RIGHT NOW!) about 30 minutes from me...and her incredible boyfriend NEIL GAIMAN is there!!!!!! 2 of my most favorite people in the world are minutes from me and I CANT SEE THEM!!!!!! And I just learned about it tonight!

*cries*


----------



## djudex

I'm feeling more lonely tonight than I have in a great long while.


----------



## Donna

mossystate said:


> * goes to post on Ripley's FB page *


^^^ This ^^^ explains a LOT. I thought Mossy had lost her freaking mind. That'll teach me to read FB before logging into Dims.


----------



## dynomite_gurl

I'm leaving for Ireland on Tuesday and I can feel the sore throat coming!!


----------



## iwasneveranormalgirl

my aunt keeps bothering me about how concerned she is about my weight and as much as I try to tell her to stop because I'm perfectly fine how I am she wont quit.

I guess I'm more pissed than sad but damnn its getting my self esteem down!


----------



## mergirl

dynomite_gurl said:


> I'm leaving for Ireland on Tuesday and I can feel the sore throat coming!!


Don't worry.. its probably just an excitment sore throat!!!  Enjoy your trip! Drink a pint of guinness for me!!


----------



## Sugar

Snobs.


----------



## GTAFA

The immediate cause? BRAZIL, the film by Terry Gilliam. It's so full of brilliant images that anticipate the world we now live in.

But I am also sad that negativity seems to sell. Dark images of the future excite critics. A positive image of the future? that would not only be original, but also RISKY given that critics prefer dark and nasty.

I watched Brazil as the second part of a double bill of Terry Gilliam movies on TVO, the public television outlet in Toronto. The first film --Adventures of Baron Munchausen is as positive as Brazil is negative. Listening to the critics talk about the Baron --and Gilliam-- was really discouraging. Gilliam's career is a case study in the forces of the market, and how one has to make money to gain freedom. I suppose there's nothing all that surprising in this; but it's still discouraging.

And of course, BRAZIL itself is full of dark and nasty images.


----------



## Aliena

I'm sad that I've been having some panic attacks that have left me to the point of being paralyzed to leave my home. I get physically sick and feel a great sence of doom. I've become a big introvert, as if I weren't already, so I guess I've become a bigger introvert. I'm not sure why I'm posting this here, except maybe to let some of you I know why I've been so aloof. So that as they say is that.


----------



## Jay West Coast

Rwanda tied in their last World Cup Qualifying match, so despite their phenomenal improvement, high discipline, and passionate effort, the Amavubi Stars fell short of qualification. Tough day for a country who has worked so hard in ways like this to supersede the shame of its past.

And I'm sad cuz I'm not going home for Christmas. (Not related to Point A.)


----------



## Filly

I'm sad because I'm lonely


----------



## littlefairywren

A big cyber hug to you (((((Filly)))))


----------



## LoveBHMS

Because somebody I knew killed himself.

And I can say...and anyone can say he had everything to live for. But that is not the point. He suffered from depression and was apparently bipolar and that can't be trumped by all the love and academic and professional success in the world.

Suicide is counterintuitive. Self preservation is a basic biological drive. You swat at a fly, it moves. You poke at an amoeba under a microscope, it moves to escape pain. A fish caught on a hook or a bear caught in a trap will fight to save itself.

Yet some people have the will to commit suicide. I won't consider it selfish. If he was in pain, he had the right to end that pain. He had the right to put his well being ahead of anyone else's.

Still....somebody I know killed himself.


----------



## littlefairywren

LoveBHMS said:


> Because somebody I knew killed himself.
> 
> And I can say...and anyone can say he had everything to live for. But that is not the point. He suffered from depression and was apparently bipolar and that can't be trumped by all the love and academic and professional success in the world.
> 
> Suicide is counterintuitive. Self preservation is a basic biological drive. You swat at a fly, it moves. You poke at an amoeba under a microscope, it moves to escape pain. A fish caught on a hook or a bear caught in a trap will fight to save itself.
> 
> Yet some people have the will to commit suicide. I won't consider it selfish. If he was in pain, he had the right to end that pain. He had the right to put his well being ahead of anyone else's.
> 
> Still....somebody I know killed himself.



I am so sorry

I had a friend who also killed himself, and it is a terrible feeling. Hugs.


----------



## GTAFA

I saw another use of the phrase "closet FA" on this site today. I find the phrase upsetting because i think that the use of the phrase condones various sorts of abuse. 

I find the metaphor of the closet FA really disturbing and immoral. Whereas the closet GAY had reason to stay in the closet --such as fear of getting beaten up or killed (in some countries it's very dangerous to be gay)-- there is no comparable reason for closet FAs other than having it both ways.

If i am wrong -- that is, if peer pressure and the insecurity of the so-called closet FA is somehow more substantial than i am portraying it, i would invite someone to show me the error of my ways. Please, convince me. Right now, i find the phrase offensive, and part of the larger culture of fat phobia. A person who honestly hates fat people is less offensive to me (only makes me nauseous ?) than someone who secretly desires people of size, while keeping quiet about that preference.


----------



## mergirl

I agree, it is horrible. I had to turn down an invite to one of my 'friends' birthday parties recently because his dad is a sleazy closet Fa as well as being an all round bawbag. My friend actually found a porno called 'hefty mama's' under his dads bed when we were about 14, but of course his wife is super thin and mega paranoid about gaining weight (has even had surgery) because the WANKER goes on about how he hates fat people. A few years ago i went to a party and i had gained some weight and he basically followed me around drunkenly saying awful shit to me while touching me up! I just took the piss out of him and left... he is an awful, disgusting wee man who utterly sickens me. He was actually mid rant about fat women when a fat woman actually walked in and looked sad. I could have killed him. Anyway, there was no way i was going to subject myself or my partner to his sleazy, closeted fucked upness... so i didn't go to the party. I am afraid i would kick him in the balls.. i was very close last time.. NOT only that but he is a fucking bigot.. he actually said he "hated catholics"!! He kept going on about how he was a protestant, so i asked what church he goes to and he said he was not a christian... stupid fuck didn't even know you had to be a christian to be a protestant!!! Oh man!!!! Anyway.. at the last party i started singing "The fields of athen rye" just to piss him off... oh GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!
ooops sorry GTAFA.. that was quite a rant i had there.. when all i ment to say was .. "I agree"!!


----------



## GTAFA

As an FA i can only guess at the horrors a woman experiences in the presence of such hypocracy. And isn't it amazing the way those who have something they conceal (such as a genuine lust for BBWs) are sometimes the worst offenders? 

Thanks for sharing. BTW, i felt a bit weird talking about this because there are so many closet FAs on this site. Thanks for removing some of my upset, because i was afraid i was out of order posting.


----------



## mergirl

No way..you did good. I don't think there is an excuse for closeted Fa's.. erm i think i started a thread about this a while ago which turned into a bit of a clusterfuck mind.. but the majority here feel there is no need to be in the closet. Though, most dont feel the need to wear "I heart fat chicks" t-shirts either. I guess its about not denying that you like fat people.. well thats what i think.


----------



## Sugar

I'm not sure this is sad but maybe more disappointed/confused/perplexed. 

There are actual "scientific museums" that show panoramas with humans AND dinosaurs in the same scene. Like they lived together...like some little house on the prairie scene. 

I get it that some people have different beliefs, but...people roaming with dinosaurs. Really? C'mon...for real? The earth is only 6000 years old...really? Goodness.


----------



## mossystate

Sadly...I could never walk next to a man wearing an I Love Fat Chicks teeshirt. Of course, that goes for NASCAR on one...I Found It...If You Can't Dazzle Them With Brilliance, Baffle Them With Bullshit...and, anything Ed Hardy.



Cheese belongs on crackers.


----------



## LisaInNC

That they are ripping up perfectly good clothes over on the paysite board when there are so many people who could use those clothes.


----------



## mergirl

Sugar said:


> I'm not sure this is sad but maybe more disappointed/confused/perplexed.
> 
> There are actual "scientific museums" that show panoramas with humans AND dinosaurs in the same scene. Like they lived together...like some little house on the prairie scene.
> 
> I get it that some people have different beliefs, but...people roaming with dinosaurs. Really? C'mon...for real? The earth is only 6000 years old...really? Goodness.





LisaInNC said:


> That they are ripping up perfectly good clothes over on the paysite board when there are so many people who could use those clothes.



Sorry, i found both there things funny!! 
Also, how do we know that dinosaurs didnt wear clothes? we don't!!


----------



## mergirl

mossystate said:


> Sadly...I could never walk next to a man wearing an I Love Fat Chicks teeshirt. Of course, that goes for NASCAR on one...I Found It...If You Can't Dazzle Them With Brilliance, Baffle Them With Bullshit...and, anything Ed Hardy.
> 
> 
> 
> Cheese belongs on crackers.


I would quite like to get one of those "No fat chicks" t-shirts.. meerly for irony. In order for this visual gag to be funny i would constantly have to be running after fat women benny hill style, winking and trying to honk their boobies. To be honest, it will be less effort just to go get a plain t-shirt.. gah.. real life bores me..


----------



## Inhibited

The Polly waffle is being discontinued :sad:


----------



## littlefairywren

Inhibited said:


> The Polly waffle is being discontinued :sad:



LOL, I thought they were extinct ages ago. I have not thought about those in ages. OMG....craving one now


----------



## Inhibited

i have one once in a while, gonna see how many are left and buy them all..


----------



## OneWickedAngel

Oh course you know this American had to Google that :blush:


----------



## littlefairywren

OneWickedAngel said:


> Oh course you know this American had to Google that :blush:



Yes, yes....oh wow I am going to beat you Inhibited!
Thanks OWA, now I remember what to look for


----------



## Sugar

A tooth that I thought had been fixed is killing me and last visit I maxed out my insurance.


----------



## Inhibited

littlefairywren said:


> Yes, yes....oh wow I am going to beat you Inhibited!
> Thanks OWA, now I remember what to look for



Did you find any?? I went to wollies and they didn't have any:sad


----------



## littlefairywren

Inhibited said:


> Did you find any?? I went to wollies and they didn't have any:sad



No, I did not see any! Bugga!
But I did see some Mars Bars.....yum

Ooh, I know....why don't you call up whoever makes them hun. See if they know where to score


----------



## Inhibited

Seen a little girl about 1 yesterday wondering the streets by herself, hope she is ok..... yes we did stop and a lady who was going for a walk said she was from a government agency and took her, so hopefully she is who she says she is, and we did report it to the police..


----------



## mergirl

littlefairywren said:


> No, I did not see any! Bugga!
> But I did see some Mars Bars.....yum
> 
> Ooh, I know....why don't you call up whoever makes them hun. See if they know where to score


I can only eat mini mars bars not big ones (Though i can eat about 10). Weird yes, but when i was little my nana used to bring us chocolate bars on a sunday. Once she brought me a 2 king sized mars bars. I ate one and asked my mum if i could eat the other one and she said "No you will be sick" and i was all "NO i wont" and i ate it.. and puked. I have been wary of them ever since and realised that you should listen to mums as they know some things!


----------



## littlefairywren

mergirl said:


> I can only eat mini mars bars not big ones (Though i can eat about 10). Weird yes, but when i was little my nana used to bring us chocolate bars on a sunday. Once she brought me a 2 king sized mars bars. I ate one and asked my mum if i could eat the other one and she said "No you will be sick" and i was all "NO i wont" and i ate it.. and puked. I have been wary of them ever since and realised that you should listen to mums as they know some things!



Ha ha ha....not all mums. That reminds me of a hot summers day at the beach when I was 12. I got caught in a rip and remembered what mum taught me "if you get into trouble, don't panic. Just raise your hand and I will get help". All good, until I got into trouble. So I could see mum there on the beach, I raised my hand and..............she waved HELLO!


----------



## mergirl

littlefairywren said:


> Ha ha ha....not all mums. That reminds me of a hot summers day at the beach when I was 12. I got caught in a rip and remembered what mum taught me "if you get into trouble, don't panic. Just raise your hand and I will get help". All good, until I got into trouble. So I could see mum there on the beach, I raised my hand and..............she waved HELLO!


oh dear! That reminds me of a poem...though i can't remember who it was by or what it is called.. so i'm not much help really! lol. Though there is a bit about "drowning not waving".
A simmilar thing happened to me this year on holiday.. i was getting groped in the sea by a cheeky guy who spoke no english (and i speak no spanish!)- I was waving to my gf on the beach to come rescue me with her wee bit of spanish she knows and she waved back at me... a hello! By this point the guy had taken his wee red trunks off, was swinging them around his head and saying 'Amigo?' in a come hither way... it was a palava.


----------



## tinkerbell

That it snowed last night.


----------



## Rowan

Trying really hard not to cry right now...i was net surfing earlier and my laptop screen went pure white, so I shut it down with the power button and tried to restart it and it wouldnt boot up. It wouldnt even get to where i could start it in safe mode, nothing. So I took it to best buy since its less than 6 months old and i bought the warantee on it (THANK GOD!!!) and the guy tried switching a couple of the memory chips saying that helps sometimes, and that wasnt it, so that led him to the conclusion that my motherboard is fried since it wouldnt even start to boot. This wouldnt be a huge deal if all my school work werent on it and if finals werent about to start over the next week. I know God wont give me more than I can handle, but I really didn't need this particular trail at this time. Right before finals...I mean, give me a break. 

Thankfully I have a desktop computer, but its quite a bit slower and now i have to download MS Visual Basic onto it along with Adobe Flash CS4 and rebuild both things i worked very hard on building the last couple of days to resubmit for my courses since everything is now gone and lost from my laptop. 

*super super bummed out*


----------



## Rowan

Inhibited said:


> The Polly waffle is being discontinued :sad:



I literally just left a European grocery store that just opened for business just this week and saw that and wondered about it. Is it any good? what is it exactly?


----------



## dynomite_gurl

I had to leave Ireland and it went by too quickly


----------



## Saoirse

I have this friend that is a huge downer. I feel as though I cant talk to him about anything because he'll just say something to make me sad or pissed off.

I know he doesnt do it deliberately, but its like the boy doesnt have a damn filter!


----------



## littlefairywren

I am sad right now, because I have waited for so long for him to say what he said last night. But there was a sting in the tail, and it is hurting more than I thought it would. More than he will ever realise


----------



## tinkerbell

That my foot feels better, but my Dr told me I cant run until the xray comes back, and I go back in Jan.


----------



## HottiMegan

My computer may be dying.  I don't want to have to buy a new one. This one is set up the way i like it. My computer tech hubby says it might just be a driver issue. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that is the case. wahhh.


----------



## mergirl

That i have neuralga and one whole side of my face hurts and i need to write out xmas cards using one eye.. Basically i am sad for me.. which is a bit selfish.. but ouch.. Ok.. maby down is more descriptive than sad. I have no people here but my cat is lying on my leg giving me good cat healing vibes. Painkillers are not working and i just have to wait it out..  miserable.


----------



## ItsLikeRachel

Trying to write a 1500 word essay... I've been trying to write it for two days, I have major writers block.
I have until 3pm tomorrow to write it!


Kinda stressful time at uni, my psoriasis has flared up and it's kinda painful:doh:


----------



## luscious_lulu

mergirl said:


> That i have neuralga and one whole side of my face hurts and i need to write out xmas cards using one eye.. Basically i am sad for me.. which is a bit selfish.. but ouch.. Ok.. maby down is more descriptive than sad. I have no people here but my cat is lying on my leg giving me good cat healing vibes. Painkillers are not working and i just have to wait it out..  miserable.



That's not at all selfish. (((hugs))) Feel better soon.


----------



## OneWickedAngel

mergirl said:


> That i have neuralga and one whole side of my face hurts and i need to write out xmas cards using one eye.. Basically i am sad for me.. which is a bit selfish.. but ouch.. Ok.. maby down is more descriptive than sad. I have no people here but my cat is lying on my leg giving me good cat healing vibes. Painkillers are not working and i just have to wait it out..  miserable.









Oh sweetie, not selfish at all! Sending some cyber healing hugs! May the pain go away very soon.


----------



## DeniseW

I am sad for Butch, he got some bad news this morning and I know he's worried and upset and that makes me sad for him....


----------



## mossystate

Went to put a small live decorated Christmas tree and some flowers on my parents' graves...and seeing how obvious it was that nobody had been there in a long time. Family members who live near ( a few...very near ), can't be bothered. I can't get there often, as I don't own a car. Supposed caring people who just don't care. Sorry, Mom and Dad.


----------



## OneWickedAngel

DeniseW said:


> I am sad for Butch, he got some bad news this morning and I know he's worried and upset and that makes me sad for him....



Oh man, that's gotta suck especially right after such a great weekend. I hope whatever it is, it all works out. {hugs}



mossystate said:


> Went to put a small live decorated Christmas tree and some flowers on my parents' graves...and seeing how obvious it was that nobody had been there in a long time. Family members who live near ( a few...very near ), can't be bothered. I can't get there often, as I don't own a car. Supposed caring people who just don't care. Sorry, Mom and Dad.



{{Mossy}} As someone so eloquently stated in Steely's thread, when you lose the people you love, you don't lose the relationship. 

It's probably not that they (the closer family members) don't actually _care _. It's probably more that they figure it's so close, they can get to it any time. Next thing you know months have passed and they just never got around to it. It doesn't make it any better for you, except to know when no one else made the effort YOU did and that is all that really matters.


----------



## mossystate

OneWickedAngel said:


> {{Mossy}} As someone so eloquently stated in Steely's thread, when you lose the people you love, you don't lose the relationship.
> 
> It's probably not that they (the closer family members) don't actually _care _. It's probably more that they figure it's so close, they can get to it any time. Next thing you know months have passed and they just never got around to it. It doesn't make it any better for you, except to know when no one else made the effort YOU did and that is all that really matters.



OWA...thank you. I wish I did not know these particular family members so well, and know how little they did for my parents when my parents were alive ( one of the brothers, after my Mom had fractured a hip a few years before her death, said he was not going to do any housework for her....just to give you an example of the specialness of the situation, so I already knew that tending graves would be a red light ). Yeah, unfortunately what I said is the truth....but I certainly am glad roomie was nice enough to give up his only free day to get me down south! I always decorated my Mom's house, so, as long as I can get there/am alive, I will get her a tree. *s*


----------



## Fonzy

The budget!


----------



## ItsLikeRachel

the thought of having to do two presentations tomorrow


----------



## steely

My weekend away is going to be cancelled in 3..2..1..


----------



## Noir

been in and out of the hospital the past few weeks....just want to be better...


----------



## weaverof

I am sad right now because my friend told me that she is giving her kids up for adoption on Christmas. She's doing it for totally unselfish reasons, to give her kids a better life. She's sad and there's nothing I can do to make her feel better. Oh heck why not make it a rant, it's not like anyone cares.
I'm sad because I don't have money to move out on my own. I hate my job but I'm too afraid to find a new one. I'm afraid of moving so I won't. 
I'm sad because my college diploma is worthless and won't mean a good job.

I'm sad because people are in pain and suffereing all over the world every day and there's nothing I can do because I'm too afraid of moving and doing something.
I'm sad because I'm a quiet person who want nothing more to be left alone to die in peace but still has people telling him who to be every min of the day.
I'm sad because I can't express who I am the way I want to, not my sexuality, nor my love of bright colors, nor my love of the impracticle side of life.
I'm sad because I can get sex, but not love out of people. I'm sad that no matter how much I have it will never be enough. 
And I'm really sad because I'm typing this rant on a site that I use mainly for masturbation in a vain hope that someone will pat me on the back and say it's ok, or at least anything encouraging at all.

God I envy the dead.


----------



## Surlysomething

weaverof said:


> I am sad right now because my friend told me that she is giving her kids up for adoption on Christmas. She's doing it for totally unselfish reasons, to give her kids a better life. She's sad and there's nothing I can do to make her feel better. Oh heck why not make it a rant, it's not like anyone cares.
> I'm sad because I don't have money to move out on my own. I hate my job but I'm too afraid to find a new one. I'm afraid of moving so I won't.
> I'm sad because my college diploma is worthless and won't mean a good job.
> 
> I'm sad because people are in pain and suffereing all over the world every day and there's nothing I can do because I'm too afraid of moving and doing something.
> I'm sad because I'm a quiet person who want nothing more to be left alone to die in peace but still has people telling him who to be every min of the day.
> I'm sad because I can't express who I am the way I want to, not my sexuality, nor my love of bright colors, nor my love of the impracticle side of life.
> I'm sad because I can get sex, but not love out of people. I'm sad that no matter how much I have it will never be enough.
> And I'm really sad because I'm typing this rant on a site that I use mainly for masturbation in a vain hope that someone will pat me on the back and say it's ok, or at least anything encouraging at all.
> 
> God I envy the dead.



Sometimes you need to face your fears to let go of all the hurt and sadness you're carrying around. It can truly be liberating. I hope that the New Year finds you much happier.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

weaverof said:


> I am sad right now because my friend told me that she is giving her kids up for adoption on Christmas. She's doing it for totally unselfish reasons, to give her kids a better life. She's sad and there's nothing I can do to make her feel better. Oh heck why not make it a rant, it's not like anyone cares.
> I'm sad because I don't have money to move out on my own. I hate my job but I'm too afraid to find a new one. I'm afraid of moving so I won't.
> I'm sad because my college diploma is worthless and won't mean a good job.
> 
> I'm sad because people are in pain and suffereing all over the world every day and there's nothing I can do because I'm too afraid of moving and doing something.
> I'm sad because I'm a quiet person who want nothing more to be left alone to die in peace but still has people telling him who to be every min of the day.
> I'm sad because I can't express who I am the way I want to, not my sexuality, nor my love of bright colors, nor my love of the impracticle side of life.
> I'm sad because I can get sex, but not love out of people. I'm sad that no matter how much I have it will never be enough.
> And I'm really sad because I'm typing this rant on a site that I use mainly for masturbation in a vain hope that someone will pat me on the back and say it's ok, or at least anything encouraging at all.
> 
> God I envy the dead.



Oh weaverof!

I'm sad that you're so sad! :really sad:

I'm so sorry life's been so shitty for you. You know, for me, the holidays bring out so much sadness and despair for what I wish I had, not necessary material things, but emotional things, mainly peace of mind and freedom.

I too desperately want to move out on my own, but because of the lack of the ever-loving dollar, cannot . It's stifling when you want out, but cannot go.

To feel like you're helping with people suffering, volunteer. Go to Habitat for Humanity, be a Big Brother, walk dogs at the Humane Society. Do whatever pulls you. You don't have to move out to help others, nor do you have to hand money over. Often, actually doing something means more than forking over cash.

I don't know the details and I know it's extremely personal, but why can't you express your sexuality, wear bright colors, and be impractical (on occasion I don't see why that can be a problem.)? If you cannot wear bright colors at work or don't feel comfortable doing so, why not wear some on the weekend? As for the sexuality part, I don't have an answer for you. I'm guessing that you'll feel judged because you like fat women?? If that's the case, ask the men on the board for help. They should be able to help you let those fears go.

I'm sad that I cannot get sex or love out of people. I'm always "the friend" to men. I have just a handful of friends, and I feel a few truly love me as is, flaws and all.

Please don't be really sad that you use this site pretty much for masturbation and now want to be part of the greater community! It's ok to want a pat on the back and be told it's ok, don't give up, take hold of a dream to keep you going. A lot of us have to do that to push through the day.

You will get through this. The dead are dead. They can no longer help anyone. As hard as it is to be......try to be kind to yourself.

(((((Hugs))))) and love,
Mizz


----------



## 1300 Class

> I'm sad because I don't have money to move out on my own. I hate my job but I'm too afraid to find a new one. I'm afraid of moving so I won't.
> I'm sad because my college diploma is worthless and won't mean a good job.


Don't worry, your not the only one the boat. Count me in for it as well. 

For some reason, those particular thoughts were particulary with me today. It was just a sort of depressing day, a real mood killer. So instead of going about my work I just got out my notepad and wrote some of thoughts and words down. Nobody seemed to mind and it killed the time. Friday is always such a slow day.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

I'm on some local Freecycle groups and it breaks my heart to see so many people having to re-home their pets because they've had to move to cheaper places (apartments with no yards), cannot afford vet care, food, etc.....


----------



## mergirl

weaverof said:


> I am sad right now because my friend told me that she is giving her kids up for adoption on Christmas. She's doing it for totally unselfish reasons, to give her kids a better life. She's sad and there's nothing I can do to make her feel better. Oh heck why not make it a rant, it's not like anyone cares.
> I'm sad because I don't have money to move out on my own. I hate my job but I'm too afraid to find a new one. I'm afraid of moving so I won't.
> I'm sad because my college diploma is worthless and won't mean a good job.
> 
> I'm sad because people are in pain and suffereing all over the world every day and there's nothing I can do because I'm too afraid of moving and doing something.
> I'm sad because I'm a quiet person who want nothing more to be left alone to die in peace but still has people telling him who to be every min of the day.
> I'm sad because I can't express who I am the way I want to, not my sexuality, nor my love of bright colors, nor my love of the impracticle side of life.
> I'm sad because I can get sex, but not love out of people. I'm sad that no matter how much I have it will never be enough.
> And I'm really sad because I'm typing this rant on a site that I use mainly for masturbation in a vain hope that someone will pat me on the back and say it's ok, or at least anything encouraging at all.
> 
> God I envy the dead.


Its ok. x
...........


----------



## mergirl

MizzSnakeBite said:


> I'm on some local Freecycle groups and it breaks my heart to see so many people having to re-home their pets because they've had to move to cheaper places (apartments with no yards), cannot afford vet care, food, etc.....


That is really sad. 
We have a place called the P.D.S.A here (people's despensary for sick animals) and it is a charity where you can go if you need medicine or operations for your animals you get them for free. They ask for a donation if you can make one but if you can't its totally free. I think its a wonderful charity. Do they have anything like that in America?


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

mergirl said:


> That is really sad.
> We have a place called the P.D.S.A here (people's despensary for sick animals) and it is a charity where you can go if you need medicine or operations for your animals you get them for free. They ask for a donation if you can make one but if you can't its totally free. I think its a wonderful charity. Do they have anything like that in America?



None that I'm aware of (and I used to work for a vet). In some instances, where a pet needs very expensive surgery, sometimes (rare though) a hospital or vet will offer their services for free. This was rare to begin with, and becoming rarer.

People are even now asking for food for their pets.  Requesting the basics never happened before.


----------



## mergirl

MizzSnakeBite said:


> None that I'm aware of (and I used to work for a vet). In some instances, where a pet needs very expensive surgery, sometimes (rare though) a hospital or vet will offer their services for free. This was rare to begin with, and becoming rarer.
> 
> People are even now asking for food for their pets.  Requesting the basics never happened before.


Thats so sad. 
The only thing, animal wise i have noticed happening here is that people are having to give up their horses because they are too expensive to keep.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

mergirl said:


> Thats so sad.
> The only thing, animal wise i have noticed happening here is that people are having to give up their horses because they are too expensive to keep.



Around here (Texas), people often rather let their livestock starve rather than giving them up. Unlike cats and dogs, large animals, especially horses, are almost never put to sleep unless they're just suffering too much.

They're their property and they don't want to give their 'stuff' up.


----------



## mergirl

MizzSnakeBite said:


> Around here (Texas), people often rather let their livestock starve rather than giving them up. Unlike cats and dogs, large animals, especially horses, are almost never put to sleep unless they're just suffering too much.
> 
> They're their property and they don't want to give their 'stuff' up.


some people suck.


----------



## HottiMegan

My PS3 turned off and wont turn back on for more than a couple of seconds  Playing video games is a major way to escape when i'm down and now i only have a DS to play with


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

mergirl said:


> some people suck.



Isn't that the truth.


----------



## kinkykitten

My fingers... I have hardly been able to feel them for days now. Too damn cold! Me and -17oC for days does not bode well...


----------



## Rowan

Funny thing is, I dont know if I'm sad about this or not. Yesterday I went to the dr with shortness of breath and dizziness after coughing up blood and they were afraid i was having a pulmonary embolism. They wanted me to come to the hospital by ambulance, but i wasnt about to pay $400 bucks for the ambulance ride, so I called my dad to see if he could leave work to come pick me up from work to come get me, but he wasn't able, so he had my brother leave work to bring me thankfully...he's such a good kid (tried to have mom come give me a ride since she was off work, but was too busy making bread to leave it and come get me). 

They now say i have pneumonia (first time for that one) and that im having some cardiac stuff going on, so i'll be here in the hospital for a few days.
I guess the sad part of it is that as I was sitting there in the hallway of the hospital waiting to go back to my ER room before I knew what was going on, when all i knew was that it could be a pulmonary embolus and I could die at any time, I made my peace with God and I was ready to go then. 

So anyway...if I croak..y'all wont see me around anymore, and if I don't, well then you'll continue to see me post lol


----------



## Alan

Rowan said:


> Funny thing is, I dont know if I'm sad about this or not. Yesterday I went to the dr with shortness of breath and dizziness after coughing up blood and they were afraid i was having a pulmonary embolism. They wanted me to come to the hospital by ambulance, but i wasnt about to pay $400 bucks for the ambulance ride, so I called my dad to see if he could leave work to come pick me up from work to come get me, but he wasn't able, so he had my brother leave work to bring me thankfully...he's such a good kid (tried to have mom come give me a ride since she was off work, but was too busy making bread to leave it and come get me).
> 
> They now say i have pneumonia (first time for that one) and that im having some cardiac stuff going on, so i'll be here in the hospital for a few days.
> I guess the sad part of it is that as I was sitting there in the hallway of the hospital waiting to go back to my ER room before I knew what was going on, when all i knew was that it could be a pulmonary embolus and I could die at any time, I made my peace with God and I was ready to go then.
> 
> So anyway...if I croak..y'all wont see me around anymore, and if I don't, well then you'll continue to see me post lol



 
Rowan, Hope you are doing better...You are a very unique and valued woman...hope you get well soon!


----------



## DeniseW

Teddy Pendergrass died and I'll miss him, we went to see him a couple of years ago and he still put on a good concert, loved me some Teddy...


----------



## Rowan

Rowan said:


> Funny thing is, I dont know if I'm sad about this or not. Yesterday I went to the dr with shortness of breath and dizziness after coughing up blood and they were afraid i was having a pulmonary embolism. They wanted me to come to the hospital by ambulance, but i wasnt about to pay $400 bucks for the ambulance ride, so I called my dad to see if he could leave work to come pick me up from work to come get me, but he wasn't able, so he had my brother leave work to bring me thankfully...he's such a good kid (tried to have mom come give me a ride since she was off work, but was too busy making bread to leave it and come get me).
> 
> They now say i have pneumonia (first time for that one) and that im having some cardiac stuff going on, so i'll be here in the hospital for a few days.
> I guess the sad part of it is that as I was sitting there in the hallway of the hospital waiting to go back to my ER room before I knew what was going on, when all i knew was that it could be a pulmonary embolus and I could die at any time, I made my peace with God and I was ready to go then.
> 
> So anyway...if I croak..y'all wont see me around anymore, and if I don't, well then you'll continue to see me post lol



Thanks hon...dont have any test results back yet on the heart thing...hopefully this afternoon!


----------



## snuggletiger

I am sad about the folks in Haiti. Seeing how these people have nothing and yet tragedy strikes them and in the face of it trying to get through it. Just made me stop and look at the sunrise and realize how splendid it is at my mountaintop.


----------



## Tania

Seeing this thread on the Lounge index reminded me that I haven't seen/spoken to Ron in a longass time. That bums me out. Miss you, bro.


----------



## sugar and spice

Rowan said:


> Funny thing is, I dont know if I'm sad about this or not. Yesterday I went to the dr with shortness of breath and dizziness after coughing up blood and they were afraid i was having a pulmonary embolism. They wanted me to come to the hospital by ambulance, but i wasnt about to pay $400 bucks for the ambulance ride, so I called my dad to see if he could leave work to come pick me up from work to come get me, but he wasn't able, so he had my brother leave work to bring me thankfully...he's such a good kid (tried to have mom come give me a ride since she was off work, but was too busy making bread to leave it and come get me).
> 
> They now say i have pneumonia (first time for that one) and that im having some cardiac stuff going on, so i'll be here in the hospital for a few days.
> I guess the sad part of it is that as I was sitting there in the hallway of the hospital waiting to go back to my ER room before I knew what was going on, when all i knew was that it could be a pulmonary embolus and I could die at any time, I made my peace with God and I was ready to go then.
> 
> So anyway...if I croak..y'all wont see me around anymore, and if I don't, well then you'll continue to see me post lol



I'm sorry you're so sick, I hope everything checks out okay and you're feeling better really soon. No croaking allowed girl get better asap! :wubu:


----------



## Rowan

sugar and spice said:


> I'm sorry you're so sick, I hope everything checks out okay and you're feeling better really soon. No croaking allowed girl get better asap! :wubu:



Id be cool about it if the doctors would come back by! One doctor came by this morning with that somber look about my heart and stuff this morning and no one has been back since and they've had me hooked up to this heart monitor non stop since last night. It's like..a little news would be appreciated here! lol


----------



## snuggletiger

HottiMegan said:


> My PS3 turned off and wont turn back on for more than a couple of seconds  Playing video games is a major way to escape when i'm down and now i only have a DS to play with



I confess I don't know what the difference between a PS3 and a DS is


----------



## mossystate

Rowan said:


> Id be cool about it if the doctors would come back by! One doctor came by this morning with that somber look about my heart and stuff this morning and no one has been back since and they've had me hooked up to this heart monitor non stop since last night. It's like..a little news would be appreciated here! lol



Take comfort, if you can, that you are in the best place you can be right now. Hope everything goes well. Don't croak...that's an order.


----------



## Rowan

mossystate said:


> Take comfort, if you can, that you are in the best place you can be right now. Hope everything goes well. Don't croak...that's an order.



Yes ma'am 

well the good news is that the doctor finally came in and talked to me and said they got the cardiac enzyme tests came in and that they were normal, so it was NOT a heart attack. So on the one hand, that evokes a sigh of relief especially since im still pretty young, on the other hand, that means they still dont know what is causing my heart problems (normal heart rate for a 31 year old female is between 80 and 100 and mine even walking 10 feet jumps up to 160 almost...which they are very concerned about). So they are going to have a heart echo done tomorrow and some other stuff done. So..hopefully i'll have an answer soon.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Rowan said:


> Yes ma'am
> 
> well the good news is that the doctor finally came in and talked to me and said they got the cardiac enzyme tests came in and that they were normal, so it was NOT a heart attack. So on the one hand, that evokes a sigh of relief especially since im still pretty young, on the other hand, that means they still dont know what is causing my heart problems (normal heart rate for a 31 year old female is between 80 and 100 and mine even walking 10 feet jumps up to 160 almost...which they are very concerned about). So they are going to have a heart echo done tomorrow and some other stuff done. So..hopefully i'll have an answer soon.



I hope they're able to give you some more answers Rowan. It certainly is scary being in that position. I'm glad you're in a hospital. I hope you heal quickly and you better listen to Mizz Mossy!


----------



## Rowan

MizzSnakeBite said:


> I hope they're able to give you some more answers Rowan. It certainly is scary being in that position. I'm glad you're in a hospital. I hope you heal quickly and you better listen to Mizz Mossy!



Thank you for the well wishes Mizz...and dont miss the pic I just posted of me in my oh so cute hospital gown on the "what are you wearing now thread" lol


----------



## stan_der_man

Rowan said:


> ...
> well the good news is that the doctor finally came in and talked to me and said they got the cardiac enzyme tests came in and that they were normal, so it was NOT a heart attack. So on the one hand, that evokes a sigh of relief especially since im still pretty young, on the other hand, that means they still dont know what is causing my heart problems (normal heart rate for a 31 year old female is between 80 and 100 and mine even walking 10 feet jumps up to 160 almost...which they are very concerned about). So they are going to have a heart echo done tomorrow and some other stuff done. So..hopefully i'll have an answer soon.



I'm glad you are beginning to find some answers Rowan... My good thoughts and prayers to you that you find out what is wrong and start the healing process soon!


----------



## Rowan

stan_der_man said:


> I'm glad you are beginning to find some answers Rowan... My good thoughts and prayers to you that you find out what is wrong and start the healing process soon!




Thank you hon


----------



## Your Plump Princess

I can't stop developing Crushes on Men I talk to online, and it's killing me. :/

I've done the "online relationship" thing as a younger teen, and so now at almost 20 it just seems like such an..immature thing. And I'm actually -Worried- that my crushing-habit will turn into something one day.

It's just... a continuous heartbreak, all the freaking time.


----------



## Weirdo890

Your Plump Princess said:


> I can't stop developing Crushes on Men I talk to online.
> 
> I've been in online relationships as a younger teen. And I'm so burnt I just can't do them, I'm actually petrified that my crushing-habit will turn into something one day.
> 
> It's just... a continuous heartbreak, all the freaking time.



I'm sorry to hear that. I hope you can find someone and not go through that.


----------



## cherylharrell

Prayers said for everyone on here and the one whose in the hospital. Hope you get better soon...


----------



## izzy

the earthquake in haiti


----------



## rg770Ibanez

Your Plump Princess said:


> I can't stop developing Crushes on Men I talk to online, and it's killing me. :/
> 
> I've done the "online relationship" thing as a younger teen, and so now at almost 20 it just seems like such an..immature thing. And I'm actually -Worried- that my crushing-habit will turn into something one day.
> 
> It's just... a continuous heartbreak, all the freaking time.



I would advise that the next time you do this online dating thing you should most definitely avoid dating or even being interested in someone that is extremely far away from you. After that you've established that being with this person is actually a reality you should then proceed to confront them with the issue that you two most definitely need to start hanging out in person. You really can't rely on making a promising relationship out of "finding out who someone is" online. Because you really don't know a person for who they are just from knowing them online. Yeah you might know things about them, but you don't know them personally. Like the way they act and how they will react to certain things and whatnot. A few years ago I got to know a girl online that lived very close to me. And after getting to know her online I started to develop strong feelings for her. So the time came when I was like hey we need to hang out and start getting to know each other better and we did. But as soon as I started to actually hang out with this girl I absolutely hated her personality, despite how physically attracted I was to her. She was completely different from what I thought she would be. She was extremely immature and way too shy, even after like four months of hanging out like everyday. She also lied about a crap ton of stuff that were important things to me. Like for instance she claimed she believed in God and after I started hanging out with her her friends told me she was an atheist. Needless to say the whole situation was a complete let down. All I'm saying is you're taking a big risk by giving your heart away to some "randy" online. The only way to truly get to know someone and fall in love with them is doing it in real life. 
And also, what do you mean you're worried it will turn into something?


----------



## archivaltype

izzy said:


> the earthquake in haiti



Me too.  
I live under a rock, so I just heard about it. I'm donating some in the morning.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

I was so tired, I really don't remember what exactly I meant.

But I Get what your saying, it's just..awfully hard for me to keep myself from forming these self-destructive, emotional crushes.


----------



## rg770Ibanez

Yikes, well all I can tell you is learn how to avoid it at all costs. Internet relationships are pretty much always guaranteed to end. The constant heart break is going to make you build up emotional walls eventually. And they will make things worse in the long run. You won't be able to completely open yourself up to someone once it really matters because you will always have that fear of being let down or abandoned. But you would have based those fears off of irrelevant situations. Not to say that the situation was irrelevant to you, but that it can't be applied to the real life relationship when the time comes. Ehh sorry I'm blabbering, all I'm trying to say is when you do have an actual face to face relationship you will experience something way better and won't have the same negative results as the internet ones. Because internet couples almost never work out. Anyways my best advice would def be to stay away from the internet stuff and to exclusively date IRL


----------



## steely

My job fell through and I am now truly jobless.


----------



## the_captain

steely said:


> My job fell through and I am now truly jobless.



(((((steely))))) I'm so sorry. Keep your chin up! Maybe that job just wasn't meant to be, but you'll find the right one.


----------



## steely

the_captain said:


> (((((steely))))) I'm so sorry. Keep your chin up! Maybe that job just wasn't meant to be, but you'll find the right one.



Thank you, Captain. I feel much better now.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

steely said:


> My job fell through and I am now truly jobless.



Oh steely!!! I'm so sorry to hear that 
(((((((((((((Hugs)))))))))))))))


----------



## steely

MizzSnakeBite said:


> Oh steely!!! I'm so sorry to hear that
> (((((((((((((Hugs)))))))))))))))



Thanks, Mizz. It's going to be ok, I'm hoping.


----------



## Lovelyone

The earthquake in Haiti.


----------



## sirGordy

The tragic events in Haiti, of course. Steely, praying you will find another job soon. Hang in there, something good will come to you soon.


----------



## mel

Haiti..............


----------



## Jay West Coast

Just like you guys, I'm pretty torn up about what's happening in Haiti.


----------



## KuroBara

After reading the earlier responses, I feel selfish and silly for writing this, but it brought me to tears, so that counts as sad, right: I turned 30 yesterday, and except for a few FaceBook "friends," and my immediate family, no one remembered. I honestly appreciated the FB wishes, but I haven't known those people since high school and/or college, at the earliest. I didn't send them birthday cards when I could afford it and knew their physical address, and e-cards when I did not. But I'm always the active person in my friendships. I'm the one who sends the Christmas wishes, cards and texts, the one sending the update e-mails, the one who remembers their favorite colors. I'm considering pruning my friends, and that makes me the saddest of all.


----------



## indy500tchr

I am a little sad because I found out through Facebook that my high school crush is now engaged....and to a BBW! Albeit much smaller than me but she is still a bbw. 

I wouldn't be sad at all but a few months ago he was the one that friended me and started talking to me on FB which brought back all those teenage crush feelings. I didn't even know he was dating. There wasn't any indication of that on his page or when we talked. And to think I might have had a chance to find somebody to date that I didn't meet on-line.


----------



## Green Eyed Fairy

KuroBara said:


> After reading the earlier responses, I feel selfish and silly for writing this, but it brought me to tears, so that counts as sad, right: I turned 30 yesterday, and except for a few FaceBook "friends," and my immediate family, no one remembered. I honestly appreciated the FB wishes, but I haven't known those people since high school and/or college, at the earliest. I didn't send them birthday cards when I could afford it and knew their physical address, and e-cards when I did not. But I'm always the active person in my friendships. I'm the one who sends the Christmas wishes, cards and texts, the one sending the update e-mails, the one who remembers their favorite colors. I'm considering pruning my friends, and that makes me the saddest of all.



Cleaning out your closet is a good thing in the end.....because it makes room for better stuff


----------



## AuntHen

Yes, Haiti... I saw some of the most heart wrenching photos

Don't forget donations.. I know here locally there is The Red Cross (of course), Walgreens, Publix etc..all accepting them!


----------



## Jasminium

I don't get down too often. Maybe it's just this dreary weather, but this weekend I've been having my own private pity party over my (lack of a) love life.


----------



## Tania

One of my dad's oldest friends (junior high, growin' up in the Mission District of San Francisco) has cancer. He has a forty percent chance of survival. He is an awesome, fun, excellent person and I will fucking lose my shit when he passes away. :'(


----------



## Crystal

Tania said:


> One of my dad's oldest friends (junior high, growin' up in the Mission District of San Francisco) has cancer. He has a forty percent chance of survival. He is an awesome, fun, excellent person and I will fucking lose my shit when he passes away. :'(



Oh Tania, I'm so sorry. Cancer is a horrible, evil thing and it touches so many people's lives. *hugs*


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Tania said:


> One of my dad's oldest friends (junior high, growin' up in the Mission District of San Francisco) has cancer. He has a forty percent chance of survival. He is an awesome, fun, excellent person and I will fucking lose my shit when he passes away. :'(



I'm so sorry K . If you need to talk, vent, cry, anything, I'll be here for ya.
(((HUGS)))


----------



## Surlysomething

Tania said:


> One of my dad's oldest friends (junior high, growin' up in the Mission District of San Francisco) has cancer. He has a forty percent chance of survival. He is an awesome, fun, excellent person and I will fucking lose my shit when he passes away. :'(



I'm so sorry to hear this. Cancer is...wow. I have no words to describe my hatred.

They have made amazing advances with treatment though so let's all keep our best thoughts with your friend.

-hug-


----------



## Tania

Thanks you guys. :*

It depresses the crap out of me. I never got to know my paternal grandmother because cancer took her away the year before I was born. I don't want my daddy to lose another loved one to the disease. :'(


----------



## snuggletiger

Lost my best buddy to it last October.


----------



## 1300 Class

Been in a terrible funk lately. Even though I have been getting steady work at the University Library, its rather unfortunately at a hospital (its for the medical trainees, nurses, doctors and stuff) and its so depressing walking in everyday. Past all the old boys having a ciggie outside (with their cardio monitors and drips in tow), past the out patient waiting halls (patients in gowns with their families in tow) the patients out for a stroll from the wards. Its really not a nice place to be in my opinion, and I've been in hospital myself to know what its like from that side of the fence to. 

I know it sounds bad, but its just me, just me. In this deep blue funk where nothing seems to shift. 

Part of the reason why I think I'm like this is that my plans last year didn't really come together and that I've lost a lot of friends moving away (like my best mate moving down to Canberra for work last year and only managing to see each other a few times) and I'm still adjusting to working in an office every day. Where as before it was always doing the leg work (such as the shelving) but theres alot less of that and more prep and admin that I have to do. 

Same with working with Queensland Rail, doing the passenger counts in the mornings and afternoons. Out there riding the trains and counting people, always something different, something happening, watching the world go by and counting it. And getting paid for it!:happy: I liked that work but its only seasonly and casual. 

Anyway, back to the library, I haven't really made any friends in the library because we share nothing in common. I'm just 23 and still sorta fresh faced and finding my way/place in the world. They are all middle aged women. Don't get me wrong, they're nice enough and all that, but I just can't connect with any of them. All the places I've worked before there has always been at least someone that I could relate and really get chatting to (like one of the guys where I worked last year, we got on great and I got on well with two of the girls from the other branch).

With all the terrible shit going on the world at the moment, this sounds so bloody pathetically petty and small, but it does mean something.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Australian Lord said:


> With all the terrible shit going on the world at the moment, this sounds so bloody pathetically petty and small, but it does mean something.



Everyone has feelings and hardships (some have more hardships than others, like the people of Haiti right now), but just because one isn't in a life or death situation doesn't mean life's all peachy for them. Life sometimes just sucks, and we all have a right to acknowledge that we're feeling bad about things and ask for support or simply get it off our chests. It's not good to hold it all in.

I hope things start turning up for you.

Mizz


----------



## Weeze

$570 for textbooks. 



*$570*


----------



## Inhibited

I had to put my dog of 14 years to sleep last night :really sad:


----------



## littlefairywren

Inhibited said:


> I had to put my dog of 14 years to sleep last night :really sad:



Oh sweetheart, I am so sorry you had to do that. It is such a hard thing to do, and I know what you are going through. I am sure you doggie is in a good place right now (((HUGS)))


----------



## mel

Inhibited said:


> I had to put my dog of 14 years to sleep last night :really sad:



awww I am so sorry to hear that (((((((((((((BIG HUG))))))))))))))))))


----------



## Paquito

krismiss said:


> $570 for textbooks.
> 
> 
> 
> *$570*



College is evil. Stupid "school custom editions" that have maybe one new paragraph end up costing afgfgnfjgkh times more than the normal one. 

I WANT MY BANK ACCOUNT BACK


----------



## StaySafeTonight

Having my fiance cheat on me with a foreign exchange student for the entire semester he was in America. Which is tragic because the guy could barely speak English and looked like Andre the Giant.

But there are two things that made me happy:
1.) It happened before we married so no divorce/ kids drama.
2.) My friends joke of "So easy, a caveman can do her"

:happy:


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Inhibited said:


> I had to put my dog of 14 years to sleep last night :really sad:



(((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))) I'm so sorry 
:kiss2:,
Mizz


----------



## the_captain

My work computer got a bad virus last week. I thought the IT guy fixed it, but it's still acting squirrely. Every so often it shuts itself down. ARRRRGH!!!


----------



## the_captain

Inhibited said:


> I had to put my dog of 14 years to sleep last night :really sad:



Been there, done that. It's very heartbreaking...my condolances, Inhibited. ((((((hugs)))))


----------



## OneWickedAngel

Article found online: Woman Kills Boyfriend By Sitting on Him, but Mia Landingham Isn't Going to Jail

It's not the article itself that bugs me. The reporter merely states the absolute facts and nothing else. What's irking the crap out of me are the amazingly spiteful, fat-hating comments spewed afterward.


----------



## Inhibited

> littlefairywren said:
> 
> 
> 
> Oh sweetheart, I am so sorry you had to do that. It is such a hard thing to do, and I know what you are going through. I am sure you doggie is in a good place right now (((HUGS)))
Click to expand...


Thanks heaps, he is in a good place hopefully he will be able to see again



> mel said:
> 
> 
> 
> awww I am so sorry to hear that (((((((((((((BIG HUG))))))))))))))))))
Click to expand...


Thanks you Mel



> MizzSnakeBite said:
> 
> 
> 
> (((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))) I'm so sorry
> :kiss2:,
> Mizz
Click to expand...


Thanks you Mizz



> the_captain said:
> 
> 
> 
> Been there, done that. It's very heartbreaking...my condolances, Inhibited. ((((((hugs)))))
Click to expand...


Thank you Captain


And thanks heaps too SamanthaNY, Leesa and Rainyday...


----------



## Mystic Rain

I had found the perfect house to buy for my first house, but it was stolen away from me. The greedy little shits at the bank took a higher offer and they waited a week to say. It was the only house I liked in a good neighborhood and now there's nothing. 

I will never find another one so perfect in less than 90 days.


----------



## mel

I just saw a commercial about a program on Dog Fighting..that really burns me up!!! So... sad and pissed!


----------



## steely

Inhibited said:


> I had to put my dog of 14 years to sleep last night :really sad:



I'm so sorry, I know just how hard that is to have to do.


----------



## Proner

Went to the doctor today because I feel pains in my left thigh and I learned that I have my left leg muscle torn and I have the soccer's Regional Cup which start this week blaaah....


----------



## mossystate

Right now...absolutely nothing. I am enjoying my heart.

Wait....it does make me sad that I cannot get my DVD player to work, and I cannot watch my Dexter. Watching on my computer.......eh........not the same.


----------



## Gingembre

Proner said:


> Went to the doctor today because I feel pains in my left thigh and I learned that I have my left leg muscle torn and I have the soccer's Regional Cup which start this week blaaah....




Ohhhh NO! Sorry to read this (((hugs))) x


----------



## kittencat

i am sorry for your loss *big hugs and comfort food*


----------



## kittencat

i actually for the first time in a long time am feeling lonely I dislike it.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Proner said:


> Went to the doctor today because I feel pains in my left thigh and I learned that I have my left leg muscle torn and I have the soccer's Regional Cup which start this week blaaah....



Oh that's too bad.  

Maybe they can give you some cortisone injections to help with the inflammation and pain, then wrap it up before the game? Try to give your leg as much rest as possible. I hope it heals quickly and you are somehow able to play.
Hugs,
Mizz Not a Doctor


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

I'm sad/mad I'm mom's not acting like an adult and being responsible. I'm sad/mad she turns to me and _always_ wants me to keep her in check. She's in her 50s, she should know by now how to keep herself in check.


----------



## Famouslastwords

1) I got scathing peer reviews of my essay which makes me not want to participate in the second peer review at all. I have to decide by 4 hours from now before I got to bed because I have the class tomorrow. What really pisses me off is my piece was really well written compared to the illiterate pieces of crap I read, and I was generally nice.

2) This boy at school said hi to me so I thought he wanted to be my friend, then he started to ignore me. So I guess he doesn't want to be my friend. I think it's because of my weight.


----------



## Proner

Gingembre said:


> Ohhhh NO! Sorry to read this (((hugs))) x



Thanks I have a gel and ice to put on my leg and that helps a lot! For the cup I'm sad of course but if healing goes well I will be able to play few games before the end of the season so it's not that bad.
The only thing makes me really sad is I can't do anymore my long walk in parks or in the city as I have to don't walk for to long to makes my leg rest 
Anyway thanks again  (hugs back)



MizzSnakeBite said:


> Oh that's too bad.
> 
> Maybe they can give you some cortisone injections to help with the inflammation and pain, then wrap it up before the game? Try to give your leg as much rest as possible. I hope it heals quickly and you are somehow able to play.
> Hugs,
> Mizz Not a Doctor



In fact the doctor decide to makes my leg rest because I had many injuries on it and playing now even with cortisone could make the situation get worse.
Thanks you very much 
One Leg Proner


----------



## Famouslastwords

Proner said:


> Thanks I have a gel and ice to put on my leg and that helps a lot! For the cup I'm sad of course but if healing goes well I will be able to play few games before the end of the season so it's not that bad.
> The only thing makes me really sad is I can't do anymore my long walk in parks or in the city as I have to don't walk for to long to makes my leg rest
> Anyway thanks again  (hugs back)
> 
> 
> 
> In fact the doctor decide to makes my leg rest because I had many injuries on it and playing now even with cortisone could make the situation get worse.
> Thanks you very much
> One Leg Proner




Even with one bad leg you still have two good legs to stand on *wink wink*


----------



## Proner

Famouslastwords said:


> Even with one bad leg you still have two good legs to stand on *wink wink*



Oh No! You ruined all my plan to get hugs, what I could do now if everyone see I could stand tall even with one bad leg


----------



## Gingembre

I don't think "standing tall" is going to discourage anyone from hugging you, Romain!  






I'm sorry i'm sorry, i've fallen in the gutter! *shame*


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Gingembre said:


> I don't think "standing tall" is going to discourage anyone from hugging you, Romain!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I'm sorry i'm sorry, i've fallen in the gutter! *shame*



Yeah, we'll just hug you a bit tighter


----------



## Famouslastwords

Proner said:


> Oh No! You ruined all my plan to get hugs, what I could do now if everyone see I could stand tall even with one bad leg




I'd hug you still. It's pretty impressive, what with a *wink wink* third leg and whatnot.


----------



## Proner

Famouslastwords said:


> I'd hug you still. It's pretty impressive, what with a *wink wink* third leg and whatnot.



Damn, I really have to be sure to understand everything in a post before answer to it, I didn't understood the third leg thing :doh:
Ok so new resolution stop posting lol


----------



## Famouslastwords

Proner said:


> Damn, I really have to be sure to understand everything in a post before answer to it, I didn't understood the third leg thing :doh:
> Ok so new resolution stop posting lol




Teehee, you're not mad at me are you? For tricking you? You know we still <3 you come here I'll give you a fat girl hug *hug*


----------



## Proner

Famouslastwords said:


> Teehee, you're not mad at me are you? For tricking you? You know we still <3 you come here I'll give you a fat girl hug *hug*



I'm not until I saw your post in the "What are you happy about today" thread! No I'm kidding I'm not mad at you, I feel more dumb.... anyway I know I have to be more careful when I post now


----------



## Famouslastwords

Proner said:


> I'm not until I saw your post in the "What are you happy about today" thread! No I'm kidding I'm not mad at you, I feel more dumb.... anyway I know I have to be more careful when I post now



But om the "what are you happy about" thread we were discussing your invitation to the three-for-one deal! LFW, Mizz, and FLW for one FA


----------



## Proner

Famouslastwords said:


> But om the "what are you happy about" thread we were discussing your invitation to the three-for-one deal! LFW, Mizz, and FLW for one FA



I know and I'm flattered it's just the "third leg" quote who makes me said "What?" and raised my eyebrows so high they won't come down now


----------



## TheNowhereMan

The sheer state of the United States both socially and politically is what is making me sad right now.

Senators vote on increasing their own pay checks every year and the minimum wage barely budges.

Obvious corruption through lobbying.

Very simple issues such as National Health Care being shot down because our own well being is a for profit industry. In which the CEO who does very little, in the worst case, make ridiculously more then their lowest paid employee who most likely scrubs and sweeps all day.

There sheer ignorance to the real issues because of Pop Idol Politicians like Sarah Palin and Mary Cheney who distract the media who are spoon fed what to say, understanding nothing, in an attempt to inform the masses.

That is what is making me sad.


----------



## ThatFatGirl

Not so much sad as worried, anxious, slightly queasy... My older brother has a job performance review in ten minutes that he is worried about because a couple people who've worked in his office twice as long as him were let go earlier in the week. A job review at 3:30 pm on a Friday just can't be good news... I'm hoping it's only a warning or something. 

His wife was laid off a few months ago from her job and has yet to find anything, so this would be especially awful for them.

Hopefully I'll have some good news to report here later.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

ThatFatGirl said:


> Not so much sad as worried, anxious, slightly queasy... My older brother has a job performance review in ten minutes that he is worried about because a couple people who've worked in his office twice as long as him were let go earlier in the week. A job review at 3:30 pm on a Friday just can't be good news... I'm hoping it's only a warning or something.
> 
> His wife was laid off a few months ago from her job and has yet to find anything, so this would be especially awful for them.
> 
> Hopefully I'll have some good news to report here later.



Oh I hope everything turns out well!


----------



## ThatFatGirl

Thank GOD everything is OK. He is actually being given more work (with no extra pay) as some company they contract with is no longer going to be working with them. I think there may actually be some job security in that, hopefully if he can wing it. 

Thank you for the good thoughts/positive vibes. My entire family was sweating this one out. All is well for now.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

ThatFatGirl said:


> Thank GOD everything is OK. He is actually being given more work (with no extra pay) as some company they contract with is no longer going to be working with them. I think there may actually be some job security in that, hopefully if he can wing it.
> 
> Thank you for the good thoughts/positive vibes. My entire family was sweating this one out. All is well for now.



Oh GOOD!!! 

Scary times; people losing jobs and not being able to find a new one.


----------



## HottiMegan

ThatFatGirl said:


> Thank GOD everything is OK. He is actually being given more work (with no extra pay) as some company they contract with is no longer going to be working with them. I think there may actually be some job security in that, hopefully if he can wing it.
> 
> Thank you for the good thoughts/positive vibes. My entire family was sweating this one out. All is well for now.



Thats good news. I'm glad he has security. It sure is a scary time job wise for everyone!


----------



## HottiMegan

My sadness has no specific cause other than that deep shadow over my life called depression. I'm having a down day today. Just waiting for the ups to happen again.


----------



## Fallenangel2904

Just number crunching and realizing I am way broker then I thought at this current time. Full time student+no job=savings out the window. Ughh I hate financial stress! :doh:


----------



## mimosa

*I was born and raised in a bordertown and my mother was born in a city close by but over the border of Mexico. There are a lot of awful things happening there right now. If I go visit, I will not be able to go over into the Mexican side. Too dangerous at the moment. That makes me very sad. I won't be able to see my grandmother. I miss her so much. http://uk.reuters.com/article/idUKTRE60U1CQ20100131*


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

HottiMegan said:


> My sadness has no specific cause other than that deep shadow over my life called depression. I'm having a down day today. Just waiting for the ups to happen again.





Fallenangel2904 said:


> Just number crunching and realizing I am way broker then I thought at this current time. Full time student+no job=savings out the window. Ughh I hate financial stress! :doh:



Hugs to both of you!


----------



## 99Haints

Something...unimaginably horrible has happened to an old friend of mine. I've been nauseous and out of my head about it for the past day and a half. It's one of those things you just can't wrap your head around or accept, or settle with. Actually it's not "one of those things" at all. I wish right now would be over.


----------



## Ruffie

We (at the youth centre I run) lost another youth to suicide this weekend. So hard to bear!!


----------



## Rowan

I still havent gotten any calls for the dozens of applications I've put in for jobs 
Im finding that all i want to do is sleep, which I know is obviously me falling into a deeper and deeper depression, but i dont know how to pull myself out of it.


----------



## Surlysomething

Ruffie said:


> We (at the youth centre I run) lost another youth to suicide this weekend. So hard to bear!!



 It's so sad to hear that. That a child sees that suicide is the only way out is very heartbreaking.

-hug-


----------



## gow

SOMEBODY owes me Money.


----------



## gow

Surlysomething said:


> It's so sad to hear that. That a child sees that suicide is the only way out is very heartbreaking.
> 
> -hug-



... You are talking to a suicide Survivor.

That someone can NOT believe in God after that... Only a Liberal would make that abomination, that God can save you from a Gunshot wound.

I am sorry to hear that he did not survive his/her attempt. i was almost that person.. miraculous Recovery for me.

This gives me Pause.


----------



## gow

Rowan said:


> I still havent gotten any calls for the dozens of applications I've put in for jobs
> Im finding that all i want to do is sleep, which I know is obviously me falling into a deeper and deeper depression, but i dont know how to pull myself out of it.



I feel for you. This is why i am -Soo Happy- that -I- get to detrmine MY Success at this Job i have!

It will come.. Keep Looking, because Obama aint doing Shit but running his Mouth, raising taxes, lying, and having his own party Deset him. if it wasnt for REAL Americans like You looking for work, and Me thanking JESUS that i HAVE one, and Must Must MUST Keep it... it would be Funny. 

PS: I got mine by Looking, too. Nobody GAVE it to me. And nobody certainly CREATD it, as CNN woul dhave yo ubelieve.. watch FOX for Real news.


----------



## mel

my current life....debbie downer is what i am changing my name to


----------



## littlefairywren

I am sad because my estranged sister has decided to get in touch with our father (whom I have not seen in 30 yrs). She has gone through my shitty ex to get info to do so....and now I am struggling with horrible memories I thought were put to rest. No good can come of this


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

littlefairywren said:


> I am sad because my estranged sister has decided to get in touch with our father (whom I have not seen in 30 yrs). She has gone through my shitty ex to get info to do so....and now I am struggling with horrible memories I thought were put to rest. No good can come of this



((((Hugs to my wee birdie))))) 

I totally understand the horrible memories....


----------



## Inhibited

littlefairywren said:


> I am sad because my estranged sister has decided to get in touch with our father (whom I have not seen in 30 yrs). She has gone through my shitty ex to get info to do so....and now I am struggling with horrible memories I thought were put to rest. No good can come of this




I can't say that i really understand, but am sorry your sad and i hope it works out and gets better for you.....


----------



## littlefairywren

MizzSnakeBite said:


> ((((Hugs to my wee birdie)))))
> 
> I totally understand the horrible memories....



Oh Mizz, I knew if anyone would understand it would be you my sweet 



Inhibited said:


> I can't say that i really understand, but am sorry your sad and i hope it works out and gets better for you.....



Thanks Lisa 


Hugs to the both of you!


----------



## Proner

I had an appointment with my lead and he said that I do great job, I'm a good librarian BUT he can't renew my contract so I have to leave the library in May...blaah


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Proner said:


> I had an appointment with my lead and he said that I do great job, I'm a good librarian BUT he can't renew my contract so I have to leave the library in May...blaah



Boo!!!!  I hope you're able to find a new job quickly!!


----------



## Fat.n.sassy

I live in a small town and work at an elementary school in the adjoining small town. One of the teachers in our school lost her husband Monday night in a logging accident. This teacher used to be the principal of the school and her husband was on the select board, both of them well known in town, both older.

It's just so sad. She called the rescue squad when he didn't come out of the woods as it was getting dark. All of these folks around her know each other and many are related, so it was hard on everyone when they found him..about a mile into the woods. He was pushing down a tree with his bulldozer and a nearby tree came down on him. His bulldozer didn't have a cage. So....that's what is making me sad right now.


----------



## littlefairywren

Fat.n.sassy said:


> I live in a small town and work at an elementary school in the adjoining small town. One of the teachers in our school lost her husband Monday night in a logging accident. This teacher used to be the principal of the school and her husband was on the select board, both of them well known in town, both older.
> 
> It's just so sad. She called the rescue squad when he didn't come out of the woods as it was getting dark. All of these folks around her know each other and many are related, so it was hard on everyone when they found him..about a mile into the woods. He was pushing down a tree with his bulldozer and a nearby tree came down on him. His bulldozer didn't have a cage. So....that's what is making me sad right now.



My prayers, and condolences for her and their families


----------



## Shala

I'm sad that we haven't had much luck getting pregnant....we have been trying for a while now. I worry because I am 37 now and I think my ship is about to sail on this one. I very much would like to have a child.


----------



## shadowmaker87

shala ... im sorry tht u cant have ne kids! we r too childless which im kinda sad but i kno tht everything comes with a reason, n GOD only knows!!! Also what is making me sad is im in the military n i just wanna get my 10 months done so i can have my 20 yrs in n don't have to deal with the B/S nemore frm them but i kno tht ; "good things comes to people who wait" take care shala n i hope everything will work 4 u !!!


----------



## Shala

Thanks shadowmaker! If it's meant to be, it will be.


----------



## Oldtimer76

Yesterday I heard that a man I know quite well, has been taken to the hospital because of extremely pains in his back and some failure in his leg. They detected cancer in his spinal marrow and it is in a far stage I so do hope he will get better, but I am so afraid he won't survive He is only 72yo or so... everybody loves him! He's such a wonderful person. Makes me so sad today...


----------



## bigsexy920

Life, in general.


----------



## littlefairywren

I am having a major sooky la la moment. I am so tired of being alone, tired of sleeping alone, tired of eating alone, tired of being the single person in a group, tired of not having someone to touch...tired of hearing myself moan 

Blah, blah, blah!!


----------



## cherylharrell

A friend of mine who lives out of town and I don't get to see very often is here and staying at the same motel as me but he won't even visit with me. The only reason I got to say hi to him yesterday for a minute was I ran into him checking in. And yet he went off and visited with another friend. Sigh. I need to talk to him. My darling hubby passed in March & I am so hurting and just needed to talk to this guy. I know he's hurt over Mike passing but don't let it stop you from saying Hi to me. You want not feel like hanging out with folks but don't avoid your friends. Sad...


----------



## cinnamitch

Today is my mothers birthday. She was murdered in 2006. We had a falling out and had not spoken in years. We never found our way back to each other. So this will not be a happy day for me.


----------



## Shosh

cinnamitch said:


> Today is my mothers birthday. She was murdered in 2006. We had a falling out and had not spoken in years. We never found our way back to each other. So this will not be a happy day for me.



Gosh I am sorry to hear that. How traumatic it must have been for you. I know that there are support groups for family of homicide victims. Maybe that would help.

I believe our loved ones are always near even in the spirit world.

Maybe you could write a letter to your mother telling her everything you wanted to say, and then read it out loud.

I was estranged from my mother from when I was 17 until I was 39. Twenty two years.
I will be 40 in May.


----------



## littlefairywren

cinnamitch said:


> Today is my mothers birthday. She was murdered in 2006. We had a falling out and had not spoken in years. We never found our way back to each other. So this will not be a happy day for me.



I know we don't know each other cinnamitch, but I hope you don't mind me giving you a ((((hug))))


----------



## Linda

Distance and silence.
I really don't like either sometimes.


----------



## HottiMegan

I am nothing. I am unworthy.


----------



## littlefairywren

HottiMegan said:


> I am nothing. I am unworthy.



Megan, I don't know you. But I can guarantee you are worthy, and you are most definitely something in this world to your family and your friends!!

(((HUGS)))


----------



## CleverBomb

littlefairywren said:


> Megan, I don't know you. But I can guarantee you are worthy, and you are most definitely something in this world to your family and your friends!!
> 
> (((HUGS)))


She's right, you know.

-Rusty


----------



## NYCGabriel

being less than part employed
being physically and emotionally alone


----------



## mel

cinnamitch said:


> Today is my mothers birthday. She was murdered in 2006. We had a falling out and had not spoken in years. We never found our way back to each other. So this will not be a happy day for me.



I hope you are able to find a little peace today ..i'm so sorry you have to go through this ((hugs))


----------



## NYCGabriel

Linda said:


> Distance and silence.
> I really don't like either sometimes.



I hear that


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

HottiMegan said:


> I am nothing. I am unworthy.



You certainly are something and we would miss you very much if you weren't around!

Hugs to you! :wubu:


----------



## Shosh

HottiMegan said:


> I am nothing. I am unworthy.



You are a wonderful loving mother and wife, and a friend to many here.

I really like your kind and calm ways during the time I have known you through Dims.

xo


----------



## hillking12

was released frm my job


----------



## Linda

hillking12 said:


> was released frm my job



Damn. I'm sorry.


----------



## Leonard

cherylharrell said:


> A friend of mine who lives out of town and I don't get to see very often is here and staying at the same motel as me but he won't even visit with me. The only reason I got to say hi to him yesterday for a minute was I ran into him checking in. And yet he went off and visited with another friend. Sigh. I need to talk to him. My darling hubby passed in March & I am so hurting and just needed to talk to this guy. I know he's hurt over Mike passing but don't let it stop you from saying Hi to me. You want not feel like hanging out with folks but don't avoid your friends. Sad...



I'm so sorry, cherylharrell. I hope your friend decides to reach out to you. He may want to, but is afraid you'd prefer to be alone and doesn't wish to disturb you. Maybe you could take the first step?


----------



## firefly

A young man, who had been my pupil a few years ago, committed suicide, together with two friends. All three only 20 years old.

Wasted lifes...


----------



## Paquito

The earthquake in Chile. And the tsunami's headed toward the islands in the direction of California. Thankfully Hawaii was spared, but I fear for the missing Chileans and the islands who are on the pathway of the tsunamis.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

hillking12 said:


> was released frm my job



I'm so sorry to hear that . It seems like more and more business are closing down and it's become so hard to find a decent job. 

Good luck with your job search!



firefly said:


> A young man, who had been my pupil a few years ago, committed suicide, together with two friends. All three only 20 years old.
> 
> Wasted lifes...



I'm so sorry to hear this too.  You must be a wonderful teacher to still care about their students, present and past. Many are so burned out that they don't care anymore.



free2beme04 said:


> The earthquake in Chile. And the tsunami's headed toward the islands in the direction of California. Thankfully Hawaii was spared, but I fear for the missing Chileans and the islands who are on the pathway of the tsunamis.



So sad..........it never seems to stop.


----------



## Shosh

I feel so sad for Marie Osmond. Her 18 year old son Michael committed suicide on friday evening.


----------



## qwertyman173

I just feel really down 
Don't know why. Been feeling down for a while.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

The fact that I Have to go back to my moms tomorrow.. ;/


----------



## Ruffie

I heard from my mother that they had my Aunt's(dads sisters) 90th birthday party and did not invite my mother or I to the event on Thursday night. They did the same with my cousins daughters wedding this summer. My mom found out this through a friend of hers that goes to the Red hats with the cousin that was having the event. She couldn't attend the meeting cause she had to prepare for this. I am angry about this cause most of my and my husband's family have not much to do with us. But I am sad cause I cannot think of any reason why we are being treated this way over and over.


----------



## Ruffie

I just after posting went back and re read through some of the past couple of pages of tis thread. And I wanted to offer a hug and positive thoughts to all of you!


----------



## Bearsy

I told my dad about my desire/plan to ride my bike across the country with a friend of mine and he laughed in my face.
Absolutely floored me. I've been depressed all day.


----------



## Gingembre

Bearsy said:


> I told my dad about my desire/plan to ride my bike across the country with a friend of mine and he laughed in my face.
> Absolutely floored me. I've been depressed all day.



I hate when parents do that...my mum does it to me. Don't let 'em spoil your dreams - prove him wrong and get a-biking 

((hugs)) because you're feeling down and not at all because you look really cute in your avatar


----------



## theladypoet

I'm sad because reality just bitch-slapped me in the face today. I'm so broke right now the only thing I could afford at McDonalds is the coffee.... and only because it's free.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Bearsy said:


> I told my dad about my desire/plan to ride my bike across the country with a friend of mine and he laughed in my face.
> Absolutely floored me. I've been depressed all day.



Prove him wrong then laugh in his face!!!! 

Hugs to you!


----------



## Rowan

I don't know how my mother can sit in the next room talking to my grandmother about how worthless and pathetic I am. Heck...even the other day she told a friend of hers on the phone she wished kids were like animals and you had the option to euthanize them when you wanted. I guess her kicking me out is a blessing in disguise. So i'll have all my stuff out by Monday and I'll be staying elsewhere. It just really hurts to have her in there talking about me like that when she knows I can hear it. It's almost like she delights in all the bad things she says about me to her own mother


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Rowan said:


> I don't know how my mother can sit in the next room talking to my grandmother about how worthless and pathetic I am. Heck...even the other day she told a friend of hers on the phone she wished kids were like animals and you had the option to euthanize them when you wanted. I guess her kicking me out is a blessing in disguise. So i'll have all my stuff out by Monday and I'll be staying elsewhere. It just really hurts to have her in there talking about me like that when she knows I can hear it. It's almost like she delights in all the bad things she says about me to her own mother



(((HUGS)))

I think our mothers are related.


----------



## littlefairywren

Rowan said:


> I don't know how my mother can sit in the next room talking to my grandmother about how worthless and pathetic I am. Heck...even the other day she told a friend of hers on the phone she wished kids were like animals and you had the option to euthanize them when you wanted. I guess her kicking me out is a blessing in disguise. So i'll have all my stuff out by Monday and I'll be staying elsewhere. It just really hurts to have her in there talking about me like that when she knows I can hear it. It's almost like she delights in all the bad things she says about me to her own mother



OMG, I am so sorry you are going through that kind of heartache....((((Rowan))))


----------



## Rowan

littlefairywren said:


> OMG, I am so sorry you are going through that kind of heartache....((((Rowan))))



Thanks...even worse today I said that she was really burning some bridges with me and her response was nothing more than "good". I just dont understand how she can go from telling people how great it was to have me live here and stuff to now all of a sudden she cant stand the sight of me and just wants me gone and would be happy to never talk to me again just because I voiced my opinion that I didnt like that the guys she was dating were using her, which they totally were. 

I guess it just hurts to feel like a parent doesnt love you anymore


----------



## Your Plump Princess

Oh my gods Rowan, I'm SO Sorry! I can't believe a mother would that, that's awful! >;/ 

*Big Hug* I hope she'll come to her senses and realize what a horrible person she is being.


----------



## Rowan

Your Plump Princess said:


> Oh my gods Rowan, I'm SO Sorry! I can't believe a mother would that, that's awful! >;/
> 
> *Big Hug* I hope she'll come to her senses and realize what a horrible person she is being.



Thanks hon..I hope so too. It just sucks that she always said i was the only one of her kids who was always there and didnt only come around just because they wanted something. I guess this is how i get paid back. And today when I was moving stuff out, at the very end, the couple things i forgot she sent my brother over with them, one of them a christmas gift i gave her that early today she said i could take because "she never asked for it and never wanted it and good riddens to it". She even sent over a purse i forgot in the closet. It's like shes making sure to get rid of every scrap of memory that I was ever there and it hurts so bad. And what makes it worse is that I have to go over there and clean the bathroom top to bottom and vacuum the room and take some bathroom mats back she said i could have and changed her mind because she'd rather burn them than me have them (she said this herself).

I honestly think that she is having some form of mental illness that is hitting her in her older age (she just hit 50). Heck..she just started therapy and she's worse...way worse...than before she started!!


----------



## curvalicious

I'm sad it's my Spring Break and I have no plans as of yet.
I really just want to be lazy!

Also it sucks not having any money to do anything and the job market just sucks right now. I interviewed for a few jobs recently and didn't get any of them, but I shall keep on looking.


----------



## mossystate

Rowan, it's really good that you are getting out of Dodge. Therapy could be bringing all kinds of dark stuff to her surface. She might be beyond overwhelmed, if she is working through pain ( however that looks for her ). And, as you know, our past can dictate our present and our future. I don't think it is at all odd that she is lashing out at you even though you were the one always there. Sometimes those closest to us in whatever way, get the brunt of whatever is going on with us. And, as wacky as it seems since she has pushed you out, she might very well be feeling abandoned by your leaving. It is not OK that you are getting so much. Just try to remember that you don't deserve it and that somewhere inside her, she does love you. Doesn't mean you have to be there to feel the blows. I hope you create boundaries, and that she gets better.


----------



## Rowan

mossystate said:


> Rowan, it's really good that you are getting out of Dodge. Therapy could be bringing all kinds of dark stuff to her surface. She might be beyond overwhelmed, if she is working through pain ( however that looks for her ). And, as you know, our past can dictate our present and our future. I don't think it is at all odd that she is lashing out at you even though you were the one always there. Sometimes those closest to us in whatever way, get the brunt of whatever is going on with us. And, as wacky as it seems since she has pushed you out, she might very well be feeling abandoned by your leaving. It is not OK that you are getting so much. Just try to remember that you don't deserve it and that somewhere inside her, she does love you. Doesn't mean you have to be there to feel the blows. I hope you create boundaries, and that she gets better.



Thanks Mossy...but I definitely plan on going and doing the cleaning when she is gone at work because I don't want to see her or hear her put me down any more than she has. And when she's ready to treat me better..then i'll be open to talking to her again, but she definitely crossed some lines and hurt me pretty deeply in a way she hasnt done in years.


----------



## Ruffie

Rowan I am so sorry that you have had to go though this. I know the pain cause I have dealt with situations in my own family that are like this. What I found helped me was to take a step back and look at the issues she has that might be causing her to act this way. Seeing those helps mentally put things into perspective although emotionally the wounds remain raw and painful. Also look at the people in your life that love you and why they do. When you are able to take stock of the things that others see in you as positive loving qualities you can start to rebuild the holes in your heart. I hope that you are able to take care of yourself through this process *giant hugs*
Ruth


----------



## Oldtimer76

Rowan said:


> I don't know how my mother can sit in the next room talking to my grandmother about how worthless and pathetic I am. Heck...even the other day she told a friend of hers on the phone she wished kids were like animals and you had the option to euthanize them when you wanted. I guess her kicking me out is a blessing in disguise. So i'll have all my stuff out by Monday and I'll be staying elsewhere. It just really hurts to have her in there talking about me like that when she knows I can hear it. It's almost like she delights in all the bad things she says about me to her own mother



((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Rowan)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Please take care, hun!
Hope you keep your head up. I'm just so sorry to read this

:kiss2::kiss2:


----------



## GTAFA

Rowan said:


> I don't know how my mother can sit in the next room talking to my grandmother about how worthless and pathetic I am. Heck...even the other day she told a friend of hers on the phone she wished kids were like animals and you had the option to euthanize them when you wanted. I guess her kicking me out is a blessing in disguise. So i'll have all my stuff out by Monday and I'll be staying elsewhere. It just really hurts to have her in there talking about me like that when she knows I can hear it. It's almost like she delights in all the bad things she says about me to her own mother



I see this sort of behaviour in my own family although in slightly different forms. 

When you say *it's almost like she delights in all the bad things she says about me*, there is a queer pleasure in abuse. I see it in my family, a kind of sadomasochistic thrill, from hurting the one you love. Does it help if i mention that this is still a symptom of LOVE? Some people feel bonded in the heat of arguments or even in physical fights. Yes it's weird, and I am sorry for the pain you've had to endure.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

My mom's making me sad right now, too, Rowan. I'm sorry you're going through this.


----------



## Fluffy51888

I don't know if any of you have ever heard of Formspring, but it's a website you can set up and people can ask you questions anonymously. Well, a while back someone asked me what the worst advice I'd ever recieved was, and I said when someone suggested (in a nice, "care about me" way) that I should consider weight loss surgery. Well, when I logged on today someone had said, "You should take that weight loss surgery advice. YIKES." I know it shouldn't bother me as much as it has, but I can't help it. :really sad: I'm a really tender-hearted person and very rarely cause people to say anything hateful towards me. I just don't get why some people are so mean.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Fluffy51888 said:


> I don't know if any of you have ever heard of Formspring, but it's a website you can set up and people can ask you questions anonymously. Well, a while back someone asked me what the worst advice I'd ever recieved was, and I said when someone suggested (in a nice, "care about me" way) that I should consider weight loss surgery. Well, when I logged on today someone had said, "You should take that weight loss surgery advice. YIKES." I know it shouldn't bother me as much as it has, but I can't help it. :really sad: I'm a really tender-hearted person and very rarely cause people to say anything hateful towards me. I just don't get why some people are so mean.



I think they feel safe saying those things since they 1) don't know you, 2) can't see face to face, 3) feel they can be nasty because they don't have any "fall out" from the comment(s).

You're beautiful just the way you are.


----------



## Fluffy51888

MizzSnakeBite said:


> I think they feel safe saying those things since they 1) don't know you, 2) can't see face to face, 3) feel they can be nasty because they don't have any "fall out" from the comment(s).
> 
> You're beautiful just the way you are.




Yea, I guess it's easy to be hateful to someone when they have no idea who you are. And thank you so much. I really needed to hear that.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Fluffy51888 said:


> Yea, I guess it's easy to be hateful to someone when they have no idea who you are. And thank you so much. I really needed to hear that.



You're welcome hon (I can say that! I'm from the South!!  ); plus it's true!


----------



## littlefairywren

Fluffy51888 said:


> I don't know if any of you have ever heard of Formspring, but it's a website you can set up and people can ask you questions anonymously. Well, a while back someone asked me what the worst advice I'd ever recieved was, and I said when someone suggested (in a nice, "care about me" way) that I should consider weight loss surgery. Well, when I logged on today someone had said, "You should take that weight loss surgery advice. YIKES." I know it shouldn't bother me as much as it has, but I can't help it. :really sad: I'm a really tender-hearted person and very rarely cause people to say anything hateful towards me. I just don't get why some people are so mean.



(((Hugs)))
Mizz is right....you are gorgeous and you have a beautiful heart :happy:
Don't you let the haters get you down!


----------



## Fluffy51888

MizzSnakeBite said:


> You're welcome hon (I can say that! I'm from the South!!  ); plus it's true!



 Thank God for Southern girls!


----------



## Fluffy51888

littlefairywren said:


> (((Hugs)))
> Mizz is right....you are gorgeous and you have a beautiful heart :happy:
> Don't you let the haters get you down!



Thank you so much love! It's so nice to know there are so many wonderful people here to give my spirits a lift when they need it! (And sorry I didn't multi-quote, I didn't see LFW's response when I responded to Mizz! )


----------



## rg770Ibanez

I had to pawn my guitar and my amp for rent. I'm pretty much heart broken.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

rg770Ibanez said:


> I had to pawn my guitar and my amp for rent. I'm pretty much heart broken.



I'm so sorry 
(((HUGS)))


----------



## littlefairywren

rg770Ibanez said:


> I had to pawn my guitar and my amp for rent. I'm pretty much heart broken.



Hugs to you


----------



## AuntHen

Fluffy51888 said:


> I don't know if any of you have ever heard of Formspring, but it's a website you can set up and people can ask you questions anonymously. Well, a while back someone asked me what the worst advice I'd ever recieved was, and I said when someone suggested (in a nice, "care about me" way) that I should consider weight loss surgery. Well, when I logged on today someone had said, "You should take that weight loss surgery advice. YIKES." I know it shouldn't bother me as much as it has, but I can't help it. :really sad: I'm a really tender-hearted person and very rarely cause people to say anything hateful towards me. I just don't get why some people are so mean.




oh my gosh... you are like the cutest thing EVER!!:wubu: And I know there are TONS of people who would back me up on that one! What they said was stupid! You need nothing! You are lovely


----------



## rg770Ibanez

thank you for the hugs 
its not that bad, ill get better gear next time around.


----------



## Fluffy51888

rg770Ibanez said:


> I had to pawn my guitar and my amp for rent. I'm pretty much heart broken.



That sucks.  I'm really sorry about that. 



fat9276 said:


> oh my gosh... you are like the cutest thing EVER!!:wubu: And I know there are TONS of people who would back me up on that one! What they said was stupid! You need nothing! You are lovely



Aw, thanks so much! You guys are being so wonderful about this. Y'all are doing an amazing job of making me forget about that mean comment.:happy:


----------



## rg770Ibanez

Tis all right Fluffy, thanks for the sympathy though 
and for the anonymous commenter... he's prob just some miserable douche that goes around hatng on everyone. His words are of no substance. You're a beautiful girl


----------



## Fluffy51888

rg770Ibanez said:


> Tis all right Fluffy, thanks for the sympathy though
> and for the anonymous commenter... he's prob just some miserable douche that goes around hatng on everyone. His words are of no substance. You're a beautiful girl




Thank you so much. It really means a lot that everyone is being so sweet. You guys are the best. :blush:


----------



## nettie

Fluffy51888 said:


> I don't know if any of you have ever heard of Formspring,.... snip ..... I just don't get why some people are so mean.



Jackassery, I say! Really, you are stunning and just absolutely perfect! Sometimes sites like that can become a breeding ground for people spewing their vitriolic comments.


----------



## Alan

Rowan said:


> I don't know how my mother can sit in the next room talking to my grandmother about how worthless and pathetic I am. Heck...even the other day she told a friend of hers on the phone she wished kids were like animals and you had the option to euthanize them when you wanted. I guess her kicking me out is a blessing in disguise. So i'll have all my stuff out by Monday and I'll be staying elsewhere. It just really hurts to have her in there talking about me like that when she knows I can hear it. It's almost like she delights in all the bad things she says about me to her own mother




Rowan, I feel for what you must be going thru...you really need to...STAY AWAY!(it takes 2 to tango, or TANGLE...in this case...don't argue with her, just walk away, I know it may go against your Grain, but it will drive you Insane...arguing only adds fuel to the fire, and hurtful things will be said and unfortunately remembered)...you don't deserve that negativity in your life. She'll come back around eventually..you need your space and she obviously needs hers. Get on with your life and start doing positive things, stuff you enjoy...Replace the Negative and accentuate the Positive...you'll be Much Happier...trust me


----------



## OhLaLaSoSexy

Im sad because im broke and because my evil roomie is coming back a week early from vacation;[ sigh-


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Alan said:


> Rowan, I feel for what you must be going thru...you really need to...STAY AWAY!(it takes 2 to tango, or TANGLE...in this case...don't argue with her, just walk away, I know it may go against your Grain, but it will drive you Insane...arguing only adds fuel to the fire, and hurtful things will be said and unfortunately remembered)...you don't deserve that negativity in your life. She'll come back around eventually..you need your space and she obviously needs hers. Get on with your life and start doing positive things, stuff you enjoy...Replace the Negative and accentuate the Positive...you'll be Much Happier...trust me



Yep, yep, yep........cannot agree more!

Rowan, our mothers are *very* similar.......what Alan suggests really is best......*maybe* in time (lots of time) and distance you can patch things up, but for now, take care of yourself first. She's a grown woman and has made her own choices in life, now she has to clean up the mess she's made and become. Hopefully in about a year I'll be outta here........I cannot wait.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

OhLaLaSoSexy said:


> Im sad because im broke and because my evil roomie is coming back a week early from vacation;[ sigh-



Well crap. Sorry you have an evil roomie, maybe you'll be able to get a better one soon.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Saw this quote and thought of you........ Sorry, don't know who wrote it. 

"Sometimes LOVE is letting go, not holding on."


----------



## Your Plump Princess

I forgot to think about what cake I want for my birthday, what I want on it, and what I want as a gift, for dinner, ect. My birthday is on sunday. I only remembered I forgot about these things because while I was in the bathroom doing my hair, I [once again..] heard my stepmom complaining to my dad about the subject. 

Boy. I Just love to screw myself. :/


----------



## Bearsy

Your Plump Princess said:


> I forgot to think about what cake I want for my birthday, what I want on it, and what I want as a gift, for dinner, ect. My birthday is on sunday. I only remembered I forgot about these things because while I was in the bathroom doing my hair, I [once again..] heard my stepmom complaining to my dad about the subject.
> 
> Boy. I Just love to screw myself. :/



If it makes you feel any better, my last two birthdays have been spent entirely alone.
Well this year I got to go see District 9 at the movies.

I've never had a real birthday party. 
Cake and ice cream after dinner with the family doesn't count in my book.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

Bearsy said:


> If it makes you feel any better, my last two birthdays have been spent entirely alone.
> Well this year I got to go see District 9 at the movies.
> 
> I've never had a real birthday party.
> Cake and ice cream after dinner with the family doesn't count in my book.


If cake and ice cream don't count in your book, I haven't had a birthday party innnn...-Think- ... I can't even remember when that was. Lol


As Anti-Social as I feel right now thanks to my depression. I could definitely tolerate a birthday by myself. Okay, maybe me and Jack. [Daniels. ]


----------



## Micara

Your Plump Princess said:


> If cake and ice cream don't count in your book, I haven't had a birthday party innnn...-Think- ... I can't even remember when that was. Lol
> 
> 
> As Anti-Social as I feel right now thanks to my depression. I could definitely tolerate a birthday by myself. Okay, maybe me and Jack. [Daniels. ]



Awww!  Birthday hugs to you!!!! I really hope your birthday turns out to be happy for you. I am sending you a giant, virtual birthday cake of your favorite kind, complete with a gorgeous nerd wrapped up in a red bow (and nothing else! ) Cheers, my dear! We love you!


----------



## Mathias

Someone I went to high school with passed away last night. I'm having trouble coming to terms with it because his family believes he may have died in his sleep. 


Rest in peace, Sean. We always had alot of fun in Math and Bio.


----------



## mossystate

I am sad that I have no more popsicles. That makes me really sad. There is not a smiley perfect enough to convey the emotions.


----------



## Saoirse

mossystate said:


> I am sad that I have no more popsicles. That makes me really sad. There is not a smiley perfect enough to convey the emotions.



oh man, running out of popsicles makes me sad too! I love orange!:eat2:


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

mossystate said:


> I am sad that I have no more popsicles. That makes me really sad. There is not a smiley perfect enough to convey the emotions.



I'm sad 'cause Mossy mentioned popsicles........now I really want one (well, one box  )


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Saoirse said:


> oh man, running out of popsicles makes me sad too! I love orange!:eat2:



I especially sad since Saoirse mentioned orange popsicles.....I <3 orange ones.... 


 = me imagining eating an orange popsicle


----------



## littlefairywren

Mathias said:


> Someone I went to high school with passed away last night. I'm having trouble coming to terms with it because his family believes he may have died in his sleep.
> 
> 
> Rest in peace, Sean. We always had alot of fun in Math and Bio.



Sorry to hear that Matt....(((hugs)))


----------



## Adamantoise

Mathias said:


> Someone I went to high school with passed away last night. I'm having trouble coming to terms with it because his family believes he may have died in his sleep.
> 
> 
> Rest in peace, Sean. We always had alot of fun in Math and Bio.



That's terrible-I'm so sorry for your loss,Matt.


----------



## mossystate

Saoirse said:


> oh man, running out of popsicles makes me sad too! I love orange!:eat2:





MizzSnakeBite said:


> I'm sad 'cause Mossy mentioned popsicles........now I really want one (well, one box  )



I now have popsicles. Don't fret for me, laaaaadies. They are those ' firecracker ' posicles. 12 singles in a box. That should last me 2 days.


----------



## Ruffie

A friend went to the doctor for her weekly check up as she is in her last month of pregnancy only to find out the baby had died in the womb. My heart just breaks for her right now.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

mossystate said:


> I now have popsicles. Don't fret for me, laaaaadies. They are those ' firecracker ' posicles. 12 singles in a box. That should last me 2 days.



I'm now deeply depressed since Mossy mentioned the firecracker popsicles since those are my all time favorite 

 = pretending to eat a firecracker popsicle.


P.S. Mossy and firecracker popsicles seem entirely appropriate hehehehehe


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

My mom's bi-polar and has borderline personality disorder. She's on meds and is good about taking her lithium (most aren't), BUT she's been very, very manic for the past month or so. During my childhood, what would happen is she'd get manic, crash, try to commit suicide, then off to the psych hospital while I was dumped place to place and often just had to stay home alone. So, I get a nervous when she's so manic. Yes, I'm an adult now and don't worry about being dumped around, but after a lifetime of this, it become a very visceral reaction. I've been having nightmares *every* night for a month now; usually more than one. They're often so bad that I can't sleep the rest of the night, so I'm even more exhausted. I've tried all the numerous techniques to change the nightmare into something positive.......nope. So, I'm very, very stressed out. Very. She cannot increase her lithium more because it sends her levels into the toxic region. I really don't know how much more stress I can handle, and I am on anti-anxiety meds, practice self-hypnosis, etc.

Hopefully in about a year I'll be able to get outta here..........and I'm just hanging on by a thread until then.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Ruffie said:


> A friend went to the doctor for her weekly check up as she is in her last month of pregnancy only to find out the baby had died in the womb. My heart just breaks for her right now.


Oh my god, Ruffie, that is.... oh god. So beyond awful.  There are just no words. I am so, so sorry to hear that. I'll keep your friend in my thoughs. I can't even imagine how she must feel right now.


----------



## littlefairywren

MizzSnakeBite said:


> My mom's bi-polar and has borderline personality disorder. She's on meds and is good about taking her lithium (most aren't), BUT she's been very, very manic for the past month or so. During my childhood, what would happen is she'd get manic, crash, try to commit suicide, then off to the psych hospital while I was dumped place to place and often just had to stay home alone. So, I get a nervous when she's so manic. Yes, I'm an adult now and don't worry about being dumped around, but after a lifetime of this, it become a very visceral reaction. I've been having nightmares *every* night for a month now; usually more than one. They're often so bad that I can't sleep the rest of the night, so I'm even more exhausted. I've tried all the numerous techniques to change the nightmare into something positive.......nope. So, I'm very, very stressed out. Very. She cannot increase her lithium more because it sends her levels into the toxic region. I really don't know how much more stress I can handle, and I am on anti-anxiety meds, practice self-hypnosis, etc.
> 
> Hopefully in about a year I'll be able to get outta here..........and I'm just hanging on by a thread until then.



Big HUGS to you Momma Birdie!!


----------



## Inhibited

BigBeautifulMe said:


> Oh my god, Ruffie, that is.... oh god. So beyond awful.  There are just no words. I am so, so sorry to hear that. I'll keep your friend in my thoughs. I can't even imagine how she must feel right now.



I agree i can't even put into words how sad it is reading this, i think losing a child would be the most devastating thing anyone could ever go through, i know how hard it is to lose a pet the heart ache of losing a child, the sadness that reading post brings me is nothing that your friend is going through..
I'm not religious but i will pray to whoever listens and my thoughts are with your friend....


----------



## mossystate

MizzSnakeBite said:


> Hopefully in about a year I'll be able to get outta here..........and I'm just hanging on by a thread until then.



Keep that thread as strong as possible, Mizz. I hope you both can be in better places in the future. I hope this finds you resting.


----------



## Ruffie

Thank you ladies. I am thankful that her doctor allowed her to have a c-section rather than having to go through labour and not having a child to take home after all that. I am also sad because I have a bad head cold and cannot go and see her. But she really wants to deal with this with her husband and sons right now and when the time is right will reach out to the rest of us.


----------



## luscious_lulu

Rowan said:


> I don't know how my mother can sit in the next room talking to my grandmother about how worthless and pathetic I am. Heck...even the other day she told a friend of hers on the phone she wished kids were like animals and you had the option to euthanize them when you wanted. I guess her kicking me out is a blessing in disguise. So i'll have all my stuff out by Monday and I'll be staying elsewhere. It just really hurts to have her in there talking about me like that when she knows I can hear it. It's almost like she delights in all the bad things she says about me to her own mother



(((Rowan))) 

I don't know your mother, but I hate her. Some people shouldn't be allowed to be parents. She is toxic and cruel. You do not need that in your life. 

I'm sending love your way.


----------



## luscious_lulu

MizzSnakeBite said:


> My mom's bi-polar and has borderline personality disorder. She's on meds and is good about taking her lithium (most aren't), BUT she's been very, very manic for the past month or so. During my childhood, what would happen is she'd get manic, crash, try to commit suicide, then off to the psych hospital while I was dumped place to place and often just had to stay home alone. So, I get a nervous when she's so manic. Yes, I'm an adult now and don't worry about being dumped around, but after a lifetime of this, it become a very visceral reaction. I've been having nightmares *every* night for a month now; usually more than one. They're often so bad that I can't sleep the rest of the night, so I'm even more exhausted. I've tried all the numerous techniques to change the nightmare into something positive.......nope. So, I'm very, very stressed out. Very. She cannot increase her lithium more because it sends her levels into the toxic region. I really don't know how much more stress I can handle, and I am on anti-anxiety meds, practice self-hypnosis, etc.
> 
> Hopefully in about a year I'll be able to get outta here..........and I'm just hanging on by a thread until then.



I'm sorry you have to go through this. I'll keep you in my thoughts. *hugs and kisses*


----------



## spiritangel

the not so nice, condescending email I got from my ex yesterday, why cant he just leave me alone and get over himself?


----------



## littlefairywren

spiritangel said:


> the not so nice, condescending email I got from my ex yesterday, why cant he just leave me alone and get over himself?



Block the peckerhead!
I mean that in the nicest possible way lol


----------



## spiritangel

yes that is the next step believe me, and trust me that is such an insult to peckers lol, hugs and ty


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Mathias said:


> Someone I went to high school with passed away last night. I'm having trouble coming to terms with it because his family believes he may have died in his sleep.
> 
> 
> Rest in peace, Sean. We always had alot of fun in Math and Bio.



I'm so sorry for your loss.
Hugs,
Mizz


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

littlefairywren said:


> Big HUGS to you Momma Birdie!!



Thanks sweetie.



mossystate said:


> Keep that thread as strong as possible, Mizz. I hope you both can be in better places in the future. I hope this finds you resting.



I'm trying, but that thread is unraveling faster and faster........ Can't stop crying and I can never get enough rest........she keeps me up...... I don't know what more I can do...... I've asked her too many times to count to try to keep it down in the middle of the night, but she won't..... I have my door shut, earplugs in, ceiling fan on, and I still hear her banging and slamming things around.... Those 'white noise' CDs actually keep me up. I don't know what more I can do......I've tried it all and a counselor I was seeing didn't have any new ideas for me to try since do or have tried everything she can think of. I need a lot more sleep than the average person since the excruciating 24/7 pain I'm in exhausts me, and I can't get any rest... Then the lack of sleep and rest increases my pain.

When I got up early in the morning to feed the kids (the birds and Ginger, my cat), I found that she left the oven on all night. Then add that she's always leaving the doors unlocked (we live in a very unsafe neighborhood), paper items and potholders on the burners of a gas stove, etc, etc, etc....... It never ends. I'm so tired of having to take care of things around here, keep an eye on her........she seems to care less. When I beg her to please be careful about leaving flammable items on the stove, she says, "oh well, it hasn't caught fire yet." I seriously don't know how much more I can take. There's no one that lives near us that could help me, and if they even lived closer, I doubt they would. They're sick of cleaning up after her messes too.

Her neurologist now refuses to see her because she won't follow through on anything. If she'd get these tests done, then maybe I could get some sort of help, but she won't. Other doctors have refused to see her for the same reason.

I'm so sick of being alone. It feels like the weight of the world is on me to take care of everything. I've had to watch over her my entire life....... I'm at the point of just screw it, let her have to deal with the mess she's made of her life. It's like she's hell bent on self-destruction. I've talked to social workers, my psychiatrist, a counselor, they all agree I need to leave, but I have no options. I don't anywhere near enough money to live on my own; can't work because of my pain disorder. I'm so unhappy and depressed. No wonder why men want nothing to do with me, I have so much going against me. They want someone with a car, their own place, and a job; not someone in pain all the time, living with a mother that tells them all my faults, etc.

Very, very few people get what I'm going though, and really don't want to hear it since they have their own problems. They'll say, "just move." Not so simple when you've loaned everything you've saved to your mother and she never pays you back....

I hope I can make it another year........all I know is I'm getting worse, physically, mentally, and emotionally. Oh well, I've done everything I can think of doing. I'm sick of slapping on a fake smile and saying things are fine when things are awful, but then 99% of people want nothing to do with you when they really know the truth of how bad things really are.

I wish I had someone in RL that really cared about me. My family doesn't give a shit.



luscious_lulu said:


> I'm sorry you have to go through this. I'll keep you in my thoughts. *hugs and kisses*



Thanks lulu.


----------



## mimosa

I have wasted my time on someone that I thought was truly in love with me. His actions were just right. He called me day and night to tell me he loved me. He supported me when my son was in the hospital. He send me gifts in the mail. For Valentine's day he gave me a heart-shaped locket. He was my best friend and lover. I have never met anyone with the same desires and values as my own. He was the closest thing I had to a soul mate. 

Last week, when he called me I asked him: "Do you think we should just be friends?" We are both in complicated situations. This kept coming up in the back of my mind. But I DID NOT want to be just friends. I am totally in love with this man. The next day he called me and told me that we should be just friends. It is the right thing to do. But I am hurting so badly. Everyday I wake up fighting against my broken heart. Sometimes life doesn't want you to have something you really want for a reason. 

I have recently started counseling and working on being the best woman I can be. I thought I was just a lover at heart. But God is showing me that I am also a fighter. I ask you all to please pray for me. All I want now is to find peace in my life. It's been a long hard road for me.


----------



## CPProp

Having read nearly all your posts the one thing that really makes me sad is not being able to give tangible verbal help to any of you  distance dictates the written word, where as the spoken word is what is actually required to emphasize any depth of feeling and understanding. If I was saying this it would probably come out better.


----------



## Rowan

During my trip to Orlando for spring break I saw my ex a couple times. I think deep down I hoped we'd get back together at some point, which was completely retarded of me to think. Having lunch together before I left definitely crushed any thoughts of that. I thought I'd finished with all of the hurting back when he ended things, but was surprised to find it still really stung when he said he'd been with someone else since dumping me. Of course he has...I shouldnt have been surprised. So we ended lunch and I tried not to cry too hard in my car as I drove back to my hotel, mentally kicking myself for ever opening up emotionally in any way again...especially to an ex. So it definitely taught me a lesson...that ex's are just that and should be left in that realm.

I guess what makes me most sad is that it can still hurt and I wish it didnt.


----------



## littlefairywren

Rowan said:


> During my trip to Orlando for spring break I saw my ex a couple times. I think deep down I hoped we'd get back together at some point, which was completely retarded of me to think. Having lunch together before I left definitely crushed any thoughts of that. I thought I'd finished with all of the hurting back when he ended things, but was surprised to find it still really stung when he said he'd been with someone else since dumping me. Of course he has...I shouldnt have been surprised. So we ended lunch and I tried not to cry too hard in my car as I drove back to my hotel, mentally kicking myself for ever opening up emotionally in any way again...especially to an ex. So it definitely taught me a lesson...that ex's are just that and should be left in that realm.
> 
> I guess what makes me most sad is that it can still hurt and I wish it didnt.



(((Rowan))) It completely sucks.....how raw that pain can be, and how overwhelming. Try to move on, no matter how much you want to look back. Warm thoughts to you.


----------



## Nutty

Hopefully these pictures make ya smile


----------



## littlefairywren

Nutty said:


> Hopefully these pictures make ya smile



I just want to smooch him, soooooo cute!


----------



## luscious_lulu

The cruelty that people can inflict on each other. 

I just don't understand how people can be so hateful and mean. I went to a facebook group a friend joined to check it out and in the pictures section there were photo's that had nothing to do with the group. There were 50 or so pictures of women being beaten or demeaned in some way. A few women retaliated by posting pics of men being burnt or hit by a car. 

I reported all of the pictures. It really makes me sad that people find it acceptable or funny.


----------



## Weirdo890

luscious_lulu said:


> The cruelty that people can inflict on each other.
> 
> I just don't understand how people can be so hateful and mean. I went to a facebook group a friend joined to check it out and in the pictures section there were photo's that had nothing to do with the group. There were 50 or so pictures of women being beaten or demeaned in some way. A few women retaliated by posting pics of men being burnt or hit by a car.
> 
> I reported all of the pictures. It really makes me sad that people find it acceptable or funny.



I don't get it either. There are times when I think humanity has the chance to reach the stars, but things like this make me think we can't even crawl out of the mud and squalor.


----------



## Rowan

littlefairywren said:


> (((Rowan))) It completely sucks.....how raw that pain can be, and how overwhelming. Try to move on, no matter how much you want to look back. Warm thoughts to you.



Thanks hon..and I think now that I actually got that closure, maybe I can actually move on and have another real relationship again. Now if only I can find some men who want to date me lol


----------



## Nutty

It may seem rough right now, but after every night there will be a day. Hopefully you feel better.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

CPProp said:


> Having read nearly all your posts the one thing that really makes me sad is not being able to give tangible verbal help to any of you  distance dictates the written word, where as the spoken word is what is actually required to emphasize any depth of feeling and understanding. If I was saying this it would probably come out better.



I completely understand what you're saying; you're a sweetheart. 
:kiss2:,
Mizz


----------



## HottiMegan

Peter Graves died. I loved him on Airplane


----------



## Weirdo890

HottiMegan said:


> Peter Graves died. I loved him on Airplane



That's too bad. I liked the work he did on the Biography Channel, narrating a lot of biographies.


----------



## littlefairywren

HottiMegan said:


> Peter Graves died. I loved him on Airplane



Oh wow, I loved him in that too...but over here it was called Flying High.


----------



## OneWickedAngel

HottiMegan said:


> Peter Graves died. I loved him on Airplane





Weirdo890 said:


> That's too bad. I liked the work he did on the Biography Channel, narrating a lot of biographies.





littlefairywren said:


> Oh wow, I loved him in that too...but over here it was called Flying High.



Peter Graves will first and always be "Mr. Phelps" (Mission Impossible) to me.


----------



## Sensualbbwcurves

That I feel so lonely


----------



## Micara

Sensualbbwcurves said:


> That I feel so lonely



Awww. ((((hugs)))) It happens to the best of us. I hope you feel better soon!


----------



## littlefairywren

Sensualbbwcurves said:


> That I feel so lonely





Micara said:


> Awww. ((((hugs)))) It happens to the best of us. I hope you feel better soon!



Haha...group (((hug)))
Been there hon, and yeah, hope you feel better soon too!


----------



## Micara

I'm covering the Cashier position for the lunch hour, and this lady just came in to buy a yesterday's paper... it turns out that her son's memorial ad was in it. He died a year ago, and he was only 15 and apparently was dragged to death by a car. She told me that she couldn't get out of bed yesterday to come get the paper. It made me feel just terriblly sad for her. How horrible. I can't even imagine.


----------



## NYCGabriel

Feeling like a faliure
Being alone
Not sad at this but angry actually that my Zoloft failed. It made me INCREDIBLY sick 2 nights last week


----------



## Micara

NYCGabriel said:


> Feeling like a faliure
> Being alone
> Not sad at this but angry actually that my Zoloft failed. It made me INCREDIBLY sick 2 nights last week



Aww. Hugs to you! We all feel alone sometimes. And based on your profile, you sound like an awesome person, someone I'd be proud to call a friend. I hope things get better for you.


----------



## Rowan

Even though im having problems with my mom, she got bad news today when she went to see about getting lasik surgery and the doctor told her that she was not a candidate because it appears she has glaucoma (she's 50 years old) and her mother has macular degeneration, and it's genetic, so she'll probably get it too. So she feels like she'll end up on disability from her nursing job, not from her knee problem right now, but from blindness. I feel bad for her...especially since her eye doctor should have caught this when she was having trouble seeing through her glasses a couple of years ago. It also worries me since it's genetic and so now i have to worry about it as well 

So even though we've been having problems, I still feel bad for her going through this.


----------



## Weirdo890

littlefairywren said:


> Haha...group (((hug)))
> Been there hon, and yeah, hope you feel better soon too!





Rowan said:


> Even though im having problems with my mom, she got bad news today when she went to see about getting lasik surgery and the doctor told her that she was not a candidate because it appears she has glaucoma (she's 50 years old) and her mother has macular degeneration, and it's genetic, so she'll probably get it too. So she feels like she'll end up on disability from her nursing job, not from her knee problem right now, but from blindness. I feel bad for her...especially since her eye doctor should have caught this when she was having trouble seeing through her glasses a couple of years ago. It also worries me since it's genetic and so now i have to worry about it as well
> 
> So even though we've been having problems, I still feel bad for her going through this.



I'm sorry to hear that.  I wish her the best.


----------



## Bearsy

My friend is mad sick... he's got something wrong with him and they don't know why or whats wrong. He's been in and out of the hospital for a month and they still don't know what.
He says it feels like he's being stabbed in the chest constantly, he had seizures and shit.
Just an hour ago his Facebook status was 


> maybe everything going on now, is Gods sign that its time for me to go =(
> Maybe its just better that I be with my grandpa and grandma


And then just now he texted me "Dude I'm so afraid, I'm so scared"

I've never seen my brother(cause he might as well be my brother) with any kind of emotion like that. He's been the rock for everyone we know and I'm sitting here crying right now, cause if he's this scared, then fuck, it must be bad.
I don't want dude to die. I love him so much, he's been one of my best friends for 10 years. I couldn't imagine what life would be like without him.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Oh, Bearsy, I don't even know you, but my heart is going out to you and your friend.  I'm so, so sorry. I'll keep him in my thoughts. (((((Bearsy))))))


----------



## Inhibited

BigBeautifulMe said:


> Oh, Bearsy, I don't even know you, but my heart is going out to you and your friend.  I'm so, so sorry. I'll keep him in my thoughts. (((((Bearsy))))))



Similar to what BBM said, i don't know you either and am sorry for what you and your friend are going through, you seem like a good friend and you are both lucky to have each other...


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Sensualbbwcurves said:


> That I feel so lonely



((((HUGS)))) More than you know, we understand. Hope that makes some sort of sense. lol



NYCGabriel said:


> Feeling like a faliure
> Being alone
> Not sad at this but angry actually that my Zoloft failed. It made me INCREDIBLY sick 2 nights last week



and more ((((HUGS)))). I understand.



Rowan said:


> Even though im having problems with my mom, she got bad news today when she went to see about getting lasik surgery and the doctor told her that she was not a candidate because it appears she has glaucoma (she's 50 years old) and her mother has macular degeneration, and it's genetic, so she'll probably get it too. So she feels like she'll end up on disability from her nursing job, not from her knee problem right now, but from blindness. I feel bad for her...especially since her eye doctor should have caught this when she was having trouble seeing through her glasses a couple of years ago. It also worries me since it's genetic and so now i have to worry about it as well
> 
> So even though we've been having problems, I still feel bad for her going through this.



I'm so sorry to hear this Rowan. I hope it skips a generation. You deserve a break in life.



Bearsy said:


> My friend is mad sick... he's got something wrong with him and they don't know why or whats wrong. He's been in and out of the hospital for a month and they still don't know what.
> He says it feels like he's being stabbed in the chest constantly, he had seizures and shit.
> Just an hour ago his Facebook status was
> 
> And then just now he texted me "Dude I'm so afraid, I'm so scared"
> 
> I've never seen my brother(cause he might as well be my brother) with any kind of emotion like that. He's been the rock for everyone we know and I'm sitting here crying right now, cause if he's this scared, then fuck, it must be bad.
> I don't want dude to die. I love him so much, he's been one of my best friends for 10 years. I couldn't imagine what life would be like without him.



(((HUGS))) to you too! I hope they figure out what's causing all of this and can treat it ASAP.


----------



## NYCGabriel

littlefairywren said:


> Haha...group (((hug)))
> Been there hon, and yeah, hope you feel better soon too!



It's great how these virtual hugs cheer me up lol


----------



## NYCGabriel

I wish I can just make a big pot of my Comfort Chili con Carne (NO beans!!!) and invite everyone on this thread for a nice meal. No judgments, no debates, no uncomfortable silences or the like.


----------



## rg770Ibanez

distance sucks pretty bad.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

Memories, like a sea, swallow me whole and choke me down to drown.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

rg770Ibanez said:


> distance sucks pretty bad.





Your Plump Princess said:


> Memories, like a sea, swallow me whole and choke me down to drown.



((Hugs)) to both of you.


----------



## rg770Ibanez

Thank you 
I love e-hugs lol


----------



## littlefairywren

NYCGabriel said:


> I wish I can just make a big pot of my Comfort Chili con Carne (NO beans!!!) and invite everyone on this thread for a nice meal. No judgments, no debates, no uncomfortable silences or the like.



Now that sounds really nice....no beans, and a good time 



rg770Ibanez said:


> distance sucks pretty bad.



It sure does, I totally agree 



Your Plump Princess said:


> Memories, like a sea, swallow me whole and choke me down to drown.



Comforting (((hugs))) my sweet.


----------



## sirGordy

My mom passed away 27 years ago this week. RIP Mom, I miss and love you.


----------



## Sensualbbwcurves

Just being lonely!
It's spring and many things are springing to life...all but me!
It make me sad...


----------



## Sensualbbwcurves

sirGordy said:


> My mom passed away 27 years ago this week. RIP Mom, I miss and love you.



*****HUGS*****
To you!


----------



## NYCGabriel

emotional solitude


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Sensualbbwcurves said:


> Just being lonely!
> It's spring and many things are springing to life...all but me!
> It make me sad...



Hugs to you my dear......I understand.



NYCGabriel said:


> emotional solitude



(((HUGS))) Totally understand.


----------



## GTAFA

I will be going to a funeral for the wife of a good friend. It was quite awe-inspiring to see the strong relationship they had, now shown in the devastation of the dad & 3 daughters. I hate to be selfish but when you see that, it reminds you of your own failure to create a real family. It feels really unfair that their solid home has been torn apart, while mine? ....came apart long ago.

I'm really pleased and honoured, though, that i have been asked to play music at the funeral: an occasion to reflect and honour them all. The least i can do is keep my big mouth shut.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

I weighed myself tonight... 

I'm the largest I've ever been.. . 

..I've been trying to lose weight, because I really really want to ride my bike this summer.. 

Last time I was weighed, last summer, I was 335lbs or around there. 
..And now I'm 372lbs... 

.....Faaaaaaaack. :'(


----------



## Proner

Weather... It's raining and being very windy for now three days and I low and lower as I didn't see sun since nearly three days (I saw it on Monday morning but that's all  ).


----------



## Tyrael

Mostly hmmm life...

Happy me out of happy...

Ah well.. probably just a bit of depression ...


----------



## Linda

Absence does not make the heart grow fonder. Instead, it messes with your mind.


----------



## mimosa

Linda said:


> Absence does not make the heart grow fonder. Instead, it messes with your mind.



I agree with you! :bow:


----------



## mimosa

My son's MRI is coming up. Emotions are running high. I can not even focus on my homework.


----------



## archivaltype

luscious_lulu said:


> The cruelty that people can inflict on each other.
> 
> I just don't understand how people can be so hateful and mean. I went to a facebook group a friend joined to check it out and in the pictures section there were photo's that had nothing to do with the group. There were 50 or so pictures of women being beaten or demeaned in some way. A few women retaliated by posting pics of men being burnt or hit by a car.
> 
> I reported all of the pictures. It really makes me sad that people find it acceptable or funny.



Ugh, this.
One of my "friends" on facebook (I've known her forever and I LOVE her mother, most amazing person ever) posted this status the other day about how fat bitches will always piss her off.
The comments that followed were even worse...fat bitches should all be put in a giant room with a ton of food...and other things. I was shocked and offended, not only at the fat hate, but the cruelty in general. 
Like...WTF? :doh:
All the hate floating around makes me so sad.


----------



## Micara

My daughter's first experience with sudden, unexpected grief...

A boy from her school took his own life this past weekend, and she went to the wake tonight. She came home quite emotional, and we had a talk about depression and suicide. She said, "It's a permanent answer to a temporary problem", which I thought was rather astute of her. I am very sad for his family and friends, but I am glad that she feels that she can share her feelings with me about such a difficult thing.


----------



## Tyrael

I dunno...

Might feel like i maybe said something wrong


----------



## HottiMegan

I am so lonely. I miss having a group of friends. I have only one friend and i'm married to him.


----------



## PhatChk

I am sad that I am sick and no one to take care of me other than my mom. Not that I dont appreciate it but it would be nice if it I had someone to be there in a different level. -_- "sigh"


----------



## AuntHen

finding out some truths and feeling dumb


----------



## wrestlingguy

Learning of the death of another pro wrestler, a guy who I interviewed for my radio/internet show back in 2001, Chris Kanyon.


----------



## Micara

I'm really sad that I'm not the kind of person that I wish I was. And I'm sad that I don't know how to make myself be.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

Micara said:


> I'm really sad that I'm not the kind of person that I wish I was. And I'm sad that I don't know how to make myself be.


Oooh M, I know that one oh too well! 

-Superhug-


----------



## Lamia

I am sad for my brother. 

His 3rd wife told them she wasn't in love with him anymore, after 9 years of marriage they just got a divorce. He just turned 47. She said she just wants a more active lifestyle and they sit at home too much. When he relayed the news to me and my mother he said "I'm just going to be like you mom and live alone from now I guess there is something about me that is unlovable. This is the 3rd wife to leave him. The first two left because they were having affairs. 

He works 10 hours a day breathing in crud doing maintenance at a plant. He comes home in overalls covered in black suit from the chest down. He has a farm so he feeds all his animals and waters them before and after work. So amazingly enough he doesn't have a lot of energy for running around and living. He wants to sit in his recliner and rest. 

My brother is not perfect, but he's pretty damn close. He's good looking, he's a healthy country boy, and he's very faithful. In my cell phone I've given everyone a literary or name from mythology. My mom is Gaia, my dad is Herne, my sister Cleopatra and my brother is Lancelot. 

I had to think long and hard for some people, but for my brother Lancelot comes easy. He strives to do right in every aspect of his life. 

Sorry goodness is so boring these days. It makes me sad that hes going through this shit for a third time!


----------



## Green Eyed Fairy

Lamia said:


> I am sad for my brother.
> 
> His 3rd wife told them she wasn't in love with him anymore, after 9 years of marriage they just got a divorce. He just turned 47. She said she just wants a more active lifestyle and they sit at home too much. When he relayed the news to me and my mother he said "I'm just going to be like you mom and live alone from now I guess there is something about me that is unlovable. This is the 3rd wife to leave him. The first two left because they were having affairs.
> 
> He works 10 hours a day breathing in crud doing maintenance at a plant. He comes home in overalls covered in black suit from the chest down. He has a farm so he feeds all his animals and waters them before and after work. So amazingly enough he doesn't have a lot of energy for running around and living. He wants to sit in his recliner and rest.
> 
> My brother is not perfect, but he's pretty damn close. He's good looking, he's a healthy country boy, and he's very faithful. In my cell phone I've given everyone a literary or name from mythology. My mom is Gaia, my dad is Herne, my sister Cleopatra and my brother is Lancelot.
> 
> I had to think long and hard for some people, but for my brother Lancelot comes easy. He strives to do right in every aspect of his life.
> 
> Sorry goodness is so boring these days. It makes me sad that hes going through this shit for a third time!



You're brother may be unlucky in the romance department, but he is lucky to have someone like you for a sister


----------



## Linda

RIP Uncle Moe.

After a long battle of pancretic cancer that had metasisized all over his body, Dear John ( we call him Moe) passed away this morning at 4am. This battle lasted over a year. Last week home hospice was called in and yesterday his family went over to the island to spend their last Easter with him. I guess after saying all of his goodbyes he felt content enough to just give up his fight. My prayers go out to his family and expecially his daughter and young son.

This is my ex husband's uncle. But that side of the family welcomed me like I was one of their own. Contrary to some comments I have heard I am still going to the funeral to pay my respects. I don't understand how people get so petty. I mean my divorce was not even a nasty one. It might be tough but I am way to proud to not go.


----------



## Oldtimer76

PhatChk said:


> I am sad that I am sick and no one to take care of me other than my mom. Not that I dont appreciate it but it would be nice if it I had someone to be there in a different level. -_- "sigh"



Wish i could be with you, Jossie:wubu:


----------



## Saoirse

We're thinking of having our goat put down. 

She's 15 years old, having pretty bad problems with her hoofs (to the point where we can't trim them anymore) and she's way lonely since our other goat died two winters ago. They grew up together and were bffs.

She's having trouble walking and mostly stays on her knees. She stands in the doorway of the barn and just cries.

Also- we're not sure how we're going to keep feeding her. We're down to our last few bales of hay and even though its nice out and she can eat grass, this will only last a few months. No one in the area has hay, since summer was insanely wet and bad for hay season.

My dad is a kind man who loves all of his animals like family. For him come up with this idea is heart-breaking, mostly because I know he's absolutely right. She's not living the best life she can anymore.

On one hand, Im hoping that the warm spring weather and fresh grass will perk her up. Maybe she just had the winter blues... but on the other hand, I dont ever want her to be in pain.


----------



## mel

Kayleah Wilson has still not been found. She is a child that has been missing for a week from our town. I worry about her every day and not knowing what has happened to her makes me worry for the other children in our community. 

I hope she is safe. I hope she is found soon. I hope she is reunied with her family.


----------



## Cece Larue

http://www.ktbs.com/news/body-of-missing-boy-found-suspect-in-custody/

This has just been making me sick since the news first came out. There are 17 more stories about it on ktbs.com if anyone wants to know me... just search for Justin Bloxom. I just can't understand what kind of sick person would EVER want to harm a child.


----------



## Lamia

Green Eyed Fairy said:


> You're brother may be unlucky in the romance department, but he is lucky to have someone like you for a sister



Thanks!! I felt so bad for him today. He just had his birthday March 31 and now Easter two big things to have come up fresh from being dumped. I will be civil to her as he has requested that we all be nice to her because he says they're going to stay friends. I still want to punch her in the throat for breaking his heart.


----------



## Lamia

Linda said:


> RIP Uncle Moe.
> 
> After a long battle of pancretic cancer that had metasisized all over his body, Dear John ( we call him Moe) passed away this morning at 4am. This battle lasted over a year. Last week home hospice was called in and yesterday his family went over to the island to spend their last Easter with him. I guess after saying all of his goodbyes he felt content enough to just give up his fight. My prayers go out to his family and expecially his daughter and young son.
> 
> This is my ex husband's uncle. But that side of the family welcomed me like I was one of their own. Contrary to some comments I have heard I am still going to the funeral to pay my respects. I don't understand how people get so petty. I mean my divorce was not even a nasty one. It might be tough but I am way to proud to not go.



Sorry for your loss.


----------



## mel

Lamia said:


> Thanks!! I felt so bad for him today. He just had his birthday March 31 and now Easter two big things to have come up fresh from being dumped. I will be civil to her as he has requested that we all be nice to her because he says they're going to stay friends. I still want to punch her in the throat for breaking his heart.



It hurts so bad to have a broken heart..as we all know


----------



## PhatChk

I think my school anxiety is causing me to get ill. I just failed my algebra final and pretty sure the class as well. Now I have to pay for it out of my own pocket yayy ..not -_-


----------



## Rowan

because my parents need to take care of my 21 year old younger brother who has a learning disability who is having a kid with his wife, and her family wont do anything to help them financially or them move in with them...im pretty much being forced out of the apt I just rented with my dad so that the two of them (my brother and his wife) can move in with him and my choices are to move in with my mom (she just kicked me out less than a month ago so she could be single and date losers and me not say anything about it) which is not going to happen...or to find another place to live. All of this on top of having to take finals in a few weeks.

I'm officially tired of living my life and I really just wish I hadnt woken up today.


----------



## Tyrael

Sad.... yes!!!!!!

feeling to explain it..... No!!!!!


----------



## Your Plump Princess

The fact that I got to watch my parents and brother play Wii Fit, andddd I can't, because the board has a weight limit of 330lbs. 

Damn you, Wii Fit company! ;(


----------



## PhatChk

Your Plump Princess said:


> The fact that I got to watch my parents and brother play Wii Fit, andddd I can't, because the board has a weight limit of 330lbs.
> 
> Damn you, Wii Fit company! ;(



I feel you!


----------



## Twilley

The recurring pattern of my relationships; I always manage to hurt the people I care about...


----------



## Inhibited

Your Plump Princess said:


> The fact that I got to watch my parents and brother play Wii Fit, andddd I can't, because the board has a weight limit of 330lbs.
> 
> Damn you, Wii Fit company! ;(



I weigh just over 350 and i still get on it, but my sister has to go on first so it can record her weight and no error comes up..


----------



## HDANGEL15

*My house was robbed while i was at work and it was a gorgeous day. The feeling of invasion / violation, that some stranger rifled through my STUFF, that my cat was here and saw it all or might even rubbed up against him/her/them.

last laugh on them....they stole my MacBook which precious kitty helped knock over a cup of coffee on sunday!!! It was still working, but no telling how long. 
SCORE FOR ME..i totally backed it up, now have a free pass for a new one!!*


----------



## OneWickedAngel

HDANGEL15 said:


> *My house was robbed while i was at work and it was a gorgeous day. The feeling of invasion / violation, that some stranger rifled through my STUFF, that my cat was here and saw it all or might even rubbed up against him/her/them.
> 
> last laugh on them....they stole my MacBook which precious kitty helped knock over a cup of coffee on sunday!!! It was still working, but no telling how long.
> SCORE FOR ME..i totally backed it up, now have a free pass for a new one!!*



Oh man I remember that feeling, it truly sucks! Why do these things almost always seem to happen when you've had a really good day just before it? I'm glad everything is all right otherwise. Cool silver lining in being able to get a new one! Now let's hope that they are severely (but not lethally) allergic to cats and Precious Kitty gives them hives for days on end. Enjoy your new MacBook!


----------



## GTAFA

OneWickedAngel said:


> Oh man I remember that feeling, it truly sucks! Why do these things almost always seem to happen when you've had a really good day just before it?



Imagine if this happened after a really BAD day. I read in the book _Authentic Happiness_ that maybe the "purpose" of happiness is to make us more resilient for tough times. You're stronger after something good happens to you.


----------



## AuntHen

GTAFA said:


> Imagine if this happened after a really BAD day. I read in the book _Authentic Happiness_ that maybe the "purpose" of happiness is to make us more resilient for tough times. You're stronger after something good happens to you.




Hmmm..I feel the bad things make me stronger for EVERYTHING (and make me remember what's truly important in life and thankful for the good I do have)!


----------



## Your Plump Princess

Myself and my Epic-Fail Lifestyle.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Lamia said:


> I am sad for my brother.
> 
> His 3rd wife told them she wasn't in love with him anymore, after 9 years of marriage they just got a divorce. He just turned 47. She said she just wants a more active lifestyle and they sit at home too much. When he relayed the news to me and my mother he said "I'm just going to be like you mom and live alone from now I guess there is something about me that is unlovable. This is the 3rd wife to leave him. The first two left because they were having affairs.
> 
> He works 10 hours a day breathing in crud doing maintenance at a plant. He comes home in overalls covered in black suit from the chest down. He has a farm so he feeds all his animals and waters them before and after work. So amazingly enough he doesn't have a lot of energy for running around and living. He wants to sit in his recliner and rest.
> 
> My brother is not perfect, but he's pretty damn close. He's good looking, he's a healthy country boy, and he's very faithful. In my cell phone I've given everyone a literary or name from mythology. My mom is Gaia, my dad is Herne, my sister Cleopatra and my brother is Lancelot.
> 
> I had to think long and hard for some people, but for my brother Lancelot comes easy. He strives to do right in every aspect of his life.
> 
> Sorry goodness is so boring these days. It makes me sad that hes going through this shit for a third time!



Oh I'm so sorry . Yes, it seems as if being good and nice are bad things to be these days........ I just don't understand that.

You're a wonderful sister for caring so much :bow:



Linda said:


> RIP Uncle Moe.
> 
> 
> 
> .



I'm so sorry for your loss.



Saoirse said:


> We're thinking of having our goat put down.



(((HUGS))) I'm so sorry; it's one of the hardest decisions to make. But it can be the most loving decision....putting aside your pain over losing them and loving them enough to let them go and finally be a piece. I've had to make the decision too many times and it's so hard. I hope you'll be able to have some quality time together before the time comes.

Hugs,
Mizz



Rowan said:


> because my parents need to take care of my 21 year old younger brother who has a learning disability who is having a kid with his wife, and her family wont do anything to help them financially or them move in with them...im pretty much being forced out of the apt I just rented with my dad so that the two of them (my brother and his wife) can move in with him and my choices are to move in with my mom (she just kicked me out less than a month ago so she could be single and date losers and me not say anything about it) which is not going to happen...or to find another place to live. All of this on top of having to take finals in a few weeks.
> 
> I'm officially tired of living my life and I really just wish I hadnt woken up today.



Oh sweetie......I'm so, so sorry. 



Twilley said:


> The recurring pattern of my relationships; I always manage to hurt the people I care about...



Here's the good news.....you now see the pattern, and that's the first step towards righting things. You know, you might feeling better if you go to the people you know you hurt and apologize. It would be good for you and them.



HDANGEL15 said:


> *My house was robbed while i was at work and it was a gorgeous day. The feeling of invasion / violation, that some stranger rifled through my STUFF, that my cat was here and saw it all or might even rubbed up against him/her/them.
> 
> last laugh on them....they stole my MacBook which precious kitty helped knock over a cup of coffee on sunday!!! It was still working, but no telling how long.
> SCORE FOR ME..i totally backed it up, now have a free pass for a new one!!*



How awful!! I'm so glad your cat's ok and didn't run out or anything!!

Yea for the new MacBook!!! 



Your Plump Princess said:


> Myself and my Epic-Fail Lifestyle.



(((HUGS))) to you sweetie.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

I'll be having a painful procedure this coming Thursday and will have to be in the hospital. A huge needle will be jammed in my armpit, then I'll be shocked with electricity to find the most painful area (the more pain the shocks cause, the better  ). Then a catheter will be placed in and I'll have an infusion of anesthetics to numb my left arm and hand (it will be completely useless and I won't be able to move it at all). I'll be awake during the entire procedure so I can scream and tell them how painful it is. Then I get to spend the day at the hospital with them screwing around with my arm. Fun times.


----------



## littlefairywren

MizzSnakeBite said:


> I'll be having a painful procedure this coming Thursday and will have to be in the hospital. A huge needle will be jammed in my armpit, then I'll be shocked with electricity to find the most painful area (the more pain the shocks cause, the better  ). Then a catheter will be placed in and I'll have an infusion of anesthetics to numb my left arm and hand (it will be completely useless and I won't be able to move it at all). I'll be awake during the entire procedure so I can scream and tell them how painful it is. Then I get to spend the day at the hospital with them screwing around with my arm. Fun times.



Even though I can't be there with you my sweet, just know I will be there for you in spirit! Big (((((((huggles)))))))
Luv ya, Devi


----------



## Nutty

mimosa said:


> My son's MRI is coming up. Emotions are running high. I can not even focus on my homework.



Best wishes for your son.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

littlefairywren said:


> Even though I can't be there with you my sweet, just know I will be there for you in spirit! Big (((((((huggles)))))))
> Luv ya, Devi



Wuv you too my wee birdie :wubu:


----------



## Rowan

MizzSnakeBite said:


> I'll be having a painful procedure this coming Thursday and will have to be in the hospital. A huge needle will be jammed in my armpit, then I'll be shocked with electricity to find the most painful area (the more pain the shocks cause, the better  ). Then a catheter will be placed in and I'll have an infusion of anesthetics to numb my left arm and hand (it will be completely useless and I won't be able to move it at all). I'll be awake during the entire procedure so I can scream and tell them how painful it is. Then I get to spend the day at the hospital with them screwing around with my arm. Fun times.



I hate that you have to go through that love...but I will so trade! I have no problems being worked over and tortured physically...it's the emotional that makes me want to just up and die.

I'll be thinking of you sweetheart *big hugs* and if you would like someone to talk to, feel free to call me. You can PM me for my number if you want *big huge healing hugs*


----------



## bmann0413

Your Plump Princess said:


> Myself and my Epic-Fail Lifestyle.



You too, huh? lol


----------



## Surlysomething

HDANGEL15 said:


> *My house was robbed while i was at work and it was a gorgeous day. The feeling of invasion / violation, that some stranger rifled through my STUFF, that my cat was here and saw it all or might even rubbed up against him/her/them.
> 
> last laugh on them....they stole my MacBook which precious kitty helped knock over a cup of coffee on sunday!!! It was still working, but no telling how long.
> SCORE FOR ME..i totally backed it up, now have a free pass for a new one!!*



That sucks. It happened to me once and I felt so violated.

Hope you get a gorgeous new Macbook to replace your stolen one. And I wish a million viruses on the stealer.


----------



## indy500tchr

Rowan said:


> .im pretty much being forced out of the apt I just rented with my dad so that the two of them (my brother and his wife) can move in with him.



If your name is on the lease he can't do that. You have a legal right to be there.


----------



## Lamia

MizzSnakeBite said:


> I'll be having a painful procedure this coming Thursday and will have to be in the hospital. A huge needle will be jammed in my armpit, then I'll be shocked with electricity to find the most painful area (the more pain the shocks cause, the better  ). Then a catheter will be placed in and I'll have an infusion of anesthetics to numb my left arm and hand (it will be completely useless and I won't be able to move it at all). I'll be awake during the entire procedure so I can scream and tell them how painful it is. Then I get to spend the day at the hospital with them screwing around with my arm. Fun times.



 I hope everything went ok. Sorry to hear you're going through that.


----------



## succubus_dxb

sad/angry/confused.....

I just received 2 e-mails from an ex boyfriend...a man who i spent 2 1/2 years of my life with, who turned around and cheated on me....anyway, haven't spoken a word to him since i found out and left almost 2 1/2 years ago....... 


he basically said i am the best thing that ever happened to him. that he is still madly in love with me. and that he is a huge fuck up.


How dare he write to me, thinking that he can justify what he did.....I didn't realise how angry I'd be about this. I never wanted to hear from his sorry ass again.


----------



## luscious_lulu

MizzSnakeBite said:


> I'll be having a painful procedure this coming Thursday and will have to be in the hospital. A huge needle will be jammed in my armpit, then I'll be shocked with electricity to find the most painful area (the more pain the shocks cause, the better  ). Then a catheter will be placed in and I'll have an infusion of anesthetics to numb my left arm and hand (it will be completely useless and I won't be able to move it at all). I'll be awake during the entire procedure so I can scream and tell them how painful it is. Then I get to spend the day at the hospital with them screwing around with my arm. Fun times.



(((hugs))) Sorry you have to go through this babe!


----------



## littlefairywren

succubus_dxb said:


> sad/angry/confused.....
> 
> I just received 2 e-mails from an ex boyfriend...a man who i spent 2 1/2 years of my life with, who turned around and cheated on me....anyway, haven't spoken a word to him since i found out and left almost 2 1/2 years ago.......
> 
> 
> he basically said i am the best thing that ever happened to him. that he is still madly in love with me. and that he is a huge fuck up.
> 
> 
> How dare he write to me, thinking that he can justify what he did.....I didn't realise how angry I'd be about this. I never wanted to hear from his sorry ass again.



He is a peckerhead for what he did to you, a blasted douchebag! All he is doing, is making himself feel better by easing his conscience (I hate it when men do that crap). (((Hugs))) to you girlie!


----------



## CastingPearls

An old flame whom I exiled myself from to begin a new life with my now husband, 9 years ago, recently reconnected with me. 
I've always been his dream girl since we met 14 years ago but I didn't pursue the relationship because I didn't want to break up his marriage.
I initiated the contact because I'd missed him all these years and needed affirmation but was totally blown away by his elated, surprised, excited welcome. We've always had an extreme physical attraction, so much so that other people could sense it even if we were in a crowd apart from each other. We intoxicate each other. He asked if he could see me and I gave it serious thought because I've always loved him but held back out of respect for both marriages. 
Recently he told me that an affair would never ever be enough. Once would never be enough. He would always want more and couldn't live with the inevitable breakup of two marriages and hurting two good people even if we were no longer in love with them. I knew he was right. I loved him even more for doing the right thing. But it broke my heart. I ache for him.


----------



## archivaltype

I lost someone close to my family this weekend. He was a great guy and touched a lot of people. 
We'll miss 'im.


----------



## littlefairywren

archivaltype said:


> I lost someone close to my family this weekend. He was a great guy and touched a lot of people.
> We'll miss 'im.



My sympathies to you, hon....(((hugs)))


----------



## Linda

archivaltype said:


> I lost someone close to my family this weekend. He was a great guy and touched a lot of people.
> We'll miss 'im.



So sorry for your loss. (((Hugs)))


----------



## PhatChk

I am sad that an a FA I met on this site and we had a very awesome friendship. And wanted to make it work but we were just tooo far. Died last night in car accident close to his home in France. I have no way to know if its true or get/give comfort to his friends and family. Don't even know if I have the right to mourn him.


----------



## CastingPearls

PhatChk said:


> I am sad that an a FA I met on this site and we had a very awesome friendship. And wanted to make it work but we were just tooo far. Died last night in car accident close to his home in France. I have no way to know if its true or get/give comfort to his friends and family. Don't even know if I have the right to mourn him.


You have the right to mourn anyone who touches your life. I'm so sorry for your loss.


----------



## Micara

PhatChk said:


> I am sad that an a FA I met on this site and we had a very awesome friendship. And wanted to make it work but we were just tooo far. Died last night in car accident close to his home in France. I have no way to know if its true or get/give comfort to his friends and family. Don't even know if I have the right to mourn him.



That's just terrible. I'm so sorry for your loss.  You have the right to mourn anyone that you care about. I'm really very sorry.


----------



## Proner

PhatChk said:


> I am sad that an a FA I met on this site and we had a very awesome friendship. And wanted to make it work but we were just tooo far. Died last night in car accident close to his home in France. I have no way to know if its true or get/give comfort to his friends and family. Don't even know if I have the right to mourn him.



Damn ! You surely have the right to mourn him I'm very sorry for this loss


----------



## PhatChk

CastingPearls said:


> You have the right to mourn anyone who touches your life. I'm so sorry for your loss.





Micara said:


> That's just terrible. I'm so sorry for your loss.  You have the right to mourn anyone that you care about. I'm really very sorry.





Proner said:


> Damn ! You surely have the right to mourn him I'm very sorry for this loss




Thank you--- But what is worst is that I have no way to verify if this is true or what happened. All I was told is he died in the car accident. His FB account is gone and he cell shut off. I had only talked to one of his friends. This is sad and confusing.


----------



## Proner

PhatChk said:


> Thank you--- But what is worst is that I have no way to verify if this is true or what happened. All I was told is he died in the car accident. His FB account is gone and he cell shut off. I had only talked to one of his friends. This is sad and confusing.



I could make a search in local newspaper if I could help to see if car accidents happened where he live. This situation must be horrible to don't really know 
*hugs*


----------



## OneWickedAngel

PhatChk said:


> I am sad that an a FA I met on this site and we had a very awesome friendship. And wanted to make it work but we were just tooo far. Died last night in car accident close to his home in France. I have no way to know if its true or get/give comfort to his friends and family. Don't even know if I have the right to mourn him.



{{{ Josie }}}}

Honey, I ditto everyone else. If he touched your heart in even the slightest way you absolutely have the right to morn. 



PhatChk said:


> Thank you--- But what is worst is that I have no way to verify if this is true or what happened. All I was told is he died in the car accident. His FB account is gone and he cell shut off. I had only talked to one of his friends. This is sad and confusing.



Take Proner up on his offer and PM him. At least know for sure IF you should be mourning.


----------



## GTAFA

PhatChk said:


> I am sad that an a FA I met on this site and we had a very awesome friendship. And wanted to make it work but we were just tooo far. Died last night in car accident close to his home in France. I have no way to know if its true or get/give comfort to his friends and family. Don't even know if I have the right to mourn him.



Not only do you have the right to mourn, but you knew a side of him that perhaps no one else in his family knew. Your feelings are especially vulnerable because you're denied the usual outlets (a funeral, being part of his community, sharing the memory of him with others who knew him etc).

That's a very poignant and romantic story, likely to touch many on this site, far beyond those who say something to you. Thank you for sharing your experience. For what it's worth you do have friends here, who can try to commiserate & offer loving support.


----------



## PhatChk

CastingPearls said:


> You have the right to mourn anyone who touches your life. I'm so sorry for your loss.





Micara said:


> That's just terrible. I'm so sorry for your loss.  You have the right to mourn anyone that you care about. I'm really very sorry.





Proner said:


> Damn ! You surely have the right to mourn him I'm very sorry for this loss





Proner said:


> I could make a search in local newspaper if I could help to see if car accidents happened where he live. This situation must be horrible to don't really know
> *hugs*





OneWickedAngel said:


> {{{ Josie }}}}
> 
> Honey, I ditto everyone else. If he touched your heart in even the slightest way you absolutely have the right to morn.
> 
> 
> 
> Take Proner up on his offer and PM him. At least know for sure IF you should be mourning.





GTAFA said:


> Not only do you have the right to mourn, but you knew a side of him that perhaps no one else in his family knew. Your feelings are especially vulnerable because you're denied the usual outlets (a funeral, being part of his community, sharing the memory of him with others who knew him etc).
> 
> That's a very poignant and romantic story, likely to touch many on this site, far beyond those who say something to you. Thank you for sharing your experience. For what it's worth you do have friends here, who can try to commiserate & offer loving support.



You guys are incredible! Thank you!


----------



## mossystate

PhatChik, no matter if it is true or not, you would still mourn. Sorry this has happened. The whole thing about the FB account and the cell number being gone...right after his death...well, that is a little odd. Maybe ask the friend for information on where to send the family a card...something like that.


----------



## Adamantoise

PhatChk said:


> I am sad that an a FA I met on this site and we had a very awesome friendship. And wanted to make it work but we were just tooo far. Died last night in car accident close to his home in France. I have no way to know if its true or get/give comfort to his friends and family. Don't even know if I have the right to mourn him.



I am truly sorry for your loss,PhatChk-it's never easy to hear of a death,especially one of someone you have interacted with one way or another. I think it's perfectly alright for you to mourn him,honey.

I went to the funeral of the grandmother of a dear freind of mine today-it was a very heavy experience,but I stuck with her through it.


----------



## PhatChk

mossystate said:


> PhatChik, no matter if it is true or not, you would still mourn. Sorry this has happened. The whole thing about the FB account and the cell number being gone...right after his death...well, that is a little odd. Maybe ask the friend for information on where to send the family a card...something like that.



Thats my fear. I have no way of contacting her (the friend). My life line was that phone. 



Adamantoise said:


> I am truly sorry for your loss,PhatChk-it's never easy to hear of a death,especially one of someone you have interacted with one way or another. I think it's perfectly alright for you to mourn him,honey.
> 
> I went to the funeral of the grandmother of a dear freind of mine today-it was a very heavy experience,but I stuck with her through it.



Thank you. 

You are a great friend.


----------



## luscious_lulu

PhatChk said:


> Thank you--- But what is worst is that I have no way to verify if this is true or what happened. All I was told is he died in the car accident. His FB account is gone and he cell shut off. I had only talked to one of his friends. This is sad and confusing.



(((hugs))) I'm sorry you have to deal with this.


----------



## ladle

I am crushed...never in my life have a felt so low. Finally meet the woman of my dreams only to hear she is interested in another guy and 'just wants to stay friends'
I feel like I am walking about like a zombie. Empty and void of all emotion...
GUTTED, truly GUTTED


----------



## littlefairywren

PhatChk said:


> I am sad that an a FA I met on this site and we had a very awesome friendship. And wanted to make it work but we were just tooo far. Died last night in car accident close to his home in France. I have no way to know if its true or get/give comfort to his friends and family. Don't even know if I have the right to mourn him.



Hon, you have every right to mourn. I am so sorry....(((hugs)))



ladle said:


> I am crushed...never in my life have a felt so low. Finally meet the woman of my dreams only to hear she is interested in another guy and 'just wants to stay friends'
> I feel like I am walking about like a zombie. Empty and void of all emotion...
> GUTTED, truly GUTTED



That sucks! I know how that feels, so ((hugs)) to you.


----------



## CastingPearls

ladle said:


> I am crushed...never in my life have a felt so low. Finally meet the woman of my dreams only to hear she is interested in another guy and 'just wants to stay friends'
> I feel like I am walking about like a zombie. Empty and void of all emotion...
> GUTTED, truly GUTTED


That sucks! What I learned to do after the initial sting faded was to chalk it up to the other person doing me a favor by removing themselves from the available pool. I was one person closer to a person meant to be with me.


----------



## HottiMegan

May 19th is the day we schedule a BIG surgery for Max. I'm sad that this will be his 12th time to go under. I am afraid for him every single time. He has aspirated twice in his life. Once it resulted in pneumonia. This surgery will have a bone graft and ear reconstruction. Meaning many ah hours under the knife. i hate it that my little boy has been through so much in his short life. This will be one of two surgeries (at least) in his ear reconstruction. I'm sad about it.


----------



## PhatChk

luscious_lulu said:


> (((hugs))) I'm sorry you have to deal with this.



Thank you for being so nice



ladle said:


> I am crushed...never in my life have a felt so low. Finally meet the woman of my dreams only to hear she is interested in another guy and 'just wants to stay friends'
> I feel like I am walking about like a zombie. Empty and void of all emotion...
> GUTTED, truly GUTTED



I am sorry ladle I know how that feels.



littlefairywren said:


> Hon, you have every right to mourn. I am so sorry....(((hugs)))
> 
> 
> 
> That sucks! I know how that feels, so ((hugs)) to you.



Thank you.



HottiMegan said:


> May 19th is the day we schedule a BIG surgery for Max. I'm sad that this will be his 12th time to go under. I am afraid for him every single time. He has aspirated twice in his life. Once it resulted in pneumonia. This surgery will have a bone graft and ear reconstruction. Meaning many ah hours under the knife. i hate it that my little boy has been through so much in his short life. This will be one of two surgeries (at least) in his ear reconstruction. I'm sad about it.



I'll pray for you both. Hope everything goes well for you guys.


----------



## Linda

ladle said:


> I am crushed...never in my life have a felt so low. Finally meet the woman of my dreams only to hear she is interested in another guy and 'just wants to stay friends'
> I feel like I am walking about like a zombie. Empty and void of all emotion...
> GUTTED, truly GUTTED





Oh no! You got dealt the friend card. So sorry.  I know it sucks right now, but things will get better.


----------



## KittyKitten

I feel like crying, but I remember my dad being this strong, tall man that protected over us. Now he is old, frail, suffers from high blood pressure, with knees so bad that he has difficulty climbing up the stairs and walks very slow. I feel like it is MY turn to protect HIM. I know it is inevitable, but watching your parents become old and frail hurts. I saw my father cry for the first time in my life when he said he felt his children weren't spending enough time with him. That tore me up, a person never wants to see her father cry. Now I try to watch a movie with him at least once every Friday--I am much closer to him now.


----------



## ladle

Linda said:


> Oh no! You got dealt the friend card. So sorry.  I know it sucks right now, but things will get better.



Thanks everyone. Have decided that I am always the 'nice guy/great friend/funny guy/caring guy/good listener' card


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Have you missed the 80,000 women in the US with crushes on you? 

lol.


----------



## CastingPearls

ladle said:


> Thanks everyone. Have decided that I am always the 'nice guy/great friend/funny guy/caring guy/good listener' card


I married one of those guys. You have a lot to offer. It's only a matter of time.


----------



## ladle

80,000 is a bit of a stretch....maybe 80,000lbs worth of women...lol
Thanks for the cheer up folks


----------



## succubus_dxb

Ladle...I'm just waiting for you to come to your senses and swim over here and sweep me off my feet  

Seriously though, so sorry to hear that  




and I am upset because i just went to 'checkout' with my ASOS awesome sale stuff, and the SITE HAS CRASHED. Hope I don't miss out  (yes, this is a very big deal)


----------



## HottiMegan

PhatChk said:


> I'll pray for you both. Hope everything goes well for you guys.



Thanks. I just have to leave it with god but that's really hard sometimes. His life has been such a struggle .


----------



## BeautifulBigD

HottiMegan said:


> Thanks. I just have to leave it with god but that's really hard sometimes. His life has been such a struggle .




I feel for you, your son, and your family. I cannot begin to imagine the struggle you all go through. Please know you are in my prayers.


----------



## Nutty

HottiMegan said:


> May 19th is the day we schedule a BIG surgery for Max. I'm sad that this will be his 12th time to go under. I am afraid for him every single time. He has aspirated twice in his life. Once it resulted in pneumonia. This surgery will have a bone graft and ear reconstruction. Meaning many ah hours under the knife. i hate it that my little boy has been through so much in his short life. This will be one of two surgeries (at least) in his ear reconstruction. I'm sad about it.



Aw, I only wish you, your son, and your family the best of luck.


----------



## Sensualbbwcurves

*I am sad due to the fact that my 14 month old daughter has a cold and an ear infection...I hope her meds kick in fast!*​


----------



## Micara

I'm really sad because my boyfriend and fellow Dims member Weirdo890 broke his ankle today, and is having surgery tomorrow. I'm scared and really, really wish I could be there to take care of him.


----------



## littlefairywren

Micara said:


> I'm really sad because my boyfriend and fellow Dims member Weirdo890 broke his ankle today, and is having surgery tomorrow. I'm scared and really, really wish I could be there to take care of him.



Wish him good luck from me please, Micara! I am sure he will be ok, and running around in no time


----------



## Your Plump Princess

I'm really sad, to the point of crying [because I am a big ball of fluff.] because one of my closest guyfriends gave me the "Don't Worry About me " Speech. Because apparently, he will be going overseas, and flat out said there is a 50/50 chance he won't come back.

..I've known this man for 6-7 years. 
He lives somewhere in NY, I've never been able to visit him, anything.
I've loved him forever, he's like a brother to me. 

What killed me most was he said "as much as I hate this country, theres still things here I have to protect. Your one of them." 


So far, I've had two cousins, and two other close guyfriends choose to join the military. They joined the Air Force and Navy, Honestly? I'm so sick of the "Don't Worry" shit.


----------



## balletguy

well its monday, and thats pretty bad


----------



## CastingPearls

Today we would have been celebrating my mother's 63rd birthday. I know she is always near me and we will reunite one day, but I miss her physical presence. I would give a year of my life to kiss her or hold her hand one more time. We lost her in 2002 to an agonizing battle with gastric cancer.

Mom, I will love you forever. I look in the mirror and I see your face. I speak and I hear your voice. I hope I make you proud. I need you so much right now, but I know when you slipped away that I was and still am thoroughly and completely loved.


----------



## OneWickedAngel

Micara said:


> I'm really sad because my boyfriend and fellow Dims member Weirdo890 broke his ankle today, and is having surgery tomorrow. I'm scared and really, really wish I could be there to take care of him.



Ah, now I understand the private jet / teleport remark in the other thread. You're with him in spirit and he knows it. He'll be fine and, as LFW said, running around in no time. Sending love vibes for you two find a way to get together soon!



Your Plump Princess said:


> I'm really sad, to the point of crying [because I am a big ball of fluff.] because one of my closest guyfriends gave me the "Don't Worry About me " Speech. Because apparently, he will be going overseas, and flat out said there is a 50/50 chance he won't come back.
> 
> ..I've known this man for 6-7 years.
> He lives somewhere in NY, I've never been able to visit him, anything.
> I've loved him forever, he's like a brother to me.
> 
> What killed me most was he said "as much as I hate this country, theres still things here I have to protect. Your one of them."
> 
> So far, I've had two cousins, and two other close guyfriends choose to join the military. They joined the Air Force and Navy, Honestly? I'm so sick of the "Don't Worry" shit.



{{{YPP }}}
Can't lie about it; the waiting and the trying not to worry on this side of the ocean is hard. Concentrate on the 50% that will bring them all home safely physically and mentally. You have to do the very thing they are over there fighting for: LIVE. Not huddled up in a ball of worry, but out there in the world living. They are risking their lives so we can live ours - to do other wise dishonors them. So please, keep having your picnics with the family and keep posting more bunny pics *(OMG YES PLEASE!)*


----------



## isamarie69

I can't talk about it, but i can tell you its making me very very sad right now!!!!


----------



## Nutty

I'm sad because of all these sad people . Hope everyone feels better


----------



## KittyKitten

Nutty said:


> I'm sad because of all these sad people . Hope everyone feels better



Thank you Nutty, you are definitely the kindest poster here who doesn't hold any grudges. May God bless you and always continue to show your kind-spirit.


----------



## Nutty

happyface83 said:


> Thank you Nutty, you are definitely the kindest poster here who doesn't hold any grudges. May God bless you and always continue to show your kind-spirit.



Thank you


----------



## CastingPearls

happyface83 said:


> Thank you Nutty, you are definitely the kindest poster here who doesn't hold any grudges. May God bless you and always continue to show your kind-spirit.


Nutman absolutely does have a good heart.


----------



## Nutty

CastingPearls said:


> Nutman absolutely does have a good heart.



I wish I could rep you both for your generous comments, but alas i am out of rep for you two


----------



## Linda

Nutty said:


> I wish I could rep you both for your generous comments, but alas i am out of rep for you two



I got them Nutster


----------



## KittyKitten

Nutty, you remind me of another poster on one board I used to go to, his name was BabyBoi, but he's black. He just had that free-spirited, good nature like you.


----------



## Weeze

That I don't see more of a demand/solution for more abundant and affordable women's education. Why does it have to be 20k+ a year? No one really feels a need to come up with a solution for this, or am I just missing something?


----------



## PamelaLois

I'm sad because this Friday would have been my parents' 50th wedding anniversary, and Saturday would have been my Dad's 76th birthday. My dad passed away last November right before Thanksgiving. I am tired of having to be the strong one and not having anyone to be strong for me. I have to call my Mom tomorrow morning (she lives in Florida and I am in Chicago) and be strong and comforting for her and I don't have anyone to do that for me. People ask me if I'm OK and, of course, I say I'm fine. Well, the truth is, I am NOT fine, but I can't tell people that because I am the "strong" one. I hate that word, despise it. I don't want to have to be the one everyone relies on for comfort. I wish I had someone I could just curl up with and who would just let me cry and be a mess. But, then, that wouldn't be "strong" would it. I don't want to go to work all weekend and have to pretend to be all happy and bubbly with my co-workers, but that's what's expected of me and it would make everyone uncomfortable if I wasn't, and of course, I am the strong one and would never make my co-workers uncomfortable. 

I am sitting here trying to decide if I even want to hit the submit reply button because this post is sad and I don't want to make anyone sad. How ridiculous is that, in a thread entitled "What's making you sad right now,..."


----------



## Your Plump Princess

I just got an offline IM from my stepmom, Prematurely punishing me for undone chores.

Yeah. Cause the thing I want to do most on EARTH DAY is be stuck inside.


----------



## Weeze

Your Plump Princess said:


> I just got an offline IM from my stepmom, Prematurely punishing me for undone chores.
> 
> Yeah. Cause the thing I want to do most on EARTH DAY is be stuck inside.



I completely know what it's like to live with and partially depend on your parents, but from the posts I've seen of yours... well... At 20 years old, i think it's time to start setting boundaries and limits with your parents. Get a job, pay rent. It gives them a lot less leverage over you. Yes, they'll always be your parents and they'll always have that little nag, but seriously, it sounds like you've got to try something different. An offline IM? My parents don't even know my screenname, because they simply don't *have* to... because i'm 20. (almost.)


----------



## luscious_lulu

Micara said:


> I'm really sad because my boyfriend and fellow Dims member Weirdo890 broke his ankle today, and is having surgery tomorrow. I'm scared and really, really wish I could be there to take care of him.



(((hugs))) How is he?



PamelaLois said:


> I'm sad because this Friday would have been my parents' 50th wedding anniversary, and Saturday would have been my Dad's 76th birthday. My dad passed away last November right before Thanksgiving. I am tired of having to be the strong one and not having anyone to be strong for me. I have to call my Mom tomorrow morning (she lives in Florida and I am in Chicago) and be strong and comforting for her and I don't have anyone to do that for me. People ask me if I'm OK and, of course, I say I'm fine. Well, the truth is, I am NOT fine, but I can't tell people that because I am the "strong" one. I hate that word, despise it. I don't want to have to be the one everyone relies on for comfort. I wish I had someone I could just curl up with and who would just let me cry and be a mess. But, then, that wouldn't be "strong" would it. I don't want to go to work all weekend and have to pretend to be all happy and bubbly with my co-workers, but that's what's expected of me and it would make everyone uncomfortable if I wasn't, and of course, I am the strong one and would never make my co-workers uncomfortable.
> 
> I am sitting here trying to decide if I even want to hit the submit reply button because this post is sad and I don't want to make anyone sad. How ridiculous is that, in a thread entitled "What's making you sad right now,..."




We are the perfect people to confess this to. Everyone needs an outlet. We can be yours.


----------



## Surlysomething

Weeze said:


> I completely know what it's like to live with and partially depend on your parents, but from the posts I've seen of yours... well... At 20 years old, i think it's time to start setting boundaries and limits with your parents. Get a job, pay rent. It gives them a lot less leverage over you. Yes, they'll always be your parents and they'll always have that little nag, but seriously, it sounds like you've got to try something different. An offline IM? My parents don't even know my screenname, because they simply don't *have* to... because i'm 20. (almost.)



I totally agree with this. The only "chores" I had at 20 were self inflicted and mainly had to do with keeping enough money in my wallet to take a cab home.


----------



## isamarie69

Im sad because i really miss someone and there is nothing i can do to fix it! Even if it was my fault.


----------



## spiritangel

big squishy hugs everyone 

I am bummed I went to bed early and missed a very very very dear friend online last night, cause he is on so rarely and I miss talking to him,


----------



## HottiMegan

I slipped and fell at a grocery store about a year and a half ago. I never went to a doctor about it but ever since then i get intense cant walk pain in my left hip (the side i landed on). It flares up for a few days and i'm back to normal. I woke up and had that intense pain. I took 4 advil and can barely sit here without pain. Imagine having to get up and chase after a precocious toddler too. It hurts so badly. I am so kicking myself that i didn't seek medical care right after the fall.


----------



## CastingPearls

I'm really sad today and hesitate to post but I've been crying about it all day.

I've been getting extensive dental work done for the past few months. We're nearing the end which is good but I was really looking forward to ONE THING which was getting my teeth bleached after years of smoking. (I quit years ago) and also acid damage from when I was sick. It's been planned and budgeted for a long time and I had to sacrifice a lot to budget it. My appointment has been moved, changed, etc. so many times either because of the dentist office's needs, my own family obligations, or miscommunication.
As my dentist was finishing up with a small but very painful procedure she told me I was bleeding too much and we'd have to postpone the bleaching again. I realize why and the wisdom of it but I've waited years to repair my smile.
Meanwhile, every week I visit my elderly father and Grandmother to help out and keep them company for the day. I've switched around several appointments to help them out which I was happy to but tomorrow we were going to celebrate my birthday and they were talking for days about what we'd do, what we'd be having for dinner and I was really looking forward to it. Since my mother and sister died and my husband doesn't grasp the concept of family or celebrations, I've been feeling really lost and unimportant to the people I love the most especially the one day of the year that means something to me. 

So my father called me and said.. Uh..when you come over tomorrow we're having this for dinner. I asked..What happened to having a little party and celebrating my birthday? He said...Oh, I can't be bothered with that. 

I was so hurt that my own father couldn't even be bothered with celebrating my birthday. I make an effort to see them and make sure they're well and need for nothing. I didn't need a big party just an acknowledgment from the people I love that I mattered especially since I don't even expect a fucking card from my own husband.


----------



## Micara

CastingPearls said:


> I'm really sad today and hesitate to post but I've been crying about it all day.
> 
> I've been getting extensive dental work done for the past few months. We're nearing the end which is good but I was really looking forward to ONE THING which was getting my teeth bleached after years of smoking. (I quit years ago) and also acid damage from when I was sick. It's been planned and budgeted for a long time and I had to sacrifice a lot to budget it. My appointment has been moved, changed, etc. so many times either because of the dentist office's needs, my own family obligations, or miscommunication.
> As my dentist was finishing up with a small but very painful procedure she told me I was bleeding too much and we'd have to postpone the bleaching again. I realize why and the wisdom of it but I've waited years to repair my smile.
> Meanwhile, every week I visit my elderly father and Grandmother to help out and keep them company for the day. I've switched around several appointments to help them out which I was happy to but tomorrow we were going to celebrate my birthday and they were talking for days about what we'd do, what we'd be having for dinner and I was really looking forward to it. Since my mother and sister died and my husband doesn't grasp the concept of family or celebrations, I've been feeling really lost and unimportant to the people I love the most especially the one day of the year that means something to me.
> 
> So my father called me and said.. Uh..when you come over tomorrow we're having this for dinner. I asked..What happened to having a little party and celebrating my birthday? He said...Oh, I can't be bothered with that.
> 
> I was so hurt that my own father couldn't even be bothered with celebrating my birthday. I make an effort to see them and make sure they're well and need for nothing. I didn't need a big party just an acknowledgment from the people I love that I mattered especially since I don't even expect a fucking card from my own husband.




((((Hugs)))) I'm so sorry, Elaine.  I remember how emotional I got waiting for my smile to finally look nice after years and years of bad teeth. I still subconsciously put my hand over my mouth when I smile sometimes. You will get there, and you are beautiful with or without a white smile. 

I'm really sorry that your birthday is not turning out to be special for you. Sometimes men just don't get it about birthdays or holidays. I hope that he realizes how important it is to you, and comes through for you. If not, please know that I, and I'm sure all our fellow Dims friends, wish you the happiest birthday imaginable. You are an awesome, awesome lady that I look up to. I hope that everything turns out okay for you. Lots of hugs coming your way!


----------



## littlefairywren

CastingPearls said:


> I'm really sad today and hesitate to post but I've been crying about it all day.
> 
> I've been getting extensive dental work done for the past few months. We're nearing the end which is good but I was really looking forward to ONE THING which was getting my teeth bleached after years of smoking. (I quit years ago) and also acid damage from when I was sick. It's been planned and budgeted for a long time and I had to sacrifice a lot to budget it. My appointment has been moved, changed, etc. so many times either because of the dentist office's needs, my own family obligations, or miscommunication.
> As my dentist was finishing up with a small but very painful procedure she told me I was bleeding too much and we'd have to postpone the bleaching again. I realize why and the wisdom of it but I've waited years to repair my smile.
> Meanwhile, every week I visit my elderly father and Grandmother to help out and keep them company for the day. I've switched around several appointments to help them out which I was happy to but tomorrow we were going to celebrate my birthday and they were talking for days about what we'd do, what we'd be having for dinner and I was really looking forward to it. Since my mother and sister died and my husband doesn't grasp the concept of family or celebrations, I've been feeling really lost and unimportant to the people I love the most especially the one day of the year that means something to me.
> 
> So my father called me and said.. Uh..when you come over tomorrow we're having this for dinner. I asked..What happened to having a little party and celebrating my birthday? He said...Oh, I can't be bothered with that.
> 
> I was so hurt that my own father couldn't even be bothered with celebrating my birthday. I make an effort to see them and make sure they're well and need for nothing. I didn't need a big party just an acknowledgment from the people I love that I mattered especially since I don't even expect a fucking card from my own husband.



Big soft warm ((((hugs)))), I am so sorry you are hurting CP


----------



## spiritangel

Big Squishy Hugs CP, you are worth far more than they realise. Just remember how amazing you are, and do something special for yourself for your Birthday


----------



## isamarie69

Im sorry your having a horrible day, Your birthday is tomorrow? Happy early birthday. Family is really retarded they don't think, Im also the one who seems to take care of everyone else. So i totally understand.

You seem really sweet and kind, i wish i could come throw you a great big day just for you. I always make my birthday last a week atleast. Even if i have to do it alone. I think you should do the same, make the day yours!!!.

Go out to brunch buy yourself something little (i know your budgeting) But something your really want that you keep putting off because you feel its frivolous.

Maybe we could all go to that tiny chat thing and have a internet party  in the afternoon? That would be fun.


----------



## spiritangel

isamarie69 said:


> Maybe we could all go to that tiny chat thing and have a internet party  in the afternoon? That would be fun.




thats an awesome Idea!!


----------



## CastingPearls

Thanks for the hugs everyone. My birthday is actually Sunday but I'm still going to my dad's tomorrow because my Grandmother is 86 and really looks forward to me coming every week. So I'm just going to deal and not expect anything.

I bought myself a small gift last week (a gazing ball) and was hoping to get a stand for it tomorrow. This will also be an opportunity to take my grandmother to the garden center because it's hard for her to get around, but she loves her garden, it's conveniently located and a friend owns it and will be very helpful with her walker if necessary.

My husband mentioned we'd be going out to dinner for my birthday but in the same breath he said he didn't know if we had the money which is his usual passive-aggressive tactic. The visit to my dad's is actually the HIGHLIGHT of my birthday because of my heart NOT being in going around the same bullshit game with my husband ON my birthday. I'm so weary of people throwing me crumbs and expecting applause for token efforts.

I'm usually very very positive and upbeat and encourage everyone but even I have my limits and this has become a very draining discouraging time in my life. I thought for sure that 2010 was going to be 'my year' because it seems like we go through cycles of crappy times and happy times and the last 7 years were hellacious.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

I'm so sorry, Pearls.  You are vivacious and kind, and you deserve so much better. It's too bad you aren't closer - we'd totally be throwing you an impromptu party.


----------



## DitzyBrunette

CP, I bet if we all could afford it we would fly you all around the country to visit us all in our home states and have big parties for you. I agree with the other ladies, you deserve it and you're a great person - I'm sorry you're feeling sad and you shouldn't have to feel that way on your birthday =(


----------



## Your Plump Princess

Pearls, I am so so sorry to hear you have ungrateful people as your parents and husband. Your such a warm person, so beautiful, funny, and smart. I hope maybe one day they'll see the gold they've been treating like dirt. 




..Oh, to be relevant to the thread.
I'm sad my friend/crush/love-interest told me that he shouldn't have said anything because he didn't want to create false hopes.

So I am back to relying on my imagination during my lonley moments. How lovely, I get to feel 14 again.


----------



## AuntHen

where to begin...


----------



## JMCGB

fat9276 said:


> where to begin...



i second this!


----------



## Linda

It's raining and I was going to fire up the grill here in a bit.

Oh well, screw it, I will grill in the rain.


----------



## littlefairywren

I am sad, because I am missing someone dear to my heart. The internet makes us all seem so close, till one of us disappears. Where are you my girl?


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

I think I know exactly who you mean, as I've been wondering the same thing. Two weeks and nary a post is strange.


----------



## Gingembre

I think I know who you mean too. Hope all is well.


----------



## KittyKitten

CastingPearls said:


> I'm really sad today and hesitate to post but I've been crying about it all day.
> 
> I've been getting extensive dental work done for the past few months. We're nearing the end which is good but I was really looking forward to ONE THING which was getting my teeth bleached after years of smoking. (I quit years ago) and also acid damage from when I was sick. It's been planned and budgeted for a long time and I had to sacrifice a lot to budget it. My appointment has been moved, changed, etc. so many times either because of the dentist office's needs, my own family obligations, or miscommunication.
> As my dentist was finishing up with a small but very painful procedure she told me I was bleeding too much and we'd have to postpone the bleaching again. I realize why and the wisdom of it but I've waited years to repair my smile.
> Meanwhile, every week I visit my elderly father and Grandmother to help out and keep them company for the day. I've switched around several appointments to help them out which I was happy to but tomorrow we were going to celebrate my birthday and they were talking for days about what we'd do, what we'd be having for dinner and I was really looking forward to it. Since my mother and sister died and my husband doesn't grasp the concept of family or celebrations, I've been feeling really lost and unimportant to the people I love the most especially the one day of the year that means something to me.
> 
> So my father called me and said.. Uh..when you come over tomorrow we're having this for dinner. I asked..What happened to having a little party and celebrating my birthday? He said...Oh, I can't be bothered with that.
> 
> I was so hurt that my own father couldn't even be bothered with celebrating my birthday. I make an effort to see them and make sure they're well and need for nothing. I didn't need a big party just an acknowledgment from the people I love that I mattered especially since I don't even expect a fucking card from my own husband.



I'm sorry Casting Pearls. Sometimes family can let you down.


----------



## Rowan

My brother came so close to getting into a rehab program and getting help...then they didnt have a bed and so he's just back at my dad's and using my dad and younger brother for what he can. He's supposed to be calling every day to see if a bed has opened up. He hasnt been doing that, hasnt been paying his bail bondsman for being out of jail, back to using my family for everything he can...and Im tired of it. 

I'm going to give him an ultimatum since my parents dont seem to have the heart to, that I will be calling the rehab place every evening to find out if he called to see if they had a bed that day, and if he hasn't, I'm calling his bail bondsman. He has a choice and it's going to be his to make and I'm going to force his hand to do it. My name is on the lease with my dad and I'm not going to have my brother living there endangering himself, my father, other brother and his wife and their unborn child. So... Jail or Rehab. His choice. I am tired of sitting here waiting for the call that he got himself killed in some bad drug deal or some other bs. So it's jail or rehab, like I said...his choice. *sigh*


----------



## CastingPearls

Rowan said:


> My brother came so close to getting into a rehab program and getting help...then they didnt have a bed and so he's just back at my dad's and using my dad and younger brother for what he can. He's supposed to be calling every day to see if a bed has opened up. He hasnt been doing that, hasnt been paying his bail bondsman for being out of jail, back to using my family for everything he can...and Im tired of it.
> 
> I'm going to give him an ultimatum since my parents dont seem to have the heart to, that I will be calling the rehab place every evening to find out if he called to see if they had a bed that day, and if he hasn't, I'm calling his bail bondsman. He has a choice and it's going to be his to make and I'm going to force his hand to do it. My name is on the lease with my dad and I'm not going to have my brother living there endangering himself, my father, other brother and his wife and their unborn child. So... Jail or Rehab. His choice. I am tired of sitting here waiting for the call that he got himself killed in some bad drug deal or some other bs. So it's jail or rehab, like I said...his choice. *sigh*


I'm so sorry Rowan. I have a close relative who's a drug abuser and recently lost another to longterm complications from heroin addiction. The death of the latter is what's causing everyone to enable the former. This relative is unemployed, dependent completely on family and usually non-functional. If we do an intervention he says he will kill himself and we can't afford any rehab. It's a lose-lose situation. You are not alone.


----------



## Rowan

CastingPearls said:


> I'm so sorry Rowan. I have a close relative who's a drug abuser and recently lost another to longterm complications from heroin addiction. The death of the latter is what's causing everyone to enable the former. This relative is unemployed, dependent completely on family and usually non-functional. If we do an intervention he says he will kill himself and we can't afford any rehab. It's a lose-lose situation. You are not alone.



Thankfully the place I am referring to is called Meridian and it's a state funded thing. Of course my dad called and chewed my mom out for saying anything to me and getting me worked up about the whole situation. I don't know why my dad is okay with my brother behaving like this. He already used up a $4k loan my dad got out of his retirement, steals my dad's pain pills...its just one thing after another. I'm tired of his behaviour helping to destroy this family


----------



## CastingPearls

Stolen pain pills...destroying the family...are you sure we're not related?


----------



## littlefairywren

BigBeautifulMe said:


> I think I know exactly who you mean, as I've been wondering the same thing. Two weeks and nary a post is strange.



I sent you a pm, hon....



Gingembre said:


> I think I know who you mean too. Hope all is well.



Me too Gingembre, me too


----------



## Rowan

CastingPearls said:


> Stolen pain pills...destroying the family...are you sure we're not related?



Very well might be! lol


----------



## Sensualbbwcurves

What has me sad is how my daughter's father comes @ me with such verbal abuse. It's amazing to me because, you would never think that we were in a relationship and actually loved each other @ one time...so it makes me sad that NOW is what we are ALTHOUGH he's currently in a new relationship living with some girl, he just met...and I am still very much single...he has a deep rooted hate for me! Just sad!!


----------



## CastingPearls

Sensualbbwcurves said:


> What has me sad is how my daughter's father comes @ me with such verbal abuse. It's amazing to me because, you would never think that we were in a relationship and actually loved each other @ one time...so it makes me sad that NOW is what we are ALTHOUGH he's currently in a new relationship living with some girl, he just met...and I am still very much single...he has a deep rooted hate for me! Just sad!!


Often a deeply rooted hate can mean the person never got over you. There's a razor thin line between love and hate. They're not opposites. Indifference is the opposite.


----------



## Mathias

I woke up this morning to hear a friend of my roommate's crying. I hope she's okay.


----------



## DeerVictory

I've been crying a lot lately, and feeling pretty shitty about myself. I've been having a really hard time rationalizing everything. Theoretically, it all makes sense. I can tell myself that I shouldn't feel the way I do because of xyz, but telling myself that doesn't make it hurt less. 

I need a hobby or something, something to take my mind off of it.


----------



## Micara

I'm sad that my daughter is sick! And was crying for me when I was at my mom's. But I'm home now, ready to play Mama Nurse.


----------



## Slamaga

Raegan said:


> I've been crying a lot lately, and feeling pretty shitty about myself. I've been having a really hard time rationalizing everything. Theoretically, it all makes sense. I can tell myself that I shouldn't feel the way I do because of xyz, but telling myself that doesn't make it hurt less.
> 
> I need a hobby or something, something to take my mind off of it.



Maybe writing could help you or maybe creating a project of your own? I did this with a roleplaying activity project. By now, this activity has more than 30 members after only one event!


I'm sad because I'm sure that my best friend thinks I am in love with her. Now, she tries to put a distance between me and her. I know I am really a careful friend but I'm not a lurker or a subtile dating man?!?! I'm not even a good dating man XD. I don't know if she generalize all men because of her relationship that ended a few weeks ago.


----------



## CuppyCakeSSBBW

Two things:

(1) My best friend and her bf broke up. I hate seeing 2 people I love hurting.

(2) I didn't go to the drive-in to see Nightmare tonight, cus it was supposed to rain. It didn't, so I had a boring night for nothing.


----------



## Lamia

reading the story about the homeless good samaritan that was left to die in the street


----------



## GTAFA

There was a news item recently in Toronto about a kid who didn't want to join a gang who was killed in a targetted killing. Although they've arrested a lot of gang members recently the death of an innocent person resisting evil really upsets me.


----------



## MzDeeZyre

Went to the Visitation of a long time friend yesterday. I've known since Sunday that she chose to end her life, however I don't think it really set in until last night. Attending her funeral today and I'm already crying....again. Just wishing I could have been the one person to make the difference.... :really sad:


----------



## littlefairywren

MzDeeZyre said:


> Went to the Visitation of a long time friend yesterday. I've known since Sunday that she chose to end her life, however I don't think it really set in until last night. Attending her funeral today and I'm already crying....again. Just wishing I could have been the one person to make the difference.... :really sad:



Oh, big ((((hugs)))) MzDee


----------



## spiritangel

MzDeeZyre said:


> Went to the Visitation of a long time friend yesterday. I've known since Sunday that she chose to end her life, however I don't think it really set in until last night. Attending her funeral today and I'm already crying....again. Just wishing I could have been the one person to make the difference.... :really sad:



Hugs, hugs and more hugs


----------



## CastingPearls

GTAFA said:


> There was a news item recently in Toronto about a kid who didn't want to join a gang who was killed in a targetted killing. Although they've arrested a lot of gang members recently the death of an innocent person resisting evil really upsets me.


That is very very sad.


----------



## CastingPearls

MzDeeZyre said:


> Went to the Visitation of a long time friend yesterday. I've known since Sunday that she chose to end her life, however I don't think it really set in until last night. Attending her funeral today and I'm already crying....again. Just wishing I could have been the one person to make the difference.... :really sad:


So sorry, MzDee...


----------



## Proner

MzDeeZyre said:


> Went to the Visitation of a long time friend yesterday. I've known since Sunday that she chose to end her life, however I don't think it really set in until last night. Attending her funeral today and I'm already crying....again. Just wishing I could have been the one person to make the difference.... :really sad:



Oh, I'm sorry Mz Deezyre 
*hugs*


----------



## Linda

MzDeeZyre said:


> Went to the Visitation of a long time friend yesterday. I've known since Sunday that she chose to end her life, however I don't think it really set in until last night. Attending her funeral today and I'm already crying....again. Just wishing I could have been the one person to make the difference.... :really sad:



(((Hugs))) I am so sorry.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Rowan said:


> I hate that you have to go through that love...but I will so trade! I have no problems being worked over and tortured physically...it's the emotional that makes me want to just up and die.
> 
> I'll be thinking of you sweetheart *big hugs* and if you would like someone to talk to, feel free to call me. You can PM me for my number if you want *big huge healing hugs*



Thanks .

Oh, I have tons of emotional crap going on too....dealing with being in pain everyday (according to women that have given birth, the pain just from one of the pain disorders I have is worse than natural birth), having to give up so much because of all the complications, living with my mother (she has some major mental illnesses, and is often very cruel to me), etc takes a very hard emotional and mental toll on me. So, I got the whole ball of wax going on, mental, emotional, and physical pain.



Lamia said:


> I hope everything went ok. Sorry to hear you're going through that.



Thanks .

Unfortunately, it went horribly.



luscious_lulu said:


> (((hugs))) Sorry you have to go through this babe!



Thanks so much sweetie!



archivaltype said:


> I lost someone close to my family this weekend. He was a great guy and touched a lot of people.
> We'll miss 'im.



I'm so sorry for your loss.



PhatChk said:


> I am sad that an a FA I met on this site and we had a very awesome friendship. And wanted to make it work but we were just tooo far. Died last night in car accident close to his home in France. I have no way to know if its true or get/give comfort to his friends and family. Don't even know if I have the right to mourn him.



(((HUGS))) I'm so sorry, and of course you have the right to mourn him.



ladle said:


> I am crushed...never in my life have a felt so low. Finally meet the woman of my dreams only to hear she is interested in another guy and 'just wants to stay friends'
> I feel like I am walking about like a zombie. Empty and void of all emotion...
> GUTTED, truly GUTTED



Oh ladle......I'm so sorry! It's her loss for not going for a great guy like you.



HottiMegan said:


> May 19th is the day we schedule a BIG surgery for Max. I'm sad that this will be his 12th time to go under. I am afraid for him every single time. He has aspirated twice in his life. Once it resulted in pneumonia. This surgery will have a bone graft and ear reconstruction. Meaning many ah hours under the knife. i hate it that my little boy has been through so much in his short life. This will be one of two surgeries (at least) in his ear reconstruction. I'm sad about it.



I hope things go well and he heals quickly!



Micara said:


> I'm really sad because my boyfriend and fellow Dims member Weirdo890 broke his ankle today, and is having surgery tomorrow. I'm scared and really, really wish I could be there to take care of him.



I hope he feels better fast!



Your Plump Princess said:


> I'm really sad, to the point of crying [because I am a big ball of fluff.] because one of my closest guyfriends gave me the "Don't Worry About me " Speech. Because apparently, he will be going overseas, and flat out said there is a 50/50 chance he won't come back.
> 
> ..I've known this man for 6-7 years.
> He lives somewhere in NY, I've never been able to visit him, anything.
> I've loved him forever, he's like a brother to me.
> 
> What killed me most was he said "as much as I hate this country, theres still things here I have to protect. Your one of them."
> 
> 
> So far, I've had two cousins, and two other close guyfriends choose to join the military. They joined the Air Force and Navy, Honestly? I'm so sick of the "Don't Worry" shit.



(((HUGS))) to you sweetie! Just try to focus on him getting back safely, or you'll go nuts.



HottiMegan said:


> I slipped and fell at a grocery store about a year and a half ago. I never went to a doctor about it but ever since then i get intense cant walk pain in my left hip (the side i landed on). It flares up for a few days and i'm back to normal. I woke up and had that intense pain. I took 4 advil and can barely sit here without pain. Imagine having to get up and chase after a precocious toddler too. It hurts so badly. I am so kicking myself that i didn't seek medical care right after the fall.



I hope you're feeling a bit better!



CastingPearls said:


> I'm really sad today and hesitate to post but I've been crying about it all day.
> 
> I've been getting extensive dental work done for the past few months. We're nearing the end which is good but I was really looking forward to ONE THING which was getting my teeth bleached after years of smoking. (I quit years ago) and also acid damage from when I was sick. It's been planned and budgeted for a long time and I had to sacrifice a lot to budget it. My appointment has been moved, changed, etc. so many times either because of the dentist office's needs, my own family obligations, or miscommunication.
> As my dentist was finishing up with a small but very painful procedure she told me I was bleeding too much and we'd have to postpone the bleaching again. I realize why and the wisdom of it but I've waited years to repair my smile.
> Meanwhile, every week I visit my elderly father and Grandmother to help out and keep them company for the day. I've switched around several appointments to help them out which I was happy to but tomorrow we were going to celebrate my birthday and they were talking for days about what we'd do, what we'd be having for dinner and I was really looking forward to it. Since my mother and sister died and my husband doesn't grasp the concept of family or celebrations, I've been feeling really lost and unimportant to the people I love the most especially the one day of the year that means something to me.
> 
> So my father called me and said.. Uh..when you come over tomorrow we're having this for dinner. I asked..What happened to having a little party and celebrating my birthday? He said...Oh, I can't be bothered with that.
> 
> I was so hurt that my own father couldn't even be bothered with celebrating my birthday. I make an effort to see them and make sure they're well and need for nothing. I didn't need a big party just an acknowledgment from the people I love that I mattered especially since I don't even expect a fucking card from my own husband.



I'm so, so sorry that you're having to go through all of that. I completely understand the entire birthday thing. I can't remember the last time mine was celebrated (and I'm not talking about something big, just something).



littlefairywren said:


> I am sad, because I am missing someone dear to my heart. The internet makes us all seem so close, till one of us disappears. Where are you my girl?



I'm here now my sweet birdie! Barely here, but I'm here! lol Trying to slog through all the old posts .



BigBeautifulMe said:


> I think I know exactly who you mean, as I've been wondering the same thing. Two weeks and nary a post is strange.



Ya'll are too sweet for missing me!



Rowan said:


> My brother came so close to getting into a rehab program and getting help...then they didnt have a bed and so he's just back at my dad's and using my dad and younger brother for what he can. He's supposed to be calling every day to see if a bed has opened up. He hasnt been doing that, hasnt been paying his bail bondsman for being out of jail, back to using my family for everything he can...and Im tired of it.
> 
> I'm going to give him an ultimatum since my parents dont seem to have the heart to, that I will be calling the rehab place every evening to find out if he called to see if they had a bed that day, and if he hasn't, I'm calling his bail bondsman. He has a choice and it's going to be his to make and I'm going to force his hand to do it. My name is on the lease with my dad and I'm not going to have my brother living there endangering himself, my father, other brother and his wife and their unborn child. So... Jail or Rehab. His choice. I am tired of sitting here waiting for the call that he got himself killed in some bad drug deal or some other bs. So it's jail or rehab, like I said...his choice. *sigh*



Oh Rowan....I'm so sorry to hear this. I hope things turn around for all of you and he decides to start making the right choices so that he can turn his life around, and not drag everyone into the mess he's created.



Raegan said:


> I've been crying a lot lately, and feeling pretty shitty about myself. I've been having a really hard time rationalizing everything. Theoretically, it all makes sense. I can tell myself that I shouldn't feel the way I do because of xyz, but telling myself that doesn't make it hurt less.
> 
> I need a hobby or something, something to take my mind off of it.



(((HUGS))) sweetie! I hope things become brighter for you soon.



MzDeeZyre said:


> Went to the Visitation of a long time friend yesterday. I've known since Sunday that she chose to end her life, however I don't think it really set in until last night. Attending her funeral today and I'm already crying....again. Just wishing I could have been the one person to make the difference.... :really sad:



I'm so sorry for your loss.


----------



## CastingPearls

That there is a page on Facebook called Fat Girls Aren't Real. 
If one doesn't have a preference, fine, but damn, rage?
Live and let live. 
This is so much more than hate or disgust. 
This is denying human beings the right to respect.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Report it, Pearl. That's what I'm doing (and all my friends as well).


----------



## CastingPearls

BigBeautifulMe said:


> Report it, Pearl. That's what I'm doing (and all my friends as well).


Oh I did before I even posted here and emailed friends to do so as well.

It's a qualifier for bias/hate speech.


----------



## Captain Save

Someone who means a lot to me is having a hard time right now, and there's not much I can do to fix it.


----------



## spiritangel

CastingPearls said:


> That there is a page on Facebook called Fat Girls Aren't Real.
> If one doesn't have a preference, fine, but damn, rage?
> Live and let live.
> This is so much more than hate or disgust.
> This is denying human beings the right to respect.




hmm I just poked myself to find out if I was a figment of my own imagination and was really skinny? but just saw myself as fat? but nope still got all my jiggles and curves


----------



## CastingPearls

spiritangel said:


> hmm I just poked myself to find out if I was a figment of my own imagination and was really skinny? but just saw myself as fat? but nope still got all my jiggles and curves


It's actually 'Fat Girls Aren't Real PEOPLE' but I wasn't able to edit it in time.


----------



## spiritangel

huggles I was just attempting some humour out of the situation sorry pearl :blush:


----------



## Your Plump Princess

Just when my friend had gotten her life completely on track, one thing gives out and the whole thing suffers.


----------



## Tanuki

I came out to my dad about being trans... Tough times right now, very tough.


----------



## OneWickedAngel

T-Bear said:


> I came out to my dad about being trans... Tough times right now, very tough.



:wubu::wubu::wubu:*{{{{{{{{{{ Oh Kim! }}}}}}}}}} *:wubu::wubu::wubu:​
It may get a little worse before it gets better but, IT WILL GET BETTER. Just keep remembering we love you and we've got your back.


----------



## Tanuki

OneWickedAngel said:


> :wubu::wubu::wubu:*{{{{{{{{{{ Oh Kim! }}}}}}}}}} *:wubu::wubu::wubu:​
> It may get a little worse before it gets better but, IT WILL GET BETTER. Just keep remembering we love you and we've got your back.



Thank you so SO much, that honestly means so very much to me thank you! xxx


----------



## littlefairywren

T-Bear said:


> I came out to my dad about being trans... Tough times right now, very tough.



Big ((((hugs)))) T-Bear! I hope it is not too rough a ride, and you both come out stronger together at the end.


----------



## spiritangel

T-Bear said:


> I came out to my dad about being trans... Tough times right now, very tough.



What amazing courage you have, and a strong inner core of strength, the truth no matter how painful is always better than living a lie, you are an amazing soul and an inspiration I am sure to others who are going through a simmilar journey

Big squishy hugs it will get better with time


----------



## CastingPearls

T-Bear said:


> I came out to my dad about being trans... Tough times right now, very tough.


((((((T-Bear)))))) Be strong. It is within you. You have a lot of support here, FWIW.


----------



## CastingPearls

My grandmother and I are the only women left in our family. We lost my mom, my aunt and my sister in so short a time. It's devastating to bury your own children. My only uncle will have nothing to do with any of us so that only adds to her sadness. She'll be 86 this month and is getting forgetful. Even forgetting her English. Thank God I understand some Polish. 

She lives an hour away and I see her nearly every week. However that means I have to see a brother who is usually stoned and either catatonic or combative and my father who's indulging in elder crankiness, depression, and sitting in a dark house all day yelling about why there are so many lights. Also attacking me for anything I say, or even don't say. Yes, he even rides my ass for being TOO quiet. I love them all and put up with it for one day a week but I worry about her.

She's using a walker now, and soon a little scooter. With my chronic fatigue, it's difficult to get her out and about. I would like her to live with us but she thinks she owes it to my father to stay with him. I can't take them both, don't want to deal with his crap on a daily basis and refuse to take my brother. I need to get my OWN life in order anyway.

So to make a short story long.....<sigh> I did not call my grandmother for Mother's Day. I thought about it all day. I called or emailed all my friends who are mothers and wished them a Happy Mother's Day. I thought about my own mom and how much I missed her. I reminisced about the good times. It was heavy on my heart to call, but I was just too tired and discouraged to fight. 

We talked today and all she did was beg me to come see her and of course I will, but no matter how positive a spin I put on this, it will always go back to the same toxicity..the same negativity. I love my family and won't cut them off but I don't want to have to be subjected to abuse every time I see them.


----------



## Weirdo890

T-Bear said:


> I came out to my dad about being trans... Tough times right now, very tough.



*Gives you a great big bear hug* You can get through this. There is always a light at the end of the tunnel. Like everyone else has said, you have the support of everyone here. :happy:


----------



## Weirdo890

CastingPearls said:


> My grandmother and I are the only women left in our family. We lost my mom, my aunt and my sister in so short a time. It's devastating to bury your own children. My only uncle will have nothing to do with any of us so that only adds to her sadness. She'll be 86 this month and is getting forgetful. Even forgetting her English. Thank God I understand some Polish.
> 
> She lives an hour away and I see her nearly every week. However that means I have to see a brother who is usually stoned and either catatonic or combative and my father who's indulging in elder crankiness, depression, and sitting in a dark house all day yelling about why there are so many lights. Also attacking me for anything I say, or even don't say. Yes, he even rides my ass for being TOO quiet. I love them all and put up with it for one day a week but I worry about her.
> 
> She's using a walker now, and soon a little scooter. With my chronic fatigue, it's difficult to get her out and about. I would like her to live with us but she thinks she owes it to my father to stay with him. I can't take them both, don't want to deal with his crap on a daily basis and refuse to take my brother. I need to get my OWN life in order anyway.
> 
> So to make a short story long.....<sigh> I did not call my grandmother for Mother's Day. I thought about it all day. I called or emailed all my friends who are mothers and wished them a Happy Mother's Day. I thought about my own mom and how much I missed her. I reminisced about the good times. It was heavy on my heart to call, but I was just too tired and discouraged to fight.
> 
> We talked today and all she did was beg me to come see her and of course I will, but no matter how positive a spin I put on this, it will always go back to the same toxicity..the same negativity. I love my family and won't cut them off but I don't want to have to be subjected to abuse every time I see them.



*Gives you a big bear hug* I'm sorry you have to endure such hard times. You can always talk to us on here. We have your back.


----------



## Proner

The fact that my Dad only see that I gain less money in my new job situation... Damn I love my new job and feel hundered times better than at the old one and I told him but it's always "You settle with less"


----------



## Weirdo890

One of my favorite artists has died today. Frank Frazetta may not have been a fine artist, but he had far more talented than many of them. He was, and continues to be, an inspiration. I can only hope to draw half as well as he did someday.


----------



## Paquito

T-Bear said:


> I came out to my dad about being trans... Tough times right now, very tough.



We're all here for you! You are an incredible, strong person and always hold your head up high. :happy:


----------



## BeautifulBigD

I'm feeling icky today. My throat is so sore, and I'm having chest congestion, and feel weak and tired. I'm going to take some medicine that will hopefully help because I don't want to end up back in the hospital. Also my boyfriend is at work so he cannot be here to cuddle me and make me feel better


----------



## Linda

I am sad that my friend has so many rules for herself that she trys to impose them onto me. When I don't follow them she get's irritated. Makes me sad because she can't enjoy life more.


----------



## spiritangel

Huggles pearl remind me to teach you how to do some energy protection and cleanising it will help loads with all of that





Proner said:


> The fact that my Dad only see that I gain less money in my new job situation... Damn I love my new job and feel hundered times better than at the old one and I told him but it's always "You settle with less"



hugs its better to do something you love for less money, depends on his values but dont let him get you down, it takes courage to live the life we want and not what other people expect of us

Hugs


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

T-Bear said:


> I came out to my dad about being trans... Tough times right now, very tough.



(((HUGS))) to you sweetie! I have a cousin that's going through that, so I sorta know what it can be like family wise (of course each family is different), but in most cases, after getting used to the idea, most are accepting. It probably took time for you to come to terms with your identity, so give them a bit of time to get used to it too.  Good luck and we're always here if you need to vent, cry, or anything.



CastingPearls said:


> My grandmother and I are the only women left in our family. We lost my mom, my aunt and my sister in so short a time. It's devastating to bury your own children. My only uncle will have nothing to do with any of us so that only adds to her sadness. She'll be 86 this month and is getting forgetful. Even forgetting her English. Thank God I understand some Polish.
> 
> She lives an hour away and I see her nearly every week. However that means I have to see a brother who is usually stoned and either catatonic or combative and my father who's indulging in elder crankiness, depression, and sitting in a dark house all day yelling about why there are so many lights. Also attacking me for anything I say, or even don't say. Yes, he even rides my ass for being TOO quiet. I love them all and put up with it for one day a week but I worry about her.
> 
> She's using a walker now, and soon a little scooter. With my chronic fatigue, it's difficult to get her out and about. I would like her to live with us but she thinks she owes it to my father to stay with him. I can't take them both, don't want to deal with his crap on a daily basis and refuse to take my brother. I need to get my OWN life in order anyway.
> 
> So to make a short story long.....<sigh> I did not call my grandmother for Mother's Day. I thought about it all day. I called or emailed all my friends who are mothers and wished them a Happy Mother's Day. I thought about my own mom and how much I missed her. I reminisced about the good times. It was heavy on my heart to call, but I was just too tired and discouraged to fight.
> 
> We talked today and all she did was beg me to come see her and of course I will, but no matter how positive a spin I put on this, it will always go back to the same toxicity..the same negativity. I love my family and won't cut them off but I don't want to have to be subjected to abuse every time I see them.



I'm so sorry to hear this Pearl. Dealing with family and your own emotional needs can be one of the hardest things to do.



Proner said:


> The fact that my Dad only see that I gain less money in my new job situation... Damn I love my new job and feel hundered times better than at the old one and I told him but it's always "You settle with less"



(((HUGS))) to you Mister! You've got a good head on your shoulders and know what's important to you, so just go with your instincts, not what your dad thinks is important.



BeautifulBigD said:


> I'm feeling icky today. My throat is so sore, and I'm having chest congestion, and feel weak and tired. I'm going to take some medicine that will hopefully help because I don't want to end up back in the hospital. Also my boyfriend is at work so he cannot be here to cuddle me and make me feel better



I hope you start feeling better soon and stay out of the hospital!!!


----------



## JerseyGirl07093

T-Bear said:


> I came out to my dad about being trans... Tough times right now, very tough.



I can imagine that the news would be somewhat hard and possibly confusing for even the most open and tolerant parent to take. Give him some time. Ultimately, though, you have to live your life for you and not to please other people. ((HUG)) It will get better, keep believing that.


----------



## littlefairywren

CastingPearls said:


> My grandmother and I are the only women left in our family. We lost my mom, my aunt and my sister in so short a time. It's devastating to bury your own children. My only uncle will have nothing to do with any of us so that only adds to her sadness. She'll be 86 this month and is getting forgetful. Even forgetting her English. Thank God I understand some Polish.
> 
> She lives an hour away and I see her nearly every week. However that means I have to see a brother who is usually stoned and either catatonic or combative and my father who's indulging in elder crankiness, depression, and sitting in a dark house all day yelling about why there are so many lights. Also attacking me for anything I say, or even don't say. Yes, he even rides my ass for being TOO quiet. I love them all and put up with it for one day a week but I worry about her.
> 
> She's using a walker now, and soon a little scooter. With my chronic fatigue, it's difficult to get her out and about. I would like her to live with us but she thinks she owes it to my father to stay with him. I can't take them both, don't want to deal with his crap on a daily basis and refuse to take my brother. I need to get my OWN life in order anyway.
> 
> So to make a short story long.....<sigh> I did not call my grandmother for Mother's Day. I thought about it all day. I called or emailed all my friends who are mothers and wished them a Happy Mother's Day. I thought about my own mom and how much I missed her. I reminisced about the good times. It was heavy on my heart to call, but I was just too tired and discouraged to fight.
> 
> We talked today and all she did was beg me to come see her and of course I will, but no matter how positive a spin I put on this, it will always go back to the same toxicity..the same negativity. I love my family and won't cut them off but I don't want to have to be subjected to abuse every time I see them.



It is so true....you can choose your friends, but not your family. I know how hard family can be, and the heartache they can cause. ((((Hugs))))


----------



## Tanuki

Wow, I am absolutely speechless... The love and support of you all has blown me away...

Just .. thank you so much hehe, the support and encouragement means the world to me



littlefairywren said:


> Big ((((hugs)))) T-Bear! I hope it is not too rough a ride, and you both come out stronger together at the end.



*huge hugs!* Thank you, I hope so, I think we might



spiritangel said:


> What amazing courage you have, and a strong inner core of strength, the truth no matter how painful is always better than living a lie, you are an amazing soul and an inspiration I am sure to others who are going through a simmilar journey
> 
> Big squishy hugs it will get better with time



*big squishy hugs for you too* That is an extremely beautiful complement but I'm not strong or courageous hehe, this hole time I have been so scared, I am still scared terrified but hearing words like this gives you so much strength I could take on the world



CastingPearls said:


> ((((((T-Bear)))))) Be strong. It is within you. You have a lot of support here, FWIW.



Thank you hun, its your support that makes me stronger 



Weirdo890 said:


> *Gives you a great big bear hug* You can get through this. There is always a light at the end of the tunnel. Like everyone else has said, you have the support of everyone here. :happy:



*great big bear hugs!* Thank you, yes I will focus on the light!



free2beme04 said:


> We're all here for you! You are an incredible, strong person and always hold your head up high. :happy:



Thank you so much, I feel for the first time that I actually can hold my head up high!



MizzSnakeBite said:


> (((HUGS))) to you sweetie! I have a cousin that's going through that, so I sorta know what it can be like family wise (of course each family is different), but in most cases, after getting used to the idea, most are accepting. It probably took time for you to come to terms with your identity, so give them a bit of time to get used to it too.  Good luck and we're always here if you need to vent, cry, or anything.



*hugs!* yes yes that is very true thank you! hehe and I shall indeed vent and cry!



JerseyGirl07093 said:


> I can imagine that the news would be somewhat hard and possibly confusing for even the most open and tolerant parent to take. Give him some time. Ultimately, though, you have to live your life for you and not to please other people. ((HUG)) It will get better, keep believing that.



*hug* yeah I think he needs a lot of time, as did I, and thanks for saying that about living my life.. I have always tried to simply make everyone else smile but I realise I need to just be myself now!

Wow, again thank you so much for all the love and understanding... 

Thank you

Kimberly xxx


----------



## spiritangel

T-Bear said:


> Wow, I am absolutely speechless... The love and support of you all has blown me away...
> 
> Just .. thank you so much hehe, the support and encouragement means the world to me
> 
> 
> 
> *huge hugs!* Thank you, I hope so, I think we might
> 
> 
> 
> *big squishy hugs for you too* That is an extremely beautiful complement but im strong or courageous hehe, this hole time I have been so scared, I am still scared terrified but hearing words like this gives you so much strength I could take on the world
> 
> 
> 
> Thank you hun, its your support that makes me stronger
> 
> 
> 
> *great big bear hugs!* Thank you, yes I will focus on the light!
> 
> 
> 
> Thank you so much, I feel for the first time that I actually can hold my head up high!
> 
> 
> 
> *hugs!* yes yes that is very true thank you! hehe and I shall indeed vent and cry!
> 
> 
> 
> *hug* yeah I think he needs a lot of time, as did I, and thanks for saying that about living my life.. I have always tried to simply make everyone else smile but I realise I need to just be myself now!
> 
> Wow, again thank you so much for all the love and understanding...
> 
> Thank you
> 
> Kimberly xxx



Hugs Kimberly I think true courage isnt about not being scared but is being scared acknowledging it and going forward inspite of the fear, I am glad my words helped give you strength


----------



## Your Plump Princess

Unrequited Love.

Especially since I've spent the last two days with my friend and her new Boy Toy, and he is the same 'type' as the guy I have fallen for. So when I watch them make out, It's like watching my crush-who-I-Know-I-Don't-Have-a-chance-in-hell-with, make out with my best friend. 


It just....kills my insides.


----------



## nettie

T-Bear said:


> I came out to my dad about being trans... Tough times right now, very tough.



I think you are absolutely amazing and courageous. Sending you strength and peace and much love.


----------



## Tanuki

nettie said:


> I think you are absolutely amazing and courageous. Sending you strength and peace and much love.



Thank you so much nettie, I say it again I'm not strong at all but you and everyone else here gives me so much strength... thank you!


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

I wasn't able to sleep at all last night, and now I have a bitch of a migraine.


----------



## Micara

MizzSnakeBite said:


> I wasn't able to sleep at all last night, and now I have a bitch of a migraine.



I hate nights like that.  I hope that you feel better quickly!


----------



## spiritangel

huggles MizzSnakeBite and lots of empathy I hate migrains, hope you get some rest and stuff soon


I am sad because I am loosing faith in the male species as a whole at the moment


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Micara said:


> I hate nights like that.  I hope that you feel better quickly!





spiritangel said:


> huggles MizzSnakeBite and lots of empathy I hate migrains, hope you get some rest and stuff soon
> 
> 
> I am sad because I am loosing faith in the male species as a whole at the moment



Thank ya girls . I think I'm going to have to take an extra Lortab.

Spiritangel, I often feel the same way, but then I notice some guy here that's kind, and it gives me hope that maybe some day I'll find someone to spend the rest of my life with.


----------



## littlefairywren

MizzSnakeBite said:


> I wasn't able to sleep at all last night, and now I have a bitch of a migraine.



*Hugs* Momma Bird! You feel better soon, my sweet!


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

littlefairywren said:


> *Hugs* Momma Bird! You feel better soon, my sweet!



Thank ya my wee chicklet! :wubu:


----------



## spiritangel

MizzSnakeBite said:


> Thank ya girls . I think I'm going to have to take an extra Lortab.
> 
> Spiritangel, I often feel the same way, but then I notice some guy here that's kind, and it gives me hope that maybe some day I'll find someone to spend the rest of my life with.




hugs yeah me to just had two mega mega creeps in two days I will recover, I just dont understand why anyone would choose to be like that in life


----------



## balletguy

Pretty bad hangover from yesterday...


----------



## HottiMegan

I have a stomach virus that is making my insides feel like they're on fire. To top it off, i can't stay in bed all day today because they're spraying the building for pests. All i want is to curl up in bed. (was up all night with this darned virus) I'm so weak and tired and have no place to curl up and recover


----------



## CastingPearls

HottiMegan said:


> I have a stomach virus that is making my insides feel like they're on fire. To top it off, i can't stay in bed all day today because they're spraying the building for pests. All i want is to curl up in bed. (was up all night with this darned virus) I'm so weak and tired and have no place to curl up and recover


I just saw an interesting thing on a doctor program that a sure-fire way of knowing your home or building has pest infestation is stomach or intestinal symptoms.


----------



## HottiMegan

We saw no indicator of any bugs in our apartment but now they're sprayed like crazy and i'm on the mend. Still weak as crazy. I'm the only one who got sick too.


----------



## mossystate

MizzSnakeBite said:


> Thank ya my wee chicklet! :wubu:



Hope this finds you in less pain, and somewhere cool and dark.


----------



## MisticalMisty

MzDeeZyre said:


> Went to the Visitation of a long time friend yesterday. I've known since Sunday that she chose to end her life, however I don't think it really set in until last night. Attending her funeral today and I'm already crying....again. Just wishing I could have been the one person to make the difference.... :really sad:



I am so very sorry. I hope that you can find peace soon. Empty inbox if you need it.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

spiritangel said:


> hugs yeah me to just had two mega mega creeps in two days I will recover, I just dont understand why anyone would choose to be like that in life



I don't either... Hopefully some day someone will bop them on the head, and then they'll straighten up their act. lol 



balletguy said:


> Pretty bad hangover from yesterday...



Say no to scotch! 



HottiMegan said:


> I have a stomach virus that is making my insides feel like they're on fire. To top it off, i can't stay in bed all day today because they're spraying the building for pests. All i want is to curl up in bed. (was up all night with this darned virus) I'm so weak and tired and have no place to curl up and recover



Hope you're feeling better today.



mossystate said:


> Hope this finds you in less pain, and somewhere cool and dark.



Thank ya dear.  The weather gods must have listened to you, since it was a cool and dark day. But then we all know what happens when someone doesn't listen to Mizz Mossy.


----------



## Weirdo890

HottiMegan said:


> I have a stomach virus that is making my insides feel like they're on fire. To top it off, i can't stay in bed all day today because they're spraying the building for pests. All i want is to curl up in bed. (was up all night with this darned virus) I'm so weak and tired and have no place to curl up and recover



*Big bear hugs for you* I hope you feel better soon. It's no fun to be sick.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Weirdo890 said:


> *Big bear hugs for you* I hope you feel better soon. It's no fun to be sick.



By the way, how's the ankle doing, Gimpy??


----------



## Weirdo890

MizzSnakeBite said:


> By the way, how's the ankle doing, Gimpy??



It's alright. Although I do like my knee-scooter, it doesn't make up for my lack of full mobility. I get tired so easily, and today being a hot day didn't help. 

I guess that's why I'm feeling a bit down.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Weirdo890 said:


> It's alright. Although I do like my knee-scooter, it doesn't make up for my lack of full mobility. I get tired so easily, and today being a hot day didn't help.
> 
> I guess that's why I'm feeling a bit down.



  

I hope you heal quickly, Eric. It's wearing when you feel like crap, and you must save your strength for when your lady comes to see you.


----------



## balletguy

My cell phone broke in half today...


----------



## spiritangel

Weirdo890 said:


> It's alright. Although I do like my knee-scooter, it doesn't make up for my lack of full mobility. I get tired so easily, and today being a hot day didn't help.
> 
> I guess that's why I'm feeling a bit down.



huggles you are much loved, and betting that your gonna get a phone call that will cheer you up at some point


----------



## Bearsy

Just about everything right now :/


----------



## Linda

Bearsy said:


> Just about everything right now :/



((((Hugs))))


----------



## Proner

It was last game of the soccer's season today and we finished second because of the goal average... we were leader since few months, that's too bad to lose it on the last day


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

I'm sad that Proner's team lost. I was going to buy that calender with the risque pic of him in it. 


 = not able to look at partially nude Proner


----------



## Gingembre

Phone stopped recognising sim card. Did system upgrade to phone. Could not back phone up because failure to recognise sim meant it wouldn't get past that screen and turn on properly. Phone now works BUT all my messages are gone.  I only keep texts from certain people and the conversations showing the text both ways really told my story with a few people. Now they are gone


----------



## HottiMegan

I just saw that Ronnie James Dio died. I was hoping he would pull through from stomach cancer. Sad. We're gonna have to watch the Pick of Destiny to see him again.


----------



## SuperSizedAngie

Actually, pretty much everything is right now. 

I wish I had someplace to escape to. Or someone I could call, but my job rather forces isolation on me, and thus, at times like these, I have nobody to turn to.


----------



## rellis10

Sore throat and headache getting worse with a job interview in less that two days....oh joy.


----------



## Surlysomething

This story.


Atrocious.


----------



## rellis10

Surlysomething said:


> This story.
> 
> 
> Atrocious.



There are some awful people out there, makes you sick sometimes.  I hope this guy can get back to a normal life after such an experience.


----------



## Power_Metal_Kitsune

1. The abuse of bettas, who have to live in those death trap cups at pet 
stores.

2. The death of Ronnie James Dio.

3. Sports teams going into dialysis centers trying to sell unsold tickets to dying and chronically ill kidney patients. (This was done at the first dialysis center I attended. I now have a kidney transplant, but I could be back on dialysis one day and I wouldn't like being hit up to buy tickets while I am trying to stay alive, as measly as the quality of life is/was on dialysis...for me, anyway.)


----------



## Surlysomething

rellis10 said:


> There are some awful people out there, makes you sick sometimes.  I hope this guy can get back to a normal life after such an experience.




I doubt he'll ever be the same. The brain damage is extensive..


He's *safe* and getting the proper care now...thankfully.


----------



## Power_Metal_Kitsune

1. The abuse of bettas, who have to live in those death trap cups at pet 
stores.

2. The death of Ronnie James Dio.

3. Sports teams going into dialysis centers trying to sell unsold tickets to dying and chronically ill kidney patients. (This was done at the first dialysis center I attended. I now have a kidney transplant, but I could be back on dialysis one day and I wouldn't like being hit up to buy tickets while I am trying to stay alive, as measly as the quality of life is/was on dialysis...for me, anyway.) This is sick and wrong. People are there to live, not buy stuff. If they can sell tickets, why can't Wendy's sell day-old burgers? Or Mary Kay sell lipstick colors that weren't popular? Or FYE sell unsold Hanson CD's?

Where do we draw the line?


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

SuperSizedAngie said:


> Actually, pretty much everything is right now.
> 
> I wish I had someplace to escape to. Or someone I could call, but my job rather forces isolation on me, and thus, at times like these, I have nobody to turn to.



Hugs to you sweetie! I hope things start improving for you.



rellis10 said:


> Sore throat and headache getting worse with a job interview in less that two days....oh joy.



Crap! I hope you get better quickly!



Surlysomething said:


> This story.
> 
> 
> Atrocious.



  

People can really suck.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

I Spent $26 on Fancy Panties yesterday. Only to find out when I tried them on today, only one pair fits. Blown Money on Nothin'


----------



## Fluffy51888

A friend of mine lost her boyfriend in a car accident this weekend. My heart just breaks for her. I can't imagine finally finding the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, and then losing them.


----------



## PhatChk

I dont know if my mood changes with the weather. (lol ) I feel very lonley lately. And it feels all my friends are busy with their life. Is too selfish of me to ask for some attention. I feel I cant help feeling this bad.


----------



## balletguy

It's raining....boo I have tickets to the Phillies game and it looks like it will get calledif it keeps raining.


----------



## Tanuki

I want to buy some new female clothes but every time I go to do it I'm filled with anxiety, I feel like I don't deserve nice things and that I shouldn't spend money on myself... its getting me down a little...


----------



## Nutty

T-Bear said:


> I want to buy some new female clothes but every time I go to do it I'm filled with anxiety, I feel like I don't deserve nice things and that I shouldn't spend money on myself... its getting me down a little...



aw you shouldn't feel like that . Everyone deserves the finest things in life!


----------



## Surlysomething

Fluffy51888 said:


> A friend of mine lost her boyfriend in a car accident this weekend. My heart just breaks for her. I can't imagine finally finding the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, and then losing them.



That's so sad. Sorry to hear about your friend.


Life is too short.


----------



## PhatChk

T-Bear said:


> I want to buy some new female clothes but every time I go to do it I'm filled with anxiety, I feel like I don't deserve nice things and that I shouldn't spend money on myself... its getting me down a little...



You should never feel that way! Try shopping online first until you get used to if you like. If you live closer I would go with you and help you pick out clothe and anything else you needed. It better with friends ^_^.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

T-Bear said:


> I want to buy some new female clothes but every time I go to do it I'm filled with anxiety, I feel like I don't deserve nice things and that I shouldn't spend money on myself... its getting me down a little...



Rip off that anxiety like a bandaid; FAST! Just go and do it, don't think about it! You do deserve it!


----------



## GTAFA

I seem to have lost touch with someone who was my best friend for a big chunk of my youth. We drifted apart in our 20s and 30s, reconnecting for awhile since the millennium. I last saw him in 2006.

Oh well, I hope he's okay, wherever he is.


----------



## snuggletiger

and no leads on the roomie  sad story.


----------



## Nutty

I'm a dumbass


----------



## CastingPearls

Nutty said:


> I'm a dumbass


No you're not. Seriously, Nutty.


----------



## Micara

Nutty said:


> I'm a dumbass



No, Nutty, YOU'RE not. But I can see a few people who are.


----------



## Gingembre

Oh god...just watched the season finale of Brothers and Sisters


----------



## spiritangel

that a dress I fell in lust with on ebay is 4" to small for my hips :m


----------



## Weirdo890

Nutty said:


> I'm a dumbass



You made one tiny mistake. That does not make you a dumbass. It makes you human. Buddy, if you ever want someone to talk to, come my way. I've got a hug for you. :happy:


----------



## Weirdo890

I'm sad to see that even here on Dims, we have folks who cannot show someone a little respect, even if they did something silly.


----------



## littlefairywren

Fluffy51888 said:


> A friend of mine lost her boyfriend in a car accident this weekend. My heart just breaks for her. I can't imagine finally finding the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, and then losing them.



Oh hon, I totally missed this. I am so sorry for your friend....sometimes life makes no sense


----------



## Tanuki

Nutty said:


> aw you shouldn't feel like that . Everyone deserves the finest things in life!



Thank you nutty that's really nice!



PhatChk said:


> You should never feel that way! Try shopping online first until you get used to if you like. If you live closer I would go with you and help you pick out clothe and anything else you needed. It better with friends ^_^.



Awww thank you! that's really sweet!



MizzSnakeBite said:


> Rip off that anxiety like a bandaid; FAST! Just go and do it, don't think about it! You do deserve it!



hehehe good advice thank you!

OK so after reading comments and chatting to a couple of friends I decided to pick up a couple of bits online and feel great about it!

I got a cool gothy skirt and a looovely 50s type dress I plan on wearing to a LGBT Pride event! yay!


----------



## Your Plump Princess

My Depression has returned, It's The only one I know will always be with me.


-Sigh-


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

T-Bear said:


> OK so after reading comments and chatting to a couple of friends I decided to pick up a couple of bits online and feel great about it!
> 
> I got a cool gothy skirt and a looovely 50s type dress I plan on wearing to a LGBT Pride event! yay!



Good for you! :bow:



Your Plump Princess said:


> My Depression has returned, It's The only one I know will always be with me.
> 
> 
> -Sigh-



I'm sorry to hear that. Have you talked to anyone about it (doctor, therapist, etc)?


----------



## Your Plump Princess

I Don't have health insurance. So I've nobody but myself. [Who likes to play counseler for everyone else, but is a real bitch when it comes to talking to herself.. heh. ]

I never know if it's true depression or more of my BPD. My BPD itself confuses me, but I'll survive to see the many suns arising.


----------



## BBW Goddess Anna

A friend of mine at age 23 decided that blowing his head off with a shotgun was a good idea. I have never felt this confused about death before. Never knowing why, and never knowing if I had just reached out a little more that he may still be alive. That is what is making me sad.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Your Plump Princess said:


> I Don't have health insurance. So I've nobody but myself. [Who likes to play counseler for everyone else, but is a real bitch when it comes to talking to herself.. heh. ]
> 
> I never know if it's true depression or more of my BPD. My BPD itself confuses me, but I'll survive to see the many suns arising.



You can still get mental health help, even though you don't have insurance.  You might have to make some calls, and check around, but it's available. Unfortunately, low to no-cost mental health help is often so hidden that people don't even know it's available. 

Good luck!

http://www.mhawisconsin.org/Content/information_and_assistance.asp

http://mentalhealth.samhsa.gov/


----------



## DJ_S

right now and for a while...

Getting an answer. The silence or lack of response, I guess that is the answer.
It would be nice to find out what others think, just so that you can move on.


----------



## Lamia

Your Plump Princess said:


> I Don't have health insurance. So I've nobody but myself. [Who likes to play counseler for everyone else, but is a real bitch when it comes to talking to herself.. heh. ]
> 
> I never know if it's true depression or more of my BPD. My BPD itself confuses me, but I'll survive to see the many suns arising.



I'm sad to hear that you're sad.


----------



## Lamia

BBW Goddess Anna said:


> A friend of mine at age 23 decided that blowing his head off with a shotgun was a good idea. I have never felt this confused about death before. Never knowing why, and never knowing if I had just reached out a little more that he may still be alive. That is what is making me sad.



I am sad to hear that Anna. Don't beat yourself up.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

BBW Goddess Anna said:


> A friend of mine at age 23 decided that blowing his head off with a shotgun was a good idea. I have never felt this confused about death before. Never knowing why, and never knowing if I had just reached out a little more that he may still be alive. That is what is making me sad.


I'm so sorry for your loss, and as Lamia said, Try not to beat yourself up.


----------



## spiritangel

Big squishy hugs to all of you they are certainly needed


Anna you cannot beat yourself up, my heart goes out to you loosing anybody is hard loosing someone that way is one of the hardest things to find a way through


YPP that totally sux, please take care of yourself

DJ_S sometimes answers take a little time and it often can depend on the question


again hugs to you all


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

BBW Goddess Anna said:


> A friend of mine at age 23 decided that blowing his head off with a shotgun was a good idea. I have never felt this confused about death before. Never knowing why, and never knowing if I had just reached out a little more that he may still be alive. That is what is making me sad.



I'm so sorry for your loss.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

MizzSnakeBite said:


> You can still get mental health help, even though you don't have insurance.  You might have to make some calls, and check around, but it's available. Unfortunately, low to no-cost mental health help is often so hidden that people don't even know it's available.
> 
> Good luck!
> 
> http://www.mhawisconsin.org/Content/information_and_assistance.asp
> 
> http://mentalhealth.samhsa.gov/



Oh, also, this might seem weird, but you might also think of calling a homeless shelter. Since many homeless people have mental health issues, homeless shelters often are partnered up with no to low-cost mental health clinics, or will know of low-cost mental health resources.


----------



## littlefairywren

He chose another, and now my heart is hurting


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

He's a moron, LFW. You are sweet and smart and funny and beautiful! He's obviously blind.


----------



## spiritangel

littlefairywren said:


> He chose another, and now my heart is hurting



oh lfw I am sooo sorry big squishy hugs,  what a fool he is to not see the amazing woman he had before him


----------



## Mathias

Nutty said:


> I'm a dumbass



No you aren't. Don't let certain people get you down.


----------



## CastingPearls

littlefairywren said:


> He chose another, and now my heart is hurting


So sorry, sweetie....his loss.


----------



## nettie

I've been short on time for visiting the boards lately, what with work, end of the school year events, and travel, but I just wanted to send out hugs and warm thoughts to everyone who has shared their sadness and tragedies.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

littlefairywren said:


> He chose another, and now my heart is hurting



My sweet, sweet chicklet.  I'm so, so sorry. I know no words will take away the pain, but you are a sweet, sassy, funny, beautiful soul, and I KNOW there's someone out there that will truly appreciate how wonderful you are.

Big Momma Bird (((HUGS))) to you, my wee chicklet. 








 

I wanna peck his face off.


----------



## littlefairywren

BigBeautifulMe said:


> He's a moron, LFW. You are sweet and smart and funny and beautiful! He's obviously blind.



Thank you BBM, you lovely girl!



spiritangel said:


> oh lfw I am sooo sorry big squishy hugs,  what a fool he is to not see the amazing woman he had before him



Hugs to you, spiritangel 



CastingPearls said:


> So sorry, sweetie....his loss.



Thanks CP!



MizzSnakeBite said:


> My sweet, sweet chicklet.  I'm so, so sorry. I know no words will take away the pain, but you are a sweet, sassy, funny, beautiful soul, and I KNOW there's someone out there that will truly appreciate how wonderful you are.
> 
> Big Momma Bird (((HUGS))) to you, my wee chicklet.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I wanna peck his face off.



Oh Momma Bird....thank you so much. It hurts like hell, and yes....you peck his face off, slow!

I love your parrot flavoured huggies :happy:


----------



## BigCutieClaudia

BBW Goddess Anna said:


> A friend of mine at age 23 decided that blowing his head off with a shotgun was a good idea. I have never felt this confused about death before. Never knowing why, and never knowing if I had just reached out a little more that he may still be alive. That is what is making me sad.




It is impossibly difficult to not let this question consume you. Your friend was depressed and may have left no signs that he intended to end his life. None of us are mind-readers and though I know what it is like to have lost someone and feel extreme guilt for not being able to prevent their death...there is nothing that you could have done. His depression and desperation lead to his very tragic death but please do not blame yourself for something you had no control over. If he had reached out for you, as his friend you would have been there. The fact that he didn't do this has nothing to do with you or any failure on your part and all to do with his determination to end his life. I pray that your heart will find peace in the coming days *hugs*


----------



## MzDeeZyre

I miss my friend.


----------



## balletguy

My email has been down for the past 4 hours at work..not looking forward to in turning on I will get a ton of messages all at once


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

According to my mother, I'm an awful person all the way around.


----------



## CastingPearls

MizzSnakeBite said:


> According to my mother, I'm an awful person all the way around.


But that's not true. And it sounds like she and my dad have a lot in common.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

CastingPearls said:


> But that's not true. And it sounds like she and my dad have a lot in common.



Thanks Pearl.  She certainly loves to point out all of my faults over and over, but glosses over hers (and you better not dare mention hers...). I don't know.....it's gotten to the point that I think maybe she's right, maybe I am awful.


----------



## freakyfred

College is almost finished for me. I'm gonna miss alot of my classmates


----------



## littlefairywren

MizzSnakeBite said:


> According to my mother, I'm an awful person all the way around.



Your mother can BITE me! You are not awful, Momma Bird....and don't you ever think so either! Soft hugs, my sweetie :happy:


----------



## mossystate

MizzSnakeBite said:


> According to my mother, I'm an awful person all the way around.



No, just, no. I am hoping you have more times where you step away from the words, and know your worth. Pain, of all kinds, can have an already tight situation just explode in all kinds of ugliness. I know you know this, and I hate most of all that you are internalizing what doesn't belong to you. I hope for the ' one day ' for you, Devi.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Exactly what Mossy said. Devi, you're an amazing, beautiful person, and you've brought so much light to the dark corners of Dimensions. We're all amazingly lucky that you're here, and I'm lucky you let me call you my friend. :happy:

*big hugs* sweetie. You are beyond valuable. You are priceless.


----------



## Dromond

Jackie (my wife) had been out of work for 8 months before finally finding a full time job last week. Unfortunately, it was too late. Our financial situation had deteriorated to the point we couldn't keep up. She had to declare bankruptcy, and after much discussion we decided to let the house go with the other debts.

We've notified the attorney who got back to us today saying she added the home loan to the bankruptcy filing. Now we are waiting for the bank to send us a "get the hell out" letter, and we will have 30 days after receipt of the letter to move out.

This is wrenching for both of us. Me because I basically just got here (just over one year ago), and her because she loves this place. I've come to love it, too. I do not want to move, but there isn't a choice. The house is under water, and it needs around $20K in repairs on the house and property to bring it up to the point where we could sell it - and a sale would still lose money, even if we could afford to make those repairs. Which we can't.

When we move, which will be within a month or two I'm sure, we will be moving to Florida. Both Jackie and I have family there, so it makes sense. Her kids are in Orlando and my sister is in Tampa. It would be nice to be able to drop in on sis and the family at will, I have to admit.

Still, I've made new friends here, and Jackie has long standing friends here also. In fact, I love this area. The people are friendly, the landscape is gorgeous, and I actually rather like the isolation. The thought of living in the Orlando metro area doesn't fill me with joy. Jackie isn't fond of the idea either, but Orlando is where her kids (and grandkids) are. That makes it less of a pain for her than it does for me.

Then there is finding a place to live. Once we get there we can bunk with her daughter and roommates, but that's a temporary (as in a few days) solution. We need someplace to live, and I don't think Jackie quite appreciates the difficulty we are going to run into because both of us now have bankruptcies on our financial records. Oh, of course the job issue for Jackie. Not to mention the packing and logistics of moving our stuff, then storing it until we can find a house to rent.

It's happening way too fast. I'm having trouble wrapping my head around it. Regardless, tomorrow I start packing. Again.


----------



## spiritangel

I would be wondering why she is such a bitter twisted indavidual and refusing to take on her poisen or toxicity because from what I have seen on here and the little I have gotten to know you on DIMMs your an amazing wonderful beautiful soul whose inner light radiates from within! Please dont let her bring you down or your lovely energy


As for me I am sad cause I am sick in the I am putting off the phone call to my drs and hoping but if things dont change in the next couple of days its off to the drs for me and the heavy antibiotics that totally knock me around meh


----------



## Famouslastwords

Devi, momma birdie, I wuv woo. I'm hiding under your porch because I love you. Did you know there are snakes down here? Yeah. It's scary. I'm trying not to move so they don't bite me but they're slithering all over me. Please let me in the house, this is not at all like in the movie UP, DAMN TEXAS.

Anyway, what I meant to say is. You're awesome, and my mom was bipolar too and talked a lot of smack as well. In fact, even in her suicide note she just had to talk a little more shit to me before she hit the road to hell. The point is, you shouldn't let it get to you and bring you down. Just do everything you need to and everything in your power to be who you need to be and what you need to be to be happy, sane and healthy. It's a tall task, but the payoff is jackpot.


----------



## HottiMegan

MizzSnakeBite said:


> She certainly loves to point out all of my faults over and over, but glosses over hers (and you better not dare mention hers...). I don't know.....it's gotten to the point that I think maybe she's right, maybe I am awful.



I hope and pray that some day, sooner than later, that you can collect the assets to get away from her. She is poison. I am so sorry you have to go through this. As the others have said, you are a good person. You are not awful. My mom often made me say this sort of thing as a kind of mantra to myself in the mirror. (I'm a life long self-hater)


----------



## Mathias

When someone says something that absolutely destroys you inside and you have to act like you don't care and shrug it off all for the sake of keeping peace. :really sad: Words can hurt. Think before you speak.


----------



## HDANGEL15

DAMN MOTORCYLCLE PROBLEMS cancelled my trip to GRACELAND THIS WEEKEND


----------



## Micara

Last night, I was very irritated that it took me over an hour to get home, on what is normally a ten-minute drive. We had a massive downpour yesterday, and most of my town was under water. Now, after seeing pictures of all the damage, I am very grateful that all I lost was time. I am sad that so many people in my town lost their vehicles or suffered damage to their homes. I am thankful that no one lost their lives. 

http://blogs.sj-r.com/behindthecurtain/index.php/2010/05/26/covering-the-flash-flooding/


----------



## HottiMegan

Micara said:


> Last night, I was very irritated that it took me over an hour to get home, on what is normally a ten-minute drive. We had a massive downpour yesterday, and most of my town was under water. Now, after seeing pictures of all the damage, I am very grateful that all I lost was time. I am sad that so many people in my town lost their vehicles or suffered damage to their homes. I am thankful that no one lost their lives.
> 
> http://blogs.sj-r.com/behindthecurtain/index.php/2010/05/26/covering-the-flash-flooding/



Geez that's scary!


----------



## Your Plump Princess

I found out that My Step mom and My's Friend Becky has been being hit by her husband.
He does it where clothes cover up.
She's so frail she can barely get out of bed to make it to the bathroom, and can't sometimes when she's really bad.

I know the other day, all he fed her was one yogurt cup.
When she asked him about dinner, he slammed the door in her face and turned his TV up really loud so he wouldn't have to hear her.

I'm almost glad she's having back surgery today and will be doing the rehab in a center near my home.


----------



## mossystate

Your Plump Princess said:


> I found out that My Step mom and My's Friend Becky has been being hit by her husband.
> He does it where clothes cover up.
> She's so frail she can barely get out of bed to make it to the bathroom, and can't sometimes when she's really bad.
> 
> I know the other day, all he fed her was one yogurt cup.
> When she asked him about dinner, he slammed the door in her face and turned his TV up really loud so he wouldn't have to hear her.
> 
> I'm almost glad she's having back surgery today and will be doing the rehab in a center near my home.




You seem to know a lot of information about what is going on in that house. Is your stepmom going to be talking to the proper authorities? Someone this frail, and going into surgery, needs to be protected.

Please do not just hate that he is doing this. You cannot be with her all the time. If he hits her when she is hobbling around worse than she is now...she might end up dead.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

I'm Watching my brother while my stepmother and my father are with our friend at the hospital. While she's in the rehab center near our house, my stepmom is going to try to get her hooked up with what services our county has to offer. 


This woman is 50-something years old, very large, and has fibromyalgia. [which is why she can barely do anything for herself when she has rough patches, and with her back she'd been having a lot of them]


My stepmom is planning on talking with her, and getting it all taken care of. As my stepmother herself came from a multi-abuse marraige and knows exactly what needs to be done. 


My feelings of this maggot are so far beyond hate, it's just sick.


----------



## mossystate

Good to hear that your stepmom is going to get some balls rolling ( too bad it can't be those on the abusive piece of shit ). 

If she hasn't already done so, she...somebody...needs to be telling the hospital, and then the rehab center, about this situation. Not only is the abusive husband a threat to his wife...he is a threat to those helping her. Your friend may want to wave away any help, but the facilities where she is getting care...they deserve to know, and they can be more vigilant. They are also going to be able to help with the presenting your friend with resources. She might not have a real choice ( and I can imagine her fear of not having a home to go back to ), if people know they would be sending a frail person back into abuse. If she still has any marks on her body, they need to be documented.

Ugh. Here's hoping she can physically heal, and then get the other help she needs.


----------



## cinnamitch

mossystate said:


> Good to hear that your stepmom is going to get some balls rolling ( too bad it can't be those on the abusive piece of shit ).
> 
> If she hasn't already done so, she...somebody...needs to be telling the hospital, and then the rehab center, about this situation. Not only is the abusive husband a threat to his wife...he is a threat to those helping her. Your friend may want to wave away any help, but the facilities where she is getting care...they deserve to know, and they can be more vigilant. They are also going to be able to help with the presenting your friend with resources. She might not have a real choice ( and I can imagine her fear of not having a home to go back to ), if people know they would be sending a frail person back into abuse. If she still has any marks on her body, they need to be documented.
> 
> Ugh. Here's hoping she can physically heal, and then get the other help she needs.



If while in the rehab center they see evidence of abuse, the home can start the proceedings for her to be declared a vulnerable adult and if it can be proven it has been her husband or bf or whatever doing it a restraining order can be taken out. If nothing gets done by the facility i hope those who know about this don't let it drop. Call adult protective services, call the police, call whoever will listen.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

littlefairywren said:


> Your mother can BITE me! You are not awful, Momma Bird....and don't you ever think so either! Soft hugs, my sweetie :happy:





mossystate said:


> No, just, no. I am hoping you have more times where you step away from the words, and know your worth. Pain, of all kinds, can have an already tight situation just explode in all kinds of ugliness. I know you know this, and I hate most of all that you are internalizing what doesn't belong to you. I hope for the ' one day ' for you, Devi.





BigBeautifulMe said:


> Exactly what Mossy said. Devi, you're an amazing, beautiful person, and you've brought so much light to the dark corners of Dimensions. We're all amazingly lucky that you're here, and I'm lucky you let me call you my friend. :happy:
> 
> *big hugs* sweetie. You are beyond valuable. You are priceless.





spiritangel said:


> I would be wondering why she is such a bitter twisted indavidual and refusing to take on her poisen or toxicity because from what I have seen on here and the little I have gotten to know you on DIMMs your an amazing wonderful beautiful soul whose inner light radiates from within! Please dont let her bring you down or your lovely energy
> 
> 
> As for me I am sad cause I am sick in the I am putting off the phone call to my drs and hoping but if things dont change in the next couple of days its off to the drs for me and the heavy antibiotics that totally knock me around meh





Famouslastwords said:


> Devi, momma birdie, I wuv woo. I'm hiding under your porch because I love you. Did you know there are snakes down here? Yeah. It's scary. I'm trying not to move so they don't bite me but they're slithering all over me. Please let me in the house, this is not at all like in the movie UP, DAMN TEXAS.
> 
> Anyway, what I meant to say is. You're awesome, and my mom was bipolar too and talked a lot of smack as well. In fact, even in her suicide note she just had to talk a little more shit to me before she hit the road to hell. The point is, you shouldn't let it get to you and bring you down. Just do everything you need to and everything in your power to be who you need to be and what you need to be to be happy, sane and healthy. It's a tall task, but the payoff is jackpot.





HottiMegan said:


> I hope and pray that some day, sooner than later, that you can collect the assets to get away from her. She is poison. I am so sorry you have to go through this. As the others have said, you are a good person. You are not awful. My mom often made me say this sort of thing as a kind of mantra to myself in the mirror. (I'm a life long self-hater)



Thanks ladies. :wubu:

Spiritangel, she's that way 'cause she's bipolar and has borderline personality disorder. Knowing that doesn't make it any easier though.

Rach, having an exile in thighville moment? lol


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Dromond said:


> Jackie (my wife) had been out of work for 8 months before finally finding a full time job last week. Unfortunately, it was too late. Our financial situation had deteriorated to the point we couldn't keep up. She had to declare bankruptcy, and after much discussion we decided to let the house go with the other debts.
> 
> We've notified the attorney who got back to us today saying she added the home loan to the bankruptcy filing. Now we are waiting for the bank to send us a "get the hell out" letter, and we will have 30 days after receipt of the letter to move out.
> 
> This is wrenching for both of us. Me because I basically just got here (just over one year ago), and her because she loves this place. I've come to love it, too. I do not want to move, but there isn't a choice. The house is under water, and it needs around $20K in repairs on the house and property to bring it up to the point where we could sell it - and a sale would still lose money, even if we could afford to make those repairs. Which we can't.
> 
> When we move, which will be within a month or two I'm sure, we will be moving to Florida. Both Jackie and I have family there, so it makes sense. Her kids are in Orlando and my sister is in Tampa. It would be nice to be able to drop in on sis and the family at will, I have to admit.
> 
> Still, I've made new friends here, and Jackie has long standing friends here also. In fact, I love this area. The people are friendly, the landscape is gorgeous, and I actually rather like the isolation. The thought of living in the Orlando metro area doesn't fill me with joy. Jackie isn't fond of the idea either, but Orlando is where her kids (and grandkids) are. That makes it less of a pain for her than it does for me.
> 
> Then there is finding a place to live. Once we get there we can bunk with her daughter and roommates, but that's a temporary (as in a few days) solution. We need someplace to live, and I don't think Jackie quite appreciates the difficulty we are going to run into because both of us now have bankruptcies on our financial records. Oh, of course the job issue for Jackie. Not to mention the packing and logistics of moving our stuff, then storing it until we can find a house to rent.
> 
> It's happening way too fast. I'm having trouble wrapping my head around it. Regardless, tomorrow I start packing. Again.



I'm sorry to hear that; I hope things start to improve for the both of you.


----------



## spiritangel

My Cousins Husband being a complete ass and telling her he is now in love with the 18 yr old girl that has been staying with them because amber was helping get her back on the straight and narrow, just to dig the boot as to why he left and create more drama of course


----------



## GTAFA

I took a male friend of my daughter to the opera on Thursday night. He comes from a broken home, impoverished, but is trying to build a better future for himself. That future currently leads through Afghanistan. He's in the Canadian Forces. I am very proud of this young guy, who plans to go to school once he returns.

I am sad when i think of all those whose circumstances --poverty etc-- force them to take a brave path into harm's way to build a better life. I'm worried for him on his upcoming tour, praying he'll be okay and sad for all those who are over there in that impossible country where they don't seem to want us there or appreciate what we're doing. (sigh don't get me started) ... It seems so tragic when people are forced by their poverty to take on these impossible tasks (and yes i know some people willingly volunteer and aren't just forced by poverty), jobs that others in our society wouldn't undertake. We owe them so much.

....but he DID enjoy the opera.


----------



## Tanuki

Got turned down by my crush, got the 'you know we are just friends, right'.

Also a couple that is very dear to me broke up... sad.


----------



## Micara

My life is making me sad right now. I feel very confused and sad and I don't know what to do. I wish that I could just be someone else for awhile.


----------



## Tiguan

I am sad that i have to spend Memorial Day weekend livin ou tof my Jaguar, slightly Stinky and not "OK" until Thursday. 

.. But it could be a whole lot Worse!!!


----------



## succubus_dxb

drunken emo rant...


It's my birthday and i feel a bit SHITTY because barely anyone came out for a drink, even my f*cking housemate forgot it was tonight, and didn't take the night off work like he promised he would. I miss my mum, and am wondering what the fuck i'm doing with my life in Melbourne.

/rant.


----------



## Linda

succubus_dxb said:


> drunken emo rant...
> 
> 
> It's my birthday and i feel a bit SHITTY because barely anyone came out for a drink, even my f*cking housemate forgot it was tonight, and didn't take the night off work like he promised he would. I miss my mum, and am wondering what the fuck i'm doing with my life in Melbourne.
> 
> /rant.





Sorry it's not the best day. 

Happy Birthday though.


----------



## msbard90

What's making me sad right now is my boyfriend's mother. She has not been in his life for years, has never celebrated a holiday, a birthday, nothing. She has never given him anything, not even love, not even her time of day. However, she has the audacity to harrass him over text message demanding that he better get his brother a birthday cake (she LOOOOOOOOOVES his brother) and a nice birthday present. Nate asks her, "Why should I? I'm barely making my bills and I am letting him live with me in my one room apartment. Besides, since when have you ever cared about making sure anyone got me a birthday cake?" Then the conversation escalates to the point of, "I'd do anything for your brother and sister because they are more responsible than you. You don't know shit". That made me really sad because if she only knew what he came from and how hard he worked to get where he is today, she would think differently. But she'll never know because she chooses not to. God that wretched psycho bitch makes me so sad and angry!!!!!!!!

ETA: She also "demanded" that Nate never kick his brother out of his house, "or else"..... Who the hell is she to say these things?!?!?!?! Who is she???????? My favorite part of the conversation is when he told her that his aunt is more of a mother to him than she'll ever be. Made me feel so f'in good!


----------



## CastingPearls

succubus_dxb said:


> drunken emo rant...
> 
> 
> It's my birthday and i feel a bit SHITTY because barely anyone came out for a drink, even my f*cking housemate forgot it was tonight, and didn't take the night off work like he promised he would. I miss my mum, and am wondering what the fuck i'm doing with my life in Melbourne.
> 
> /rant.


Happy Birthday anyway. Mine sucked ass too for similar reasons. I feel your pain.


----------



## Tiguan

CastingPearls said:


> Happy Birthday anyway. Mine sucked ass too for similar reasons. I feel your pain.



My Bithday is coming Very Soon.. and i will NOT let ANYONE get me DOWN!!  Matter of fact. ill be Working the first 4 Hours of it 

Hapy Birthday!!!


----------



## rellis10

Starting to get stressed and worried about starting this new job on tuesday. I'm a bloody neurotic mess


----------



## spiritangel

Hugs succubus_dxb birthdays do appear to be over rated, and I know exactly how you feel. Big squishy Hugs, lots of birthday wishes and I do hope you at least treated yourself to something you really wanted for your birthday



msbard90 I think the fact that he refused to buy into her BS is fantastic and that he stood up for himself shows how amazing he truly is


rellis10 lots of deep breaths if they diddnt think you would be good at the job you would not have gotten hired in the first place, have faith in yourself because you can do it, you know that and we all get nervous when starting a new job, just dont let it send you into a panick


----------



## littlefairywren

succubus_dxb said:


> drunken emo rant...
> 
> 
> It's my birthday and i feel a bit SHITTY because barely anyone came out for a drink, even my f*cking housemate forgot it was tonight, and didn't take the night off work like he promised he would. I miss my mum, and am wondering what the fuck i'm doing with my life in Melbourne.
> 
> /rant.



Oh hon, I am sorry you are hurting. But Happy Birthday Bobbie, you sweet girl!
Take yourself out for some retail therapy


----------



## Linda

rellis10 said:


> Starting to get stressed and worried about starting this new job on tuesday. I'm a bloody neurotic mess



(((Hugs))) I bet it goes splendidly.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Micara said:


> My life is making me sad right now. I feel very confused and sad and I don't know what to do. I wish that I could just be someone else for awhile.



(((HUGS))) to you sweetie :wubu:



succubus_dxb said:


> drunken emo rant...
> 
> 
> It's my birthday and i feel a bit SHITTY because barely anyone came out for a drink, even my f*cking housemate forgot it was tonight, and didn't take the night off work like he promised he would. I miss my mum, and am wondering what the fuck i'm doing with my life in Melbourne.
> 
> /rant.



I'm so sorry you're having such a bad birthday.  



msbard90 said:


> What's making me sad right now is my boyfriend's mother. She has not been in his life for years, has never celebrated a holiday, a birthday, nothing. She has never given him anything, not even love, not even her time of day. However, she has the audacity to harrass him over text message demanding that he better get his brother a birthday cake (she LOOOOOOOOOVES his brother) and a nice birthday present. Nate asks her, "Why should I? I'm barely making my bills and I am letting him live with me in my one room apartment. Besides, since when have you ever cared about making sure anyone got me a birthday cake?" Then the conversation escalates to the point of, "I'd do anything for your brother and sister because they are more responsible than you. You don't know shit". That made me really sad because if she only knew what he came from and how hard he worked to get where he is today, she would think differently. But she'll never know because she chooses not to. God that wretched psycho bitch makes me so sad and angry!!!!!!!!
> 
> ETA: She also "demanded" that Nate never kick his brother out of his house, "or else"..... Who the hell is she to say these things?!?!?!?! Who is she???????? My favorite part of the conversation is when he told her that his aunt is more of a mother to him than she'll ever be. Made me feel so f'in good!



Good for him for not bowing down to her! :bow:



rellis10 said:


> Starting to get stressed and worried about starting this new job on tuesday. I'm a bloody neurotic mess



It's going to be just fine! Why, you ask? Because I, Momma Bird, said so!


----------



## Proner

I quit the soccer's team, we had a big argument with the coach and I'm tired that he's still mad at me and trying to put me down. 
I feel very bad to leave my teammates but I can't continue to be on the team with the ridiculous coach's attitude


----------



## Linda

Proner said:


> I quit the soccer's team, we had a big argument with the coach and I'm tired that he's still mad at me and trying to put me down.
> I feel very bad to leave my teammates but I can't continue to be on the team with the ridiculous coach's attitude



Sorry to hear he never came around. Sucks beingthe bigger person means you have to move on from something you love. Another door will open soon.


----------



## BBW4Chattery

Fluffy51888 said:


> A friend of mine lost her boyfriend in a car accident this weekend. My heart just breaks for her. I can't imagine finally finding the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, and then losing them.



Sorry for your loss and your friend's loss.


----------



## Christov

I just found a website with kickass Chinese recipes but I can't go and test them out because it's 1AM and making food at such a time is stupid. 

Sesame chicken, you shall have to wait until the morrow.


----------



## Tiguan

Im Stuck in the town i am in until i get Money to drive back, the day before i go to Work.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Proner said:


> I quit the soccer's team, we had a big argument with the coach and I'm tired that he's still mad at me and trying to put me down.
> I feel very bad to leave my teammates but I can't continue to be on the team with the ridiculous coach's attitude



Sorry to hear that Proner.  I'm sure a wonderful team will snatch you up!


----------



## Proner

Linda said:


> Sorry to hear he never came around. Sucks beingthe bigger person means you have to move on from something you love. Another door will open soon.





MizzSnakeBite said:


> Sorry to hear that Proner.  I'm sure a wonderful team will snatch you up!



Thank you both 
Well I had a proposition by the team which beat us and finished first... I met the coach and he seems very nice and close to his players and the proposition is very tempting as I did my best this year to go in the upper division and I would play in the upper division next season.
But I feel like if I accept I will betray my old teammates by passing at the ennemy so I'm kinda lost for now


----------



## Agent 007

rellis10 said:


> Starting to get stressed and worried about starting this new job on tuesday. I'm a bloody neurotic mess



So, how did it go today? Were you nervous?


----------



## rellis10

Agent 007 said:


> So, how did it go today? Were you nervous?



It went quite well, it was only the induction (which goes on for two weeks) so i'm being eased into it. Only annoying thing was going between the two buildings the company owns that are a short walk accross town. Had to jump between them a few times for tours and stuff so (to keep in topic ) i'm sad because my feet hurt a bit.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Proner said:


> Thank you both
> Well I had a proposition by the team which beat us and finished first... I met the coach and he seems very nice and close to his players and the proposition is very tempting as I did my best this year to go in the upper division and I would play in the upper division next season.
> But I feel like if I accept I will betray my old teammates by passing at the ennemy so I'm kinda lost for now



You might think of talking to your former teammates. I'm betting that they'd fully support you, and wish you the best of luck with the new team.  They probably know what happened between you and the coach, and would support you knowing that you didn't leave because you just wanted to play on an upper division team, but because you were pretty much forced out by the coach.



rellis10 said:


> *It went quite well*, it was only the induction (which goes on for two weeks) so i'm being eased into it. Only annoying thing was going between the two buildings the company owns that are a short walk accross town. Had to jump between them a few times for tours and stuff so (to keep in topic ) i'm sad because my feet hurt a bit.



See, I told you!!!


----------



## Agent 007

rellis10 said:


> It went quite well, it was only the induction (which goes on for two weeks) so i'm being eased into it. Only annoying thing was going between the two buildings the company owns that are a short walk accross town. Had to jump between them a few times for tours and stuff so (to keep in topic ) i'm sad because my feet hurt a bit.



Good to hear. I hope you'll enjoy your new job. Hope your feet will get better.

What's making me sad right now is that I've been unemployed for nearly four months and it sucks. I've written dozens of letters by now, but I hardly even get invited for job interviews. They just tell me I'm 1 person out of a total of 30 who have applied for the job, so they won't invite me for the interview.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Agent 007 said:


> Good to hear. I hope you'll enjoy your new job. Hope your feet will get better.
> 
> What's making me sad right now is that I've been unemployed for nearly four months and it sucks. I've written dozens of letters by now, but I hardly even get invited for job interviews. They just tell me I'm 1 person out of a total of 30 who have applied for the job, so they won't invite me for the interview.



 Hope you're able to find a job ASAP.


----------



## Proner

MizzSnakeBite said:


> You might think of talking to your former teammates. I'm betting that they'd fully support you, and wish you the best of luck with the new team.  They probably know what happened between you and the coach, and would support you knowing that you didn't leave because you just wanted to play on an upper division team, but because you were pretty much forced out by the coach.



I already talked with the former teammates I'm close with and you're right as they told me to join this time as I deserve to play in the upper division.
I know most of my former teammates will support me, it's just the feeling I have to pass to the ennemy, I spent so much time with my former teammates that it will be weird to play against them next season.


----------



## rellis10

Agent 007 said:


> Good to hear. I hope you'll enjoy your new job. Hope your feet will get better.
> 
> What's making me sad right now is that I've been unemployed for nearly four months and it sucks. I've written dozens of letters by now, but I hardly even get invited for job interviews. They just tell me I'm 1 person out of a total of 30 who have applied for the job, so they won't invite me for the interview.



Thanks 007 and MizSnakeBite. I'm sure the feet just need to get used to being up and about every day 

And i completely understand your feelings 007. After being unemployed for alot longer than four months i'v been through it. It can be soul destroying when you are constantly rejected, but you just gotta keep plugging away and eventually somebody will see your talent and pick you up. If you EVER need to rant and vent about unemployment annoying you, i'll gladly listen.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Proner said:


> I already talked with the former teammates I'm close with and you're right as they told me to join this time as I deserve to play in the upper division.
> I know most of my former teammates will support me, it's just the feeling I have to pass to the ennemy, I spent so much time with my former teammates that it will be weird to play against them next season.



Listen to them.  I'm sure, with time, you'll gradually get used to playing against them, and will become close to another team (whichever team you choose to go to). It'll be hard for awhile. 



rellis10 said:


> Thanks 007 and MizSnakeBite. I'm sure the feet just need to get used to being up and about every day



Gel inserts!


----------



## Weirdo890

I'm sad because I take things too seriously when people joke with me.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Weirdo890 said:


> I'm sad because I take things too seriously when people joke with me.



(((HUGS))) to you sweetie!

I can be the same way sometimes.


----------



## rellis10

Weirdo890 said:


> I'm sad because I take things too seriously when people joke with me.



Same here too, you're in good company


----------



## Agent 007

MizzSnakeBite said:


> Hope you're able to find a job ASAP.





rellis10 said:


> Thanks 007 and MizSnakeBite. I'm sure the feet just need to get used to being up and about every day
> 
> And i completely understand your feelings 007. After being unemployed for alot longer than four months i'v been through it. It can be soul destroying when you are constantly rejected, but you just gotta keep plugging away and eventually somebody will see your talent and pick you up. If you EVER need to rant and vent about unemployment annoying you, i'll gladly listen.



Thanks, Mizz SB and Rellis. The job market is really tight right now, but I won't let that get me down. Fortunately my family support me in this tough time and people like you give me some much-needed pep.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

_One of my closest online friends is getting sent to Iran.
I've known him for about 7 years. 
..I Never got to visit him, and now I never will._


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Your Plump Princess said:


> _One of my closest online friends is getting sent to Iran.
> I've known him for about 7 years.
> ..I Never got to visit him, and now I never will._



Try to keep up your spirits and hopes, and try to keep focus on visiting him in the future.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

MizzSnakeBite said:


> Try to keep up your spirits and hopes, and try to keep focus on visiting him in the future.


That's so hard for me. 
I'll try, I dont' know... I just can't stop crying.


----------



## spiritangel

Your Plump Princess said:


> _One of my closest online friends is getting sent to Iran.
> I've known him for about 7 years.
> ..I Never got to visit him, and now I never will._



hugs what Mamma birdie said (sos like that better) and also you can write to him and send him care packages and keep in touch,


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Your Plump Princess said:


> That's so hard for me.
> I'll try, I dont' know... I just can't stop crying.



I know, hon.

Try, and try hard, real hard. You need to stay strong for him right now, so do it for him. Like SA suggested, write him, and send him care packages. It'll keep both of your spirits up.

(((HUGS))) to you sweetie. :kiss2:


----------



## Dromond

MizzSnakeBite said:


> I'm sorry to hear that; I hope things start to improve for the both of you.



Thank you.


----------



## rellis10

Me and my fellow inductees for my new job had to do Initial Assessments for Literacy and Numeracy today.

I aced the Maths one but dropped the ball with Literacy. I expected the other way around since i write ALOT. But in theory and in practice are very different things. I can write very well (hopefully not arrogant, i'v been complimented by many people about it for years) but i'v never been one for the technical side of writing.


----------



## Lamia

I am sad about this stupid video I watched a bit of today. I posted it over on Hyde Park. It's animal cruelty and there is a petition to prosecute the owner of the dairy farm where the abuse happened. He participated in and probably encouraged it. I hate people I truly, truly do. Some people are always freaking out about the end of the world or mankind...my response is meh...good riddance. 

Is humanity ever going to evolve into the loving, peaceful creature that we can be? I guess not until people learn to parent.


----------



## Dromond

Humanity is not a lost cause as long as there are people who rise above their inherent assholery. Don't give up on the hairless apes just yet.


----------



## isamarie69

I do not know exactly whats making me sad, Its just an over whelming feeling of sadness in general. I think i might know why, Just gotta push passed it i guess.


----------



## Kenster102.5

Never having met my father. It was one day after my 18th birthday in August 2009, my grandmother was reading the obit like she would usually do in case there was anyone she knew. Me and my mom were about to head out to Rattlesnake Point in Oakville to do some hiking with my dog. 

My grandmother then called out that she thought my father was in the obituary, my mom came over and said it was certainly him, it was a really sad moment for me. 

My mom and dad had split up while I was still a baby since he was never settling down, and was spending money, and was with another woman. He had been in one marriage before and he had my half-brother with the woman before. This marriage he had before he died was his third, except the wife was very controlling, and did not want the relationship to be bothered by my mom, also this lady was treating my dad like shit from what I had heard. 

The week before I was ironically thinking what it would be like to meet my dad, and that I would soon be an adult, and would surely be able to see him as adult. But sadly he hung himself with a rope in his garage, since a year before he had split with the 3rd lady, and was depressed.

But out of this I was able to still meet my dad's family, and I am very cool with them. But I do very much wish I could have at least met him. Maybe it could have stopped his downward spiral.


----------



## Micara

I'm sad because my good friend Mark just had his house broken into _again. _ Second time in 6 months. 

Sometimes, I just really want to be a bad-ass crimefighting chick.


----------



## Lamia

Kenster102.5 said:


> Never having met my father. It was one day after my 18th birthday in August 2009, my grandmother was reading the obit like she would usually do in case there was anyone she knew. Me and my mom were about to head out to Rattlesnake Point in Oakville to do some hiking with my dog.
> 
> My grandmother then called out that she thought my father was in the obituary, my mom came over and said it was certainly him, it was a really sad moment for me.
> 
> My mom and dad had split up while I was still a baby since he was never settling down, and was spending money, and was with another woman. He had been in one marriage before and he had my half-brother with the woman before. This marriage he had before he died was his third, except the wife was very controlling, and did not want the relationship to be bothered by my mom, also this lady was treating my dad like shit from what I had heard.
> 
> The week before I was ironically thinking what it would be like to meet my dad, and that I would soon be an adult, and would surely be able to see him as adult. But sadly he hung himself with a rope in his garage, since a year before he had split with the 3rd lady, and was depressed.
> 
> But out of this I was able to still meet my dad's family, and I am very cool with them. But I do very much wish I could have at least met him. Maybe it could have stopped his downward spiral.



 I am very sad to hear that.


----------



## DreamyInToronto

Kenster102.5 said:


> Never having met my father. It was one day after my 18th birthday in August 2009, my grandmother was reading the obit like she would usually do in case there was anyone she knew. Me and my mom were about to head out to Rattlesnake Point in Oakville to do some hiking with my dog.
> 
> My grandmother then called out that she thought my father was in the obituary, my mom came over and said it was certainly him, it was a really sad moment for me.
> 
> My mom and dad had split up while I was still a baby since he was never settling down, and was spending money, and was with another woman. He had been in one marriage before and he had my half-brother with the woman before. This marriage he had before he died was his third, except the wife was very controlling, and did not want the relationship to be bothered by my mom, also this lady was treating my dad like shit from what I had heard.
> 
> The week before I was ironically thinking what it would be like to meet my dad, and that I would soon be an adult, and would surely be able to see him as adult. But sadly he hung himself with a rope in his garage, since a year before he had split with the 3rd lady, and was depressed.
> 
> But out of this I was able to still meet my dad's family, and I am very cool with them. But I do very much wish I could have at least met him. Maybe it could have stopped his downward spiral.



This breaks my heart Kenster102.5. I wish I could give you a big big hug. xoxo


----------



## DreamyInToronto

I am sad right now for many reasons.

I unintentionally hurt a friend and had no idea until he told me. I feel awful.

My mother lost her job and is going to be evicted from her apartment.

I have to have surgery on July 13th.

Work is crazy right now.

My childhood friend died in his 35th year of brain cancer. I never got to say goodbye.

I have no one to cuddle with.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

DreamyInToronto said:


> I am sad right now for many reasons.
> 
> I unintentionally hurt a friend and had no idea until he told me. I feel awful.
> 
> My mother lost her job and is going to be evicted from her apartment.
> 
> I have to have surgery on July 13th.
> 
> Work is crazy right now.
> 
> My childhood friend died in his 35th year of brain cancer. I never got to say goodbye.
> 
> I have no one to cuddle with.



I'm so sorry about all you and your family's losses. When those sorts of things happen one at a time, it's bad enough, but it makes it so much worse when everything comes raining down at you all at once.

I hope your surgery goes well, and you have no complications.

(((HUGS)))


----------



## GTAFA

DreamyInToronto said:


> I am sad right now for many reasons.
> 
> I unintentionally hurt a friend and had no idea until he told me. I feel awful.
> 
> My mother lost her job and is going to be evicted from her apartment.
> 
> I have to have surgery on July 13th.
> 
> Work is crazy right now.
> 
> My childhood friend died in his 35th year of brain cancer. I never got to say goodbye.
> 
> I have no one to cuddle with.



That's quite a list. Allow me to post what surely will be the first of several (((cyber-hugs))) from your dimension buddies. 

And look at the bright side. You say work is crazy right now? Does "Crazy" = employed, in demand from your workplace? some people would gladly trade with you. 

Hope you'll be feeling better.


----------



## spiritangel

lots of huggles to all who need them atm

as for me is silly really but was soo excited about some new stuff from ebay and totally bummed cause they just dont fit


----------



## Kenster102.5

I don't know what it is but in my family there are births and deaths in the summer months.
My older aunt (my grandmother's sister) died of stomach cancer in July 2008, my father died in August 2009, and 2 days ago on Monday my aunt died. 

Me and my mother were going to her house to pick up her dog and her to go to the vet. My grandmother had last talked with her on Sunday about a show on the Gulags and Estonians.

My grandmother who is Estonian had immigrated with her and her mother (older aunt) to Canada in 1952 from Sweden. 

So my mother went the next day on Monday around 3:00 to pick up her and her dog, she had knocked on the door and waited a couple of minutes, even called the house from her cell but no one came to the door, so she rushed home and picked up the spare keys and me, and we went off with the feeling that she had blacked out or collapsed from drinking. We went inside the TV was on and the room was dark. We headed upstairs and we found her face down beside her bed, she was cold and her legs were pale. We called 911 the operator instructed to turn her over and do some compressions. Now not to be offensive in anyway but she was a overweight lady, not by choice she just didn't take care of herself, and it was really hard to move her since her leg was stuck under the bed. When we turned her over I felt the blood, and all of the blood had pooled in her face making it purple, and her nose had been crushed and she had a grimace on her face. Ironically I was supposed to move a tree for her this week.

The EMS and FD came, but she was already dead we knew it, and we had to wait for the coroner, the police, and her brother. 

As we were waiting my mother noticed that the coffee had been half finished and that she had a blood tissue on the table near the TV, so it seemed that she had a nose bleed which wasn't uncommon for her. So it seemed like it happened in the morning since the TV was on the news, and she had coffee and then she had a nose bleed and went upstairs.

Her brother was my older aunts son, and he and his son and daughter are my cousins. So the 2 cousins came, the daughter and the father. The daughter is in forensics doing her masters in skeletal, but when the father saw the body he didn't want her to see it, even though she was wanting to see it. 

The coroner came and he was coincidentally Estonian, the coroner looked at her blood pressure medication and had examined the body, and we told her the blood pressure was 200 over something. The last prescription for medication was in January, and so we think she was stubborn at taking the medication, and drinking. 

Basically it was a shock to my family, since my grandmother would talk to my aunt on a normal basis, they had still a lot to talk about after the older aunt died, I had just recently helped my cousins fix my aunts porch and we were happy to help. My cousin was distraught because he had lost a lot of his wifes family last year, and now this. My cousin would have been 65 in August and so she would have been able to recieve her old age pension, and things would have been easier, she just didn't take care of herself enough, but she was still a happy person.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Kenster102.5 said:


> I don't know what it is but in my family there are births and deaths in the summer months.
> My older aunt (my grandmother's sister) died of stomach cancer in July 2008, my father died in August 2009, and 2 days ago on Monday my aunt died.
> 
> Me and my mother were going to her house to pick up her dog and her to go to the vet. My grandmother had last talked with her on Sunday about a show on the Gulags and Estonians.
> 
> My grandmother who is Estonian had immigrated with her and her mother (older aunt) to Canada in 1952 from Sweden.
> 
> So my mother went the next day on Monday around 3:00 to pick up her and her dog, she had knocked on the door and waited a couple of minutes, even called the house from her cell but no one came to the door, so she rushed home and picked up the spare keys and me, and we went off with the feeling that she had blacked out or collapsed from drinking. We went inside the TV was on and the room was dark. We headed upstairs and we found her face down beside her bed, she was cold and her legs were pale. We called 911 the operator instructed to turn her over and do some compressions. Now not to be offensive in anyway but she was a overweight lady, not by choice she just didn't take care of herself, and it was really hard to move her since her leg was stuck under the bed. When we turned her over I felt the blood, and all of the blood had pooled in her face making it purple, and her nose had been crushed and she had a grimace on her face. Ironically I was supposed to move a tree for her this week.
> 
> The EMS and FD came, but she was already dead we knew it, and we had to wait for the coroner, the police, and her brother.
> 
> As we were waiting my mother noticed that the coffee had been half finished and that she had a blood tissue on the table near the TV, so it seemed that she had a nose bleed which wasn't uncommon for her. So it seemed like it happened in the morning since the TV was on the news, and she had coffee and then she had a nose bleed and went upstairs.
> 
> Her brother was my older aunts son, and he and his son and daughter are my cousins. So the 2 cousins came, the daughter and the father. The daughter is in forensics doing her masters in skeletal, but when the father saw the body he didn't want her to see it, even though she was wanting to see it.
> 
> The coroner came and he was coincidentally Estonian, the coroner looked at her blood pressure medication and had examined the body, and we told her the blood pressure was 200 over something. The last prescription for medication was in January, and so we think she was stubborn at taking the medication, and drinking.
> 
> Basically it was a shock to my family, since my grandmother would talk to my aunt on a normal basis, they had still a lot to talk about after the older aunt died, I had just recently helped my cousins fix my aunts porch and we were happy to help. My cousin was distraught because he had lost a lot of his wifes family last year, and now this. My cousin would have been 65 in August and so she would have been able to recieve her old age pension, and things would have been easier, she just didn't take care of herself enough, but she was still a happy person.



I'm so sorry for your loss, and I hope things brighten.


----------



## CastingPearls

Kenster, so so sorry for your loss. My condolences to you and your family.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

For what seems like a month, which I'm sure it has not been, I've been looking forward to going to a semi-local Museum, because they are holding an 80's flashback type thing.

It's this saturday.

For the past week, I've been counting down the days.
My cousin swore up and down we were totally going.

Now, two days away.
Something in her car needs work.
Or so she tells me.

Which means I and my brother can't go to the waterpark tomorrow.
[She was going to be our ride.]


But more importantly.
It means I can't go to the 80's flashback thing at the museum.
:'( F.ML. 


People always ask me why I'm pessimistic.
Yeah.
It's because of shit like this.
Every single time I get excited about something.
Something always happens.

It dies, or the plan dies, or my hopes die. 
Something always DIES.
Ugh. :/


----------



## balletguy

Your Plump Princess said:


> For what seems like a month, which I'm sure it has not been, I've been looking forward to going to a semi-local Museum, because they are holding an 80's flashback type thing.
> 
> It's this saturday.
> 
> For the past week, I've been counting down the days.
> My cousin swore up and down we were totally going.
> 
> Now, two days away.
> Something in her car needs work.
> Or so she tells me.
> 
> Which means I and my brother can't go to the waterpark tomorrow.
> [She was going to be our ride.]
> 
> 
> But more importantly.
> It means I can't go to the 80's flashback thing at the museum.
> :'( F.ML.
> 
> 
> People always ask me why I'm pessimistic.
> Yeah.
> It's because of shit like this.
> Every single time I get excited about something.
> Something always happens.
> 
> It dies, or the plan dies, or my hopes die.
> Something always DIES.
> Ugh. :/





Ugg. i am so sorry


----------



## Fairia

It feels like what hasn't made me sad. It seems alot of things are being dumped on me at one time or things just taken away from me. It's more than seeing the glass and half full/empty, I don't even see anything inside the glass. 

I'm getting a better grasp on my hernia situation. Deciding not to get surgery if the bladder function won't be healed, but now I find my walking has gotten slower that it can feel like I'm walking for distances when I'm just heading down a few blocks.

I'm sure I mentioned my living situation before, but because of all this, the staff of the group housing I use feel that I can't tell them anything important that goes on medically and move me over to a more staff oriented one. As I said, I do the cathing, take medication for bladder control with less leaks and have staff bring me to medical appointments since I don't drive. But I find now that living there for nine months, that my confidence in my self is low and feel that I can't do anything without other people's help because that's how they viewed me. My self-esteem isn't really any better.

I'm now in a situation where I feel bored and restless all the time and now becoming depressed because of it. I'm not one to make friends easily and all the things I enjoyed before now no longer help. I'm sleeping more when nothing's going on or I don't have any work. And because of all this mental manipulation, if I try to make positive changes, they always seem to be the wrong ones according to staff or loved ones; but yet I feel they're something I want to try.

Yesterday,I was feeling at my worst, my lowest; always thinking nothing will get better for me and at my age that if nothing changes before I hit 30 or leave there before I hit 30, I feel my life is ruined. I've mentioned all this to my dr and my therapist but there's only so much they can do for me. And all this happened because I wanted my meds changed to help my anger. I'm back on the old ones after a month and there hasn't been any improvement.

I just feel I either wanna break out and away or have a slow death into nothing and it scares me. I think I said all I needed to say right now. I'm just completely and utterly "stuck".


----------



## CastingPearls

Fairia said:


> It feels like what hasn't made me sad. It seems alot of things are being dumped on me at one time or things just taken away from me. It's more than seeing the glass and half full/empty, I don't even see anything inside the glass.
> 
> I'm getting a better grasp on my hernia situation. Deciding not to get surgery if the bladder function won't be healed, but now I find my walking has gotten slower that it can feel like I'm walking for distances when I'm just heading down a few blocks.
> 
> I'm sure I mentioned my living situation before, but because of all this, the staff of the group housing I use feel that I can't tell them anything important that goes on medically and move me over to a more staff oriented one. As I said, I do the cathing, take medication for bladder control with less leaks and have staff bring me to medical appointments since I don't drive. But I find now that living there for nine months, that my confidence in my self is low and feel that I can't do anything without other people's help because that's how they viewed me. My self-esteem isn't really any better.
> 
> I'm now in a situation where I feel bored and restless all the time and now becoming depressed because of it. I'm not one to make friends easily and all the things I enjoyed before now no longer help. I'm sleeping more when nothing's going on or I don't have any work. And because of all this mental manipulation, if I try to make positive changes, they always seem to be the wrong ones according to staff or loved ones; but yet I feel they're something I want to try.
> 
> Yesterday,I was feeling at my worst, my lowest; always thinking nothing will get better for me and at my age that if nothing changes before I hit 30 or leave there before I hit 30, I feel my life is ruined. I've mentioned all this to my dr and my therapist but there's only so much they can do for me. And all this happened because I wanted my meds changed to help my anger. I'm back on the old ones after a month and there hasn't been any improvement.
> 
> I just feel I either wanna break out and away or have a slow death into nothing and it scares me. I think I said all I needed to say right now. I'm just completely and utterly "stuck".


I'm so sorry Fairia. I wish I could impart some wisdom or anything to comfort you. I went through some serious medical issues two years ago and am still recovering and all the emotions (including anger) that you're feeling, I experienced and still do. It's a long tough rough and sometimes when I take one step forward- an hour later it's two steps back. Try not to be hard on yourself. You're going through a lot. {{{{{Fairia}}}}}


----------



## snuggletiger

Kinda sad about the article I read on Yahoo about the mismarked graves at Arlington National Cemetery even though its 211 out of 350,000 and percentage wise thats small. Kinda feel bummed that 211 Vets who gave their lives got chumped by the people they were saving.


----------



## spiritangel

oh my starting to think we need a random acts of kindness group like we have on some scrapping forums so we can send little bits of cheer to those who need it


big squishy hugs YPP and Fairia


----------



## Lamia

I am sad for my brother again. His daughter by his 2nd wife just bought a car and was doing the paperwork at the dealership my sister co-owns. My sister called him to come look at the car. When he gets there the ex-harpie asks him why he's there and tells him to get the F out of there and throws a huge fit and won't sign the paperwork until he leaves. She told him he's the worst father ever and a deadbeat etc etc blah blah blah. 

He has never said a bad word against her this entire time. She has done nothing but run him down to her girls. I think what pisses me off the most about this woman is she acts like he doesn't help out or give them money at all. He has paid her $600.00 a month in child support for 12 years and has NEVER missed a payment. She married a rich guy and uses the child support money to take them on trips and buy them clothes, which is great yet the girls think the money is coming from her and not their dad. He also pays for the girl's insurance and helps out with school and other stuff. How is that deadbeat? 

I want to rip her fake boobs off and jam them down her throat.


----------



## NYCGabriel

Being cut off by someone for no reason a over a month and a half ago. We were chatting and getting along wonderfully then poof. Nothing (but on the plus side, I've recently started chatting with someone else, so here's crossing my fingers).

still no luck in full time work.

Even though my cyclothymia is under control, I still feel a twinge or two from my Up and Down sides.

Lack of motivation for almost anything.

Despite the WONDERFUL weather here at the time of this posting (light gray skies, wonderfully cool breeze), I don't want to go out and enjoy it.


----------



## cinnamitch

My ex is having a really tough time right now. He is a union electrician who has been without substantial work for around a year now. I fear his age is working against him. He will be 61 this year. No matter how skilled he is people look at him like he will keel over on the job. He has had to empty his pension fund just to survive and his unemployment ran out and now his truck has broken down. We have had an acrimonious relationship for 10 years but i would never wish him this hardship. He is slowly rebuilding somewhat of a relationship with our kids but it will never be totally repaired. Our oldest still won't talk to him . However she did come through and is going to send him money to get his truck repaired so he can get back to looking for work. I just wish things would get better for him and everyone else out there who is struggling with life. Sometimes my faith that things will get better is sorely tested.


----------



## NYCGabriel

cinnamitch said:


> My ex is having a really tough time right now. He is a union electrician who has been without substantial work for around a year now. I fear his age is working against him. He will be 61 this year. No matter how skilled he is people look at him like he will keel over on the job. He has had to empty his pension fund just to survive and his unemployment ran out and now his truck has broken down. We have had an acrimonious relationship for 10 years but i would never wish him this hardship. He is slowly rebuilding somewhat of a relationship with our kids but it will never be totally repaired. Our oldest still won't talk to him . However she did come through and is going to send him money to get his truck repaired so he can get back to looking for work. I just wish things would get better for him and everyone else out there who is struggling with life. Sometimes my faith that things will get better is sorely tested.




Oh cindy  I'll pray for him at mass this weekend and tonight.


----------



## cinnamitch

NYCGabriel said:


> Oh cindy  I'll pray for him at mass this weekend and tonight.



Thank you, he needs all the help he can get.


----------



## Linda

One of our radiology resident's at work lost his wife suddenly the other day. Such a tragedy. He has two small sons, 2 and 6. He really has no extended family and so his work family has really come in around him to support him. He and the boys can use all the prayers you can muster.


----------



## Saoirse

My friend just told me he's moving back to NY. He wants to go back to school, so Im happy for him, but he's such a good friend and I dont want him to live further away! :really sad:


----------



## Weirdo890

All of the petulant backbiting and in-fighting that goes on here and in the rest of society.


----------



## Micara

One of my besties was in the hospital and I didn't even know it until this morning!


----------



## Weirdo890

Micara said:


> One of my besties was in the hospital and I didn't even know it until this morning!



Oh no. I hope they get well soon.


----------



## Micara

Weirdo890 said:


> Oh no. I hope they get well soon.



She's home now. She has to wear a heart monitor for 24 hours. (I've had to do that before.) 

All of my friends around here are dropping like flies! I still don't know what's wrong with Mark!


----------



## spiritangel

Micara said:


> She's home now. She has to wear a heart monitor for 24 hours. (I've had to do that before.)
> 
> All of my friends around here are dropping like flies! I still don't know what's wrong with Mark!



big hugs Micara that is hard I hate seeing my friends sick or hurting


----------



## Surlysomething

cinnamitch said:


> My ex is having a really tough time right now. He is a union electrician who has been without substantial work for around a year now. I fear his age is working against him. He will be 61 this year. No matter how skilled he is people look at him like he will keel over on the job. He has had to empty his pension fund just to survive and his unemployment ran out and now his truck has broken down. We have had an acrimonious relationship for 10 years but i would never wish him this hardship. He is slowly rebuilding somewhat of a relationship with our kids but it will never be totally repaired. Our oldest still won't talk to him . However she did come through and is going to send him money to get his truck repaired so he can get back to looking for work. I just wish things would get better for him and everyone else out there who is struggling with life. Sometimes my faith that things will get better is sorely tested.




So sorry to hear about this. Life has been pretty damn hard the last few years with this shitty economy.

I hope things get better fast.


----------



## HottiMegan

My birthday is in 2 weeks and hubby insisted that we get me a Nook for my birthday. A little early tonight but we went to get it. Now i can't connect to barnes and noble via my nook to register it or even download any books. I am angry that i might have just been duped out of nearly $300 for an ereader. They claim they're having technical issues right now. I am so angry and sad that i can't play with my new toy.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

[/Deleted Post. Wrong Thread. My ADD Fail'd me again.]


----------



## Lamia

I am sad because my landlord hired new people to mow around our house and I didn't know it. My boyfriend went outside to talk to them and they guy said "I killed that snake that was under your porch" Jim said he was quite taken back when Jim said "What the hell did you do that for?" 

I cried all day.  It was just a garter snake and wasn't hurting anything. People make me mad!


----------



## Saoirse

HottiMegan said:


> My birthday is in 2 weeks and hubby insisted that we get me a Nook for my birthday. A little early tonight but we went to get it. Now i can't connect to barnes and noble via my nook to register it or even download any books. I am angry that i might have just been duped out of nearly $300 for an ereader. They claim they're having technical issues right now. I am so angry and sad that i can't play with my new toy.



My friend has a Nook and absolutely LOVES it. Im sure you'll get connected and be reading some good books soon!


----------



## HottiMegan

My techie hubby finally got it registered so i could shop. I got my all time favorite book Daddy Long Legs onto it for free. That makes me happy


----------



## chocolate desire

Today is my birthday and Rhonda aka DreamBBW always made it special for me and now I cant even hear her say happy birthday. I miss you dear friend.
And Sunday is fathers day and when I was young my dad and I would celebrate together and like Rhonda he was taken from me to soon.


----------



## spiritangel

Hugs to all of you


for me I ache from grocery day ouch and I am wishing I could sell a few bears or some such so I could be up to date with the bills and not have to worry about it for a bit


----------



## Your Plump Princess

I Need to get up off my arse and do something like play more Dance Dace Revolution.

But right now; my feet hurt [I literally just woke up], my knees feel weak, and my back is aching.


----------



## Micara

My good friend Mark is in the hospital, and I don't know why. He had some scary health issues last week, and I told him that he needed to go to the ER but he wouldn't listen. So finally his boss made him call his mom, and she took him. Now nobody knows anything except that he is in the hospital. I've texted him 4 times, no answer. Other people have texted him, no answer. I wish I knew his mom because I would call her myself.  I hope he's okay. He was doing really weird things last week before he went in.


----------



## KittyKitten

Hugs to all of you. Tomorrow morning, mi novio is leaving to his home country for a little while to see his ailing father. I'm going to miss him and I hope his father gets well.


----------



## spiritangel

hugs micara the not knowing is the absolute worst part.

and Hugs to everyone who needs them

I am sad cause I am out of rep and there seems to be a glut of rep worthy posts about atm


----------



## KittyKitten

spiritangel said:


> I am sad cause I am out of rep and there seems to be a glut of rep worthy posts about atm



I hate that we can't be generous with rep points. You can't give them to the people you've rep before and you can only give a certain number every day! Sucks.


----------



## luscious_lulu

I had to put my cat down today. He had complications due to his diabetes and was suffering. :really sad:


----------



## CastingPearls

luscious_lulu said:


> I had to put my cat down today. He had complications due to his diabetes and was suffering. :really sad:


Oh God, Lulu. I'm so sorry. What was his name? {{{{{Lulu}}}}}


----------



## Linda

luscious_lulu said:


> I had to put my cat down today. He had complications due to his diabetes and was suffering. :really sad:





I am so sorry for your loss. ((((Hugs))))


----------



## Micara

luscious_lulu said:


> I had to put my cat down today. He had complications due to his diabetes and was suffering. :really sad:



Awww. I'm very sorry, Lulu. Hugs to you.


----------



## NYCGabriel

luscious_lulu said:


> I had to put my cat down today. He had complications due to his diabetes and was suffering. :really sad:



oh my god!!!  as a cat owner who lost 3 cats I utterly empathize with you!!!!


----------



## luscious_lulu

CastingPearls said:


> Oh God, Lulu. I'm so sorry. What was his name? {{{{{Lulu}}}}}





Linda said:


> I am so sorry for your loss. ((((Hugs))))





Micara said:


> Awww. I'm very sorry, Lulu. Hugs to you.





NYCGabriel said:


> oh my god!!!  as a cat owner who lost 3 cats I utterly empathize with you!!!!



Thank you all! 

His name was Rafiki. I miss him terribly.


----------



## CastingPearls

luscious_lulu said:


> Thank you all!
> 
> His name was Rafiki. I miss him terribly.


I've lost 4. It never gets easier. They're family and the loss is profound. I'm so sorry, Lulu.
I had to put down Mr. Peaches (who I considered a kid in a cat-suit) due to liver cancer after chemo for a year and I miss him everyday. I do relate. I really do. My heart goes out to you.


----------



## NYCGabriel

CastingPearls said:


> I've lost 4. It never gets easier. They're family and the loss is profound. I'm so sorry, Lulu.
> I had to put down Mr. Peaches (who I considered a kid in a cat-suit) due to liver cancer after chemo for a year and I miss him everyday. I do relate. I really do. My heart goes out to you.


I love that name! Mr. Peaches! got any pictures, Pearls?


----------



## littlefairywren

luscious_lulu said:


> I had to put my cat down today. He had complications due to his diabetes and was suffering. :really sad:



Oh hon, I am so sorry about Rafiki. I know you loved him dearly 
Soft (((((hugs)))))


----------



## mossystate

luscious_lulu said:


> I had to put my cat down today. He had complications due to his diabetes and was suffering. :really sad:



So sorry, lulu.


----------



## HDANGEL15

*i have a relatively brand new car, 3 weeks old, less than 1000 miles on her...and the engine light came on...after the first day...they said they were'nt sure what it was..that they had to remove the manifold.......the worse news was....it was a squirrel/chimpmunk or something that built a nest in there and chewed some wires.......$492 to fix it *


----------



## luscious_lulu

littlefairywren said:


> Oh hon, I am so sorry about Rafiki. I know you loved him dearly
> Soft (((((hugs)))))





mossystate said:


> So sorry, lulu.



Thank you both.


----------



## Lamia

My mom's best friend is in stage 4 and they're trying to plan a trip to Kansas so she can see her siblings that she hasn't seen for a long time. It's planned for July 4th I don't know if she will make it that long. 

She found out she had cancer the day of her best friend's husband's funeral who had been struggling with stage 4 cancer for the previous year. 

I hate cancer.


----------



## OneWickedAngel

luscious_lulu said:


> I had to put my cat down today. He had complications due to his diabetes and was suffering. :really sad:


Aww honey, {{{{hugs}}}} we all know how much you loved Rafiki. I'm so sorry.



Lamia said:


> My mom's best friend is in stage 4 and they're trying to plan a trip to Kansas so she can see her siblings that she hasn't seen for a long time. It's planned for July 4th I don't know if she will make it that long.
> 
> She found out she had cancer the day of her best friend's husband's funeral who had been struggling with stage 4 cancer for the previous year.
> 
> *I hate cancer.*



Ditto! 



HDANGEL15 said:


> *i have a relatively brand new car, 3 weeks old, less than 1000 miles on her...and the engine light came on...after the first day...they said they were'nt sure what it was..that they had to remove the manifold.......the worse news was....it was a squirrel/chimpmunk or something that built a nest in there and chewed some wires.......$492 to fix it *



Damn that sucks! Big time!


----------



## freakyfred

I've had some internet friends stay over this past week. Most fun I've ever had.

But they're gone now. And that makes me sad >:


----------



## CastingPearls

NYCGabriel said:


> oh my god!!!  as a cat owner who lost 3 cats I utterly empathize with you!!!!


Wasn't ignoring you Gabriel...they're all on my digital camera which Spouse is currently in possession off so it will either be one of these days or never whichever strikes his mood.


----------



## luscious_lulu

OneWickedAngel said:


> Aww honey, {{{{hugs}}}} we all know how much you loved Rafiki. I'm so sorry.



Thanks Rai


----------



## willowmoon

I'm sad that my parents had to leave early this morning in order to get a head start out -- they drove up last weekend from Alabama (where they live) and visited me for the week here in Wisconsin. So they had to leave REAL early in the morning in order to minimize dealing with the traffic in Chicago. I miss them already and wish we could spend more time together on a regular basis. I love you Dad and I hope you have a Happy Father's Day! -- John


----------



## Linda

willowmoon said:


> I'm sad that my parents had to leave early this morning in order to get a head start out -- they drove up last weekend from Alabama (where they live) and visited me for the week here in Wisconsin. So they had to leave REAL early in the morning in order to minimize dealing with the traffic in Chicago. I miss them already and wish we could spend more time together on a regular basis. I love you Dad and I hope you have a Happy Father's Day! -- John



I am glad you had a great visit though.  Always sucks when they have to leave.


----------



## MisticalMisty

I bought some stuff to cook on my grill pan today.

Get home..grill pan is in storage. Poot.


----------



## NYCGabriel

I miss my dad (1937 - 2006) and my godfather (1928 - 2008). 





this was taken before he went into the hospital the following week for his non-hodgkin's lymphoma.


----------



## Linda

NYCGabriel said:


> I miss my dad (1937 - 2006) and my godfather (1928 - 2008). QUOTE]
> 
> Sorry. (((((Hugs)))))


----------



## Your Plump Princess

Linda said:


> NYCGabriel said:
> 
> 
> 
> I miss my dad (1937 - 2006) and my godfather (1928 - 2008).
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Sorry. (((((Hugs)))))
Click to expand...

Seconded. 
-More Big Hugs-


----------



## luscious_lulu

NYCGabriel said:


> I miss my dad (1937 - 2006) and my godfather (1928 - 2008).
> 
> 
> 
> 
> this was taken before he went into the hospital the following week for his non-hodgkin's lymphoma.



(((big hugs)))


----------



## littlefairywren

NYCGabriel said:


> I miss my dad (1937 - 2006) and my godfather (1928 - 2008).
> 
> 
> 
> 
> this was taken before he went into the hospital the following week for his non-hodgkin's lymphoma.



Soft ((((hugs))))


----------



## Bearsy

Romance is dead and love is a lie.


----------



## kristineirl

i knew i wasn't the only one :[

interpret that however you want.


----------



## rellis10

I decided to try and amputate the top of my finger while making a sandwich.....owwww! :doh:


----------



## CastingPearls

I just hit the bottom of a bag of hot cheese curls.


----------



## nettie

((( Hugs ))) to you both.



NYCGabriel said:


> I miss my dad (1937 - 2006) and my godfather (1928 - 2008).





kristineirl said:


> i knew i wasn't the only one :[
> 
> interpret that however you want.


----------



## kristineirl

A family member of mine died of a drug overdose and nobody told me until this past Saturday, eight days after he died.


----------



## Micara

kristineirl said:


> A family member of mine died of a drug overdose and nobody told me for until this past Saturday, eight days after he died.



((((Hugs)))) to you. I'm so sorry to hear that.


----------



## willowmoon

kristineirl said:


> A family member of mine died of a drug overdose and nobody told me until this past Saturday, eight days after he died.



I'm so sorry about this as well. Were the two of you pretty close? Either way, I'm sure it hurts.


----------



## Fairia

Moved back into a shared room again. No doubt Armageddon will start there.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

kristineirl said:


> A family member of mine died of a drug overdose and nobody told me until this past Saturday, eight days after he died.


That's horrible! I'm so sorry for your loss. 
May peace find you in your time of grieving.
*Big Hug*


----------



## kristineirl

Micara said:


> ((((Hugs)))) to you. I'm so sorry to hear that.





willowmoon said:


> I'm so sorry about this as well. Were the two of you pretty close? Either way, I'm sure it hurts.





Your Plump Princess said:


> That's horrible! I'm so sorry for your loss.
> May peace find you in your time of grieving.
> *Big Hug*



Willowmoon: we were pretty close, that's why I was so shocked when I wasn't notified. 

All three of you, it means a lot to me that you took the time to send a little message my way. If I could, i'd organize a group hug, for now, I hope you accept my sincere_ thank you_.


----------



## bbwildrose

loneliness is making me sad.


----------



## CastingPearls

kristineirl said:


> A family member of mine died of a drug overdose and nobody told me until this past Saturday, eight days after he died.


Very sorry to hear that, Kristine. My condolences.


----------



## CarlaSixx

The fact that I have to come to a website to feel accepted, and yet STILL not feel any ounce of acceptance, is what is making me sad.


----------



## nettie

kristineirl said:


> A family member of mine died of a drug overdose and nobody told me until this past Saturday, eight days after he died.



Very sorry to hear this, Kristine. Thoughts and prayers going out to you and your family.


----------



## nettie

CarlaSixx said:


> The fact that I have to come to a website to feel accepted, and yet STILL not feel any ounce of acceptance, is what is making me sad.



Girl, from what I've seen you post so far, you are beautiful, smart, and hilarious! And you are certainly loved here.

(((hugs)))


----------



## littlefairywren

kristineirl said:


> A family member of mine died of a drug overdose and nobody told me until this past Saturday, eight days after he died.



I am sorry for you loss, kristineirl. ((((HUGS))))



nettie said:


> Girl, from what I've seen you post so far, you are beautiful, smart, and hilarious! And you are certainly loved here.
> 
> (((hugs)))



Ditto!


----------



## sirGordy

A total lack of compassion and warmth by some members of our human family, but the upside of that, is that there are some that remind us that there is a glimmer of hope for the overall survival of the species.


----------



## spiritangel

feel like lots of big squishy hugs are needed Kristengirl that totally sux and must have come as such a huge shock to you. Sometimes the rhyme and reasons in life escape me

Carlasixx more hugs for you as well, acceptance starts with the self, then works outwards just my take on it 

and hugs to everyone else *You are Amazing Wonderful Caring and Compassionate Souls please dont ever forget who you are and what makes you all wonderful and unique!!!!*


----------



## NYCGabriel

kristineirl said:


> A family member of mine died of a drug overdose and nobody told me until this past Saturday, eight days after he died.



oh god!! that's horrible!  lots of virtual hugs and prayers for you and your family & friends


----------



## Lovelyone

All the hypocrisy in the world today.


----------



## Mystic Rain

I am sad that if the new bill to extend the deadline for the home buyer's tax credit does not pass, I will not be able to get my house.  I really hope it does pass.


----------



## kristineirl

CastingPearls said:


> Very sorry to hear that, Kristine. My condolences.





nettie said:


> Very sorry to hear this, Kristine. Thoughts and prayers going out to you and your family.





littlefairywren said:


> I am sorry for you loss, kristineirl. ((((HUGS))))
> 
> 
> 
> Ditto!





spiritangel said:


> feel like lots of big squishy hugs are needed Kristengirl that totally sux and must have come as such a huge shock to you. Sometimes the rhyme and reasons in life escape me
> 
> Carlasixx more hugs for you as well, acceptance starts with the self, then works outwards just my take on it
> 
> and hugs to everyone else *You are Amazing Wonderful Caring and Compassionate Souls please dont ever forget who you are and what makes you all wonderful and unique!!!!*





NYCGabriel said:


> oh god!! that's horrible!  lots of virtual hugs and prayers for you and your family & friends



you know what, you guys? I have never felt so touched by quasi-strangers (i should probably rephrase that) as I do today. for all of you who have sent me messages, who have replied to my post, i must say thank you again. dealing with this loss hasn't been easy, but your kind words have certainly softened the blow. 

all of you are much appreciated &#9829;


----------



## Your Plump Princess

kristineirl said:


> you know what, you guys? I have never felt so touched by quasi-strangers (i should probably rephrase that) as I do today. for all of you who have sent me messages, who have replied to my post, i must say thank you again. dealing with this loss hasn't been easy, but your kind words have certainly softened the blow.
> 
> all of you are much appreciated &#9829;


&#9829; Your part of the Dims family! &#9829; 
-Super Hug-

What are families for?


----------



## spiritangel

I just found out a friend of mines Son died 

http://apps.facebook.com/blognetworks/blog/joshua_koman/

for the history and info on this brave little soul who drowned and was slowly commming back to life in so many ways, this family has already been through so much and wendy is an amazing woman, this split up her family, caused a huge media circus and now she has lost her little boy, I can only imagine her anguish and in some ways relief that his soul is now free of his somewhat tormented existance, he is a much loved child and my heart breaks for wendy and her family as I write this I have tears streaming down my face. Just such a tragedy


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

spiritangel said:


> I just found out a friend of mines Son died
> 
> http://apps.facebook.com/blognetworks/blog/joshua_koman/
> 
> for the history and info on this brave little soul who drowned and was slowly commming back to life in so many ways, this family has already been through so much and wendy is an amazing woman, this split up her family, caused a huge media circus and now she has lost her little boy, I can only imagine her anguish and in some ways relief that his soul is now free of his somewhat tormented existance, he is a much loved child and my heart breaks for wendy and her family as I write this I have tears streaming down my face. Just such a tragedy



(((HUGS))), sweetie!


----------



## Famouslastwords

kristineirl said:


> A family member of mine died of a drug overdose and nobody told me until this past Saturday, eight days after he died.



Drugs are very...tough to deal with and easy to overdose on. Very few addicts of the hard stuff are ever able to quit and stay off it permanently. Addiction itself is very tough to kick. My parents both died of drug overdoses and although I hated both of them at the time, I really miss my dad.

Someone once told me that if you die with an addiction you take it into the afterlife with you. Your mind craves it but you don't have a body so you cannot fulfill the addiction. 

I think he was just trying to get me to quit masturbating though (I was 16, pshawwwwwwww.)

Either way, I don't believe that. I just brought it up because I was curious if you had heard the same thing.

I'm sorry for your loss.


----------



## nettie

spiritangel said:


> I just found out a friend of mines Son died
> 
> http://apps.facebook.com/blognetworks/blog/joshua_koman/
> 
> for the history and info on this brave little soul who drowned and was slowly commming back to life in so many ways, this family has already been through so much and wendy is an amazing woman, this split up her family, caused a huge media circus and now she has lost her little boy, I can only imagine her anguish and in some ways relief that his soul is now free of his somewhat tormented existance, he is a much loved child and my heart breaks for wendy and her family as I write this I have tears streaming down my face. Just such a tragedy



((( hugs ))) So very sad. Warm thoughts and prayers going out to you and your friend.


----------



## rellis10

Urgh, i feel tired and worn out...my boss is being a total busy-body and it's annoying me.


----------



## HottiMegan

spiritangel said:


> I just found out a friend of mines Son died
> 
> http://apps.facebook.com/blognetworks/blog/joshua_koman/
> 
> for the history and info on this brave little soul who drowned and was slowly commming back to life in so many ways, this family has already been through so much and wendy is an amazing woman, this split up her family, caused a huge media circus and now she has lost her little boy, I can only imagine her anguish and in some ways relief that his soul is now free of his somewhat tormented existance, he is a much loved child and my heart breaks for wendy and her family as I write this I have tears streaming down my face. Just such a tragedy



I am so sorry for you and your friend. {{hugs}}


----------



## ButlerGirl09

My best friend called me tonight to tell me that her husband of less than two years wants a divorce. She's an emotional mess  And I can't be there in person to console her.


----------



## HappyFA75

I found out around 10:30 that there was a death in my family. One of my Cousins. So, im in a state of Odd relaxation, with tears in my eyes.


----------



## Micara

I'm sad that I'm missing hockey's main camp (affectionately dubbed "Man Camp") this weekend because I'll be in friggin' Wisconsin.  Now I can't scope out next season's eye candy.


----------



## Linda

I'm sad because my brother is filing for divorce soon. I hate watching him in this much pain.


----------



## Micara

Just found out that my ex-stepbrother was in a really bad wreck. 

*Off-duty officer injured in crash at 11th and Carpenter*
By Anonymous 
THE STATE JOURNAL-REGISTER
Posted Jul 08, 2010 @ 03:28 PM
An off-duty Springfield police officer was injured this afternoon when a truck collided with the Ford Mustang he was driving.

The officer suffered non life-threatening injuries but was taken by ambulance to the hospital. Emergency workers had to cut off the roof of the Mustang to free him from the wreckage.

The crash happened about 1:30 p.m. at 11th and Carpenter streets. Police said the driver of a truck that was southbound on 11th apparently ran a stop light and hit the side of the Mustang.

The truck driver, whose name was not immediately available, was not injured, police said.

Animal control officers were searching for the officer's dog, a pit bull named Octavius, that escaped during the crash and ran into the neighborhood nearby.


----------



## willowmoon

I'm so sorry to hear that -- sending prayers your way!


----------



## mossystate

The sweat under my boobs.


----------



## MzDeeZyre

That my family is being shitty about me moving....

(As if it isn't hard enough)


----------



## Linda

MzDeeZyre said:


> That my family is being shitty about me moving....
> 
> (As if it isn't hard enough)



If it helps any I am excited!!


----------



## HappyFA75

MzDeeZyre said:


> That my family is being shitty about me moving....
> 
> (As if it isn't hard enough)



I wish you well. I believe in time they will adjust, however my prayers and condolences are with you. (I have been through that. Stay Strong, and it will all come together. Yes You Can.)

They set a date for my Cousin's Funeral too. I will remember him kindly.


----------



## Admiral_Snackbar

Have been following a former co-worker's blog about her fertility, and I just gotta stop reading up on it. They've had 2 unsuccessful IVFs in the past 2 years and a third resulted in a miscarriage at 5 months. The wife has a 17-year-old daughter, so it happened once, but her body doesn't seem to be cooperating with #2 almost 20 years later.

They blogged about the funeral, the little blankie and onesie they put him in. I would assume photos were taken but I didn't see any - I've seen them before on another blog, people passing around the tiny, purplish-blue fetal corpse in a little blue or pink outfit to hold and hug...very very sad, but I guess it brings some form of closure. Never had to directly deal with the death of a neonate or a child, so I am guessing everyone has their coping mechanism.

They just had an IVF transfer that took a few weeks ago, and it's looking like twins. It's just getting tough to see another round of almost overzealous and near obsessive-compulsive hope pipe up and my not wanting to see bad stuff continue to happen to good people; so far the odds haven't been on their side. I figure at this point I can wish them the best but I'm not the most optimistic SOB in the world about anything.

Looking through the group of blogs they link to, it's apparently quite common in the infertility community. I remember how hard it was to discuss ANYTHING with them that remotely involved pregnancy, baby showers or kids in general, not knowing if it would throw them into an emotional tailspin. I remember royally pissing the wife off a few times with some oblique references to the Duggars or Octomom. I sort of figured that anyone in her condition would be irritated by any hyper-fertile situations, but as with many things, I was wrong.

Just hoping a lack of my well-wishes isn't construed as pessimism or bad karma on their part, and I know it's not about me, it's about them and how they are best able to manage their lives through an emotionally heavy online community.


----------



## rellis10

Having had only 3 hours sleep, i caught the bus to work only to find out there had been a big pile up on the way. This caused a long traffic jam, which my bus was stuck in the middle of. After being stuck there for an hour (up to when i was actually supposed to start work) we got diverted out into the middle of nowhere and spent the next hour finding our way back on the original route. Oh, and did i mention i'm travel sick? Yup, two hours on a bus in the countryside on uneven bumpy roads.

Finally got to work an hour late. Sick, Tired and Frustrated.



Rant over.


----------



## annetang

rellis10 said:


> Having had only 3 hours sleep, i caught the bus to work only to find out there had been a big pile up on the way. This caused a long traffic jam, which my bus was stuck in the middle of. After being stuck there for an hour (up to when i was actually supposed to start work) we got diverted out into the middle of nowhere and spent the next hour finding our way back on the original route. Oh, and did i mention i'm travel sick? Yup, two hours on a bus in the countryside on uneven bumpy roads.
> 
> Finally got to work an hour late. Sick, Tired and Frustrated.
> 
> 
> 
> Rant over.



I often get caught in the traffic jam or the subway is late or something else. I'm tired of wasting a long time on the way but have no idea what to do.


----------



## rellis10

annetang said:


> I often get caught in the traffic jam or the subway is late or something else. I'm tired of wasting a long time on the way but have no idea what to do.



I always carry my mp3 player with me to work. It's a 45 minute bus journey normally so i need something to occupy me. Other than that i occasionally try and write a poem or two in a little notebook i have in my coat pocket all the time.

That reminds me...a couple of new poems will be posted later today in the Poetry thread .


----------



## CastingPearls

rellis10 said:


> I always carry my mp3 player with me to work. It's a 45 minute bus journey normally so i need something to occupy me. Other than that i occasionally try and write a poem or two in a little notebook i have in my coat pocket all the time.
> 
> That reminds me...a couple of new poems will be posted later today in the Poetry thread .


I read them. All great, but my favorite was the last. Tried to give you rep but was fresh out.


----------



## rellis10

CastingPearls said:


> I read them. All great, but my favorite was the last. Tried to give you rep but was fresh out.



Damn you rep gods!

Thanks for the compliments CP


----------



## HottiMegan

I get so lonely sometimes. I honestly have no one in my life but my husband and kids. No one else. I get sad when i get lonely. I wish i had some friends.


----------



## cherylharrell

So sad those passing on. Prayers and vibes to all...


----------



## cherylharrell

HottiMegan said:


> I get so lonely sometimes. I honestly have no one in my life but my husband and kids. No one else. I get sad when i get lonely. I wish i had some friends.



We're all your friends on here.


----------



## annetang

HottiMegan said:


> I get so lonely sometimes. I honestly have no one in my life but my husband and kids. No one else. I get sad when i get lonely. I wish i had some friends.



Look around and you would find out what you have owned is far more than you expect.


----------



## annetang

rellis10 said:


> I always carry my mp3 player with me to work. It's a 45 minute bus journey normally so i need something to occupy me. Other than that i occasionally try and write a poem or two in a little notebook i have in my coat pocket all the time.
> 
> That reminds me...a couple of new poems will be posted later today in the Poetry thread .



I also carry my mp3 player with me. 70 minutes on the subway and 10 minutes' walk to arrive the destination. For me, it's a sort of torture. By the way, I can't find the new poetry which you mentioned. Where is it ?


----------



## rellis10

annetang said:


> I also carry my mp3 player with me. 70 minutes on the subway and 10 minutes' walk to arrive the destination. For me, it's a sort of torture. By the way, I can't find the new poetry which you mentioned. Where is it ?



Here you go, hope you like it.

http://www.dimensionsmagazine.com/forums/showthread.php?t=37203&page=4


I got quite emotional earlier today for something quite pathetic. 

The day didnt start off well, before i set off to work my Mum made me feel depressed by asking me whether I thought i'd chosen the right path since leaving school. Her intentions were good but it's a subject that i'm quite hesitant to talk about and like i said it got me depressed. The fact that i'v never managed to actually tell the rest of my family what my real future ambitions are didnt make this any more of an enjoyable experience.

The bus ride to work only gave me more time to dwell on the conversation that got me down even more. By the time i got to work i was pretty damn depressed.

Then it happened. Less than an hour into work and my freshly made cup of tea tipped itself all over a stack of photocopied documents i'd just finished putting together. I cleaned it up sure enough, but when i returned to the kitchen to dispose of my paper towels, i found myself alone for a minute and couldnt help but get emotional. I dont know why that did it, but i almost cried. I choked it back, took a moment, and got back to work...but it's a rare moment when i get like that


----------



## annetang

rellis10 said:


> Here you go, hope you like it.
> 
> http://www.dimensionsmagazine.com/forums/showthread.php?t=37203&page=4
> 
> 
> I got quite emotional earlier today for something quite pathetic.
> 
> The day didnt start off well, before i set off to work my Mum made me feel depressed by asking me whether I thought i'd chosen the right path since leaving school. Her intentions were good but it's a subject that i'm quite hesitant to talk about and like i said it got me depressed. The fact that i'v never managed to actually tell the rest of my family what my real future ambitions are didnt make this any more of an enjoyable experience.
> 
> The bus ride to work only gave me more time to dwell on the conversation that got me down even more. By the time i got to work i was pretty damn depressed.
> 
> Then it happened. Less than an hour into work and my freshly made cup of tea tipped itself all over a stack of photocopied documents i'd just finished putting together. I cleaned it up sure enough, but when i returned to the kitchen to dispose of my paper towels, i found myself alone for a minute and couldnt help but get emotional. I dont know why that did it, but i almost cried. I choked it back, took a moment, and got back to work...but it's a rare moment when i get like that



I'm sorry about that. In fact, I never made a good choice, instead the good choice comes to me. My feeling right now.

Just like your poem says "My future is nestled in my hands", if you were determined to undertake a career, then don't mind what people say about it. It's your choice, not others'. You know yourself, aren't you? You choose what you are and what kind of life you are going to lead. Follow your hearts and keep on trying, you will definitly gain much from it.

May be it's time for you to have a good rest and to shift your focus to other place. Hope you feel better and enjoy your weekend!


----------



## Linda

I am missing my 20th High School Reunion this weekend.
Damn "the man". I am giving up my entire summer for work issues.
Booo I say....Booo!


----------



## spiritangel

My mother just when I have spent this year working on feeling good about myself and my size and learning to re accept myself for who I am I get the phone call tonight 

you know the one was watching blah blah blah and heard about this trial for blah blah blah and thought you should look into it

sets me right back especially with thing darn cold cause I am tired and a little grouchy already oh yeah add girl time to that and there isnt enough chocolate in the world to fix all that at once lol

i did point out for the last 5 years I have been slowly but steadily loosing weight on my own but she just went on with the I knew you would say no you always say no have since a little girl rant

aaaarrrrghhh will not let her make me feel bad about my size!! well I will try not to


----------



## WomanlyHips

Seperation and pending divorce, I feel really lost right now. I know it's all a process and I will come out on the other side of it alright but right now, in the moment, I'm not feeling that.

I secretly hate the idea of dating again, I worry that I will spend the rest of my life alone.

Blah..


----------



## Proner

rellis10 said:


> Here you go, hope you like it.
> 
> http://www.dimensionsmagazine.com/forums/showthread.php?t=37203&page=4
> 
> 
> I got quite emotional earlier today for something quite pathetic.
> 
> The day didnt start off well, before i set off to work my Mum made me feel depressed by asking me whether I thought i'd chosen the right path since leaving school. Her intentions were good but it's a subject that i'm quite hesitant to talk about and like i said it got me depressed. The fact that i'v never managed to actually tell the rest of my family what my real future ambitions are didnt make this any more of an enjoyable experience.
> 
> The bus ride to work only gave me more time to dwell on the conversation that got me down even more. By the time i got to work i was pretty damn depressed.
> 
> Then it happened. Less than an hour into work and my freshly made cup of tea tipped itself all over a stack of photocopied documents i'd just finished putting together. I cleaned it up sure enough, but when i returned to the kitchen to dispose of my paper towels, i found myself alone for a minute and couldnt help but get emotional. I dont know why that did it, but i almost cried. I choked it back, took a moment, and got back to work...but it's a rare moment when i get like that



Sorry to hear that Rellis, but I agree with annetang, if you have chosen a career plan it's your choice and only yours. Of course family and friends could give you advices but at the end it's at you to make the decision and they have to accept it because the choice you made will be the best for you.

So be happy


----------



## Sensualbbwcurves

What is making me sad right now is that I need someone to talk to, and don't have anyone. I tried my Mother, but that was a no go. I honestly don't even know why, Itried to talk to her because she hardly ever listens to me. However just alot of craziness going through my head @ this moment!


----------



## Bearsy

I think I'm gonna end up being a modern day Jay Gatsby. An abundance of party guests but a shortage of funeral attendees.


----------



## Mathias

It's a lot of things, but mainly I'm flat out not happy with the way things are going for me right now.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

The pessimistic part of my brain is beating the stuffing out of my optimistic and hopeful side right now.


----------



## willowmoon

Your Plump Princess said:


> The pessimistic part of my brain is beating the stuffing out of my optimistic and hopeful side right now.



Oh I doubt that, YPP. 

Seriously though, I'm sending hugs your way and hope things work out for you!


----------



## freakyfred

Have to attend a family function and realized my good shirt doesn't fit me anymore. Need to lose a bit of weight >:


----------



## rellis10

A building collapsed onto my bus route home, so i had to wait in the rain for half an hour untill my bus finally arrived and then got diverted the long way round so i finally got home wet and about 45 minutes late


----------



## kristineirl

since i've had this job, every year on my birthday i've gotten a raise, except for this year. arrrrgggg! >_<


----------



## dcoyote

I sad and kind of mad because my well went dry from the drought. I've had no water for weeks. It sucks so bad!! I live with my folks while I'm still in college, and I have two much younger siblings. We've had to have them stay at my grandparent's all this time because of the water situation. I miss having them home so much.


----------



## CastingPearls

dcoyote said:


> I sad and kind of mad because my well went dry from the drought. I've had no water for weeks. It sucks so bad!! I live with my folks while I'm still in college, and I have two much younger siblings. We've had to have them stay at my grandparent's all this time because of the water situation. I miss having them home so much.


So sorry to hear that. Is your well fed from an aquifer that will eventually be refilled or will you have to wait for the drought to end?


----------



## Your Plump Princess

The loss of a very dear friend.
[Not as in death kind of loss, by the way.]


----------



## willowmoon

dcoyote said:


> I sad and kind of mad because my well went dry from the drought. I've had no water for weeks. It sucks so bad!! I live with my folks while I'm still in college, and I have two much younger siblings. We've had to have them stay at my grandparent's all this time because of the water situation. I miss having them home so much.



And all we've had in Wisconsin for the past week is rain, rain, & more rain! I'll trade with you for a little bit if that's cool.


----------



## Mathias

She rejected me. I feel stupid for thinking I'd finally found the one. I'm just crushed right now. :really sad:


----------



## CastingPearls

Mathias said:


> She rejected me. I feel stupid for thinking I'd finally found the one. I'm just crushed right now. :really sad:


Awww Matt. She doesn't know what she's missing. {{{{{Matt}}}}}


----------



## Linda

Mathias said:


> She rejected me. I feel stupid for thinking I'd finally found the one. I'm just crushed right now. :really sad:



So sorry to hear this matt.


----------



## Adamantoise

Mathias said:


> She rejected me. I feel stupid for thinking I'd finally found the one. I'm just crushed right now. :really sad:



Matt,that sucks,mate-I'm sorry. If it's any consolation,I went through rejection earlier this year-it happens. I hope you get over it soon,buddy.


----------



## littlefairywren

Mathias said:


> She rejected me. I feel stupid for thinking I'd finally found the one. I'm just crushed right now. :really sad:



Oh hon, I am so sorry you are hurting. Like Elaine said....she doesn't know what she's lost 

Soft ((((hugs))))


----------



## rellis10

Mathias said:


> She rejected me. I feel stupid for thinking I'd finally found the one. I'm just crushed right now. :really sad:



I'm sorry Mathias, i'm sure there's someone out there waiting for you. You deserve to find that person.


----------



## spiritangel

Mathias said:


> She rejected me. I feel stupid for thinking I'd finally found the one. I'm just crushed right now. :really sad:



Big squishy Hugs, some girls dont see what they are missing out on, you will find her Mathias have patience


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Mathias said:


> She rejected me. I feel stupid for thinking I'd finally found the one. I'm just crushed right now. :really sad:



Sorry to hear that, Matt. The one will come along some day for you.


----------



## Mathias

CastingPearls said:


> Awww Matt. She doesn't know what she's missing. {{{{{Matt}}}}}





Linda said:


> So sorry to hear this matt.





Adamantoise said:


> Matt,that sucks,mate-I'm sorry. If it's any consolation,I went through rejection earlier this year-it happens. I hope you get over it soon,buddy.





littlefairywren said:


> Oh hon, I am so sorry you are hurting. Like Elaine said....she doesn't know what she's lost
> 
> Soft ((((hugs))))





rellis10 said:


> I'm sorry Mathias, i'm sure there's someone out there waiting for you. You deserve to find that person.





spiritangel said:


> Big squishy Hugs, some girls dont see what they are missing out on, you will find her Mathias have patience





MizzSnakeBite said:


> Sorry to hear that, Matt. The one will come along some day for you.



Thank you all so much.


----------



## nettie

Mathias said:


> She rejected me. I feel stupid for thinking I'd finally found the one. I'm just crushed right now. :really sad:



Matt, just adding my hugs to the others. For what it's worth, I think you're fabulous and when the right girl comes along she'll know just how lucky she is.


----------



## luscious_lulu

Mathias said:


> She rejected me. I feel stupid for thinking I'd finally found the one. I'm just crushed right now. :really sad:



You are a sweet man. The right woman will come along. (((hugs)))


----------



## Surlysomething

I lost my sweet, special, amazing friend Sam last night.


My heart is broken.


----------



## CastingPearls

Surlysomething said:


> I lost my sweet, special, amazing friend Sam last night.
> 
> 
> My heart is broken.


I'm so sorry, Surlysomething.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

Mathias said:


> She rejected me. I feel stupid for thinking I'd finally found the one. I'm just crushed right now. :really sad:


She's the stupid one, for passing up such a Gem! 
You'll find your _one_ when you are meant to. -Huggle-


----------



## luscious_lulu

Surlysomething said:


> I lost my sweet, special, amazing friend Sam last night.
> 
> 
> My heart is broken.



(((hugs))) 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Surlysomething said:


> I lost my sweet, special, amazing friend Sam last night.
> 
> 
> My heart is broken.



(((hugs))) I'm so sorry for your loss.


----------



## littlefairywren

Surlysomething said:


> I lost my sweet, special, amazing friend Sam last night.
> 
> 
> My heart is broken.



Surly, I am so sorry to hear of your loss 
(((hugs)))


----------



## Adamantoise

Surlysomething said:


> I lost my sweet, special, amazing friend Sam last night.
> 
> 
> My heart is broken.



You have my deepest sympathies,Miss-what an awful thing to have happen.


----------



## calauria

Today is my Dad's birthday. He passed away a year ago from lung cancer.

I miss him very much.....


----------



## calauria

Mathias said:


> She rejected me. I feel stupid for thinking I'd finally found the one. I'm just crushed right now. :really sad:



Awww.....I'm sorry..I know how that feels. *hugs*


----------



## Surlysomething

Thanks, everyone.

He was a sweet, sweet soul and I will miss him forever.


----------



## calauria

Surlysomething said:


> I lost my sweet, special, amazing friend Sam last night.
> 
> 
> My heart is broken.



I'm so sorry...*hugs*


----------



## Mathias

Surlysomething said:


> I lost my sweet, special, amazing friend Sam last night.
> 
> 
> My heart is broken.



I'm sorry for your loss. My condolences. ((((Hugs))))


----------



## KittyKitten

calauria said:


> Today is my Dad's birthday. He passed away a year ago from lung cancer.
> 
> I miss him very much.....




I'm sorry Cal, dads are so awesome.


----------



## Theresa48

Sad today because someone I love is very depressed and I am at a loss as to how to help him.


----------



## CastingPearls

calauria said:


> Today is my Dad's birthday. He passed away a year ago from lung cancer.
> 
> I miss him very much.....


I'm sorry Calauria. It's hard to lose anyone you love but losing my mom just cut me to the bone. I can really empathize with you.


----------



## Keb

I'm sad because I'm having surgery in 24 days and they're going to have to remove an ovary. Haven't even had a chance to use 'em yet, and I'm going to be down one.


----------



## Rowan

Keb said:


> I'm sad because I'm having surgery in 24 days and they're going to have to remove an ovary. Haven't even had a chance to use 'em yet, and I'm going to be down one.



well doll..you're apparently the kid bearin type..so i feel bad for you in that regard...

i just hope you come out of it okay *big hugs*


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

calauria said:


> Today is my Dad's birthday. He passed away a year ago from lung cancer.
> 
> I miss him very much.....




(((HUGS))), sweetie.



Theresa48 said:


> Sad today because someone I love is very depressed and I am at a loss as to how to help him.



Be there for him, and if he cannot afford for some help, there are lots of free to low-cost mental health places out there. Since he might not be feeling like looking up places, you could call around for him.



Keb said:


> I'm sad because I'm having surgery in 24 days and they're going to have to remove an ovary. Haven't even had a chance to use 'em yet, and I'm going to be down one.



(((HUGS))) Good luck, and I hope you have a speedy recovery.


----------



## mossystate

One ovary is more than plenty to do the job. If you experience no other issues, and all other systems are fine ( including those of your future hubby ) - then you should have nooooo problem having a kid.


----------



## CastingPearls

Keb, I wish you the best of luck with your surgery and also want you to know that I have several friends with one ovary and they had children AFTER they lost one.


----------



## calauria

Thank you Casting Pearls, MizzSnakeBit, and HappyFace83 you ladies are always so nice and encouraging to me. 

Theresa48, just be there for her and let her know you love her and you are important to her.


Keb I hope the surgery will work fine with you. Just like Mossystate, says, one ovary can do the job. *hugs*


----------



## ButlerGirl09

I'm sad that I currently feel like I'm falling apart in so many ways... Physically, emotionally, intellectually, spiritually <sigh>


----------



## annetang

calauria said:


> Today is my Dad's birthday. He passed away a year ago from lung cancer.
> 
> I miss him very much.....



It reminds me of my father too. He was killed by someone 
anonymous on his way to shipping.
I thought I have forgotten how sad I was back in May 30th, 2008. Now...
Condolence to our fathers!


----------



## Lovelyone

ButlerGirl09 said:


> I'm sad that I currently feel like I'm falling apart in so many ways... Physically, emotionally, intellectually, spiritually <sigh>



I feel this way too. Its been one month since my mother passed on and I am feeling the grief as much today as I did the day she passed on. I just keep telling myself that things will get better, the gray clouds will part and the sun will shine through again. We just have to remind ourselves that there is a reason and a time for everything. *sigh.


----------



## mel

feeling sick


----------



## cinnamitch

At approximately this time 4 years ago my mother was murdered. Her live in bf set their house on fire while she was in it. Years of alcohol abuse had affected her and she was on oxygen and was feeble. The fireman found her in the living room, she almost made it out. She was lying on her back with her hands clasped in prayer. She was 63 years old. We had not been in contact for years due to the alcoholism and related issues and i found out quite by accident she had died. The only thing i have left of her are two rings. They are just costume jewelry, nothing of value. I never saw her without those rings ever. When they came to me in the mail and i saw them, and the marks where the fire had left its mark, it hit me she was gone from me forever. We never got to find our way back to one another. So i sit here at 48 years old crying like a baby and missing my Mama.The only comfort i take is that she is where she will never be hurt again and is young and free . I love you Mae Beth Johnson. Your daughter, Cindy


----------



## cherylharrell

So sorry to hear about your mom. Prayers just said for ya. Hang in there. Hugs...


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

cinnamitch said:


> At approximately this time 4 years ago my mother was murdered. Her live in bf set their house on fire while she was in it. Years of alcohol abuse had affected her and she was on oxygen and was feeble. The fireman found her in the living room, she almost made it out. She was lying on her back with her hands clasped in prayer. She was 63 years old. We had not been in contact for years due to the alcoholism and related issues and i found out quite by accident she had died. The only thing i have left of her are two rings. They are just costume jewelry, nothing of value. I never saw her without those rings ever. When they came to me in the mail and i saw them, and the marks where the fire had left its mark, it hit me she was gone from me forever. We never got to find our way back to one another. So i sit here at 48 years old crying like a baby and missing my Mama.The only comfort i take is that she is where she will never be hurt again and is young and free . I love you Mae Beth Johnson. Your daughter, Cindy



4 years feels like nothing when it comes to losing someone we love.  I'm so sorry for your loss, Cindy. Big, gentle hugs coming your way. (((((((((((((Cindy))))))))))))


----------



## Kenster102.5

That makes me so angry to see someone so dispicable do that to your mother. I am really sorry to hear that. Was he ever charged?


----------



## littlefairywren

cinnamitch said:


> At approximately this time 4 years ago my mother was murdered. Her live in bf set their house on fire while she was in it. Years of alcohol abuse had affected her and she was on oxygen and was feeble. The fireman found her in the living room, she almost made it out. She was lying on her back with her hands clasped in prayer. She was 63 years old. We had not been in contact for years due to the alcoholism and related issues and i found out quite by accident she had died. The only thing i have left of her are two rings. They are just costume jewelry, nothing of value. I never saw her without those rings ever. When they came to me in the mail and i saw them, and the marks where the fire had left its mark, it hit me she was gone from me forever. We never got to find our way back to one another. So i sit here at 48 years old crying like a baby and missing my Mama.The only comfort i take is that she is where she will never be hurt again and is young and free . I love you Mae Beth Johnson. Your daughter, Cindy



Cindy, I am so sorry for the loss of your mother and the tragic way she died. (((HUGS)))


----------



## CastingPearls

cinnamitch said:


> At approximately this time 4 years ago my mother was murdered. Her live in bf set their house on fire while she was in it. Years of alcohol abuse had affected her and she was on oxygen and was feeble. The fireman found her in the living room, she almost made it out. She was lying on her back with her hands clasped in prayer. She was 63 years old. We had not been in contact for years due to the alcoholism and related issues and i found out quite by accident she had died. The only thing i have left of her are two rings. They are just costume jewelry, nothing of value. I never saw her without those rings ever. When they came to me in the mail and i saw them, and the marks where the fire had left its mark, it hit me she was gone from me forever. We never got to find our way back to one another. So i sit here at 48 years old crying like a baby and missing my Mama.The only comfort i take is that she is where she will never be hurt again and is young and free . I love you Mae Beth Johnson. Your daughter, Cindy


Cindy, so sorry. Words are not enough.


----------



## mossystate

Cindy, that place where your mom was free and far from the hell of pains...is the place she dreamed of you. You are a kind and fierce woman. Mae Beth is proud. I am so sorry.


----------



## sugar and spice

cinnamitch said:


> At approximately this time 4 years ago my mother was murdered. Her live in bf set their house on fire while she was in it. Years of alcohol abuse had affected her and she was on oxygen and was feeble. The fireman found her in the living room, she almost made it out. She was lying on her back with her hands clasped in prayer. She was 63 years old. We had not been in contact for years due to the alcoholism and related issues and i found out quite by accident she had died. The only thing i have left of her are two rings. They are just costume jewelry, nothing of value. I never saw her without those rings ever. When they came to me in the mail and i saw them, and the marks where the fire had left its mark, it hit me she was gone from me forever. We never got to find our way back to one another. So i sit here at 48 years old crying like a baby and missing my Mama.The only comfort i take is that she is where she will never be hurt again and is young and free . I love you Mae Beth Johnson. Your daughter, Cindy



((((( Cindy ))))) I am so sorry for the pain you're in and the loss of your Mother. I can't imagine how hard it is to deal with all those memories. I'm glad you are trying to focus on how she is someplace now where she is at peace and free. Big soft girl hugs, Fran


----------



## cinnamitch

Kenster102.5 said:


> That makes me so angry to see someone so dispicable do that to your mother. I am really sorry to hear that. Was he ever charged?



No , Some legal wrangling done by his family and he was suddenly diagnosed with alzheimers and ut in a nursing home. Everyone that knew him knew he did not have dementia, but i guess to the state it wasn't worth the effort.


----------



## luscious_lulu

cinnamitch said:


> At approximately this time 4 years ago my mother was murdered. Her live in bf set their house on fire while she was in it. Years of alcohol abuse had affected her and she was on oxygen and was feeble. The fireman found her in the living room, she almost made it out. She was lying on her back with her hands clasped in prayer. She was 63 years old. We had not been in contact for years due to the alcoholism and related issues and i found out quite by accident she had died. The only thing i have left of her are two rings. They are just costume jewelry, nothing of value. I never saw her without those rings ever. When they came to me in the mail and i saw them, and the marks where the fire had left its mark, it hit me she was gone from me forever. We never got to find our way back to one another. So i sit here at 48 years old crying like a baby and missing my Mama.The only comfort i take is that she is where she will never be hurt again and is young and free . I love you Mae Beth Johnson. Your daughter, Cindy




(((hugs)))


----------



## Mathias

cinnamitch said:


> At approximately this time 4 years ago my mother was murdered. Her live in bf set their house on fire while she was in it. Years of alcohol abuse had affected her and she was on oxygen and was feeble. The fireman found her in the living room, she almost made it out. She was lying on her back with her hands clasped in prayer. She was 63 years old. We had not been in contact for years due to the alcoholism and related issues and i found out quite by accident she had died. The only thing i have left of her are two rings. They are just costume jewelry, nothing of value. I never saw her without those rings ever. When they came to me in the mail and i saw them, and the marks where the fire had left its mark, it hit me she was gone from me forever. We never got to find our way back to one another. So i sit here at 48 years old crying like a baby and missing my Mama.The only comfort i take is that she is where she will never be hurt again and is young and free . I love you Mae Beth Johnson. Your daughter, Cindy



I'm so sorry to hear that, Cindy. (((((((((Hugs))))))))))


----------



## Rowan

cinnamitch said:


> At approximately this time 4 years ago my mother was murdered. Her live in bf set their house on fire while she was in it. Years of alcohol abuse had affected her and she was on oxygen and was feeble. The fireman found her in the living room, she almost made it out. She was lying on her back with her hands clasped in prayer. She was 63 years old. We had not been in contact for years due to the alcoholism and related issues and i found out quite by accident she had died. The only thing i have left of her are two rings. They are just costume jewelry, nothing of value. I never saw her without those rings ever. When they came to me in the mail and i saw them, and the marks where the fire had left its mark, it hit me she was gone from me forever. We never got to find our way back to one another. So i sit here at 48 years old crying like a baby and missing my Mama.The only comfort i take is that she is where she will never be hurt again and is young and free . I love you Mae Beth Johnson. Your daughter, Cindy



Oh hon...I'm so sorry to hear this *huge hugs* You'll be in my prayers


----------



## CAMellie

Today would have been my daughter's 11th birthday. She was stillborn in my 8th month. R.I.P. Avery Claire...momma will hold you again someday.


----------



## KittyKitten

I'm so tired of living on this earth right now , I feel like saying f--- the world. I'm tired of the bull..........


----------



## littlefairywren

CAMellie said:


> Today would have been my daughter's 11th birthday. She was stillborn in my 8th month. R.I.P. Avery Claire...momma will hold you again someday.



((((Hugs)))) CAMellie


----------



## SSBBW Katerina

Making me sad/ reflective right now:

I was widowed young & today is my late hubby's birthday. He used to tell me & show me, every hour of the day, that he loved & was IN love with me. He didn't care what size I was. He just wanted me for me. He respected me & denied me nothing. Yet I never asked for much. Lol. RIP my sweet beloved. He was the only man, person, that ever gave a damn about me. When he died, I died. I struggled to hold onto our apt, but was priced out & lost it along with EVERYTHING we ever owned & earned in our lives! I was, and am still sorta homeless. I live w/ friends of a friend & trying to get back on my feet & into my own place. I miss not having my own money, my own sh1t! No agency of any kind will help women like me unless they've got 5 kids, w/ 3 'baby daddies', strapped to their hip or they have to currently be knocked up or are a junkie. I don't even smoke cigarettes. I only burn candles. So I've gotta suffer because I made the conscious decision, as far back as 7th grade, to not want to have kids & be childfree by choice. Thank heavens I did. I'd never want to put kids through what I've been enduring for the past few years.

I curse the day my husband, whom was my boss up until his 3rd proposal [lol], died. I'm learning to live again, possibly allow myself to love & be loved again. I had sex with someone for the first time after so many years on 18 July. If anything I'm glad it was w/ some1 I think genuinely likes me. So it wasn't a wasted moment. That's a good thing and was a tremendous, temporary stress reliever.

There are other things that are making me sad. But missing my L8 hubby & my current living situation top the list @ 1A & 1B.

Wish me success & prosperity & peace of mind & I shall do likewise for all of you. Sincerely.


----------



## littlefairywren

SSBBW Katerina said:


> Making me sad/ reflective right now:
> 
> I was widowed young & today is my late hubby's birthday. He used to tell me & show me, every hour of the day, that he loved & was IN love with me. He didn't care what size I was. He just wanted me for me. He respected me & denied me nothing. Yet I never asked for much. Lol. RIP my sweet beloved. He was the only man, person, that ever gave a damn about me. When he died, I died. I struggled to hold onto our apt, but was priced out & lost it along with EVERYTHING we ever owned & earned in our lives! I was, and am still sorta homeless. I live w/ friends of a friend & trying to get back on my feet & into my own place. I miss not having my own sh1t! And no agency of any kind will help women like me unless they've got 5 kids, w/ 3 'baby daddies', strapped to their hip. so I've gotta suffer because I made the conscious decision, as far back as 7th grade, to not want to have kids & be childfree by choice. Thank heavens I did. I'd never want to put kids through what I've been enduring for the past few years.
> 
> I curse the day my husband, whom was my boss up until his 3rd proposal [lol], died. I'm learning to live again, possibly allow myself to love & be loved again. I had sex with someone for the first time after so many years on 18 July. It if anything I'm glad it was w/ some1 I think genuinely likes me. So it wasn't a wasted moment. That's a good thing a was a tremendous, temporary stress reliever.
> 
> There are other things hat are making me sad. But missing my L8 hubby & my current living situation top the list @ 1A & 1B.
> 
> Wish me success & prosperity & peace of mind & I shall do likewise for all of you. Sincerely.



I wish you happiness and all that you hope for, SBBW Katerina. Soft (((hugs)))


----------



## KittyKitten

Hugs Katerina!

And my situation has been straightened out. I tend to panic too early.


----------



## CastingPearls

SSBBW Katerina said:


> Making me sad/ reflective right now:
> 
> I was widowed young & today is my late hubby's birthday. He used to tell me & show me, every hour of the day, that he loved & was IN love with me. He didn't care what size I was. He just wanted me for me. He respected me & denied me nothing. Yet I never asked for much. Lol. RIP my sweet beloved. He was the only man, person, that ever gave a damn about me. When he died, I died. I struggled to hold onto our apt, but was priced out & lost it along with EVERYTHING we ever owned & earned in our lives! I was, and am still sorta homeless. I live w/ friends of a friend & trying to get back on my feet & into my own place. I miss not having my own money, my own sh1t! No agency of any kind will help women like me unless they've got 5 kids, w/ 3 'baby daddies', strapped to their hip or they have to currently be knocked up or are a junkie. I don't even smoke cigarettes. I only burn candles. So I've gotta suffer because I made the conscious decision, as far back as 7th grade, to not want to have kids & be childfree by choice. Thank heavens I did. I'd never want to put kids through what I've been enduring for the past few years.
> 
> I curse the day my husband, whom was my boss up until his 3rd proposal [lol], died. I'm learning to live again, possibly allow myself to love & be loved again. I had sex with someone for the first time after so many years on 18 July. If anything I'm glad it was w/ some1 I think genuinely likes me. So it wasn't a wasted moment. That's a good thing and was a tremendous, temporary stress reliever.
> 
> There are other things that are making me sad. But missing my L8 hubby & my current living situation top the list @ 1A & 1B.
> 
> Wish me success & prosperity & peace of mind & I shall do likewise for all of you. Sincerely.


I wish you joy unspeakable, peace beyond all understanding, and for your cup to overflow with love.


----------



## kinkykitten

My mothers death 2 weeks ago  Oh how i miss her!


----------



## Linda

kinkykitten said:


> My mothers death 2 weeks ago  Oh how i miss her!



I am so sorry for your loss. (((((((((hugs))))))))))


----------



## cinnamitch

kinkykitten said:


> My mothers death 2 weeks ago  Oh how i miss her!



I am sorry for your loss Sarah. It is so hard to lose a parent. Hold on to your memories of happier times with her and smile through your tears. She is in your heart forever.


----------



## MasterShake

kinkykitten said:


> My mothers death 2 weeks ago  Oh how i miss her!



I can't imagine the loss you're experiencing! My condolences!!


----------



## CastingPearls

kinkykitten said:


> My mothers death 2 weeks ago  Oh how i miss her!


I'm so sorry. Losing my mother was the hardest most profound event of my life. Hugs.


----------



## cherylharrell

So sorry to hear about your mom. Prayers jsut said for ya. Hugs...


----------



## mossystate

kinkykitten said:


> My mothers death 2 weeks ago  Oh how i miss her!



So sorry for the loss of your sweet mom.


----------



## thirtiesgirl

Hugs to Kinkykitten, Katerina and Cinnamitch.


----------



## CastingPearls

Zephyr is still not home. As I type this Wonton is at the window screeching and has been nonstop for days. Daniel has stopped eating and Nacho is eating everything in sight. 

We sighted him today and he is very thin. We tried to coax him into the house and he ran off. He's not eating anything we put out for him. 

Even though it hasn't worked before, we're going to try one more time with a have-a-heart trap. We're hoping he's so tired and hungry he'll just step inside and this will all be over.


----------



## Fairia

Realizing how hypocritical the world is despite what we're told by loved ones. Or even the hypocrisy from our loved ones that might have screwed us up royally. Also doesn't help when you have almost every mental disorder under the sun and not being seen as capable because of it.


----------



## littlefairywren

kinkykitten said:


> My mothers death 2 weeks ago  Oh how i miss her!



I am sorry for the loss of your mother, kinkykitten. (((((hugs)))))


----------



## littlefairywren

CastingPearls said:


> Zephyr is still not home. As I type this Wonton is at the window screeching and has been nonstop for days. Daniel has stopped eating and Nacho is eating everything in sight.
> 
> We sighted him today and he is very thin. We tried to coax him into the house and he ran off. He's not eating anything we put out for him.
> 
> Even though it hasn't worked before, we're going to try one more time with a have-a-heart trap. We're hoping he's so tired and hungry he'll just step inside and this will all be over.



Oh, my fingers are still crossed that he will come home! Maybe Wonton's constant screeching will help too. Come home little Zephyr, your momma is missing you!!


----------



## Rowan

I am so sorry for your loss hon *huge hugs*
I am envious that you had a love like that and I hope to find something similar for myself someday. I also feel your frustration about not being able to get help unless you push out a bunch of kids to exploit the system. 

I'm glad you found our little community here and I am sending you light and love and my best wishes and will keep you in my prayers. *More hugs*

Rowan




SSBBW Katerina said:


> Making me sad/ reflective right now:
> 
> I was widowed young & today is my late hubby's birthday. He used to tell me & show me, every hour of the day, that he loved & was IN love with me. He didn't care what size I was. He just wanted me for me. He respected me & denied me nothing. Yet I never asked for much. Lol. RIP my sweet beloved. He was the only man, person, that ever gave a damn about me. When he died, I died. I struggled to hold onto our apt, but was priced out & lost it along with EVERYTHING we ever owned & earned in our lives! I was, and am still sorta homeless. I live w/ friends of a friend & trying to get back on my feet & into my own place. I miss not having my own money, my own sh1t! No agency of any kind will help women like me unless they've got 5 kids, w/ 3 'baby daddies', strapped to their hip or they have to currently be knocked up or are a junkie. I don't even smoke cigarettes. I only burn candles. So I've gotta suffer because I made the conscious decision, as far back as 7th grade, to not want to have kids & be childfree by choice. Thank heavens I did. I'd never want to put kids through what I've been enduring for the past few years.
> 
> I curse the day my husband, whom was my boss up until his 3rd proposal [lol], died. I'm learning to live again, possibly allow myself to love & be loved again. I had sex with someone for the first time after so many years on 18 July. If anything I'm glad it was w/ some1 I think genuinely likes me. So it wasn't a wasted moment. That's a good thing and was a tremendous, temporary stress reliever.
> 
> There are other things that are making me sad. But missing my L8 hubby & my current living situation top the list @ 1A & 1B.
> 
> Wish me success & prosperity & peace of mind & I shall do likewise for all of you. Sincerely.


----------



## Rowan

kinkykitten said:


> My mothers death 2 weeks ago  Oh how i miss her!



Kinky...I'm so sorry to hear this *hugs* If you need anyone to talk, feel free to message me hon.

*huge hugs*


----------



## Britty

There is so much loss and sadness here that I feel selfish to whine about my own personal thing...

but I feel really, truly alone tonight. Sad and lonely and missing something that doesn't have a name.


----------



## Rowan

Britty said:


> There is so much loss and sadness here that I feel selfish to whine about my own personal thing...
> 
> but I feel really, truly alone tonight. Sad and lonely and missing something that doesn't have a name.



Your sadness is just as important as anyone elses sweetheart...you sharing is not selfish at all!

I know how you feel though. Sometimes, even out of the blue, I will have complete and total anguish hit me because i felt like i was alone in the world with no hope to find love or acceptance. Thankfully, I've been able to pull myself up by my bootstraps and keep trying. It's all I can do.

If you need an ear, feel free to message me hon *hugs*


----------



## Micara

I awoke to a phone call from my mom this morning. My 17-year-old cousin, whom I was very close to, was at a party on the 3rd floor of an apartment building. It had stormed most of the night, and she went to step out onto the balcony, slipped, and fell over the edge. She died almost instantly. 

My daughter was also very close to her- their birthdays were a couple of weeks apart and they always celebrated their birthdays together. I thought she had a very bright future- she was very bubbly and outgoing. From a young age she always used her own money to buy everyone Christmas presents. I will miss her so very much.


----------



## Mathias

Micara said:


> I awoke to a phone call from my mom this morning. My 17-year-old cousin, whom I was very close to, was at a party on the 3rd floor of an apartment building. It had stormed most of the night, and she went to step out onto the balcony, slipped, and fell over the edge. She died almost instantly.
> 
> My daughter was also very close to her- their birthdays were a couple of weeks apart and they always celebrated their birthdays together. I thought she had a very bright future- she was very bubbly and outgoing. From a young age she always used her own money to buy everyone Christmas presents. I will miss her so very much.



Oh my God Michele. (((((((Hugs))))) I'm so sorry for your loss.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Oh, Micara. There just aren't even words for this. I am so, so sorry. ((((((((((Micara))))))))))


----------



## HappyFA75

I am mad that there are a bunch of flies and fleas in this stupid house that are EATING ME ALIVE when i sleep and now all the Mosquitoes are out and im killing them one by one, and i need to figure out how to get hidden Fleas out of my clothes. This 5 weeks before i move in to my luxury apartment. Im about to open up a CAN on these Bugs..


----------



## CastingPearls

Micara said:


> I awoke to a phone call from my mom this morning. My 17-year-old cousin, whom I was very close to, was at a party on the 3rd floor of an apartment building. It had stormed most of the night, and she went to step out onto the balcony, slipped, and fell over the edge. She died almost instantly.
> 
> My daughter was also very close to her- their birthdays were a couple of weeks apart and they always celebrated their birthdays together. I thought she had a very bright future- she was very bubbly and outgoing. From a young age she always used her own money to buy everyone Christmas presents. I will miss her so very much.


Michele, I'm so SO sorry.


----------



## Micara

CastingPearls said:


> Michele, I'm so SO sorry.





Mathias said:


> Oh my God Michele. (((((((Hugs))))) I'm so sorry for your loss.





BigBeautifulMe said:


> Oh, Micara. There just aren't even words for this. I am so, so sorry. ((((((((((Micara))))))))))



Thank you all so much for your kind words. I really appreciate them. I still can't believe it. I keep waiting to wake up.


----------



## CAMellie

What's making me truly sad right now is: my father is dying...and I really couldn't care less.
The fact that I don't care makes me sad.


----------



## littlefairywren

Micara said:


> I awoke to a phone call from my mom this morning. My 17-year-old cousin, whom I was very close to, was at a party on the 3rd floor of an apartment building. It had stormed most of the night, and she went to step out onto the balcony, slipped, and fell over the edge. She died almost instantly.
> 
> My daughter was also very close to her- their birthdays were a couple of weeks apart and they always celebrated their birthdays together. I thought she had a very bright future- she was very bubbly and outgoing. From a young age she always used her own money to buy everyone Christmas presents. I will miss her so very much.



Michele, I am so very sorry for your loss 
Soft ((hugs))


----------



## supersoup

Micara, I am so so sorry for your loss. That is so tragic, and so heartbreaking. My condolences to you and your family.


----------



## Britty

Micara said:


> I awoke to a phone call from my mom this morning. My 17-year-old cousin, whom I was very close to, was at a party on the 3rd floor of an apartment building. It had stormed most of the night, and she went to step out onto the balcony, slipped, and fell over the edge. She died almost instantly.
> 
> My daughter was also very close to her- their birthdays were a couple of weeks apart and they always celebrated their birthdays together. I thought she had a very bright future- she was very bubbly and outgoing. From a young age she always used her own money to buy everyone Christmas presents. I will miss her so very much.



What a beautiful girl she was. I'm so deeply sorry for your loss. I'm thinking of you and your family.


----------



## Weirdo890

Micara said:


> Thank you all so much for your kind words. I really appreciate them. I still can't believe it. I keep waiting to wake up.



I wish I could be by your side right now. I want to be with you during this time.


----------



## BrownDown09

I'm sad because I'm scared to go out in the world and take the bull by its horns...also I don't know what to do with my life...


----------



## HottiMegan

I'm sad because we just went in for Max's preop for his 13th surgery. 13 f'in surgeries, how much should one little kid endure?! He is going to have a bone graft put into his little ear to build it into a more "normal" ear. There is a chance that all this pain and expense we're going through could be for not if his ear rejects the bone graft! I am sad that my little guy has had so much to deal with since being born. I wish i could take it all away and have the suffering myself. There is no end in site for surgeries either. He will most likely have a few on his legs in his teens because he has a leg length discrepancy. I kind of get down around surgery time for my little guy wishing his life was a little easier.


----------



## kinkykitten

Thank you so much for the condolences everyone :wubu:

My Mom was my best friend, she is sadly and truely missed... but she isn't suffering anymore <3


----------



## HappyFA75

Out of Chinese food.


----------



## sirGordy

Just got an ugly reminder of a past hurt done to me, and trying to sort it out without getting overly sad about it


----------



## MasterShake

Loneliness is starting to get the better of me. Don't know how much more I can take before I go crazy.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

I'm sad because I suspect my grandmothers pug will have to be put to sleep soon. 

They are taking him to the vet today, because he is only eating a little bit, and won't go by my grandma or my aunt. My aunt suspects he has a fever, and my grandma said when they went for a walk earlier this morning, that he looked/felt weak.. 


..He's my little cuddle-pug.


----------



## watts63

That I have no dreams & ambitions of what I want to do with my life. Every time I think about it, I see nothing. Probably because I'm afraid of change.


----------



## rellis10

watts63 said:


> That I have no dreams & ambitions of what I want to do with my life. Every time I think about it, I see nothing. Probably because I'm afraid of change.



I am somewhat the same. I used to have no idea what i wanted to do just like you. Now i have the idea...i'm just afraid to try and do it. Trust me, my friend, you are not alone in feeling like this. If you ever need to chat/vent to somebody like-minded, don't be afraid to shoot me a pm


----------



## Duchess of York

Just buried my mom today. She fought a courageous battle of breast cancer. I will miss her terribly. :really sad::goodbye:


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

I'm so sorry for your loss, Yorkie.


----------



## Duchess of York

Thanks, BBMe.


----------



## Surlysomething

Duchess of York said:


> Just buried my mom today. She fought a courageous battle of breast cancer. I will miss her terribly. :really sad::goodbye:




I'm very sorry for your loss. 

I lost my Mom to cancer as well....


----------



## HottiMegan

Duchess of York said:


> Just buried my mom today. She fought a courageous battle of breast cancer. I will miss her terribly. :really sad::goodbye:



I am so sorry for your loss.


----------



## CastingPearls

Duchess of York said:


> Just buried my mom today. She fought a courageous battle of breast cancer. I will miss her terribly. :really sad::goodbye:


So very sorry. Yorkie.


----------



## Fuzzy

Sorry for your loss, Yorkie. They're always gone too soon.


----------



## Scorsese86

I know, I know, I have no reason to complain, but I don't know where else to post it. I feel lonely. Which saddens me. I spend way too much time for myself, really, and I have no idea what to do, which also confuses me. Sorry for the self-pity.


----------



## CastingPearls

Ivan..... If I could hug you for real, I would. {{{{{Ivan}}}}}


----------



## Scorsese86

CastingPearls said:


> Ivan..... If I could hug you for real, I would. {{{{{Ivan}}}}}



Thank you, Elaine. You're so sweet. That made me feel better.


----------



## Rowan

Somehow I got screwed up financially and now $500 in the hole. I have no idea what im going to do. I was supposed to move this weekend, but I dont think that will happen, since what money i was hoping to get from financial aid will now have to go to fix my finances. SO...I may just be homeless..who the hell knows. 

Im supposed to start a new job tomorrow, but i'd just as soon not wake up at all and just fucking die in my sleep. I'm tired of getting crushed by life over and over again


----------



## watts63

My childish behavior. When I get frustrated, it's like I never grew up at all .


----------



## GTAFA

watts63 said:


> My childish behavior. When I get frustrated, it's like I never grew up at all .



You're a big man to say that. I am in denial about my own tantrums:doh:.


----------



## Webmaster

Rowan said:


> Somehow I got screwed up financially and now $500 in the hole. I have no idea what im going to do. I was supposed to move this weekend, but I dont think that will happen, since what money i was hoping to get from financial aid will now have to go to fix my finances. SO...I may just be homeless..who the hell knows.
> 
> Im supposed to start a new job tomorrow, but i'd just as soon not wake up at all and just fucking die in my sleep. I'm tired of getting crushed by life over and over again



My goodness. I hope this all works out for you. It somehow always does. Never give up hope.


----------



## watts63

GTAFA said:


> You're a big man to say that. I am in denial about my own tantrums:doh:.



But when I have those tantrums, I don't feel like a big man at all. I feel more like a big-ass kid & it crushes my self-confidence even more.


----------



## Rowan

Webmaster said:


> My goodness. I hope this all works out for you. It somehow always does. Never give up hope.



Thanks hon...thankfully God is faithful and I managed to make it to even ground, but its going to mean working my new full time job at the cable company, plus my job I was at, but part time, and on top of all of this, 12 credit hours in school. I got two of about 5 disbursements of financial aid and that allowed me to bring the account to two dollars in the black and just enough to move in to my new apartment tomorrow. 

He is a good God, but its awful hard not to get down sometimes!


----------



## GTAFA

watts63 said:


> But when I have those tantrums, I don't feel like a big man at all. I feel more like a big-ass kid & it crushes my self-confidence even more.



Sometimes denial is just a river in Egypt ...but there's no denying that when we dwell on our pains, our failures, they seem bigger. If you can get your mind off of what's bothering you, there's a chance to scoop up a positive from the negative. Ever see a ball game where a team tries to at least score a touchdown or some runs, to salvage a game that's already lost? They may never catch up, but scoring a few runs makes you feel better than staring at the scoreboard, thinking you'll never beat anyone ever ever ever. Start small. If you can't win, at least see if you can put some points on the board (or the equivalent in your life). I get pleasure playing the piano & singing. I cut the grass and enjoy feeling i've made something a little prettier. While we may still lose the game, one can feel better if one at least puts a few points on the board (or the equivalent).


----------



## CastingPearls

Today is the second anniversary of my baby sister Lisa's death. She was 35 and my best friend. I miss her a lot.


----------



## thirtiesgirl

Hugs, CP. So tough to go through.


----------



## Micara

I just found out that one of my good friends from high school passed away. She was such a sweet person, and got me through more than one day of my awful teenage years. 

I don't know what it is lately. I'm really tired of losing people that I care about.


----------



## spiritangel

Micara said:


> I just found out that one of my good friends from high school passed away. She was such a sweet person, and got me through more than one day of my awful teenage years.
> 
> I don't know what it is lately. I'm really tired of losing people that I care about.



Hugs Micara it seems like you barely have time to fully grieve one loss please take care of yourself, here if you need a shoulder friend ect ect 

wish there was a way to help to ease the pain take heart they are angels now and still live within your heart and soul


----------



## OneWickedAngel

CastingPearls said:


> Today is the second anniversary of my baby sister Lisa's death. She was 35 and my best friend. I miss her a lot.





Micara said:


> I just found out that one of my good friends from high school passed away. She was such a sweet person, and got me through more than one day of my awful teenage years.
> 
> I don't know what it is lately. I'm really tired of losing people that I care about.



Hugs to you both CP and 'Cara. :wubu:


----------



## luscious_lulu

CastingPearls said:


> Today is the second anniversary of my baby sister Lisa's death. She was 35 and my best friend. I miss her a lot.



(((hugs))) so sorry...


----------



## willowmoon

Rowan said:


> Thanks hon...thankfully God is faithful and I managed to make it to even ground, but its going to mean working my new full time job at the cable company, plus my job I was at, but part time, and on top of all of this, 12 credit hours in school. I got two of about 5 disbursements of financial aid and that allowed me to bring the account to two dollars in the black and just enough to move in to my new apartment tomorrow.
> 
> He is a good God, but its awful hard not to get down sometimes!



Glad things are somewhat turning around for you ... hope you manage to get some sleep in there sometime!


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

CastingPearls said:


> Today is the second anniversary of my baby sister Lisa's death. She was 35 and my best friend. I miss her a lot.





Micara said:


> I just found out that one of my good friends from high school passed away. She was such a sweet person, and got me through more than one day of my awful teenage years.
> 
> I don't know what it is lately. I'm really tired of losing people that I care about.



(((hugs))) to you both


----------



## HottiMegan

Rowan said:


> Thanks hon...thankfully God is faithful and I managed to make it to even ground, but its going to mean working my new full time job at the cable company, plus my job I was at, but part time, and on top of all of this, 12 credit hours in school. I got two of about 5 disbursements of financial aid and that allowed me to bring the account to two dollars in the black and just enough to move in to my new apartment tomorrow.
> 
> He is a good God, but its awful hard not to get down sometimes!



i'm glad it worked out for you. I know it's going to be tight financially for you until payday. I loath money and all things financial. It's such a bummer.


----------



## HottiMegan

My sad is sort of petty compared to everyone's here. I'm just sad that I haven't had a weekend with hubby to speak of. He's on call this weekend and keeps getting called back into the hospital. I haven't gotten to see him and i miss him. I have had some emotional stuff going on and he is my rock to make me feel safe and secure, he's not here and it just sucks.


----------



## CastingPearls

No....your sad is not petty. No one's is. ((((Hugs))))


----------



## Saoirse

Rev. Terry Jones makes me sad. Im actually crying.

I dont hate him, or his followers, but I do feel incredible pity and sadness for them, and anyone that thinks like them.

There is already so much anger and hate... why the need to add to it, just because you can?

This is not how things are supposed to go.


----------



## HottiMegan

I wholeheartedly agree with you Saoirse. I am so saddened by the situation. I hurt for the poor people at the brunt of such hate that are just trying to live their lives.


----------



## spiritangel

Saoirse said:


> Rev. Terry Jones makes me sad. Im actually crying.
> 
> I dont hate him, or his followers, but I do feel incredible pity and sadness for them, and anyone that thinks like them.
> 
> There is already so much anger and hate... why the need to add to it, just because you can?
> 
> This is not how things are supposed to go.



I totally agree it makes me feel ill that in a day and age where peaceful protesting has been proven to work at times, this has to happen or that people believe they have the right to diss someone elses beliefs because they are different or evil, if that were the case I would be burning at the stake as a witch......................... crazy world


----------



## CastingPearls

I'm very upset and frustrated because my laptop has a bad virus and has to be reloaded. This will take all day and it's in the hands of someone I don't particularly trust but am basically in a bind. 

Also, because I'm upset and frustrated, my stomach is in knots. 

FML


----------



## luscious_lulu

CastingPearls said:


> I'm very upset and frustrated because my laptop has a bad virus and has to be reloaded. This will take all day and it's in the hands of someone I don't particularly trust but am basically in a bind.
> 
> Also, because I'm upset and frustrated, my stomach is in knots.
> 
> FML



(((hugs)))


----------



## rellis10

Back off my holiday for tommorow (i have monday off though) and i have a feeling it's going to be a bad day at work.


----------



## Lovelyone

loneliness. I live in a house full of people, have lots of friends, try to fill my free time with busy work, talk with God, and still feel as if I am completely and utterly alone in the world. Tomorrow I might feel differently, but today..not so much.


----------



## littlefairywren

Letting down my guard, starting to trust someone and then end up feeling like a fool. If you tell me you're a nice guy, then behave like one!


----------



## OneWickedAngel

{{{{{{{{{{ Lainey, Lulu, Rells, Lovely and Wren }}}}}}}}}}

Hugs! 
Sending ridiculous amounts of happy, happy, joy, joy vibes to you all!


----------



## spiritangel

littlefairywren said:


> Letting down my guard, starting to trust someone and then end up feeling like a fool. If you tell me you're a nice guy, then behave like one!



hugs LFW what a jerk.


----------



## activistfatgirl

I'm sad for a couple of folks dealing with debilitating fear, who consistently post about needing to get away from home but not knowing how to make the first step. I'm sad because I've been captured by fear and insecurity a few times in my life, but getting through that and soaring into life has been such a blessing. I want others to experience that, standing on your own two feet in the world, tough as it is sometimes.


----------



## Shosh

Lovelyone said:


> loneliness. I live in a house full of people, have lots of friends, try to fill my free time with busy work, talk with God, and still feel as if I am completely and utterly alone in the world. Tomorrow I might feel differently, but today..not so much.



I am so sorry to hear this T.

xoxo


----------



## Shosh

My mother's dog was diagnosed with renal failure today. She does not have much longer.
We all feel so teary right now.


----------



## mimosa

Oh my....I am sorry Susannah. XOXO Sending love and hugs to you, your mom and her doggie. :kiss2:





Shosh said:


> My mother's dog was diagnosed with renal failure today. She does not have much longer.
> We all feel so teary right now.


----------



## mimosa

Yeah, I understand. *big hugs*





Lovelyone said:


> loneliness. I live in a house full of people, have lots of friends, try to fill my free time with busy work, talk with God, and still feel as if I am completely and utterly alone in the world. Tomorrow I might feel differently, but today..not so much.


----------



## littlefairywren

OneWickedAngel said:


> {{{{{{{{{{ Lainey, Lulu, Rells, Lovely and Wren }}}}}}}}}}
> 
> Hugs!
> Sending ridiculous amounts of happy, happy, joy, joy vibes to you all!





spiritangel said:


> hugs LFW what a jerk.



Thanks lovely ladies, I am good....vented and sorted :happy:


----------



## rellis10

rellis10 said:


> Back off my holiday for tommorow (i have monday off though) and i have a feeling it's going to be a bad day at work.



And guess what.....I was right to have that feeling 

As soon as I got into work I was annoyed hugely. Apparently during my four days off the bosses had decided with no input from myself AT ALL to move me from the job and location i've only just got used to. So as of monday i'll be back in the craggy old building they have, working in a cramped and stuffy office, doing something completely new.

Right now I have the compulsion to scream profanities at anybody who gets near me....but I shall restrain myself.


----------



## spiritangel

rellis10 said:


> And guess what.....I was right to have that feeling
> 
> As soon as I got into work I was annoyed hugely. Apparently during my four days off the bosses had decided with no input from myself AT ALL to move me from the job and location i've only just got used to. So as of monday i'll be back in the craggy old building they have, working in a cramped and stuffy office, doing something completely new.
> 
> Right now I have the compulsion to scream profanities at anybody who gets near me....but I shall restrain myself.



oh dear, that sux you might want to erm bring some pics from home or some such to make it a little better and mayby you could perhaps move some of the stuff that isnt needed out of the office (even if you have to sneak it out)

Sorry to hear that Rick hate it when those feelings are confimed always sux


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

rellis10 said:


> And guess what.....I was right to have that feeling
> 
> As soon as I got into work I was annoyed hugely. Apparently during my four days off the bosses had decided with no input from myself AT ALL to move me from the job and location i've only just got used to. So as of monday i'll be back in the craggy old building they have, working in a cramped and stuffy office, doing something completely new.
> 
> Right now I have the compulsion to scream profanities at anybody who gets near me....but I shall restrain myself.



I'm so sorry to hear this. I hope your new position is better than the last. Maybe bring in a plant or two to help liven up the space?

You know, maybe it would be a good idea to scream and let it out? Of course, not while you're at work. lol


----------



## rellis10

spiritangel said:


> oh dear, that sux you might want to erm bring some pics from home or some such to make it a little better and mayby you could perhaps move some of the stuff that isnt needed out of the office (even if you have to sneak it out)
> 
> Sorry to hear that Rick hate it when those feelings are confimed always sux





MizzSnakeBite said:


> I'm so sorry to hear this. I hope your new position is better than the last. Maybe bring in a plant or two to help liven up the space?
> 
> You know, maybe it would be a good idea to scream and let it out? Of course, not while you're at work. lol




Thanks for the help girls, i'm feeling quite a bit better now...even after a bit of an odd spell a bit ago but still better


----------



## Lovelyone

Shosh said:


> My mother's dog was diagnosed with renal failure today. She does not have much longer.
> We all feel so teary right now.



I am so sorry to hear that Shosh. ((((HUGS))))


----------



## CastingPearls

Shosh said:


> My mother's dog was diagnosed with renal failure today. She does not have much longer.
> We all feel so teary right now.


So sorry Shosh. (((((Shosh)))))


----------



## CastingPearls

littlefairywren said:


> Letting down my guard, starting to trust someone and then end up feeling like a fool. If you tell me you're a nice guy, then behave like one!


His loss. Doesn't know what he's missing. ((((LFW))))


----------



## thirtiesgirl

I'm sad because I have to work tomorrow, on Saturday, for free.

I hate the start of the school year.


----------



## Shosh

I want to thank all those who expressed concern and care for my mum's doggie.

Milly was put to sleep about an hour ago.

She is in doggie heaven now.


----------



## spiritangel

Shosh said:


> I want to thank all those who expressed concern and care for my mum's doggie.
> 
> Milly was put to sleep about an hour ago.
> 
> She is in doggie heaven now.



Hugs shosh, I am so sorry to hear that, but glad she is no longer in pain, your mother must be heartbroken

It took my mum over a month to tell me she had had to put out last dog down because she couldnt do it she was to heartbroken, 

I am so sorry to hear you have lost a member of your family

big squishy hugs


----------



## Melted Tabasco

This is.  











8:46, 9:03, 9:59 and 10:29 a.m.


----------



## Shosh

Milly

Sleep peacefully.

View attachment Milly and me.jpg


View attachment Obama dog.jpg


----------



## Your Plump Princess

Today is the 9th anniversary of the tragic 9/11 terrorist attacks. I didn't lose anyone personally, but my cousin who lived in NYC did. I can't imagine, and everytime I'm reminded like today... I end up crying. 
I hate being so emotional.


----------



## GTAFA

Your Plump Princess said:


> Today is the 9th anniversary of the tragic 9/11 terrorist attacks. I didn't lose anyone personally, but my cousin who lived in NYC did. I can't imagine, and everytime I'm reminded like today... I end up crying.
> I hate being so emotional.



This performance took place in November 2001. It was as inspiring then as now: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=deOTNggaUBY 

Everytime, i am watching it through tears: and I'm not even American.


----------



## mimosa

Shosh said:


> Milly
> 
> Sleep peacefully.
> 
> View attachment 84485
> 
> 
> View attachment 84486



I am sorry, sweet darling. XOXO:kiss2:


----------



## mimosa

New shirt + fat rolls + sitting down = busted button. 

I felt like a busted can of biscuit dough. :doh:


----------



## Proner

I just learned that Claude Chabrol is dead, he was an amazing actor and film director


----------



## luscious_lulu

Shosh said:


> I want to thank all those who expressed concern and care for my mum's doggie.
> 
> Milly was put to sleep about an hour ago.
> 
> She is in doggie heaven now.



(((Hugs)))


----------



## Mishty

the Pretenders are singing Brass in Pocket and I thought of Rhonda. 
She loved this song so much, god she loved the 80's.


----------



## HottiMegan

I just want Max's surgery to be over. I want that anxiety that's been building to be over. I want him to be safe in my arms post surgery. I cried in hubby's arms for a long time last night with my fears about this surgery. I am not afraid of the surgery itself, it's the going under. He aspirated in December and spent some time in the hospital. I don't want him to aspirate or something worse. (aspiration is breathing in spit, vomit or some other liquid)


----------



## rellis10

For various reasons, work was extremely trying today.

Late bus, stupid school kids on the bus that finally arrived, computer broke down regularly, new duties confused the hell out of me, got a headache around lunch that just killed me....and I also had a feeling that I wont go into but amounted to what felt like a huge nervous knot in my stomach.

I will say this though, there is alot of happiness bubbling under the surface at the moment for me. I'm just not sure how to show it with everything else running around my head.


----------



## AuntHen

rellis10 said:


> For various reasons, work was extremely trying today.
> 
> Late bus, stupid school kids on the bus that finally arrived, computer broke down regularly, new duties confused the hell out of me, got a headache around lunch that just killed me....and I also had a feeling that I wont go into but amounted to what felt like a huge nervous knot in my stomach.
> 
> I will say this though, there is alot of happiness bubbling under the surface at the moment for me. I'm just not sure how to show it with everything else running around my head.



awww  I hope tomorrow is brighter and whatever is bubbling ends up overflowing :happy:


----------



## ButlerGirl09

Having quote possibly the worst day on record:

Found out my brother stole my credit card and also memorized my debit card numbers essentially draining my bank accounts

Got news that my grandmother's health is really failing and she doesn't have much time left

Heard a rumor that my dad is cheating on my mother

And lastly I found out that one of my graduate school professors/research mentor suddenly died over the weekend of a heart-attack

I think this is too dramatic for even a soap opera! Ughhhhh  I'm waving the white flag here, life! I need a break...


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

ButlerGirl09 said:


> Having quote possibly the worst day on record:
> 
> Found out my brother stole my credit card and also memorized my debit card numbers essentially draining my bank accounts
> 
> Got news that my grandmother's health is really failing and she doesn't have much time left
> 
> Heard a rumor that my dad is cheating on my mother
> 
> And lastly I found out that one of my graduate school professors/research mentor suddenly died over the weekend of a heart-attack
> 
> I think this is too dramatic for even a soap opera! Ughhhhh  I'm waving the white flag here, life! I need a break...



Oh hell.  I'm so sorry. 

(((hugs)))


----------



## littlefairywren

ButlerGirl09 said:


> Having quote possibly the worst day on record:
> 
> Found out my brother stole my credit card and also memorized my debit card numbers essentially draining my bank accounts
> 
> Got news that my grandmother's health is really failing and she doesn't have much time left
> 
> Heard a rumor that my dad is cheating on my mother
> 
> And lastly I found out that one of my graduate school professors/research mentor suddenly died over the weekend of a heart-attack
> 
> I think this is too dramatic for even a soap opera! Ughhhhh  I'm waving the white flag here, life! I need a break...



Oh hon, I'm so sorry you are having such a dreadful time. Lots of (((hugs)))


----------



## spiritangel

ButlerGirl09 said:


> Having quote possibly the worst day on record:
> 
> Found out my brother stole my credit card and also memorized my debit card numbers essentially draining my bank accounts
> 
> Got news that my grandmother's health is really failing and she doesn't have much time left
> 
> Heard a rumor that my dad is cheating on my mother
> 
> And lastly I found out that one of my graduate school professors/research mentor suddenly died over the weekend of a heart-attack
> 
> I think this is too dramatic for even a soap opera! Ughhhhh  I'm waving the white flag here, life! I need a break...



omg ouch what a day that is just wow can we hunt your brother down and bitch slap him for you??

Big squishy hugs that is I am lost for words hugs


----------



## ButlerGirl09

littlefairywren said:


> Oh hon, I'm so sorry you are having such a dreadful time. Lots of (((hugs)))





spiritangel said:


> omg ouch what a day that is just wow can we hunt your brother down and bitch slap him for you??
> 
> Big squishy hugs that is I am lost for words hugs



Thank you so so much ladies! It really is helpful to feel your outpouring of love and support--Means so much to me. <hugs right back atcha>

And yes spirit, please do find him and smack the shit out of him! The guy needs a wakeup call...


----------



## CastingPearls

Wednesdays always make me sad.


----------



## JerseyGirl07093

CastingPearls said:


> Wednesdays always make me sad.



But Wednesday is hump day!


----------



## blubberismanly

Wanting to talk to someone who doesn't want to talk to me...

Being overqualified for every job I'm never hired for...

Sleeping until (at least) noon and not being able to sleep at night like a fucking vampire...

Haven't had s--_been single_--over a year, and it's not looking promising..


----------



## blubberismanly

Oh yeah, and I have almost no social life outside the internet. When I came home (from being in the army and away for 16 months) I found out almost all my friends were either gone or not my friend anymore. It's...well, saddening.


----------



## GTAFA

blubberismanly said:


> Oh yeah, and I have almost no social life outside the internet. When I came home (from being in the army and away for 16 months) I found out almost all my friends were either gone or not my friend anymore. It's...well, saddening.



The same thing happens to others (moi for example) without such a noble adventure. Look at the bright side. If they don't want to be your friends, you don't really want them as your friends, and arguably they never were your true friends, or they'd stand by you. You just haven't found your new circle yet. But they're out there.


----------



## activistfatgirl

that I feel pretty damn alone in the world right now. While I have a HUGE network of contacts and many, many people know me or my work, I have very few friends that live in my city these days. Between relationships ending and people moving on, I feel like I've got next to nothing left here and I'm just really ready for a new life.


----------



## Agent 007

Both my grandparents (from my mother's side) died in the past few months. I miss the wonderful times I had whenever I visited them. Their funerals were difficult moments, but it was also heart-warming to see the family together and realize how close they are. It makes me feel proud of my grandparents when I see the children they raised.
I take comfort in my belief that my grandparents are now together again.


----------



## Mikaila

Big hugs for everyone who is feeling down *hugs*


----------



## Captain Save

All my favorite things (espresso maker, computer, auto) are in storage, so that I can't peruse Dims for hours on end (one of my favorite activities). 

Compared to the issues others here are facing, mine seems like just an inconvenience, even though it still bothers me.


----------



## CastingPearls

I feel sad, tired, dejected, discouraged, confused, lonely and now, sick


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

I know you don't want commisseration, Elaine, but can I offer you hugs?

(((((((((((((((((((Elaine)))))))))))))))))))))))))


----------



## Lovelyone

ButlerGirl09 said:


> Having quote possibly the worst day on record:
> 
> Found out my brother stole my credit card and also memorized my debit card numbers essentially draining my bank accounts
> 
> Got news that my grandmother's health is really failing and she doesn't have much time left
> 
> Heard a rumor that my dad is cheating on my mother
> 
> And lastly I found out that one of my graduate school professors/research mentor suddenly died over the weekend of a heart-attack
> 
> I think this is too dramatic for even a soap opera! Ughhhhh  I'm waving the white flag here, life! I need a break...


 
A similar thing happened to my mom when she was living. Two of her grandchildren took her ATM card and punched out money so they they could "party, drink, and buy pot". They punched out the money and slipped her card back into her purse. In the meanwhile, mom tried paying bills with money that she did not have because they had stolen from her (this happeneded 2 times). She asked the bank what had happened and they told her that some withdrawals had happened a couple of weeks before in the evening after 10 pm. I think she realized that someone had stolen her card--so she bluffed them. She made an announcement in front of everyone in the family and said that she was working with the bank on getting pictures printed out of the people who used her card to take the money out of her account and when she found out WHO did it..she would be prosecuting them to the fullest extent of the law. The sheer worry about being prosecuted and put in jail made the culprits admit their offense. They paid back what they took but she never trusted them again. Stealing from ANYONE is a terrible thing, but to steal from an ailing grandma who would have done anything to help you if she could...even to her own detriment--to me is the lowest of the low.


----------



## GTAFA

Pardon me if i win the award for the pettiest post in the history of this thread...

But i was peeved to see _Glee _tonight. Rachel, the cute girl with a little bit of chubbiness in her face appears to have lost 20 pounds. My imagination? i don't think so. I couldn't help wondering, is it her choice, is it the pressure of the producers (she's the lead of the show)? I am disappointed.


----------



## Fuzzy

anonymous suicidal person that I can't tell if she's serious or not.. and doesn't read a word I say..


----------



## singingNerd79

I'm currently in the middle of a divorce  This is definitely a sad time. Despite me being the one to initiate the separation and divorce, it's not a pain-free time. Who would have thought I'd end up here? It all comes down to a couple of things... I believe, for one, she never *truly* liked me or loved me. That's hard to swallow, but not hard to believe. Mostly because I never *truly* liked or loved her either. She presents herself in such a way that's such a stark contrast to who she actually was, not many people really know the real her. I'd say she borders on multiple personalities, it's that bad. There were constant attitudes to put up with, based on these magic expectations she had of me... based on her years of dreaming up the ideal man, and writing it all down and keeping it in journals. All these points of "perfection" that I was supposed to fit squarely into. All of these unspoken requests and desires, some minuscule, some grand... some hinged on her relationship with her grandfather or step father, some hinged on movies and television. I could never live up, and I suffered for it. Day in and day out, I was greeted with an attitude over some failing or shortcoming that I would have no idea about. I'd ask, and no real answer was given... everything was roundabout.

At the end of the day, I was not who she wanted, and she was definitely not who I wanted. She however, in her delusion (as far as I'm concerned) believes "that's what marriage is"... to be with someone you can't stand on a daily basis, but you just "make it work". For me, there was no "making it work". I was tired of compromising, and always trying, while her version of that included still having an attitude about everything, just trying not to show it as often or as vividly.

I could go on and on... she never trusted me, she wasn't honest with me, everything I did was wrong, nothing I did was good enough... all I did was take care of her, she didn't have to work, she got everything she wanted plus my time... and I got attitudes and anger in return because I didn't do something small and stupid a certain way she thought I should have... ugh, let me stop. At the end of the day, my point is... even though I'm the one to say "enough is enough", doesn't make it a less painful experience. Yes, there is the freedom that I don't have to go through what I've been through the last 3 years anymore... but then there is the inevitability of loneliness and sadness, the rift between "our" friends, the split from her family members, the judgment that will be placed on me as "the bad guy", feeling like no one is on my side, and ultimately feeling like real love is ever elusive.

So that is what's making me sad right now  I have a feeling there is another situation that's about to make me even sadder, but I wont say anything about that prematurely. Gotta have some optimism, right?


----------



## Mishty

Three years ago I adopted a min-pin from a friend of a friend, I named her Roxie, and she was perfect.





When Roxie was a little over a year old and scheduled to be fixed she got pregnant by a Jack Russel. Somehow instead of upset my parents and me got really excited. Roxie had 3 puppies, we kept the girl and named her Rosie and she was lovely. 





Rosie was lovely and red, with blond min-pin markings. She only lived 3 months before getting parvo within hours because the disease was so far gone, she died on November 12(, 6 days after my birthday,) it was bad. We still had Roxie, who was a true Lady, but she was lonely.
We had given the runt to my best friend and she said to calm my Mama down we could have him back. So now we have Rocky, and he was spunky and howled like a little hound dog. 





He made Roxie less lonely, and I fell hed over heels in love with him, singin' Rocket Man, and he would howl along. Adorable. So a few days after the parvo incident,on Thanksgiving Roxie was hit by a car and killed instantly. We had Rocky, but Mama was pretty much bottomed out and things got ugly without Roxie. It's so beautiful the relationship between dog and man, until the dog is gone, and it just didn't fair. 
It's been almost a year now since "the Girls" died and Rocky, well if a dog could be a gentleman, than Rocky is a Duke to be sure. Tonight, my Mama and me were coming home at almost dark and Rocky ran to the car, and we ran over him.
I've called and called the vet, the Pet911 number is busy, and Mama is in her bed with Rocky in a blanket and he's barely breathing, I think he already stopped but she's being so loud, I just think I should let her mourn, but it's just.... I don't know. I think I'm done with pets. This is just to much. 



I'm not sure sad even covers it right now, but I had to get my mind away from it...so, here. This probably sounds like a jumble of bullshit, but i made me feel better.


----------



## spiritangel

Mishty said:


> Three years ago I adopted a min-pin from a friend of a friend, I named her Roxie, and she was perfect.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> When Roxie was a little over a year old and scheduled to be fixed she got pregnant by a Jack Russel. Somehow instead of upset my parents and me got really excited. Roxie had 3 puppies, we kept the girl and named her Rosie and she was lovely.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Rosie was lovely and red, with blond min-pin markings. She only lived 3 months before getting parvo within hours because the disease was so far gone, she died on November 12(, 6 days after my birthday,) it was bad. We still had Roxie, who was a true Lady, but she was lonely.
> We had given the runt to my best friend and she said to calm my Mama down we could have him back. So now we have Rocky, and he was spunky and howled like a little hound dog.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> He made Roxie less lonely, and I fell hed over heels in love with him, singin' Rocket Man, and he would howl along. Adorable. So a few days after the parvo incident,on Thanksgiving Roxie was hit by a car and killed instantly. We had Rocky, but Mama was pretty much bottomed out and things got ugly without Roxie. It's so beautiful the relationship between dog and man, until the dog is gone, and it just didn't fair.
> It's been almost a year now since "the Girls" died and Rocky, well if a dog could be a gentleman, than Rocky is a Duke to be sure. Tonight, my Mama and me were coming home at almost dark and Rocky ran to the car, and we ran over him.
> I've called and called the vet, the Pet911 number is busy, and Mama is in her bed with Rocky in a blanket and he's barely breathing, I think he already stopped but she's being so loud, I just think I should let her mourn, but it's just.... I don't know. I think I'm done with pets. This is just to much.
> 
> 
> 
> I'm not sure sad even covers it right now, but I had to get my mind away from it...so, here. This probably sounds like a jumble of bullshit, but i made me feel better.



oh mishty my heart is breaking for you both right now, no words can express nor take away the pain of loosing a loved one animal or person

big squishy hugs


----------



## Proner

Mishty said:


> Three years ago I adopted a min-pin from a friend of a friend, I named her Roxie, and she was perfect.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> When Roxie was a little over a year old and scheduled to be fixed she got pregnant by a Jack Russel. Somehow instead of upset my parents and me got really excited. Roxie had 3 puppies, we kept the girl and named her Rosie and she was lovely.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Rosie was lovely and red, with blond min-pin markings. She only lived 3 months before getting parvo within hours because the disease was so far gone, she died on November 12(, 6 days after my birthday,) it was bad. We still had Roxie, who was a true Lady, but she was lonely.
> We had given the runt to my best friend and she said to calm my Mama down we could have him back. So now we have Rocky, and he was spunky and howled like a little hound dog.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> He made Roxie less lonely, and I fell hed over heels in love with him, singin' Rocket Man, and he would howl along. Adorable. So a few days after the parvo incident,on Thanksgiving Roxie was hit by a car and killed instantly. We had Rocky, but Mama was pretty much bottomed out and things got ugly without Roxie. It's so beautiful the relationship between dog and man, until the dog is gone, and it just didn't fair.
> It's been almost a year now since "the Girls" died and Rocky, well if a dog could be a gentleman, than Rocky is a Duke to be sure. Tonight, my Mama and me were coming home at almost dark and Rocky ran to the car, and we ran over him.
> I've called and called the vet, the Pet911 number is busy, and Mama is in her bed with Rocky in a blanket and he's barely breathing, I think he already stopped but she's being so loud, I just think I should let her mourn, but it's just.... I don't know. I think I'm done with pets. This is just to much.
> 
> 
> 
> I'm not sure sad even covers it right now, but I had to get my mind away from it...so, here. This probably sounds like a jumble of bullshit, but i made me feel better.



I'm very sorry to hear that  *hugs*

I'm sad because I just came back to hospital where I went to see my first soccer's coach, he have Alzheimer and now he doesn't even remember he was soocer's coach...


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Mishty said:


> Three years ago I adopted a min-pin from a friend of a friend, I named her Roxie, and she was perfect.
> 
> When Roxie was a little over a year old and scheduled to be fixed she got pregnant by a Jack Russel. Somehow instead of upset my parents and me got really excited. Roxie had 3 puppies, we kept the girl and named her Rosie and she was lovely.
> 
> 
> Rosie was lovely and red, with blond min-pin markings. She only lived 3 months before getting parvo within hours because the disease was so far gone, she died on November 12(, 6 days after my birthday,) it was bad. We still had Roxie, who was a true Lady, but she was lonely.
> We had given the runt to my best friend and she said to calm my Mama down we could have him back. So now we have Rocky, and he was spunky and howled like a little hound dog.
> 
> He made Roxie less lonely, and I fell hed over heels in love with him, singin' Rocket Man, and he would howl along. Adorable. So a few days after the parvo incident,on Thanksgiving Roxie was hit by a car and killed instantly. We had Rocky, but Mama was pretty much bottomed out and things got ugly without Roxie. It's so beautiful the relationship between dog and man, until the dog is gone, and it just didn't fair.
> It's been almost a year now since "the Girls" died and Rocky, well if a dog could be a gentleman, than Rocky is a Duke to be sure. Tonight, my Mama and me were coming home at almost dark and Rocky ran to the car, and we ran over him.
> I've called and called the vet, the Pet911 number is busy, and Mama is in her bed with Rocky in a blanket and he's barely breathing, I think he already stopped but she's being so loud, I just think I should let her mourn, but it's just.... I don't know. I think I'm done with pets. This is just to much.
> 
> 
> 
> I'm not sure sad even covers it right now, but I had to get my mind away from it...so, here. This probably sounds like a jumble of bullshit, but i made me feel better.



Oh sweetheart..... I'm so, so sorry.  

I totally understand your feelings about feeling like you're done with having pets. It's like every time one passes, they take a piece of you with them. August 1st was the second anniversary of both of my dogs having to be put to sleep, and I miss them terribly. I don't know if I'll ever be able to have dogs again. It's such a profound loss.

(((hugs)))

ETA: Love the pics; they're beyond adorable.



Proner said:


> ***snip***
> 
> I'm sad because I just came back to hospital where I went to see my first soccer's coach, he have Alzheimer and now he doesn't even remember he was soocer's coach...



(((hugs))) to you too, Mister.


----------



## spiritangel

Proner said:


> I'm very sorry to hear that  *hugs*
> 
> I'm sad because I just came back to hospital where I went to see my first soccer's coach, he have Alzheimer and now he doesn't even remember he was soocer's coach...



aww hugs proner, not fun at all but the fact you took the time to visit is a testament to how amazing a man you are.


----------



## littlefairywren

Mishty said:


> Three years ago I adopted a min-pin from a friend of a friend, I named her Roxie, and she was perfect.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> When Roxie was a little over a year old and scheduled to be fixed she got pregnant by a Jack Russel. Somehow instead of upset my parents and me got really excited. Roxie had 3 puppies, we kept the girl and named her Rosie and she was lovely.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Rosie was lovely and red, with blond min-pin markings. She only lived 3 months before getting parvo within hours because the disease was so far gone, she died on November 12(, 6 days after my birthday,) it was bad. We still had Roxie, who was a true Lady, but she was lonely.
> We had given the runt to my best friend and she said to calm my Mama down we could have him back. So now we have Rocky, and he was spunky and howled like a little hound dog.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> He made Roxie less lonely, and I fell hed over heels in love with him, singin' Rocket Man, and he would howl along. Adorable. So a few days after the parvo incident,on Thanksgiving Roxie was hit by a car and killed instantly. We had Rocky, but Mama was pretty much bottomed out and things got ugly without Roxie. It's so beautiful the relationship between dog and man, until the dog is gone, and it just didn't fair.
> It's been almost a year now since "the Girls" died and Rocky, well if a dog could be a gentleman, than Rocky is a Duke to be sure. Tonight, my Mama and me were coming home at almost dark and Rocky ran to the car, and we ran over him.
> I've called and called the vet, the Pet911 number is busy, and Mama is in her bed with Rocky in a blanket and he's barely breathing, I think he already stopped but she's being so loud, I just think I should let her mourn, but it's just.... I don't know. I think I'm done with pets. This is just to much.
> 
> 
> 
> I'm not sure sad even covers it right now, but I had to get my mind away from it...so, here. This probably sounds like a jumble of bullshit, but i made me feel better.



Oh god, I am so so sorry  Softest of hugs, Mishty.


----------



## Surlysomething

Mishty said:


> I've called and called the vet, the Pet911 number is busy, and Mama is in her bed with Rocky in a blanket and he's barely breathing, I think he already stopped but she's being so loud, I just think I should let her mourn, but it's just.... I don't know. I think I'm done with pets. This is just to much.


 
 I'm so sorry. I've dealt with quite a bit of pet loss and it can be so heartbreaking.


----------



## CastingPearls

Mishty said:


> Three years ago I adopted a min-pin from a friend of a friend, I named her Roxie, and she was perfect.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> When Roxie was a little over a year old and scheduled to be fixed she got pregnant by a Jack Russel. Somehow instead of upset my parents and me got really excited. Roxie had 3 puppies, we kept the girl and named her Rosie and she was lovely.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Rosie was lovely and red, with blond min-pin markings. She only lived 3 months before getting parvo within hours because the disease was so far gone, she died on November 12(, 6 days after my birthday,) it was bad. We still had Roxie, who was a true Lady, but she was lonely.
> We had given the runt to my best friend and she said to calm my Mama down we could have him back. So now we have Rocky, and he was spunky and howled like a little hound dog.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> He made Roxie less lonely, and I fell hed over heels in love with him, singin' Rocket Man, and he would howl along. Adorable. So a few days after the parvo incident,on Thanksgiving Roxie was hit by a car and killed instantly. We had Rocky, but Mama was pretty much bottomed out and things got ugly without Roxie. It's so beautiful the relationship between dog and man, until the dog is gone, and it just didn't fair.
> It's been almost a year now since "the Girls" died and Rocky, well if a dog could be a gentleman, than Rocky is a Duke to be sure. Tonight, my Mama and me were coming home at almost dark and Rocky ran to the car, and we ran over him.
> I've called and called the vet, the Pet911 number is busy, and Mama is in her bed with Rocky in a blanket and he's barely breathing, I think he already stopped but she's being so loud, I just think I should let her mourn, but it's just.... I don't know. I think I'm done with pets. This is just to much.
> 
> 
> 
> I'm not sure sad even covers it right now, but I had to get my mind away from it...so, here. This probably sounds like a jumble of bullshit, but i made me feel better.


Sweet baby, I'm so sorry this happened to you and your Mama. If you need to talk, you know how to find me. (((((Misty)))))


----------



## braindeadhead

I could point to a few things but if I had to sum it up in one word it would be "me".


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

My birthday.....or lack thereof.


----------



## spiritangel

MizzSnakeBite said:


> My birthday.....or lack thereof.



big squishy hugs Devi, that is often the case with me on my birthday, hence the reason for taking myself off to a meditation retreat (and being extremely grateful that itis by donation so I can give what I can afford to for it) so that I wouldnt be alone

Remember we love you and think you are amazing I am so sorry your birthday sucked,


----------



## CastingPearls

MizzSnakeBite said:


> My birthday.....or lack thereof.


Oh hugs, Devi. That was my birthday too this year. (((((((Devi)))))))) I promised myself it would be the last bad or even uneventful birthday I ever had. And I intend to keep that promise.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

spiritangel said:


> big squishy hugs Devi, that is often the case with me on my birthday, hence the reason for taking myself off to a meditation retreat (and being extremely grateful that itis by donation so I can give what I can afford to for it) so that I wouldnt be alone
> 
> Remember we love you and think you are amazing I am so sorry your birthday sucked,



Thanks, Ms. Amanda. I guess what upsets me the most is every year, for my mom's birthday, she gets something, and I take her out to dinner (or make something if that's what she wants). 

I usually get myself something for my birthday, since I almost always don't get anything, but I'm trying to save money. I was really wanting some birthday cake. Oh well.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

CastingPearls said:


> Oh hugs, Devi. That was my birthday too this year. (((((((Devi)))))))) I promised myself it would be the last bad or even uneventful birthday I ever had. And I intend to keep that promise.



Thanks, Elaine .


----------



## littlefairywren

MizzSnakeBite said:


> My birthday.....or lack thereof.



Soft hugs for my (((((Devi)))))
Just remember, you are very much loved. Come hell or high water, I am going to make it to you one day and we will celebrate in style :wubu:


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

littlefairywren said:


> Soft hugs for my (((((Devi)))))
> Just remember, you are very much loved. Come hell or high water, I am going to make it to you one day and we will celebrate in style :wubu:



Thank you, buttercup. :wubu:


----------



## AuntHen

Today is my younger sister who died's birthday... she was so beautiful and radiant inside and out 

I miss and love you Erica!!!


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

fat9276 said:


> Today is my younger sister who died's birthday... she was so beautiful and radiant inside and out
> 
> I miss and love you Erica!!!



I'm so sorry for your loss. (((hugs)))


----------



## CastingPearls

fat9276 said:


> Today is my younger sister who died's birthday... she was so beautiful and radiant inside and out
> 
> I miss and love you Erica!!!


{{{{{{hugs}}}}}} I know your pain, sweetie.


----------



## littlefairywren

fat9276 said:


> Today is my younger sister who died's birthday... she was so beautiful and radiant inside and out
> 
> I miss and love you Erica!!!



((((Hugs)))) for you, darling B


----------



## AuntHen

MizzSnakeBite said:


> I'm so sorry for your loss. (((hugs)))





CastingPearls said:


> {{{{{{hugs}}}}}} I know your pain, sweetie.





littlefairywren said:


> ((((Hugs)))) for you, darling B




thank you ladies


----------



## Surlysomething

My complete lack of energy.




and distances...


----------



## CastingPearls

500 friggin miles.


----------



## littlefairywren

CastingPearls said:


> 500 friggin miles.



*Hugs* Elaine!!


----------



## HottiMegan

We went to the craniofacial team today. I knew that there would be 2 more surgeries to complete his ear transformation. Now they're talking about at least 2 more surgeries on his jaw and several orthodontic procedures in the coming years.. I thought we were at the end of the road for surgeries. I'm so sad because it is scarier every time he gets that one more exposure to anesthesia. I'm so tired of hospitals. Thank God that Alex is healthy as a horse. Max sees enough doctors for 5 kids.


----------



## littlefairywren

HottiMegan said:


> We went to the craniofacial team today. I knew that there would be 2 more surgeries to complete his ear transformation. Now they're talking about at least 2 more surgeries on his jaw and several orthodontic procedures in the coming years.. I thought we were at the end of the road for surgeries. I'm so sad because it is scarier every time he gets that one more exposure to anesthesia. I'm so tired of hospitals. Thank God that Alex is healthy as a horse. Max sees enough doctors for 5 kids.



(((Hugs))) to you, Megan and for your dear wee Max. Sending happy vibes your way.


----------



## spiritangel

HottiMegan said:


> We went to the craniofacial team today. I knew that there would be 2 more surgeries to complete his ear transformation. Now they're talking about at least 2 more surgeries on his jaw and several orthodontic procedures in the coming years.. I thought we were at the end of the road for surgeries. I'm so sad because it is scarier every time he gets that one more exposure to anesthesia. I'm so tired of hospitals. Thank God that Alex is healthy as a horse. Max sees enough doctors for 5 kids.



So very very sorry to hear this Megan, what an amazing and strong family you are to endure all this 

Big squishy hugs


----------



## HottiMegan

littlefairywren said:


> (((Hugs))) to you, Megan and for your dear wee Max. Sending happy vibes your way.





spiritangel said:


> So very very sorry to hear this Megan, what an amazing and strong family you are to endure all this
> 
> Big squishy hugs



Thanks. Sometimes it just gets to me how much my little boy has endured. He is so strong and brave. I just wish he didn't have to be. If i could go through it for him, i would totally do it in a heartbeat. i know some of the pain he's going to go through. The orthodontics i had to do and i know how that sucks to not be able to eat anything but soft stuff for three to four days after an adjustment.


----------



## watts63

I decided to stay home for Thanksgiving while my family leaves for Kansas City. For some reason, it will probably be the first of many Thanksgivings I'll have by myself.


----------



## AuntHen

watts63 said:


> I decided to stay home for Thanksgiving while my family leaves for Kansas City. For some reason, it will probably be the first of many Thanksgivings I'll have by myself.




aww sorry for that.. but just make a lot of food and stuff yourself silly...that would make me happy...especially w/ homemade pumpkin pie around


----------



## watts63

fat9276 said:


> aww sorry for that.. but just make a lot of food and stuff yourself silly...that would make me happy...especially w/ homemade pumpkin pie around



I would if I knew how to cook.


----------



## AmazingAmy

I just restarted my computer to find all of my photos have vanished; even the Vista images are gone. I'm panicky enough to cry and don't know what the fuck to do... a whole year of family photos gone, and I have no clue how to get them back. Down to PC World tomorrow, but why do I feel like they won't help?


----------



## Donna

Before you take it to a professional for a (more than likely costly, possibly unnecessary) recovery, try to do a system restore to a couple of days ago. Look for "System Restore" in your programs file and choose either "recommended restore" or choose a custom date. 

Good luck.


----------



## TraciJo67

My mother is really struggling. She has been diagnosed with early-onset dementia, probable Alzheimer's, and it's clear that she's slipping. She is unable to create new memories, although she is still oriented to time and place, and is still able to care for herself. But we're seeing signs that she's deteriorating in that area too. Her nuerologist told her today that she has to stop driving, and that he's submitting a recommendation to that effect to the DMV. It is very necessary, but she doesn't understand the scope of her cognitive losses and she's angry and frustrated and mostly very anxious and afraid of the loss of her independence. I wish that she didn't have to go through this, that we didn't have to watch her suffer and lose pieces of herself. I am also sad and frustrated and angry. I just don't know who or what to be angry with.

On second thought: Mossy? Can I use you as a punching bag?


----------



## mossystate

No.

I am sorry to hear about your mom.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

TraciJo67 said:


> My mother is really struggling. She has been diagnosed with early-onset dementia, probable Alzheimer's, and it's clear that she's slipping. She is unable to create new memories, although she is still oriented to time and place, and is still able to care for herself. But we're seeing signs that she's deteriorating in that area too. Her nuerologist told her today that she has to stop driving, and that he's submitting a recommendation to that effect to the DMV. It is very necessary, but she doesn't understand the scope of her cognitive losses and she's angry and frustrated and mostly very anxious and afraid of the loss of her independence. I wish that she didn't have to go through this, that we didn't have to watch her suffer and lose pieces of herself. I am also sad and frustrated and angry. I just don't know who or what to be angry with.
> 
> On second thought: Mossy? Can I use you as a punching bag?



I'm so sorry, TJ.


----------



## Linda

TraciJo67 said:


> My mother is really struggling. She has been diagnosed with early-onset dementia, probable Alzheimer's, and it's clear that she's slipping. She is unable to create new memories, although she is still oriented to time and place, and is still able to care for herself. But we're seeing signs that she's deteriorating in that area too. Her nuerologist told her today that she has to stop driving, and that he's submitting a recommendation to that effect to the DMV. It is very necessary, but she doesn't understand the scope of her cognitive losses and she's angry and frustrated and mostly very anxious and afraid of the loss of her independence. I wish that she didn't have to go through this, that we didn't have to watch her suffer and lose pieces of herself. I am also sad and frustrated and angry. I just don't know who or what to be angry with.
> 
> On second thought: Mossy? Can I use you as a punching bag?



So sorry to hear about your mom. It is hard to watch our parents go through these things and have the tables turn to where they no longer can be the strong ones for us, but rather we need to be the ones who take care of them. (((( tight hugs)))) I'm sorry.


----------



## succubus_dxb

my dad is in hospital in Qatar, all on his own. We're all a day's flying away. They think he has Dengue fever, and are running the tests now. I'm scared for him, and hope he cooperates with the doctors- agreeing with medical professionals is not something my family is good at :/


----------



## littlefairywren

TraciJo67 said:


> My mother is really struggling. She has been diagnosed with early-onset dementia, probable Alzheimer's, and it's clear that she's slipping. She is unable to create new memories, although she is still oriented to time and place, and is still able to care for herself. But we're seeing signs that she's deteriorating in that area too. Her nuerologist told her today that she has to stop driving, and that he's submitting a recommendation to that effect to the DMV. It is very necessary, but she doesn't understand the scope of her cognitive losses and she's angry and frustrated and mostly very anxious and afraid of the loss of her independence. I wish that she didn't have to go through this, that we didn't have to watch her suffer and lose pieces of herself. I am also sad and frustrated and angry. I just don't know who or what to be angry with.
> 
> On second thought: Mossy? Can I use you as a punching bag?



I am so sorry that you're having to "lose" your mum this way. It's a hard thing to watch someone you love, disappear into their own world. ((((TraciJo)))



succubus_dxb said:


> my dad is in hospital in Qatar, all on his own. We're all a day's flying away. They think he has Dengue fever, and are running the tests now. I'm scared for him, and hope he cooperates with the doctors- agreeing with medical professionals is not something my family is good at :/



Sending your dad healing vibes, Bobbie. Soft hugs, honey.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

succubus_dxb said:


> my dad is in hospital in Qatar, all on his own. We're all a day's flying away. They think he has Dengue fever, and are running the tests now. I'm scared for him, and hope he cooperates with the doctors- agreeing with medical professionals is not something my family is good at :/



I hope he heals quickly and lets the doctors do what the need to do.

(((hugs)))


----------



## PamelaLois

Just found out last night that my oldest friend's husband was diagnosed with Glioblastoma Multiforme on Saturday. He was sitting in his office in hospital trying to read patient charts (he's a doc) and realized that he couldn't read, didn't understand the words, and then he had a horrible headache. He went downstairs to the ER and said he thought he was having a stroke. The did a bunch of tests and the CT scan showed a tumor the size of a lemon in his brain. Glioblastoma is the cancer that killed Ted Kennedy. It's incurable, almost untreatable. A diagnosis is a death sentence. At best, with all the best care, he may have 1 1/2 years. Likely much less. He's young, in his mid 40s, just recently married to my friend, whom I've known since we were 5 years old and she showed me where the bus stop was for kindergarten. She's devastated, he's been told he can't practice medicine anymore, so now he's out of work. Treatment can cost as much as half a million dollars, how do you pay for that? I feel so bad for her.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

PamelaLois said:


> Just found out last night that my oldest friend's husband was diagnosed with Glioblastoma Multiforme on Saturday. He was sitting in his office in hospital trying to read patient charts (he's a doc) and realized that he couldn't read, didn't understand the words, and then he had a horrible headache. He went downstairs to the ER and said he thought he was having a stroke. The did a bunch of tests and the CT scan showed a tumor the size of a lemon in his brain. Glioblastoma is the cancer that killed Ted Kennedy. It's incurable, almost untreatable. A diagnosis is a death sentence. At best, with all the best care, he may have 1 1/2 years. Likely much less. He's young, in his mid 40s, just recently married to my friend, whom I've known since we were 5 years old and she showed me where the bus stop was for kindergarten. She's devastated, he's been told he can't practice medicine anymore, so now he's out of work. Treatment can cost as much as half a million dollars, how do you pay for that? I feel so bad for her.



I'm so, so sorry for all of you.


----------



## CastingPearls

TraciJo67 said:


> My mother is really struggling. She has been diagnosed with early-onset dementia, probable Alzheimer's, and it's clear that she's slipping. She is unable to create new memories, although she is still oriented to time and place, and is still able to care for herself. But we're seeing signs that she's deteriorating in that area too. Her nuerologist told her today that she has to stop driving, and that he's submitting a recommendation to that effect to the DMV. It is very necessary, but she doesn't understand the scope of her cognitive losses and she's angry and frustrated and mostly very anxious and afraid of the loss of her independence. I wish that she didn't have to go through this, that we didn't have to watch her suffer and lose pieces of herself. I am also sad and frustrated and angry. I just don't know who or what to be angry with.
> 
> On second thought: Mossy? Can I use you as a punching bag?


So sorry Traci. (((hugs)))


----------



## CastingPearls

succubus_dxb said:


> my dad is in hospital in Qatar, all on his own. We're all a day's flying away. They think he has Dengue fever, and are running the tests now. I'm scared for him, and hope he cooperates with the doctors- agreeing with medical professionals is not something my family is good at :/


Hope your dad heals quickly. Sending warm peaceful thoughts.


----------



## CastingPearls

PamelaLois said:


> Just found out last night that my oldest friend's husband was diagnosed with Glioblastoma Multiforme on Saturday. He was sitting in his office in hospital trying to read patient charts (he's a doc) and realized that he couldn't read, didn't understand the words, and then he had a horrible headache. He went downstairs to the ER and said he thought he was having a stroke. The did a bunch of tests and the CT scan showed a tumor the size of a lemon in his brain. Glioblastoma is the cancer that killed Ted Kennedy. It's incurable, almost untreatable. A diagnosis is a death sentence. At best, with all the best care, he may have 1 1/2 years. Likely much less. He's young, in his mid 40s, just recently married to my friend, whom I've known since we were 5 years old and she showed me where the bus stop was for kindergarten. She's devastated, he's been told he can't practice medicine anymore, so now he's out of work. Treatment can cost as much as half a million dollars, how do you pay for that? I feel so bad for her.


So sorry. PL..............


----------



## MissHoney

This thread makes me feel better about my insignificant problems. It's a shame what we take for granted in life.


----------



## SuperGuyver

BigBawdyDame said:


> I'm sad and distrubed that I can't seem to get over a man I've been dating for only two months. We got along incredibly, physically and mentally. But we wanted different things emotionally. I ended it this past Wednesday, but I feel like I'm drowning. I know I'm mourning, but I absolutely hate feeling like this. I wish I could either not think about him or think of him and not feel soul wrenching pain. My friends have all told me they never liked him. Not helping! lol I feel alone and so very, very sad. It doesn't help that he's already back on the web site which we met through looking for my replacement. Do men really move on that quickly?



Normal guys do-me never.18 years old and never even been kissed(loved the movie)I feel hopeless and defeated-I don`t have any real friends ether except this girl I like-never met;we just talk on myspace and she wants to be just friends.But she would advance me as such.She spends the night with her real friends...it`s like all I am and will ever be is a online friend...but I want to be more.


----------



## DeerVictory

My sister went through something traumatic a few weeks ago that she hasn't told my parents about. My brother was in a car accident last night. He's okay, thank god, but it's still sad to think of what could have happened. 

I want to hug them, but I'm so far away.


----------



## Bearsy

I watched Stand By Me for the first time last night and I was really depressed for a while after it ended. Specifically because of the last lines of the movie



> I never had any friends later on like the ones I had when I was twelve. Jesus, does anyone?



It hit me really hard because I literally didnt have any friends at that age. I really didnt make my first legitimate friend until my freshman year of high school.

I had friends from church and school, but they werent ever people Id see outside of those establishments. Ive never had a sleepover, or a tree fort, or went fishing with some buddies. I never made those connections that children need to make. 

I was always just wrapped up in my books; and when I did want to have someone over my parents would prevent it from happening, one way or another. It kind of just hit me how shitty and empty my childhood really was.

But I guess I shouldnt harp on it. The past is the past and I just need to look forward to the future and appreciate the good friends that I have now.

Make the most of the time I have.


----------



## HottiMegan

I can't place my finger on it, i'm just sad. I think it's the depression doing a low thing. hubby's on call and at the hospital. i'm tired and just want to be in bed but i have two boys to feed and get ready for bed. I am just down today.


----------



## PamelaLois

PamelaLois said:


> Just found out last night that my oldest friend's husband was diagnosed with Glioblastoma Multiforme on Saturday. He was sitting in his office in hospital trying to read patient charts (he's a doc) and realized that he couldn't read, didn't understand the words, and then he had a horrible headache. He went downstairs to the ER and said he thought he was having a stroke. The did a bunch of tests and the CT scan showed a tumor the size of a lemon in his brain. Glioblastoma is the cancer that killed Ted Kennedy. It's incurable, almost untreatable. A diagnosis is a death sentence. At best, with all the best care, he may have 1 1/2 years. Likely much less. He's young, in his mid 40s, just recently married to my friend, whom I've known since we were 5 years old and she showed me where the bus stop was for kindergarten. She's devastated, he's been told he can't practice medicine anymore, so now he's out of work. Treatment can cost as much as half a million dollars, how do you pay for that? I feel so bad for her.



So, an update on my friend........

It just gets worse. She found out on 10/1 about the possibility that her husband had the glioblastoma, and they went to Texas to see doctors at MD Anderson on 10/6. They returned home on 10/7 to news that her mother had passed away that day. Her mom was 85 and had Alzheimers, so it wasn't an unexpected thing, but that week? Jebus, just pile on. On 10/13, her husband went into surgery to have the tumor biopsied and removed, but they found that it was stage 4 glioblastoma multiform and inoperable. His outlook is grim, at best, maybe a year, but probably less, much less. It's so hard that I can't go to Florida to help her or be with her. I feel so helpless, another autumn crapheap. It'll be a year since my father passed next month. I'm not a religious person, but I am seriously considering it


----------



## Mishty

The one and only one night stand I ever had was with my best guy friend. 
He's young, overly attractive, and hung. 
I feel a little shame about what happened, but he feels none, he tries to act like nothing happened, like we didn't cross that line. 
Anyway, this morning he found me on Facebook(how I'll never know) and added me, and within two seconds had a photo of us as his profile picture, it's a very sexy picture, we're all over each other in a very tasteful fashion.





I laughed and sent him a message asking what was he thinking he would scare away all the ladies....

and he said "Bay you are the only lady i care bout u know this" 

So fuck. I asked him to stop being dumb,
He says "u were the one being dumb not talkin to me for months and months"

yeah 'cause he had sex with the fat girl I was doing him a favor.... 

So now. I'm sad. Really sad. 
Because even though how much I love myself, and my body, I still don't think anyone else can.

It's so weird, here he is, every hunky inch of himself acting hurt 'cause I rejected HIM. I give up. :doh:


----------



## Surlysomething

PamelaLois said:


> So, an update on my friend........
> 
> It just gets worse. She found out on 10/1 about the possibility that her husband had the glioblastoma, and they went to Texas to see doctors at MD Anderson on 10/6. They returned home on 10/7 to news that her mother had passed away that day. Her mom was 85 and had Alzheimers, so it wasn't an unexpected thing, but that week? Jebus, just pile on. On 10/13, her husband went into surgery to have the tumor biopsied and removed, but they found that it was stage 4 glioblastoma multiform and inoperable. His outlook is grim, at best, maybe a year, but probably less, much less. It's so hard that I can't go to Florida to help her or be with her. I feel so helpless, another autumn crapheap. It'll be a year since my father passed next month. I'm not a religious person, but I am seriously considering it


 

How heartbreaking. I'm terribly sorry about your friend.


----------



## natepogue

Mishty said:


> The one and only one night stand I ever had was with my best guy friend.
> He's young, overly attractive, and hung.
> I feel a little shame about what happened, but he feels none, he tries to act like nothing happened, like we didn't cross that line.
> Anyway, this morning he found me on Facebook(how I'll never know) and added me, and within two seconds had a photo of us as his profile picture, it's a very sexy picture, we're all over each other in a very tasteful fashion.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I laughed and sent him a message asking what was he thinking he would scare away all the ladies....
> 
> and he said "Bay you are the only lady i care bout u know this"
> 
> So fuck. I asked him to stop being dumb,
> He says "u were the one being dumb not talkin to me for months and months"
> 
> yeah 'cause he had sex with the fat girl I was doing him a favor....
> 
> So now. I'm sad. Really sad.
> Because even though how much I love myself, and my body, I still don't think anyone else can.
> 
> It's so weird, here he is, every hunky inch of himself acting hurt 'cause I rejected HIM. I give up. :doh:


He totally likes you. Why'd you reject him?


----------



## Mishty

natepogue said:


> He totally likes you. Why'd you reject him?



'Cause of doubt. Lots and lots of doubt. 

:huh:


----------



## Lovelyone

THinking about an ex-friend. who I miss. Just makes me sad that he couldn't repsect me as a person and that ruined our friendship.


----------



## littlefairywren

Tomorrow will be my wee niece's birthday. I have not seen her for about 5 years now, and I am missing out on watching her grow up. I can't remember what she looks like anymore, because I have no photos of her sweet self.

I have also lost something I love.


----------



## spiritangel

littlefairywren said:


> Tomorrow will be my wee niece's birthday. I have not seen her for about 5 years now, and I am missing out on watching her grow up. I can't remember what she looks like anymore, because I have no photos of her sweet self.
> 
> I have also lost something I love.



lfw my heart breaks for you, I live in the same town with my sister and nieces and rarely get time with them at all, I cannot imagine not seeing them for birthdays and the like

or not having any pics 

Mishty Smack and wake up sweetie dont let this one get away, and stop letting fear stand in the way of what could be amazing!! Cause your awesome and totally deserve happiness the worse that can happen is your not in each others lives (wich you have already been through)


----------



## natepogue

Mishty said:


> 'Cause of doubt. Lots and lots of doubt.
> 
> :huh:



You only have one life, and sounds like you have a decently nice guy chasing after you (to whatever extent)

Why waste time keeping him at bay?


----------



## FreekiTiki

Mishty said:


> 'Cause of doubt. Lots and lots of doubt.
> 
> :huh:



That guy genuinely wants to be with you. I think you should give him the chance. Give yourself the chance to see that you are just as worthy of someone's love as anyone else on this planet is. 
The singles thread is full of people looking for the right mate who will love them as they are, sounds like you might have found a possible contender there. Give it another chance.


----------



## chocolate desire

My youngets daughter grandma passed yesterday and we was suppose to go visit her today.
Also an ex said we would work on things yet he closed lines of comunication.


----------



## rellis10

I am feeling completely mentally and emotionally drained. Yesterday (hell even early today) i was so unbelievably happy but...i dont know....things change. i'm sure i'll be happy again soon


----------



## willowmoon

rellis10 said:


> I am feeling completely mentally and emotionally drained. Yesterday (hell even early today) i was so unbelievably happy but...i dont know....things change. i'm sure i'll be happy again soon



Hope things turn around for you rellis -- you're one of the good guys, IMHO.


----------



## GTAFA

Toronto's election is making me sad. I watched the concession speech from George Smitherman, an openly gay candidate who finished second to Rob Ford, a very conservative candidate. I have to face the fact that my city is in the midst of a voter revolt, screaming about high taxes, etc, and eager for the simplistic solutions of Ford.


----------



## Kenster102.5

GTAFA said:


> Toronto's election is making me sad. I watched the concession speech from George Smitherman, an openly gay candidate who finished second to Rob Ford, a very conservative candidate. I have to face the fact that my city is in the midst of a voter revolt, screaming about high taxes, etc, and eager for the simplistic solutions of Ford.



Yeah do I ever wish we had Calgary's Naheed Nenshi, he is well spoken, very smart and very humble.

I voted for Smitherman and Dhanni.

Too bad he is going to "Huff and puff and blow Toronto to the ground"


----------



## Lil BigginZ

i finally thought i found the girl of my dreams. the past 6 years have been the best years of my life minus the last 2 months. thats when my wife started cheating on me. i moved in with my sister a few states away. but its still sucks knowing my marriage failed.


----------



## Mishty

I'm crushing so hardcore right now, and most of the times my crushes are out of my league for my safety, I can dream from a distance, learn what makes them human and flawed and I'm over it. Not this time. I'm so dumb for doing this to myself....


----------



## GTAFA

Kenster102.5 said:


> Yeah do I ever wish we had Calgary's Naheed Nenshi, he is well spoken, very smart and very humble.
> 
> I voted for Smitherman and Dhanni.
> 
> Too bad he is going to "Huff and puff and blow Toronto to the ground"



Indeed, my Calgary friends are laughing it up. I'm trying to see the bright side. 

the winner was declared eight minutes after the polls closed. No silly suspenseful election evening with heart-break at the end. I was able to shut it off right away and change the channel
my instincts were right (i wasted so much time trying to persuade friends supporting Pantalone to vote Smitherman... they had the nerve to say Ford & Smitherman are the same).
But life goes on.


----------



## Surlysomething

Lil BigginZ said:


> i finally thought i found the girl of my dreams. the past 6 years have been the best years of my life minus the last 2 months. thats when my wife started cheating on me. i moved in with my sister a few states away. but its still sucks knowing my marriage failed.


 

So sorry to hear this.

-hug-


----------



## CastingPearls

At what point do you have to be gone for a person to actually miss you or even notice you're not there anymore?


----------



## AmazingAmy

I just bit off some of my freshly-grown nails, setting myself back a month. I just couldn't help myself, I didn't even notice I was doing it until I glanced at them! I'm sick of this habit...


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

AmazingAmy said:


> I just bit off some of my freshly-grown nails, setting myself back a month. I just couldn't help myself, I didn't even notice I was doing it until I glanced at them! I'm sick of this habit...



I've heard that for some, having fake nails helps curb that problem.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

Humanity, or.. rather, the lack of humanity 'humans' have today. 

Why can't people get along? Huh? :really sad:


----------



## CastingPearls

AmazingAmy said:


> I just bit off some of my freshly-grown nails, setting myself back a month. I just couldn't help myself, I didn't even notice I was doing it until I glanced at them! I'm sick of this habit...


I get regular manicures for this very reason. I consider them rewards for not chewing my cuticles off. It's cheaper than therapy.


----------



## Mathias

People are assholes...


----------



## AmazingAmy

CastingPearls said:


> I get regular manicures for this very reason. I consider them rewards for not chewing my cuticles off. It's cheaper than therapy.


I was growing my nails specifically to be able to have a manicure and get them professionally painted for Big Girls Paradise in December... I wrecked it for myself. I thought I was past having to wear that nasty tasting polish, but I suppose it's back to it.  I'll have to check out the nails thread more as a reminder of my goal!



Mathias said:


> People are assholes...


*Hugs for Matt*


----------



## succubus_dxb

when i was at work tonight (bar/bottle shop) I was sat behind my colleague having a break and a slice of mango, and this crazy woman comes in the bottle shop, shouts at me 'don't look at me like that', then says to my colleague 'bitch be obese and european'....erm...

I might be happy with my body, but someone saying 'bitch be obese' is painful. I don't understand people intentionally being hurtful, especially when i haven't even f*cking looked at them.

It saddens me that I have let it hurt me.


----------



## AmazingAmy

succubus_dxb said:


> when i was at work tonight (bar/bottle shop) I was sat behind my colleague having a break and a slice of mango, and this crazy woman comes in the bottle shop, shouts at me 'don't look at me like that', then says to my colleague 'bitch be obese and european'....erm...
> 
> I might be happy with my body, but someone saying 'bitch be obese' is painful. I don't understand people intentionally being hurtful, especially when i haven't even f*cking looked at them.
> 
> It saddens me that I have let it hurt me.



It never ceases to astound me that someone people, like that woman, continue to think it's acceptable to openly hate fat people. It's like the universal mantra of tolerance for diversity is null and void when it comes to peoples' body shape. It's fucking absurd.

Hugs for you Succubus, and sorry you had to experience this.


----------



## Bafta1

I just feel sad today--really, really alone.


----------



## MisticalMisty

AmazingAmy said:


> I just bit off some of my freshly-grown nails, setting myself back a month. I just couldn't help myself, I didn't even notice I was doing it until I glanced at them! I'm sick of this habit...





MizzSnakeBite said:


> I've heard that for some, having fake nails helps curb that problem.



I feel your pain. Unfortunately, I wore fake nails for 2 years. A week after they were off, my nails were gone. I hadn't even noticed I had bitten them off until my mom mentioned it.

She's been trying for years to cure me. Hell, I was probably chewing them in utero! lol

Good luck Amy!


----------



## mossystate

Should probably be in the happy thread...but I proved to my roomie that, yes, I am able to chew my toenails ( OK, just the big toes and kinda the second toes ) if I needed to.

:bow:


----------



## Donna

mossystate said:


> Should probably be in the happy thread...but I proved to my roomie that, yes, I am able to chew my toenails ( OK, just the big toes and kinda the second toes ) if I needed to.
> 
> :bow:



The roomie be damned...prove it to the rest of us. Pictures or it didn't happen!


----------



## MisticalMisty

The rangers are losing.


----------



## mossystate

Donna said:


> The roomie be damned...prove it to the rest of us. Pictures or it didn't happen!



I will get right on that...after I get out of my comfy pants with the holes ....there.


----------



## Rojodi

I passed a stone on Tuesday, my wife and my 25th anniversary. I could NOT tell her that I did, since we were in Atlantic City, 300 miles from home. Now, as I sit in a Starbucks to get out of the house, it hurts like paper cuts..annoyingly painful only when....

I call the doctor Monday, I've heard it from the women in my life since we came home Thursday.

(We left with $500 to spend on slots, returned with $675 and change)


----------



## rellis10

At the end of the week i might not have a job anymore, due to the actions of three IDIOTS who were supposed to be running a charity but instead decided to bloody ruin it!

I extremely rarely get angry at anything, but this situation makes me want to punch something.....hard.


----------



## Saoirse

hes leaving soon.


----------



## CAMellie

I went to visit my best friend of 15 years, Mala, and it was all I could do to keep from crying hysterically. She has stage 4 non small-cell lung cancer. She got up to use the restroom...and she was so thin she looked like a skeleton covered in skin. This was the first time I've seen her in months because her chemo has kept her isolated.
I don't know what I'm going to do when she's gone.


----------



## thirtiesgirl

I'd be fine with working as hard as I work, putting up with spoiled students, teachers and parents who think they can demand what they want from me right now, having parents and students call me a bitch behind my back, having teachers with their own personal agenda/axe to grind treat me and my students like crap, having administration not do anything about it... if only I had someone to come home to. I haven't worked this hard to get myself where I am in my career and my educational level and have nothing else to show for it. I can't even afford my own place yet. I can't even afford a new car (well, used, but new to me). I feel like I worked so damn hard to climb that mountain, but I'm still scrabbling around at the bottom. I'm a self-made woman, but I feel like I'm missing so many parts. And if I keep giving the way I've been giving, I'm not going to have anything left over for myself.


----------



## RJ20

Still looking for employment aswell as a girl  Still trying to get my liscense and want to get a place of my own.


----------



## nettie

CAMellie said:


> I went to visit my best friend of 15 years, Mala, and it was all I could do to keep from crying hysterically. She has stage 4 non small-cell lung cancer. She got up to use the restroom...and she was so thin she looked like a skeleton covered in skin. This was the first time I've seen her in months because her chemo has kept her isolated.
> I don't know what I'm going to do when she's gone.



Just (((( hugs )))). The love from our friends feeds our souls. I'm keeping you both in my thoughts and prayers.


----------



## tx_artsygirl

just missing someone that i have been missing for far too long.


----------



## Mishty

The biggest pile of family bullshit! I'm all crying and sniffling. 

When I was 19 years old I decided to remain in contact with my uncle Trent's ex wife, he lied about some stuff, I called him out on it(because of the children) and now to this day, 9 years later he holds a grudge because I took "her side". 

Just now, he got an attitude on a comment I added on our cousins facebook. I mean. Jesus he's in his mid-forties. Grow the hell up already. So being a smart ass, I just friend requested him, but deep down I want him to forgive me and be apart of my life, I don't want to fight someone my Mama loves so much. It's her youngest brother and because of me he ignores her to. Breaks her heart, but she never brings it up because her loyalty is to me. 

I know he wont, but I wish he would build a bridge....god I pray he might.


EDIT: 
I guess I got my answer.....  

View attachment dds.jpg


----------



## CastingPearls

Recently I got a FB friend request from someone from high school and the name really didn't register but I accepted anyway.

So she's commenting on a lot of my posts, very nice, very pleasant and very chummy as if we're old friends so I go to her profile where there are no pics of her. I come across a pic of her daughter, a lovely girl with a very familiar face and I read the tagged name and it all clicks.

She was my best friend in my senior year who while I was laid up with bronchitis, tonsilitis and laryngitis, started to secretly see my boyfriend. I found out by accident in the rest room one afternoon when I was sitting in a stall and I heard people come in and voices and it was my best friend talking about the new love of her life which up to that point, I thought was the love of MY life. 

I came out of the stall and faced her and I knew my face was white and hers was too and she looked at me and said, Lainey I'm so sorry..if you want you can hit me and I just walked stiffly past her. 

They ended up getting married. 

Ten years later I was on my way to a long weekend getaway and made a quick stop at a liquor store and a man approached me and said, Lainey do you remember me? It's Frank. I'm fairly oblivious when I'm walking in public so I kind of stood there in shock while he explained to me that he and Tara were divorced and had a little girl and would I like to see her pic. I said of course. She was sweet. 

He then went on to explain that he had often driven past my house hoping I would be outside and regretted what he had done and had always been in love with me and Tara knew it. I didn't understand why he was telling me this because I didn't break up with him..he chose to be with her..and I know I wasn't distant or standoffish...I stood there completely bewildered while he tried to make a case for me to reconsider him and because I was on my way to see another man, I was irritated and impatient and disgusted as to why he even had to tell me this. Did I look like Mother Confessor?

So I remembered this, gazing at this now teenage girl, who've I've only seen two photos of, bearing the perfect combination of the features of a man I once loved, and a friend I once cherished and I was compelled to ask my old friend whatever happened to them because her profile indicated they were divorced. She sent me a long email basically explaining that he had just died although they'd been divorced a long time. She also apologized profusely for what she had done, what they had done and even inferred that their marriage never had a chance because of the guilt they both had. 

It just made me incredibly sad, on an even more incredibly sad week. I wish I hadn't even known. I could have gone through my whole life without hearing that or one more man saying, I was the one who got away when it was never me who actually did.


----------



## rellis10

Still sat at home waiting for this call about my job. Seriously, how long does it take to make a bloody decision when the jobs of 15 people are at risk? 

EDIT: Just called up my company to see if they had any news, and it's still a "No, wait untill we call you"


----------



## AsianXL

rellis10 said:


> Still sat at home waiting for this call about my job. Seriously, how long does it take to make a bloody decision when the jobs of 15 people are at risk?


Hey, sorry to hear that, I hope you receive some good news.


----------



## willowmoon

rellis10 said:


> Still sat at home waiting for this call about my job. Seriously, how long does it take to make a bloody decision when the jobs of 15 people are at risk?
> 
> EDIT: Just called up my company to see if they had any news, and it's still a "No, wait untill we call you"



Nice for them to pile on the stress, huh? Bastards.


----------



## Linda

rellis10 said:


> Still sat at home waiting for this call about my job. Seriously, how long does it take to make a bloody decision when the jobs of 15 people are at risk?
> 
> EDIT: Just called up my company to see if they had any news, and it's still a "No, wait untill we call you"



UGH! That is frustrating! I am sorry.


----------



## Rowan

I got a call from the doctor's office today. They got the results of my ultrasound on my throat and they see 7 nodules on and around my thyroid and suspect they are cancerous, so, I now need to go to an endochronologist and have a biopsy/biopsies done on my throat to either confirm that I have cancer or to disprove it.

I admit, I cried a little today when I heard this.


----------



## littlefairywren

Rowan said:


> I got a call from the doctor's office today. They got the results of my ultrasound on my throat and they see 7 nodules on and around my thyroid and suspect they are cancerous, so, I now need to go to an endochronologist and have a biopsy/biopsies done on my throat to either confirm that I have cancer or to disprove it.
> 
> I admit, I cried a little today when I heard this.



Sending you positive thoughts, love and hugs, Rowan.


----------



## AuntHen

Rowan said:


> I got a call from the doctor's office today. They got the results of my ultrasound on my throat and they see 7 nodules on and around my thyroid and suspect they are cancerous, so, I now need to go to an endochronologist and have a biopsy/biopsies done on my throat to either confirm that I have cancer or to disprove it.
> 
> I admit, I cried a little today when I heard this.



I send you good thoughts and will keep you in my prayers dear girl!!


----------



## Rowan

littlefairywren said:


> Sending you positive thoughts, love and hugs, Rowan.





fat9276 said:


> I send you good thoughts and will keep you in my prayers dear girl!!



Thanks guys...I really appreciate it. 

Its funny...I always thought that if I was ever told I have cancer (dont know yet, mind you) that I'd handle it fine and just kind of be like....ok, whatever, but when I was told that today, I didnt take it very well...I was really saddened


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

Rowan said:


> I got a call from the doctor's office today. They got the results of my ultrasound on my throat and they see 7 nodules on and around my thyroid and suspect they are cancerous, so, I now need to go to an endochronologist and have a biopsy/biopsies done on my throat to either confirm that I have cancer or to disprove it.
> 
> I admit, I cried a little today when I heard this.



I'm so sorry to hear this. This might be at least part of the reason why you're so tired. If you're to get cancer, thyroid cancer's the one to get, since it's so treatable. So, once your thyroid's removed, you should be ok. 

((hugs))


----------



## Dmitra

I've had to cancel my trip to San Francisco and move to New Jersey.  Massively bummed but there's a helpful bit of relief mixed in.


----------



## CastingPearls

Rowan said:


> I got a call from the doctor's office today. They got the results of my ultrasound on my throat and they see 7 nodules on and around my thyroid and suspect they are cancerous, so, I now need to go to an endochronologist and have a biopsy/biopsies done on my throat to either confirm that I have cancer or to disprove it.
> 
> I admit, I cried a little today when I heard this.


Sending positive vibes, hugs, and a prayer that all goes well.


----------



## peoplelike

I'm a little sad now.


----------



## AuntHen

That someone I care *very *much for, lost someone dear to them


----------



## Rowan

peoplelike said:


> I'm a little sad now.





fat9276 said:


> That someone I care *very *much for, lost someone dear to them



Im sorry to hear that  I hope both of you feel better!


----------



## Donna

Today would have been my older brother's birthday, but we lost him to heart failure in January 2007. I learned a lot from my Billy...he introduced me to books, old Sci-Fi flicks and hard rock music.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

fat9276 said:


> That someone I care *very *much for, lost someone dear to them





Donna said:


> Today would have been my older brother's birthday, but we lost him to heart failure in January 2007. I learned a lot from my Billy...he introduced me to books, old Sci-Fi flicks and hard rock music.



Sorry for your losses.

((hugs))


----------



## HDANGEL15

*My ex-sister-in law has been sober for the last 4 yrs and is drunk again..and her 16 yr old son (my nephew) caught her and is very upset.

I am sad...He didn't really have a mom from 4-12...and I am powerless*


----------



## CAMellie

One of my grandmothers passed away today after having a massive stroke.


----------



## MizzSnakeBite

HDANGEL15 said:


> *My ex-sister-in law has been sober for the last 4 yrs and is drunk again..and her 16 yr old son (my nephew) caught her and is very upset.
> 
> I am sad...He didn't really have a mom from 4-12...and I am powerless*





CAMellie said:


> One of my grandmothers passed away today after having a massive stroke.



I'm so sorry.


----------



## Scorsese86

My grandfather has four sisters, and the bad thing is that the one he is closest to, was diagnosed with cancer a few months back. Today, I learned the cancer had been spreading from the lungs all the way to the brain. I don't know her very well, but I know she is my grandfather's "favorite" sister, and that just makes me very sad, giving how close the two of we are...


----------



## Rowan

CAMellie said:


> One of my grandmothers passed away today after having a massive stroke.





Im sorry to hear that hon *hugs*


----------



## Lil BigginZ

i wish i could just stop thinking about this person.  



CAMellie said:


> One of my grandmothers passed away today after having a massive stroke.



i'm sorry for your loss


----------



## Micara

My brother had to put his bulldog Porter to sleep today. Porter was like his kid. I feel so bad for him and wish there was something I could do.


----------



## Mishty

life .....................


----------



## CAMellie

Thank you, everyone, for the sympathy on the loss of my grandma. I appreciate it.


----------



## cherylharrell

So sorry to hear about your grandma. Prayers and hugs...


----------



## CAMellie

My niece Trish, who is expecting a little girl March 31st, was told yesterday that she has placenta previa...and her OB/GYN is VERY worried about her making it to full-term.


----------



## GTAFA

Pat Burns passed away.

http://www.thestar.com/news/article/894172--dimanno-pat-burns-a-man-s-man-with-a-tender-heart?bn=1


----------



## activistfatgirl

I think I might be in denial a bit. I was just at my refrigerator and looked at a photo of my mom and remembered, oh right, she died two weeks ago. I usually called her on Saturdays. 2010 has been the shittiest year ever.

BUT (am I the only one who has to pair the -/+ I'm really believing that this period of turmoil is going to end soon enough!


----------



## mossystate

activistfatgirl said:


> I think I might be in denial a bit. I was just at my refrigerator and looked at a photo of my mom and remembered, oh right, she died two weeks ago. I usually called her on Saturdays. 2010 has been the shittiest year ever.
> 
> BUT (am I the only one who has to pair the -/+ I'm really believing that this period of turmoil is going to end soon enough!



AFG, I still catch myself thinking, " oh, I should tell Mom about that, she would like it ", and she has been gone 3 years. Your loss is so recent, but if you believe the rawest of emotions will soon subside, then they probably will. You will then be better able to handle the smaller waves...but they will always come, and for me, they remind me I am alive, and also that she very much existed. The -/+ gets us through most things. Try not to stuff things and let them out from remote mountaintops, or into welcoming ears and hearts. You take good care.


----------



## nettie

mossystate said:


> AFG, I still catch myself thinking, " oh, I should tell Mom about that, she would like it ", and she has been gone 3 years. Your loss is so recent, but if you believe the rawest of emotions will soon subside, then they probably will. You will then be better able to handle the smaller waves...but they will always come, and for me, they remind me I am alive, and also that she very much existed. The -/+ gets us through most things. Try not to stuff things and let them out from remote mountaintops, or into welcoming ears and hearts. You take good care.




AFG, my heart goes out to you.

And mossy, you are so right. It's been 30 years since I lost my own mother (I was 19 at the time) and there are still times I think "I wish I could talk to my mom about this." I had her long enough to learn how to be a strong, confident woman and how to love unconditionally. Those traits and my many memories keep her in my life, and help me get through the times I really miss her.

Love to both you girls.


----------



## cinnamitch

mossystate said:


> AFG, I still catch myself thinking, " oh, I should tell Mom about that, she would like it ", and she has been gone 3 years. Your loss is so recent, but if you believe the rawest of emotions will soon subside, then they probably will. You will then be better able to handle the smaller waves...but they will always come, and for me, they remind me I am alive, and also that she very much existed. The -/+ gets us through most things. Try not to stuff things and let them out from remote mountaintops, or into welcoming ears and hearts. You take good care.



I agree, It gets bearable, but the emotions never totally go away.


----------



## mimosa

*I am sad, and God knows why. I pray about it a little through out the whole day. 

It seems that no romantic partner is in the cards for me at this time. I also have other personal issues to work out. It bums me out. 

But I hope to have at least have my good health back. That's more important. I just want to take care of myself. I am learning how.*


----------



## AuntHen

mimosa said:


> *I am sad, and God knows why. I pray about it a little through out the whole day.
> 
> It seems that no romantic partner is in the cards for me at this time. I also have other personal issues to work out. It bums me out.
> 
> But I hope to have at least have my good health back. That's more important. I just want to take care of myself. I am learning how.*



You are in my prayers dear lady! One day/step at a time... 


(((((((((((((((HUG)))))))))))))))))))))))


----------



## mimosa

Bless your heart. Thank you very much! Hugs back darling. :kiss2:




fat9276 said:


> You are in my prayers dear lady! One day/step at a time...
> 
> 
> (((((((((((((((HUG)))))))))))))))))))))))


----------



## littlefairywren

Silence


----------



## Duchess of York

My husband lost his job due to lack of delivery items


----------



## Luv2BNaughty

littlefairywren said:


> Silence



Awwww ((huggles)) 

I'm sad for a few friends of mine who are going through heartache. I can only offer them so much advice and hope that something I say will console them


----------



## AuntHen

littlefairywren said:


> Silence



(((((((((HUG)))))))))


----------



## CleverBomb

littlefairywren said:


> Silence


"Fools, said I, you do not know,
Sllence like a casserole..."

-Rusty
(I do hope the silence abates.)


----------



## SuperMishe

Right now I'm sad because it's proving harder than I thought to get people interested in a scrapbooking event I am planning :-(


----------



## CAMellie

I'm going to be all alone on Thanksgiving. Adrian has to work and my mother isn't cooking this year.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Can you go over to her house and either do the cooking or bring pre-prepared food? Just a thought.


----------



## littlefairywren

Luv2BNaughty said:


> Awwww ((huggles))
> 
> I'm sad for a few friends of mine who are going through heartache. I can only offer them so much advice and hope that something I say will console them





fat9276 said:


> (((((((((HUG)))))))))





CleverBomb said:


> "Fools, said I, you do not know,
> Sllence like a casserole..."
> 
> -Rusty
> (I do hope the silence abates.)



Oh, thanks for that guys. It's all good, and I'm a happy woman :happy:


----------



## goatboy

littlefairywren said:


> Silence



I hope that the noise I sent you helped with the silence.


----------



## Linda

Just been an overall crappy day.

Please let tomorrow be better...


----------



## CleverBomb

Linda said:


> Just been an overall crappy day.
> 
> Please let tomorrow be better...


It will be. At least, if my hoping it will be has anything to do with it, it will!

Me, I'm disappointed that the Blizzard of DOOM!! we were supposed to get tonight was insufficiently doomy. Might be more snow tonight, but as far as actual on-the-ground accumulation, it hasn't been all that bad. Visibility during rush hour was pretty bad though, I understand -- but missed it. 

And yeah, if all I have to be disappointed in at the moment is inadequate snowfall, I suppose I don't have it all that bad right now. 

-Rusty


----------



## littlefairywren

Linda said:


> Just been an overall crappy day.
> 
> Please let tomorrow be better...



Hugs for you, sweet stalkee! Fingers crossed for a better day


----------



## MzDeeZyre

Linda said:


> Just been an overall crappy day.
> 
> Please let tomorrow be better...



I'm sorry that you're having a rough go of things. Just remember that we love you and that this too shall pass. You are absolutely one of the best friends that I have ever had, and I hate when you are sad. 

Cheer Up Buttercup!!
:wubu:


----------



## Duchess of York

This is the first Thanksgiving since my Mom passed away from Breast Cancer. It's really going to be difficult celebrating tomorrow without her in body, but, in spirit, I know she will be here!

It was really hard not being able to call her to ask "hey, ma... how do I" when making some of the stuff for the meal and hearing her voice and laughter.


----------



## Saoirse

Lots of things unfortunately. My mood was incredible this morning, but it has since gone downhill.

One thing that is getting to me- A friend of mine changed his FB profile pic to a picture of Gustav Courbet for some reason.






well... a guy I went to school with, Josh... his profile pic is that same pic, because he looked exactly like that...

Josh died a few years ago at the age of 22. I still dont know the details, but I heard it was either an accident involving a gun... or suicide. The fact that suicide has been mentioned is the part that gets me.

Josh had some issues. He was kinda weird, wore the same clothes and talked about strange things. He was completely harmless, just an oddball. A lot of people didnt give him the time of day, but we were always in the same homeroom in HS, and we always had lockers near each other. I wouldnt say we were friends, but we had our usual morning banter. He was a cool kid, once you got passed the initial awkwardness, but I know a lot of kids didnt even bother trying.

I still laugh thinking about his plan to take over the world. He always promised to give me Canada. :happy:

oh well. Im just emotional today.


----------



## ladle

The nation is in mourning...


----------



## CAMellie

BigBeautifulMe said:


> Can you go over to her house and either do the cooking or bring pre-prepared food? Just a thought.



I wish I could, love, but her bf and I hate each others guts and it would turn into a big old mess. I wish I could get my mom over to my house, but she has agoraphobia.  Oh well. Adrian and I will just have a late Thanksgiving dinner.


----------



## Inhibited

ladle said:


> The nation is in mourning...



We are in mourning with our cousin..


----------



## Rowan

*sigh* just so bloody sad of being so soul achingly lonely so often lately


----------



## Mohulis

Rowan said:


> *sigh* just so bloody sad of being so soul achingly lonely so often lately



*hugZ* From the new guy.


----------



## Tanuki

My best friend is going home after staying with me 3 weeks, Sad ; _ ;!


----------



## veggieforever

Rowan said:


> *sigh* just so bloody sad of being so soul achingly lonely so often lately


 
Sending you MASSIVE, squidgey hugs!! Been where you are sweetie and it's no fun. It's nice to get a cuddle from a stranger and be told that this is just a temporary glitch and know they mean it and are more than likely to be absolutely correct! Everything must come to pass...  xXx


----------



## Surlysomething

Rowan said:


> *sigh* just so bloody sad of being so soul achingly lonely so often lately


 

Have you thought of getting into some counseling? This time of year is particularly hard, maybe talking to someone would help.


----------



## CAMellie

I called my mother to wish her a Happy Thanksgiving and she let slip that she IS making a big dinner. She told me she wasn't because her bf told her he didn't want me in the house...even though he isn't even there today.
So I get to sit here, alone and lonely, because my mom would rather lie to me than stick up for me.


----------



## Duchess of York

((((((((((((((((((( big, smooshy hugs, Mellie )))))))))))))))))))


----------



## Rowan

CAMellie said:


> I called my mother to wish her a Happy Thanksgiving and she let slip that she IS making a big dinner. She told me she wasn't because her bf told her he didn't want me in the house...even though he isn't even there today.
> So I get to sit here, alone and lonely, because my mom would rather lie to me than stick up for me.



God Cam..I hate that your mom feels she can treat you like that. I wish i was there. I'd love on you and make sure you knew that darlin,..YOU are important
DO NOT ever forget that ok?

*huge hugs*

Rowan


----------



## Rowan

veggieforever said:


> Sending you MASSIVE, squidgey hugs!! Been where you are sweetie and it's no fun. It's nice to get a cuddle from a stranger and be told that this is just a temporary glitch and know they mean it and are more than likely to be absolutely correct! Everything must come to pass...  xXx



ty hon...ive just been so overwhelmed by so much, so fast that i dont know how to deal with much of it...guess that is the hardest part


----------



## CastingPearls

CAMellie said:


> I called my mother to wish her a Happy Thanksgiving and she let slip that she IS making a big dinner. She told me she wasn't because her bf told her he didn't want me in the house...even though he isn't even there today.
> So I get to sit here, alone and lonely, because my mom would rather lie to me than stick up for me.


Oh Mellie! ((((((hugs))))))


----------



## spiritangel

CAMellie said:


> I called my mother to wish her a Happy Thanksgiving and she let slip that she IS making a big dinner. She told me she wasn't because her bf told her he didn't want me in the house...even though he isn't even there today.
> So I get to sit here, alone and lonely, because my mom would rather lie to me than stick up for me.



oh CaMellie that totally sux, my yahoo and msn are on my profile if you want some online company (wish I could offer more but yeah the whole in australia thing makes that hard)

that is really hurtful, especially if the person who doesnt want you there isnt even around I mean seriously.

Lots and lots and lots of big squishy hugs


----------



## Noir

Whenever a relationship ends you always have that empty feeling in your chest. Definitely hate that feeling.


----------



## CAMellie

I just want to thank everyone for their hugs and support. I ended up sleeping the day away until Adrian came home. Then we just nuked some food and he held me while I cried.
My mother hasn't bothered to contact me since she slipped up...and I sure as heck am not gonna call her!


----------



## mel

realizing I am not truly loved as I had hoped I was


----------



## Saoirse

I havent seen him in a week!


----------



## Fuzzy

Garfield.. without Garfield

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mR2nM4-ki5A


----------



## Inhibited

I just got my license and i think i'm about to lose it. Realised the flashes were not lightening but red light/speed cameras :-(


----------



## littlefairywren

Inhibited said:


> I just got my license and i think i'm about to lose it. Realised the flashes were not lightening but red light/speed cameras :-(



OMG! Say it isn't so?


----------



## Luv2BNaughty

Fuzzy said:


> Garfield.. without Garfield
> 
> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mR2nM4-ki5A



Wow. Garfield was always one of my favorite comic strips and this totally puts a new perspective that I never really noticed... =/


----------



## Your Plump Princess

My addiction to food is worse than I thought, and stopping is harder. [Exceptionally harder, when added emotionalness is tossed into the mix. ]


----------



## Inhibited

littlefairywren said:


> OMG! Say it isn't so?



Am praying am wrong. Its not from being stupid am still getting used to the roads and speed changes so frequently.


----------



## littlefairywren

Inhibited said:


> Am praying am wrong. Its not from being stupid am still getting used to the roads and speed changes so frequently.



Fingers and toes crossed for you, honey.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

Gah. New Sadness.. 

:really sad: I can hear a mouse caught in the mouse trap, and it's like, in it's death throws [I think]
because it's making a lot of banging noises with the trap. :really sad:


----------



## mossystate

Your Plump Princess said:


> Gah. New Sadness..
> 
> :really sad: I can hear a mouse caught in the mouse trap, and it's like, in it's death throws [I think]
> because it's making a lot of banging noises with the trap. :really sad:




http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias=garden&field-keywords=live+mouse+trap


----------



## AuntHen

CAMellie said:


> I called my mother to wish her a Happy Thanksgiving and she let slip that she IS making a big dinner. She told me she wasn't because her bf told her he didn't want me in the house...even though he isn't even there today.
> So I get to sit here, alone and lonely, because my mom would rather lie to me than stick up for me.




Yeah, I can relate. Only after Thanksgiving I thought I was supposed to spend the day with my little sister and niece. I texted her in the morning to see what was going on... no answer... texted her again later in the afternoon... no answer... texted her AGAIN to tell her "just say yes or no" and got this...

"I am in a movie right now"


----------



## Rowan

So after a week, no more PTO time at work, and still no voice, I was pretty much forced to resign today. I have been crying for hours because I dont know what IM going to do to be able to pay my rent ($500 a month) or car payment ($390) a month. Im applying for Unemployment, and praying so hard I get it, but i dont know if they'd give it to me since it was a resignation...even though it was forced. My work also told me if fired i can never go back to work for them and a resignation looks much better than a firing. I am so sick and tired and hate my life. 

I know people say that life is a God given gift...well he gave me a broken one, so Id like to have it fixed or returned please. *sigh*


----------



## willowmoon

Rowan said:


> So after a week, no more PTO time at work, and still no voice, I was pretty much forced to resign today. I have been crying for hours because I dont know what IM going to do to be able to pay my rent ($500 a month) or car payment ($390) a month. Im applying for Unemployment, and praying so hard I get it, but i dont know if they'd give it to me since it was a resignation...even though it was forced. My work also told me if fired i can never go back to work for them and a resignation looks much better than a firing. I am so sick and tired and hate my life.
> 
> I know people say that life is a God given gift...well he gave me a broken one, so Id like to have it fixed or returned please. *sigh*



I know it's kind of after the fact & all, but would you have qualified for FMLA due to medical reasons?


----------



## Mishty

You can't always get what you want. :really sad:


----------



## graphicsgal

I am sad that I have to rely on others for help...my income just doesn't provide enough for the boys and I. It seems like every road is a dead end and sometimes it is very very hard for me to keep going.


----------



## Rowan

willowmoon said:


> I know it's kind of after the fact & all, but would you have qualified for FMLA due to medical reasons?



Had to have been there a year to qualify for it


----------



## Twilley

the fear that I'm wrecking this relationship, too v__v


----------



## Your Plump Princess

_He_ never says the right things, or at least, the things I'd wish he'd say..


----------



## mimosa

*I just found out my godmother passed away from breast cancer.  There was no funeral. She did not want one. 


What sucks worse is that no one told me. They were trying to protect me in someway. That is not the answer! 


*


----------



## CastingPearls

To everybody hurting right now (((((((((((hugs)))))))))))


----------



## ButlerGirl09

The fact that I got attacked while waiting on the train platform today. Some people are just really pathetic. It makes me upset that he came after me because he thought I'd be an easy target--Proved him wrong.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

((((((((((((((Madison))))))))))))) what happened, girl? Are you okay?!


----------



## ButlerGirl09

BigBeautifulMe said:


> ((((((((((((((Madison))))))))))))) what happened, girl? Are you okay?!



I'm relatively fine--A few broken nails and a tweaked ankle. He got a few hits at my stomach but I was wearing a puffy winter jacket that softened the blows. So hopefully there won't be any bruises.

I saw the train approaching and I left the warming station. I had seen the guy looking at me and a split second before it happened I knew exactly what he was going to do. I had just taken my phone out of my pocket and he attempted to knock it out of my hand it take it. He also grabbed ahold of my wrist and the strap on my bag. We were literally entangled. 

You can take my stuff that's fine. But when you violate and go after my personal space and body then I'm going to get pissed. So I fought back. Kicked his shins, hit his chest, and eventually pushed him onto the ground. 

Just saddens me what some people would stoop to... Thank you for your concern, Ginny. It really is appreciated!


----------



## Kenster102.5

Did you press charges? Did you get your stuff back?


----------



## ButlerGirl09

Kenster102.5 said:


> Did you press charges? Did you get your stuff back?



After he got up from the ground he ran off and he didn't actually get any of my things despite his best efforts.


----------



## Linda

ButlerGirl09 said:


> After he got up from the ground he ran off and he didn't actually get any of my things despite his best efforts.



(((((( Hugs )))))) Glad you're ok.


----------



## littlefairywren

ButlerGirl09 said:


> I'm relatively fine--A few broken nails and a tweaked ankle. He got a few hits at my stomach but I was wearing a puffy winter jacket that softened the blows. So hopefully there won't be any bruises.
> 
> I saw the train approaching and I left the warming station. I had seen the guy looking at me and a split second before it happened I knew exactly what he was going to do. I had just taken my phone out of my pocket and he attempted to knock it out of my hand it take it. He also grabbed ahold of my wrist and the strap on my bag. We were literally entangled.
> 
> You can take my stuff that's fine. But when you violate and go after my personal space and body then I'm going to get pissed. So I fought back. Kicked his shins, hit his chest, and eventually pushed him onto the ground.
> 
> Just saddens me what some people would stoop to... Thank you for your concern, Ginny. It really is appreciated!



OMG, I am so glad you're ok, ButlerGirl09. Good on you for fighting back ((((HUGS))))


----------



## Lovelyone

I am so sorry that you had to go through this, but I am so happy to know that you weren't seriously injured. That bastard has some nasty Karma coming his way and I hope he gets it by way of a thunderbolt up his ass. 




ButlerGirl09 said:


> I'm relatively fine--A few broken nails and a tweaked ankle. He got a few hits at my stomach but I was wearing a puffy winter jacket that softened the blows. So hopefully there won't be any bruises.
> 
> I saw the train approaching and I left the warming station. I had seen the guy looking at me and a split second before it happened I knew exactly what he was going to do. I had just taken my phone out of my pocket and he attempted to knock it out of my hand it take it. He also grabbed ahold of my wrist and the strap on my bag. We were literally entangled.
> 
> You can take my stuff that's fine. But when you violate and go after my personal space and body then I'm going to get pissed. So I fought back. Kicked his shins, hit his chest, and eventually pushed him onto the ground.
> 
> Just saddens me what some people would stoop to... Thank you for your concern, Ginny. It really is appreciated!


----------



## Lovelyone

My mother passed away 6 months ago, yesterday. Today would have been her 70th birthday. I thought I was handling the grief pretty well until I remembered that today was her birthday.


----------



## VickiNicole

what is making me sad is that I am extremely lonely and feel unlovable
I wish I could find a man to love me forever, and lay in his arms night after night for eternity.
I have never had that feeling


----------



## Micara

Just heard today that my former job is laying off upwards of 100 people- the entire pressroom and mailroom- and right before Christmas. I feel really bad for them, as I knew a lot of them and they were awesome, stand-up guys.

At the same time, I am really thankful that I was laid off back in July and am already in a wonderful, more secure, and higher-paying job. I hope that they are able to find the same!


----------



## Aliena

I wanted to send out some positve vibes for all of you that are sad. I read through the last few pages of this thread and my heart just went out to all of you. Please know that love can be found, doors close while other ones open, and advesities can strengthen our character. Big hugs...


----------



## Mishty

This plan to halt college till I'm 30 may come back to haunt me. 
MY desire for higher education has just...left. I have no desire to continue, I want to do _something_ I enjoy, and when I'm done I want to do _something else_. One career path isn't going to work for me, and I'm more upset that my parents are going to be upset with my lack of motivation than with any fears of withdrawing and leaving school. 
If I wanted it, I'd have it. 

I just want to dream, live and be. No more plans.

I'm more confused than sad, but it's a major emotion right now.


----------



## willowmoon

Micara said:


> Just heard today that my former job is laying off upwards of 100 people- the entire pressroom and mailroom- and right before Christmas. I feel really bad for them, as I knew a lot of them and they were awesome, stand-up guys.
> 
> At the same time, I am really thankful that I was laid off back in July and am already in a wonderful, more secure, and higher-paying job. I hope that they are able to find the same!



Ugh, that's awful timing that an employer would do that when Christmas is right around the corner. Hope things turn out ok for them, especially with this lousy economy.


----------



## Aust99

My grandmother passed away today...


----------



## willowmoon

Aust99 said:


> My grandmother passed away today...



So sorry to hear this, Nat. Sending you virtual hugs from afar ....


----------



## Tanuki

Tied to talk to my Mum again about trans stuff... so hard, doesn't work, needs more time, I am so selfish...


----------



## littlefairywren

Such a very small thing, but it has started to rain


----------



## Inhibited

littlefairywren said:


> Such a very small thing, but it has started to rain



I thought you liked the rain?


----------



## littlefairywren

Inhibited said:


> I thought you liked the rain?



I love the rain, just not right now.


----------



## graphicsgal

Micara said:


> Just heard today that my former job is laying off upwards of 100 people- the entire pressroom and mailroom- and right before Christmas. I feel really bad for them, as I knew a lot of them and they were awesome, stand-up guys.
> 
> At the same time, I am really thankful that I was laid off back in July and am already in a wonderful, more secure, and higher-paying job. I hope that they are able to find the same!



Is your paper closing? I live with this fear every day. I think our only saving grace is that we are so rural...we are the only paper that covers 9 counties.


----------



## Mathias

I lost my iPod today. I just got back from retracing my steps and I'm on the verge of crying... :really sad:


----------



## Lovelyone

It's sad being single on the holidays with no one to share the spirit with.


----------



## Surlysomething

Mathias said:


> I lost my iPod today. I just got back from retracing my steps and I'm on the verge of crying... :really sad:


 

Keep the hope alive. I thought I lost mine and 3 weeks later I found it.


----------



## Luv2BNaughty

That March can't get here fast enough!


----------



## The Fez

The first ten minutes of Up

I will forever cry at this movie


----------



## snuggletiger

Feeling blaze` and somewhat depressed. NOt sure how to shake those feelings away


----------



## supersoup

The Fez said:


> The first ten minutes of Up
> 
> I will forever cry at this movie



The first time I saw that movie, those first ten minutes DESTROYED me. I was sniffly and snotty and teary. Now when I watch it, I still tear up, but it's like a bittersweet type thing. Love love love that movie.


----------



## The Fez

Yeah it's probably my favourite movie of the past couple years

But my god

When she falls walking up the hill


----------



## Donna

Thank God I am not the only one who cried watching 'Up'. 

Me: *sniff*
Hubby: "what's wrong?"
Me: "nothing" *sniff, sniff*
Hubby: "Are you crying?"
Me: *sniff* "Um, no." *sniff*
Hubby: "Dammit you are crying! Why are you crying at a cartoon?"
Me: "'Cause I can't help it, it's sooo sad!" *full on wail*
Hubby: "You must be hormonal." 

I think the shoe I threw at him missed his head by about half an inch.


----------



## Luv2BNaughty

Glad to know there are more 'hormonals' out there than just myself. (((hugs y'all)))


----------



## Your Plump Princess

* oh my god, I took my brother to see "Up" in theaters, and I wound up silently sobbing through the beginning, too. * 


..Right now? 
I'm sad because my most beloved local television show "Ned the Dead" is going off-air after this saturdays episode, and they are going to turn their show [which is actually them in costume ripping on classic "B" movies.] online. Which means.. Me (Ms. I don't have a sound card) won't be able to watch them anymore. :really sad: They made my Saturday nights alone so awesome for so long.


----------



## Aliena

That I can't put one foot in front of the other and walk my arse out the door. I live w/fear and paranoia; such a coward!


----------



## CAMellie

Mala, my best friend of 15 years, has been battling non small cell lung cancer for 3 years now. They stopped her chemo today, said that there was nothing else they could do for her (she tried a number of clinical trials...they all failed), and gave her less than 2 months to live.
I'm beyond sad right now...I'm devastated


----------



## HottiMegan

All the crying at Up reminds me of the time we took my brother in law to see Toy Story at teh $1 theater. He has Cerebral Palsy and can't control his volume to well when he gets emotional. So we're watching the movie and at some point it get emotional and he just starts sobbing and it sounds like a moose or something. He just apologizes and says "damn Disney movies". He cries at a lot of disney movies. It's sweet.

I too get a little choked up with that bit on Up. It's a bittersweet part of the movie. I too got teary at Toy Story 3. It made me realize my kids are growing up too fast.


----------



## Luv2BNaughty

HottiMegan said:


> All the crying at Up reminds me of the time we took my brother in law to see Toy Story at teh $1 theater. He has Cerebral Palsy and can't control his volume to well when he gets emotional. So we're watching the movie and at some point it get emotional and he just starts sobbing and it sounds like a moose or something. He just apologizes and says "damn Disney movies". He cries at a lot of disney movies. It's sweet.
> 
> I too get a little choked up with that bit on Up. It's a bittersweet part of the movie. I too got teary at Toy Story 3. It made me realize my kids are growing up too fast.



I cried in TS3 too, in a couple of the scenes. What can I say? I'm just a big softie.


----------



## Aliena

CAMellie said:


> Mala, my best friend of 15 years, has been battling non small cell lung cancer for 3 years now. They stopped her chemo today, said that there was nothing else they could do for her (she tried a number of clinical trials...they all failed), and gave her less than 2 months to live.
> I'm beyond sad right now...I'm devastated



Camellie, I am truly sorry to read this. I wish that there was something I could say to help you feel better, but there isn't. I'm sending prayers and positive thoughts you and your friends way. ((((((((hugs))))))))))


----------



## Mishty

HottiMegan said:


> I too get a little choked up with that bit on Up. It's a bittersweet part of the movie. I too got teary at Toy Story 3. It made me realize my kids are growing up too fast.





Luv2BNaughty said:


> I cried in TS3 too, in a couple of the scenes. What can I say? I'm just a big softie.



At the end, when Andy plays with all of them one last time with the little girl....man. I was a sob box. To be honest though I've cried on all the Toy Story movies. :blush:

The weirdest thing was though, Harry Potter(7.1) made me cry.... a lot.


----------



## mimosa

A few weeks ago, I lost a man that I thought was the closest thing I had to a soul mate. I am still grieving the loss of that relationship.

Not being with my son on Christmas for the first time is very sad for me.


----------



## Admiral_Snackbar

Mathias said:


> I lost my iPod today. I just got back from retracing my steps and I'm on the verge of crying... :really sad:



There's an app for that.  Hopefully you'll find it.


----------



## CAMellie

Aliena said:


> Camellie, I am truly sorry to read this. I wish that there was something I could say to help you feel better, but there isn't. I'm sending prayers and positive thoughts you and your friends way. ((((((((hugs))))))))))



Aliena,

Your prayers and positive thoughts mean a lot to me. Thank you so much.


----------



## Mathias

Admiral_Snackbar said:


> There's an app for that.  Hopefully you'll find it.



It's not looking too good. But all of my music is backed up and if worse comes to worse, I'm going to get a new one that's cheaper.


----------



## trucrimsongold

What is making me sad? I am lonely.


----------



## The Fez

Everything. FML


----------



## CastingPearls

trucrimsongold said:


> What is making me sad? I am lonely.


(((((hugs))))))


----------



## Your Plump Princess

The forced inability to sleep.


----------



## Tanuki

Due to health problems I cant get out much and im feeling really down about it, in the words of Freddy Mercury "I want to break freeee"!


----------



## Rowan

Still sick..still out of work...not sure what im going to do about rent....*sigh* just so tired of my life sometimes.


----------



## AuntHen

My neighbor's 18 year old daughter took her own life a week ago and they just found her yesterday! Heart wrenching!!


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

fat9276 said:


> My neighbor's 18 year old daughter took her own life a week ago and they just found her yesterday! Heart wrenching!!



Oh, that is AWFUL. I'm so sorry. My prayers and heart are going out to that family.


----------



## Linda

fat9276 said:


> My neighbor's 18 year old daughter took her own life a week ago and they just found her yesterday! Heart wrenching!!



(((((hugz))))) Prayers coming your way.


----------



## Adamantoise

I hope that you all can find something to help weather the storms you all face during the festive season-sometimes it's the hardest of the seasons to get through,especially if you live alone,so I send you all my warmest of seasons greetings,and a happy new year. :happy:


----------



## Rowan

Adamantoise said:


> I hope that you all can find something to help weather the storms you all face during the festive season-sometimes it's the hardest of the seasons to get through,especially if you live alone,so I send you all my warmest of seasons greetings,and a happy new year. :happy:



Thanks for the warm thoughts...they are very much appreciated


----------



## Gingembre

Tomorrow I have to ask my dad if he wants me to lend him money so he can get my mum a Christmas present....I'm not sure how to broach it and we're not that close so it's going to be horribly awkward for us both. I hate that he's got things in such a state financially that I have to ask, and I know he feels the same.

Also I found out yesterday (even though i've been on leave y'day and today) that the company i work for is laying off 19 people....that's 1/3 of the company. Think they've finally realised that they've expanded too quickly. Pretty sure my job is safe which is good (especially considering the above paragraph), but i feel bad because I think i'll be kept on even though i _hate_ my job/the company and there are others there that really like it. *sigh* The office atmosphere wasn't particularly cheery before...i'm sure it's ruddy awful now.


----------



## Micara

Two things- one of my best friend's sister-in-law, who is maybe 30 at the most, collapsed while at dinner on Saturday. She had a brain aneurysm and two strokes. They don't know if she will pull out of it and told her family to prepare for the worst. She has 2 daughters, ages 3 and 5. 

Also, the mayor of the town I live in killed himself this morning. There's a lot of speculation about gambling debts, unpaid taxes, and missing money from an estate he was executor of. But nevertheless, he was a nice guy. Really friendly. I feel terrible for his family, but find it even sadder that while one person is fighting for her life, another one is taking his.


----------



## Aliena

That my mother didn't make a special birthday dinner tonight. She told the birthday boy she wouldn't be there---because of me!


----------



## OneWickedAngel

A colleague who had to go out of town to a funeral was giving me his tickets to see Prince tonight, no charge. Yay!






He forgot to leave them for me before he left town. Boo!:doh:

So he mailed them to my job USPS. Yay! :happy:

In his rush he forgot to put the agency name and floor number in the address. So I never got it. Boo! :doh:

Finally got hold of him via email last night and got the USPS tracking number. It claims it went back to the local post office on Monday. Yay!:happy:

I get to the post office this morning. My building has over twenty agencies inside, there was absolutely no way to track me down. With it marked undeliverable the USPS policy is to return to sender. Boo!

So they sent the tickets back to him and they would probably arrive today, except he and his family are where? The funeral is today (probably going on as I type this), thus by the time he even sees my email explaining it all, it will be too late to do anything. Absolutely no way to see to Purple One tonight, and I was so looking forward to it tonight. :really sad:WAAAAAAAAAH!:sad:


----------



## Surlysomething

OneWickedAngel said:


> A colleague who had to go out of town to a funeral was giving me his tickets to see Prince tonight, no charge. Yay!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> He forgot to leave them for me before he left town. Boo!:doh:
> 
> So he mailed them to my job USPS. Yay! :happy:
> 
> In his rush he forgot to put the agency name and floor number in the address. So I never got it. Boo! :doh:
> 
> Finally got hold of him via email last night and got the USPS tracking number. It claims it went back to the local post office on Monday. Yay!:happy:
> 
> I get to the post office this morning. My building has over twenty agencies inside, there was absolutely no way to track me down. With it marked undeliverable the USPS policy is to return to sender. Boo!
> 
> So they sent the tickets back to him and they would probably arrive today, except he and his family are where? The funeral is today (probably going on as I type this), thus by the time he even sees my email explaining it all, it will be too late to do anything. Absolutely no way to see to Purple One tonight, and I was so looking forward to it tonight. :really sad:WAAAAAAAAAH!:sad:


 
Damn! I'd be pissed if I was sooo close to seeing his *Purple Greatness* only to have it foiled by such a clusterF.


----------



## cherylharrell

I am going crazy here, My dear hubby passed on in March of 2009. I couldn't afford to stay in our home being a homemaker so I had to rent out my home and move in with my folks. When hubby was alive we would go and do as we pleased. 

Well I got a thing in the mail from Lane Bryant saying that one of their stores which was an hr from me was going out of business and having a going out of business sale. I called to see how much off the stuff was and when they were closing. They are closing Dec 24 and stuff is 60% off. You'd be crazy not to go to a sale like that and see what they've got. I mentioned to my mom and she said she didn't want me going that far this time of yr. I tried to explain and she had a fit sqauwking about not wanting me to me to go and about how I had too many clothes and I didn't need anymore. She doesn't know what I need or don't need, only I do. Now that Mikes gone I can't even have a life anymore. I'm probably headed for a nervous breakdown if this keeps up. And my dad sides with my mom. Just lay off me I'm hurting over Mike. And I'm made out to be the bad guy. All because I want to have a life. It just beeping sucks. I am grateful tho my folks took me in and I love them dearly. I just wish they would see my side of things. I wish Lane Bryant had never sent me that dumb flyer.

Felt so good to get this off my chest...

After reading what ya'll have wrote my problems now seem trivial...


----------



## mossystate

Cheryl, your sadness is not trivial. You are mourning the loss of a life you once had, and when reminders are shoved in our faces...it's only natural to feel it. Your parents are not making the connection, and that this is not really about the clothing...but I wanted to make sure you know you were ' heard '. I understand.


----------



## Gingembre

Gingembre said:


> I found out yesterday (even though i've been on leave y'day and today) that the company i work for is laying off 19 people....that's 1/3 of the company. Think they've finally realised that they've expanded too quickly. Pretty sure my job is safe....



It wasn't safe...I'm losing my job and I'm definitely not moving to the USA anymore. FML


----------



## Tad

Gingembre said:


> It wasn't safe...I'm losing my job so I'm definitely not moving to the USA anymore. FML



(((YOU))) So sorry to hear that....and what an awful time of year to lay people off (I guess there is no good time, but couldn't they at least wait until the new year?)

As sharp as you seem, I'm sure you'll bounce back nicely, but sure a pile of stress during that bouncing part. Best wishes on getting through it with your nevers (and bank account) reasonably intact.


----------



## Bigtigmom

Gingembre said:


> It wasn't safe...I'm losing my job and I'm definitely not moving to the USA anymore. FML


 
I'm sorry to hear your bad news. I hope things look up for you soon.


----------



## Inhibited

Gingembre said:


> It wasn't safe...I'm losing my job and I'm definitely not moving to the USA anymore. FML



Am so sorry i live in fear of this most days, it leaves and than that feeling of insecurity comes back.... I wish you all the best in finding a new job, hope it works out for the best..


----------



## Paw Paw

I was out of town (again), and a friend of mine passed away.

He had a heart attack in his sleep. God rest and keep Jeff Williams. You will always be "Bodiene" to me.

Peace,
2P.


----------



## cherylharrell

Thanks so much for the support. I think a medicine that my mom takes is what is making her grumpy like that. Wish she could stop taking it but she can't. I had seen a bracelt set in Lane Bryant I wanted but is not on sale. If I could get to that going out of business sale I could ptrobably get it cheap if it is left. Sigh. I went to going out of business sales with my hubby and now he's gone I can't go anymore. Sucks...

Prayers just said for all and those who were sick. We care...


----------



## Shosh

Aliena said:


> That I can't put one foot in front of the other and walk my arse out the door. I live w/fear and paranoia; such a coward!



You are not a coward sweets.
Phobias can take a long time to overcome, and you need to be gentle with yourself as you take steps to heal.
xo


----------



## HeavyDuty24

Shosh said:


> You are not a coward sweets.
> Phobias can take a long time to overcome, and you need to be gentle with yourself as you take steps to heal.
> xo




i know this is random but i love your new avatar Shosh,you are extremely beautiful from the heart....you have a gorgeous face it is so good to see it.:wubu:


----------



## blueeyedevie

I am sad my life is not working out the way it fore told in the story book version.


----------



## KingColt

The whole Wiki Leaks affair. It´s so transparent yet there´s nothing you can do. Makes me realize once more how fucked up the world is. The whole thing is pathetic.


----------



## littlefairywren

I miss seeing Momma Bird here


----------



## mel

...fighting...I just want to laugh and cuddle


----------



## JonesT

Tanuki Kimberly said:


> Due to health problems I cant get out much and im feeling really down about it, in the words of Freddy Mercury "I want to break freeee"!



So sorry to hear that


----------



## CarlaSixx

... guys messaging me pretending to be into big women... when it's just that the girls they actually like are unavailable


----------



## JonesT

CarlaSixx said:


> ... guys messaging me pretending to be into big women... when it's just that the girls they actually like are unavailable



I know exactly how that is. I was once in love (well thought I was) with a girl that only came to me when the guys she wanted was unavailable. Made me feel like shit


----------



## CarlaSixx

JonesT said:


> I know exactly how that is. I was once in love (well thought I was) with a girl that only came to me when the guys she wanted was unavailable. Made me feel like shit



Story of a fat girl's life, lol. 

What's worse is that now as an adult, they just want sex. Oye. :doh: Makes it even worse when they're looking to build a relationship with a "model-esque" type and yet just want someone like me on the side for sex.

Not happening, and makes me lose that much more faith in humanity.


----------



## JonesT

CarlaSixx said:


> Story of a fat girl's life, lol.
> 
> What's worse is that now as an adult, they just want sex. Oye. :doh: Makes it even worse when they're looking to build a relationship with a "model-esque" type and yet just want someone like me on the side for sex.
> 
> Not happening, and makes me lose that much more faith in humanity.



That's exactly how it is. I actually have a few friends that does that type of stuff. It bothers me because I know exactly how that girl must feel. Some women try to call me when they want "pleasure" as they call it but I won't do it because me, with my big heart and small brain, will fall for them. 

It sucks but that's how most of humanity is today.


----------



## spiritangel

I just hurt someone unintentionally


----------



## vinarian

yellow...


----------



## HeavyDuty24

that my tape soundtrack i ordered is not in my hands right now and i can't listen to it.:really sad::sad:


----------



## chapelhillmensch

This Thread


----------



## Mathias

I'm miserable at my college. I've grown increasingly lonely and isolated over the years and I'm working up the nerve to tell my parents how unhappy I am. I haven't slept or eaten since yesterday afternoon. The school I'm looking at is so much better than where I am currently. I'm a wreck over this. :really sad:


----------



## Buttah

that i feel so inadequate and i dont know when i'll ever see my full self-worth


----------



## willowmoon

I found out late last night while reading Tuesday's newspaper that an ex-girlfriend's mother passed away on Sunday. It's really sad and certainly very unexpected -- her mom was only 49. The last time I saw her mom was around two years ago while shopping and we chatted quite a bit. I'll be attending the funeral today to offer my condolences. And the ex-girlfriend and I parted on good terms so I'm hoping it won't be an issue for me to show up. I just still can't believe her mom passed away -- I knew she had some medical issues in the past but I'm still quite shocked by it all.


----------



## spiritangel

littlefairywren said:


> I miss seeing Momma Bird here



omg I have been so wrapped up in so much where is she???? I havent seen her post on fb in a while either hope she is ok


----------



## JerseyGirl07093

Mathias said:


> I'm miserable at my college. I've grown increasingly lonely and isolated over the years and I'm working up the nerve to tell my parents how unhappy I am. I haven't slept or eaten since yesterday afternoon. The school I'm looking at is so much better than where I am currently. I'm a wreck over this. :really sad:



Just talk to your parents and tell them how you feel. I'm sure they only want what's best for you and wouldn't want you to be miserable at school. Education is so important and you won't be able to achieve your goals if you're so unhappy. Good luck!


----------



## littlefairywren

spiritangel said:


> omg I have been so wrapped up in so much where is she???? I havent seen her post on fb in a while either hope she is ok



I am hoping she is ok too


----------



## disconnectedsmile

i got a feeling called the blu-uu-ues, oh lord, since my baby said goodbye
lord, i don't know what i'll do-oo-oo-oo, all i do is sit and si-ii-igh


----------



## SSBBW Katerina

That every time I think the fates are showing me mercy, and I manage to take a step forward, g0d says, "Ha!. Psych!!", and I'm taken back 20 steps.

Please let 2011 be more successful.


----------



## penguin

My plans for new years have changed. BOO. Just pushed back a day...but still. I wanted to celebrate NYE.


----------



## Scorsese86

Auntie died this morning.

She isn't really my aunt, she's my mom's favorite aunt, and my grandpa's favorite sister. May she rest in peace.


----------



## Famouslastwords

I'm sad because I can't rep anybody for 24 hours. This...sucks.


----------



## mossystate

But you can still take pictures of your...well, you know.


----------



## Famouslastwords

mossystate said:


> But you can still take pictures of your...well, you know.



My pussy.....in a pink hat?


----------



## Famouslastwords

Oh you mean my poop.


----------



## Aust99

How completely drunk I got and how hung over I am today... I swear... never again!!!


----------



## Famouslastwords

Aust99 said:


> How completely drunk I got and how hung over I am today... I swear... never again!!!



Girl, I just started drinking an hour ago. Are....you......ME.....from......the....future?


----------



## Aust99

Famouslastwords said:


> Girl, I just started drinking an hour ago. Are....you......ME.....from......the....future?


Yes... beware the vodka....


----------



## CastingPearls

Laumbrusco, Champagne and Grey Goose, Oh My.

(I feel like I was run over by a tractor trailer that backed up and rolled over me again and again and again)


----------



## penguin

My back. I haven't had problems with it for a while, but last night it seized up on me (after the sex, at least), and while it eventually got better last night, it's just started up again now. Ugh. There goes any plans I had for the day :/


----------



## Chode McBlob

On Dec 21st my apartment building went up in flames while I was away at my parents in FL. So now I live in a motel. At on point I thought I might have lost everything but I didn't. However I think I made out better than the other tennants. My apartment did not get touched by the fire. Just smoke and water. But it is uninhabitable as there is no power and the door is bashed in and its boarded up. ServPro has all my stuff and it will be cleaned up and I am looking for another apartment in another community. I have had a very shitty holiday!


----------



## Famouslastwords

Aust99 said:


> Yes... beware the vodka....




You are me from the future! That's exactly what I was drinking!

Except I was making home made lemon drops. OMG delicioso.

P.S. Can you tell me the lottery number?


----------



## Luv2BNaughty

After spending a little over 7 hours in the ER today, having an ultrasound and a CT Scan, this painful lump in my abdomen is a hernia  At least I finally know what it is but now I've got to figure out how and when to have surgery done. *sigh*


----------



## Famouslastwords

I'm sad that after webcaming with my "friend" several times he complained about my short hair. I don't particularly like this style myself but I don't expect my friends to complain about my hair either.


----------



## Gingembre

Famouslastwords said:


> I'm sad that after webcaming with my "friend" several times he complained about my short hair. I don't particularly like this style myself but I don't expect my friends to complain about my hair either.



If it's still the same hairstyle as in the nekkid pictures where you've got your pussy out (her cat, guys, jeeez, calm down)...I think it's hawt. Really super cute. 

If it's different, well, i'm sure it's still lush.


----------



## Admiral_Snackbar

Luv2BNaughty said:


> After spending a little over 7 hours in the ER today, having an ultrasound and a CT Scan, this painful lump in my abdomen is a hernia  At least I finally know what it is but now I've got to figure out how and when to have surgery done. *sigh*



Depending on the size of the hernia, most are repaired laparoscopically these days, so you have a minimum of down time.


----------



## Luv2BNaughty

Admiral_Snackbar said:


> Depending on the size of the hernia, most are repaired laparoscopically these days, so you have a minimum of down time.



The curvature I feel from the outside makes me think it's about the size of an orange? I have an appointment 1/31 with a place that charges by your income..and will refer me to one of two places..so hopefully I can get through this without a totally overwhelming bill since I don't have insurance.


----------



## Admiral_Snackbar

Luv2BNaughty said:


> The curvature I feel from the outside makes me think it's about the size of an orange? I have an appointment 1/31 with a place that charges by your income..and will refer me to one of two places..so hopefully I can get through this without a totally overwhelming bill since I don't have insurance.



Abdominal hernias are manageable depending on whether there is constriction (or 'strangulation' to use the medical parlance). I lived with an inguinal hernia for many years without realizing it, and figured the side effects of temporary constriction was simply indigestion. The big concern is if a part of the bowel gets strangulated, becomes hypoxic and dies, then you end up with either sepsis or a colostomy, which is never a good thing. If the hernia is the size of an orange (either an actual tear or a weakening of the peritoneum), it's probably not small enough to get strangulated. Either way I know they can be very painful.

I hope you find someone to fix it affordably.


----------



## Luv2BNaughty

Admiral_Snackbar said:


> Abdominal hernias are manageable depending on whether there is constriction (or 'strangulation' to use the medical parlance). I lived with an inguinal hernia for many years without realizing it, and figured the side effects of temporary constriction was simply indigestion. The big concern is if a part of the bowel gets strangulated, becomes hypoxic and dies, then you end up with either sepsis or a colostomy, which is never a good thing. If the hernia is the size of an orange (either an actual tear or a weakening of the peritoneum), it's probably not small enough to get strangulated. Either way I know they can be very painful.
> 
> I hope you find someone to fix it affordably.



The good news out of all of it is that it is non-obstructive.


----------



## AmazingAmy

That I had to basically yell at my boss today in order to get her to do the only thing I ever ask her to do, which is pay me. It was bad enough going through Christmas and New Year without any money because she decided to go on holiday without paying me, but it's getting beyond a joke now. I don't want to have to yell at people just to fill their end of a very basic bargain.


----------



## Aust99

Amy, In Australia we can call "wageline" to report or get advice if we are having trouble getting paid/ getting the right money.... If she can't get off her ass and follow the rules... report her. I'm sure the UK would have some similar help available.


----------



## AmazingAmy

Aust99 said:


> Amy, In Australia we can call "wageline" to report or get advice if we are having trouble getting paid/ getting the right money.... If she can't get off her ass and follow the rules... report her. I'm sure the UK would have some similar help available.



Thanks for this Nat. I'm gonna look into it because she paid me - as well as fired me - today, but she cut two hours off my wage for what I think is an unfair reason. It was snowing one of the Saturdays that I was working, and she rang me to say I could shut shop at 2:00 and leave. I told her I had a lot of work to do, so she told me to stay until it was done. The work took until the usual closing time. Now she's saying that she definitely told me to leave at 2:00 regardless of all the work I did for her in those two extra hours. The only reason I didn't argue with her more about it was because she also accused me of opening the shop late on some days because customers had complained to her it hadn't been open. That infuriates me because I have _ALWAYS _been on time, well before 9:00. Took a lot of arguing just to convince her some customers are full of shit and like to tell lies to try and get discounts.

I feel lost and angry/numb right now. I wish this had all been on my own terms.


----------



## rellis10

AmazingAmy said:


> That I had to basically yell at my boss today in order to get her to do the only thing I ever ask her to do, which is pay me. It was bad enough going through Christmas and New Year without any money because she decided to go on holiday without paying me, but it's getting beyond a joke now. I don't want to have to yell at people just to fill their end of a very basic bargain.



I'm sorry to hear this, Amy. I know what it's like for employers to mess around with paying wages. I hope everything gets sorted out for you soon, it's hell to live without money, especially over this time of year.

edit: Just read your second post. I'm so sorry that your employer is a complete bitch. You really deserve to be treated better than that. If that's how your being treated then I'd say you're better off not being there.

Believe me, I know it's tough finding another job but I'd rather do this than be completely messed around by an employer.


----------



## Scorsese86

AmazingAmy said:


> That I had to basically yell at my boss today in order to get her to do the only thing I ever ask her to do, which is pay me. It was bad enough going through Christmas and New Year without any money because she decided to go on holiday without paying me, but it's getting beyond a joke now. I don't want to have to yell at people just to fill their end of a very basic bargain.



I am so sorry to hear this, Amy Some people should never have such responsibility... and I know you deserve better. Some people are just rotten. Your boss is obviously one of them.
I wish you luck, and I offer a hug.


----------



## AmazingAmy

rellis10 said:


> I'm sorry to hear this, Amy. I know what it's like for employers to mess around with paying wages. I hope everything gets sorted out for you soon, it's hell to live without money, especially over this time of year.
> 
> edit: Just read your second post. I'm so sorry that your employer is a complete bitch. You really deserve to be treated better than that. If that's how your being treated then I'd say you're better off not being there.
> 
> Believe me, I know it's tough finding another job but I'd rather do this than be completely messed around by an employer.





Scorsese86 said:


> I am so sorry to hear this, Amy Some people should never have such responsibility... and I do think, in the long run, it's best for you to no longer work there. Some people are just rotten.
> I wish you luck, and I offer a hug.



Thank you, guys. I'm trying to remind myself that I was leaving anyway and that I shouldn't be as down as I feel; I must just be upset that she had the gall to nitpick my work habits when I have made excuses for her a thousand times. I wish I'd bought up how she hands back clothes to customers when they haven't even been cleaned. Like no one fucking knew... ugh, bitch.


----------



## Ample Pie

that I am sometimes forced to agree with crazy people because of crazIER people.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

My cousin is picking me up in a little bit so we can go out to lunch... for the last time, before she moves from Wisconsin to Kentucky. 

:really sad: The first time in years that a cousin actually liked me, wanted to hang out with me, and then she goes and spontaneously gets married and moves away. FML.


----------



## Mishty

The very small minds in this little town.

It's starting to get to me, with their snide remarks and horrible attitudes towards anything outside their boxes. 

:really sad:


----------



## fluffyandcute

Missing a special someone


----------



## blueeyedevie

Sad about always going to bed alone!


----------



## RJ20

I got a friend upset, when I did'nt mean to.  I did'nt mean to bother I was just trying to be friends but she never responds so I thought she was ignoring me or it was going un noticed. And I really want to meet her and maybe even make something happen and got bummed that she's seeing someone. It may not be "official" but your still seeing someone else. And then I had to go and post this on her thread when it's her personal private business. And I tried to get her to forgive me but even unfollowed me on Twitter. I just wanted to show her that I'm a nice guy and I wanted to chat and get her know her. NOT
Have her think I'm annoying or a jerk.  AND she dosen't even have time to chat cause she's with somebody and I haven't chatted with her in the longest time. Just 5 or 10 minutes every now and then that's all I ask. We started things off on the right foot but now..I don't know  She did'nt even get the gift I sent her through snail mail which I sent weeks ago. I don't know if it's that lady Heather or probably the mail service's fault most likely I don't know. I did'nt mean to send multiple messages either it's just I did'nt hear back and I wanted to hear some nice feedback. That's all. Now it's like she hates me and I feel awful about it. I just really want to go back to being friends and just making her happy


----------



## Aust99

When I took my families dog to the vet today to get her nails cut, she passed out and was unconscious in my arms for about 30 seconds... I was so scared... Thanks to a fast acting vet she was on oxygen and came too and seems to be ok but we are taking her back to the vet tomorrow to be checked again... I hope she is ok. My mother and father are away on holiday and they would be devastated if she passed away while they were gone. Vet thinks she has a heart murmur, she wont be alone for a few days... scary stuff... She is an old girl though... 16 years but don't want to lose her yet.


----------



## *Goofy*Girl*

I cheated on my diet...again.
So much for New Year's resolutions.


----------



## BoldPenny

The inability to travel, live and work as I please. I want to have the guts and financial stability to just up and move to Australia and hope for the best... and I think I'm going to do it next month, yippie!!!


----------



## sugar and spice

My heart feels like it is breaking. My brother ( 3 yrs older than me) has been fighting liver cancer for a year. He went to the hospital for an appointment to be checked and they ended up admitting him because his kidneys are failing. My Sister-in-law just called to tell me she was told his bloodwork came back with very bad numbers and that he " could go at any time ". Everyone knew this was coming but noone expected it to be now. We were hoping he could be at home with hospice when this day came, he hates the hospital and is always so unhappy there. 
As much as we fought as kids we have always been very close and he has always been my big brother who was there for me and vice a versa. I don't know what I will do without him. I am very worried for my parents too as I know how hard this will be on them and on my sister-in-law. I'm a mess.


----------



## CastingPearls

sugar and spice said:


> My heart feels like it is breaking. My brother ( 3 yrs older than me) has been fighting liver cancer for a year. He went to the hospital for an appointment to be checked and they ended up admitting him because his kidneys are failing. My Sister-in-law just called to tell me she was told his bloodwork came back with very bad numbers and that he " could go at any time ". Everyone knew this was coming but noone expected it to be now. We were hoping he could be at home with hospice when this day came, he hates the hospital and is always so unhappy there.
> As much as we fought as kids we have always been very close and he has always been my big brother who was there for me and vice a versa. I don't know what I will do without him. I am very worried for my parents too as I know how hard this will be on them and on my sister-in-law. I'm a mess.


I'm very sorry about your brother. Please take care of yourself. Hugs.


----------



## graphicsgal

My dad is dating a 31-year old woman and I am trying to be kind about it. Also, my man is acting odd. Time for some serious IMVU.


----------



## graphicsgal

sugar and spice said:


> My heart feels like it is breaking. My brother ( 3 yrs older than me) has been fighting liver cancer for a year. He went to the hospital for an appointment to be checked and they ended up admitting him because his kidneys are failing. My Sister-in-law just called to tell me she was told his bloodwork came back with very bad numbers and that he " could go at any time ". Everyone knew this was coming but noone expected it to be now. We were hoping he could be at home with hospice when this day came, he hates the hospital and is always so unhappy there.
> As much as we fought as kids we have always been very close and he has always been my big brother who was there for me and vice a versa. I don't know what I will do without him. I am very worried for my parents too as I know how hard this will be on them and on my sister-in-law. I'm a mess.



((hugs)) I am sorry you are going through this. Also, sending prayers.


----------



## Surlysomething

graphicsgal said:


> My dad is dating a 31-year old woman and I am trying to be kind about it. Also, my man is acting odd. Time for some serious IMVU.


 

My Dad married someone only 11 years older than me when I was a pre-teen. It was messed up.

I feel your pain.


----------



## Emma

How heartbroken my husband is after finding out his father had passed away. He was the best father in law I could have asked for and was only 62. I wish I could take Niks pain away.


----------



## Donna

sugar and spice said:


> My heart feels like it is breaking. My brother ( 3 yrs older than me) has been fighting liver cancer for a year. He went to the hospital for an appointment to be checked and they ended up admitting him because his kidneys are failing. My Sister-in-law just called to tell me she was told his bloodwork came back with very bad numbers and that he " could go at any time ". Everyone knew this was coming but noone expected it to be now. We were hoping he could be at home with hospice when this day came, he hates the hospital and is always so unhappy there.
> As much as we fought as kids we have always been very close and he has always been my big brother who was there for me and vice a versa. I don't know what I will do without him. I am very worried for my parents too as I know how hard this will be on them and on my sister-in-law. I'm a mess.



I'm so sorry.


----------



## Donna

CurvyEm said:


> How heartbroken my husband is after finding out his father had passed away. He was the best father in law I could have asked for and was only 62. I wish I could take Niks pain away.



Aww, I'm sorry. I know what you are feeling...when my FiL passed, it was difficult to be strong for my husband and support him while dealing with my own greif over the loss. Be strong, Em.


----------



## littlefairywren

sugar and spice said:


> My heart feels like it is breaking. My brother ( 3 yrs older than me) has been fighting liver cancer for a year. He went to the hospital for an appointment to be checked and they ended up admitting him because his kidneys are failing. My Sister-in-law just called to tell me she was told his bloodwork came back with very bad numbers and that he " could go at any time ". Everyone knew this was coming but noone expected it to be now. We were hoping he could be at home with hospice when this day came, he hates the hospital and is always so unhappy there.
> As much as we fought as kids we have always been very close and he has always been my big brother who was there for me and vice a versa. I don't know what I will do without him. I am very worried for my parents too as I know how hard this will be on them and on my sister-in-law. I'm a mess.



Sending prayers and hugs to you and your family, dear heart. I am so sorry for your brother.


----------



## Famouslastwords

sugar and spice said:


> My heart feels like it is breaking. My brother ( 3 yrs older than me) has been fighting liver cancer for a year. He went to the hospital for an appointment to be checked and they ended up admitting him because his kidneys are failing. My Sister-in-law just called to tell me she was told his bloodwork came back with very bad numbers and that he " could go at any time ". Everyone knew this was coming but noone expected it to be now. We were hoping he could be at home with hospice when this day came, he hates the hospital and is always so unhappy there.
> As much as we fought as kids we have always been very close and he has always been my big brother who was there for me and vice a versa. I don't know what I will do without him. I am very worried for my parents too as I know how hard this will be on them and on my sister-in-law. I'm a mess.





CurvyEm said:


> How heartbroken my husband is after finding out his father had passed away. He was the best father in law I could have asked for and was only 62. I wish I could take Niks pain away.



I'm so sorry for you ladies. I hope it gets better. All I can really offer is some hugs ((((HUGS))))


----------



## Luv2BNaughty

sugar and spice said:


> My heart feels like it is breaking. My brother ( 3 yrs older than me) has been fighting liver cancer for a year. He went to the hospital for an appointment to be checked and they ended up admitting him because his kidneys are failing. My Sister-in-law just called to tell me she was told his bloodwork came back with very bad numbers and that he " could go at any time ". Everyone knew this was coming but noone expected it to be now. We were hoping he could be at home with hospice when this day came, he hates the hospital and is always so unhappy there.
> As much as we fought as kids we have always been very close and he has always been my big brother who was there for me and vice a versa. I don't know what I will do without him. I am very worried for my parents too as I know how hard this will be on them and on my sister-in-law. I'm a mess.





CurvyEm said:


> How heartbroken my husband is after finding out his father had passed away. He was the best father in law I could have asked for and was only 62. I wish I could take Niks pain away.



((hugs)) for you ladies..my thoughts are with you guys..

I'm also sad for the fact that next month will mark 10 years that Dale Earnhardt has been gone. I may be ridiculed for this but the fact is that we were such fans of his, it was as if he was a member of our own family. Nascar just isn't the same without him...


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

sugar and spice said:


> My heart feels like it is breaking. My brother ( 3 yrs older than me) has been fighting liver cancer for a year. He went to the hospital for an appointment to be checked and they ended up admitting him because his kidneys are failing. My Sister-in-law just called to tell me she was told his bloodwork came back with very bad numbers and that he " could go at any time ". Everyone knew this was coming but noone expected it to be now. We were hoping he could be at home with hospice when this day came, he hates the hospital and is always so unhappy there.
> As much as we fought as kids we have always been very close and he has always been my big brother who was there for me and vice a versa. I don't know what I will do without him. I am very worried for my parents too as I know how hard this will be on them and on my sister-in-law. I'm a mess.



I am so sorry.  *big, big hugs coming your way*


----------



## penguin

The guy I was seeing/sleeping with ended it, said his heart wasn't in it. It wasn't anything serious, but I felt it had potential. I'll get over it soon enough, but for now, I'm a bit sad.


----------



## shuefly pie

I don't usually post in threads like this because I don't see the benefit of dwelling on the things in my life that are disheartening - no offense intended to those who find the practice therapeutic. 

Having said that, lately the relentlessness of the difficult circumstances in my life have been wearing me out and I feel like I have nowhere else to express it. 

Whaaaaaa - I know. :really sad:


----------



## Uriel

I had forgot that I started this thread... and was just perusing Dims after a year away.


Well, today is the 7 month Anniversary of my mother passing away.

It was very sudden, and she was a couple of hundred miles away, so I wasn't able to be there with her. My father was, however.
A lot of folks don't get along with their parents for whatever reason, but my Mom was literally my best friend,had been all of my life.
I still wake up, thinking that she is in the other room (She lived with me on/off, since my parent's place is up in the mountains, and she usually had to be close to the hospitals down here). I call out to her, thinking that she will respond, find myself subconsciously buying food with her in mind, have to deal with constant reminders, as medical bills and other mail still arrive.


Merlene Edna Koch Fed 22,1940-June 7th,2010.
I miss you Shorty, but I know that I'll see you again.

-Uriel


----------



## Famouslastwords

Not to lessen the pain of people with real pain but...my itunes giftcard pin can't be read so I can't use it and that's making me sad right now.


----------



## Admiral_Snackbar

Also not to lessen the bereavement of previous posters...

I am sad and a bit angry at myself that I keep wasting time here and elsewhere to correct people on the Internet who are quite simply, wrong in their arguments. It's their right to make said arguments, with or without reveling in varying degrees of self-serving ignorance and in some cases trollish behavior, but I get tired of shouting at a wall when it does the equivalent of non-sequitur singsong in response. I engage in too many debates equivalent to a pistol duel where my opponent is using bullshit as ammunition.

I can't tell in some of these cases whether these people are truly that ignorant or are being deliberately obtuse simply to take a contrary position, or believe it's their responsibility to stimulate balanced debate. When you drop a virtual boatload of encyclopedic knowledge on someone regarding a subject like say, astronomy, and they take one look and go "Ya know, I like the Sun. It's like the king of all the planets..." I can't help but be a bit discouraged, angry, and irritated by the prideful idiocy exemplified in the human species. 

I'm not asking people to agree with me or drop rep or reveal that I triggered some sort of watershed moment where the scales were lifted from their eyes and they became open to new ways of thinking, I simply hate what has become the intellectual equivalent of conspicuous consumption, where I'm building a beautiful guitar out of reason and logic, only to see Pete Townshend play around with it for a bit and then smash it on stage as the crowd cheers.


----------



## Inhibited

Admiral_Snackbar said:


> Also not to lessen the bereavement of previous posters...
> 
> I am sad and a bit angry at myself that I keep wasting time here and elsewhere to correct people on the Internet who are quite simply, wrong in their arguments. It's their right to make said arguments, with or without reveling in varying degrees of self-serving ignorance and in some cases trollish behavior, but I get tired of shouting at a wall when it does the equivalent of non-sequitur singsong in response. I engage in too many debates equivalent to a pistol duel where my opponent is using bullshit as ammunition.
> 
> I can't tell in some of these cases whether these people are truly that ignorant or are being deliberately obtuse simply to take a contrary position, or believe it's their responsibility to stimulate balanced debate. When you drop a virtual boatload of encyclopedic knowledge on someone regarding a subject like say, astronomy, and they take one look and go "Ya know, I like the Sun. It's like the king of all the planets..." I can't help but be a bit discouraged, angry, and irritated by the prideful idiocy exemplified in the human species.
> 
> I'm not asking people to agree with me or drop rep or reveal that I triggered some sort of watershed moment where the scales were lifted from their eyes and they became open to new ways of thinking, I simply hate what has become the intellectual equivalent of conspicuous consumption, where I'm building a beautiful guitar out of reason and logic, only to see Pete Townshend play around with it for a bit and then smash it on stage as the crowd cheers.



Totally agree.. thats why i'm sometimes in my own little world on Dims.


----------



## sophie44

missing a special friend


----------



## Oirish

The song "Videotape" off Radiohead's "In Rainbows" album. I've heard it dozens of times but for some reason it's really hit my heart strings today. It's a bit morose and very beautiful. I'm hesitant to say it but I do have some tears right now, hearing it replay in my head over and over with it's hopeless refrain.


----------



## ButlerGirl09

I wish I didn't have to post in this thread so frequently...

But right now I'm sad because my brother was injured in an apartment fire. He's in a medically induced coma and will be for at least another 48 hours. His breathing and respiratory issues are the biggest concern now and he's at high risk for developing pneumonia. A breathing tube is inserted and his oxygen had to be increased today. The doctors already did skin grafts on his head and we'll know on Wednesday if he needs surgery to have more on his arms.

<sigh> Always something...


----------



## AmazingAmy

ButlerGirl09 said:


> I wish I didn't have to post in this thread so frequently...
> 
> But right now I'm sad because my brother was injured in an apartment fire. He's in a medically induced coma and will be for at least another 48 hours. His breathing and respiratory issues are the biggest concern now and he's at high risk for developing pneumonia. A breathing tube is inserted and his oxygen had to be increased today. The doctors already did skin grafts on his head and we'll know on Wednesday if he needs surgery to have more on his arms.
> 
> <sigh> Always something...



I'm very sorry to hear this and hope the best for your brother's recovery. As some say here on Dims, healing vibes going your way. *Hugs*


----------



## sugar and spice

ButlerGirl09 said:


> I wish I didn't have to post in this thread so frequently...
> 
> But right now I'm sad because my brother was injured in an apartment fire. He's in a medically induced coma and will be for at least another 48 hours. His breathing and respiratory issues are the biggest concern now and he's at high risk for developing pneumonia. A breathing tube is inserted and his oxygen had to be increased today. The doctors already did skin grafts on his head and we'll know on Wednesday if he needs surgery to have more on his arms.
> 
> <sigh> Always something...



I'm so sorry, I know this is a very scary time for everyone. I hope your brother will do well and I will keep him and your family in my prayers.


----------



## penguin

The flooding in Queensland, especially in Toowoomba at the moment. It's pretty horrific stuff. All that water is going to be heading down to Brisbane in the next day or so, too.


----------



## littlefairywren

ButlerGirl09 said:


> I wish I didn't have to post in this thread so frequently...
> 
> But right now I'm sad because my brother was injured in an apartment fire. He's in a medically induced coma and will be for at least another 48 hours. His breathing and respiratory issues are the biggest concern now and he's at high risk for developing pneumonia. A breathing tube is inserted and his oxygen had to be increased today. The doctors already did skin grafts on his head and we'll know on Wednesday if he needs surgery to have more on his arms.
> 
> <sigh> Always something...



Sending prayers for your brother, BG. Lots of (((((((hugs))))))) for you.



penguin said:


> The flooding in Queensland, especially in Toowoomba at the moment. It's pretty horrific stuff. All that water is going to be heading down to Brisbane in the next day or so, too.



Are you going to be alright through this, pengiun? I don't ever remember seeing floods in Australia of this magnitude before, and it keeps getting worse. Those poor people


----------



## penguin

littlefairywren said:


> Are you going to be alright through this, pengiun? I don't ever remember seeing floods in Australia of this magnitude before, and it keeps getting worse. Those poor people



I'm fine where I am, though we do have a creek right behind the house that can flood the park with enough rain. It's never been any sort of threat to my house, but with the wall of water due to hit Brisbane in the next 24 hours, it might make it fill up more. I've never experienced weather like this before either. I've heard that we're getting more water than the '74 floods, and those were devastating here. But what happened in Toowoomba, it's just incredibly scary.


----------



## MisticalMisty

ButlerGirl09 said:


> I wish I didn't have to post in this thread so frequently...
> 
> But right now I'm sad because my brother was injured in an apartment fire. He's in a medically induced coma and will be for at least another 48 hours. His breathing and respiratory issues are the biggest concern now and he's at high risk for developing pneumonia. A breathing tube is inserted and his oxygen had to be increased today. The doctors already did skin grafts on his head and we'll know on Wednesday if he needs surgery to have more on his arms.
> 
> <sigh> Always something...



Oh my goodness. I am so sorry. If you need anything, please ask!


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

ButlerGirl09 said:


> I wish I didn't have to post in this thread so frequently...
> 
> But right now I'm sad because my brother was injured in an apartment fire. He's in a medically induced coma and will be for at least another 48 hours. His breathing and respiratory issues are the biggest concern now and he's at high risk for developing pneumonia. A breathing tube is inserted and his oxygen had to be increased today. The doctors already did skin grafts on his head and we'll know on Wednesday if he needs surgery to have more on his arms.
> 
> <sigh> Always something...



I am so, so, sorry, honey.  Your brother and your family are in my thoughts. *gentle hugs*



penguin said:


> I'm fine where I am, though we do have a creek right behind the house that can flood the park with enough rain. It's never been any sort of threat to my house, but with the wall of water due to hit Brisbane in the next 24 hours, it might make it fill up more. I've never experienced weather like this before either. I've heard that we're getting more water than the '74 floods, and those were devastating here. But what happened in Toowoomba, it's just incredibly scary.



You're in my thoughts, too, lady, as are the rest of those poor people.


----------



## DitzyBrunette

I'm sad that the guy I'm seeing doesn't seem to care at all that we haven't seen each other in weeks. He's so apathetic about it and I'm so the opposite so... not sure where to go from here.


----------



## ButlerGirl09

AmazingAmy said:


> I'm very sorry to hear this and hope the best for your brother's recovery. As some say here on Dims, healing vibes going your way. *Hugs*





sugar and spice said:


> I'm so sorry, I know this is a very scary time for everyone. I hope your brother will do well and I will keep him and your family in my prayers.





littlefairywren said:


> Sending prayers for your brother, BG. Lots of (((((((hugs))))))) for you.





MisticalMisty said:


> Oh my goodness. I am so sorry. If you need anything, please ask!





BigBeautifulMe said:


> I am so, so, sorry, honey.  Your brother and your family are in my thoughts. *gentle hugs*



Thank you all so much for your outpouring of love and support!

He's stable right now, but in ICU. Things are going to get a whole lot worse before they get better. I'm glad that I'll be able to go home and visit him and my other family this weekend. I know we all would appreciate your continued thoughts and prayers.


----------



## Surlysomething

ButlerGirl09 said:


> I wish I didn't have to post in this thread so frequently...
> 
> But right now I'm sad because my brother was injured in an apartment fire. He's in a medically induced coma and will be for at least another 48 hours. His breathing and respiratory issues are the biggest concern now and he's at high risk for developing pneumonia. A breathing tube is inserted and his oxygen had to be increased today. The doctors already did skin grafts on his head and we'll know on Wednesday if he needs surgery to have more on his arms.
> 
> <sigh> Always something...


 
Damn. I'm so sorry to hear this happened. Sending lots of good vibes your way.


----------



## Bigtigmom

DitzyBrunette said:


> I'm sad that the guy I'm seeing doesn't seem to care at all that we haven't seen each other in weeks. He's so apathetic about it and I'm so the opposite so... not sure where to go from here.



We are women and we are just wired differently. Sorry you are having a tough time. ((((hugs))))


----------



## spiritangel

Big hugs to those of you who need them well all of you 

lots of sad stuff going on


I am sad because a friend of mine who is an amazing soul cant seem to catch a break and her life just seems to be getting worse and worse and there is nothing I can do to help because I live to far away


----------



## snuggletiger

Sad about the fiasco in Tucson. Sad if American Democracy has taken an all time low, bummed about crazy people running around with guns shooting so indiscriminately, sad and angry about the hatemongers who continually push this agenda of hate and armed rebellion.


----------



## Bigtigmom

ButlerGirl09 said:


> I wish I didn't have to post in this thread so frequently...
> 
> But right now I'm sad because my brother was injured in an apartment fire. He's in a medically induced coma and will be for at least another 48 hours. His breathing and respiratory issues are the biggest concern now and he's at high risk for developing pneumonia. A breathing tube is inserted and his oxygen had to be increased today. The doctors already did skin grafts on his head and we'll know on Wednesday if he needs surgery to have more on his arms.
> 
> <sigh> Always something...



I'm so sorry your brother and your family are going through this. I've been through some very trying times like this also. Just try to be strong and take it day by day. I wish you all the strength to get through this.




penguin said:


> The flooding in Queensland, especially in Toowoomba at the moment. It's pretty horrific stuff. All that water is going to be heading down to Brisbane in the next day or so, too.



So sorry to hear about the flooding. Water is one of the elements that can leave you defenseless. I hope it receeds asap for all in that area. 



sugar and spice said:


> My heart feels like it is breaking. My brother ( 3 yrs older than me) has been fighting liver cancer for a year. He went to the hospital for an appointment to be checked and they ended up admitting him because his kidneys are failing. My Sister-in-law just called to tell me she was told his bloodwork came back with very bad numbers and that he " could go at any time ". Everyone knew this was coming but noone expected it to be now. We were hoping he could be at home with hospice when this day came, he hates the hospital and is always so unhappy there.
> As much as we fought as kids we have always been very close and he has always been my big brother who was there for me and vice a versa. I don't know what I will do without him. I am very worried for my parents too as I know how hard this will be on them and on my sister-in-law. I'm a mess.



No matter how much you think you are ready for things like this, you just aren't. I speak from experience. My husband passed away at the age of 39 from stomach Cancer that also spread to his brain. He left behind 2 little girls and no matter how well you think you've prepared for all the possibilities, things can change so quickly. I wish you and your family the strength and the courage to face these most difficult times. (((Hugs)))


----------



## spiritangel

I hurt someone today  it wasnt intentional but sometimes we have to face the truth and the truth can be a bitter pill to swallow the worst part is I feel like I have lost a good friend in the process


----------



## GTAFA

spiritangel said:


> I hurt someone today  it wasnt intentional but sometimes we have to face the truth and the truth can be a bitter pill to swallow the worst part is I feel like I have lost a good friend in the process



Don't be hard on yourself because you didn't see this coming; your faith in the other person (the reason you trusted them enough to be truthful) is the reason you inadvertently hurt them, and it's an admirable quality.

Sorry for your loss. Sometimes it's a difficult choice, between the truth and saying something that's less upsetting to the other person.


----------



## FatAndProud

I ran out of milk for my mint oreo cookies


----------



## CastingPearls

The day I stopped looking for closure was the day I found it but it was a painful lesson to learn.


----------



## HottiMegan

Max makes me sad. I just don't think i'll ever do enough or be good enough to sustain his happiness.


----------



## JerseyGirl07093

HottiMegan said:


> Max makes me sad. I just don't think i'll ever do enough or be good enough to sustain his happiness.



((HUG)) That's for both you and Max. We always want what's best for our kids and it's hard to think that they will have any hardships in their lives. Being a parent is the hardest job in the world. Sometimes you just have to realize that your best _is_ good enough.


----------



## CleverBomb

JerseyGirl07093 said:


> ((HUG)) That's for both you and Max. We always want what's best for our kids and it's hard to think that they will have any hardships in their lives. Being a parent is the hardest job in the world. Sometimes you just have to realize that your best _is_ good enough.


She is so right about this!

-Rusty


----------



## furious styles

probably chemicals


----------



## CastingPearls

Rejection ...


----------



## Saoirse

No sweat with my boys tonight cause someone backed out. Boooooooo! Me and D were really looking forward to it. But hopefully it will happen soon. We just have to keep nagging Samurai about it!


----------



## Mozz

I would have to say gas prices.... i dont like payin 40+ bucks when i fill up


----------



## Mishty

I've been voted the friend that gets to sit down with The Friend, and tell her she's making bad choices with her daughter. I don't even have kids, but now I've got to look her dead in the eye and tell her to pull her shit together.

Bad parents put a bad taste in my mouth....


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Mishty said:


> I've been voted the friend that gets to sit down with The Friend, and tell her she's making bad choices with her daughter. I don't even have kids, but now I've got to look her dead in the eye and tell her to pull her shit together.
> 
> Bad parents put a bad taste in my mouth....



If you don't have kids she's probably just going to dismiss what you have to say that way. None of your group of friends has kids? Might be better if one of them were the person to talk to her.


----------



## Bigtigmom

Oh, how I wish I could say what I want, but I can't because that would be considered improper and disrespectful. The offender knows what they did and I hope they have a nice long meeting with Karma which will visit them one day. 

I'm also sad because now I feel as though this site is tainted with negative feelings due to issue mentioned above. It used to make me happy to come read the boards but now not so much.


----------



## CastingPearls

Bigtigmom said:


> Oh, how I wish I could say what I want, but I can't because that would be considered improper and disrespectful. The offender knows what they did and I hope they have a nice long meeting with Karma which will visit them one day.
> 
> I'm also sad because now I feel as though this site is tainted with negative feelings due to issue mentioned above. It used to make me happy to come read the boards but now not so much.


Please stay. I like having you here. Hugs.


----------



## Mishty

BigBeautifulMe said:


> If you don't have kids she's probably just going to dismiss what you have to say that way. None of your group of friends has kids? Might be better if one of them were the person to talk to her.



She considers me her best friend and the problem is bringing guys she's dating, or just having sexual relationships around her three year old daughter, she knows better but I'm the only one that really knows the details, it's a tough situation to be sure, but she's not a bad person, and she's very sensitive and won't be angry, she's going to be upset.  I can handle anger better than tears.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Mishty said:


> She considers me her best friend and the problem is bringing guys she's dating, or just having sexual relationships around her three year old daughter, she knows better but I'm the only one that really knows the details, it's a tough situation to be sure, but she's not a bad person, and she's very sensitive and won't be angry, she's going to be upset.  I can handle anger better than tears.



Ooof, I'm sorry honey, that's a rough situation to be in.  *Big supportive hugs* I wish you luck talking to her.


----------



## CleverBomb

CastingPearls said:


> Please stay. I like having you here. Hugs.


Very much agreed. Do stay, please. 

-Rusty


----------



## ThatFatGirl

This photo.. the tragedy all around.


----------



## Bigtigmom

CastingPearls said:


> Please stay. I like having you here. Hugs.



Thanks Elaine!! I like you too!!


CleverBomb said:


> Very much agreed. Do stay, please.
> 
> -Rusty



Thanks Rusty!! I shouldn't have to feel this way, but unfortunately it's reality.

I will be disheartened for a while.


----------



## Christov

Desperate need for a haircut that isn't terrible.


----------



## Inhibited

ThatFatGirl said:


> This photo.. the tragedy all around.



This has just made me sad :-( does anyone know if the dog is being looked after or is it like someone replied he/she will more than likely end up a stray?


----------



## GTAFA

We had a policeman who died in the line of duty here in Toronto, leaving a young son, slightly reminiscent of JFK junior (only YOUNGER). I read the following prayer in a newspaper, and can't seem to get it out of my mind. While it's sad, I feel very fortunate for all I have and grateful for the people who protect us in the night, both at home & abroad.


----------



## Lamia

hmmm I would have to say Cancer...Cancer is making me sad....If cancer had a face I would curb stomp it. 

At the top of 2010 My mom's best friend lost her husband to cancer and the day of his funeral her other best friend found out she had cancer. She passed away at the end of this year. My cousin has been battling cancer since the top of 2010. It's now progressed from her colon and liver to her stomach and lungs. My step-mom just lost her twin sister on X-mas day to cancer. 

My best friend of 38 years just lost her dad to cancer yesterday. He went in to fix a stomach lesion and they had to remove his entire stomach because it was filled with cancerous tumors which were also in his liver and colon. He suffered for almost a month before he succombed. 

My other best friend is trying to deal with her mother's ailments diabetes, congestive hearrt failure etc. She's been struggling with trying to take care of her mother for almost 3 years now. 

My cousin had kidneys stones removed recently and they nicked her kidney she walked around for a week and almost bled to death. The day she went into the hospital her son also went in to the hospital and had to have two pints of blood. He was diagnosed with Good Pastures disease. They released him yesterday and he collapsed 2 hours later. His lung hemoraged. He is now in an medical induced coma. He's only 21 years old. 

My grandmother has been in and out of the ICU with multiple heart attacks. 

All of this sickness and pain fills me with grief. It just seems to be coming from all sides and to everyone.


----------



## Mishty

Wasting my breath and time on people in general, is making me pretty damn sad.
I think a lot of my real life drama is created by me, letting people slide and get away with stupid and inconsiderate things, then when all the crap builds up into a castle of bullshit, I'm right there with a shovel and boots.

I just want to wash my hands of all of it, and all of them, but my heart is attached, and my faith in change is still alive, makes me one of the biggest fools of all.


----------



## Surlysomething

Lamia said:


> hmmm I would have to say Cancer...Cancer is making me sad....If cancer had a face I would curb stomp it.
> 
> At the top of 2010 My mom's best friend lost her husband to cancer and the day of his funeral her other best friend found out she had cancer. She passed away at the end of this year. My cousin has been battling cancer since the top of 2010. It's now progressed from her colon and liver to her stomach and lungs. My step-mom just lost her twin sister on X-mas day to cancer.
> 
> My best friend of 38 years just lost her dad to cancer yesterday. He went in to fix a stomach lesion and they had to remove his entire stomach because it was filled with cancerous tumors which were also in his liver and colon. He suffered for almost a month before he succombed.
> 
> My other best friend is trying to deal with her mother's ailments diabetes, congestive hearrt failure etc. She's been struggling with trying to take care of her mother for almost 3 years now.
> 
> My cousin had kidneys stones removed recently and they nicked her kidney she walked around for a week and almost bled to death. The day she went into the hospital her son also went in to the hospital and had to have two pints of blood. He was diagnosed with Good Pastures disease. They released him yesterday and he collapsed 2 hours later. His lung hemoraged. He is now in an medical induced coma. He's only 21 years old.
> 
> My grandmother has been in and out of the ICU with multiple heart attacks.
> 
> All of this sickness and pain fills me with grief. It just seems to be coming from all sides and to everyone.


 
Holy crap. I'm so sorry you have to go through all of this.
I hope you have a good support system. Talking to people about it does make it better. 

Find some peace in things you love to do. Take time to enjoy the moment. I know it's very hard, i've been there. 

Hang in there, girlie.


----------



## Surlysomething

Mishty said:


> Wasting my breath and time on people in general, is making me pretty damn sad.
> I think a lot of my real life drama is created by me, letting people slide and get away with stupid and inconsiderate things, then when all the crap builds up into a castle of bullshit, I'm right there with a shovel and boots.
> 
> I just want to wash my hands of all of it, and all of them, but my heart is attached, and my faith in change is still alive, makes me one of the biggest fools of all.


 

You're not a fool. You just have a big heart.
And it really is ok to let go of people. I've had to and as much as it pained me, in the long run it was for the best.

Be true to yourself.


----------



## CAMellie

Today is my late husband's birthday. I always get sad on his birthday and the day he died.

Happy Birthday, Kerry! I miss you.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

I've slipped back into old ways...


----------



## KingColt

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4JDupjE3DTE&NR=1 This show was cancelled. 10 years ago. A tragedy.


----------



## RJ20

I really wanted this girl to be my friend and get to know me better. But I'm not even a friend I'm just some guy an "acquaintance".


----------



## Lovelyone

I removed my dating ad. The foraging through the ads to try to find someone compatible, the scammers from Nigeria and Ghana, the responses from men who live outside the country and couldn't possibly "date" me, the men who responded who were of interest to me but ended up only wanting to collect fat girl pics and cyber chat, the men who respond to an ad when they have NO intention of actually dating the person they are responding to...disgusted me to the point of taking my ad down. I seriously am going to give up and learn how to live a happy existence without a partner. 
Its just too hard to try to date and my faith in the system is 100% gone..

let me break it down:
70 responses to my ad
- 30 from scammers
-----------------
40 responses left
- 30 either too young, too old, too far away, not interesting, etc.
-----------------
10 left
- 7 who only wanted cyber chat, pics, etc
-----------------
3 left
-2 who seem to have only wanted a penpal
----------------
1 left 

I went out with him on Monday. Dinner--a movie--and a soak in a hot tub. I had a really nice time (other than a hard time getting out of a slippery hot tub). I liked him a lot. He treated me very well ,walked me to my door, kissed me, and left never to be heard from again. *sigh 
I GIVE UP.


----------



## b0nnie

I finally told the guy I was talking to that I loved him and he _thanked_ me.:really sad:


----------



## MisticalMisty

b0nnie said:


> I finally told the guy I was talking to that I loved him and he _thanked_ me.:really sad:



Hang in there. My husband did the same thing. He wasn't ready to say it..and that was ok..because I knew he would eventually


----------



## cinnamitch

I just found out that they guy i was madly in love with as a senior in High School died this past Tuesday. Our split was not amicable, in fact another girl broke us up ( oh the high school angst) and shortly after graduation he went into the Navy and we went our separate ways. He was a few months older than me. Sad night here .:really sad:


----------



## Lamia

My best friends dad's funeral was yesterday. I am so sad. He was only 60 years old. We've been friends since we were 3. He was a great dad and great guy. He had a childlike enthusiasm for every hobby he had. He was gentle and intelligent. This is going to sound bad, but I can't help but think of all the pieces of crap that are still walking around and wonder why him and why not them? It's not the kind of attitude I enjoy having and I try not to feel that way, but everytime I see news about the shooter in Arizona I keep thinking why couldn't that piece of shit have died with a belly full of tumors instead of Brad.


----------



## Bigtigmom

Missing someone special and hoping to rectify things. Still feeling very confused.


----------



## Famouslastwords

cinnamitch said:


> I just found out that they guy i was madly in love with as a senior in High School died this past Tuesday. Our split was not amicable, in fact another girl broke us up ( oh the high school angst) and shortly after graduation he went into the Navy and we went our separate ways. He was a few months older than me. Sad night here .:really sad:



Awwww Cinnamitch, I wish I had read this before you logged off yahoo tonight I would have offered my condolences. <3 you girlfriend.


----------



## Fallenangel2904

As I sit here feeling rather lonely and watch Golden Girls reruns, it makes me sad that these woman-though fictional-are triple my age and are getting a hell of alot more dates then I am. Sad but true.


----------



## 1love_emily

I'm sad that the boy I thought liked me doesn't actually like me that way. He wants us to be friends. He told our mutual friend that he "wouldn't say never, but his interests lie elsewhere now." He thinks I'm "a cool person" and "tight". 

I really like him.

Friend zone saddness.


----------



## 1love_emily

Fallenangel2904 said:


> As I sit here feeling rather lonely and watch Golden Girls reruns, it makes me sad that these woman-though fictional-are triple my age and are getting a hell of alot more dates then I am. Sad but true.



I hear yah, I hear yah. I'll go on a date with you 

But I know. I haven't been on a legit date since I was broken up with last October.


----------



## Fallenangel2904

1love_emily said:


> I hear yah, I hear yah. I'll go on a date with you
> 
> But I know. I haven't been on a legit date since I was broken up with last October.



I'm game!  haha! Yea I hear ya. Haven't been on a date since my ex. Taking me way too long to recover from this breakup it seems. Eh. 

Btw that guy who friend zoned you is a jerk. Let's just run away together!


----------



## shuefly pie

It's been a week since a friend had a brain aneurysm. 

She died on Wednesday. The memorial service was yesterday.

I still can't believe she's gone. 

Just like that. 

Gone.


----------



## penguin

shuefly pie said:


> It's been a week since a friend had a brain aneurysm.
> 
> She died on Wednesday. The memorial service was yesterday.
> 
> I still can't believe she's gone.
> 
> Just like that.
> 
> Gone.



I'm so sorry.


----------



## Bigtigmom

shuefly pie said:


> It's been a week since a friend had a brain aneurysm.
> 
> She died on Wednesday. The memorial service was yesterday.
> 
> I still can't believe she's gone.
> 
> Just like that.
> 
> Gone.



I'm so sorry for your loss.


----------



## JoyJoy

Basically...everything. I am, by nature, an optimist, but my life is in a period where literally every single aspect of my life has difficulties, none of which on their own are insurmountable, but with them all piled on top of me, most days lately it's all I can do to get out of bed. I'm exhausted - mentally, physically and spiritually, and being expected to keep others propped up too, I have very little to give anyone, including myself. I want to find my sunshine again, but it's going to take some work. 

Also, more than anything else, I'm sad that the silence I've allowed to become habit while behind my walls hurt someone I care deeply about.


----------



## CastingPearls

shuefly pie said:


> It's been a week since a friend had a brain aneurysm.
> 
> She died on Wednesday. The memorial service was yesterday.
> 
> I still can't believe she's gone.
> 
> Just like that.
> 
> Gone.


Very very sorry for your loss.


----------



## CastingPearls

JoyJoy said:


> Basically...everything. I am, by nature, an optimist, but my life is in a period where literally every single aspect of my life has difficulties, none of which on their own are insurmountable, but with them all piled on top of me, most days lately it's all I can do to get out of bed. I'm exhausted - mentally, physically and spiritually, and being expected to keep others propped up too, I have very little to give anyone, including myself. I want to find my sunshine again, but it's going to take some work.
> 
> Also, more than anything else, I'm sad that the silence I've allowed to become habit while behind my walls hurt someone I care deeply about.


Hugs hugs hugs hugs hugs


----------



## shuefly pie

Thanks for y'all's kindness.


----------



## Luv2BNaughty

That my sweetie is sick and I can't be up there to take care of him


----------



## Lovelyone

reading about that bombing in Russia is making me sad.


----------



## CastingPearls

A dear friend's mother passed away and I won't be able to make the wake or funeral because of the snowstorm. When my mother died, at the time she was only an acquaintance but she traveled a considerable distance to be there for me and it touched me and still does, even today. She was as close to her mom as I was to mine so this hurts on so many levels. I wish I could ease her pain.


----------



## AuntHen

I am "back-burner" girl.


----------



## fluffyandcute

Found out that I not only have MS but possibly have Fibro to go along with it.....not a happy camper!


----------



## Surlysomething

fluffyandcute said:


> Found out that I not only have MS but possibly have Fibro to go along with it.....not a happy camper!


 

Oh man, i'm sorry to hear that. I've been waiting for MS testing for awhile so I feel you.


----------



## riplee

CastingPearls said:


> A dear friend's mother passed away and I won't be able to make the wake or funeral because of the snowstorm. When my mother died, at the time she was only an acquaintance but she traveled a considerable distance to be there for me and it touched me and still does, even today. She was as close to her mom as I was to mine so this hurts on so many levels. I wish I could ease her pain.



Write her a letter. Receiving a letter is a great comfort under any circumstances.


----------



## Heyyou

Went to the gym.. didnt like it.


----------



## Gentleman Zombie

I'm kinda sad because my faithful companion, Rambo, a 13 year old Doberman Pincer is going to need to be put down soon. I got him as a rescue, he had been abused and neglected, I gave him love, cookies, toys, everything a boy could want, and he's been an absolute joy. He's old and rickety and falls down and whines a lot, and it's been very sad to watch his decline.

A few years ago he would steal anything that he could pick up, books, magazines, the TV remote. He's pile all his swag in a corner and growl (playfully) at you if you tried to take it back, the only way he'd let you get your stuff back is if you gave him a treat first, what a little joker. 

He used to stand in the garage next to the car and bark when he wanted a ride. I'd give in take him for a spin around the block...

I'm really gonna miss this guy.


----------



## spiritangel

Lots and lots of big squishy hugs to everyone

I am sad cause I blew my budget so now any money from doing readings has to go straight to things like bills and getting to the drs


----------



## GTAFA

I just read something on this site that really creeped me out. Yes I know, one might say this thread is "*What is making you SAD right now...", *not "*What is creeping you OUT right now..."*. But what disturbed me is that a few people seem to like this story.

So i guess i am feeling old and conservative. Rather than complaining about the story --which seems to be within the community's boundaries-- i came here to express my sadness.


----------



## CastingPearls

Gentleman Zombie said:


> I'm kinda sad because my faithful companion, Rambo, a 13 year old Doberman Pincer is going to need to be put down soon. I got him as a rescue, he had been abused and neglected, I gave him love, cookies, toys, everything a boy could want, and he's been an absolute joy. He's old and rickety and falls down and whines a lot, and it's been very sad to watch his decline.
> 
> A few years ago he would steal anything that he could pick up, books, magazines, the TV remote. He's pile all his swag in a corner and growl (playfully) at you if you tried to take it back, the only way he'd let you get your stuff back is if you gave him a treat first, what a little joker.
> 
> He used to stand in the garage next to the car and bark when he wanted a ride. I'd give in take him for a spin around the block...
> 
> I'm really gonna miss this guy.


So sorry about your little buddy. Hugs.


----------



## Heyyou

Gentleman Zombie said:


> I'm kinda sad because my faithful companion, Rambo, a 13 year old Doberman Pincer is going to need to be put down soon. I got him as a rescue, he had been abused and neglected, I gave him love, cookies, toys, everything a boy could want, and he's been an absolute joy. He's old and rickety and falls down and whines a lot, and it's been very sad to watch his decline.
> 
> A few years ago he would steal anything that he could pick up, books, magazines, the TV remote. He's pile all his swag in a corner and growl (playfully) at you if you tried to take it back, the only way he'd let you get your stuff back is if you gave him a treat first, what a little joker.
> 
> He used to stand in the garage next to the car and bark when he wanted a ride. I'd give in take him for a spin around the block...
> 
> I'm really gonna miss this guy.



Its hard when they go. 



(Im "tearing" thinking about my furry friends i had to leave behind. I hope I see them again. They are my best friends.)


----------



## Lamia

My cousin just lost her battle with cancer. So this will be the second funeral for me to go to in 2 weeks. My ex-sister in law's mother died today as well. I feel so bad for the ones who are truly feeling the loss.


----------



## HottiMegan

I'm kind of sad that my father in law is driving to our town for some bird nerd event and hasn't even scheduled a couple hours to see us. He lives 4 hours away and we don't see him often. You'd think he could spend a dinner out with us or just a few measly hours! I feel so left of so much from this family. He's taking my older boy to two events but planned nothing for the rest of us. It stings...


----------



## snuggletiger

Ugh you got to hate grandparents who play favorites


----------



## AmazingAmy

I'm not allowed the last slice of chocolate cake. It's for the my sister WHO IS NEVER HERE.


----------



## snuggletiger

ya can't like shim some of her slice down so it looks like she still has a slice?


----------



## penguin

AmazingAmy said:


> I'm not allowed the last slice of chocolate cake. It's for the my sister WHO IS NEVER HERE.



I'm thinking of making some of my infamous choc mint cake with cream cheese icing (depending on how hot it is today). You can come over and have cake and wine. I'll share!


----------



## CastingPearls

AmazingAmy said:


> I'm not allowed the last slice of chocolate cake. It's for the my sister WHO IS NEVER HERE.


Make it disappear and leave a note reading, 'I'M THE CAKE THAT ISN'T HERE'.

Srsly, what's your mom gonna do if it mysteriously runs off?


----------



## snuggletiger

Friend of mine getting treated for MS. Nice lady doesn't deserve it.


----------



## Luv2BNaughty

snuggletiger said:


> Ugh you got to hate grandparents who play favorites



And parents too..who play favorites towards their kids..AND their grandkids. Ah well, their loss, I say! I have made the mental agreement with myself, months ago, that I am no longer going to strive for my mother's acceptance. And I have been a lot happier since doing so.


----------



## AuntHen

CastingPearls said:


> Make it disappear and leave a note reading, 'I'M THE CAKE THAT ISN'T HERE'.
> 
> Srsly, what's your mom gonna do if it mysteriously runs off?




haha... I would have already been licking my fingers in my closet hehehehehe "What??!! The cake is gone??!! Huh? No! That's a mud mask, not chocolate pshhhh"


----------



## mossystate

Lamia said:


> My cousin just lost her battle with cancer. So this will be the second funeral for me to go to in 2 weeks. My ex-sister in law's mother died today as well. I feel so bad for the ones who are truly feeling the loss.



So sorry, Lamia.


----------



## spiritangel

that yet another forum seems to have bitten the dust for me


----------



## penguin

More mad than sad, but my ex is being a total douche, yet again. It's sad for my daughter, because he'll insist on using lawyers instead of manning up and talking to me directly, but won't put anywhere near that effort in actually being INVOLVED in her life.


----------



## Linda

Too many deaths in my life lately and tomorrow I am attending yet another funeral.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Linda said:


> Too many deaths in my life lately and tomorrow I am attending yet another funeral.



*Hugs* Linda.  I am so sorry.


----------



## littlefairywren

Lamia said:


> My cousin just lost her battle with cancer. So this will be the second funeral for me to go to in 2 weeks. My ex-sister in law's mother died today as well. I feel so bad for the ones who are truly feeling the loss.



I am so sorry, Lamia 



Linda said:


> Too many deaths in my life lately and tomorrow I am attending yet another funeral.



Soft hugs ((((((((((Linda))))))))))))


----------



## OneWickedAngel

Linda said:


> Too many deaths in my life lately and tomorrow I am attending yet another funeral.



{{{ Linda }}} I've attended three funerals, three weeks in a row just this month, I know how you feel. :wubu:


----------



## Bigtigmom

Gentleman Zombie said:


> I'm kinda sad because my faithful companion, Rambo, a 13 year old Doberman Pincer is going to need to be put down soon. I got him as a rescue, he had been abused and neglected, I gave him love, cookies, toys, everything a boy could want, and he's been an absolute joy. He's old and rickety and falls down and whines a lot, and it's been very sad to watch his decline.
> 
> A few years ago he would steal anything that he could pick up, books, magazines, the TV remote. He's pile all his swag in a corner and growl (playfully) at you if you tried to take it back, the only way he'd let you get your stuff back is if you gave him a treat first, what a little joker.
> 
> He used to stand in the garage next to the car and bark when he wanted a ride. I'd give in take him for a spin around the block...
> 
> I'm really gonna miss this guy.



I'm so sorry.  I know exactly what you're going through and/or about to go through. I had to put my dog down and it was very hard to watch. As hard as it is to watch you have to be strong and comfort them as they pass on. It is the very last and often the best gift you can give to your faithful furry companion. After all they gave you the best they had to give everyday. Being animal lovers, death is something that is inevitable and cannot be gotten used to. No matter how hard it is to deal with the loss of a pet, we choose to share our lives with animals because there is simply nothing that compares to the benefits. A furry face that doesn't judge you and is always happy to see you no matter what state of mind you are in, LOL. I have had to put many of our pets to sleep mostly because of old age and failure to thrive. Just know that there are people here who can relate and we also grieve with you. I wish you the strength to get through this very sad time.


----------



## Bigtigmom

AmazingAmy said:


> I'm not allowed the last slice of chocolate cake. It's for the my sister WHO IS NEVER HERE.



I just bought a chocolate cake the other day, if you were closer I would totally share with you and even give you extra icing.


----------



## sirGordy

Ad hominem attacks on the character of a person. I wish that even though you may not agree with a person, at least respect their dignity, and not lampoon nor denigrate them. All people deserve the dignity given to them by God. Just my thoughts....


----------



## Linda

Not being able to be there in person for someone I love when they need me the most.


----------



## Heyyou

sirGordy said:


> Ad hominem attacks on the character of a person. I wish that even though you may not agree with a person, at least respect their dignity, and not lampoon nor denigrate them. All people deserve the dignity given to them by God. Just my thoughts....



A good God fearing man. God bless you, sir!

We should do unto others as we would have done ubnto ourselves.

Im sad i dont have a Good Book (Bible, King James version) in my house at this time.


----------



## HeavyDuty24

sirGordy said:


> Ad hominem attacks on the character of a person. I wish that even though you may not agree with a person, at least respect their dignity, and not lampoon nor denigrate them. All people deserve the dignity given to them by God. Just my thoughts....




great post Gordy.always words of wisdom from you.


----------



## CleverBomb

sirGordy said:


> Ad hominem attacks on the character of a person. I wish that even though you may not agree with a person, at least respect their dignity, and not lampoon nor denigrate them. All people deserve the dignity given to them by God. Just my thoughts....


Very much so, even if one doesn't necessarily believe in a God as such -- people have an inherent right to dignity by virtue of being human. 

Rec'd.

-Rusty


----------



## succubus_dxb

I know this is silly and superficial, but....

I was just asking the BF what he thought of some clothes i wanted to buy online, and his response was basically 'well I can only think of clothes I like for girls with an hourglass figure, and that doesn't really apply to you. so i dunno. clothes are just so you're not naked anyway' 

eh? what am I? A lump? Does it not matter how I look because i'm not his dream girl


----------



## AuntHen

succubus_dxb said:


> I know this is silly and superficial, but....
> 
> I was just asking the BF what he thought of some clothes i wanted to buy online, and his response was basically 'well I can only think of clothes I like for girls with an hourglass figure, and that doesn't really apply to you. so i dunno. clothes are just so you're not naked anyway'
> 
> eh? what am I? A lump? Does it not matter how I look because i'm not his dream girl



Bobbi,

It's not superficial if it hurt your feelings! You are soo far from a lump! You are totally hour glass, extremely hot, sexy, beautiful etc... I don't know your boyfriend, so I want to be careful here but what he said was stupid!!  AND if you are not his DREAM GIRL well I think there is a long line of dudes that WOULD consider you exactly that and then some!!! He needs to wise up!

Love, Me


----------



## LisaInNC

This song is explains why I am sad.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_U5HpeA_WSo


----------



## penguin

Insomnia. I was getting 5 hours a night (eventually), but the last two have been about 3.5. Not enjoying this.


----------



## mimosa

1.Son's MRI is tomorrow. (deeply worried.)
2. Baby daddy drama
3. No job
4. Medical bills
5. Old love telling me he still loves me. 
6. Erotically charged with no outlet. 

Do I win a prize????


----------



## CastingPearls

succubus_dxb said:


> I know this is silly and superficial, but....
> 
> I was just asking the BF what he thought of some clothes i wanted to buy online, and his response was basically 'well I can only think of clothes I like for girls with an hourglass figure, and that doesn't really apply to you. so i dunno. clothes are just so you're not naked anyway'
> 
> eh? what am I? A lump? Does it not matter how I look because i'm not his dream girl


Not silly or superficial. That was really cutting and would have hurt me. Wow, if you're not his dream girl maybe you need to cut him loose so he can find her and you can move on to someone who knows you ARE his dream girl. I doubt very much you'd have a hard time finding a replacement. Oh, and btw...you do have an hourglass figure...IDK what the hell he's talking about there.


----------



## succubus_dxb

CastingPearls said:


> Not silly or superficial. That was really cutting and would have hurt me. Wow, if you're not his dream girl maybe you need to cut him loose so he can find her and you can move on to someone who knows you ARE his dream girl.




He asked if he had upset me, i said 'no', rolled over and went to sleep- which was probably not the most productive way to deal with the situation...... I will be talking to him about it tomorrow. 


Thanks for your responses girls x


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

fat9276 said:


> Bobbi,
> 
> It's not superficial if it hurt your feelings! You are soo far from a lump! You are totally hour glass, extremely hot, sexy, beautiful etc... I don't know your boyfriend, so I want to be careful here but what he said was stupid!!  AND if you are not his DREAM GIRL well I think there is a long line of dudes that WOULD consider you exactly that and then some!!! He needs to wise up!
> 
> Love, Me





CastingPearls said:


> Not silly or superficial. That was really cutting and would have hurt me. Wow, if you're not his dream girl maybe you need to cut him loose so he can find her and you can move on to someone who knows you ARE his dream girl. I doubt very much you'd have a hard time finding a replacement. Oh, and btw...you do have an hourglass figure...IDK what the hell he's talking about there.



Exactly. Glad you're going to talk to him about it, Bobbi. What an awful thing to say.


----------



## Heyyou

succubus_dxb said:


> I know this is silly and superficial, but....
> 
> I was just asking the BF what he thought of some clothes i wanted to buy online, and his response was basically 'well I can only think of clothes I like for girls with an hourglass figure, and that doesn't really apply to you. so i dunno. clothes are just so you're not naked anyway'
> 
> eh? what am I? A lump? Does it not matter how I look because i'm not his dream girl



Its not silly or superficial because you (rightfully so) picked up on that he just kind of said "dismissed" with that little comment he made.

Translation, from a guy's perspective: "You arent an hourglass, so do whatever the F you want i cant be bothered and do NOT care." Thats the translation of what he said.

Its nice of you to have a "talk with him about it" tomorrow, this is obviously not just some online-only person you can be rude to or just click certain buttons (as many here do) to deal with it in an easy manner, it seems as though a real-life friend.. but many would just kind of act as if you never knew them. Its easier to do that online, if thats one thing here has taught me.

Self-esteem UP! Sounds like he was sick of pretending, and it came out.

Always be honest, and shoe those that dont have love for you to the realm of a roach trap for cockroaches. And if thy try to get bold, and break out of the roach hotel.. Raid MAX their butt. Yes you can. I do, to my ex-friends i call roaches.  Because they dont die... they keep on eating food, and feeding off other roaches, and multiply, and gain strength. Just keep shifting the roach hotel, and apply Raid MAX whenever they pop up. *to this guy, is what most would do.) So nice of you, to "talk to him about it."


----------



## succubus_dxb

Heyyou said:


> Its not silly or superficial because you (rightfully so) picked up on that he just kind of said "dismissed" with that little comment he made.
> 
> Translation, from a guy's perspective: "You arent an hourglass, so do whatever the F you want i cant be bothered and do NOT care." Thats the translation of what he said.
> 
> Its nice of you to have a "talk with him about it" tomorrow, this is obviously not just some online-only person you can be rude to or just click certain buttons (as many here do) to deal with it in an easy manner, it seems as though a real-life friend.. but many would just kind of act as if you never knew them. Its easier to do that online, if thats one thing here has taught me.
> 
> Self-esteem UP! Sounds like he was sick of pretending, and it came out.
> 
> Always be honest, and shoe those that dont have love for you to the realm of a roach trap for cockroaches. And if thy try to get bold, and break out of the roach hotel.. Raid MAX their butt. Yes you can. I do, to my ex-friends i call roaches.  Because they dont die... they keep on eating food, and feeding off other roaches, and multiply, and gain strength. Just keep shifting the roach hotel, and apply Raid MAX whenever they pop up. *to this guy, is what most would do.) So nice of you, to "talk to him about it."



Thanks for calling my boyfriend a cockroach


----------



## succubus_dxb

After getting a bit more sleep (i was only half awake when i typed that) - I realise i might have.... been quite blunt/mopey in my expression to you guys. 

No, i'm not a battered housewife making excuses, I realise he said something without realising he had hurt me, as he would never intend to hurt me (this, I know is true). Anyway, i'll tell him he needs to be more vocal about loving my booty et al.


----------



## Famouslastwords

succubus_dxb said:


> After getting a bit more sleep (i was only half awake when i typed that) - I realise i might have.... been quite blunt/mopey in my expression to you guys.
> 
> No, i'm not a battered housewife making excuses, I realise he said something without realising he had hurt me, as he would never intend to hurt me (this, I know is true). Anyway, i'll tell him he needs to be more vocal about loving my booty et al.



I don't think you're a battered wife making excuses, sometimes my bf says things that make me upset too and I take them personally and I vent about them and people go wtf you should dump him and they don't know the whole story about the ways in which he's a really good guy, but I will tell you this, that sounds really hurtful and you ARE an hourglass figure, so you should tell him you open his eyes because you are an hourglass figure.


----------



## succubus_dxb

Famouslastwords said:


> I don't think you're a battered wife making excuses, sometimes my bf says things that make me upset too and I take them personally and I vent about them and people go wtf you should dump him and they don't know the whole story about the ways in which he's a really good guy, but I will tell you this, that sounds really hurtful and you ARE an hourglass figure, so you should tell him you open his eyes because you are an hourglass figure.



"You're blind and stupid, and are now taking me out for a steak dinner and dancing"? 
:eat1:


----------



## CastingPearls

We all say stupid things but it doesn't mean we're stupid. I don't think he meant to hurt you either.


----------



## OneWickedAngel

CastingPearls said:


> We all say stupid things but it doesn't mean we're stupid. I don't think he meant to hurt you either.


I agree. 



succubus_dxb said:


> "You're blind and stupid, and are now taking me out for a steak dinner and dancing"?
> :eat1:



That's my girl. Just follow this with exclamation points and a smack upside his head.


----------



## succubus_dxb

CastingPearls said:


> We all say stupid things but it doesn't mean we're stupid. I don't think he meant to hurt you either.





OneWickedAngel said:


> I agree.
> 
> 
> 
> That's my girl. Just follow this with exclamation points and a smack upside his head.





:kiss2: thanks girls x


----------



## Linda

My heart is heavy. So much sadness lately in the lives of those I care about. Two more funerals in the near future for me.


----------



## littlefairywren

Linda said:


> My heart is heavy. So much sadness lately in the lives of those I care about. Two more funerals in the near future for me.



Sending hugs ((((((((Linda))))))))


----------



## spiritangel

friends in hospital and one loosing their job in a month just so much pain and suffering for truly good people


----------



## Heyyou

Sleep evading me at the moment.


----------



## RJ20

Nobody to talk with 
I try to be nice and chat 
with some but apparently they
think I'm "too desperate" or some bs like that to them
to even be nice and WANT to talk with me. 
Wishing there was someone that understands Really understand.
and that I was'nt so alone.


----------



## SMA413

1.) My ex still makes me crazy. I hate that I still love him- especially after all the shit he's put me through.

2.) I thought I'd be ok with casually dating a guy who is also dating two other girls since I figured I'd see other guys... but it just feels really lonely and pathetic- especially because he sucks at time management and because the other guys I've seen aren't that great.


----------



## Famouslastwords

SMA413 said:


> 1.) My ex still makes me crazy. I hate that I still love him- especially after all the shit he's put me through.



Oh man, do I ever understand this one! All the time. Same ex. Over and over.


----------



## Rowan

That my stalker doesnt get it that i want nothing to do with him. He texted me again today with another mean message. I finally responded and told him that if he doesnt lose my phone number, I will start posting all his text messages and any others here to Dims as a warning to other women. 

Hopefully he'll get the hint because Id rather it not get to that point. It's like...just freaking get over it and lose my number already.


----------



## Heyyou

RJ20 said:


> Nobody to talk with
> I try to be nice and chat
> with some but apparently they
> think I'm "too desperate" or some bs like that to them
> to even be nice and WANT to talk with me.
> Wishing there was someone that understands Really understand.
> and that I was'nt so alone.



Welcome to the club, bud. We just need to work our way through it, and look on to the next one. It hurts even when you have it rationalized, but just be dismissive and say "on to the next one" and that can make the best of a bad situation. Hope this helps!

I lost one of my wrenches, i got up early and was going to use it this morning. Not w i have my nut on finger-tight, as opposed to snug.. and thats a first for me in car care.


----------



## girlish

I'm sorry to everyone that's hurting. Life just throws some unbelievable curve balls at you sometimes.

I hope peace arrives and heartache subsides for those in painful situations. 

My sadness stems from moving away from all my friends and family, losing my job, my puppy dying, and most of all painful, my miscarriage.

It's been a painful, painful time. 

However I'm optimistic... I just got married and am starting school soon. I'm rebuilding. And that honestly brings me some inner peace.


----------



## Rowan

girlish said:


> I'm sorry to everyone that's hurting. Life just throws some unbelievable curve balls at you sometimes.
> 
> I hope peace arrives and heartache subsides for those in painful situations.
> 
> My sadness stems from moving away from all my friends and family, losing my job, my puppy dying, and most of all painful, my miscarriage.
> 
> It's been a painful, painful time.
> 
> However I'm optimistic... I just got married and am starting school soon. I'm rebuilding. And that honestly brings me some inner peace.



Im sorry to hear about all your troubles  I hope things get better for you soon!


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

girlish said:


> I'm sorry to everyone that's hurting. Life just throws some unbelievable curve balls at you sometimes.
> 
> I hope peace arrives and heartache subsides for those in painful situations.
> 
> My sadness stems from moving away from all my friends and family, losing my job, my puppy dying, and most of all painful, my miscarriage.
> 
> It's been a painful, painful time.
> 
> However I'm optimistic... I just got married and am starting school soon. I'm rebuilding. And that honestly brings me some inner peace.



Oh, girlish, I'm so sorry.  I hope life brings you nothing but peace, love and happiness from here on out - seems like you've already had your share of the rest. *gentle hugs*


----------



## LivingCanvas

I can't breathe out of my nose...

Damn cold/flu like bug. =(


----------



## thekidstable

girlish said:


> I'm sorry to everyone that's hurting. Life just throws some unbelievable curve balls at you sometimes.
> 
> I hope peace arrives and heartache subsides for those in painful situations.
> 
> My sadness stems from moving away from all my friends and family, losing my job, my puppy dying, and most of all painful, my miscarriage.
> 
> It's been a painful, painful time.
> 
> However I'm optimistic... I just got married and am starting school soon. I'm rebuilding. And that honestly brings me some inner peace.



I'm sorry you had to go through all that. But it's fantastic that you are optimistic. 
There is strength in your eyes. I can tell that you will be fine.


----------



## Punkin1024

My time off from work is over tomorrow evening. I always get blue when I face the reality that I have to return to work after a nice, restful vacation.


----------



## mossystate

Ella, try your best to make tonight really great. I know what you are saying - that feeling makes a person feel oddly empty. You will probably feel better once you get back to work.......funny how that happens. OK, maybe better for an hour.


----------



## GTAFA

I am feeling sorry for myself i guess. I am not ready for a relationship, so i am more like a spectator in the stands than a real participant in the game (of life). I almost feel as if i should have a warning label attached "keep away, toxic air".


----------



## Lovelyone

I am sad that when you tell someone that you aren't interested in dating ANYONE...they take it personally and try to persuade you that THEY are right for you. Why is it not acceptable to just take some time for myself and find happiness in that?


----------



## GTAFA

Lovelyone said:


> I am sad that when you tell someone that you aren't interested in dating ANYONE...they take it personally and try to persuade you that THEY are right for you. Why is it not acceptable to just take some time for myself and find happiness in that?



I sometimes wonder... we ask people to take driving lessons, we don't let people operate cranes and heavy machinery without training & paperwork. Yet we are free to procreate, make new people, or just dance badly in full view of others. NO i am not saying we should pass laws. Haha i might be the first one locked up.

...i meant, some people come into relationships with great care, communicating with thoughtfulness, and assessing their own feelings with a sense of responsibility. Others? they get out on that relationship super-highway drunk, without checking to see if there's traffic coming at them head-on, without even caring if they wipe out everyone in the lane with their dumb-ass approach. We're all different, and some of us are more sensitive than others.

Not only do i feel leery about the superhighway (if you follow the metaphor), but i won't even go near the garage.


----------



## Still a Skye fan

I'm not particularly sad right now...just royally sick of winter is all.

I spent a few hours, earlier this afternoon, digging out my house during a snow/sleet/rain storm. I actually saw a flash of lightning and heard a rumble of thunder - yes, in freakin' FEBRUARY! Our wacky upstate NY winter weather normally makes me laugh but this year's winter seems ENDLESS...I really really really want to see grass again and feel a warm breeze. But we've still got winter for another 6 weeks or so before it starts to let up ~sigh~

I dunno, maybe I've got a touch of that Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) I hear about. I think I'll take a hot shower, have some tea, read a bit and go to bed.

Yeah, I'll be okay and I wish everyone else well with their problems.


Dennis


----------



## HottiMegan

My heart was broken today.. I have to put on a happy face until company leaves. then i can mourn.


----------



## Fluffy51888

I'm sad because there are honestly people out there who call themselves Christians who are, in reality, close-minded, judgmental hypocrites. I've always heard that there were people out there like that, but coming in contact with some of them really puts things in perspective. I would hope that as a Christian, I treat people with kindness, respect, and with an open mind. Everyone deserves love, no matter their race, religion, sexuality, or any other factor. Shoving your beliefs down someone's throat is NOT the way to minister to them. My rant is done, kthanks.


----------



## Rowan

my heart hurts. dealing...best i know how....
problem is that its by self pain rather than emotional...
yeah..im a freak..if you have a problem with it...f u too


----------



## Aust99

I'm really sad that a close friend is in danger of losing her home tonight to a bushfire.... she evacuated early this morning and some people on her street have already lost their homes... I really hope it doesn't get to that. And I hope these fires occurred naturally, it will be even more crushing if it turns out they were deliberately lit.


----------



## SMA413

My sister's self-destructive ways and the impact that they'll have on my 6mo old niece breaks my heart.


----------



## AmazingAmy

My poor dog is so ill these past few hours. We're giving her the night to see if it's just a stomach upset, but she looks so sad, it's unbearable. I wish I knew what she needed, whether it's being whispered to or just left alone... I wish she could tell me how she feels. I want to bring her into my bed but don't want to disturb her in case it hurts. My poor, sweet Lilly...


----------



## Heyyou

That FL won and i dont care.


----------



## Bigtigmom

Today is the 2 year anniversary of my children losing thier grandmother/my mother-in-law. This is what I wish I could say to her now.
~Marie,
Looking back on the way things went I see so many things that didn't have to happen. For my part in making things difficult right before the end, I am truly sorry. You knew to a certain extent what he was doing and how he was and you were at fault too as well as he. I know that being up there you get to see everything from all sides and now you know why things went the way they did. I realize that you loved me as your own daughter and saw all the good in myself that I couldn't see. I thought you were crazy, but I was immature. I was forced to grow up quickly but I amazed myself and I continue to each day. I am a very strong woman now, alot like you had to be. It's true "That which does not kill us only makes us stronger". Thank you for everything you did that I was too stupid to appreciate at the time. You are missed and thought of often. We love you!

Karen ~



**I know part of this could've been posted on a different thread but it's all relevant. Thanks.


----------



## HottiMegan

I am possibly contemplating ending my marriage and it breaks my heart. Infidelity is an asshole.


----------



## Rowan

HottiMegan said:


> I am possibly contemplating ending my marriage and it breaks my heart. Infidelity is an asshole.



Im sorry that you are having to deal with that hon *hugs*


----------



## MisticalMisty

HottiMegan said:


> I am possibly contemplating ending my marriage and it breaks my heart. Infidelity is an asshole.



Oh gosh..I am so sorry!


----------



## Your Plump Princess

HottiMegan said:


> I am possibly contemplating ending my marriage and it breaks my heart. Infidelity is an asshole.


I'm so sorry you might have to consider such a hard decision. *Hugs*


----------



## graphicsgal

One of my son's classmates lost her three-year-old brother in an accident. It is sad when one so young leaves us.


----------



## snuggletiger

graphicsgal said:


> One of my son's classmates lost her three-year-old brother in an accident. It is sad when one so young leaves us.



Thats horrible


----------



## graphicsgal

HottiMegan said:


> I am possibly contemplating ending my marriage and it breaks my heart. Infidelity is an asshole.



It really is. I am sorry you have to go through this.


----------



## Punkin1024

HottiMegan said:


> I am possibly contemplating ending my marriage and it breaks my heart. Infidelity is an asshole.



I am sad to read this. Megan, my heart goes out to you.


----------



## Punkin1024

AmazingAmy said:


> My poor dog is so ill these past few hours. We're giving her the night to see if it's just a stomach upset, but she looks so sad, it's unbearable. I wish I knew what she needed, whether it's being whispered to or just left alone... I wish she could tell me how she feels. I want to bring her into my bed but don't want to disturb her in case it hurts. My poor, sweet Lilly...



Amy ~ I hope Lilly pulled through. I know you've given her your love and she knows too.


----------



## sugar and spice

HottiMegan said:


> I am possibly contemplating ending my marriage and it breaks my heart. Infidelity is an asshole.



I'm so sorry Megan, I know how much it hurts. Love your boys and do whatever you think is best for all of you, Big Hugs.


----------



## AmazingAmy

Punkin1024 said:


> Amy ~ I hope Lilly pulled through. I know you've given her your love and she knows too.



Thank you Punkin. She was poorly for a good 12 hours following, but she was suddenly play fighting with our other dog out of nowhere, so I think she's got over it now. She's been fine since too. Sometimes I forget how much that pup milks a bad day! I think she'd just eaten something bad.


----------



## snuggletiger

yaaaaaaaaaay for playful healthy puppy


----------



## Mathias

I'm on the verge of tears at how bad today was...


----------



## CastingPearls

Some things are so painful there are no words for it.


----------



## cherylharrell

That is so terrible your hubbys infidelity. You're too nice for him to do that to. And the person whose boyfriend made the comment about them, can't they see how wonderful have a real sized woman is? Hugs to you both and everyone else on here...


----------



## Mozz

It kinda makes me sad that I'm not going to have any to love on v-day :/


----------



## RJ20

I don't have anybody to love either 
What is also getting me down is I need a way 
there NEEDS to be a way for a dude to make money
plenty of money doing something online. For girls 
it's easy you just show off and tease for guys you 
get plenty of money. But a dude like me what the hell
am I supposed to do ?? I've tried selling my cards on Ebay
but apparently nobody's into sports cards anymore. That's 
BS cause there's got to be SOMEBODY that is I have PLENTY 
to get rid of. I've looked for a legit online job-Nothing. I'd like 
to try out like Blip.TV which some are apparently doing and you 
can get money, but the problem is I don't have a camera and 
not sure what kind I would need. And I'm akward in front of the camera
so I'd have to do it the way Hellsing does it. If somebody would like to 
buy my drawings off Deviantart that would be great. It's a shame that 
my newest one has'nt gotten many views, I thought I did a good job on 
the thing and I'm trying to come up with a story for that one too. It's 
hard cause I don't have like a writing partner or anything so I have to try 
to go it alone as usual. And also I hope there's someone out there for me
I'd like to think so but I'm not sure  It would be nice if they were Close by too seeing as there's NO beautiful big girls really around here. And how would I convince them to move down here if there some place else ? Other than being cheaper to live down here. I was thinking that with this one chick, I just wish she was'nt self-centered. Anyway....sadness and random thoughts
I don't usually put everything about me out in the open like most, but sometimes I just have to vent for a minute.


----------



## CAMellie

RJ20 said:


> I don't have anybody to love either
> What is also getting me down is I need a way
> there NEEDS to be a way for a dude to make money
> plenty of money doing something online.* For girls
> it's easy you just show off and tease for guys you
> get plenty of money.* But a dude like me what the hell
> am I supposed to do ?? I've tried selling my cards on Ebay
> but apparently nobody's into sports cards anymore. That's
> BS cause there's got to be SOMEBODY that is I have PLENTY
> to get rid of. I've looked for a legit online job-Nothing. I'd like
> to try out like Blip.TV which some are apparently doing and you
> can get money, but the problem is I don't have a camera and
> not sure what kind I would need. And I'm akward in front of the camera
> so I'd have to do it the way Hellsing does it. If somebody would like to
> buy my drawings off Deviantart that would be great. It's a shame that
> my newest one has'nt gotten many views, I thought I did a good job on
> the thing and I'm trying to come up with a story for that one too. It's
> hard cause I don't have like a writing partner or anything so I have to try
> to go it alone as usual. And also I hope there's someone out there for me
> I'd like to think so but I'm not sure  It would be nice if they were Close by too seeing as there's NO beautiful big girls really around here. And how would I convince them to move down here if there some place else ? Other than being cheaper to live down here. I was thinking that with this one chick, I just wish she was'nt self-centered. Anyway....sadness and random thoughts
> I don't usually put everything about me out in the open like most, but sometimes I just have to vent for a minute.



*blink blink* uhhh-huhhh


----------



## mossystate

I tease guys all the damn time...and I am not seeing the money.








What am I doing wrong?






:eat1:


----------



## CastingPearls

RJ20 said:


> I don't have anybody to love either
> What is also getting me down is I need a way
> there NEEDS to be a way for a dude to make money
> plenty of money doing something online. For girls
> it's easy you just show off and tease for guys you
> get plenty of money. But a dude like me what the hell
> am I supposed to do ?? I've tried selling my cards on Ebay
> but apparently nobody's into sports cards anymore. That's
> BS cause there's got to be SOMEBODY that is I have PLENTY
> to get rid of. I've looked for a legit online job-Nothing. I'd like
> to try out like Blip.TV which some are apparently doing and you
> can get money, but the problem is I don't have a camera and
> not sure what kind I would need. And I'm akward in front of the camera
> so I'd have to do it the way Hellsing does it. If somebody would like to
> buy my drawings off Deviantart that would be great. It's a shame that
> my newest one has'nt gotten many views, I thought I did a good job on
> the thing and I'm trying to come up with a story for that one too. It's
> hard cause I don't have like a writing partner or anything so I have to try
> to go it alone as usual. And also I hope there's someone out there for me
> I'd like to think so but I'm not sure  It would be nice if they were Close by too seeing as there's NO beautiful big girls really around here. And how would I convince them to move down here if there some place else ? Other than being cheaper to live down here. I was thinking that with this one chick, I just wish she was'nt self-centered. Anyway....sadness and random thoughts
> I don't usually put everything about me out in the open like most, but sometimes I just have to vent for a minute.


Maybe part of the problem is you're hanging out and posting mostly on a forum where most of the women of Dims don't ordinarily go. They don't get to know you if you're invisible to them except when you're saying how much life sucks for you.

You don't post any personal info on your profile or a pic but many of the women here do and don't earn any money doing it.  

On some of your other posts you were saying that you're not into tattoos or piercings yet you want a woman to overlook that you're a nerd with no muscles. Isn't it really hypocritical to expect them to accept you as is when you don't extend the same courtesy?

Also, most of what you've been posting all night doesn't exactly lend itself to women running to see what you're all about. Whining is very unattractive.

Oh by the way...A lot of women here like nerds and don't care about muscles. That's not the problem.


----------



## spiritangel

The absolute horrific comments I am reading about an as yet to happen radio show on the fact that you can be obese and healthy the poor woman is going to get ripped to shreds if the comments on JJJ's fan page are anything to go by


----------



## Rowan

CastingPearls said:


> Maybe part of the problem is you're hanging out and posting mostly on a forum where most of the women of Dims don't ordinarily go. They don't get to know you if you're invisible to them except when you're saying how much life sucks for you.
> 
> You don't post any personal info on your profile or a pic but many of the women here do and don't earn any money doing it.
> 
> *On some of your other posts you were saying that you're not into tattoos or piercings yet you want a woman to overlook that you're a nerd with no muscles. Isn't it really hypocritical to expect them to accept you as is when you don't extend the same courtesy?*
> 
> Also, most of what you've been posting all night doesn't exactly lend itself to women running to see what you're all about. Whining is very unattractive.
> 
> Oh by the way...A lot of women here like nerds and don't care about muscles. That's not the problem.



Oh darn....guess im counted out, I have both! The shame. lol


----------



## Bigtigmom

Two years ago today I lived one of the hardest and worst days of my life. A day that showed me exactly how strong I am and brought to light some qualities I didn't l know I had. This was the day I had to say goodbye to a man who was my best friend, my first real love, the father of my children, and my husband. We miss you as we always will. We know that you are looking down and watching us in our everyday lives while we laugh, cry, learn and blossom into who we are meant to be. There are many times when I just wish I could hug you or hear you say "my girls" one more time.


----------



## Surlysomething

3 years ago today, my family lost my Aunt in a car accident.
She is terribly missed. 

RIP Auntie Michelle. We love you so much.


----------



## RJ20

CastingPearls said:


> Maybe part of the problem is you're hanging out and posting mostly on a forum where most of the women of Dims don't ordinarily go. They don't get to know you if you're invisible to them except when you're saying how much life sucks for you.
> 
> You don't post any personal info on your profile or a pic but many of the women here do and don't earn any money doing it.
> 
> On some of your other posts you were saying that you're not into tattoos or piercings yet you want a woman to overlook that you're a nerd with no muscles. Isn't it really hypocritical to expect them to accept you as is when you don't extend the same courtesy?
> 
> Also, most of what you've been posting all night doesn't exactly lend itself to women running to see what you're all about. Whining is very unattractive.
> 
> Oh by the way...A lot of women here like nerds and don't care about muscles. That's not the problem.



So wait most of the chicks don't post in this section..ok...riiight..thanks. 
I don't put all my personal stuff out there NO, BUT if I meet someone nice 
Sure. And I have posted a pic awhile back on here. I don't feel the need to show myself and I'm not a pic whore. I'm not that good looking and akward in front of the camera. And NO...SOME of the chicks post without earning a dime. And Again...NO ..you don't know what I'm talking about. If there is a chick who's into (if she is) into kind of nerdy (like me) and also not into smoking tats or any of that BS and would like to be friends that's what I meant. And what I've been posting is the TRUTH and my feelings  I'm 
NOT whining and THAT is what I f-ing HATE like girls NEVER feel this way. How bout you come back from opposite world for me. Because I'm pretty sure they do.


----------



## RJ20

mossystate said:


> I tease guys all the damn time...and I am not seeing the money.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> What am I doing wrong?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I don't know are you a young beautiful model type like some, if you are ..can't go wrong.


----------



## mossystate

I am 48 and my Mom thought I was cute.













damn


----------



## RJ20

Yeah I'm sorry.


----------



## mossystate

What are you sorry for?


----------



## RJ20

Just, you know ..I hope somebody likes you even if your not earning money for showing off like alot of these chicks do. That's all.


----------



## CastingPearls

lolz ......


----------



## Hozay J Garseeya

HAHAAHAH what?


----------



## mossystate

RJ20 said:


> Just, you know ..I hope somebody likes you even if your not earning money for showing off like alot of these chicks do. That's all.







Check out the ' crush ' thread. No man crushes on me. They only go for the chicks who ask for money...and, sometimes...baked goods.




sigh


----------



## CastingPearls

mossystate said:


> Check out the ' crush ' thread. No man crushes on me. They only go for the chicks who ask for money...and, sometimes...baked goods.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> sigh


But but bbbbbbut, I thought that meme was ded?


----------



## RJ20

CastingPearls said:


> lolz ......



What is so funny ?
You what "LOL" right back. That is soo
Overused and just like in this instance on stuff
THAT IS NOT FUNNY !


----------



## Dromond

RJ20 said:


> Just, you know ..I hope somebody likes you even if your not earning money for showing off like alot of these chicks do. That's all.



What is this I don't even


----------



## RJ20

mossystate said:


> Check out the ' crush ' thread. No man crushes on me. They only go for the chicks who ask for money...and, sometimes...baked goods.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> sigh




Ok well again I'm sorry and I would but it's not like chicks crush on me either you know .


----------



## RJ20

Dromond said:


> What is this I don't even



You don't even need to say anything.


----------



## Dromond

RJ20 said:


> What is so funny ?
> You what "LOL" right back. That is soo
> Overused and just like in this instance on stuff
> THAT IS NOT FUNNY !



What is funny is, Mossystate is teasing you and you don't get it.


----------



## mossystate

RJ20 said:


> Ok well again I'm sorry and I would but it's not like chicks crush on me either you know .






We might be the two least crushed on people at Dimensions.


Good thing I have the ability to chew my toenails. I take the small comforts when and where I can find them.


----------



## CastingPearls

RJ20 said:


> What is so funny ?
> You what "LOL" right back. That is soo
> Overused and just like in this instance on stuff
> THAT IS NOT FUNNY !


Temper tantrum much?


----------



## RJ20

CastingPearls said:


> Temper tantrum much?



Are you funny much ??


----------



## RJ20

Dromond said:


> What is funny is, Mossystate is teasing you and you don't get it.



No I don't it's stupid and INCREDIBLY UNNECCESSARY


----------



## Dromond

This threadjack is making me sad. I'm out.


----------



## cinnamitch

mossystate said:


> We might be the two least crushed on people at Dimensions.
> 
> 
> Good thing I have the ability to chew my toenails. I take the small comforts when and where I can find them.



I lub yew:kiss2:


----------



## RJ20

mossystate said:


> We might be the two least crushed on people at Dimensions.
> 
> 
> Good thing I have the ability to chew my toenails. I take the small comforts when and where I can find them.



Yeah I think we are. Although ...I don't do that :|


----------



## mossystate

Teasing?


I don't make money by being cute online.

I am not crushed on by men at Dimensions.

I can chew my toenails ( pretty much only the big toes, and even then, I have to stretch first...you would think that flexibility would be a huge draw....but...no ).

I am not young.


----------



## mossystate

cinnamitch said:


> I lub yew:kiss2:



:wubu::kiss2:



Dromond said:


> This threadjack is making me sad. I'm out.



See you on the other threadjack.


----------



## Dromond

mossystate said:


> See you on the other threadjack.



It's a date.


----------



## CleverBomb

Dromond said:


> What is this I don't even


<insert captioned image of bunny with pancake on its head>

-Rusty
(bewilderment, old school style)


----------



## nettie

HottiMegan said:


> I am possibly contemplating ending my marriage and it breaks my heart. Infidelity is an asshole.



Megan,
I've been away from the boards for a bit and just read your post. Infidelity is an ugly beast and I've battled it myself. In fact, it's what ended my marriage. If you ever want to "talk" please feel free to PM me.

From all I've read, you are a beautiful, strong woman who in spite of the pain that comes with this will persevere because that's just who you are. And your boys are all the luckier for that. All that light and sunshine you bring to others is what will eventually get you through whatever decisions you make regarding your marriage.

Just wanted to let you know I'm sending you warm, healing thoughts.

Nettie


----------



## cherylharrell

Prayers just said for all and vibes sent. Hugs to you all...


----------



## RJ20

You what IS making me Sad and this is a shame 
it REALLY is. That someone can't just put out they're 
thought without being attacked and being jumped all over
by a bunch of douches who don't KNOW or UNDERSTAND. 
I'm NOT going to explain all my stuff to you I don't and should'nt 
have to. I don't feel the need to put every little thing about me 
out there. I like remaining Anonymous


----------



## Kurvaceous_Kelsey

That I'll never be his first love.  
And that I can't listen to one of my favorite songs because I know its the song she used to sing to him.
The song that made him fall in love with her.


----------



## Angel

RJ20 said:


> You what IS making me Sad and this is a shame
> it REALLY is. That someone can't just put out they're
> thought without being attacked and being jumped all over
> by a bunch of douches who don't KNOW or UNDERSTAND.
> I'm NOT going to explain all my stuff to you I don't and should'nt
> have to. I don't feel the need to put every little thing about me
> out there. I like remaining Anonymous



*PLEASE go to bed self-proclaimed-nice-guy-who-calls-everyone-douches and stop polluting threads here.*


----------



## penguin

RJ20 said:


> You what IS making me Sad and this is a shame
> it REALLY is. That someone can't just put out they're
> thought without being attacked and being jumped all over
> by a bunch of douches who don't KNOW or UNDERSTAND.
> I'm NOT going to explain all my stuff to you I don't and should'nt
> have to. I don't feel the need to put every little thing about me
> out there. I like remaining Anonymous



If we don't know or understand what you're on about, then maybe it's because you haven't done a very good job of explaining yourself.


----------



## RJ20

Angel said:


> *PLEASE go to bed self-proclaimed-nice-guy-who-calls-everyone-douches and stop polluting threads here.*



PLEASE go away self-proclaimed nice lady I'm Not polluting anything.
Nobody asked you. So how bout you go to bed and hope there's anybody 
with tonight.  Because I AM nice I'm not "self-proclaimed" anything. 
Why would I say that if it was'nt true ?? That's what people who NEED TO MIND THEIR OWN BUSINESS Need to ask themselves. seriously.


----------



## RJ20

penguin said:


> If we don't know or understand what you're on about, then maybe it's because you haven't done a very good job of explaining yourself.



NO You don't need to I'm NOT just going to laay it all out there. 
I HAVE done a good job of explaining it and this stuff I just needed
to get out there all you not surprisingly oblivious need to mind your business
this DOSE'NT concern you AT ALL. This if you read should understand and is how I feel. And if you don't ..your good at understanding then are you ?


----------



## Hozay J Garseeya

Angel said:


> *PLEASE go to bed self-proclaimed-nice-guy-who-calls-everyone-douches and stop polluting threads here.*


QFT


penguin said:


> If we don't know or understand what you're on about, then maybe it's because you haven't done a very good job of explaining yourself.



and . . . QFT


----------



## Angel

RJ20 said:


> PLEASE go away self-proclaimed nice lady I'm Not polluting anything.
> Nobody asked you. So how bout you go to bed and hope there's anybody
> with tonight.  Because I AM nice I'm not "self-proclaimed" anything.
> Why would I say that if it was'nt true ?? That's what people who NEED TO MIND THEIR OWN BUSINESS Need to ask themselves. seriously.



I didn't say I was a nice lady. 

You, on the other hand, have posted numerous times that you are nice. You are the one proclaiming that you are nice. Hence self (meaning YOU) proclaimed.

As peanut says, neeeeeeeerrrrrr.

"... and hope there's anybody with tonight" ? Aww. Is that an invitation? :wubu: Yipee! I might have me a Valentine after all!!! :kiss2:


----------



## Blackhawk2293

One of my best friends and former mentors (who we will refer to as "D") is marrying a woman (who we will refer to as "B", draw your own conclusions about why I chose that letter) who treats him like shit and actually maneuvered him into not only spending money reshaping his body but consistently threatens to leave him if he doesn't have a 6 pack (muscles not beer) by April. B constantly embarasses and degrades him in public about the way he looks and controls the decisions D makes, forcing him to make really stupid ones and then blames him for it.

D was the man that helped me build my career, stood up for me and others on our team when the rest of the office was trying to push us all out, D made me the confident professional I am today and is one of the reasons why only a few days before his wedding I will be Graduating with a Masters Degree. We went through a lot when he was my boss and he's like an older brother to me. To the point where I accepted the job of being the Best Man for his wedding, which is due to happen in a month's time.

I'm angry that people like B are allowed to exist in the world and worse... appear to have a mandate to walk around and treat people like they do.

I have told him already about what pisses me off about B and he acknowledged it. I had to tell him because (1) he asked and (2) I didn't want my annoyance to build up to the point where I blow up at him. I've said what needs to be said and now I try to gently encourage him to stand up for himself more, to no avail most of the time.

But he still has my loyalty and so I will keep on with being the Best Man... I really don't know if there's anything else I can say or do or even if it's my place to do so.

Makes me more angry than sad but there it is.


----------



## Surlysomething

Angel said:


> I didn't say I was a nice lady.
> 
> You, on the other hand, have posted numerous times that you are nice. You are the one proclaiming that you are nice. Hence self (meaning YOU) proclaimed.
> 
> As peanut says, neeeeeeeerrrrrr.
> 
> "... and hope there's anybody with tonight" ? Aww. Is that an invitation? :wubu: Yipee! I might have me a Valentine after all!!! :kiss2:


 

Why do you keep talking to him if you want him to go away?


----------



## Bigtigmom

cherylharrell said:


> Prayers just said for all and vibes sent. Hugs to you all...



Thanks Cheryl, I appreciate that.


----------



## penguin

RJ20 said:


> NO You don't need to I'm NOT just going to laay it all out there.
> I HAVE done a good job of explaining it



Except not.



RJ20 said:


> and this stuff I just needed
> to get out there all you not surprisingly oblivious need to mind your business
> this DOSE'NT concern you AT ALL.



If you post it on a public forum, it's fair game. If you don't want everyone chiming in, keep it private.



RJ20 said:


> This if you read should understand and is how I feel. And if you don't ..your good at understanding then are you ?



I understand that you're having a tantrum because you're not getting the sympathy that you want. Women aren't going to rush over to you to console you and convince you that you're a nice guy if you act like an ass and call them names. I also understand that you seem to think other people owe you - their time, their attention, their sympathy. But they don't.


----------



## Lovelyone

I was thinking about my mom today and how much I miss her, that makes me sad. This lead me to thinking about my dad and how much I miss him...that made me sad.
This thread and several others are making me sad. 
I've got a sinus headache, that's making me sad.
My laundry needs to be done and I don't want to do it...that's making me sad.
I am too lazy to go get something for lunch, that's making me sad.
I lost the usb cable to my printer and that made me sad until my friend got me a new one.
A movie on Lifetime made me sad.
Scrap-booking sometimes makes me sad cos of looking at old pics and realizing that those days are gone and never will be again.

I am going to have some chocolate and that will make everything better.


----------



## RJ20

penguin said:


> Except not.
> 
> 
> 
> If you post it on a public forum, it's fair game. If you don't want everyone chiming in, keep it private.
> 
> 
> 
> I understand that you're having a tantrum because you're not getting the sympathy that you want. Women aren't going to rush over to you to console you and convince you that you're a nice guy if you act like an ass and call them names. I also understand that you seem to think other people owe you - their time, their attention, their sympathy. But they don't.



Well then keep it private for me. I'm not having a tantrum ...you make it sound like I'm a child. It's not like anybody's rushing to you either...I mean what do you want me to do ? And I never said they owe me anything. But someone who understands would be nice.


----------



## Aust99

RJ20 said:


> So wait most of the chicks don't post in this section..ok...riiight..thanks.
> I don't put all my personal stuff out there NO, BUT if I meet someone nice
> Sure. And I have posted a pic awhile back on here. I don't feel the need to show myself and I'm not a pic whore. I'm not that good looking and akward in front of the camera. And NO...SOME of the chicks post without earning a dime. And Again...NO ..you don't know what I'm talking about. If there is a chick who's into (if she is) into kind of nerdy (like me) and also not into smoking tats or any of that BS and would like to be friends that's what I meant. And what I've been posting is the TRUTH and my feelings  I'm
> NOT whining and THAT is what I f-ing HATE like girls NEVER feel this way. How bout you come back from opposite world for me. Because I'm pretty sure they do.





RJ20 said:


> You what IS making me Sad and this is a shame
> it REALLY is. That someone can't just put out they're
> thought without being attacked and being jumped all over
> by a bunch of douches who don't KNOW or UNDERSTAND.
> I'm NOT going to explain all my stuff to you I don't and should'nt
> have to. I don't feel the need to put every little thing about me
> out there. I like remaining Anonymous





RJ20 said:


> Well then keep it private for me. I'm not having a tantrum ...you make it sound like I'm a child. It's not like anybody's rushing to you either...I mean what do you want me to do ? And I never said they owe me anything. But someone who understands would be nice.



OMG... you sound like such a brat in these posts. What Castingpearls said is exactly what I said to you last week... and look what you did.. you yelled at her in a post the same way you did to me..... Notice a theme here?? RELAX... click the red box in the top right corner if you don't like what people are saying... remember, it's just the Internet.


----------



## riplee

I'm sad that we all can't just get along.


----------



## sirGordy

riplee said:


> I'm sad that we all can't just get along.



Amen to that thought, and totally agree.


----------



## RJ20

Aust99 said:


> OMG... you sound like such a brat in these posts. What Castingpearls said is exactly what I said to you last week... and look what you did.. you yelled at her in a post the same way you did to me..... Notice a theme here?? RELAX... click the red box in the top right corner if you don't like what people are saying... remember, it's just the Internet.



Thanks I'll keep that in mind about the red box. And do you notice a theme ?
People not helping, belting me left and right. And I apologized to you and I'm sorry to that person.


----------



## Mathias

RJ20 said:


> Thanks I'll keep that in mind about the red box. And do you notice a theme ?
> People not helping, belting me left and right. And I apologized to you and I'm sorry to that person.



People are helping you. You just don't like the tough words they have to say so all you've done is throw temper tantrums here and in the other thread. Take a long hard look at you before you criticize others.


----------



## Rowan

Damn...have to spread the rep around before giving it to Mathias again...poo


----------



## CAMellie

Rowan said:


> Damn...have to spread the rep around before giving it to Mathias again...poo



Got him!


----------



## HeavyDuty24

fake like people.


----------



## CastingPearls

Everything ...............


----------



## littlefairywren

CastingPearls said:


> Everything ...............



Big soft cuddly hugs, Lainey.


----------



## HottiMegan

I want to thank you all for your hugs and support. I am going to try and keep my marriage going and give him a chance to prove himself to me. He says that he never followed through on the emails i found. I am going to get us into counseling. In the meantime, i am going to try and get into school this fall to start my way to gaining some independence. I loved going to school and learning new things. I've got a semester of classes to take and then hopefully I'll get into a nursing program. I want to start having a bit of a life outside of the wife and mom role. I have like no friends or family around and want to change that. My oldest boy was getting scared that his dad has been on the couch. So i really want to try work on it for the boys. 
I've been really sick (i suspect bronchitis) and have spent a lot of time just trying to get better. I've spent little time on the computer the last two weeks because of it.


----------



## Surlysomething

HottiMegan said:


> I want to thank you all for your hugs and support. I am going to try and keep my marriage going and give him a chance to prove himself to me. He says that he never followed through on the emails i found. I am going to get us into counseling. In the meantime, i am going to try and get into school this fall to start my way to gaining some independence. I loved going to school and learning new things. I've got a semester of classes to take and then hopefully I'll get into a nursing program. I want to start having a bit of a life outside of the wife and mom role. I have like no friends or family around and want to change that. My oldest boy was getting scared that his dad has been on the couch. So i really want to try work on it for the boys.
> I've been really sick (i suspect bronchitis) and have spent a lot of time just trying to get better. I've spent little time on the computer the last two weeks because of it.


 

Do what's best for you! School sounds like a great idea.


----------



## mossystate

A deep sadness that I can't change something so horrible happening to a sweet, sweet person. I don't normally ask for a lot when it comes to me, but for people like her?...it just crushes my heart.


----------



## snuggletiger

@HottiMegan
Congrats for working things out and counseling. and YAAAAAY for college and learning new stuff.


----------



## Deacone

my irritating cough with this godforsaken cold. FML.


----------



## Surlysomething

Having something that you wanted so badly to work out and help...crash down in one gigantic swoop.


----------



## Mishty

I was typing an entry for What's Making You Happy, while I chatted with a guy, I was gushing about honesty and conversing with a nice Man, and then mid conversation, he's trying to work it out with Baby Mama, I'm gonna listen to his problems of course, and be a friend. But damn, it made me sad. I gotta stop getting excited over nothin'. :doh:


----------



## penguin

Everything. Stupid hormones and lack of sleep


----------



## Admiral_Snackbar

I can't use my CPAP for a week after my sinus surgery. I've been getting rest at night, but I'm obviously not hitting enough REM to really "rest," hence I'm hitting a tiredness wall that I can't get out of, nodding off at my desk, and in general just wanting to rest.

I see the doc tomorrow, but right now I just want to say damn the torpedoes, go home, strap on my Vader breathing apparatus and nod off to Neverland.


----------



## JoyJoy

This:

http://www.arkansasonline.com/news/2011/feb/21/conway-mother-21-found-dead-police-suspect-huffing/



> Nicholas Andrews told officers that his wife had been "huffing air duster" before he went to bed, according to Conway police.
> 
> A news release said officers found an empty air duster canister next to the couch where they found Kimberly Andrews. A total of 28 air duster cans were found in a search of the residence, according to Conway Police Det. Tommy Balentine. Officers also discovered empty bottles of prescription drugs.
> 
> The couple's 2-year-old child, who was in the apartment at the time of the call, is now with relatives.



...because of the sheer stupidity of huffing and drug abuse, a 2 yr old has no mother. I know this happens all the time, but it hits close to home for me because of the experience of comforting a friend who lost her son to huffing canned air. 

It's not a "safe high" because it's "just air", people.


----------



## CAMellie

I think I completely missed the point in a question posted in my Composition II class and posted the entirely wrong answer. *sigh*


----------



## GTAFA

(posting the same thing to both the "what are you HAPPY about" thread, AND the "what are you SAD about" thread)

Closed my POF account. Wish i could confidently say it's a positive thing, but it feels like i am taking my football and running home, away from the other kids who don't want to play with me anyway.

I really don't know if it's positive or not. It's the funniest thing. I do know i will save a lot of time because i won't keep reading profiles and sending pointless messages.


----------



## SuperMishe

Being single... sigh...


----------



## Aust99

Mother Nature!!!! Tornado and cyclone in my state, Earthquake killing 65+ in New Zealand....


----------



## Your Plump Princess

Watching the news----- from the Chaos in Libya to the Earthquake in New Zealand.. It's just.. horrible, really. So much unnecessary death..


----------



## snuggletiger

The quake in Queensland


----------



## Admiral_Snackbar

snuggletiger said:


> The quake in Queensland



Christchurch almighty, when will it end?


----------



## Mishty

Someone from my hometown posted this on their facebook, and the only comment that was made was "gross". He and I used to do volunteer work together, and he's into equal rights and fighting for the underdog, I'm close to saying something, but I really don't want to fight, I just can't do it right now. I'm a coward, and that makes _me_ sad. 

View attachment 183254_10150405159845251_769915250_17217479_2062250_n.jpg


----------



## snuggletiger

Admiral_Snackbar said:


> Christchurch almighty, when will it end?



My bad I really did mean Christchurch, and honestly don't know why I typed in Queensland or what made me think of Queensland. My apologies to Australia and New Zealand for my geographical faux pas.


----------



## Gingembre

The realisation that once again I am way more into someone than they are into me. I always start out so optimistic...so hopeful...and then it dawns that it's me making all the effort....always me phoning/texting, always me going there to meet up, never him coming here. I just feel like I'm never going to find someone who actually wants to make an effort for me. I don't want great romantic gestures, I just want 50:50. Or even 60:40. Why does that seem to be so unattainable?


----------



## singingNerd79

PMs that go unanswered


----------



## CAMellie

My bestest friend of 15 years - Mala Jean Lawson - lost her battle with non small cell lung cancer yesterday. She fell asleep in the late afternoon...and had passed away when her husband went in to wake her up for her medications.
She was the most thoughtful, funny, brave, caring, intelligent individual I have ever had the pleasure of knowing.


FUCK CANCER!!!!!!!!!!


----------



## Mathias

CAMellie said:


> My bestest friend of 15 years - Mala Jean Lawson - lost her battle with non small cell lung cancer yesterday. She fell asleep in the late afternoon...and had passed away when her husband went in to wake her up for her medications.
> She was the most thoughtful, funny, brave, caring, intelligent individual I have ever had the pleasure of knowing.
> 
> 
> FUCK CANCER!!!!!!!!!!



I'm so sorry for your loss Mellie.


----------



## Punkin1024

The weather. The wind has been blowing at around 35mph all afternoon long with gusts up to 50mph! Most people get blue without days of sunshine, I get blue when it is sunny, windy, dusty. I'm best when a gentle, warm rain is falling.


----------



## rg770Ibanez

singingNerd79 said:


> PMs that go unanswered



Dude I am right there with you, I HATE it when people ignore me! lol

As for my current post:

Inception lost


----------



## The Orange Mage

All the crazy weather, random bouts of illness, sudden car problems, and who knows what else that keep plans from working these past few months. *sigh*


----------



## HeavyDuty24

singingNerd79 said:


> PMs that go unanswered



amen to that brotah.lol hate it when that happens,we have all been there man.lol


as for me,people that just don't get it when they should.


----------



## CuppyCakeSSBBW

HeavyDuty24 said:


> amen to that brotah.lol hate it when that happens,we have all been there man.lol
> 
> 
> as for me,people that just don't get it when they should.




There are two people in this world that seem to want to assume the worst of me at all times. They have no fact or reason for doing so, and it's sad to be judged poorly for no reason. I'm also sad for the people in question, as that sort of behaviour must make them very lonely.


----------



## HeavyDuty24

CuppyCakeSSBBW said:


> There are two people in this world that seem to want to assume the worst of me at all times. They have no fact or reason for doing so, and it's sad to be judged poorly for no reason. I'm also sad for the people in question, as that sort of behaviour must make them very lonely.




i completely agree with you,i hate it when people assume the worst things.i admit i assume at times but i feel i have good reason when i do.but it sucks when people assume without nothing to go on at all.  atleast when i assume i feel i have valid reasons to think those thoughts,but when people assume blindly with nothing to go by to assume things,that does indeed suck.i have made assumptions before in the past,but i felt i had good reason though,some were wrong,some were right.i do think everyone assumes at some point in there lives,some more then others.but i see what you mean to a tee though,and great post Cuppy.


----------



## snuggletiger

waiting for the dreaded estimate on the car.


----------



## sugar and spice

CAMellie said:


> My bestest friend of 15 years - Mala Jean Lawson - lost her battle with non small cell lung cancer yesterday. She fell asleep in the late afternoon...and had passed away when her husband went in to wake her up for her medications.
> She was the most thoughtful, funny, brave, caring, intelligent individual I have ever had the pleasure of knowing.
> 
> 
> FUCK CANCER!!!!!!!!!!



I'm so sorry Mellie, I HATE cancer too!!! I lost my brother last month to liver cancer and I miss him so much. It feels like there is no justice in the world when good people die so young, hugs to you- Fran


----------



## CAMellie

Mathias said:


> I'm so sorry for your loss Mellie.


Thank you, Matt 


sugar and spice said:


> I'm so sorry Mellie, I HATE cancer too!!! I lost my brother last month to liver cancer and I miss him so much. It feels like there is no justice in the world when good people die so young, hugs to you- Fran


Mala is the 3rd important person in my life that I've lost to cancer. I lost my husband to colo-rectal cancer (he was only 37) in 2002 and my uncle to the exact same cancer that killed my best friend - non small cell lung cancer - just last year.
I'm very sorry for the loss of your brother, sugar.


----------



## Piink

CAMellie - Sorry for your loss.

I'm sad because my Mom is in the hospital again. She has given up on life since my brother passed away this past September. She has had 3 heart attacks in less than three months, is extremly depressed, won't eat and has lost over 30 lbs. in just a few weeks. I also believe she has had a stroke as well. Things aren't looking to spectacular for her. But, I am keeping my fingers crossed that things will start looking better soon.


----------



## wannabeafatguy

The rising price of gas,being single, the economy


----------



## luscious_lulu

CuppyCakeSSBBW said:


> There are two people in this world that seem to want to assume the worst of me at all times. They have no fact or reason for doing so, and it's sad to be judged poorly for no reason. I'm also sad for the people in question, as that sort of behaviour must make them very lonely.



(((hugs))) cuppy, you are a sweet & lovely woman. Don't let those people get to you. Anyone who knows you would never say those things. 

I really want to bitch slap them for upsetting you.


----------



## fluffyandcute

snuggletiger said:


> Friend of mine getting treated for MS. Nice lady doesn't deserve it.



MS is no fun. I have to deal with it on a daily basis. Hope things go well for your friend!


----------



## fluffyandcute

I am sad right now because I am really missing my Granny. I lost her on February 5th. Things just won't be the same without her around. 
Mood: Depressed


----------



## wannabeafatguy

fluffyandcute said:


> I am sad right now because I am really missing my Granny. I lost her on February 5th. Things just won't be the same without her around.
> Mood: Depressed



My sincere condolences on the loss of your Grandmother, I lost mine on Valentines day 2000


----------



## fluffyandcute

wannabeafatguy said:


> My sincere condolences on the loss of your Grandmother, I lost mine on Valentines day 2000



Thank you very much! Something special about those grandmothers


----------



## penguin

I guess it's being fuelled by hormones and lack of sleep, but I'm sad about a decision I may have to make. I don't know that I need to make it, but it's probable, and that makes me sad. I don't want to do it


----------



## HeavyDuty24

penguin said:


> I guess it's being fuelled by hormones and lack of sleep, but I'm sad about a decision I may have to make. I don't know that I need to make it, but it's probable, and that makes me sad. I don't want to do it




*hugs* sorry about that penguin,always go with your heart.


----------



## fluffyandcute

Sad that I didn't sleep well last night  blah


----------



## CAMellie

I'm sad that some moron hit, and killed, a kitty last night...and the asshole who did it took off and left it in the middle of the road. I called animal control but they still haven't come to get the body.


----------



## Webmaster

Sad that the Kings are probably going to leave, a tragedy that can be traced back directly to the great robbery of 2002.


----------



## penguin

HeavyDuty24 said:


> *hugs* sorry about that penguin,always go with your heart.



Thanks  My head is telling my heart to stop being stupid, but I really want to go with what my heart wants! It's not easy.


----------



## Punkin1024

I'm sad because my computer internet connection is all messed up again. I couldn't even enjoy my games on Facebook because it was as slow as dialup! Sigh! Even posting in here is a test in patience.


----------



## Aust99

I'm sad..... I'm feeling ignored by a few of my friends....


----------



## HeavyDuty24

penguin said:


> Thanks  My head is telling my heart to stop being stupid, but I really want to go with what my heart wants! It's not easy.




i agree it is indeed hard.it is much easier to go with your mind but harder to go with your heart.alot of the time the easy way isn't always the best way,the hard way is difficult,but often times for the best.


----------



## AmazingAmy

I can't begin to explain all the things that are making me sad right now. It's 4am and I'm pacing my room with my hand clamped over my mouth so I can't cry as loud as my body wants to, I want to _howl_. I just don't know how to tell my family that swallowing supplements from Holland & Barratt and going to sleep at a 'normal' time won't change all the things that are destroying me right now. Taking zinc and gulping down primrose capsules won't fucking 'help'. I can't pretend to be sweet and superficial anymore because it makes the people that know me feel more comfortable. But I can't even begin to turn round and say it because it would just freak everyone the fuck out and ask where 'this is all coming from', because they're so used to a few passive aggressive Facebook statuses and a couple of late nights on the computer. Those are manageable. You can tut at those and dismiss them and not have to worry. But having me actually cry in front of you is just completely beyond anybodys control because it isn't 'like me'. I regret so bitterly not just saying how I started to feel when I was 14, a feeling that hasn't left since and makes thinking about my own fucking funeral a relaxing exercise - but that's the exact point where everyone loses interest, isnt it? That type of thing just can't be taken seriously because its Amy. Because there's never been any 'indication' before.

Well I don't have the strength or the state of mind to make people feel comfortable anymore. I'm going to a doctor, and no amount of 'advice' about green vegetables and iron tablets is going to stop me this time.


----------



## luscious_lulu

(((hugs))) Taking that first step is hard, but so worth it. You are worth it. 



AmazingAmy said:


> I can't begin to explain all the things that are making me sad right now. It's 4am and I'm pacing my room with my hand clamped over my mouth so I can't cry as loud as my body wants to, I want to _howl_. I just don't know how to tell my family that swallowing supplements from Holland & Barratt and going to sleep at a 'normal' time won't change all the things that are destroying me right now. Taking zinc and gulping down primrose capsules won't fucking 'help'. I can't pretend to be sweet and superficial anymore because it makes the people that know me feel more comfortable. But I can't even begin to turn round and say it because it would just freak everyone the fuck out and ask where 'this is all coming from', because they're so used to a few passive aggressive Facebook statuses and a couple of late nights on the computer. Those are manageable. You can tut at those and dismiss them and not have to worry. But having me actually cry in front of you is just completely beyond anybodys control because it isn't 'like me'. I regret so bitterly not just saying how I started to feel when I was 14, a feeling that hasn't left since and makes thinking about my own fucking funeral a relaxing exercise - but that's the exact point where everyone loses interest, isnt it? That type of thing just can't be taken seriously because its Amy. Because there's never been any 'indication' before.
> 
> Well I don't have the strength or the state of mind to make people feel comfortable anymore. I'm going to a doctor, and no amount of 'advice' about green vegetables and iron tablets is going to stop me this time.


----------



## CAMellie

Adrian and I went shopping for gifts for my niece's baby shower this weekend...and it hurt. It hurt knowing I can never have another baby. I want a baby with Adrian so badly that it hurts my heart...but it will never happen.


----------



## penguin

AmazingAmy said:


> Well I don't have the strength or the state of mind to make people feel comfortable anymore. I'm going to a doctor, and no amount of 'advice' about green vegetables and iron tablets is going to stop me this time.



This sounds like the best thing to do. You have to do what's right for you, not them. I hope the doctor will be able to help you.


----------



## AmazingAmy

luscious_lulu said:


> (((hugs))) Taking that first step is hard, but so worth it. You are worth it.





penguin said:


> This sounds like the best thing to do. You have to do what's right for you, not them. I hope the doctor will be able to help you.



Thanks guys, I feel much lighter today.  And thank you Em, Andrew, lovelylady and littlefairywren too - it really helps when people holler back.  I forgot how good it can be just to say it sometimes.


----------



## Admiral_Snackbar

Something was making me sad, but some other people here seem to be having a much worse series of sad events, so I'm going to use my fine command of the language and say nothing except to quote Camus: "Happiness, too, is inevitable".


----------



## Scorsese86

AmazingAmy said:


> I can't begin to explain all the things that are making me sad right now. It's 4am and I'm pacing my room with my hand clamped over my mouth so I can't cry as loud as my body wants to, I want to _howl_. I just don't know how to tell my family that swallowing supplements from Holland & Barratt and going to sleep at a 'normal' time won't change all the things that are destroying me right now. Taking zinc and gulping down primrose capsules won't fucking 'help'. I can't pretend to be sweet and superficial anymore because it makes the people that know me feel more comfortable. But I can't even begin to turn round and say it because it would just freak everyone the fuck out and ask where 'this is all coming from', because they're so used to a few passive aggressive Facebook statuses and a couple of late nights on the computer. Those are manageable. You can tut at those and dismiss them and not have to worry. But having me actually cry in front of you is just completely beyond anybodys control because it isn't 'like me'. I regret so bitterly not just saying how I started to feel when I was 14, a feeling that hasn't left since and makes thinking about my own fucking funeral a relaxing exercise - but that's the exact point where everyone loses interest, isnt it? That type of thing just can't be taken seriously because its Amy. Because there's never been any 'indication' before.
> 
> Well I don't have the strength or the state of mind to make people feel comfortable anymore. I'm going to a doctor, and no amount of 'advice' about green vegetables and iron tablets is going to stop me this time.



Hugs, Amy!

The most important thing is to talk about it, and a situation like this will only reveal who is your real friends and who actually cares. Believe me, I know all about that. Get someone to talk to, and get it out there. You shouldn't keep it inside any longer. The longer it stays inside, the worse it gets. Again, I am talking from my own experience. It might not be the same situation, but it seems you need to do something because its gone too long, and it shouldn't.


----------



## Surlysomething

I really don't want to be here.

It's not a 'fit'. It's a bandaid.



I almost walked out this morning. Because there was NO COFFEE. It's truly the only thing I look forward to every day at this place.


----------



## Tracyarts

I had to deactivate my smart phone yesterday and go back to my old phone and the basic call and text package in order to be able to pay for a new monthly healthcare expense. Could be worse, but still a bummer.

Tracy


----------



## Mathias

That feeling of disappointment I get whenever I finish a book or television series for the first time that I had previously become obsessed with. It's almost like I feel something is missing now that it's over. I'm left with a big feeling of "Now what?"


----------



## HottiMegan

Mathias said:


> That feeling of disappointment I get whenever I finish a book or television series for the first time that I had previously become obsessed with. It's almost like I feel something is missing now that it's over. I'm left with a big feeling of "Now what?"



I totally get that too! I race through many episodes in instant Netflix. When the episodes are done, i feel a little empty..


----------



## penguin

Mathias said:


> That feeling of disappointment I get whenever I finish a book or television series for the first time that I had previously become obsessed with. It's almost like I feel something is missing now that it's over. I'm left with a big feeling of "Now what?"



That's why I say the only thing worse than a bad book is a really good book, because you're going to rush through it and finish it faster than you expected, and be sad when it's done.

I like marathoning shows I haven't watched before, so I can work my way through the series quickly. But then you get to the end and it's just...over!


----------



## penguin

Looking at shoes is incredibly depressing. I have big, wide feet, and shoes that are made in my size are incredibly expensive. I miss having girly shoes


----------



## Linda

Mathias said:


> That feeling of disappointment I get whenever I finish a book or television series for the first time that I had previously become obsessed with. It's almost like I feel something is missing now that it's over. I'm left with a big feeling of "Now what?"



I get this feeling when reading a good book or series also.Sometimes, if I don't have anything lined up I'll just start over and read it again.


----------



## Rowan

*sigh* hormones...and having no one to take them out on *pout*


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

penguin said:


> Looking at shoes is incredibly depressing. I have big, wide feet, and shoes that are made in my size are incredibly expensive. I miss having girly shoes



Me too, honey. I can SO empathize with that.


----------



## littlefairywren

Why is it so hard to tell me the truth? I *hate* being lied to


----------



## Mathias

My grandma had a slight stroke this afternoon and I had to dial 911. She's stabilized now, but that was one of the most terrifying things I've ever been through. I'm still pretty shaken up over it. Is this normal?


----------



## luscious_lulu

Mathias said:


> My grandma had a slight stroke this afternoon and I had to dial 911. She's stabilized now, but that was one of the most terrifying things I've ever been through. I'm still pretty shaken up over it. Is this normal?



(((hugs))) yes, it's normal to be shaken up by someone you love being in distress. Take care. Xoxo


----------



## WVMountainrear

Mathias said:


> My grandma had a slight stroke this afternoon and I had to dial 911. She's stabilized now, but that was one of the most terrifying things I've ever been through. I'm still pretty shaken up over it. Is this normal?



I'm sorry, Matt, but it's good to hear she's stabilized now. And Pat's right, it's perfectly normal for you to be shaken. Hang in there.


----------



## littlefairywren

Mathias said:


> My grandma had a slight stroke this afternoon and I had to dial 911. She's stabilized now, but that was one of the most terrifying things I've ever been through. I'm still pretty shaken up over it. Is this normal?



Big hugs, Matt. Sending lots of healing vibes to your grandma.


----------



## DesignAddict

That the weekend went by so quickly...


----------



## Aust99

Mathias said:


> My grandma had a slight stroke this afternoon and I had to dial 911. She's stabilized now, but that was one of the most terrifying things I've ever been through. I'm still pretty shaken up over it. Is this normal?



I'm glad you were there to call...


It's very normal to still be shaken.... you will be for days...... Hope she get's well soon.


----------



## CAMellie

My stomach has been hurting non-stop for about a week now. My stomach pain used to be intermittent and easily controlled with Prilosec. Not anymore. A lot of people in my family have ulcers. I'm sad, and worried, that I may have one.


----------



## BBW4Chattery

Think I just ended it with the boy I love. Unspeakable sadness even though it was my decision. I'm dead tired, wide awake, crushed. Sucks. Not sure what to do. No friends awake to talk. Sad.


----------



## littlefairywren

BBW4Chattery said:


> Think I just ended it with the boy I love. Unspeakable sadness even though it was my decision. I'm dead tired, wide awake, crushed. Sucks. Not sure what to do. No friends awake to talk. Sad.



Lots of soothing hugs, BBW4Chattery. I hope your pain eases soon.


----------



## penguin

Having to wait up for the after hours doctor. I was told they'd be here in 2-3 hours, which means hopefully before 1am. I think my daughter has tonsillitis and I'd rather wait up for the doctor now so I can get a prescription and go out first thing to get medicine for her, than try to get an appointment sometime tomorrow.

I hate it when she's sick like this


----------



## Admiral_Snackbar

Lots of people at my company leaving for other jobs. Most were in the works in the last couple months when things were questionable, but you hate to see good people (and friends) go on to other jobs, despite the fact you want them to keep moving forward to succeed.


----------



## fluffyandcute

The fact that it is raining and COLD!!!


----------



## Linda

This weather....it's postponing a reunion. Bah!


----------



## penguin

I'm really tired due to my daughter being sick (and being up a lot last night because of it) and I'm PMSing so I'm hormonal, and this makes me sad, tired and lonely. Boo.


----------



## Admiral_Snackbar

Hates having to explain to friends and relatives when his company gets bad press.


----------



## Saoirse

my friend from Illinois made plans to roadtrip to me and spend a few days with me. i was so excited! been counting down the days since January.

He cancelled it 2 days ago. a WEEK away.

wtf.


----------



## tuffghost

Winter is making me sad right now. Mostly it's the false hope that spring is nearing and suddenly we get a huge dumping of snow. The lack of sunshine doesn't help either.


----------



## Punkin1024

Watching the devastation from the earthquake in Japan, the terrible flooding in our own country, and hurting for all the people that have been affected by the devastation.


----------



## penguin

I'm all kinds of stressed out lately, thanks to shit my ex pulled when he was down visiting my daughter, our upcoming family court appearance, trying to figure out what to do about how I feel about my booty call, plus other shit. Lack of sleep due to my daughter being sick this week hasn't helped, nor has hormones. I'm feeling a bit better today, but I still want to curl up in bed and sleep for about three days.


----------



## 1love_emily

I'm tired of not being worth anything to anyone anymore. My friends don't acknowledge me, my parents don't support me, and I'm apparently too "unattractive" to even consider being taken to prom. 

I've been rejected by 4 of the 5 guys I've asked. The one who said yes lives in Denver, whilst I'm in Omaha....

I can't wait to go to college.

And I'm thinking about losing weight.


----------



## 1love_emily

And now my prom date bailed on me.

FUCK.


----------



## snuggletiger

working on the car.


----------



## HottiMegan

I'm sad that my family doesn't understand why I'm so anxious about the state the apartment is in before my mom comes. All the dishes are washed, the toys and clothes are all put away but it's not good enough. If i could dump half our stuff in the garbage or a charity bin, I'd feel better. I can't get over this anxiety about our home not being good enough for my mom's visit. I'm thinking of renting a carpet cleaner and doing that on Tuesday.


----------



## bmann0413

1love_emily said:


> And now my prom date bailed on me.
> 
> FUCK.



At the last minute? Yeah, I know how that feels ALL too well. Hopefully, not to go with someone they JUST met the night before.


----------



## WVMountainrear

I have no idea what I want anymore. 

I used to have some semblance of a plan when it comes to my social/romantic life, and now I'm more confused than I have ever been. I never thought it was supposed to be this hard?? Is it a sign that none of my current options are right or that any of them could be if given a chance?? 

I have no idea what I want anymore.


----------



## mimosa

I wanted to send everyone here a little bit of love and light. Especially those in Japan. 

I am also feeling very sad. :really sad::really sad:God knows why. Please say a prayer for me. 

Warm sad hugs, 

Mimi


----------



## snuggletiger

lovelylady78 said:


> I have no idea what I want anymore.
> 
> I used to have some semblance of a plan when it comes to my social/romantic life, and now I'm more confused than I have ever been. I never thought it was supposed to be this hard?? Is it a sign that none of my current options are right or that any of them could be if given a chance??
> 
> I have no idea what I want anymore.



Wish I could rep ya for that because I go through the same thing. Sometimes I think I get the Artie Shaw Syndrome and end up feeling like the "right" one doesn't exist so why settle for disappointment.


----------



## WVMountainrear

snuggletiger said:


> Wish I could rep ya for that because I go through the same thing. Sometimes I think I get the Artie Shaw Syndrome and end up feeling like the "right" one doesn't exist so why settle for disappointment.



It's not that there's anything "wrong" with any of the men I've dated...well...that may be a little generous for some of them  ...but, in all seriousness, it's just never worked out for one reason or another. I've dated some wonderful men. I just don't know why none of them feel completely right _for me_. I don't think I have outlandish needs or desires, and I don't ask anything of anyone I'm not willing to supply myself. But love is not a list of "things." It's not a list of characteristics you write down and the first person who meets them all is your soulmate. It's not objective. It would be so much easier if it was. And in the instances where it _has_ felt right for me, it hasn't felt right for him. One man I was in love with I believe also came to be in love with me, but it never happened at the same time...

So if there is something to be said for "lucky in love," I sure wish I was.  I'll stay optimistic because I don't think I'm capable of being someone who can lose hope in such matters (I tend toward the "hopeless romantic" side of things), but it would be nice for something to work out for a change is all.


----------



## Mathias

Everything. All the destruction in Japan, the unrest in Libya and Wisconsin. I'm not sure what else I can say to describe all of the sadness in the world today. It's just horrible. :really sad:


----------



## Shosh

mimosa said:


> I wanted to send everyone here a little bit of love and light. Especially those in Japan.
> 
> I am also feeling very sad. :really sad::really sad:God knows why. Please say a prayer for me.
> 
> Warm sad hugs,
> 
> Mimi



Mimi I hope you are ok. Your facebook page has disappeared.
Please let me know you are ok. I am worried.

I love you.


----------



## AlethaBBW

mimosa said:


> I wanted to send everyone here a little bit of love and light. Especially those in Japan.
> 
> I am also feeling very sad. :really sad::really sad:God knows why. Please say a prayer for me.
> 
> Warm sad hugs,
> 
> Mimi



I'm sad that you're sad. Please don't disappear.


----------



## Zandoz

Right now, the inability to sleep....again.


----------



## sweetheart5950

Sad cause I am confused by the girl I really like and it seems that sometimes that there is no time for me, maybe doesn't want me. Just so damn confused it is stressing me out. The first girl in my life that has ever made me happy is starting to make me second guess things with all the mixed signals. Don't know what to do anymore. At the end of my rope. About to give up on love all together.


----------



## CAMellie

I'm sad because my 75 year old former mother-in-law (with whom we live) fell in the rain last night and was calling for help. We didn't hear her. She broke both bones in her lower right arm.


----------



## 1love_emily

bmann0413 said:


> At the last minute? Yeah, I know how that feels ALL too well. Hopefully, not to go with someone they JUST met the night before.



Not quite at the last minute, considering prom isn't till may 7th 

Unfortunately, he was one of the only guys I wanted to go with. The only others are either a) in a relationship with a skinny dance-y bizzznitch b) live 300 miles away or c) are incredibly awkward and shy and barely even speak outside of a one-on-one conversation

It's his prom too, so I guess I'll be happy for him that he has a group to go with. But I'm bummed that I can't go with who I want to go with.

I'm thinking instead I'm going to take the weekend off and go for an interview/audition and weekend away in Denver, CO


----------



## Punkin1024

CAMellie said:


> I'm sad because my 75 year old former mother-in-law (with whom we live) fell in the rain last night and was calling for help. We didn't hear her. She broke both bones in her lower right arm.



This would make me sad too. I hope she is doing better. "hugs"


----------



## CAMellie

Punkin1024 said:


> This would make me sad too. I hope she is doing better. "hugs"



Well, she still nags at us a lot...so I think she'll be just fine.  Thanks!




P.S. But if she doesn't stop being stubborn about taking her pain meds I'm gonna beat her with a large banana


----------



## HottiMegan

I'm sad that Max is sick. 2 days before his birthday. My parents come tomorrow from Chicago for a visit and his body decided to get sick. I don't have transportation to take him to the doctor either. It's a big suck living with one car. Worst timing ever for an illness. I was hoping it would be just a cold to run its course but he's spiking fevers now.. fun stuff


----------



## CastingPearls

I forgot what this antibiotic does to my stomach. I feel like I've eaten broken glass. 

Damn you flu! Damn you to hell!!!!!


----------



## Zandoz

3:00am in the morning and I can't sleep again...even after 2 different herbal sleep aids, a double dose of benedryl, and an ambien


----------



## CAMellie

Monday is our 3rd anniversary and I'm sad the restaurant we went to for our first romantic date went out of business this week.


----------



## CastingPearls

My baby brother Donny passed away today suddenly. He was 41. My heart is broken.


----------



## WVMountainrear

CastingPearls said:


> My baby brother Donny passed away today suddenly. He was 41. My heart is broken.



My sincerest condolences, Lainey.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

CastingPearls said:


> My baby brother Donny passed away today suddenly. He was 41. My heart is broken.



Oh Lainey.  I am so, so sorry.  *many gentle hugs*


----------



## tonynyc

CastingPearls said:


> My baby brother Donny passed away today suddenly. He was 41. My heart is broken.



So sorry for your loss


----------



## penguin

CastingPearls said:


> My baby brother Donny passed away today suddenly. He was 41. My heart is broken.



I am so sorry


----------



## littlefairywren

CastingPearls said:


> My baby brother Donny passed away today suddenly. He was 41. My heart is broken.



My thoughts and love are with you at this most difficult time, Lainey. I am so sorry for your loss


----------



## Mathias

CastingPearls said:


> My baby brother Donny passed away today suddenly. He was 41. My heart is broken.



I'm so sorry to hear that Elaine. My condolences.


----------



## PunkyGurly74

CastingPearls said:


> My baby brother Donny passed away today suddenly. He was 41. My heart is broken.



I am so very sorry


----------



## CAMellie

CastingPearls said:


> My baby brother Donny passed away today suddenly. He was 41. My heart is broken.



My condolences to you and your family.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

CastingPearls said:


> My baby brother Donny passed away today suddenly. He was 41. My heart is broken.


I'm so sorry for your loss  ((Hug))


----------



## Rowan

As if I didnt have enough problems with the arthritis in my hips, knees and ankles...some drunk girl at the bar fell into me and knocked me to the ground Friday night, which in turn twisted my knee and now it's swollen, I'm limping, and it hurts like a bugger


----------



## fatgirlflyin

CastingPearls said:


> My baby brother Donny passed away today suddenly. He was 41. My heart is broken.



Very sorry for your loss.


----------



## Rowan

CastingPearls said:


> My baby brother Donny passed away today suddenly. He was 41. My heart is broken.



I'm sorry to hear that Casting  My prayers are with you and your family. *hugs*


----------



## Donna

CP, I am sorry to read of your loss. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.


----------



## AuntHen

CastingPearls said:


> My baby brother Donny passed away today suddenly. He was 41. My heart is broken.




HUGGGGGGGGGGGGGG... Oh Lainey!!! So sorry!!


----------



## Your Plump Princess

Today was my birthday party...
...Mid-Way through the party, my mom called me and told me they had to put my cuddle-pug to sleep. The vet suspects he had a brain tumor, and the only thing they could have done was prolonged his life by 2 days to a week and a half.


----------



## CastingPearls

Today the vultures have begun to descend on my brother's meager belongings. I don't want anything. I just want him back.

Thank you everyone for your heartfelt emails, posts and PMs.


----------



## penguin

I feel invisible.


----------



## JerseyGirl07093

CastingPearls said:


> My baby brother Donny passed away today suddenly. He was 41. My heart is broken.



I am so very sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.


----------



## JerseyGirl07093

I just found out today that a friend of mine who died has no grave stone or marker of any kind on her grave. Her husband never put anything there. This just makes me so sad. You wouldn't even know she is there, you'd just think it was a patch of grass. I'm broker than broke but I'm gonna see what I can do about getting some donations and putting some kind of marker on her grave. She deserves at least that.
Also, I think her husband is a jerk for not doing a damn thing about it.


----------



## Blackjack

CastingPearls said:


> My baby brother Donny passed away today suddenly. He was 41. My heart is broken.



I'm so sorry.


----------



## Shosh

CastingPearls said:


> My baby brother Donny passed away today suddenly. He was 41. My heart is broken.



My sincere condolences Elaine. I am very sorry to hear that


----------



## MisticalMisty

JerseyGirl07093 said:


> I just found out today that a friend of mine who died has no grave stone or marker of any kind on her grave. Her husband never put anything there. This just makes me so sad. You wouldn't even know she is there, you'd just think it was a patch of grass. I'm broker than broke but I'm gonna see what I can do about getting some donations and putting some kind of marker on her grave. She deserves at least that.
> Also, I think her husband is a jerk for not doing a damn thing about it.



My grandmother has been gone almost 11 years and she doesn't have a marker either. I haven't been to her grave in so long I'm not even sure I could find it.


----------



## 1love_emily

I know I have lots of bad days. And music always helps me. Here's a beautiful song by Mike Lombardo

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JW4UZ56dSoI&feature=watch_response_rev


----------



## 1love_emily

CastingPearls said:


> My baby brother Donny passed away today suddenly. He was 41. My heart is broken.



CP, I am so sorry for your loss.  You will be in my thoughts.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

CastingPearls said:


> Today the vultures have begun to descend on my brother's meager belongings. I don't want anything. I just want him back.
> 
> Thank you everyone for your heartfelt emails, posts and PMs.



This post breaks my heart.  I am so sorry, Lainey. I wish I had the words to make it all better or the power to take the pain away. Please know I am sending you the gentlest of hugs from here in Va.


----------



## Punkin1024

CastingPearls said:


> Today the vultures have begun to descend on my brother's meager belongings. I don't want anything. I just want him back.
> 
> Thank you everyone for your heartfelt emails, posts and PMs.



This too, makes me so, so sad. Elaine, I wish I could be there for you. Just know I am praying for you and your family.


----------



## Rowan

Your Plump Princess said:


> Today was my birthday party...
> ...Mid-Way through the party, my mom called me and told me they had to put my cuddle-pug to sleep. The vet suspects he had a brain tumor, and the only thing they could have done was prolonged his life by 2 days to a week and a half.



Sorry to hear that a day that is supposed to be a celebration for you was ruined by such bad news  *hugs*


----------



## Admiral_Snackbar

While I've often been berated for lacking common sense, I am smart enough to string together a couple of obscure text messages. I hope my concerns are unwarranted.


----------



## mimosa

CastingPearls said:


> My baby brother Donny passed away today suddenly. He was 41. My heart is broken.




I will be praying for you and your family. God bless you, darling. XOXOOXOX


----------



## blueeyedevie

I'm sad, that even when I try my hardest nothing is ever good enough. I am sad that I keep gaining the same weight I just lost back then repeating the process of loosing and gaining. I miss my momma...Most of all I'm sad that I'm 32, in a engagement that has been going for two years now and still no wedding date...


----------



## CAMellie

I'm sad that 12 years of being spoon fed hearsay and rumors has made it so my daughter has a mental image of a me that doesn't exists...that has NEVER existed...and will never exist. But I will be here to answer all her questions with honesty and dignity. Because I have nothing to hide. NOTHING!


----------



## Deven

I was driving home from Walmart when I saw a kitty thrashing in the middle of the road after being hit. And it was the "you-know-there's-nothing-you-can-do" sort of hit.

I turned my car around to make sure it was dead, because if it wasn't, I was going to put it out of its misery... I think the woman who was in the car behind the one who hit it did it for me. I thank her, because I don't know if I could've. I worked myself up so bad when I got home I went into a panic attack and a dry heave attack because my throat was so parched from crying.

The kitty deserved a better end.


----------



## mossystate

DevenDoom said:


> I was driving home from Walmart when I saw a kitty thrashing in the middle of the road after being hit. And it was the "you-know-there's-nothing-you-can-do" sort of hit.
> 
> I turned my car around to make sure it was dead, because if it wasn't, I was going to put it out of its misery... I think the woman who was in the car behind the one who hit it did it for me. I thank her, because I don't know if I could've. I worked myself up so bad when I got home I went into a panic attack and a dry heave attack because my throat was so parched from crying.
> 
> The kitty deserved a better end.



Poor little kitten.  Thank you for not just continuing on. I had to make that kind of decision more than once when I was a teenager. It's hell, no matter that you are doing the suffering animal a kindness. You are good people.


----------



## cinnamitch

DevenDoom said:


> I was driving home from Walmart when I saw a kitty thrashing in the middle of the road after being hit. And it was the "you-know-there's-nothing-you-can-do" sort of hit.
> 
> I turned my car around to make sure it was dead, because if it wasn't, I was going to put it out of its misery... I think the woman who was in the car behind the one who hit it did it for me. I thank her, because I don't know if I could've. I worked myself up so bad when I got home I went into a panic attack and a dry heave attack because my throat was so parched from crying.
> 
> The kitty deserved a better end.



I just sat here and cried my eyes out for this kitty.


----------



## Deven

cinnamitch said:


> I just sat here and cried my eyes out for this kitty.



I have all afternoon


----------



## Mathias

It kills me that I can't be there physically for a friend of mine. She just lost someone that was like a mother to her and she's devastated. I wish there were more I could do. :really sad:


----------



## penguin

The falling out I've had with my best friend upsets me. She seems to be happy to throw away almost 30 years of friendship after our first argument as adults, and seems to be stopping her daughter (my goddaughter) from wanting to spend time with me.


----------



## Linda

April is not over yet. Usually I cherish everyday and try not to ruh through them but (stomps foot) I need May to be here!


----------



## SMA413

It's tragic that my sister is so far deep into her mental illness that any help we try to provide is seen by her as an attempt to control her. Everything we say or do for her is so contorted and so twisted in her head that I think that it is almost impossible to reach her. The people she's around are just as unbalanced as her, so I fear for both my sister's safety as well as my baby niece's safety.


----------



## rg770Ibanez

I hit an unknown small animal on the way home from work last night. The worst part is that it kept running off after I hit it so it probably suffered for a little while


----------



## danielson123

My best friend's dog, Sable passed away today.


----------



## AuntHen

I just miss him so badly right now... this situation is not fair!


----------



## Heyyou

fat9276 said:


> I just miss him so badly right now... this situation is not fair!



Lucky guy  Perhaps someone can step in for the interim?


----------



## Sydney Vicious

Last week, I visited my dad, and while we were headed to his house, a car in front of us hit a deer. The stupid prick just kept driving, didn't even tap his breaks. We both pulled over and her legs were busted... We had no choice but to shoot her and put her out of her misery . Once she was gone we carried her further away from the road and buried her, and made a little pile of rocks for a headstone. If you're ever on SR 202 near Snoqualmie and see the pile of rocks about 30 feet away from the road, think something sweet for the poor little deer.


----------



## Mishty

A close family friend adopted a little girl at birth, and she's so amazing and healthy and smart, but today I feel so horrible for her, her biological mother, who has never had any contact with her has returned to our town because she's been diagnosed with AIDS and her own family has to take care of her. I've never known anyone with HIV or AIDS, or anyone that even knew someone with the virus, my little world has been turned upside down to think one of my little lovelies is going through this at only seven years old. Even if she doesn't see her or meet her, it's still so sad.


----------



## Heyyou

Dont have all that much money at this time.


----------



## The Orange Mage

that I can't control how I feel


----------



## Angel

The Orange Mage said:


> that I can't control how I feel



((((((((((((((( you )))))))))))))))


----------



## Heyyou

fat9276 said:


> I just miss him so badly right now... this situation is not fair!



Well i will tell you what, someone as lovely as yourself should have guys -ON DEMAND!- So, with that lovely photo in mind and you DO look very very pretty, i offer to be of companionship whenever that lonely feeling gets too much to bear. So i complement you again and the black is very fitting, you never need to be lonely again. *muah!*


----------



## AmazingAmy

Had my 7th session of electrolysis earlier and my face is still taut and sore. I'm potentially going to meet my friend after he's finished work soon and it makes me sad I can't put makeup on my face for another four/five days (from experience). But, it's an end justifies the means type thing - it hurts, and it sucks, but everything is going to be SO MUCH BETTER when it's over.

Also, I totally chickened out of a job interview today. A guy called me up about a receptionist job in a Vauxhall dealership today, and I just stuttered and said I'd already found employment. I suck.


----------



## Deven

And just when I thought my life couldn't get any worse...

My kindle screen cracked. And that might not seem like a big thing to anyone else, but it just feels like it sums up my life recently. I cried for an hour last night, all because I felt as broken as my kindle.

It's not about the fact that my KINDLE broke. It's about the fact that I feel like that's everything/everyone I seem to love/care about/treasure breaks eventually.


----------



## CastingPearls

Huuuuuuge hugs to everyone who needs them.


----------



## HottiMegan

I'm sad because every time i mention on facebook that i'm sick my brother chimes in to talk about my horrible diet. He's a former fatty turned marathon runner and seems to think he knows best for me and my family as far as diet goes. It makes me hesitant to even post about what's going on in my family because he ALWAYS chimes in. It makes me so sad. He acts all superior because of how his family eats but they've been complaining about being sick too. So his diet isn't all that superior in disease prevention. Having kids means bugs get into the house and get passed around. I hate being judged by someone who should be supported. It hurts. That's probably one reason i never go up to Idaho for a visit.


----------



## CastingPearls

HottiMegan said:


> I'm sad because every time i mention on facebook that i'm sick my brother chimes in to talk about my horrible diet. He's a former fatty turned marathon runner and seems to think he knows best for me and my family as far as diet goes. It makes me hesitant to even post about what's going on in my family because he ALWAYS chimes in. It makes me so sad. He acts all superior because of how his family eats but they've been complaining about being sick too. So his diet isn't all that superior in disease prevention. Having kids means bugs get into the house and get passed around. I hate being judged by someone who should be supported. It hurts. That's probably one reason i never go up to Idaho for a visit.


My brother-in-law has never approved of his brother marrying a fat woman. He has eaten food that I've prepared, and even has a set of keys (NOT my idea) and has appeared in our doorway when I've come home from errands, with a chicken leg in his mouth asking what's for dinner but never EVER fails to tell us how we're eating ourselves into an early grave. EVERYTHING he does is right. EVERYTHING we (and by 'we' I mean 'I') do is wrong. He even gave his brother dating advice but has never had a serious relationship although he's 50 years old. Captain Couragous has NEVER stood up to him. Believe me, I do (including throwing him out) but it doesn't even slow him down.

I feel your pain.


----------



## HottiMegan

Thanks. I just wish people would follow the keep it to yourself rule.


----------



## GTAFA

I can soooo relate to this. We're told we must get along with our siblings, even when they're being complete a-holes. When someone is rude but smiles while being rude, it's very hard to know what's appropriate. If I call them on being rude and cause the scene by objecting to being treated like crap, is it my fault? Or the one who over-stepped in the first place...? All this goes double on facebook.

Sometimes i think the best solution is to make your own rules, and forget about what you "should" do.


----------



## CAMellie

One of my sisters is coming between me and my daughter. My children were taken from me - she willingly gave hers to their fathers - and yet she has the gall to try to convince my daughter that I'm a bad parent and she isn't. I'm sad because now I'm going to have to whoop her ass and put her in her place - out of mine and my daughter's lives.


----------



## AmazingAmy

HottiMegan said:


> I'm sad because every time i mention on facebook that i'm sick my brother chimes in to talk about my horrible diet. He's a former fatty turned marathon runner and seems to think he knows best for me and my family as far as diet goes. It makes me hesitant to even post about what's going on in my family because he ALWAYS chimes in. It makes me so sad. He acts all superior because of how his family eats but they've been complaining about being sick too. So his diet isn't all that superior in disease prevention. Having kids means bugs get into the house and get passed around. I hate being judged by someone who should be supported. It hurts. That's probably one reason i never go up to Idaho for a visit.



This is the reason I won't add one of my sisters on Facebook. She, too, is a former fatty and as such has a strong hatred for fat people - and I'm included in that. I've added my other sister, but this one's request I've quietly ignored. She lives with me, so she'll probably notice soon, but she's just too mouthy. I go on Facebook to bitch about her in passive-aggressive status updates as a form of release when she's stood next to me breathing down my neck, so I kind of _need _that virtual space to myself.

...God, now I'm stuck thinking about how much of a bitch she is.



CAMellie said:


> One of my sisters is coming between me and my daughter. My children were taken from me - she willingly gave hers to their fathers - and yet she has the gall to try to convince my daughter that I'm a bad parent and she isn't. I'm sad because now I'm going to have to whoop her ass and put her in her place - out of mine and my daughter's lives.



Hugs, Cam.  Kids always stick by their mums!


----------



## Your Plump Princess

I'm 99.9% my friend is going to start dating my crush. Things between her boyfriend and her aren't going so well, and my crush is all over her, so meh. Can't fight fate, so I'm left sucking it up and pushing them together. 

Ugh, yay for being able to fake being calm and happy for other people...?


----------



## CastingPearls

Your Plump Princess said:


> I'm 99.9% my friend is going to start dating my crush. Things between her boyfriend and her aren't going so well, and my crush is all over her, so meh. Can't fight fate, so I'm left sucking it up and pushing them together.
> 
> Ugh, yay for being able to fake being calm and happy for other people...?


Is this the same girl who dates all your crushes? Maybe you need to find a new friend.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

CastingPearls said:


> Is this the same girl who dates all your crushes? Maybe you need to find a new friend.


No, I kind-of consider this my own stupidity. 

I've had this single crush since before last summer. I first remarked to her about my crush on him over a year ago, when I first met him. But lots of things happened [he had a gf at the time, I went to my uncles for a few months, then my moms house for a few months] but when I came back, him and her were dating, then she left him for her ex/current-boyfriend and they've BOTH been playing the "What if?" game since. Basically. 

..Stupid Girl Emotions. :doh:


----------



## Fox

For right now, loneliness really. That being said, this is why I love coming to dims yet hate it at the same time.


----------



## b0nnie

I was stood up, I'm pissed and sad at the same time...he should have at least called.


----------



## KittyKitten

Unfortunetly, there were some fatalies in my city from the strong tornado that hit. I hope all my fellow NC dimmers are ok.


----------



## CAMellie

CAMellie said:


> One of my sisters is coming between me and my daughter. My children were taken from me - she willingly gave hers to their fathers - and yet she has the gall to try to convince my daughter that I'm a bad parent and she isn't. I'm sad because now I'm going to have to whoop her ass and put her in her place - out of mine and my daughter's lives.



My daughter and I were separated for 12 years. During that time she was told a lot of lies. It boils down to this - my daughter came back into my life to use me as an emotional and verbal punching bag. She was rude, disrespectful, and called me a liar when I told her what really happened. Our relationship was eggshell fragile.
My sister and I got into an argument over some money she owed me - so she texted my daughter and told her (my daughter) that the argument was HER fault. Now she wants nothing to do with me. No calls, no texts (other than to tell me she won't be seeing me again), and no more contact with my granddaughter.
I was in emotional agony and have a history of SI ( self injury). I broke my promise to my fiance, my other sisters, my brothers, and my mother tonight. The physical pain has always been easier to handle than the emotional pain. It was tonight.
I am not merely sad...I am devastated.


*and I still have every intention of whooping the shit out of my sister. She better pray that there is someone there to pull me off of her*


----------



## HottiMegan

My son Alex was seen by a developmental expert this morning. I was concerned about his speech delay. She didn't say autism but didn't rule it out. She said he's too young for a diagnosis right now. She did say that he has communication delays in both verbal and nonverbal. He is going to need therapy to help with his communication. I was so sad to hear this. I hoped that she'd say he was just behind and it's all in my head. I don't understand why i'd have two kids with special needs. (Completely different kinds of special needs at that) I'm so so sad about this.


----------



## CAMellie

HottiMegan said:


> My son Alex was seen by a developmental expert this morning. I was concerned about his speech delay. She didn't say autism but didn't rule it out. She said he's too young for a diagnosis right now. She did say that he has communication delays in both verbal and nonverbal. He is going to need therapy to help with his communication. I was so sad to hear this. I hoped that she'd say he was just behind and it's all in my head. I don't understand why i'd have two kids with special needs. (Completely different kinds of special needs at that) I'm so so sad about this.



hugs to you, Megan!


----------



## Surlysomething

HottiMegan said:


> My son Alex was seen by a developmental expert this morning. I was concerned about his speech delay. She didn't say autism but didn't rule it out. She said he's too young for a diagnosis right now. She did say that he has communication delays in both verbal and nonverbal. He is going to need therapy to help with his communication. I was so sad to hear this. I hoped that she'd say he was just behind and it's all in my head. I don't understand why i'd have two kids with special needs. (Completely different kinds of special needs at that) I'm so so sad about this.


 
I wonder though (not that modern medicine isn't miraculous) that maybe he's just taking his time. He's still so little.

But i'm sorry that you're hurting over it. You're such a great Mom, Megan. I know you'll deal with this head-on.


----------



## MisticalMisty

HottiMegan said:


> My son Alex was seen by a developmental expert this morning. I was concerned about his speech delay. She didn't say autism but didn't rule it out. She said he's too young for a diagnosis right now. She did say that he has communication delays in both verbal and nonverbal. He is going to need therapy to help with his communication. I was so sad to hear this. I hoped that she'd say he was just behind and it's all in my head. I don't understand why i'd have two kids with special needs. (Completely different kinds of special needs at that) I'm so so sad about this.



The good news is that you've caught it at a young age and if you can get him into speech therapy there is a really good chance that by the time he enters school he will be on level.

Unfortunately, special needs can sometimes be genetic. I would also suggest seeking out either a mother's day out program or an early learning program so that he can be with children his age. It will help tremendously with his speech as well as his social skills and cognition.

If there is a Head Start in your area, see if you qualify. They should be starting enrollments for the 2011-2012 school year. A lot of churches offer mdo programs twice a week at a small fee. 

Let me know if you need any help/suggestions!


----------



## mossystate

HottiMegan said:


> My son Alex was seen by a developmental expert this morning. I was concerned about his speech delay. She didn't say autism but didn't rule it out. She said he's too young for a diagnosis right now. She did say that he has communication delays in both verbal and nonverbal. He is going to need therapy to help with his communication. I was so sad to hear this. I hoped that she'd say he was just behind and it's all in my head. I don't understand why i'd have two kids with special needs. (Completely different kinds of special needs at that) I'm so so sad about this.



Megan, my ex sister-in-law is a practitioner of the Handle Method. Here is the website for the institute itself. Just another something for you to see and consider, should you need something like it in the future. It is a more holistic approach to issues like autism. If all practitioners are anything like Marianne, any person would be lucky to be helped by them. Pretty amazing knowledge. Hope you are able to breathe and find your path with this. 

http://www.handle.org/


----------



## HottiMegan

CAMellie said:


> hugs to you, Megan!





Surlysomething said:


> I wonder though (not that modern medicine isn't miraculous) that maybe he's just taking his time. He's still so little.
> 
> But i'm sorry that you're hurting over it. You're such a great Mom, Megan. I know you'll deal with this head-on.





MisticalMisty said:


> The good news is that you've caught it at a young age and if you can get him into speech therapy there is a really good chance that by the time he enters school he will be on level.
> 
> Unfortunately, special needs can sometimes be genetic. I would also suggest seeking out either a mother's day out program or an early learning program so that he can be with children his age. It will help tremendously with his speech as well as his social skills and cognition.
> 
> If there is a Head Start in your area, see if you qualify. They should be starting enrollments for the 2011-2012 school year. A lot of churches offer mdo programs twice a week at a small fee.
> 
> Let me know if you need any help/suggestions!





mossystate said:


> Megan, my ex sister-in-law is a practitioner of the Handle Method. Here is the website for the institute itself. Just another something for you to see and consider, should you need something like it in the future. It is a more holistic approach to issues like autism. If all practitioners are anything like Marianne, any person would be lucky to be helped by them. Pretty amazing knowledge. Hope you are able to breathe and find your path with this.
> 
> http://www.handle.org/



Thank you all for your responses. We are in the process of getting him enrolled in an early intervention program, that's why Alex got the evaluation this morning. He sees a speech therapist on Wednesday for evaluation. We should start getting therapeutic services for him in the next couple of weeks. She said that she can't do a diagnosis and that it could take up to a year of therapy and testing to figure out what exactly is going on. So right now it's up in the air. My nephew has aspergers and my mom said that Alex reminded her of him when he was a toddler. She didn't say anything to me until i was telling her what the developmental woman today. I am hoping that he will catch up with the help of therapists.

Once he's 3, she mentioned enrolling him in the same preschool that Max was in. It's a really cool preschool that mixes "regular" kids with the special needs kids. They also do therapies while in class. I was kind of hoping to get him into that school as a "regular" kid when he turned three. So now, he might just be in the special category. 

It's too early to see what will happen so i'm sort of mourning it all. I just have to trudge forward and get connected like i did with Max.


----------



## Punkin1024

A sweet, well-loved lady from work lost her battle with cancer this past Saturday. Everyone at work is taking this very hard. News like this only compounds to my heartache since we lost three family members within one week lately. This lady's death also reminds me of when I lost my Mom to cancer in 1996 - she died in the same hospital. Then there are the fires all around us and the air stinks. I really, really need some happy news.


----------



## easybeat

not being able to find any good friends has definitely been something that has been bothering me for awhile.


----------



## Lamia

Planning my grandmother's memorial. She was 89 years old. It makes me sad that they took her to the ER and told them she was having trouble breathing, but because she wasn't having chest pains they did nothing until she drowned in her own fluids from congestive heart failure. 

My aunt kept telling them they needed to put a cath in her lungs and drain the fluid, but they were busy. 

When my grandma stopped breathing she walked outside to get the nurse who's repsonse was "What now?"

At least she wasn't by herself when she passed.


----------



## sugar and spice

Punkin1024 said:


> A sweet, well-loved lady from work lost her battle with cancer this past Saturday. Everyone at work is taking this very hard. News like this only compounds to my heartache since we lost three family members within one week lately. This lady's death also reminds me of when I lost my Mom to cancer in 1996 - she died in the same hospital. Then there are the fires all around us and the air stinks. I really, really need some happy news.



I'm so sorry Ella I know you have had a lot of heartbreaking loss lately. I have kept you in my prayers and I really wish you and your family some well deserved happiness ASAP hugs.


----------



## Surlysomething

Punkin1024 said:


> A sweet, well-loved lady from work lost her battle with cancer this past Saturday. Everyone at work is taking this very hard. News like this only compounds to my heartache since we lost three family members within one week lately. This lady's death also reminds me of when I lost my Mom to cancer in 1996 - she died in the same hospital. Then there are the fires all around us and the air stinks. I really, really need some happy news.


 
I'm sorry. Life is so painful sometimes and when there are multiple things going on at once it can be really overwhelming. 

Take care of yourself.


----------



## Surlysomething

Lamia said:


> Planning my grandmother's memorial. She was 89 years old. It makes me sad that they took her to the ER and told them she was having trouble breathing, but because she wasn't having chest pains they did nothing until she drowned in her own fluids from congestive heart failure.
> 
> My aunt kept telling them they needed to put a cath in her lungs and drain the fluid, but they were busy.
> 
> When my grandma stopped breathing she walked outside to get the nurse who's repsonse was "What now?"
> 
> At least she wasn't by herself when she passed.


 
I'm very sorry for your loss. It makes you shake your head how hospitals can get away with things like that. Maybe when you guys have some time you can write them and tell them your feelings on her care.


----------



## Heyyou

The not knowing of the future is having me slightly down at this time.

My best wishes to everyone with health issues, and losses!


----------



## sugar and spice

Lamia said:


> Planning my grandmother's memorial. She was 89 years old. It makes me sad that they took her to the ER and told them she was having trouble breathing, but because she wasn't having chest pains they did nothing until she drowned in her own fluids from congestive heart failure.
> 
> My aunt kept telling them they needed to put a cath in her lungs and drain the fluid, but they were busy.
> 
> When my grandma stopped breathing she walked outside to get the nurse who's repsonse was "What now?"
> 
> At least she wasn't by herself when she passed.



I am so sorry for your loss, I can't believe how cold and uncaring you and your GrandMother were treated by that hospital. Something should be done that just isn't right. HUGS


----------



## mossystate

Punkin1024 said:


> A sweet, well-loved lady from work lost her battle with cancer this past Saturday. Everyone at work is taking this very hard. News like this only compounds to my heartache since we lost three family members within one week lately. This lady's death also reminds me of when I lost my Mom to cancer in 1996 - she died in the same hospital. Then there are the fires all around us and the air stinks. I really, really need some happy news.



So sorry, Ella. There isn't much to say except I hope you can nab tiny bits of anything that comforts you and makes you smile. Take good care.


----------



## CastingPearls

Lamia said:


> Planning my grandmother's memorial. She was 89 years old. It makes me sad that they took her to the ER and told them she was having trouble breathing, but because she wasn't having chest pains they did nothing until she drowned in her own fluids from congestive heart failure.
> 
> My aunt kept telling them they needed to put a cath in her lungs and drain the fluid, but they were busy.
> 
> When my grandma stopped breathing she walked outside to get the nurse who's repsonse was "What now?"
> 
> At least she wasn't by herself when she passed.


I'm so sorry. My heart goes out to you and your family.


----------



## mel

Punkin1024 said:


> A sweet, well-loved lady from work lost her battle with cancer this past Saturday. Everyone at work is taking this very hard. News like this only compounds to my heartache since we lost three family members within one week lately. This lady's death also reminds me of when I lost my Mom to cancer in 1996 - she died in the same hospital. Then there are the fires all around us and the air stinks. I really, really need some happy news.




sending hugs your way! I am so sorry you have had to deal with so much loss in such a short amount of time. I wishing you some peace and comfort during these hard times ((((((((hugs))))))))



Lamia said:


> Planning my grandmother's memorial. She was 89 years old. It makes me sad that they took her to the ER and told them she was having trouble breathing, but because she wasn't having chest pains they did nothing until she drowned in her own fluids from congestive heart failure.
> 
> My aunt kept telling them they needed to put a cath in her lungs and drain the fluid, but they were busy.
> 
> When my grandma stopped breathing she walked outside to get the nurse who's repsonse was "What now?"
> 
> At least she wasn't by herself when she passed.



(((((((((hugssssss))))))))) Oh my goodness, that just breaks my heart! It's so sad when people don;t want to listen to others about what they feel (know) need to be done in regard to medical attention. I hope you and your family can celebrate the long life your grandma was able to live and can comfort one another to help the healing. 



easybeat said:


> not being able to find any good friends has definitely been something that has been bothering me for awhile.



I can relate to this. The couple of close friends I have made since moving away from all my family and friends have since moved to other states themselves. It can be very hard to make new friends. I am sending you a BIG HUG and hoping you can meet a special friend soon to begin a long lasting friendship


----------



## MisticalMisty

I've been talking to my sister and my Dad. I've met them only once..back in 2000 and then we lost contact until 2 weeks ago.

My brother was murdered back in July..I had found out about it in Mid-October.

They had to go to court today. There were 4 people involved in the murder...3 accessories and the one that actually shot my brother. The other's took plea agreements, but the shooter refused. So, now it will go to trial.

It's really hard on both my sister and dad. I'm trying my best to offer words of comfort and encouragement, but I don't have the same emotional connection to my brother as they both do. I barely knew him...had only been with him once or twice. 

I just wish that I could do more for them. I know in my heart that just reaching out was probably the best thing I could have done...I just wish that there was more that I could do.


----------



## snuggletiger

but what you're doing Misty is better then doing nothing at all.


----------



## Weirdo890

I couldn't go to my life-drawing class because I couldn't find my car keys. That's the one class I LIKE going to.


----------



## CAMellie

I'm sad because my mother and sisters haven't done a damned thing to help me plan this wedding. Adrian's extended family has done more in the past 2 days than my immediate family has done in the year we've been engaged.


----------



## Heyyou

CAMellie said:


> I'm sad because my mother and sisters haven't done a damned thing to help me plan this wedding. Adrian's extended family has done more in the past 2 days than my immediate family has done in the year we've been engaged.



 I do hope and pray that it does not throw a shadow over your wonderous wedding! Best wishes to you and spouse! Enjoy the day, and have a joyous wedding!

I wish i had something to contribute as to what was making me sad right now. I dont have anything i can think of off the top of my head, though.


----------



## Angel

The memories of asinine and cruel comments hurled at me by so called FAs from my past and also the memories of the unsavourably rudeness and inexcusable behavior of those FAs are stirring up sadness at the most inappropriate time in my life.


----------



## sugar and spice

MisticalMisty said:


> I've been talking to my sister and my Dad. I've met them only once..back in 2000 and then we lost contact until 2 weeks ago.
> 
> My brother was murdered back in July..I had found out about it in Mid-October.
> 
> They had to go to court today. There were 4 people involved in the murder...3 accessories and the one that actually shot my brother. The other's took plea agreements, but the shooter refused. So, now it will go to trial.
> 
> It's really hard on both my sister and dad. I'm trying my best to offer words of comfort and encouragement, but I don't have the same emotional connection to my brother as they both do. I barely knew him...had only been with him once or twice.
> 
> I just wish that I could do more for them. I know in my heart that just reaching out was probably the best thing I could have done...I just wish that there was more that I could do.



I'm sure just the gesture of you reaching out to them in this painful time means a lot to them Misty and it isn't important that you say just the right thing but that you cared enough to try. I'm happy for you that you reconnected with your family.


----------



## sugar and spice

CAMellie said:


> I'm sad because my mother and sisters haven't done a damned thing to help me plan this wedding. Adrian's extended family has done more in the past 2 days than my immediate family has done in the year we've been engaged.



I'm sorry Mellie, don't let them spoil what should be such a happy time for you and Adrian. Take the help from whomever is happy for you and wants to celebrate with you and try and put the ones who aren't in the back of your mind. I'm really happy for you two I know what it's like to wait for happiness so go for it and enjoy every minute of it.


----------



## MisticalMisty

snuggletiger said:


> but what you're doing Misty is better then doing nothing at all.





sugar and spice said:


> I'm sure just the gesture of you reaching out to them in this painful time means a lot to them Misty and it isn't important that you say just the right thing but that you cared enough to try. I'm happy for you that you reconnected with your family.



Thank you both. I appreciate it.


----------



## CAMellie

Heyyou said:


> I do hope and pray that it does not throw a shadow over your wonderous wedding! Best wishes to you and spouse! Enjoy the day, and have a joyous wedding!





sugar and spice said:


> I'm sorry Mellie, don't let them spoil what should be such a happy time for you and Adrian. Take the help from whomever is happy for you and wants to celebrate with you and try and put the ones who aren't in the back of your mind. I'm really happy for you two I know what it's like to wait for happiness so go for it and enjoy every minute of it.



Thank you both SO much for your words of encouragement. Adrian and I are going to have a beautiful ceremony and a party-hard reception! His extended family are being just so amazingly supportive.


----------



## The Orange Mage

Due to a tiring and busy week, I snoozed and lost out on a cheap sewing machine I wanted. Oh well, I can just bide my time until an even spiffier one shows up locally!


----------



## CAMellie

My daughter hates me. No...really...ask her.


----------



## CastingPearls

In the space of less than seven years, I have lost half of my family; my beautiful mother and only sister Lisa and my sweet baby brother Donny. My father sees no reason to celebrate or observe any holiday today and I can't blame him because the loss of my brother was so recent, but I am deeply grateful for my many blessings, most especially, that I still have him and my brother David, my continuing improving health, the love and affection of friends near and far and even a couple of men who I still don't understand why they put up with me. 

Today talking with David, we both mentioned simultaneously that it's 'just us' and I dissolved in tears. I don't like to dwell or wallow and don't want pity but I ache for what I've lost. 

I do know that there is a future for me and a bright one at that which I anticipate with the same relish I have for the hollow chocolate bunny whose head I'm currently bashing in. Like the bunny, today is bittersweet.


----------



## AuntHen

CastingPearls said:


> In the space of less than seven years, I have lost half of my family; my beautiful mother and only sister Lisa and my sweet baby brother Donny. My father sees no reason to celebrate or observe any holiday today and I can't blame him because the loss of my brother was so recent, but I am deeply grateful for my many blessings, most especially, that I still have him and my brother David, my continuing improving health, the love and affection of friends near and far and even a couple of men who I still don't understand why they put up with me.
> 
> Today talking with David, we both mentioned simultaneously that it's 'just us' and I dissolved in tears. I don't like to dwell or wallow and don't want pity but I ache for what I've lost.
> 
> I do know that there is a future for me and a bright one at that which I anticipate with the same relish I have for the hollow chocolate bunny whose head I'm currently bashing in. Like the bunny, today is bittersweet.




hugs hugs hugs Lainey!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


----------



## Punkin1024

CastingPearls said:


> In the space of less than seven years, I have lost half of my family; my beautiful mother and only sister Lisa and my sweet baby brother Donny. My father sees no reason to celebrate or observe any holiday today and I can't blame him because the loss of my brother was so recent, but I am deeply grateful for my many blessings, most especially, that I still have him and my brother David, my continuing improving health, the love and affection of friends near and far and even a couple of men who I still don't understand why they put up with me.
> 
> Today talking with David, we both mentioned simultaneously that it's 'just us' and I dissolved in tears. I don't like to dwell or wallow and don't want pity but I ache for what I've lost.
> 
> I do know that there is a future for me and a bright one at that which I anticipate with the same relish I have for the hollow chocolate bunny whose head I'm currently bashing in. Like the bunny, today is bittersweet.



I hear you. It just doesn't feel like Easter to me. My Mom always loved to make us Easter baskets (even when we were adults). With the recent loses in our family, everyone's feelings are rather raw right now. I do like that you have a bright future.  Hugs to you! (Enjoy the bunny! I think I'm missing my Easter goodies basket because of the all the sweet memories from Easters past.)


----------



## 1love_emily

A therapeutic riding barn in Pleasant Hill, MO lost 6 of their 7 horses and all of their equipment in a barn fire in February. I'm heartbroken. As a volunteer for a therapeutic riding barn in Omaha, I just want to go help. I don't know what to do. I cannot let go of Red to put him in a job, I have no money to donate, I have no equipment to give, I have nothing to help them. But I want to help them so much. They need help, and there's nothing I can do


----------



## Lamia

On the way home from work there was a rabbit someone had hit with their car. It's backlegs were crushed. It was crawling around in the road. I stopped and put it in a box and called my dad to see if he would put it out of it's misery, but he said "no thanks to the rabbit execution". I drove around crying trying to think of what to do. It was in such distress. I didnt' have any money to take it to the vet. 

I took it to this lake and let it out by the water and left it there in the grass. I thought about running it over to end it's suffering, but didn't have the balls. I feel sick about it. I should have just kept driving.


----------



## CastingPearls

Running dangerously low on marshmallow Peeps. They're bunnies too. I know. I'm going to hell for that.


----------



## CAMellie

Since I started school 7 months ago I've only had 1 week off for Christmas Break. My wedding is less than a month and a half away and I am burnt-out. I put in for a temporary leave of absence from school today. Even though I'll be able to start classes again after the wedding...this still makes me sad.


----------



## rellis10

I need cuddles


----------



## 1love_emily

rellis10 said:


> I need cuddles



Me too... and this is too short so im going to babble


----------



## fluffyandcute

Its making me sad that we are getting all this rain  UGGH!! It really needs to stop!


----------



## HottiMegan

I'm really sad this evening thinking about the long process it will be to get a definitive diagnosis for Alex. The developmental specialist said that it could take a year of working intensely with him to get a diagnosis. My brother has a son with Asperger's and said they had to wait until 7 or 8 years old. I feel so helpless not being able to help him. His tantrums and escape mechanisms are so hard to deal with. I can't make him happy when i don't know what's setting him off. This is SOOO much harder than dealing with Max's physical disabilities that he had as a toddler. I want some answers so we can get some closure and get a game plan going to get him treated with proper therapies and what have you.


----------



## Lamia

Yesterday was my grandmother's memorial it was a really nice tribute to her. She was 89. She had a long and wonderful life. The night before when I was printing her memorial handouts I found out my niece's husband was in a severe car accident. He's 29 years old. He is in critical condition and my mom just called me at work to say that they're trying to determine whether or not he is brain dead. This happened on a Wednesday we didn't find out until Friday because the two of them are seperated. His mother hates my niece and told the hospital not to let her in to see him. 

My sister called her attorney and he advised her that she has rights and actually there might be some hippa violations. She turned over rights to the family to make decisions. The two of them have been friends since they were 14 years old. 

My sister and niece have been at the hospital since Friday. The hospital is 3 hours away and I can't be there because I have to work. 

I had posted a picture of the three of us at her wedding Sept 4th of last year on the show pictures of yourself living thread. It was one of those staged pictures where you jump in the air. It was a very fun wedding...

Please say a prayer for him and his family and mine. 





[/


----------



## Surlysomething

Lamia said:


> Yesterday was my grandmother's memorial it was a really nice tribute to her. She was 89. She had a long and wonderful life. The night before when I was printing her memorial handouts I found out my niece's husband was in a severe car accident. He's 29 years old. He is in critical condition and my mom just called me at work to say that they're trying to determine whether or not he is brain dead. This happened on a Wednesday we didn't find out until Friday because the two of them are seperated. His mother hates my niece and told the hospital not to let her in to see him.
> 
> My sister called her attorney and he advised her that she has rights and actually there might be some hippa violations. She turned over rights to the family to make decisions. The two of them have been friends since they were 14 years old.
> 
> My sister and niece have been at the hospital since Friday. The hospital is 3 hours away and I can't be there because I have to work.
> 
> I had posted a picture of the three of us at her wedding Sept 4th of last year on the show pictures of yourself living thread. It was one of those staged pictures where you jump in the air. It was a very fun wedding...
> 
> Please say a prayer for him and his family and mine.
> 
> [/




I'm so sorry your family is going through this. It seems like no one's cutting you guys a break and it's very sad. I'm sending all my best thoughts your way. - big hug -


----------



## Mathias

That I'm sad for virtually no reason...


----------



## Admiral_Snackbar

Farking kidney stones...and a three-hour wait to get to the doc for pain meds***.

***: Even with a known chronic history of them (2-3 attacks a year since 2004), I still have to go in and get a battery of tests to confirm I'm not trying to troll for narcotics. Thanks, pillheads for fucking it up for everyone who really needs them.


----------



## GTAFA

The Canadian election results are upsetting for some, a happy occasion for others. Count me among those upset by the outcome.


----------



## Robbie_Rob

I miss my wife whose been in work all day (everybody awwwwwwwwwwwwh)


----------



## Noir

My grandpa passed away on the 29th


----------



## Surlysomething

Noir said:


> My grandpa passed away on the 29th


 

I'm so sorry. 

-big hug-


----------



## Cyn

I'm sad because my last baby started school today and while it's nice to have some free time, I'm still sad about it.

also sad for our bank account....it's empty and all alone


----------



## CastingPearls

Noir said:


> My grandpa passed away on the 29th


Deepest condolences to you and your family. Big hugs.


----------



## fluffyandcute

Not feeling very loved right now


----------



## CastingPearls

New meds. Vomiting. Dry heaves. Doubled over in pain. I am one sick girl and need a hug.


----------



## CAMellie

CastingPearls said:


> New meds. Vomiting. Dry heaves. Doubled over in pain. I am one sick girl and need a hug.



*gentle hugs*


----------



## Surlysomething

CastingPearls said:


> New meds. Vomiting. Dry heaves. Doubled over in pain. I am one sick girl and need a hug.


 

Girl, I feel your pain. I've had quite the issues with some medications.


I hope you're over the worst.


----------



## fluffyandcute

CastingPearls said:


> New meds. Vomiting. Dry heaves. Doubled over in pain. I am one sick girl and need a hug.



Sending some {{{{HUGS}}}} your way! Hope your feeling better!!


----------



## J34

Admiral_Snackbar said:


> Farking kidney stones...and a three-hour wait to get to the doc for pain meds***.
> 
> ***: Even with a known chronic history of them (2-3 attacks a year since 2004), I still have to go in and get a battery of tests to confirm I'm not trying to troll for narcotics. Thanks, pillheads for fucking it up for everyone who really needs them.



I am there with you man. I have had that happen 2x already, at first I didn't know and had to go to the hospital, thought it was a burst appendix. Good luck man, drink a gallon of water or more!

All this sun and sprouting leaves and spring time happiness is making me feel miserable. I need to wallow in the only season that agrees with me- winter. A foot of snow here, a negative degree windchill over there, will really spruce up my day.


----------



## littlefairywren

CastingPearls said:


> New meds. Vomiting. Dry heaves. Doubled over in pain. I am one sick girl and need a hug.



Lots and lots of soft hugs ((((((((Lainey)))))))))


----------



## mel

parenting issues. 

people they dont have childreen...listen to me...DONT ever doubt that your world will change..you will feel the pain of the people who raised you..at some point with your own children.

children are insane..nuts..coocoo...I'm just sayin!:doh:


----------



## penguin

Family court issues with the ex.


----------



## spiritangel

a life that seems to have turned into nothing more than a comedy of errors without rest for the weary


----------



## penguin

My brother trying to shame me and guilt trip me about being fat.


----------



## Kamily

Ive scared away 3 guys this week and lost all hopes of the 2 dates that I had lined up for the weekend. :doh:


----------



## GTAFA

A case of "be careful what you wish for". My step-daughter & grand-daughter lived with me since last summer. They moved out yesterday. 

I miss them already.


----------



## AmazingAmy

I feel anxious and guilty about my writing. It's supposed to be my future career, and lately I can barely bring myself to try. If I don't keep at this, I've got nothing else.


----------



## plumperlover

AmazingAmy said:


> I feel anxious and guilty about my writing. It's supposed to be my future career, and lately I can barely bring myself to try. If I don't keep at this, I've got nothing else.



If you feel guilty about your writing, what is it? If it is borrowing the general behaviour of someone close to you, I can understand. Don't just write for you, but if you are a big fiction sort of person, write for those you love. Sometimes when our loved ones are going though tough times, one of the best things you can do is write your heart out. Whether it be exploring one of their situations or incorporating a particular feeling into a story, there is always an outlet in writing. Sometimes the best cure for writer's block is to just write a lot of crap and let it all out.  Don't give up.

I am sad about how it is so difficult being a good guy in this world and being picked on for it. Just trying to hold my head up and keep going, but it never seems to quit irritating me. The lack of intelligent and sensitive individuals in my town is quite low, so low that one out of my three good friends goes to my school. The others go to other high schools and we never see each other. I suppose it is better to have my friends, but even when I try to warm up to strangers most are too stupid or insensitive to warrant a good friendship. Basically, I need to find more good people to hang out with.


----------



## CastingPearls

He took yesterday off and cancelled our going to the wedding in NH to 'take care of me' because I'm sick. He will be 'taking care of me' by going to a casino in NY with his buddy. Without me. Normally it wouldn't even make me blink but because I'm really really sick it's making me really really sad like I want to lay down and go to sleep and never wake up sad.


----------



## penguin

AmazingAmy said:


> I feel anxious and guilty about my writing. It's supposed to be my future career, and lately I can barely bring myself to try. If I don't keep at this, I've got nothing else.



I know they say to write every day, but sometimes you just can't. Making yourself feel guilty over it will just make it harder to write. Write what you can when you can and feel pleased with any advancement. Some days you'll do a lot more, some days a lot less. If you take the pressure off, it might be easier.



CastingPearls said:


> He took yesterday off and cancelled our going to the wedding in NH to 'take care of me' because I'm sick. He will be 'taking care of me' by going to a casino in NY with his buddy. Without me. Normally it wouldn't even make me blink but because I'm really really sick it's making me really really sad like I want to lay down and go to sleep and never wake up sad.



That sucks


----------



## Surlysomething

CastingPearls said:


> He took yesterday off and cancelled our going to the wedding in NH to 'take care of me' because I'm sick. He will be 'taking care of me' by going to a casino in NY with his buddy. Without me. Normally it wouldn't even make me blink but because I'm really really sick it's making me really really sad like I want to lay down and go to sleep and never wake up sad.


 

I don't like him.

And it makes me sad for you too.  *hug*


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

CastingPearls said:


> He took yesterday off and cancelled our going to the wedding in NH to 'take care of me' because I'm sick. He will be 'taking care of me' by going to a casino in NY with his buddy. Without me. Normally it wouldn't even make me blink but because I'm really really sick it's making me really really sad like I want to lay down and go to sleep and never wake up sad.



You know this, but... you deserve so much better. Wish I was closer so I could help.  Love and hugs coming your way.


----------



## littlefairywren

CastingPearls said:


> He took yesterday off and cancelled our going to the wedding in NH to 'take care of me' because I'm sick. He will be 'taking care of me' by going to a casino in NY with his buddy. Without me. Normally it wouldn't even make me blink but because I'm really really sick it's making me really really sad like I want to lay down and go to sleep and never wake up sad.



He will never know how lucky he was to have you.


----------



## 1300 Class

Been told I will have to get my wisdom teeth out soon.


----------



## tinkerbell

I'm totally starving, but am too lazy to get up to make something to eat.


----------



## Punkin1024

CastingPearls said:


> He took yesterday off and cancelled our going to the wedding in NH to 'take care of me' because I'm sick. He will be 'taking care of me' by going to a casino in NY with his buddy. Without me. Normally it wouldn't even make me blink but because I'm really really sick it's making me really really sad like I want to lay down and go to sleep and never wake up sad.



I am so sad that you don't have loving people nearby to take care of you. Sending prayers and hugs your way.


----------



## Surlysomething

I few errands has me totally exhausted.

FML.


----------



## CAMellie

I am beyond sad and into terrified! My cousin's youngest son let himself be influenced by his older brother...and committed a crime. #1) The police are looking for him. #2) The crime has been brought to the attention of to The Ayran Brotherhood. My 2nd cousin has been missing for 2 days now and my family is in turmoil! Trevor (the youngest son) has always been the "good son" and none us of know why he did what he did. I hope the police get him first and put him in solitary confinement so the Brotherhood can't get to him.
Please keep Trevor in your thoughts and prayers. I know he committed a crime and has to pay the price, but the Brotherhood could kill him.
I love you. Trevor!


----------



## mossystate

Not totally sad, as I am remembering some of the nice and good things about my Dad, but today is the 8th anniversary of his death.


That, along with tomorrow being Mother's Day...I feel like the world's oldest orphan. That makes me sad... and makes me laugh at the same time.


----------



## Kamily

I laid too long in the tanning bed yesterday and burned EVERYTHING from my head to my knees.  Im in pain.


----------



## Duchess of York

Tomorrow (Mother's Day) will be the first one since my mom passed away last year from breast cancer. 

I miss her dearly.


----------



## CastingPearls

Big soft hugs to all of us who are missing our mothers this weekend.

(And an extra one for Mossy for her Dad)


----------



## Lamia

My niece's husband is not recovering well. The Dr. told the family today that he isn't able to be rehabilitated and is planning to transfer him to a nursing home. It's almost been 2 weeks since the wreck. It's been two days since he responded to commands, but he did respond to them at one point. He shook his head no when they asked him and squeezed their hands when they asked him. 

If he has no brain function because of lack of oxygen how did he manage a moment of lucidity?

I can't stand the idea of him in a nursing home trapped in his own body I wish he'd just died. This is the most horrible f***ing thing that could have happened. 

I am not just sad I am angry.


----------



## Surlysomething

Lamia said:


> My niece's husband is not recovering well. The Dr. told the family today that he isn't able to be rehabilitated and is planning to transfer him to a nursing home. It's almost been 2 weeks since the wreck. It's been two days since he responded to commands, but he did respond to them at one point. He shook his head no when they asked him and squeezed their hands when they asked him.
> 
> If he has no brain function because of lack of oxygen how did he manage a moment of lucidity?
> 
> I can't stand the idea of him in a nursing home trapped in his own body I wish he'd just died. This is the most horrible f***ing thing that could have happened.
> 
> I am not just sad I am angry.


 
Damn. I hope he just needs a bit more time. I'm feeling for you chickie.

-big hug-


----------



## Surlysomething

I can barely handle being here. (work)

I have NO desire to do anything. I have no desire to talk to anyone.
Nothing.

No passion. I finally let go of the heartbreak of losing my last job (dream job) but not working in my industry is soul-sucking. Seeing that there are so little prospects in my 'field' in my city it's quite disheartening.

Frustrated. :really sad:


----------



## HottiMegan

My father in law called us yesterday to tell us they found a spot in his lung and some lumps in his armpits. He had lymph cancer 7 years ago in his neck. I am hoping that the lumps i his armpits are the same thing he had a few years ago, just cysts. I'm just sad for my husband. He lost his mom in 2007 and now he's scared for his dad. His dad has requested that the boys spend a week with him asap and he's going to come up and spend a week with us which means 2 weeks with his grandsons. I hope he keeps up the positive thoughts and feelings and doesn't give up like hubby's mom did.


----------



## Surlysomething

HottiMegan said:


> My father in law called us yesterday to tell us they found a spot in his lung and some lumps in his armpits. He had lymph cancer 7 years ago in his neck. I am hoping that the lumps i his armpits are the same thing he had a few years ago, just cysts. I'm just sad for my husband. He lost his mom in 2007 and now he's scared for his dad. His dad has requested that the boys spend a week with him asap and he's going to come up and spend a week with us which means 2 weeks with his grandsons. I hope he keeps up the positive thoughts and feelings and doesn't give up like hubby's mom did.


 


Sending you lots of good thoughts.


----------



## Lovelyone

Lamia said:


> My niece's husband is not recovering well. The Dr. told the family today that he isn't able to be rehabilitated and is planning to transfer him to a nursing home. It's almost been 2 weeks since the wreck. It's been two days since he responded to commands, but he did respond to them at one point. He shook his head no when they asked him and squeezed their hands when they asked him.
> 
> If he has no brain function because of lack of oxygen how did he manage a moment of lucidity?
> 
> I can't stand the idea of him in a nursing home trapped in his own body I wish he'd just died. This is the most horrible f***ing thing that could have happened.
> 
> I am not just sad I am angry.





HottiMegan said:


> My father in law called us yesterday to tell us they found a spot in his lung and some lumps in his armpits. He had lymph cancer 7 years ago in his neck. I am hoping that the lumps i his armpits are the same thing he had a few years ago, just cysts. I'm just sad for my husband. He lost his mom in 2007 and now he's scared for his dad. His dad has requested that the boys spend a week with him asap and he's going to come up and spend a week with us which means 2 weeks with his grandsons. I hope he keeps up the positive thoughts and feelings and doesn't give up like hubby's mom did.




I was going to post something here that makes me sad but after seeing these two postings I realize that my sadness is minuscule to what these families are dealing with. Prayers for both of you.


----------



## Deacone

My boyfriend has been sent on a training job course but they have told him he has to pick up litter! Last time I checked that wasn't a way to find jobs!

And even more so, he'll be doing the course every day 9am-4pm for 13 weeks. That means I only get to see him and sleep with him on the weekends. THAT'S TOO LONG  Makes me very sad.


----------



## rellis10

Deacone said:


> My boyfriend has been sent on a training job course but they have told him he has to pick up litter! Last time I checked that wasn't a way to find jobs!
> 
> And even more so, he'll be doing the course every day 9am-4pm for 13 weeks. That means I only get to see him and sleep with him on the weekends. THAT'S TOO LONG  Makes me very sad.



I know the feeling of these 13 week courses...I've been through 2 of them before. Though on the second I didnt get sent on a job placement, the first I worked with a charity doing random jobs involving nothing to do with admin, which is what i'm looking for and they knew that. Neither course taught me anything new about how to get a job.

These courses are, in my opinion, badly run and completely counter productive. I feel for your boyfriend, and for you. I hope the 13 weeks move quickly.


----------



## J_Underscore

Deacone said:


> My boyfriend has been sent on a training job course but they have told him he has to pick up litter! Last time I checked that wasn't a way to find jobs!
> 
> And even more so, he'll be doing the course every day 9am-4pm for 13 weeks. That means I only get to see him and sleep with him on the weekends. THAT'S TOO LONG  Makes me very sad.





rellis10 said:


> I know the feeling of these 13 week courses...I've been through 2 of them before. Though on the second I didnt get sent on a job placement, the first I worked with a charity doing random jobs involving nothing to do with admin, which is what i'm looking for and they knew that. Neither course taught me anything new about how to get a job.
> 
> These courses are, in my opinion, badly run and completely counter productive. I feel for your boyfriend, and for you. I hope the 13 weeks move quickly.



Thanks rellis10
Yeah I'm hoping I misunderstood  

Whats even worse is that the only other thing I'm not happy with is how the jobcentre is paying me as if I'm still in part-time work. Theres this one little last payslip that they didn't get, I found it and the decision makers told me to show it jobcentre (bet they're going to say "but we're just the jobcentre, you have to call the decision makers who're based out of town" like they always do.)
Unpaid work I can live with if I'm getting the full 50 (+ 15 from course) a week, but I'm getting 10 + 15 a week.

Rant over lol but silver lining is how now its forced me into "do or die" mode about finding a job (not a career starting job like I wanted, but ANY JOB TO GET ME AWAY FROM JOBSEEEKEEERRRRSSSSSS!!!) Lol.
And how my girlfriend is being the BEST girlfirend in the world and going out of her way to help me


----------



## Deacone

I love yooooooooooou ^_^ xx


----------



## 1love_emily

I'm sad that I have to be back home instead at his house in his arms.


----------



## danielson123

My grandma's Alzheimer's has gotten to the point where she needs constant care and attention. Instead of hiring a caretaker, my cousin and I have to trade off days to watch her while my aunt is working. After one day, I'm already at my wit's end. It's a physically and mentally exhausting experience. I'm not sure I can handle this.


----------



## Zandoz

Even thouogh it's good to be out of the hospital, I'm already missing the human interaction with the doctors, nurses, aids, etc.


----------



## Surlysomething

danielson123 said:


> My grandma's Alzheimer's has gotten to the point where she needs constant care and attention. Instead of hiring a caretaker, my cousin and I have to trade off days to watch her while my aunt is working. After one day, I'm already at my wit's end. It's a physically and mentally exhausting experience. I'm not sure I can handle this.


 
I can only imagine how draining that can be. Maybe you can get some more help? Does your area have any respite care?


----------



## AmazingAmy

I have two sisters; one who I really connect with, and one who I really don't.

Lately, I feel the relationship with the good one has been fraying. One of the things that made us close after our up-and-down teen years was talking to each other about our problems: with our love lives, jobs, money, other family, etc. We listened to each other and didn't try to offer advice - we just let each other vent and knew we'd be able to carry on after that.

Except she doesn't seem to be letting me have that anymore. I say my woes, and she does something worse than give advice: she tells me I need to be more positive. I mean, where's that come from? It's like telling a furious person to calm down - it only makes them feel worse. And she won't stop. I can't even moan on my FB without her telling me to be grateful about something, or how being less negative would make it all so much easier. Yeah, I bet it would! Shame knowing that doesn't _change _the fact , you know? :doh:

This is the first thing I've said in a long time that I _so do not want to say_, but it's beginning to make me not want to see her. I dread her coming over now. I don't want to feel the new distance between us, and I'm so resentful of the dark cloud that comes over the rest of the day the moment she tells me to stop moaning - even for small things, like sarcastic jokes that don't even come from a bad mood. I'd understand if I was getting worse, but _I_ know I'm not. All I can think is that things are getting better for her so she doesn't have a reason to keep listening.


----------



## CAMellie

My beloved mother had a sudden, massive heart attack. She was communicative at the beginning of the ambulance ride, but she flatlined before they reached the hospital. The doctors and nurses spent more than an hour working on her before pronouncing her deceased and coming out to tell us - her family.
She was, is, and always will be my best friend in the entire universe. We got to see her afterwards and she looked so little and sad. My heart physically hurts. I don't know what I'm going to do without her. She just passed and I'm already sick of hearing about how "she would want you to move on" or "remember the fun times you had together".
I do NOT want to REMEMBER! I WANT MY MOMMY BACK...RIGHT NOW!


----------



## Mathias

CAMellie said:


> My beloved mother had a sudden, massive heart attack. She was communicative at the beginning of the ambulance ride, but she flatlined before they reached the hospital. The doctors and nurses spent more than an hour working on her before pronouncing her deceased and coming out to tell us - her family.
> She was, is, and always will be my best friend in the entire universe. We got to see her afterwards and she looked so little and sad. My heart physically hurts. I don't know what I'm going to do without her. She just passed and I'm already sick of hearing about how "she would want you to move on" or "remember the fun times you had together".
> I do NOT want to REMEMBER! I WANT MY MOMMY BACK...RIGHT NOW!



I'm so very, very sorry Mellie. My deepest condolences. (((((Hugs))))


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

I wish I had something to offer that could help... but please know I'm crying along with you tonight, Mellie.  I'm so very, very sorry.


----------



## spiritangel

CAMellie said:


> My beloved mother had a sudden, massive heart attack. She was communicative at the beginning of the ambulance ride, but she flatlined before they reached the hospital. The doctors and nurses spent more than an hour working on her before pronouncing her deceased and coming out to tell us - her family.
> She was, is, and always will be my best friend in the entire universe. We got to see her afterwards and she looked so little and sad. My heart physically hurts. I don't know what I'm going to do without her. She just passed and I'm already sick of hearing about how "she would want you to move on" or "remember the fun times you had together".
> I do NOT want to REMEMBER! I WANT MY MOMMY BACK...RIGHT NOW!



Oh Camellie my heart breaks for you mere words can not express nor comfort or heal what you have lost, my deepest sympathies


----------



## CastingPearls

CAMellie said:


> My beloved mother had a sudden, massive heart attack. She was communicative at the beginning of the ambulance ride, but she flatlined before they reached the hospital. The doctors and nurses spent more than an hour working on her before pronouncing her deceased and coming out to tell us - her family.
> She was, is, and always will be my best friend in the entire universe. We got to see her afterwards and she looked so little and sad. My heart physically hurts. I don't know what I'm going to do without her. She just passed and I'm already sick of hearing about how "she would want you to move on" or "remember the fun times you had together".
> I do NOT want to REMEMBER! I WANT MY MOMMY BACK...RIGHT NOW!


Camellie, I'm so so sorry. {{{{{HUGS}}}}}


----------



## CleverBomb

You have my utmost condolences, Mellie.

-Rusty


----------



## littlefairywren

CAMellie said:


> My beloved mother had a sudden, massive heart attack. She was communicative at the beginning of the ambulance ride, but she flatlined before they reached the hospital. The doctors and nurses spent more than an hour working on her before pronouncing her deceased and coming out to tell us - her family.
> She was, is, and always will be my best friend in the entire universe. We got to see her afterwards and she looked so little and sad. My heart physically hurts. I don't know what I'm going to do without her. She just passed and I'm already sick of hearing about how "she would want you to move on" or "remember the fun times you had together".
> I do NOT want to REMEMBER! I WANT MY MOMMY BACK...RIGHT NOW!



I am truly sorry for your loss, Mellie. My deepest sympathies to you and your family.


----------



## JerseyGirl07093

Mellie, I am so sorry for your loss. Your post literally made me cry. I know that nothing I say will make you feel any better so I'll just give you this....(((HUG))).


----------



## HottiMegan

I am so sorry for your loss Mellie. I'm so sorry it was so sudden. {{hugs}}


----------



## Mishty

I've tried my hardest not to get involved with the aftermath of the tornadoes, not because I don't want to help, I'm a huge believer in volunteering, but this, this is so god damned awful. I've drank, smoked, and fucked myself away from thinking about it, but it's just no damn help. Blake's dead, Morgan's dead, Wanda lost her home and her life's work in swoop, Daddy can't drive down our road the same way he's been driving half his life, because his best friends house was ripped from the ground it had been on since 1904, and Red is still missing. Where the fuck are these people? Why can't we just find them, a piece of them even, to let their families rest? And all these babies, all these kids, scared to damn death, I've never seen such fear in such young ones. Whole classes of kids unable to sleep or eat, just little hollow things going through the motions. I've heard trailer park jokes my entire life, laughed at a few, but seeing one wiped clean, four acres of tin homes, gone, not a single remainder,no survivors. No toys, no cars, no trees, just wiped smooth. 27 homes, families, pets,children, memories. Gone. They didn't have a single warning to get cover, no alarms, no news, just, sitting there like lame ducks. 300 dead. Hundreds still missing? 

I need to face this, help more than collecting donations, more than begging for diapers,more than the food bank, more than lending a shoulder. But _what makes me sad_, I can't. I can't stand to see it, I don't want to face it, I'm just not strong enough.


----------



## AmazingAmy

My friend broke up with her boyfriend. Her first love deserved to be something amazing, and it's just sad to see.


----------



## sugar and spice

CAMellie said:


> My beloved mother had a sudden, massive heart attack. She was communicative at the beginning of the ambulance ride, but she flatlined before they reached the hospital. The doctors and nurses spent more than an hour working on her before pronouncing her deceased and coming out to tell us - her family.
> She was, is, and always will be my best friend in the entire universe. We got to see her afterwards and she looked so little and sad. My heart physically hurts. I don't know what I'm going to do without her. She just passed and I'm already sick of hearing about how "she would want you to move on" or "remember the fun times you had together".
> I do NOT want to REMEMBER! I WANT MY MOMMY BACK...RIGHT NOW!



(((((Mellie))))) I am so very sorry I know there is nothing anyone could say now that will ease your pain. I am keeping you and your family in my prayers and sending you comforting hugs and love.


----------



## CAMellie

I want to thank everyone for their well-wishes and prayers. I would multi-quote but there are too many.

Now I'm sad because we have to come up with $10,000 in the next 30 days in order to bury my mom near her parents and my sister. My mom was terrified of fire and BEGGED me to not cremate her...but I just might have to. It's tearing me apart just thinking about it, but it would be so much more inexpensive to have her cremated and then have her urn buried on top of her daddy's grave.
We're calling everyone we can think of for help, including the LDS, but nobody seems to care. I would willingly sell an organ on the black market in order to give my mommy the burial she deserves.

Please...whoever is listening up there...help us. My mommy was a good person and deserves better than what she is getting at the moment. Please.


----------



## danbsc29630

Fluffy51888 said:


> I'm sad because there are honestly people out there who call themselves Christians who are, in reality, close-minded, judgmental hypocrites. I've always heard that there were people out there like that, but coming in contact with some of them really puts things in perspective. I would hope that as a Christian, I treat people with kindness, respect, and with an open mind. Everyone deserves love, no matter their race, religion, sexuality, or any other factor. Shoving your beliefs down someone's throat is NOT the way to minister to them. My rant is done, kthanks.



fo shizzle


----------



## SMA413

I'm so sad for everyone and their losses. So many people have lost someone close to them in the last 48 hours and it saddens me- even if the connection is distant. But my hearts go out to everyone.

On a personal note, it just hit me that I have only about a month left in San Antonio. Then I'll be working at a summer camp for 2 months. After that, it's time for my big move to B-more. There are so many people that I want to spend time with but I just can't with work and family matters and everything.


----------



## Zandoz

It seems that my recent bout in the hospital as caused me to loose almost all of the strength and mobility recovery made over the last year


----------



## Mathias

I wish I was on a boat partying with my friends instead of stranded in this fucking empty house.


----------



## Blackjack

Mathias said:


> I wish I was on a boat partying with my friends instead of stranded in this fucking empty house.



They flippin' burgers
You at Kinko's straight up flippin' copies


----------



## luvbigfellas

I'm very homesick. I've lived here for 10 years, yes, but I still miss Louisiana everyday. I haven't been for a visit in almost 5 years. I miss my mommy.


----------



## 1love_emily

I feel like I need to be rescued from myself.


----------



## Punkin1024

sugar and spice said:


> (((((Mellie))))) I am so very sorry I know there is nothing anyone could say now that will ease your pain. I am keeping you and your family in my prayers and sending you comforting hugs and love.



I am so, so sorry Mellie. My Mom was my best friend,too, in this we are the same. Hugs to you and prayers for you. I can't say it will get easier with time for you, but the pain of loss has eased a little for me and it has been 15 years since my Mom died from cancer. I still tear up just thinking about her.


----------



## danielson123

As if things could get any worse, I got a dismissal letter from college today. :really sad:


----------



## Punkin1024

CAMellie said:


> I want to thank everyone for their well-wishes and prayers. I would multi-quote but there are too many.
> 
> Now I'm sad because we have to come up with $10,000 in the next 30 days in order to bury my mom near her parents and my sister. My mom was terrified of fire and BEGGED me to not cremate her...but I just might have to. It's tearing me apart just thinking about it, but it would be so much more inexpensive to have her cremated and then have her urn buried on top of her daddy's grave.
> We're calling everyone we can think of for help, including the LDS, but nobody seems to care. I would willingly sell an organ on the black market in order to give my mommy the burial she deserves.
> 
> Please...whoever is listening up there...help us. My mommy was a good person and deserves better than what she is getting at the moment. Please.



I hope your prayers are answered. I imagine you've already considered this, but in case you haven't, have you asked the funeral home connected to the cemetery if there is a "pay out" plan available?


----------



## CAMellie

Well, my sisters and I were able to find a funeral home that would cremate her for $638.00 - that's all. None...and I mean NONE of her siblings will help in ANY way!!!! A dear friend of mine made the down payment on her crematory niche and we have 2 years to pay it off...so that's one weight off our chest. But I don't know how my sisters and I are going to get $638.00 in only 26 days (the number of days left before they cremate her as an unclaimed person and put her in a pauper's grave). My beloved Adrian is working as many hours as they'll give him at BOTH his jobs...but I don't think we can get the money by ourselves in time. My sisters and brother are unemployed and barely getting by as it is.
I'm so very devastated that the people she helped, the people she loved, the people she is related to...just don't seem to give a flying fuck!!!!! My momma was a good woman...and deserves more respect than this.

Karma is a bitch...and those who turned their backs on her will find that out soon enough!!!


I love you, momma...with all my heart!


----------



## CAMellie

CAMellie said:


> Well, my sisters and I were able to find a funeral home that would cremate her for $638.00 - that's all. None...and I mean NONE of her siblings will help in ANY way!!!! A dear friend of mine made the down payment on her crematory niche and we have 2 years to pay it off...so that's one weight off our chest. But I don't know how my sisters and I are going to get $638.00 in only 26 days (the number of days left before they cremate her as an unclaimed person and put her in a pauper's grave). My beloved Adrian is working as many hours as they'll give him at BOTH his jobs...but I don't think we can get the money by ourselves in time. My sisters and brother are unemployed and barely getting by as it is.
> I'm so very devastated that the people she helped, the people she loved, the people she is related to...just don't seem to give a flying fuck!!!!! My momma was a good woman...and deserves more respect than this.
> 
> Karma is a bitch...and those who turned their backs on her will find that out soon enough!!!
> 
> 
> I love you, momma...with all my heart!



For my momma...I ain't too proud to beg. So PM me if you would like to help. Thank you.


----------



## darlingzooloo

I finally got a hold of my contact at OVR today and found out I won't be able to get anymore funds from them for school, which I was expecting but at the same time I'm kinda sad that now I have to somehow find $2000 dollars for the fall and maybe the spring semester of my senior year....
It also doesn't help that the ladies in the Financial Aid office of my school are incredibly awful at their jobs so getting any 'Aid' from them is going to be like pulling teeth.


----------



## darlingzooloo

:doh: Double post, sorry guys


----------



## CAMellie

CAMellie said:


> Well, my sisters and I were able to find a funeral home that would cremate her for $638.00 - that's all. None...and I mean NONE of her siblings will help in ANY way!!!! A dear friend of mine made the down payment on her crematory niche and we have 2 years to pay it off...so that's one weight off our chest. But I don't know how my sisters and I are going to get $638.00 in only 26 days (the number of days left before they cremate her as an unclaimed person and put her in a pauper's grave). My beloved Adrian is working as many hours as they'll give him at BOTH his jobs...but I don't think we can get the money by ourselves in time. My sisters and brother are unemployed and barely getting by as it is.
> I'm so very devastated that the people she helped, the people she loved, the people she is related to...just don't seem to give a flying fuck!!!!! My momma was a good woman...and deserves more respect than this.
> 
> Karma is a bitch...and those who turned their backs on her will find that out soon enough!!!
> 
> 
> I love you, momma...with all my heart!



That so-called "dear friend" turned out to be nothing but a liar and a flake. That's ok, I managed to sell my $500 laptop for $300 in cash so her betrayal was made up for.


----------



## luvbigfellas

danielson123 said:


> As if things could get any worse, I got a dismissal letter from college today. :really sad:



As weird as it sounds, that's actually extremely emotionally painful, at least it was when I got a letter of suspension from college. 

What's making me sad is that I'm in a rough situation. I'm going to get kicked out of a shared apartment, I don't make really any money to save anything to move, and if I move too far away I won't be able to keep my job due to transportation problem. I have no car, and no bus goes to where I work. Even if they did, they wouldn't run until an hour after my shift starts. I just don't know what I'm going to do.

And I miss my grandma. She's been gone for almost 9 years, but I really could use her good humor and sweet spirit right now.


----------



## danielson123

luvbigfellas said:


> As weird as it sounds, that's actually extremely emotionally painful, at least it was when I got a letter of suspension from college.
> 
> What's making me sad is that I'm in a rough situation. I'm going to get kicked out of a shared apartment, I don't make really any money to save anything to move, and if I move too far away I won't be able to keep my job due to transportation problem. I have no car, and no bus goes to where I work. Even if they did, they wouldn't run until an hour after my shift starts. I just don't know what I'm going to do.



Wow that's way worse than my situation. I'm looking for work to start paying off student loans, but I don't have a job outside of watching my Gram 3 days a week for a little cash. I don't know what I want to do with my life. But, my Mom is still going to let me live at home. I'm just trying to figure out what I should do next. It's very frustrating and mildly terrifying.


----------



## luvbigfellas

The good news is that I always figure things out and I'm fairly emotionally/physically/mentally resilient.


----------



## cherylharrell

So sorry about your mom. It is so sad. I noticed you listed her yr of birth. She was younger than my late hubby. He would've been 60 this yr if he hadn't had a heart attack in 2009. I've seen where when someone passed donations were raised to help pay for expenses like public benefits or cans in stores. I wonder if that could be done to raise expenses to bury your mom/ So sad her siblings won't help you with funeral costs. When my Mike passed I couldn't afford the funeral expenses and my folks had to help me out. His brothers wouldn't even offer to help. Sigh.

So sorry about the sick person on here. Hope ya get better soon. Prayers and vibes sent for you all. Hugs to you all...


----------



## Lamia

This song makes me sad for those who don't know as I didn't know since I dont' watch American Idol. , "Chris Medina auditioned in Milwaukee, where he told the judges his horrific backstory about how he has been a caretaker for his fiancée, Juliana Ramos, since she suffered a traumatic brain injury in a 2009 car accident. Juliana even attended Chris's audition, and Steven Tyler wept as she was wheeled into the audition room. Viewers at home wept as well, no doubt." That is an excerpt from a yahoo story I read about him. He was cut from the show, but he did this song. It's a beautiful song and he has a great voice. 

This is very close to home given what my neice is going through with her husband. He is breathing on his own which is awesome, but still not responsive. Watch this video it's beautiful, but it will make you cry.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nQY4dIxY1H4


----------



## luvbigfellas

Someone I knew as a child was severely beaten. And now he has to be in assisted living for the rest of his life. I wish I could be there for him and his mom. It must be terrible having to go through that sort of emotional and physical trauma.


----------



## Lamia

So now my sister tells me they're putting my nephew-in-law in a nursing home...that he can't be rehabilitated. I am so angry right now and sad. I wish he'd just died, in a way he did die. Tyler is gone all that's left is a living corpse.


----------



## CAMellie

Lamia said:


> So now my sister tells me they're putting my nephew-in-law in a nursing home...that he can't be rehabilitated. I am so angry right now and sad. I wish he'd just died, in a way he did die. Tyler is gone all that's left is a living corpse.



I'm sorry that you're going through all this, Lamia. Sympathy and hugs to you. (((((Lamia)))))


----------



## 1love_emily

From Aurora to Omaha, it's an 8 hour and 18 minute drive. A flight is 2 hours, with added airport time. Either way, I'm way too far away from him. :/ I miss him so much!


----------



## CastingPearls

My friend Melinda died last night after a long battle with breast cancer and MS.


----------



## CAMellie

CastingPearls said:


> My friend Melinda died last night after a long battle with breast cancer and MS.



My sympathy and condolences to you and your friend's family and loved ones.


----------



## Surlysomething

CastingPearls said:


> My friend Melinda died last night after a long battle with breast cancer and MS.


 
I'm so sorry, Elaine.


----------



## Lamia

CAMellie said:


> I'm sorry that you're going through all this, Lamia. Sympathy and hugs to you. (((((Lamia)))))



((((Mellie)))))) I am sorry you lost your mother and that things are so bad for you right now. 

This entire year has really sucked ass.


----------



## Lamia

CastingPearls said:


> My friend Melinda died last night after a long battle with breast cancer and MS.



 Sorry to hear that.


----------



## littlefairywren

CastingPearls said:


> My friend Melinda died last night after a long battle with breast cancer and MS.



I am so very sorry, Lainey.


----------



## CAMellie

I'm seriously considering having my home phone shut off because every time it rings I think it might be my momma calling to chat.


----------



## luvbigfellas

CastingPearls said:


> My friend Melinda died last night after a long battle with breast cancer and MS.



((((((((((((((((Lainey))))))))))))))))

I'm so sorry she had to suffer like that and that you're suffering now.


----------



## Zandoz

CastingPearls said:


> My friend Melinda died last night after a long battle with breast cancer and MS.




My condolences {{{{{{CP}}}}}}


----------



## Punkin1024

CastingPearls said:


> My friend Melinda died last night after a long battle with breast cancer and MS.


 I'm so sorry for you, Elaine. You've had a rough go of it for quite a while. "hugs"


----------



## penguin

CastingPearls said:


> My friend Melinda died last night after a long battle with breast cancer and MS.



I'm so sorry for your loss.


----------



## sugar and spice

Lamia said:


> So now my sister tells me they're putting my nephew-in-law in a nursing home...that he can't be rehabilitated. I am so angry right now and sad. I wish he'd just died, in a way he did die. Tyler is gone all that's left is a living corpse.



I am so sorry, I know this has to be so hard and painful for you and your whole family.My condolences to you all.


----------



## sugar and spice

CastingPearls said:


> My friend Melinda died last night after a long battle with breast cancer and MS.



((((Lainey))) I am so sorry for your loss.


----------



## sugar and spice

CAMellie said:


> I'm seriously considering having my home phone shut off because every time it rings I think it might be my momma calling to chat.



((((Mellie)))) I can totally understand this my brother died in January and I still reach for the phone to call him or expect him to call me. I'm sorry this is such a painful hard time for you.


----------



## CAMellie

My sisters and I are sad because we had hoped that the funeral home would be able to get a picture of the only tattoo our momma had: a butterfly in repose resting on a sprig of african violet. Butterflies and african violets were her 2 favorite things.
Unfortunately, there was too much discoloration to get a proper picture. Thank you to Evergreen Memorial for trying for 3 hours, though.


----------



## mel

Lost a friend today that passed away from his own hands


----------



## littlefairywren

mel said:


> Lost a friend today that passed away from his own hands



I am so sorry, mel. Hugs.


----------



## penguin

mel said:


> Lost a friend today that passed away from his own hands



Oh, I'm so sorry


----------



## CastingPearls

mel said:


> Lost a friend today that passed away from his own hands


I'm very sorry and can relate. My condolences.


----------



## Bighairyman

mel said:


> Lost a friend today that passed away from his own hands



My condolences are with you. I had a friend do the same thing a few Easters ago. If you want someone to talk to I am only a message away.


----------



## Saoirse

Im sad that he actually thought i would smoke pot around his young daughter. Im sad that he didnt feel he could talk to me about it, so he blew me off instead. Im sad that he still likes me, but is in a relationship with someone else?

fuck that.


----------



## Bighairyman

Saoirse said:


> Im sad that he actually thought i would smoke pot around his young daughter. Im sad that he didnt feel he could talk to me about it, so he blew me off instead. Im sad that he still likes me, but is in a relationship with someone else?
> 
> fuck that.



I am sorry. Sounds like he might want to get some priorities straightened out and end relationships before he tries to start more.


----------



## Mathias

I won't be graduating until next year. That isn't what's making me sad so much as the fact that 90% of my friends have graduated. What's worse is I couldn't go to the graduation to say goodbye to them all one last time. They've been there for me whenever I was going through some rough times, and it hasn't hit me that they'll be gone until now. I've been shaking all night and I have no idea how I'll deal with this next semester. :really sad:


----------



## luvbigfellas

mel said:


> Lost a friend today that passed away from his own hands



(((((((((((((mel)))))))))))))

That's a really thing to deal with. I'm so sorry for your loss.


----------



## Mishty

The world is ending Saturday and I haven't had sex with a man in years and years.


----------



## Bighairyman

Mishty said:


> The world is ending Saturday and I haven't had sex with a man in years and years.



Pick me please ? :eat2:


----------



## Diana_Prince245

I'm so sorry to hear about all the people who've lost loved ones recently. Hugs to all.


----------



## CAMellie

mel said:


> Lost a friend today that passed away from his own hands



I'm so sorry for your loss ((((mel))))


----------



## luvbigfellas

I'm in quite a bit of pain at the moment. GI tract cramps suck.


----------



## Zandoz

mel said:


> Lost a friend today that passed away from his own hands



My condolences.


----------



## Zandoz

I'm out of a med that I really need, and the doc refused to give a renewal when the pharmacy asked for one, and gave no reason


----------



## fluffyandcute

It's making me sad that I have been dealing with this ear infection for a week now! Had 3 shots and been taking antibotics for 5 days  YUCK!! It needs to go away!


----------



## luvbigfellas

Zandoz said:


> I'm out of a med that I really need, and the doc refused to give a renewal when the pharmacy asked for one, and gave no reason




WTF. I've had it happen where the pharmacy refuses to refill my insulin because they say I need to go see the doctor. OK, seriously, I'm diabetic. Do you think I'm going to suddenly stop needing it? I'll make an appointment, but it'll likely be a month before I see her. I've had to yell at them to call my doctor.

I really hope you get the med you need, Z, one way or another. It sucks when doctors make no sense.


----------



## danielson123

-sigh- RIP Randy Savage. Damn. :goodbye::really sad::sad:


----------



## rellis10

danielson123 said:


> -sigh- RIP Randy Savage. Damn. :goodbye::really sad::sad:



My thoughts go out to the family and friends of a true wrestling legend. There will never be anyone like the Macho Man again.

RIP Macho Man Randy Savage


----------



## Zandoz

luvbigfellas said:


> WTF. I've had it happen where the pharmacy refuses to refill my insulin because they say I need to go see the doctor. OK, seriously, I'm diabetic. Do you think I'm going to suddenly stop needing it? I'll make an appointment, but it'll likely be a month before I see her. I've had to yell at them to call my doctor.
> 
> I really hope you get the med you need, Z, one way or another. It sucks when doctors make no sense.



What makes no sense is that the doc just saw me 2 weeks ago, and he's usually pretty cool <shrug>


----------



## luvbigfellas

rellis10 said:


> My thoughts go out to the family and friends of a true wrestling legend. There will never be anyone like the Macho Man again.
> 
> RIP Macho Man Randy Savage



I third this sentiment.


----------



## Sweetie

I'm sad because I allowed myself to fall in love with a man who lied to HIMSELF that he was ready to move on to a new life. I'm sad because I've shown my son that his mother isn't very smart when it comes to love and relationships. I'm sad because I feel like I'm a terrible example to him. I'm sad cause I thought I was going to finally have real love and it looks like it was nothing more than a fantasy on his part and a wishful dream on mine. I'm sad cause I am disappointed in my own judgement. I'm sad cause I can't seem to stop feeling sorry for myself even though I know other people have much worse problems than this. I guess I'm just plain old sad.


----------



## fluffyandcute

danielson123 said:


> -sigh- RIP Randy Savage. Damn. :goodbye::really sad::sad:



This makes me sad!! Gahhh can't believe it!


----------



## Twilley

Uncertainty. Loneliness. The usual.


----------



## SMA413

Twilley said:


> Uncertainty. Loneliness. The usual.



Ditto. Especially the uncertainty part.


----------



## Robbie_Rob

Barack Obama is in town today and i can't make it in


----------



## JulianDW

My dog is sick. Im taking him to the vet today, but its killing me to see him in so much agony.:sad:


----------



## Robbie_Rob

Mishty said:


> The world is ending Saturday and I haven't had sex with a man in years and years.



Find that hard to believe, and not the end of the world part


----------



## TheNowhereMan

That I still share a domicile with my Ex T-T


----------



## mel

THANK YOU for all the kind words ..I disappeared from here a couple of days and I also tried to rep most of you (some I couldnt cause I either rep'd ya already or had too many rep give outs..lol) but do know I appreciate kind thought and words you gave 
((((((((((((((((((((((hugs to you all)))))))))))))))))))))))


----------



## Surlysomething

Just when you've started to really get into your time off, it's over.


----------



## luvbigfellas

TheNowhereMan said:


> That I still share a domicile with my Ex T-T



I feel you on that one. 

What's making me sad right now is that only 2 out of 3 grades is posted! Dammit, I wanna know if I'm off academic probation!


----------



## danielson123

luvbigfellas said:


> What's making me sad right now is that only 2 out of 3 grades is posted! Dammit, I wanna know if I'm off academic probation!



Good luck with that. Seriously. I know what that's like.


----------



## Bighairyman

mel said:


> THANK YOU for all the kind words ..I disappeared from here a couple of days and I also tried to rep most of you (some I couldnt cause I either rep'd ya already or had too many rep give outs..lol) but do know I appreciate kind thought and words you gave
> ((((((((((((((((((((((hugs to you all)))))))))))))))))))))))



You are very welcome. Send me a message if you ever wanna talk with someone about anything. I am all ears.


----------



## mossystate

That I couldn't scrape together the funds to go to my brother's wedding this Sunday in California. Would love to have seen a few of my nieces and a nephew and their kids, and it will, I am sure, be a really fun party in Los Gatos. boo


----------



## Ruffie

This is a sick, sick world. Confirmed today that the body found burned in a car early Saturday morning beyond recognition was that of a 13 year old youth that just started coming to our youth centre about a year ago. If the rumour mill is true what kind of sick individual(s) beat a young person, place them in a car and set fire to it? My heart is very heavy right now for the family and friends of this person and for the loss again of someone so young to a violent act.


----------



## Lamia

Ruffie said:


> This is a sick, sick world. Confirmed today that the body found burned in a car early Saturday morning beyond recognition was that of a 13 year old youth that just started coming to our youth centre about a year ago. If the rumour mill is true what kind of sick individual(s) beat a young person, place them in a car and set fire to it? My heart is very heavy right now for the family and friends of this person and for the loss again of someone so young to a violent act.



That's horrible.  *hugs*


----------



## Sweetie

I'm sad right now cause I miss my man. I'm trying so hard to just move on and accept, but sometimes......


----------



## mel

Ruffie said:


> This is a sick, sick world. Confirmed today that the body found burned in a car early Saturday morning beyond recognition was that of a 13 year old youth that just started coming to our youth centre about a year ago. If the rumour mill is true what kind of sick individual(s) beat a young person, place them in a car and set fire to it? My heart is very heavy right now for the family and friends of this person and for the loss again of someone so young to a violent act.



Oh my ...I am SO sorry to hear this. I really dont understand what goes through the mind of someone who can do this sort of thing. Horrible..just horrible


----------



## mel

mossystate said:


> That I couldn't scrape together the funds to go to my brother's wedding this Sunday in California. Would love to have seen a few of my nieces and a nephew and their kids, and it will, I am sure, be a really fun party in Los Gatos. boo




awww.. sorry you couldnt go  hopefully you will get to see wonderful pictures soon 



Bighairyman said:


> You are very welcome. Send me a message if you ever wanna talk with someone about anything. I am all ears.



thank you!!!



Twilley said:


> Uncertainty. Loneliness. The usual.



 (((((hugs)))))



JulianDW said:


> My dog is sick. Im taking him to the vet today, but its killing me to see him in so much agony.:sad:



I hope he is ok!!!!



TheNowhereMan said:


> That I still share a domicile with my Ex T-T


argh!


----------



## CAMellie

I'm sad for my Aunt Vicki. Now that my mom is gone she has no siblings...and my grandparents have been gone since 1978.


----------



## Punkin1024

Ruffie said:


> This is a sick, sick world. Confirmed today that the body found burned in a car early Saturday morning beyond recognition was that of a 13 year old youth that just started coming to our youth centre about a year ago. If the rumour mill is true what kind of sick individual(s) beat a young person, place them in a car and set fire to it? My heart is very heavy right now for the family and friends of this person and for the loss again of someone so young to a violent act.



Oh, Ruffie, how awful! Yes, it is a sick, sick world. I feel so sorry for you and all that knew and loved this young person. So, so sad!


----------



## CAMellie

My momma's ashes are ready to be picked up...this is really happening


----------



## Sweetie

CAMellie said:


> My momma's ashes are ready to be picked up...this is really happening



I'm so sorry for your loss. {HUG}


----------



## CAMellie

Sweetie said:


> I'm so sorry for your loss. {HUG}



Thank you, Sweetie. *hug*


----------



## Ruffie

I am so sorry to hear of your mothers passing. Take care of yourself!


----------



## disconnectedsmile

the thing that's making me sad today is the same thing that made me happy yesterday:
i kissed a girl and i liked it.


----------



## CAMellie

We picked up momma's ashes yesterday and met with the pastor to arrange her memorial this morning.


----------



## littlefairywren

She is lying to me. It hurts.


----------



## CAMellie

The video for my momma's memorial is finished...and it's painfully beautiful


----------



## luvbigfellas

Someone I adore is sick today and I can't do anything to help.


----------



## ButlerGirl09

Jon is leaving in the morning  I've been so spoiled having him here all week. I'm going to miss him terribly!


----------



## WomanlyHips

Incommunicado- Meh..


----------



## disconnectedsmile

this song: We're In This Together by Nine Inch Nails


----------



## succubus_dxb

My boyfriend has asked to take a 'break'......I know it's because i've messed up, and I'm terrified he'll actually leave me.


----------



## Sweetie

I'm the other woman with the guilt but no benefits. No hugs, no kisses, no nothing.


----------



## darlingzooloo

I've been feeling really ugly and insignificant for the past week or two, and today I found out that a boy I am still crushing on, is going out with a friend of mine from last school. Though I know it's stupid to even worry about, or care about, the fact that she is skinny and adventurous and pretty is making me feel like everything is wrong with me and there is no hope. >.< Hopefully I'll get out of this funk soon..


----------



## HottiMegan

I'm sad because Alex's speech teacher brought up the idea that Alex might have speech apraxia. It's a neurological condition that makes it difficult to transmit the thoughts into the muscles in the mouth to make speech. The little i've read says that speech can help and kids who have it eventually catch up but it's scary to think my boy might have problems talking forever. All a mom wants is her kids to be healthy and happy and this might hinder the happy part


----------



## snuggletiger

Hopefully they caught it early and can work with him to help


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

HottiMegan said:


> I'm sad because Alex's speech teacher brought up the idea that Alex might have speech apraxia. It's a neurological condition that makes it difficult to transmit the thoughts into the muscles in the mouth to make speech. The little i've read says that speech can help and kids who have it eventually catch up but it's scary to think my boy might have problems talking forever. All a mom wants is her kids to be healthy and happy and this might hinder the happy part


I have a speech disorder, too, Megan. I went through speech therapy my entire childhood and I still have it. But you know what? I don't let it stop me. It's part of what makes me, me, and most people I date actually find it part of my charm. If this is indeed something Alex has to contend with, please know it will not necessarily have an detrimental effect on his happiness in the long run.


----------



## mel

life...my life to be exact. today is one of the saddest days.


----------



## Sweetie

mel said:


> life...my life to be exact. today is one of the saddest days.



{{{{HUGS}}}}


----------



## milfy

hubby is away until friday on a training course at work - boo sucks


----------



## SarahLaughsAlot

I'm sorry mel! i think you are a sammisweetheart&#9829; lol. I hope that everything begins to look up! you certainly deserve it. you're very kind and sweet! this too shall pass. I promise


----------



## SarahLaughsAlot

Aww! i'm really sorry to hear that he'll be in my thoughts and prayers and so will you! stay strong! for you and him! =) if i can do anything just let me know. i have faith =)


----------



## spiritangel

that the once in a blue moon I meet a guy who is remotely compatable with me he either vanishes into the ethers or turns out to be a smoker who would not even consider giving up

I want to cry


----------



## CAMellie

I lost my momma one month ago today...on what would have been my wedding day. Momma was so excited about planning our reception. Now we're just going to go off and quietly get married with no fanfare. It just wouldn't be the same without my momma.


----------



## HottiMegan

snuggletiger said:


> Hopefully they caught it early and can work with him to help



I am hoping that he'll be on track by kindergarten. That's a little over 2 years away. I'm glad I disagreed with the pediatrician. He didn't want to recommend me to a specialist. He was of the wait and see opinion. 



BigBeautifulMe said:


> I have a speech disorder, too, Megan. I went through speech therapy my entire childhood and I still have it. But you know what? I don't let it stop me. It's part of what makes me, me, and most people I date actually find it part of my charm. If this is indeed something Alex has to contend with, please know it will not necessarily have an detrimental effect on his happiness in the long run.



Thanks for sharing your story. My older son, Max has speech thanks to being born with a cleft palate and hearing loss. I suspect he'll always have to work on his communication. I hope Alex starts to communicate better with his therapy too. Once he's three, he'll get therapy at the school and they're planning on twice a week instead of just one that he's getting now. I think that will help. Also, with an apraxia diagnosis, they approach speech therapy differently, so i'm hoping it will help.



SarahLaughsAlot said:


> Aww! i'm really sorry to hear that he'll be in my thoughts and prayers and so will you! stay strong! for you and him! =) if i can do anything just let me know. i have faith =)




Thank you. I'm just waiting for the days that he can tell me what he wants. The tantrums will be a lot less frustrating then..


----------



## HottiMegan

CAMellie said:


> I lost my momma one month ago today...on what would have been my wedding day. Momma was so excited about planning our reception. Now we're just going to go off and quietly get married with no fanfare. It just wouldn't be the same without my momma.



I'm sorry you're going through so much.


----------



## snuggletiger

HottiMegan said:


> I'm sorry you're going through so much.



What about contacting the Shriners Hospital in Sacramento?


----------



## HottiMegan

Hmm.I dunno if they do speech stuff. My older son, Max, is a patient there for foot and leg stuff. We're due to go back soon for his check up, i'll see if they work with neurological cases. We don't have an official diagnosis yet. We just have two therapists saying it's most likely so.


----------



## CAMellie

HottiMegan said:


> I'm sorry you're going through so much.



Thank you, Megan.


----------



## ThikJerseyChik

I am in a marriage that was shattered four years ago by infidelity - and because of my commitment to him and our marriage, I decided to try to move forward with him after he came clean and begged for forgiveness and another chance.

The problem is - there is nothing left inside. I love him, but the feelings that were alive prior to this event are gone. I cannot watch love stories on TV or in the movies, they just rip my already broken heart out.

Because I know this information would rock his world, I keep this to myself. I am living a lie and it's killing me from the inside out.

He is a very good man in a lot of ways - he should have looked at the entire picture before thinking that infidelity was the answer. I just can't get past it. :really sad:


----------



## mel

I am sending (((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((BIG HUGSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) to everyone needing them today!


----------



## Mathias

People who don't realize the gravity of their words and how they may effect others. :really sad:


----------



## Surlysomething

ThikJerseyChik said:


> I am in a marriage that was shattered four years ago by infidelity - and because of my commitment to him and our marriage, I decided to try to move forward with him after he came clean and begged for forgiveness and another chance.
> 
> The problem is - there is nothing left inside. I love him, but the feelings that were alive prior to this event are gone. I cannot watch love stories on TV or in the movies, they just rip my already broken heart out.
> 
> Because I know this information would rock his world, I keep this to myself. I am living a lie and it's killing me from the inside out.
> 
> He is a very good man in a lot of ways - he should have looked at the entire picture before thinking that infidelity was the answer. I just can't get past it. :really sad:



I'm sorry you're going through such a hard time.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

ThikJerseyChik said:


> I am in a marriage that was shattered four years ago by infidelity - and because of my commitment to him and our marriage, I decided to try to move forward with him after he came clean and begged for forgiveness and another chance.
> 
> The problem is - there is nothing left inside. I love him, but the feelings that were alive prior to this event are gone. I cannot watch love stories on TV or in the movies, they just rip my already broken heart out.
> 
> Because I know this information would rock his world, I keep this to myself. I am living a lie and it's killing me from the inside out.
> 
> He is a very good man in a lot of ways - he should have looked at the entire picture before thinking that infidelity was the answer. I just can't get past it. :really sad:



It makes me really sad to see such a good person in so much pain they did nothing to deserve. 

You said "because of my commitment to him and our marriage, I decided to try to move forward with him..." What commitment has HE shown to your marriage? You live with this pain every day... do you think he would do the same? He showed no commitment to the marriage under far better circumstances than you are dealing with right now. It seems to me (as someone without the full picture... I know) that you deserve so much better. Why commit yourself to something that only causes you pain? I'm sure you love him, but... love doesn't betray, and that has already happened. As your signature says, "if you keep doing what you've always done..." It doesn't sound like your feelings about the situation are going to change. As painful as it will be, maybe it's time to give up this terrible situation and see what better life awaits you outside of it.

*Hugs*


----------



## ThikJerseyChik

Thank you BBM, you have certainly given me food for thought.

Right after it happened, he was going over and beyond what my expectations are..and I do believe he will never do it again and is truly sorry for his actions -

BUT

Fast forward to now...there is little in the way of romance, intimacy and it's like trying to tango alone.

It just sux.


----------



## shinyapple

I've been caring for my grandmother for the last several weeks as she's gotten progressively weaker and weaker and her heart continues to fail. Hospice came on board about ten days ago and in the last 48 hours, she's just gone downhill. She's not even herself anymore and she's said repeatedly she doesn't want to suffer.

I made the suggestion today that it's time to disconnect her ICD (the defibrillator on her pacemaker) and we all agreed it should happen tomorrow. Her passing is imminent once that occurs.

I am so not ready for this.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

ThikJerseyChik said:


> Thank you BBM, you have certainly given me food for thought.
> 
> Right after it happened, he was going over and beyond what my expectations are..and I do believe he will never do it again and is truly sorry for his actions -
> 
> BUT
> 
> Fast forward to now...there is little in the way of romance, intimacy and it's like trying to tango alone.
> 
> It just sux.



So sorry.  *more hugs* I can't even imagine being in that kind of situation. I really feel for you.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

shinyapple said:


> I've been caring for my grandmother for the last several weeks as she's gotten progressively weaker and weaker and her heart continues to fail. Hospice came on board about ten days ago and in the last 48 hours, she's just gone downhill. She's not even herself anymore and she's said repeatedly she doesn't want to suffer.
> 
> I made the suggestion today that it's time to disconnect her ICD (the defibrillator on her pacemaker) and we all agreed it should happen tomorrow. Her passing is imminent once that occurs.
> 
> I am so not ready for this.


((((((((((((E))))))))))))) I am so, so sorry. Losing a loved one is so hard to go through.  I'm here if you need anything.


----------



## shinyapple

BigBeautifulMe said:


> ((((((((((((E))))))))))))) I am so, so sorry. Losing a loved one is so hard to go through.  I'm here if you need anything.



Thanks, Gin. I appreciate that


----------



## Lamia

shinyapple said:


> I've been caring for my grandmother for the last several weeks as she's gotten progressively weaker and weaker and her heart continues to fail. Hospice came on board about ten days ago and in the last 48 hours, she's just gone downhill. She's not even herself anymore and she's said repeatedly she doesn't want to suffer.
> 
> I made the suggestion today that it's time to disconnect her ICD (the defibrillator on her pacemaker) and we all agreed it should happen tomorrow. Her passing is imminent once that occurs.
> 
> I am so not ready for this.



That is very sad I am sorry for your pain.


----------



## Lamia

I wanted to give an update about my niece's husband who was in the serious car accident and was a vegetable. My niece said his mom hasn't been texting for the last week. She hasn't been to see him because she has been sick and didn't want to infect him. She didn't know why his mom wouldn't text her back. I woke up this morning and thought to myself..."either he has passed away or he has recovered" as to why she's not texting my niece. 

Well, she walked into his room today at the nursing home and said "Hi Tyler" and he said "Hi Nickie". She said she almost passed out. Apparently the neurosurgeon says he's going to be just fine. 

I knew he was going to be ok. I have felt it for a very long time. I know this is the sad thread but I couldn't find the happy one. 

I can't stop crying tears of joy.


----------



## Surlysomething

Lamia said:


> I wanted to give an update about my niece's husband who was in the serious car accident and was a vegetable. My niece said his mom hasn't been texting for the last week. She hasn't been to see him because she has been sick and didn't want to infect him. She didn't know why his mom wouldn't text her back. I woke up this morning and thought to myself..."either he has passed away or he has recovered" as to why she's not texting my niece.
> 
> Well, she walked into his room today at the nursing home and said "Hi Tyler" and he said "Hi Nickie". She said she almost passed out. Apparently the neurosurgeon says he's going to be just fine.
> 
> I knew he was going to be ok. I have felt it for a very long time. I know this is the sad thread but I couldn't find the happy one.
> 
> I can't stop crying tears of joy.



Oh wow, that's so amazing! I'm happy for all your family. You deserved something miraculous to happen.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Oh Lamia, I am SO happy for you! :wubu: That is the best news on here today!!!


----------



## Mathias

Lamia said:


> I wanted to give an update about my niece's husband who was in the serious car accident and was a vegetable. My niece said his mom hasn't been texting for the last week. She hasn't been to see him because she has been sick and didn't want to infect him. She didn't know why his mom wouldn't text her back. I woke up this morning and thought to myself..."either he has passed away or he has recovered" as to why she's not texting my niece.
> 
> Well, she walked into his room today at the nursing home and said "Hi Tyler" and he said "Hi Nickie". She said she almost passed out. Apparently the neurosurgeon says he's going to be just fine.
> 
> I knew he was going to be ok. I have felt it for a very long time. I know this is the sad thread but I couldn't find the happy one.
> 
> I can't stop crying tears of joy.



That's such amazing news!


----------



## luvbigfellas

I'm like, bawling, right now because I feel completely worthless and like I completely wasted four years of my life getting a fancy piece of paper which I can basically wipe my ass with. 

Hours are getting massively cut at my job, I'm going to have to move soon, and I'm not going to have any money to do it. I'm really trying to find another job, been filling out apps like mad, but to no avail yet. 

I'm fucking scared. I've been homeless before and it totally sucked. And I can't go back home. My mom just kind of laughs it off or says she's sorry for me but there's nothing she can do. I don't have any friends I can move in with for awhile. 

I just feel really fucking lost right now.


----------



## Lamia

thank you everyone for your thoughts and prayers maybe the shitstorm that has been this year is going to be better now.

I spent yesterday at my cousin's funeral so this news today has really boltstered everyone's spirits.


----------



## ThikJerseyChik

Lamia said:


> I wanted to give an update about my niece's husband who was in the serious car accident and was a vegetable. My niece said his mom hasn't been texting for the last week. She hasn't been to see him because she has been sick and didn't want to infect him. She didn't know why his mom wouldn't text her back. I woke up this morning and thought to myself..."either he has passed away or he has recovered" as to why she's not texting my niece.
> 
> Well, she walked into his room today at the nursing home and said "Hi Tyler" and he said "Hi Nickie". She said she almost passed out. Apparently the neurosurgeon says he's going to be just fine.
> 
> I knew he was going to be ok. I have felt it for a very long time. I know this is the sad thread but I couldn't find the happy one.
> 
> I can't stop crying tears of joy.



This is a true blessing from God - how wonderful!


----------



## ThikJerseyChik

luvbigfellas said:


> I'm like, bawling, right now because I feel completely worthless and like I completely wasted four years of my life getting a fancy piece of paper which I can basically wipe my ass with.
> 
> Hours are getting massively cut at my job, I'm going to have to move soon, and I'm not going to have any money to do it. I'm really trying to find another job, been filling out apps like mad, but to no avail yet.
> 
> I'm fucking scared. I've been homeless before and it totally sucked. And I can't go back home. My mom just kind of laughs it off or says she's sorry for me but there's nothing she can do. I don't have any friends I can move in with for awhile.
> 
> I just feel really fucking lost right now.



((((((luvbigfellas))))))) We are here to support you and never give up hope. It ain't over till it's over.....chin up.


----------



## luvbigfellas

It'll work out in time. Just need to remember that.


----------



## Lamia

luvbigfellas said:


> I'm like, bawling, right now because I feel completely worthless and like I completely wasted four years of my life getting a fancy piece of paper which I can basically wipe my ass with.
> 
> Hours are getting massively cut at my job, I'm going to have to move soon, and I'm not going to have any money to do it. I'm really trying to find another job, been filling out apps like mad, but to no avail yet.
> 
> I'm fucking scared. I've been homeless before and it totally sucked. And I can't go back home. My mom just kind of laughs it off or says she's sorry for me but there's nothing she can do. I don't have any friends I can move in with for awhile.
> 
> I just feel really fucking lost right now.



I am praying for you. I am praying that you have peace of mind and peace in your spirit with the knowledge that you while it may feel like you're alone in the flesh you're never alone in the spirit. People reading your post feel your despair and we reach out to you and pray for you to be comforted and for things to be well with you.

love,

Diann


----------



## penguin

I'd give you all great big hugs if I could. I hope that things get better for you all soon.


----------



## 1love_emily

Graduation season is now over. No more parties, no more cake, no more awkwardly standing around talking to distant relatives and friends from school who aren't really your friends... 


But I gained 20 pounds in the process. 

I still look good! But I hate that my favorite skinny jeans can't be buttoned any more :/ I'm going to try to get back into my size 22's but I feel like Old Navy has been significantly making waistbands smaller and smaller. 

Damn. 

Yay carrots?


----------



## Diana_Prince245

None of my scub bottoms fit because I've lost weight.

Boooooooooooo!


----------



## Punkin1024

luvbigfellas said:


> I'm like, bawling, right now because I feel completely worthless and like I completely wasted four years of my life getting a fancy piece of paper which I can basically wipe my ass with.
> 
> Hours are getting massively cut at my job, I'm going to have to move soon, and I'm not going to have any money to do it. I'm really trying to find another job, been filling out apps like mad, but to no avail yet.
> 
> I'm fucking scared. I've been homeless before and it totally sucked. And I can't go back home. My mom just kind of laughs it off or says she's sorry for me but there's nothing she can do. I don't have any friends I can move in with for awhile.
> 
> I just feel really fucking lost right now.



I'm so sorry you are having a very rough go of it right now. I'll be praying that a good job will be available for you very soon. "hugs"


----------



## disconnectedsmile

i'm a better person. i've learned from my mistakes. i've grown up.
but she doesn't see it.
not to say i blame her.
but i wish she did.


----------



## CastingPearls

Betrayal ..


----------



## CAMellie

I hit my head pretty hard yesterday - dizzy, double-vision, nausea, sleepy, a severe headache, and a mushy lumpy spot on the back of my head - but I couldn't go to the hospital because my insurance was cut off.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Mellie, honey - that seriously sounds like a concussion. Hospitals will work out payment plans with people who can't afford to pay. Seriously - go get it looked at.


----------



## CAMellie

BigBeautifulMe said:


> Mellie, honey - that seriously sounds like a concussion. Hospitals will work out payment plans with people who can't afford to pay. Seriously - go get it looked at.



I wish I could, Gin, but we're having to pay cash for my doctor's visits and medications, as it is. On top of rent, our internet bill, and our cell phone bill...it's just not possible even with payments. 
It would have been different if momma hadn't passed away (we paid out almost $900 in the past month to cover expenses)...but there it is.


----------



## shinyapple

Lamia said:


> That is very sad I am sorry for your pain.



Thank you, Lamia.

My grandmother passed Sunday evening after a very long, very scary day of rapid decline. Even the hospice nurse didn't expect her to go so soon, but it was time. I'm supposed to be writing the obituary and designing the funeral program right now, but I'm procrastinating on it.

I'm glad she isn't sick and miserable any longer, but I miss her so much. I don't know what to do with myself and I childishly always wanted my grandma to be there. I used to tell people I had the ideal grandma - she was the lunchroom lady and baked cookies at home. She had a kind word and a smile for everyone. She was my best friend as a child and will always be in my heart.


----------



## Zandoz

I can't shake this infection


----------



## CAMellie

More worried than sad...that the so-called family that abandoned my mother after my sister died won't even bother to show up to say good-bye to her at her memorial Saturday. One of my momma's biggest fears was that nobody would show up at her memorial.


----------



## AuntHen

Just a weary day today.


----------



## littlefairywren

fat9276 said:


> Just a weary day today.



Big cuddly hugs, dear B.


----------



## CAMellie

One by one...they're sending their "regrets". I guess taking a single day from work to say goodbye to a family member is entirely too much trouble.


----------



## Lamia

Well, so much for good news. Tyler is awake and talking, but now he has a serious blood infection. He's back in the ER and may lose his colon or life. My guess would be that he's toxic from the arm they did NOTHING with since they figured he was a vegatable they just put him in a nursing home to die. He's on medicaid so you know what great level of care that gets you. 

Please prayer for Tyler right now if you pray. If you don't send positive thoughts. Tell his body to fight off the infection.

Thank you..



Diann


----------



## CAMellie

Everything is done for my momma's memorial service...now all that's left is to say goodbye.


----------



## luvbigfellas

I didn't get a job a really wanted. But, I live to fight another day.


----------



## SMA413

I miss my ex. I know I shouldn't because of the way things ended, but I do. I miss the life we had during the first year of our relationship. The last 6 months, though, were a downward spiral that I could have done without.


----------



## rellis10

An american friend who I have known for several years now is seriously fuming. A friend of his died recently and he just found out his funeral is being picketed by the WBC. He can't be there to honor his friend's memory in such a hostile atmosphere either.

I feel so sorry for him, he really wants to be there.


----------



## Zandoz

Feeling even worse than I have for the last few weeks...which has been very painful. On top of it, I seem to be totally zoning out for a few seconds to a few minutes, on a regular basis...the lights are on but nobody's home :blink:


----------



## luvbigfellas

A friend of mine is considering signing up for another stint in the Army. I love him to death and I don't want him to have to do that. I also know that it's likely to be at least a month or two before I see him again. 

I got terminated from my stupid, crappy albeit necessary job. I gave almost two years to that place, walking there, picking up a bunch of extra shifts, etc. Sigh.


----------



## CAMellie

Writing this eulogy is tearing my heart apart. If I re-write it any more I'll be talking about momma for 4 hours.


----------



## Lamia

So my nephew has been laying for 7 weeks with a small hole in his colon. They didn't do a very good job looking him over apparently. 

He's 28 years old and now he has no colon. They did an ileostomy. 

They said he was going to be a vegatable they sent him to the nursing home to die and then he woke up and wasn't just communicating on a limited basis...no he was talking like he always has with his personality fully intact.


and now this....


----------



## CAMellie

We say goodbye to momma today. Please keep her (and us) in your prayers and/or thoughts. We're going to need it.


----------



## Lamia

CAMellie said:


> We say goodbye to momma today. Please keep her (and us) in your prayers and/or thoughts. We're going to need it.



*HUGS* Thinking of you


----------



## CAMellie

Lamia said:


> *HUGS* Thinking of you



Thank you, my liege. *hugs*


----------



## luscious_lulu

I went to see my dad today. It'd been a few weeks since my last visit. 

He has had cancer for about 7 years. Because of his age (he's 82) when he was diagnosed he decided not to have surgery/chemo. The cancer had been progressing slowly.

Last time I saw him, he was taking nothing stronger than Tylenol for pain. He is now taking percocet for the pain and that isn't always working. I knew this would come eventually, but it's hard to watch him go through this. 

I wrote this poem for him last year and gave it to him.


My Father's Daughter

They say we become our parents.
I am my father's daughter.

I am quick to anger and slow to forgive.
I am, at times, moody and distant.
I can be frustrating and difficult.
I am never without an opinion.
I live my life they way I see fit.
I will fight for what I believe in.
I will not give up when things get tough.
I am fiercely protective of those I hold dear.
I live my life when my head held high.

I may not be perfect, but
I am my fathers daughter.


----------



## Surlysomething

luscious_lulu said:


> I went to see my dad today. It'd been a few weeks since my last visit.
> 
> He has had cancer for about 7 years. Because of his age (he's 82) when he was diagnosed he decided not to have surgery/chemo. The cancer had been progressing slowly.
> 
> Last time I saw him, he was taking nothing stronger than Tylenol for pain. He is now taking percocet for the pain and that isn't always working. I knew this would come eventually, but it's hard to watch him go through this.
> 
> I wrote this poem for him last year and gave it to him.
> 
> 
> My Father's Daughter
> 
> They say we become our parents.
> I am my father's daughter.
> 
> I am quick to anger and slow to forgive.
> I am, at times, moody and distant.
> I can be frustrating and difficult.
> I am never without an opinion.
> I live my life they way I see fit.
> I will fight for what I believe in.
> I will not give up when things get tough.
> I am fiercely protective of those I hold dear.
> I live my life when my head held high.
> 
> I may not be perfect, but
> I am my fathers daughter.




I'm so sorry to hear about your Dad.

And that poem could be me and my Father to a T. Very real.


----------



## luscious_lulu

Surlysomething said:


> I'm so sorry to hear about your Dad.
> 
> And that poem could be me and my Father to a T. Very real.



thank you...


----------



## Mathias

Ryan Dunn of Jackass died in a car accident last night. :really sad: 

Link


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Wow, Matt, that's crazy. I was JUST watching the "Minute to Win It" rerun he was in either last night or the night before. Insane.


----------



## Mathias

BigBeautifulMe said:


> Wow, Matt, that's crazy. I was JUST watching the "Minute to Win It" rerun he was in either last night or the night before. Insane.



You'd think with Steve-O almost killing himself with drugs a few years back that would have been a wake up call. It was confirmed that he was the driver. Just sad all around.


----------



## mossystate

luscious_lulu said:


> I went to see my dad today. It'd been a few weeks since my last visit.
> 
> He has had cancer for about 7 years. Because of his age (he's 82) when he was diagnosed he decided not to have surgery/chemo. The cancer had been progressing slowly.
> 
> Last time I saw him, he was taking nothing stronger than Tylenol for pain. He is now taking percocet for the pain and that isn't always working. I knew this would come eventually, but it's hard to watch him go through this.
> 
> I wrote this poem for him last year and gave it to him.
> 
> 
> My Father's Daughter
> 
> They say we become our parents.
> I am my father's daughter.
> 
> I am quick to anger and slow to forgive.
> I am, at times, moody and distant.
> I can be frustrating and difficult.
> I am never without an opinion.
> I live my life they way I see fit.
> I will fight for what I believe in.
> I will not give up when things get tough.
> I am fiercely protective of those I hold dear.
> I live my life when my head held high.
> 
> I may not be perfect, but
> I am my fathers daughter.



That's a lovely and powerful poem, LL. I hope your dad will have his physical pain managed and you will have more lovely moments with him until he needs to go.


----------



## luscious_lulu

mossystate said:


> That's a lovely and powerful poem, LL. I hope your dad will have his physical pain managed and you will have more lovely moments with him until he needs to go.



Thank you Mossy.


----------



## succubus_dxb

My boyfriend and I are on a 'break' after both hurting each other really, really badly. The last couple weeks have been terrible, and I haven't felt heartbreak like this before. Since about the 4th month of our relationship I have assumed I would marry this man.... 18 months in, we were getting ready to move in together, and this has blind-sided me.


----------



## Robbie_Rob

succubus_dxb said:


> My boyfriend and I are on a 'break' after both hurting each other really, really badly. The last couple weeks have been terrible, and I haven't felt heartbreak like this before. Since about the 4th month of our relationship I have assumed I would marry this man.... 18 months in, we were getting ready to move in together, and this has blind-sided me.



Sorry to hear that, never good when it happens but it's especially worse when you don't expect it. Keep your head up and make sure you do everything on your own terms.


----------



## Gingembre

I've been back in the UK for less than 24 hours and already I miss the boy so much I can hardly stand it. I'm crying all the time and am torn between wanting to talk to him and feeling worse when I do. Phone calls to Ghana are expensive so I need to work out a way round that pretty quick. Knowing I'm not going to see him for months makes me feel sick and even though I'm exhausted, I can't sleep. I have never been less happy to be home in my entire life, I would give anything to be back in Accra.


----------



## Mishty

Sunday I went to a friends funeral. A beautiful life loving twenty five year old doll. I didn't get to see her on her birthday, but just now I found the card I got her.... I've been pretty strong for her family and husband, but now I'm just going to let it go and miss her, cry for her and remember all the crazy shit we did. 

I miss you muchly Ashley Shay....

Fuckin' fo'real gur. 

View attachment 167201_497963064913_506754913_5876691_5289031_n.jpg


View attachment 166883_497962984913_506754913_5876687_7305455_n.jpg


----------



## imfree

Mishty said:


> Sunday I went to a friends funeral. A beautiful life loving twenty five year old doll. I didn't get to see her on her birthday, but just now I found the card I got her.... I've been pretty strong for her family and husband, but now I'm just going to let it go and miss her, cry for her and remember all the crazy shit we did.
> 
> I miss you muchly Ashley Shay....
> 
> Fuckin' fo'real gur.



You have my condolences, Neighbor.


----------



## joey86

BORDOM , need to find something fun to do tonight hehe


----------



## Blackhawk2293

Mishty said:


> Sunday I went to a friends funeral. A beautiful life loving twenty five year old doll. I didn't get to see her on her birthday, but just now I found the card I got her.... I've been pretty strong for her family and husband, but now I'm just going to let it go and miss her, cry for her and remember all the crazy shit we did.
> 
> I miss you muchly Ashley Shay....
> 
> Fuckin' fo'real gur.



Condolences to you Mishty, I recently had a death in the family (my cousin just lost her husband... and she's due to have a baby in about 3 weeks) as well and since I am in Venezuela right now there's not much I can do for my cousin back in Australia and neither can my parents because they're in Europe. But I guess it is lucky that we do have a lot of family down there so she'll get the support she needs.


----------



## Lovelyone

It's been one year today, since my mother passed on. It's been a very emotional day for me.


----------



## kaylaisamachine

I'm sad that I'm not enjoying fireworks on th fourth of July and instead of that, I'm couped up in a small apartment with my ex boyfriend.


----------



## cinnamongirlky

Being alone today...on my birthday.


----------



## HeavyDuty24

cinnamongirlky said:


> Being alone today...on my birthday.




sorry about that.


----------



## cinnamongirlky

HeavyDuty24 said:


> sorry about that.



It's just life, I guess. I just wish THAT part of it would get better. I'm just tired of bein' alone, ya know?


----------



## imfree

cinnamongirlky said:


> Being alone today...on my birthday.



You're in DimmerLand, so you're with like-minded people. I fully empathize with you, as I spend a lot of time alone, myself. By faith and listening to rockin' music, I can feel that I'm Never Alone, however.


----------



## HeavyDuty24

cinnamongirlky said:


> It's just life, I guess. I just wish THAT part of it would get better. I'm just tired of bein' alone, ya know?




i COMPLETELY agree with you on that one.im so tired of being along too,i have been alone for a very long time.im tired of it as well,i really sympathize with you on that one.


----------



## VeronicaVaughn

my computer is falling apart and its really worrying me that I won't have the money for a new one before it officially dies.


----------



## cinnamongirlky

imfree said:


> You're in DimmerLand, so you're with like-minded people. I fully empathize with you, as I spend a lot of time alone, myself. By faith and listening to rockin' music, I can feel that I'm Never Alone, however.



That was a GREAT song....Made me tear up a little, but a great song haha! Thank you!!


----------



## spiritangel

having a head that would like to implode


----------



## imfree

cinnamongirlky said:


> That was a GREAT song....Made me tear up a little, but a great song haha! Thank you!!



I'm with ya' on that. I could probably nail most of the notes if I tried to sing it, but tears would fall, as it is a very intense, heart-wrenching song.


----------



## snuggletiger

The Caylee Anthony story. Even with the trial over, we are still at square one trying to find who was low enough to kill a 2 year old kid.


----------



## disconnectedsmile

knowing that he's still in her life in any way.
knowing i'm 100% hers, but she's not 100% mine.


----------



## snuggletiger

My friend's father passed away. and I don't have any magical or inspirational words nor any comical shenanigans to say to help her feel better.


----------



## CastingPearls

everything


----------



## Saoirse

Ya know, its been a year (on the 4th actually) since I madly attempted to kill myself. The physical wounds have healed but I'm still hurting. I get treated like a doormat by the people closest to me and I know they don't mean it, but it still happens. Why do I try so hard? Why do I drop everything I'm doing just to please others? And why do I get bitched at when I can't do something?

The day started off just grand with a new friend telling me I'm a slut? He can flirt with me, tell me sexy things, but the moment I respond, he says I shouldn't be so easy.

Work is hell, with my boss and her sister constantly fighting, none of my equipment works right (but I just found out I'm getting brand new clippers! Yay!!) And lately every dog I work on has issues with behavior.

My good friend wants me to take his dog for a few days, even though its his damn dog and he rarely sees the poor thing anyway (the dog belonmgs to him and another friend who keeps the dog at his place, but he's going away for the weekend and needs my friend to take him) so why does he want me to take the dog? Because he and his gf are having "issues"and he's trying to save their relationship. Big fucking deal. I'm not driving a half hour there and then back tonight because you can't handle a dog and a girl.

My friends tease me for being 25 and still living at home, and it really used to bother me. But you know what? My home is my home. My parents are amazing, drama free and I live in my own paradise. So fuck you!


----------



## CleverBomb

Someone thought messing with my bikes would be amusing.
I don't mind my scooter's kill-switch and high beams being flipped to the wrong positions -- big deal. What upset me was that they turned on the fuel valve on my old motorcycle. Gas ran into the carbs, down the intakes, into the cylinders and past the piston rings,and into the crankcase.
Now I need to change the oil before I start it again. 

I'm sad because now I don't trust that bike to be left in my parking spot, and will likely need to sell it (if only to replace it with something more modern and tamper-resistant). 

-Rusty


----------



## mel

*I am sending BIG HUGSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS to those who need one!!*


----------



## HeavyDuty24

i wouldn't say sad persay,but alittle dissapointed.i REALLY thought i was going to meet my lady freind today,we have came SO close to meeting but we never have yet,even after knowing each other for awhile.well we came the closest today that we ever have but it still didn't happen because,like always,something comes up EVERY single time.


----------



## Blackhawk2293

In the three months that I have been in Venezuela, 2 members of my family have died. One was 32 years of age (the husband of my cousin) and the other was 92 (my grand uncle, who was the closest thing I had to a grandfather since both of mine died before I was born)! I'm due to go back to Australia in one week's time and I'll be arriving bang in the middle of the 31 day mourning period for both of them (the 31 days is a Hindu thing, day 31 is when the spread the ashes across the sea).

I guess I am sad because I will miss them and I know it will be hard on the family that they are gone!


----------



## disconnectedsmile

he needs to be out of her life already.
she loves me, but she's not with me.
she doesn't believe me.
i'm not lying this time.


----------



## Surlysomething

Blackhawk2293 said:


> In the three months that I have been in Venezuela, 2 members of my family have died. One was 32 years of age (the husband of my cousin) and the other was 92 (my grand uncle, who was the closest thing I had to a grandfather since both of mine died before I was born)! I'm due to go back to Australia in one week's time and I'll be arriving bang in the middle of the 31 day mourning period for both of them (the 31 days is a Hindu thing, day 31 is when the spread the ashes across the sea).
> 
> I guess I am sad because I will miss them and I know it will be hard on the family that they are gone!


 
Condolences. *hug*


----------



## Blackhawk2293

Surlysomething said:


> Condolences. *hug*



Thanks very much!


----------



## PastaRunner

How some job openings that I'm applying to seem to have hidden requirements beyond the listed requirements. And that I only discover this after wasting two hours of my time and energy talking with them.

I could've used those two hours applying for another position.

And job recruiters whose accent is so thick that I can't understand a word they're saying. They'll leave me voice mail and I can't understand it, so I'll spend my time applying for another job instead of calling them back.


----------



## CAMellie

Missing my momma extra bunches today.


----------



## disconnectedsmile

i'm consistently accused of doing things i'm not even doing, yet my accuser is doing those same things.
and when i try to say anything about it, i'm the one who gets chastised.

i keep saying the wrong thing, because i don't know how to choose my words, and i feel stupid.


----------



## mimosa

Misunderstandings make me sad. The only thing you can do is let people go even if you love them very much.


----------



## Mishty

My Mama took in four, new born puppies to raise because the mother had died, and because I've been house sitting and taking care of someone else animals all week, two of the puppies died. She just called, and said she wasn't upset, but I could hear it in her voice.


----------



## ButlerGirl09

My grandmother's potassium level plummeted yesterday and she fell in her kitchen. Now she's in a coma and the doctors are saying it would take a miracle. My heart hurts so much right now... Seeing as I'm her only granddaughter I always pictured how happy she'd be on my wedding day. Ughhh this is awful


----------



## imfree

ButlerGirl09 said:


> My grandmother's potassium level plummeted yesterday and she fell in her kitchen. Now she's in a coma and the doctors are saying it would take a miracle. My heart hurts so much right now... Seeing as I'm her only granddaughter I always pictured how happy she'd be on my wedding day. Ughhh this is awful



You and your Grandmother have my healing wishes and prayers.


----------



## MisticalMisty

ButlerGirl09 said:


> My grandmother's potassium level plummeted yesterday and she fell in her kitchen. Now she's in a coma and the doctors are saying it would take a miracle. My heart hurts so much right now... Seeing as I'm her only granddaughter I always pictured how happy she'd be on my wedding day. Ughhh this is awful



I'm so sorry Madison. I hope you get your miracle!


----------



## CastingPearls

ButlerGirl09 said:


> My grandmother's potassium level plummeted yesterday and she fell in her kitchen. Now she's in a coma and the doctors are saying it would take a miracle. My heart hurts so much right now... Seeing as I'm her only granddaughter I always pictured how happy she'd be on my wedding day. Ughhh this is awful


Oh Madison.....hugs and positive vibes and prayers being sent your Grandmother's way and yours too.


----------



## kaylaisamachine

Loneliness and no one to converse with.


----------



## kaylaisamachine

ButlerGirl09 said:


> My grandmother's potassium level plummeted yesterday and she fell in her kitchen. Now she's in a coma and the doctors are saying it would take a miracle. My heart hurts so much right now... Seeing as I'm her only granddaughter I always pictured how happy she'd be on my wedding day. Ughhh this is awful



Stay strong and believe in her. My prayers are with you and your family.


----------



## Lamia

I talked to Tyler for 20 minutes on the phone. His memory is pretty bad which is normal for having sustained such enormous head trauma that the neurosurgeon said he would be a vegetable the rest of his life, but his speech is just fine and his ability to form a sentence is just fine. 

I am sad because his mom is freaking psycho. She is really messing with his mind. He wants to see his wife, my neice so bad. Nickie went up and visited him and wheeled him outside to listen to her subs and she said he was rapping along with some of the songs and he laughed so hard. The nurses told Nickie he hadn't smiled that much since he woke up. \

Nickie just wants to be friends, but his mom is convinced she is trying to get back together with him so demanded that Tyler choose between them and that if he ever saw his wife again she would never talk to him again...

really??? Your son has not only survived, but is flourishing and it's a huge miracle and your crapping all over it with your petty bullshit. 

Tyler had friended us all on facebook and we were talking to him and his mom deleted us all. She has huge pictures of some girl blown up all over his room and keeps telling him that's his girlfriend...a girl who is in a relationship with another guy.

It's all like some reality TV bullshit drama. She screamed at Tyler "'I've been here with you through all of this and I didn't have to be!? Really? You're his mother that's what your supposed to do. :doh:


----------



## kaylaisamachine

The prejudice of people against homosexuals.


----------



## Gingembre

Lamia said:


> I talked to Tyler for 20 minutes on the phone. His memory is pretty bad which is normal for having sustained such enormous head trauma that the neurosurgeon said he would be a vegetable the rest of his life, but his speech is just fine and his ability to form a sentence is just fine.
> 
> I am sad because his mom is freaking psycho. She is really messing with his mind. He wants to see his wife, my neice so bad. Nickie went up and visited him and wheeled him outside to listen to her subs and she said he was rapping along with some of the songs and he laughed so hard. The nurses told Nickie he hadn't smiled that much since he woke up. \
> 
> Nickie just wants to be friends, but his mom is convinced she is trying to get back together with him so demanded that Tyler choose between them and that if he ever saw his wife again she would never talk to him again...
> 
> really??? Your son has not only survived, but is flourishing and it's a huge miracle and your crapping all over it with your petty bullshit.
> 
> Tyler had friended us all on facebook and we were talking to him and his mom deleted us all. She has huge pictures of some girl blown up all over his room and keeps telling him that's his girlfriend...a girl who is in a relationship with another guy.
> 
> It's all like some reality TV bullshit drama. She screamed at Tyler "'I've been here with you through all of this and I didn't have to be!? Really? You're his mother that's what your supposed to do. :doh:



This makes me really sad. It's so f*cked up.


----------



## Gspoon

Well, deaths do come in threes.

My girlfriends dog, my uncle, and now her uncle as well. It has been a very unkind three weeks for us. I'd get into further detail, but I'd rather just state what's making me feel a bit better...

I recently bought a new album from the Devin Townsend Project, normally he makes really fast metal albums, but this one is the polar opposite. It's soft tones and mellow sounds make me want to cry at times, and just release a lot of pent up emotion which would otherwise just keep accumulating. It helps a lot.


----------



## HottiMegan

I'm not sure if it's sadness or nerves or what. Tomorrow Max goes under the knife for the 17th time. I get sad thinking about all he's gone through in 8 years of life. It's not over yet either. I feel the urge to run away from taking him down to Sacramento tomorrow.


----------



## Sweetie

I screwed my checking account up again and am overdrawn by $3.25...just enough to cost me a $35 fee.


----------



## SMA413

So I'm working at this family camp retreat for foster/adoptive families this weekend. One of the grandmothers who adopted her 4 grandkids was telling me about her 5 year battle to get custody and all of the awful things that the kids went through- physical and sexual abuse, neglect, all sorts of awfulness. The oldest daughter was so starved and malnourished when she first came to her grandmother's house. The grandmother just started crying when she saw the girl's ribs sticking out. The little girl told her grandmother, "It's alright, Granny. I gave my cheese and water to my brothers and sister because I knew I had to go to Heaven first." 

I lost it then.

These kids are such an amazing, resilient group and it just breaks my heart to know that they've gone through so much and yet can still be so filled with sunshine and love. It breaks my heart to see all this love and pain mixed together.


----------



## CAMellie

What is making me sad right now? The sudden realization that a lot of friendships have fallen to the wayside. Some for good reason and some for lack of 'tending' on one, or both, sides. To all my friends on here (yes I have them and they know who they are): You are awesome and I'm glad to know you!


----------



## kaylaisamachine

I didn't get the place I wanted. They gave the room to someone else. Now I get to be stressed because I have 3 weeks left to find a place to stay until I'm supposed to move. What am I going to do? Anyone living in San Francisco near SFSU and want to give me a place to stay? I'll pay rent.


----------



## TexasTrouble

Does the school have a housing office that could help you out? It's probably too late for dorms, but they could have some ideas about where to look. Also, does the school or the academic department you're majoring in have a facebook page? Our school does, and sometimes students put up notices for roommates. I'm sorry the ideas aren't better. I hope you get something great soon!


----------



## J34

There is a mosquito that has been lurking in my bedroom this past week, and when I am asleep he feasts on my resting body. Its like it hides behind furniture, waiting for the cover of darkness like a predator for its next meal. I have been targeted a dozen times, looks like it comes back for 2nds


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

For whatever it's worth, a mosquito's life cycle is generally about two weeks, so if it is indeed the same mosquito you shouldn't have to deal with it much longer. lol


----------



## J34

BigBeautifulMe said:


> For whatever it's worth, a mosquito's life cycle is generally about two weeks, so if it is indeed the same mosquito you shouldn't have to deal with it much longer. lol



Thanks for the optimism. 

Though I did get a remedy from my sister who has been battling the mosquitoes herself, and apparently nail polish helps stop the itch. Though it took a while rummaging through some of her drawers to find the "clear" color that will not make it stand out.


----------



## hiddenexposure

kaylaisamachine said:


> Loneliness and no one to converse with.



This and also seeing a guy I have been denying feelings for, for years :doh: with a gal at a concert and looking over at the wrong time to see them kissing.


----------



## SMA413

The topic #reasonstobeatyourgirlfriend is trending on Twitter. That's sad.


----------



## Kenster102.5

SMA413 said:


> The topic #reasonstobeatyourgirlfriend is trending on Twitter. That's sad.



See that is why Twitter can be bad, since people can just hide behind it and put a hash tag #reasonstobeatyourgirlfriend.

All you drunkards and beaters and users, go get help professionally if you can, don't hide behind Twitter. 

What a sad world it is.


----------



## AuntHen

missing him so very very much


----------



## one2one

I went to the funeral today of a close family friend. I'd known him for 40 years, and I'm taking this harder than I expected. 88 years is a life well lived and his certainly was. I should be happy that he's free to move on to the next one, and I am, but I'm grieving.


----------



## Gingembre

fat9276 said:


> missing him so very very much



Ditto this. I feel all empty inside. 

((hugs))


----------



## Ola

A friend was supposed to come over to my place today for a drunken night of awesome, but he had to reschedule to Friday, meaning I am now insufferably bored.  Tragic, I know! xD On a positive note though, it all gave me an excuse to tell him "fine, but then you owe me a bottle of Jagermeister!" so it all evens out in the end I suppose.


----------



## ButlerGirl09

fat9276 said:


> missing him so very very much





Gingembre said:


> Ditto this. I feel all empty inside.
> 
> ((hugs))



I'm right there with you ladies! We should form a club!

<hugs to you both>


----------



## Linda

The craziness of my family. They are draining.


----------



## AuntHen

Gingembre said:


> Ditto this. I feel all empty inside.
> 
> ((hugs))





ButlerGirl09 said:


> I'm right there with you ladies! We should form a club!
> 
> <hugs to you both>





Hugs back to you both!


----------



## penguin

I feel like things are running together to create stress and sadness. I know they're not, and by themselves they're not too big to handle. I guess I'm having a hormonal dip too. Just having it all come together at once makes it feel worse than it is.


----------



## mybluice

That my 19 year old daughter chooses to continue trying to be with someone who treats her like shit, ignores her, makes her feel worthless, inadequate, stupid.....she would rather be with him than alone. I've tried talking to her, but can't get through to her.


----------



## littlefairywren

fat9276 said:


> missing him so very very much



Soft hugs, darling B.


----------



## Lovelyone

Thinking about some friends who are no longer part of my life.


----------



## hrd

Thousands upon thousands of people are dying because of the famine in Somalia, and their leaders still seem more concerned with maintaining power rather than getting everyone fed.


----------



## rellis10

I have a craving for many cuddles


----------



## hrd

London. I hope those of you in town are safe and well.


----------



## snuggletiger

that my friend was only in town for a short time


----------



## Surlysomething

My very cliquey family.

I'm so tired of it. 

Every once in awhile I feel like i'm in the loop, then everything starts all over again and you start not being included. 


It makes me want to move far, far away.


----------



## HottiMegan

Surlysomething said:


> My very cliquey family.
> 
> I'm so tired of it.
> 
> Every once in awhile I feel like i'm in the loop, then everything starts all over again and you start not being included.
> 
> 
> It makes me want to move far, far away.



My in laws are like that. Just because we live 200 miles away doesn't mean we want to be excluded from our niece's milestones. We have never been invited to her dance recitals or for the last few years, a birthday party. It hurts my husband a lot not to be let in on that kind of stuff. It's not because of animosity either, they just exclude us do to distance.


----------



## Surlysomething

HottiMegan said:


> My in laws are like that. Just because we live 200 miles away doesn't mean we want to be excluded from our niece's milestones. We have never been invited to her dance recitals or for the last few years, a birthday party. It hurts my husband a lot not to be let in on that kind of stuff. It's not because of animosity either, they just exclude us do to distance.


 

There's not a lot to do about it either because ultimately I get blamed or they lose it. It's all ok for them to do what they want, but you better not bring it up.


----------



## Linda

The balance in my bank account is quite disturbing.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Linda said:


> The balance in my bank account is quite disturbing.



Tried to rep you to say "Boy do I empathize!" but my rep account is just as empty, LOL.


----------



## Fox

My bestie is in big trouble.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

I found out via my friends facebook that he died earlier today.. He was the first friend I met here at Dims, and was one hell of a guy.


----------



## imfree

Your Plump Princess said:


> I found out via my friends facebook that he died earlier today.. He was the first friend I met here at Dims, and was one hell of a guy.



You have my condolences and wishes for comfort, my friend.


----------



## ManBeef

I've been trying all day to splice a usb cable to my old universal dance mat so that I can use it on my 360 but am failing miserably. The wire colors are not the same so its hard to tell what goes where. I cant figure it out dammit && I wanna play Dance Dance


----------



## imfree

ManBeef said:


> I've been trying all day to splice a usb cable to my old universal dance mat so that I can use it on my 360 but am failing miserably. The wire colors are not the same so its hard to tell what goes where. I cant figure it out dammit && I wanna play Dance Dance



Don't "they" have adapters for that?


----------



## Your Plump Princess

imfree said:


> You have my condolences and wishes for comfort, my friend.


Thank you, It's still hard to believe. I keep looking at his last Status on Facebook. Last night when I first heard, I looked, and it was like 15 hours ago.. I think that's what make it hardest, is that it was so sudden and unexpected..


----------



## SMA413

Your Plump Princess said:


> Thank you, It's still hard to believe. I keep looking at his last Status on Facebook. Last night when I first heard, I looked, and it was like 15 hours ago.. I think that's what make it hardest, is that it was so sudden and unexpected..



You said you met him here on Dims. Who was it?


----------



## snuggletiger

Sorry about you losing your friend YPP.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

SMA413 said:


> You said you met him here on Dims. Who was it?


Adam Lavasseur, Lavasse here on Dims.


----------



## CastingPearls

Your Plump Princess said:


> I found out via my friends facebook that he died earlier today.. He was the first friend I met here at Dims, and was one hell of a guy.


It's so odd...I saw a post he made the other day and chuckled at something on his profile and now he's gone just like that. I'm so sorry, Megan. Very sorry.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

Thank you, he was almost always kiddin' around. I think it's what first made me want to be his friend, and from what I've read, it's one of the things that made him quite popular with people.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Your Plump Princess said:


> Thank you, he was almost always kiddin' around. I think it's what first made me want to be his friend, and from what I've read, it's one of the things that made him quite popular with people.



I'm so sorry for your loss, honey.  It seems like it happened so fast, and he was so young. Was he sick?


----------



## ManBeef

imfree said:


> Don't "they" have adapters for that?


 
I've heard from a few people that the xbox to xbox360 adapters aren't very good. Unless I
I can find one legit because they were getting them from China. I just wanted to see if I had the skill to get it to work. I failed. I'm also thinking that the wire colors for positive/negative are not the usual red && green. Meaning that they have them all mixed up. Microsoft does not like people "fixing" problems over buying solutions.


----------



## imfree

ManBeef said:


> I've heard from a few people that the xbox to xbox360 adapters aren't very good. Unless I
> I can find one legit because they were getting them from China. I just wanted to see if I had the skill to get it to work. I failed. I'm also thinking that the wire colors for positive/negative are not the usual red && green. Meaning that they have them all mixed up. Microsoft does not like people "fixing" problems over buying solutions.



Yessir, Mr Beef, your MS=Spend Rep is in your box! Moneygrabbin'* Microsoft has kept me pissed for years!

*Hard drive fillin', resource wastin', add-on hungry bastards that they are!

They'll sell you the world's best power saw for $5, but you need a different type of blade for each type of task and blades start out at $250!


----------



## Your Plump Princess

BigBeautifulMe said:


> I'm so sorry for your loss, honey.  It seems like it happened so fast, and he was so young. Was he sick?


According to an article I found online, he drifted into on-coming traffic and hit a semi head-on. I think the sudden shock and loss is what's making it so difficult, so many unanswered questions like why he drifted, etc. He was only 27, it just shouldn't have happened, and not that way..


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

I know someone else that happened to. The person had untreated sleep apnea. I'm so sorry for his families' loss, and that of his friends. This has to be so hard.


----------



## Mathias

I found out that the boy friend of an old friend of mine from high school passed away. I'm sad because it's believed to be drug related, and mad because she has a four year old boy. We had all thought they both had gotten clean for his sake, but apparently gotten back intro drugs again. I'm just hoping she'll be alright. It's just horrible no matter how you look at it. :really sad:


----------



## Your Plump Princess

Mathias said:


> I found out that the boy friend of an old friend of mine from high school passed away. I'm sad because it's believed to be drug related, and mad because she has a four year old boy. We had all thought they both had gotten clean for his sake, but apparently gotten back intro drugs again. I'm just hoping she'll be alright. It's just horrible no matter how you look at it. :really sad:


That's awful, I hope she doesn't relapse into that lifestyle again.


----------



## ManBeef

imfree said:


> Yessir, Mr Beef, your MS=Spend Rep is in your box! Moneygrabbin'* Microsoft has kept me pissed for years!
> 
> *Hard drive fillin', resource wastin', add-on hungry bastards that they are!
> 
> They'll sell you the world's best power saw for $5, but you need a different type of blade for each type of task and blades start out at $250!



My goal is to figure it out. I have to.


----------



## Kibeth

Some jerk stood me up for dinner. it wasn't even a date. rude.


----------



## HottiMegan

I'm sad because I wish i lived closer to Michigan. I have a cousin who i'd love to be near and comfort while she's going through a really tough time. I actually have two cousins from each side of my family there i'd like to be there for.


----------



## CastingPearls

I've made the decision to bring my cat Wonton to my father's house because I don't feel she will be safe here for long. I will follow in a few weeks but I'll miss her so much while she's away because she's my little baby and I need her.


----------



## Jack Secret

I've been paralyzed for a while now so I'm fairly used to being the way I am. Today, more than usual, I wish I was able bodied. I usually don't think about it anymore. Of course I have "my days" And this is certainly one of them.


----------



## idontspeakespn

My father died two years ago yesterday.

I had a really nice day yesterday, and was quite surprised when I didn't fall apart at work, but it was okay. Sure I remembered him, constantly, but it wasn't the crushing grief I felt last year.

So it was even more of a shock when I woke up this morning feeling like he had died YESTERDAY. 

I'm sad because the only man that's ever loved me as ME is gone, and because the man I love-- whom I could really use a boat-load of tactile reassurance from--can no longer speak to me, or hold me, when I need him the most. I think that makes today worse. Is because there is no one to can soothe my grief. And the one person I want to soothe my grief, is the one who had given me a large amount of NEW grief to process. 

What. The. Fuck.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

CastingPearls said:


> I've made the decision to bring my cat Wonton to my father's house because I don't feel she will be safe here for long. I will follow in a few weeks but I'll miss her so much while she's away because she's my little baby and I need her.



I know how much you love that kitty, and how hard this will be for you, but I think that's a wise decision. So much love coming your way, honey. Three weeks, and you and Miss Won will both be loving on each other like you were never apart.


----------



## penguin

Not getting enough sleep. A resurgence of insomnia mixed with my daughter waking up at ridiculous hours of the morning means I'm running low. When this goes on for a while it brings out depressive tendencies, so this morning I'm feeling quite low and sad.


----------



## CleverBomb

HP is shutting down their phone/tablet operations. 
Which is the end of what used to be Palm, Inc. 

-Rusty
Palm Vx, Palm i705, Palm T/TX, Garmin iQue 3200, Treo 90, Treo 270, Treo 600, Treo 680.


----------



## WVMountainrear

My bed seems awfully empty and lonely tonight without him.


----------



## violetviolets

I've yet to be inspired enough to do anything with my skills in graphic design...


----------



## DeniseW

Nick Ashford passed away, he was a great songwriter and singer and him and his wife Valerie Simpson were a great team....he'll be missed


----------



## Surlysomething

DeniseW said:


> Nick Ashford passed away, he was a great songwriter and singer and him and his wife Valerie Simpson were a great team....he'll be missed


 

A huge loss for the R&B scene. What a talent.

RIP


----------



## mel

...missing...


----------



## penguin

Love songs.


----------



## SMA413

I started the process of severing ties with someone I should have cut out of my life like a tumor months ago.


It makes me feel like I'm losing a part of my life but I know it has to be done for me to move forward.


----------



## TwilightStarr

My knee is hurting really bad from walking around the state fair today and I think I am getting sick


----------



## Lamia

SMA413 said:


> I started the process of severing ties with someone I should have cut out of my life like a tumor months ago.
> 
> 
> It makes me feel like I'm losing a part of my life but I know it has to be done for me to move forward.



I've been there. It's sucks, but it is worth it to get out of a diseased relationship.


----------



## kaylaisamachine

That I am always busy with school and other things that I rarely get on Dims and post anymore. :c


----------



## Mishty

VMA's is making me sad talking about Amy Winehouse.
Breaks my heart.


----------



## *Goofy*Girl*

Mishty said:


> VMA's is making me sad talking about Amy Winehouse.
> Breaks my heart.



That makes me sad too. It's a shame to see someone so gifted & talented go away.


----------



## Fuzzy

My grandmother passed away today. She was 97. 
July 9, 1914 - Aug 28, 2011.

She had fallen recently and broken a hip. She made a quick recovery, but couldn't walk. She slipped away this morning, shortly before my father came by to visit.


----------



## Rathkhan

Fuzzy said:


> My grandmother passed away today. She was 97.
> July 9, 1914 - Aug 28, 2011.
> 
> She had fallen recently and broken a hip. She made a quick recovery, but couldn't walk. She slipped away this morning, shortly before my father came by to visit.



=\ I am sorry for your loss


----------



## shinyapple

Fuzzy said:


> My grandmother passed away today. She was 97.
> July 9, 1914 - Aug 28, 2011.
> 
> She had fallen recently and broken a hip. She made a quick recovery, but couldn't walk. She slipped away this morning, shortly before my father came by to visit.



So sorry for your loss, Fuzzy. It's never easy to let them go, even under the best of circumstances.


----------



## Surlysomething

Fuzzy said:


> My grandmother passed away today. She was 97.
> July 9, 1914 - Aug 28, 2011.
> 
> She had fallen recently and broken a hip. She made a quick recovery, but couldn't walk. She slipped away this morning, shortly before my father came by to visit.


 
Sorry for your loss, Fuzzy. She must have seen a lot in her very long life.

Take care


----------



## tonynyc

Fuzzy said:


> My grandmother passed away today. She was 97.
> July 9, 1914 - Aug 28, 2011.
> 
> She had fallen recently and broken a hip. She made a quick recovery, but couldn't walk. She slipped away this morning, shortly before my father came by to visit.



Sorry for your loss Fuzzy


----------



## CleverBomb

Fuzzy said:


> My grandmother passed away today. She was 97.
> July 9, 1914 - Aug 28, 2011.
> 
> She had fallen recently and broken a hip. She made a quick recovery, but couldn't walk. She slipped away this morning, shortly before my father came by to visit.


I'm terribly sorry for your tragic loss. 

-Rusty


----------



## imfree

You have my condolences, comforting wishes, and prayers. Grandparents are amazing people.


----------



## kaylaisamachine

I just wish I could help.. I care too much. I'm over emotional and I wish I could be there for the people I love so they could see how much I care.


----------



## littlefairywren

Fuzzy said:


> My grandmother passed away today. She was 97.
> July 9, 1914 - Aug 28, 2011.
> 
> She had fallen recently and broken a hip. She made a quick recovery, but couldn't walk. She slipped away this morning, shortly before my father came by to visit.



I am so sorry for your loss, Fuzzy.


----------



## Mathias

I don't know how else I can say this but, I'm lonely.


----------



## Fuzzy

Thanks to everybody...

At my grandmother's birthday party in July, we were asking her questions about things she could remember. (Luckily, no alzheimer's.. sharp as a tack)

Memories such as collecting raspberries all day in rural Idaho to sell for 10c a bottle. Being the 11th child of 13. Her transportation into town from the family farm was a horse named Moonie.


----------



## SarahLaughsAlot

that people with the *most* love to give have no one to give it to, and it saddens me that i'm one of them</3


----------



## imfree

SarahLaughsAlot said:


> that people with the *most* love to give have no one to give it to, and it saddens me that i'm one of them</3



We're the ones who comfort others and help them laugh, then cry in the alone of our time.

You're not alone. I wish you comfort and peace.


----------



## *Goofy*Girl*

This thread.


----------



## Diana_Prince245

One of these days I'm going to learn to not put my best posts on threads that I know will get deleted.


----------



## ThikJerseyChik

SMA413 said:


> I started the process of severing ties with someone I should have cut out of my life like a tumor months ago.
> 
> 
> It makes me feel like I'm losing a part of my life but I know it has to be done for me to move forward.



Hi Samantha - been a long time.

I carry this with me; it has helped me take care of ME. Hope it helps you.

LIFE IS A THEATER

Invite Your Audience Carefully

Not everyone is healthy enough to have a front row seat in our lives.
There are some people in your life that need to be loved from a DISTANCE.
It's amazing what you can accomplish when you let go of, or at least
minimize your time with, draining, negative, incompatible,
not-going-anywhere relationships/friendships.
Observe the relationships around you. Pay attention.

Which ones lift and which ones lean?
Which ones encourage and which ones discourage?
Which ones are on a path of growth uphill and which ones are going downhill?
When you leave certain people do you feel better or feel worse?
Which ones always have drama or don't really understand, know or appreciate you?

*The more you seek quality, respect, growth, peace of mind, love and truth around you...the easier it will become for you to decide who gets to sit in the front row and who should be moved to the balcony of Your Life.*

"If you cannot change the people around you, CHANGE the people you are around."

Remember that the people we hang with will have an impact on both our lives and our income. And so we must be careful to choose the people we hang out with, as well as the information with which we feed our minds.
We should not share our dreams with negative people, Nor feed our dreams with negative thoughts.

It's your choice and your life..... It's up to you who and what you let in it......


----------



## Heyyou

I just heard Sting's "Every Breath You Take" with the stupid Snow Patrol song, _in the same song._. DEFINITELY made me sad! And  too.


----------



## HottiMegan

It hurts my heart so bad to watch my little boy have to endure pain week after week. His surgery is STILL not healing properly. He has reactive tissue growth and needs its removal every week. He shakes in pain while they're working on him. He even screams during some of it. I just wish i could take all his hurt away. He's been through way too much in his short life. I hate that we have to go back again next week. I'm sooo booking a hotel room with a pool and hot tub for a treat as soon as he's done with all this crap. He's missed out on swimming most of the summer.


----------



## 1love_emily

It sounds so trivial compared to everyone else's issues... but I just wish my boyfriend were here to make me feel like I'm worth something.


----------



## SMA413

1love_emily said:


> It sounds so trivial compared to everyone else's issues... but I just wish my boyfriend were here to make me feel like I'm worth something.



You shouldn't have to rely on having a boyfriend to make you feel like you're worth something. That is trivial and that's what makes me sad today.


----------



## Linda

My three day holiday weekend is slowly shrinking because of the amount of work I have to get done for work. Boo!!


----------



## CastingPearls

1love_emily said:


> It sounds so trivial compared to everyone else's issues... but I just wish my boyfriend were here to make me feel like I'm worth something.


You ARE worth a lot, all by yourself. Always.


----------



## Lamia

My best friend's mom passed away and her funeral was yesterday. She was such a wonderful lady. 

I am ready for this year to be over. 

Sept 2010 my mom's best friends passes from cancer
dec 2011 my step mom's twin sister passes from cancer
Jan 2011 my best friend's dad passes from cancer
Jan 2011 my cousin passed from cancer
April My grandma passes from heart failure
April my nephew in law has hideous wreck and almost dies, but is in recovery
June 2011 couisin passes from heart failure
Aug 2011 My best friend's mom passes from diabetes/heart failure

My step mom has lost 4 siblings and a nephew this year.


----------



## Luv2BNaughty

feeling invisible..


----------



## Your Plump Princess

I came to my moms house today and I saw the damage from yesterdays storms, and we did lose a _lot_ of our beautiful old trees. There's going to be very little shade now, and mowing is going to be a biiiiiitch.


----------



## penguin

I was woken up in the middle of the night by two people arguing. I still don't know if it was an adult and child or two adults. It was horrific to listen to, as it sounded like they were being hit and things were being smashed. The victim was begging for them to listen and to stop and that they didn't do whatever it was the other person thought they did. What's worse is that I didn't know _where_ they were. There's a large park right behind my house, and sound travels really well across it from the houses on the other side. I don't know if they were in the park or in one of the houses. I called the police anyway, because it needed to stop. I don't know if the police came and that's why it eventually stopped or what, but it was so horrible to hear.


----------



## Angel

...when a woman doesn't respect other women or their relationships.

(and thank you to the women who have noticed and have been supportive. thank you for being *real* friends)


----------



## CastingPearls

More anxiety than sadness. Still haven't received confirmation yet.


----------



## littlefairywren

Angel said:


> ...when a woman doesn't respect other women or their relationships.
> 
> (and thank you to the women who have noticed and have been supportive. thank you for being *real* friends)



Uh huh...those types of women need a slap upside the head to knock some sense into their noggins. 



CastingPearls said:


> More anxiety than sadness. Still haven't received confirmation yet.



Sending wee hugs your way. You will get that confirmation soon, Lainey, and then you can start to breath easier.


----------



## snuggletiger

penguin said:


> I was woken up in the middle of the night by two people arguing. I still don't know if it was an adult and child or two adults. It was horrific to listen to, as it sounded like they were being hit and things were being smashed. The victim was begging for them to listen and to stop and that they didn't do whatever it was the other person thought they did. What's worse is that I didn't know _where_ they were. There's a large park right behind my house, and sound travels really well across it from the houses on the other side. I don't know if they were in the park or in one of the houses. I called the police anyway, because it needed to stop. I don't know if the police came and that's why it eventually stopped or what, but it was so horrible to hear.



Sorry you had to hear that  That is very sad indeed.


----------



## one2one

penguin said:


> I was woken up in the middle of the night by two people arguing. I still don't know if it was an adult and child or two adults. It was horrific to listen to, as it sounded like they were being hit and things were being smashed. The victim was begging for them to listen and to stop and that they didn't do whatever it was the other person thought they did. What's worse is that I didn't know _where_ they were. There's a large park right behind my house, and sound travels really well across it from the houses on the other side. I don't know if they were in the park or in one of the houses. I called the police anyway, because it needed to stop. I don't know if the police came and that's why it eventually stopped or what, but it was so horrible to hear.



Edit: Never mind ... I'm just going to PM you instead.


----------



## GentleSavage

A few things are making me sad right now. 

I just graduated, and as such I am now super far from a lot of my friends, and it sucks seeing them so rarely, or not at all. 

Also I have no job, and no plans to go back to school for another year, so I am kind of stuck in some stupid limbo of absolute nothingness. 

Generally I am just feeling really lonely. It wasn't so bad before, but this summer I've been on a few dates and nothing really panned out, and that kind of made it worse.

Oh well. At least Doctor Who is on tonight.


----------



## *Goofy*Girl*

My exhaustion. I don't even feel like going out tonight.


----------



## rockhound225

That my money is stretched so thin and there is still so much that has to be taken care of...


----------



## joemurphy

The closed mindedness and intolerance of ideas other than their own in a growing number of young people.


----------



## s!gma

I hate how Shy I am.
I drove downtown tonight to go to a party and i got there, paid for parking and then I just couldn't go. 

I used to be the loudest guy who would introduce myself with arrogant confident bullcrap. Now I cant get myself to hang out with my friends, because all I do is worry.

It comes from the fact that I always feel like a burden on the people around me, family, friends, etc. whether or not its true I will restrict myself from calling or hanging out with my friends and cousins just because I think I'm a bad influence and I'll bring them down.

Its why I never approach anyone I don't already know. I assume every woman is tired of strangers walking up and striking a conversation, so I never do. Even if she smiles at me first I never act because I always have the itching feeling that I'm going to ruin your life.

Lonely and shy are a terrible combination.

My problems are so inconsequential compared to a lot of the things I am seeing, Sorry to even do this, this is even hard to write because I feel like I am pushing my problems off onto others, I just had to get this off my chest, I don't really have anyone I can talk to about this crap.


----------



## Gingembre

s!gma said:


> I hate how Shy I am.
> I drove downtown tonight to go to a party and i got there, paid for parking and then I just couldn't go.
> 
> I used to be the loudest guy who would introduce myself with arrogant confident bullcrap. Now I cant get myself to hang out with my friends, because all I do is worry.
> 
> It comes from the fact that I always feel like a burden on the people around me, family, friends, etc. whether or not its true I will restrict myself from calling or hanging out with my friends and cousins just because I think I'm a bad influence and I'll bring them down.
> 
> Its why I never approach anyone I don't already know. I assume every woman is tired of strangers walking up and striking a conversation, so I never do. Even if she smiles at me first I never act because I always have the itching feeling that I'm going to ruin your life.
> 
> Lonely and shy are a terrible combination.
> 
> My problems are so inconsequential compared to a lot of the things I am seeing, Sorry to even do this, this is even hard to write because I feel like I am pushing my problems off onto others, I just had to get this off my chest, I don't really have anyone I can talk to about this crap.



((hugs)) This made me really sad to read, because I used to be a bit like this myself. Still am if I don't force myself to get out there and do things.

Please find someone to talk to about this? A friend? A therapist? I'm sure none of the negative things you think about yourself are true. What made you change from the overconfident guy you used to be?


----------



## Hathor

I'm sad and disheartened that I've fallen for a man who is incapable of giving me any sort of love and affection (kissing and hugging)....as those are my basic needs to feel like someone's girl.


----------



## Heyyou

I am scared, i cannot find my wallet. I had ~$90 cash and all the thing si need ot start my job today (ID and SS Card) in it. I am truly worried because i think i had it in my bathing suit yesterday while riding my bike for an hour.

Pray.... for...... me.......... im about to go through my room a thrd time.

Anything........ but.... this.. i will find it... i have to...........................................................

I even just retraced my track on the beach. The boardwalk stairs, too. Didnt see it.....................................................................


----------



## mimosa

Just said a prayer for you. I hope you find your wallet. 




Heyyou said:


> I am scared, i cannot find my wallet. I had ~$90 cash and all the thing si need ot start my job today (ID and SS Card) in it. I am truly worried because i think i had it in my bathing suit yesterday while riding my bike for an hour.
> 
> Pray.... for...... me.......... im about to go through my room a thrd time.
> 
> Anything........ but.... this.. i will find it... i have to...........................................................
> 
> I even just retraced my track on the beach. The boardwalk stairs, too. Didnt see it.....................................................................


----------



## Heyyou

mimosa said:


> Just said a prayer for you. I hope you find your wallet.



TY! With that, i will resume my search.


----------



## mimosa

Welcome. Go in faith, Heyyou. It will happen for you. 



Heyyou said:


> TY! With that, i will resume my search.


----------



## snuggletiger

I forgot my wallet too but know exactly where it is provided my house doesn't eat it.


----------



## Heyyou

snuggletiger said:


> I forgot my wallet too but know exactly where it is provided my house doesn't eat it.



Im starting to think the roaches got it. They have violated our understanding! lol

Im trying to take a break from looking for it like im the DEA right now (and i am good at flipping over couches like i am the DEA.) It will turn up. Its here. I feel its energy.

(Lets just put it this way: My job is in that wallet, since its ID and SS# card.)

IC im trying to relax, i will post when it turns up. It hasnt yet.


----------



## snuggletiger

Try going through the pockets of the clothes you last wore when you had the wallet. 9/10 times it'll be there


----------



## mimosa

I work very hard at staying positive. But there are times when I just feel plain awful like right now. My soon to be ex husband is just terrible and disrespectful. There is so much I can say about him, but I don't have the energy. I want to feel whole again. I am trying to put the pieces of my life back together. It's a challenge. Please say a prayer for me. xoxoxo


----------



## imfree

mimosa said:


> I work very hard at staying positive. But there are times when I just feel plain awful like right now. My soon to be ex husband is just terrible and disrespectful. There is so much I can say about him, but I don't have the energy. I want to feel whole again. I am trying to put the pieces of my life back together. It's a challenge. Please say a prayer for me. xoxoxo



I'm not alone in sending you my best thoughts, wishes, and prayers for comfort and peace. May the Lord lift you up.


----------



## imfree

Some records were never meant to be broken. A prime example is this irreplaceable 78 RPM, 4 Record Set of Christmas Songs by Mario Lanza, one of the top 5 greatest tenors of all time, that was destroyed in shipment to me. 78's are made of shellac, as shellac pre-dates vinyl and is very brittle 

View attachment Mario Lanza destroyed records wb lg.jpg


----------



## mimosa

imfree said:


> I'm not alone in sending you my best thoughts, wishes, and prayers for comfort and peace. May the Lord lift you up.



Thanks, imfree. You're the best. God bless you.


----------



## moore2me

imfree said:


> Some records were never meant to be broken. A prime example is this irreplaceable 78 RPM, 4 Record Set of Christmas Songs by Mario Lanza, one of the top 5 greatest tenors of all time, that was destroyed in shipment to me. 78's are made of shellac, as shellac pre-dates vinyl and is very brittle



Edgar,
I agree with you Mario Lanza has the voice of an angel. He is one of my favorite male singers. I feel your pain. To help console you, person you can retrieve a few valuable digital recording from some of the websites I collected for you. (You might also ask if anyone has a copy of the lost collection of Christmas albums.)

http://www.mariolanzatenor.com/

http://historyofthetenor.com/page.php?87

http://www.mario-lanza-institute.org/

http://www.operaclubdeparis-mariolanza.fr/

http://www.bmls.co.uk/


----------



## imfree

moore2me said:


> Edgar,
> I agree with you Mario Lanza has the voice of an angel. He is one of my favorite male singers. I feel your pain. To help console you, person you can retrieve a few valuable digital recording from some of the websites I collected for you. (You might also ask if anyone has a copy of the lost collection of Christmas albums.)
> 
> http://www.mariolanzatenor.com/
> 
> http://historyofthetenor.com/page.php?87
> 
> http://www.mario-lanza-institute.org/
> 
> http://www.operaclubdeparis-mariolanza.fr/
> 
> http://www.bmls.co.uk/



Thanks, M2M! I won't have too much trouble getting over the loss of those records, as the seller has already fully refunded and your links are helpful, too. I'm already working on another 78 to play on my Deccollaro in the upcoming DimmerLand Christmas video. Things are looking up for the project.


----------



## Shosh

My cousin's battle with breast cancer. She just had a bi lateral mastectomy.
She is only 45 years old.


----------



## Aust99

My Mum had to take our dog to be put down today.... she was 16 years old and it was her time to go. She had a great life but it's always horrible when you lose a dear pet....
View attachment 97122


----------



## spiritangel

Shosh said:


> My cousin's battle with breast cancer. She just had a bi lateral mastectomy.
> She is only 45 years old.



so so very sorry to hear this shosh big squishy hugs.



Aust99 said:


> My Mum had to take our dog to be put down today.... she was 16 years old and it was her time to go. She had a great life but it's always horrible when you lose a dear pet....
> View attachment 97122



aww so sorry to hear about losing a family member ( pets count as that in my books) lots of hugs


mine feels kinda selfish now just seeing the pic I took of him thats his profile pic pop up on my friends list or on fb.


----------



## Heyyou

That some people just dont get it.


----------



## Kamily

Lots of stuff. Way too much to mention and nobody wants to hear me moan and bitch anyways. 

Im waiting on the weekend to get here so I can drown all of my sorrow and frustration in a pitcher or two of alcohol. Yes I realize it doesnt help matters, but at least I can get them off my mind for a couple hours.


----------



## Lovelyone

Shosh said:


> My cousin's battle with breast cancer. She just had a bi lateral mastectomy.
> She is only 45 years old.



I totally empathize with this. My sister is almost 43 and is in her second set of radiation treatments. The doctors have asked her to make a decision about a mastectomy before this set of treatments is over. She can have one breast removed with a prosthesis, one removed with reconstruction surgery or a bi-lateral with reconstruction (which is what her doctors are suggesting). What a hard decision to make. On top of this she is having kidney failure. I pray for your cousin and my sister.


----------



## moore2me

Shosh said:


> My cousin's battle with breast cancer. She just had a bi lateral mastectomy.
> She is only 45 years old.



Dear Shosh, Yes, it is very sad when a young woman suffers from breast cancer. Plus, her battle is just starting too. I am sure you will be there to help and give her a shoulder to lean on. Is she a blood relative? If so, you may also be at greater risk. (See below.)



Lovelyone said:


> I totally empathize with this. My sister is almost 43 and is in her second set of radiation treatments. The doctors have asked her to make a decision about a mastectomy before this set of treatments is over. She can have one breast removed with a prosthesis, one removed with reconstruction surgery or a bi-lateral with reconstruction (which is what her doctors are suggesting). What a hard decision to make. On top of this she is having kidney failure. I pray for your cousin and my sister.



Lovelyone, I am also sorry to hear of your sister's cancer and kidney failure. Having to decide about what kind of breast surgery has got to be a horrible decision for a woman in her 40's. Perhaps she is talking to some women in a support group that have been thru similar cancers and therapies. Plus, you should also have yourself checked closely because you are in a high risk category now that a sister has developed bilateral breast cancer early in life. 
The kidney failure could also be a "fly in the ointment" and may change the doctor's recommendation if she has to go on full dialysis or a kidney transplant list.





Kamily said:


> Lots of stuff. Way too much to mention and nobody wants to hear me moan and bitch anyways.
> 
> Im waiting on the weekend to get here so I can drown all of my sorrow and frustration in a pitcher or two of alcohol. Yes I realize it doesnt help matters, but at least I can get them off my mind for a couple hours.


I hate to be a wet blanket, but since I am writing about breast cancer, the Mayo Clinic is recommending an average of no more than one or so alcohol drink a day for women to reduce the risk of breast cancer. I normally would nit pick on anyones weekend party, but a pitcher or two of alcohol would equal about how many glasses? 5 or 6? 

(Now if you really meant a pitcher or two of straight drinking alcohol, it would be lethal that night.)

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/breast-cancer-prevention/WO00091



Aust99 said:


> My Mum had to take our dog to be put down today.... she was 16 years old and it was her time to go. She had a great life but it's always horrible when you lose a dear pet....
> View attachment 97122


 Sorry about your pup. I am sure she was a good dog and you and your mom made her life very happy.



Heyyou said:


> That some people just dont get it.


Unfortunately, you will find few people that understand you. You will have to understand them.


----------



## CAMellie

Just when I start to think that I'm getting a grip on my grief...it hits me in the chest like a sledgehammer. I miss my momma.


----------



## Heyyou

And NOW the hosemates wake up and want to know WHY i didnt "say anything" abotu the water. (MAYBE BECUSE YALL STOLE MY WALLET, MF-ERS!!)

Look look i know that im trying to reign in my posting and i will, and that ive perhaps insulted (without meaning to) some posters and i know some posters sort of have a lot of fun at my expense (just accept it, i know, i cant change the actions of others) and that a LOT of my intentions get misconstrued and joked about and all these things from the past week when all started to kick up. But now, im.. too worried. I mean the living room has water and flooded it seems it was due to the toilet (?) and all i can think about is that my interaction with these people has changed, since yall know what, by now.

Its 6:04AM and i need to be more aware of how other people percieve me (some of yall have some interesting and colorful things to say about me, im sorry to hear, im still stunned at some of the things yall suggest and actually do think sometimes but then again i can -somewhat- key word -somewhat- see how i bring that on, i hope in time the perception will change thats my goal) and its good an event like this happened because now i can reevaulate "living with thieves in Florida with my house flooding and they caring about "why didnt i say anything." because i want you to drown, buttholes..)

Out. Later.


----------



## Heyyou

And NOW the hosemates wake up and want to know WHY i didnt "say anything" abotu the water. (MAYBE BECUSE YALL STOLE MY WALLET, MF-ERS!!)

Look look i know that im trying to reign in my posting and i will, and that ive perhaps insulted (without meaning to) some posters and i know some posters sort of have a lot of fun at my expense (just accept it, i know, i cant change the actions of others) and that a LOT of my intentions get misconstrued and joked about and all these things from the past week when all started to kick up. But now, im.. too worried. I mean the living room has water and flooded it seems it was due to the toilet (?) and all i can think about is that my interaction with these people has changed, since yall know what, by now.

Its 6:04AM and i need to be more aware of how other people percieve me (some of yall have some interesting and colorful things to say about me, im sorry to hear, im still stunned at some of the things yall suggest and actually do think sometimes but then again i can -somewhat- key word -somewhat- see how i bring that on, i hope in time the perception will change thats my goal) and its good an event like this happened because now i can reevaulate "living with thieves in Florida with my house flooding and they caring about "why didnt i say anything." because i want you to drown, buttholes..)

Classic Aspergers, now im just kind of outside being quiet and they are all like "Why didnt you say or do anything." Im sure some that jest over me will think i was trying to find out hos much they weigh. Lol? Well, thats my attempt at a joke for today.

Today is a new day. Woo-hoo.

Out. Later. Ty.

Oh, and for all those wondering... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pltwnSMR8yU 

I apoligize for anyone offended at my post, though i tried to make it unoffensive, and even include a joke!. Today will be a day of light posting. Thats my focus... because ive earned a reputation and sentiment, and im totally down for the long road to getting better, FWIW.

Ok got to work on this, thanks.


----------



## spiritangel

friends keep asking me what happened with Isaac and I just dont have the answers or the heart to talk about it


----------



## Lovelyone

Lovelyone said:


> I totally empathize with this. My sister is almost 43 and is in her second set of radiation treatments. The doctors have asked her to make a decision about a mastectomy before this set of treatments is over. She can have one breast removed with a prosthesis, one removed with reconstruction surgery or a bi-lateral with reconstruction (which is what her doctors are suggesting). What a hard decision to make. On top of this she is having kidney failure. I pray for your cousin and my sister.



My sister has been having issues with her kidneys for the past three weeks. The docs decided it was her Chemo that was affecting her kidneys and so they switched some of her meds. She was scheduled for some testing yesterday to find out what is going on but her kidneys were so bad that they kept her overnight last night (and possibly for tonight too). I am happy that she's being well taken care of,gets a few days rest from her children and the everyday aspects of life...but I am still very concerned about her health and I miss her. She's my best friend.


----------



## Mishty

My ignorance. I just watched The Kite Runner and Turtles Can Fly, and my lack of knowledge about some cultures shames me.


----------



## littlefairywren

My childhood coming back to haunt me.


----------



## SMA413

There's a high probability that I'll be hungover in the AM. No bueno.


----------



## Lamia

I went out for my birthday tonight and had a great time. At the bar was a guy who made my life a living hell in high school. He made fun of me almost every day. He was at the bar alone and just kind of sat in a corner by himself. It was kind of sad and I felt bad for him. So remember karma is a harsh bitch.


----------



## spiritangel

I have adorable pigtails and bows in my hair and no one to share them with


----------



## Gingembre

Mishty said:


> My ignorance. I just watched The Kite Runner and Turtles Can Fly, and my lack of knowledge about some cultures shames me.



If you haven't already, read The Kite Runner. It's SO much better than the film, and a lot more detailed.


----------



## *Goofy*Girl*

littlefairywren said:


> My childhood coming back to haunt me.



Oh, I hate when that happens.  Taking a Klonopin & going to bed helps.


----------



## J34

So I spent nearly $700 fixing my car these past couple weeks then everything was fine and all of a sudden it doesn't turn on. It might be a parasitic drain on the battery or maybe a bad alternator. Either way I am not happy to spend more money on fixing it  since I am quite broke


----------



## disconnectedsmile

i can no longer safely express my feelings


----------



## nettie

MS. Another cousin diagnosed.


----------



## littlefairywren

nettie said:


> MS. Another cousin diagnosed.



Hugs ..........


----------



## nettie

littlefairywren said:


> Hugs ..........



Thanks, LFW.


----------



## Lamia

My cousin's husband just passed away today. They have a 16 year old son. I am so sad for them. My best friend's mom passed away earlier this month. I am so sick of funerals. This will be the 7th one this year. I am ready for this fucking year to be over.


----------



## CAMellie

Missing my momma something fierce right now


----------



## firefly

Having new neighbours is ... kind of stressful. I want to grab my house with its garden and move it to a nice and peaceful lakeside on a large-enough-lake without any people around who I didn't invite to be there!


----------



## Linda

Silence. I want to hear laughter, chitter chatter, breathing, snoring, anything....something.


----------



## Mathias

Steve Jobs died today. R.I.P. :really sad:


----------



## Webmaster

Very, very sad about Steve.


----------



## ScreamingChicken

Not so much sad but ticked at Yahoo Messenger. It doesn't recognize me but I can log in to my email and access it from there (which I don't lcare for too much). Anyone care to help?


----------



## AnnMarie

Webmaster said:


> Very, very sad about Steve.



Conrad beat me to it.


----------



## shinyapple

We adopted a dog on Monday evening. He's a sweet little chihuahua, about three years old. He's very underweight (maybe five pounds at most) and super lovey...and we can take care of both those needs. I adore him already and he's decided I'm his favorite person. We went to get him a friend today and when the vet was walking through, she heard him sneeze. Apparently our little guy came to us with a bad case of kennel cough  We have meds for him and he'll feel better soon, but he sounds so much worse tonight. It's breaking my heart every time he wheezes or coughs. I wish FMLA applied to pets and I'd take the day off to keep an eye on him, but checking on him at lunch will have to do.

Feel better soon, little guy!


----------



## spiritangel

That friends keep feeling the need to confess that they never really liked my ex and suspected it would end this way

it would be ok if they diddnt already know that HONESTY is one of the things I value highly and it is making me have to rehash stuff that is better left dead and burried its done over move on I have


----------



## CleverBomb

shinyapple said:


> We adopted a dog on Monday evening. He's a sweet little chihuahua, about three years old. He's very underweight (maybe five pounds at most) and super lovey...and we can take care of both those needs. I adore him already and he's decided I'm his favorite person. We went to get him a friend today and when the vet was walking through, she heard him sneeze. Apparently our little guy came to us with a bad case of kennel cough  We have meds for him and he'll feel better soon, but he sounds so much worse tonight. It's breaking my heart every time he wheezes or coughs. I wish FMLA applied to pets and I'd take the day off to keep an eye on him, but checking on him at lunch will have to do.
> 
> Feel better soon, little guy!


Awww... best wishes to the pup -- he'll be fine, and now he's got a family!

-Rusty


----------



## Surlysomething

spiritangel said:


> That friends keep feeling the need to confess that they never really liked my ex and suspected it would end this way
> 
> it would be ok if they diddnt already know that HONESTY is one of the things I value highly and it is making me have to rehash stuff that is better left dead and burried its done over move on I have


 

That's why it's better to keep your online relationships somewhat private. Then people can't voice their opinions on it either way.


----------



## idontspeakespn

So my world just broke apart a little bit: 

My son (not really my son but my ex-housemate who is like family) just told me he's moving to Sheffield...transferring to the university there. Says its a better school for him. He was my only friend left near me, as all others have gone back to their respective countries and now he's leaving...next. week. Dropped that bombshell on me about 5 minutes ago. No warning, nothing. 

And, as much as I hate to admit it, I really do feel like I'm losing a bit of the only family I had here. I know Sheffield's not a huge distance or anything, but...when Ranjeet leaves, I'll be alone here. I have aquaintences at work who are friendly, but...it's not the same as the real love and friendship I had with Ranjeet, or any of the other friends I had here. 

It is really quite sad. I'm crying, and I never cry!


----------



## Micara

I've been really down in the dumps this week.

My mom, daughter, and brother are off on a cruise that I stupidly decided not to go on so that I could save up my vacation time. I had dinners scheduled with my friends all week to keep me entertained. As it turns out, I ended up getting sick with a sinus infection and bronchitis on Sunday, and I've had to use up all my personal/credit/and now annual time taking off work to stay home and feel crappy. And I had to cancel all my dinners. Being sick is bad enough, but being sick, lonely, and out of vacation time is even worse.


----------



## Donna

shinyapple said:


> We adopted a dog on Monday evening. He's a sweet little chihuahua, about three years old. He's very underweight (maybe five pounds at most) and super lovey...and we can take care of both those needs. I adore him already and he's decided I'm his favorite person. We went to get him a friend today and when the vet was walking through, she heard him sneeze. Apparently our little guy came to us with a bad case of kennel cough  We have meds for him and he'll feel better soon, but he sounds so much worse tonight. It's breaking my heart every time he wheezes or coughs. I wish FMLA applied to pets and I'd take the day off to keep an eye on him, but checking on him at lunch will have to do.
> 
> Feel better soon, little guy!



Aww, bless his little heart. With the meds, the kennel cough should heal up pretty quick. Hope he feels better soon.

Often when excited, chihuahuas will make a wheezing sound that will freak you out. (Well, it did freak me out when my chihuahua started wheezing for no aparent reason.) Because they have been bred to be so small, sometimes their little tracheas collapse and they wheeze in an effort to get it to open back up. I hold mine close, stroke her ears (or whatever calming action you and your dog are familiar with) and then plug her nose. This forces her to open her mouth and take a gulp of air through her mouth which will open her trachea back up. 

Good luck with your new little addition. Post pics please in the Rep your Pets thread.


----------



## Lamia

Micara said:


> I've been really down in the dumps this week.
> 
> My mom, daughter, and brother are off on a cruise that I stupidly decided not to go on so that I could save up my vacation time. I had dinners scheduled with my friends all week to keep me entertained. As it turns out, I ended up getting sick with a sinus infection and bronchitis on Sunday, and I've had to use up all my personal/credit/and now annual time taking off work to stay home and feel crappy. And I had to cancel all my dinners. Being sick is bad enough, but being sick, lonely, and out of vacation time is even worse.



that blows sorry to hear that.


----------



## spiritangel

Micara said:


> I've been really down in the dumps this week.
> 
> My mom, daughter, and brother are off on a cruise that I stupidly decided not to go on so that I could save up my vacation time. I had dinners scheduled with my friends all week to keep me entertained. As it turns out, I ended up getting sick with a sinus infection and bronchitis on Sunday, and I've had to use up all my personal/credit/and now annual time taking off work to stay home and feel crappy. And I had to cancel all my dinners. Being sick is bad enough, but being sick, lonely, and out of vacation time is even worse.



Hugs Micara that totally sux


----------



## The Orange Mage

"Bad" dreams all week, leaving my waking self in a serious funk.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

The videos of all the police brutality going on in that protest over at Wallstreet. :really sad:


----------



## *Goofy*Girl*

firefly said:


> Having new neighbours is ... kind of stressful. I want to grab my house with its garden and move it to a nice and peaceful lakeside on a large-enough-lake without any people around who I didn't invite to be there!




I know what you mean. That's why I have to sleep with earplugs.

I still feel a little crappy from my flu shot.


----------



## spiritangel

that my birthday money is like running out already trying to make it stretch as far as I can but might have to forgo going anywhere on the day in favour of things I need


----------



## Saoirse

I hadn't heard from a friend of mine in a few weeks. it was like he just disappeared. i was a little worried, but no one else was so I figured he was ok. found out a few days ago (from him, thankfully!) that he was violently attacked one morning and ended up having emergency surgery. he's spent the last few weeks quietly recovering. he said when he's feeling better, we can get together.

i woke up crying early this morning, thinking about losing a friend like that. ive never had to deal with the death of a close friend. i wondered what it wouldve happened if he hadnt gotten to the hospital in time, what would life be like without him? or any one of my friends? it was terrible depressing. so i sent him a message saying im so grateful that hes alive and im happy to be able to call him a friend. that made me feel much better.


----------



## Scorsese86

I just got terrible news: a friend of mine, who also is the the granddaughter of my godparents, just lost her baby.
She was so happy she had gotten pregnant, and was really looking forward to becoming a mother, and now this terrible thing happened. It's awful.


----------



## ThikJerseyChik

Scorsese86 said:


> I just got terrible news: a friend of mine, who also is the the granddaughter of my godparents, just lost her baby.
> She was so happy she had gotten pregnant, and was really looking forward to becoming a mother, and now this terrible thing happened. It's awful.



((((((Scor)))))))) Losing a baby is a devastating ordeal. Prayers for your friend and her family.


----------



## Diana_Prince245

My friend's Army Ranger son has to have his chest tube reimplanted. His lung recollapsed. Looks like they pulled it too soon before.

Plus side is his graft and the donor site is healing beautifully and they were finally able to do the liver surgery.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

My brother wants to go do haunted houses and stuff, but his mother told him "No, I'm allowing you to go Trick Or Treating for the very first time, and only because that's the good side of Halloween. I'm not going to let you go to some place where they glorify the evil part of it." 

Ugh, my heart bleeds with ache for that child.


----------



## Lovelyone

It's making me sad that someone whom I love is totally unaware that they are the reason that their child is ill mannered, vulgar and uncouth. TOTALLY OBLIVIOUS. 
Every bad action that their child takes is the fault of someone else. Sad.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Scorsese86 said:


> I just got terrible news: a friend of mine, who also is the the granddaughter of my godparents, just lost her baby.
> She was so happy she had gotten pregnant, and was really looking forward to becoming a mother, and now this terrible thing happened. It's awful.


That is so completely terrible. I am so sorry.


----------



## ButlerGirl09

Feeling bummed because I got stood up tonight. Luckily I wasn't out in public waiting for him though because that would have been much worse. He explained and apologized, but I'm still feeling pretty crummy.


----------



## spiritangel

that my sister took the girls to the austar carnival in town had time to go to that and do other stuff but could not even stop by for 5 minutes afterwards to give me a birthday card or say happy birthday


----------



## Blackjack

Once again, I fucked up a good thing by not interacting enough.


----------



## Ash

Blackjack said:


> Once again, I fucked up a good thing by not interacting enough.



Now go forth and tell your story. Be a cautionary tale for all guys that do this. 

And, you know, stop doing it. Interacting is so easy, takes up so little of your time, and means so, so much. You'd be shocked how little effort it takes to sustain a good thing.


----------



## imfree

Scorsese86 said:


> I just got terrible news: a friend of mine, who also is the the granddaughter of my godparents, just lost her baby.
> She was so happy she had gotten pregnant, and was really looking forward to becoming a mother, and now this terrible thing happened. It's awful.



That is heart breaking news, Scorsese. My healing wishes and prayers are with your friend. The most empathic men of this world can hardly even begin to comprehend the pain and devastation a woman feels in miscarriage.


----------



## Aust99

My puppies got their 3rd and final immunisation today and one of them had the most shocking reaction to the added immunisation in the final dose. Her face swelled up in a matter of minutes from getting home and it was the scariest hour of my life while I rushed her to the vet for an antihistamine and cortisone needle. It's now 5 hours after returning home for a second time and she is finally looking like herself again. SCARY for a first time Mum like me.


----------



## JMCGB

Aust99 said:


> My puppies got their 3rd and final immunisation today and one of them had the most shocking reaction to the added immunisation in the final dose. Her face swelled up in a matter of minutes from getting home and it was the scariest hour of my life while I rushed her to the vet for an antihistamine and cortisone needle. It's now 5 hours after returning home for a second time and she is finally looking like herself again. SCARY for a first time Mum like me.



Scary indeed. Glad she is feeling well again. I have never had a problem with shots but Haley did have seizures. They said she epileptic but she never got worse, actually got better so I don't know what the problem was. I do know the first time she had one I FREAKED OUT!


----------



## Saoirse

today we sent sweet Bonnie Jean on to her next life. She gave my family 13 years of loyalty and companionship. :wubu:


----------



## Linda

Saoirse said:


> today we sent sweet Bonnie Jean on to her next life. She gave my family 13 years of loyalty and companionship. :wubu:




(((((((((( Hugs ))))))))))


----------



## Saoirse

Linda said:


> (((((((((( Hugs ))))))))))



thank you  Hardest thing Ive ever been through. She wasn't a pet, she was a family member and I often referred to her as my sister. Dad said many times that he would marry her if it was legal... and he MEANT it!


----------



## JMCGB

My Haley would have been 12 today. Couple more weeks until the 1 yr anniversary of having to send her to Rainbow Bridge! Miss her more than anything!!!


----------



## Heyyou

Gotta wait for tomorrow to use the rail pass i bought to go to work. Now im at best breaking even with normal cost. 

I hope they send me out, I need to work.


----------



## imfree

I tried to fire my Repper and it had no mo Reppmo!!!


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Saoirse said:


> thank you  Hardest thing Ive ever been through. She wasn't a pet, she was a family member and I often referred to her as my sister. Dad said many times that he would marry her if it was legal... and he MEANT it!


Heartbreaking.  I'm so sorry for your loss.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

JMCGB said:


> My Haley would have been 12 today. Couple more weeks until the 1 yr anniversary of having to send her to Rainbow Bridge! Miss her more than anything!!!



Sorry, J.  I hope you make it through these next couple of weeks as painlessly as possible.


----------



## Heyyou

Never thought i would hear my Mom and sister having "girls night in." Its.. wow. Talking about people in movies and Ashton Kutcher. I *LIKE* Ashton, at least some of his stuff since im not into showbiz.. and they kind of have annoying voices. I mean, wtf is your *problem* "Mom and Cristina!" Bad enough that Cristina.. well i really dont like my sister. And she flaunts her wealth and butt in my face. And she likes it. Screw that!

Im going upstairs to play with the cats, i was gonna try to get used to staying up nights, but screw this. Goodnight! (TV is occupied by female forces.)

Yeah i cant take another minute of this MST3K commntary from _them._ Ill ask them to turn it down.


----------



## CleverBomb

They're finally discontinuing the Ford Ranger, without replacing it in the lineup.

I sometimes miss my green '93 STX standard-cab 5-speed.

-Rusty


----------



## HottiMegan

My little guy Alex is sick. He's got what i have. He walks around like a zombie and just looks miserable. He was crying in his sleep a few times last night. It's a virus so the doctor is useless. (We went last week for Max so i know what we're in for) I feel for him. I want my boy back to his happy, playful self.


----------



## Allie Cat

I turned 27 today. BEST BIRTHDAY EVER.


----------



## Heyyou

OWWW just burned my mouth on HOT FOOD!



And my sister and Mom are cackling like f**ing MORONS about the dog. Wow! StfU, Sis! Stop encouraging my Mom with stupid conversation!!!


----------



## WVMountainrear

In trying to open a line of communication last night, I ended up hurting the feelings of the last person on the planet I'd ever want to hurt because I went about it in such a...stupid...way. I'm feeling pretty shitty right now.


----------



## mimosa

My Mom's most beloved sister passed away today. She had just gotten back from visiting her in Mexico. Now she has to return.


----------



## mimosa

lovelylady78 said:


> In trying to open a line of communication last night, I ended up hurting the feelings of the last person on the planet I'd ever want to hurt because I went about it in such a...stupid...way. I'm feeling pretty shitty right now.



Love will find a way, darling. Hugs.


----------



## BBWbonnie

How about what makes me angryyyy?

Maybe I am over reacting but I feel very annoyed that a person I have been speaking to via email for a very short time about nothing important, just assumes I will want to go round his and watch films

Am I over reacting? 

I think this man assumes that I am desperate


----------



## Heyyou

lovelylady78 said:


> In trying to open a line of communication last night, I ended up hurting the feelings of the last person on the planet I'd ever want to hurt because I went about it in such a...stupid...way. I'm feeling pretty shitty right now.



I pray for you and the situation, LL78. Im sorry to hear. 



mimosa said:


> *My Mom's most beloved sister passed away today.* She had just gotten back from visiting her in Mexico. Now she has to return.



 >< (hug, not big grin smiley... Hug is > then : then D then < in messenger) She is with the angels now. You know that too, right mimosa? Sorry to hear. 

My two great friends, LL78 and Mimosa. Ill pray for you both. 'Tis the least i can do. But i will do it fervently!


----------



## mimosa

Heyyou said:


> I pray for you and the situation, LL78. Im sorry to hear.
> 
> 
> 
> >< (hug, not big grin smiley... Hug is > then : then D then < in messenger) She is with the angels now. You know that too, right mimosa? Sorry to hear.
> 
> My two great friends, LL78 and Mimosa. Ill pray for you both. 'Tis the least i can do. But i will do it fervently!



Thank you sweetheart. God bless you. XOOX


----------



## SSBBW Katerina

because of the nasty, snarky attitude of a so-called friend. Yet when I go back at him in defense of his bs, he's got the audacity to turn bitchy and gets really cruel. I'm so done w/ this douchebag. I don't care how much he's done for me and has helped me transition and adjust to my move to Ohio in more ways than anyone could've, it doesn't entitle him to treat me like dirt.

"With 'friends' like this............"


----------



## Heyyou

This car makes me sad, its SOO ugly. (The model looks kind of mean and fresh out of a crypt, too.)

I hope it isnt a real car, rather a concept that looks cool but wont be made. NYC Internation Auto Show is in April or May. I cant wait!


----------



## Allie Cat

Heyyou said:


> This car makes me sad, its SOO ugly. (The model looks kind of mean and fresh out of a crypt, too.)
> 
> I hope it isnt a real car, rather a concept that looks cool but wont be made. NYC Internation Auto Show is in April or May. I cant wait!



Whoa... that is a sweet-looking car. Kinda reminds me of the Batmobile!


----------



## WVMountainrear

I literally just found out within the last 15 minutes that my uncle is in the hospital having had a stroke and one of my high school classmates passed away unexpectedly this morning.


----------



## CastingPearls

lovelylady78 said:


> I literally just found out within the last 15 minutes that my uncle is in the hospital having had a stroke and one of my high school classmates passed away unexpectedly this morning.


I'm so sorry about your friend and will be sending positive healing vibes for your uncle. Hugs.


----------



## Heyyou

lovelylady78 said:


> I literally just found out within the last 15 minutes that my uncle is in the hospital having had a stroke and one of my high school classmates passed away unexpectedly this morning.



Prayers for you. Honestly. Stay strong, Cheryl/LL78.  (I will post to express my sympathies and best wishes.)


----------



## KittyKitten

Heyyou said:


> This car makes me sad, its SOO ugly. (The model looks kind of mean and fresh out of a crypt, too.)
> 
> I hope it isnt a real car, rather a concept that looks cool but wont be made. NYC Internation Auto Show is in April or May. I cant wait!



It sure makes me sad............sad that I can't have it!


----------



## WVMountainrear

CastingPearls said:


> I'm so sorry about your friend and will be sending positive healing vibes for your uncle. Hugs.





Heyyou said:


> Prayers for you. Honestly. Stay strong, Cheryl/LL78.  (I will post to express my sympathies and best wishes.)



Thank you both.


----------



## That Guy You Met Once

Yesterday was my 21st birthday. I went to a local goth club to celebrate.

However, I didn't have enough to affect my memory, so I've been thinking about last night a lot.

Staggering outside after five drinks, I ran into a guy I knew only as J.R. Slightly notable because he was one of the five or six black people Id ever seen at a goth club, and because he owned the same hat as me, but besides that, just another face in the crowd. 

He took me aside and told me he needed to run in and get his two roommates so they could get home, because they'd had enough for one night. But before he went in, he urged me to watch his girlfriend, who was slumped against a wall nearby, and urged me not to let her fall asleep, because shed been mixing hard liquor and painkillers. 

For about half an hour, I kept her awake with chit-chat and the occasional warning of Hey, your eyes are rolling into your head. You might want to watch that.

As I was getting her some ice from an irritated hot dog vendor who only agreed when I told him why she needed it, J.R. returned with a thoroughly hammered BBW. A roommate, he explained, before disappearing again to look for the other. She sat down next to his girl, and they took turns failing to talk to each other. She asked me to pull a trash can out of its metal holder so she could throw up in it, several times. Tell me Im a horrible fucking person and you hate me she slurred, in between the promises never to drink again you always hear from someone who'll break them within the week.

About 10 minutes later, he came back a final time with an equally chubby, milquetoasty guy - although not her boyfriend, he made clear - who sat down next to the drunk girl and held her hair as she retched. He was cold sober, with sad eyes. Obviously the nice guy - the one who always gets stuck being "the responsible one." She passed out in her arms, and he stroked her hair.

None of them had a car, but they needed to get home, and although at least coherent, I was in no shape to do it. So I trusted him with my keys, and we piled everyone into my old Civic. He drove me five minutes down the road to the middle of the city's poorest neighborhood, parking in front of an ancient, dingy walk-up.

We helped the two girls up the stairs, and they led me into their home, a violently depressing room with peeling paint, a carpet so stained no one could identify its original color, a tiny closet, and a sheetless queen-size mattress, which all four of them shared. That's all.

The two girls passed out on it. JR stared off, and the chubby guy laid over the BBW and caressed her in a way that made his feelings plain.

Nature called, so the chubby guy walked me down to a dry-rotting, closet-sized bathroom shared by everyone on that floor, with one abjectly funky toilet, a rusted sink, and no soap.

We were alone, and I was drunk enough to be less tactful than I usually am, so before going in, I asked him if he liked her. He admitted it, then avoided eye contact with me for the rest of my stay.

About five minutes later I took J.R. aside and asked him how much he was paying for the place, and why he chose to stay there. $500. More than my own rent for a clean room in a decent house.

He told me they couldnt move, because he desperately needed a stable address while he looked for a job that would pay for something better. He'd had two children by his girlfriend, and Social Services had taken them. The reason he gave me was that the government found their living space unsuitable for raising kids.

Now, in hindsight, I realized that in light of their mom being passed out on vodka and pills on the mattress several feet away, that may not have been the only reason, but I didn't realize that at the time: All I could think at the moment was that I understood why people who sell drugs, join gangs, and rot in jail for decades say they didn't have much to lose. 

I'd worked in that neighborhood before, back when my mom and I were delivering produce out of her car - the family business. Overheard a shooting, which I thought was firecrackers until the flashing lights pulled up two doors down from where we were selling tomatoes... Brought groceries to people who were so ill, physically or mentally, that they could barely function and shut themselves into squalid project apartments... Seen children eat dropped food off the sidewalk... 

But I'd never really seen people live like that. I still can't imagine what it must be like, to be honest.

I hadn't planned on going back to that club, but I very well might, just to see them again. 

I'll consider telling the BBW about how her roommate secretly feels, but she probably knows. It might be best to leave well enough alone.


----------



## Heyyou

That Guy You Met Once said:


> Yesterday was my 21st birthday. I went to a local goth club to celebrate.
> 
> However, I didn't have enough to affect my memory, so I've been thinking about last night a lot.
> 
> Staggering outside after five drinks, I ran into a guy I knew only as J.R. Slightly notable because he was one of the five or six black people Id ever seen at a goth club, and because he owned the same hat as me, but besides that, just another face in the crowd.
> 
> He took me aside and told me he needed to run in and get his two roommates so they could get home, because they'd had enough for one night. But before he went in, he urged me to watch his girlfriend, who was slumped against a wall nearby, and urged me not to let her fall asleep, because shed been mixing hard liquor and painkillers.
> 
> For about half an hour, I kept her awake with chit-chat and the occasional warning of Hey, your eyes are rolling into your head. You might want to watch that.
> 
> As I was getting her some ice from an irritated hot dog vendor who only agreed when I told him why she needed it, J.R. returned with a thoroughly hammered BBW. A roommate, he explained, before disappearing again to look for the other. She sat down next to his girl, and they took turns failing to talk to each other. She asked me to pull a trash can out of its metal holder so she could throw up in it, several times. Tell me Im a horrible fucking person and you hate me she slurred, in between the promises never to drink again you always hear from someone who'll break them within the week.
> 
> About 10 minutes later, he came back a final time with an equally chubby, milquetoasty guy - although not her boyfriend, he made clear - who sat down next to the drunk girl and held her hair as she retched. He was cold sober, with sad eyes. Obviously the nice guy - the one who always gets stuck being "the responsible one." She passed out in her arms, and he stroked her hair.
> 
> None of them had a car, but they needed to get home, and although at least coherent, I was in no shape to do it. So I trusted him with my keys, and we piled everyone into my old Civic. He drove me five minutes down the road to the middle of the city's poorest neighborhood, parking in front of an ancient, dingy walk-up.
> 
> We helped the two girls up the stairs, and they led me into their home, a violently depressing room with peeling paint, a carpet so stained no one could identify its original color, a tiny closet, and a sheetless queen-size mattress, which all four of them shared. That's all.
> 
> The two girls passed out on it. JR stared off, and the chubby guy laid over the BBW and caressed her in a way that made his feelings plain.
> 
> Nature called, so the chubby guy walked me down to a dry-rotting, closet-sized bathroom shared by everyone on that floor, with one abjectly funky toilet, a rusted sink, and no soap.
> 
> We were alone, and I was drunk enough to be less tactful than I usually am, so before going in, I asked him if he liked her. He admitted it, then avoided eye contact with me for the rest of my stay.
> 
> About five minutes later I took J.R. aside and asked him how much he was paying for the place, and why he chose to stay there. $500. More than my own rent for a clean room in a decent house.
> 
> He told me they couldnt move, because he desperately needed a stable address while he looked for a job that would pay for something better. He'd had two children by his girlfriend, and Social Services had taken them. The reason he gave me was that the government found their living space unsuitable for raising kids.
> 
> Now, in hindsight, I realized that in light of their mom being passed out on vodka and pills on the mattress several feet away, that may not have been the only reason, but I didn't realize that at the time: All I could think at the moment was that I understood why people who sell drugs, join gangs, and rot in jail for decades say they didn't have much to lose.
> 
> I'd worked in that neighborhood before, back when my mom and I were delivering produce out of her car - the family business. Overheard a shooting, which I thought was firecrackers until the flashing lights pulled up two doors down from where we were selling tomatoes... Brought groceries to people who were so ill, physically or mentally, that they could barely function and shut themselves into squalid project apartments... Seen children eat dropped food off the sidewalk...
> 
> But I'd never really seen people live like that. I still can't imagine what it must be like, to be honest.
> 
> I hadn't planned on going back to that club, but I very well might, just to see them again.
> 
> I'll consider telling the BBW about how her roommate secretly feels, but she probably knows. It might be best to leave well enough alone.



Ill pray for you, man. I was 21 once. Ive been in your shoes!

Wells Fargo is harassing my mom again. She doesnt understand that she can get them to stop CALLING if i apply my knowledge o credit to her situation. At issue are payments on her 2003 GMC Envoy XL. Here we are in Florida with it. 

Dont lie, you like it. And its in like-new condition and it has low miles. Im impressed! 4.2L I6. Thats a fav engine of mine. 






So, im sad that she willfully pays the stupid creditors and all they do is harass her in the process. SHE WONT LET ME TELL HER HOW SHE CAN WRITE CERTIFIED MAIL AND GET IT TO STOP AND LOWER HER PAYMENTS!! She pays and things things over the phone are binding.

Oh, Mom, i love you a lot. I hope they get off your back, though I think you are going about it the wrong way. Thanks. - Your son.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

My RL friend of 2 years sent me this message in response to my question "What's wrong?" ; 

_"I'm just soo down now idk how to get back up. I just wanna sit in my freezing house n cry n sleep. Doc says if I don't have surgry, I'm done in 1 year. Cancers spreading n I can't afford the surgry. I got 12 days to get my stuff outta the house n have nowhere to put it...idk I'm very close to committing myself..feel like I'm losing my mind" _

I don't even know what to think, I'm just sobbing. I guess she has cervical cancer that's starting to spread toward her kidneys and if she doesn't have this hysterectomy she's done for. She wants to throw in the towel, I told her I refuse to let her, it's not happening. I refuse to let this happen to someone I love, fucking refuse.


----------



## spacce

Your Plump Princess said:


> My RL friend of 2 years sent me this message in response to my question "What's wrong?" ;
> 
> _"I'm just soo down now idk how to get back up. I just wanna sit in my freezing house n cry n sleep. Doc says if I don't have surgry, I'm done in 1 year. Cancers spreading n I can't afford the surgry. I got 12 days to get my stuff outta the house n have nowhere to put it...idk I'm very close to committing myself..feel like I'm losing my mind" _
> 
> I don't even know what to think, I'm just sobbing. I guess she has cervical cancer that's starting to spread toward her kidneys and if she doesn't have this hysterectomy she's done for. She wants to throw in the towel, I told her I refuse to let her, it's not happening. I refuse to let this happen to someone I love, fucking refuse.


yeah things like that make me really pissed off about the american health care system...


----------



## TwilightStarr

I don't know what it is about this time of year but once again it hit me today how sad I am that I don't have someone in my life and I am still single.


----------



## Twilley

being separated from all of my friends. I hate unplanned moves v.v


----------



## Your Plump Princess

TwilightStarr said:


> I don't know what it is about this time of year but once again it hit me today how sad I am that I don't have someone in my life and I am still single.


This! 

I call it "Early Onset Holiday Blues"


----------



## danielson123

Sooo the girls that my friend and I have been 'talking to' won a VIP party at a club/bar for tonight and asked us to go (we're the only guys they asked so far, only other people are one of the girls' sisters) aaaannnnd I can't go because I'm only fucking 20 years old. :really sad: My friend is still going, and leaving me hanging. So now I have nothing to do tonight and my friend is spending tonight with some awesome girls. All I can say is he better do what he said he would and try to keep my name floating around and try to set something up for us all to do this weekend.

I feel very left out.


----------



## Linda

danielson123 said:


> Sooo the girls that my friend and I have been 'talking to' won a VIP party at a club/bar for tonight and asked us to go (we're the only guys they asked so far, only other people are one of the girls' sisters) aaaannnnd I can't go because I'm only fucking 20 years old. :really sad: My friend is still going, and leaving me hanging. So now I have nothing to do tonight and my friend is spending tonight with some awesome girls. All I can say is he better do what he said he would and try to keep my name floating around and try to set something up for us all to do this weekend.
> 
> I feel very left out.






Aww that kind of sucks. I'm sorry. Go find something else fun to do for tonight. Don't sit at home and dwell on this.


----------



## TwilightStarr

Your Plump Princess said:


> This!
> 
> I call it "Early Onset Holiday Blues"



Well at least now I have something to call it!


----------



## Mathias

TwilightStarr said:


> I don't know what it is about this time of year but once again it hit me today how sad I am that I don't have someone in my life and I am still single.



Me too. :really sad:


----------



## rellis10

I didnt get the job I interviewed for and my cake is going depressingly badly. Oh the pitfalls of baking :doh:


----------



## Deven

Back story:

I've been friends with "A" since we were 11 years old. He was my best friend's boyfriend, but he and I clicked better... and the next year, he was outed as gay. "M," his ex-girlfriend, told me I had to pick: him or her. I begged her not to make me choose, as she wouldn't like my choice. She continued, and I picked him. I never regretted it, not for a moment. Everyone was against us, the school thought he was a bad influence (he came from a bad home, had a bad habit of shoplifting, mostly food because his mom would leave for weeks at a time, leaving nothing but whatever was in the cockroach infested trailer.) He pretty much lived with my mother and I full time until High School, when we were separated (his mom sent him to a school for the mentally ill, so she could collect SSI from him being, in his own words, "her sick little pillbag." I moved from place to place for years.) My stepdad would hide letters from him, he wrote me over 100 letters, and gave up when he got a return to sender.

Fast forward a few years, and we manage to reconnect our senior year of high school. He dropped out, I was graduated, and it was like nothing happened at all. I even called him one day, and asked what he was doing May 18th. His reply? "Going to your prom." That's what I had called to ask him. 

A year later, he moved in with my mom and I again, because his mom wanted him to continue being her income, using him to get SSI. He started working, fell in love, and everything was great. 

Until I moved away, way after he moved out of the apartment we all shared. We talked occasionally, and the gaps between conversations got wider... and wider... and wider... I haven't heard a word from him since my birthday, which was 7 months ago. I sent him a few facebook messages, because his statuses were distressed, depressed, asking what was wrong. No response, but he has time to respond to everyone else. So, I sent him this message today:

*I don't know when we drifted so far apart you can't even answer a text/message from me. I see your posts and I get concerned. This isn't meant to be dramatic. I'm just not fully sure I want 7 months of silence anymore, one call a year, maybe. Mom asks about you, and with how sick she still is (and believe me, she still is) I don't like telling her I don't know. I know you're busy, and trust me, I am too. I just scheduled 7 classes for next semester. I have classes every day but Sunday. I know we aren't the bright eyed kids we used to be, but I hoped our friendship was forever.

If you don't want to be my friend, don't. If you do, try to at least treat me as such.*

I've decided if I don't get a reply in a reasonable amount of time, it's best if I move on. I've loved him like a brother since we were kids, over 10 years. This hurts so much, but maybe it's for the best.


----------



## CleverBomb

Linda said:


> Aww that kind of sucks. I'm sorry. Go find something else fun to do for tonight. Don't sit at home and dwell on this.


She's right

-Rusty


----------



## moore2me

DevenDoom said:


> Back story:
> 
> I've been friends with "A" since we were 11 years old. He was my best friend's boyfriend, but he and I clicked better... and the next year, he was outed as gay. "M," his ex-girlfriend, told me I had to pick: him or her. I begged her not to make me choose, as she wouldn't like my choice. She continued, and I picked him. I never regretted it, not for a moment. Everyone was against us, the school thought he was a bad influence (he came from a bad home, had a bad habit of shoplifting, mostly food because his mom would leave for weeks at a time, leaving nothing but whatever was in the cockroach infested trailer.) He pretty much lived with my mother and I full time until High School, when we were separated (his mom sent him to a school for the mentally ill, so she could collect SSI from him being, in his own words, "her sick little pillbag." I moved from place to place for years.) My stepdad would hide letters from him, he wrote me over 100 letters, and gave up when he got a return to sender.
> 
> Fast forward a few years, and we manage to reconnect our senior year of high school. He dropped out, I was graduated, and it was like nothing happened at all. I even called him one day, and asked what he was doing May 18th. His reply? "Going to your prom." That's what I had called to ask him.
> 
> A year later, he moved in with my mom and I again, because his mom wanted him to continue being her income, using him to get SSI. He started working, fell in love, and everything was great.
> 
> Until I moved away, way after he moved out of the apartment we all shared. We talked occasionally, and the gaps between conversations got wider... and wider... and wider... I haven't heard a word from him since my birthday, which was 7 months ago. I sent him a few facebook messages, because his statuses were distressed, depressed, asking what was wrong. No response, but he has time to respond to everyone else. So, I sent him this message today:
> 
> *I don't know when we drifted so far apart you can't even answer a text/message from me. I see your posts and I get concerned. This isn't meant to be dramatic. I'm just not fully sure I want 7 months of silence anymore, one call a year, maybe. Mom asks about you, and with how sick she still is (and believe me, she still is) I don't like telling her I don't know. I know you're busy, and trust me, I am too. I just scheduled 7 classes for next semester. I have classes every day but Sunday. I know we aren't the bright eyed kids we used to be, but I hoped our friendship was forever.
> 
> If you don't want to be my friend, don't. If you do, try to at least treat me as such.*
> 
> I've decided if I don't get a reply in a reasonable amount of time, it's best if I move on. I've loved him like a brother since we were kids, over 10 years. This hurts so much, but maybe it's for the best.



Devin,

It sounds like you are really attached to this guy, emotionally and thru growing up together. However, you have described a horrific life for a child, pre-teen, and young man. This kind of upbringing must have damaged his life in ways you don't even know. He likely has major emotional problems and other bad issues (courtesy of his mom) that you can only guess at.

*My point is - do not get any closer to this guy. Leave him alone. He has done you a great favor by leaving you alone. You cannot rescue him.* He will likely drag you down and make it impossible to have a normal adulthood and a normal family (children, career, home, etc.). This kind of man and his awful load of psycological and physical damage will not be able to be a normal loving husband or a normal loving father or grandfather. No way. 

*I know this sounds cruel, but he is like a crippled, sick puppy. He needs help, lots of it. But not your help*. Let the pros help him. You need to concentrate on a heavy college schedule and your upcoming adult life - believe me, he will just take your kindness, concerns, and gifts and destroy them. I have been there and done that. It will break you heart, spirit, and it may kill your future dreams.

His mom is a witch.  She is not alone, there are actually others in our state that have their kids declared as disabled so the parents can get "crazy checks" from the government. Some of these kids grow up with the main goal in life to get a 100% disability - the cycle just keeps repeating. It has got to be difficult for a child raised like that to grow up to be normal and DO NOT HITCH YOUR WAGON TO HIM!


P.S. Don't forget that the average study time for an hour of college classtime is three hours. You will need to be studying a whole lot more than just Sunday with such a Spartan schedule. If you want to succeed in your school goals, you will only have a itsy-bit of time left for boys.


----------



## Deven

moore2me said:


> Devin,
> 
> It sounds like you are really attached to this guy, emotionally and thru growing up together. However, you have described a horrific life for a child, pre-teen, and young man. This kind of upbringing must have damaged his life in ways you don't even know. He likely has major emotional problems and other bad issues (courtesy of his mom) that you can only guess at.
> 
> *My point is - do not get any closer to this guy. Leave him alone. He has done you a great favor by leaving you alone. You cannot rescue him.* He will likely drag you down and make it impossible to have a normal adulthood and a normal family (children, career, home, etc.). This kind of man and his awful load of psycological and physical damage will not be able to be a normal loving husband or a normal loving father or grandfather. No way.
> 
> *I know this sounds cruel, but he is like a crippled, sick puppy. He needs help, lots of it. But not your help*. Let the pros help him. You need to concentrate on a heavy college schedule and your upcoming adult life - believe me, he will just take your kindness, concerns, and gifts and destroy them. I have been there and done that. It will break you heart, spirit, and it may kill your future dreams.
> 
> His mom is a witch.  She is not alone, there are actually others in our state that have their kids declared as disabled so the parents can get "crazy checks" from the government. Some of these kids grow up with the main goal in life to get a 100% disability - the cycle just keeps repeating. It has got to be difficult for a child raised like that to grow up to be normal and DO NOT HITCH YOUR WAGON TO HIM!
> 
> 
> P.S. Don't forget that the average study time for an hour of college classtime is three hours. You will need to be studying a whole lot more than just Sunday with such a Spartan schedule. If you want to succeed in your school goals, you will only have a itsy-bit of time left for boys.



1.) He's the night manager of a WaWa and we lived together as roommates for 2 years. He's 25 now, and I'm 24. I'm a 24 year old freshman. He's been free of his mom's influence for several years. He's not trying to live off of welfare. I pointed out in my post that he started working and fell in love.

2.) He's gay and married. I said he was outed when we were 11. I'm not interested in him like that... I never was.

3.) I'm married, so there's going to have to be time for my husband... who stands behind me in attending college. He understands that my school work comes first.

4.) We've been friends for 13 years, and he hasn't dragged me down yet. In fact, he's done just the opposite, and he's saved my life. I've just felt ignored recently, and he called me about an hour ago and we sorted things out. He was scared to call because of my class schedule (while telling me he is so happy that I finally went to college, because he didn't want to be a guinea pig for cosmetology school again,) and he's going to come up to see me with his husband as soon as they have time (they both work full time, own a house, one's an EMT that has a pretty unpredictable schedule, and A works overnights at the WaWa, and since he's a manager, he has to fill in, work all sorts of hours.

Maybe my initial post was misleading and made it seem like a shorter span of friendship time that it has been. I also wanted to point out how much bad our friendship has gone through. He's enriched my life in so many ways, taught me to be myself, and to ignore what others thought. Moving 2 and a half hours away from home made me feel so isolated, so... alone. I just miss him greatly.

PS: His mom IS a witch. A smelly one at that. She had a degree to be a librarian and lived off welfare instead... and never even made an attempt to get a job. 

Edit: His depressing facebook statuses were because he suspected his husband was cheating. He wasn't, just planning a surprise.


----------



## one2one

Everyone has a right to have a voice, especially on a forum. On ones dedicated to size acceptance, it's especially important to remember that sometimes people come here because they're bullied, discounted, ignored and silenced in so many ways IRL. We collectively create everything that happens here. I believe we can also create an environment where we don't perpetuate the same conditions we've all experience too many times already. http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/532829/online_forum_etiquette_how_to_deal.html?cat=15


----------



## 1love_emily

I haven't heard from Derek since Friday night. It's now Monday night. 

I think either 
A) He's dead
B) His phone is broken
C) He's pissed at me
D) He lost his phone.

I really hope it's B or D


----------



## CastingPearls

1love_emily said:


> I haven't heard from Derek since Friday night. It's now Monday night.
> 
> I think either
> A) He's dead
> B) His phone is broken
> C) He's pissed at me
> D) He lost his phone.
> 
> I really hope it's B or D


You're not giving him a chance to miss you, Em. He will contact you when he's ready. Big big hugs.


----------



## 1love_emily

CastingPearls said:


> You're not giving him a chance to miss you, Em. He will contact you when he's ready. Big big hugs.



Thanks. I don't like this though. I don't like having to miss him.. or him taking this long to miss me. It makes me all anxious thinking about what I might have done wrong... 

And it makes me scared, because I am honestly terrified that he is dead.


----------



## CastingPearls

1love_emily said:


> Thanks. I don't like this though. I don't like having to miss him.. or him taking this long to miss me. It makes me all anxious thinking about what I might have done wrong...
> 
> And it makes me scared, because I am honestly terrified that he is dead.


Okay, take deep breaths. Why are you thinking the absolute worst and not hoping for the best?

And three days is not that long, seriously. Three weeks--yeah, but three days can mean he's busy. He could still be thinking of you but busy......, right?


----------



## AuntHen

CastingPearls said:


> Okay, take deep breaths. Why are you thinking the absolute worst and not hoping for the best?
> 
> And three days is not that long, seriously. Three weeks--yeah, but three days can mean he's busy. He could still be thinking of you but busy......, right?




agreed. get really busy and you will not be thinking of missing him and he will probably wonder what you are up to.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Seems to me that emily freaking out after 3 days is probably an indication that they were previously in contact every day and that contact suddenly stopped. I can understand being worried in that situation. Try to stay calm, honey - it's probably just a phone problem.


----------



## 1love_emily

CastingPearls said:


> Okay, take deep breaths. Why are you thinking the absolute worst and not hoping for the best?
> 
> And three days is not that long, seriously. Three weeks--yeah, but three days can mean he's busy. He could still be thinking of you but busy......, right?





fat9276 said:


> agreed. get really busy and you will not be thinking of missing him and he will probably wonder what you are up to.





BigBeautifulMe said:


> Seems to me that emily freaking out after 3 days is probably an indication that they were previously in contact every day and that contact suddenly stopped. I can understand being worried in that situation. Try to stay calm, honey - it's probably just a phone problem.



Yeah, Derek and I usually talk every day, all day. You know, just texting throughout the day. But I still haven't heard from him. I really hope it's just his phone. Thank you so much for caring, guys. It's been so hard and confusing.


----------



## rellis10

1love_emily said:


> Yeah, Derek and I usually talk every day, all day. You know, just texting throughout the day. But I still haven't heard from him. I really hope it's just his phone. Thank you so much for caring, guys. It's been so hard and confusing.



I've been in this kind of situation before, unable to contact a loved one and feeling so frustrated and lost because of it. It's easy for technology to break and cause those fine lines of contact to be broken too. Try not to worry, I know it's not easy but know the relief and joy you'll experience when you talk again will be great


----------



## 1love_emily

Thank you all for the help! Derek called! Of course, I was the one who over reacted. He wasn't dead. He just lost his phone :doh: 

Major criss averted. Thanks dimmers for all the loving advice!


----------



## CastingPearls

1love_emily said:


> Thank you all for the help! Derek called! Of course, I was the one who over reacted. He wasn't dead. He just lost his phone :doh:
> 
> Major criss averted. Thanks dimmers for all the loving advice!


I am SO happy and relieved for you. Yay!


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

1love_emily said:


> Thank you all for the help! Derek called! Of course, I was the one who over reacted. He wasn't dead. He just lost his phone :doh:
> 
> Major criss averted. Thanks dimmers for all the loving advice!


Yay!  Now you guys might want to consider exchanging, oh, I dunno, e-mail addresses or landlines or smoke signal directions. LOL  I'm kidding.


----------



## Mathias

I've been feeling rather lonesome today.


----------



## moore2me

Mathias said:


> I've been feeling rather lonesome today.
> 
> What for you bury me in the cold cold ground?



Maybe this will make you feel better.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cUDmIprb8PM&feature=player_embedded#!


----------



## moore2me

DevenDoom said:


> 1.) He's the night manager of a WaWa and we lived together as roommates for 2 years. He's 25 now, and I'm 24. I'm a 24 year old freshman. He's been free of his mom's influence for several years. He's not trying to live off of welfare. I pointed out in my post that he started working and fell in love.
> 
> 2.) He's gay and married. I said he was outed when we were 11. I'm not interested in him like that... I never was.
> 
> 3.) I'm married, so there's going to have to be time for my husband... who stands behind me in attending college. He understands that my school work comes first.
> 
> 4.) We've been friends for 13 years, and he hasn't dragged me down yet. In fact, he's done just the opposite, and he's saved my life. I've just felt ignored recently, and he called me about an hour ago and we sorted things out. He was scared to call because of my class schedule (while telling me he is so happy that I finally went to college, because he didn't want to be a guinea pig for cosmetology school again,) and he's going to come up to see me with his husband as soon as they have time (they both work full time, own a house, one's an EMT that has a pretty unpredictable schedule, and A works overnights at the WaWa, and since he's a manager, he has to fill in, work all sorts of hours.
> 
> Maybe my initial post was misleading and made it seem like a shorter span of friendship time that it has been. I also wanted to point out how much bad our friendship has gone through. He's enriched my life in so many ways, taught me to be myself, and to ignore what others thought. Moving 2 and a half hours away from home made me feel so isolated, so... alone. I just miss him greatly.
> 
> PS: His mom IS a witch. A smelly one at that. She had a degree to be a librarian and lived off welfare instead... and never even made an attempt to get a job.
> 
> Edit: His depressing facebook statuses were because he suspected his husband was cheating. He wasn't, just planning a surprise.



I apologize for over reacting. I did not understand that your relationship was platonic. Having one good friend as you describe him during a lifetime is lucky. I also wish you good luck in school. However, it sounds like you are a woman who makes her own luck and this is the best way to handle life. Again, excuse me for giving out un-asked for advice - it's the old schoolmarm in me and I should keep my big yap shut more often. (This sounds like a good New Year's resolution for self.) :doh:


----------



## Mathias

moore2me said:


> Maybe this will make you feel better.
> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cUDmIprb8PM&feature=player_embedded#!



I freaking love that cartoon. :happy:


----------



## CAMellie

I am very saddened at the fact that I have to ask for my father-in-law's help to get Adrian's mother and brother to set aside their animosity towards me in order for them to attend Adrian's birthday party. Having so much dislike for someone that they barely know and who makes Adrian so happy is very confusing for me...and painful for my husband.


----------



## AuntHen

1love_emily said:


> Thank you all for the help! Derek called! Of course, I was the one who over reacted. He wasn't dead. He just lost his phone :doh:
> 
> Major criss averted. Thanks dimmers for all the loving advice!




I am very glad to hear that he is well Emily!


----------



## Zandoz

I hate having to be "dependent on the kindness of strangers".


----------



## mimosa

Today, I realized that I have to move on with my life. I can not be where I am not wanted. I just not sure how. Especially because I am suffering from agoraphobia. Sometimes I wish I could go somewhere far away and start my life again.


----------



## CastingPearls

My ex is letting our house go into foreclosure just to be vindictive.


----------



## Surlysomething

CastingPearls said:


> My ex is letting our house go into foreclosure just to be vindictive.


 
What a waste.

Life is way too short for that kind of shit.


----------



## LifeTraveller

There's something about this time of year that does drag me down a bit. . Although I've been blessed, and continue to be so. . I have a warm place to live, I do have food to eat, and have so much to be thankful for.. 

However, I must confess having lost my only brother, Mother and beloved wife all during the "holiday season" and all within a couple of years.. It's difficult to find reasons to celebrate. . yet celebrate I do, perhaps in a more reserved fashion. 

I have children that live nearly across the continent, but there are telephones and web cams these days. . Sadly, it's not the same. . I probably could go and visit, but I'm saving that for Christmas. . weather permitting. . So much water has traversed the bridge, a great deal of it bad, yet still I have hope. .


----------



## Diana_Prince245

CastingPearls said:


> My ex is letting our house go into foreclosure just to be vindictive.



Big jerkhead


----------



## seavixen

So many things are up in the air right now. It's exhausting.


----------



## littlefairywren

CastingPearls said:


> My ex is letting our house go into foreclosure just to be vindictive.



Big bastard arse!


----------



## Gingembre

So...Dims is telling me I haven't posted in a few weeks. Well, I've had a brief lurk now & again but I haven't been very communicative with anyone recently. I'm in a major funk...I'm feeling more down than I have for ages, maybe even ever. 

Basically my dad tried to kill himself a few weeks ago, in a drunken row with my mum. I was out at the time, and housesitting, but my mum finally got hold of me and I had to drive to the hospital to pick him up at 1am, after he had 10 stitches in his arm, then help clean up the blood that was splattered all over the kitchen. He's been depressed and getting more argumentative/threatening (towards himself) for years but refuses to admit that he needs help. I was surprised the hospital let him go that night, I don't know what he told them, but he took the stitches out himself with the kitchen scissors last week so he didnt have to go to the doctors. I'm not close to my dad particularly and now I make small talk with him but he knows I have nothing to say to him until he seeks the help he obviously needs. Yesterday I couldnt get hold of him for 3 hours and I was terrified I was going to get home and find him hanging in the garage or something....I was almost on the internet looking up traffic reports when he called back, but if i mention anything like that he tells me not to be stupid and stops talking to me for days. He never said thanks for me picking him up and he's never said sorry to me (although he has to my sister, who doesnt live at home) and I accept that he never will.

I also think my LD relationship is coming to an end. I miss him so much, but the whole thing is so one sided. I'm doing sh*t jobs to earn whatever money so i can go and visit him, yet he thinks jobs like that are beneath him and would rather complain about having no money and wait for a golden opportunity. Money shouldnt matter, but when you live a £500 flight apart, it does. He's not in a hurry to come and visit me here, or think about the future, so I'm not sure it's worth the investment going there again. He doesn't want me to visit for only a couple of weeks coz it'll make him miss me more (?) and he's ok for waiting for me for years (to move there, i think) because "knowing he's in my heart is all that matters"...well, it's not all that matters to me, and the fact he can't be here to support me when i need him is feeding my unhappiness. I'm not sure i can take it anymore.

Another of my friends just got engaged and bought a house and, while i'm happy for her (no, i am), it's not helping. I'm the only one of my friends whose still living at home, without a car, a job they like/career or, potentially, a boyfriend. I feel like i'm failing at life and I don't know how I got so far behind. I've got 2 interviews (so far) to study midwifery (small yay!) but all i can think about is a)what if i don't get a place or b)what if i get a place and can't do it. I'm just really struggling to see the positive in anything at the moment. I'm hoping it's mostly hormonal and will wash over.

Ok, so, that's the longest post ever, but I wanted to get uptodate and start posting again, because even in just a few weeks, i have missed this community. Thought this was as good a place to start as any.

Hope y'all alright.


----------



## Diana_Prince245

Hugs. That's a lot of stuff for one person to have to deal with at one time.


----------



## bigmac

CastingPearls said:


> My ex is letting our house go into foreclosure just to be vindictive.



Sorry to hear that -- my ex sold one of our houses in 2005 without my consent -- couldn't do anything about it (i.e. couldn't accuse the mother of my two oldest kids with fraud without serious family repercussions).


----------



## bigmac

I'm really tired of driving 800km to see my wife and family every weekend. I need to live in a smaller state.


----------



## PunkyGurly74

I am missing my parents...damn holidays - boo and hiss. Boo and hiss.


----------



## CastingPearls

Everything is a struggle. I need a break. I need some luck. I need some mercy. I'm strong but I'm not made of iron.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

CAMellie said:


> I am very saddened at the fact that I have to ask for my father-in-law's help to get Adrian's mother and brother to set aside their animosity towards me in order for them to attend Adrian's birthday party. Having so much dislike for someone that they barely know and who makes Adrian so happy is very confusing for me...and painful for my husband.



You all looked so happy in the pics! I thought you were getting along with them. I'm so sorry.  



CastingPearls said:


> My ex is letting our house go into foreclosure just to be vindictive.



What a dick. I'm assuming you've already talked to your lawyer about it, yes? Without knowing your situation, I'd be worried about what it's going to do to your credit and/or if you'll be held responsible for the debt at all.



Gingembre said:


> So...Dims is telling me I haven't posted in a few weeks. Well, I've had a brief lurk now & again but I haven't been very communicative with anyone recently. I'm in a major funk...I'm feeling more down than I have for ages, maybe even ever.
> 
> Basically my dad tried to kill himself a few weeks ago, in a drunken row with my mum. I was out at the time, and housesitting, but my mum finally got hold of me and I had to drive to the hospital to pick him up at 1am, after he had 10 stitches in his arm, then help clean up the blood that was splattered all over the kitchen. He's been depressed and getting more argumentative/threatening (towards himself) for years but refuses to admit that he needs help. I was surprised the hospital let him go that night, I don't know what he told them, but he took the stitches out himself with the kitchen scissors last week so he didnt have to go to the doctors. I'm not close to my dad particularly and now I make small talk with him but he knows I have nothing to say to him until he seeks the help he obviously needs. Yesterday I couldnt get hold of him for 3 hours and I was terrified I was going to get home and find him hanging in the garage or something....I was almost on the internet looking up traffic reports when he called back, but if i mention anything like that he tells me not to be stupid and stops talking to me for days. He never said thanks for me picking him up and he's never said sorry to me (although he has to my sister, who doesnt live at home) and I accept that he never will.
> 
> I also think my LD relationship is coming to an end. I miss him so much, but the whole thing is so one sided. I'm doing sh*t jobs to earn whatever money so i can go and visit him, yet he thinks jobs like that are beneath him and would rather complain about having no money and wait for a golden opportunity. Money shouldnt matter, but when you live a £500 flight apart, it does. He's not in a hurry to come and visit me here, or think about the future, so I'm not sure it's worth the investment going there again. He doesn't want me to visit for only a couple of weeks coz it'll make him miss me more (?) and he's ok for waiting for me for years (to move there, i think) because "knowing he's in my heart is all that matters"...well, it's not all that matters to me, and the fact he can't be here to support me when i need him is feeding my unhappiness. I'm not sure i can take it anymore.
> 
> Another of my friends just got engaged and bought a house and, while i'm happy for her (no, i am), it's not helping. I'm the only one of my friends whose still living at home, without a car, a job they like/career or, potentially, a boyfriend. I feel like i'm failing at life and I don't know how I got so far behind. I've got 2 interviews (so far) to study midwifery (small yay!) but all i can think about is a)what if i don't get a place or b)what if i get a place and can't do it. I'm just really struggling to see the positive in anything at the moment. I'm hoping it's mostly hormonal and will wash over.
> 
> Ok, so, that's the longest post ever, but I wanted to get uptodate and start posting again, because even in just a few weeks, i have missed this community. Thought this was as good a place to start as any.
> 
> Hope y'all alright.



Ginge, that is SO much you're having to deal with right now.  I am so sorry.  To have someone you love try to end things must be so horrific. I can't even imagine. I know you know this, but what he's doing is a reflection of his mental illness, and not of how he really feels about you. That doesn't make it any easier on you, though.  Also, I could have written that paragraph re: friends and failing at life myself. I SO empathize. I really, really hope things start looking up for you soon. You're a kind person, and you deserve much better.



CastingPearls said:


> Everything is a struggle. I need a break. I need some luck. I need some mercy. I'm strong but I'm not made of iron.



Even the strongest among us needs time to be weak. If you need an ear, you know where I am. Be gentle with yourself. <3


----------



## PunkyGurly74

CastingPearls said:


> Everything is a struggle. I need a break. I need some luck. I need some mercy. I'm strong but I'm not made of iron.



Here's to hoping you find some calm, if only for a short period of time where you can breathe....


----------



## CAMellie

BigBeautifulMe said:


> You all looked so happy in the pics! I thought you were getting along with them. I'm so sorry.



That's his father's family in those pics. I get along with them just fine. I also get along fine with 2 of his brothers and his baby sister. His mother and one of his brothers don't "approve" of me or the marriage and haven't even bothered contacting Adrian since the wedding. I'm just hoping that my father-in-law can get them to stop being asses and just be there for Adrian on his birthday. They don't have to like me (I really couldn't care less about that)...but I don't think it's fair to "punish" Adrian.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

CAMellie said:


> That's his father's family in those pics. I get along with them just fine. I also get along fine with 2 of his brothers and his baby sister. His mother and one of his brothers don't "approve" of me or the marriage and haven't even bothered contacting Adrian since the wedding. I'm just hoping that my father-in-law can get them to stop being asses and just be there for Adrian on his birthday. They don't have to like me (I really couldn't care less about that)...but I don't think it's fair to "punish" Adrian.


Ah, wow. Yes, that's horrendous. I hope your father-in-law can help.


----------



## AuntHen

Gingembre said:


> So...Dims is telling me I haven't posted in a few weeks. Well, I've had a brief lurk now & again but I haven't been very communicative with anyone recently. I'm in a major funk...I'm feeling more down than I have for ages, maybe even ever.
> 
> Basically my dad tried to kill himself a few weeks ago, in a drunken row with my mum. I was out at the time, and housesitting, but my mum finally got hold of me and I had to drive to the hospital to pick him up at 1am, after he had 10 stitches in his arm, then help clean up the blood that was splattered all over the kitchen. He's been depressed and getting more argumentative/threatening (towards himself) for years but refuses to admit that he needs help. I was surprised the hospital let him go that night, I don't know what he told them, but he took the stitches out himself with the kitchen scissors last week so he didnt have to go to the doctors. I'm not close to my dad particularly and now I make small talk with him but he knows I have nothing to say to him until he seeks the help he obviously needs. Yesterday I couldnt get hold of him for 3 hours and I was terrified I was going to get home and find him hanging in the garage or something....I was almost on the internet looking up traffic reports when he called back, but if i mention anything like that he tells me not to be stupid and stops talking to me for days. He never said thanks for me picking him up and he's never said sorry to me (although he has to my sister, who doesnt live at home) and I accept that he never will.
> 
> I also think my LD relationship is coming to an end. I miss him so much, but the whole thing is so one sided. I'm doing sh*t jobs to earn whatever money so i can go and visit him, yet he thinks jobs like that are beneath him and would rather complain about having no money and wait for a golden opportunity. Money shouldnt matter, but when you live a £500 flight apart, it does. He's not in a hurry to come and visit me here, or think about the future, so I'm not sure it's worth the investment going there again. He doesn't want me to visit for only a couple of weeks coz it'll make him miss me more (?) and he's ok for waiting for me for years (to move there, i think) because "knowing he's in my heart is all that matters"...well, it's not all that matters to me, and the fact he can't be here to support me when i need him is feeding my unhappiness. I'm not sure i can take it anymore.
> 
> Another of my friends just got engaged and bought a house and, while i'm happy for her (no, i am), it's not helping. I'm the only one of my friends whose still living at home, without a car, a job they like/career or, potentially, a boyfriend. I feel like i'm failing at life and I don't know how I got so far behind. I've got 2 interviews (so far) to study midwifery (small yay!) but all i can think about is a)what if i don't get a place or b)what if i get a place and can't do it. I'm just really struggling to see the positive in anything at the moment. I'm hoping it's mostly hormonal and will wash over.
> 
> Ok, so, that's the longest post ever, but I wanted to get uptodate and start posting again, because even in just a few weeks, i have missed this community. Thought this was as good a place to start as any.
> 
> Hope y'all alright.



HUGSSSS Laura!! I said a prayer for you last night and you are in my thoughts and prayers! I send you much love dear girl! :wubu:


----------



## Gingembre

Thanks so much for the kind words and rep. It really is appreciated. :happy:


----------



## Gingembre

http://www.dimensionsmagazine.com/forums/showpost.php?p=1815980&postcount=2014


----------



## AuntHen

Gingembre said:


> http://www.dimensionsmagazine.com/forums/showpost.php?p=1815980&postcount=2014



So sorry Laura! I know saying that doesn't really help but I hate that you are hurting 
Lots of hugs and healing!


----------



## spiritangel

That last night was the final episode of spicks n specks the end of an awesome music quiz show and yes it made me cry


----------



## Surlysomething

spiritangel said:


> That last night was the final episode of spicks n specks the end of an awesome music quiz show and yes it made me cry





Girl, you need to get out more. Haha.


----------



## Yakatori

spiritangel said:


> "_That last night was the final episode of spicks n specks the end of an awesome music quiz show and yes it made me cry_"


Interesting concept. Wouldn't be too surprised to see a US version, albeit under a different name..


----------



## spiritangel

Surlysomething said:


> Girl, you need to get out more. Haha.





Yakatori said:


> Interesting concept. Wouldn't be too surprised to see a US version, albeit under a different name..



Ahh youtube it I promise it is worth it  


and even if I did get out more I would still have cried I have watched the show from the start and it was amazing entertainment


----------



## Twilley

No Thanksgiving dinner with the family for me tomorrow, or any time in the foreseeable future. Just more time alone, I guess.


----------



## Lamia

CAMellie said:


> I am very saddened at the fact that I have to ask for my father-in-law's help to get Adrian's mother and brother to set aside their animosity towards me in order for them to attend Adrian's birthday party. Having so much dislike for someone that they barely know and who makes Adrian so happy is very confusing for me...and painful for my husband.



That's really sad....When I was looking at your wedding pics on facebook. I thought to myself his mom does not like Mellie. You could see it in her face. I was hoping I was wrong or that maybe you weren't aware. People are so stupid.


----------



## Surlysomething

Just another day of stupidity and heartbreak.


----------



## Ash

Surlysomething said:


> Girl, you need to get out more. Haha.



That was mean.

Also, I get out quite a lot, and there's still this Chevy commercial that makes me cry every damn time.


----------



## CAMellie

Lamia said:


> That's really sad....When I was looking at your wedding pics on facebook. I thought to myself his mom does not like Mellie. You could see it in her face. I was hoping I was wrong or that maybe you weren't aware. People are so stupid.



Actually, that was his grandmother...and she looked like that because she HATES having her picture taken. His grandmother kept hugging me and welcoming me to the family


----------



## Lamia

CAMellie said:


> Actually, that was his grandmother...and she looked like that because she HATES having her picture taken. His grandmother kept hugging me and welcoming me to the family



 I suck a lot


----------



## Surlysomething

Ashley said:


> That was mean.
> 
> Also, I get out quite a lot, and there's still this Chevy commercial that makes me cry every damn time.


 

Why was that mean?


----------



## CAMellie

Lamia said:


> I suck a lot



That's what SHE said! *wriggles eyebrows*


----------



## rellis10

My brothers' pet cat, 'Mad' Max, passed away earlier today


----------



## Surlysomething

The last glimmer of hope has died.


----------



## BBWMoon

When a relationship isn't going well for me, I feel the need to end it...

Guess where this one is heading...


----------



## tigerlily

In getting an early stab at my resolution to try to be less flakey and more attentive to my friends, I found that in all liklihood a former friend of mine was talking shit to a current friend of mine. Which, on it's own, wouldn't bother me except that my currrent friend seems to believe her. Fukityfuckitydoo. Nowhere NEAR as close as I thought we were, apparently.


----------



## vrehert

Christmas is getting closer yet again and its the fourth time in a row ill be celebrating it alone. Its bad to not have a purpose or something to work for in life.


----------



## danielson123

The Thanksgiving leftovers have officially run out.


----------



## Gingembre

In true 'it never rains but it pours' style, I discovered a few days ago that my period isn't late due to stress.  A chance encounter with an old friend-with-benefits a few weeks ago combined with a split condom and the business with my dad later that night meaning that I forgot to get the emergency pill means I'm pregnant. I'm getting a termination this week. I'm not telling my parents, so on Thursday night I'll be holed up in my bedroom/bathroom riding it out under the pretence of a stomach bug/really bad period.

I really hope December proves to be a better month than November. I'm not sure how much more stress I can take, to be honest.


----------



## Surlysomething

Gingembre said:


> In true 'it never rains but it pours' style, I discovered a few days ago that my period isn't late due to stress.  A chance encounter with an old friend-with-benefits a few weeks ago combined with a split condom and the business with my dad later that night meaning that I forgot to get the emergency pill means I'm pregnant. I'm getting a termination this week. I'm not telling my parents, so on Thursday night I'll be holed up in my bedroom/bathroom riding it out under the pretence of a stomach bug/really bad period.
> 
> I really hope December proves to be a better month than November. I'm not sure how much more stress I can take, to be honest.


 
Oh geez, i'm so sorry.

I hope things ease up a bit for you in the New Year. You deserve a break.


----------



## Mathias

I can't go on my schools shopping trip to New York because they can't accommodate my powerchair. Apparently I didn't give them enough notice that I wanted to go. I wasn't even aware that I even needed to do that in the first place. Student trips should mean ALL students can go, able bodied or not. Not to mention they still took my money and gave me a ticket. Fucking assholes. I was looking forward to this all semester. :really sad:


----------



## penguin

I'm tired, cranky and hormonal. It's one of Those Days and I have Things To Do and I just want to sleep.


----------



## BBWMoon

I did it. I ended the relationship. 

Now I should be happy.


----------



## Surlysomething

Mathias said:


> I can't go on my schools shopping trip to New York because they can't accommodate my powerchair. Apparently I didn't give them enough notice that I wanted to go. I wasn't even aware that I even needed to do that in the first place. Student trips should mean ALL students can go, able bodied or not. Not to mention they still took my money and gave me a ticket. Fucking assholes. I was looking forward to this all semester. :really sad:


 

That's really shitty. They should bend over backwards to accomadate you.


----------



## CastingPearls

One thing that I've learned about grief is that it truly doesn't get better in stages...not really. It comes and goes, ebbs and flows and there's no rhyme or reason. You could have a great day and a word, an image or a scent or song can throw you off and destroy you. Literally.


----------



## CAMellie

CastingPearls said:


> One thing that I've learned about grief is that it truly doesn't get better in stages...not really. It comes and goes, ebbs and flows and there's no rhyme or reason. You could have a great day and a word, an image or a scent or song can throw you off and destroy you. Literally.



So very, very true. *hugs*


----------



## HottiMegan

I'm sad and scared. Alex's speech therapist wants him to go through a diagnosis/examination/testing process with the school district to determine what's up with him. I have supsected aspergers or mild autism but to have someone "in the know" to say it saddens me so much. I just can't understand why god would burden our family with two special needs children, both with totally different needs. It is so hard some days.


----------



## imfree

I replied to a fwd from Mary, my friend of over 30 years, Dean's, daughter and she told me Dean has 4th Stage liver disease in her reply to me.


----------



## Mathias

This may seem trivial compared to other people's posts in this thread, but nothing is cheering me up. Nothing.


----------



## CAMellie

Mathias said:


> This may seem trivial compared to other people's posts in this thread, but nothing is cheering me up. Nothing.



Sadness can only be measured by the person feeling it...your post is not trivial, hun. I wish there was something I could say or do to make you feel better.


----------



## mimosa

Mathias said:


> This may seem trivial compared to other people's posts in this thread, but nothing is cheering me up. Nothing.



Would it help if I pressed my boobies against you?  No? But my boobies are magic! LOL Hugs Matt. May you feel my prayer and God's love surround you. xoxox


----------



## moore2me

Mathias said:


> This may seem trivial compared to other people's posts in this thread, but nothing is cheering me up. Nothing.



*Mathias, Why don't you take this injustice the school has done to you and make it your cause? Work to get it corrected so that in the future these ignorant people at adminstration will not do the same bad to others? You have the ability to communicate, to write, to research and you will be a good spokesperson. Others will not be blessed in such ways. Use your gifts and your wicked (Tasmanian) sense of humor to fight the school's administration dragon. Become St. George and attack/kill the dragon.*

Tell your story to everyone that will hear it. File a class action suit if no one will listen to you. Seek free legal advice from a public defender. Give them no money. Give this cause your time, your energy, your heart, your power to make a difference for disabled men/women or girls/boys coming thru the system in the future.


----------



## shinyapple

Sometime in the last few days, my give-a-damn got busted. Work is awesome, but I've lost my drive for school. I don't know if it's the class itself, the irritating and ignorant opinions of my fellow students, or just the general blahs, but I'm so over it. I don't want to finish this project, I don't want to work with my team, and I am seriously thinking I either need to just take a break or consider going online for a while. Perhaps collaborating with a learning team who is not local would be helpful as my ethics and opinions are rather dramatically different than a significant number of the people I am encountering. Cultural Diversity is NOT a fun subject with the uber conservative set.

Meh. Screw 'em. I'll tank this one and deal with it later. A phone call to my academic adviser may help sort things out on my lunch hour later.


----------



## yoopergirl

After 8 different types of antibiotics, including pills, shots, and IV treatments, the leg infection I've been battling for the past month refuses to disappear. My leg is extremely sore, wearing shoes is painful, and medical bills are starting to build up. And with no health insurance an only a month left at my job, all I can hope is that the hospitals' Uncompensated Care programs will cover the costs.


----------



## Mathias

mimosa said:


> Would it help if I pressed my boobies against you?  No? But my boobies are magic! LOL Hugs Matt. May you feel my prayer and God's love surround you. xoxox



That may help a little bit, I must say.  Thank you Mimi. You're such a sweetheart.



CAMellie said:


> Sadness can only be measured by the person feeling it...your post is not trivial, hun. I wish there was something I could say or do to make you feel better.



Thanks Mellie.



moore2me said:


> *Mathias, Why don't you take this injustice the school has done to you and make it your cause? Work to get it corrected so that in the future these ignorant people at adminstration will not do the same bad to others? You have the ability to communicate, to write, to research and you will be a good spokesperson. Others will not be blessed in such ways. Use your gifts and your wicked (Tasmanian) sense of humor to fight the school's administration dragon. Become St. George and attack/kill the dragon.*
> 
> Tell your story to everyone that will hear it. File a class action suit if no one will listen to you. Seek free legal advice from a public defender. Give them no money. Give this cause your time, your energy, your heart, your power to make a difference for disabled men/women or girls/boys coming thru the system in the future.



I've already demanded that for any and all future events, regardless of whether or not I'm even attending them, it should be mandatory that they get handicapped buses. I made it known to them that I thought it was ridiculous that the school doesn't already do this (especially since tuition is so high) and that it was ridiculous that I even needed to give them two weeks notice. I asked to be placed on all trips for senior week trips, but it isn't like that's of any consolation to me right now. That trip is all the way in May.

Once my last 3 finals are taken care of I'm writing an article about this for my school's newspaper. It would most likely make the school look pretty bad. What happened to me a few days ago isn't the worst thing that this school has done to me by a longshot. At this point I don't care how badly it'd make them look. Enough is enough.


----------



## SMA413

Today marks the one year anniversary of probably one of the worst days of my life. I never thought I'd be one of those girls who would get hit by their boyfriend. Even though it's been that long, it only takes a second for everything to come back to me and take the breath out of my lungs.


----------



## rellis10

Mathias said:


> I've already demanded that for any and all future events, regardless of whether or not I'm even attending them, it should be mandatory that they get handicapped buses. I made it known to them that I thought it was ridiculous that the school doesn't already do this (especially since tuition is so high) and that it was ridiculous that I even needed to give them two weeks notice. I asked to be placed on all trips for senior week trips, but it isn't like that's of any consolation to me right now. That trip is all the way in May.
> 
> Once my last 3 finals are taken care of I'm writing an article about this for my school's newspaper. It would most likely make the school look pretty bad. What happened to me a few days ago isn't the worst thing that this school has done to me by a longshot. At this point I don't care how badly it'd make them look. Enough is enough.



While your whole situation sounds really bad, I have to say that your attitude about it is just right. They need to be told in no uncertain terms what they should be doing and I wouldn't care if the article made them look bad or not, in fact it may be exactly what they need to make the change. Good luck man.


----------



## Linda

I was going to surprise him with dinner and a movie tonight but he lied again and didn't do what he was supposed to do so now we all lose out on a good time. Now we are home doing third grade homework and I am forced to be tough mom. *grumbles* I hate being tough mom.


----------



## CAMellie

Betrayal hurts...but almost never more so than when the betrayer is a family member.


----------



## CastingPearls

How do you just stop talking to someone you care about, for no reason? How? I just can't comprehend it.


----------



## snuggletiger

Linda said:


> I was going to surprise him with dinner and a movie tonight but he lied again and didn't do what he was supposed to do so now we all lose out on a good time. Now we are home doing third grade homework and I am forced to be tough mom. *grumbles* I hate being tough mom.



too bad ya just can't tell him "hey smarten up"


----------



## moore2me

Mathias said:


> That may help a little bit, I must say.  Thank you Mimi. You're such a sweetheart.
> 
> Thanks Mellie.
> 
> I've already demanded that for any and all future events, regardless of whether or not I'm even attending them, it should be mandatory that they get handicapped buses. I made it known to them that I thought it was ridiculous that the school doesn't already do this (especially since tuition is so high) and that it was ridiculous that I even needed to give them two weeks notice. I asked to be placed on all trips for senior week trips, but it isn't like that's of any consolation to me right now. That trip is all the way in May.
> 
> *Once my last 3 finals are taken care of I'm writing an article about this for my school's newspaper. It would most likely make the school look pretty bad.* What happened to me a few days ago isn't the worst thing that this school has done to me by a longshot. At this point I don't care how badly it'd make them look. Enough is enough.



Don't let the violation go too long in case you want to be part of a class action suit or file a complaint against the school. (There may be a statue of limitations on the time a matter can be grieved or taken to a hearing.)

The school is most likely in violation of the Civil Rights Act that prohibits using federal or state funds in a way that discriminates against handicapped students. You can look up more information at the following locations . . . .

Below is from http://edocket.access.gpo.gov/2010/2010-21821.htm

See 42 U.S.C 12149; 42 U.S.C. 12164. Title II, 
which this rule addresses, applies to State and local government entities, and, in subtitle A, protects qualified individuals with disabilities from discrimination on the basis of disability in services, programs, and activities provided by State and local government entities.

and consult the Office For Civil Rights in Education/Students With Disabilities
http://www2.ed.gov/about/offices/list/ocr/504faq.html

--------------------------------------------------------

Just to get a little taste of what the lawmakers intent was in writing these regs, here is some of their thoughts on problems such as Mathias ran into.

"*Some of the most frequently cited qualitative benefits of increased access are the increase in one's personal sense of dignity that arises from increased access and the decrease in possibly humiliating incidents due to accessibility barriers. Struggling to join classmates on a stage, to use a bathroom with too little clearance, or to enter a swimming pool all negatively affect a person's sense of independence and can lead to humiliating accidents, derisive comments, or embarrassment.

These humiliations, together with feelings of being stigmatized as different or inferior from being relegated to use other, less comfortable or pleasant elements of a facility (such as a bathroom instead of a kitchen sink for rinsing a coffee mug at work), all have a negative effect on persons with disabilities*."

Above quoted from http://edocket.access.gpo.gov/2010/2010-21821.htm

---------------------------------------------------------------



rellis10 said:


> While your whole situation sounds really bad, I have to say that your attitude about it is just right. They need to be told in no uncertain terms what they should be doing and I wouldn't care if the article made them look bad or not, in fact it may be exactly what they need to make the change. Good luck man.



*- Some people respond to being called out in the public press.
- Some people respond to being nailed in the pocketbook.
- Some people will not truly fix a wrong unless they are forced to by a higher authority.
- Some people need (deserve) all of the above.*

More references
http://www2.ed.gov/policy/rights/guid/ocr/disability.html
http://www2.ed.gov/policy/rights/reg/ocr/edlite-28cfr35.html


----------



## QueenB

i just miss him.
i can't stop listening to this. it's making me too reminiscent, which is my downfall.


----------



## Mathias

moore2me said:


> Don't let the violation go too long in case you want to be part of a class action suit or file a complaint against the school. (There may be a statue of limitations on the time a matter can be grieved or taken to a hearing.)
> 
> The school is most likely in violation of the Civil Rights Act that prohibits using federal or state funds in a way that discriminates against handicapped students. You can look up more information at the following locations . . . .
> 
> Below is from http://edocket.access.gpo.gov/2010/2010-21821.htm
> 
> See 42 U.S.C 12149; 42 U.S.C. 12164. Title II,
> which this rule addresses, applies to State and local government entities, and, in subtitle A, protects qualified individuals with disabilities from discrimination on the basis of disability in services, programs, and activities provided by State and local government entities.
> 
> and consult the Office For Civil Rights in Education/Students With Disabilities
> http://www2.ed.gov/about/offices/list/ocr/504faq.html
> 
> --------------------------------------------------------
> 
> Just to get a little taste of what the lawmakers intent was in writing these regs, here is some of their thoughts on problems such as Mathias ran into.
> 
> "*Some of the most frequently cited qualitative benefits of increased access are the increase in one's personal sense of dignity that arises from increased access and the decrease in possibly humiliating incidents due to accessibility barriers. Struggling to join classmates on a stage, to use a bathroom with too little clearance, or to enter a swimming pool all negatively affect a person's sense of independence and can lead to humiliating accidents, derisive comments, or embarrassment.
> 
> These humiliations, together with feelings of being stigmatized as different or inferior from being relegated to use other, less comfortable or pleasant elements of a facility (such as a bathroom instead of a kitchen sink for rinsing a coffee mug at work), all have a negative effect on persons with disabilities*."
> 
> Above quoted from http://edocket.access.gpo.gov/2010/2010-21821.htm
> 
> ---------------------------------------------------------------
> 
> 
> 
> *- Some people respond to being called out in the public press.
> - Some people respond to being nailed in the pocketbook.
> - Some people will not truly fix a wrong unless they are forced to by a higher authority.
> - Some people need (deserve) all of the above.*
> 
> More references
> http://www2.ed.gov/policy/rights/guid/ocr/disability.html
> http://www2.ed.gov/policy/rights/reg/ocr/edlite-28cfr35.html



Thanks for the information. I'm NOT letting this go. Today would've been the day I would have gone on the trip so needless to say, I'm pretty upset right now.


----------



## moore2me

Mathias, I hope I am not aggravating you or pouring salt on your wounds, but I have one more suggestion.

Document what went on at the field trip by interviewing classmates. Concentrate on things they learned and things that helped with their education and improved their chances to succeed in the chosen fields. Ask them what they would have lost had they not have gone. You can easily record this on a webcam or or a videocamera. It will be easier to do this now while you classmates are together before they graduate. 

Written documentation is eqully important by keeping a diary with dates and facts. Concentrate on how you (or others) were harmed by the discrimination. Keep a paper copy of your notes from DIMS too because you did pour your heart out here and grieve your losses from missing the field trip.

(I know I have listed a lot to do, but I see the potential for a book here in addition to a newspaper article and class action and/or civil right lawsuit.) But don't get overcome if this all seems too much - just pick one or two and start small. And, again don't get depressed because you missed the field trip. May this was God calling you to a higher purpose.


----------



## Mathias

moore2me said:


> Mathias, I hope I am not aggravating you or pouring salt on your wounds, but I have one more suggestion.
> 
> Document what went on at the field trip by interviewing classmates. Concentrate on things they learned and things that helped with their education and improved their chances to succeed in the chosen fields. Ask them what they would have lost had they not have gone. You can easily record this on a webcam or or a videocamera. It will be easier to do this now while you classmates are together before they graduate.
> 
> Written documentation is eqully important by keeping a diary with dates and facts. Concentrate on how you (or others) were harmed by the discrimination. Keep a paper copy of your notes from DIMS too because you did pour your heart out here and grieve your losses from missing the field trip.
> 
> (I know I have listed a lot to do, but I see the potential for a book here in addition to a newspaper article and class action and/or civil right lawsuit.) But don't get overcome if this all seems too much - just pick one or two and start small. And, again don't get depressed because you missed the field trip. May this was God calling you to a higher purpose.



This was only a Christmas shopping trip so nothing really of educational value. It's just that I can't drive and even though I'm starting the process of that, it'll take awhile knowing that I'll need to be evaluated, the proper driving controls for me will need to be determined and the process of getting a car makes it seem like driving will be a bit of a ways off . 

With this trip I could have gone wherever I wanted in New York on my own completely. Most would take that for granted, but I rarely go anywhere because I always depend on someone else to take me there and back. Not to mention I don't like having to ask anyone to go out of their way for me to begin with. Trips like this hardly happen for me. I've got plenty pictures and video to take to the school's news paper for this.


----------



## mimosa

This evening my son told me something that really hurt my feelings. Oh well, he is just a little boy.....but coming to him...it really hurt my little heart beating in my big body. :really sad::sad:


----------



## TexasTrouble

I know this is ridiculous in the greater scheme of things, but I just got back from hanging out with a friend and her husband. My friend is quite thin and the sweetest lady in the world. She was complimenting me on how I looked tonight (classes are over with for the semester, so I think I look a lot more relaxed) and kidding me that I should start looking for someone to date. She suggested that maybe my standards are too high and maybe that's why I must say no when guys ask me out. I laughed and changed the subject, but part of me just wanted to cry and tell her that, no, honey, I'm not telling guys no when they ask me out. Nobody's asking me out. Sigh. I'm ridiculous.


----------



## Tracyarts

One of my old cats is sick tonight, I've been trying to introduce a new brand of food to them, gradually alternating cans of the new with cans of their old brand, and I guess her stomach just won't tolerate it. So far, nothing makes me think that it might be more than a case of food intolerance, but still it's sad to see her so miserable. It's back to nothing but the old brand, if she isn't feeling better by Monday or Tuesday, she'll have to go to the vet. I'm sure it's just the food, but at her age (14) I worry about her health.

Tracy


----------



## Jeeshcristina

Today feels like Cristina and the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. KFC was out of fried chicken, and I can't find a Christmas dress. Finals only exacerbate the problem.


----------



## Surlysomething

Spontaneous crying on my drive home.

When did I start acting 17 again?


----------



## CastingPearls

Jeeshcristina said:


> Today feels like Cristina and the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. KFC was out of fried chicken, and I can't find a Christmas dress. Finals only exacerbate the problem.


I can never understand how KFC can run out of the main product they sell. That's happened with me a few times too.


----------



## Lamia

Tracyarts said:


> One of my old cats is sick tonight, I've been trying to introduce a new brand of food to them, gradually alternating cans of the new with cans of their old brand, and I guess her stomach just won't tolerate it. So far, nothing makes me think that it might be more than a case of food intolerance, but still it's sad to see her so miserable. It's back to nothing but the old brand, if she isn't feeling better by Monday or Tuesday, she'll have to go to the vet. I'm sure it's just the food, but at her age (14) I worry about her health.
> 
> Tracy



My two cats are 20 and 18 and they have the same problem. They throw up so much now that I just went to KRoger and bought a roasted chicken and tore that up and gave them that each day...no more throwing up. A box of whiska pouches is 5 bucks...a roasted chicken is five bucks they last about the same amount of time. The cats love it.


----------



## Jeeshcristina

CastingPearls said:


> I can never understand how KFC can run out of the main product they sell. That's happened with me a few times too.



I think we need to complain, and get free chicken!


----------



## Tracyarts

" My two cats are 20 and 18 and they have the same problem. They throw up so much now that I just went to KRoger and bought a roasted chicken and tore that up and gave them that each day...no more throwing up. "

It may be time to give that a try, at least with this kitty. She's doing better though. She's kept water and the usual brand of food down for 24 hours now without any more stomach issues. I guess the new food did not agree with her whatsoever. I've heard of cats having stomach upsets with new food, but this was a pretty extreme case. The vet said no need to bring her in unless she has a relapse, so that's good news.

Tracy


----------



## spiritangel

That I have slow net at the time tim posts the new tag first page of comments always wins prizes I would love to win something from the prize stash goodness even if it was just like little and not worth much

stooopid slow net always ends me on page 3 

silly I know but it does make me sad


----------



## Mishty

My little cousin Ashley, turned seventeen two weeks ago, yesterday she was diagnosed with bulimia because I caught her purging on Thanksgiving, she physically attacked me and said if the clinic made her fat like me, she'd kill herself. 

Mama's best friend Tricia, who I've called Other Mother since I was around five, has lung and liver cancer. I may have to pray to someone higher for the first time in a long time because Ma just can't handle any more death at the moment. 


Being sad is making me sad.


----------



## Mathias

There's some EPA commercials running where the sounds of babies coughing and wheezing can be heard and it shows a baby carriage is seen in a polluted area. It's kind of upsetting.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Mishty said:


> My little cousin Ashley, turned seventeen two weeks ago, yesterday she was diagnosed with bulimia because I caught her purging on Thanksgiving, she physically attacked me and said if the clinic made her fat like me, she'd kill herself.
> 
> Mama's best friend Tricia, who I've called Other Mother since I was around five, has lung and liver cancer. I may have to pray to someone higher for the first time in a long time because Ma just can't handle any more death at the moment.
> 
> 
> Being sad is making me sad.


Oh my god, Mish, I'm so sorry. That's so much pain to deal with.  ((((((((((Mish))))))))))))) If you need a shoulder or an ear, you know where I am, honey.


----------



## HottiMegan

I just got a phone call from my aunt in law. She's like a mother in law. She has been battling breast cancer all year. She's clear of that but the cancer has moved to her brain. So basically we talked today to learn she's got 6 months to a year left.:really sad::really sad::sad::sad:


----------



## CAMellie

HottiMegan said:


> I just got a phone call from my aunt in law. She's like a mother in law. She has been battling breast cancer all year. She's clear of that but the cancer has moved to her brain. So basically we talked today to learn she's got 6 months to a year left.:really sad::really sad::sad::sad:



I'm so VERY sorry, Megan *hugs*


----------



## Mathias

HottiMegan said:


> I just got a phone call from my aunt in law. She's like a mother in law. She has been battling breast cancer all year. She's clear of that but the cancer has moved to her brain. So basically we talked today to learn she's got 6 months to a year left.:really sad::really sad::sad::sad:



Oh Megan, I'm so, so sorry to hear that. :really sad:


----------



## Theatrmuse/Kara

Oh Megan. So sorry to hear this. There, but for the grace of God, goes I. I just said to my hubby, last year this time, no one was certain I would be here this Christmas. There is no rhyme or reason for some things in life.
HUGS, Kara


----------



## Surlysomething

HottiMegan said:


> I just got a phone call from my aunt in law. She's like a mother in law. She has been battling breast cancer all year. She's clear of that but the cancer has moved to her brain. So basically we talked today to learn she's got 6 months to a year left.:really sad::really sad::sad::sad:



Big hugs, Megan

I know how sad you're feeling.


----------



## Shosh

I have almost finished eating all of the white chocolate covered bits and bites my friend Kimberly brought over today as a Christmas gift.


----------



## littlefairywren

Mishty said:


> My little cousin Ashley, turned seventeen two weeks ago, yesterday she was diagnosed with bulimia because I caught her purging on Thanksgiving, she physically attacked me and said if the clinic made her fat like me, she'd kill herself.
> 
> Mama's best friend Tricia, who I've called Other Mother since I was around five, has lung and liver cancer. I may have to pray to someone higher for the first time in a long time because Ma just can't handle any more death at the moment.
> 
> 
> Being sad is making me sad.





HottiMegan said:


> I just got a phone call from my aunt in law. She's like a mother in law. She has been battling breast cancer all year. She's clear of that but the cancer has moved to her brain. So basically we talked today to learn she's got 6 months to a year left.:really sad::really sad::sad::sad:



Big soft hugs for the both of you


----------



## Lovelyone

I don't even know how to explain what is making me sad except to say that with family like mine, there is absolutely NO chance of enjoying the holidays. 

My situation is dire to begin with and I know that Christmas has nothing to do with money, presents, or gifts but I can't help to feel bad about not even being able to afford to send out more than a few Christmas cards. Along with that the holidays have become distasteful to me since my Mother died last year. Spending the holidays with family who do not treat you like family makes matters ten times worse. I feel like scrooge. I feel like I just want to slink down under my blankets on December 24th and sleep until January 2nd. If it were possible, I would do just that.


----------



## HottiMegan

CAMellie said:


> I'm so VERY sorry, Megan *hugs*





Mathias said:


> Oh Megan, I'm so, so sorry to hear that. :really sad:





Theatrmuse/Kara said:


> Oh Megan. So sorry to hear this. There, but for the grace of God, goes I. I just said to my hubby, last year this time, no one was certain I would be here this Christmas. There is no rhyme or reason for some things in life.
> HUGS, Kara





Surlysomething said:


> Big hugs, Megan
> 
> I know how sad you're feeling.





littlefairywren said:


> Big soft hugs for the both of you



Thank you all very much. Cancer sucks. I cried a lot yesterday. You really realize how much you love someone when you know their time is limited. We live 100 miles apart and will be going down to see her a lot more. I am just so sad. She kind of took over the role of my mother in law when hubs mom died.


----------



## CAMellie

I've had an overall sad weekend. Yesterday was 7 months since my momma passed away... and today it's been 9 years since I lost my husband Kerry to cancer. I've moved on, and recently gotten re-married, but it still hurts on certain anniversaries.


----------



## moore2me

HottiMegan said:


> Thank you all very much. Cancer sucks. I cried a lot yesterday. You really realize how much you love someone when you know their time is limited. We live 100 miles apart and will be going down to see her a lot more. I am just so sad. She kind of took over the role of my mother in law when hubs mom died.



I am sorry to hear about your loved one and substitute mother-in-law having terminal cancer. Cancer is one of the great foes a lot of us will fight in our short lifespans - either our own cancer or a close relative's. 

You have also been thru a lot lately with both your boys and this too has got to be adding on your stress level and burden. I will share with you what some advice my mom did with her adult children. When you have your own kids, one of the great lessons in life you can teach them is how to deal with our own and other's mortality. This is something that children have a lot of trouble with and showing them how to talk to a person that you know you will lose (treat them like they are precious, don't avoid them) is what they need to see and hear. Being sad and crying is okay, but letting the kids know how to deal with grief as children (it depends on their age and maturity) is a mother and father's difficult but important task.


----------



## HottiMegan

Thank you. We told Max that she's not going to be around for a long time. He cried in our arms for a good half hour. We are not going to shy away from her. We watched hubby's mom drift away a few years ago. She had stroke issues related to her diabetes and she kept getting worse as time went on. We already have plans to see aunt in law a week from today. We usually try to get together whenever we have to see Max's specialists down in Sacramento. (That's quite often with Max's recent surgery issues.. and now we're planning another one early 2012) Alex is too young to get what's going on. He just gets nervous when we are crying about her illness.


----------



## Twilley

Ugh, everything lately.

Feeling so self destructive


----------



## ScreamingChicken

I have the proverbial laundry list going on right now.

The IRS screwed up my refund and it'll be another 8-12 weeks before I'll see it. I was really counting on that for my move out money (depost, furniture) but I can't do that any way til the divorce is finalized, which brings me to...

My divorce not being finalized til the early part of next month. If my soon to be ex had indeed sent off the paper work when she said she did instead of seating on it for weeks, it would have been done by now. I am just ready to close that book. I am tired of her shenanigans including...

Her screwing with the visitation agreement. Because she wanted to pull a power play, it'll be almost three weeks between multiple visits with me and my kiddos for this month.

It's almost over with but January and 2012 can't get here fast enough to suit me.


----------



## Lovelyone

Christmas is making me sad. I've had 5 dreary Christmases in a row. Long story about finances and the economy, loss of family members, being alone on the holidays, friends who only seem to want to be friends when it is convenient for them, and how sad it is that the Christmas cards that I used to receive (which I relied on cheering me up at this time of year) have dwindled to practically nothing. Enough...time to go nibble on a Christmas cookie.


----------



## BBWbonnie

That I miss my family soo much:sad::sad::sad:


----------



## Linda

My friend feels so little self worth that she thinks she id going to find it in multiple random men. It is only a quick fix to a much deeper problem. She is a great girl and I wish she could see that.


----------



## ScreamingChicken

I just wish she could see herself through my eyes. <sighs>


----------



## Saoirse

I just talked to someone I regularly dog-sit for... one of the dogs (they're both Great Danes) has bone cancer and they don't know if he's going to make it to Christmas. Im supposed to be watching them right after Christmas, so she wanted me to know that depending on his health, they might not be going away.

I love these dogs so much. I've been taking care of them for years! And this one... he's just a big mush pie that loves to be loved. He's big and drooly and he likes to be in the middle of everything, but he just looks at you with his big goofy Dane head and dark brown eyes and huge hanging lips, with drool smears all over his face... and you fall in love. It just hurts knowing that he wont be around much longer.


----------



## lushluv

A-holes that don't know me from a hole in the wall yet judge me anyway.


----------



## penguin

My sister's ten year relationship has ended. My heart breaks for her, for my BIL and their kids.


----------



## CastingPearls

I don't feel like I have a home. And now I have car trouble and might not be able to afford to drive to my brother's for Christmas Eve.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

CastingPearls said:


> I don't feel like I have a home. And now I have car trouble and might not be able to afford to drive to my brother's for Christmas Eve.



You have a home, honey. ((((((((((((Lainey)))))))))))) You are always, always welcome wherever I am. :wubu: I am so sorry you are feeling like this. I wish I were rich so I could help, but I just spent all my money getting my car fixed as well.  I know that feeling too well. Any chance your brother would come get you? Surely seeing you would be worth the trip.... Love you.


----------



## mimosa

*I am so embarrassed! I misread a message from a very cool person. Then I responded in a very wrong way. If I never hear from them again...I would NOT be surprised. :doh::blush:

Oh well....that's life. 

So how are you? 

Sending hugs and love to all of my broken hearted friends.:wubu::kiss2:*


----------



## penguin

I just spoke to my brother in law and I'm so upset about his relationship with my sister ending, and for how it did. Their relationship ending has me in tears


----------



## mimosa

penguin said:


> I just spoke to my brother in law and I'm so upset about his relationship with my sister ending, and for how it did. Their relationship ending has me in tears



Hugs darling. XOXOXO


----------



## CAMellie

We're watching _Hoarders_ and some of these people are breaking my heart.


----------



## rg770Ibanez

Effing holidays...


----------



## HottiMegan

The house we were going to put an offer on today got an offer in a couple days ago  I loved that house!!


----------



## Jeeshcristina

I can't remember the last truly excellent conversation I had. I miss intelligence.


----------



## Happenstance

Jeeshcristina said:


> I can't remember the last truly excellent conversation I had. I miss intelligence.



Me too. I used to have friends for this purpose, and I lost them somewhere along the way.


----------



## Jeeshcristina

Happenstance said:


> Me too. I used to have friends for this purpose, and I lost them somewhere along the way.



I'm glad I'm not the only one. It seems like I just outgrow friends and can't maintain lasting relationships. I crave constant new stimulation.


----------



## CastingPearls

I can't even put it into words. Just so sad.


----------



## Mathias

CastingPearls said:


> I can't even put it into words. Just so sad.



((((Big Hug))) 

I'm so sorry Elaine.


----------



## danielson123

Well, it looks like no girlfriend for me. Apparently all 4 of the girls me and my friend were hanging out with like _him_. And just today he got as he called it 'the pick of the litter'. Whatever, I'm happy for him. But because he was so flirty with all girls, including the one that I told him I liked, she likes him and apparently not me. We had planned on going out to an arcade later this week (2 girls and me and my friend), but now my friend just wants to go out with the one girl alone. So I ask the girl I like if she'd still like to go, just us, and she says that we had better wait until my friend is available to go. I had to tell her that he was busy, since apparently he won't tell all the girls that he's about to start dating one of them. So that's a shitty sign right there that she won't go unless he's there too.

And I had literally _just_ gotten back from the store where I got her a Christmas gift. I feel like a total loser.


----------



## Lovelyone

Seeing my sister so tired and weak from her cancer treatments makes me sad. She's got about 1/4 inch of hair now, so that's a good thing, but she is just so tired and weak.


----------



## BBWbonnie

I did something wrong and selfish only thinking about my feelings....

But now I have decided to change all that and it won't ever happen again


----------



## CAMellie

Adrian has to work Sunday so I'll be all alone on Christmas


----------



## HottiMegan

I don't like being yelled at with extreme rage behind it. It really sucks.


----------



## Linda

My friend is in so much pain right now.


----------



## WVMountainrear

I have a friend whose 8-year-old son has had cancer for over a year. They found out at the beginning of this month that despite aggressive treatment, the cancer has progressed and spread in multiple sites around his body. His blood counts have been too low, even in spite of transfusions, to resume any chemo. In the last 6 months, they've taken a make-A-wish foundation trip to Atlantis, swam with dolphins at Disney, and smiled through their fear. That fear has increased with each passing week that he's too weak to take any treatments. Tonight, as they were making Christmas cookies, they heard drums outside...a marching band, a fire truck, police car, Santa Claus, and several of my friend's coworkers were in front of the house bringing them some Christmas cheer. It hurts me to think that this may be this wonderful 8-year-old's last Christmas on this Earth. And it's such an amazing dichotomy that a child so physically infirm and vulnerable has so much strength and life in him. 

It seems like I've spent a lot of time praying for miracles lately...but it never seems like enough.


----------



## Lovelyone

My prayers go out to your friend and her family, Lovelylady.


My sister is having cancer related surgery today. They were supposed to be finished by 4 and we still haven't heard any news about her yet. I am worried a bit.


----------



## georgedepp

I am sad and disturbed that I can not seem to get over a girl I've only dating for two months. We have incredible past, physically and mentally. But we wanted different things emotionally. I ended it this past Wednesday


----------



## Deacone

I am REALLY SAD right now (and have been since friday) because my gorgeous fiance J_JP_M is in Guatemala for his brother's wedding and with his family for christmas and i wont get to see him until jan the 4th....2 weeks away from him is a nightmare so far :'(


----------



## littlefairywren

Deacone said:


> I am REALLY SAD right now (and have been since friday) because my gorgeous fiance J_JP_M is in Guatemala for his brother's wedding and with his family for christmas and i wont get to see him until jan the 4th....2 weeks away from him is a nightmare so far :'(



I am sure he will be thinking of you and missing you just as much, honey. Your reunion will be that much sweeter for the long absence.


----------



## Lovelyone

scars are making me sad.


----------



## MisticalMisty

I know it sounds stupid, but the thought of taking down the tree and decorations makes me feel like I'm going to sink into a deep, dark depression.

BLah


----------



## WVMountainrear

lovelylady78 said:


> I have a friend whose 8-year-old son has had cancer for over a year. They found out at the beginning of this month that despite aggressive treatment, the cancer has progressed and spread in multiple sites around his body. His blood counts have been too low, even in spite of transfusions, to resume any chemo. In the last 6 months, they've taken a make-A-wish foundation trip to Atlantis, swam with dolphins at Disney, and smiled through their fear. That fear has increased with each passing week that he's too weak to take any treatments. Tonight, as they were making Christmas cookies, they heard drums outside...a marching band, a fire truck, police car, Santa Claus, and several of my friend's coworkers were in front of the house bringing them some Christmas cheer. It hurts me to think that this may be this wonderful 8-year-old's last Christmas on this Earth. And it's such an amazing dichotomy that a child so physically infirm and vulnerable has so much strength and life in him.
> 
> It seems like I've spent a lot of time praying for miracles lately...but it never seems like enough.



Gabriel was hospitalized a couple days ago, and I just heard the news that they are moving him to comfort care as he prepares to end his battle with cancer. They just want him to know that he's loved. And that they're proud of him for his courageousness and willingness to live life to the fullest. My heart is breaking for them.


----------



## ScreamingChicken

lovelylady78 said:


> Gabriel was hospitalized a couple days ago, and I just heard the news that they are moving him to comfort care as he prepares to end his battle with cancer. They just want him to know that he's loved. And that they're proud of him for his courageousness and willingness to live life to the fullest. My heart is breaking for them.



Damn...


----------



## spiritangel

lovelylady78 said:


> Gabriel was hospitalized a couple days ago, and I just heard the news that they are moving him to comfort care as he prepares to end his battle with cancer. They just want him to know that he's loved. And that they're proud of him for his courageousness and willingness to live life to the fullest. My heart is breaking for them.



It is the most heartwrenching thing to watch a child go through, to lose a child who has so much life and love inside. I went to a school where I remember losing at least one friend a year to cancer and having to attend their funerals was such a part of my ordinary school life. Be reminded to cherish every precious moment of life. To have courage in the face of even the hardest moments and remember to live life with passion because I have always felt these are the lessons that these angels teach us. Much much love and many hugs I know there are no words for occassions such as these.


----------



## imfree

lovelylady78 said:


> Gabriel was hospitalized a couple days ago, and I just heard the news that they are moving him to comfort care as he prepares to end his battle with cancer. They just want him to know that he's loved. And that they're proud of him for his courageousness and willingness to live life to the fullest. My heart is breaking for them.





spiritangel said:


> It is the most heartwrenching thing to watch a child go through, to lose a child who has so much life and love inside. I went to a school where I remember losing at least one friend a year to cancer and having to attend their funerals was such a part of my ordinary school life. Be reminded to cherish every precious moment of life. To have courage in the face of even the hardest moments and remember to live life with passion because I have always felt these are the lessons that these angels teach us. Much much love and many hugs I know there are no words for occassions such as these.



There are no words, just tears. May we be forever changed by the love and courage those precious little angels showed us in the far too short time they were with us.


----------



## HottiMegan

Hubby's cousin's wife had pre-eclampsia and they took the baby at 31 weeks.. Baby is getting emergency intestinal surgery right now. I feel for them. This pregnancy has been a roller coaster. They originally thought the she had a miscarriage but didn't. Then the bp issues. Now this. I feel for them. The baby and mom are in different hospitals. It makes me so sad because i know what she's going through. I was separated from Max for 3 days and it was so hard.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

lovelylady78 said:


> Gabriel was hospitalized a couple days ago, and I just heard the news that they are moving him to comfort care as he prepares to end his battle with cancer. They just want him to know that he's loved. And that they're proud of him for his courageousness and willingness to live life to the fullest. My heart is breaking for them.



I am so sorry, C.  I am tearing up. How incredibly hard. It is just... so... not... FAIR that such a sweet, brave child is being taken from the earth. :really sad:


----------



## moore2me

lovelylady78 said:


> Gabriel was hospitalized a couple days ago, and I just heard the news that they are moving him to comfort care as he prepares to end his battle with cancer. They just want him to know that he's loved. And that they're proud of him for his courageousness and willingness to live life to the fullest. My heart is breaking for them.



A very close friend of mine and his wife lost their daughter to gun violence. After the girl's death, her mom and dad went thru a long period of grieving and suffering. They both needed their friends to listen to to them and just be with them. (Some of their friends were uncomfortable around them because of their loss and did not know what to do around the couple - so they avoided them.)

*You don't have to solve their grief. You can't. You just have to listen and be a friend. *Buy them some coffee and let them talk. Visit the grave with them if they want you to. Put flowers on it. If they cry. Comfort them. You have permission to cry too. It's okay. Their child has died -it is the hardest thing for a person to bear. 

It is also natural for them to turn to religion to comfort them. So be prepared to accomodate this if it comes up in conversation. If nothing else refer them to a local professional or listen to the person pray or read from a Bible. *Again, just listening and being there is the best thing a friend can do in this situation.*

I made a note on my family legend that contains birthday reminders (etc.) of when their daughter died. For about ten years, I sent the couple a sympathy card on her DOD (day of death). The first year I even sent them flowers. If this sounds way to grim for some of you guys - if you have lost a loved one like this child, a you will find yourself dreading the anniversary and becoming depressed around the date each year for a long time thereafter.

P.S. My frind eventually had a nervous breakdown months after his daughter's death. His wife did not. He recovered after months of professional counseling and medication. He also became a lay minister in his church. Both he and his wife are now head counselors in support groups for other parents who have also lost children in violence.


----------



## Surlysomething

I'm pretty sure you're just trying to wear me down..force me to give up. Maybe you don't even know you're doing it.
It's sad that you're the first person I think of when something good happens...or when something sad happens.. 

When I realize you're not there or don't care as much as I thought you used to, it's like my heart deflates.

First tears in a few days. Just when you think you're all tapped out, my heart finds another secret reservoir of hurt.


----------



## activistfatgirl

It's completely irrational to be sad about seasons, but here we are in January and I know it's going to be a long couple of months. I hate the cold, dark nights and long for evenings walking in sunshine.


----------



## Surlysomething

lovelylady78 said:


> Gabriel was hospitalized a couple days ago, and I just heard the news that they are moving him to comfort care as he prepares to end his battle with cancer. They just want him to know that he's loved. And that they're proud of him for his courageousness and willingness to live life to the fullest. My heart is breaking for them.


 

I know i'm late...

Poor little dude. I'm glad he's surrounded by love...


sending my thoughts your way
<3


----------



## Deven

This sounds petty:

I decided to try omegle for laughs, and started a 2 hour conversation. He was going to add me on facebook. We exchanged pics, and he disconnected.

It made me feel really ugly...


----------



## Micara

Lost a dear friend to cancer yesterday. She had a persistent cough, went in to have it checked out a year ago, and had Stage 4 lung cancer. Not a smoker, but a vivacious, spirited 57-year-old mother and grandmother that I looked up to. A whole lot. She was beautiful and classy and everything I wanted to be. It's so sad hearing that her light has went out. I will miss her a lot. Cancer is bullshit.


----------



## imfree

Micara said:


> Lost a dear friend to cancer yesterday. She had a persistent cough, went in to have it checked out a year ago, and had Stage 4 lung cancer. Not a smoker, but a vivacious, spirited 57-year-old mother and grandmother that I looked up to. A whole lot. She was beautiful and classy and everything I wanted to be. It's so sad hearing that her light has went out. I will miss her a lot. Cancer is bullshit.



My thoughts and prayers are with you and your friend's family. Lung cancer in a non-smoker is one of the hardest to understand.


----------



## Gingembre

I'm never usually one for a pity party, but I have overheard some really hurtful things from my parents tonight and could really do with some validation. If you've ever experienced my bartending sKiLlZ, thought I was witty/someone worth having around, I would really appreciate it if you could say so now, coz I seem to have hit rock bottom.


----------



## AuntHen

Gingembre said:


> I'm never usually one for a pity party, but I have overheard some really hurtful things from my parents tonight and could really do with some validation. If you've ever experienced my bartending sKiLlZ, thought I was witty/someone worth having around, I would really appreciate it if you could say so now, coz I seem to have hit rock bottom.



HUGS Laura! You are gorgeous, smart, kind and important!!! I mean FREAKING GORGEOUS!! Don't let anyone ever make you think you are not! :kiss2:


----------



## Gingembre

fat9276 said:


> HUGS Laura! You are gorgeous, smart, kind and important!!! I mean FREAKING GORGEOUS!! Don't let anyone ever make you think you are not! :kiss2:



Oh Bri, I wish you lived nearer, you're such a good person. Love you! x


----------



## CastingPearls

Gingembre said:


> I'm never usually one for a pity party, but I have overheard some really hurtful things from my parents tonight and could really do with some validation. If you've ever experienced my bartending sKiLlZ, thought I was witty/someone worth having around, I would really appreciate it if you could say so now, coz I seem to have hit rock bottom.


Hope I'm not too late but you're witty and lovely and I enjoy when you're here and admire what you want to do with your life (midwife) so much. The world is a wonderful place with you in it, Laura. Hugs.


----------



## Gingembre

Thanks Elaine, and to those of you who repped me. I'm all cried out and today is a new day ao I'm trying not to think about it. Going to stay with a friend for the weekend, so its onwards and upwards.


----------



## kaylaisamachine

My thoughts are the only thing keeping me sad. I need to get rid of them.


----------



## shinyapple

Found out the end of last week one of my favorite coworkers was hospitalized last Tuesday with leukemia. He's only twenty-six, married, and has a six month old son. He'll be in for at least the next month, but fortunately it doesn't appear to be the chemo-resistant form of his disease.

Of all the people, why him?


----------



## CleverBomb

Oh dear. 
I hope his treatment goes well.
-Rusty


----------



## HottiMegan

I have a friend who's baby was born with several holes in his heart. One seems to have filled in but two others are enlarging which means surgery. I live too far away to lend my physical support to this friend. I feel so bad for her and what she's going though. I never had to deal with life threatening stuff with Max. He has had 19 procedures but they were so much less serious than heart surgery. I wish i could give her a hug and hold her hand during the hospital stuff. I'm all tears tonight for her because, to an extent, i can relate to her turmoil she's going through. It brings back all that fear and anxiety i get when Max goes into surgery.


----------



## Lovelyone

shinyapple said:


> Found out the end of last week one of my favorite coworkers was hospitalized last Tuesday with leukemia. He's only twenty-six, married, and has a six month old son. He'll be in for at least the next month, but fortunately it doesn't appear to be the chemo-resistant form of his disease.
> 
> Of all the people, why him?



Why anyone?


----------



## CleverBomb

Lovelyone said:


> Why anyone?


This.

-Rusty


----------



## penguin

I'm sending out good thoughts and hugs for all those who need them here.


----------



## SMA413

My ex was finally arrested for assault from when he hit me back in Dec '10 (yay!)... but his mom posted bond and he's already out. :-/


----------



## WVMountainrear

Uncertainty.


----------



## Mishty

Comin' to terms with facts.


----------



## rellis10

Feeling the nerves of having a job interview tomorrow. I didn't feel like this on tuesday because I didn't have the same hopes of getting the job, but this one is different. It's well within what I'm capable of, in fact for once I'm possibly over-qualified. I just worry that if I don't get this job I have no idea who will employ me and how much longer I'll be waiting.


----------



## HottiMegan

:really sad::really sad:We didn't get the house 
We're putting an offer in on another one that's a total long shot. So my hopes are low for a move in the near future for now.


----------



## Gingembre

rellis10 said:


> Feeling the nerves of having a job interview tomorrow. I didn't feel like this on tuesday because I didn't have the same hopes of getting the job, but this one is different. It's well within what I'm capable of, in fact for once I'm possibly over-qualified. I just worry that if I don't get this job I have no idea who will employ me and how much longer I'll be waiting.



Good luck, Rick! I know how frustrating it is not getting jobs you know you're perfectly capable of. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you.



HottiMegan said:


> :really sad::really sad:We didn't get the house
> We're putting an offer in on another one that's a total long shot. So my hopes are low for a move in the near future for now.



Oh NO. Megan, i'm so sorry, i know how excited you were and how much you want to move. ((hugs))


----------



## HDANGEL15

HottiMegan said:


> :really sad::really sad:We didn't get the house
> We're putting an offer in on another one that's a total long shot. So my hopes are low for a move in the near future for now.


*
Missing the first is very common, you missed that one for something BETTER...keep positive...long shots happen all the time in this market!!!!*

:happy:


----------



## CAMellie

1. Both of my husband's part-time jobs have cut his hours WAY down so he's looking for a whole new job...without much luck, so far.

2. I am both sad and FURIOUS that some random guy off the street punched my niece in the face so hard it broke her jaw in 3 places! She had to have surgery to wire her jaw shut. She was just going into a convenience store and the asshole sucker punched her for NO reason!! We have NO idea if he's been caught.


----------



## HottiMegan

I just found out that a friend from an online moms group i've been a part of since i was pregnant with Max passed away suddenly. She had a little girl a little a smidge older that Max. God this day sucks.


----------



## Blackhawk2293

CAMellie said:


> 1. Both of my husband's part-time jobs have cut his hours WAY down so he's looking for a whole new job...without much luck, so far.
> 
> 2. I am both sad and FURIOUS that some random guy off the street punched my niece in the face so hard it broke her jaw in 3 places! She had to have surgery to wire her jaw shut. She was just going into a convenience store and the asshole sucker punched her for NO reason!! We have NO idea if he's been caught.



Number 2 makes me mad more than sad for your niece.

If I was in your neighborhood, I would get a description of the sucker punch guy, do some street canvassing and find his house, then walk right in and beat an apology out of him.

I hope your niece makes a full recovery.


----------



## Surlysomething

Finding out that love mean so little to some people.


----------



## littlefairywren

Surlysomething said:


> Finding out that love mean so little to some people.



Find someone worthy of yours and don't look back. It will happen. I know you hate people being all Pollyanna, but be open to finding love and the Universe will supply.


----------



## Surlysomething

littlefairywren said:


> Find someone worthy of yours and don't look back. It will happen. I know you hate people being all Pollyanna, but be open to finding love and the Universe will supply.



But that's the thing...I gave on it before. _He was the chance I took_. _I opened up for him._


I don't think I can do it again.


----------



## littlefairywren

Surlysomething said:


> But that's the thing...I gave on it before. _He was the chance I took_. _I opened up for him._
> 
> 
> I don't think I can do it again.



I thought that after 18 years of marriage to an abusive man that I didn't deserve love and I would never risk my heart ever again. It broke me and I shut down. You need to heal first and then you will do it again. If you allow yourself to give and receive love it changes you.


----------



## CastingPearls

Surlysomething said:


> But that's the thing...I gave on it before. _He was the chance I took_. _I opened up for him._
> 
> 
> I don't think I can do it again.


You don't think you can right now, and that's okay. You will when you're ready and he's going to appreciate you too.


----------



## spiritangel

rejection sigh oh well will look later and see what other ones I can apply for worth a shot I suppose


----------



## agnieszka

i wanted to go to the gym today but it is raining (what a surprise) and i will not go (i would be soaking, literally, by the time i got there)


----------



## SuperMishe

I'm sad that a friend is giving me the silent treatment. I've texted her, emailed her and sent her PMs but no response. I just saw her online on a different forum and I so badly wanted to PM her again but I decided not to. If she wants to be angry because I un-rsvp'd to something, there's nothing I can do about it. It still makes me sad though...


----------



## BBWbonnie

That I am going to miss someone I care about very much, very soon


----------



## mel

myself. time wasted. bad choices. weakness.


----------



## mimosa

So many sad things happening to my family in Mexico. 

When my son starts acting bratty I can actually say: "Son, your cousins don't have the things we have. So we shouldn't complain."


----------



## mimosa

mel said:


> myself. time wasted. bad choices. weakness.



I understand. Same here. Hugs.


----------



## mossystate

Better question is, what isn't.


----------



## Surlysomething

mossystate said:


> Better question is, what isn't.



Well, hopefully you don't have too much snow where you are.
We got a lot in some parts up here, but luckily I was pretty unscathed.



Feel better, lady.


----------



## Zandoz

Continuing health isssues, inability to sleep, and having to pass on something I've always wanted mostly because of my health


----------



## idontspeakespn

Blue Monday. The saddest day of the year, only the papers say, you have no reason to be sad. Really, you want to take a bet on that, do you? 

1) I just got my final grade back from a paper I wrote last term, 2 points shy of failing, and the pleasant feedback from my lecturer said, 'Infantile'

2) Someone was talking to me on the bus ride home and in the course of the conversation stated, 'You know, us women in our 40's have it rough in society...blah blah blah' I don't know what else she said because there was a roaring in my ears after FOURTY....and I'm not yet THIRTY. WTF 0_o

3) The love of my life just got a girlfriend yesterday, my heart is now in pieces, even after I stupidly thought I had a chance to be with him again. I guess you only get one chance with a soul mate. 

4) The nice bottle of wine I bought to soothe myself from this horrible day busted on the way home because some punk-ass children on the sidewalk were riding on their bikes in circles and knocked me off my ass. 

Yeah, I would call this Blue Monday.


----------



## willowmoon

.... learning of Etta James' passing. I knew she was dealing with the final stages of leukemia and it was only a matter of time ... but it's sad, nevertheless.


----------



## HottiMegan

My depression is flaring up again and making it difficult just to do day to day things. All i want to do is lay in bed and escape.


----------



## SMA413

My boyfriend leaves for Virginia for four months in less than 3 weeks. I'm freaking the fruck out. We haven't been dating all that long- by the time he leaves, we'll have been together for four months, so by the time he gets back in June, we'll have been apart for 50% of our relationship. He's told me that he sees me in his future... but I don't know how he'll feel after being gone for four months. I know the last few months have flown by but I also know that the minute he leaves, the next four months are going to drag out to an eternity.


----------



## Takeshi

I brought up something about my past that I probably shouldn't have, and Imay have offended her about it last night. I just only hope that she can forgive me for it, because I'd never want to hurt her feelings, and I value our friendship very much.


----------



## thatgirl08

The obvious looks of disapproval, disgust and disappointment in reaction to what I look like from all of the people in my life that I care about. I can't even stand to look at myself in the mirror right now.


----------



## Deven

Don't criticize, please.

But I went to see Joe Paterno's casket today, and I completely lost it. The footballer standing at the side put his hand on my shoulder as I walked by.


----------



## Lovelyone

I am sad because most of the men whom I chat with either think I am an idiot, easy, or an on line free therapist. None of them can seem to understand that I am none of the above and that I am looking for something real and not something "on line".


----------



## SMA413

So besides the fact that my boyfriend is leaving in 2 weeks for four months, he just found out that he might deploy to Afghanistan in August, instead of Feb 2013. So that means he'll be in Virginia for four months, home for three months, and then deployed for who knows how long.


----------



## Surlysomething

thatgirl08 said:


> The obvious looks of disapproval, disgust and disappointment in reaction to what I look like from all of the people in my life that I care about. I can't even stand to look at myself in the mirror right now.





I hate your family. 


You're a beautiful, vibrant young lady. :


----------



## Diana_Prince245

SMA413 said:


> So besides the fact that my boyfriend is leaving in 2 weeks for four months, he just found out that he might deploy to Afghanistan in August, instead of Feb 2013. So that means he'll be in Virginia for four months, home for three months, and then deployed for who knows how long.



Hugs, hun


----------



## thatgirl08

Surlysomething said:


> I hate your family.
> 
> 
> You're a beautiful, vibrant young lady. :



Thank you Surly


----------



## theladypoet

My birthday is next Wednesday and it will be the first birthday I celebrate without my Nana. She passed away last October of colon cancer. We were very close and it seems like the closer I get to my birthday the sadder I get, to the point where every little thing makes me burst into tears.


----------



## TwilightStarr

I have been trying everything I can and praying very hard, for my sister to get an apartment where I live but we found out today that it won't happen :*( 
I loathe ridiculous, mean landlords who think they are so much better than the people who pay for them to live the life they do!


----------



## kristineirl

i can't sleep for dick but at least there's a really terrible movie on tv and it's somehow making me feel a tad better. aw yeah bad movies!


----------



## Jeeshcristina

My daddy, a Vietnam vet with three purple hearts who can always fix anything and is my hero, who is tougher than nails, and the one person I can count on no matter what happens in this world, is sick. Really really sick. In over three years of living away from home, he's visited my apartment twice. He feels so bad that he's actually spending the night with me so I can keep an eye on him. It's heartbreaking to hear him say he can't sleep because he's afraid he isn't going to wake up.  I just wish I could fix him.


----------



## rellis10

I feel poetic, which would be good if not for 2 things. 1) The poetry in my head isn't very happy...at all. And 2) I have other writing that REALLY needs to be finished and is preventing me from writing any poetry right now.


----------



## spiritangel

rellis10 said:


> I feel poetic, which would be good if not for 2 things. 1) The poetry in my head isn't very happy...at all. And 2) I have other writing that REALLY needs to be finished and is preventing me from writing any poetry right now.



let the poetry out is my advice muses often have the worst timing, but I find if I try to fight it I cant really do anythhing else until I let it out

hugs


----------



## Lovelyone

P-M-S is making me sad.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

I lost my bag, somewhere in my room, which is a black hole, and can't afford another one.


----------



## spiritangel

waking up with a headache, not being able to go back to sleep even after cancelling my appointment and just feeling ick in general


----------



## rellis10

spiritangel said:


> let the poetry out is my advice muses often have the worst timing, but I find if I try to fight it I cant really do anythhing else until I let it out
> 
> hugs



I finally got to writing something in a short bit of free time I had on a very busy morning. Sad thing is it's quite possibly the most depressing poem I've written... ever.


----------



## spiritangel

rellis10 said:


> I finally got to writing something in a short bit of free time I had on a very busy morning. Sad thing is it's quite possibly the most depressing poem I've written... ever.



Hugs, hey where would the world be without depressing poems? Look at Edger Allen Poe after all

lots of hugs


----------



## CastingPearls

rellis10 said:


> I finally got to writing something in a short bit of free time I had on a very busy morning. Sad thing is it's quite possibly the most depressing poem I've written... ever.


It's part of my own personal therapy. If it helps at all don't knock what works. Sometimes putting it down on paper or in type helps you look at things from a different perspective. 

Oh and Rick, hugs and more hugs.


----------



## VeronicaVaughn

I have a headache, my wisdom teeth are aching, I feel like I'm getting a fever and I can't drink enough water to feel hydrated enough. I had so many plans today and I just feel awful that I'm not well enough to do any of them.


----------



## Micara

I've had to make some tough decisions and I am under a lot of stress. I am just not in a good place right now.


----------



## spiritangel

Micara said:


> I've had to make some tough decisions and I am under a lot of stress. I am just not in a good place right now.



lots and lots of squishy hugs and a hope that the stress is eased for you soon


----------



## Surlysomething

Continual disappointment from people I care about very much.


----------



## AuntHen

Micara said:


> I've had to make some tough decisions and I am under a lot of stress. I am just not in a good place right now.





Surlysomething said:


> Continual disappointment from people I care about very much.



hugs ladies!


----------



## Sweetie

I'm sad because I need a dr. to sign a paper that states that I'm disabled so I can be exempt from community service, and not one will do it. It's cover their ass time for all of them. And I'm sad that the one dr. yelled at me because the other prescribed a medicine that shouldn't be taken with one I'm on already. I'm sad because we've all been taken apart into parts like cars instead of being treated as human beings. Most of all I'm sad because I feel too rotten to do the community service. I would love to have the physical stamina to do it. I'm sad because I sometimes feel useless. Situations like this make it all too clear to me how much I CANNOT DO AND HOW MUCH I WISH I COULD DO.


----------



## moore2me

Jeeshcristina said:


> My daddy, a Vietnam vet with three purple hearts who can always fix anything and is my hero, who is tougher than nails, and the one person I can count on no matter what happens in this world, is sick. Really really sick. In over three years of living away from home, he's visited my apartment twice. He feels so bad that he's actually spending the night with me so I can keep an eye on him. It's heartbreaking to hear him say he can't sleep because he's afraid he isn't going to wake up.  I just wish I could fix him.



Dear Christina, 

I am sorry to hear about your brave father's illness. He fought for this country in a horrible war (my hubby is also a Vietnam era Vet) and I thank your dad for serving in that awful war. Three purple hearts is an amazing thing. I have never heard of a real person getting that many! I will be praying for him and you during this illness and hope that God and his angels once again will hold him close and your dad will not suffer and find peace. *Tell your dad that in my book, he will always be a great hero who fought for our country.

*I have known other Vietnam Vets who were exposed to some bad stuff over in the jungles, etc, and have developed cancers that may be related to their exposures. Chemicals like Agent Orange, DDT, phosphorous, and a host of others were used without much regard to our men's safety. The VA has some programs to assist these men, but unfortunately the programs are too few and often too late.




Sweetie said:


> I'm sad because I need a dr. to sign a paper that states that I'm disabled so I can be exempt from community service, and not one will do it. It's cover their ass time for all of them. And I'm sad that the one dr. yelled at me because the other prescribed a medicine that shouldn't be taken with one I'm on already. I'm sad because we've all been taken apart into parts like cars instead of being treated as human beings. Most of all I'm sad because I feel too rotten to do the community service. I would love to have the physical stamina to do it. I'm sad because I sometimes feel useless. Situations like this make it all too clear to me how much I CANNOT DO AND HOW MUCH I WISH I COULD DO.




Sweetie,

You mentioned that you wished you could serve your obligations of community service. I am have a 100% disability now, but 20 yrs. ago I did not. At that time, I was called to jury duty and did serve. Here are some things I had to do. *Our courtroom was in an old historic building - no elevator. The courtroom was a walkup of three stories. *The woman's bathroom was on the second floor (very limited handicapped facility). You had to sit in the chairs provided the jury. The breaks were one in midmorning and one in the afternoon.

It was summer and hot outside. The historic building used window unit air conditioners (ugh) and ceiling fans. I was miserable. Between the heat, the walk up and down, the lack of breaks, the confinement in the chair (I need my legs elevated) - it was pretty rough. Now it would be impossible. *And to put it more plainly, the defendant would not get a fair trial if I was on the jury because I would be too miserable and uncomfortable to listen and make an informed judgment.* So, excusing me from that type of community service now would be a smart thing to do. I would not want someone like me on my jury.

However, there are many other ways you can provide community service. There are children in the hospital who need a friend. Some hospitals even have babies that need to be rocked. Check with hospital auxiliary service for who and how. There are people in hospitals that need someone to visit them and be a friend. I am talking about long term rehab patients who are away from home. Again, check with hospital volunteer services. Can you knit? Some groups knit hats for newborn babies. Can you sew? Some groups make blankets for service men and women. Some people teach reading to adults. There is a host of community service things you can do depending on what your strengths are now. Just look for the niche you can fill.


----------



## Sweetie

moore2me said:


> Sweetie,
> 
> You mentioned that you wished you could serve your obligations of community service. I am have a 100% disability now, but 20 yrs. ago I did not. At that time, I was called to jury duty and did serve. Here are some things I had to do. *Our courtroom was in an old historic building - no elevator. The courtroom was a walkup of three stories. *The woman's bathroom was on the second floor (very limited handicapped facility). You had to sit in the chairs provided the jury. The breaks were one in midmorning and one in the afternoon.
> 
> It was summer and hot outside. The historic building used window unit air conditioners (ugh) and ceiling fans. I was miserable. Between the heat, the walk up and down, the lack of breaks, the confinement in the chair (I need my legs elevated) - it was pretty rough. Now it would be impossible. *And to put it more plainly, the defendant would not get a fair trial if I was on the jury because I would be too miserable and uncomfortable to listen and make an informed judgment.* So, excusing me from that type of community service now would be a smart thing to do. I would not want someone like me on my jury.
> 
> However, there are many other ways you can provide community service. There are children in the hospital who need a friend. Some hospitals even have babies that need to be rocked. Check with hospital auxiliary service for who and how. There are people in hospitals that need someone to visit them and be a friend. I am talking about long term rehab patients who are away from home. Again, check with hospital volunteer services. Can you knit? Some groups knit hats for newborn babies. Can you sew? Some groups make blankets for service men and women. Some people teach reading to adults. There is a host of community service things you can do depending on what your strengths are now. Just look for the niche you can fill.



Thank you so much for the suggestions. Unfortunately, in the area I live it would require a long trek on public transportation to do several of the ideas you've mentioned. I'm hoping that something closer to where I live will open up. Right now, the only community service that seems to be needed is cleaning public parks, beaches, and things of a physical nature. I'm hoping that once my new primary care physician gets ALL of my medical records from ALL of the different drs. he will feel more comfortable signing the papers I need.


----------



## Mishty

I'm not proud of my actions,but I'm not ashamed either, that makes me sad. Not having remorse or thinking about the other person involved.


----------



## HottiMegan

I fell in the grocery store a couple years ago and every once in a while my hip pain flares up since that fall. I am having a flare up and it hurts like hell. I regret not seeing a doctor after that fall. Lack of insurance and money caused not going. Now i experience severe pain every few months for a few days at a time. Pain makes me sad because it makes me miss out on my life and being a good mom to my boys.


----------



## Jeeshcristina

moore2me said:


> Dear Christina,
> 
> I am sorry to hear about your brave father's illness. He fought for this country in a horrible war (my hubby is also a Vietnam era Vet) and I thank your dad for serving in that awful war. Three purple hearts is an amazing thing. I have never heard of a real person getting that many! I will be praying for him and you during this illness and hope that God and his angels once again will hold him close and your dad will not suffer and find peace. *Tell your dad that in my book, he will always be a great hero who fought for our country.
> 
> *I have known other Vietnam Vets who were exposed to some bad stuff over in the jungles, etc, and have developed cancers that may be related to their exposures. Chemicals like Agent Orange, DDT, phosphorous, and a host of others were used without much regard to our men's safety. The VA has some programs to assist these men, but unfortunately the programs are too few and often too late.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Sweetie,
> 
> You mentioned that you wished you could serve your obligations of community service. I am have a 100% disability now, but 20 yrs. ago I did not. At that time, I was called to jury duty and did serve. Here are some things I had to do. *Our courtroom was in an old historic building - no elevator. The courtroom was a walkup of three stories. *The woman's bathroom was on the second floor (very limited handicapped facility). You had to sit in the chairs provided the jury. The breaks were one in midmorning and one in the afternoon.
> 
> It was summer and hot outside. The historic building used window unit air conditioners (ugh) and ceiling fans. I was miserable. Between the heat, the walk up and down, the lack of breaks, the confinement in the chair (I need my legs elevated) - it was pretty rough. Now it would be impossible. *And to put it more plainly, the defendant would not get a fair trial if I was on the jury because I would be too miserable and uncomfortable to listen and make an informed judgment.* So, excusing me from that type of community service now would be a smart thing to do. I would not want someone like me on my jury.
> 
> However, there are many other ways you can provide community service. There are children in the hospital who need a friend. Some hospitals even have babies that need to be rocked. Check with hospital auxiliary service for who and how. There are people in hospitals that need someone to visit them and be a friend. I am talking about long term rehab patients who are away from home. Again, check with hospital volunteer services. Can you knit? Some groups knit hats for newborn babies. Can you sew? Some groups make blankets for service men and women. Some people teach reading to adults. There is a host of community service things you can do depending on what your strengths are now. Just look for the niche you can fill.




Thank you so much for your kind words. He's doing a bit better now, but we're not out of the woods by any means. I know that we all have our time, but my mother died when I was 13, so I'm not ready to give up my daddy just yet. He's pretty tough, so hopefully he can hang in there for a while longer. 

It really made my day to read your post. Thank you again.


----------



## CAMellie

For some reason that I can NOT figure out (believe me I racked my brain for hours) I was horribly cruel to my husband last night. I said some things to him that I would never even say to my worst enemy. The worst part is I can't even remember 3/4 of what I said to him.
I have apologized profusely to him, and he has forgiven me, but I'm still so very sad that I was so cruel to the most important person in my life.


----------



## BBWbonnie

Nothing at the moment


----------



## Luv2BNaughty

Staind and Godsmack are going to be in Nashville the day after my birthday. Only a 3 hour drive - I can manage that. I've been wanting to see Staind for years now, but I don't want to go by myself. Crossing my fingers that I can find someone to go with me in time! =/


----------



## BBWbonnie

That I now have the flu and feel soooooooooooooooo crap


----------



## Lovelyone

SEPARATISM in the forums. Frustrating to say the least.


----------



## Diana_Prince245

I think one of my home health clients is going to have to be placed in a facility. She has Alzheimer's, and she's beginning to enter the violent phase of the disease. Her husband, who is legitimately one of the best men I've ever met, spent most of my shift yesterday in the kitchen with me crying. He lost his first wife to breast cancer, and now he's fairly close to having his second taken away.


----------



## TwilightStarr

I don't know if it is because I have been sick this past week or because my dad is staying with us again but I am having panic/anxiety at night again like I used to a long time ago  I thought I got rid of this problem for good but here it is again, I just hope it doesn't stay around as long as it did last time


----------



## CAMellie

I'm thisclose to freaking out right now. Our roommate (who is the main person on the rental agreement with me being just an add-on) had to be moved into a nursing home for health reasons so her family is submitting a 30 day notice. Adrian only recently got a new job and we don't have a nest egg built back up yet. Short of moving into some cheap motel...we have nowhere to go in only 30 days.


----------



## Surlysomething

I just miss him.


----------



## HottiMegan

We were neck and neck and lost out on the house. This sucks ass. I am about ready to just give up on the whole home ownership thing. I need a cake or cookie pick me up..


----------



## Mitchapalooza

im going through the same crap everyone says "buy a house!" im not sure its worth it LOL if you were here I would invite you guy s to the american legion v day dance lol hope your day gets better! dont stress about it !


----------



## CastingPearls

Tiger (my dad's cat) is not responding to his insulin. The vet is suggesting tweaking different dosages but he is losing weight fast. I love this cat and he has grown close to me and been a comfort since he is Nacho's twin and I wasn't able to bring Nacho with me when I left in August and miss him a lot. 

To make matters worse, my grandmother keeps walking in and demanding my dad have him euthanized or stop the injections and let him die because she insists it's a waste of money to give a cat insulin. I have to fight for this cat's life every day. My grandmother herself is diabetic as is my dad and I can't believe that they have these conversations and it takes everything in me to not say, 'Why don't we stop giving you insulin and let you die too?'


----------



## CAMellie

CAMellie said:


> I'm thisclose to freaking out right now. Our roommate (who is the main person on the rental agreement with me being just an add-on) had to be moved into a nursing home for health reasons so her family is submitting a 30 day notice. Adrian only recently got a new job and we don't have a nest egg built back up yet. Short of moving into some cheap motel...we have nowhere to go in only 30 days.



**Update**

We get to keep the apartment ourselves and will soon be looking for a roommate. Big relief


----------



## littlefairywren

CastingPearls said:


> Tiger (my dad's cat) is not responding to his insulin. The vet is suggesting tweaking different dosages but he is losing weight fast. I love this cat and he has grown close to me and been a comfort since he is Nacho's twin and I wasn't able to bring Nacho with me when I left in August and miss him a lot.
> 
> To make matters worse, my grandmother keeps walking in and demanding my dad have him euthanized or stop the injections and let him die because she insists it's a waste of money to give a cat insulin. I have to fight for this cat's life every day. My grandmother herself is diabetic as is my dad and I can't believe that they have these conversations and it takes everything in me to not say, 'Why don't we stop giving you insulin and let you die too?'



Poor wee Tiger. I'm glad he has you to look after him and be his protector, Lainey.


----------



## thatgirl08

Getting the cold shoulder from someone I love, not because I did something wrong but because they're taking out their frustration with someone else on me. Hoping it passes quickly.


----------



## Gingembre

I am sad because he doesnt want me anymore.

I am sad because, however much I try to dislike him, I end up disliking myself for feeling like I wasn't good enough....I am sad because I wasn't good enough.


----------



## CastingPearls

Gingembre said:


> I am sad because he doesnt want me anymore.
> 
> I am sad because, however much I try to dislike him, I end up disliking myself for feeling like I wasn't good enough....I am sad because I wasn't good enough.


I know it hurts, Laura. But please believe me, you are more than good enough. You're beautiful and smart and funny and sexy as hell. You're an amazing person and I don't even know you. One day when the pain lessens, and I promise you, it will, I promise....you will see that it was truly his loss and your gain because it gave you an opportunity to be found by someone who *will* appreciate the beauty of you. HUGS.

PS--also don't be so hard on yourself--it's okay to be really sad right now.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

My best friend is making harsh statements to me about my choice to be here at my moms helping them out, and I feel like nobody will ever understand why I do the things I do for my grandmother..


----------



## moore2me

CastingPearls said:


> Tiger (my dad's cat) is not responding to his insulin. The vet is suggesting tweaking different dosages but he is losing weight fast. I love this cat and he has grown close to me and been a comfort since he is Nacho's twin and I wasn't able to bring Nacho with me when I left in August and miss him a lot.
> 
> To make matters worse, my grandmother keeps walking in and demanding my dad have him euthanized or stop the injections and let him die because she insists it's a waste of money to give a cat insulin. I have to fight for this cat's life every day. My grandmother herself is diabetic as is my dad and I can't believe that they have these conversations and it takes everything in me to not say, 'Why don't we stop giving you insulin and let you die too?'



Your granny is much like my grandpa in their thoughts about cats. Back when they were growing up, cats were domestic animals that had jobs - to keep the farm, barn, or house free from rodents and other pests. For their work, we gave them shelter and food if the mice weren't enough pay. Most of the time, the cats were free range.

What your granny needs is a good reason for the cat to keep living. *Why not make up a convincing story that the cat has been enrolled in a clinical trial on a revised human, juvenille diabetic drug that is going thru a first phase of safety testing on cats?* If you need, I have some papers describing such testing that would fool almost anyone. I can email them to you. Now the cat will have a job - "saving the lives of juvenille diabetics".

Tell her you called the vet and told him/her that you were going to have to stop the insulin shots and have the cat put to sleep. *The vet suggested you enroll the cat in these clinical trials as a way of helping kids and at the same time MAYBE helping the cat. The risk with clinical trials are three fold *- one you do not know if the drug will work, two you do not know whether of not the drug has toxic side effects, and risk three - part of the test group does not get the real drug. Part of the test group gets a placebo - so your kitty may not get the drug at all in a real clinical trial.

Most clinical trials are done by research teams (so make one up) probably a big company is best - Pfizer Drugs is good. Better would be the company is located in Switzerland (hard to call them). Tell her you are working with a team of vets who are working out of a mobile office (like a Red Cross blood mobile) and they move around a five state area. They visit your town once a month . . . .If you need, I can also make up a business card for them.

You can even have a special name tag made for your kitty that says she is a research animal . . .etc.


----------



## CastingPearls

M2M, I really appreciate(and am touched) how much thought you put into this but my grandmother is an immigrant with a third grade education whose own children taught her how to read basic English when they came to the US. The point is, although I love her very much, and she managed to survive child abuse and abandonment, surviving nazi occupation and being a displaced worker and almost dying on the boat over here, her intellectual capacity, especially at her very advanced age (signs of dementia are evident), is, I'm sorry to say, extremely limited. She is incapable of comprehending anything you've suggested. Words like 'enrolled', 'clinical trial', and the fact that there is even more than one type of diabetes is beyond her reach. She only understands black vs white and even then I have to shout because she's also nearly stone deaf. These and too many others are only some of the reasons why interacting with her with this situation is impossible.

And now Tiger has lost more weight and is lethargic and we may have to euthanize him anyway which is breaking my heart.


----------



## nugget34

I grew up in a first world country had a reasonable level of education and i agree with grandmother

Whilst your love and affection for your cat and wanting to save her is an admirable trait going along that path is only your opinion and doesnt make it the right choice or make your grandma wrong as judged by your attitude.

Another school of thought or my opinion which i dont claim as being the right one is for 20 bucks one could buy another kitten from a animal welfare place which over time will provide the same level of affection considering its just a cat which isnt much, shovels are cheaper than vets fees too.


----------



## penguin

nugget34 said:


> Another school of thought or my opinion which i dont claim as being the right one is for 20 bucks one could buy another kitten from a animal welfare place which over time will provide the same level of affection considering its just a cat which isnt much, shovels are cheaper than vets fees too.



That is utterly heartless.


----------



## moore2me

Casting Pearls,

However, you have to admit it was a good story tho. Actually, I studied this stuff in school so it didn't take much time to make up - I just did it from memory. I also have visited a couple of veterinary universities and regular hospitals that run such clinical trials. We also have a large federal facility in Arkansas called NCTR (National Center for Toxicological Research) and I have friends that work(ed) there. 

These guys actually do research on diabetes and last time I talked to them, kept a herd of beagles with diabetes specifically to run trials on for diabetic medications - so the cat story was not a far stretch.

I am sorry to hear of your cat's geriatric diabetes. If she is like many other older critters (including humans) with type II diabetes, she may not feel good most days. And unfortunately, since she is just a cat (my dog tells me cat's are not very smart), she does not know what is going on - she just wants it to stop. Plus, if she is like dogs, she may try to run away if she thinks she is dying. I have lost several dogs by natural death and they are away found away from the house like they are going somewhere.

But, I know you love kitty and I know she is part of your lifeline right now. You might have to adopt a kitty from the shelter to help fill the space her paws are taking in your heart if you lose her to death right now. Bless you and bless kitty. St. Francis of Assisi, the patron saint of animals will see that kitty is rewarded for her valiant service when her time comes.


----------



## thatgirl08

nugget34 said:


> I grew up in a first world country had a reasonable level of education and i agree with grandmother
> 
> Whilst your love and affection for your cat and wanting to save her is an admirable trait going along that path is only your opinion and doesnt make it the right choice or make your grandma wrong as judged by your attitude.
> 
> Another school of thought or my opinion which i dont claim as being the right one is for 20 bucks one could buy another kitten from a animal welfare place which over time will provide the same level of affection considering its just a cat which isnt much, shovels are cheaper than vets fees too.



Dude what the fuck? It doesn't matter what you think about it honestly. Like who do you think you are to be giving out opinions like that?


----------



## Mathias

nugget34 said:


> I grew up in a first world country had a reasonable level of education and i agree with grandmother
> 
> Whilst your love and affection for your cat and wanting to save her is an admirable trait going along that path is only your opinion and doesnt make it the right choice or make your grandma wrong as judged by your attitude.
> 
> Another school of thought or my opinion which i dont claim as being the right one is for 20 bucks one could buy another kitten from a animal welfare place which over time will provide the same level of affection considering its just a cat which isnt much, shovels are cheaper than vets fees too.



Even though that's your opinion, that doesn't make it right either. She has a love for her pet and doesn't treat them as merely disposable. You're despicable.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

That's one thing about message boards... anyone and everyone is free to opine, regardless of what that opinion happens to be. 

I am personally glad when heartless people out themselves publicly - that's one less person I have to spend time getting to know or being polite to here.

Most people can conceive a child for free, which is even less than the $20 (actually, the going rate here is $75) you'll pay to adopt from a shelter. So, that means kids are replaceable, right? Of course not. Everyone knows that's absolutely ludicrous. 

Pets are family members to people who love them. The idea of putting them down because it's financially easier is unimaginable.


----------



## nugget34

BigBeautifulMe said:


> That's one thing about message boards... anyone and everyone is free to opine, regardless of what that opinion happens to be.
> 
> I am personally glad when heartless people out themselves publicly - that's one less person I have to spend time getting to know or being polite to here.
> 
> Most people can conceive a child for free, which is even less than the $20 (actually, the going rate here is $75) you'll pay to adopt from a shelter. So, that means kids are replaceable, right? Of course not. Everyone knows that's absolutely ludicrous.
> 
> Pets are family members to people who love them. The idea of putting them down because it's financially easier is unimaginable.



Without knowing you and the level of education you attained going by your response one would have to assume you obtained the same level of education as the grandmother or simply your not too bright.

Pets are put down every day of the week for financial reasons and comparing children to cats well it sums it all up really


----------



## Mathias

nugget34 said:


> Without knowing you and the level of education you attained going by your response one would have to assume you obtained the same level of education as the grandmother or simply your not too bright.
> 
> Pets are put down every day of the week for financial reasons and comparing children to cats well it sums it all up really



I'm guessing you aren't very well versed in compassion based on your responses.


----------



## Surlysomething

nugget34 said:


> Without knowing you and the level of education you attained going by your response one would have to assume you obtained the same level of education as the grandmother or simply your not too bright.
> 
> Pets are put down every day of the week for financial reasons and comparing children to cats well it sums it all up really





"your not too bright"

it's you're, by the way


----------



## Donna

nugget34 said:


> Without knowing you and the level of education you attained going by your response one would have to assume you obtained the same level of education as the grandmother or simply your not too bright.
> 
> Pets are put down every day of the week for financial reasons and comparing children to cats well it sums it all up really



I would be careful not to substitute "your" for "you're" next time you attempt to insult someone by making incorrect assumptions regarding their education level. Proper sentence structure and grammar might also reduce some of the irony involved.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

nugget34 said:


> Without knowing you and the level of education you attained going by your response one would have to assume you obtained the same level of education as the grandmother or simply your not too bright.
> 
> Pets are put down every day of the week for financial reasons and comparing children to cats well it sums it all up really


I have a Bachelor's Degree from one of the top 20 colleges in the United States. More importantly, I have a heart and understand compassion for animals. Level of education has nothing to do with how much compassion one possesses, and clearly you have none.


----------



## cinnamitch

nugget34 said:


> Blah, blah, blah, blah blah.



Dude, did a kitty scratch you when you were little? Did a girlfriend choose a cat over you? Was your family eaten by wild kittens?


----------



## cinnamitch

BigBeautifulMe said:


> I have a Bachelor's Degree from one of the top 20 colleges in the United States. More importantly, I have a heart and understand compassion for animals. Level of education has nothing to do with how much compassion one possesses, and clearly you have none.



I say we coat him with cat food and lock him in a room filled with hungry cats;


----------



## Miss Vickie

nugget34 said:


> I grew up in a first world country had a reasonable level of education and i agree with grandmother
> 
> Whilst your love and affection for your cat and wanting to save her is an admirable trait going along that path is only your opinion and doesnt make it the right choice or make your grandma wrong as judged by your attitude.
> 
> Another school of thought or my opinion which i dont claim as being the right one is for 20 bucks one could buy another kitten from a animal welfare place which over time will provide the same level of affection considering its just a cat which isnt much, shovels are cheaper than vets fees too.



Seriously??? That's your response? Wow. You know, when it comes to loving an animal, it's really not about the money, although obviously we all have limits as to what we can afford. If she can afford the vet fees, why *not* pay to treat a treatable disease? Where is the harm? Yes, she disagrees with her grandmother, and that's okay. I don't recall her saying her grandmother was wrong, just that her pushing to put the animal down upset her.

This whole discussion is disturbing to me, so I guess that's what is making me sad right now, as opposed to the reason I came here to post.


----------



## Diana_Prince245

cinnamitch said:


> I say we coat him with cat food and lock him in a room filled with hungry cats;



My cats are hungry and they have minions who roam around outside, and are even hungrier.


----------



## imfree

The Princess has a dim view of cat haters. 

View attachment Alleigh Kaht queenrework by surley.jpg


----------



## littlefairywren

nugget34 said:


> I grew up in a first world country had a reasonable level of education and i agree with grandmother
> 
> Whilst your love and affection for your cat and wanting to save her is an admirable trait going along that path is only your opinion and doesnt make it the right choice or make your grandma wrong as judged by your attitude.
> 
> Another school of thought or my opinion which i dont claim as being the right one is for 20 bucks one could buy another kitten from a animal welfare place which over time will provide the same level of affection considering its just a cat which isnt much, shovels are cheaper than vets fees too.



What the hell!? You're damn right about one thing, you're opinion is not right. Way to make Aussies look like morons. Have some compassion for God's sake!


----------



## Your Plump Princess

*I'm sad I can't bring myself to post anything actually helpful to Casting Pearls except that I am keeping her in my thoughts. *

Thanks to a dims member, _who may have been raised in a first world country_, but has the heart of a _first class sociopath. _


----------



## spiritangel

CastingPearls said:


> Tiger (my dad's cat) is not responding to his insulin. The vet is suggesting tweaking different dosages but he is losing weight fast. I love this cat and he has grown close to me and been a comfort since he is Nacho's twin and I wasn't able to bring Nacho with me when I left in August and miss him a lot.
> 
> To make matters worse, my grandmother keeps walking in and demanding my dad have him euthanized or stop the injections and let him die because she insists it's a waste of money to give a cat insulin. I have to fight for this cat's life every day. My grandmother herself is diabetic as is my dad and I can't believe that they have these conversations and it takes everything in me to not say, 'Why don't we stop giving you insulin and let you die too?'




Lainey I am so sorry you have to go through this. Whilst some people view an animal as just a pet so many of us know the truth that they become a treasured member of our family. Loosing a treasured family member is never easy. Watching anyone Animal or Human wasting away is just heartbreaking.

Lots of squishy hugs


I am sad because I have been feeling ick and off balance for the last few days and constantly feel exhausted. Wish new mobile battery would hurry and get here so I can make a drs appointment


----------



## rellis10

CastingPearls said:


> Tiger (my dad's cat) is not responding to his insulin. The vet is suggesting tweaking different dosages but he is losing weight fast. I love this cat and he has grown close to me and been a comfort since he is Nacho's twin and I wasn't able to bring Nacho with me when I left in August and miss him a lot.
> 
> To make matters worse, my grandmother keeps walking in and demanding my dad have him euthanized or stop the injections and let him die because she insists it's a waste of money to give a cat insulin. I have to fight for this cat's life every day. My grandmother herself is diabetic as is my dad and I can't believe that they have these conversations and it takes everything in me to not say, 'Why don't we stop giving you insulin and let you die too?'



I'm sorry to hear this but I know what you mean. So long as there's a hope you can't give up.

Our cat (Cider) passed a few years ago now. She had kidney disease and we did all we could but unfortunately there was nothing that could be done. But that's the point, nothing could be done whereas hopefully there are options for your cat. Expense or hardship don't matter when the subject (human or animal) is loved... apparently some people find that hard to understand.


----------



## Fat Brian

nugget34 said:


> Without knowing you and the level of education you attained going by your response one would have to assume you obtained the same level of education as the grandmother or simply your not too bright.
> 
> Pets are put down every day of the week for financial reasons and comparing children to cats well it sums it all up really


----------



## imfree

imfree said:


> The Princess has a dim view of cat haters.



Princess Alleigh's photo was reworked by Surlysomething.


----------



## Surlysomething

imfree said:


> Princess Alleigh's photo was reworked by Surlysomething.




Haha. She looks so regal!


----------



## imfree

Surlysomething said:


> Haha. She looks so regal!



Thanks, again, Surly. I had to give credit where it was due. You did great work!:happy:


----------



## CastingPearls

"We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." ~Immanuel Kant 


Everyone, thank you for your kind words. In the interest of moving along, I'd just like to say that Tiger will be taken care of as long as he isn't in pain or starving and if he has to be euthanized, it will be done while in the arms of his loving family. Money is not an issue when it comes to family, as long as there's a chance. Insulin, for the record is very inexpensive. Destroying an animal with the reasoning that it can be easily replaced is repugnant to me. My grandmother has abused her own pets which had to be removed from her and her demands were unsolicited and are unwelcome. She is thankfully, not a decision-maker in this household.

If I've ever been guilty of making someone feel worse, rather than try to encourage them, after they've posted in this thread for any reason, I sincerely apologize. Grief is a valid feeling and everyone should be able to be free to express it here, no matter how petty others might judge it to be.


----------



## moore2me

CastingPearls said:


> "We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." ~Immanuel Kant
> 
> 
> Everyone, thank you for your kind words. . . . (snipped)
> *
> If I've ever been guilty of making someone feel worse, rather than try to encourage them, after they've posted in this thread for any reason, I sincerely apologize. Grief is a valid feeling and everyone should be able to be free to express it here, no matter how petty others might judge it to be. *



Lainey,

You - my dear, have a heart of gold. Any creature be it your kitty, your grandmama, or your poppa who is lucky enough to be granted shelter under your wings is very, very lucky indeed.


----------



## Miss Vickie

CastingPearls said:


> "We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." ~Immanuel Kant
> 
> 
> Everyone, thank you for your kind words. In the interest of moving along, I'd just like to say that Tiger will be taken care of as long as he isn't in pain or starving and if he has to be euthanized, it will be done while in the arms of his loving family. Money is not an issue when it comes to family, as long as there's a chance. Insulin, for the record is very inexpensive. Destroying an animal with the reasoning that it can be easily replaced is repugnant to me. My grandmother has abused her own pets which had to be removed from her and her demands were unsolicited and are unwelcome. She is thankfully, not a decision-maker in this household.
> 
> If I've ever been guilty of making someone feel worse, rather than try to encourage them, after they've posted in this thread for any reason, I sincerely apologize. Grief is a valid feeling and everyone should be able to be free to express it here, no matter how petty others might judge it to be.



Your kitty is lucky to have you, being so willing to do what you can to give her a comfortable and hopefully longer life. I know it's heartbreaking watching them go through extended illness -- I had a bunny that was paralyzed in her back legs that I cared for over a year until she died -- but when you love them and they're having a good quality of life, we do our best. I hope she starts to respond to treatment and has many years of love and head scrunches ahead.


----------



## Miss Vickie

My sadness is finding -- way after the fact -- that something really important happened in my life, and was kept from me, something that makes me question pretty much everything about the last eight years of my life. And, because the events that are giving me pause happened nearly eight years ago, I'm a little at a loss as to how to resolve them and move on. Everyone else has dealt, moved on, put it behind them, etc etc etc. But for me it's very much real and immediate and happening now.

I want drama and confrontation and long, torturous conversation. I want resolution and understanding for ME. And I ain't getting it. Not that people aren't trying, but it's just not the same.

So... yeah. I'm sad and frustrated and a little at a loss as to how to move on from here.


----------



## Gingembre

CastingPearls said:


> I know it hurts, Laura. But please believe me, you are more than good enough. You're beautiful and smart and funny and sexy as hell. You're an amazing person and I don't even know you. One day when the pain lessens, and I promise you, it will, I promise....you will see that it was truly his loss and your gain because it gave you an opportunity to be found by someone who *will* appreciate the beauty of you. HUGS.
> 
> PS--also don't be so hard on yourself--it's okay to be really sad right now.



I only just saw this. Thank you so much, Lainey...your very kind words mean a lot.  Without wanting to bring up cat-gate again...I hope Tiger and you are both doing ok. ((hugs))


----------



## Gingembre

Miss Vickie said:


> My sadness is finding -- way after the fact -- that something really important happened in my life, and was kept from me, something that makes me question pretty much everything about the last eight years of my life. And, because the events that are giving me pause happened nearly eight years ago, I'm a little at a loss as to how to resolve them and move on. Everyone else has dealt, moved on, put it behind them, etc etc etc. But for me it's very much real and immediate and happening now.
> 
> I want drama and confrontation and long, torturous conversation. I want resolution and understanding for ME. And I ain't getting it. Not that people aren't trying, but it's just not the same.
> 
> So... yeah. I'm sad and frustrated and a little at a loss as to how to move on from here.



Ouch, that bites. ((hugs))


----------



## Surlysomething

Miss Vickie said:


> My sadness is finding -- way after the fact -- that something really important happened in my life, and was kept from me, something that makes me question pretty much everything about the last eight years of my life. And, because the events that are giving me pause happened nearly eight years ago, I'm a little at a loss as to how to resolve them and move on. Everyone else has dealt, moved on, put it behind them, etc etc etc. But for me it's very much real and immediate and happening now.
> 
> I want drama and confrontation and long, torturous conversation. I want resolution and understanding for ME. And I ain't getting it. Not that people aren't trying, but it's just not the same.
> 
> So... yeah. I'm sad and frustrated and a little at a loss as to how to move on from here.


 
I'm so sorry to hear that, Miss V. I can only imagine how frustrated and sad you are. 

Feel better, ok?


----------



## CastingPearls

Miss Vickie said:


> My sadness is finding -- way after the fact -- that something really important happened in my life, and was kept from me, something that makes me question pretty much everything about the last eight years of my life. And, because the events that are giving me pause happened nearly eight years ago, I'm a little at a loss as to how to resolve them and move on. Everyone else has dealt, moved on, put it behind them, etc etc etc. But for me it's very much real and immediate and happening now.
> 
> I want drama and confrontation and long, torturous conversation. I want resolution and understanding for ME. And I ain't getting it. Not that people aren't trying, but it's just not the same.
> 
> So... yeah. I'm sad and frustrated and a little at a loss as to how to move on from here.


I'm so sorry you're in this position. Sometimes there's nothing worse than not having answers, resolution, closure, etc. Something I've become very familiar with lately and yes, I'm the same way, talk it out, confront, etc. and it's frustrating as hell for someone who needs it.
I hope that you do get all your answers and if you don't, that at some people you can attain some peace about it, although that may be a tall order.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Miss Vickie said:


> My sadness is finding -- way after the fact -- that something really important happened in my life, and was kept from me, something that makes me question pretty much everything about the last eight years of my life. And, because the events that are giving me pause happened nearly eight years ago, I'm a little at a loss as to how to resolve them and move on. Everyone else has dealt, moved on, put it behind them, etc etc etc. But for me it's very much real and immediate and happening now.
> 
> I want drama and confrontation and long, torturous conversation. I want resolution and understanding for ME. And I ain't getting it. Not that people aren't trying, but it's just not the same.
> 
> So... yeah. I'm sad and frustrated and a little at a loss as to how to move on from here.



I am so sorry you're dealing with this. When loved ones keep something like this from you, you end up not only dealing with the emotions that result from it alone (because everyone else has already gone through it), but you ALSO have to deal with the emotions that come from the betrayal. 

My grandfather raised me -- he was a father to me. When I was studying abroad in Europe, he passed away. My family LIED to me for MONTHS about it because my grandmother (a nutjob and a narcissist in many, many ways) told them they had to because she "didn't want to risk" me coming home and not going back to Spain and missing out on the opportunity. That wouldn't have happened, AND I was well into my twenties (27) when it happened and should have been allowed to make that decision for myself. I still have not really gotten over or forgiven her for the betrayal, though I have long since dealt with my feelings of my grandfather's passing (well, as much as you can. I don't think we ever truly stop grieving the loss of the people we love).


----------



## Victoria08

What am I sad about today? I don't know...Valentine's day - for the first time ever - is making me kind of sad. Being alone on this day has never bothered me, I think partly because of my age. But I'm older now and I see everyone I know in beautiful relationships and I want what they have and that makes me sad because I don't have that. It's weird to want something so much even though I'm not completely confident that I'd be great at being in a relationship.


----------



## Inhibited

nugget34 said:


> some of you drama queens need to build a bridge and get over yourselfs



Are you sad due to the drama queens or for the poor cat?


----------



## penguin

nugget34 said:


> some of you drama queens need to build a bridge and get over yourselfs



So not only are you heartless, but tactless as well.


----------



## Shosh

nugget34 said:


> some of you drama queens need to build a bridge and get over yourselfs



From one Australian to another, wake up to yourself.


----------



## Miss Vickie

Gingembre said:


> Ouch, that bites. ((hugs))



Yeah, it does. Thanks. Hugs happily accepted.



Surlysomething said:


> I'm so sorry to hear that, Miss V. I can only imagine how frustrated and sad you are.
> 
> Feel better, ok?



Thanks, doll. Frustrated is a good word, because I feel like any response I have is too late and kind of pointless. Fortunately, being in school and working consumes vast amounts of my time and energy so I can't dwell too much, but when I do, I get mighty pissed.



CastingPearls said:


> I'm so sorry you're in this position. Sometimes there's nothing worse than not having answers, resolution, closure, etc. Something I've become very familiar with lately and yes, I'm the same way, talk it out, confront, etc. and it's frustrating as hell for someone who needs it.
> I hope that you do get all your answers and if you don't, that at some people you can attain some peace about it, although that may be a tall order.



Thanks, Lainey. It's been a tough time for me but I think I'll make it. I have awesome friends who have been really supportive, listening to my constant kvetching. 




BigBeautifulMe said:


> I am so sorry you're dealing with this. When loved ones keep something like this from you, you end up not only dealing with the emotions that result from it alone (because everyone else has already gone through it), but you ALSO have to deal with the emotions that come from the betrayal.
> 
> My grandfather raised me -- he was a father to me. When I was studying abroad in Europe, he passed away. My family LIED to me for MONTHS about it because my grandmother (a nutjob and a narcissist in many, many ways) told them they had to because she "didn't want to risk" me coming home and not going back to Spain and missing out on the opportunity. That wouldn't have happened, AND I was well into my twenties (27) when it happened and should have been allowed to make that decision for myself. I still have not really gotten over or forgiven her for the betrayal, though I have long since dealt with my feelings of my grandfather's passing (well, as much as you can. I don't think we ever truly stop grieving the loss of the people we love).



Oh wow. How awful! And yes, you're right, you should have been allowed to make that decision. This is sort of a hot button issue for me because my father died while I was away at camp and nobody came to get me so I could say goodbye, even though he was in the hospital for two days before he died. So being the last one to know about something me so deeply is something that is particularly upsetting. 

I'm sorry for the loss of your grandfather, and yes I agree -- we never truly stop grieving those big losses.


----------



## Inhibited

Inhibited said:


> Are you sad due to the drama queens or for the poor cat?



I just backtracked....I understand what this post was about now.. Thanks to the person who deleted the pic.. It was making me sad.


----------



## Jeeshcristina

Mixed signals. They suck. And I keep getting them.


----------



## Surlysomething

I miss hearing...


"hey baby...." 




Stupid Valentine's Day.


----------



## Luv2BNaughty

This day. On top of being alone for it, I lost my grandmother 10 years ago to the day.


----------



## Jeeshcristina

Surlysomething said:


> I miss hearing...
> 
> 
> "hey baby...."
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Stupid Valentine's Day.



Wanna be my Valentine? I think you're pretty awesome.


----------



## Surlysomething

Jeeshcristina said:


> Wanna be my Valentine? I think you're pretty awesome.




Awww, thanks. You're a sweetheart.


----------



## J34

Just got news that a young cousin of mine has died of brain cancer. It's quite a shame as he was only 8, and he wasn't able to enjoy much of his life as he was always in and out of the hospital. May he rest in peace now


----------



## willowmoon

A niece of mine who is 26 years old who is currently hospitalized is losing the fight right now. As a newborn she endured heart surgeries and has struggled with heart issues all throughout her life ... the doctors don't feel she will be lucky enough to pull through this one and feel it could be any day now. She's always beaten the odds when it came to her health before, but even she seems resigned to her fate. It's just so sad that this is happening to her when she's still so young.


----------



## CAMellie

J34 said:


> Just got news that a young cousin of mine has died of brain cancer. It's quite a shame as he was only 8, and he wasn't able to enjoy much of his life as he was always in and out of the hospital. May he rest in peace now



I'm so very sorry for your family's loss. 



willowmoon said:


> A niece of mine who is 26 years old who is currently hospitalized is losing the fight right now. As a newborn she endured heart surgeries and has struggled with heart issues all throughout her life ... the doctors don't feel she will be lucky enough to pull through this one and feel it could be any day now. She's always beaten the odds when it came to her health before, but even she seems resigned to her fate. It's just so sad that this is happening to her when she's still so young.



And I'm so very sorry that your niece has had such a struggle now and throughout her life. 


My sadness is...although I am NOT a cat person I'm gonna miss these butthead cats once my former roommates' kids come take them away. I know I've bitched about them in the past but they kinda grew on me and stuff.


----------



## CAMellie

My former roommates' daughter called me to tell me that it looks like her mom won't last another week.


----------



## HottiMegan

I'm sad and a little nervous for Max. He saw the doc almost a week ago for a sinus infection. He's been on meds since. Today he spiked a fever and was in tears about having ear pain. Luckily the doctor was in the office and we changed meds and got some ear drops with pain reliever. 
Doc mentioned it possibly being a staph infection and that's just scary. I hope it's not!


----------



## Lamia

willowmoon said:


> A niece of mine who is 26 years old who is currently hospitalized is losing the fight right now. As a newborn she endured heart surgeries and has struggled with heart issues all throughout her life ... the doctors don't feel she will be lucky enough to pull through this one and feel it could be any day now. She's always beaten the odds when it came to her health before, but even she seems resigned to her fate. It's just so sad that this is happening to her when she's still so young.



How horrible. I am sorry to hear of this.


----------



## Mishty

Nothing can make me feel better, not Suckerpunch,not My Idiot Brother,not pot,not bags of pretty candy coated Easter eggs,not emails with hope....not nothing can make me stop being sad over something I did. 

I'm sad because my heart is dull currently. 


boo hoo boooo fuckin' hoo


----------



## thatgirl08

The cat I got when I was seven years old has gotten really sick in the last few months. We finally brought her to the vet and it looks like she has either intestinal cancer or hypothyroidism or both. We're starting her on thyroid meds tomorrow but it's not looking good  I think we may have to put her down soon. I know she's lived a long happy life but it still kills me.. I've had her so long, it's hard to imagine life without her.


----------



## HottiMegan

Max was admitted to the hospital today. He's on IV antibiotics. They're talking that he might need surgery if he has a specific kind of infection. I will know more tomorrow but i am so sick of hospitals. The nurses forgot to give me bedding and I'm camping out on the vinyl couch thing with no blanket to keep my legs from sticking to it. Max looks so small and weak in his big hospital bed.


----------



## Surlysomething

HottiMegan said:


> Max was admitted to the hospital today. He's on IV antibiotics. They're talking that he might need surgery if he has a specific kind of infection. I will know more tomorrow but i am so sick of hospitals. The nurses forgot to give me bedding and I'm camping out on the vinyl couch thing with no blanket to keep my legs from sticking to it. Max looks so small and weak in his big hospital bed.


 

 So sorry to hear this, Megan. Sending lots of good thoughts and positive vibes your way.


----------



## Miss Vickie

HottiMegan said:


> Max was admitted to the hospital today. He's on IV antibiotics. They're talking that he might need surgery if he has a specific kind of infection. I will know more tomorrow but i am so sick of hospitals. The nurses forgot to give me bedding and I'm camping out on the vinyl couch thing with no blanket to keep my legs from sticking to it. Max looks so small and weak in his big hospital bed.



Oh honey. I'm so sorry. I hope he doesn't need surgery, poor little guy (and poor mama). And please, when nurses forget things, remind them -- they won't get mad, and if they do, too damn bad. Some nurses have terrible memories *raises hand* and feel terrible when we forget stuff. I'll leave a room with every intent to get bedding, juice, whatever and then will get interrupted, and then my interruption gets interrupted, then I'll get a phone call, and have to co-sign on a medication -- and pretty soon I've totally forgotten about what I left the room for.

Please ask for what you need. We want to help. 

Also, please update us here on Max and how he's doing. I'm hoping for the best. Take care, Mama.


----------



## Miss Vickie

Mishty said:


> Nothing can make me feel better, not Suckerpunch,not My Idiot Brother,not pot,not bags of pretty candy coated Easter eggs,not emails with hope....not nothing can make me stop being sad over something I did.
> 
> I'm sad because my heart is dull currently.
> 
> 
> boo hoo boooo fuckin' hoo



Aw, sorry Mishty. What does that mean, your heart is dull. I've never heard that expression before. I hope by now you're feeling better, though.



thatgirl08 said:


> The cat I got when I was seven years old has gotten really sick in the last few months. We finally brought her to the vet and it looks like she has either intestinal cancer or hypothyroidism or both. We're starting her on thyroid meds tomorrow but it's not looking good  I think we may have to put her down soon. I know she's lived a long happy life but it still kills me.. I've had her so long, it's hard to imagine life without her.



Oh no, how sad. We love those critters, don't they? I look at Lucy, my ol' lady Basset Hound, getting greyer and greyer and I know I'll be so sad when I lose her.

Enjoy your time with your kitty, and maybe she'll make it. Those meds can take awhile to work.



My sadness? Just with life right now. School is reaching fever pitch, my anxiety is through the roof and I'm having feelings I dare not share with the person who has hurt me. It sucks. I have to keep it inside, try to continue to work while feeling so sad and anxious, and it's definitely taking its toll.


----------



## Surlysomething

Mishty said:


> Nothing can make me feel better, not Suckerpunch,not My Idiot Brother,not pot,not bags of pretty candy coated Easter eggs,not emails with hope....not nothing can make me stop being sad over something I did.
> 
> I'm sad because my heart is dull currently.
> 
> 
> boo hoo boooo fuckin' hoo


 
<3 <3

A warm bath and a nap always helps.


----------



## Surlysomething

Miss Vickie said:


> My sadness? Just with life right now. School is reaching fever pitch, my anxiety is through the roof and I'm having feelings I dare not share with the person who has hurt me. It sucks. I have to keep it inside, try to continue to work while feeling so sad and anxious, and it's definitely taking its toll.


 

Be kind to yourself, ok?
Thinking of you.

*hug*


----------



## imfree

We had the sad news in an email, yesterday, from my cousin, Gisela, in West Germany. Tante (Aunt) Hannalore passed away, suddenly, on Feb, 20, 2012. My aunt would have been 81 in April. The love and nurture I received from Oma (Grandma) Belle and Tante (Aunt) Hannalore are very much a part of who I am today.


----------



## HottiMegan

Surlysomething said:


> So sorry to hear this, Megan. Sending lots of good thoughts and positive vibes your way.


Thanks. He's improving as long as he has his pain meds going.



Miss Vickie said:


> Oh honey. I'm so sorry. I hope he doesn't need surgery, poor little guy (and poor mama). And please, when nurses forget things, remind them -- they won't get mad, and if they do, too damn bad. Some nurses have terrible memories *raises hand* and feel terrible when we forget stuff. I'll leave a room with every intent to get bedding, juice, whatever and then will get interrupted, and then my interruption gets interrupted, then I'll get a phone call, and have to co-sign on a medication -- and pretty soon I've totally forgotten about what I left the room for.
> 
> Please ask for what you need. We want to help.
> 
> Also, please update us here on Max and how he's doing. I'm hoping for the best. Take care, Mama.



Thanks. I'm really bad at speaking up for my needs. I wasn't mad at anyone about it. I have always been one of those people who will be totally uncomfortable rather than inconvenience another person.

Max does not have mastoiditis (I think that's what they called it! it was big scary word) which would have required surgery and long term side effects, so we're lucky to that end. He's still dependent pain meds. He's on iv antibiotics until at least tomorrow. But the no-surgery news was good since he's already been through 18 of them. He's in good spirits as long as he's hogging my computer playing games, so that's fairly normal Max. His teacher came to see him and made him super special so that was a highlight for him


----------



## imfree

HottiMegan said:


> I'm sad and a little nervous for Max. He saw the doc almost a week ago for a sinus infection. He's been on meds since. Today he spiked a fever and was in tears about having ear pain. Luckily the doctor was in the office and we changed meds and got some ear drops with pain reliever.
> Doc mentioned it possibly being a staph infection and that's just scary. I hope it's not!



You and Max have been in my thoughts and prayers.


----------



## Lovelyone

Moving, the weather, life, everything is making me sad.


----------



## thatgirl08

Miss Vickie said:


> Oh no, how sad. We love those critters, don't they? I look at Lucy, my ol' lady Basset Hound, getting greyer and greyer and I know I'll be so sad when I lose her.
> 
> Enjoy your time with your kitty, and maybe she'll make it. Those meds can take awhile to work.
> 
> 
> 
> My sadness? Just with life right now. School is reaching fever pitch, my anxiety is through the roof and I'm having feelings I dare not share with the person who has hurt me. It sucks. I have to keep it inside, try to continue to work while feeling so sad and anxious, and it's definitely taking its toll.



Thanks MV. I'm sorry to hear you aren't feeling so great yourself.. sending positive thoughts your way


----------



## rg770Ibanez

My dreams, I wish I had like a bad dream filter. That would be ideal.


----------



## CAMellie

Today is my momma's birthday. She would have been 59. Today is also the 1st anniversary of the death of my best friend from lung cancer. All in all a very depressing day.


----------



## Deven

My fiance found a job. Great news, right? Yeah... he'll be gone 5 days out of the week. I knew what I was getting into when I started with someone with their CDL, but I was hoping, when he quit Swift, that this would change. He tried to find a non trucker job, with no success.

I want to cry.


----------



## Miss Vickie

thatgirl08 said:


> Thanks MV. I'm sorry to hear you aren't feeling so great yourself.. sending positive thoughts your way



Thanks. Things are pretty sucktastic right now, so any positive thoughts are appreciated. Between my friends and my doggies, I have some pretty awesome distraction.


----------



## Gingembre

Having a lonely day  which has been reinforced by the fact that I think I just pushed someone away that I didn't really want to. Sigh. I wish I had more friends around here.


----------



## Linda

My little boys broken heart. I can try my best but I just can't fix it.


----------



## Aust99

This damned cold.... My sinuses are so blocked!!!


----------



## rellis10

So yeah.... I didn't get the job, and now I just feel totally broken.

EVERYTHING felt good about it, a feeling I very rarely get about interviews, and I still couldn't get it. I know I should feel encouraged that they said I was really close to getting it, but I don't, I feel like I just got hit in the stomach with a brick.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

rellis10 said:


> So yeah.... I didn't get the job, and now I just feel totally broken.
> 
> EVERYTHING felt good about it, a feeling I very rarely get about interviews, and I still couldn't get it. I know I should feel encouraged that they said I was really close to getting it, but I don't, I feel like I just got hit in the stomach with a brick.


I'm so sorry to hear that, Rick.  I was really hoping this would be it for you this time.


----------



## Surlysomething

rellis10 said:


> So yeah.... I didn't get the job, and now I just feel totally broken.
> 
> EVERYTHING felt good about it, a feeling I very rarely get about interviews, and I still couldn't get it. I know I should feel encouraged that they said I was really close to getting it, but I don't, I feel like I just got hit in the stomach with a brick.


 

Bummer. Sorry you didn't get it.

Keep your spirits up though, something is around the corner.


----------



## HottiMegan

I'm sad that the boys are all going up to see the house and I cant because i am dizzy and weak from this damned stomach bug. I don't want to spread my germs into the house or to our realtor. There's an elderly couple who live in the house who aren't in great health, so i want to stay clear. I want to go and dream and enjoy measuring stuff for our fridge.


----------



## CAMellie

So my sister failed the drug test to go work where Adrian does...and magically Adrian gets fired with no notice and no written notices first. My sister has places she can go if necessary...Adrian has places to go if necessary...I'M BEYOND FUCKING SCREWED!!!!! I have NO place to go! Synthia's place to go is with some random dude, Adrian's place to go is with his family members that hate my guts.
All I can do now is pray like I've never prayed before that Adrian gets a job or that my SSI magically goes through. Otherwise, I'll be living under a fucking bridge.
Am I exaggerating? Hell no! This is a VERY dire situation for me and it makes me want to just do something drastic so I'll at least have a hospital bed to stay in.

I have 29 days and counting...


----------



## Diana_Prince245

rellis10 said:


> So yeah.... I didn't get the job, and now I just feel totally broken.
> 
> EVERYTHING felt good about it, a feeling I very rarely get about interviews, and I still couldn't get it. I know I should feel encouraged that they said I was really close to getting it, but I don't, I feel like I just got hit in the stomach with a brick.



Hugs! 

My stomach hates me. I know better than to eat meat, but it looked and smelled so danged good.


----------



## HottiMegan

One of my favorite people lost their battle with cancer. We're all devastated.


----------



## Surlysomething

HottiMegan said:


> One of my favorite people lost their battle with cancer. We're all devastated.



Oh Megan, i'm so sorry. *hug*


----------



## HottiMegan

Surlysomething said:


> Oh Megan, i'm so sorry. *hug*



Thank you. She seemed fine Friday and gone Saturday. She was so special to me. :really sad:


----------



## willowmoon

rellis10 said:


> So yeah.... I didn't get the job, and now I just feel totally broken.
> 
> EVERYTHING felt good about it, a feeling I very rarely get about interviews, and I still couldn't get it. I know I should feel encouraged that they said I was really close to getting it, but I don't, I feel like I just got hit in the stomach with a brick.



Sorry it didn't happen this time around, Rick ... don't give up though! 

And not to say it will happen in this particular instance, but we had a situation at a company where I used to work where they hired one guy who razzle-dazzled them at the interview. Once they hired him, it turned out the guy was flaky as hell. After only a month with his inconsistency in showing up to work on time (if at all), they decided to get rid of him and bring in the guy who was #2 on their list instead.

Yep, I was #2. :happy:


----------



## HDANGEL15

rellis10 said:


> So yeah.... I didn't get the job, and now I just feel totally broken.
> 
> EVERYTHING felt good about it, a feeling I very rarely get about interviews, and I still couldn't get it. I know I should feel encouraged that they said I was really close to getting it, but I don't, I feel like I just got hit in the stomach with a brick.



(((RICK I know from my own experience HOT FUCKN SHITTY THAT FEELS 

But all you can do is feel the pain and MOVE THE HELL ON to next...as Willow shared, you never know what the future holds....I feel you for reals...big ((((((hugs))))) to you my friend



HottiMegan said:


> One of my favorite people lost their battle with cancer. We're all devastated.




Megan- so sorry to hear of your lost..but at least now she is pain-free and there is another angel watching over you and your family....heartfelt (((HUGS)))) to you 

I am sad that my BFF is now on her 4th week of recovery and has been moved to an excellent REHAB facility specializing in brain injuries/strokes!!
Yesterday she said *HELLO HOW ARE YOU, I REALLY DON"T HAVE THE TIME FOR THIS, I WANT TO BE LEFT ALONE*...and other very angry nasty things <pout> 

I had downloaded one of her fave bands on my iPhone to play for her and we have hit many music festivals and shows, I couldn't possibly name them all, but it is the core of our friendship. 

I turned on my iPhone to play some tunes for her, she said *PLEASE TURN THAT OFF, I HATE MUSIC AND HAVE NEVER LIKED IT* 

my friend is addled and her wires are very crossed right now, she's not making sense at all...and I really don't know if she knows me...I realize


----------



## Saoirse

My bestie is on vacation and I miss him terribly cause I dont hang out with anyone else. 

Im starting to see how my life is laid out and how it will end. Me. Alone.

We just got another baby shower invitation for a family friend's daughter. My parent's friends with kids my age... they're all becoming grandparents. My mom really wants grandkids. I think secretly she feels sad when she hears about her friend's becoming grandparents... 

Another wedding invitation too! Just another reminder that I am along

I miss my dog so much. Sometimes I just think about her and cry. If I could guarantee that I'd somehow be with her, I'd kill myself right now. I miss her that much.

I can't even read the newspaper without crying. Politicians doing stupid things, drunk drivers killing people and destroying lives, people starving and hurting, husbands killing wives, mothers killing their kids... the newspaper makes me want to never leave the house.


----------



## Surlysomething

My second youngest sister was sick all weekend and yesterday and my Dad went and got her and took her to emergency. Test after test they finally determined she has appendicitis and she is in surgery right now.

I feel helpless. 

I'm also pissed because my family can't even pull it together during a time like this NOT to be fucking dicks.


----------



## Miss Vickie

Surlysomething said:


> My second youngest sister was sick all weekend and yesterday and my Dad went and got her and took her to emergency. Test after test they finally determined she has appendicitis and she is in surgery right now.
> 
> I feel helpless.
> 
> I'm also pissed because my family can't even pull it together during a time like this NOT to be fucking dicks.



Oh, jeez. I'm so sorry.  I'm glad she's getting surgery though and should be on the mend.

And yeah, families. Yeah. *sigh*

My sadness is just with one little thing right now -- life. I just can't seem to shake my sadness.


----------



## Surlysomething

Miss Vickie said:


> Oh, jeez. I'm so sorry.  I'm glad she's getting surgery though and should be on the mend.
> 
> And yeah, families. Yeah. *sigh*
> 
> My sadness is just with one little thing right now -- life. I just can't seem to shake my sadness.




Thanks, MV. I was just on the phone with my sis and she did GREAT and will be going home tomorrow probably. As for the family. FML. Can't choose them. Haha.

I'm sorry life is a struggle right now for you. We're in the same corner. *hug*
Feel better, ok? Maybe a cup of tea and bath?


----------



## HottiMegan

I'm glad your sister is doing okay. Sorry about the family though.


----------



## AtlantisAK

-sigh- There are a few things making me sad right now, despite being in a much happier place than I have been for a while. I'm sad to be closing down my first Etsy Shop, AtlantisAK and having a closing sale. With the demands of two other stores, something is gonna give if I don't give something up. Also, lately, I've been dealing with a lot of PTSD that was brought on from the ending of my last relationship back in April. Guess it's time to process all the miserable things.  I'm not normally a depressive, negative person, but it's not been an easy year.


----------



## Surlysomething

HottiMegan said:


> I'm glad your sister is doing okay. Sorry about the family though.



Thanks, Megan.


----------



## HDANGEL15

Surlysomething said:


> Thanks, MV. I was just on the phone with my sis and she did GREAT and will be going home tomorrow probably. As for the family. FML. Can't choose them. Haha.



yup the facts are you can not choose your family of origin...but you can choose how/when you deal with them. It seems like an inordinate amount of stress/sadness/pain goes with being a part of your family....just my thoughts

but so glad your sister is ON THE MEND


on another note, my friend that had the stroke a month ago is in REHAB now for speech/physical therapy.....I taught her my name last nite. Its really odd...I wonder if i will ever see my friend again...or if its always gonna be the new *Anne*...she is suffering from Receptive Aphasia and its in/out...on/off...she can't find words and makes up most of them. She talks nonstop and makes not much sense. I showed her pictures last nite and she didnt even know who she was...let alone me and other besty. Its very entertaining, as I never know what she is going to say....GOD GRANT ME THE SERENITY...and keep the prayers rolling


----------



## Surlysomething

HDANGEL15 said:


> yup the facts are you can not choose your family of origin...but you can choose how/when you deal with them. It seems like an inordinate amount of stress/sadness/pain goes with being a part of your family....just my thoughts
> 
> but so glad your sister is ON THE MEND
> 
> 
> on another note, my friend that had the stroke a month ago is in REHAB now for speech/physical therapy.....I taught her my name last nite. Its really odd...I wonder if i will ever see my friend again...or if its always gonna be the new *Anne*...she is suffering from Receptive Aphasia and its in/out...on/off...she can't find words and makes up most of them. She talks nonstop and makes not much sense. I showed her pictures last nite and she didnt even know who she was...let alone me and other besty. Its very entertaining, as I never know what she is going to say....GOD GRANT ME THE SERENITY...and keep the prayers rolling



Thanks, HD. I love my family, but i'm not a very superficial person so dealing with them is a nightmare.


----------



## Surlysomething

I just got home from work. Changed into comfy clothes and was making my way back from opening the living room window to let some fresh air in when I yawned, got a bit dizzy, lost my balance and fell.

Stupid MS. Suck a bag of dicks.


----------



## jayduhgr8

Being alone in this house day after day. I can't say I actually need like a Girlfriend but I honestly feel I have like no one. I rarely talk to family and friends just seem to up and move past me because I don't live my life as they do. So I don't know right now I just feel down because for the first time in a long while I feel alone.


----------



## Deacone

I'm sad because I can't seem to find a decent pair of stretchy work pants. Guy ones are too expensive and girl ones have NO pockets.

That just royally fucks me off. 

NOT ALL GIRLS CARRY BAGS Y'KNOW, WE DO USE POCKETS!


----------



## Surlysomething

I had one of the worst days of my life yesterday.

I tried to reach out to a 'friend' to talk about what happened and was ignored.
I'm emotionally drained and numb.

I want to get in my car and never come back.


----------



## CAMellie

I just found out that my "other mother" Jan passed away this morning. She was stubborn, bossy, pushy, and could be a big pain in the ass...but she would give you the shirt off of her back if you needed it. I'm just so very glad I was able to visit her in the nursing home before she died.

R.I.P. Mom Jan
I'll always miss you!!!


----------



## mel

Surlysomething said:


> I had one of the worst days of my life yesterday.
> 
> I tried to reach out to a 'friend' to talk about what happened and was ignored.
> I'm emotionally drained and numb.
> 
> I want to get in my car and never come back.



(((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))) you are loved!!



CAMellie said:


> I just found out that my "other mother" Jan passed away this morning. She was stubborn, bossy, pushy, and could be a big pain in the ass...but she would give you the shirt off of her back if you needed it. I'm just so very glad I was able to visit her in the nursing home before she died.
> 
> R.I.P. Mom Jan
> I'll always miss you!!!



(((((((hugs))))))))


----------



## CAMellie

mel said:


> (((((((hugs))))))))



Thank you, Mel! *hugs*


----------



## thatgirl08

I'm sad that I finally got what I wanted with the guy I've been seeing for a few months.. as in, he finally agreed to be official.. but now he's being weird and standoffish and acts like he doesn't really want to see me. I can never win. I'm sad and angry at myself for letting myself get sucked into this toxic situation again. I know I deserve better. I deserve someone who wants to spend his time with me, someone available - truly emotionally available, not just physically.. someone who can treat me with the respect I deserve. I'm sad that I've become the demure, apologetic girl who gets walked on. How did I let this happen? How did I become the girl who apologizes for EVERYTHING? Who walks on eggshells? Who is afraid to disagree? Who is afraid to stand up for herself? That just isn't me. I just keep thinking if I say the right thing or do the right thing or maybe if I just sit quietly and let him ramble to me, maybe just maybe he'll be satisfied.. maybe I'll make him happy for a day. I know in my mind it's wrong but my heart won't let me leave. I'm sad I've let this situation persist for this long and that I don't have the respect for myself to leave. I'm sad I've let other people talk me into it, to just "give it a chance" because I'm young and have the time. Yeah.. as I sit here letting this eat away at my mental and emotional well being little by little. I'm sad I've all these hours and days and weeks and months crying and worrying over someone who truly doesn't deserve a second of my life.

I'm even more sad because I know tomorrow I'll wipe away the tears and force a smile and try again.


----------



## CAMellie

My "little" girl just called me to tell me she's on her way to the hospital because my grandson hasn't moved (she's 35 weeks) in 24 hours! I am absolutely terrified right now!!!!


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Oh geez, how scary.  Keep us updated! She and the baby are in my thoughts, as are you.


----------



## balletguy

oh my god....good luck


----------



## HottiMegan

CAMellie said:


> My "little" girl just called me to tell me she's on her way to the hospital because my grandson hasn't moved (she's 35 weeks) in 24 hours! I am absolutely terrified right now!!!!



I hope it turns out ok. I had an issue like that with Alex. He scared the crap out of me.


----------



## CAMellie

Thanks, everyone! Turns out she has a uti and is dehydrated so he wasn't moving enough for her to notice. He's doing just fine! :happy:


----------



## CastingPearls

CAMellie said:


> Thanks, everyone! Turns out she has a uti and is dehydrated so he wasn't moving enough for her to notice. He's doing just fine! :happy:


Thank God!!!!!!


----------



## balletguy

I should be asleep now...


----------



## HottiMegan

CAMellie said:


> Thanks, everyone! Turns out she has a uti and is dehydrated so he wasn't moving enough for her to notice. He's doing just fine! :happy:



yay!! I'm happy it was minor


----------



## Linda

CAMellie said:


> Thanks, everyone! Turns out she has a uti and is dehydrated so he wasn't moving enough for her to notice. He's doing just fine! :happy:




Thank God. Sorry she is sick but so happy to hear the baby is ok.


----------



## bigpapi4u

my iphone died today now im stuck with a crappy phone for a few days:doh:


----------



## Ruffie

This past year was challenging. Work changed for me after ten years running te youth centre, I went to running our middle years alternate school a project I started with our teacher. I worked mornings there and afternoons at the youth centre for part of a year to do this pilot project. Our photography business took a huge hit in this economy and we are going to close this year as its just not profitable. We will still do photography as its our passion for friends and family and artistically but that 27 years of our life is soon coming to a close. My mother is 80 years old, still living in her home and there are responsibilities there. Add to it that my son bought a house with his girlfriend who has two children from a previous relationship and we have become instant grandparents there as well as trying to keep up with my children of the heart and grandchildren I am exhausted. In October I hit a deer on the hiway at night and had whiplash and a low grade back injury as well as totalling off my jeep. And three falls on ice and snow this winter was not fun either. Which lead up to all the recovery with occupational therapy, massages, doctor visits and having to work through the process. Then there was shopping for a new vehicle on the little amount insurance gave me for the settlement and then added debt to obtain a new one. Then a second car accident where a wheel came off on our van on the freeway a few hundred feet from a bridge. Thankfully someone up there was helping and my husband was able to steer us to roadside without a major car pileup. So once again there was the cost of repairs and recovery.
But the Cherry on the cake of my year was two weeks ago when on Tuesday we finally got the diagnosis that my mother has a rare form of lymphatic cancer after breast cancer surgery and her recovery back at the end of January. Then on Thursday got a lay off notice from my job of nearly 11 years and will be unemployed as of March 31st. My boss offered to give me a lower paying position with more responsibilities and some of our staff will just be gone as funding cuts means the end of some programs. However after thinking about it I now need to do physiotherapy to recover from injuries, and with my mom's illness and being an only child I have to make her my priority right now so I am taking the lay off. We go for a scan next week to see where the cancer has spread to and to determine treatment. 
Sorry to be such a long post but haven't been around much as I dealt with all of this and thought I would explain.


----------



## Surlysomething

Ruffie said:


> This past year was challenging. Work changed for me after ten years running te youth centre, I went to running our middle years alternate school a project I started with our teacher. I worked mornings there and afternoons at the youth centre for part of a year to do this pilot project. Our photography business took a huge hit in this economy and we are going to close this year as its just not profitable. We will still do photography as its our passion for friends and family and artistically but that 27 years of our life is soon coming to a close. My mother is 80 years old, still living in her home and there are responsibilities there. Add to it that my son bought a house with his girlfriend who has two children from a previous relationship and we have become instant grandparents there as well as trying to keep up with my children of the heart and grandchildren I am exhausted. In October I hit a deer on the hiway at night and had whiplash and a low grade back injury as well as totalling off my jeep. And three falls on ice and snow this winter was not fun either. Which lead up to all the recovery with occupational therapy, massages, doctor visits and having to work through the process. Then there was shopping for a new vehicle on the little amount insurance gave me for the settlement and then added debt to obtain a new one. Then a second car accident where a wheel came off on our van on the freeway a few hundred feet from a bridge. Thankfully someone up there was helping and my husband was able to steer us to roadside without a major car pileup. So once again there was the cost of repairs and recovery.
> But the Cherry on the cake of my year was two weeks ago when on Tuesday we finally got the diagnosis that my mother has a rare form of lymphatic cancer after breast cancer surgery and her recovery back at the end of January. Then on Thursday got a lay off notice from my job of nearly 11 years and will be unemployed as of March 31st. My boss offered to give me a lower paying position with more responsibilities and some of our staff will just be gone as funding cuts means the end of some programs. However after thinking about it I now need to do physiotherapy to recover from injuries, and with my mom's illness and being an only child I have to make her my priority right now so I am taking the lay off. We go for a scan next week to see where the cancer has spread to and to determine treatment.
> Sorry to be such a long post but haven't been around much as I dealt with all of this and thought I would explain.



Oh wow, what a challenging year you've been having. I'll keep you and yours in my thoughts, R.

Try and be easy on yourself. Even if it's only having a quiet bath and a cup of tea or taking a nap. Lots of love your way.


----------



## Fattitude1

Had to come home from a great family visit in MD. 

(see also What Makes You Happy)


----------



## imaginarydiva21

im too accident prone at the moment and in even more pain than i was


----------



## Surlysomething

Feeling pretty lonely. *sad trumpet noise*


----------



## TwilightStarr

Tonight is the season finale of The Walking Dead! 

Also I am sad that Robert Kirkman(writer of Walking Dead) is married because I have a huge crush on him! lol


----------



## ConnieLynn

I'm bummed the weekend is over. Went by much too fast and I'm not looking forward to Monday. My job has become exhausting. I really need to gear up to look for something else, but that also means relocation, and as tired as I am of this town, I've settled in, and starting over again is a bitch.


----------



## CAMellie

Soooo so so so sick!!! It hurts to move...hurts to breath...when I cough (which is a LOT) it feels like there are shards of glass in my throat. 
My hubby just started a new job so I'm on my own because we can't afford for him to get sick, too.


----------



## HottiMegan

CAMellie said:


> Soooo so so so sick!!! It hurts to move...hurts to breath...when I cough (which is a LOT) it feels like there are shards of glass in my throat.
> My hubby just started a new job so I'm on my own because we can't afford for him to get sick, too.



I'm sorry you're so miserable but glad your hubby got a new job. I know you were worried about the job situation. I hope you feel better soon.


----------



## agnieszka

i wanted to change a flat from 2 bed to 1 bed. today i have been offered a flat in a very good location but in a terrible condition (v good rent tho). have not a clue whether to take it or not (do not have enough money to make the new flat look nice)....

i wanted to rent out my current flat but nobody is interested (tho 2 weeks ago people were fighting to stay here). i do hate people in glasgow- bunch of irresponsible idiots unable to make a decission :-(


----------



## Luv2BNaughty

A few things...not so much sad, but has me a little down. =/


----------



## catracha

just learned today that I have to have knee replacement surgery :"(


----------



## CastingPearls

It's the first anniversary of my brother's death.


----------



## Mathias

I think it's become clear that the girl I have a crush on doesn't feel the same way I do about her, and is attracted to an absolute asshole. Story of my fucking life.


----------



## CAMellie

CastingPearls said:


> It's the first anniversary of my brother's death.



*HUGE HUGS*


----------



## imaginarydiva21

Mathias said:


> I think it's become clear that the girl I have a crush on doesn't feel the same way I do about her, and is attracted to an absolute asshole. Story of my fucking life.



Then she aint the right girl for you ..... everyone deserves someone who will recieve as much love as they give .................


----------



## CAMellie

I'm feeling so sad for my hubby today. He didn't get to bed until 11 because he was taking care of me, then I woke him up at 3 because I panicked about my inability to breathe - he rubbed Vick's on my chest, made me hot tea, and forced me to take a huge amount of Tylenol when my fever spiked at 102.6. I moved to the couch so he could sleep some more, but he had to get up at 5:30 to get ready for work.


----------



## Surlysomething

Thanks for ignoring me for days.

I guess your true colours have been shown.


----------



## Dromond

Nearly everything.

It's just not funny anymore.


----------



## Mathias

My friend is depressed and I don't know what I can do to help him.


----------



## Saoirse

My friend hung out with herpes girl again. Cause shes little and bouncy and cute and LOOKS AND ACTS 12. Trust me buddy, the cute kid act gets really old really fucking quick. And just wait till you try to get in her pants and she tells you she's flaring up.

I shouldn't be so mean, cause shes sweet and we're friends but this is my 3rd guy friend that she has fucked with. The other two stopped talking to me cause they were into her, then she let them both down! So one of them I haven't seen in over a year and the other one, I only see on holidays when I bring him things. Its like they know they hurt me and then she hurt them and now they're embarrassed.

get the fuck away from my boys, herpes girl.


----------



## Surlysomething

Mathias said:


> My friend is depressed and I don't know what I can do to help him.


 

Just let him know that you're there if he needs to talk. That's the best thing.


----------



## danielson123

So in the last couple weeks, I have been making changes in my life to help me feel like I'm not just sitting back and letting life pass me by. I've started exercising, picking up books that aren't just for fun, cut out a lot of video game time, and, most recently, started picking up French. I'm beginning to feel better about things, but there's still this part of me, a big part, that feels like I'm going nowhere. I know it's because I still haven't gone back to school, that I still live at home, that I don't have my driver's license yet, and that I don't have a real job. I just feel like no matter what I do to try and make my life better, it just doesn't seem to make a difference to me.


----------



## bigpapi4u

Im still waiting for my iphone parts from hon kong I cant stand this crappy phone I have right now!


----------



## Takeshi

life....in every aspect...

school...work...family...relationships...everything.
This past week I fell into deep depression, and balled my eyes out, yet it's such a complicated thing to describe! It's a compliation of EVERYTHING combined, to make the "cluster-fuck" of emotions going through right now...so that's why I havn't been posting on Dims as of recently...


----------



## Surlysomething

That the love I used to have is slowly turning into disappointment and a nagging hurt.


----------



## Surlysomething

Takeshi said:


> life....in every aspect...
> 
> school...work...family...relationships...everything.
> This past week I fell into deep depression, and balled my eyes out, yet it's such a complicated thing to describe! It's a compliation of EVERYTHING combined, to make the "cluster-fuck" of emotions going through right now...so that's why I havn't been posting on Dims as of recently...



Try and be easy on yourself. Crying is good though.
Try and talk to family and friends, don't be too alone.

*hug*


----------



## Deven

My brother has 3 different "baby mommas." Well, one of them passed away yesterday. I've never met my niece, but she had a sister as well and her mother was a single mother. I fully admit my brother is a deadbeat dad. My mom was freaking out about the girls staying together, because even though we don't know Hannah, there's no reason at this stage for her to be ripped from her sister.

We found out that the kids will be staying with their grandma. My brother will not move for custody unless something happens to the grandmother. 

I'm just heartsick for my niece and her sister because I lost my dad at just slightly younger than them. I don't know her, but I love her as much as I can (and it's not like we haven't tried to get to know her. Not all of my brother's former flames are as responsive to his family being involved as my ex sister-in-law. Not that I blame them...)


----------



## HottiMegan

I miss my aunt in law. Yesterday marked a month. Not a day goes by that i don't miss her. She was so excited that we're getting a house. There's never enough time.


----------



## penguin

I don't know what it is, I just feel really down today.


----------



## WVMountainrear

penguin said:


> I don't know what it is, I just feel really down today.



That was me yesterday, hon. *hugs*


----------



## penguin

lovelylady78 said:


> That was me yesterday, hon. *hugs*



Thanks  I'm guessing it's mostly a hormonal fluctuation combined with not enough sleep.


----------



## TwilightStarr

I don't know what causing it but a wave a sadness just hit me real hard, so I am going to make it worse by listening to some Adele and if I had a bottle of Jack I would add that in too.


----------



## Mathias

A combination of not sleeping well over the past few nights and listening to negativity from friends is making me sad and stressed.


----------



## MRdobolina

losing out on an ebay auction .. yeah i gets shallow like that


----------



## Gingembre

My granny died this evening. She was 96, so had a damn good innings, and she hadn't really been "living" for the past 5 or so years since Dementia took hold, but it's still sad. I feel sad for my dad because my mum was a completely unreasonable bitch and he didn't need her sniping and aggression tonight.


----------



## Surlysomething

Gingembre said:


> My granny died this evening. She was 96, so had a damn good innings, and she hadn't really been "living" for the past 5 or so years since Dementia took hold, but it's still sad. I feel sad for my dad because my mum was a completely unreasonable bitch and he didn't need her sniping and aggression tonight.




Awwww, i'm sorry about your Granny. *hug*


----------



## CastingPearls

Gingembre said:


> My granny died this evening. She was 96, so had a damn good innings, and she hadn't really been "living" for the past 5 or so years since Dementia took hold, but it's still sad. I feel sad for my dad because my mum was a completely unreasonable bitch and he didn't need her sniping and aggression tonight.


I'm so sorry, sweetie.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Gingembre said:


> My granny died this evening. She was 96, so had a damn good innings, and she hadn't really been "living" for the past 5 or so years since Dementia took hold, but it's still sad. I feel sad for my dad because my mum was a completely unreasonable bitch and he didn't need her sniping and aggression tonight.



Even when it's not unexpected it's hard. *Hugs,* Ginge.


----------



## Gingembre

Surlysomething said:


> Awwww, i'm sorry about your Granny. *hug*





CastingPearls said:


> I'm so sorry, sweetie.





BigBeautifulMe said:


> Even when it's not unexpected it's hard. *Hugs,* Ginge.



Thank you, ladies. Means a lot.


----------



## TwilightStarr

Gingembre said:


> My granny died this evening. She was 96, so had a damn good innings, and she hadn't really been "living" for the past 5 or so years since Dementia took hold, but it's still sad. I feel sad for my dad because my mum was a completely unreasonable bitch and he didn't need her sniping and aggression tonight.




I am so sorry


----------



## penguin

I'm so sorry, Gingembre.


----------



## Sweetie

I'm sad because I feel like I just can't seem to get the love/relationship thing right. 48 years old and I feel like I know less than most 13 year olds about love and people in general. I'm sad cause the people I trust with my heart always seem to use my trust to twist the knife when they're done with me. I'm sad cause I just don't know how to play the games that people engage in. I feel so darn lost.


----------



## Deacone

All my friends are out enjoying themselves in the sun drinking cider, and I'm stuck at work....always stuck at work.


----------



## Surlysomething

I reached out tonight because I feel so down and got blown off (as usual).

I try so hard not to be disappointed but it happens so much that I don't know why I try anymore.


----------



## CastingPearls

Surlysomething said:


> I reached out tonight because I feel so down and got blown off (as usual).
> 
> I try so hard not to be disappointed but it happens so much that I don't know why I try anymore.


Hugs..........................


----------



## Surlysomething

CastingPearls said:


> Hugs..........................



Thanks, Lainey. I think I need to find a little island of my own and tough it out.


----------



## CastingPearls

Surlysomething said:


> Thanks, Lainey. I think I need to find a little island of my own and tough it out.


Just remember you have an S.O.S. to talk to me anytime, though.


----------



## Surlysomething

CastingPearls said:


> Just remember you have an S.O.S. to talk to me anytime, though.



<3 Merci, E.


----------



## HottiMegan

Surlysomething said:


> I reached out tonight because I feel so down and got blown off (as usual).
> 
> I try so hard not to be disappointed but it happens so much that I don't know why I try anymore.



{{hugs}} I'm sorry.


----------



## HDANGEL15

Surlysomething said:


> I reached out tonight because I feel so down and got blown off (as usual).
> 
> I try so hard not to be disappointed but it happens so much that I don't know why I try anymore.



((((SURLY GIRL))) <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 TO YOU sister.....


----------



## bigpapi4u

My grandma is still at the hospital.
Yestarday her sugar levels were at 580 we called and ambulance now she is stable .get well soon granma


----------



## WVMountainrear

Worrying...questions...the unknown...


----------



## Voyager

I've lost 100 pounds in the last year but I still have another 100 to go. :doh:

As much as I'd like to believe in fat acceptance, the world really is a shallow place. I'd like to be treated like a normal human being at some point in my life.


----------



## Ruffie

We went to the Doctor for mom yesterday and he read the results of her scan. SInce her surgery in January to remove lump in breast and tumour in the lymph nodes under her arm three more masses show up on the scan. One more in the breast, another under the arm and a large grapefruit sized on in the abdomen. Things moving much faster than we had anticipated. And have to wait to go to Cancer centre until the 12th for full diagnosis and treatment options. She is 80 and has many other health issues so not sure just how much can be done.


----------



## HottiMegan

Ruffie said:


> We went to the Doctor for mom yesterday and he read the results of her scan. SInce her surgery in January to remove lump in breast and tumour in the lymph nodes under her arm three more masses show up on the scan. One more in the breast, another under the arm and a large grapefruit sized on in the abdomen. Things moving much faster than we had anticipated. And have to wait to go to Cancer centre until the 12th for full diagnosis and treatment options. She is 80 and has many other health issues so not sure just how much can be done.



{{hugs}} I'm sorry. Cancer is a terrible thing. I hope something can be done.


----------



## Surlysomething

Ruffie said:


> We went to the Doctor for mom yesterday and he read the results of her scan. SInce her surgery in January to remove lump in breast and tumour in the lymph nodes under her arm three more masses show up on the scan. One more in the breast, another under the arm and a large grapefruit sized on in the abdomen. Things moving much faster than we had anticipated. And have to wait to go to Cancer centre until the 12th for full diagnosis and treatment options. She is 80 and has many other health issues so not sure just how much can be done.


 
I'm so sorry, Ruth. I'll keep you and yours in my thoughts.

-big hug-


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Oh no, Ruth, that's awful. I'm so sorry you're going through this.  There's nothing harder than watching a loved one suffer from cancer. Just holler if you need to vent or cry. *Hugs*


----------



## CastingPearls

Ruffie said:


> We went to the Doctor for mom yesterday and he read the results of her scan. SInce her surgery in January to remove lump in breast and tumour in the lymph nodes under her arm three more masses show up on the scan. One more in the breast, another under the arm and a large grapefruit sized on in the abdomen. Things moving much faster than we had anticipated. And have to wait to go to Cancer centre until the 12th for full diagnosis and treatment options. She is 80 and has many other health issues so not sure just how much can be done.


I'm sorry Ruth. I really hope something can be done. Hugs.


----------



## Ruffie

Thank you to each and every one of you. Just had one hell of a year with two car accidents and three falls screwing up my body resulting in hours of occupational therapy, massage, physiotherapy and chiropractic treatments. Getting laid off from work and now moms illness. Trying to do the best I can to keep on keeping on, but there are times that it gets the better of me. I appreciate the kind words and positive thoughts folks!


----------



## moore2me

Ruffie, 

After hearing the new cancer diagnosis on your mom, I went back and re-read your post about the accidents and the loss of your job. First, I hope your mom can make it thru this latest set of cancers in the best way possible. It may involve more radiation and/or chemo therapy, or more surgery or new therapies I don't understand. Having been thru this fight with several family members and friends, a few things helped us . . .

You should take advantage of the good time when it comes. This may be looking thru family albums or something as simple as driving to town and getting a Wendy's frosty. Be sure and encourage other family members and children to interact with mom & not stay away.

Get second opinions if you feel the need. Sometimes therapy may be too aggressive for your loved one or sometimes the therapy may not be aggressive enough. There is a vast difference in what is available and what she needs and wants.

With your multiple injuries and accidents, you need extra care for yourself. Do not let yourself get down. Check your bone and your calcium and watch your diet. Take a yoga class or some balance enhancing exercises. Small but regular workouts will go a long way in helping you keep going on the rocky road you are on. Make a little "me" time and make time to spend with hubby that will let you both decompress.

Visit some websites on dealing with a family member with cancer. These sites can give out valuable information and let you talk with others going thru the same things you & your mom are facing.

And last, if you haven't already had an attorney or legal advisor check your mom's effects and make sure they are in order. Things like power of attorney, wills, bequests, taxes, executors, location of records and other arrangements are much, much easier to be made now when your mom is alive and competent.

You are a smart lady and may have already done many of these things. If you have, good for you. Handling mom as a patient (as you know) is not easy. Your faith in a higher power or religious beliefs can be a big help. Hopefully, your mom will also have a spiritual advisor that can help her too.


----------



## Ruffie

Thanks so much for your thoughtful post! I have been exercising as part of my therapy and to manage stress for myself. Mom and I have spent a lot of time talking and sorting things out. We are hopefully in the process of changing the will and getting power of attourney in place. I have offered to help her. Sort and organize things and I am sure that will trigger some good memories. My son and his family going to try to be more involved than they have in order to make the best of the time they have left with her. And my youngest as well will look at spending more time.
I have not yet sought out support as right now we do not know exactly what form of lymphatic cancer we are dealing its, timelines and so on. I am thankful that I have my immediate and family of the heart, good friends and my husband to help me here and of course all of you to listen to me vent. It is appreciated


----------



## Deven

I just had to sell my Rammstein tickets because I noticed it was the day before 2 finals...

My heart broke.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

My stepmom passed away in her sleep sometime last night, my dad woke up and found her next to him this morning. 

I watched my 9 year old brother, I watched another piece of his heart just shatter. I don't know how much I will be online due to all of this, either, we won't know a lot of things until tomorrow at best. Everyone is still in shock, my dad refuses to show his true emotion until my brother goes to bed. I'm on no sleep because I had JUST dozed off when my dad came to my door this morning to tell me he was calling 911 again.. 

ughn. I'm.. honestly mostly sad _for_ my brother and dad, they were closer to her than I was. But I was just talking to her last night, before she went to bed at like midnight. We were just laughing and having a good time.. and the next time I see her, she's .. blue


----------



## Surlysomething

Your Plump Princess said:


> My stepmom passed away in her sleep sometime last night, my dad woke up and found her next to him this morning.
> 
> I watched my 9 year old brother, I watched another piece of his heart just shatter. I don't know how much I will be online due to all of this, either, we won't know a lot of things until tomorrow at best. Everyone is still in shock, my dad refuses to show his true emotion until my brother goes to bed. I'm on no sleep because I had JUST dozed off when my dad came to my door this morning to tell me he was calling 911 again..
> 
> ughn. I'm.. honestly mostly sad _for_ my brother and dad, they were closer to her than I was. But I was just talking to her last night, before she went to bed at like midnight. We were just laughing and having a good time.. and the next time I see her, she's .. blue



I'm sorry for your loss. Losing a parent it tough...hang in there and try and be a comfort to your brother if he needs you. Kids are tougher than we know.


----------



## CastingPearls

Your Plump Princess said:


> My stepmom passed away in her sleep sometime last night, my dad woke up and found her next to him this morning.
> 
> I watched my 9 year old brother, I watched another piece of his heart just shatter. I don't know how much I will be online due to all of this, either, we won't know a lot of things until tomorrow at best. Everyone is still in shock, my dad refuses to show his true emotion until my brother goes to bed. I'm on no sleep because I had JUST dozed off when my dad came to my door this morning to tell me he was calling 911 again..
> 
> ughn. I'm.. honestly mostly sad _for_ my brother and dad, they were closer to her than I was. But I was just talking to her last night, before she went to bed at like midnight. We were just laughing and having a good time.. and the next time I see her, she's .. blue


I'm so sorry, sweetheart.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

I've already told like, all of my friends here I won't be seen much or at all unless my brother is sleeping or gone out to lunch with family. I .. She was his mom, she was his world... and I think, the worst part is just like everyone else, he keeps saying "I never got to wish her happy anniversary" because today is my dad and my stepmothers 5th wedding anniversary.. Heh. 


He's just cycling right now.
Calm, sad, calm, excited, sad, repeat.

He's playing Kingdom Hearts 2 right now up in my room with me, which is good, he needs a little distraction too right now.

He has ODD, ADHD, PTSD, and according to his mom was diagnosed Bi-Polar [specifically Rapid-Cycling]


----------



## Ruffie

So sorry for your loss. Take good care of yourself and those you love!


----------



## imfree

Your Plump Princess said:


> My stepmom passed away in her sleep sometime last night, my dad woke up and found her next to him this morning.
> 
> I watched my 9 year old brother, I watched another piece of his heart just shatter. I don't know how much I will be online due to all of this, either, we won't know a lot of things until tomorrow at best. Everyone is still in shock, my dad refuses to show his true emotion until my brother goes to bed. I'm on no sleep because I had JUST dozed off when my dad came to my door this morning to tell me he was calling 911 again..
> 
> ughn. I'm.. honestly mostly sad _for_ my brother and dad, they were closer to her than I was. But I was just talking to her last night, before she went to bed at like midnight. We were just laughing and having a good time.. and the next time I see her, she's .. blue



You have my most heart felt condolences, thoughts, and prayers, YPP.


----------



## Deven

Your Plump Princess said:


> My stepmom passed away in her sleep sometime last night, my dad woke up and found her next to him this morning.
> 
> I watched my 9 year old brother, I watched another piece of his heart just shatter. I don't know how much I will be online due to all of this, either, we won't know a lot of things until tomorrow at best. Everyone is still in shock, my dad refuses to show his true emotion until my brother goes to bed. I'm on no sleep because I had JUST dozed off when my dad came to my door this morning to tell me he was calling 911 again..
> 
> ughn. I'm.. honestly mostly sad _for_ my brother and dad, they were closer to her than I was. But I was just talking to her last night, before she went to bed at like midnight. We were just laughing and having a good time.. and the next time I see her, she's .. blue



*hugs* We're all here if you need an ear. I'm sorry for your loss, and especially your father and brother's loss. I was around his age when my father died (I was 6) and it was such a hard thing to grow up dealing with. He'll need lots of love and care, and you should suggest to your father that he look into grief counseling for both of them, but especially your brother. To this day, I wish my mother had gotten me grief counseling because at that age you really don't know how to cope.


----------



## moore2me

Your Plump Princess said:


> My stepmom passed away in her sleep sometime last night, my dad woke up and found her next to him this morning.
> 
> I watched my 9 year old brother, I watched another piece of his heart just shatter. I don't know how much I will be online due to all of this, either, we won't know a lot of things until tomorrow at best. Everyone is still in shock, *my dad refuses to show his true emotion until my brother goes to bed*. I'm on no sleep because I had JUST dozed off when my dad came to my door this morning to tell me he was calling 911 again..
> 
> ughn. I'm.. honestly mostly sad _for_ my brother and dad, they were closer to her than I was. But I was just talking to her last night, before she went to bed at like midnight. We were just laughing and having a good time.. and the next time I see her, she's .. blue



I am sorry to hear of your step-mom's passing. You and your family have my prayers in this hard time.

I bolded a sentence in your previous post where you say your dad doesn't want to show emotion in front of your brother. You could help these two guys (men often have trouble expressing feelings) Dad & brother to deal with this important lady's death in a different manner. Since your brother has not been thru the grieving process before - it would be helpful to him if your dad could show him how by sharing their exeriences and showing the child what to do. Hiding grief from him will confuse the boy and keep the boy from getting some closure himself.

If the guys need help you can discuss this with a funeral director, a minister or grief counselor as Devin described. If you are concerned about the lad's ability to handle grief, you can also talk to the boy's teacher(s) or the school guidance couselor.


----------



## Jeeshcristina

Your Plump Princess said:


> My stepmom passed away in her sleep sometime last night, my dad woke up and found her next to him this morning.
> 
> I watched my 9 year old brother, I watched another piece of his heart just shatter. I don't know how much I will be online due to all of this, either, we won't know a lot of things until tomorrow at best. Everyone is still in shock, my dad refuses to show his true emotion until my brother goes to bed. I'm on no sleep because I had JUST dozed off when my dad came to my door this morning to tell me he was calling 911 again..
> 
> ughn. I'm.. honestly mostly sad _for_ my brother and dad, they were closer to her than I was. But I was just talking to her last night, before she went to bed at like midnight. We were just laughing and having a good time.. and the next time I see her, she's .. blue



I'm so sorry to hear this. It's so hard on kids to lose a parent, and I'm glad you can be there for your brother. He's probably going to have a rough time of it, but with the support from family, you will all pull through.

Let us know if we can do anything to help, again, I'm so sorry.


----------



## penguin

Your Plump Princess said:


> My stepmom passed away in her sleep sometime last night, my dad woke up and found her next to him this morning.



I am so sorry for your loss.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers. Kane and Dad seem to be doing better today, me and my brother are going to make a scrapbook of all the pictures and memories we have of Mom (Him and his mom did something similar when his biological father passed away a few years back) and we're gonna take it day by day. My brother also has a "Talking Doctor" appointment coming up which is good.


----------



## TwilightStarr

That I have to go to the dentist tomorrow and have a cavity filled, which I have never had to do  I am so scared!!


----------



## Linda

bigpapi4u said:


> My grandma is still at the hospital.
> Yestarday her sugar levels were at 580 we called and ambulance now she is stable .get well soon granma



I am hoping your grandma gets better real soon. 



Ruffie said:


> We went to the Doctor for mom yesterday and he read the results of her scan. SInce her surgery in January to remove lump in breast and tumour in the lymph nodes under her arm three more masses show up on the scan. One more in the breast, another under the arm and a large grapefruit sized on in the abdomen. Things moving much faster than we had anticipated. And have to wait to go to Cancer centre until the 12th for full diagnosis and treatment options. She is 80 and has many other health issues so not sure just how much can be done.



Oh Ruth, I am so sorry to hear this. Cancer is a wicked thing. Sending prayers your way.



Your Plump Princess said:


> My stepmom passed away in her sleep sometime last night, my dad woke up and found her next to him this morning.
> 
> I watched my 9 year old brother, I watched another piece of his heart just shatter. I don't know how much I will be online due to all of this, either, we won't know a lot of things until tomorrow at best. Everyone is still in shock, my dad refuses to show his true emotion until my brother goes to bed. I'm on no sleep because I had JUST dozed off when my dad came to my door this morning to tell me he was calling 911 again..
> 
> ughn. I'm.. honestly mostly sad _for_ my brother and dad, they were closer to her than I was. But I was just talking to her last night, before she went to bed at like midnight. We were just laughing and having a good time.. and the next time I see her, she's .. blue



Wow, I am so sorry for your loss. Don't forget to take care of yourself while you are being the rock that you need to be for everyone else. ((((hugs))))


----------



## bigpapi4u

Linda said:


> I am hoping your grandma gets better real soon.


thank you linda she is still at the hospital but she is stable right now theyre trying to give her a blood tranfusion but she keeps rejecting it


----------



## Kamily

My youngest daughter has a bad ear infection.  She didnt get any sleep last night because she couldnt lay on that side. I took her to the doctor today and got an antibiotic and some drops to put in her ear. Shes off from school for a few days.


----------



## Saoirse

I feel like shit in every way possible and I have no one to vent to. I dont wanna be home, cause shits fucked up there. I stopped by my homeboy's place to see what he was up to, but he had some friends and the gf over, so I just gave him what I bought him on my vaca, loved up his pup and then left. Im at the bestie's house now, chillin with his cat, but he's AT THE BOYFRIEND'S HOUSE AGAIN. I havent seen my best friend in a week and I wont see him till tomorrow night and its pissing me off that he's never around anymore.


----------



## CarlaSixx

Unrequited love. Or, at least, what I believe is unrequited love.

Story of everyone's life. I know... but there's just something about this one that's different, for me.


----------



## penguin

The whole being lied to and dumped thing. The needing to cry but I can't while my daughter is around, because every time I cry, she cries, and I can't keep upsetting her. The way she's literally forcing me to wear the bracelet he gave me, though I don't want to. She wants me to wear it, telling me it will make me feel better, and grabbed my hand and pushed the bracelet back on. I don't want to wear it, but I don't want to upset her any more than I already have. I'll just have to hold it together until tonight.


----------



## Twilley

I kind of stay that way lately


----------



## seavixen

My dad has bone cancer and is in the hospital.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

I'm really sorry, (((((((((vixen)))))))))). Please know there are well-wishes coming your way from across the country.


----------



## Linda

seavixen said:


> My dad has bone cancer and is in the hospital.




(((((Hugs))))) I am so sorry to hear this. Keeping you in my prayers.


----------



## imfree

seavixen said:


> My dad has bone cancer and is in the hospital.



Well wishes & prayers ((Vixen & Dad)) well wishes & prayers.


----------



## seavixen

BigBeautifulMe said:


> I'm really sorry, (((((((((vixen)))))))))). Please know there are well-wishes coming your way from across the country.





Linda said:


> (((((Hugs))))) I am so sorry to hear this. Keeping you in my prayers.





imfree said:


> Well wishes & prayers ((Vixen & Dad)) well wishes & prayers.



Thank you. Trying to keep positive; this is his third battle with cancer. It seems this instance is related to the first one, some 15 years ago.


----------



## thatgirl08

I had to put my cat to sleep last night  Miss her already. I had her since I was 7 and didn't want to let her go but knew it was for the best.


----------



## CastingPearls

seavixen said:


> My dad has bone cancer and is in the hospital.



I'm so sorry. Hugs and sending positive energy, love and light. 



thatgirl08 said:


> I had to put my cat to sleep last night  Miss her already. I had her since I was 7 and didn't want to let her go but knew it was for the best.



I've been there many times and it never got easier. I'm sorry for your loss.


----------



## willowmoon

My niece at age 26 passed away at around 6:45 am today. She had to go back to the hospital a few days ago and her organs were basically shutting down on her, the hospital allowed her to go to her step-dad's home where she spent her last hours. Her mom passed away at an early age as well, at age 36. Both of them fought heart problems since birth and this was unfortunately one battle Kassie wasn't able to overcome.


----------



## Surlysomething

willowmoon said:


> My niece at age 26 passed away at around 6:45 am today. She had to go back to the hospital a few days ago and her organs were basically shutting down on her, the hospital allowed her to go to her step-dad's home where she spent her last hours. Her mom passed away at an early age as well, at age 36. Both of them fought heart problems since birth and this was unfortunately one battle Kassie wasn't able to overcome.



I'm so very sorry to hear she passed. 

Big hugs your way.


----------



## CastingPearls

willowmoon said:


> My niece at age 26 passed away at around 6:45 am today. She had to go back to the hospital a few days ago and her organs were basically shutting down on her, the hospital allowed her to go to her step-dad's home where she spent her last hours. Her mom passed away at an early age as well, at age 36. Both of them fought heart problems since birth and this was unfortunately one battle Kassie wasn't able to overcome.


I'm very sorry about your niece. My condolences to your family.


----------



## curlyrachel

willowmoon said:


> My niece at age 26 passed away at around 6:45 am today. She had to go back to the hospital a few days ago and her organs were basically shutting down on her, the hospital allowed her to go to her step-dad's home where she spent her last hours. Her mom passed away at an early age as well, at age 36. Both of them fought heart problems since birth and this was unfortunately one battle Kassie wasn't able to overcome.



i am so sorry for your loss.


----------



## penguin

I'm sending out good thoughts and hugs to those who need them now.


----------



## Ruffie

Just sending love and light to everyone right now who needs it!


----------



## Your Plump Princess

Sending positive thoughts and lots of hugs to all of you who are going through such rough times, this month isn't even half over and it's already terrible, here's hoping the rest of this year goes a hell of a lot smoother for everybody.


----------



## spiritangel

Lots and lots and lots of squishy hugs, sending lots of loving energy your way. So much sadness 

and some new Angels.

Big hugs to all going through hard times.


----------



## imfree

willowmoon said:


> My niece at age 26 passed away at around 6:45 am today. She had to go back to the hospital a few days ago and her organs were basically shutting down on her, the hospital allowed her to go to her step-dad's home where she spent her last hours. Her mom passed away at an early age as well, at age 36. Both of them fought heart problems since birth and this was unfortunately one battle Kassie wasn't able to overcome.



My condolences, my healing wishes and prayers go out to you and the families.


----------



## HottiMegan

Your Plump Princess said:


> My stepmom passed away in her sleep sometime last night, my dad woke up and found her next to him this morning.
> 
> I watched my 9 year old brother, I watched another piece of his heart just shatter. I don't know how much I will be online due to all of this, either, we won't know a lot of things until tomorrow at best. Everyone is still in shock, my dad refuses to show his true emotion until my brother goes to bed. I'm on no sleep because I had JUST dozed off when my dad came to my door this morning to tell me he was calling 911 again..
> 
> ughn. I'm.. honestly mostly sad _for_ my brother and dad, they were closer to her than I was. But I was just talking to her last night, before she went to bed at like midnight. We were just laughing and having a good time.. and the next time I see her, she's .. blue



I'm really sorry you're going through this loss. I only just read it.. been wrapped up in my own life. I hope you can get through tomorrow okay. You guys are in my thoughts.


----------



## HottiMegan

willowmoon said:


> My niece at age 26 passed away at around 6:45 am today. She had to go back to the hospital a few days ago and her organs were basically shutting down on her, the hospital allowed her to go to her step-dad's home where she spent her last hours. Her mom passed away at an early age as well, at age 36. Both of them fought heart problems since birth and this was unfortunately one battle Kassie wasn't able to overcome.



I'm sorry for your loss.


----------



## balletguy

willowmoon said:


> My niece at age 26 passed away at around 6:45 am today. She had to go back to the hospital a few days ago and her organs were basically shutting down on her, the hospital allowed her to go to her step-dad's home where she spent her last hours. Her mom passed away at an early age as well, at age 36. Both of them fought heart problems since birth and this was unfortunately one battle Kassie wasn't able to overcome.



Wow I am sooo sorry. My thought r with you


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

willowmoon said:


> My niece at age 26 passed away at around 6:45 am today. She had to go back to the hospital a few days ago and her organs were basically shutting down on her, the hospital allowed her to go to her step-dad's home where she spent her last hours. Her mom passed away at an early age as well, at age 36. Both of them fought heart problems since birth and this was unfortunately one battle Kassie wasn't able to overcome.


I'm so sorry for your family's loss.


----------



## one2one

We just found out my mom has cancer.


----------



## bigpapi4u

Yesterday was the conclusion of a toxic relationship im sad because i won't be around my kids like i used to but is better for my heart.now to find someone that will love me for who i am and not for how i look  

don't let pople take you for granted please never


----------



## Linda

bigpapi4u said:


> Yesterday was the conclusion of a toxic relationship im sad because i won't be around my kids like i used to but is better for my heart.now to find someone that will love me for who i am and not for how i look
> 
> don't let pople take you for granted please never




(((( Hugs )))) 

That's rough and hopefully now you can find someone who appreciates the you that you are.

How is your grandmother?


----------



## bigpapi4u

Linda said:


> (((( Hugs ))))
> 
> That's rough and hopefully now you can find someone who appreciates the you that you are.
> 
> How is your grandmother?



Thank you Linda she's still at the hospital but she's feeling better maybe in two days they let her go home


----------



## Linda

bigpapi4u said:


> Thank you Linda she's still at the hospital but she's feeling better maybe in two days they let her go home



Yay!! That is good news indeed. I will keep her in my prayers.


----------



## CastingPearls

one2one said:


> We just found out my mom has cancer.



I'm so sorry. I hope that she's able to battle and conquer. Best wishes.



bigpapi4u said:


> Yesterday was the conclusion of a toxic relationship im sad because i won't be around my kids like i used to but is better for my heart.now to find someone that will love me for who i am and not for how i look
> 
> *don't let people take you for granted please never*



It's tough when a relationship ends and even tougher when kids are involved. Thankfully, I didn't have any with my ex. Your *bolded* sentence: Amen brother. Truth. Never ever ever.





bigpapi4u said:


> Thank you Linda she's still at the hospital but she's feeling better maybe in two days they let her go home



Was just thinking of your grandma. Glad to hear she's feeling better.


----------



## Kamily

I saw an old friend tonight. He has been living several hours away with family members while he is battling brain cancer. I had talked to him on the phone but hadnt seen him in 6 months and it brought tears to my eyes when I saw him. He is now really weak, thin and walking with a cane. I sat and talked to him for a couple hours. This has broke my heart. He is a very active person and Im hoping he gets better, regains his strength and can get back to a normal life.


----------



## one2one

CastingPearls said:


> I'm so sorry. I hope that she's able to battle and conquer. Best wishes.



Thank you. That is so kind, and I really appreciate it.


----------



## mimosa

*I try so hard to be strong. I do my best to self-reliant and be happy. But some days the pain comes back and my heart breaks a little each time. :really sad:

On days like this, I need this comforting song: 

http://youtu.be/1HRa4X07jdE

*


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

one2one said:


> We just found out my mom has cancer.



How incredibly hard on your family, and on you.  ((((one2one)))) As CP said, I hope your mom battles it into remission.


----------



## bigpapi4u

thank you for your prayers my grandma is at home she is still sick but much better.her diabetis is making the healing process much slower


----------



## Linda

bigpapi4u said:


> thank you for your prayers my grandma is at home she is still sick but much better.her diabetis is making the healing process much slower



Well I am glad she went home. She will more than likely get a lot more rest there. Love on her lots.


----------



## TwilightStarr

My 3 year old nephew who has been staying here for the past 3 weeks went home today 

I know he is right down the street and I will probably see him tomorrow but I got use to him being here all the time and I miss the little booger!


----------



## ScreamingChicken

Got a damn speeding ticket tonight on the way from work to my mid week visit. Still showed up an hour late.


----------



## BBWbonnie

That I really love someone I can't be with and we will never talk again


----------



## one2one

BigBeautifulMe said:


> How incredibly hard on your family, and on you.  ((((one2one)))) As CP said, I hope your mom battles it into remission.



Thanks for being so sweet. I loved the hug; it really helps. She spoke with the surgeon yesterday and will probably go that direction instead of chemo or radiation, maybe in as little as two weeks. If they can get everything, she may be out of the woods soon.


----------



## spiritangel

That yet again I am shut out of an important event without thought for how hurt or upset it would make me

Shaylyn is having a sweet 16 dinner out and due to family crap (we are adults it can be pushed aside for one night grrrrrrr) I am not invited because her great Grandmother and the woman who raised my sister (is her grandmother but my sis calls her mum) is going and she hates me not been told why, but I feel suckerpunched when I see her (not the point)

to add insult to injury one of my exes who is still friends with my sister will be there

but I wont be. I know other people have far greater sadness, Shaylyn is like my own Daughter I have spent a lot of time helping to raise her and it hurts that I am the only person in the family who will not be at this dinner.

The bbq has also been moved to another friend of theirs place which I did not know so had not budgeted the extra for taxi fares so now also have to try and find money to get to the bbq thing. 

I will get over it. 

Shaylyn at least loved her bear and at least in some way she will have a piece of me with her


----------



## Micara

My cousin posted on her Facebook that she saw on TV that most kids said they would rather lose an arm than be fat, and that she agrees with them. I cannot fathom such idiocy. I told her fine, have fun with her one arm, and don't ask me to help her make a sandwich or carry in her groceries.


----------



## spiritangel

Micara said:


> My cousin posted on her Facebook that she saw on TV that most kids said they would rather lose an arm than be fat, and that she agrees with them. I cannot fathom such idiocy. I told her fine, have fun with her one arm, and don't ask me to help her make a sandwich or carry in her groceries.



Wow that is scary to me, I think the JK Rowling Quote says it best Is 'fat' really the worst thing a human being can be? Is 'fat' worse than 'vindictive', 'jealous', 'shallow', 'vain', 'boring' or 'cruel'? Not to me.


----------



## Surlysomething

I feel super-crazy emotional today. It's bullshit.

Stupid girl.


----------



## Mathias

I broke down crying when the seniors in our choir class began learning the song we all have to sing at Graduation. This cannot be real...


----------



## Surlysomething

I'm so, so, SOOOOO tired of asking for the same thing over and over.
The ignoring is just about done in my book.

I can only be pushed so far and then i'm DONE.


It's so sad that it has to come to this.


----------



## Mathias

A car ran into me when I was on my way back to my dorm last night. I wasn't thrown out of my powerchair and it didn't tip over, thank God, but I'm still a little shaken up by it. :really sad:


----------



## Surlysomething

Mathias said:


> A car ran into me when I was on my way back to my dorm last night. I wasn't thrown out of my powerchair and it didn't tip over, thank God, but I'm still a little shaken up by it. :really sad:


 
That sucks. I'm glad you didn't get hurt though!


----------



## moore2me

Mathias said:


> A car ran into me when I was on my way back to my dorm last night. I wasn't thrown out of my powerchair and it didn't tip over, thank God, but I'm still a little shaken up by it. :really sad:



Mathias, I hope you continue to be okay. Sometimes with an accident, we don't feel damage until hours or days later. Now, the hard part - accident analysis and corrective actions. This is necessary for your continued safety and the safety of other folks like yourself who have limited mobility on campus.

*Here are some things to look into - the goal is to help stop future accidents.*
What caused the car to hit you? (Was the driver drunk, texting, eating, old, etc.)
What were the conditions on the road? (dark, paved, streetlights, sidewalks, posted speed signs, etc.)
Were the police called? Get a copy of the report. What did they say caused the accident?

What was the driver's name and license number and type of car? Did the driver have a bad record?
Were you driving your powerchair unsafely? (eating, drinking, listening to MP3, etc.)

Do you need more lights on your chair? More reflective tape? Was your clothing reflective?


----------



## JerseyGirl07093

Mathias said:


> A car ran into me when I was on my way back to my dorm last night. I wasn't thrown out of my powerchair and it didn't tip over, thank God, but I'm still a little shaken up by it. :really sad:



Oh my God Matt I'm glad you're okay! The mother in me is all worried right now, I know if I was your mom I would have a heart attack if this happened to my 'baby'. Make sure you take care of yourself and watch for signs of injury that don't show up right away like moore2me said. 
What happened with the driver? Was he punished? How the heck did he hit you?

I'm just glad you're okay!


----------



## thatgirl08

My break up with D is making me sad. It's been two weeks and I find myself grieving more at this point than I was before. I miss him so desperately and painfully. I was woken out of a dead sleep last night with a memory of him. I haven't cried yet.. maybe that's what I need.. maybe I need to stop putting on this brave face to everyone and acting like I don't care when I care so much it's consuming me. People don't understand.. how could I be sad when I was the one to officially end it? I ended it because I knew it was toxic.. but I still grieve for the loss because he was so important to me. I just wish he could've been different in some ways.. I just wish we could've made it work. I don't want to let it go, but I know I have to.


----------



## Mathias

moore2me said:


> Mathias, I hope you continue to be okay. Sometimes with an accident, we don't feel damage until hours or days later. Now, the hard part - accident analysis and corrective actions. This is necessary for your continued safety and the safety of other folks like yourself who have limited mobility on campus.
> 
> *Here are some things to look into - the goal is to help stop future accidents.*
> What caused the car to hit you? (Was the driver drunk, texting, eating, old, etc.)
> What were the conditions on the road? (dark, paved, streetlights, sidewalks, posted speed signs, etc.)
> Were the police called? Get a copy of the report. What did they say caused the accident?
> 
> What was the driver's name and license number and type of car? Did the driver have a bad record?
> Were you driving your powerchair unsafely? (eating, drinking, listening to MP3, etc.)
> 
> Do you need more lights on your chair? More reflective tape? Was your clothing reflective?







JerseyGirl07093 said:


> Oh my God Matt I'm glad you're okay! The mother in me is all worried right now, I know if I was your mom I would have a heart attack if this happened to my 'baby'. Make sure you take care of yourself and watch for signs of injury that don't show up right away like moore2me said.
> What happened with the driver? Was he punished? How the heck did he hit you?
> 
> I'm just glad you're okay!



I was wearing dark clothes but I do have reflectors on my chair, but she only looked one way before pulling out. Had she looked both ways, she'd have saw me. She gave me all of her info and was cooperative.


----------



## Deven

I went from a 70% to a 50% in a class that I have no idea how it dropped so hard... so, I'm officially in Financial Aid Warning... awesome...


----------



## CastingPearls

Mathias said:


> A car ran into me when I was on my way back to my dorm last night. I wasn't thrown out of my powerchair and it didn't tip over, thank God, but I'm still a little shaken up by it. :really sad:


Thank goodness you're safe. Hugs, sweetie.


----------



## moore2me

Mathias said:


> I was wearing dark clothes but I do have reflectors on my chair, but she only looked one way before pulling out. Had she looked both ways, she'd have saw me. She gave me all of her info and was cooperative.



If the police or campus security were not called, then you and the driver may be required to fill out a state of PA accident report. (You also might check and see if campus security will do this for you.) The following info is quoted from their website:

The applicable state requirement is here
http://www.dmv.state.pa.us/pdotforms/dl_forms/aa-600.pdf

*COMMONWEALTH OF PENNSYLVANIA - Drivers Accident Report

*This Form is to be completed only in the event that the accident was not investigated by a policy agency.

The Drivers Accident Report Form is required to be completed by ALL drivers involved in motor vehicle traffic accidents occurring within the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania and involves:

(1) * injury *to or death *of any person*; or

(2) damage to any vehicle involved to the extent that it cannot be driven under its own power in its customary manner without further damage or hazard to the vehicle, other traffic elements, or the roadway, and therefore requires towing.

Section 3747(a) of Title 75, Pennsylvania Consolidated Statutes of the Vehicle Code requires that if a police officer does not investigate an accident required to be Investigated by section 3746 (relating to immediate notice of accident to police department), the driver of a vehicle which is in any manner involved in the accident shall, within five days of the accident, forward a written report of the accident to the department.

A Form, supplied by the Department of Transportation, has been designed for this purpose. That Form is the attached AA-600, Commonwealth of Pennsylvania Drivers Accident Report. The primary objective of this Form is to obtain information which can be used to develop accident prevention and reduction programs aimed at reducing accidents and accident losses. In order for these programs to succeed, every attempt must be made to obtain the information for all items listed on the Report Form. Compliance with the following instructions will help to assure that the Report is filled out completely and accurately.

A copy of the completed Accident Report should be retained for your records. If copies are requested from the Department of Transportation, a fee of $5.00 per copy will be required to cover our processing costs.

Please send completed Forms to the following address:

Pennsylvania Department of Transportation
Bureau of Highway Safety and Traffic Engineering
P.O. Box 2047
Harrisburg, Pennsylvania 17105-2047


----------



## Mathias

moore2me said:


> If the police or campus security were not called, then you and the driver may be required to fill out a state of PA accident report. (You also might check and see if campus security will do this for you.) The following info is quoted from their website:
> 
> The applicable state requirement is here
> http://www.dmv.state.pa.us/pdotforms/dl_forms/aa-600.pdf
> 
> *COMMONWEALTH OF PENNSYLVANIA - Drivers Accident Report
> 
> *This Form is to be completed only in the event that the accident was not investigated by a policy agency.
> 
> The Drivers Accident Report Form is required to be completed by ALL drivers involved in motor vehicle traffic accidents occurring within the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania and involves:
> 
> (1) * injury *to or death *of any person*; or
> 
> (2) damage to any vehicle involved to the extent that it cannot be driven under its own power in its customary manner without further damage or hazard to the vehicle, other traffic elements, or the roadway, and therefore requires towing.
> 
> Section 3747(a) of Title 75, Pennsylvania Consolidated Statutes of the Vehicle Code requires that if a police officer does not investigate an accident required to be Investigated by section 3746 (relating to immediate notice of accident to police department), the driver of a vehicle which is in any manner involved in the accident shall, within five days of the accident, forward a written report of the accident to the department.
> 
> A Form, supplied by the Department of Transportation, has been designed for this purpose. That Form is the attached AA-600, Commonwealth of Pennsylvania Drivers Accident Report. The primary objective of this Form is to obtain information which can be used to develop accident prevention and reduction programs aimed at reducing accidents and accident losses. In order for these programs to succeed, every attempt must be made to obtain the information for all items listed on the Report Form. Compliance with the following instructions will help to assure that the Report is filled out completely and accurately.
> 
> A copy of the completed Accident Report should be retained for your records. If copies are requested from the Department of Transportation, a fee of $5.00 per copy will be required to cover our processing costs.
> 
> Please send completed Forms to the following address:
> 
> Pennsylvania Department of Transportation
> Bureau of Highway Safety and Traffic Engineering
> P.O. Box 2047
> Harrisburg, Pennsylvania 17105-2047



My campus's securoty was called and reports were given.


----------



## Filly

The fact that I'm drunk, alone, and empty. Plus the lack of environmental concern and general apathy towards conservation


----------



## Mishty

I'm just not feelin' it anymore.
It's just pointless.......


----------



## NewfieGal

My week off is over and back to the night shift this weekend although its nurses week here in Canada so happy nurses week


----------



## penguin

Things out of my control that I can't change.


----------



## BBWbonnie

That I still can't get him out of my head and atm no one can even compare to him


----------



## penguin

I have never felt so alone in my life.


----------



## Webmaster

penguin said:


> I have never felt so alone in my life.



In my experience, there's a distinct difference between the times we want to be alone or left alone, and the times we need people in our lives. Both feeling crowded and feeling alone can be hard. I hope you feel more in touch with whoever you want to feel in touch with real soon.


----------



## HottiMegan

Being a vegetarian in this meat-centric world is hard on a kid. Max is totally upset that his class is having a pizza party and not even one cheese pizza is being ordered. So he feels so down in the dumps because he feels so alone. I baked him a frozen pizza to take with him but he still feels alone. that makes me sad that the class wouldn't consider ordering a cheese pizza. Not every 3rd grader likes meat pizza! If i had a car and knew when the party was, i'd bring max his favorite pizza all for himself.


----------



## sugar and spice

Aww that is mean, they ought to have a cheese pizza option and you're right most kids I know will only eat cheese pizza.


----------



## CAMellie

I'm so lonely I can't see straight. My husband works full time, is finishing up his degree with online classes, and then just wants to relax with his video games when he has any spare time.
My sister moved in with us so I thought I would have _her_ company, but she's always gone (with people she bitches incessantly about because of the way they supposedly treat her) or sleeping in her room.
My husband occasionally heads off with his family to help them with something and my sister enjoys going thrift-store shopping - but every time I ask if I can come they use my anxiety disorder as an excuse for me not to come.
I sit in this apartment visiting the same websites over and over again or flip through the television stations hoping to come across something I haven't seen before.


----------



## TwilightStarr

I forgot all about knocking my head on the pointy corner of my dresser earlier until just now when I went to scratch my head and it hurt like hell


----------



## HottiMegan

Max got slugged in the stomach yesterday. He has a bruise and tenderness. It broke my heart to send him to school today. He tried everything to stay home today. I hate that he's suffering.


----------



## Gingembre

BigCutieBonnie said:


> That I still can't get him out of my head and atm no one can even compare to him



I got this one. It suuuuuucks.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

My boyfriend won't be here the first date we planned on. 

Or the second.


I keep fighting the urge to get excited because I _am_ buuut a lot of things are up the air right now so I can't let me be. Not just yet.


----------



## Diana_Prince245

One of my clients made me cry for the third visit in a row. She's very mean to her caregivers. I tried to talk to her about, making sure to use 'I' statements and everything, but she insisted I hadn't seen her be unpleasant yet. I called the office and said she needed another CNA, but she really needs to understand that if she isn't nice to the caregivers, pretty soon she won't have any.


----------



## moore2me

Diana_Prince245 said:


> One of my clients made me cry for the third visit in a row. She's very mean to her caregivers. I tried to talk to her about, making sure to use 'I' statements and everything, but she insisted I hadn't seen her be unpleasant yet. I called the office and said she needed another CNA, but she really needs to understand that if she isn't nice to the caregivers, pretty soon she won't have any.



Diana, 
I understand about how discouraging and unpleasant some curmudgeons can be. You didn't say if the client was elderly or not, but having mood problems, including swearing, cussing, and even racial slurs can be symptoms of some geriatric diseases. This includes Alzheimer's, dementia, brain damage from strokes and brain changes due to tumors and hardening of the arteries. 

If you are a CNA, you already have training on how to handle the physical symptoms of diseases such as diabetes or lung & breathing problems. Often the patient has very little control over mood swings, anger, despair, anti-social behaviors, or name calling and using foul language. This client may not be doing these things because she is bad, rude, or mean. She may have an organic disease of the brain or suffering from depression and anxiety. The caregivers of such patients should not take these acts personally or consider them attacks from rude behavior - anymore than we would take consider diabetics bad because their blood sugars went haywire. 

One measure of such mechanholy and despair among the elderly is that this group can have elevated suicide risks and death seeking behaviors (not eating, not taking medication, etc.). Some other older folks are suffering from pain and loss of body functions wnhich also makes them angry. A health care professional should not let such a client "run them off" or give into the patient when they are mean & hateful and want to be left alone. It is similar to an drug addict undergoing treatment swearing at CNAs and telling them to go away (or go to hell) and stop ruining their lives (or stopping them from getting high on drugs). Sometimes these clients need antidepressants, therapy, anxiety drugs or just talking with a trusted advisor regularly (like a minister, good friend, son or daughter, etc.) or a dog or cat to love them.





HottiMegan said:


> Max got slugged in the stomach yesterday. He has a bruise and tenderness. It broke my heart to send him to school today. He tried everything to stay home today. I hate that he's suffering.



Dear HottiMegan, Poor little Max - I hope he is doing better. What you described may be a case of Max getting bullied at school. There is a big drive nowadays to reduce school bullying and every school should have a no tolerance policy. You should talk to powers at be at his school to make sure this thing doesn't escalate and get worse. Bullying can have bad consequences for the child being tortured.

Also, you might check and make sure he doesn't have spleen or kidney damage from a blow to his stomach. Slight damages to these organs can have long term effects. If there is no school nurse available, someone (doctor or clinic) might need to check him for spleen or kidney damage.


----------



## Diana_Prince245

No, she's not elderly. She's just an unpleasant person with a chronic, degenerative disease that does not cause dementia. I'm sure she's frustrated and is taking it out on us instead of her family, but I don't make nearly enough to leave in tears every day. It'd be different if she was in some sort of facility where you could leave her room after 20-30 minutes, but I'm trapped with her in her home for two hours at a time. 

I love my job, but I have limits, especially when she tells me I'm too stupid to be a nurse when I'm among the top nursing students at my school.


----------



## Linda

I am sad because I have a friend who doesn't see just how awesome he is. He has let the world kick him over and over until he started to believe he was worthless yet he is amazing. Hurts my heart the world is so cruel and can break a person's spirit and just move on as if it was their God given right.


----------



## Lovelyone

My family...which isn't really a family anymore.


----------



## HottiMegan

I'm sad that Max is slightly obsessed with avoiding the boy who punched him. I feel for him, being afraid to do normal kid stuff just in case the kid is around. I'm sure it's bad parenting but we gave him permission to hit back. We were hesitant because of his martial arts training. He packs a whollop with his hits. I'm grateful that he has other friends and that the boy is moving.


----------



## cinnamitch

HottiMegan said:


> I'm sad that Max is slightly obsessed with avoiding the boy who punched him. I feel for him, being afraid to do normal kid stuff just in case the kid is around. I'm sure it's bad parenting but we gave him permission to hit back. We were hesitant because of his martial arts training. He packs a whollop with his hits. I'm grateful that he has other friends and that the boy is moving.



You know that is one thing we always gave our kids permission to do. If they were attacked first, they had our permission to fight back, even if it got them suspended for 3 days. It didn't make them into fighting monsters, but it did keep them from being physically attacked more than one time. Also their attackers realized if you fought one, you fought all of them. My two oldest girls were very protective of their younger brothers.


----------



## CastingPearls

HottiMegan said:


> I'm sad that Max is slightly obsessed with avoiding the boy who punched him. I feel for him, being afraid to do normal kid stuff just in case the kid is around. I'm sure it's bad parenting but we gave him permission to hit back. We were hesitant because of his martial arts training. He packs a whollop with his hits. I'm grateful that he has other friends and that the boy is moving.


I'm sure you've also taught him to try to reason with someone first. It's not at all bad parenting to tell him he's allowed to defend himself when all else fails.


----------



## Blackjack

Homesickness.

I got it really bad right now.


----------



## Weirdo890

Feeling overwhelmed by school projects, as well as feeling inferior to my classmates, in terms of academics.


----------



## Linda

Not being able to be there for someone who is having surgery today.


----------



## BBWbonnie

That I wish I has hargen daaz ice cream and pizza huuuuuuuuuuuuuuut!


----------



## CAMellie

I'm sad that my sissy had to give the puppy she found to the SPCA because it has sarcoptic mange and she couldn't afford to treat him. Luckily, the SPCA said he's very treatable and will be HIGHLY adoptable because he's just so adorable and tiny.


----------



## moore2me

Weirdo890 said:


> Feeling overwhelmed by school projects, as well as feeling inferior to my classmates, in terms of academics.



Dear Weirdo, I have some experience teaching school (junior high, high school and college). When you talk about being inferior to your classmates in terms of academics, you need to keep in mind that students have different abilities depending on their "gifts, drive, inspiration, as well as intelligence." Some kids are blessed with high IQs, some as blessed with great artistic abilities, others have the gift of leadershp, or the gifts of athletic ability. Some kids are healers, some with people, some with animals, some kids grow up to raise children or be chefs or writers.

It's not just a person's command of academics that will define you as a success. There are many people that are average or below average in academics. (Personally, my maths skills and language skills have been so bad they nearly made me fail grades at times when I was a student.) If you think you are inferior to your classmates, it may be you are in the wrong class. (Such as being in a class learning French versus a class learning Debate.)

But don't worry - about being inferior. Once you find your niche, more than likely others will be inferior to you. The trick in life is finding a way to make money doing what you're good at. (Or, if necessary make money in a make-do job and use your leisure time dong what you excell at.

As to being overwhelmed by school projects, that may take budgeting a whole bunch of time to complete these projects (for example 6 hours instead of 3 hours). Some tasks I am not good at I need a bunch of time to do them and it needs to be quality time (not tired, not distracted, not trying to listen to music or TV while working on project).

I hope this helps. M2M


----------



## Your Plump Princess

I.. I just don't know how to deal with my brother anymore.


----------



## TwilightStarr

That my low potassium causing my legs to be weak and this horrible head cold I have stopped me from going to The Starlight Strawberry Festival today


----------



## Surlysomething

It breaks my heart.


Over
and

over...


----------



## Victoria08

Your Plump Princess said:


> I.. I just don't know how to deal with my brother anymore.



I hear ya, girl. My brother is just...god, the shit that comes out if his mouth is just ridiculous. Since he's been dating this girl he has just turned into a complete douche. I can't stand it.


----------



## CAMellie

My mental health issues...or rather the meds I was prescribed for said issues...has forced me to cancel our trip to the county fair for my sister's birthday today.


----------



## Mathias

I'm too nice for my own good. People just walk all over me...


----------



## moore2me

Mathias said:


> I'm too nice for my own good. People just walk all over me...



Mathias, There is absolutely nothing wrong with being nice, or polite, or treating people with respect. However, you should also treat yourself with respect and not tolerate bad behavior or abuse in others. You have the power inside to be a strong man and stand as a example for others (especially younger men) to follow. Make a set of internal rules for your life and don't bend the rules because you think others will like you better if you cave into what they want. Think of some strong men or leaders you respect and pattern your life after their model.


----------



## seavixen

Dealing with the "nothing can be done" diagnosis. Freaking out over what seeing my dad's going to be like next month. Knowing that he's going to be so drastically different from the way he was when I last saw him - less than a year ago.

I have a beef with mortality right now, and keeping a positive attitude for his benefit is tough as hell over the phone. I'm not really sure how I'm going to do it in person. I've done it before. But it wasn't my dad.

That changes things.


----------



## Micara

Not sad, just disappointed when you think you know someone, but then they do things that have you questioning if you really knew them at all.


----------



## Surlysomething

It's a different kind of hurt this time.

I feel so very disappointed and a little sick about it all. Mostly at myself for being so open, trusting and loving -without reservation, finally. It's like the floor dropped out from underneath me...
I've caught myself making that choking, caught in the throat sound and it catches me off guard. A wounded animal...

I think this hurt is imprinted on each cell in my body. Stamped. Branded.

What kind of fool am I...


----------



## BrownEyedChica

The fact that you can not turn back the hands of time to do things differently.


----------



## Lovelyone

The anniversary of my dad passing away has distressed me. I don't understand why though...cos he passed away 13 years ago and I don't usually get so overly emotional on this anniversary.


----------



## succubus_dxb

I welcomed in my birthday sitting alone at the end of the bar I work at, on the fritz with my boyfriend, with no idea where my life's going in the next couple of months. Good times.


----------



## littlefairywren

succubus_dxb said:


> I welcomed in my birthday sitting alone at the end of the bar I work at, on the fritz with my boyfriend, with no idea where my life's going in the next couple of months. Good times.



Soft hugs, honey.


----------



## Surlysomething

Getting to work this morning after driving in the pouring rain and then finding out one of your co-worker's son was in a car accident last night and lost a leg.

 My heart is so heavy for her.


----------



## Mathias

Having a horrific nightmare about me having to have another surgery wasn't how I was expecting to start my day.


----------



## CastingPearls

Very late last night on my way home from a friend's house I got stuck in really bad traffic and it turned out to be the worst accident I'd ever seen. A tractor trailer was on its side across all the lanes of I80 (thank goodness for the shoulder for emergency people to get in) and it had flattened a Smartcar and another vehicle which was unrecognizable. Some didn't survive the accident at the scene they were covering up bodies...it was horrible and all I could think to do was pray for their families and for the safety of the EMTs/troopers/firemen attending to the scene.


----------



## Jeeshcristina

CastingPearls said:


> Very late last night on my way home from a friend's house I got stuck in really bad traffic and it turned out to be the worst accident I'd ever seen. A tractor trailer was on its side across all the lanes of I80 (thank goodness for the shoulder for emergency people to get in) and it had flattened a Smartcar and another vehicle which was unrecognizable. Some didn't survive the accident at the scene they were covering up bodies...it was horrible and all I could think to do was pray for their families and for the safety of the EMTs/troopers/firemen attending to the scene.



It really makes you stop and think whenever you see accidents like that. It's horrible, I know I've been stuck in traffic before, complaining...only to see a terrible scene where people didn't survive, and suddenly I feel quite stupid for worrying about being 10 minutes late. It makes you realize the scarcity and preciousness of life.


----------



## Surlysomething

I started to write you a message right now describing how hurt I felt that you haven't contacted me regarding my injury but I said "fuck it, what's the point"

That makes me sad.


----------



## CastingPearls

Surlysomething said:


> I started to write you a message right now describing how hurt I felt that you haven't contacted me regarding my injury but I said "fuck it, what's the point"
> 
> That makes me sad.


I heard you pulled a 'Swan Lake' when you did it. Way to go! Seriously, I hope the swelling is going down. Hugs (soft ones, far far away from your injury)


----------



## ClashCityRocker

the memory of my dog Ginger and her untimely (and unfair) departure from mine and my fam's lives.


----------



## Surlysomething

CastingPearls said:


> I heard you pulled a 'Swan Lake' when you did it. Way to go! Seriously, I hope the swelling is going down. Hugs (soft ones, far far away from your injury)



Haha. No Swan Lake here, more like the thump of a ton of bricks. I feel MUCH better than yesterday and this morning. I even went to work for 5 hours this afternoon and got a lot done. It's surprising how resilient your body can be (+ ice + T3's).


And thanks, Lainey. :happy:


----------



## moore2me

SurlySomething, Whoa girlee - I had no idea that you feel and hurt yourself too! In my haze of what's gone on since last Friday, I did not catch this piece of news. I am sorry to hear that you were hurt. I can truly say that this is a bitch. I heard you fell on a patch of ice and hit the ground hard. I hope you are doing okay (as best you can when hard contact with concrete is involved). I feel your pain. Get well soon. M2M :doh::doh:


----------



## Surlysomething

moore2me said:


> SurlySomething, Whoa girlee - I had no idea that you feel and hurt yourself too! In my haze of what's gone on since last Friday, I did not catch this piece of news. I am sorry to hear that you were hurt. I can truly say that this is a bitch. I heard you fell on a patch of ice and hit the ground hard. I hope you are doing okay (as best you can when hard contact with concrete is involved). I feel your pain. Get well soon. M2M :doh::doh:


 
Thanks, M2M. I actually rolled it in the office. I didn't do anything out of the ordinary, it just gave out and down I went.


----------



## Diana_Prince245

I hope you ladies heal up quick. Hurting ankles are absolutely no fun.


----------



## moore2me

Diana_Prince245 said:


> I hope you ladies heal up quick. Hurting ankles are absolutely no fun.



Can she get an Amen?


*Amen! * *  Amen!

 **   Amen!  *  * Amen!* * Amen!*


----------



## Deven

My wedding is off until we can afford to make up what I'd lose in student loans if we married.


----------



## Victoria08

A missed opportunity on my vacation. I didn't realize he was flirting :doh: It's sad, but my first instinct was that he was looking at me and mocking my size. Oh, how the years of bullying never leave you..


----------



## Mishty

Just shit in general I don't want to deal with,I'm a Scorpio though so I'm great at just movin' on and lettin' the cookie crumble.


----------



## penguin

I was awake for two hours in the middle of the night, so I'm tired and my mood has bottomed out. Lack of sleep brings on depressive tendencies, so today I just want to ignore the world while I mope.


----------



## HottiMegan

It's small and insignificant but I'm sad that I found a scratch on my new tablet. The toughness of gorilla glass is crap. I feel so bad about not taking good enough care of it.  I thought I was doing ok with it. I ordered some screen protectors and a better case for it.


----------



## CleverBomb

Surlysomething said:


> Haha. No Swan Lake here, more like the thump of a ton of bricks. I feel MUCH better than yesterday and this morning. I even went to work for 5 hours this afternoon and got a lot done. It's surprising how resilient your body can be (+ ice + T3's).
> 
> 
> And thanks, Lainey. :happy:


Sorry to find you've been injured; glad you're healing. Keep it up (the healing part, not the getting injured!)

Leg injuries suck.

-Rusty


----------



## Jeeshcristina

Victoria08 said:


> A missed opportunity on my vacation. I didn't realize he was flirting :doh: It's sad, but my first instinct was that he was looking at me and mocking my size. Oh, how the years of bullying never leave you..



 

If there is one good thing about getting older, it's that the mocking generally decreases as the age increases. Still, getting past those old feelings of inadequacy is a tough thing to do.


----------



## Kamily

I discovered that someone that I cared about for a long time betrayed my trust. Apparently this had been going on for quite some time.  It takes alot for me to trust people and let them in and this happens. 

Im feeling pretty low and disgusted at the moment.


----------



## Wheels and the Legman

I'm sad because I have realized that people cannot look past the physical status for a romantic relationship.


----------



## kaylaisamachine

I head back to California on Thursday. I'm in Michigan right now. The last time I visited, I stayed with my aunt and uncle, my cousin and her daughter. It was my first time meeting her daughter since I moved because she was pregnant when I left and when I came back, her daughter was one. She was so adorable, didn't expect her to remember me the next time I visited obviously. Three years later, I came back and she is 4 now, talking up a storm and adores me as much as I adore her. This is our conversation when I told her today would be my last day with her because I'm going to Cedar Point tomorrow and then on Thursday, she'll be at her grandma's house.

Me: "Shannon, tomorrow is my last day with you." Shannon: "You're going home?" Me: "Yeah. Going back to California." Shannon: "Can't you stay with me and momma?" Me: "No, I wish, but no." Shannon: "Why? You can just go visit your parents and then come back and stay with me and mom." 

I just about started crying. She's so cute. I'm going to miss her sooooo much. I've always loved kids, but this little girl has become my world for the past month that I've been here. It's going to be so hard to say goodbye tonight.


----------



## CastingPearls

My ex is suing me to not have to pay alimony because he's claiming unemployment, which he will have to prove. Unfortunately, he's a member of a "Let's Screw Over the Ex-Wives Club' and is the third of them to use this tactic to get out of child support and alimony. 

I'm more concerned about the insurance I may lose if he wins. I have to appear at a hearing on July 2nd. There will be no judge, but an administrator who will just look at paperwork and make a decision. I also know the weasel's best/boy friend is good at faking documents and it makes me sad that he would stoop so low as to put our house in foreclosure rather than agree to sell it or even have it appraised just to screw me over. He's hurting himself financially just to hurt me. It's bad enough he rejected me and drove me away but to conspire so that I can't even have insurance is beneath contempt. 

I never thought he would be capable of such hateful things. I was a good wife to him until he became controlling and abusive. Now that I see what he's truly capable of, I'm worried that he might not be taking care of Nacho as I once thought he would, as the honorable thing. He has no honor. I don't know this man. He's a stranger to me.


----------



## AuntHen

CastingPearls said:


> My ex is suing me to not have to pay alimony because he's claiming unemployment, which he will have to prove. Unfortunately, he's a member of a "Let's Screw Over the Ex-Wives Club' and is the third of them to use this tactic to get out of child support and alimony.
> 
> I'm more concerned about the insurance I may lose if he wins. I have to appear at a hearing on July 2nd. There will be no judge, but an administrator who will just look at paperwork and make a decision. I also know the weasel's best/boy friend is good at faking documents and it makes me sad that he would stoop so low as to put our house in foreclosure rather than agree to sell it or even have it appraised just to screw me over. He's hurting himself financially just to hurt me. It's bad enough he rejected me and drove me away but to conspire so that I can't even have insurance is beneath contempt.
> 
> I never thought he would be capable of such hateful things. I was a good wife to him until he became controlling and abusive. Now that I see what he's truly capable of, I'm worried that he might not be taking care of Nacho as I once thought he would, as the honorable thing. He has no honor. I don't know this man. He's a stranger to me.



HUGS Lainey! I will keep you in my prayers!


I am sad because my little sister is pregnant, has a 5 year old, still has to work as a nurse, her husband is coming home today after open-heart surgery last Friday.... she just has so much on her plate!!! My brother-in-law has a long, debilitating recovery... and my older sister just had a miscarriage. I just want to take it all away from them as I love them so much!!


----------



## seavixen

Seeing my dad in so much pain. 

I feel like I'm going to crack.


----------



## moore2me

CastingPearls said:


> My ex is suing me to not have to pay alimony because he's claiming unemployment, which he will have to prove. Unfortunately, he's a member of a "Let's Screw Over the Ex-Wives Club' and is the third of them to use this tactic to get out of child support and alimony.
> 
> I'm more concerned about the insurance I may lose if he wins. I have to appear at a hearing on July 2nd. There will be no judge, but an administrator who will just look at paperwork and make a decision. I also know the weasel's best/boy friend is good at faking documents and it makes me sad that he would stoop so low as to put our house in foreclosure rather than agree to sell it or even have it appraised just to screw me over. He's hurting himself financially just to hurt me. It's bad enough he rejected me and drove me away but to conspire so that I can't even have insurance is beneath contempt.
> 
> I never thought he would be capable of such hateful things. I was a good wife to him until he became controlling and abusive. Now that I see what he's truly capable of, I'm worried that he might not be taking care of Nacho as I once thought he would, as the honorable thing. He has no honor. I don't know this man. He's a stranger to me.



Lainey,

Some men can be vindictive bums when their male pride is wounded. Be thankful there are no kids to add to this nasty mix. On the insurance thing, check with your rights as a covered participant. *I know my husband's insurance gives me certain rights that I can keep if he cancels his policy. It lets me (under COBRA) keep my part of the policy for 18 months after he quits. I just have to pay more (my part + some of the employer's part), but at least you have insurance for a year and a half more. *In the interim, you can check for a separate policy or go to work for someone who will give you insurance as part of your job. (The state or federal government is the best bet for picking up a new policy.)

Also, I am not a lawyer, but I thought you have rights to examine the documents he uses as evidence. I know in some cases, he has to share them with you before he introduces something new so that your team can evaluate the docs and prepare a defense. If this is not true, I would make my own doc (just like you think he has) and use it as an ace in the hole. Don't pull it out unless he starts the dirty business. Just as you suspect his friend will produce something fishy - you too can produce something equally fishy. Be it known tho, I am not encouraging you to commit fraud, just a little creative writing. 

If you know someone who is good at creative and imaginative writing,   you should be able to produce documentation pretty equal to any crap or dirt he dishes up.


----------



## Aust99

My third cold for the winter... I wish parents would keep their kids home from school if they're sick.... I'm not a baby sitting service and I'm tired of catching their colds....


----------



## kaylaisamachine

Last day in Michigan and my cousin isn't even here to spend it with me. Instead she went to her boyfriend's last night after we got back from Cedar Point and said, "I'll probably be here before you leave tomorrow." 

Probably my ass.


----------



## rellis10

Fondly remembered, yet long gone, moments of a year ago.


----------



## Surlysomething

That I matter so little to the people I care the most about.


It's heartbreaking.


----------



## thatgirl08

CastingPearls said:


> My ex is suing me to not have to pay alimony because he's claiming unemployment, which he will have to prove. Unfortunately, he's a member of a "Let's Screw Over the Ex-Wives Club' and is the third of them to use this tactic to get out of child support and alimony.
> 
> I'm more concerned about the insurance I may lose if he wins. I have to appear at a hearing on July 2nd. There will be no judge, but an administrator who will just look at paperwork and make a decision. I also know the weasel's best/boy friend is good at faking documents and it makes me sad that he would stoop so low as to put our house in foreclosure rather than agree to sell it or even have it appraised just to screw me over. He's hurting himself financially just to hurt me. It's bad enough he rejected me and drove me away but to conspire so that I can't even have insurance is beneath contempt.
> 
> I never thought he would be capable of such hateful things. I was a good wife to him until he became controlling and abusive. Now that I see what he's truly capable of, I'm worried that he might not be taking care of Nacho as I once thought he would, as the honorable thing. He has no honor. I don't know this man. He's a stranger to me.



I'm assuming you mean you were eligible under your ex-husband's plan for his health insurance? If the company he works for has over 20 employees then federal law dictates that the company needs to offer you COBRA which is a continued insurance plan. If they have less than 20 employees then it differs by state but most states offer some level of COBRA regardless of employee count. It's expensive but at least it's insurance. Don't quote me on the exact accuracy of this but I have a fair idea of how COBRA works since I write employee handbooks for a living now.. and I just asked my roomie/best friend who works in the COBRA department at the company I work for and she said my numbers were spot on. You & your ex should both be offered COBRA even if he is laid off, up to (I believe) 18 months. I know NY state also has an extension under certain circumstances so other states may as well.. not sure where you live, but I would check into that. So don't lose hope, you do have some protection under the law.


----------



## Deven

My uncle passed away this morning. We got a call last week that his cancer had officially returned. It took less than a week and he's gone.

Our last visit wasn't happy. I was angry at my father (for his own death, which was unreasonable) and all my Uncle saw was my father's military record. I didn't get the chance to say I'm sorry or good-bye.

I've known since 10 am, but it hasn't really sunk in until a little bit ago. I've been going through my computer and cataloging everything for backup when I found a picture of him and my aunt on his custom made "trike." He had back surgery and had his motorcycle turned into a trike so that it would be safe and comfortable for him to ride.

It hurts.


----------



## That Guy You Met Once

I'm sorry, DevenDoom.

---

I love my girlfriend, and she loves me back, but I'm very unhappy in our relationship.

The main problem is probably that she's too young. (She's 18, I'm 21, for the record.) 

She still lives with her grandmother, is only allowed out at night one or two days a week, and only until midnight, and doesn't control her own schedule, so she's always having to cancel our plans a few hours beforehand because grandma's making her clean or go out with relatives. It's going on a month since we've had any time alone. We've talked about this several times, but there's nothing either of us can do about it. She'll be starting a job and entering college soon, so she'll be even more busy, but doesn't have any plans to move out yet.

I got out of a long-distance relationship that was going nowhere, now it seems like I'm already in another one.


----------



## Aust99

I rolled my ankle at work today. Can't put any weight on it (ha). I was off work with a cold last week for two days. Now I'm off for at least three days.... I just want to go to work. It's harder to not go with the planning and he kiddies missing out. Oh and I'm in a shit load of pain!


----------



## Surlysomething

Aust99 said:


> I rolled my ankle at work today. Can't put any weight on it (ha). I was off work with a cold last week for two days. Now I'm off for at least three days.... I just want to go to work. It's harder to not go with the planning and he kiddies missing out. Oh and I'm in a shit load of pain!



Girl, I totally know how you're feeling. I rolled my ankle at work two weeks ago and fell to the ground like a bag of bricks. My ankle is so weak from previous sprains that this happens about once every six months for me. I'm still wearing my tensor bandage on it right now because it's tender. I had to take a day off work but because i'm so stubborn (and can't afford to take time off) I went to work way sooner than I should have.

Remember, RICE. Rest, Ice, Compression, Elevation! I find frozen peas work the best. Haha.

Feel better!


----------



## Micara

I think I sabotage my own life because it's the only way to get myself to feel anything sometimes.


----------



## moore2me

Aust99 said:


> I rolled my ankle at work today. Can't put any weight on it (ha). I was off work with a cold last week for two days. Now I'm off for at least three days.... I just want to go to work. It's harder to not go with the planning and he kiddies missing out. Oh and I'm in a shit load of pain!



*Dear Aust, Since you injured yourself at work, you should file an accident report with your employer if you haven't done this already. This will cover your medical treatment if the injury does not get better or if you need more time or a different job until you heal. * Do it.


WARNING. The following may be too much information:

If I can fill out a workers comp form for my last workplace accident - you can too. I sat on a wall mounted toilet and it broke and cracked on the floor. I cut my butt and had to go to the ER to have the porcelain picked out and the wound cleaned. The resulting workers comp form and what I wrote on it got lots of yuks all around. I am no means suggesting you have to do what I did, but I am a ham and a comedian (when I want to be). I called about 30 people in state government & workers comp, and told them my story so my collateral ego damage was spun in my direction.


----------



## Aust99

Surlysomething said:


> Girl, I totally know how you're feeling. I rolled my ankle at work two weeks ago and fell to the ground like a bag of bricks. My ankle is so weak from previous sprains that this happens about once every six months for me. I'm still wearing my tensor bandage on it right now because it's tender. I had to take a day off work but because i'm so stubborn (and can't afford to take time off) I went to work way sooner than I should have.
> 
> Remember, RICE. Rest, Ice, Compression, Elevation! I find frozen peas work the best. Haha.
> 
> Feel better!





moore2me said:


> *Dear Aust, Since you injured yourself at work, you should file an accident report with your employer if you haven't done this already. This will cover your medical treatment if the injury does not get better or if you need more time or a different job until you heal. * Do it.
> 
> 
> WARNING. The following may be too much information:
> 
> If I can fill out a workers comp form for my last workplace accident - you can too. I sat on a wall mounted toilet and it broke and cracked on the floor. I cut my butt and had to go to the ER to have the porcelain picked out and the wound cleaned. The resulting workers comp form and what I wrote on it got lots of yuks all around. I am no means suggesting you have to do what I did, but I am a ham and a comedian (when I want to be). I called about 30 people in state government & workers comp, and told them my story so my collateral ego damage was spun in my direction.




Thanks guys. My boss suggested doing that too so when I get back to work ill file the incident report. My doctors already started the paperwork. Such a painful experience though.


----------



## BrownEyedChica

That I can't express what I REALLY feel to some people.


----------



## spiritangel

That I just found out a woman I have known through a few incarnations of basically the same scrapbooking group has breast cancer, in both of her breasts. She is an amazing and giving woman and it breaks my heart to see and know how much she is going to go through over the next few months.

Think I might make her a wee angel bear to watch over her


----------



## ODFFA

I'm up really early transcribing a long counselling session that is so, so sad *sniff sniff*. At the same time, it makes me feel very fortunate though.


----------



## kaylaisamachine

I don't understand why guys must lie. I've given up hope. I thought this once, he would be different, from what I can see, and the fact that he could lie and keep from me something SO big just goes to show that I was wrong. Why must I give my heart so easily? I'm done trying.


----------



## CastingPearls

kaylaisamachine said:


> I don't understand why guys must lie. I've given up hope. I thought this once, he would be different, from what I can see, and the fact that he could lie and keep from me something SO big just goes to show that I was wrong. Why must I give my heart so easily? I'm done trying.


There are seven billion people in the world. Don't let one jerk ruin it for the right person for you. We all make mistakes and we tend to blame ourselves especially in relationships (at every stage) but very often, it's not you, AT ALL. It's them. It's their issues. Don't let them become yours.

(((((Kayla)))))


----------



## Surlysomething

I tried and fought so hard for something I believed in so very much....


...and in the end it still wasn't enough.


*exhale*


----------



## CastingPearls

thatgirl08 said:


> I'm assuming you mean you were eligible under your ex-husband's plan for his health insurance? If the company he works for has over 20 employees then federal law dictates that the company needs to offer you COBRA which is a continued insurance plan. If they have less than 20 employees then it differs by state but most states offer some level of COBRA regardless of employee count. It's expensive but at least it's insurance. Don't quote me on the exact accuracy of this but I have a fair idea of how COBRA works since I write employee handbooks for a living now.. and I just asked my roomie/best friend who works in the COBRA department at the company I work for and she said my numbers were spot on. You & your ex should both be offered COBRA even if he is laid off, up to (I believe) 18 months. I know NY state also has an extension under certain circumstances so other states may as well.. not sure where you live, but I would check into that. So don't lose hope, you do have some protection under the law.


I had to wait until court today to find out what the story was with him re insurance but his company (a major computer company) did offer Cobra and he turned it down because he would be legally obliged in our state to have me covered too and it would have been more than his unemployment checks. I know that when I was sick and ended my employment, I too was offered Cobra and the monthly fee was prohibitive.

I'm on permanent disability so it's Medicaid/Medicare and Part D for me as soon as I get his former company to sign off to them on when my coverage ended.


----------



## CastingPearls

moore2me said:


> Lainey,
> 
> Some men can be vindictive bums when their male pride is wounded. Be thankful there are no kids to add to this nasty mix. On the insurance thing, check with your rights as a covered participant. *I know my husband's insurance gives me certain rights that I can keep if he cancels his policy. It lets me (under COBRA) keep my part of the policy for 18 months after he quits. I just have to pay more (my part + some of the employer's part), but at least you have insurance for a year and a half more. *In the interim, you can check for a separate policy or go to work for someone who will give you insurance as part of your job. (The state or federal government is the best bet for picking up a new policy.)
> 
> Also, I am not a lawyer, but I thought you have rights to examine the documents he uses as evidence. I know in some cases, he has to share them with you before he introduces something new so that your team can evaluate the docs and prepare a defense. If this is not true, I would make my own doc (just like you think he has) and use it as an ace in the hole. Don't pull it out unless he starts the dirty business. Just as you suspect his friend will produce something fishy - you too can produce something equally fishy. Be it known tho, I am not encouraging you to commit fraud, just a little creative writing.
> 
> If you know someone who is good at creative and imaginative writing,   you should be able to produce documentation pretty equal to any crap or dirt he dishes up.


I will not falsify anything under any circumstances. Too much bad karma. However, we challenged all his documentation, most of which would have been noted as blatantly fabricated even by my cat. Now we look forward to several continuances while he continues to pay interim alimony. Cobra is out of the question--too much money. I'm going on Medicaid/Medicare. He's on his own.


----------



## moore2me

CastingPearls said:


> I will not falsify anything under any circumstances. Too much bad karma. However, we challenged all his documentation, most of which would have been noted as blatantly fabricated even by my cat. Now we look forward to several continuances while he continues to pay interim alimony. Cobra is out of the question--too much money. I'm going on Medicaid/Medicare. He's on his own.



When I declined Mr M2M's (I did it because I had a policy thru my employer), I had to sign off that I was doing so willingly. There is a paper trail that I chose not to be carried on his policy.

Also, with OBAMA's new health care initiative being upheld by the supreme court, more possibilities should open up for you to obtain health care insurance. I am pretty sure that several large insurance companies are already planning policies to bring in marginal clients like me into their company fold. If you're interested, I would start with Blue Cross/Blue Shield.

I have some additional comments about falsifying anything under any circumstances. I am not directing these comments toward you, just internalizing my past experiences . . . 

Things I have falsified at some point in my bizarre little life.
1. My weight
2. My age (when I was in college and wanted to drink in bars or buy liquor).
3. When asked the age old question "Was it good for you?"
4. When asked by another woman "How do you like my hair?"
5. When telling new parents "What a cute baby".
6. When telling parents of a young toddler or pre-schooler "He is so smart!"
7. When my husband asked me "Did you buy chocolate candy at the store?"
8. When eating at a friend's house & I am served some weird, strange food, I would say, "The lunch was delicious! Can I have your recipe?"
9. When I go to visit a friend & their house smells like cat urine. I bite my tongue and say nothing.
10. And the classic question, "Do these pants make my butt look big?"


----------



## Mishty

Mama came over to swim with the kids and me, she was in a weird mood which I ignored because I haven't spent any time with her lately. She made a comment to me I didn't care for but brushed it off. Then with her sweet little voice she said something kind of bitter toward her little sister and I just told her flat out she was being a bitch. She went silent, frowned into her coffee and said she had to get home.

I fucking hate. HATE. Fighting with the sweetest human on the planet,but no one else will. No one fights back,no one acts upset. They coddle her feelings even when she's killing them with kindness. 

Fuck I really wanted to spend the day with her too. 
I'll have to go broke and buy her a god damn flower or plant to get back in her good graces. :doh:


----------



## cinnamitch

Andy Griffith died. No it's not a soul shattering event, but it's just one more icon from my childhood that's gone.


----------



## TwilightStarr

My mom spent $500 to get her fixed today and it wasn't even out of the shop 2 hours and it broke down again in the middle of the road!!

SERIOUSLY?!?!


----------



## Surlysomething

I'm pretty sure he has someone new.

I used to love knowing he was mine. But now i'm pretty sure he never was at all. And it really shouldn't hurt me this bad, it's not high school. Stupid heart.


----------



## rg770Ibanez

All the arguing man ughh


----------



## CastingPearls

Surlysomething said:


> I'm pretty sure he has someone new.
> 
> I used to love knowing he was mine. But now i'm pretty sure he never was at all. And it really shouldn't hurt me this bad, it's not high school. Stupid heart.


Your heart is not stupid. One day you're going to really know deep in your heart that you really are better off not having someone who didn't want you as much as you wanted him. You deserve that. 

Hugs, big big hugs.


----------



## Surlysomething

CastingPearls said:


> Your heart is not stupid. One day you're going to really know deep in your heart that you really are better off not having someone who didn't want you as much as you wanted him. You deserve that.
> 
> Hugs, big big hugs.




Thanks so much, L. The fact that it hurts me this much still...I don't even know what to say. Just when I think i'm good...i'm not. I know you know what I mean and I think of your heart often.

-big hugs back-


----------



## rellis10

That job I was so happy to get a little over three months ago? Yeah, I don't have it anymore.

I'm just not suited to sales it seems. They seemed positive about everything else I did, but it's hard to avoid that sales is, or was, the largest aspect of the job and I just wasn't meant for it.

Still, I'm sure there's something else right around the corner.


----------



## imfree

Surlysomething said:


> I'm pretty sure he has someone new.
> 
> I used to love knowing he was mine. But now i'm pretty sure he never was at all. And it really shouldn't hurt me this bad, *it's not high school. Stupid heart.*



Your heart is good. Despite pushing 60, I'm like the Tin Man in The Wizard of Oz, I know I have a heart because it gets broken. To me, it's better to have a broken heart on the mend than to not have one at all. I wish comfort for you.


----------



## Surlysomething

imfree said:


> Your heart is good. Despite pushing 60, I'm like the Tin Man in The Wizard of Oz, I know I have a heart because it gets broken. To me, it's better to have a broken heart on the mend than to not have one at all. I wish comfort for you.



Thanks, Edgar. You're really sweet.


----------



## Surlysomething

You could have been with me today, loving life...


----------



## Victoria08

My neighbour was found dead today. I had no idea anything was wrong, I was just opening the door to let some air in and I saw his body being loaded into the Coroner's van. He was such a great guy and I know he will be missed terribly.


----------



## kaylaisamachine

Still no luck on finding a new place. I hope the lady calls me back for the one place I really want. I'm gunning for it.


----------



## Surlysomething

You make me feel so shitty about myself.


----------



## Weirdo890

I just can't seem to shake a feeling of gloom and doom.


----------



## Ruffie

Surly I am so sorry that he didn't realize what he had. I have been there but you know it makes room for someone to come into your life that will love you as you deserve!


----------



## Ruffie

I got sad news that one of the kids that called me mom hung himself in his driveway yesterday. And I have to sit through two days of suicide intervention training starting today. Its going to be hard.


----------



## AuntHen

Ruffie said:


> I got sad news that one of the kids that called me mom hung himself in his driveway yesterday. And I have to sit through two days of suicide intervention training starting today. Its going to be hard.



Ruffie, I am so sorry for your loss!  HUGS!!!!


----------



## Surlysomething

Ruffie said:


> Surly I am so sorry that he didn't realize what he had. I have been there but you know it makes room for someone to come into your life that will love you as you deserve!


 

Thanks, lady. I'm working on letting go.


----------



## Surlysomething

Ruffie said:


> I got sad news that one of the kids that called me mom hung himself in his driveway yesterday. And I have to sit through two days of suicide intervention training starting today. Its going to be hard.


 
I'm so sorry. So much heartache with these young people. *big hug*


----------



## Mishty

I don't know how to react to men.
I probably already scared him away with coolness. 

I'm just so damn cold.


----------



## moore2me

Ruffie said:


> I got sad news that one of the kids that called me mom hung himself in his driveway yesterday. And I have to sit through two days of suicide intervention training starting today. Its going to be hard.



Dear Ruffie, What horrible news that another kid left this life too early. As to the suicide intervention training, there may be some ideas that will help you in the grieving process too. I do not have many answers in the youth suicide problem except that when a kid gets depressed or gets in trouble (with his peers or with getting along in life) we should take it seriously. We should think of it like a kid with a life threatening disease and quickly get him/her the appropriate help.

Sadly, what happened to you Ruffie is one of the bad parts of working with kids. (The same thing can be said of working with the elderly, with animals, or with babies.) Little ones, kids, and older people can be very rewarding to work with - we get great appreciation and satisfaction. The same way as working with animals - unconditional love. The bad part (and fortunately it is less than the good part) is sometimes a kid choses suicide, or a baby dies, or an animal has to be euthanized. This time is tough for caretakers to overcome and it is a common cause of burnout or changing occupations - we cannot take the saddness - grief is an occupational hazard.

And sometimes, it can get worse. I do not like to speak ill of the dead but - there have been cases of apparent suicide that were really a form of auto-eroticism gone wrong. We had a young man in our community die this way. And some suicides are actually murders. This is more likely when drugs, gangs, or a bad relationship with a partner. One last cautionary note, suicides may run in a rash or pattern like a contagious disease - it sort of spreads to the adolescent community - this is very dangerous and needs more help than I have to offer.

But, sorry for your loss Ruffie. I know your cup is full already - you did not need more trouble than you already are carrying. God bless you.


----------



## one2one

Ruffie said:


> I got sad news that one of the kids that called me mom hung himself in his driveway yesterday. And I have to sit through two days of suicide intervention training starting today. Its going to be hard.



I'm so sorry for your loss, Ruffie. I wish you were scheduled for grief intervention instead, but I know from experience that the worst moments in life bring very unexpected gifts along with them. One of the things about losing someone to suicide that's particularly difficult is that it can be uncomfortable for other people to talk about it, even though you need to. With any other loss, you'd be able to say, "She had cancer" or "He died is a car accident", but people sometimes react differently to suicide. I hope one of your gifts will be that the training will allow you to be in a place where it's OK to talk about it, and it will bring you some comfort and peace.


----------



## Linda

I gave so much of myself into being a good step mother and raising two very damaged little girls. They came to us 9 years ago not being able to speak, eating out of dog bowls on the floor, failing in school, anger and depression issues and acting out like some sort of cave people. When my ex and I got divorced four years ago they were lovely young ladies. Beautiful inside and out and excelling in school. Well rounded teenagers that I am so proud to call my daughters. 

Sadly I have spent the past four years fighting to see them and stay a part of their life but the journey has become too painful and I have hit my final brick wall. 

I have learned that heartbreak can cause physical pain. I know they love me and that they know I will always love them and for now that has to be enough.Patience is difficult when you're hurting this much but I am forced to wait, and I will until I can wrap my arms around you again.


----------



## Ruffie

Thank you everyone. He had mental health issues and when he moved from here to be closer to his family in another province I was worried as they had not been able to support him much in the past. I had taken the suicide intervention training before and this is just like a refresher. I had been able to intervene with him and many other youth in the past. It was just a little raw to be sitting there talking about indicating factors coming up with reasons to live reasons to die and so on. However our trainer was wonderful and said that we should share our experiences both personal and professional this morning and so that was very helpful to everyone as we were able to share with each other.

I just pray he is able to finally have the peace he sought on the other side and knew how much he was loved.

I do appreciate all the kind words from everyone *hugs to you all*


----------



## BigBrwnSugar1

Realizing that he's embarrassed to be seen in public with me. Only good for one thing.


----------



## Surlysomething

I lose time hating myself.


----------



## That Guy You Met Once

At the end of this year, I'll have a combined total of six years of long-distance relationships, and no other kind.

I've reached the point where I just I don't think I can find any relationships that aren't long-distance.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

That Guy You Met Once said:


> At the end of this year, I'll have a combined total of six years of long-distance relationships, and no other kind.
> 
> I've reached the point where I just I don't think I can find any relationships that aren't long-distance.


Hear, hear. I haven't ever had a relationship that wasn't. I completely get it.


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

*That when I dropped my daughter off at school she gave me a hug, a kiss and said Bye Mommy, see you soon! Heart melted  She is growing up too fast!*


----------



## Mathias

The shooting in Colorado. I can't understand why people would do something so horrible.


----------



## EllorionsDarlingAngel

Mathias said:


> The shooting in Colorado. I can't understand why people would do something so horrible.



I agree Mathias. I can't either it is so sad! My heart goes out to the victims and their families.


----------



## Rojodi

Mathias said:


> The shooting in Colorado. I can't understand why people would do something so horrible.



And the Congresswoman's knee-jerk reaction: If someone in the theater had a gun...Um, please, there were service people among the dead, according to Pentegon sources.


----------



## LeoGibson

Rojodi said:


> And the Congresswoman's knee-jerk reaction: If someone in the theater had a gun...Um, please, there were service people among the dead, according to Pentegon sources.



Um, off duty service people are unarmed unless they have a ccp. They are not the same as off duty cops. Let's keep the jerky knees on either side at bay.


----------



## Rojodi

LeoGibson said:


> Um, off duty service people are unarmed unless they have a ccp. They are not the same as off duty cops. Let's keep the jerky knees on either side at bay.



I'm sorry that my poorly worded tyrate caused you to infer that I thought off-duty service personel were armed.

I also NEVER called for the ban of guns. (For those who infer I did.)


----------



## Surlysomething

Rojodi said:


> I'm sorry that my poorly worded tyrate caused you to infer that I thought off-duty service personel were armed.
> 
> I also NEVER called for the ban of guns. (For those who infer I did.)




What congresswoman are you talking about? I didn't see anything mentioned by Mathias about a congresswoman.


----------



## Rojodi

Surlysomething said:


> What congresswoman are you talking about? I didn't see anything mentioned by Mathias about a congresswoman.



Congressman, sorry. Congresswoman from CO lost her husband in Long Island shooting, sorry. 

Taken Out of Context?


----------



## Surlysomething

Rojodi said:


> Congressman, sorry. Congresswoman from CO lost her husband in Long Island shooting, sorry.
> 
> Taken Out of Context?




But I still don't know how it applied to anything that was said in the post that you quoted.


----------



## Rojodi

Surlysomething said:


> But I still don't know how it applied to anything that was said in the post that you quoted.



Sad that politicians use tragedies like this for personal and political gain


----------



## CastingPearls

That I still miss him and he doesn't deserve it but I do anyway.


----------



## Surlysomething

Rojodi said:


> Sad that politicians use tragedies like this for personal and political gain




Nowhere in any of the posts about this tragedy in_ this thread_ was any mention of politicians.


----------



## Aust99

EllorionsDarlingAngel said:


> *That when I dropped my daughter off at school she gave me a hug, a kiss and said Bye Mommy, see you soon! Heart melted  She is growing up too fast!*



No way is she old enough for school!!! Where did the time go! 

Welcome back EDA.


----------



## spiritangel

CastingPearls said:


> That I still miss him and he doesn't deserve it but I do anyway.



Lots of Hugs, wish there was an easy soloution to that, but it is one of those sucky parts of life. Lots and Lots of squishy hugs


----------



## seavixen

There are so many more logical things to be sad about, but, really, I'm just kinda bummed to be 30.


----------



## kaylaisamachine

We didn't get the apartment. Now it's back to square one.


----------



## littlefairywren

Linda said:


> I gave so much of myself into being a good step mother and raising two very damaged little girls. They came to us 9 years ago not being able to speak, eating out of dog bowls on the floor, failing in school, anger and depression issues and acting out like some sort of cave people. When my ex and I got divorced four years ago they were lovely young ladies. Beautiful inside and out and excelling in school. Well rounded teenagers that I am so proud to call my daughters.
> 
> Sadly I have spent the past four years fighting to see them and stay a part of their life but the journey has become too painful and I have hit my final brick wall.
> 
> I have learned that heartbreak can cause physical pain. I know they love me and that they know I will always love them and for now that has to be enough.Patience is difficult when you're hurting this much but I am forced to wait, and I will until I can wrap my arms around you again.



Your girls would love you as much as you love them. How could they not? You are one of the kindest, good hearted, decent and sweetest people I know here at Dims, Linda. 

Keep drumming away the hurt and anger. You will wrap your arms around them again xx


----------



## Ho Ho Tai

Linda said:


> I gave so much of myself into being a good step mother and raising two very damaged little girls. They came to us 9 years ago not being able to speak, eating out of dog bowls on the floor, failing in school, anger and depression issues and acting out like some sort of cave people. When my ex and I got divorced four years ago they were lovely young ladies. Beautiful inside and out and excelling in school. Well rounded teenagers that I am so proud to call my daughters.



Linda - You have succeeded at the best and highest calling that any of us can attain to - helping someone else on to their own personal success. Pure Mudita!

To create a silly metaphor, some of us seem destined to reach the moon and stars. Some of us are the booster rockets - launching them into orbit and then falling back, hoping only to get a glimpse of them as they blaze off through the universe on their way to infinity. 

Know that your contribution is eternally etched on them. Your name, too, will be out among the stars.


----------



## Micara

I went to Sonic this morning, like I do every morning, and found out that one of my Sonic girls, the one who was so good about giving me salsa, was killed by a drunk driver this weekend.


----------



## CastingPearls

Tiger died. His body just wouldn't accept the insulin no matter what kind, no matter what we did. The last three nights he slept on my bed or next to it and I kept telling him I loved him and he was a good beautiful boy and I'd see him in heaven one day and my dad took him to the vet and they said his body just broke down and he was in a lot of pain so it was for the best to put him down. 

He was a sweet goofy loveable furboy. I'm glad I got to know him living here this past year and glad I got to tell him that I loved him. He was loved by his fur-brothers and Wonton and they miss him a lot.

I would have done anything to save him. He was worth every penny.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

CastingPearls said:


> Tiger died. His body just wouldn't accept the insulin no matter what kind, no matter what we did. The last three nights he slept on my bed or next to it and I kept telling him I loved him and he was a good beautiful boy and I'd see him in heaven one day and my dad took him to the vet and they said his body just broke down and he was in a lot of pain so it was for the best to put him down.
> 
> He was a sweet goofy loveable furboy. I'm glad I got to know him living here this past year and glad I got to tell him that I loved him. He was loved by his fur-brothers and Wonton and they miss him a lot.
> 
> I would have done anything to save him. He was worth every penny.


Aw, Lainey, I'm so sorry for your loss.


----------



## littlefairywren

CastingPearls said:


> Tiger died. His body just wouldn't accept the insulin no matter what kind, no matter what we did. The last three nights he slept on my bed or next to it and I kept telling him I loved him and he was a good beautiful boy and I'd see him in heaven one day and my dad took him to the vet and they said his body just broke down and he was in a lot of pain so it was for the best to put him down.
> 
> He was a sweet goofy loveable furboy. I'm glad I got to know him living here this past year and glad I got to tell him that I loved him. He was loved by his fur-brothers and Wonton and they miss him a lot.
> 
> I would have done anything to save him. He was worth every penny.



Poor wee Tiger. How sad to read this news, Lainey. I know you loved him and I know he knew that. Soft hugs.


----------



## imfree

CastingPearls said:


> Tiger died. His body just wouldn't accept the insulin no matter what kind, no matter what we did. The last three nights he slept on my bed or next to it and I kept telling him I loved him and he was a good beautiful boy and I'd see him in heaven one day and my dad took him to the vet and they said his body just broke down and he was in a lot of pain so it was for the best to put him down.
> 
> He was a sweet goofy loveable furboy. I'm glad I got to know him living here this past year and glad I got to tell him that I loved him. He was loved by his fur-brothers and Wonton and they miss him a lot.
> 
> I would have done anything to save him. He was worth every penny.



Our furkids are such lovely friends and God, how it hurts to lose them. My condolences in your time of loss.


----------



## seavixen

Dad's cancer is in his hip, pelvic bone, and now spine. He's driving himself 200 miles round trip once a week for chemo. He's a super hero...


----------



## Mathias

Micara said:


> I went to Sonic this morning, like I do every morning, and found out that one of my Sonic girls, the one who was so good about giving me salsa, was killed by a drunk driver this weekend.





CastingPearls said:


> Tiger died. His body just wouldn't accept the insulin no matter what kind, no matter what we did. The last three nights he slept on my bed or next to it and I kept telling him I loved him and he was a good beautiful boy and I'd see him in heaven one day and my dad took him to the vet and they said his body just broke down and he was in a lot of pain so it was for the best to put him down.
> 
> He was a sweet goofy loveable furboy. I'm glad I got to know him living here this past year and glad I got to tell him that I loved him. He was loved by his fur-brothers and Wonton and they miss him a lot.
> 
> I would have done anything to save him. He was worth every penny.



I''m sorry for your losses. ((Hugs)) to you both.


----------



## b0nnie

I'm sad that I'm not happy about possibly(home tests were + gotta go to the doctor to be sure) being pregnant and I'm even more sad that he had absolutely no reaction at all when I told him.

I know every child is a gift yet I'm not ready to do this all over again, especially alone, and I just can't stop crying.


----------



## Hozay J Garseeya

I'm sad I feel perplexed at a decision that may change the rest of my life.


----------



## Librarygirl

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> I'm sad I feel perplexed at a decision that may change the rest of my life.



I can't rep you, but I hope you're ok.

We're all here if you need advice! Goodness knows, enough people on here have helped me out when I've posted random angsty things.


----------



## LeoGibson

CastingPearls said:


> Tiger died. His body just wouldn't accept the insulin no matter what kind, no matter what we did. The last three nights he slept on my bed or next to it and I kept telling him I loved him and he was a good beautiful boy and I'd see him in heaven one day and my dad took him to the vet and they said his body just broke down and he was in a lot of pain so it was for the best to put him down.
> 
> He was a sweet goofy loveable furboy. I'm glad I got to know him living here this past year and glad I got to tell him that I loved him. He was loved by his fur-brothers and Wonton and they miss him a lot.
> 
> I would have done anything to save him. He was worth every penny.



I'm sorry for your loss. Words aren't much comfort so I'll just send you good thoughts and an Internet hug.


----------



## Twilley

frustration with life in general as usual. Just have to make it until September, but right now I could use a big soft hug


----------



## Hozay J Garseeya

Librarygirl said:


> I can't rep you, but I hope you're ok.
> 
> We're all here if you need advice! Goodness knows, enough people on here have helped me out when I've posted random angsty things.



Thank you ma'am, it means a lot. 

And for the rest of you, thanks for the nice texts and PMs


----------



## moore2me

Dear Lainey,

I took the liberty of channeling Tiger's spirit to write you a note. A copy of it is attached and a zipped file. The original is bigger and easier to read but I had to resize it this small to get DIMS to accept it. If you have some where I can send a 250 KB JPEG File, I will forward it somewhere else.

M2M 

View attachment ecat7.jpg


View attachment E CAT ZIP.zip


----------



## CastingPearls

Thank you everyone.


----------



## ODFFA

My dad just took my mom to the hospital. She's been feeling terrible all night and really didn't look good this morning. I have no idea what's going on & am trying to concentrate on meeting a noonday work deadline while feeling a bit worried.


----------



## Surlysomething

ODFFA said:


> My dad just took my mom to the hospital. She's been feeling terrible all night and really didn't look good this morning. I have no idea what's going on & am trying to concentrate on meeting a noonday work deadline while feeling a bit worried.


 
Good thoughts your way, lady. *hug*


----------



## Librarygirl

ODFFA said:


> My dad just took my mom to the hospital. She's been feeling terrible all night and really didn't look good this morning. I have no idea what's going on & am trying to concentrate on meeting a noonday work deadline while feeling a bit worried.



Thinking of you and your family. I hope all is well and she's feeling better soon.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

b0nnie said:


> I'm sad that I'm not happy about possibly(home tests were + gotta go to the doctor to be sure) being pregnant and I'm even more sad that he had absolutely no reaction at all when I told him.
> 
> I know every child is a gift yet I'm not ready to do this all over again, especially alone, and I just can't stop crying.



Bonnie, I couldn't just let this go unacknowledged. I"m so sorry you're so sad right now... I really hope the baby's father comes around and you can both find joy in the impending birth of this little one and/or figure out what is best for all of you. *Big hugs*


----------



## TwilightStarr

The fact that my sister is making some really selfish and shitty decisions these past couple months, not taking in any consideration the effect it will have on her son.


----------



## ODFFA

Surlysomething said:


> Good thoughts your way, lady. *hug*





Librarygirl said:


> Thinking of you and your family. I hope all is well and she's feeling better soon.



Thank you so much ladies! It turned out to be nothing serious. My mom's still in a little bit of pain, but really starting to feel much better. It was all so sudden, hehe. I did have to help my dad with cancelling some of his appointments and ended up missing my own work deadline by a couple of hours, but no serious consequences from that either. I really appreciate you thinking of me though - was the weirdest of days


----------



## That Guy You Met Once

I live in a Tri-City area of 4 million people. But there is nothing worth doing here. I've been looking for ten years. I found nothing. All I can afford is to drink and window-shop. Bars and clubs are terrible. Just shitty electropop, people who think they're too good for you, and too expensive drinks. Drive around aimlessly, but nothing to see. Everything in Florida looks the same.

I don't see hope for my relationship, which is now effectively long-distance - even though she only lives 10 miles away - because her family won't let her out. I want to break up, but I don't want to break her heart after she's been so good to me, and it's not her fault anyway. Still feel trapped, though. It's just the wrong time. 

I draw up to 10 hours almost every day, but my art career pays nothing, and almost no one even cares besides the occasional compliment. Put in one halfhearted application for a real job every day, get no responses. I don't want another one if it's going to be as miserable as my last one, anyway. 

Car needs another $200 repair to keep engine from blowing up. This is on top of the almost $9,000 I've already put into repairs in the one year I've owned it. But can't afford payments on a new one with no job, and no public transportation here.

Rats and roaches at home. Hear them running around at night. Tired of roommates. One nags about my weight, gets angry whenever I forget to wash a single dish, insults me, complains about everything. Other lives off of disability check, and does nothing at all, ever, but play games all day and invite loud friends over.

Therapist hasn't done anything but suggest my relationship might not be working and I might not like my roommates. No shit, Sherlock. But has at least prescribed Ritalin for my ADD. Most useful thing she's ever done. 

Best friend still reclusive. Lives too far away for seeing her to be practical, anyway. And hates her body so much she's depressing to be around. Still talks about little besides diets, what's on TV, and her plans to move out in the future, with a later date each time we talk about it.

Mother begs me for help or money to keep her from foreclosure. In no position to give money or drive 100 miles a week to see her, especially after history of abuse. Beginning to ignore her calls.

Try socializing on internet. Usually ignored by everyone. Check Facebook every few minutes to see if GF is online. Usually not. Masturbate three to five times a day. Porn gets more awful by the day. A hollow simulation of real affection.

Stopped caring about the outside world. Never hear about anything good, anyway. Local animal shelters kill 20,000 pets a year, according to some pamphlet at old work. 200,000 people die every day. No point in hearing all the news stories about the ones who did it most horrifically.

Can barely afford food and gas. Not eating or sleeping very much. Very tired. Talking about it doesn't seem to help, but only thing I can think of.


----------



## seavixen

As ridiculous as this sounds, I'm sad that my husband is out of town on business all day. Yes - all day. Not for a couple of days, not for a week, not even over night - just all day.

I'm used to him being right down the street, and seeing him over his lunch break. All day with mileage in between us feels weird...


----------



## Mathias

I didn't get the job I wanted.


----------



## That Guy You Met Once

On top of all of that, she wants to lose the weight now.


----------



## That Guy You Met Once

Turns out it's only about 30 lbs., which is fine. Nowhere near as "bad" as my last GF, or the other people I've dated who all wanted to lose some ridiculous amount.

On the other hand, my roommate posted a Facebook update about how worthless I am. Yay.


----------



## nugget34

Your not worthless, look at the positives, by your words your quite proficient at masturbating.


----------



## Surlysomething

fruitfly in my coffee




haha


----------



## imfree

Surlysomething said:


> fruitfly in my coffee
> 
> 
> 
> 
> haha



Fruitflies in my coffee, fruitflies in my coffee, you're so...


*Hope you enjoyed my bit of morning creative insanity.:doh:


----------



## Blackjack

A good friend of mine is about to be homeless. I've offered her a place to stay, but it's not looking likely to work out because she needs to be somewhere there's public transportation, and this is a suburban area with almost none- and none of it close to here.

And in telling her about that, I ruined one of the first really great days she's had in a while.

Fuck.


----------



## largenlovely

A little frustrated...my hip replacement got rid of almost all my pain but the doc said I would probably have to take one of my meds for the rest of my life to stop the nerve pain that runs down my leg. So I take it and it works but I've been having issues with my hamstring on that side and I'm having to stretch it continually right now to work it out. Kinda worried that it will also be something I have to worry with for forever. 

I suppose stretching it every day is a small price to pay in relation to the amount of pain I had previously been dealing with before the hip replacement but it's still frustrating.


----------



## That Guy You Met Once

It looks like it's not going to work out. She just told me that she can't move out for another two years - so she'll still be living with her restrictive family - then she's immediately planning on going to an out-of-town college for 4 years after that, and since she'll be living in the dorms, I can't come.


----------



## Lamia

My mom is an MRDD parent and she was at the house watching tv and one of her girls gasped behind her. When she asked her what was wrong she said "Medicare is my life". The news was discussing medicare cuts. She asked my mom what was going to happen how she was going to get "my tape, my tubes (feeding tubes),medicine"?

It makes me so sad that she is worrying about this or anyone who is dependant on benefits is worrying about how they are going to survive.


----------



## Mathias

This time last year I'd be starting to get ready to go back to college. I'm having a hard time dealing with it. Seeing my friends have countdowns and saying how they can't wait to see everyone, not to mention I've been getting calls and texts from them saying how much they miss me and how it won't be the same without me there hit me pretty hard tonight. :really sad:


----------



## ODFFA

I'll _try_ not to make this too long, but I just need to get some stuff out...

A good friend of mine just showed me something very simple, but absolutely beautiful that he once wrote to the girl he loves. I'm used to experiencing a slight little pang at reading something like that when I'm in a fallow season romantically. But I'm not used to how I feel right now and with other very happy things going on around me, I'm quite surprised by how sad this literally made me. 

I've really never been one for doing the whole self-deprecating 'why haven't I ever received words similar to these' kind of nonsense, but that's the feeling, and for right now, I might just need to let it be. :'(


----------



## Hozay J Garseeya

It makes me a little sad to think that I may not be as interesting to other people as I thought. I may be boring to talk to, and that worries me a little bit. 

I just want to be open with people and want them to reciprocate that. 

Fuck you life. Eat my chrum!


----------



## TwilightStarr

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> It makes me a little sad to think that I may not be as interesting to other people as I thought. I may be boring to talk to, and that worries me a little bit.
> 
> I just want to be open with people and want them to reciprocate that.
> 
> Fuck you life. Eat my chrum!



Maybe you are too interesting and some people's minds just can't handle your amount of awesome!


----------



## Librarygirl

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> It makes me a little sad to think that I may not be as interesting to other people as I thought. I may be boring to talk to, and that worries me a little bit.
> 
> I just want to be open with people and want them to reciprocate that.
> 
> Fuck you life. Eat my chrum!



Don't think that! More people ought to try being so open, honest and enthusiastic! I may not have talked to you in person, but the way you write and the posts you put up are very engaging. My recent experience is that people who make you feel boring can often be people who are incredibly self-centred i.e. NO ONE is that interesting to them as they only like it if they are talking about themselves. THEY are the ones that make conversation dull as you might as well talk to a brick wall for all the interest you get back, lol!


----------



## Diana_Prince245

Too often, I think I just f*** the guys I should date and date the guys I should just f***.


----------



## Lovelyone

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> It makes me a little sad to think that I may not be as interesting to other people as I thought. I may be boring to talk to, and that worries me a little bit.
> 
> I just want to be open with people and want them to reciprocate that.
> 
> Fuck you life. Eat my chrum!



I've often had this same thought about myself. Grab an oar, we can row the boat together.


----------



## moore2me

ODFFA said:


> I'll _try_ not to make this too long, but I just need to get some stuff out...
> 
> A good friend of mine just showed me something very simple, but absolutely beautiful that he once wrote to the girl he loves. I'm used to experiencing a slight little pang at reading something like that when I'm in a fallow season romantically. But I'm not used to how I feel right now and with other very happy things going on around me, I'm quite surprised by how sad this literally made me.
> 
> I've really never been one for doing the whole self-deprecating 'why haven't I ever received words similar to these' kind of nonsense, but that's the feeling, and for right now, I might just need to let it be. :'(



Dear ODFFA, First I would like to say hello to you - a more recent member. You are also one of the first persons I have talked to from Capetown, South Africa. This is a "red letter" day in my event calendar.

Your friend who writes beautiful & romantic poetry or prose must be a gifted young man. The number of males who can write romantic poetry that will bring tears to women's eyes or make us heartsick are few and far between. And the number of men who will actually write such things down and show them to the world or their friends are even fewer in number. So your young poet must be special indeed. I understand he is not after your affections, but he has chosen to share his intimate thoughts with you as a friend.

Regarding your "fallow" time romantically - finding a guy like this poet is not likely. I have been married for over 30 years and the best my husband can come up with a limerick when he has had a few beers. That doesn't mean he isn't a good man - he is just a typical man. When he needs to give me poetry, he goes to Hallmark and buys a card with hearts or sometimes strange little animals on it where the sentiment is already written. In short, he pays someone else to write the mushy stuff. On the other hand, he shows his affection and true heart by his actions and has been consistently sweet and stable day after day since I met him (except during deer season when all men in the southern US temporarily lose their minds).

So in summary, most men just cannot or will not write the kind of love letter you viewed. I think that they would have been the object of humiliation among the boys in the locker room if they were caught writing touchy feely stuff as teenagers. But don't cull a good man because he can't write like your friend can. When we go back an study the famous male writers in history that are considered romantics, names like Shelley, Byron, King David, King Solomon, and Shakespeare come to my mind. I also consider song writers like Barry Manilow and Barry White their contemporary equals. But, as I said before these great wordsmiths are few and far between - these rest of us just buy their works and enjoy them on TV or DVD (or write your own and give them to the man of your dreams).

P.S. You also might encourage your writer friend to publish his work and advise him to save his writings in a collection for posterity.


----------



## Jeeshcristina

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> It makes me a little sad to think that I may not be as interesting to other people as I thought. I may be boring to talk to, and that worries me a little bit.
> 
> I just want to be open with people and want them to reciprocate that.
> 
> Fuck you life. Eat my chrum!



I think about all the good, interesting, lovely people I know. You are within the top five, easily. 

I demand you realize how truly badass you are, mister. Not taking no for an answer.


----------



## balletguy

So I was all set to go to Texas for work on Tuesday, now because of other work issues, I can not go. I was looking forward to getting out of my heel of an office for a few days. I have a new boss and she is kind of a freak, and is not the biggest fan of me. O well like goes on.


----------



## Hozay J Garseeya

TwilightStarr said:


> Maybe you are too interesting and some people's minds just can't handle your amount of awesome!





Librarygirl said:


> Don't think that! More people ought to try being so open, honest and enthusiastic! I may not have talked to you in person, but the way you write and the posts you put up are very engaging. My recent experience is that people who make you feel boring can often be people who are incredibly self-centred i.e. NO ONE is that interesting to them as they only like it if they are talking about themselves. THEY are the ones that make conversation dull as you might as well talk to a brick wall for all the interest you get back, lol!





Lovelyone said:


> I've often had this same thought about myself. Grab an oar, we can row the boat together.





Jeeshcristina said:


> I think about all the good, interesting, lovely people I know. You are within the top five, easily.
> 
> I demand you realize how truly badass you are, mister. Not taking no for an answer.



thanks ladies, all very kind words. You guys make a lonely man feel loads better.

(I love that it was all women that replied. I still got it :happy


----------



## balletguy

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> thanks ladies, all very kind words. You guys make a lonely man feel loads better.
> 
> (I love that it was all women that replied. I still got it :happy



You look like a cool guy to throw down a few beers with. Chin up my friend.


----------



## Lovelyone

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> thanks ladies, all very kind words. You guys make a lonely man feel loads better.
> 
> (I love that it was all women that replied. I still got it :happy



The trouble with "still having it" is that at my age I may have it but I forget where I put it.


----------



## CastingPearls

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> It makes me a little sad to think that I may not be as interesting to other people as I thought. I may be boring to talk to, and that worries me a little bit.
> 
> I just want to be open with people and want them to reciprocate that.
> 
> Fuck you life. Eat my chrum!


Oh screw that crap. So many people love you to death. The ones who find you boring can pound sand. Your bitches adore you. Of course you still got it. Dope.

If you weren't on the other side of the freakin planet, I'd hang out with you in RL and I'm really choosy.


----------



## Mathias

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> It makes me a little sad to think that I may not be as interesting to other people as I thought. I may be boring to talk to, and that worries me a little bit.
> 
> I just want to be open with people and want them to reciprocate that.
> 
> Fuck you life. Eat my chrum!



You rock man! Don't let anyone get you down!


----------



## CastingPearls

moore2me said:


> Dear ODFFA, First I would like to say hello to you - a more recent member. You are also one of the first persons I have talked to from Capetown, South Africa. This is a "red letter" day in my event calendar.
> 
> Your friend who writes beautiful & romantic poetry or prose must be a gifted young man. The number of males who can write romantic poetry that will bring tears to women's eyes or make us heartsick are few and far between. And the number of men who will actually write such things down and show them to the world or their friends are even fewer in number. So your young poet must be special indeed. I understand he is not after your affections, but he has chosen to share his intimate thoughts with you as a friend.
> 
> Regarding your "fallow" time romantically - finding a guy like this poet is not likely. I have been married for over 30 years and the best my husband can come up with a limerick when he has had a few beers. That doesn't mean he isn't a good man - he is just a typical man. When he needs to give me poetry, he goes to Hallmark and buys a card with hearts or sometimes strange little animals on it where the sentiment is already written. In short, he pays someone else to write the mushy stuff. On the other hand, he shows his affection and true heart by his actions and has been consistently sweet and stable day after day since I met him (except during deer season when all men in the southern US temporarily lose their minds).
> 
> So in summary, most men just cannot or will not write the kind of love letter you viewed. I think that they would have been the object of humiliation among the boys in the locker room if they were caught writing touchy feely stuff as teenagers. But don't cull a good man because he can't write like your friend can. When we go back an study the famous male writers in history that are considered romantics, names like Shelley, Byron, King David, King Solomon, and Shakespeare come to my mind. I also consider song writers like Barry Manilow and Barry White their contemporary equals. But, as I said before these great wordsmiths are few and far between - these rest of us just buy their works and enjoy them on TV or DVD (or write your own and give them to the man of your dreams).
> 
> P.S. You also might encourage your writer friend to publish his work and advise him to save his writings in a collection for posterity.


I used to write love letters and I swore that they were the kiss of death to my relationships, all of them--in fact, the most popular of my blog posts is called The Love Letters of Doooooom. I decided to stop because I felt they were jinxes. Then I broke my own rule and it happened again, sealing my belief that either they're a jinx or I need to improve my taste in men. 

I've always written poetry and even fairy tales and essays and odes and have written some for objects of my affection and sometimes they loved it, sometimes they hated it. I found that writing was really cathartic for me, to process heartache and confusion and the truth was multi-faceted.

I longed for someone to write something for me. I knew that so many men were not as creative with words but I was mostly attracted to types who were. I asked my ex-husband while we were married, when he asked me what I'd like for my birthday, for a love letter. He outright said no. I never had one and to this day, still don't. And although I said I'd never write them again, I did, again and again with hope. But, also because at the same time, I wanted them to know how I felt, even if I ran the risk of them not reciprocating their feelings, nevermind a written expression of them. 

I loved someone who wrote music and I asked him for a song. He said he wrote it, and then he stopped talking to me so out there, somewhere, there may be a song, named after me, and about me (or maybe he lied, I thought I knew the man, clearly I was wrong) but I know at this point I'll never hear it, and now, finally, I'm okay with it. 

I use the written word to express myself. This isn't going to stop. My heart may break in the process because I put myself out there but I'll keep taking the risk; it's part of my emotional makeup. Yes, one day, I'd like a love letter, a song, a poem, from someone who loves me, and it may never happen. And that's okay too.


----------



## penguin

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> It makes me a little sad to think that I may not be as interesting to other people as I thought. I may be boring to talk to, and that worries me a little bit.
> 
> I just want to be open with people and want them to reciprocate that.
> 
> Fuck you life. Eat my chrum!



I often think like that, too. You are very very awesome and you certainly don't bore me 

I'm sad because I miss my daughter. Even though I'm loving the break (she's with her father for most of the week), I miss her. I'm not used to having so much alone time, so I'm feeling pretty lonely today.


----------



## ODFFA

moore2me said:


> Dear ODFFA, First I would like to say hello to you - a more recent member. You are also one of the first persons I have talked to from Capetown, South Africa. This is a "red letter" day in my event calendar.
> 
> Your friend who writes beautiful & romantic poetry or prose must be a gifted young man. The number of males who can write romantic poetry that will bring tears to women's eyes or make us heartsick are few and far between. And the number of men who will actually write such things down and show them to the world or their friends are even fewer in number. So your young poet must be special indeed. I understand he is not after your affections, but he has chosen to share his intimate thoughts with you as a friend.
> 
> Regarding your "fallow" time romantically - finding a guy like this poet is not likely. I have been married for over 30 years and the best my husband can come up with a limerick when he has had a few beers. That doesn't mean he isn't a good man - he is just a typical man. When he needs to give me poetry, he goes to Hallmark and buys a card with hearts or sometimes strange little animals on it where the sentiment is already written. In short, he pays someone else to write the mushy stuff. On the other hand, he shows his affection and true heart by his actions and has been consistently sweet and stable day after day since I met him (except during deer season when all men in the southern US temporarily lose their minds).
> 
> So in summary, most men just cannot or will not write the kind of love letter you viewed. I think that they would have been the object of humiliation among the boys in the locker room if they were caught writing touchy feely stuff as teenagers. But don't cull a good man because he can't write like your friend can. When we go back an study the famous male writers in history that are considered romantics, names like Shelley, Byron, King David, King Solomon, and Shakespeare come to my mind. I also consider song writers like Barry Manilow and Barry White their contemporary equals. But, as I said before these great wordsmiths are few and far between - these rest of us just buy their works and enjoy them on TV or DVD (or write your own and give them to the man of your dreams).
> 
> P.S. You also might encourage your writer friend to publish his work and advise him to save his writings in a collection for posterity.



Hi moore2me! Thank you so much for writing this reply  I know exactly what you mean and I agree with you totally. Always expecting grand gestures across the board is a bit unfair, regardless of gender. That's not really what I was getting at though. The letter my friend showed me was very, very simple. I mean, it was pretty much a note! It's not amazing poetry or prose, or even a grand, lavish romantic gesture. 

I was struck by just the genuineness it had and the mere fact that he had written it. And even so, I'm not saying I wish I could receive a letter specifically. It literally just comes down to hearing from a man, in whatever way, with or without words, that he cares about me. To be honest, the sadness probably just stemmed from having been in a drawn out, one-sided, unrequited relationship where affection was concerned.

Hope that makes a bit more sense. I know I said it was beautiful, but I meant the mere fact that he expressed affection. It made me feel that void just a little more vividly, that's all. I honestly do appreciate your post though! :happy:


----------



## Librarygirl

ODFFA said:


> Hi moore2me! Thank you so much for writing this reply  I know exactly what you mean and I agree with you totally. Always expecting grand gestures across the board is a bit unfair, regardless of gender. That's not really what I was getting at though. The letter my friend showed me was very, very simple. I mean, it was pretty much a note! It's not amazing poetry or prose, or even a grand, lavish romantic gesture.
> 
> I was struck by just the genuineness it had and the mere fact that he had written it. And even so, I'm not saying I wish I could receive a letter specifically. It literally just comes down to hearing from a man, in whatever way, with or without words, that he cares about me. To be honest, the sadness probably just stemmed from having been in a drawn out, one-sided, unrequited relationship where affection was concerned.
> 
> Hope that makes a bit more sense. I know I said it was beautiful, but I meant the mere fact that he expressed affection. It made me feel that void just a little more vividly, that's all. I honestly do appreciate your post though! :happy:



I think I know what you mean. Having also been in a drawn-out unrequited relationship, I sometimes feel really sad at similar things. Just to have someone show you, in words or whatever, that they feel the same. That they treasure you too and want to make you happy. That they think of the little things and you can be sure of their always being there. That it is a wonderful two-way thing, instead of pouring your love into a black hole and feeling more and more drained by always making the effort.

In my case, I miss the person I THOUGHT he was. I suppose at least your friend shows that this is not an unrealistic hope.

Take care,
M


----------



## largenlovely

This must be the day for these types of discussions. Me and a friend were discussing whether or not we thought there is only one person who is "the" one or if there are a bunch of "the" ones.

There is a friend I've known since college and we clicked to the point that the entire rest of the world was shut out when we were together. we attempted sex at one point and it was disastrous. He's engaged to be married now...but when we get together, that chemistry is still there and as strong as ever. 

I'm not secretly wishing that me and him could develop something. He's about to be married and I'm very happy for them but I have never clicked with another person like *that* before. I'm just hoping there are more "the" ones out there. If not, then I missed the boat.


----------



## Rojodi

My wife discovered a lump in her breast Sunday. She has had precancerous cells removed from the same breast three years ago. Panicked, she came to me. I felt it and it was squishy, which is a good sign. She went online to see what some med sites had to say. She came up screaming at me.

"They called me old!" With women getting old, in their 40s and 50s, cysts may occur, especially as they approach menopause, which she is currently flashing. She went from sheer panic to rightful anger in less than 10 minutes. Yesterday, she called her gyno who told her it was more than likely a cyst, but come in before going to yoga. It is just a cyst.

I feel sad for those women who do not have the advantages of good medical care and medical insurance, whose only care is being attacked by Conservatives for a few more votes.


----------



## Mathias

The episode of South Park where Kenny dies for good has me bawling every time.


----------



## moore2me

Mathias said:


> The episode of South Park where Kenny dies for good has me bawling every time.



Mathias, I consider crying over the death of cartoon characters normal behavior. I have wept many a tear over Bambi folks dying and came close when Spirit, Stallion of the Cimmarons girlfriend (horse) almost bought the farm.


----------



## thatpumpkin

It makes me sad that I've been loosing friends because they're willing to budge on their morals and I'm not.


----------



## yoopergirl

I realized this evening how long it's been since I've had physical contact (more than a handshake) with someone outside my family...I'm not a big touchy-feely person except with those I'm close to, but I don't even have any good friends around to get a hug from...guess I'm just lonely, and tired of working 2-4 jobs just to come home to an empty apt.


----------



## moore2me

yoopergirl said:


> I realized this evening how long it's been since I've had physical contact (more than a handshake) with someone outside my family...I'm not a big touchy-feely person except with those I'm close to, but I don't even have any good friends around to get a hug from...guess I'm just lonely, and tired of working 2-4 jobs just to come home to an empty apt.



Dear Yooper Girl, 

I understand your need for close physical contact. It's something all humans crave from infancy and it doesn't go away just because we get older. How about turning your situation around and targeting a group of folks who also do not get enough hugs? People in nursing homes are often discarded by society and may need comfort that they never get. You can join another group or church working in a nursing home or you can start your own group. Alsom there are volunteers in my area who go into hospitals and rock babies that are neglected by their mothers and fathers (or do not have parents nearby).


----------



## Diana_Prince245

moore2me said:


> Dear Yooper Girl,
> 
> I understand your need for close physical contact. It's something all humans crave from infancy and it doesn't go away just because we get older. How about turning your situation around and targeting a group of folks who also do not get enough hugs? People in nursing homes are often discarded by society and may need comfort that they never get. You can join another group or church working in a nursing home or you can start your own group. Alsom there are volunteers in my area who go into hospitals and rock babies that are neglected by their mothers and fathers (or do not have parents nearby).



Also, and this depends on how comfortable you are around dying people, hospices are always looking for volunteers. It gives you a chance to comfort the patient and their families. I loved it.


----------



## Donna

This story about a very sick dog. Warning before clicking the link...the pictures and story are graphic and very upsetting if you are sensitive to this kind of thing. When my SPCA friend sent me the story yesterday via email, she didn't warn me about the pictures and I lost my lunch after opening the attachments.

No update on her condition today when I called. I'm praying for little Bella's recovery. I really hope there is a special extra torturous place in hell for people who neglect/abuse animals or children.


----------



## Lamia

largenlovely said:


> This must be the day for these types of discussions. Me and a friend were discussing whether or not we thought there is only one person who is "the" one or if there are a bunch of "the" ones.
> 
> There is a friend I've known since college and we clicked to the point that the entire rest of the world was shut out when we were together. we attempted sex at one point and it was disastrous. He's engaged to be married now...but when we get together, that chemistry is still there and as strong as ever.
> 
> I'm not secretly wishing that me and him could develop something. He's about to be married and I'm very happy for them but I have never clicked with another person like *that* before. I'm just hoping there are more "the" ones out there. If not, then I missed the boat.



Perhaps this person is a kindred spirit and since he was male you both misconstrued the feeling as attraction. Intense emotional bonds and connection don't always have to be relationships.  I hope that made sense.


----------



## cinnamitch

Donna said:


> This story about a very sick dog. Warning before clicking the link...the pictures and story are graphic and very upsetting if you are sensitive to this kind of thing. When my SPCA friend sent me the story yesterday via email, she didn't warn me about the pictures and I lost my lunch after opening the attachments.
> 
> No update on her condition today when I called. I'm praying for little Bella's recovery. I really hope there is a special extra torturous place in hell for people who neglect/abuse animals or children.



If you find out something please let me know.


----------



## CastingPearls

largenlovely said:


> This must be the day for these types of discussions. Me and a friend were discussing whether or not we thought there is only one person who is "the" one or if there are a bunch of "the" ones.
> 
> There is a friend I've known since college and we clicked to the point that the entire rest of the world was shut out when we were together. we attempted sex at one point and it was disastrous. He's engaged to be married now...but when we get together, that chemistry is still there and as strong as ever.
> 
> I'm not secretly wishing that me and him could develop something. He's about to be married and I'm very happy for them but I have never clicked with another person like *that* before. I'm just hoping there are more "the" ones out there. If not, then I missed the boat.





Lamia said:


> Perhaps this person is a kindred spirit and since he was male you both misconstrued the feeling as attraction. Intense emotional bonds and connection don't always have to be relationships.  I hope that made sense.



I agree with Lamia. He may be a soul mate that was meant to be part of your life for a period of time or to experience something together, so that bond may always be there. The good news is that we have several and, some, many soul mates, so when it ends, or transforms into something else, you can still be thankful for what was, while still being open to the possibility of what's down the road because you will have that bond again. I do believe that there is someone special for you, a partner, whether for life or not, is up to you.


----------



## TwilightStarr

That a good friend of mine from high school died last night in a car wreck 
I've lost a lot of friends from school in the past couple of years and it shouldn't be like that!


----------



## imfree

TwilightStarr said:


> That a good friend of mine from high school died last night in a car wreck
> I've lost a lot of friends from school in the past couple of years and it shouldn't be like that!



You have my condolences in your loss.


----------



## Surlysomething

TwilightStarr said:


> That a good friend of mine from high school died last night in a car wreck
> I've lost a lot of friends from school in the past couple of years and it shouldn't be like that!



I'm so sorry about your friend. We all start to lose people when we leave school...it's scary. Big hugs your way.


----------



## TwilightStarr

imfree said:


> You have my condolences in your loss.





Surlysomething said:


> I'm so sorry about your friend. We all start to lose people when we leave school...it's scary. Big hugs your way.



Thank you


----------



## Ho Ho Tai

yoopergirl said:


> I realized this evening how long it's been since I've had physical contact (more than a handshake) with someone outside my family...I'm not a big touchy-feely person except with those I'm close to, but I don't even have any good friends around to get a hug from...guess I'm just lonely, and tired of working 2-4 jobs just to come home to an empty apt.



Mrs Ho Ho and I are full time 24/7 touchie-feelie-huggie folks. We never lack for touch. And yet . . .

I have been having back problems for weeks (and am seeking treatment). Yesterday, our housekeeper came over and, noting my pain, offered to give me a back rub (she is into Swedish massage). While our relationship is circumspect, we have become friends as well as employers. I wasn't quite sure if back rubs fit into this, but went ahead. I expected five minutes but she wouldn't let up for a full hour. I felt like a happy Velveteen Rabbit in danger of being loved until the fur wore off!

If I weren't in a very full and loving relationship, my emotions could have taken a different turn. Love and gentle (or firm!) touch go, literally, hand-in-hand. The skin, the psyche, and the deep, deep soul just suck it all up, like spring rains on a dry field.

Realizing that the experience is, in a way, synthetic and temporary, I would suggest seeking out a good, legit. masseuse in your area, trying out at least the introductory session (see my rep message). It may relieve some of the craving and leave you more prepared to accept love and partnership when it comes along (as it surely will).

Oh - an if you want to hasten things a bit, learn how to cook really good pasties.


----------



## kaylaisamachine

Still no apartment. School starts in 16 days. I will be homeless. I'm not giving up on school.


----------



## Sweetie

I'm feeling sad because I was RIGHT about someone. I gave an ex a second chance and the first chance he got to be a cheat he took it. This time isn't as painful because I didnt really let down my walls. I've been kind of braced for this all along.


----------



## largenlovely

CastingPearls said:


> I agree with Lamia. He may be a soul mate that was meant to be part of your life for a period of time or to experience something together, so that bond may always be there. The good news is that we have several and, some, many soul mates, so when it ends, or transforms into something else, you can still be thankful for what was, while still being open to the possibility of what's down the road because you will have that bond again. I do believe that there is someone special for you, a partner, whether for life or not, is up to you.



I'm not able to double quote on my phone app, so I'm including u as well Lamia 

I like to think there's more than one. I have a girlfriend who I'm close with and I think we're soul sisters. So I suppose it has happened more than once, technically. I sure hope next time it happens with a man, that the sexual stuff is there. That was soooo frustrating that it didn't work because I really wanted it to...but we can't force it, no matter how hard we try (and I tried hard lol) Which, we were able to joke about how horrible the experience was afterwards lol..so I suppose at least it was cool that we were able to do that lol


----------



## largenlovely

I went out with a very good looking guy friend of mine last night club hopping. He didn't notice (or he would've probably hit somebody) but some people were whispering, staring and laughing with their friends. I am always super aware of my surroundings is why I noticed it (and I hadn't been drinking either). It was as if they were shocked and amused that he would be seen with me in public. It's not the first time it has happened...it has happened to us all. I guess I just forgot cuz I haven't really went downtown in a long time where most of the superficial assholes hang out to party.

It was really disheartening 

Just to add...we went to one club where he was friends with the owner and the guy kept asking if we were going home together in a shocked manner. It was horrible


----------



## Sweetie

largenlovely said:


> I went out with a very good looking guy friend of mine last night club hopping. He didn't notice (or he would've probably hit somebody) but some people were whispering, staring and laughing with their friends. I am always super aware of my surroundings is why I noticed it (and I hadn't been drinking either). It was as if they were shocked and amused that he would be seen with me in public. It's not the first time it has happened...it has happened to us all. I guess I just forgot cuz I haven't really went downtown in a long time where most of the superficial assholes hang out to party.
> 
> It was really disheartening




I'm sorry this happened. I know how it feels and it SUCKS.  

BTW, they were probably being eaten alive with JEALOUSY. :

Here are some {{{{{HUGS}}}}}


----------



## largenlovely

Sweetie said:


> I'm sorry this happened. I know how it feels and it SUCKS.
> 
> Here are some {{{{{HUGS}}}}}



Thanks..I know all you girls here understand how crappy it makes ya feel. I'm so glad he didn't notice it though because that would've made it worse


----------



## Sweetie

largenlovely said:


> Thanks..I know all you girls here understand how crappy it makes ya feel. I'm so glad he didn't notice it though because that would've made it worse



He was with you because he sees what an AWESOME person you are.


----------



## largenlovely

Sweetie said:


> He was with you because he sees what an AWESOME person you are.



Thanks 

He would've got pissed off and defended me, which makes him pretty awesome too. I'm sure glad it didn't come to that though.


----------



## seavixen

largenlovely said:


> I went out with a very good looking guy friend of mine last night club hopping. He didn't notice (or he would've probably hit somebody) but some people were whispering, staring and laughing with their friends. I am always super aware of my surroundings is why I noticed it (and I hadn't been drinking either). It was as if they were shocked and amused that he would be seen with me in public. It's not the first time it has happened...it has happened to us all. I guess I just forgot cuz I haven't really went downtown in a long time where most of the superficial assholes hang out to party.
> 
> It was really disheartening
> 
> Just to add...we went to one club where he was friends with the owner and the guy kept asking if we were going home together in a shocked manner. It was horrible



I completely don't get that narrow-minded BS - especially since, seriously... you're _GORGEOUS_!  I think jealousy is a likely culprit.


----------



## seavixen

I'm irked / sad / et cetera that _everything_ is going wrong again, all at once. I keep thinking it's over, and then something else happens, and then more somethings, and so on.


----------



## Linda

I miss my sister. It's been 9 years since she walked away from our family and while I understand and commend her for being corageous and doing what she needed to do to survive this life I miss her terribly.


----------



## largenlovely

seavixen said:


> I completely don't get that narrow-minded BS - especially since, seriously... you're GORGEOUS!  I think jealousy is a likely culprit.



Thanks  It would sure make me feel better if it was jealousy rather than anything else


----------



## yoopergirl

I just wanted to thank all of you who responded to my post with suggestions. While they're all excellent ideas ( I especially like the idea about spending time with the babies), my long work hours combined with the fact that I live about 45 minutes from the nearest hospital makes any of thos options difficult. And while I like the hospice idea because I understand how difficult that can be, I think it would hit a little too close to home ( I acted as one of my mother's primary caregivers during her struggle with cancer a couple of years back, and I still tend to tear up when I see terminally ill folks on television). I think I'll do a bit of looking though, and see if there are any programs in my area I could work with on the weekends I have off. Thanks again!


----------



## Librarygirl

The disappearance of an online friend, with no explanation. Someone I've known a little over a year and who always made me smile and was fun and a good listener. The last time this happened it was as his father had died. I just hope he's ok.

The reappearance of another friend who lives far away and has caused me nothing but pain and heartache. My love for him blinds me sometimes, but I know I can't get sucked in again and have to walk away. Leopards don't change their spots. Never very good at goodbyes though....


----------



## ButlerGirl09

Donna said:


> This story about a very sick dog. Warning before clicking the link...the pictures and story are graphic and very upsetting if you are sensitive to this kind of thing. When my SPCA friend sent me the story yesterday via email, she didn't warn me about the pictures and I lost my lunch after opening the attachments.
> 
> No update on her condition today when I called. I'm praying for little Bella's recovery. I really hope there is a special extra torturous place in hell for people who neglect/abuse animals or children.



Don't know if you saw the update in the story or not, but there's good news 

http://www.baynews9.com/content/news/baynews9/news/article.html/content/news/articles/bn9/2012/8/14/dog_found_stuck_to_c.html


----------



## Sweetie

I'm sad because a friend of mine just can't seem to get himself on the wagon and stay there. He's drinking himself to death.


----------



## yoopergirl

The fact that my youngest brother is getting married Sat., and I don't think I'll be attending...

He owes me an apology for some very nasty things he said after I called him out for treating other family members poorly...he has since apologized to the other family members, but not to me, even though we've seen each other on various occassions since then (including at a concert tonight)...

I was originally supposed to not only be a bridesmaid, but perform the wedding ceremony...after he got caught cheating on his fiancee (with someone who made it twice as hurtful) I told him I wasn't comfortable in either role, and haven't seen or heard an invitation to attend since then.

I'm willing to admit that I'm horrible about holding grudges - but I'm also known for letting people walk all over me, and I feel like my brother believes that since the rest of my family is attending the wedding (some of whom are going just for appearances sake), I'll just show up with my happy face on. But with everything my family has been pulling lately, I feel like this is where I need to make my stand and say "If you can't treat me with respect, then I don't need to be bothered with you."

But in all honesty, it hurts that he'd rather risk me not being there than make ammends, and Saturday's going to be a rough day for me...


----------



## largenlovely

yoopergirl said:


> But with everything my family has been pulling lately, I feel like this is where I need to make my stand and say "If you can't treat me with respect, then I don't need to be bothered with you."
> 
> But in all honesty, it hurts that he'd rather risk me not being there than make ammends, and Saturday's going to be a rough day for me...



I'm sorry you're going through this *hugs* I know all too well how hard it can be to deal with a crappy family.

Part of me wants to tell you that u should absolutely stand your ground

And part of me wants to say, is it really worth missing such an important event.

I know me though and I would be as stubborn as a mule and not go. Whichever decision you make, it's going to be difficult.


----------



## Donna

ButlerGirl09 said:


> Don't know if you saw the update in the story or not, but there's good news
> 
> http://www.baynews9.com/content/news/baynews9/news/article.html/content/news/articles/bn9/2012/8/14/dog_found_stuck_to_c.html



Thanks for the link...I hadn't seen this article. Bella has a long road to recovery, but it looks like she has a great foster family to help her along that road.


----------



## Tad

yoopergirl said:


> The fact that my youngest brother is getting married Sat., and I don't think I'll be attending...



What a cruddy situation  You'd think that, for his wedding, he'd be willing to bend a bit! Because as it is, even if you two patch things up later, you'll never have been at his wedding.

Just as an option, perhaps go to the ceremony (but get there just before time and sit at the back), and leave after that? By tradition one does not need an invite to go to the ceremony, and that way you'll have witnessed the 'key' part of the day, without really having to socialize?


----------



## Mishty

Watching Winter's Bone last night seriously struck a nerve in my heart(chest area). I've lost too many loved ones to this horrid lifestyle,and watched lovely families destroyed year by year with no signs of stopping. 

I lost a best friend and a lover to that disgusting substance. It makes hard working,country people forget their morals,and obligations....Obligations to show their children and grandchildren the ways of the land. How to plant enough on a quarter of an acre to last all Fall and Winter. How to raise a single hog or steer and make the meat last 365 days. How to go to a home and offer a pot of beans to a grieving neighbor. How to work hard and have pride. They don't teach the young how to walk with their head held high,because they've forgotten how. 

I hate to judge people. I hate looking down on someone,but when despair has replaced every aspect of someones life and they sit on the shoulders of their children until the bottom isn't even on ground level it's a mile below the dirt and rot. I can't give you the respect someone of your raising and age should be allowed. 

The local jails and pens are full of people I share blood with,people who only a few years ago had all my respect and love,and now I can't stomach to say their names. Intelligent young men and women I worked in schools with,grew up beside, and welcomed into my heart and my home, have been stolen from me by a puff of soul killing smoke,a silver,sharp,and hollow wire buried in their blood rivers. Dilated pupils,oozing scabbed skin and and jaws that don't have hinges. 

Volunteering for the local out reach programs only means children and cousins can't come to me in times of need for chance of abuse and neglect,so I don't give my time to a cause that needs my mind,and my knowledge. I want to make a difference so bad,but it's not possible in my community any longer. Not for me. I'm just fed the fuck up. 
I'm so close to begging or praying for help,closer than I've ever been


----------



## Lovelyone

The loss of a dear and precious soul.


----------



## Linda

Lovelyone said:


> The loss of a dear and precious soul.



(((((hugs))))) I am sorry for your loss.


----------



## Justkris

Gorillaz possibly breaking up.


----------



## moore2me

Justkris said:


> Gorillaz possibly breaking up.



Oh No! This is horrible news! . . . . .wait a minute . . . . . Gorillaz is a cartoon group like Josie and the Pussycats. :huh: If a cartoon group breaks up, why can't they just draw a few more characters? Or even keep drawing the old characters (just hire some different but similar voices)? :doh:


----------



## TwilightStarr

Lovelyone said:


> The loss of a dear and precious soul.



I am so sorry for your loss.


----------



## CleverBomb

Justkris said:


> Gorillaz possibly breaking up.


And this right after the recent Clint Eastwood appearance reminding people of one of their biggest hits, too.


----------



## Linda

Missing my snuggle bear.


----------



## CAMellie

I completely forgot to order my hubby's cap and gown for his graduation ceremony on the 15th. I'm gonna call the supplier on Tuesday and hope they can send it overnight or 2-day for an extra fee.


----------



## That Guy You Met Once

Justkris said:


> Gorillaz possibly breaking up.



Last I heard, Damon Albarn and Jamie Hewlett both quit several months ago. I don't think there's a "possibly" to it.

---

It may be self-centered, but I hate how few people read my shit, especially when, in some of the same places I post my work, horribly-written fanfic and teenagers who never proofread are racking up thousands of hits and tens of positive reviews. 

It doesn't help that some of my own best friends have said my stories don't interest them.


----------



## CAMellie

I am honestly sad that Michael Clarke Duncan passed away today


----------



## CastingPearls

I have so many scars and lumps from my illness that I can't even imagine how anyone will ever love my body.


----------



## penguin

CastingPearls said:


> I have so many scars and lumps from my illness that I can't even imagine how anyone will ever love my body.



Body Braille, baby. It's all part of your story, and reading it is a hands on experience that the right person will enjoy and want to read again and again.


----------



## TwilightStarr

My nephew is on his way to his first day of school :*(

I feel bad for his teacher though, he was grumpy as hell this morning.


----------



## Hozay J Garseeya

Linda said:


> Missing my snuggle bear.



I'm right here baby.


----------



## That Guy You Met Once

My first girlfriend/former best friend has decided not to move out of her shitty parents' home and get a GED.

...Because she decided she didn't feel like it. So she spent the money she was saving to start a new life on a Blu-Ray player and HDTV.

I can't even talk to her anymore. At this point, a large part of me honestly hopes I never see her again.


----------



## Tracyarts

My oldest cat (17 years) is at the end of his life. He started acting off at the end of last week, and got worse to the point where he wouldn't eat at all on Monday. We took him to the vet first thing yesterday and all they could find wrong with him was what looked like the start of an upper respiratory infection. So, they gave him an antibiotic shot and some IV fluids and nutrients, and sent us home with some liquid medicine to give him and said to keep trying to offer him turkey baby food (which was his favorite treat when he didn't have much of an appetite). But, given his age and behavior, they said that he would either start to get better fast, or start to deteriorate fast. He's not going to get better, and he's deteriorated considerably in the past 24 hours. He's at peace, just weak and sleeping a lot. The vet said there's no reason to bring him in to be put down unless things change and he seems to be in distress. Our other cats are taking turns "visiting" him and sitting with him. I'm not sure how much time he has left, but it won't be much. 

We rescued him and another cat from a very bad situation 16 years ago, he was mature but small for his age due to the poor conditions he was living in. We managed to get him as healthy as we could, and give him a good home. I know he's had a very long and happy life, but am still very sad to see him go. He was my special cat who would either curl up in the crook of my arm beside me while I was asleep, or curl up next to my pillow and knead his paws in my hair and purr me to sleep at night.


----------



## Linda

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> I'm right here baby.



 awwww



Tracyarts said:


> My oldest cat (17 years) is at the end of his life. He started acting off at the end of last week, and got worse to the point where he wouldn't eat at all on Monday. We took him to the vet first thing yesterday and all they could find wrong with him was what looked like the start of an upper respiratory infection. So, they gave him an antibiotic shot and some IV fluids and nutrients, and sent us home with some liquid medicine to give him and said to keep trying to offer him turkey baby food (which was his favorite treat when he didn't have much of an appetite). But, given his age and behavior, they said that he would either start to get better fast, or start to deteriorate fast. He's not going to get better, and he's deteriorated considerably in the past 24 hours. He's at peace, just weak and sleeping a lot. The vet said there's no reason to bring him in to be put down unless things change and he seems to be in distress. Our other cats are taking turns "visiting" him and sitting with him. I'm not sure how much time he has left, but it won't be much.
> 
> We rescued him and another cat from a very bad situation 16 years ago, he was mature but small for his age due to the poor conditions he was living in. We managed to get him as healthy as we could, and give him a good home. I know he's had a very long and happy life, but am still very sad to see him go. He was my special cat who would either curl up in the crook of my arm beside me while I was asleep, or curl up next to my pillow and knead his paws in my hair and purr me to sleep at night.



I am so sorry.


----------



## Tad

Tracyarts said:


> My oldest cat (17 years) is at the end of his life.



It is so difficult, saying good-bye. You have given a great life, but it is so hard when there is no more that you can give. Best wishes to all of you on getting through this period in the best spirits you can.


----------



## Tracyarts

My kitty (Shadow) is gone. My husband wanted some alone time with him to say goodbye tonight, and Shadow went peacefully while he was getting petted. 

I'm going to miss him so much.

Tracy


----------



## CastingPearls

Tracyarts said:


> My kitty (Shadow) is gone. My husband wanted some alone time with him to say goodbye tonight, and Shadow went peacefully while he was getting petted.
> 
> I'm going to miss him so much.
> 
> Tracy


I'm so sorry, Tracy.


----------



## Surlysomething

Tracyarts said:


> My kitty (Shadow) is gone. My husband wanted some alone time with him to say goodbye tonight, and Shadow went peacefully while he was getting petted.
> 
> I'm going to miss him so much.
> 
> Tracy



*big hug* I'm sorry. He sounded very loved.


----------



## CAMellie

I'm sad that we were not able to get my hubby's cap and gown for his commencement ceremony to receive his AA. He'll still look handsome in his slacks, dress shirt, and tie...but I really wish we hadn't forgotten to put in the order for his cap and gown in time.


----------



## moore2me

CAMellie said:


> I'm sad that we were not able to get my hubby's cap and gown for his commencement ceremony to receive his AA. He'll still look handsome in his slacks, dress shirt, and tie...but I really wish we hadn't forgotten to put in the order for his cap and gown in time.



CAMellie, 
First let me say I am glad you are doing better healthwise and are back contributing to the Forums here. 

I have some suggestions that you might want to try at the last minute (its worth a try).
1. Put an ad in Craig's list and ask for the loan, gift, or sale of a previous alumni's graduation cap & gown. It may not fit hubby exactly - but its worth a try.
2. Call the President, the Caplain, the Head of Recruitment, the Head of the Alumni Assn, and/or the Head of the Board of Directors of hubby's school and explain your plight to them and see if anyone can loan him a cap and/or gown.
3. If you hubby or his family are citizens of another country (Mexico for example) call that country's closest embassy in your state. As for the head of the embassy & explain your plight and see if they can pull some strings to obtain a cap and gown at the last minute for you. (Tell them how proud they should be of the model citizen your husband it trying to be and has become.)
4. Put and add in the student paper online today and see if someone will rent you their gown.
5. See if you can negotiate a person who is graduating an hour or two earlier or later to loan your their cap and gown just so he can use it temporarily. Offer them a fee if they need encouragement.

If I can come up with something better, I will post that too.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Tracyarts said:


> My kitty (Shadow) is gone. My husband wanted some alone time with him to say goodbye tonight, and Shadow went peacefully while he was getting petted.
> 
> I'm going to miss him so much.
> 
> Tracy



I am so sorry, Tracy.  Shadow is so lucky to have had such a wonderful life full of love with you. *Big hugs.*


----------



## Nenona

Depression.
It happens.
But the amount of racist, sexist, ableist bullshit I've been dealing with lately does not help.


It also doesn't help that I kind of need a change of pace/scenery from my crap parents and fawned-over sister who got knocked up because she didn't know how to use a condom.
Seriously, I get punished for my insomnia.
She gets rewarded for having sex with something like 30 guys and eventually managing to get pregnant via one. She already hates talking to the guy.


----------



## moore2me

Nenona said:


> Depression.
> It happens.
> But the amount of racist, sexist, ableist bullshit I've been dealing with lately does not help.
> 
> *Dear Nenona, I usually do not critize other people's parents, but I thought some of my ideas about what you said would make you feel better . . . .*
> 
> *It also doesn't help that I kind of need a change of pace/scenery from my crap parents and fawned-over sister who got knocked up because she didn't know how to use a condom*. * I don't know how condoms work in your state, but in Arkansas, rubbers usually work better at preventing pregnancy if the male partner wears them. We generally expect the user (a male) to know how the rubber works (it's not that complicated) and to provide them. (The female usually has backup rubbers handy considering the severity of the penalty the woman has to bear if the birth control protection fails.) And yes, I know there are condoms for women, but how many of you DIMMERS have used these?
> *
> *Seriously, I get punished for my insomnia.* *You have heard of Master Gardeners, haven't you? Well, Master Parents would do something like you are describing (not!). One of the best, surest, and fastest way to get any kid to nod off to a peaceful night's sleep is to punish them for not sleeping. Personally, I like the method used by Joan Crawford in Mommie Dearest when she tied her little boy's hands and legs down to the bed before he went to sleep at night.
> 
> **She gets rewarded for having sex with something like 30 guys and eventually managing to get pregnant via one. She already hates talking to the guy*.


*If you sister has had sex with about 30 guys, there is something not right with this chick. You should feel sorry for her and consider trying to help in some small way (and I understand you are the scapegoat for you family). But your sis is going down a dangerous road. Some things to consider:

1. Casting aside moral judgement, have that many different sex partners so early in life puts her at risk of sexually transmitted diseases which include herpes, papilloma virus & resultant cancers, hepatitis, HIV & AIDS, chlamydia, syphllis, gonorrhea, and veneral warts (to name a few). Some of these can also be transmitted to the fetus and some can cause birth defects. 

2. It is possible your parents are enchanted with the prospect of having a grandchild. Since you mentioned that the mother has had multiple sex partners, it is also possible that the boy (man) she has named as the father is not the father. Tests of paternity will probably need to be done. Also keep in mind that the father (when determined) may want custody of the child. A young mother with 30 sex partners may have a difficult time in family court gaining sole custody. Such a homelife situation may also be a high risk of violence for the baby and for your sister. 

Just a few things to keep in mind when dealing with your family unit. *:doh:


----------



## littlefairywren

Tracyarts said:


> My kitty (Shadow) is gone. My husband wanted some alone time with him to say goodbye tonight, and Shadow went peacefully while he was getting petted.
> 
> I'm going to miss him so much.
> 
> Tracy



I am so sorry about your kitty, Shadow, Tracy. He would have known how loved he was.


----------



## sugar and spice

Tracyarts said:


> My kitty (Shadow) is gone. My husband wanted some alone time with him to say goodbye tonight, and Shadow went peacefully while he was getting petted.
> 
> I'm going to miss him so much.
> 
> Tracy



I am so sorry about your Kitty Tracy he was very loved and I'm sure he felt that. (((HUGS)))


----------



## seavixen

My sort-of-half sister had a discussion with my dad about his finances, etc., when she visited him. Apparently, he wants me to be his executor. I'm really uncomfortable with this whole line of thinking at this point.

It's very difficult to see him losing weight rapidly, looking small and frail, etc. He talked to her about how he ate much more when I was there to cook for him, and I feel awful that I can't be up there with him. My dad has never been any kind of helpless. Bossing him around feels weird and wrong, but has become necessary.

I'm so glad he'll be staying with his sister in California soon. I hate him being alone in Montana.


----------



## penguin

I'm having an awful week. My dad's been in hospital for three or four weeks now, because of an infection in his shoulder muscle that's crept into his bones there. As a result of all the medicine and fluids, his kidney and heart aren't functioning properly. He's not in failure danger at this point, but he's 70 with a variety of health problems and it's just not good. My ex has also stopped paying child support (which I'm chasing up as much as I can through the correct channels), but I don't know when he'll start paying again. So I'm very broke, very desperately in need of clothes and to pay those bill things. With other stuff going on, I'm finding it hard to cope this week. I know it'll get better, I just hate wading through the shit to get there


----------



## Tad

Jeez, things are all piling up on you, Penguin  Best wishes for a breeze of good news to blow some of that mess out of your life, and soon!


----------



## Lamia

I found out today that a childhood friend hung himself this morning. I hadn't talked to him in 30 years or so, but I've cried most of the day anyway. He was such a nice funny guy. That's two suicides in a week around here. I am from a small rural area. I didn't know the other guy, but I have friends who were good friend with both men.


----------



## penguin

Tad said:


> Jeez, things are all piling up on you, Penguin  Best wishes for a breeze of good news to blow some of that mess out of your life, and soon!



My dad is doing better, thankfully. Turns out he's allergic to penicillin and that was causing an allergic reaction in his kidneys. His heart and liver are doing well and he's losing the fluid he'd been retaining. His kidneys aren't back to normal just yet, but they're doing better. The other stuff that's been bothering me isn't cleared up yet, but I know it'll get better eventually. I just have to keep on swimming.



Lamia said:


> I found out today that a childhood friend hung himself this morning. I hadn't talked to him in 30 years or so, but I've cried most of the day anyway. He was such a nice funny guy. That's two suicides in a week around here. I am from a small rural area. I didn't know the other guy, but I have friends who were good friend with both men.



I'm so sorry


----------



## CastingPearls

Penguin, I hope things let up soon and you get a break and I also hope that your dad is on the mend soon and there was no permanent damage. I'm severely allergic to penicillin myself.


Lamia, my deepest condolences. Hugs.


----------



## Lamia

Thanks Penguin and Pearls. 

I was looking at my grade school yearbook. There were ten kids in my class and ten kids in the class before me and behind me. Out of those 30 kids, 3 have hung themselves. Those odds are very unsettling.


----------



## WVMountainrear

My uncle's health has been declining for some time now. He's had two liver transplants and the disease he has continues to return. He and my aunt were at his local general practitioner's office a couple weeks ago when that doctor decided to tell them out of the blue that "Baltimore" wasn't telling them everything (my uncle's specialists are at John Hopkins). They made an appointment with his specialists to have a chat about some issues and to ask what in the world his general practitioner had been talking about. They learned on Friday that they only expect my uncle to have another two years at the most. This news has taken quite a toll on my family.

My mother didn't tell me until I called her on Monday. As soon as she answered the phone, I could tell something was wrong. Her biggest concern was my uncle's state of mind. Throughout the last 20 years that he's been having health problems, that's the one thing that has never waivered...he has remained one of he most positive people I know. And to hear that his spirit has suffered is the most concerning part for me too. I tried to encourage my mother that there's no expiration date printed on anyone, and the average length of time they told my uncle he would thrive when he received his first transplant was seven years. He made it almost 12 with that liver. So who's really to say? It's not something anyone really knows with any certainty- and the doctors told them that too...

Confronting your own mortality is difficult in itself...but I can understand why it's so much harder for him now. I remember when we were waiting for him to receive his first transplant...we were sitting around discussing the possibilities. There was a time doctors discussed perhaps having to transplant a piece of a healthy liver from a compatible living donor while we waited on a compatible full donor. I remember volunteering to see if I was compatible without hesitation knowing that I'd always been healthy, not much of a drinker (and I was much more "fit" then) and seeing him scoff at the idea that anyone else would potentially suffer (or even inconvenience themselves) just so he could live a little longer if it truly was his time. He ended up being called in for the transplant the next week. After his first transplant, he did incredibly well. He even volunteered at John Hopkins to counsel others who were on transplant lists about what to expect. He did things that no one imagined he would. Among them, he and my aunt had two children.  They are now 9 and 4. He had always known he likely wouldn't see them graduate from high school...but I don't know that he thought seeing them get to middle school may not be a reality. And since they've come along, I know he'd do just about anything he can to live a little longer.

My grandfather has also not taken well to the news and has been complaining of feeling ill himself. I've spoken to my Mom on the phone every evening this week, and I don't think I've gotten her to laugh once. I do think I heard her smile one time this evening. So that's progress. I'm just trying my best to be as supportive as I can to everyone...to listen...to sympathize...to cheer when I can. Other than that, there's not much that any of us can do but push ahead and hope for the best. And take every bit of enjoyment we can from every minute we have left together, however short or long that time may be.


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## BigBeautifulMe

Oh, I'm so sorry to hear about your uncle. That must be absolutely devastating. You, your uncle, and your family are all in my thoughts. *Hugs.*


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## Ho Ho Tai

LovelyLady - I am repeating the rep message I sent to you as a reminder to myself that I promised some additional information to you. I hope to get that to you in a few days.

"The topic is universal. The reactions can be devastating. The presentation is beautiful. It deserves further distribution. I wil suggest some possibilities by PM when I get a chance."


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## Scorsese86

Why is always everyone picking on me? Can't I live my life the way I want to live it?
Why is my ex acting like a total bitch all the time. She dumped me, and I am the one who should keep in touch? And the few times I actually want to talk with her, she completely ignores me? What the hell?

And dad: no. There's no way we're ever gonna have a relationship. You know you just end up hurting me. And you never cared for me or my brother, really. Suddenly you wake up and realize you're 55, and you have two adult sons? No, you did that five years ago. And ten years ago. Fool me once, etc. You never cared when we were kids, why should you care now that we're all grown-up?

More like a rant this time. It's probably just frustration because my birthday is coming up, and birthdays and New Year's Eve brings out a lot of thoughts.


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## Linda

Scorsese86 said:


> Why is always everyone picking on me? Can't I live my life the way I want to live it?
> Why is my ex acting like a total bitch all the time. She dumped me, and I am the one who should keep in touch? And the few times I actually want to talk with her, she completely ignores me? What the hell?
> 
> And dad: no. There's no way we're ever gonna have a relationship. You know you just end up hurting me. And you never cared for me or my brother, really. Suddenly you wake up and realize you're 55, and you have two adult sons? No, you did that five years ago. And ten years ago. Fool me once, etc. You never cared when we were kids, why should you care now that we're all grown-up?
> 
> More like a rant this time. It's probably just frustration because my birthday is coming up, and birthdays and New Year's Eve brings out a lot of thoughts.



No words just tight hugs.


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## CastingPearls

Scorsese86 said:


> Why is always everyone picking on me? Can't I live my life the way I want to live it?
> Why is my ex acting like a total bitch all the time. She dumped me, and I am the one who should keep in touch? And the few times I actually want to talk with her, she completely ignores me? What the hell?
> 
> And dad: no. There's no way we're ever gonna have a relationship. You know you just end up hurting me. And you never cared for me or my brother, really. Suddenly you wake up and realize you're 55, and you have two adult sons? No, you did that five years ago. And ten years ago. Fool me once, etc. You never cared when we were kids, why should you care now that we're all grown-up?
> 
> More like a rant this time. It's probably just frustration because my birthday is coming up, and birthdays and New Year's Eve brings out a lot of thoughts.


Hugs, sweetheart. Big big hugs. You know we can always talk if you want to, Ivan.


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## That Guy You Met Once

Death seems like it would be nice for about a week. But I'm pretty sure I wouldn't want to do it for an eternity.

I've been thinking a lot about this recently.


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## Scorsese86

Linda said:


> No words just tight hugs.



Thank you so much for the hugs, Linda



CastingPearls said:


> Hugs, sweetheart. Big big hugs. You know we can always talk if you want to, Ivan.



Always. My dear, dear friend.


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## Scorsese86

That Guy You Met Once said:


> Death seems like it would be nice for about a week. But I'm pretty sure I wouldn't want to do it for an eternity.
> 
> I've been thinking a lot about this recently.



I know the feeling. But listen to some sad songs, give yourself a big cry, talk with a friend perhaps. 
After all, tomorrow is another day.

Hang in there!


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## CastingPearls

That Guy You Met Once said:


> Death seems like it would be nice for about a week. But I'm pretty sure I wouldn't want to do it for an eternity.
> 
> I've been thinking a lot about this recently.


Is there any way AT ALL you can talk to a professional, even your regular doctor because suicidal ideation and fantasy is nothing to fool around with. Seriously consider it please. Please. I've lost family to suicide. You don't know how much you mean to SOMEBODY and possibly a whole bunch of somebodies.


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## seavixen

One of my best friends died suddenly yesterday, leaving behind his wife and fourteen year old son. It has yet to really sink in, but the grief in his widow's voice when she called to let us know is going to haunt me for a long, long time. She's such a strong, wonderful, capable woman - one of those people you hope never to hear sound so broken.

We went over to be with the family last night, and it was so hard. Seeing her look lost like that, murmuring that he had been scared, and there was nothing she could do - seeing their son trying to block it all out entirely.

That's the hardest part, I think. He will be missed - greatly - but it's his family that really breaks my heart.


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## Linda

seavixen said:


> One of my best friends died suddenly yesterday, leaving behind his wife and fourteen year old son. It has yet to really sink in, but the grief in his widow's voice when she called to let us know is going to haunt me for a long, long time. She's such a strong, wonderful, capable woman - one of those people you hope never to hear sound so broken.
> 
> We went over to be with the family last night, and it was so hard. Seeing her look lost like that, murmuring that he had been scared, and there was nothing she could do - seeing their son trying to block it all out entirely.
> 
> That's the hardest part, I think. He will be missed - greatly - but it's his family that really breaks my heart.



(((hugs))) I am so sorry for your loss.


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## penguin

I am so sorry


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## littlefairywren

seavixen said:


> One of my best friends died suddenly yesterday, leaving behind his wife and fourteen year old son. It has yet to really sink in, but the grief in his widow's voice when she called to let us know is going to haunt me for a long, long time. She's such a strong, wonderful, capable woman - one of those people you hope never to hear sound so broken.
> 
> We went over to be with the family last night, and it was so hard. Seeing her look lost like that, murmuring that he had been scared, and there was nothing she could do - seeing their son trying to block it all out entirely.
> 
> That's the hardest part, I think. He will be missed - greatly - but it's his family that really breaks my heart.



I am so sorry for your loss, seavixen.


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## WVMountainrear

My Dad called me a couple of hours ago to tell me that one of my uncles died. This was not the uncle who had the liver transplants that I have talked about before. This was a different one of my mother's brothers who died quite unexpectedly. Dad called me because Mom was too upset to do it. This is not an uncle I was particularly close to, but I know that I'll probably tear up when I see my Mom tomorrow...it will be my reaction to seeing her pain.


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## BigBeautifulMe

lovelylady78 said:


> My Dad called me a couple of hours ago to tell me that one of my uncles died. This was not the uncle who had the liver transplants that I have talked about before. This was a different one of my mother's brothers who died quite unexpectedly. Dad called me because Mom was too upset to do it. This is not an uncle I was particularly close to, but I know that I'll probably tear up when I see my Mom tomorrow...it will be my reaction to seeing her pain.


I'm so sorry, LL.  *hugs* Your mom and the rest of your family is in my thoughts.


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## Hubby2USBBBW

My mom passed away last week due to cancer.. Miss her so much.. :sad:


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## Ruffie

Just catching up on the thread here and want to send positive energy to you all!


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## CastingPearls

Everyone, I'm so so sorry for your losses. My deepest condolences to you and your families and I'm sending positive comforting energy and virtual hugs.


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## penguin

There's been so much loss lately. I'm so sorry, everyone. *hugs*


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## HottiMegan

I am sorry for everyone's loss. Hugs to you all.



I'm sad because one of Max's martial arts teachers just stopped working. He is such a big influence on Max and he's devastated. I suspect something seriously not good is happening in his life with the sudden departure. It makes me worry for him and sad. He loves his other instructor but this man was a special force in Max's life. To have him just completely disappear is making Max very upset. I just hope what ever the instructor is going through comes out okay. I told Max to write a letter to him and we can pass it to his other teacher to pass along to "Sir".


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## Linda

Hubby2USBBBW said:


> My mom passed away last week due to cancer.. Miss her so much.. :sad:



I am so sorry.



HottiMegan said:


> I am sorry for everyone's loss. Hugs to you all.
> 
> 
> 
> I'm sad because one of Max's martial arts teachers just stopped working. He is such a big influence on Max and he's devastated. I suspect something seriously not good is happening in his life with the sudden departure. It makes me worry for him and sad. He loves his other instructor but this man was a special force in Max's life. To have him just completely disappear is making Max very upset. I just hope what ever the instructor is going through comes out okay. I told Max to write a letter to him and we can pass it to his other teacher to pass along to "Sir".



Ugh ones of life's hard lessons to deal with. We as mom's don't want to watch our children hurting or having to deal with such a loss as this one Megan but it is good for them in a way. I know I hate it and wish I could step in for my son. It is hard to watch them sort through their confusion and pain . a letter is a good idea. I hope that helps. he may never get an answer back but writing down feelings is always a good thing and it may even help whatever the instructor is going through to know he had such a huge influence on one little boys life.


----------



## moore2me

Hubby2USBBBW said:


> My mom passed away last week due to cancer.. Miss her so much.. :sad:



Dear Hubby2USBBBW,

I sympathize with you in the death of your mom. Our mother or our father's death has got to be one of the hardest things in life to deal with. May God's angels look over you during this difficult period of loss. I know that cancer has been cruel to kill many loved ones - young and old - over the years.

I hope you have family you can talk to and spend time remembering your mom and the good times in a positive light. (I am sure she would want you guys think of her that way.) I would want my family to remember me with a smile. 

Love. M2M 

View attachment Calo Dolci The Archangel Gabriel.jpg


View attachment MP900177807.JPG


View attachment sunset.JPG


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## largenlovely

Wow, things changed quickly in a matter of a couple days...relationship over. He couldn't get past my size. We're still friends though but it sucks it couldn't work.


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## Surlysomething

I am so very sorry to hear about this. *hug*





largenlovely said:


> Wow, things changed quickly in a matter of a couple days...relationship over. He couldn't get past my size. We're still friends though but it sucks it couldn't work.


----------



## That Guy You Met Once

I tell her, honestly, that I love her, but we can't function in a relationship due to the distance and our schedules meaning we'd never be able to see each other, but I still consider her my only true friend.

She responds by giving me the silent treatment. Despite - or maybe because - I recently told her it's the most hurtful thing she can do.

Really fucking mature, asshole.


----------



## That Guy You Met Once

CastingPearls said:


> Is there any way AT ALL you can talk to a professional, even your regular doctor because suicidal ideation and fantasy is nothing to fool around with. Seriously consider it please. Please. I've lost family to suicide. You don't know how much you mean to SOMEBODY and possibly a whole bunch of somebodies.



I have before, and I probably should again. Thank you.


----------



## largenlovely

Surlysomething said:


> I am so very sorry to hear about this. *hug*



Thanks..I appreciate that


----------



## That Guy You Met Once

And that "silent treatment" thing turned out to be a misunderstanding. So I feel better.


----------



## HottiMegan

largenlovely said:


> Wow, things changed quickly in a matter of a couple days...relationship over. He couldn't get past my size. We're still friends though but it sucks it couldn't work.



What a bummer. I'm sorry it didn't work out.


----------



## largenlovely

HottiMegan said:


> What a bummer. I'm sorry it didn't work out.



Thanks...it's crazy how it went from one extreme to the other but whatta ya do.


----------



## Ruffie

My husband was hit while he was biking by a car who cut him off by turning in front of him (even though he had the right of way through an intersection) and caught his front tire-a hit and run. He is okay other than a concussion, broken nose, chipped front teeth and bruising and scrapes. We are monitoring a little blood in the urine for possible kidney damage with further urine tests this week. It could have been much worse but this was just one more thing in my crappy year! Especially if our insurance will not cover the medical expenses and rehab because it was after all not a motor vehicle he was in when the accident occurred but a petal bike. I know that it cost over a couple of thousand for my rehab this year after hitting the deer that they paid on my behalf and that was without a ambulance ride. So I am also concerned about how with me working part time we come up with that extra money. Anyway just going to have to pray the girl is caught, he heals well and that the universe provides for us. Thanks for letting me vent.


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## Surlysomething

Good lord, woman. I want this year to be over FOR you.
So sorry this happened to your husband, people are assholes.


Take care, ok?





Ruffie said:


> My husband was hit while he was biking by a car who cut him off by turning in front of him (even though he had the right of way through an intersection) and caught his front tire-a hit and run. He is okay other than a concussion, broken nose, chipped front teeth and bruising and scrapes. We are monitoring a little blood in the urine for possible kidney damage with further urine tests this week. It could have been much worse but this was just one more thing in my crappy year! Especially if our insurance will not cover the medical expenses and rehab because it was after all not a motor vehicle he was in when the accident occurred but a petal bike. I know that it cost over a couple of thousand for my rehab this year after hitting the deer that they paid on my behalf and that was without a ambulance ride. So I am also concerned about how with me working part time we come up with that extra money. Anyway just going to have to pray the girl is caught, he heals well and that the universe provides for us. Thanks for letting me vent.


----------



## largenlovely

Had my hair bleached blonde...tried to take it to a dark blonde/light brown and turned it purple/blonde/brown depending on which section of hair u look at  gonna go to Sally's tomorrow to find out what to do


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## CastingPearls

Ruffie said:


> My husband was hit while he was biking by a car who cut him off by turning in front of him (even though he had the right of way through an intersection) and caught his front tire-a hit and run. He is okay other than a concussion, broken nose, chipped front teeth and bruising and scrapes. We are monitoring a little blood in the urine for possible kidney damage with further urine tests this week. It could have been much worse but this was just one more thing in my crappy year! Especially if our insurance will not cover the medical expenses and rehab because it was after all not a motor vehicle he was in when the accident occurred but a petal bike. I know that it cost over a couple of thousand for my rehab this year after hitting the deer that they paid on my behalf and that was without a ambulance ride. So I am also concerned about how with me working part time we come up with that extra money. Anyway just going to have to pray the girl is caught, he heals well and that the universe provides for us. Thanks for letting me vent.


My god, Ruffie. You've been through so much. I hope things get better for both of you. Hugs.


----------



## kaylaisamachine

http://www.myfoxdetroit.com/story/19703451/possible-human-remains-found-in-burned-home

My cousin was found dead last night, chopped into pieces with nothing but his head in hands discovered in black garbage bags. They are still looking for the torso and the rest of his body. He had just gotten out of prison 5 months ago after being incarcerated for 14 years. He was arrested when he was 20, now dead at 34. He just messaged me a week ago talking about how he wanted to catch up and get to know me better. Before I left for class and agreed, he said I love you and I said nothing back because I was in such a hurry. I wish I had taken the time to just say those four little words back and now I can never tell him again. Nothing like the saying "live each day like it's your last". Cherish the moments while you can, don't hold grudges. Today has unleashed a flutter of different emotions. It's not fair that he didn't even get a chance to really live life and the fact that he was killed in this way is even more tragic. I didn't think this happened in real life to people, just made up stories on television on drama cop shows. Nor did I ever expect it to happen to someone in my family. I hope he didn't have to suffer. RIP Casey. I love you.


----------



## CastingPearls

kaylaisamachine said:


> http://www.myfoxdetroit.com/story/19703451/possible-human-remains-found-in-burned-home
> 
> My cousin was found dead last night, chopped into pieces with nothing but his head in hands discovered in black garbage bags. They are still looking for the torso and the rest of his body. He had just gotten out of prison 5 months ago after being incarcerated for 14 years. He was arrested when he was 20, now dead at 34. He just messaged me a week ago talking about how he wanted to catch up and get to know me better. Before I left for class and agreed, he said I love you and I said nothing back because I was in such a hurry. I wish I had taken the time to just say those four little words back and now I can never tell him again. Nothing like the saying "live each day like it's your last". Cherish the moments while you can, don't hold grudges. Today has unleashed a flutter of different emotions. It's not fair that he didn't even get a chance to really live life and the fact that he was killed in this way is even more tragic. I didn't think this happened in real life to people, just made up stories on television on drama cop shows. Nor did I ever expect it to happen to someone in my family. I hope he didn't have to suffer. RIP Casey. I love you.


Oh sweetheart, I'm so so sorry. Words are just not good enough. 

My deepest condolences to you and your family. I hope he didn't suffer either and that they find who did this and they're prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.


----------



## kaylaisamachine

CastingPearls said:


> Oh sweetheart, I'm so so sorry. Words are just not good enough.
> 
> My deepest condolences to you and your family. I hope he didn't suffer either and that they find who did this and they're prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.



I'm sorry too. :/ Thank you though for the kind words. You always say something of value to me and everyone else I am sure. Thank you for being so sweet and caring.


----------



## CleverBomb

kaylaisamachine said:


> http://www.myfoxdetroit.com/story/19703451/possible-human-remains-found-in-burned-home
> 
> My cousin was found dead last night, chopped into pieces with nothing but his head in hands discovered in black garbage bags. They are still looking for the torso and the rest of his body. He had just gotten out of prison 5 months ago after being incarcerated for 14 years. He was arrested when he was 20, now dead at 34. He just messaged me a week ago talking about how he wanted to catch up and get to know me better. Before I left for class and agreed, he said I love you and I said nothing back because I was in such a hurry. I wish I had taken the time to just say those four little words back and now I can never tell him again. Nothing like the saying "live each day like it's your last". Cherish the moments while you can, don't hold grudges. Today has unleashed a flutter of different emotions. It's not fair that he didn't even get a chance to really live life and the fact that he was killed in this way is even more tragic. I didn't think this happened in real life to people, just made up stories on television on drama cop shows. Nor did I ever expect it to happen to someone in my family. I hope he didn't have to suffer. RIP Casey. I love you.


Words fail. 

You and your family have my utmost condolences.


----------



## Surlysomething

I'm so, so very sorry to hear this. Lots of love your way, beautiful girl.







kaylaisamachine said:


> http://www.myfoxdetroit.com/story/19703451/possible-human-remains-found-in-burned-home
> 
> My cousin was found dead last night, chopped into pieces with nothing but his head in hands discovered in black garbage bags. They are still looking for the torso and the rest of his body. He had just gotten out of prison 5 months ago after being incarcerated for 14 years. He was arrested when he was 20, now dead at 34. He just messaged me a week ago talking about how he wanted to catch up and get to know me better. Before I left for class and agreed, he said I love you and I said nothing back because I was in such a hurry. I wish I had taken the time to just say those four little words back and now I can never tell him again. Nothing like the saying "live each day like it's your last". Cherish the moments while you can, don't hold grudges. Today has unleashed a flutter of different emotions. It's not fair that he didn't even get a chance to really live life and the fact that he was killed in this way is even more tragic. I didn't think this happened in real life to people, just made up stories on television on drama cop shows. Nor did I ever expect it to happen to someone in my family. I hope he didn't have to suffer. RIP Casey. I love you.


----------



## Ruffie

kaylaisamachine said:


> http://www.myfoxdetroit.com/story/19703451/possible-human-remains-found-in-burned-home
> 
> My cousin was found dead last night, chopped into pieces with nothing but his head in hands discovered in black garbage bags. They are still looking for the torso and the rest of his body. He had just gotten out of prison 5 months ago after being incarcerated for 14 years. He was arrested when he was 20, now dead at 34. He just messaged me a week ago talking about how he wanted to catch up and get to know me better. Before I left for class and agreed, he said I love you and I said nothing back because I was in such a hurry. I wish I had taken the time to just say those four little words back and now I can never tell him again. Nothing like the saying "live each day like it's your last". Cherish the moments while you can, don't hold grudges. Today has unleashed a flutter of different emotions. It's not fair that he didn't even get a chance to really live life and the fact that he was killed in this way is even more tragic. I didn't think this happened in real life to people, just made up stories on television on drama cop shows. Nor did I ever expect it to happen to someone in my family. I hope he didn't have to suffer. RIP Casey. I love you.



There is noting anyone can say except how sorry I am for your loss and to let yourself feel what you feel as you heal from this.


----------



## Ruffie

Thanks ladies for the good wishes. I too want this crap fest to end and good things to come our way. I am just so tired of having to continually cope and just want things to settle down so we can be happy. I am grateful that he was not badly hurt or killed and trying my best to just keep on keeping on.


----------



## Linda

kaylaisamachine said:


> http://www.myfoxdetroit.com/story/19703451/possible-human-remains-found-in-burned-home
> 
> My cousin was found dead last night, chopped into pieces with nothing but his head in hands discovered in black garbage bags. They are still looking for the torso and the rest of his body. He had just gotten out of prison 5 months ago after being incarcerated for 14 years. He was arrested when he was 20, now dead at 34. He just messaged me a week ago talking about how he wanted to catch up and get to know me better. Before I left for class and agreed, he said I love you and I said nothing back because I was in such a hurry. I wish I had taken the time to just say those four little words back and now I can never tell him again. Nothing like the saying "live each day like it's your last". Cherish the moments while you can, don't hold grudges. Today has unleashed a flutter of different emotions. It's not fair that he didn't even get a chance to really live life and the fact that he was killed in this way is even more tragic. I didn't think this happened in real life to people, just made up stories on television on drama cop shows. Nor did I ever expect it to happen to someone in my family. I hope he didn't have to suffer. RIP Casey. I love you.



I am so very sorry for your loss. Such a horrible tragedy. I too hope he did not suffer.


----------



## moore2me

Dear Kaylaisamachine,

The fate of your young cousin in Detroit sounded horrible. Unfortunately, I understand the future of many men is cast once they enter the prison system. He probably did not stand a chance of becoming whole again once he spent so many years of his young life in the pen. 

It was good you got a message from him before his death. But, don't despair that you should have talked to him more. It is probably best that you did not. The kind of people that killed him might have posed a danger to you as well - if nothing more than to extract revenge. He kept you safe by keeping you out of the bad that killed him. I do hope that they can find the rest of his body and that they are able to find and arrest his murder(s). It is tragic that a young man lost his future and his life in such a manner. I hope you and the others in his family can find justice for him. M2M


----------



## moore2me

Ruffie said:


> My husband was hit while he was biking by a car who cut him off by turning in front of him (even though he had the right of way through an intersection) and caught his front tire-a hit and run. He is okay other than a concussion, broken nose, chipped front teeth and bruising and scrapes. We are monitoring a little blood in the urine for possible kidney damage with further urine tests this week. It could have been much worse but this was just one more thing in my crappy year! Especially if our insurance will not cover the medical expenses and rehab because it was after all not a motor vehicle he was in when the accident occurred but a petal bike. I know that it cost over a couple of thousand for my rehab this year after hitting the deer that they paid on my behalf and that was without a ambulance ride. So I am also concerned about how with me working part time we come up with that extra money. Anyway just going to have to pray the girl is caught, he heals well and that the universe provides for us. Thanks for letting me vent.



Dear Ruffie,

You are right - you have had a crappy year. I have come to the conclusion that the longer we live, the more bad things happen to us along life's route. It should be that our older years are golden and we can take it easy and enjoy retirement - no way! We have to fight and scratch out a living even harder than when we were young - but now we don't feel like doing it - too tired and used up!!!! I came to this conclusion by watching my mom, my older relatives and how I am dealing with the pitfalls of aging.

You do have some things in common with me that you can still be thankful for (I am motivating myself too, as I write this). My husband of 30+ yrs is still alive (altho somewhat damaged). He and I have most of the essentials we need, but not everything we want. We both have some sturdy relatives of sound minds and then we both have some relatives that meet neither category. We spend way too much on health insurance, car insurance, and house insurance, but I am scared not to. I have not hit a deer, but my crazy neighbors have shot across my front yard trying to kill one or two.

I certainly hope your husband gets the rehab and treatment he needs to recover from that hit & run driver's criminal act. I also hope his kidney function returns to normal quickly. (I guess Canada's free healthcare doesn't mean free all the time?) The silver lining in what you guys and my family are going thru is that it could be a whole lot worse - 100 years ago - if that's any consolation.


----------



## Ruffie

Thank you so much for your support and words of encouragement. He was at the Doctors today and had the stitches out of his lip, checked over for healing on the road rash, bruising and concussion. The tests showed no more blood in the urine so seems he only bruised his kidneys and that will heal on its own. In Canada basic medical care is covered but elective items such as massage, physiotherapy, acupuncture and so on is an extra cost. Many medications are covered by the drug plan ( you pay dispensing fee and portion and any portion not covered) and his insurance through work will cover a portion of the costs for medications that are not. We are VERY grateful that things were not much much worse and that his injuries were fairly minimal. Has dentist appointment on the 15th to look at chipped teeth and his dentist is a childhood friend of his so we should be able to pay little by little there. 

This weekend as we gather with my daughter in laws family for Thanksgiving we will be very thankful that we do as you said have a roof over our heads, family and friends that love us and relative good health. Everything else can and will be dealt with. Keep fighting and scratching because when you do so it inspires others myself included to do the same. Sending appreciative thoughts your way!
Ruth


----------



## AuntHen

Ruffie said:


> My husband was hit while he was biking by a car who cut him off by turning in front of him (even though he had the right of way through an intersection) and caught his front tire-a hit and run. He is okay other than a concussion, broken nose, chipped front teeth and bruising and scrapes. We are monitoring a little blood in the urine for possible kidney damage with further urine tests this week. It could have been much worse but this was just one more thing in my crappy year! Especially if our insurance will not cover the medical expenses and rehab because it was after all not a motor vehicle he was in when the accident occurred but a petal bike. I know that it cost over a couple of thousand for my rehab this year after hitting the deer that they paid on my behalf and that was without a ambulance ride. So I am also concerned about how with me working part time we come up with that extra money. Anyway just going to have to pray the girl is caught, he heals well and that the universe provides for us. Thanks for letting me vent.





kaylaisamachine said:


> http://www.myfoxdetroit.com/story/19703451/possible-human-remains-found-in-burned-home
> 
> My cousin was found dead last night, chopped into pieces with nothing but his head in hands discovered in black garbage bags. They are still looking for the torso and the rest of his body. He had just gotten out of prison 5 months ago after being incarcerated for 14 years. He was arrested when he was 20, now dead at 34. He just messaged me a week ago talking about how he wanted to catch up and get to know me better. Before I left for class and agreed, he said I love you and I said nothing back because I was in such a hurry. I wish I had taken the time to just say those four little words back and now I can never tell him again. Nothing like the saying "live each day like it's your last". Cherish the moments while you can, don't hold grudges. Today has unleashed a flutter of different emotions. It's not fair that he didn't even get a chance to really live life and the fact that he was killed in this way is even more tragic. I didn't think this happened in real life to people, just made up stories on television on drama cop shows. Nor did I ever expect it to happen to someone in my family. I hope he didn't have to suffer. RIP Casey. I love you.



Prayers, hugs and my deepest condolences going out to you both!!!!!


----------



## Aust99

Tonight while walking back to my car with some friends after a delightful dinner and drinks catchup some asshole yelled something out to me about "liking my fat arse" from their car as they were driving past... My friends pretended to not have understood him or maybe they didn't but it was embarrassing none the less...


----------



## largenlovely

I seem to have acquired some leeches lately. Emotional as well as people trying to sponge off of me. I'm gonna have to lay down the law and I hate having to do that because then I'm labeled as a bitch. Why can't people respect boundaries.


----------



## ButlerGirl09

My dog is really sick and had to be admitted to the pet ICU. She's very sick and the prognosis is guarded. This dog is like my baby and I'm really worried about her. Not to mention this is another thing in a string of bad stuff for me lately. I appreciate your thoughts, prayers, and/or warm fuzzy vibes sent my way.


----------



## That Guy You Met Once

I was going to post something, but I don't even want to complain anymore after reading Kaylaisamachine's post. Oh my God, I'm so sorry.


----------



## largenlovely

kaylaisamachine said:


> http://www.myfoxdetroit.com/story/19703451/possible-human-remains-found-in-burned-home
> 
> My cousin was found dead last night, chopped into pieces with nothing but his head in hands discovered in black garbage bags. They are still looking for the torso and the rest of his body. He had just gotten out of prison 5 months ago after being incarcerated for 14 years. He was arrested when he was 20, now dead at 34. He just messaged me a week ago talking about how he wanted to catch up and get to know me better. Before I left for class and agreed, he said I love you and I said nothing back because I was in such a hurry. I wish I had taken the time to just say those four little words back and now I can never tell him again. Nothing like the saying "live each day like it's your last". Cherish the moments while you can, don't hold grudges. Today has unleashed a flutter of different emotions. It's not fair that he didn't even get a chance to really live life and the fact that he was killed in this way is even more tragic. I didn't think this happened in real life to people, just made up stories on television on drama cop shows. Nor did I ever expect it to happen to someone in my family. I hope he didn't have to suffer. RIP Casey. I love you.



Holy shit..omg, I missed this. I am so sorry!!!! My God how tragic. Oh man, I don't even know what to say except that I'm so sorry that this happened *hugs*


----------



## imfree

kaylaisamachine said:


> http://www.myfoxdetroit.com/story/19703451/possible-human-remains-found-in-burned-home
> 
> My cousin was found dead last night, chopped into pieces with nothing but his head in hands discovered in black garbage bags. They are still looking for the torso and the rest of his body. He had just gotten out of prison 5 months ago after being incarcerated for 14 years. He was arrested when he was 20, now dead at 34. He just messaged me a week ago talking about how he wanted to catch up and get to know me better. Before I left for class and agreed, he said I love you and I said nothing back because I was in such a hurry. I wish I had taken the time to just say those four little words back and now I can never tell him again. Nothing like the saying "live each day like it's your last". Cherish the moments while you can, don't hold grudges. Today has unleashed a flutter of different emotions. It's not fair that he didn't even get a chance to really live life and the fact that he was killed in this way is even more tragic. I didn't think this happened in real life to people, just made up stories on television on drama cop shows. Nor did I ever expect it to happen to someone in my family. I hope he didn't have to suffer. RIP Casey. I love you.



You and your family have my condolences, prayers, wishes for healing and peace in this sad passing.


----------



## That Guy You Met Once

Yesterday she said she loved me and no one would ever be better than me. Today she said it won't work because I don't have enough money.

Yeah, I already posted it in the singles thread, but I just can't stop thinking about it. It doesn't make sense.


----------



## CastingPearls

That Guy You Met Once said:


> Yesterday she said she loved me and no one would ever be better than me. Today she said it won't work because I don't have enough money.
> 
> Yeah, I already posted it in the singles thread, but I just can't stop thinking about it. It doesn't make sense.


Emotion and logic are two different things. She could feel very deeply for you, but realize that in the long run (or even the short run) that her needs in a relationship could not be met with you. It makes sense if you separate the two. She could still care for you and not be with you. This I've learned painfully first-hand. 

I mentioned to you in another thread that based on a number of posts you've made over some time, you could probably benefit from a few sessions with a therapist. I think everyone could, to be honest. One doesn't have to be sick to just sit down and talk with someone totally objective and trained to help. I strongly urge you to consider working on your own internal issues before embarking on a serious relationship again because you either will continue to attract the same type of women or are yourself attracted to them--indecisive and often distant. Self-sabotage is often unconscious and something a therapist or counselor might be able to help you identify and process. Best of luck to you.

I'm also very sorry that you are sad.


----------



## That Guy You Met Once

Thank you again.

I have talked to a therapist, but she didn't help. At the moment, I don't have enough money to find a new one. I tried Crisis Center, but having to explain everything to a different stranger each time I called was very alienating in the long run.


----------



## CastingPearls

That Guy You Met Once said:


> Thank you again.
> 
> I have talked to a therapist, but she didn't help. At the moment, I don't have enough money to find a new one. I tried Crisis Center, but having to explain everything to a different stranger each time I called was very alienating in the long run.


It's alienating and very discouraging. I know. It's also discouraging to not have the money and to not have a good fit with one you've tried. I'm sorry it hasn't worked out for you so far. I think if you remain open-minded, perhaps in the future an opportunity will open up for you to try again and not feel so disheartened. Truly, best of luck.


----------



## dharmabean

Heh. Simply put, not happy in this relationship. Could go in more depth, but meh for now.


----------



## Dromond

Jackie's grandson, Charley, son of Jason who died a couple of months ago, is staying with us overnight. He came in very upset. He misses his daddy and can't understand why his daddy is never coming back. His mom had to move them to a smaller place, and that upset him even more. He wants his daddy, he wants to go home, and listening to him cry over it all was just heartbreaking. He cried himself to sleep and has been sleeping ever since.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Oh god, that is so incredibly heartbreaking, Dro. The poor little guy.


----------



## Isa

That Guy You Met Once said:


> Yesterday she said she loved me and no one would ever be better than me. Today she said it won't work because I don't have enough money.
> 
> Yeah, I already posted it in the singles thread, but I just can't stop thinking about it. It doesn't make sense.





CastingPearls said:


> Emotion and logic are two different things. She could feel very deeply for you, but realize that in the long run (or even the short run) that her needs in a relationship could not be met with you. It makes sense if you separate the two. She could still care for you and not be with you. This I've learned painfully first-hand.



Exactly as CP said. While this may be painful now it probably is for the best. Take this as a lesson learned and move on. 

I am preparing to support my best friend thru what will no doubt become a brutal divorce (child involved). I only wish she had been as honest with herself way back when. She knew he was not a good match long term but felt love would win in the end. It did not and ten years later reality has won.


----------



## largenlovely

This halloween will be the 20th year since my brother died. I always start getting tense when October rolls around. This month has been extra stressful without even putting that into the equation soooo...I've spent all day crying today. 

I'm hoping I can relieve some tension after today and that maybe I'm getting it out. No matter how much time passes, I will always miss my little brother and grieve that he hasn't been around.


----------



## TwilightStarr

largenlovely said:


> This halloween will be the 20th year since my brother died. I always start getting tense when October rolls around. This month has been extra stressful without even putting that into the equation soooo...I've spent all day crying today.
> 
> I'm hoping I can relieve some tension after today and that maybe I'm getting it out. No matter how much time passes, I will always miss my little brother and grieve that he hasn't been around.



I am so sorry for your loss  
Hope you find things that your will brighten your days and help you get through this time, this year and every year.


----------



## largenlovely

TwilightStarr said:


> I am so sorry for your loss
> Hope you find things that your will brighten your days and help you get through this time, this year and every year.



Thank you ...I appreciate that. I think getting it out did help some.

20 yrs is a long time ago but when I think about it, it can still feel like it was yesterday.


----------



## moore2me

dharmabean said:


> Heh. Simply put, not happy in this relationship. Could go in more depth, but meh for now.



Good morning dharmabean, I love the new avatar - so seasonal. By now, you know that I am not too tightly wrapped but a big friend to animals. I also noticed that you mention the Dalai Lama who I am also a fan of. I appreciate his positive attitude and his religion's peaceful ways. Now - to my reason for writing this . . . .

I am pretty sure the picture next to him is not a llama. I think it is a goat. Llama's mouth's have a loopy "W" for lips. Goats lips are almost straight across with another perpendicular line going to their nose. I have included a few pixs for examples. (The top row are llamas, the second row has a llama on the left and a goat on the right. Finally, the bottom is a goat..) Now, I know I am the pot calling the kettle black, because I dress up a silly little meerkat in all kinds of weird stuff that is whimsical. So, I understand & appreciate make believe. But, I thought you would be interested in more about ungulates. 

View attachment Llama-16110.jpg


View attachment Llama-16228.jpg


View attachment Llama-16184.jpg


View attachment goat A.jpg


View attachment black-goat-in-bucket.jpg


----------



## moore2me

Dromond said:


> Jackie's grandson, Charley, son of Jason who died a couple of months ago, is staying with us overnight. He came in very upset. He misses his daddy and can't understand why his daddy is never coming back. His mom had to move them to a smaller place, and that upset him even more. He wants his daddy, he wants to go home, and listening to him cry over it all was just heartbreaking. He cried himself to sleep and has been sleeping ever since.



Dromond,

It was very touching to hear about Charley's grief over his dad. I looked up some info on grief counseling for children and am attaching it to this post. It is too long to print directly. If you cannot open it, I will try a different route - let me know. 

View attachment Dougy Grief Center For Children.zip


----------



## kaylaisamachine

That Guy You Met Once said:


> I was going to post something, but I don't even want to complain anymore after reading Kaylaisamachine's post. Oh my God, I'm so sorry.





largenlovely said:


> Holy shit..omg, I missed this. I am so sorry!!!! My God how tragic. Oh man, I don't even know what to say except that I'm so sorry that this happened *hugs*





imfree said:


> You and your family have my condolences, prayers, wishes for healing and peace in this sad passing.



Thank you. It's been a hard couple of days, not being able to be there with my family and having them all call and cry to me on the phone has just been the worst, but I just want them to find the bastard who did it and bring him to justice. I miss him. I just wish it hadn't had happened. Thank you for the kind words though. It means a lot to me.


----------



## ButlerGirl09

For those of you wondering about an update on my dog Addie (i.e. Four legged child) I finally received some relatively good news! She had a blood transfusion yesterday and seems to have responded well. Today her white blood cell count dropped significantly, which indicates that there is likely an infection that the medication has been treating. Her blood glucose levels are back in the normal range and they're going to reintroduce food this evening to see how she responds. They did a test for Addison's Disease today and should know the results from that tomorrow morning. Overall, everything appears to be treatable and hopefully she will be well and back home very soon! Thank you all for you love, support, and prayers during this stressful time.


----------



## dharmabean

moore2me said:


> I am pretty sure the picture next to him is not a llama. I think it is a goat.



It's a picture from a site called, This looks like That. It was sent to me by a friend who knows my appreciation of the Dalai Lama. It made me smile.


----------



## Twilley

on top of my plans for moving back out falling through, now I think the girl I've been kind of seeing is using me... fun


----------



## TwilightStarr

My dad is in a lose/lose/lose situation right now and there is nothing I can do about it. 
He's either going to end up dead, in the hospital, or homeless :*(


----------



## fatcharlie

largenlovely said:


> This halloween will be the 20th year since my brother died. I always start getting tense when October rolls around. This month has been extra stressful without even putting that into the equation soooo...I've spent all day crying today.
> 
> I'm hoping I can relieve some tension after today and that maybe I'm getting it out. No matter how much time passes, I will always miss my little brother and grieve that he hasn't been around.



I understand you so well. It's always such a sad felling poping up more now and then and you can't do anything about. And at the same time you don't want to be without that feeling because you will always keep him in a good memory. And I know you feel the same another 15-20 years and infact the rest of your life. It just comes and goes. 
Kram Charlie


----------



## largenlovely

fatcharlie said:


> I understand you so well. It's always such a sad felling poping up more now and then and you can't do anything about. And at the same time you don't want to be without that feeling because you will always keep him in a good memory. And I know you feel the same another 15-20 years and infact the rest of your life. It just comes and goes.
> Kram Charlie



Yes that's very true...it does come and go. I try my best to keep it under control the rest of the year but this month will always be difficult. Your heart never fully heals when you lose loved ones.


----------



## BBWbonnie

That my back is absolutely killing meeeeeeeeeeeeeeee:doh:


----------



## dharmabean

Working so many damned PT jobs, I really miss the freedom of writing. I also have a man in my life who whines and pouts when I'm not devoting 100% of my time to him; thus alleviating any free time to actually write.


----------



## Surlysomething

This shit needs to stop. 

Humans and social media at it's fucking worst. I wish I could have told this girl that it gets better as you get older. I was thinking, wow, if someone pulled even the slightest bullshit on me now like they did with her I would tear them down so hard and so fast it would make your head spin. But how does a fragile teenage ego handle so much abuse? We all watch tv, see the ads, read magazine, see the ads. These girls and boys grow up with this over-sexualized world and it's ok, but when they participate they're sluts. Something has to give. I think it starts with parents. Your kids need to be kids. Act fucking accordingly. They're not your friends. Do your job. And kids? Step away from the goddamn internet. Texting isn't a necessity.

RIP beautiful girl. I'm sorry this world dealt you so much bullshit.


----------



## dharmabean

Surlysomething said:


> This shit needs to stop.



If ONE person, just one person stood up with her, for her... 

Bullied and beat up at school, and that was video recorded? I bet it went viral throughout her peers. Where the feck was anybody to help her?  This really pisses me off. I had a friend commit suicide. I had another friend attempt suicide. 

Just ONE person to stand up and say, "Stop!" I am not talking about her teachers, or people with authority. But people in her age group. The whole band wagon mentality is sickening.


----------



## Donna

Surlysomething said:


> This shit needs to stop.
> 
> Humans and social media at it's fucking worst. I wish I could have told this girl that it gets better as you get older. I was thinking, wow, if someone pulled even the slightest bullshit on me now like they did with her I would tear them down so hard and so fast it would make your head spin. But how does a fragile teenage ego handle so much abuse? We all watch tv, see the ads, read magazine, see the ads. These girls and boys grow up with this over-sexualized world and it's ok, but when they participate they're sluts. Something has to give. I think it starts with parents. Your kids need to be kids. Act fucking accordingly. They're not your friends. Do your job. And kids? Step away from the goddamn internet. Texting isn't a necessity.
> 
> RIP beautiful girl. I'm sorry this world dealt you so much bullshit.



I am almost at a loss for words after watching her video and reading the article. I was troubled when she wrote "teachers ran over but I just went and layed in a ditch and my Dad found me." The teachers left her, bruised and bloodied for her father to find? 

I agree with Surly...this has to stop. 

God bless you, Amanda. You don't have to worry about anyone punching you or hurting you anymore.


----------



## dharmabean

I am really angry about this. I mean, REALLY angry. I keep coming back to it with further thoughts.

When my son was being bullied, we said "F*** you" to the schools, and took it up in our own hands. We found out who his bully was. We waited at the bus stop for them to get off the bus; because it usually happened on the bus and the driver didn't do shit about it. We followed her home, (yes a her, big black girl with attitude against white kids..I'm not being racist, this was one of her bully attacks against my kid.. because he's white.), and took it up with her parents.

We found out that she didn't have parents, her mom abandoned her, and she was being raised by her grandmother. The girl was just as displaced as bobby was. 

Her grandmother stepped in, and held her granddaughter accountable.

The school(s) are a joke. They're a glorified day care. They DO NOT do anything about it. Because it was on the bus, it was out of their hands. EVEN though the bus is paid for by our tax dollars, through that school district. 

The advice I would have given this girl's parents, make her press charges. Make her stand up to them. Make your daughter learn self respect again. We have to teach our kids to fight back. We have to teach our kids to stand up for themselves. 

The schools will NOT do this. Their "no tolerance" is just a nifty way of saying, "We're not going to deal with this." Someone HAS TO DEAL WITH IT, and not at the cost of more suicides. . . EVER.

I was bullied. I was called dyke (because I was in ROTC). I was called fat (because I was really curvy; big boobed /big butt). I was called slut, because I had boobs (I actually didn't sleep with a guy until I was about 17. Where as all my female classmates were screwing everyone.) I was called freak, and weird, and odd... because I had my own style. I didn't follow the crowd, or trends. I was called white trash, because I lived in foster homes. 

I survived. Because I fought back.


----------



## largenlovely

Sometimes you *have* to fight back. My sister is 9 yrs younger than me. When she was younger, a girl was bullying her on the bus. The girl had failed 2 grades and was twice my sister's size. An older bigger girl picking on a much smaller girl. My sister was around 8yrs old, this girl was 12-ish.

Me and my brother got on the elementary school bus (we were in high school). He kept the bus driver in her seat (not physically, but she was too intimidated to move) while I bellowed out the girl's name trying to find her. I found her and told her that HER picking on my sister was like ME picking on her and asked her if she wanted that to happen. Of course, I got a wide eyed head shake. My sister never ever had problems from that girl again

It's a wonder we didn't get in trouble for that. Today we probably would but it sure nipped the problem in the bud and my sister wasn't scared to ride the bus anymore.


----------



## Shosh

kaylaisamachine said:


> http://www.myfoxdetroit.com/story/19703451/possible-human-remains-found-in-burned-home
> 
> My cousin was found dead last night, chopped into pieces with nothing but his head in hands discovered in black garbage bags. They are still looking for the torso and the rest of his body. He had just gotten out of prison 5 months ago after being incarcerated for 14 years. He was arrested when he was 20, now dead at 34. He just messaged me a week ago talking about how he wanted to catch up and get to know me better. Before I left for class and agreed, he said I love you and I said nothing back because I was in such a hurry. I wish I had taken the time to just say those four little words back and now I can never tell him again. Nothing like the saying "live each day like it's your last". Cherish the moments while you can, don't hold grudges. Today has unleashed a flutter of different emotions. It's not fair that he didn't even get a chance to really live life and the fact that he was killed in this way is even more tragic. I didn't think this happened in real life to people, just made up stories on television on drama cop shows. Nor did I ever expect it to happen to someone in my family. I hope he didn't have to suffer. RIP Casey. I love you.



How very sad  I am sorry for your loss.


----------



## Kamily

Well Ive had a boyfriend for the past 3 months and got dumped yesterday.  We had known each other since high school and had lost touch over the years, but reconnected thru Facebook. Im sad, heartbroken, and feel awful. Its kicked my depression and anxiety into overdrive.


----------



## TwilightStarr

Kamily said:


> Well Ive had a boyfriend for the past 3 months and got dumped yesterday.  We had known each other since high school and had lost touch over the years, but reconnected thru Facebook. Im sad, heartbroken, and feel awful. Its kicked my depression and anxiety into overdrive.



I am so sorry


----------



## dharmabean

Another bullying incident:


*No they werent suspended after the first attack, just had their parents called, obviously that didnt help, it made it worse because they told her today she was getting a beat down for snitching on them in the first place.*


----------



## HottiMegan

dharmabean said:


> Another bullying incident:
> 
> 
> *No they werent suspended after the first attack, just had their parents called, obviously that didnt help, it made it worse because they told her today she was getting a beat down for snitching on them in the first place.*



That seriously sucks. My oldest has had some bullying incidents and i can tell you, it's so hard to get action that makes you feel good about the situation. Max is a black belt (kid level) in tae kwon do. We got him into martial arts so he could hold his own being a little person who has hearing aids.


----------



## Kamily

TwilightStarr said:


> I am so sorry





Thank you so very much. 

I have been turned away from from not one, but two different places for treatment. I contacted them begging for help and I was told they couldnt do anything. Their responses were "Here is a sedative...go home and try Comp Care on Monday" and "If you are suicidal, go the nearest ER". 
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF ANSWER IS THAT???? I thought these people are supposed to be there to help. Im not suicidal. But is that what its gonna take for me to get help from them?

They had the nerve at one ER to ask me if I was OK when they discharged me. I looked at the nurse and said "NO!! Are you fucking crazy? I came here for help and you people are sending me home!!" She said "Oh ok sign here and you can leave." What a joke!!!


----------



## NewfieGal

It snowed here yeaterday  so not ready to see that yet


----------



## Blackhawk2293

dharmabean said:


> If ONE person, just one person stood up with her, for her...
> 
> Bullied and beat up at school, and that was video recorded? I bet it went viral throughout her peers. Where the feck was anybody to help her?  This really pisses me off. I had a friend commit suicide. I had another friend attempt suicide.
> 
> Just ONE person to stand up and say, "Stop!" I am not talking about her teachers, or people with authority. But people in her age group. The whole band wagon mentality is sickening.



That's the one thing I hate more than bullies themselves, the "bystanders". They are anything but "innocent" as they usually stand there and do nothing or they laugh while it is happening. That was my experience of bullying both at school and when I got home and I went down the suicidal rude and when I failed at that it made me feel even worse.

Those bystanders are usually the first ones to cry their crocodile tears when something like this happens about how "we just can't understand why they would do this and we're devastated". Oh please! Watch me die from the amount of vomit I let out at that fake devastation.


----------



## Ruffie

Police called today to tell us that they have closed the investigation on the hit and run that injured my husband three weeks ago. They put it up on Crimestoppers but had no further tips or leads so case is closed. Guess the irresponsible lady got herself a pass.


----------



## Twilley

I got fired from my job. What a fucking couple of weeks, if you'll pardon my mouth


----------



## Linda

Watching my son in so much pain because of his father.


----------



## balletguy

So I went on 3 interviews with this company said they would call me on Tuesday as I was in the running.....it's Friday WFT. Im sad I'm mad....


----------



## danielson123

It's tough whenever you go out for a couple drinks with your dad and you can hear him telling people that the biggest mistake of his life was getting married while you're sitting right next to him.


----------



## mel

stupid fucking idiots


----------



## largenlovely

I'm sick


----------



## BriannaBombshell

I'm just missing someone I can no longer communicate with


----------



## mel

feeling alone. I hate this


----------



## Ruffie

Hi its me the cursed woman. We had our first winter storm over the past couple of days. My oldest son was taking kids back to the Ranch (a group home for youth) from school in the fifteen passenger van. They met someone on the crappy grid road to the facility and ended up in a rollover accident. He got all the kids to safety including one young boy who was so twisted in his seatbelt he had to burn the seatbelt with a lighter to free him. Once the kids were loaded into another vehicle to go back to the facility and his adrenaline subsided he realized he was hurt. Just got back from the ER with him and he as herniated disc, cuts and bruising, a mild concussion and probably whiplash. I am so proud of him for all he did to take care of those kids! 
I honestly have had the worst year and kinda makes me want to gather my loved ones close and hunker down inside this house like a bunker.


----------



## Mathias

Ruffie said:


> Hi its me the cursed woman. We had our first winter storm over the past couple of days. My oldest son was taking kids back to the Ranch (a group home for youth) from school in the fifteen passenger van. They met someone on the crappy grid road to the facility and ended up in a rollover accident. He got all the kids to safety including one young boy who was so twisted in his seatbelt he had to burn the seatbelt with a lighter to free him. Once the kids were loaded into another vehicle to go back to the facility and his adrenaline subsided he realized he was hurt. Just got back from the ER with him and he as herniated disc, cuts and bruising, a mild concussion and probably whiplash. I am so proud of him for all he did to take care of those kids!
> I honestly have had the worst year and kinda makes me want to gather my loved ones close and hunker down inside this house like a bunker.



((((Ruffie))))) I'm so, so sorry. Glad your son is alright and helped others to safety.


----------



## CleverBomb

Ruffie said:


> Hi its me the cursed woman. We had our first winter storm over the past couple of days. My oldest son was taking kids back to the Ranch (a group home for youth) from school in the fifteen passenger van. They met someone on the crappy grid road to the facility and ended up in a rollover accident. He got all the kids to safety including one young boy who was so twisted in his seatbelt he had to burn the seatbelt with a lighter to free him. Once the kids were loaded into another vehicle to go back to the facility and his adrenaline subsided he realized he was hurt. Just got back from the ER with him and he as herniated disc, cuts and bruising, a mild concussion and probably whiplash. I am so proud of him for all he did to take care of those kids!
> I honestly have had the worst year and kinda makes me want to gather my loved ones close and hunker down inside this house like a bunker.


Cursed? You're the parent of a hero. I wouldn't call that a curse!


----------



## Ruffie

Over the past 12 months 

Hit a deer totalling off my jeep and resulting in a low grade back injury and whiplash for me.
Wheel came off on the freeway on our other vehicle a month later resulting in aggravating injuries and extensive damage to the van.
My mother diagnosed with terminal cancer and I (in conjunction with Home care aids) care for her.
My husband had angioplasty and a stent put in and the recovery and lifestyle changes needed with that.
Lost my job of over ten years 
Got a new job but its very part time until you build senority so you are basically on call and never know when your working which with everything else that is going on is stressful.
Husband hit while cycling by a driver that left the scene three weeks ago abd he is now rehabing himself from that.
And now the accident with the son yesterday.

I am grateful that with al the accidents we had we had good outcomes as if someone was watching out for us as it could have been much worse. And of course I am proud of my son and what he did to get those kids to safety. It just seems that I just get back up on my feet and then something comes along and sweeps me back off them for a time. But I am stubborn as hell and just get up and keep walking forward. So we jokingly refer to me as the cursed woman between my elder and myself.

So that is why I refer to myself as the cursed woman.


----------



## Ruffie

Mathias said:


> ((((Ruffie))))) I'm so, so sorry. Glad your son is alright and helped others to safety.



Thanks Mathias


----------



## Surlysomething

Next year has to be better, lady. Sending lots of good thoughts your way.

My family went through a really terrible time similar to yours with some tragic losses but we soldiered through and this past year was our best in forever and we're so thankful.

Hang in there!





Ruffie said:


> Over the past 12 months
> 
> Hit a deer totalling off my jeep and resulting in a low grade back injury and whiplash for me.
> Wheel came off on the freeway on our other vehicle a month later resulting in aggravating injuries and extensive damage to the van.
> My mother diagnosed with terminal cancer and I (in conjunction with Home care aids) care for her.
> My husband had angioplasty and a stent put in and the recovery and lifestyle changes needed with that.
> Lost my job of over ten years
> Got a new job but its very part time until you build senority so you are basically on call and never know when your working which with everything else that is going on is stressful.
> Husband hit while cycling by a driver that left the scene three weeks ago abd he is now rehabing himself from that.
> And now the accident with the son yesterday.
> 
> I am grateful that with al the accidents we had we had good outcomes as if someone was watching out for us as it could have been much worse. And of course I am proud of my son and what he did to get those kids to safety. It just seems that I just get back up on my feet and then something comes along and sweeps me back off them for a time. But I am stubborn as hell and just get up and keep walking forward. So we jokingly refer to me as the cursed woman between my elder and myself.
> 
> So that is why I refer to myself as the cursed woman.


----------



## Ruffie

Thank you so much. I just keep thinking okay THIS has got to be it and then something else happens. So hopefully we experience a year of good things as a balance like you said!


----------



## Surlysomething

It will happen! We had two weddings and two babies born, it's been fantastic. 

Good thoughts, good thoughts! 



Ruffie said:


> Thank you so much. I just keep thinking okay THIS has got to be it and then something else happens. So hopefully we experience a year of good things as a balance like you said!


----------



## TwilightStarr

Just lost an ebay auction  was trying to win a pair of shoes for my nephew.


----------



## Rojodi

My mother informed me earlier this evening that she was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer.


----------



## CastingPearls

Rojodi said:


> My mother informed me earlier this evening that she was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer.


I'm so sorry. My grandfather had pancreatic cancer. (((Rojodi)))


----------



## Rojodi

CastingPearls said:


> I'm so sorry. My grandfather had pancreatic cancer. (((Rojodi)))



Thank you, they believe they caught it realtively early. Well, she is 69, around the time when most of her relatives were diagnosed with it, those that had it. Funny, if people in her family had cancer, they died at the average of 72-years-old, if not, they lived well into their 80s/90s/100s.

My father-in-law was diagnosed with it in 1993...

Mofo is STILL alive!!!


----------



## CastingPearls

Rojodi said:


> Thank you, they believe they caught it realtively early. Well, she is 69, around the time when most of her relatives were diagnosed with it, those that had it. Funny, if people in her family had cancer, they died at the average of 72-years-old, if not, they lived well into their 80s/90s/100s.
> 
> My father-in-law was diagnosed with it in 1993...
> 
> Mofo is STILL alive!!!


Researchers are doing wonders with prolonging the lives of people with pancreatic cancer. I hope you don't think that I meant anything other than that I empathize. I wish your mom a full complete recovery. Battling cancer is a hard fight for everyone involved, but in my personal experience, worth it.


----------



## Rojodi

CastingPearls said:


> Researchers are doing wonders with prolonging the lives of people with pancreatic cancer. I hope you don't think that I meant anything other than that I empathize. I wish your mom a full complete recovery. Battling cancer is a hard fight for everyone involved, but in my personal experience, worth it.



It's going to help that she has a daughter who's an RN, a son who's gone through this process with a father-in-law, a daughter-in-law who has the experience helping her father, and DIL whose job in a healthcare insurance company has her closely working with many doctors - the company is run by doctors.


----------



## Ruffie

Rojodi said:


> My mother informed me earlier this evening that she was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer.



I am sorry to hear of her diagnosis. I know how it makes you feel as I am dealing with my mothers cancer. Seek support around you and both of you will get through.


----------



## Surlysomething

So sorry to hear this. *hug*



Rojodi said:


> My mother informed me earlier this evening that she was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer.


----------



## ButlerGirl09

My grandmother passed away yesterday and today I had to put down my dog. I need a pause button for life...


----------



## TwilightStarr

ButlerGirl09 said:


> My grandmother passed away yesterday and today I had to put down my dog. I need a pause button for life...



I am so sorry for your losses


----------



## spiritangel

ButlerGirl09 said:


> My grandmother passed away yesterday and today I had to put down my dog. I need a pause button for life...



Lots and lots and lots of squishy hugs, wish there were some words or some such that would make th is all so much easier for you. Remember we are here if you need us. Thinking of you. So hard to loose to family members in as many days.


----------



## Surlysomething

Very sorry to hear this.

*hug*



ButlerGirl09 said:


> My grandmother passed away yesterday and today I had to put down my dog. I need a pause button for life...


----------



## Mathias

ButlerGirl09 said:


> My grandmother passed away yesterday and today I had to put down my dog. I need a pause button for life...



(((((Hugs))) I don't know what to say. I'm so sorry for your losses.


----------



## Surlysomething

Freaking pinched nerve in my neck rendering me virtually useless.


----------



## LeoGibson

Surlysomething said:


> Freaking pinched nerve in my neck rendering me virtually useless.



That bites. I have been dealing with the exact same thing for about 10 or so days now. After a couple of days of useless it has just been a nagging aggravation ever since.


----------



## Ruffie

ButlerGirl09 said:


> My grandmother passed away yesterday and today I had to put down my dog. I need a pause button for life...



So sorry honey life can get overwhelming. Hang in there!


----------



## Ruffie

Surlysomething said:


> Freaking pinched nerve in my neck rendering me virtually useless.



Healing thoughts sent your way!


----------



## Surlysomething

I feel so gross. I slept most of the day but finally forced my ass to get up and get in the shower. I managed to get to the store for some supplies (chocolate and cookies  ) but now i'm back in my jammies and trying to ease the pain with some Tylenol 3's with codeine that I still have from some dental work I had done a couple months back. Hahaha.

DRUGS. :eat2:



LeoGibson said:


> That bites. I have been dealing with the exact same thing for about 10 or so days now. After a couple of days of useless it has just been a nagging aggravation ever since.


----------



## Surlysomething

Thanks, lady. It's a dark, rainy day in Vancity so it feels ok to spend most of the day in my jammies hoping it works itself out.



Ruffie said:


> Healing thoughts sent your way!


----------



## CleverBomb

Surlysomething said:


> I feel so gross. I slept most of the day but finally forced my ass to get up and get in the shower. I managed to get to the store for some supplies (chocolate and cookies  ) but now i'm back in my jammies and trying to ease the pain with *some Tylenol 3's with codeine that I still have from some dental work I had done a couple months back*. Hahaha.
> 
> DRUGS. :eat2:


Transcend dental medication!


----------



## Surlysomething

Very "clever" ! :bow:




CleverBomb said:


> Transcend dental medication!


----------



## HDANGEL15

ButlerGirl09 said:


> My grandmother passed away yesterday and today I had to put down my dog. I need a pause button for life...



*wow that IS a lot to take in a few days....very difficult putting down a pet  speaking from experience...feel it, mourn your grandmother and in time consider another pet......(((BUTLERGIRL)))*


----------



## That Guy You Met Once

Yes, it's good that I'm getting out of a relationship that had become severely emotionally abusive.

But on the other hand, it seems like it'll come at the cost of almost totally cutting off communication with the person I used to love, and even until very recently considered my best friend.


----------



## CastingPearls

Nacho died.


----------



## HottiMegan

CastingPearls said:


> Nacho died.



Oh i'm sorry. I know he was your little buddy.


----------



## dharmabean

My previous roommates totally disregarded MY items that were packed and put away safely. Upon arrival at my old apartment, I found my items gone through, shifted around, tossed about and half hazardly put in closets so she could turn the room into her office. I am discovering a lot of my things broken. The biggest, most painful thing broken so far is my Tibetan Singing Bowl used for meditations.


----------



## CleverBomb

CastingPearls said:


> Nacho died.


I'm so sorry.


----------



## Ruffie

Sorry for the loss of Nacho CP


----------



## Surlysomething

I tried so hard. I really did.


----------



## largenlovely

Today is the 20th anniversary of my brother's death. I've been dreading it all month long. He died (along with 3 other people, including his best friend) in a car accident when I was 18 (he was almost 17). So it was tragic and traumatizing. So every year on halloween, I wind up re-living the events of that night and the following morning. The police cars in the yard, the police officer telling us what happened and etc. I've tried to go out on halloween before but I will wind up getting sick to my stomach from trying to push the feelings away. So, I just allow myself to spend the day remembering him and grieve for our lost relationship this one day of the year.

I sure do miss my baby brother though.


----------



## Dromond

The gang has left taking little Charlie, Jackie's grandson, out trick or treating. He's dressed as Luigi from the Mario game series. I had planned to go with them, but instead I'm at home sick. Feverish, head plugged, throat swollen... ugh. 

At least I have Sadie (our dog) to keep me company.


----------



## spiritangel

CastingPearls said:


> Nacho died.



OH Lainey I am so so sorry to hear this I know how much a treasured member of your family Nacho was lots and lots of hugs.


----------



## Linda

My relationship ended today because of my faith. Seven months we were together. I am a believer and he isn't. I did not pressure him to be a believer but I expected him to respect that I was and not make so many sarcastic comments. He said that our differences in opinions on faith was just too big of a chasm for him to cross or deal with. Personally, I just think his depression about being stuck in a crappy job right now has overtaken him and he is looking for something else to blame. I am emotionally exhausted tonight and just very, very sad.


----------



## dharmabean

Linda said:


> My relationship ended today because of my faith. Seven months we were together. I am a believer and he isn't. I did not pressure him to be a believer but I expected him to respect that I was and not make so many sarcastic comments. He said that our differences in opinions on faith was just too big of a chasm for him to cross or deal with. Personally, I just think his depression about being stuck in a crappy job right now has overtaken him and he is looking for something else to blame. I am emotionally exhausted tonight and just very, very sad.



That is really hard to contend with, and I'm so sorry you're hurting right now.


----------



## Sasquatch!

I.... have a lot of sad thinking to do. It is making me sad.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Linda said:


> My relationship ended today because of my faith. Seven months we were together. I am a believer and he isn't. I did not pressure him to be a believer but I expected him to respect that I was and not make so many sarcastic comments. He said that our differences in opinions on faith was just too big of a chasm for him to cross or deal with. Personally, I just think his depression about being stuck in a crappy job right now has overtaken him and he is looking for something else to blame. I am emotionally exhausted tonight and just very, very sad.



I'm so sorry, Linda.  *gentle hugs*


----------



## largenlovely

Linda said:


> My relationship ended today because of my faith. Seven months we were together. I am a believer and he isn't. I did not pressure him to be a believer but I expected him to respect that I was and not make so many sarcastic comments. He said that our differences in opinions on faith was just too big of a chasm for him to cross or deal with. Personally, I just think his depression about being stuck in a crappy job right now has overtaken him and he is looking for something else to blame. I am emotionally exhausted tonight and just very, very sad.



Ugh, I'm sorry  I've been in that situation before. I'm very open minded about spirituality but I had a boyfriend who thought all of it was ridiculous. He would make comments periodically as well.

If he can't be as respectful about your beliefs as you are concerning his disbelief, well...whatta ya do. There's no reason you should have to feel belittled because you believe differently.


----------



## Linda

dharmabean said:


> That is really hard to contend with, and I'm so sorry you're hurting right now.





BigBeautifulMe said:


> I'm so sorry, Linda.  *gentle hugs*





largenlovely said:


> Ugh, I'm sorry  I've been in that situation before. I'm very open minded about spirituality but I had a boyfriend who thought all of it was ridiculous. He would make comments periodically as well.
> 
> If he can't be as respectful about your beliefs as you are concerning his disbelief, well...whatta ya do. There's no reason you should have to feel belittled because you believe differently.



Thank you! I am doing better this morning. It is what it is. I can't make someone want to be with me. I am worth way more than begging him to change his mind. While he is home submerging himself in hopelessness and darkness I am emerging because of my faith. It comforts me and gives me hope. Monday!! Bring it!


----------



## warwagon86

ButlerGirl09 said:


> My grandmother passed away yesterday and today I had to put down my dog. I need a pause button for life...



sorry M hope your ok! sending my hugs and kisses! god bless x


----------



## Ruffie

Spent the day in the ER with my mother who we had to take in by ambulance this morning. She was in unbearable pain through her left side from hip to heel but x-rays revealed no broken or cracked bones. They are keeping her there overnight to access her mobility and how well she will tolerate an increase in pain meds(has had a bleeding ulcer in the past) as well as increasing iron and magnesium levels. Wondering if this is further progression of the Lymphoma that is centred on her left side. Cancelled Husbands dental work in another city from his bike accident as we may have to take her home tomorrow and need to be with her for a while and lets just say I am wrung out.


----------



## Victoria08

I'm writing a letter to someone and the pure sadness I feel at seeing the details written down on a piece of paper is just indescribable. It shouldn't hurt this much after I've taken 2 years to process what really happened. It shouldn't be this hard to say "Hi, my name is Victoria and I am your granddaughter". I don't know if I can send the letter.


----------



## Lamia

I am giving my two weeks notice at my job. I am so depressed. I have never had to leave a job before because I suck. I have always ALWAYS exceeded expectations, but I just keep fucking up and I don't know why. I hate making mistakes.


----------



## Lamia

CastingPearls said:


> Nacho died.



So sorry to hear this Lainey.


----------



## Surlysomething

My sister is going in for surgery today. Poor girl is falling apart.


----------



## Ruffie

Ruffie said:


> Spent the day in the ER with my mother who we had to take in by ambulance this morning. She was in unbearable pain through her left side from hip to heel but x-rays revealed no broken or cracked bones. They are keeping her there overnight to access her mobility and how well she will tolerate an increase in pain meds(has had a bleeding ulcer in the past) as well as increasing iron and magnesium levels. Wondering if this is further progression of the Lymphoma that is centred on her left side. Cancelled Husbands dental work in another city from his bike accident as we may have to take her home tomorrow and need to be with her for a while and lets just say I am wrung out.


I am beyond frustrated. Mom has a fall in the ER washroom last night and her doctor comes in this afternoon and discharged her without even seeing her! Then they do not even fill the prescription the ER doctor suggested for Tylenol threes he suggested to help her deal with the pain! So spent an hour on the phone at her clinic trying to get another doctor to prescribe them for her as her doctor away for the long weekend here. After talking to five people I got her former doctor in that clinic to prescribe them and hubby just got back from picking them up with a months supply for her. Guess sometimes it is good to be a bitch! Lol


----------



## hal84

That sometimes your damned if you do damned if you don't.


----------



## littlefairywren

Linda said:


> My relationship ended today because of my faith. Seven months we were together. I am a believer and he isn't. I did not pressure him to be a believer but I expected him to respect that I was and not make so many sarcastic comments. He said that our differences in opinions on faith was just too big of a chasm for him to cross or deal with. Personally, I just think his depression about being stuck in a crappy job right now has overtaken him and he is looking for something else to blame. I am emotionally exhausted tonight and just very, very sad.



I'm so sorry, Linda. Take pride in handling yourself well and with dignity. Sending you tender hugs.


----------



## Scorsese86

This has been an interesting week... first my candidate looses the election - and today I learn that my ex got engaged to the guy she dumped me for. Beaten by a man who is 3'6"!


----------



## Sasquatch!

Scorsese86 said:


> This has been an interesting week... first my candidate looses the election - and today I learn that my ex got engaged to the guy she dumped me for. Beaten by a man who is 3'6"!



Dwarves can be really hot though. Don't feel bad.


----------



## CastingPearls

Scorsese86 said:


> This has been an interesting week... first my candidate looses the election - and today I learn that my ex got engaged to the guy she dumped me for. Beaten by a man who is 3'6"!


Why would you want someone who doesn't want you back? You deserve better.


----------



## Dromond

My depression is really doing a number on me today.


----------



## Scorsese86

CastingPearls said:


> Why would you want someone who doesn't want you back? You deserve better.



I'm really over her, but it's still that feeling that she dumped me for someone else.


----------



## TwilightStarr

My sister came over yesterday and wanted to take her son home for the night, her son that me and my mom have been raising for the past 4 months, because she was too busy running around in her illegal on soo many ways it's ridiculous car with her drug dealer boyfriend.
Then today she calls me and the first thing she says is "come get your kid"

WTF?!?! ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!?! 

No hooker that's your kid! I know you've forgotten these past few months and by all means if you want to sign over custody hold on real quick while I find a pen!!!!


----------



## dharmabean

TwilightStarr said:


> Then today she calls me and the first thing she says is "come get your kid"



 This pisses me off for you in soooo many ways. women who can't breed want children so bad, and women who can sometimes don't deserve too. At least your nephew has someone he can trust and watch over him. Kudos to you for being a rockstar aunt.


----------



## largenlovely

TwilightStarr said:


> My sister came over yesterday and wanted to take her son home for the night, her son that me and my mom have been raising for the past 4 months, because she was too busy running around in her illegal on soo many ways it's ridiculous car with her drug dealer boyfriend.
> Then today she calls me and the first thing she says is "come get your kid"
> 
> WTF?!?! ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!?!
> 
> No hooker that's your kid! I know you've forgotten these past few months and by all means if you want to sign over custody hold on real quick while I find a pen!!!!



Ugh  we have people on drugs in my family but I thank God it's not in my immediate bunch. Sorry ur having to go through this but at least ur able to be a stabilizing factor in the child's life.


----------



## CastingPearls

Deleting old PMs and crying like a baby.


----------



## Surlysomething

Big hugs your way, E.






CastingPearls said:


> Deleting old PMs and crying like a baby.


----------



## Linda

CastingPearls said:


> Deleting old PMs and crying like a baby.





Surlysomething said:


> Big hugs your way, E.



Group hug!! Love you Lainey.


----------



## Ruffie

CastingPearls said:


> Deleting old PMs and crying like a baby.



Good cleansing literally and figuratively for you. You will come through this stronger Hugs


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

((((((((((((((Lainey)))))))))))))))


----------



## TwilightStarr

dharmabean said:


> This pisses me off for you in soooo many ways. women who can't breed want children so bad, and women who can sometimes don't deserve too. At least your nephew has someone he can trust and watch over him. Kudos to you for being a rockstar aunt.





largenlovely said:


> Ugh  we have people on drugs in my family but I thank God it's not in my immediate bunch. Sorry ur having to go through this but at least ur able to be a stabilizing factor in the child's life.



Yeah it's been rough and I can't believe she has let it go this far. He has had it bad enough this past year or so since his daddy left and moved back home to Baltimore. Now his mom hasn't been around except for a handful of times for the past 4 months.


----------



## CastingPearls

Surlysomething said:


> Big hugs your way, E.





Linda said:


> Group hug!! Love you Lainey.





Ruffie said:


> Good cleansing literally and figuratively for you. You will come through this stronger Hugs





BigBeautifulMe said:


> ((((((((((((((Lainey)))))))))))))))




Thanks, everyone. I'm great today. It was just a momentary lapse. Missing someone is a natural part of getting over them and I'm human. It's fine. Like Ruffie said, it's cleansing. It's cathartic. Thanks. <3


----------



## Lamia

Lamia said:


> I am giving my two weeks notice at my job. I am so depressed. I have never had to leave a job before because I suck. I have always ALWAYS exceeded expectations, but I just keep fucking up and I don't know why. I hate making mistakes.



Update...I went and talked to HR and they're moving me back to the Call Center so I won't be out of a job or lose my benefits. YAY!


----------



## CastingPearls

Lamia said:


> Update...I went and talked to HR and they're moving me back to the Call Center so I won't be out of a job or lose my benefits. YAY!


This is wonderful news! Good for you!


----------



## Lamia

CastingPearls said:


> This is wonderful news! Good for you!



Thanks Lainey and thanks for the rep


----------



## Surlysomething

It's usually just a matter of time before someone's true colours show. Still such a disappointment.


----------



## Ho Ho Tai

Surlysomething said:


> It's usually just a matter of time before someone's true colours show. Still such a disappointment.



What's the 'true color' of a rainbow? We see that 'ROYGBIV' portion of the spectrum but, because it is refracted sunlight, the colors extend beyond our range of vision, into the ultraviolet and the infrared, as far as the atmosphere can transmit. Seen altogether, the color of the rainbow would be the color of the sun.

I guess we are all rainbows in a sense. But what is the 'atmosphere' through which our colors must pass? What are the characteristics of the vision which interprets them? As Robert Burns hinted, can we even see the beauty (or the ugliness) in ourselves? Who reflects our light back to us? Do we all have the color of the sun within us, somewhere?

Move along, folks. Nothing really profound here (or maybe there is) - just a bit of word and concept play.


----------



## Surlysomething

A little too deep for this girl today. But thank you. 



Ho Ho Tai said:


> What's the 'true color' of a rainbow? We see that 'ROYGBIV' portion of the spectrum but, because it is refracted sunlight, the colors extend beyond our range of vision, into the ultraviolet and the infrared, as far as the atmosphere can transmit. Seen altogether, the color of the rainbow would be the color of the sun.
> 
> I guess we are all rainbows in a sense. But what is the 'atmosphere' through which our colors must pass? What are the characteristics of the vision which interprets them? As Robert Burns hinted, can we even see the beauty (or the ugliness) in ourselves? Who reflects our light back to us? Do we all have the color of the sun within us, somewhere?
> 
> Move along, folks. Nothing really profound here (or maybe there is) - just a bit of word and concept play.


----------



## largenlovely

Pms someone shoot me and put me out of my misery


----------



## ODFFA

A guy who was working in our front yard just walked through the front door and stole my laptop not 30 minutes ago. I'm livid, shaking like a leaf and incredibly sad at the thought of some of the things on there that I'm not likely to ever get back :sad: Just grateful no one got hurt.


----------



## moore2me

ODFFA said:


> A guy who was working in our front yard just walked through the front door and stole my laptop not 30 minutes ago. I'm livid, shaking like a leaf and incredibly sad at the thought of some of the things on there that I'm not likely to ever get back :sad: Just grateful no one got hurt.



You're right, it could have been worse. Also, you might redo your security a little in case he decides to come back.

My girlfriend got her laptop stolen and she called the manufacturer to let them know. Turns out the thief had tried to change the registration to his name and address. The powers at be (the law, insurance, etc,) tho decided it wasn't worth their (you pick - time? effort? risk? getting called away from big cases?) and would not pursue it. She had to let it go. A sorry state of affairs in my opinion.


----------



## Micara

One of my co-workers got taken to the hospital on Thursday. His wife divorced him and he's been a mess for over a year now- coming in to work drunk, falling asleep at his desk, etc. For the past 2 months, he has looked really bad- very bloated and yellow. Numerous people have expressed concern to him, but he would just brush it off. Or have an excuse. Or say that he went to the doctor and nothing is wrong. He looked like my uncle did the day that he passed away from liver cancer. 

So, the day he went to the hospital he had passed out at his desk and no one noticed. I guess he came to and tried to go to the bathroom and passed out again. So they took him out in a wheelchair. He was immediately admitted to ICU with kidney and liver failure. His liver damage is irreversible. He is now on dialysis. He hadn't been to the doctor in over a year.

It's just really sad when someone doesn't want help or won't face reality. He could have died. 

Come to find out today that he also has a serious contagious illness and that we've all been exposed to it for at least a month. They brought in special cleaners to clean out his cubicle. So I am also a little mad that his lack of care could potentially affect me and my co-workers. Sad and mad. What a combo.


----------



## Surlysomething

That's awful any way you look at it. 




Micara said:


> One of my co-workers got taken to the hospital on Thursday. His wife divorced him and he's been a mess for over a year now- coming in to work drunk, falling asleep at his desk, etc. For the past 2 months, he has looked really bad- very bloated and yellow. Numerous people have expressed concern to him, but he would just brush it off. Or have an excuse. Or say that he went to the doctor and nothing is wrong. He looked like my uncle did the day that he passed away from liver cancer.
> 
> So, the day he went to the hospital he had passed out at his desk and no one noticed. I guess he came to and tried to go to the bathroom and passed out again. So they took him out in a wheelchair. He was immediately admitted to ICU with kidney and liver failure. His liver damage is irreversible. He is now on dialysis. He hadn't been to the doctor in over a year.
> 
> It's just really sad when someone doesn't want help or won't face reality. He could have died.
> 
> Come to find out today that he also has a serious contagious illness and that we've all been exposed to it for at least a month. They brought in special cleaners to clean out his cubicle. So I am also a little mad that his lack of care could potentially affect me and my co-workers. Sad and mad. What a combo.


----------



## SSBBW Katerina

I've just turned 43 and have nothing to show for it. In pain everyday and suffer from agoraphobia and have no spcl someone in my life. As much as I'd like an ideal person in my life, I've grown accustomed to my solitude. I'm caught between the devil & the deep blue sea.


----------



## Blackhawk2293

Micara said:


> One of my co-workers got taken to the hospital on Thursday. His wife divorced him and he's been a mess for over a year now- coming in to work drunk, falling asleep at his desk, etc. For the past 2 months, he has looked really bad- very bloated and yellow. Numerous people have expressed concern to him, but he would just brush it off. Or have an excuse. Or say that he went to the doctor and nothing is wrong. He looked like my uncle did the day that he passed away from liver cancer.
> 
> So, the day he went to the hospital he had passed out at his desk and no one noticed. I guess he came to and tried to go to the bathroom and passed out again. So they took him out in a wheelchair. He was immediately admitted to ICU with kidney and liver failure. His liver damage is irreversible. He is now on dialysis. He hadn't been to the doctor in over a year.
> 
> It's just really sad when someone doesn't want help or won't face reality. He could have died.
> 
> Come to find out today that he also has a serious contagious illness and that we've all been exposed to it for at least a month. They brought in special cleaners to clean out his cubicle. So I am also a little mad that his lack of care could potentially affect me and my co-workers. Sad and mad. What a combo.



Perhaps your co-worker wanted to die and this was the easiest way for him to do that. My grandfather died in similar circumstances in 1965 and refused any form of medical treatment, even from my father (who had just started practicing medicine at the time). The old man tied his heart with his work and when it all got taken away from him, that's when he did allow himself to "slide" (I can't think of a better way to describe it).

But I hope everything is ok with you and that contagious disease you were exposed to.


----------



## CAMellie

Looks like it's another non-viable pregnancy. Nothing visible in the gestational sack other than the yolk. Just waiting for the call with my hcg levels to confirm.


----------



## Linda

CAMellie said:


> Looks like it's another non-viable pregnancy. Nothing visible in the gestational sack other than the yolk. Just waiting for the call with my hcg levels to confirm.



(((hugs))) Sorry Mel.


----------



## Jello404

I'm a bit sad that I'm not a mum. Idk it's the holidays. I'
I've always wanted to be married or have a partner and a family. It's easy to ignore it for the entire year but during this time I really can't tell that little voice to STFU. Lol but in I'm only 22 so..I've got PLENTY of time. Just gotta stay focused in building my future up even tho that voice keeps on nagging me. Lol


----------



## Rojodi

Mr. Food died


----------



## Surlysomething

Fuck my job.
Fuck the people in my life that are clueless and uncaring which would be almost everyone.
Fuck the ignorant, useless, self important fucks that live in my city.


Fuck this life.


----------



## largenlovely

The only teacher I liked from high school passed away. I took creative writing as an elective my senior year and she taught the class. My brother died that year and she was genuinely concerned about how I was coping. She went that extra mile to show she cared and not just about me, she did it for all her students. Though she still made you feel that she was fully invested in you as an individual. She was the *only* teacher who even acknowledged that I had this catastrophic thing happen in my young life.

Anyway, we kept up with each other on facebook periodically. She retired and moved away. So I wasn't able to go pay my respects or anything. It just made me really sad to hear she has passed.


----------



## moore2me

largenlovely said:


> The only teacher I liked from high school passed away. I took creative writing as an elective my senior year and she taught the class. My brother died that year and she was genuinely concerned about how I was coping. She went that extra mile to show she cared and not just about me, she did it for all her students. Though she still made you feel that she was fully invested in you as an individual. She was the *only* teacher who even acknowledged that I had this catastrophic thing happen in my young life.
> 
> Anyway, we kept up with each other on facebook periodically. She retired and moved away. So I wasn't able to go pay my respects or anything. It just made me really sad to hear she has passed.



Why don't you honor your teacher by writing down some of the things you have told us and sending it to her family (kids) or other teachers in your old school? Tell them how much she meant to you growing up.


----------



## largenlovely

moore2me said:


> Why don't you honor your teacher by writing down some of the things you have told us and sending it to her family (kids) or other teachers in your old school? Tell them how much she meant to you growing up.



I did write a note on her facebook page because I saw that her grandchildren were posting stuff. They haven't responded to it or anything but I still felt that I was at least able to say what I needed to say and that maybe she could see it from where she is now...I hope she can anyway. 

The thought of the spirit world having access to social media makes me laugh lol, but ya know...hopefully she's able to feel the love and see whatever manner in which it's put out there.


----------



## Ruffie

My thoughts are with you all as you go through these issues. I truly do understand how stress and sadness weighs on you and know I empathize. 

On top of all the other issues we have dealt with this year my son is having relationship issues with his girlfriend and there are her kids involved. Its hard seeing him so sad and devastated that this relationship may end and he loses his family.


----------



## Gingembre

CAMellie said:


> Looks like it's another non-viable pregnancy. Nothing visible in the gestational sack other than the yolk. Just waiting for the call with my hcg levels to confirm.



I'm so sorry ((hugs)).


----------



## CAMellie

Thank you so much, everybody. My hcg levels, as of yesterday, are 10,396 - which is perfectly normal for 8 weeks pregnant. I go back to the hospital tomorrow morning for another blood draw and another ultrasound. I got a call in the middle of the night from a doctor, and then a nurse, expressing concern that, along with a blighted ovum, I may have an ectopic pregnancy. If my hcg levels have doubled in the 48 hours since my last blood draw, and there is no sign of an ectopic pregnancy, there is the possibility that my tilted uterus is making it hard to visualize a baby in the gestational sack.
I have punched optimism in the face and am going into my appointment tomorrow an emotionally blank slate. Wish my luck.

P.S. Sorry for all the gory details...I needed to write it down somewhere.


----------



## HottiMegan

I hope it goes okay. When i was pregnant with Alex, they didn't see anything in the first ultrasound. I had to do the HCG testing. It was the scariest couple of weeks ever. It was during the xmas-new year time frame so it moved WAY to slowly for me. I was so scared. 

I'll be keeping you in my thoughts.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

CAMellie said:


> Thank you so much, everybody. My hcg levels, as of yesterday, are 10,396 - which is perfectly normal for 8 weeks pregnant. I go back to the hospital tomorrow morning for another blood draw and another ultrasound. I got a call in the middle of the night from a doctor, and then a nurse, expressing concern that, along with a blighted ovum, I may have an ectopic pregnancy. If my hcg levels have doubled in the 48 hours since my last blood draw, and there is no sign of an ectopic pregnancy, there is the possibility that my tilted uterus is making it hard to visualize a baby in the gestational sack.
> I have punched optimism in the face and am going into my appointment tomorrow an emotionally blank slate. Wish my luck.
> 
> P.S. Sorry for all the gory details...I needed to write it down somewhere.


I'm thinking about you, honey. ((((((Mellie))))))


----------



## one2one

Ho Ho Tai said:


> *snip*
> Move along, folks. Nothing really profound here (or maybe there is) - just a bit of word and concept play.



"Ho Ho Tai has exceeded their stored private messages quota and can not accept further messages until they clear some space."
 
I really did try to write back to you but could not get the message sent. See above. So, to answer your question ... That is a wager you would certainly win. Although the official count is 15,003, and the view from my front door is lovely but changing over to it's solid state as I type this. My nephew is at your alma mater, and any place that serves Bearnaise sauce with their french fries has a soft spot in my heart. I hope you enjoyed your birthday and wish you and Mrs. Ho Ho a blessed holiday season ahead!


----------



## Ho Ho Tai

one2one said:


> "Ho Ho Tai has exceeded their stored private messages quota and can not accept further messages until they clear some space."
> 
> I really did try to write back to you but could not get the message sent. See above. So, to answer your question ... That is a wager you would certainly win. Although the official count is 15,003, and the view from my front door is lovely but changing over to it's solid state as I type this. My nephew is at your alma mater, and any place that serves Bearnaise sauce with their french fries has a soft spot in my heart. I hope you enjoyed your birthday and wish you and Mrs. Ho Ho a blessed holiday season ahead!



Yeah, Ho Ho Tai has exceeded his storage space and is well past his use-by date as well. 

I PMed you about UMD but forgot to respond to the birthday part. I have already cluttered up the board with pre and post birthday descriptions and, yes, it was wonderful - and I'll probably never do it again, at least this side of the cemetery, where many friends repose already, with new arrivals all the time.

I mentioned our 93 y.o. saxophone-playing friend, Irv Williams, who came by and and added one more conversation to the many ongoing, this one spoken through his sax. I asked Irv if he would play at my funeral. Quick as a wink, he responded, "Sure, if you'll dance at mine".

Deal, Irv - deal!


----------



## CAMellie

I just got back from the hospital. Had surgery yesterday to both remove the empty gestational sack and the cyst-like growth that the baby was in that had attached to my left ovary. I feel such a profound sadness that it almost seems like I'm blank inside.


----------



## Linda

CAMellie said:


> I just got back from the hospital. Had surgery yesterday to both remove the empty gestational sack and the cyst-like growth that the baby was in that had attached to my left ovary. I feel such a profound sadness that it almost seems like I'm blank inside.



So sorry Mel (((((hugs)))))


----------



## HottiMegan

CAMellie said:


> I just got back from the hospital. Had surgery yesterday to both remove the empty gestational sack and the cyst-like growth that the baby was in that had attached to my left ovary. I feel such a profound sadness that it almost seems like I'm blank inside.



I'm so sorry. I wish i could give you a big, gentle (post-op) hug.


----------



## Deven

CAMellie said:


> I just got back from the hospital. Had surgery yesterday to both remove the empty gestational sack and the cyst-like growth that the baby was in that had attached to my left ovary. I feel such a profound sadness that it almost seems like I'm blank inside.



I'm so sorry. I can't imagine the pain you're in, emotionally and physically. *hugs*


My post:

My brother, who had seemingly changed, went super violent last night. He can't control his rage, and it's so sad. It's so sad that I'm watching my brother self destruct. I was the punching bag for some of his rage last night, and lemme tell you: I was terrified. The night ended with him threatening me, broken storm windows, me sleeping with a knife under my pillow, and a lot of broken promises.

I love my brother... I just don't like the monster he becomes.


----------



## CastingPearls

CAMellie said:


> I just got back from the hospital. Had surgery yesterday to both remove the empty gestational sack and the cyst-like growth that the baby was in that had attached to my left ovary. I feel such a profound sadness that it almost seems like I'm blank inside.


Mel, I'm so so sorry. Hugs.


----------



## CAMellie

I just wanted to take a moment to say thank you to everyone who has expressed their condolences. I'm still EXTREMELY emotionally numb right now. I don't know what I'm going to do when all of this sinks in.


----------



## Weirdo890

Not really sad, but melancholy. A bit lonely is all.


----------



## Ruffie

CAMellie said:


> I just got back from the hospital. Had surgery yesterday to both remove the empty gestational sack and the cyst-like growth that the baby was in that had attached to my left ovary. I feel such a profound sadness that it almost seems like I'm blank inside.



I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Take care of each other and know that there are many of us that are sending our love to you.


----------



## Mishty

My throat is so sore I can't eat or talk. 
I'm cramping and shivering,even under my electric blanket.
My friend used professional dye on my hair,and burned my neck.

I just wanna crawl under something and not even think about re-entering the world till Spring. :sad:


----------



## moore2me

Deven said:


> I'm so sorry. I can't imagine the pain you're in, emotionally and physically. *hugs*
> 
> 
> My post:
> 
> My brother, who had seemingly changed, went super violent last night. He can't control his rage, and it's so sad. It's so sad that I'm watching my brother self destruct. I was the punching bag for some of his rage last night, and lemme tell you: I was terrified. The night ended with him threatening me, broken storm windows, me sleeping with a knife under my pillow, and a lot of broken promises.
> 
> I love my brother... I just don't like the monster he becomes.



Deven,

This malestorm you described last night is no way for you to live.* You do not owe it to your brother to undergo this kind of torture. If he was in his right mind he would not do this to you. You need to have him either committed to a psychiatric ward of a hospital or arrested by the police. If you cannot do either, you leave the house and call 911 and get him taken out to a safe place and restrained. Warn the officers of how violent he is so that they and your brother can be handled as safely as possible.
*
You mentioned you slept with a knife under your pillow and I understand the need for self protection. But think of what it would mean if you had to actually stab him and he bled to death and died in front of you. This is something you would have to live with forever and it would haunt your dreams night and day. It would be horrible and it may make you crazy too. Please have him removed by professionals who handled people who are violently mentally disturbed. Do not wait until it gets worse. Do it now. If you need to call a lawyer, a priest, 911, a strong willed relative, someone who can help you do this thing, someone for moral support. Your brother needs help. You need help too. *You cannot do this thing alone - you are not qualified and this is very dangerous. He does not need you to be his punching bag - he needs to be physically and chemically restrained and examined and treated by medical professionals who handle violent patients.*


----------



## Lovelyone

CAMellie said:


> I just got back from the hospital. Had surgery yesterday to both remove the empty gestational sack and the cyst-like growth that the baby was in that had attached to my left ovary. I feel such a profound sadness that it almost seems like I'm blank inside.



This makes me so sad for you, Mellie. I was praying for you, and still am.


My sadness comes from the fact that my cat (my best friend and closest family member) is going to have to be put down soon. She is old and in pain most of the time, won't let anyone but me touch her, she can walk but cannot climb or jump, won't get up from wherever she is resting to use the litterbox, barely eats, and sleeps about 20 hours a day. She's been my constant companion for more than 13 years and my heart is breaking.


----------



## CarlaSixx

Im sad because its my birthday and Im lonely. Sick of being single.


----------



## moore2me

CarlaSixx said:


> Im sad because its my birthday and Im lonely. Sick of being single.



You are an absolutely beautiful and sexy young lady. You should be trolling for men that fit your specifications. Lonely? Single? Girlfriend - go out and take your pick of what's out in the world. You have what you need to interest and start a conversation with most single guys in the continent. Start with a sports bar, a workout gym, a sports event, a lecture that guys would go to, a rodeo or tractor pull, a weight lifting contest, a BBQ cook off, a church social, a dance hall, a concert, a rodeo, there a bunch of places to troll for men. Also ask your girlfriends to set you up with someone sexy and nice.

Think of finding your own man like this . . . . If you are hungry, don't you get you something to eat? It may be grocery shopping and cooking, ordering a hamburger, or finding something in the cabinet at home or asking someone to cook for you. In other words, you don't sit and pine for food - you actively go and get something to eat. 

I wish wish you good luck and happy hunting and happy belated birthday. M2M


----------



## CastingPearls

I hope that this coming year will bring a new brighter period of your life. I hope you not only obtain everything you need, heaps of what you desire but also a mountain of unexpected little and big joyful surprises including great love most especially for yourself. I wish you a happy birthday, lovely A, because you are amazing, fabulous, and sweet and though you may feel it now, you are never alone.


----------



## Deven

My Uncle lost his battle with cancer as of 4:45 this morning. He was diagnosed with jaw cancer a few months ago, but he had no insurance. When he did get insurance, it only covered one radiation treatment. When it came back, he was accepted to a Cancer Institute, and was going to fight it, but it spread to his heart before they could operate.

My aunt is devastated. It took her most of her adult life to find someone that didn't treat her like garbage, and now he's gone.


----------



## CAMellie

Deven said:


> My Uncle lost his battle with cancer as of 4:45 this morning. He was diagnosed with jaw cancer a few months ago, but he had no insurance. When he did get insurance, it only covered one radiation treatment. When it came back, he was accepted to a Cancer Institute, and was going to fight it, but it spread to his heart before they could operate.
> 
> My aunt is devastated. It took her most of her adult life to find someone that didn't treat her like garbage, and now he's gone.



I'm so very sorry for your loss. My condolences to your aunt.


----------



## CastingPearls

My deepest condolences. I'm so sorry about what you've been enduring lately.


----------



## Surlysomething

I'm so sorry. *big hug*




Deven said:


> My Uncle lost his battle with cancer as of 4:45 this morning. He was diagnosed with jaw cancer a few months ago, but he had no insurance. When he did get insurance, it only covered one radiation treatment. When it came back, he was accepted to a Cancer Institute, and was going to fight it, but it spread to his heart before they could operate.
> 
> My aunt is devastated. It took her most of her adult life to find someone that didn't treat her like garbage, and now he's gone.


----------



## Tad

Oh Deven, you are having so many things happening right now 

My condolences to you and your family, that is so sad--and so maddening when it might have been preventable


----------



## Deven

Thank you for your condolences. As sad as I am, I'm just so glad he isn't suffering anymore.


----------



## ChickletsBBW

well my reason for being sad right now seems pretty meaningless compared to a lot of posts however, 
I'm truly sad that I guess I'm not going to meet someone I was great friends with and fell in love with over a 5 yr long term online friendship with someone who chats here on Dims. Five years of friendship and the last year+ of supposidly being in love with me and wanting to meet this December and now I haven't heard anything from this person for a month. He has chosen to not say anything to me anymore although I know he still logs into here.
Just makes me sad that I spent a long time getting to know him and then fell in love for over a year and made plans to meet and then I get ignored. just sux. and trying not to think about him.


----------



## CastingPearls

ChickletsBBW said:


> well my reason for being sad right now seems pretty meaningless compared to a lot of posts however,
> I'm truly sad that I guess I'm not going to meet someone I was great friends with and fell in love with over a 5 yr long term online friendship with someone who chats here on Dims. Five years of friendship and the last year+ of supposidly being in love with me and wanting to meet this December and now I haven't heard anything from this person for a month. He has chosen to not say anything to me anymore although I know he still logs into here.
> Just makes me sad that I spent a long time getting to know him and then fell in love for over a year and made plans to meet and then I get ignored. just sux. and trying not to think about him.


First, I'm sorry you're going through this heartache. It's not at all meaningless, even by comparison. 

Second, it happened to me, with someone here, very publicly, and we were close for two years. We also made concrete plans, had a friendship for years, he vanished, etc. 

Third, although it's not the most comforting thing, or even barely comforting...it turns out that we're not alone. It's very very common. 

Take good care of yourself, please, and don't be hard or blame yourself. The heart wants what it wants even when our brain tells us the odds aren't good or whatever.

Big hugs.


----------



## CAMellie

The numbness has worn off and I can't stop crying. I can't stop wondering what I could have done differently to make everything okay. I know in my head that there was nothing I could do...but my heart refuses to listen.


----------



## Surlysomething

The immensity in which you have ruined me as both a woman and a trusting person is just sinking in.


----------



## MRdobolina

clear internet .. throttling my youtube stream of my fave holiday song


----------



## moore2me

CAMellie said:


> The numbness has worn off and I can't stop crying. I can't stop wondering what I could have done differently to make everything okay. I know in my head that there was nothing I could do...but my heart refuses to listen.



CAMellie, when a woman loses a unborn child like you did, the trauma is a miscarrage in its effect on her. It doesn't matter if it's done medically because of your safety (as in your case), or spontaneously (as mine was), or other reasons - a unborn baby died. Grieving and mourning is natural and necessary. 

It is part of life and this cycle of grief is something we go thru as women. It happens when we lose other loved ones - people understand this loss and can grieve with us during the time of this loss. The sad part of miscarriages, or medically induced abortions is that we often have to grieve alone. There is usually no customary funeral rites or gathering of the clan to help us with this kind of loss. Often other women remember going thru similar situations and have empathy with the dark place you find yourself. You are not alone, you are not losing your grip, you have lost a little life inside you. 

Unfortunately, the facts of nature are pregnancy outside of your uterus would have killed the baby and would most likely have taken your life in a painful manner and ruined future reproductive chances. You did the right thing. We grieve with you. We understand what you are going thru. Time may help heal your wounds.


----------



## kaylaisamachine

It's supposed to start storming for the next 4 days here in the Bay area. We're supposed to get more than 6 inches of rainfall each day. Streets are going to be flooded and of course I'm going to have to keep up with my classes for the rest of the week. I just wish I had Noah here to comfort me through the storms. *sigh*


----------



## penguin

I'm feeling very lost and down. I know it's the result of various stresses and events I can't control going on around me, but it has left me feeling like I mustn't be worth the effort or to be treated properly. Dealing with my ex is painful and frustrating and I have to shield our daughter from his asshole behaviour. Other stuff is going on that I can't control, but it affects me and I don't like how it's left me feeling. I'm trying really hard to remind myself that I'm a good person who deserves to be treated well and that I am worth the effort. But some days it's really hard.


----------



## spiritangel

Firstly so sorry for your familys loss Devon lots of squishy hugs


CaMellie also sorry for your loss. The heartbreak is immense no matter what the reasons are. Someone once told me that these things happen bacause the little soul who chose us is either not ready, or just here for a very small lesson and they got what they needed so no longer need to be here. I like to think thats true (I had a miscarriage in my 20's) allow yourself time to grieve and remember we are here for you.

Surly I know how hard it is to overcome the level of anger, hurt and betrayal but one day the sun will shine again in your world even if you cant see the end of the very dark tunnel yet




hugs Kyla try and stay dry and make sure to remember if you are going to drown its ok to skip class.


Pengiun You are AMAZING!! It is very very hard when you have a shit of an ex and you have to try and not let that hurt your child. I know I have been through it twice with my nieces both of their fathers went off had kids with other women and they no longer exist to them. I know it hurts the girls but sometimes I think its better than how they get treated when they were with them.

You are doing the best you can, Ammie is an AMAZING child and that is thanks to her talented beautiful mother. Never doubt your worth. If nothing else your Daughter does not doubt your worth!!

If you are constantly bombarded with the idea your not good enough by so called well meaning ( I really want you to tell them all to f off but I know you probably can't) people remember what you see in others is a reflection of what you have in yourself. So they are feeling inferior and my bet is they are very jelous of how well you are handling life and trying to rob you of any happiness or momentum you have gained the old misery loves company. 

Lots of hugs. Stay strong and Remember you are Penguin Sexy, Beautiful, Intelligent and creative. And if all else fails think what would the Dr Do?


----------



## Diana_Prince245

CAMellie and Devon, I'm sending hugs, kitty purrs, thoughts and prayers your way. That's a lot of pain to have to work through. I wish you both all the best.


----------



## Ruffie

It just floors me that so many good people could be going through so many trying times. Sending all of you a virtual hug!


----------



## Surlysomething

Thanks. Trying my best and putting one foot in front of the other every day.






spiritangel said:


> Surly I know how hard it is to overcome the level of anger, hurt and betrayal but one day the sun will shine again in your world even if you cant see the end of the very dark tunnel yet


----------



## moore2me

Deven said:


> My Uncle lost his battle with cancer as of 4:45 this morning. He was diagnosed with jaw cancer a few months ago, but he had no insurance. When he did get insurance, it only covered one radiation treatment. When it came back, he was accepted to a Cancer Institute, and was going to fight it, but it spread to his heart before they could operate.
> 
> My aunt is devastated. It took her most of her adult life to find someone that didn't treat her like garbage, and now he's gone.



Deven, 

I am sorry to hear about the death of your Uncle. Not having the proper insurance is a bi*ch and is no way to treat human beings - we should have more charity and kindness toward our fellow men and women than to force them to die early deaths like that. A good friend of mine died from the same thing and he was only about 40 when we lost him. It was a bad death in that they kept cutting off part of his jaw trying to prolong his life - he didn't gain much time by doing this. The sad part, my friend never smoked, chewed or dipped tobacco products. I hope you uncle and aunt did not have to go thru too much pain during their battle with this horrible disease.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Changing the subject back to your brother, I am writing you an email with additional details on this. There is something I want to make public tho - when I wrote to you, I mistakenly thought you were a man. My next door neighbor is a guy named Deven and it was an honest mistake.

I did some research and looked at your profile and was surprised that you are a lovely young lady! The difference in what I would have written is that man on man violence is one thing - man on woman violence is totally unacceptable. You should never tolerate it as an adult woman. This is much, much worse than you being a punching bag. *This guy can and may easily kill you. Or he will practice on you and kill the next woman. This guy will not stop beating on you. Once they start - it is a lethal habit that will worsen - you will get hurt more and more each time.
*
By law, the police will remove him from the house if they see evidence he has hit you. *You must stop letting him do this - you are worth more than this. You are not a punching bag. You area human being and you have rights. What he is doing is illegal. Period. Go to the police or Call the police.*


----------



## HDANGEL15

I had to put the love if my life, my beautiful cat down
Quite suddenly tonite. It broke my heart to hug and 
Pet him for the last time ever- here's a picture I took before
Putting him to rest. Xoxox my beautiful pumpkin xox 

View attachment image.jpg


----------



## Your Plump Princess

The upcoming holiday has me reminiscing on where I was a year ago, how for a very short while I was truly happy for the first time in my entire life, and has me thinking of all the people I know who were still alive then. It's hard for me to grasp still.


----------



## Surlysomething

I'm so sorry about your beautiful boy 

*hug*




HDANGEL15 said:


> I had to put the love if my life, my beautiful cat down
> Quite suddenly tonite. It broke my heart to hug and
> Pet him for the last time ever- here's a picture I took before
> Putting him to rest. Xoxox my beautiful pumpkin xox


----------



## Marlayna

HDANGEL15 said:


> I had to put the love if my life, my beautiful cat down
> Quite suddenly tonite. It broke my heart to hug and
> Pet him for the last time ever- here's a picture I took before
> Putting him to rest. Xoxox my beautiful pumpkin xox



It's never easy, and you have my condolences. Pumpkin was a very pretty boy.


----------



## ODFFA

Don't get me wrong, I'm not shattered or anything, but maaaaybe I shouldn't have just watched World's Toughest Towns - Cape Town  

Feel like I want to go take a self-defence class _now_


----------



## HDANGEL15

Surlysomething said:


> I'm so sorry about your beautiful boy
> 
> *hug*





Marlayna said:


> It's never easy, and you have my condolences. Pumpkin was a very pretty boy.



*thanks.....I am okay after crying my eyes out....i keep thinking of him little things all the time....so glad we had one another!!*


----------



## Surlysomething

I sobbed when I had to put my cats down. Every once in awhile I still get teary over them. But you're right..i'm so glad we had one another. 



HDANGEL15 said:


> *thanks.....I am okay after crying my eyes out....i keep thinking of him little things all the time....so glad we had one another!!*


----------



## Tad

I can still get all soppy thinking about my first cat, who moved on over thirty years ago. Pets really do always live in your heart, which is lovely except when it is agonizing.


----------



## CAMellie

It's been a week now since I lost the baby and my heart still aches like hell. My sister, my hubby, and the book Soupy sent me is helping, but my stupid head is still keeping track of how far along I would have been at this point.


----------



## Rojodi

CAMellie said:


> It's been a week now since I lost the baby and my heart still aches like hell. My sister, my hubby, and the book Soupy sent me is helping, but my stupid head is still keeping track of how far along I would have been at this point.



Sending the patron saints' prayers to help


----------



## TwilightStarr

My best friend found out last night that her boyfriend that she has been with for the past few years, has been cheating on her for a while now with his ex/baby momma.
And today is my best friend's birthday. I just feel so bad for her and I hate situations like this when you can say your sorry and be there for them but you can't make it all go away like you want to.


----------



## Lovelyone

the fact that my cat is getting too old to take care of herself is breaking my heart.


----------



## penguin

Unexpected bills wiping out my bank account and my ex still isn't paying child support, which is making me freak out about being able to afford anything for Christmas for my daughter. I've made gifts for my nieces and nephews, but I still have to post them off. I think I'm going to have to ask a friend if I can borrow money


----------



## Your Plump Princess

We would've already had the tree up, St. Nicks night stockings stuffed, and a mile-long list of shit we had to get for baking up Christmas goodies..

I know my dad is trying his best, but it's going to suck and.. that's hard to swallow, sometimes.


----------



## JenFromOC

There's some deep stuff on this thread, I feel for everyone, but in a way it's nice to know we aren't alone in feeling sad. Hugs to everyone. Every storm runs out of rain.


----------



## Surlysomething

I've never heard this before but I like it a lot. 



JenFromOC said:


> Every storm runs out of rain.


----------



## JenFromOC

Surlysomething said:


> I've never heard this before but I like it a lot.



I stole it from a Gary Allan song. It's country music lol...but you might really like the song. His wife committed suicide a few years back and I believe it's about his process of recovery. If you don't want to listen to the song, here are the lyrics 

"Every Storm (Runs Out Of Rain)"


I saw you standing in the middle of the thunder and lightning
I know you're feeling like you just can't win, but you're trying
It's hard to keep on keepin' on, when you're being pushed around
Don't even know which way is up, just keep spinning down, 'round, down

Every storm runs, runs out of rain
Just like every dark night turns into day
Every heartache will fade away
Just like every storm runs, runs out of rain

So hold your head up and tell yourself that there's something more
Walk out that door
Go find a new rose, don't be afraid of the thorns
'Cause we all have thorns
Just put your feet up to the edge, put your face in the wind
And when you fall back down, keep on rememberin'

Every storm runs, runs out of rain
Just like every dark night turns into day
Every heartache will fade away
Just like every storm runs, runs out of rain

It's gonna run out of pain
It's gonna run out of sting
It's gonna leave you alone
It's gonna set you free
Set you free

Every storm runs, runs out of rain
Just like every dark night turns into day
Every heartache will fade away
Just like every storm runs, runs out of rain

It's gonna set you free,
It's gonna run out of pain,
It's gonna set you free


----------



## Surlysomething

Thanks, I love it! 




JenFromOC said:


> I stole it from a Gary Allan song. It's country music lol...but you might really like the song. His wife committed suicide a few years back and I believe it's about his process of recovery. If you don't want to listen to the song, here are the lyrics
> 
> "Every Storm (Runs Out Of Rain)"


----------



## kaylaisamachine

I got the stomach flu today. Today of all days when I was planning on doing a bunch of research for my research paper that is due in two weeks, I got the freaking stomach flu. I've been nowhere but my bed and bathroom all day. Haven't eaten, just been drinking tons of water. I hope I feel better tomorrow because I can't handle anymore stress. :C


----------



## penguin

Everything.


----------



## spiritangel

I am so dissappointed that I will not get to see my Mum before Christmas its been 2years and this year we had arranged to go out to lunch but mums partner who is a really great man is to sick to travel so I have to put on a brave face and say its all ok because it really is not something any of us can controll.


----------



## MRdobolina

missing the box logo hoody drop


----------



## Oona

I'm sad because I have a 2 1/2 year old daughter, one that I was told I would never have due to PCOS and my weight. She's the most precious little girl ever. And she lives with her dad, 3 hours away from me.

I am blessed that I DO get to go see her when money/time permit. Not to mention FaceTime with a 2 1/2 year old is absolutely the MOST fun. But it doesn't change that part of me is missing on a daily basis.


----------



## qwertyman173

My grandad died last night...


----------



## AuntHen

qwertyman173 said:


> My grandad died last night...



I am very sorry for your loss and give you my condolences qwerty!


----------



## Lovelyone

qwertyman173 said:


> My grandad died last night...



My condolences to you at this sad time.


----------



## Jeeshcristina

qwertyman173 said:


> My grandad died last night...



 So sorry to hear that. My condolences to you and your family.


----------



## ScreamingChicken

I found out today that I got passed over for two different promotions. One I am okay with (it didn't seem like the right fight) but the other one....that one stings. It was custom made for me and my insiders said I was the leading candidate. According to my boss, the person who got the job has no background AT ALL in the field this job requires. She is requesting an informal inquiry in to the criteria used to hire this person and it appears she was not the only higher up who was displeased. 

It's nice to know my boss is putting herself out there for me. I am not going to lie; I feel like the wind has been taken out of my sails. I am pissed and numb all at the same time.


----------



## Ruffie

qwertyman173 said:


> My grandad died last night...


So sorry to hear of your loss. Take care of you and yours.


----------



## TwilightStarr

qwertyman173 said:


> My grandad died last night...



I am so sorry


----------



## qwertyman173

Thank you all for your kind words and messages. I'm feeling a bit better now.


----------



## Sweetie

qwertyman173 said:


> My grandad died last night...



I'm so sorry for your loss.


----------



## Sweetie

I'm sad because there are no do-overs in this life...there are so many things I wish I hadn't done in the past three years.


----------



## rg770Ibanez

All these setbacks. It seems like my pinky knuckle injury is going to be permanent. I know it sounds minor but for me it's not. This is not a good day.


----------



## Sweetie

rg770Ibanez said:


> All these setbacks. It seems like my pinky knuckle injury is going to be permanent. I know it sounds minor but for me it's not. This is not a good day.



Are you a musician? I know a pianist who injured a tendon in his pinky (he can no longer straighten his finger) but he has managed to continue to play in spite of it. I hope you can turn this around.


----------



## moore2me

Of all the experiences in doctor's offices, having a root canal on a tooth has got to be one of the worst. I have had about ten of them (having dental problems from taking medications & no fluorides in my local water). The worse root canals for me are ones where the dentist goes thru an existing crown, kills the roots, and caps the crown where the tunnel is. 

Doc said this one hurt a little more 'cause the root had become gangrenous and formed gas pockets inside. I had to have about a dozen shots to deaden the pain & nitrous gas too. A couple of times I almost went "feral" on them - it just wouldn't stop hurting. Now, I am home and nursing my wounds. 

And to make it hurt more, he gave me a script for pain meds. I went by pharmacy on the way home & they said it would be a 1 1/2 hours wait. I just came on home and used some of my reserve pills. One more pain - my part of the deductible was $375. Ouch! and a 1 1/2 week before Christmas.


----------



## WVMountainrear

Within 5 minutes of waking up this morning, I was informed of the sudden passing of one of my law school classmates in a car accident.


----------



## ecogeek

Not being good enough for the guy that I had an interest in has me a bit down at the moment. (In his eyes.)

My best friend having breast cancer.

My family all being overseas and it being the holiday season.

Other than these things, right as rain!


----------



## Sweetie

I hope you heal and feel better quickly. So sorry your hurting like that. 



moore2me said:


> Of all the experiences in doctor's offices, having a root canal on a tooth has got to be one of the worst. I have had about ten of them (having dental problems from taking medications & no fluorides in my local water). The worse root canals for me are ones where the dentist goes thru an existing crown, kills the roots, and caps the crown where the tunnel is.
> 
> Doc said this one hurt a little more 'cause the root had become gangrenous and formed gas pockets inside. I had to have about a dozen shots to deaden the pain & nitrous gas too. A couple of times I almost went "feral" on them - it just wouldn't stop hurting. Now, I am home and nursing my wounds.
> 
> And to make it hurt more, he gave me a script for pain meds. I went by pharmacy on the way home & they said it would be a 1 1/2 hours wait. I just came on home and used some of my reserve pills. One more pain - my part of the deductible was $375. Ouch! and a 1 1/2 week before Christmas.


----------



## Sweetie

Sad news...sorry for your loss. 



lovelylady78 said:


> Within 5 minutes of waking up this morning, I was informed of the sudden passing of one of my law school classmates in a car accident.


----------



## Sweetie

{{{{HUGS}}}}} Sometimes that's all I can give...I hope it helps. 



ecogeek said:


> Not being good enough for the guy that I had an interest in has me a bit down at the moment. (In his eyes.)
> 
> My best friend having breast cancer.
> 
> My family all being overseas and it being the holiday season.
> 
> Other than these things, right as rain!


----------



## Surlysomething

So sorry, C. *hug*



lovelylady78 said:


> Within 5 minutes of waking up this morning, I was informed of the sudden passing of one of my law school classmates in a car accident.


----------



## MRdobolina

lovelylady78 said:


> Within 5 minutes of waking up this morning, I was informed of the sudden passing of one of my law school classmates in a car accident.



sorry for your loss


----------



## WVMountainrear

Sweetie said:


> Sad news...sorry for your loss.





Surlysomething said:


> So sorry, C. *hug*





MRdobolina said:


> sorry for your loss



Thanks, everyone. I hadn't seen him very much since we graduated, but his wife is a lovely woman, and they have a 7-year-old daughter. My heart breaks for them.


----------



## spiritangel

Lots of Squishy Hugs everyone

Lovely it is never easy to lose someone we care about even if we are not as close as we used to be. Lots of hugs


----------



## seavixen

Lost my dad on Sunday night.

It's good that he's at peace now, and not suffering.

It's bad that there are so many _never again_s - I'll never hear him, see him, so on and so forth, again.

Miss you, Dad.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

seavixen said:


> Lost my dad on Sunday night.
> 
> It's good that he's at peace now, and not suffering.
> 
> It's bad that there are so many _never again_s - I'll never hear him, see him, so on and so forth, again.
> 
> Miss you, Dad.


I am so sorry for your loss.  *gentle hugs*


----------



## lovelocs

My hormones reacting with caffeine.

The knowledge that even though I'm the daughter, I'm going to have to do the majority of the emotional work, and have most of the maturity, in the relationship with my mom.


----------



## Lovelyone

seavixen said:


> Lost my dad on Sunday night.
> 
> It's good that he's at peace now, and not suffering.
> 
> It's bad that there are so many _never again_s - I'll never hear him, see him, so on and so forth, again.
> 
> Miss you, Dad.



I am so sorry for your loss. I empathize with the _never agains._ I found a 5 second blurb on a video of my dad saying "Hi babe" and I played it the other night. I felt like I had forgotten my dad's voice but it was touching to hear it again. My condolences to you and your family.


----------



## CAMellie

My sister and I had a HUGE emotionally heated screaming match. It ended up being very cathartic for the both of us...but it still makes me sad to fight with her.


----------



## moore2me

Dear Seavixen,

I am very sad to hear of your father's death. This is something that is very, very difficult to make it thru. Most of us do not want to make that journey either. My father died suddenly about 20 years ago and it is still vivid in my mind. But there is a ray of hope at the end of your grief . . . .

My dad still is with me in spirit and as a protector. I still look at how he raised me for advise and counsel. Sometimes when I get in an extreme trouble, I ask him to go with me into a disciplinary meeting, or face surgery, or help me decide to handle something he was good with and I am miserable trying to do (such as meeting with large groups of authority figures like executives or military officers). 

He also left a "trail of breadcrumbs" for me to follow as I stumble thru life. So, he has showed me the way to go and I believe he and others are waiting for me in spirit at the end of my journey. Sure, I would like to have him with me in person today, but he was ill and his body was failing. His diabetes had rendered him almost blind, almost deaf, his feet were numb and painful and the arteries in his heart - pretty much blocked. 

So as you say goodbye to your father, remember the gifts he left you and remember you can still ask his advice and have his spirit at your side when you really need it.


----------



## Sweetie

seavixen said:


> Lost my dad on Sunday night.
> 
> It's good that he's at peace now, and not suffering.
> 
> It's bad that there are so many _never again_s - I'll never hear him, see him, so on and so forth, again.
> 
> Miss you, Dad.



I'm so sorry for your loss Seavixen.


----------



## CAMellie

The massacre at the elementary school in Connecticut. I can't stop crying.


----------



## TwilightStarr

The poor innocent lives that were taken today in the school shooting :*(


----------



## Ho Ho Tai

CAMellie said:


> The massacre at the elementary school in Connecticut. I can't stop crying.



CAMellie -

I knew I had to respond to this event, somewhere. I hope you don't mind if I do so in this reply.

I just signed a petition, issued by Roots Action, on gun control, adding my personal note (shown in red) at the end.

I have two adult sons and five grandchildren. This could have happened to any of them. But y'know what? Those kids in Connecticut were my kids too, and yours. So are the kids in foreign lands who are mowed down by a IED or drone. And the sad parents of those kids (and the adults who were killed also)? That's me. And you.

*Petition:

I am not satisfied with failures of the White House and Congress to enact gun control in our country. I urge you to take action now.
*


*Personal note: There used to be a safety slogan, applied primarily to roadway drivers, but having far wider pertinence. Some of you may not be old enough to remember it (I am 75 y.o.): Drive carefully. The life you save may be your own. The same thing applies to how you treat your neighbor, how you raise your children, how you (who are in a position to do so) write the laws of the land, and how you treat the very planet on which we dwell.

And it MOST CERTAINLY applies to gun control and the ensuing violence we see when guns are too broadly available, and their owners behave in profligate ways.

Yet, what more can we expect in a culture which promotes violence in every other TV show? Which drives the poor to desperation with tyrannical economic bullying? Which kills the children in other lands with weapons more fearsome, and just as unpredictable, as guns (drones, for example)?

No matter how many rules get broken, the Golden Rule still stands. And what goes around does, indeed, come around.*


----------



## kaylaisamachine

In the midst of all this studying and working on my research paper, my battery to my lap top decided it wanted to quit on me and doesn't want to charge anymore. So not only do I have to preserve my battery by keeping it out, meaning I can't ever take my lap top off the charger or it will die on me, but I also have to hope that my battery has enough juice in it to turn my lap top back on in case it does get unplugged. My new battery won't be here until Thursday the 20th (or so it says) and that is also when my paper is due. D: Should I ask for an extension?


----------



## Gingembre

I don't know about the US, Kayla, but that wouldn't get you an extension here. Can't you just keep it plugged in??


----------



## kaylaisamachine

Gingembre said:


> I don't know about the US, Kayla, but that wouldn't get you an extension here. Can't you just keep it plugged in??



I'm at my boyfriend's right now, so tomorrow I'm going to have to unplug it to bring it to my apartment in which I'm hoping it'll turn back on. :/ Worst comes to worst I'll ask one of my roommates to use theirs, but I thought I'd ask her anyway. She loves me and even if that doesn't get me anywhere, it doesn't hurt to ask, the worst I'll get is a no. Plus, it overheated on me last night when I was working so I just gave up on it for now.


----------



## dharmabean

I don't get to see my son for Christmas. My family made a big to do for him. I have nothing to give him. I can't even afford to pay for a train ticket to have him come over the pass to see me. Whatever. I hate this time of year.

Instead of helping me with a ticket so we can be together, they all "bought him a bunch of gifts." and are demanding he stay at my brothers. Because, "Gramma said so."


----------



## ButlerGirl09

The general lack of funding, awareness/knowledge, and adequate services for those who are mentally ill.

At the very least, mental healthcare should be as accessible as guns.


----------



## Surlysomething

Weren't you gifting people on this site though? I would think you could have got him a couple things, no?





dharmabean said:


> I don't get to see my son for Christmas. My family made a big to do for him. I have nothing to give him. I can't even afford to pay for a train ticket to have him come over the pass to see me. Whatever. I hate this time of year.
> 
> Instead of helping me with a ticket so we can be together, they all "bought him a bunch of gifts." and are demanding he stay at my brothers. Because, "Gramma said so."


----------



## dharmabean

I give him gifts throughout the year, when I can afford it. Just as I have on this site. My frustration lies with the fact that he has told my brother, and my mother, that all he wanted was to come over here for Christmas. I don't need a "holiday" to purchase a lot of gifts for him. If they really wanted to help and benefit his desires, as they're portraying, then they'd help with a ticket. 

I feel as though they went overboard with gifts, in a sense, to bribe him to stay there. The train ticket, before the holiday, was 72.00 round trip. Now they want to wait until Christmas Day to have him come over, and a ticket ONE WAY is 168.00. 

Him and I both wanted him to come here on the 20th, the day after he's let out for vacation. I cannot afford to do it in the manner they want me to now. 





Surlysomething said:


> Weren't you gifting people on this site though? I would think you could have got him a couple things, no?


----------



## Surlysomething

I think you kind of missed the point.

And Christmas comes around every year so people do have the time and the ability to work things out ahead of time. 




dharmabean said:


> I give him gifts throughout the year, when I can afford it. Just as I have on this site. My frustration lies with the fact that he has told my brother, and my mother, that all he wanted was to come over here for Christmas. I don't need a "holiday" to purchase a lot of gifts for him. If they really wanted to help and benefit his desires, as they're portraying, then they'd help with a ticket.
> 
> I feel as though they went overboard with gifts, in a sense, to bribe him to stay there. The train ticket, before the holiday, was 72.00 round trip. Now they want to wait until Christmas Day to have him come over, and a ticket ONE WAY is 168.00.
> 
> Him and I both wanted him to come here on the 20th, the day after he's let out for vacation. I cannot afford to do it in the manner they want me to now.


----------



## dharmabean

I think you're missing the point, Surly. Let me quote for you again, "*The train ticket, before the holiday, was 72.00 round trip*. Now they want to wait until Christmas Day to have him come over, and a ticket ONE WAY is 168.00."

It was planned before hand. The decided today to keep him ON THE HOLIDAY. 



Surlysomething said:


> I think you kind of missed the point.
> 
> And Christmas comes around every year so people do have the time and the ability to work things out ahead of time.


----------



## Surlysomething

No, I didn't miss anything.

So painful.




dharmabean said:


> I think you're missing the point, Surly. Let me quote for you again, "*The train ticket, before the holiday, was 72.00 round trip*. Now they want to wait until Christmas Day to have him come over, and a ticket ONE WAY is 168.00."
> 
> It was planned before hand. The decided today to keep him ON THE HOLIDAY.


----------



## CastingPearls

dharmabean said:


> I think you're missing the point, Surly. Let me quote for you again, "*The train ticket, before the holiday, was 72.00 round trip*. Now they want to wait until Christmas Day to have him come over, and a ticket ONE WAY is 168.00."
> 
> It was planned before hand. The decided today to keep him ON THE HOLIDAY.


They're controlling your relationship with your son and springing this extra unexpected cost of the ticket on you. I'm sorry that you're frustrated and disappointed. *hug*


----------



## Dromond

Surlysomething said:


> No, I didn't miss anything.
> 
> So painful.



I don't understand what you're trying to accomplish here.


----------



## Surlysomething

Calling people on their bullshit.

It's tiring watching people work two sides to their advantage. You can't complain about situations that you could have had control over but didn't do anything about at the time. People need to be accountable for their own actions sometimes. I saw a theme. 


And to be totally honest, you didn't really need to understand.




Dromond said:


> I don't understand what you're trying to accomplish here.


----------



## Dromond

Surlysomething said:


> Calling people on their bullshit.
> 
> It's tiring watching people work two sides to their advantage. You can't complain about situations that you could have had control over but didn't do anything about at the time. People need to be accountable for their own actions sometimes. I saw a theme.
> 
> 
> And to be totally honest, you didn't really need to understand.



I'm all for calling people on their bullshit, I do it a lot, but I'm thinking this time your bullshit detector needs calibrating. As for the last sentence, that was a completely predictable response from you. It's like your trademark.


----------



## Surlysomething

So what? You don't think you're predictable on here yourself? 

She bought people gifts on this site that she barely knows and then mentions not being able to buy anything for her kid. Christmas also comes at the same time every year. Take some responsibility that you didn't plan right.

My bullshit detector is fine. I don't conjure up empathy for people who dig their own graves and then complain when they can't climb out of them






Dromond said:


> I'm all for calling people on their bullshit, I do it a lot, but I'm thinking this time your bullshit detector needs calibrating. As for the last sentence, that was a completely predictable response from you. It's like your trademark.


----------



## Dromond

If you like the view from your high horse, by all means stay on it.

Ha ha.


----------



## Surlysomething

High horse how?

Too many people whining and complaining about their lot in life and not doing anything to make it better. Or doing a lot of complaining about it when they got themselves there.

I take full responsibility for ALL the choices in my life. There's the difference.

Why do you think you're the end all be all on what's right and what's wrong to comment on here? Seriously.

I work my ass off. I don't get any handouts. I also have three stupid diseases going on in my life so don't think I have it all peachy over here. Before you go laughing at me for having an actual opinion and stance on bullshit, know who I am and what i'm dealing with.





Dromond said:


> If you like the view from your high horse, by all means stay on it.
> 
> Ha ha.


----------



## Mathias

Surlysomething said:


> So what? You don't think you're predictable on here yourself?
> 
> She bought people gifts on this site that she barely knows and then mentions not being able to buy anything for her kid. Christmas also comes at the same time every year. Take some responsibility that you didn't plan right.
> 
> My bullshit detector is fine. I don't conjure up empathy for people who dig their own graves and then complain when they can't climb out of them



Sure she bought gifts for people, but it's not like you know how much she spent and have a right to chastize her like she's dirt poor because she took part in the whole "Christmas gift" exchange here. You could try not to kick someone when their down and show some compassion for once, but we all know you get off on being bitchy to everyone here.


----------



## Mishty

I drank all the liquor,and wimped out ten seconds before glory.


----------



## Surlysomething

Really? The only time you talk to me is when you want to berate me. You know NOTHING ABOUT ME. You have a lot of growing up to do, little boy. People can't skate on their bullshit forever before someone calls them out on it. You can be the empathetic one here, go for it. We all know you don't do much for yourself except complain.






Mathias said:


> Sure she bought gifts for people, but it's not like you know how much she spent and have a right to chastize her like she's dirt poor because she took part in the whole "Christmas gift" exchange here. You could try not to kick someone when their down and show some compassion for once, but we all know you get off on being bitchy to everyone here.


----------



## Dromond

Forget it. Not worth it.


----------



## Surlysomething

You show me first.

I'm tired of users and whiners and complainers. It would be nice to see some people MAN THE FUCK UP for a change. You included.




Dromond said:


> You want empathy? Show some first.


----------



## dharmabean

:: note - I can only see what's written because it's been quoted.::

Work your ass off? 

1. I work part time as a freelance reporter for the newspaper.
2. I work part time as an MRI patient Care Coordinator.
3. I work part time as a Medical Transcriptionist.
4. I work part time doing the website/Facebook/marketing for a restaurant in town.
5. I work part time as a hostess for the same restaurant.

I'M WORKING FIVE PART TIME JOBS, busting my ass making ends meet. I am also registered for college this winter quarter. I am fucking proud of all my accomplishments. 

Don't even attempt to pass judgement without knowing me fully.


----------



## Mathias

You need to take a good long look in the mirror and your own self wallowing posts in this thread before you tell other people to quit whining. You've done your fair share.


----------



## Surlysomething

You don't know what you're talking about. 

Plus, it's past your bed time. Run along.




Mathias said:


> You need to take a good long look in the mirror and your own self wallowing posts in this thread before you tell other people to quit whining. You've done your fair share.


----------



## MRdobolina

this kinda made me sad


----------



## Dromond

Surlysomething said:


> You show me first.
> 
> I'm tired of users and whiners and complainers. It would be nice to see some people MAN THE FUCK UP for a change. You included.



You've got a horrible attitude, which reveals a person deeply bitter about life. It colors your reactions to everything. I think underneath it all you've got a heart, but you're so damaged you have to cover it up with a thick layer of attitude. I actually feel sorry for you, even though I know the sentiment is neither welcome nor appreciated.


----------



## Mathias

Surlysomething said:


> You don't know what you're talking about.
> 
> Plus, it's past your bed time. Run along.



Honey, I'm 24 and graduated college, no bedtime here but I'm sure there's a wine bottle you need to get to the bottom of.


----------



## Surlysomething

24 going on 15 and still living at home sucking on the parental tit.

Get over yourself.



Mathias said:


> Honey, I'm 24 and graduated college, no bedtime here but I'm sure there's a wine bottle you need to get to the bottom of.


----------



## Surlysomething

No. I have a REALISTIC attitude.

I live in the REAL world. Not the one full of handouts and hand holding. Maybe if people actually gave a shit about themselves and didn't want help at every turn it would be a better place. They would be stronger and more self-sufficient. Quiet blaming the economy and everyone else and grow up. I'm not sure why you feel sorry for me. I'm not the one complaining about being poor yet not doing anything about it.

I feel sorry for all the people that get suckered into all this bullshit. Including you.





Dromond said:


> You've got a horrible attitude, which reveals a person deeply bitter about life. It colors your reactions to everything. I think underneath it all you've got a heart, but you're so damaged you have to cover it up with a thick layer of attitude. I actually feel sorry for you, even though I know the sentiment is neither welcome nor appreciated.


----------



## Surlysomething

Now lets all sing Kumbaya.


----------



## Mathias

You're not worth it anymore. 

Sorry for the thread derailment people! Back on topic.


----------



## Dromond

I feel sorry for you because you are so angry all the time. That's no fit way to live.


----------



## Surlysomething

How does being realistic equate with anger? I'm not Pollyanna by any means but you're really getting confused here. And why are you even championing this? You don't have anything better to do than try and cut me down? Really? Who's the angry one?





Dromond said:


> I feel sorry for you because you are so angry all the time. That's no fit way to live.


----------



## Surlysomething

Typical.

I call you on your own bullshit and you have nothing to reply with. It's somehow ok for you to rip ME for ripping someone else. Funny that. Have fun not working tomorrow.





Mathias said:


> You're not worth it anymore.
> 
> Sorry for the thread derailment people! Back on topic.


----------



## Dromond

Surlysomething said:


> How does being realistic equate with anger? I'm not Pollyanna by any means but you're really getting confused here. And why are you even championing this? You don't have anything better to do than try and cut me down? Really? Who's the angry one?



My gut reaction is to toss out a snarky line like "I'm just calling you on your bullshit ," but instead I'll give you a serious answer.

It's neither your responsibility nor your business to bring your shit into a thread that's all about venting your sadness. You trip out about things that make your inner demons growl, and you have no filter to stop yourself from speaking out of turn. And while you are all too happy to call other people on their shit, you get defensive (to say the least!) when you are called on yours. You can dish it out, but you have no ability to take it.


----------



## Surlysomething

This is a personal attack on me plain and simple.

Boring. I thought you were better.




Dromond said:


> My gut reaction is to toss out a snarky line like "I'm just calling you on your bullshit ," but instead I'll give you a serious answer.
> 
> It's neither your responsibility nor your business to bring your shit into a thread that's all about venting your sadness. You trip out about things that make your inner demons growl, and you have no filter to stop yourself from speaking out of turn. And while you are all too happy to call other people on their shit, you get defensive (to say the least!) when you are called on yours. You can dish it out, but you have no ability to take it.


----------



## dharmabean

I would just like to state for the record that this is a thread about posting what's making you sad. I never once asked for a hand out, help up, or any of that. At that moment, the stress of my family and, as Lainey said, "they're controlling your relationship with your son" effected me.

I'm a fighter. I have my struggles, as everyone does. I will figure something out, even if it's him coming down later than anticipated. We planned, and we budgeted to have him come visit. The family's decision to make it later, costing me more, is the frustration. I budgeted to what I had mapped out via amtrak.

It makes me sad that they opted not to hear what he really wanted for Christmas, and instead are trying to dominate the situation. 

Think whatever you want to think.


----------



## Dromond

Surlysomething said:


> This is a personal attack on me plain and simple.
> 
> Boring. I thought you were better.



Oh? Like your personal attack on dharma?


----------



## Surlysomething

Hahahaha. Awwww, the sad sacks are ganging up on me.

I was told I was blocked but I guess not. 

I never ripped her personality apart or called any names, but you willl all see what you want. It's fine that you rip me apart, Dromond and this wasn't even your fight to fight. Way to go, Dad!

And a one and a two...KUMBAYA!


----------



## Sweetie

I thought this thread was just a place to tell what was making you sad right now. I didn't see anything about asking for other peoples' opinions on your right to feel sad. Why take a place to express your sad feelings and turn it into a place to attack and deride the other posters? 

THIS THREAD IS MAKING ME SAD RIGHT NOW.


----------



## spiritangel

That there are so many lonely people over the hollidays and all the services for them are shut over what is one of the hardest periods to be alone.

Dharma it really sux when someone changes all the plans and it ruins what I am sure was a very carefully planned out budget when they know that your on a tight budget as it is it is so thoughtless and mean spirited to pull a stunt like that so close to the actual time frame. Sometimes family can really sux. lots of squishy hugs perhaps you could celebrate with him after Christmas?


----------



## willowmoon

Just miss my parents, they visited here a couple of weeks ago .... it's been a week already since they had to drive back to Alabama where they live .... but, damn, I miss them and wish they could have stayed longer.


----------



## Marlayna

What is making me terribly sad right now, is the senseless tragedy of the children and adults who were murdered at that school in Conn.


----------



## CastingPearls

My sister Lisa would have been 40 on Christmas Eve. I miss so much of my family, but at this time of year, I miss her so so much there aren't really words to express it. I'm going to celebrate her birthday anyway. I know she'd love what I have planned.


----------



## Sweetie

CastingPearls said:


> My sister Lisa would have been 40 on Christmas Eve. I miss so much of my family, but at this time of year, I miss her so so much there aren't really words to express it. I'm going to celebrate her birthday anyway. I know she'd love what I have planned.



I'm so sorry for your loss ... {{{{{HUGS}}}}}.


----------



## Ruffie

Another day spend in the ER with my son in extreme pain from his back. The Doctor thinks its a herniated disc on the L5 but we have to travel tomorrow for a MRI to confirm that. Relationship problems for a family member and emotionally supporting them as well as moving them out of their place. Mom is getting worse as the cancer progresses and she turned down a room in a care ome so back on the list and starting over again. Am exhausted from dealing with it all and now dealing with a cold! I may be sad but still have to count my blessings and say that I am sorry to hear of everyone else's struggles. We are lucky to have support and a place to vent!


----------



## Victoria08

Wishing I was back home in England with my best friends. I haven't seen them in over 3 years. I don't know, the distance just gets to me sometimes and makes me a little sad. But, on the bright side, I have almost enough money saved to buy a ticket for next summer.


----------



## I'm Not Zoidberg

One year ago today I had to put my oldest cat down. He'd made it to the grand old age of 24 - in pretty good health other than deafness and mild arthritis, I might add - and then he had a massive stroke that left him blind, incontinent, and unable to walk. 

Shit, he was with me for more than half of my life. I should have gone to bed hours ago, but I just can't sleep. 

RIP, Jedi. You will always be remembered and loved.


----------



## kaylaisamachine

6 years ago today, I watched my grandpa take his last breath. I was the closest to him than I was in anyone in my family. It's been six years and every time this day has come back, it hasn't gotten any easier. I hope I have the strength to get through this morning and then I can come home and turn into a mess. I miss you grampie. I'm glad you're not suffering anymore and hope you are enjoying watching me turn into a women that I hope is great by your standards. I miss and love you so much. RIP. <3


----------



## Your Plump Princess

My dad told me "I realize I'm struggling with depression.. I sat in the bedroom last night looking around and said _Am I waiting for her to come back?_" ...I know part of him is, because part of me is too. When I let the distractions fall away, and let myself fully realize and remember my stepmother existed and all she has done for me, I just end up bawling. 

Hard. Undignified. Sobs.


----------



## bbwlibrarian

My friendships are all dying, and that makes me sad. We all grow apart, I suppose. Everything must die, I guess, before new life can appear.


----------



## That Guy You Met Once

I lost my job, my girlfriend left me, and I'm facing the prospect of being homeless in NYC.

All in three days. Damn.


----------



## Surlysomething

Holy crap, dude. CALL HOME and get your family involved in helping you out. Screw pride.



That Guy You Met Once said:


> I lost my job, my girlfriend left me, and I'm facing the prospect of being homeless in NYC.
> 
> All in three days. Damn.


----------



## bbwlibrarian

That Guy You Met Once said:


> I lost my job, my girlfriend left me, and I'm facing the prospect of being homeless in NYC.
> 
> All in three days. Damn.



I have been there dude... the triple sucker-punch, as I refer to it in retrospect. Call home, and get your family involved. It's better than the alternative.

Hopefully you can avoid being evicted.


----------



## EasyPeasy

Loneliness. 

Plain and simply... Loneliness is what is making me sad at the moment.


----------



## bbwlibrarian

My metamorphosis leads to the irrelevance of my present surroundings. May the people within it be well, but may they also let me fly when my chrysalis is complete.


----------



## moore2me

That Guy You Met Once said:


> I lost my job, my girlfriend left me, and I'm facing the prospect of being homeless in NYC.
> 
> All in three days. Damn.



As the other posters have said, it's time to reach out to family and/or friends for help. If they cannot or will not send help to you, you need to go to where they are. Most likely someone from your family will take you in until you can get back on your feet. 

You will need to get a job to support yourself other than drawing until you are established probably. (I too used to draw and paint, but if I tried to live off that money I'd have starved years ago.) And depending on someone other than a family member for means of support is also "iffy". I tried that a couple of times and the end result was really miserable and I wouldn't recommend it to any sane adult. Good luck with going home, if you're like me you may have to eat some humble pie when you get there, but you can do that too. May the Lord look after you during Christmas time - it's his birthday!


----------



## kaylaisamachine

I got the job, but I didn't even get a chance to celebrate because the next week or so that I'll be working there, most of the funds are having to go to a new lap top if I can even afford one. Mine is apparently not fixable. Something good always has to come with something bad for me. Must have been from breaking the full body sized mirror last year. This is just my luck.


----------



## Rowan

Still looking for a job...havent worked since March. I've had 3 job interviews in all this time....no one is hiring and it's really depressing.


----------



## bbwlibrarian

My friend lamed out on a birthday gathering.

This is why I hate being a December baby.

I'm going to start celebrating my birthday in June.


----------



## Surlysomething

Lame family and friends. What else is new.


----------



## Allie Cat

My grandmother broke her ankle and is in the hospital. Blah blah roundabout stuff, and long story short my Christmas plans with my family are canceled and I'm spending it in Pittsburgh instead of with my family.


----------



## dharmabean

Awe! I have friends who are Dec. babies. I LOVE going to their bday parties. It gives me an extra day to treat them extra special.

I'm sorry this happy, what a crappy feeling. 



bbwlibrarian said:


> My friend lamed out on a birthday gathering.
> 
> This is why I hate being a December baby.
> 
> I'm going to start celebrating my birthday in June.


----------



## BigBrwnSugar1

EasyPeasy said:


> Loneliness.
> 
> Plain and simply... Loneliness is what is making me sad at the moment.



You're not alone in feeling lonely.


----------



## Rojodi

My father-in-law passed away. I have a house full of people here to support my wife and her sister. We've pretty much have his funeral planned out, made calls to people to tell them what EXACTLY is going to happen, there will be no changes since they are his wishes.


----------



## Dromond

My favorite Aunt died suddenly tonight from a stroke. I can't afford to go back to Illinois for the funeral.


----------



## Surlysomething

Sorry for your losses, Roj and Dromond.


----------



## Dromond

Surlysomething said:


> Sorry for your losses, Roj and Dromond.



Thank you.


----------



## dharmabean

I am so very sorry for your loss my friend. It's such a rough time a year as it is for most, this is always hard to contend with as well. My prayers and meditations are with you. :: hug ::



Dromond said:


> My favorite Aunt died suddenly tonight from a stroke. I can't afford to go back to Illinois for the funeral.


----------



## CleverBomb

I'm at a loss for words here. 
My condolences to each of you, with my apologies that mere words, heartfelt though they are, can never be enough.


----------



## bbwlibrarian

My condolences for everyone that lost a loved one. I know that it's truly terribly to have someone die during the holidays--not that it isn't terrible the rest of the year, too. My great aunt died on Christmas Eve a couple of years back, and we had the funeral on the 26th.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

My condolences, Roj and Dro.  

Your losses honestly make my sadness seem a little paltry, but I have to share it nonetheless...

I am really, really sad to be apart from my fiance this year. He's all the way around the world, and with all the big expenses we have coming up it's just not financially possible for us to see each other this year. I thought I was doing okay with it (we're Skyping a lot and all), but this time of year I just want to hold him... touch his face... hold his hand and look at the tree with him. Even though I know I'll see him in a few months, it doesn't make it any easier. Though I feel so incredibly lucky to have someone so wonderful loving me from all the way around the world, it still makes me so sad I can't be there.


----------



## Blackjack

She's interested in someone new. That stings a bit, but what hurts even worse is the fact that it stings like it does. I shouldn't feel the way I do about this and have no right to have that jealousy rearing its head.


----------



## Oona

Blackjack said:


> She's interested in someone new. That stings a bit, but what hurts even worse is the fact that it stings like it does. I shouldn't feel the way I do about this and have no right to have that jealousy rearing its head.



You are human, it's normal to have those feelings, especially if you had good feelings toward said person. *hugs*


----------



## dharmabean

Oona said:


> You are human, it's normal to have those feelings, especially if you had good feelings toward said person. *hugs*



Definitely what Oona said, it's normal and natural to have those feelings. It's how you react and act with them that matters. I am sorry you're hurt right now.


----------



## HottiMegan

I'm sad for the families and friends of the firefighters that were shot while responding to a fire. What a shitty day for them.  I'm sad because society seems to be going down the tubes. So little kindness to our fellow humans..


----------



## moore2me

HottiMegan said:


> I'm sad for the families and friends of the firefighters that were shot while responding to a fire. What a shitty day for them.  I'm sad because society seems to be going down the tubes. So little kindness to our fellow humans..



HottiMegan, I agree with you that it is so sad the firefighters were hurt and some killed trying to help their neighbors. I don't agree tho that our society is going down the tubes - I think we are letting the lunatics run the asylum. We have got to find a way to keep guns out of the hands of man killers. 

We are smart enough to put alarms in tennis shoes, DVDs, and purses so that if someone steals them from Wal-Mart an alarm goes off. Why can't we figure out how to rig automatic weapons with an internal chip so that if a young, white male or someone within the stats of the typical psycho killer gets close to a weapon - alarms sound and don't stop?


----------



## TwilightStarr

I am currently suffering from the worst cold I've had in a few years! 
Before I quit smoking 2 years ago, anytime I got a cold it immediately turned into horrible bronchitis! 
So at least I can be thankful that no longer happens


----------



## Sweetie

TwilightStarr said:


> I am currently suffering from the worst cold I've had in a few years!
> Before I quit smoking 2 years ago, anytime I got a cold it immediately turned into horrible bronchitis!
> So at least I can be thankful that no longer happens



Feel better quick! Drink lots of tea with honey if you like it and have chicken soup...basically just make sure to get lots of liquids. My friend is getting over a bad cold and she took something called Emergen-C. I think it helped.


----------



## bigmac

More peeved than sad. My buddy thought that it would be a good idea to use my vintage Tandberg amplifier as part of his karaoke set up --grrrr!


----------



## SuperMishe

Yesterday, Christmas day, was the fifth anniversary of my mothers death. Today is the 6 month anniversary of my brothers death. I'm sad ... and sometimes can't wait til it's my turn...


----------



## Sweetie

SuperMishe said:


> Yesterday, Christmas day, was the fifth anniversary of my mothers death. Today is the 6 month anniversary of my brothers death. I'm sad ... and sometimes can't wait til it's my turn...



I'm so sorry for your losses. I can't imagine how hard it must be. {{{{{HUGS}}}}}


----------



## TwilightStarr

Sweetie said:


> Feel better quick! Drink lots of tea with honey if you like it and have chicken soup...basically just make sure to get lots of liquids. My friend is getting over a bad cold and she took something called Emergen-C. I think it helped.



Thanks  
I'll never have a problem with liquids, I drink big glasses of ice water all day, everyday anyway lol 
A friend of mine uses EmergenC too but I have allergies to acidic stuff so I don't know but I'm definitely going to check it out.


----------



## Aust99

Just tried getting ready to go out and have dinner with friends and watch a friends gig but felt so bad about how I looked that I canceled... I've never done that before..... It makes me really sad...


----------



## Morganer

Kinda bummed that it almost isn't 2012 anymore. One year closer


----------



## Surlysomething

Don't be too hard on yourself. We all have crappy days and just need to move on and start fresh. 





Aust99 said:


> Just tried getting ready to go out and have dinner with friends and watch a friends gig but felt so bad about how I looked that I canceled... I've never done that before..... It makes me really sad...


----------



## Ruffie

Moms cancer is progressing and we had her in the ER yesterday and finally got her admitted last night. She had turned down a spot in a nursing home two weeks ago without my knowledge and so now we have to hope that a spot can be found for her as even with home care I don't think she can function at home any longer. Even after husband and I taking time off work to take her to Cancer centre on the 20th she cancelled that appointment and then notified us afterwards. My son has a herniated disc on the L4 L5 and have had him in the ER three times over the past month as its pressing on nerves so he cannot void his bladder and having numbness at times in the leg and he is off work so been helping him out with the grandkids and their household stuff. I am exhausted from middle of the night trips to get mom back into bed, doing her laundry from incontinence issues and other household stuff there as well as sons stuff. Work has been slow here for me and I have been offered a full time position starting January third with a friends business that has a steep learning curve which I have accepted but am apprehensive about with everything else that is going on. Our stove and washing machine died this week and we had to go out and replace appliances we cannot afford on the old credit cards and so the emotional, financial and physical toll is rather large. I just want things to start to look up after all the issues of the past year and think I will enjoy toasting this crappy year out and pray that the coming year is a better one for all of us.


----------



## bbwlibrarian

Ruffie said:


> Moms cancer is progressing and we had her in the ER yesterday and finally got her admitted last night. She had turned down a spot in a nursing home two weeks ago without my knowledge and so now we have to hope that a spot can be found for her as even with home care I don't think she can function at home any longer. My son has a herniated disc on the L4 L5 and have had him in the ER three times over the past month as its pressing on nerves so he cannot void his bladder and having numbness at times in the leg and he is off work so been helping him out with the grandkids and their household stuff. I am exhausted from middle of the night trips to get mom back into bed, doing her laundry from incontinence issues and other household stuff there as well as sons stuff. Our stove and washing machine died this week and we had to go out and replace appliances we cannot afford on the old credit cards and so the emotional, financial and physical toll is rather large. I just want things to start to look up after all the issues of the past year and think I will enjoy toasting this crappy year out and pray that the coming year is a better one for all of us.



It sounds like it's been quite a ride, Ruffie. I hope things get better for you soon.


----------



## Sweetie

Hi Ruffie,

Try to make sure you rest when you can. You're such a good mom and daughter. Your family is so lucky to have you. I'm going to keep you in my prayers to give you the strength you need to deal with all that's going on in your life. Remember that if you don't take care of yourself you won't be able to help anyone else so please make sure you do so as well as you can. 



Ruffie said:


> Moms cancer is progressing and we had her in the ER yesterday and finally got her admitted last night. She had turned down a spot in a nursing home two weeks ago without my knowledge and so now we have to hope that a spot can be found for her as even with home care I don't think she can function at home any longer. Even after husband and I taking time off work to take her to Cancer centre on the 20th she cancelled that appointment and then notified us afterwards. My son has a herniated disc on the L4 L5 and have had him in the ER three times over the past month as its pressing on nerves so he cannot void his bladder and having numbness at times in the leg and he is off work so been helping him out with the grandkids and their household stuff. I am exhausted from middle of the night trips to get mom back into bed, doing her laundry from incontinence issues and other household stuff there as well as sons stuff. Work has been slow here for me and I have been offered a full time position starting January third with a friends business that has a steep learning curve which I have accepted but am apprehensive about with everything else that is going on. Our stove and washing machine died this week and we had to go out and replace appliances we cannot afford on the old credit cards and so the emotional, financial and physical toll is rather large. I just want things to start to look up after all the issues of the past year and think I will enjoy toasting this crappy year out and pray that the coming year is a better one for all of us.


----------



## balletguy

Today I just have the blues for no reason at all....


----------



## Oona

balletguy said:


> Today I just have the blues for no reason at all....



Cheer up, buttercup! Its Friday!


----------



## balletguy

Oona said:


> Cheer up, buttercup! Its Friday!



Yes Friday is a good thing...just had a shower and now cracking open a beer im good thanks


----------



## Miskatonic

Job hunting. It's probably the most depressing thing on Earth right now.


----------



## Blackjack

Miskatonic said:


> Job hunting. It's probably the most depressing thing on Earth right now.



No kiddin'. It's a tough job market right now and the hunt is just so brutal to your soul.


----------



## Miskatonic

Blackjack said:


> No kiddin'. It's a tough job market right now and the hunt is just so brutal to your soul.



I don't want to go back to retail but f it I need a paycheck. The worst part about applying to a retail job is that questionnaire at the end of the application. "I feel angry sometimes, agree or disagree."


----------



## kaylaisamachine

I've been scheduled for four days with this new seasonal job. FOUR DAYS. Then they will tell me whether they will need me after the new year or not. I'm pretty sure I didn't get the full time position which sucks, but on the bright side, I now have more experience to put on my resume. If that's what you can call four days. 


Now to hope that I'll get a paycheck that's big enough to get (or at least help me get) a new lap top since mine pooped out on me. 

How do you survive in college without a laptop or parents who can/will help you pay for one? D:


----------



## moore2me

kaylaisamachine said:


> I've been scheduled for four days with this new seasonal job. FOUR DAYS. Then they will tell me whether they will need me after the new year or not. I'm pretty sure I didn't get the full time position which sucks, but on the bright side, I now have more experience to put on my resume. If that's what you can call four days.
> 
> 
> Now to hope that I'll get a paycheck that's big enough to get (or at least help me get) a new lap top since mine pooped out on me.
> 
> *How do you survive in college without a laptop or parents who can/will help you pay for one?* D:



Kayla, I did a little research and here are a few suggestions online - plus some of my own. One caution tho, don't pay a fee to anyone to get a computer for you.

http://www.ehow.com/how_4925826_laptop-college.html
 some colleges give a laptop free to students

 put a note on Craigs list and barter for one - examples might be baby sitting, tutoring, helping writing a term paper, doing other jobs that you feel comfortable with such as dog walking, dishwashing in college cafeteria, working in library refiling books, cleaning cages in the biology dept. (I mentioned all these jobs above because they were ALL jobs I had in college to earn extra money. My favorite job was washing dishes in the school cafeteria. There was 6 or 7 kids doing it and it was actually fun.)

 most colleges have reduced laptops on sale for students

Other ideas
 Write educational foundations, state your plight, ask for a laptop (Examples would be Bill Gates Foundation, Kelloggs Foundation, do a search for sponsors in your city or within your field of study.)

 Put an ad in the student paper (some kids get laptops and then sell them for money  they get legit money for a laptop from their trust fund and then turn around and decide to sell it.) Also check student bulleton board postings.

 http://www.ehow.com/how_5570804_laptop-computer-grant.html
 Talk to your schools financial aid department

 (Apple computer often assists with educational grants) http://www.ehow.com/how_2316088_get-grants-apple-computers.html


Visit your college's computer lab - especially the repair section. Make friends with the kids there. They might be able to steer you toward a deal or help you "roll your own" computer out of parts.


And if all else fails, there are rental companies in the private sector that work on a monthly computer rental fee (just like furniture, freezers, TVs)


Check with local pawn shops


----------



## kaylaisamachine

moore2me said:


> Kayla, I did a little research and here are a few suggestions online - plus some of my own. One caution tho, don't pay a fee to anyone to get a computer for you.
> 
> http://www.ehow.com/how_4925826_laptop-college.html
>  some colleges give a laptop free to students
> 
>  put a note on Craigs list and barter for one - examples might be baby sitting, tutoring, helping writing a term paper, doing other jobs that you feel comfortable with such as dog walking, dishwashing in college cafeteria, working in library refiling books, cleaning cages in the biology dept. (I mentioned all these jobs above because they were ALL jobs I had in college to earn extra money. My favorite job was washing dishes in the school cafeteria. There was 6 or 7 kids doing it and it was actually fun.)
> 
>  most colleges have reduced laptops on sale for students
> 
> Other ideas
>  Write educational foundations, state your plight, ask for a laptop (Examples would be Bill Gates Foundation, Kelloggs Foundation, do a search for sponsors in your city or within your field of study.)
> 
>  Put an ad in the student paper (some kids get laptops and then sell them for money  they get legit money for a laptop from their trust fund and then turn around and decide to sell it.) Also check student bulleton board postings.
> 
>  http://www.ehow.com/how_5570804_laptop-computer-grant.html
>  Talk to your schools financial aid department
> 
>  (Apple computer often assists with educational grants) http://www.ehow.com/how_2316088_get-grants-apple-computers.html
> 
> 
> Visit your college's computer lab - especially the repair section. Make friends with the kids there. They might be able to steer you toward a deal or help you "roll your own" computer out of parts.
> 
> 
> And if all else fails, there are rental companies in the private sector that work on a monthly computer rental fee (just like furniture, freezers, TVs)
> 
> 
> Check with local pawn shops



Wow, thank you so much moore! This is so helpful, I don't even know where to start. xP I will check out doing some of this though. You are so kind. <3


----------



## moore2me

Ruffie said:


> *Moms cancer is progressing and we had her in the ER yesterday and finally got her admitted last night. She had turned down a spot in a nursing home two weeks ago without my knowledge and so now we have to hope that a spot can be found for her as even with home care I don't think she can function at home any longer. Even after husband and I taking time off work to take her to Cancer centre on the 20th she cancelled that appointment and then notified us afterwards*. My son has a herniated disc on the L4 L5 and have had him in the ER three times over the past month as its pressing on nerves so he cannot void his bladder and having numbness at times in the leg and he is off work so been helping him out with the grandkids and their household stuff. I am exhausted from middle of the night trips to get mom back into bed, doing her laundry from incontinence issues and other household stuff there as well as sons stuff. Work has been slow here for me and I have been offered a full time position starting January third with a friends business that has a steep learning curve which I have accepted but am apprehensive about with everything else that is going on. Our stove and washing machine died this week and we had to go out and replace appliances we cannot afford on the old credit cards and so the emotional, financial and physical toll is rather large. I just want things to start to look up after all the issues of the past year and think I will enjoy toasting this crappy year out and pray that the coming year is a better one for all of us.



Hi Ruffie, You're right - 2012 has been almost more than your family can handle. I understand about your mom too, I am on a very steep learning curve as my mom deteriorates. She is the first of my close relatives to go thru the aging process really, really slowly. Everyone else was here one minute and gone the next instant. (My father died standing in line at a Wendy's restaurant.)

Now mom and my husband's brother are both candidates for nursing homes. Stepbrother is in one now at the age of about 66. I think mom will have to be carried out of her house by the police. But, I can give you a small piece of advice I used on stepbrother. Because I have MS, there is a probability I myself will need to be in a nursing home before most people. There is no way I can take care of anyone, I can barely take care of me. I told MrM2M if I need to go to a nursing home, so be it. I don't mind - really. I have worked in nursing homes and I know the score - it is in God's hands.

But, now here I drew the line in the sand - I told him there is no way hubby and me could take care of relatives if they become so disabled they need a nursing home. I told him that he needs to prepare mentally and financially for this possibility and don't be surprised when his wife (I'll call her Betty Cracker) has other things to do when the time comes. My mom (a retired RN) knows in her heart there is no way I can take care of her (like you are doing now).

In the Bible it says your responsibility when you marry is to your husband and your kids. If you are working a new job and your kid needs you and your home fires need you to keep them burning, your mom takes a back seat. I would sit down and explain this to her one more time since her evasion techniques are causing your family grief and trouble. Tell her you want what's best for her and you physically and mentally cannot do it. Make your husband and son stand behind you. If she keeps making unreasonable medical decisions, you may have to find someone to take over her durable power of attorney. But don't wreck your health being a galley slave. Be strong.


----------



## Oona

Visits with my daughter are never long enough. One of these days I'm gonna snag her for a weekend...


----------



## Sweetie

I'm sad because my son is sad. He hasn't spoken with his dad in many years and had hoped that his being sober would be the key to him being the supportive, non-TAKING dad he's always been. But, within a few minutes of speaking to his dad, my son picked up on dad's agenda. So sad for my son and for my husband too cause he just never seems to learn.


----------



## dharmabean

I just watched my son leave for the other side of the state. I had the best time with him. I will miss his face something fierce.


----------



## Weirdo890

I've been overwhelmingly melancholy and anxious. Nothing really specific, but there are a plethora of reasons. Mostly it's disappointment in myself for not being at the level of draftsmanship that I want.


----------



## penguin

Tomorrow morning I put my five year old on a plane to fly halfway across the country to spend three weeks with her father. The longest we've been apart has been three nights/four days, so this will be weird. It'll probably be harder for me than her, as she'll have plenty to distract her (half-sister and step-sister, plus lots of his family and friends wanting to do stuff). I'll be having my birthday while she's away, so this will be the first time I'll be alone for it since she came into my life. I also can't afford to do anything for it, and I really don't feel like throwing a party this year. I'm sure we'll both be fine during it, but it'll be hard, and I'll miss her.


----------



## Oona

Every time I get a "First Date" with a guy, there is never a second date (even if the first one went AMAZING).

We get through the first date, everything seems to be going great. They even text me when they get home after the date! 


Then I never hear from them again. 

-_-


----------



## averykennedy

How is it NYE and I have no midnight kisses coming my way? That's awful sad! :kiss2:


----------



## BigBrwnSugar1

averykennedy said:


> How is it NYE and I have no midnight kisses coming my way? That's awful sad! :kiss2:



Don't feel bad - you're not alone!!!!! :sad:


----------



## zbot19

Awwww Avery I am sorry  sad panda! Blows you some Midnight Kisses your way tonight! I hope you still have a very special New Years Eve! Big Hugs and Belly Rubs-Derek

BTW i sent you a reply message from the message you sent me.


----------



## Ruffie

Thanks to everyone who posted publicly and privately their support. Had son back in the ER today to get a shot for pain and mom still in the hospital. But they are both going to have to manage as much as they can on their own and with help from others as I start my new position tomorrow. You are all right I need to make a future for me and take care of me. I am only one person and cannot be expected to do more than I am capable of. Thank you for reminding me of that.


----------



## TwilightStarr

It's a long list right now unfortunately but top of the list is that my addict dad is back up to his bullshit & lies, my head hurts from crying so much, and even though it's been 2 years since I quit smoking, all this craziness right now making me want a bottle of jack and pack of marlboro lights really bad! :sad:


----------



## Surlysomething

I'm sorry you're feeling so crappy.  *hug*




TwilightStarr said:


> It's a long list right now unfortunately but top of the list is that my addict dad is back up to his bullshit & lies, my head hurts from crying so much, and even though it's been 2 years since I quit smoking, all this craziness right now making me want a bottle of jack and pack of marlboro lights really bad! :sad:


----------



## Weirdo890

I'm all lone at home with a bug that's draining all of my energy.


----------



## Oona

Weirdo890 said:


> I'm all lone at home with a bug that's draining all of my energy.



Ditto. It's the pits


----------



## Weirdo890

Oona said:


> Ditto. It's the pits



It would be a bit better if I didn't have to drain my head of mucus every five minutes.


----------



## Vanilla Gorilla

One of my brothers passed away today. Being a Mason my brothers or friends are anywhere between 21 and 93, so this happens more than I like.


----------



## TwilightStarr

Vanilla Gorilla said:


> One of my brothers passed away today. Being a Mason my brothers or friends are anywhere between 21 and 93, so this happens more than I like.



I am so sorry for your loss


----------



## TwilightStarr

Surlysomething said:


> I'm sorry you're feeling so crappy.  *hug*



Thanks


----------



## Vanilla Gorilla

TwilightStarr said:


> I am so sorry for your loss



Thank you, he was a good man.


----------



## Lovelyone

The weather...its dull and gray and just blustery winter weather that is bringing me down. I need some sun!


----------



## Oona

Weirdo890 said:


> It would be a bit better if I didn't have to drain my head of mucus every five minutes.



Seriously... I think that's what bothers me most!


----------



## HottiMegan

One of hubs high school friends died recently following some heart surgery. She was a couple years younger than him. Sort of reminds me how much older hubs is than me and makes me a little scared and sad. He's been quietly mourning his friend and all I can do is hug him and be there to talk.


----------



## one2one

Two weeks in an Aircast. The full length one. I get to manage that with multiple spine injuries and somehow try to keep it from making them worse. I am very, very cranky right now.


----------



## ButlerGirl09

Just completed a submission form for the A&E show "Intervention" for someone I know because I'm at my wit's end. It's really unfortunate that he's gotten this out of control.


----------



## Tad

one2one said:


> Two weeks in an Aircast. The full length one. I get to manage that with multiple spine injuries and somehow try to keep it from making them worse. I am very, very cranky right now.



Um, dude, multiple spinal injuries? What did you do to yourself?!? And with those sorts of injuries I'd say that a cast for a couple of weeks is probably the good news, could be so much worse. Granted, not the tiniest bit of fun, but considering the alternatives....


----------



## one2one

Tad said:


> Um, dude, multiple spinal injuries? What did you do to yourself?!? And with those sorts of injuries I'd say that a cast for a couple of weeks is probably the good news, could be so much worse. Granted, not the tiniest bit of fun, but considering the alternatives....



You're right, of course. Thank you for the perspective. Truly. Two weeks in a cast is not even close to the worst thing that could happen. It's just very difficult to find an elusive balancing point at which I can somehow navigate this without aggravating the other injuries, while making sure my foot heals fully because I need it functioning optimally.

The spine issues are a part of my life that I didn't choose. I know you didn't mean it that way and are really kind, bright and very thoughtful, so I say this with that in mind ... I didn't do this to myself.


----------



## Ruffie

Had to put down my dog Jasmine today. She could no longer walk more than a couple of steps and was suffering. Told her she needed to cross over that rainbow bridge and find Boogie (our golden retriever we had to put down about ten years ago that was her playmate) and go run and play and be free when I said my goodbyes. My head knows it was for the best but my heart is broken. 

View attachment 101_0484.JPG


----------



## dharmabean

The hardest thing ever to put down an animal! We had two pugs (over the span of about 8 years) that were put down due to parvo, and one aspirated during surgery and passed away. 

My heart breaks for you Ruffie.


----------



## one2one

It is a difficult and a very compassionate decision to release a pet you love from their suffering, especially when you will have to experience it in the grieving. I'm so sorry you have to go through this.


----------



## Aust99

one2one said:


> It is a difficult and a very compassionate decision to release a pet you love from their suffering, especially when you will have to experience it in the grieving. I'm so sorry you have to go through this.



Absolutely agree!!! Sorry for your loss Ruffie.


----------



## Ruffie

Thanks you guys the hardest part is when I come home as she always used to squeek and cry and make such a fuss when I came home. Although it was cute when I came home this evening we have Diesel my sons English mastiff staying with us for a while and he was freaking out as I got out of the car like she used to do and of course Buddy grabbed my sleeve in his mouth and pulled me into the house as always. The vet says that we did it at the right time as he had trouble getting a vein and she went within a matter of seconds so she was ready. I appreciate all the love and support !


----------



## Weirdo890

I"m sorry to hear about your dog Ruffie. Peace be with you and your family. *hugs*


----------



## Sweetie

Woke up crying this morning. I hate that. Horrible dreams all night.


----------



## Micara

I went back to the doctor this morning... and I have pneumonia. I've been ordered off work for the rest of the week, and I'll just have to eat it because I have no sick time left after calling off earlier this week. Bah.


----------



## Oona

Micara said:


> I went back to the doctor this morning... and I have pneumonia. I've been ordered off work for the rest of the week, and I'll just have to eat it because I have no sick time left after calling off earlier this week. Bah.



Ugh thats the pits. I hope you feel better soon <3


----------



## Gingembre

Boy troubles....seems like history may be about to start repeating itself once again.


----------



## Oona

Gingembre said:


> Boy troubles....seems like history may be about to start repeating itself once again.



Think positive, lovely! 

And if history repeats itself, that just means there is someone out there that is MEANT for you, not just _there_!


----------



## Iannathedriveress

I'm about to get a fourth gen. Ipod Touch to replace my 2nd gen. The one I have right now has been a big part of my life. It will be sad for me to depart it. To me, it was like a friend, help me with the little bits in life.


----------



## Sweetie

Ruffie said:


> Had to put down my dog Jasmine today. She could no longer walk more than a couple of steps and was suffering. Told her she needed to cross over that rainbow bridge and find Boogie (our golden retriever we had to put down about ten years ago that was her playmate) and go run and play and be free when I said my goodbyes. My head knows it was for the best but my heart is broken.



I'm so sorry Ruffie. She was beautiful.


----------



## x0emnem0x

Ruffie said:


> Had to put down my dog Jasmine today. She could no longer walk more than a couple of steps and was suffering. Told her she needed to cross over that rainbow bridge and find Boogie (our golden retriever we had to put down about ten years ago that was her playmate) and go run and play and be free when I said my goodbyes. My head knows it was for the best but my heart is broken.



Sorry for your loss mama, she was a beaut. She knows you love her. *hugs*



Sweetie said:


> Woke up crying this morning. I hate that. Horrible dreams all night.



I HATE THAT! It's like even though you know it was a dream it totally ruins the rest of your day. 



Micara said:


> I went back to the doctor this morning... and I have pneumonia. I've been ordered off work for the rest of the week, and I'll just have to eat it because I have no sick time left after calling off earlier this week. Bah.



That is sooo crappy. I hope you feel better ASAP! I'm just getting over whatever I was sick with. 



Gingembre said:


> Boy troubles....seems like history may be about to start repeating itself once again.



Just keep your head up and don't forget, hope for the best but be prepared for the worst.


----------



## CastingPearls

I brought my car to the mechanic thinking at worst I'd have to replace the radiator, at best, the thermostat. It's far far worse. I have to replace the head gasket and catalytic convertor. Even if I were to hold out on the convertor for a while, the gasket is going to cost me $1600 and that's a modest quote. I have no money, no credit and without transport in a remote area, I'm well snd truly fucked. A person can only be so strong.


----------



## Oona

CastingPearls said:


> I brought my car to the mechanic thinking at worst I'd have to replace the radiator, at best, the thermostat. It's far far worse. I have to replace the head gasket and catalytic convertor. Even if I were to hold out on the convertor for a while, the gasket is going to cost me $1600 and that's a modest quote. I have no money, no credit and without transport in a remote area, I'm well snd truly fucked. A person can only be so strong.



I'm sorry you're having to go through this, hun. I truly understand the difficulties that you are facing with your car. I was in a car accident a year ago and my car was totaled, Insurance took 10 months to pay out. That time in between tested me a great deal. Just know that you just need to keep your chin up! And vent here as much as you need to <3


----------



## Micara

I apparently gave someone way too much credit. Congrats on being sneakier than I thought. Have fun with karma.


----------



## snuggletiger

bummer Micara.


----------



## HottiMegan

Alex has a hernia. Scared about the money involved with the surgery. We have good insurance and the hospital stay/costs are 100% covered.. just not sure about the out of pocket for the doctors  (we have very little savings after buying the house)


----------



## Oona

I have no idea, but I'm sad to the point that I just drove around aimlessly for an hour. -_-


----------



## Lovelyone

I have come to the realization that I am going to have to put down my cat who happens to be one of the most loving creatures on the planet. It's breaking my heart.


----------



## Sweetie

Lovelyone said:


> I have come to the realization that I am going to have to put down my cat who happens to be one of the most loving creatures on the planet. It's breaking my heart.



I'm so sorry.


----------



## Micara

Feeling really down and depressed today. Trying not to cry.


----------



## Diana_Prince245

Micara said:


> Feeling really down and depressed today. Trying not to cry.



Big hugs from Idaho, lady!


----------



## dharmabean

Micara said:


> Feeling really down and depressed today. Trying not to cry.


----------



## Iannathedriveress

Stan Musial just passed away


----------



## Ruffie

Lovelyone said:


> I have come to the realization that I am going to have to put down my cat who happens to be one of the most loving creatures on the planet. It's breaking my heart.



I am so sorry. It is such a hard decision to make and having just gone through it with my beloved Jasmine my heart aches for you.


----------



## Ruffie

Micara said:


> Feeling really down and depressed today. Trying not to cry.



Nothing wrong with crying. It can be very cleansing and sometimes it is what we need to do in order to let go and move on. Take care of you!


----------



## Jeeshcristina

Oona said:


> I have no idea, but I'm sad to the point that I just drove around aimlessly for an hour. -_-



I also did that last night. I feel like I'm going to just explode into a million pieces of fat confetti ifI don't calm the eff down. 

Sorry to hear you had a rough night too.


----------



## Oona

Jeeshcristina said:


> I also did that last night. I feel like I'm going to just explode into a million pieces of fat confetti ifI don't calm the eff down.
> 
> Sorry to hear you had a rough night too.



I survived, thankfully. I still don't know what caused it though. I think that's the worst part.


----------



## Micara

My life. I always end up ruining everything. I wonder why I sabotage myself like this?


----------



## Sweetie

I'm sad because I went on a date and I feel like I was a disaster. I am old-fashioned and people today are looking for sex when they don't even know me. I felt horrible and almost like an escort. At least kiss me before you pursue sexual favors. I guess I'll stay alone cause I don't think I can handle dating if that's what its going to be like.


----------



## Pandasaur

I feel a bit sad right now, I found out that I didn't get the job that I was so pumped up about, but I was told that they are considering me for another position but it could take weeks. 

I just feel discouraged but I'm trying not to let it get me down...I am thankful that I actually do have a job but I'm just not happy at all...

Hope I get a call back from the other positions I applied for sometime soon..


----------



## Gingembre

It's my birthday and so far its been a complete disaster. Worst birthday ever. :-(


----------



## firefly

Micara said:


> My life. I always end up ruining everything. I wonder why I sabotage myself like this?



Am I allowed to second that?

And I hate myself for beeing so dependent on what other people think of me - self esteem seems to be something I don't have...


----------



## AuntHen

Gingembre said:


> It's my birthday and so far its been a complete disaster. Worst birthday ever. :-(



awww, hope it get soo much better Laura! Happy happy birthday to you sweet girl :wubu:


----------



## kaylaisamachine

Gingembre said:


> It's my birthday and so far its been a complete disaster. Worst birthday ever. :-(



Happy birthday even though you're having a shitty one. :C Take it away from the equation, whatever it may be so you can start enjoying it!


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Gingembre said:


> It's my birthday and so far its been a complete disaster. Worst birthday ever. :-(



I am so sorry.  You deserve a wonderful one. I hope it somehow got salvaged. If not, come visit and we'll go out on the town!


----------



## Pandasaur

The thought of staying at this job I can't stand. I put out 5 other applications this weekend..I'm going to keep at it...I just need to be patient


----------



## CAMellie

I got into a knock-down drag-ass fistfight with my sister Thursday. That morning we (me, my sister, and my husband) were on our way to my psychiatrist's appointment. We were getting on the lightrail train when some random woman told my sister to "Hurry your slow ass up, bitch!" My sister has bone cancer and was being assisted onto the train by my husband. I heard what the woman said and confirmed with my sister that I really heard what I heard. I then told the stupid bitch that she had better watch how she talks to my cancer-ridden sister or I was gonna beat her ass. The women announced that she was going to request that the train driver contact the authorities and my sister jumped up to go after her. At the same time, my husband (who I have never seen yell at a person let alone put hands on them) threw his full bottle of soda at the woman, ran past my sister, shoved the woman, and started screaming at her about not having the right to talk to someone with cancer the way she did. I dropped everything, chased down and dragged my husband away once I saw that the train driver was dealing with my sister and the woman. We had to get off the train and wait for the police...yes my husband knew what he did was wrong and didn't argue it in the slightest. EMTs were called in because of my sister's pain and a gash I had in my arm. We refused an ambulance ride and chose instead to take the bus to the hospital instead. However, once we got off at the transfer stop for the bus to the hospital, my sister collapsed and started having what was later diagnosed as a series of stress-induced seizures. They refused to let me ride in the ambulance with her and made us take her purse and jacket. It wasn't until we finally made it to our intended hospital that we found out that the ambulance had taken her to a totally different hospital that wasn't on a bus route. I immediately called my sister at the other hospital and she started yelling at ME because she was at a different hospital. I shook it off...figured she was just upset. Adrian ended up having to leave to meet my sister at home with the housekeys (I was still waiting to have my gash fixed up). I waited as long as I could but it was soon time for the last bus towards home and I had no other transportation so I left. On the bus ride home, I had time to mull over the days activities and became INFURIATED at my husband for putting his hands on a woman when she hadn't even spoken a word to him. When I walked into my apartment I pushed him and reminded him of a promise he had made to me in the very beginning of our relationship about putting his hands on a woman in anger since he was aware of my extremely abusive first marriage. I then went to my room to calm down but my sister (who had been given some powerful IV pain meds before she was discharged) came in to berate me for the way I treated my husband and that he had done nothing wrong and that he was her hero for sticking up for her. When I reminded her of my first marriage and told her that, unless a woman is actually trying to kill him, he has no right to put his hands on her...she screamed at me that my husband was too good for me and he deserved better. She then slammed into her room saying she was gonna move out etc etc etc. I grabbed a smoke and was almost out the front door when she stormed into the hallway and called me a cunt. Cunt was my first husband's favorite insult (which my sister is VERY aware of) so I started towards her for what I thought would be a screaming match. She swung at me instead so I pushed her. She started throwing punches so I knocked her down, and started swinging on her. I let her up and she threw cunt out one more time so I punched her square in the mouth and busted her lips open. She called the cops who pretty much laughed because it was a fight between 2 sisters that didn't involve weapons.
We ended up making up in the morning but I'm sad that things went so far...I'm sad that my sister thinks it's okay for a man to put his hands on a woman in anger, I'm sad that now my husband has to go to court for what he did...and I'm saddest of all that there is now a rift between me and my sister.


----------



## ODFFA

Sweetie said:


> I'm sad because I went on a date and I feel like I was a disaster. I am old-fashioned and people today are looking for sex when they don't even know me. I felt horrible and almost like an escort. At least kiss me before you pursue sexual favors. I guess I'll stay alone cause I don't think I can handle dating if that's what its going to be like.



I can't tell you how much I identify with this. There _are_ people out there looking to form true connections - granted, they seem pretty few and far between, but they are there. Just know you're not alone in having those frustrations *huuugs!*

I honestly know it's silly, but a myriad of insecurities are using my brain as a mosh pit right now. This is the basic feeling.
View attachment 106549


That damn cloud's taking its sweet time to lift. I know it will though... eventually


----------



## Lovelyone

ODFFA said:


> snipped...I
> I honestly know it's silly, but a myriad of insecurities are using my brain as a mosh pit right now. This is the basic feeling.
> View attachment 106549
> 
> 
> That damn cloud's taking its sweet time to lift. I know it will though... eventually



And I can't tell you how much I identify with this right now. I used to think I was a very secure person until I started posting on these forums. I realize now that I am insecure and that causes me to always re-evaluate and calculate the end outcome of everything. I kinda wish I wasn't like this because it keeps me from enjoying a lot of things.


----------



## Gingembre

fat9276 said:


> awww, hope it get soo much better Laura! Happy happy birthday to you sweet girl :wubu:





kaylaisamachine said:


> Happy birthday even though you're having a shitty one. :C Take it away from the equation, whatever it may be so you can start enjoying it!





BigBeautifulMe said:


> I am so sorry.  You deserve a wonderful one. I hope it somehow got salvaged. If not, come visit and we'll go out on the town!




Thanks gals.  It sorta got salvaged, but not really. Oh well, they'll be another one next year.


----------



## ODFFA

Lovelyone said:


> And I can't tell you how much I identify with this right now. I used to think I was a very secure person until I started posting on these forums. I realize now that I am insecure and that causes me to always re-evaluate and calculate the end outcome of everything. I kinda wish I wasn't like this because it keeps me from enjoying a lot of things.



It does that indeed. I was a bit iffy on posting such vague negativity, but I'm so glad I did now. For one, I'm reminded again that I'm not alone  (thank you!) and also, posting that realllly made me think about some things. It's so unhelpful to keep comparing yourself to others. We all do it, though to various degrees. 

I've realised I need to learn how to sincerely ask the question "what do I really think?" instead of "what would/will they think?" and to sincerely _trust_ the answer. I'm not sure how to do that yet, but I'll try until I get there. Goodness knows, it's about time this inferiority complex died a slow, painful death


----------



## Morganer

I have the kind of job where she tells me to use _handforce._ Hand force?? ...


----------



## That Guy You Met Once

Please, God, no. Please. Please, just stop verbally abusing me, insulting me and what I believe in straight to my face, saying I don't matter to you, and making me want to die. I loved you more than my own family. I trusted you more than anyone in my life. Please, for the love of God, at least tell my why. First my mother, now you. Please just make it stop. Please. This is too much. Please.


----------



## Surlysomething

5 years since we lost my Auntie Michelle. Miss her terribly.
It is also her second grandsons first birthday today. She never got to meet him

We like to think he was born today to ease our pain a little. He's an absolute joy.


Bittersweet day for our family.

RIP Auntie, I love you so much.
Happy 1st Birthday, Aydan. I love you very, very much! Thank you for bringing us so much happiness and that amazing smile...the same one your Grandma had.

:wubu:


----------



## nugget34

CAMellie said:


> I got into a knock-down drag-ass fistfight with my sister Thursday. That morning we (me, my sister, and my husband) were on our way to my psychiatrist's appointment. We were getting on the lightrail train when some random woman told my sister to "Hurry your slow ass up, bitch!" My sister has bone cancer and was being assisted onto the train by my husband. I heard what the woman said and confirmed with my sister that I really heard what I heard. I then told the stupid bitch that she had better watch how she talks to my cancer-ridden sister or I was gonna beat her ass. The women announced that she was going to request that the train driver contact the authorities and my sister jumped up to go after her. At the same time, my husband (who I have never seen yell at a person let alone put hands on them) threw his full bottle of soda at the woman, ran past my sister, shoved the woman, and started screaming at her about not having the right to talk to someone with cancer the way she did. I dropped everything, chased down and dragged my husband away once I saw that the train driver was dealing with my sister and the woman. We had to get off the train and wait for the police...yes my husband knew what he did was wrong and didn't argue it in the slightest. EMTs were called in because of my sister's pain and a gash I had in my arm. We refused an ambulance ride and chose instead to take the bus to the hospital instead. However, once we got off at the transfer stop for the bus to the hospital, my sister collapsed and started having what was later diagnosed as a series of stress-induced seizures. They refused to let me ride in the ambulance with her and made us take her purse and jacket. It wasn't until we finally made it to our intended hospital that we found out that the ambulance had taken her to a totally different hospital that wasn't on a bus route. I immediately called my sister at the other hospital and she started yelling at ME because she was at a different hospital. I shook it off...figured she was just upset. Adrian ended up having to leave to meet my sister at home with the housekeys (I was still waiting to have my gash fixed up). I waited as long as I could but it was soon time for the last bus towards home and I had no other transportation so I left. On the bus ride home, I had time to mull over the days activities and became INFURIATED at my husband for putting his hands on a woman when she hadn't even spoken a word to him. When I walked into my apartment I pushed him and reminded him of a promise he had made to me in the very beginning of our relationship about putting his hands on a woman in anger since he was aware of my extremely abusive first marriage. I then went to my room to calm down but my sister (who had been given some powerful IV pain meds before she was discharged) came in to berate me for the way I treated my husband and that he had done nothing wrong and that he was her hero for sticking up for her. When I reminded her of my first marriage and told her that, unless a woman is actually trying to kill him, he has no right to put his hands on her...she screamed at me that my husband was too good for me and he deserved better. She then slammed into her room saying she was gonna move out etc etc etc. I grabbed a smoke and was almost out the front door when she stormed into the hallway and called me a cunt. Cunt was my first husband's favorite insult (which my sister is VERY aware of) so I started towards her for what I thought would be a screaming match. She swung at me instead so I pushed her. She started throwing punches so I knocked her down, and started swinging on her. I let her up and she threw cunt out one more time so I punched her square in the mouth and busted her lips open. She called the cops who pretty much laughed because it was a fight between 2 sisters that didn't involve weapons.
> We ended up making up in the morning but I'm sad that things went so far...I'm sad that my sister thinks it's okay for a man to put his hands on a woman in anger, I'm sad that now my husband has to go to court for what he did...and I'm saddest of all that there is now a rift between me and my sister.



lol Jerry springer would be proud


----------



## That Guy You Met Once

nugget34 said:


> lol Jerry springer would be proud


----------



## CAMellie

nugget34 said:


> lol Jerry springer would be proud


Dude, you don't know me so back off.



That Guy You Met Once said:


>



Thank you!


----------



## CAMellie

A year and a half ago my sister was diagnosed with secondary bone/bone marrow cancer most likely metastasized from primary breast cancer. The hospital she was at in Ventura county didn't feel comfortable doing a mammogram on her because their equipment is old and my sister has saline implants.
Well, we went in today to a clinic that specializes in breast imaging. My sister has several "hot spots" in her right breast. One of which is bigger than a silver dollar.
I am absolutely terrified of losing her. All arguments and fistfights aside...she's my best friend and closest relative. I don't know what I'll do if she doesn't make it. I go with her to ALL her appointments since I have experience dealing with issues that my late husband had with his cancer.
She's turning to God to help her deal with her emotional issues, and I'm VERY happy she feels she has someplace/someone to turn to. I, however, am an atheist...so all I have is my psychiatrist.
She broke down in hysterics after her appointment and I made a solemn vow to be with her every step of the way. My husband and I even swore to shave our heads if she has to go through chemo and loses her hair.
Thank you for reading this. I just needed to get this off of my chest.


----------



## Pandasaur

Didn't get the job....had a long cry...revised my resume through the tears...ate a ton of food and put in for another job


----------



## Ho Ho Tai

Pandasaur said:


> Didn't get the job....had a long cry...revised my resume through the tears...ate a ton of food and put in for another job



Pandasaur -

I have responded to few, if any, posts in this thread, not because I don't sympathize (or - stronger - empathize) but because I seldom feel that I have anything helpful to say. I am replying to your post because, at age 75 and despite having a successful career overall, I have hit many a roadblock and (quietly) shed many a tear. Sometimes I have come up with a new job, and a new career path, overnight. Other times, it took several years and hundreds ol resumes and phone calls. But in the end, it all worked out. 

One of those career changes (that fell into my lap) resulted in meeting Mrs Ho Ho. Another, decades later, after crawling through miles of broken glass, gave me the job I really needed (if not the one I thought I needed*) and resulted in the simmering friendship with Mrs Ho Ho blossoming into full-fledged love, passion, eventual marriage, and nearly 25 years (and counting) of that ol' Happily Ever After stuff.

But this is prelude. What I had to do, like my daddy before me, is well expressed in the words of this song from the 1930s. You're doing the right thing, lady. Keep cranking out those resumes, cry a few more tears, have a bit of chocolate, and keep looking down the telescope of time to a day when you know you will be happy.

*Oh, you can't always get what you want But if you try sometimes you just might find You get what you need" - Stones





PICK YOURSELF UP
From the Film: Swing Time 1936
(Lyrics by: Dorothy Fields / Music by: Jerome Kern)
Fred Astaire & Ginger Rogers


(He)
Please teacher, teach me something,
Nice teacher, teach me something.
I'm as awkward as a camel, that's not the worst,
My two feet haven't met yet,
But I'll be teacher's pet yet,
'Cause I'm gonna learn to dance or burst.

(She)
Nothing's impossible I have found,
For when my chin is on the ground,
I pick myself up,
Dust myself off,
Start All over again.

Don't lose your confidence if you slip,
Be grateful for a pleasant trip,
And pick yourself up,
Dust yourself off,
Start all over again.

Work like a soul inspired,
Till the battle of the day is won.
You may be sick and tired,
But you'll be a man, my son!

Will you remember the famous men,
Who had to fall to rise again?
So take a deep breath,
Pick yourself up,
Dust yourself off,
Start all over again.

(song continues in similar vein)


----------



## Pandasaur

Ho Ho Tai said:


> Pandasaur -
> 
> I have responded to few, if any, posts in this thread, not because I don't sympathize (or - stronger - empathize) but because I seldom feel that I have anything helpful to say. I am replying to your post because, at age 75 and despite having a successful career overall, I have hit many a roadblock and (quietly) shed many a tear. Sometimes I have come up with a new job, and a new career path, overnight. Other times, it took several years and hundreds ol resumes and phone calls. But in the end, it all worked out.
> 
> One of those career changes (that fell into my lap) resulted in meeting Mrs Ho Ho. Another, decades later, after crawling through miles of broken glass, gave me the job I really needed (if not the one I thought I needed*) and resulted in the simmering friendship with Mrs Ho Ho blossoming into full-fledged love, passion, eventual marriage, and nearly 25 years (and counting) of that ol' Happily Ever After stuff.
> 
> But this is prelude. What I had to do, like my daddy before me, is well expressed in the words of this song from the 1930s. You're doing the right thing, lady. Keep cranking out those resumes, cry a few more tears, have a bit of chocolate, and keep looking down the telescope of time to a day when you know you will be happy.
> 
> *Oh, you can't always get what you want But if you try sometimes you just might find You get what you need" - Stones
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> PICK YOURSELF UP
> From the Film: Swing Time 1936
> (Lyrics by: Dorothy Fields / Music by: Jerome Kern)
> Fred Astaire & Ginger Rogers
> 
> 
> (He)
> Please teacher, teach me something,
> Nice teacher, teach me something.
> I'm as awkward as a camel, that's not the worst,
> My two feet haven't met yet,
> But I'll be teacher's pet yet,
> 'Cause I'm gonna learn to dance or burst.
> 
> (She)
> Nothing's impossible I have found,
> For when my chin is on the ground,
> I pick myself up,
> Dust myself off,
> Start All over again.
> 
> Don't lose your confidence if you slip,
> Be grateful for a pleasant trip,
> And pick yourself up,
> Dust yourself off,
> Start all over again.
> 
> Work like a soul inspired,
> Till the battle of the day is won.
> You may be sick and tired,
> But you'll be a man, my son!
> 
> Will you remember the famous men,
> Who had to fall to rise again?
> So take a deep breath,
> Pick yourself up,
> Dust yourself off,
> Start all over again.
> 
> (song continues in similar vein)



Thank you for this, It took a while but I finally stopped feeling sorry for myself. I should be thankful since I do actually have a job but it is making me miserable. I plan to keep at it, I have to...and pray that my supervisor finally retires or gets fired while I'm there. If not all well..I'll suck it up, keep looking and drink on weekends


----------



## ecogeek

I am sad at the moment that I have to return to work tomorrow. I grew up with only my dad. I cannot handle office drama among five women. One of the girls does not get along with our supervisor as she cannot take orders without argument. She causes herself a lot of grief and last week did so to an extreme. She then sent me an email telling me that the supervisor stated that she feels I try and push all of my work onto her. Of course instead of being baited, which is what was happening, I went to that supervisor to try and clear the air. This was all a lie, resulting in us all being called into managements office one by one to see if we had any issues. Since then, the girl who tried to bait me has been posting horrible crap about me on facebook and singling me out in the office. It makes work life hell. I guess on a positive note, management is backing me as they do not accept workplace bullying. I just hate to see someone lose their job over a misunderstanding.


----------



## dharmabean

ecogeek said:


> .... One of the girls does not get along with our supervisor as she cannot take orders without argument. She causes herself a lot of grief and last week did so to an extreme. ......Since then, the girl who tried to bait me has been posting horrible crap about me on facebook and singling me out in the office. ...I guess on a positive note, management is backing me as they do not accept workplace bullying. I just hate to see someone lose their job over a misunderstanding.



This is so hard to go through. Just, keep your head high and your wits about you. It's hard, but in the end, she'll end up doing it to herself. If she lost her job, don't feel guilty. One can only hope that she would use it as a method of learning. But, with people who are that dysfunctional and that negative, odds are it will end up being everyone else's fault with no accountability of their own.

hang in there!


----------



## ecogeek

Thanks Dharma...we were always good friends at work and spent time together outside of work. Just dropped a few hundred bucks on her 30th birthday to make it really special, which irritates me now. It's just that I have to draw the line and keep work and my personal life separate I think. If I didn't care about her as a person, this wouldn't be so hard.


----------



## That Guy You Met Once

So, I've been posting some extremely angry and profane, but also very vague, posts on here and another thread recently.

I'm sorry, and let me explain:

Up until a few months ago, I had this girlfriend. She was beautiful. If you look at my post history, you can find a picture of her in the "What Are You Happy About" thread.

We broke up in December, but I still loved her as a friend, and cared about her. She said the same thing about me, and that I was still her best friend.

Until exactly a week ago, we had a minor argument over politics that turned into a major argument about what she should and shouldn't say to me during minor arguments about politics.

She started telling me she didn't care if I was offended by anything she said, and she didn't care about my friendship, among other things. Later, I messaged her basically asking why, and she said that she didn't mean that - I mattered a lot to her, but she knew she was going to hurt me, and she was intentionally trying to piss me off to the point where I wouldn't come back, so she couldn't hurt me more.

I thought she was just being too hard on herself, and I kept trying to work things out. I was as nice as possible, I kept telling her I was willing to handle it as well as possible, and I was sure she'd be a decent person and come around. I was wrong. For a week, she ignored me, was cold, and made veiled insults. That was when I posted all those things.

Today, I finally got a chance to talk to her, asking what had happened, and if we could still handle this nicely and be friends. I told her that if she could just apologize and talk openly, I'd forgive her for everything, and we could work it out.

She said no.

I snapped. Called her an asshole, disgusting, that I was wrong to think she could change and be a decent person.

She told me I was the worst person she'd ever met and that when I moved to New York, which led to our breakup a month later, she was happy that she wouldn't have to be in the same state as me.

She told me she was lying to me the entire time she said she loved me, wanted to marry me, and dreamed of kids and a future, and she was just sick of me and wanted me gone.

I asked her how she could do that to someone, let alone someone who loved her more than his own family, for eight months.

"Because for me, it's a game. It always has been and always will be. I don't like people so I play games with them. It's like a cat playing with a mouse instead of killing it. Killing it would put the mouse out of its misery but playing with it and seeing it's pain just makes it more fun for the cat."

...

So that was that.

As one last "fuck you," I messaged her current boyfriend - she never knew I found his profile - and told him everything, what kind of person she is, and that he'll probably be next.

Despite that I'm posting in this thread - I think this would be too harsh for the singles thread alone - I don't feel sad. I don't feel anything except pure hate.


----------



## Lovelyone

My cat was put down two weeks ago and I miss her dreadfully. No one in my family can understand why I am still so sad about a cat.


----------



## That Guy You Met Once

She unblocked me and said she wanted to apologize and be friends, but that messaging her boyfriend was a really shitty for me to do, and I was the one who was a terrible person, not her.

Apparently, she explained, she didn't meant it and it was all an attempt to get me to hate her as much as possible so I could move on, because she could tell I still had feelings for her.

I said I was sorry for that, and telling her all those things, and we could talk, but I didn't think we could be friends, because we always bring out the worst in each other, and I didn't think I'd ever be able to trust her again. But I would be willing to talk things out if she really meant she wanted to fix things.

But she ignored all my attempts to talk for two days, so I blocked her.

That was a recurring pattern in our old relationship and friendship. Something like that would happen, I'd desperately want to talk, to the point of sending three messages a day asking her to respond - which I never would've done with anyone else, but I was in a bad place at the time - only to have them all ignored and have to wait a week to get an answer. So I was determined it wouldn't happen again.

I hope that was the right thing. Part of me wants to unblock her at some point and try to work things out, or maybe just once two months from now to wish her a happy birthday or something, but I guess I know I never should.


----------



## spiritangel

That Guy You Met Once said:


> She unblocked me and said she wanted to apologize and be friends, but that messaging her boyfriend was a really shitty for me to do, and I was the one who was a terrible person, not her.
> 
> Apparently, she explained, she didn't meant it and it was all an attempt to get me to hate her as much as possible so I could move on, because she could tell I still had feelings for her.
> 
> I said I was sorry for that, and telling her all those things, and we could talk, but I didn't think we could be friends, because we always bring out the worst in each other, and I didn't think I'd ever be able to trust her again. But I would be willing to talk things out if she really meant she wanted to fix things.
> 
> But she ignored all my attempts to talk for two days, so I blocked her.
> 
> That was a recurring pattern in our old relationship and friendship. Something like that would happen, I'd desperately want to talk, to the point of sending three messages a day asking her to respond - which I never would've done with anyone else, but I was in a bad place at the time - only to have them all ignored and have to wait a week to get an answer. So I was determined it wouldn't happen again.
> 
> I hope that was the right thing. Part of me wants to unblock her at some point and try to work things out, or maybe just once two months from now to wish her a happy birthday or something, but I guess I know I never should.




Some questions for you to think about.


Is it worth the amount of emotional stress and yo yoing being friends or attempting to sort things out will cause you?

If you keep repeating the same pattern how will you move on?

Why are you putting yourself on the clearance rack and trying to hold on so tightly to this?

What are you afraid of loosing here?

hugs its never easy to go through this sort of thing but some bridges in life are meant to be burned behind us this may well be one of yours.


----------



## CAMellie

Positive results in the mail from the breast imaging center for my sister. First oncology appointment this Wednesday. Terrified out of my mind. My sister became hysterical so I got her on the phone with The American Cancer Society so she could speak to a counselor. The hubby and I left the room so she could have her privacy. Whatever was discussed certainly seemed to calm her down. I just feel so sad and helpless right now.


----------



## Surlysomething

I don't think i've been this sick in years. Like since I was 18.

Pretty much think it's bronchitis. Been off work for 2 1/2 days. Can't see going in tomorrow either. My next paycheque is going to be horrifying.


----------



## Stuffingkit

I'm missing my family right now!


----------



## Sweetie

The younger (by 18 years!) guy that I have a mad crush on is going on a date tonight with a much more appropriate girl and even though I know its the best thing for him I'm still jealous that I'm not the one who would be the best for him. I hope she appreciates him...


----------



## Your Plump Princess

Lately I find I am reminding myself "A year ago, she was here. A year ago, she was here." and I'm honestly scared of how I'll feel when I run out of days I can say that [which is in april..]


----------



## Marlayna

Lovelyone said:


> My cat was put down two weeks ago and I miss her dreadfully. No one in my family can understand why I am still so sad about a cat.


I'm sorry for your loss. I understand your pain, and I hope in time that you get another one, if she was your only one.
I know it doesn't help when those closest to us can't feel or understand the loss of an animal the way we do.


----------



## CaAggieGirl

I wish I could be the type of woman that could be FWB and casually date all the time. I'm not looking to get married or have kids any time soon, just would love for someone to want me and only me. 

And I am not at all happy about turning 30 this year. I generally hate my birthday since it tends to be full of people being mean to me and trying to make me cry, but I am absolutely dreading it this year.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

My thirties have been SO much better than my twenties... Just sayin.


----------



## Surlysomething

Holler for your 30's! Loved turning 30!

(turning 40 was a little harder, but i'm loving it now)


:bow:


----------



## Morganer

Had to get off the phone! Ohh, we get along so well, I could probably have talked with her on the phone all day. Poo, poo, stupid cooking and rumbling stomachs and other time-sensitive tasks that have to depart us from our wonderous phone conversing! BOO!

I am happy that we will talk again soon.


----------



## CastingPearls

Got stood up on my first date since I left ex-spouse 18 months ago.


----------



## ClashCityRocker

the down after the up. just gotta be patient and remain centered for things to balance out but right now it's pretty annoying.



CastingPearls, as for being stood up, i'd like to apologize on behalf of that guy. it's equal parts asshole and cowardice, and being human, i've been guilty of both before. chances are he just saved you the trouble of experiencing these terrible traits firsthand.


----------



## Sweetie

CastingPearls said:


> Got stood up on my first date since I left ex-spouse 18 months ago.



that SUCKS. I'm sorry. I know the feeling


----------



## HottiMegan

CastingPearls said:


> Got stood up on my first date since I left ex-spouse 18 months ago.



Sorry your first foray got screwed up. He's not awesome enough for you.


----------



## HottiMegan

I'm sad because this weekend has generally sucked. Hubs spent ALL day yesterday on a bike ride only to come home and sleep on the couch and go to bed early.. so no fun, quality time together. Today hubs and Max had a huge fight and hubs hid all afternoon in the bedroom, leaving me to deal with the two kids alone. Everyone is grumpy and quick to yell and snap at each other. It just makes for a stressful space and i am, for a change, ready for Monday and them all to be out of the house! I don't usually look forward to the end of the weekend but I"m okay with it today. That's just sad. I usually relish in my weekends.


----------



## Oona

My roommates mom passed away in December. We went out to handle her final arrangements, but we haven't been able to get back out there to pick up her ashes (my roommate works 12-16 hour days, 6 days a week right now). They mailed them and I have to pick them up at the Post Office. I wish we could have gotten out there instead of this being handled like just another package.


----------



## CAMellie

I'm sad that some people are so stupid.


----------



## Morganer

I really hope they take this TV as a trade. That would be the best thing.


----------



## CAMellie

Today would have been my momma's 60th birthday. I miss you, momma. Happy birthday! :kiss2:


----------



## moore2me

CastingPearls said:


> Got stood up on my first date since I left ex-spouse 18 months ago.



Dear Lainey, Bummer about what the stoopid date did. (it seems to be a trait of several men, snakes, and jackasses.) He likely did you a favor tho by not showing up.

True Story - I met Mr M2M when another man stood me up. My arranged date (who I had met the previous weekend) and I were to get together at a popular redneck joint in the city. I get there first, took a table, ordered my favorite bourbon and coke. A little later I ordered another one, then another one. Not only was I getting a little flushed, the dude I had date with was not showing up and I was getting madder by the minute. Also, like a female shark, I also began to eye the other choices swimming in the pond.

I spotted a male I liked and we started making eye contact (I can do this best after a several drinks). He got up walked to my table and we started talking . . . Over 33 years later, we are still married. So getting stood up by a jerkwad (I no longer remember his name or what his face looked like) worked out pretty good after all. I'll let you know in 30 more years how the story continues to work out. :blush: :blush: :smitten:





Lovelyone said:


> My cat was put down two weeks ago and I miss her dreadfully. No one in my family can understand why I am still so sad about a cat.



Dear Terri, I am sorry to hear that you finally had to put your kitty to sleep. You know you did the best thing for her. You provided her with a good home, food and friendship for many years. In turn, she gave you her love and devotion. Good karma for both of you. 

Will it be possible for you to get another kitty? That may help patch the hole in your heart. I checked Craig's list in Southbend, Indiana and yesterday (2/25/2013) there was at least three free (or almost free cats or kittens).
Here's the link . . . . 

http://southbend.craigslist.org/pet/


----------



## Lovelyone

moore2me said:


> ...snipped...
> 
> Dear Terri, I am sorry to hear that you finally had to put your kitty to sleep. You know you did the best thing for her. You provided her with a good home, food and friendship for many years. In turn, she gave you her love and devotion. Good karma for both of you.
> 
> Will it be possible for you to get another kitty? That may help patch the hole in your heart. I checked Craig's list in Southbend, Indiana and yesterday (2/25/2013) there was at least three free (or almost free cats or kittens).
> Here's the link . . . .
> 
> http://southbend.craigslist.org/pet/



Thank you M2M and Marlayne and Diana for the kind words. For a lot of people the loss of a pet is just that...a loss of a pet. For me it was the loss of a best friend. My girl somehow knew when I needed her the most and always came up to me when the love was needed. She was in essence, like my child. Perhaps someday I will get another cat but for now I am just not ready to replace her.


----------



## Oona

Tomorrow marks the 1 year anniversary of the end of my marriage. And while I know its better this way, it still stings. And how it ended still haunts me.


----------



## Surlysomething

*big hug*

Lots of thoughts your way, lady.



Oona said:


> Tomorrow marks the 1 year anniversary of the end of my marriage. And while I know its better this way, it still stings. And how it ended still haunts me.


----------



## Oona

Surlysomething said:


> *big hug*
> 
> Lots of thoughts your way, lady.



Thanks hun. <3


----------



## littlefairywren

Oona said:


> Tomorrow marks the 1 year anniversary of the end of my marriage. And while I know its better this way, it still stings. And how it ended still haunts me.



That sting will ease as time passes. Wee hugs for you, Oona.


----------



## HottiMegan

Thinking a lot this week about may aunt-in-law. We lost her to cancer a year ago this week. It stings still like it was yesterday. Max still bursts into tears thinking about her. I miss her a lot.


----------



## Mathias

My sister was expecting, but we recently found out that she miscarried.


----------



## moore2me

Mathias said:


> My sister was expecting, but we recently found out that she miscarried.



I am sorry to hear this about your sister. Miscarrying a unborn child can be almost as devastating on a woman as losing a living child. You should support her in grieving for the baby and be prepared to talk with her about her loss just like you would a live child that died. This will help her heal in spirit. Her husband may need the same support.


----------



## Mathias

moore2me said:


> I am sorry to hear this about your sister. Miscarrying a unborn child can be almost as devastating on a woman as losing a living child. You should support her in grieving for the baby and be prepared to talk with her about her loss just like you would a live child that died. This will help her heal in spirit. Her husband may need the same support.



Thanks. We both talked for a while about it and while the whole family is upset at least it didn't happen very late into term where there could have been more dangerous complications.


----------



## That Guy You Met Once

That thing I've been putting off for thirteen years? I think I'm going to do it eventually. The question is how long I can hold it off.


----------



## Iannathedriveress

I drove my Hyundai for the last time. For 5 years it did a good job for me getting from point a to b.


----------



## ScreamingChicken

The Office of Attorney Genereal is taking their sweet time processing my fiance's child support payments and it is driving her crazy. Her ex has dug a pretty big hole in back support from being out of work. Now that he has the money and is willing to pay, they are dragging their knuckles. I despise seeing her stress out from this crap.


----------



## CAMellie

Some things are just getting to me today so I'm having a generally sad day.


----------



## penguin

Another of those weeks where it's everything that's making me want to cry.


----------



## CaAggieGirl

This would have been our weekend together. I woke up and did not have to pack. Got off work knowing behind the door there wouldn't be his handsome self waiting for me with a big smile and an even bigger hug. :really sad:


----------



## Fattitude1

Nobody misses me for my mind. Or my body.


----------



## CaAggieGirl

Fattitude1 said:


> Nobody misses me for my mind. Or my body.



I'm sure someone misses you. Probably the person you would least expect.


----------



## spiritangel

A complete lack of chocolate


----------



## balletguy

I ran out of rum


----------



## BigBeautifulMe




----------



## CaAggieGirl

balletguy said:


> I ran out of rum





BigBeautifulMe said:


>



Where is the captain when you need him?


----------



## Oona

Just when I thought I had it under control, I had a major panic/anxiety attack in the middle of Best Buy today.


----------



## Weirdo890

Oona said:


> Just when I thought I had it under control, I had a major panic/anxiety attack in the middle of Best Buy today.



I'm sorry to hear that. I hate it when that happens. *Hugs*


----------



## Oona

Weirdo890 said:


> I'm sorry to hear that. I hate it when that happens. *Hugs*



It was awful. That's why I don't go to the store alone. But I thought I'd be fine. 

I picked up the last copy of a movie and this lady started screaming at me. I started backing up and backed into a group of people which just caused me to go into total panic mode.


----------



## Weirdo890

Oona said:


> It was awful. That's why I don't go to the store alone. But I thought I'd be fine.
> 
> I picked up the last copy of a movie and this lady started screaming at me. I started backing up and backed into a group of people which just caused me to go into total panic mode.



Well that sucks. Well, it's over now. No need to worry.


----------



## CaAggieGirl

Oona said:


> Just when I thought I had it under control, I had a major panic/anxiety attack in the middle of Best Buy today.



Ugh! I hate best buy (and our local grocery store). I feel like I am always in the way and everyone bumps into me.

I'm sorry you had a bad experience today, it is over now, try to think of positive things , like how awesome you are!


----------



## Surlysomething

So sorry, sweetie. Hang in there, ok?

*hug*



Oona said:


> Just when I thought I had it under control, I had a major panic/anxiety attack in the middle of Best Buy today.


----------



## balletguy

Oona said:


> Just when I thought I had it under control, I had a major panic/anxiety attack in the middle of Best Buy today.



oh no i'm so sorry.


----------



## Gingembre

I don't think I miss him anymore...which is good. But I miss the idea of him, and I feel sad that I don't miss him. It's adding to the lonely feeling that I have today. I feel like an island. Totally alone. I know it's not really true, but I still feel it today.


----------



## Iannathedriveress

Seeing my old car getting towed and seeing it for the last time. So many memories were made with that car


----------



## HottiMegan

Kids have a real way of making you feel about 2 inches tall and totally wrong. I spent the last two weeks off and on hand painting minecraft characters for birthday party invitations for Max's 10th birthday. I was so close to finishing them and he got all sad to the point of tears that i forgot about a poem we found online weeks ago. So now, i feel like a ball of crap and that i cant seem to do anything right by him. Every time i do something, take the time to do stuff special for him, he always manages to think it's not good enough. I don't know why i even try anymore.


----------



## Lovelyone

In the past week three people whom I am associated with have passed on. It surely puts to light how short our time on Earth is. 
My niece's father passed away this morning of an aggressive cancer today...not one day after having been moved back to his home from the hospital for hospice care. Although I wasn't very fond of this man, I feel sad for my niece and nephew. It's a sad day for them and I feel guilty for being happy that it's my birthday.


----------



## kaylaisamachine

I went in to get a finger prick today for diabetes testing. Turns out my doctor wanted me to get all these kinds of blood tests. Had to get my blood drawn. First time in 11 years. Not a big deal, but I was terrified. Every blood experience I've ever had has been a bad one because I have "deep veins". Luckily, today went well. She only had to poke me twice. However, all this worrying about illnesses and diseases has had me quite depressed the past few days. And now I have to wait another 2-5 business days for results. I just want to be out of the woods or know if I'm actually sick. Wish me luck. :c


----------



## Oona

I've been separated over a year now. The divorce has been in process just shy of a year. And now I have to travel to the city the divorce was filed in order to straighten it out and get it completed. -_-


----------



## snuggletiger

Oona said:


> It was awful. That's why I don't go to the store alone. But I thought I'd be fine.
> 
> I picked up the last copy of a movie and this lady started screaming at me. I started backing up and backed into a group of people which just caused me to go into total panic mode.



Would ice cream help ((((((((OONA)))))))))))


----------



## moore2me

HottiMegan said:


> Kids have a real way of making you feel about 2 inches tall and totally wrong. I spent the last two weeks off and on hand painting minecraft characters for birthday party invitations for Max's 10th birthday. I was so close to finishing them and he got all sad to the point of tears that i forgot about a poem we found online weeks ago. So now, i feel like a ball of crap and that i cant seem to do anything right by him. Every time i do something, take the time to do stuff special for him, he always manages to think it's not good enough. I don't know why i even try anymore.



Hi Megan,

I read your description of Max's behavior with your work on his birthday
invitations and thought "this sounds familiar". Doing a little research on how children's minds and their psycho-social development usually matures I found this from a text . . . .

http://psychology.about.com/od/psychosocialtheories/a/psychosocial.htm

*Psychosocial Stage 2 - Autonomy vs. Shame and Doubt*
 The second stage of Erikson's theory of psychosocial development takes place during early childhood and is focused on children developing a greater sense of personal control.
 Other important events include gaining more control over food choices, toy preferences, and clothing selection.
 Children who successfully complete this stage feel secure and confident, while those who do not are left with a sense of inadequacy and self-doubt.

So, Max wanting some control over his party (even the invitations) was a normal thing for young kids. And him successfully getting (safe & reasonable) controls over his life will help him be a normal boy & adult. 




Lovelyone said:


> In the past week three people whom I am associated with have passed on. It surely puts to light how short our time on Earth is.
> My niece's father passed away this morning of an aggressive cancer today...not one day after having been moved back to his home from the hospital for hospice care. Although I wasn't very fond of this man, I feel sad for my niece and nephew. It's a sad day for them and I feel guilty for being happy that it's my birthday.



Dear Terri,

I am sorry to hear about your niece and nephew's father dying from cancer. It is always difficult to have a parent die and to watch them taken by cancer is even harder. It is a fate I would wish on no one and will be glad to see the day come when we can cure the majority of cancers in humans. 

I apologize for missing your birthday too. Things are popping around my house like it was the fourth of July!!! My mom keeps me busy more than I would have ever predicted. She calls and asks me to do something for her and then calls an hour later and says she has changed her mind. She asks me to order things, get repair people to come to her house, balance her check book, and then either forgets asking me to do this or backs out. I don't mind helping her, but I do mind wild goose chases and sounding like a crazy woman on the phone with strangers. 

Now she is going to need emergency surgery next week and I dread it - she has developed a large abdominal hernia that will have to be repaired surgically. I think she will do okay during the surgery - I am just dreading the rehab and recovery.

But enough about me . . . .* Happy Belated Birthday Young Lady.*


----------



## Lovelyone

Thank you Moore2me.

I am sad cos my niece and nephew are having such a rough time with the passing of their father. Worse yet is that the father's gf of 4 years sneakily changed the obituary and put herself and her four kids (not HIS kids) in front of his biological family on the obituary. It's a small thing but that kind of thing matters to family.


----------



## moore2me

Lovelyone said:


> Thank you Moore2me.
> 
> I am sad cos my niece and nephew are having such a rough time with the passing of their father. Worse yet is that the father's gf of 4 years sneakily changed the obituary and put herself and her four kids (not HIS kids) in front of his biological family on the obituary. It's a small thing but that kind of thing matters to family.



Terri,

Sounds like your neice & nephew better get themselves to a lawyer quick before Evil Bitch & the hoards of darkness ravage anything that maybe left in the kingdom. If the kids cannot afford a retainer, there are Legal Aid Assistance Organizations in most states and most large towns. If you tell me a city, I can look them up for you.

And if it would make the kids feel better, they can pay to have a second obituary run in certain papers in their area (making sure the correction is prominantly made - even leaving out the girl friend & her spawn?). It wouldn't cost much, it might make them feel better. It would also be a warning shot across the bow of the enemy ship.


----------



## CAMellie

Abnormal mammogram results. Going in tomorrow for further testing.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

You have really been through it lately. This after your sister's diagnosis - so unfair. You're in my thoughts, Mellie.


----------



## Lovelyone

moore2me said:


> Terri,
> 
> ***snipped
> And if it would make the kids feel better, they can pay to have a second obituary run in certain papers in their area (making sure the correction is prominantly made - even leaving out the girl friend & her spawn?). It wouldn't cost much, it might make them feel better. It would also be a warning shot across the bow of the enemy ship.



Thank you Moore2me. Their father didn't have much to fight about. He was jobless and lived with others his whole life. He wasn't much of a worker, nor a collector. Fortunately my sister saved a few things of his to pass on to his kids, and my niece took lots of pictures. 
My sister and I have decided to have the funeral home make them the laminated memory/obituary cards with photo and the Lord's prayer on the reverse. They aren't too expensive and we are going to buy several of them so that my niece and nephew can give some ot their father's sisters, also. We can use an obituary that WE write and make sure that the kids have one that suits them.


----------



## Diana_Prince245

CAMellie said:


> Abnormal mammogram results. Going in tomorrow for further testing.



Sending wishes your way. Mine was abnormal too. It is a scary experience.


----------



## CaAggieGirl

Woke up thinking about him this morning. It has been almost two weeks since I have thought about him.  why today? Why do I have to think about him anymore?


----------



## 1love_emily

I'm really happy that my room mate and best friend (Tass and Linnea) have wonderful boyfriends. But now that I don't have a wonderful boyfriend, I find myself feeling really jealous of them and really sad that no one will ever love me romantically like he used to.


----------



## spiritangel

Theres a list


first I found where they moved pokes on fb, I honestly did not know I had forgotten you could poke people anyway there 2months old was a poke from Scott Butler it made me sad that I never got to return it to him.


The rest are far less important

the complete lack of romantic prospects in my life

That this is the 3rd year in a row that I cant afford easter eggs and wont get any I miss the small cadbury ones that are hollow and about the size of a chickens egg sooo much and also the caramel filled ones oh heck I just love easter egg chocolate


and finally that the final Harry Potter Musical came out today and whilst i know I will watch it loads and loads and loads it is just so sad to see it end.


----------



## spiritangel

Starting to think I did something really wrong in a past life atm seriously

I diddnt get the DT I applied for makes me sad because I really worked hard on my entry and was hoping against hope I had a shot, so wish people would look and go wow shes on a budget look at what she managed to accomplish instead of how much product can a person cram onto something


----------



## Piink

I'm really sad when I think about what is coming up Thursday. Thursday, I will be putting my dream horse to sleep. She fell and got hurt pretty badly. We've tried all we could to make her comfortable, but it wasn't possible. The vet will be out on Thursday to put her to sleep.

My boyfriend will be getting me a bracelet made from her tail hair for my birthday. She was my dream horse and I love her so very much. Atleast I will have something to remember her by, besides memories in my head and photographs. ='[


----------



## Blackjack

Everything's miserable for me right now and I have no fucking clue how I'll have enough money to pay any of the bills this month. My depression is at its worst in a long time and it really feels like any happy memory I can think of to try and hang on to is poisoned and toxic.
I've got nothing to look forward to and I really have no idea what to do. Hopeless doesn't even feel like a sufficient word to use.


----------



## BigBrwnSugar1

Blackjack said:


> Everything's miserable for me right now and I have no fucking clue how I'll have enough money to pay any of the bills this month. My depression is at its worst in a long time and it really feels like any happy memory I can think of to try and hang on to is poisoned and toxic.
> I've got nothing to look forward to and I really have no idea what to do. Hopeless doesn't even feel like a sufficient word to use.



Please know that you are not alone in these financial hardships - I am going through the very same thing. My business is down and I get paid on commission so am struggling to figure out how I am going to meet all my bills, put gas in my car and maybe have something to eat.
Unfortunately misery loves company. Try to hang in there - it's all we can do plus hope for the best. Just know that you are not alone and I bet there are many more people in our same boat.


----------



## TwilightStarr

My heart is hurting for my nephew 

His dad moved away 2 years ago and he's only seen him once since then.

Now my sister has been to busy selling drugs all day with her boyfriend, so that me and my mom have been raising him for the past 8 months.

And today my sister went and signed over temporary custody to my mom and said "he's better off with you"

SERIOUSLY?! I would die for this kid, he changed my life the minute he came into this world!!


----------



## Surlysomething

He's beautiful.

You are a *GOOD* Aunt. I feel the same way about my nephew, but thankfully my sister is a great Mom. His biological father has not wanted anything to do with him however. We say fine, he's *ours* anyway.

Just love him, girl. He needs it. 




TwilightStarr said:


> My heart is hurting for my nephew
> 
> His dad moved away 2 years ago and he's only seen him once since then.
> 
> Now my sister has been to busy selling drugs all day with her boyfriend, so that me and my mom have been raising him for the past 8 months.
> 
> And today my sister went and signed over temporary custody to my mom and said "he's better off with you"
> 
> SERIOUSLY?! I would die for this kid, he changed my life the minute he came into this world!!


----------



## penguin

I'm feeling a bit better about it now, but the other night I was horribly upset after finally packing up all the clothes that no longer fit me. I'd forgotten how pretty some of the were, and how much better they are than the clothes I have now. I can't afford to buy new clothes at this point, or even fabric to make some, so it had me feeling sad and disgusted with myself.


----------



## spiritangel

penguin said:


> I'm feeling a bit better about it now, but the other night I was horribly upset after finally packing up all the clothes that no longer fit me. I'd forgotten how pretty some of the were, and how much better they are than the clothes I have now. I can't afford to buy new clothes at this point, or even fabric to make some, so it had me feeling sad and disgusted with myself.



When I can afford to post it I can send you some fabric (I am having financial issues atm and I get the clothes thing I have almost no leggings left atm which is scary)  I have stuff for leggings but some of it is for colder weather so not sure you will be able to use it (but its yours if you want it its enough to make clothes for me with extra so should give you enough to work with). If you have a china town type area look in their stores as often they have really cheap fabric and spotlight often has stuff on sale for $4/m you can also layby fabric at spotlight if that helps. 

You can also sell off your old clothes in the closet, peeps pay the postage as well and make some money to invest in new pretty stuff for you 




Also there are some groups on fb for 2nd hand clothes that are often pretty well priced just let me know if you want an invite


----------



## penguin

spiritangel said:


> When I can afford to post it I can send you some fabric (I am having financial issues atm and I get the clothes thing I have almost no leggings left atm which is scary)  I have stuff for leggings but some of it is for colder weather so not sure you will be able to use it (but its yours if you want it its enough to make clothes for me with extra so should give you enough to work with). If you have a china town type area look in their stores as often they have really cheap fabric and spotlight often has stuff on sale for $4/m you can also layby fabric at spotlight if that helps.



Oh, that's sweet of you  I didn't know Spotlight did layby, so I'll definitely check that out. I just need to get through this electricity bill and figure out what I'll be getting Amie for her birthday (because that's all too soon).



> You can also sell off your old clothes in the closet, peeps pay the postage as well and make some money to invest in new pretty stuff for you
> 
> Also there are some groups on fb for 2nd hand clothes that are often pretty well priced just let me know if you want an invite



I probably should, though I'd like to be able to fit into them again. I found a lot of things easier when I was at that weight, and I could buy stuff at stores. I'll think about selling them.


----------



## spiritangel

penguin said:


> Oh, that's sweet of you  I didn't know Spotlight did layby, so I'll definitely check that out. I just need to get through this electricity bill and figure out what I'll be getting Amie for her birthday (because that's all too soon).
> 
> 
> 
> I probably should, though I'd like to be able to fit into them again. I found a lot of things easier when I was at that weight, and I could buy stuff at stores. I'll think about selling them.





Thats fair enough, I hear you re electricity, I have an arrangement with my company for a set amount each fortnight as long as I meet it I am ok even if the bill is over that and I pay extra when I can 


Well not sure the flecy lined or the panne velvet is any help given where you live but your welcome to the black leggings fabric  also check out vinnies and stuff as sometimes they have fabric cheap it may not be enough to make you stuff (though sometimes enough for a top or so) but would be good for Amie and you can put stuff together.

I know about the birthday thing its Shaylyns soon and she wants cash something I have pointed out I rarely have any spare of better get putting stuff on the craft closet and my etsy store and hoping for a miracle or 3

I can understand that its just an option and you can always sell off the stuff your not as fond of anymore and keep your fav pieces


----------



## Piink

My sweet mare is gone. The vet came out today and agreed that her leg just could not be helped. I made the right decision but it still breaks my heart. She was my heart horse and I will forever miss her.


----------



## CastingPearls

My dad had a stroke two Saturday's ago. I was there when it happened and he was in the ER in less than an hour. They moved him to a larger hospital overnight and over two hours away during the two hours I was sleeping after they sent me home. 

This occurred a few days before I had to go to my former home and remove my belongings by court order in less than 8 hours because my ex was awarded sole custody of the house. I'm so thankful my best friend was there for moral support. 

My family members have outright refused to help with my dad and my grandmother who lives with us. I understand to a point. They're verbally abusive and have alienated everyone in the family but I won't abandon them. I've been shuttling back and forth between finding elder care for my gran (all the intake is done, it's just a matter of setting up Meals on Wheels, etc.) and now that my dad's been moving to a nursing/rehab facility, seeing him every other day. I have to report back to other distant relatives, other needs of my dad and gran and have no time for myself. None.

Some of my friends don't understand. They reach out and want to talk and don't realize I'm literally collapsing the moment I sit down. I don't know where the energy I *do* have is coming from. Some have been offended. Some have thrown tantrums. They can't comprehend that I'm literally not eating, not sleeping, heartsick and don't want to or can't talk about their daily lives. I'm barely functioning. No, we can't have a chat. I'm sorry. 

I've reached a point where I really don't want to hear platitudes and 'you're strong' and 'keep your chin up'. I'm losing it. I'm at my limit.
I was so desperate I stopped a church van in a parking lot to ask them to pray for my dad and gran.
I've spoken with their own pastor (I have faith and belief but I don't believe in organized religion, so I don't attend their church), a mainstream spiritual friend and the church van people who said they'd pray with me again, and from all of them I got that I should be grateful for what I'm going through. This is part of why I can't in good faith be part of these groups. They preach and talk AT but don't offer to lend a hand, in my experience, and I had been a member of a fundamentalist church since I was 15. Nothing has changed.

My father's house has been in decline since my mother's death in '02. After exhausting myself chauffering my brother and his son to the hospital ONCE to see my dad, taking them out to dinner, having them stay over, taking care of my grandmother, giving her insulin twice a day, standing over her to make sure she eats, I wake up to hear them talking about me not taking care of the house, tearing me down, saying horrible things when I'm the one taking care of everything. It broke my heart. 

I clean this house every day for hours since his stroke since he isn't here to abuse me while I'm doing it and not even making a dent, it's so bad. I've called every service I can think of and they can't help, or nothing is in their budget or is prohibitively expensive. 

My grandmother's refrigerator was empty and I went out in a blizzard and bought groceries to fill it up. She said nothing. The pastor's wife bought two bottles of generic tonic water and Gran thinks she walks on water now and is her guardian angel. Guess who asked them to bring the water? 

I've decided that once my father has returned home (whether fully recovered or partially with an aide) and is settled in, I intend to cut off all ties with my family, moving away, and changing my name with no forwarding address.

Recently another member here, a good friend, died. He was a caregiver for his mother and when she passed, he was discarded by his family and others who aren't worth mentioning, like trash. We cried on each others' shoulders so many times. He sacrificed so much in his life to take care of her and no one took care of him. 

It's very convenient for these people to assign a family member they know won't abandon, and tell themselves that they have lives and the caregiver doesn't. But that's not happening with me. My father and grandmother have lived their lives. They're elderly and made their choices. My family members who won't pitch in are living their lives. Yet they think they can dictate to me how to live mine and even expect me to defer to them or as my brother put it, 'suffer the consequences'.

I'm posting this to vent. Please don't offer any advice (I am joining caregiver groups). Please don't offer links, statistics, etc. I don't want pity. I don't want applause. 

I want peace. I want happiness. I want a chance at a life and I can't see it in servitude to people who've abused me my entire life until they expire. They've outlived everyone else. Sometimes I feel that people in my family died to escape them. But not me. I intend to live a long life. Free.

And I just got stood up by the second of two guys in less than a month. I wish I was dead.


----------



## firefly

CastingPearls said:


> I want peace. I want happiness. I want a chance at a life [...] I intend to live a long life. Free.



I wish I had a magic wand - I'd make this come true... you are such an adorable sweetheart, you deserve happiness!


----------



## moore2me

CastingPearls said:


> My dad had a stroke two Saturday's ago. I was there when it happened and he was in the ER in less than an hour. They moved him to a larger hospital overnight and over two hours away during the two hours I was sleeping after they sent me home.
> 
> (SNIPPED)
> 
> I clean this house every day for hours since his stroke since he isn't here to abuse me while I'm doing it and not even making a dent, it's so bad. I've called every service I can think of and they can't help, or nothing is in their budget or is prohibitively expensive.
> 
> My grandmother's refrigerator was empty and I went out in a blizzard and bought groceries to fill it up. She said nothing. The pastor's wife bought two bottles of generic tonic water and Gran thinks she walks on water now and is her guardian angel. Guess who asked them to bring the water?
> 
> I've decided that once my father has returned home (whether fully recovered or partially with an aide) and is settled in, I intend to cut off all ties with my family, moving away, and changing my name with no forwarding address.
> 
> (SNIPPED)
> 
> *I'm posting this to vent. Please don't offer any advice (I am joining caregiver groups). Please don't offer links, statistics, etc. I don't want pity. I don't want applause. *
> 
> I want peace. I want happiness. I want a chance at a life and I can't see it in servitude to people who've abused me my entire life until they expire. They've outlived everyone else. Sometimes I feel that people in my family died to escape them. But not me. I intend to live a long life. Free.
> 
> And I just got stood up by the second of two guys in less than a month. I wish I was dead.



Lainey,

I know you said you didn't want any advice or links, but you know with my mule headed stubborness, I hardly ever follow the assigned path - going my own way even if it is off a cliff. . . . 

My mom (87) had major surgery yesterday, survived and is recovering in the hospital. I have spent all week setting up care for her in home and in the hospital since I cannot be there due to my own illnesses. A person turned me onto to a small grant offerred by the Alzheimers Assn. This is $500 to $1000 given to help fund the care seniors who need help in the home. The patient does not have to have Alzheimers but a memory or brain problem, etc. For example, my mom has been confused and overwhelmed by this surgery and her life quality has declined. Her ability to keep her house clean and care for herself has declined as well. Her is where they describe the program. (If you need more help, I'll give you the lady's phone number who worked with me on applying for the grant. It involved an application that mom's doctors signed off on.)
http://www.payingforseniorcare.com/longtermcare/resources/alzheimers_respite_care.html

Giving valuable things to foolish men is casting pearls before pigs - they trample the pearls under their feet in the mud. You are not the one who should pay, the pig should - I recommend pork chops, baked loin, smoked ham hocks, bacon, cracklins, sausage, hot dogs, and BBQ ribs.

And if you run off - you better leave an address where your friends can get in touch with you (remember some of us have given up Facebook for Lent).


----------



## Surlysomething

Lots of love and thoughts your way, E.

Always.

T.




CastingPearls said:


> I want peace. I want happiness. I want a chance at a life and I can't see it in servitude to people who've abused me my entire life until they expire. They've outlived everyone else. Sometimes I feel that people in my family died to escape them. But not me. I intend to live a long life. Free.
> 
> And I just got stood up by the second of two guys in less than a month. I wish I was dead.


----------



## Weirdo890

My obsessive compulsive disorder is driving me crazy. I have been obsessing lately about obesity statistics, and it will not let me go or let me forget. I'm trying to just focus on my own body and health, but I obsess about everyone else too.

Part of me just wants to help the world be healthier, and the other part is concerned about becoming one of those fatophobic assholes that I've despised.

I know I have to let go of problems that I can't fix by myself, but my mind won't let me. I don't know how long I can go on like this.


----------



## Surlysomething

Look into mindful thinking and meditation. It can really help.






Weirdo890 said:


> My obsessive compulsive disorder is driving me crazy. I have been obsessing lately about obesity statistics, and it will not let me go or let me forget. I'm trying to just focus on my own body and health, but I obsess about everyone else too.
> 
> Part of me just wants to help the world be healthier, and the other part is concerned about becoming one of those fatophobic assholes that I've despised.
> 
> I know I have to let go of problems that I can't fix by myself, but my mind won't let me. I don't know how long I can go on like this.


----------



## Oona

imgur hate me right now... It keeps freezing.

Now how am I supposed to get paid to giggle all day?! 

;_;


----------



## penguin

spiritangel said:


> Thats fair enough, I hear you re electricity, I have an arrangement with my company for a set amount each fortnight as long as I meet it I am ok even if the bill is over that and I pay extra when I can



I was still recovering from when my ex screwed me over with child support last year and from Christmas. This year has GOT to be better!



> Well not sure the flecy lined or the panne velvet is any help given where you live but your welcome to the black leggings fabric  also check out vinnies and stuff as sometimes they have fabric cheap it may not be enough to make you stuff (though sometimes enough for a top or so) but would be good for Amie and you can put stuff together.
> 
> I know about the birthday thing its Shaylyns soon and she wants cash something I have pointed out I rarely have any spare of better get putting stuff on the craft closet and my etsy store and hoping for a miracle or 3
> 
> I can understand that its just an option and you can always sell off the stuff your not as fond of anymore and keep your fav pieces



I do check out what the local op shops have, but they only have pieces that are big enough to make stuff for Amie. I might strike gold there one day 



CastingPearls said:


> I've decided that once my father has returned home (whether fully recovered or partially with an aide) and is settled in, I intend to cut off all ties with my family, moving away, and changing my name with no forwarding address.



*hugs* Australia is nice. You can ditch the snow and enjoy some sun


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

I agree! Lainey, move to Sydney. We can hang out when I get there in a year.


----------



## CaAggieGirl

I hate when you want someone, you think they want you, and then they don't. :doh: C'est la Vie


----------



## CastingPearls

My late sister's gay husband just died after losing a long and agonizing battle with complications from AIDS. RIP Christopher. You were and are deeply loved and I know Lisa was at the gates of Heaven waiting for you with a bottle of Cristal.


----------



## daddyoh70

Lost a 52 year old sister in law to a heart attack and a 48 year old first cousin to liver cancer in the span of 3 days. Both died unexpectedly and way to young. I was asked to play the bagpipes at both funerals. Below is a pic of me at my cousin's funeral.


----------



## dharmabean

I am sorry for your loss, daddyoh. I am thankful to get to see a picture of you with your pipes though. 



daddyoh70 said:


> Lost a 52 year old sister in law to a heart attack and a 48 year old first cousin to liver cancer in the span of 3 days. Both died unexpectedly and way to young. I was asked to play the bagpipes at both funerals. Below is a pic of me at my cousin's funeral.


----------



## daddyoh70

dharmabean said:


> I am sorry for your loss, daddyoh. I am thankful to get to see a picture of you with your pipes though.



Thank you dharmabean, that really means a lot to me.


----------



## TwilightStarr

daddyoh70 said:


> Lost a 52 year old sister in law to a heart attack and a 48 year old first cousin to liver cancer in the span of 3 days. Both died unexpectedly and way to young. I was asked to play the bagpipes at both funerals. Below is a pic of me at my cousin's funeral.





CastingPearls said:


> My late sister's gay husband just died after losing a long and agonizing battle with complications from AIDS. RIP Christopher. You were and are deeply loved and I know Lisa was at the gates of Heaven waiting for you with a bottle of Cristal.




So sorry for both of your losses, prayers for you and your families.


----------



## Surlysomething

I'm so sorry for your losses. *hug*



daddyoh70 said:


> Lost a 52 year old sister in law to a heart attack and a 48 year old first cousin to liver cancer in the span of 3 days. Both died unexpectedly and way to young. I was asked to play the bagpipes at both funerals. Below is a pic of me at my cousin's funeral.
> 
> [/IMG]


----------



## Surlysomething

Very sorry to hear this, E. *big hug*



CastingPearls said:


> My late sister's gay husband just died after losing a long and agonizing battle with complications from AIDS. RIP Christopher. You were and are deeply loved and I know Lisa was at the gates of Heaven waiting for you with a bottle of Cristal.


----------



## dharmabean

I am sorry for your loss, dear friend. 



CastingPearls said:


> My late sister's gay husband just died after losing a long and agonizing battle with complications from AIDS. RIP Christopher. You were and are deeply loved and I know Lisa was at the gates of Heaven waiting for you with a bottle of Cristal.


----------



## penguin

*big squishy hugs to everyone*


----------



## Diana_Prince245

My papaw failed to wean off the ventilator yesterday. I think my grandma is going to have to make a really difficult choice soon.


----------



## balletguy

Diana_Prince245 said:


> My papaw failed to wean off the ventilator yesterday. I think my grandma is going to have to make a really difficult choice soon.



Oh God I am so sorry hun.


----------



## Piink

This news story ... Kids killing kids. Not sure if it is sad or sicking or both. Ugh!


----------



## daddyoh70

CastingPearls said:


> My late sister's gay husband just died after losing a long and agonizing battle with complications from AIDS. RIP Christopher. You were and are deeply loved and I know Lisa was at the gates of Heaven waiting for you with a bottle of Cristal.



Lainey, so sorry to hear about this.

Thanks to everyone for the sympathy and condolences. You are all truly a great group of people.
Daddyoh


----------



## moore2me

CastingPearls said:


> My late sister's gay husband just died after losing a long and agonizing battle with complications from AIDS. RIP Christopher. You were and are deeply loved and I know Lisa was at the gates of Heaven waiting for you with a bottle of Cristal.



Lainey, My goodness young lady - your basket of bad events, family grief, loss and unwanted changes has been overflowing lately. I am sorry to hear it is continuing. I know you miss your sister very much, and I understand you hate to see her late husband die as well. There is some comfort in thinking that she now has him to talk to in heaven or the next life or world of our forefathers.



daddyoh70 said:


> Lost a 52 year old sister in law to a heart attack and a 48 year old first cousin to liver cancer in the span of 3 days. Both died unexpectedly and way to young. I was asked to play the bagpipes at both funerals. Below is a pic of me at my cousin's funeral.



Daddyoh, Rough week. I hope you can have the next months free of family health disasters and loved ones' funerals. You are so sweet to volunteer to play the bagpipes in their funerals - I am usually a mess (mentally and physically) in such situations and would be worthless - one of the weeping and wailing women. I admire someone who can march, make music and look majestic under duress. I hear that the Scots are famous for their presence under pressure (like William Wallace)



Diana_Prince245 said:


> My papaw failed to wean off the ventilator yesterday. I think my grandma is going to have to make a really difficult choice soon.



Diana - I feel for you and your Grandma. My mom had major surgery earlier in the week and we discussed the "Living Will" thing and DNR (Do Not Resusitate) code for mom. As I type these words, she is still in the hospital hooked up to machines with an IV and port in her jugular vein, getting morphine shots for her pain, being spoon fed like a baby when food comes, and talks very faintly and quietly. When we talk around her bed in normal voices it frightens her. I am not completely confident that this thing will end well. I looked at medical statistics for her type of surgery and it stated that within 30 days about 28% of patients had perished (causes pneumonia or blood clots).



Piink said:


> My sweet mare is gone. The vet came out today and agreed that her leg just could not be helped. I made the right decision but it still breaks my heart. She was my heart horse and I will forever miss her.



Piink - I am truely sorry about your mare. It sounds like you had a great little pony there and she liked you too. Do you know where she came from? Is there a possibility of getting one of her brothers/sisters (even if it is a colt)? You could train and raise a little colt. You can also adopt a mustang or two from the National Forest Service too. There usually bring them into major towns every year.

I had to put down one of my horses like you did. It was a hard thing to do - but when the horse is sick and cannot get well or is in pain and cannot have relief, it is the right thing to do. I too had a beautiful horse that had a nice rocking trot (like a Saddlebred horse). She got into some alfalfa hay that had mold on the inside (from being bundled when it was wet) and developed a bad case of colic and stopped eating & started bleeding. The vet agreed after several trips and treatments that there was no other choice.

And you remember the Kentucky Derby winner Barbaro, who broke a cannon bone. I think they spent almost a million dollars and almost a year trying to save that horse and he still had to be put down. Bad leg injuries in a horse are notoriously hard to heal and often result in death to the equine. You and your mare faced insurmountable odds.


----------



## Piink

moore2me said:


> Piink - I am truely sorry about your mare. It sounds like you had a great little pony there and she liked you too. Do you know where she came from? Is there a possibility of getting one of her brothers/sisters (even if it is a colt)? You could train and raise a little colt. You can also adopt a mustang or two from the National Forest Service too. There usually bring them into major towns every year.
> 
> I had to put down one of my horses like you did. It was a hard thing to do - but when the horse is sick and cannot get well or is in pain and cannot have relief, it is the right thing to do. I too had a beautiful horse that had a nice rocking trot (like a Saddlebred horse). She got into some alfalfa hay that had mold on the inside (from being bundled when it was wet) and developed a bad case of colic and stopped eating & started bleeding. The vet agreed after several trips and treatments that there was no other choice.
> 
> And you remember the Kentucky Derby winner Barbaro, who broke a cannon bone. I think they spent almost a million dollars and almost a year trying to save that horse and he still had to be put down. Bad leg injuries in a horse are notoriously hard to heal and often result in death to the equine. You and your mare faced insurmountable odds.



I knew the cards were stacked against us from the get go, but I gave it all I had. Dammit, I tried. I know I made the right decision for her, even if it broke my heart. We had a bond that everyone for a mile could see. I'm sorry to hear that you had to deal with something similar. It's a heartbreak I wish on no-one. 

I have no idea where she came from. She was a no-name pony from a no-name line from a no-name town. She had no paperwork following her, no word of mouth to follow or anything. And I am surprised by it. While a no-name horse is a dime a dozen, there was something special about her. Horses like her had to have some history behind her. But, I'll never know it. I've got a zip-lock baggie full of her tail hair that will become a bracelet here soon. That way I will forever have a piece of her with me.

A good friend of mine, who helped me try to save her, runs a horse rescue and I think I'm just gonna go love on the rescue horses for a while. I need time to heal from this. The little Shetland mare who just came in is healing from some nasty leg wounds and may be pregnant. I still have a stash of cookies that I'm giving to her. She needs as much love as she can get right now and she may be able to help me feel better.


----------



## moore2me

Piink said:


> A good friend of mine, who helped me try to save her, runs a horse rescue and I think I'm just gonna go love on the rescue horses for a while. I need time to heal from this. The little Shetland mare who just came in is healing from some nasty leg wounds and may be pregnant. I still have a stash of cookies that I'm giving to her. She needs as much love as she can get right now and she may be able to help me feel better.



Piink, I applaud anyone who takes the time and/or money to work with animal who have been abused or in need of rescue. I do not know if you have worked with Shetland ponies before, but I have and thought I'd pass on some tips for you. Keep in mind Shetlands are horses down deep in their heart of hearts. They are not dogs and definitely not cats. We should not expect them to behave as a dog would - for example being content to be lay by our side and bask in the glory of our company. Horses want and need to be outdoors and graze on grasses. Most dogs do not mind being alone for a few hours, horses absolutely hate (and are fearful) when left alone. Horses are herd animals and their evolution has ingrained in their minds that there is safety in numbers. A horses left alone will often run away and look for other horses.

Being so little Shetlands are often given to little kids as pets and to ride. This often works out badly because the little ponies need training and handling like big horses. Kids just usally spoil them, race the ponies, and can be mean to them. When the pony bites a kid, the pony gets a severe penalty. Most horse people will recommed kids get a very stable, older regular sized horse than a Shetland - much safer.

So the best gift you can give this little Shetland pony is to train her to behave like a good horse. Make sure she is halter broke and leads well with no problems. Make sure she will hop into a trailer and get out with no problem and no big diva production. Make sure you can touch and doctor all parts of her body without her trying to bit or kick you. I you want to rein break her or saddle break her, you will have to do it from the ground or find a experienced child rider to help you. Make sure she is free from common diseases like mange, bots, hoof cracks, stomach worms, vitamin deficiencies, and her teeth are sound and filed. Have the stable test her for common communicable diseases in horses like equine encephalitus. 

By making the little orphan horse a healty and well behaved citizen who does not hurt human children, you will help assure she has a much brighter future. Once good job would be a therapy horse at a handicapped kids' not for profit riding stable.


----------



## Mishty

I haven't been in a relationship in over a year,and I haven't been in any real contact with my ex since May,she went from being my best friend of a decade,my partner,my world,to nothing. After I went the fuck off on her about her drug problem via facefuck,she blocked me. It's been the most peaceful 11 months of my life,since I met her ten years ago. Well,yesterday she unblocked me and started randomly liking photos of us and of her daughter and me. I should block her,just block her and get it over with...but the Scorpio I am can't,and even though I'm well aware this will end with my heart mangled...and bruised...again,I can't look away. I need more will power where my own mental health is concerned.


----------



## spiritangel

I am so sorry for all the loss and heartbreak that seems to be in the air atm.

Lots and lots of squishy hugs and deepest Sympathy to all who need it.









Mishty said:


> I haven't been in a relationship in over a year,and I haven't been in any real contact with my ex since May,she went from being my best friend of a decade,my partner,my world,to nothing. After I went the fuck off on her about her drug problem via facefuck,she blocked me. It's been the most peaceful 11 months of my life,since I met her ten years ago. Well,yesterday she unblocked me and started randomly liking photos of us and of her daughter and me. I should block her,just block her and get it over with...but the Scorpio I am can't,and even though I'm well aware this will end with my heart mangled...and bruised...again,I can't look away. I need more will power where my own mental health is concerned.




Hugs I know that feeling Its been about a year and a half since I last had a relationship (the only two people I have even remotely connected to in that time have pulled the dissappearing Man act)

then a couple of weeks ago my ex unblocked me and sent a friend request and messaged me on FB it lasted a whole week till he lied, and pulled his old I wanna self destruct and write msyself off crap and I called him on it and told him off. I told him the truth I dont have enough energy for me atm let alone to pour into someone hell bent on self destruction. He wanted someone 'nice' in his life, I translate that to mean doormat or who will put up and shut up which I am no longer willing to do especially not since him. So after me saying that he blocked me it lasted a whole week and to be honest I wasnt even remotely surprised he blocked me or even upset just a bit miffed as he fed me the whole song and dance about needing to make amends and prove he was a good person.

However do what feels right for you, maybe this is what you need before you can completely move on, sometimes we need to slide backwards before we go forwards and sometimes we need to wake up in our own time

whatever it is for you we will be here for you when you need us.

Lots of squishy hugs


----------



## Blackjack

Briefly surfaced, but I'm drowning again.

I've got all sorts of anxiety and emotional issues right now largely due to money problems. I'm really happy that I have a therapist appointment tonight. Unfortunately, my appointment is going to pretty much wipe out the rest of the money I have for the next two weeks, which ratchets my anxiety up even more, making seeing and talking to my therapist that much more important...

And I don't know who to ask for help. The ones who would aren't able to, and I don't know how to ask the ones who can when I already owe so much to so many people.


----------



## nugget34

Ask the therapist for a loan


----------



## kaylaisamachine

I must be a horrible fucking person or something because nobody seems to want me around these days.

Those days where you wished you existed as someone else, or simply did not _exist_.


----------



## Surlysomething

People are probably just wrapped up in their own shit. Don't be too hard on yourself.

Have a ME day. Go see a movie..treat yourself to lunch..a pedicure or just nap the day away. 

*hug*




kaylaisamachine said:


> I must be a horrible fucking person or something because nobody seems to want me around these days.
> 
> Those days where you wished you existed as someone else, or simply did not _exist_.


----------



## kaylaisamachine

Surlysomething said:


> People are probably just wrapped up in their own shit. Don't be too hard on yourself.
> 
> Have a ME day. Go see a movie..treat yourself to lunch..a pedicure or just nap the day away.
> 
> *hug*



I'm broke and that's what I've been doing every day on my spring break so far. Napping the day away. :/ I just don't even want to be awake at this point. My thoughts are too much.


----------



## Surlysomething

Girl, i've been there soooo many times.

Library? Free movie rentals? Wish I could take you out for a treat, but I live in a different country. Try and feel better, ok?

*bigger hugs*




kaylaisamachine said:


> I'm broke and that's what I've been doing every day on my spring break so far. Napping the day away. :/ I just don't even want to be awake at this point. My thoughts are too much.


----------



## firefly

A good friend is in hospital - today she showed me some photos of her leg - all red, swollen and hurting a lot so I told her to see a doctor asap. Now she has to stay there at least a week because she has an erysipel. I live too far away to take care of her pets and bring the stuff she needs to the hospital. I hope her familiy can help her. *sigh*


----------



## Oona

Everything.


----------



## Piink

So much for Good Friday! I woke up sick as a dog. I'm all stuffed up and a sore throat.


----------



## Surlysomething

*big hug* 

and another *big hug* 





Oona said:


> Everything.


----------



## Oona

Surlysomething said:


> *big hug*
> 
> and another *big hug*




Thanks hun


----------



## ODFFA

My dad just told me 5 - yes, 5 - racist jokes in a row. I just stood there. Didn't know what to say to such immaturity and ignorance. I just can't help the few tears that are sliding down my cheeks right now and feeling pretty darn ashamed of my race and my family, even though I know neither of those are bad as a whole. Just.... WTF!?


----------



## Surlysomething

Ouch. I would not handle that very well.





ODFFA said:


> My dad just told me 5 - yes, 5 - racist jokes in a row. I just stood there. Didn't know what to say to such immaturity and ignorance. I just can't help the few tears that are sliding down my cheeks right now and feeling pretty darn ashamed of my race and my family, even though I know neither of those are bad as a whole. Just.... WTF!?


----------



## Lovelyone

ODFFA said:


> My dad just told me 5 - yes, 5 - racist jokes in a row. I just stood there. Didn't know what to say to such immaturity and ignorance. I just can't help the few tears that are sliding down my cheeks right now and feeling pretty darn ashamed of my race and my family, even though I know neither of those are bad as a whole. Just.... WTF!?



You can be ashamed of your family for how they act and the things that they say. Lord knows my family has let me feel this way many times, too, and from my own experiences--sometimes saying something to them about their inappropriate behavior is useless because they simply do not care whom they offend. Leopards can't change their spots simply because someone tells them to. It's pretty obvious (by how you reacted to what they had to say) that you know right from wrong so don't let what they have to say define who you are as a person. It's okay to go your own way on topics like these.


----------



## dharmabean

My fiance is in the hospital. He's having irregular/regular heart beats, palpitations, sweating and anxiety. He's been there since 10am. They're keeping him for observation and they are going to do an ultrasound of his heart. His heart rate is atrial fibrillation/tachycardia. Ranging from low 51 to high 158 and every fucking number in between. 

If you pray, please do. I know I don't "know" any of you, but please.. good thoughts.


----------



## Piink

dharmabean said:


> My fiance is in the hospital. He's having irregular/regular heart beats, palpitations, sweating and anxiety. He's been there since 10am. They're keeping him for observation and they are going to do an ultrasound of his heart. His heart rate is atrial fibrillation/tachycardia. Ranging from low 51 to high 158 and every fucking number in between.
> 
> If you pray, please do. I know I don't "know" any of you, but please.. good thoughts.



My Momma has been in and out of the hospital for the past two years with this same problem. Hang in there. It will stress you out like crazy. Good thoughts and prayers heading your way!!


----------



## ODFFA

You are both truly in my thoughts with much love and positivity, DB. I can't even imagine how you must be feeling right now. *hugs*


----------



## penguin

I think I'm developing some social anxiety.


----------



## spiritangel

dharmabean said:


> My fiance is in the hospital. He's having irregular/regular heart beats, palpitations, sweating and anxiety. He's been there since 10am. They're keeping him for observation and they are going to do an ultrasound of his heart. His heart rate is atrial fibrillation/tachycardia. Ranging from low 51 to high 158 and every fucking number in between.
> 
> If you pray, please do. I know I don't "know" any of you, but please.. good thoughts.



Lots of squishy hugs, and positive thoughts and energy. Please don't forget to also take care of yourself at this time. Hang in there and fingers and everything crossed they find the cause and can help him.



penguin said:


> I think I'm developing some social anxiety.



I think its actually easy to have happen given how society treats each other in general but add to that the fat hatred, I struggle somedays with even wanting to leave my house but then again its hard when people hurl abuse at you out of the blue. 

Lots of hugs, and if you can see a councilor, it may help.


----------



## Gingembre

That thing where they tell you they want to be friends, but it becomes increasingly obvious that they dont.


----------



## snuggletiger

Gingembre said:


> That thing where they tell you they want to be friends, but it becomes increasingly obvious that they dont.



thats like what i go through, the exes that reappear to see "how have you been, ive always cared and been thinking about you" then they get mad when I ask "Why? you left"


----------



## spiritangel

I ran out of easter eggs



Hugs Ginger, I always say if you want to stay friends then it has to be a real friendship not just a once a year how are you? hence to say I am not friends with any of my exes.....


----------



## Gingembre

What a day. I feel shocked...sick...sad. I can't talk about it on a public forum, but someone give me a hug, please?


----------



## Dmitra

{{{{Gingembre}}}}

I'm so sorry for whatever happened.


----------



## spiritangel

Gingembre said:


> What a day. I feel shocked...sick...sad. I can't talk about it on a public forum, but someone give me a hug, please?



Hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug

Ginger if you need someone to talk to pm me am here if you need a friend.


----------



## AuntHen

Gingembre said:


> What a day. I feel shocked...sick...sad. I can't talk about it on a public forum, but someone give me a hug, please?




Big big hugs Laura!!


----------



## TwilightStarr

Dmitra said:


> {{{{Gingembre}}}}
> 
> I'm so sorry for whatever happened.




*((HUGS))*


----------



## Surlysomething

Thinking of you, L.

*hug*



Gingembre said:


> What a day. I feel shocked...sick...sad. I can't talk about it on a public forum, but someone give me a hug, please?


----------



## Gingembre

Dmitra said:


> {{{{Gingembre}}}}
> 
> I'm so sorry for whatever happened.





spiritangel said:


> Hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug
> 
> Ginger if you need someone to talk to pm me am here if you need a friend.





fat9276 said:


> Big big hugs Laura!!





TwilightStarr said:


> *((HUGS))*





Surlysomething said:


> Thinking of you, L.
> 
> *hug*



Thank you so much, girls. You have no idea how much this means to me.


----------



## spiritangel

Jane Henson Died


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Gingembre said:


> Thank you so much, girls. You have no idea how much this means to me.



Belated hugs, honey.  Hope everything will be okay.


----------



## Piink

My niece was diagnosed with Celiac Disease. Thankfully her wonderful husband is 100% behind her and is more than willing to make changes to help her. 

Also, I'm feeling really bad for my cousin. She is pretty much in the same boat as I am with two sick older parents. She makes so many sacrifices for them, and I know exactly how she feels. She is such a great young lady, but so overwhelmed with little to no help.


----------



## Oona

Piink said:


> My niece was diagnosed with Celiac Disease. Thankfully her wonderful husband is 100% behind her and is more than willing to make changes to help her.
> 
> Also, I'm feeling really bad for my cousin. She is pretty much in the same boat as I am with two sick older parents. She makes so many sacrifices for them, and I know exactly how she feels. She is such a great young lady, but so overwhelmed with little to no help.



My 10 year old sister was diagnosed at age 2. There are a lot of resources out there. Look online and you'll see. Show her the communities, help her get involved. If you need any help, let me know. <3


----------



## Piink

Oona said:


> My 10 year old sister was diagnosed at age 2. There are a lot of resources out there. Look online and you'll see. Show her the communities, help her get involved. If you need any help, let me know. <3



Thanks. 

I've been sending my sister a lot of info recently. We're all supporting her the best we can. I live so far away (she is in NC and me in FL) so it's all I can do right now.


----------



## Oona

Piink said:


> Thanks.
> 
> I've been sending my sister a lot of info recently. We're all supporting her the best we can. I live so far away (she is in NC and me in FL) so it's all I can do right now.



Sometimes its not about being there physically to show support, but emotionally. You're doing all you can and that's awesome.


----------



## Piink

Today is my brother's birthday. The sad part? He isn't here to celebrate it with us. He has been gone 2.5 years this month. 




ETA: (I had to quit typing cause I was crying)

It seems since he passed away the family has went to shambles. In less than 3 years, we lost 6 family members, nearly lost my Mom twice, my relationship tanked, my horse died, and so did my dog. 

And there is no one here at home who understands the stress. I'm the one who is left to pick up the pieces. And when there is a million pieces lying about, you eventually can't pick them all up.


----------



## Oona

"I like you immensely, as a friend, and even more than that. I just can't be with you."


Ouch. That stings.


----------



## f0nzw0rth

ODFFA said:


> My dad just told me 5 - yes, 5 - racist jokes in a row. I just stood there. Didn't know what to say to such immaturity and ignorance. I just can't help the few tears that are sliding down my cheeks right now and feeling pretty darn ashamed of my race and my family, even though I know neither of those are bad as a whole. Just.... WTF!?



Probably not the reaction he was going for


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Piink said:


> Today is my brother's birthday. The sad part? He isn't here to celebrate it with us. He has been gone 2.5 years this month.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> ETA: (I had to quit typing cause I was crying)
> 
> It seems since he passed away the family has went to shambles. In less than 3 years, we lost 6 family members, nearly lost my Mom twice, my relationship tanked, my horse died, and so did my dog.
> 
> And there is no one here at home who understands the stress. I'm the one who is left to pick up the pieces. And when there is a million pieces lying about, you eventually can't pick them all up.



I am so sorry. So much loss in your life, and all at once. I know we don't know each other, but... *hugs.* I hope things get less difficult and less sad for you soon.


----------



## TwilightStarr

Piink said:


> Today is my brother's birthday. The sad part? He isn't here to celebrate it with us. He has been gone 2.5 years this month.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> ETA: (I had to quit typing cause I was crying)
> 
> It seems since he passed away the family has went to shambles. In less than 3 years, we lost 6 family members, nearly lost my Mom twice, my relationship tanked, my horse died, and so did my dog.
> 
> And there is no one here at home who understands the stress. I'm the one who is left to pick up the pieces. And when there is a million pieces lying about, you eventually can't pick them all up.




I am so sorry for your losses and the hard times you are going through. Hope things get better for you soon.

*hugs*


----------



## Piink

TwilightStarr said:


> I am so sorry for your losses and the hard times you are going through. Hope things get better for you soon.
> 
> *hugs*



Thanks. 

I hope they get better soon too. But I'm thinking that it ain't going to happen. Ugh. I'm on a good run of bad luck lately. Seems like every good thing is met with 10 more bad things. I'll get over it ... someday.


----------



## Piink

BigBeautifulMe said:


> I am so sorry. So much loss in your life, and all at once. I know we don't know each other, but... *hugs.* I hope things get less difficult and less sad for you soon.



For some reason, I missed this the first time around. Thank you. 

Sadly, things just got sadder.

My aunt passed away this morning. She was not in good health at all and she is in a better place. I just feel so so bad for my cousin. Like me, she was born to older parents. She is only a couple of years younger than I, and I can only imagine how she feels. Her father (my uncle) is suffering from cancer as well. At least he is recovering. 

I will know, but don't know yet, how she feels. I am never looking forward to the day my mother passes. Her health isn't much better than my aunt's health was. 

Ugh. I am just so damn sick of this shit. I mean really. Give me a f*ckin break!!!!!!


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

I am so sorry for your loss, Piink.


----------



## Webmaster

That our US Senate is so clueless about gun votes.


----------



## ButlerGirl09

Watched the documentary "Bully" tonight and cried throughout most of the film. It just breaks my heart to see how some children treat other children.

On a positive note, I am grateful for the impact through therapy that I've been able to have on the lives of children who have dealt with bullying.


----------



## Lovelyone

Watching the movie Glory. It always makes me cry.


----------



## veggieforever

*Just gotten rid of one cold sore a fortnight ago and suddenly I can feel tingling again...  *


----------



## SSBBW Katerina

Looking at the hideous decor in some of these houses on the show FOUR HOUSES on the TLC network. That is making me sad--- and a bit creeped out.  Didn't know Norman Bates had a sister. Just sayin'.


----------



## dharmabean

I'll tell you what's making me sad right now... and it may be beating a dead horse but it still effects me....


I went through some pretty serious depression the last couple of weeks and wanted to come here and about it. But because some jerk on the forum has singled me out in the past, the last few times I posted I was depressed, I'm too scared to come on and post about it out of being judged and ripped a new asshole.

This.... saddens me. Others can post their frustrations, fears and depressions... 

But I can't out of fear of being lit up.

Others can come on here and seek support, and support each other... 

But I am afraid I can't because of judgement.

That's pretty eff'd up. THis was my only .. "spot" .. I could openly talk about how deeply depressed I've been.


----------



## HottiMegan

dharmabean said:


> I'll tell you what's making me sad right now... and it may be beating a dead horse but it still effects me....
> 
> 
> I went through some pretty serious depression the last couple of weeks and wanted to come here and about it. But because some jerk on the forum has singled me out in the past, the last few times I posted I was depressed, I'm too scared to come on and post about it out of being judged and ripped a new asshole.
> 
> This.... saddens me. Others can post their frustrations, fears and depressions...
> 
> But I can't out of fear of being lit up.
> 
> Others can come on here and seek support, and support each other...
> 
> But I am afraid I can't because of judgement.
> 
> That's pretty eff'd up. THis was my only .. "spot" .. I could openly talk about how deeply depressed I've been.



I'm sorry you're depressed. If you ever want a person to vent to, i'm here. (or facebook) I too have been getting down and i know how much it sucks.


----------



## littlefairywren

dharmabean said:


> I'll tell you what's making me sad right now... and it may be beating a dead horse but it still effects me....
> 
> 
> I went through some pretty serious depression the last couple of weeks and wanted to come here and about it. But because some jerk on the forum has singled me out in the past, the last few times I posted I was depressed, I'm too scared to come on and post about it out of being judged and ripped a new asshole.
> 
> This.... saddens me. Others can post their frustrations, fears and depressions...
> 
> But I can't out of fear of being lit up.
> 
> Others can come on here and seek support, and support each other...
> 
> But I am afraid I can't because of judgement.
> 
> That's pretty eff'd up. THis was my only .. "spot" .. I could openly talk about how deeply depressed I've been.



There's always someone who thinks they own a forum, has suffered more, is better than most and who's opinion holds more clout. No one has the right to make you feel small, nor your thoughts or feelings invalid. 

You've every right to share here, without fear and the worry of being hounded by someone being bitchy and small minded. 

You have my support dharmabean


----------



## spiritangel

HottiMegan said:


> I'm sorry you're depressed. If you ever want a person to vent to, i'm here. (or facebook) I too have been getting down and i know how much it sucks.





littlefairywren said:


> There's always someone who thinks they own a forum, has suffered more, is better than most and who's opinion holds more clout. No one has the right to make you feel small, nor your thoughts or feelings invalid.
> 
> You've every right to share here, without fear and the worry of being hounded by someone being bitchy and small minded.
> 
> You have my support dharmabean



I second all of the above and am always available if you need a friend, or anything

lots of squishy hugs. Sometimes you just have to put the people who do that on ignore in order to feel safe to express yourself. (You do know you can set people on this forum to ignore right  means you dont see any of their posts).

Lots of hugs beautiful lady, remember you are worthwhile and amazing.


----------



## moore2me

dharmabean said:


> I'll tell you what's making me sad right now... and it may be beating a dead horse but it still effects me....
> 
> 
> I went through some pretty serious depression the last couple of weeks and wanted to come here and about it. But because some jerk on the forum has singled me out in the past, the last few times I posted I was depressed, I'm too scared to come on and post about it out of being judged and ripped a new asshole.
> 
> This.... saddens me. Others can post their frustrations, fears and depressions...
> 
> But I can't out of fear of being lit up.
> 
> Others can come on here and seek support, and support each other...
> 
> But I am afraid I can't because of judgement.
> 
> That's pretty eff'd up. THis was my only .. "spot" .. I could openly talk about how deeply depressed I've been.



Dear dharmabean*, I am offering to you my service as a special body guard to help run interference against ANYONE who is harassing you and putting you in fear of posting here*. Consider me your temporary Rottweiler. Name the perp(s) (publicly or in a PM to me) and its on. You will not need to deal with this person - I need a snack.

*If you do not want my assistance, just let me know. I will bow out *- but know that the offer stands at any time. I am also pretty sure that there are other white knights that would be glad to smite your internet tormentors just as readily as myself. (Some of us just hate folks that intimidate young uns' or newcomers.)


----------



## WVMountainrear

Loneliness...as usual.


----------



## Pandasaur

lovelylady78 said:


> Loneliness...as usual.




You and me both, part of me was thinking about dressing up and going out by myself but just doesn't feel fun at all. I'm holding on until I get to see my friend in May.


----------



## Mathias

lovelylady78 said:


> Loneliness...as usual.



Same here as well...


----------



## Your Plump Princess

Plans to see my boyfriend this summer have just been cancelled due to unexpected bullshit. He's blaming himself, I'm trying to cheer him up while holding it together inside til he goes to work.

I didn't really expect him to make it out here anyway... .. .


----------



## Linda

Step parent heart break


----------



## 1love_emily

My doctors refused to refill a vital prescription, making my hormones go wacko jacko and screwing me all up. Lots of extreme highs and lows. And right now is low.

Friends are mad at me. I'm mad at me. I just want to crawl into a dark hole and stay there forever. 

I failed my first class. Correction: I failed a final that made it so I failed the class. I get a chance to redo the final, but I still can't believe I failed piano skills, when I've taken 10 years of piano lessons. I only failed because I didn't practice enough, which is my own damn fault.


----------



## moore2me

1love_emily said:


> My doctors refused to refill a vital prescription, making my hormones go wacko jacko and screwing me all up. Lots of extreme highs and lows. And right now is low.
> 
> Friends are mad at me. I'm mad at me. I just want to crawl into a dark hole and stay there forever.
> 
> I failed my first class. Correction: I failed a final that made it so I failed the class. I get a chance to redo the final, but I still can't believe I failed piano skills, when I've taken 10 years of piano lessons. I only failed because I didn't practice enough, which is my own damn fault.



Dear 1love_emily, 

If you don't mind - I have a few thoughts about your post . . . . when my doctor(s) will not refill a prescription for me, it is usually because one of the following:
1. I have failed to follow a requirement for a refill (like a pap test or mammogram), if I schedule one and beg forgiveness, (via the doc's nurse), the hormones are then dispensed, or
2. For some other reason, I have misunderstood the reason for denial of the drugs. Like the original doctor quit & a new guy/girl is the sheriif, or I haven't been in for a required office visit, or someone in the chain of the request dropped the ball (a secretary did not give the doctor the request).

I would investigate what happened and try and fix it, or . . . . 
After taking hormones for years, I finally decided enough was enough. I quit taking them and went through one more menopause cycle. I did not have as much trouble as I thought I would. I discussed the stoppage with my doc and she had no problem with this.

And finally, I looked at your self-described school schedule from your previous posts and was surprised at the number of music instruments that you have to practice on during your studies. It wasn't just piano, you named about five or six instruments that you had to play & practice daily. Your schedule sounds pretty rough, even at times close to impossibly difficult. You may have set yourself up for more than you can physically handle for a college education. A person can only do so much work and then you have to sleep, study, go to class, make your doctor visits & other committments. If everyone in your life is mad that you are not handling your business or previous goals, it may be time to rethink your schedule and cut back on what you are trying to do. You may have to cut back your college class time as well - less credit hours per semester.


----------



## Mathias

On Saturday, I visited my uncle who was moved to a hospice within the last few weeks. While I knew his health was in decline, I didn't know he had been moved to a hospice until recently. It was just so hard seeing him look so frail. We were all talking to him and we each got to say how much we loved him, but what killed me was when he managed to lift his good arm up and point to his ear. It's like he was saying je could still hear us and knew we were there with him, but he just couldn't talk. The doctors say he could pass away any day now.


----------



## Piink

It's been over a month since my sweet pony was laid to rest. I miss her. I still wake up some days and think about going to see her and then I remember. The main reason I help out at my local horse rescue is in her memory. But, it still breaks my heart when I see others out enjoying their ponies.


----------



## HottiMegan

Pain. When it doesn't go away, the pain just sucks the fun out of the day. I have been really down the last few days. Even my sanctuary of bed is ruined due to pain..


----------



## CAMellie

My aunt Vicki is having triple bypass surgery in the morning. They don't expect her to make it because of other health issues. She is the last of my momma's siblings...and my heart is breaking.


----------



## willowmoon

Finding out that one of the guitarists of the band Slayer passed away yesterday .... Jeff Hanneman R.I.P.


----------



## Surlysomething

49. WAY too young.

Very sad.



willowmoon said:


> Finding out that one of the guitarists of the band Slayer passed away yesterday .... Jeff Hanneman R.I.P.


----------



## Pandasaur

Yesterday the respite nurse found my uncle in his house laying on the floor unconscious, no one had heard from him since Sunday. Hes in the hospital and mom says that he is stabilizing but they are unsure what happened. It wasn't a stroke but it may have been a seizure. I really hope hes okay. I hate hospitals, they always seem like a death sentence for my family. I hope I don't get that early morning phone call....


----------



## HottiMegan

We spent our entire tax refund on tests at the vet and are no closer to getting answers. They sent him home with a shot in the butt and some meds to take home. He's sleeping in the shaft of the evening sun right now. I am praying he'll get better. That little guy is my baby.


----------



## Mathias

We had my uncle's funeral yesterday. He'd been battling sickness for a long time so while I'm sad he passed away, he's no longer in any pain.


----------



## CAMellie

After a setback because of an infection, my Aunt Vicki is going in for her bypass surgery tomorrow morning. This especially hard for the family because tomorrow is the 2 year anniversary of the day my momma died. So very worried for my aunt.


----------



## 1love_emily

I've been feeling really unconfident lately. 
I hate the way I look, I hate the way I sound, I hate my personality, I hate that I can't get a date, I hate that I can't diet, I hate that I can't exercise, I hate that I can't control what I eat, I hate that I don't practice my trombone, I hate that I can't ride my horse as much as I want, I hate that I'm always the fattest person in the room... I hate myself. 

I just want to be skinny and pretty and worth something.

I'm also feeling horrifically sad because one of the horses at my barn is really sick, so sick that the might have to be put down. And instead of being with my barn family, I'm home with my family-family (my sizist, ableist family) worrying about JB and my barn family.


----------



## Twilley

the usual crippling loneliness


----------



## Oona

Its been 4 years, today, since my Ema passed away. 

She was my Best Friend, my rock, the one I could always count on. If she was still alive, my daughter would be living with me, not her dad, I wouldn't have had to move to another state just to afford the cost of living.

She was always there when I needed her. She helped me get clean 9 years ago, and stay clean. She's the reason I am who I am today. 

I woke up this morning and just started crying. No one will ever replace her, no one will ever fill the void she left behind.


----------



## CAMellie

2 years ago today the world lost a wonderful human being. She was warm, caring, compassionate, stubborn, funny, generous to a fault, and did her very best. I miss you, momma!


----------



## Surlysomething

Lots of love your way.

<3



Oona said:


> Its been 4 years, today, since my Ema passed away.
> 
> She was my Best Friend, my rock, the one I could always count on. If she was still alive, my daughter would be living with me, not her dad, I wouldn't have had to move to another state just to afford the cost of living.
> 
> She was always there when I needed her. She helped me get clean 9 years ago, and stay clean. She's the reason I am who I am today.
> 
> I woke up this morning and just started crying. No one will ever replace her, no one will ever fill the void she left behind.


----------



## danielson123

ok so my mom who I still live with just got laid off. Sucks so so much. 6 weeks of severance. I'm flabbergasted. Not sure what will happen.

But my thoughts are instead with a special friend of mine. Everything always turns out for the best. Always.

Ok, I'mma go be drunk now.


----------



## 1love_emily

The little red horse on the left died this morning 

JB was such a sweet old boy. 

View attachment 420615_10200563373383266_663243524_n.jpg


----------



## spiritangel

My Nana the only grandparent I ever really have had. Is in hospital after two bad falls and they are not sure she will make it and even if she does she is being moved into a high needs nursing home, she has no quality of life, so I know it would be best for her if she did pass on. But it does not make it any easier as she helped raise me and out of all her grandkids we spent the most time together. She never once made me feel like I wasnt a real member of the family because I was adopted (others did even if they did not realise it). I just hope she goes peacefully and finds her heaven on the other side.


----------



## 1love_emily

http://www.upworthy.com/this-kid-just-died-what-he-left-behind-is-wondtacular-rip
If you want to cry, go ahead and watch this. It's what making me sad.

If I were to die right now, I'd die knowing that I'm not loved romantically. I'm loved by so many friends and my family. But I want someone to look at me like I am the only girl in the world. And what kills me is that for a brief moment I had that, and I lost that. 
I'm trying to hard to love myself and to go on dates and meet new people, but I haven't met a single FA in my region. And specifically, an FA in my age range and in my city. Seriously, everyone seems to be over 40 (and there's nothing wrong with that, but I can't date a man who is twice my age).


----------



## Oona

I found out via social media that my step mom started radiation therapy today. No one told me she was sick.


----------



## largenlovely

My dad was exposed to chemicals on the job and at 34 yrs old they told him he only had 10 more years to live cuz he has bullous emphysema. The docs said they had never seen such a severe case in someone his age. He's now 61 and beat their odds by a long shot but lately he has been very very sick  

He's really stubborn and has delayed going to the doctor but he's promised he's going this week. I'm scared to death of what we're gonna find out. My dad is a very small man and his legs have been swelling and have turned purple in spots and a line of purple runs all the way up the inside of his leg. He's been having a hard time walking and said his hips are killing him. When his mom got cancer, it went into her bones and settled in her hips so I'm kinda having flashbacks. I'm just scared to death  

I don't want to alarm his family so I don't feel like I can talk about it on my facebook or anything but I'm terrified of the news we might have to face soon. Me and my sister and her kids are all closest to him more than we are my mom. So I'm trying to prepare myself but everytime I think about it, I start panicking. I don't know how we would deal with losing him


----------



## Duchess of York

I'm sad, disappointed and angry that the reason I wasn't chosen for a call center position because my psoriasis "looked like poison ivy " and I explained the reason that I left my last job was because of being harrassed by my boss due to my weight. The 2 interviewers stepped outside the room and the female said to the male "she interviewed really well but if she went to HR, she's probably a trouble maker." When they came back into the meeting room, I told them about themselves, picked up my purse and left. May be a blessing but still angers me.


----------



## Iannathedriveress

So sad that Ford is going to stop making the Falcon in 2016. It was Forbidden Fruit that I know will never come to America, what a shame.
http://www.autoblog.com/2013/05/23/...aking-operations-after-90-years/#aol-comments


----------



## RabbitScorpion

ClutchingIA19 said:


> So sad that Ford is going to stop making the Falcon in 2016. It was Forbidden Fruit that I know will never come to America, what a shame.
> 
> \



Never come to america? You missed out. Ford made and sold a whole buch of them up here in the 1960's, killing off Studebaker's last successful car, the Lark, and clobbering its other Detroit competition (Chevrolet's Corvair and Plymouth's Valiant) in sales.

Nonetheless, I'm sorry to hear about the closing of Broadmeadows. I really wanted a Capri convertible they briefly exported to here in the late 80s, before the Aussie Dollar went through the roof.


----------



## RabbitScorpion

I am the youngest of three brothers.

The oldest passed away suddenly a year and a half ago.

I found out this week that my other brother is very seriously ill. A lot of things have been going through my head. Thoughts of both the times I have enjoyed with my brother, but also memories of the times we disagreed. I've also been thinking about my own time - just how much of it has been wasted _waiting_. Waiting for the car in front of me to start moving. Waiting for a program to open on the slow computer at work after I have clicked the icon. Waiting for someone to return a call, etc.

Also worried about my mom, still alive, who had always felt blessed because she had never lost a child - before the oldest died.


----------



## AuntHen

RabbitScorpion said:


> I am the youngest of three brothers.
> 
> The oldest passed away suddenly a year and a half ago.
> 
> I found out this week that my other brother is very seriously ill. A lot of things have been going through my head. Thoughts of both the times I have enjoyed with my brother, but also memories of the times we disagreed. I've also been thinking about my own time - just how much of it has been wasted _waiting_. Waiting for the car in front of me to start moving. Waiting for a program to open on the slow computer at work after I have clicked the icon. Waiting for someone to return a call, etc.
> 
> Also worried about my mom, still alive, who had always felt blessed because she had never lost a child - before the oldest died.




I am one of four sisters and I lost one of my younger sisters when she was only 20. I feel and understand your words. I pray you may not lose this one and that you may have more good times and memories together. God bless you and your family!


----------



## Iannathedriveress

RabbitScorpion said:


> Never come to america? You missed out. Ford made and sold a whole buch of them up here in the 1960's, killing off Studebaker's last successful car, the Lark, and clobbering its other Detroit competition (Chevrolet's Corvair and Plymouth's Valiant) in sales.
> 
> Nonetheless, I'm sorry to hear about the closing of Broadmeadows. I really wanted a Capri convertible they briefly exported to here in the late 80s, before the Aussie Dollar went through the roof.



Yeah I know Ford sold the Falcon here during the 60's. I was hoping that the new Falcon would replace the Crown Victoria and compete with the Charger, but no they have the Taurus instead, what a pity.


----------



## Morganer

Its RAINING! And my cat cant find his play straw.


----------



## Morganer

ClutchingIA19 said:


> So sad that Ford is going to stop making the Falcon in 2016. It was Forbidden Fruit that I know will never come to America, what a shame.
> http://www.autoblog.com/2013/05/23/...aking-operations-after-90-years/#aol-comments



Have you noticed that everything from Australia as Holden craps out here in America? (Latest: Pontiac, GTO, G8, etc.)


----------



## Iannathedriveress

Morganer said:


> Have you noticed that everything from Australia as Holden craps out here in America? (Latest: Pontiac, GTO, G8, etc.)



Yes I know, they were so sweet yet so few people bought them. At least GM was smart enough to export to other markets.


----------



## moore2me

RabbitScorpion said:


> I am the youngest of three brothers.
> 
> The oldest passed away suddenly a year and a half ago.
> 
> I found out this week that my other brother is very seriously ill. A lot of things have been going through my head. Thoughts of both the times I have enjoyed with my brother, but also memories of the times we disagreed. I've also been thinking about my own time - just how much of it has been wasted _waiting_. Waiting for the car in front of me to start moving. Waiting for a program to open on the slow computer at work after I have clicked the icon. Waiting for someone to return a call, etc.
> 
> Also worried about my mom, still alive, who had always felt blessed because she had never lost a child - before the oldest died.



Dear RabbitScorpion,

I am sorry to hear of the death of your oldest brother and the illness of your middle brother. The untimely deaths of family members and loved ones is one of the toughest things to take in this life. Plus, leaving you are the man of the family and looking at the potential for you taking care of your aging mother is another bitter pill to swallow. You are right in your concern that a mother losing adult children to death is un-natural and very, very trying on moms - it is against the natural order of the universe.

And your retrospect of the time you (and the rest of us worker bees) have wasted in this life is chilling too. It is a wakeup call from our better self when we realize the time we have wasted frittering away and doing useless tasks. This should serve as a shout out to other DIMMERS to treasure and take care of the time we have left. Some goals that will always leave a warm feeling in your heart are - be kind to children. Give the some praise, or some love, or just some positive attention. Other worthwhile goals might be to show kindness to the elderly (who often get very little love or attention) or to treat animals humanely - give them some needed food, attention, or love. God - however you accept or believe in him or her - will bless you for being kind to earth's creatures.


----------



## RabbitScorpion

moore2me said:


> Dear RabbitScorpion,
> 
> I am sorry to hear of the death of your oldest brother and the illness of your middle brother. The untimely deaths of family members and loved ones is one of the toughest things to take in this life. Plus, leaving you are the man of the family and looking at the potential for you taking care of your aging mother is another bitter pill to swallow. You are right in your concern that a mother losing adult children to death is un-natural and very, very trying on moms - it is against the natural order of the universe.
> 
> And your retrospect of the time you (and the rest of us worker bees) have wasted in this life is chilling too. It is a wakeup call from our better self when we realize the time we have wasted frittering away and doing useless tasks. This should serve as a shout out to other DIMMERS to treasure and take care of the time we have left. Some goals that will always leave a warm feeling in your heart are - be kind to children. Give the some praise, or some love, or just some positive attention. Other worthwhile goals might be to show kindness to the elderly (who often get very little love or attention) or to treat animals humanely - give them some needed food, attention, or love. God - however you accept or believe in him or her - will bless you for being kind to earth's creatures.



Thank you very much for your very kind words.

You may wish to know that my mom (I) also has two wonderful daughters (sisters), the older of which lives literally next door to mom.


----------



## RabbitScorpion

Morganer said:


> Have you noticed that everything from Australia as Holden craps out here in America? (Latest: Pontiac, GTO, G8, etc.)



True, but through no fault of fine Aussie craftsmanship, engineering and creativity.

When GM launched the plan to import the Holden Monaro as the new Pontiac GTO, the Australian Dollar was worth considerably less than the US Dollar.

Before the new GTO could arrive here, the US Dollar took a big hit on currency markets, and the AU$ quickly became with more than the USD. As a result, the GTO hit the Pontiac showrooms priced near perhaps even above some Cadillac models. Needless to say, very few sold.


----------



## EMH1701

Kitt, my pet leopard gecko died yesterday. I'd had her since April 2004. That is the high end of the captive gecko lifespan. I miss her so much already. It's crazy but you get attached to pets like that, even if they aren't furry. They're cute in their own little way.


----------



## CaAggieGirl

Today was an up and down day. Ended on a down note, I didn't get the job


----------



## CAMellie

My stister left for Missouri this morning and I've been crying off and on all day. She's my best friend and it'll be years before we see each other again.


----------



## Dromond

My favorite cousin had a heart attack today. He's alive, conscious and coherent, but not doing well. If I had the money I'd fly back to Illinois to see him, but I don't.


----------



## Surlysomething

*bug hug*

I wish I could plant a money tree in your yard.




Dromond said:


> My favorite cousin had a heart attack today. He's alive, conscious and coherent, but not doing well. If I had the money I'd fly back to Illinois to see him, but I don't.


----------



## Iannathedriveress

My new soccer ball exploded after using for a day only. It was my own fault for overinflating it.:doh:


----------



## Dromond

Surlysomething said:


> *bug hug*
> 
> I wish I could plant a money tree in your yard.



Thank you. 

Fortunately he seems to be improving today. Hope that trend continues.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

My boyfriends mother caught him skyping with me while on the phone. He closed out skype, but didn't hang up the phone, and I heard her shrieking. "What'd she do to her hair? Who is she talking about being her soulmate, you? Why is she up this early?" after he hung up, she also apparently told him "You need help, I mean that, literally and seriously you need to see someone and seek help"

...Yaaay.. I'm more-so in tears because now we can't skype or text for a while otherwise it will be holy hell, and I know this just makes an already shitty situation [he's moving into his grandparents house and his parents are moving across the US to go live with his sister] into an INCREDIBLY shitty/stressful situation until they're gone.


----------



## HottiMegan

Sundays always make me a little sad. It's the end of my time with hubs. I get a little reprieve with the kids having a second parent around. Plus, he's my best friend and I miss him when he's at work.


----------



## Lovelyone

It makes me sad to see how horribly my sisters oldest adult children (ages 22, 24) treat her.


----------



## dharmabean

"Fiance'' in jail for getting physical with me. 
Found out from the neighbors he's been having a 22yr old over while I'm working.
I'm not feeling very.. worthy of anything anymore.


----------



## CastingPearls

I just took something to relieve back spasms and help me sleep and I'm not coherent enough to talk with a friend who needs to know how much she's loved and worthy.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

dharmabean said:


> "Fiance'' in jail for getting physical with me.
> Found out from the neighbors he's been having a 22yr old over while I'm working.
> I'm not feeling very.. worthy of anything anymore.



Oh dharma, I'm so, so sorry.  Please know that his abusive actions are no reflection of your worthiness... from what you've posted here, you seem like an absolutely wonderful girl. Please seek solace in friends and family if you can and be patient and gentle with yourself. *Big, big hugs.*


----------



## spiritangel

dharmabean said:


> "Fiance'' in jail for getting physical with me.
> Found out from the neighbors he's been having a 22yr old over while I'm working.
> I'm not feeling very.. worthy of anything anymore.



YOU ARE WORTHY!!! I tagged you in a post yesterday because It was about 

Dharma and being worthy of Love it reminded me of you and I had a feeling you need to hear it.

You are worthy, you are worth far more than you know and you Missy Are nothing less than AMAZING!

Mastin Kipp was talking at the Hay house summit about something he terms the Spiritual Storm

we get signs we need to change things or find another way, we then get knocked over the head by the uni-verse 

then if we still don't listen or can not find our way, we get the Spiritual Storm I know it doesnt feel like it now but sometimes these things happen to clear out the crap and to allow us into a much better place

you are so worthy, you are one of the most Strong, amazing women I know. I also know you will get through this and that you have a huge group of people here and elsewhere in your corner

Please remember this and he is so not worthy of you you did not deserve any of what he has done.


----------



## BearHug2013

dharmabean said:


> "Fiance'' in jail for getting physical with me.
> Found out from the neighbors he's been having a 22yr old over while I'm working.
> I'm not feeling very.. worthy of anything anymore.



:bow: Thy are worthy, praise thee :bow: 

This makes HIM unworthy of YOU!!!!!! If he can't keep it in his pants that's his problem and his loss, in case you didn't notice infidelity is my pet peeve...and I'm a dude!!! 
Stay strong and stay cool hope you find someone who recognizes your true worth. :happy:


----------



## Weirdo890

dharmabean said:


> "Fiance'' in jail for getting physical with me.
> Found out from the neighbors he's been having a 22yr old over while I'm working.
> I'm not feeling very.. worthy of anything anymore.



You are worthy and absolutely wonderful. We are all here for you. *big bear hugs*


----------



## AuntHen

dharmabean said:


> "Fiance'' in jail for getting physical with me.
> Found out from the neighbors he's been having a 22yr old over while I'm working.
> I'm not feeling very.. worthy of anything anymore.




He is not worthy of YOU dear girl! Lots of hugs dharma!


----------



## RabbitScorpion

Really sorry to hear that, Dharma.

Someone with your appearance and intelligence has a bright future!

Just play _Dream_ by the Pied Pipers a few times.


----------



## littlefairywren

dharmabean said:


> "Fiance'' in jail for getting physical with me.
> Found out from the neighbors he's been having a 22yr old over while I'm working.
> I'm not feeling very.. worthy of anything anymore.



I'm with everyone else, sweet girl, it's he that isn't worthy. Sending you extra gentle hugs.


----------



## dharmabean

Thank you all so much. I'm ... rediscovering me again. It's just a process of refocus and moving forward. I have a few options ahead of me. I'm trying to figure what would be best right now. Essentially, he told me and the cop last night that a restraining order won't stop him. I'm a bit freaked out. I'm a bit lonely. I'm a bit lost... no not a bit lost.. way... effin lost. 

Had an amazing bible study tonight and learned a pretty good story from the bible. This, I hold dear now. I will make it through, just as I do everything. 

Thank you guys again. :bow:



BigBeautifulMe said:


> Oh dharma, I'm so, so sorry.  Please know that his abusive actions are no reflection of your worthiness... from what you've posted here, you seem like an absolutely wonderful girl. Please seek solace in friends and family if you can and be patient and gentle with yourself. *Big, big hugs.*





spiritangel said:


> YOU ARE WORTHY!!! I tagged you in a post yesterday because It was about
> 
> Dharma and being worthy of Love it reminded me of you and I had a feeling you need to hear it.
> 
> You are worthy, you are worth far more than you know and you Missy Are nothing less than AMAZING!
> 
> Mastin Kipp was talking at the Hay house summit about something he terms the Spiritual Storm
> 
> we get signs we need to change things or find another way, we then get knocked over the head by the uni-verse
> 
> then if we still don't listen or can not find our way, we get the Spiritual Storm I know it doesnt feel like it now but sometimes these things happen to clear out the crap and to allow us into a much better place
> 
> you are so worthy, you are one of the most Strong, amazing women I know. I also know you will get through this and that you have a huge group of people here and elsewhere in your corner
> 
> Please remember this and he is so not worthy of you you did not deserve any of what he has done.





BearHug2013 said:


> :bow: Thy are worthy, praise thee :bow:
> 
> This makes HIM unworthy of YOU!!!!!! If he can't keep it in his pants that's his problem and his loss, in case you didn't notice infidelity is my pet peeve...and I'm a dude!!!
> Stay strong and stay cool hope you find someone who recognizes your true worth. :happy:





Weirdo890 said:


> You are worthy and absolutely wonderful. We are all here for you. *big bear hugs*





fat9276 said:


> He is not worthy of YOU dear girl! Lots of hugs dharma!





RabbitScorpion said:


> Really sorry to hear that, Dharma.
> 
> Someone with your appearance and intelligence has a bright future!
> 
> Just play _Dream_ by the Pied Pipers a few times.





littlefairywren said:


> I'm with everyone else, sweet girl, it's he that isn't worthy. Sending you extra gentle hugs.


----------



## moore2me

dharmabean said:


> Thank you all so much. I'm ... rediscovering me again. It's just a process of refocus and moving forward.* I have a few options ahead of me. I'm trying to figure what would be best right now. Essentially, he told me and the cop last night that a restraining order won't stop him. I'm a bit freaked out. I'm a bit lonely. I'm a bit lost... no not a bit lost.. way... effin lost*.
> 
> Had an amazing bible study tonight and learned a pretty good story from the bible. This, I hold dear now. I will make it through, just as I do everything.
> 
> Thank you guys again. :bow:



Dear Missy Dharma, 
I am sorry that your BF turned out to be a big toady frog. You are on the right track in reporting him to the law and separating him from your house. I am basically a non-violent person, but I have a few suggestions for the jerkwad who won't be stopped by a restraining order . . . .

a. Go to a police supply store and buy a couple of cans of pepper spray. Keep a smaller one in your purse, keep a couple stashed around your home. Keep a couple of bottles of plain water so if you have to spray him you might get a little in your eye and need to wash your eyes out. Don't worry about lover boy - he can fend for himself. 

b. A step up from pepper spray would be a stun gun. This is more effective but it is also a little more expensive. It won't kill him but will bring him down and he will wait for the police to come.

c. Take a self defense course to learn how to disable him with your body.

d. Get a dog - a breed that is medium to large in size.

e. Of course, the traditional weapons like guns, knives, crossbows are good too but it take some skill to use them in a high stress situation.

f. If you think he might to sneak up on you at night while you are at home you can put in cameras and/or motion sensing devices that turns on and takes high pictures if he sneaking around your house. 

g. Feel free to ask the nice police people to do extra surveillance around your house and tell them what you are up against. You could also ask the neighbors to watch your house. Give them a way to read some signal that you could leave out if you are in danger (like a certain light on or a set of curtains pulled up). Ask them to call the police if they see a signal.

It doesn't hurt to talk to the women of your Bible study group too. Also, if you need the M2M rotweilller, she is probably available.


----------



## BigBrwnSugar1

Dharma Dearest,

So sorry to read of your troubles but you are an amazing woman and you will be just fine. 

As far as that asshole...............Fuck that fucking fuck! 

Rock on, my girl, rock on!!!!


----------



## Dromond

dharmabean said:


> "Fiance'' in jail for getting physical with me.
> Found out from the neighbors he's been having a 22yr old over while I'm working.
> I'm not feeling very.. worthy of anything anymore.



He is the worthless one.


----------



## largenlovely

I became best friends with the girl who survived the wreck my brother died in years ago. We shared a deep bond through the tragedy. I loved her like a sister. She named her first child after me. Then...things took an ugly turn. She had a great deal of survivors guilt and such. We both smoked weed and drank but that was as far as my drug use went. She knew I never wanted to touch harder drugs cuz we had discussed it. She laced my drink with acid one night without telling me and I wound up ending our friendship over it when she admitted putting acid in my drink to me like it was no big deal.

Her drug use became worse and worse. It saddened me and still does because I had so much love for the old friend I used to know. I just found out she has been missing for a week. That's not really unusual but they said her brother has always went and pulled her out of the crack houses after a few days. They said they can't find her anywhere and it is rumored that someone was after her for some reason or another. They're assuming she's likely dead. 

I probably wouldn't be welcome at the funeral if that's the case because her family blames me for her drug use becoming worse, which is ridiculous because I didn't want any part of it. They believe I deserted her and it caused her to spiral out of control because I was the best friend she had ever had...and she was mine. But I just couldn't go down the path she was taking *sigh* it makes me sad...there's nothing I can do  I will always love her and will grieve over this but I will have to do it alone


----------



## SuperMishe

The amount of physical pain I'm in and the knowledge that I did this to myself.


----------



## spiritangel

Silly really 

two things I totally forgot to order any chocolate when i did the groceries

and the stainless steel skimmer I ordered to strain my cordial did not arrive I will get a refund for it but was looking forward to how easy it would make things.


----------



## SD007

ggaaaawwwwd these girl cramps D:


----------



## HottiMegan

It's getting to the point that i feel like a complete dolt and ineffectual parent. I sometimes think they'd be better off without me.


----------



## Lovelyone

The way that my sister turns the screws when she knows that there is NOTHING I can do about it. It frustrates me to the max. She knows that there is no other option for me but to accept how she does things...so she takes advantage of my misfortunes to make me feel terrible.


----------



## Mathias

It seems like the only time I have any interaction with friends of mine is via a text message here or there, or through a computer screen. Being at work helps a little because I've met some new people, but I've felt so isolated and lonely for a really long time now.


----------



## spiritangel

SD007 said:


> ggaaaawwwwd these girl cramps D:




I feel your pain on this one atm for me I get the worst lower back pain, ugh sometimes it really is not fun to be a woman.


----------



## HottiMegan

Just found out my sister in law has breast cancer. She's only 40. I'm scared and sad. I have an aunt who's breast cancer had spread to the brain. I lost another beloved in law to breast cancer last yeast. I gate cancer. I'm very sad and scared for my sil and my brother and nephews.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

I'm so sorry, Megan. I'll keep your family in my thoughts.


----------



## Yakatori

Mathias said:


> "_...the only time I have any interaction with friends of mine is via a text message here or there, or through a computer screen...felt so isolated and lonely for a really long time now._"


Pretty common, especially for the immediate-period of time as soon you're just out of school for a few months. Doubly-so for folks who're normally very social, that tend to take the fullest advantage of the opportunity living on a campus affords. 

Having a job is step 1. Without that everything else is so much more difficult. But establishing a new, locally-adapted social network also requires some time & work as well. Honestly, more work than what you're normally used-to (or should be). As does maintaining the old ties, which is, sort of, a critical piece. 

And, sometimes; actually lots of the time; it won't seem worth it. And, in fact, many of what were your closest friends will seem to not reciprocate your own efforts. After all, & to some extent, we all live in our own little worlds, with what seem to be distinctly our own challenges & crisises.

But that's really besides the point; since the best rewards seem to come when we're not as concerned with what most immediately (or not-so-immediately) results, but-instead acting as a natural expression of our own personal-values. Or at least I think so-anyway. 

Basically, this-now is your opportunity to more objectively evaluate who you consider to be your friend or not, independently of their physical-proximity or how easy it is to keep in touch. Make use of it. Think on it.

And-then, once you've decided, don't (totally) give-up on anyone you truly value on that level. And don't let them just give-up on you. Obviously, you shouldn't put all your eggs in one basket. Of course, make other plans, move-up & on. Keep widening that net. But don't stop extending invitations. And always be prepared to work, to some extent, to make some time for that face-time. Because, inevitably, it's when you least expect-it, that it all comes back. Just like it was yesterday.


----------



## HottiMegan

BigBeautifulMe said:


> I'm so sorry, Megan. I'll keep your family in my thoughts.



Thanks. I'm hoping that since is stage one, it won't end like my aunt and aunt in law.


----------



## Diana_Prince245

They had to induce my ex-roommate's fiancée at 20 weeks because she started to have seizures from eclampsia. I have a huge sad. They wanted to be parents so much


----------



## spiritangel

HottiMegan said:


> Just found out my sister in law has breast cancer. She's only 40. I'm scared and sad. I have an aunt who's breast cancer had spread to the brain. I lost another beloved in law to breast cancer last yeast. I gate cancer. I'm very sad and scared for my sil and my brother and nephews.




I am so so very sorry to hear this Megan, Treatment has come a long way I am very lucky to have two amazing friends who have both had and survived Breast Cancer. They had a lot of positive love and support around them. 

A really great Idea is to get everyone to send prayers/healing energy to her at a set time each day, it really does help.

I wish there were words to take away the pain, it is so hard watching someone you love suffer through what is a horrible thing for anyone to go through.

Just lots and lots of squishy hugs





Diana_Prince245 said:


> They had to induce my ex-roommate's fiancée at 20 weeks because she started to have seizures from eclampsia. I have a huge sad. They wanted to be parents so much




I am so sorry to hear this, it is always so heartbreaking when things like this happen with no rhyme or reason.


----------



## Lovelyone

Watching someone make dreadful mistakes that will harm their reputation and having nothing within my power to stop them from doing so.


----------



## CAMellie

My neighbor was on the porch smoking when my little dog decided to run out and say hi. She jumped up and hit his cigarette face-first. Luckily she's physically ok. My poor Pissy Missy.


----------



## HottiMegan

My husband had a stroke today. I'm so scared and sad. they say it was minor but still a stroke at 45.. not good.
I had to leave him in the hospital so the boys could go to bed. It was so hard. The house is so lonely without him. He's my everything. He's why i get up, he is why i smile. He's my rock. Worst day so far in my life...


----------



## Blackjack

HottiMegan said:


> My husband had a stroke today. I'm so scared and sad. they say it was minor but still a stroke at 45.. not good.
> I had to leave him in the hospital so the boys could go to bed. It was so hard. The house is so lonely without him. He's my everything. He's why i get up, he is why i smile. He's my rock. Worst day so far in my life...



Fuck... I'm so sorry to hear that.  Here's wishing strength to you and your family and good health to your husband.


----------



## Surlysomething

Oh shit, Megan. I'm so sorry to hear this. I know your husband is your best friend and the world to you and your boys. I hope you get family support soon. Tons and tons of my very best thoughts your way.







HottiMegan said:


> My husband had a stroke today. I'm so scared and sad. they say it was minor but still a stroke at 45.. not good.
> I had to leave him in the hospital so the boys could go to bed. It was so hard. The house is so lonely without him. He's my everything. He's why i get up, he is why i smile. He's my rock. Worst day so far in my life...


----------



## CAMellie

HottiMegan said:


> My husband had a stroke today. I'm so scared and sad. they say it was minor but still a stroke at 45.. not good.
> I had to leave him in the hospital so the boys could go to bed. It was so hard. The house is so lonely without him. He's my everything. He's why i get up, he is why i smile. He's my rock. Worst day so far in my life...



I'm so very sorry that this has happened to your best friend. You and your family are in my thoughts!


----------



## penguin

Oh Megan, I'm so sorry. I hope he has a speedy recovery.


----------



## littlefairywren

HottiMegan said:


> My husband had a stroke today. I'm so scared and sad. they say it was minor but still a stroke at 45.. not good.
> I had to leave him in the hospital so the boys could go to bed. It was so hard. The house is so lonely without him. He's my everything. He's why i get up, he is why i smile. He's my rock. Worst day so far in my life...



Sending positive thoughts and healing vibes for your dear husband, Megan.


----------



## Mathias

HottiMegan said:


> My husband had a stroke today. I'm so scared and sad. they say it was minor but still a stroke at 45.. not good.
> I had to leave him in the hospital so the boys could go to bed. It was so hard. The house is so lonely without him. He's my everything. He's why i get up, he is why i smile. He's my rock. Worst day so far in my life...



(((((((((Hugs)))))))) I hope he recovers soon.


----------



## Tad

So sorry to hear that, Megan. I hope his recovery is quick and uncomplicated, and I hope you can find a way to keep on with keeping on in the meantime--your stress levels must be off the scale right now  Fingers crossed for all of you.


----------



## Lovelyone

HottiMegan said:


> My husband had a stroke today. I'm so scared and sad. they say it was minor but still a stroke at 45.. not good.
> I had to leave him in the hospital so the boys could go to bed. It was so hard. The house is so lonely without him. He's my everything. He's why i get up, he is why i smile. He's my rock. Worst day so far in my life...



Wow he's so young,Megan. Saying prayers for all of you. Let's hope that since he's so young he will have a good comeback and he will get well soon.


----------



## moore2me

Megan,

I am sorry to hear about your husband's stroke. I hope he is soon back to normal. You and he have my prayers.

M2M

http://www.strokeassociation.org/STROKEORG/


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Oh geez, Megan, I'm so, so sorry. I hope he recovers very quickly. *big, big hugs*


----------



## HottiMegan

Thank you everyone.. I am highly stressed. I had a big, huge, scare the nurses panic attack today. So now my doc has me on a really nice, warming lorazapam. 

Hubs has been poked and prodded by everyone and it seems like he had a mild stroke but not a tia. He is doing pretty well. He's been turned down for speech and physical therapy because he's too high functioning. The therapists also are highly confident that he is so lightly affected, he will make a full recovery. I am hoping this is just a wake up call to slow down a little and care better for himself. I'm very scared of what the future will hold. He's super active and i thought he'd totally outlive me even though i'm 11 years younger than him.


----------



## penguin

That's great news, Megan! It's a good start for him.



I'm sad, mostly because I'm missing my daughter. She's with her dad for a week, halfway across the country. That, I can handle. But they've gone camping, so it'll be four days between saying goodbye to her at the airport and when I get to talk to her next. We would've spoken last night and tomorrow night, otherwise. So not having that is hard. I also have other stuff making me sad, stuff I can't do anything about but wait for other people to do what's needed. I need to do an essay for uni, but I'm dragging my feet on it because I just feel lonely and mopey.


----------



## Diana_Prince245

Megan, that is really good news about your hubby. The doctors will tell him some steps (change of diet, new meds) he can take to help lessen his chances of stroke in the future. Hugs!


----------



## Surlysomething

That's really great news, Megan. Still sending you tons of love and good thoughts though.

*hug*




HottiMegan said:


> Thank you everyone.. I am highly stressed. I had a big, huge, scare the nurses panic attack today. So now my doc has me on a really nice, warming lorazapam.
> 
> Hubs has been poked and prodded by everyone and it seems like he had a mild stroke but not a tia. He is doing pretty well. He's been turned down for speech and physical therapy because he's too high functioning. The therapists also are highly confident that he is so lightly affected, he will make a full recovery. I am hoping this is just a wake up call to slow down a little and care better for himself. I'm very scared of what the future will hold. He's super active and i thought he'd totally outlive me even though i'm 11 years younger than him.


----------



## HottiMegan

Thanks for the good thoughts. I'm scared like crazy but he's in good hands health wise.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

penguin said:


> That's great news, Megan! It's a good start for him.
> 
> 
> 
> I'm sad, mostly because I'm missing my daughter. She's with her dad for a week, halfway across the country. That, I can handle. But they've gone camping, so it'll be four days between saying goodbye to her at the airport and when I get to talk to her next. We would've spoken last night and tomorrow night, otherwise. So not having that is hard. I also have other stuff making me sad, stuff I can't do anything about but wait for other people to do what's needed. I need to do an essay for uni, but I'm dragging my feet on it because I just feel lonely and mopey.


Hugs, D. Being lonely is so incredibly hard.


----------



## Rojodi

At 8:22 AM my mother passed away. She had a two year fight with pancreatic and liver cancer, had a stroke 2 weeks ago, and they found brain lesions during an MRI.

What makes me sadder is that, I know it's the best thing for her. No more pain.


----------



## Lovelyone

Rojodi said:


> At 8:22 AM my mother passed away. She had a two year fight with pancreatic and liver cancer, had a stroke 2 weeks ago, and they found brain lesions during an MRI.
> 
> What makes me sadder is that, I know it's the best thing for her. No more pain.



Roger, I am so sorry for your loss.


----------



## Surlysomething

Very sorry for your loss.





Rojodi said:


> At 8:22 AM my mother passed away. She had a two year fight with pancreatic and liver cancer, had a stroke 2 weeks ago, and they found brain lesions during an MRI.
> 
> What makes me sadder is that, I know it's the best thing for her. No more pain.


----------



## snuggletiger

Rojodi said:


> At 8:22 AM my mother passed away. She had a two year fight with pancreatic and liver cancer, had a stroke 2 weeks ago, and they found brain lesions during an MRI.
> 
> What makes me sadder is that, I know it's the best thing for her. No more pain.




My condolences


----------



## HottiMegan

Rojodi said:


> At 8:22 AM my mother passed away. She had a two year fight with pancreatic and liver cancer, had a stroke 2 weeks ago, and they found brain lesions during an MRI.
> 
> What makes me sadder is that, I know it's the best thing for her. No more pain.



I'm so sorry for your loss. {{hugs}}


----------



## HottiMegan

I'm having a hard time see how hard simple things are for my husband. He's always been so capable and now he's having trouble just eating. (he's left handed and that's the side that got affected) He's aware of everything but there's a bit of a glazed look like he's trying hard to stay connected to what's going on. It scares me so much. I think i'm going to take a shower and just sob my heart out. I don't have an occasion to go hide somewhere and sob and mourn.


----------



## Tad

My sympathies on your loss, Rojodi.


----------



## Rojodi

Thank you everyone, now comes the difficult time. Not for me, but for my sister, having to deal with our aunt and our brother.


----------



## Mathias

I honestly wasn't sure whether or not I should post this but I can barely process all of this right now. This may come off as disturbing for this thread and I apologize but I really need some support and people to talk to.


Earlier this evening my mother got a call from the nursing home my grandmother has been living in. The head care giver of the facility had said there had been an incident where a nursing assistant had taken my grandmother out of her gown and tried to smother her with it. When she was found it'd been wrapped around her head and neck. Thankfully, she'salright and wasn't harmed physically and when my aunt went to see her this evening, she was her usual happy self. We still don't know all of the details but the most horrible thing about all of it is that it took place a month ago and someone who witnessed it just came forward today. We're all so upset right now. I can't stop crying and I don't know what to think. Why did this have to happen to her? Even worse, what else are they not telling us if it took them so long to report this? As of right now, an investigation has begun and the worker who did this was suspended. There are so many questions I have, but I'm just numb from shock.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

OMFG, Matt, suspended? That person should be in jail! Holy hell. I'm so glad your grandmother is alright.


----------



## Mathias

BigBeautifulMe said:


> OMFG, Matt, suspended? That person should be in jail! Holy hell. I'm so glad your grandmother is alright.



He, along with the witness will probably end up in jail as more details come out. At least that's what we're hoping. They abused her and didn't report it. My parents have reached out to a lawyer and they're also going to get her medically checked out to be safe.


----------



## HottiMegan

That's just awful. I really am glad that you guys are getting her checked out and i do hope the culprits will be punished. More than just suspension. That should be grounds for immediate firing. {{hugs to you and your family}}


----------



## 1love_emily

I hate my body.
I hate my skin.
I hate my PCOS. 
I hate that I have an epic mustache.
I hate my flabby arms
I hate my protruding belly
I hate that I can't say the word tummy or stomach or belly because immediately I think that people stare at mine. 
I hate that I can't wear cute swim suits.
I hate that I can't just unzip my skin, squish all the fat out, and resume life as a skinny girl.
I hate that my fatness is hurting my horse.
I hate that I cannot be loved romantically by anyone.
I hate that I hate myself.
I hate that I can't get myself to change my ways.
I hate that I can't find my cute jeans.
I hate that my thighs are dimpled with fat.
I hate that I can't wear athletic shorts because they rub and make me chafe.
I hate that I can't just sit in bed and feel sad.


----------



## bigmac

Have to go to the office picnic today and its going to be 110 freaking degrees. Seriously -- 110!!!! Fresno's not fit for human habitation.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

1love_emily said:


> I hate my body.
> I hate my skin.
> I hate my PCOS.
> I hate that I have an epic mustache.
> I hate my flabby arms
> I hate my protruding belly
> I hate that I can't say the word tummy or stomach or belly because immediately I think that people stare at mine.
> *I hate that I can't wear cute swim suits.*
> I hate that I can't just unzip my skin, squish all the fat out, and resume life as a skinny girl.
> I hate that my fatness is hurting my horse.
> *I hate that I cannot be loved romantically by anyone.*
> I hate that I hate myself.
> I hate that I can't get myself to change my ways.
> I hate that I can't find my cute jeans.
> I hate that my thighs are dimpled with fat.
> I hate that I can't wear athletic shorts because they rub and make me chafe.
> I hate that I can't just sit in bed and feel sad.



I am so sorry you're having such a bad day, Emily. I can't speak to the rest of your list, but I can tell you that at the very least the two things I've bolded above are NOT true. I am much larger than you (500+ pounds) and I can tell you right now... cute suits ARE possible.  And so is love. *Hugs, honey.* I hope things look better tomorrow.


----------



## Weirdo890

Mathias said:


> I honestly wasn't sure whether or not I should post this but I can barely process all of this right now. This may come off as disturbing for this thread and I apologize but I really need some support and people to talk to.
> 
> 
> Earlier this evening my mother got a call from the nursing home my grandmother has been living in. The head care giver of the facility had said there had been an incident where a nursing assistant had taken my grandmother out of her gown and tried to smother her with it. When she was found it'd been wrapped around her head and neck. Thankfully, she'salright and wasn't harmed physically and when my aunt went to see her this evening, she was her usual happy self. We still don't know all of the details but the most horrible thing about all of it is that it took place a month ago and someone who witnessed it just came forward today. We're all so upset right now. I can't stop crying and I don't know what to think. Why did this have to happen to her? Even worse, what else are they not telling us if it took them so long to report this? As of right now, an investigation has begun and the worker who did this was suspended. There are so many questions I have, but I'm just numb from shock.



I'm so sorry to hear that. 

I hope the you guys are able to nail the negligent care worker.


----------



## Weirdo890

I'm feeling lonely right now.


----------



## moore2me

1love_emily said:


> I hate my body.
> I hate my skin.
> I hate my PCOS.
> I hate that I have an epic mustache.
> I hate my flabby arms
> I hate my protruding belly
> I hate that I can't say the word tummy or stomach or belly because immediately I think that people stare at mine.
> I hate that I can't wear cute swim suits.
> *I hate that I can't just unzip my skin, squish all the fat out, and resume life as a skinny girl.
> I hate that my fatness is hurting my horse.*
> I hate that I cannot be loved romantically by anyone.
> I hate that I hate myself.
> I hate that I can't get myself to change my ways.
> I hate that I can't find my cute jeans.
> I hate that my thighs are dimpled with fat.
> *I hate that I can't wear athletic shorts because they rub and make me chafe.
> I hate that I can't just sit in bed and feel s*ad.



Well. I have a few more of your "dragons" to slay . . .

1. The part about just squishing all your fat out and being skinny didn't work for me. I had the WLS, lost a lot of weight, and the fat eventually came back to reside with me just like a long lost puppy. I couldn't keep it off. I now have other things as my goals and on my wish list.


2. The part about being too fat for your horse may be true - use your judgment as a equine trainer. There are two ways I see to fix this if the horse is too small - get a bigger horse. There is a horse for almost everyone, even Hoss Cartwright rode a nice horsie. Just buy one a little bigger and a little stronger. (And of course be prepared to fall farther when you have to hit the ground.)

An alternate use of your horse would be to teach it and you have to pull a cart or a small wagon. I have done this and enjoyed driving a wagon. You will probably have to get someone to go over the rudimentary tasks like harnessing or turning the horse. And the horse will have to be broke in to a harness - but after that there is some neat things you can do. Such as ride in parades, take children for rides, and competitive showing.

3. There are companies that sell athletic shorts to fat girls that do not chafe.
I buy mine from Junonia and they have a good selection of sports gear at larger sizes.

4. You can sit in bed and fret or feel sorry for yourself, but you are only allowed 10-15 minutes a day doing this. Any more would be a pity party and a useless waste of time. After your allotted time is up - get up and go about your life. What you don't like, narrow it down to just a few things, a work on that stuff a little every day. Then spend some time helping others deal with their problems.


----------



## balletguy

So in the past few months I got a demotion at work...with no cause.
I applied to a great job had 3 interviews and I still have not gotten a call back am guessing I did not get the job
In my current role at my company my boss totally fed something up and blamed me...

GRRRR


----------



## Mathias

A good friend of mine that I've known since high school passed away today. :really sad:


----------



## Lovelyone

The fourth of July is the third anniversary of my mother's passing. For everyone else it's a holiday but for me it's just the day my mom died.


----------



## AuntHen

Mathias said:


> A good friend of mine that I've known since high school passed away today. :really sad:



I am sorry to hear of your loss *HUGS*


----------



## Surlysomething

Sorry for your loss. It's tough losing anyone that young.





Mathias said:


> A good friend of mine that I've known since high school passed away today. :really sad:


----------



## snuggletiger

Lovelyone said:


> The fourth of July is the third anniversary of my mother's passing. For everyone else it's a holiday but for me it's just the day my mom died.



Wish I could say something to cheer you up


----------



## BBWbonnie

That The person I volunteer to see each week is so depressed and I don't know how to help! I feel very useless


----------



## ScreamingChicken

This damn tummy bug. A week of it is more than enough. I am tired, probably dehydrated, and just wish my energy level would get normal again.


----------



## snuggletiger

BigCutieBonnie said:


> That The person I volunteer to see each week is so depressed and I don't know how to help! I feel very useless



would ice cream, or a hug help?


----------



## Rojodi

A little selfishness: Now with my mother gone, Better Half and I no longer have date night on Fridays, the Progeny will come with us


----------



## Surlysomething

Isn't your kid old enough to stay home alone?





Rojodi said:


> A little selfishness: Now with my mother gone, Better Half and I no longer have date night on Fridays, the Progeny will come with us


----------



## Rojodi

Surlysomething said:


> Isn't your kid old enough to stay home alone?



Yes and THAT'S the problem


----------



## Surlysomething

Oh, he's not responsible enough. 

That sucks. Get him a babysitter. 



Rojodi said:


> Yes and THAT'S the problem


----------



## Rojodi

Surlysomething said:


> Oh, he's not responsible enough.
> 
> That sucks. Get him a babysitter.



No, he's responsible. The problem is that he'll be home when my wife and I will be...if you know what I mean


----------



## Tad

Rojodi said:


> No, he's responsible. The problem is that he'll be home when my wife and I will be...if you know what I mean



I have a 15 year old....I know _exactly _what you mean :doh:


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

I babysat for this couple for decades (still do, but as a family member more than anything else - they're like family to me now... their youngest is 12, oldest is mid-twenties.) It took me years (in my defense, when I started working for them I was young!) to realize what was going on... they'd be gone for five hours... going to "dinner and a movie" - but never came home with restaurant leftovers and always came home hungry. LOL. But I understand having an "evening out" every week would be expensive for most. Sorry Roj! Can you send him off to a sleepover with a friend?


----------



## Steve O

Having my wife being diagnosed with stage 4 cancer, and caring for our two children, one of them having significant special needs. Very scary.


----------



## Lovelyone

snuggletiger said:


> Wish I could say something to cheer you up



Thanks Christopher. You are always the one here who reads my postings and offer up a little kindness when it is needed. I appreciate you for that. (*hugs)


----------



## Tad

Steve O said:


> Having my wife being diagnosed with stage 4 cancer, and caring for our two children, one of them having significant special needs. Very scary.



My heart goes out to you. Best wishes for you and your family on things working out as well as possible.


----------



## NYCGabriel

I was recently let down by someone in a baffling way. It cut me deep and I still didn't recover. Hell, i dont know if I'll ever recover. Just another emotional scar to add. :\


----------



## CaAggieGirl

My mom lost her job today, I may need to pick up a third job to help with the slack.


----------



## Dromond

I am very sad. I can't share the reason why.


----------



## HottiMegan

Life is bringing me down. I so want to take a mini break from it and go somewhere for a couple days of fun...


----------



## Oona

My ex husband called to tell me he just married the girl that is supposed to have been my best friend. She confirmed it. 

He is the biggest jerk I've ever met and he has everything he wants while I still feel like I'm struggling to stay above water.


----------



## Mathias

Oona said:


> My ex husband called to tell me he just married the girl that is supposed to have been my best friend. She confirmed it.
> 
> He is the biggest jerk I've ever met and he has everything he wants while I still feel like I'm struggling to stay above water.



((((Oona)))) I'm sorry that happened to you. What a scumbag.


----------



## spiritangel

Oona said:


> My ex husband called to tell me he just married the girl that is supposed to have been my best friend. She confirmed it.
> 
> He is the biggest jerk I've ever met and he has everything he wants while I still feel like I'm struggling to stay above water.



Oona you know what they deserve each other.

Sometimes through struggle we gain far more and learn far more about who we are than we do through the smooth calm waters.

Lots of hugs and please remember you are Amazing and you will meet someone who will make all this one day just seem like a bad dream.


----------



## Oona

Mathias said:


> ((((Oona)))) I'm sorry that happened to you. What a scumbag.



-hugs- Thanks. I'm a little better today.



spiritangel said:


> Oona you know what they deserve each other.
> 
> Sometimes through struggle we gain far more and learn far more about who we are than we do through the smooth calm waters.
> 
> Lots of hugs and please remember you are Amazing and you will meet someone who will make all this one day just seem like a bad dream.



-hugs- thank you. I know this too will pass, but it just seems to be dragging on forever now. It's been 18 months already. I just want a break.


----------



## moore2me

Oona said:


> My ex husband called to tell me he just married the girl that is supposed to have been my best friend. She confirmed it.
> 
> He is the biggest jerk I've ever met and he has everything he wants
> *(Except he doesn't have you. Why do you think the newlywed groom bothered to call you?
> 
> * while I still feel like I'm struggling to stay above water.



*(What he owns fisically and what you own has very little to do with your old relationship. My ex-husband was a jerk too and thru the school of hard knocks, I got a graduate level education in how a pissant treats women at a bargain price.)

Your girlfriend may have her hands full pretty soon along with her heart broken. You should thank the fates that look after you that you are rid of this guy. You will find yourself much better off in the long run.*


----------



## Oona

moore2me said:


> *(What he owns fisically and what you own has very little to do with your old relationship. My ex-husband was a jerk too and thru the school of hard knocks, I got a graduate level education in how a pissant treats women at a bargain price.)
> 
> Your girlfriend may have her hands full pretty soon along with her heart broken. You should thank the fates that look after you that you are rid of this guy. You will find yourself much better off in the long run.*




It wasn't a matter of what he fiscally has. I was more referring to the fact that he has a wife (who, I agree, will soon see she got more than she bargained for), and family. In order to survive, I had to move to a city where I know no one because the cost of living is lower and I got a job offer. No friends, no family. 

I am extremely happy that I am rid of him on a romantic level. I will never be rid of him entirely, as we have a daughter together.


----------



## 1love_emily

I miss my friends.
I miss Dan because I screwed up what we had going.
I miss my barn friends before they stabbed me in the back.
I miss my Linnea. Now she's Chris' Linnea. She's changed since she started dating that boy.
I miss my Tass. My wonderful room mate is at a beautiful music camp when I'm sweating and dying all day at GS camp.
I miss playing trombone.
I miss my horse.

I'm ready for summer to be over so I can go back to real life.


----------



## HottiMegan

I'm sad that i will constantly have that bit of fear in my peripheral that something bad will happen to hubs. We're having a good time and joking around and that fear pops into the corner of my mind. He's doing really well getting his health in order but i'm so scared, that makes me sad that our relationship is forever altered. I now have to keep an eye on him and make sure he takes his meds. I'm sad that i'm afraid that will make him grow to resent me for constantly reminding him of stuff.


----------



## Surlysomething

They're the losers, sweetie. They cancel each other out.

You're the super-star. *hug*







Oona said:


> My ex husband called to tell me he just married the girl that is supposed to have been my best friend. She confirmed it.
> 
> He is the biggest jerk I've ever met and he has everything he wants while I still feel like I'm struggling to stay above water.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

They Trayvon Martin verdict.


----------



## cinnamitch

Same here. Just totally disheartened by the Justice system



BigBeautifulMe said:


> They Trayvon Martin verdict.


----------



## Dromond

The Zimmerman verdict and THIS CASE have me feeling both enraged and very sad.


----------



## Diana_Prince245

Dromond said:


> The Zimmerman verdict and THIS CASE have me feeling both enraged and very sad.



Not just you. The gloating makes me ill. Almost as ill as the tweet about coat hangers some conservative pundit sent out today.

I should probably post this in Hyde Park, but I need a break.


----------



## Fuzzy

HottiMegan said:


> I'm sad that i will constantly have that bit of fear in my peripheral that something bad will happen to hubs. We're having a good time and joking around and that fear pops into the corner of my mind. He's doing really well getting his health in order but i'm so scared, that makes me sad that our relationship is forever altered. I now have to keep an eye on him and *make sure he takes his meds*. I'm sad that i'm afraid that will make him grow to resent me for constantly reminding him of stuff.



I would be forever grateful for those reminders...


----------



## Mathias

Cory Monteith from Glee died.


----------



## CAMellie

First the verdict and now Cory Monteith...I just can't stop crying.


----------



## moore2me

HottiMegan said:


> *I'm sad that i will constantly have that bit of fear in my peripheral that something bad will happen to hubs. We're having a good time and joking around and that fear pops into the corner of my mind. He's doing really well getting his health in order but i'm so scared, that makes me sad that our relationship is forever altered. I now have to keep an eye on him and make sure he takes his meds.* I'm sad that i'm afraid that will make him grow to resent me for constantly reminding him of stuff.



Megan,

Keeping an eye on our menfolks (young and old) and making sure they take their meds, wear clean socks, wash their hands after doing yard work, etc, etc. is one of the unwritten tasks women take upon themselves. All of us do it. It is bred into our genetic material as strongly as breathing and craving chocolate.

It is also our job to remind men constantly of these things. It is also called *nagging.* You will find that men usually take their pills or go to their doc's checkups partially to avoid our nagging. Your mom and her mom did it as far back as the beginning of marriage. (Helpful hint - I practice nagging on myself or on the dogs.)


----------



## Morganer

I looked for a Panda Express in SoHo today, but I had to settle for a Popeyes.


----------



## 1love_emily

They found the man that brutally murdered my younger brother's best friend today. He's under arrest and currently in custody.
I should be relieved or happy or something, but I'm just sad that the worst day in my life, and in my younger brothers life, has to be continually brought up. 
I'm ready for the ordeal to be over with.


----------



## Surlysomething

Good that they caught him. 

So sorry for your loss...can't imagine how painful and hard this must be.




1love_emily said:


> They found the man that brutally murdered my younger brother's best friend today. He's under arrest and currently in custody.
> I should be relieved or happy or something, but I'm just sad that the worst day in my life, and in my younger brothers life, has to be continually brought up.
> I'm ready for the ordeal to be over with.


----------



## cinnamitch

Two people I used to work with died within a few days of each other. We had some great times working the night shift together.


----------



## Surlysomething

That's just shitty.

Sorry, chickie.



cinnamitch said:


> Two people I used to work with died within a few days of each other. We had some great times working the night shift together.


----------



## imaginarydiva21

its 2.45 am and im still typing up corsework due in the morning blah i feel zombiefied


----------



## TwilightStarr

My dad who has been a diabetic since I was 10, is having his big toe amputated tomorrow morning 
I would've thought that after losing his mother to diabetes, being a diabetic for the last 19 years, and being in multiple diabetic comas, that he would take his diabetes serious.


----------



## Weirdo890

I can't let go of my control freak tendencies, and it's driving me crazy.


----------



## penguin

I feel broken.


----------



## mimosa

I am praying for less heart aches, more love, more peace, more joy.


----------



## Dromond

I don't know which way to turn.


----------



## spiritangel

Dromond said:


> I don't know which way to turn.



Hugs maybe just wait a little and see if an answer is revealed?


----------



## Dromond

spiritangel said:


> Hugs maybe just wait a little and see if an answer is revealed?



I'm faced with a potentially life altering decision and I don't know what to do. I can't see any good solutions no matter which way I look. Sorry I can't be more specific.


----------



## spiritangel

Dromond said:


> I'm faced with a potentially life altering decision and I don't know what to do. I can't see any good solutions no matter which way I look. Sorry I can't be more specific.



Its ok you know you can always pm me here or on fb if you need to talk it out and bounce ideas around.

Sounds heavy and important. I hope you find your way through it, the best course is usually to go with your gut. Lots of Hugs


----------



## Lovelyone

Dromond said:


> I don't know which way to turn.



I hope that you find your way to a decision without too much worry.


----------



## Dromond

Thank you.

I've come to a decision. It's painful, but necessary.


----------



## spiritangel

Dromond said:


> Thank you.
> 
> I've come to a decision. It's painful, but necessary.



hugs Dro, I wish I had wise words or something to say to help ease the burden even just a little.

Lots of squishy hugs and know I am here if you need me.


----------



## CastingPearls

What's making me sad is this: My family had expected me to be a full-time unpaid caregiver to my father once he came home from the rehab facility after his stroke. He was home for a week and a half and it was a nightmare. He's verbally abusive (always has been but the stroke exacerbated it) and I was physically injured in trying to lift him because I had no help. No agency, no relative, nobody was able or willing to give me the kind of help necessary to handle this. Not to mention that he was not safe because I couldn't lift him and we had called an ambulance several times because of falling in those ten days. While I was injured and couldn't lift him, and was out of the house picking up mail, meds and groceries, he panicked and forced my 89 year old grandmother to walk out into the busy road with her walker and flag down a car. Security found her screaming hysterically and when I got home, he tried to hide what happened, but security told me, and that night my grandmother's blood glucose level was nearly 500. (I give her insulin injections). Security said they were considering calling local police because her life was put in danger by him. And worse, I could be held accountable. But they decided to just keep an eye on us when I told them I was working on alternate ideas. 

After a visiting nurse and physical therapist witnessed his being abusive and my being physically unable to lift someone who weighs more than me but only has use of half his body, they called social services and we were able to get my dad into a nursing facility where they're much more equipped to take care of his needs. Then my uncle finally came through and I found that he was in ill health but he and his wife would help me locate an assisted living facility for my grandmother. All I needed to do was find a home for her parakeet and his cat and I was unsuccessful, so my uncle and aunt took them too where they're very happy. 

I packed up and drove from northeastern PA to TX with my cat over 3 1/2 days, with some donations from a few friends who stepped up for me. I'm staying with friends until I can afford to begin again on my own somewhere.

It didn't matter that I had done all this for my dad and made sure that he was in a safe place, that my grandmother was in a safe place and homes were found for pets. My only remaining brother who was a co-abuser with my dad while we were growing up was enraged that I had 'escaped' and began to harass me via text, email and cell. I blocked him where I could so this guy who didn't see his father once since the stroke, showed up to assume power of attorney, sell the house and make sure I didn't have a home to return to. He began to convince my dad, who's cognitive ability has been compromised, that it was me who did nothing and he who did everything.

I began to close communication loopholes. Although my therapist had 'graduated' me, she and I keep in touch and she had warned me all hell would break loose because they had lost control over me. It wasn't enough that I was enforcing No Contact with them, but she suggested I legally change my name which I'm considering. 

The other day I was out with my hosts and the heat was getting to me so I sat in the truck while they ran into Walmart. My friend's son had a bug zapper shaped like a badminton racquet and a pellet gun, well, shaped like a gun. I made a joke about 'Murica and they took a pic of me which I posted to FB. Anyone who knows me, knows it was clearly a joke. My brother somehow got hold of the pic and drove to PA and showed it to my dad who was very alarmed and woke me early this morning telling me maybe my brother was right, that I lost my mind and he's selling the house and am I coming back (to take care of him) and I couldn't get over that my brother who wouldn't send his own father a card since his stroke, who wouldn't call me to ask if I needed any help, who in fact, ignored my pleas for help, would DRIVE 200 miles, would invest that much time into scaring his father and trying to hurt me. I don't know why I'm surprised. I've seen him brutalize my youngest brother, who was a suicide due to our child abuse. I've seen him torture animals. But the face he shows the world is one of normality and in spite of the past, even I almost believe it for a moment, that perhaps he changed. 

I have nothing. I have a little cat, bills from my divorce, and whatever I could fit in my car. I sold all my jewelry to pay the retainer for my divorce attorney and then the few heirloom pieces that I had saved for an emergency, I sold to help fund this trip. Meanwhile, my brother continues to slander me, and is so invested in convincing people that I have caused my own sorrow and grief and even his, by not following HIS orders to stay home and take care of dad, to stay with my abusive husband, and repent (he's not even religious) and if I don't ask HIM for forgiveness, there is no relationship.

His narcissism doesn't allow him to comprehend that there is no relationship. He thinks that it's over when he says it's over, even if all it consists of him harassing, ridiculing and slandering me. He is dead to me. The best of my family is dead or safe at a distance. It's sad but I've started over before, and with nothing then too, but it's wearying and I don't really know what tomorrow will bring. I have exhausted every agency I can think of to help ME and there's nothing. Resources don't exist, budgets have been cut. It might come down to me living in my car with my cat and if that's what it takes, then so be it.


----------



## Marlayna

Casting Pearls: Perhaps there's a church group that can help you with your situation. Maybe you can find a live-in nanny job that will allow you to keep your cat with you. Good luck, and I hope your mean brother leaves you alone.


----------



## spiritangel

Lainey You are brave and Amazing, your family is another kettle of fish and I can think of no kind words for what any of them have put you through.

You need to block your brother from your fb completely.

Lots of hugs and I am always here if you need someone to talk to. Wish things were going better for you.


----------



## CastingPearls

spiritangel said:


> Lainey You are brave and Amazing, your family is another kettle of fish and I can think of no kind words for what any of them have put you through.
> 
> You need to block your brother from your fb completely.
> 
> Lots of hugs and I am always here if you need someone to talk to. Wish things were going better for you.


Amanda,
I have blocked him and his entire extended in-law family. He's still harassing me via text. I've upped my security settings and either someone must be feeding him, or I closed the last hole and his latest texts are out of frustration because he now has no access. 

Thank you, Marlayna. I've had no luck with church groups and I will probably be headed back east at some point but not near my family. The church groups that I've contacted have all said they would pray and that this is a storm that is testing me, etc. and I respect their beliefs, but it doesn't help me. I was actually a nanny years ago and loved it, but have chronic fatigue as a symptom of a condition I have, so chasing children is out. Thank you for your suggestions, sincerely.


----------



## spiritangel

I figured you would have done all of that was just trying to think.

Could you change your mobile number and just give it to the people you want to have it???

Lots and lots of hugs I really wish I had helpful words or a way to help you


----------



## ButlerGirl09

I feel like my family just can't catch a break... We have had so many losses and illness or injuries over the last few years. Today, my father was admitted to the hospital because he has a blood clot in each lung and another in his left calf.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Oh, M., that's so awful.  I am so sorry. I hope the blood thinners work well and he's out of there soon and safely! *hugs*


----------



## Mathias

My driving eval that was tomorrow got cancelled because everyone before and after my appointment cancelled and the lady's reasoning was, and I quote, "It doesn't make sense for me to make that commute only for just one person." I'm livid right now and told her that this is unacceptable considering I called out of work only to be told it can't happen because of what was (in my opinion) an excuse. My learning to drive has just become nothing but a fucking joke.


----------



## ButlerGirl09

And it continues... A good friend of mine was injured in this freak accident today http://my.chicagotribune.com/#section/545/article/p2p-76860412/


----------



## Mathias

ButlerGirl09 said:


> And it continues... A good friend of mine was injured in this freak accident today http://my.chicagotribune.com/#section/545/article/p2p-76860412/



I hope your friend is alright. I'm sorry for everything you and your family are going through. ((((Hugs))))


----------



## Oona

The seemingly constant rejection.


----------



## snuggletiger

ButlerGirl09 said:


> And it continues... A good friend of mine was injured in this freak accident today http://my.chicagotribune.com/#section/545/article/p2p-76860412/



Hope your friend is ok. Hope she recovers, lucky it wasn't worse from what the article said  but still very scary for everybody near there.
Wonder why they're only inspected every 5 years like the fire escapes, you'd think it'd be an annual preventive maintenance inspection.


----------



## HottiMegan

I'm sad because i'm away from my baby boy on his birthday. I didn't want to make waves at the fact that my father in law wanted the boys for a week and he could ONLY do it this week. I am down and sad because i want my boy in my arms for his special day. hubs doesn't get why i'm so sad. I miss my baby.


----------



## Lovelyone

I am sad because I think there is something mentally wrong with someone close to me. Due to previous experience with the matter I cannot make a suggestion for them to go get some help without stirring waves and ending up in a huge screaming match with them. I just don't have the where-with-all to deal with this kind of thing these days, so I mind my own business and hope that at some point she sees that shes got issues and needs some help.


----------



## Dromond

Jackie and I were out doing grocery shopping today, which gave us time to talk about matters without the kids around. I understand her better now, and that's good. My left brain is beginning to regain control of my right brain and I'm thinking more clearly now. At one point I thought I'd end up hating her, but that's not going to happen. I have to resist the occasional urge to call her pet names or touch her tenderly. Fact is, I still love her regardless of the fact she doesn't love me. But because she doesn't love me, I'm not going to sit here and pine. That's pointless. I'm getting on with my life.


----------



## missyj1978

Thinking about sleeping in my king size bed alone again Think it's time to downsize, maybe it wont feel so empty.


----------



## HottiMegan

I'm sad that I'm getting to the point that i hate the dog that my menfolk just HAD to get. He's ruining our house. I'm stuck at home with the beast i never wanted.


----------



## ODFFA

A friend of mine from another town is visiting me for a few days and his incessant sarcasm is grating my nerves a little. I have to spend another whole day with him when, actually, I just need a bit of a break. 

On top of which, my mom just told me that my dad has lost his job. It makes me want to cancel our dinner reservation for tonight. This is turning out to be a pretty sad birthday.


----------



## spiritangel

ODFFA said:


> A friend of mine from another town is visiting me for a few days and his incessant sarcasm is grating my nerves a little. I have to spend another whole day with him when, actually, I just need a bit of a break.
> 
> On top of which, my mom just told me that my dad has lost his job. It makes me want to cancel our dinner reservation for tonight. This is turning out to be a pretty sad birthday.



So Sorry to hear this  I was so hoping you would have a really good birthday sooo 

On a Random day when things are loads better you are just going to have to have a very very happy UNBIRTHDAY instead

Lots and lots of hugs, and remember the only thing that seems to really help me through times like this 'This to shall pass'


----------



## Surlysomething

Well shit. 

Breathe. Happy Birthday though and I bet next year's will be amazing, that's the way it works when you're an adult. You get one shitty birthday like every five years or so then you have a SUPER awesome one. 

Try and have something delicious today and get some hugs and stuff. We all love you here. 








ODFFA said:


> A friend of mine from another town is visiting me for a few days and his incessant sarcasm is grating my nerves a little. I have to spend another whole day with him when, actually, I just need a bit of a break.
> 
> On top of which, my mom just told me that my dad has lost his job. It makes me want to cancel our dinner reservation for tonight. This is turning out to be a pretty sad birthday.


----------



## snuggletiger

Surlysomething said:


> Well shit.
> 
> Breathe. Happy Birthday though and I bet next year's will be amazing, that's the way it works when you're an adult. You get one shitty birthday like every five years or so then you have a SUPER awesome one.
> 
> Try and have something delicious today and get some hugs and stuff. We all love you here.



Just pick a day and have a BIRTHDAY DO OVER. Complete with Cake and Ice Cream and funny hats.


----------



## HottiMegan

ODFFA said:


> A friend of mine from another town is visiting me for a few days and his incessant sarcasm is grating my nerves a little. I have to spend another whole day with him when, actually, I just need a bit of a break.
> 
> On top of which, my mom just told me that my dad has lost his job. It makes me want to cancel our dinner reservation for tonight. This is turning out to be a pretty sad birthday.



THat just sucks. I'm sorry your day is sucking. My birthday sucked this year too. I hope your upcoming year will be much better!


----------



## spiritangel

A friend just dumped a truckload of negativity on me because I asked her to please not add me to bulk messages she sends in the future something I ask all my friends who do it to me on fb.

Apparently it was the final straw but what really got me is she has obviously been carrying around a lot of resentment for some time now and instead of calling me to talk to me about it she slaps me via fb with it.


----------



## CastingPearls

Someone who's been my friend for many years has not been my friend and may never have been. If it were just indifference it would be one thing but it's outright cruelty and without cause. I wanted to believe the best about her and overlooking the worst was my own mistake but I never anticipated this. 

Lessons learned.


----------



## penguin

Feeling like I can't do anything right lately


----------



## Twilley

Same as before. All of my friends are moving on to the next part of their lives, and what's more MOVING, and I am here and alone and directionless and miserable.

Also, and hardly related, but I hate dating sites. People talk to you for a bit, things seem to be going well, then they drop off the face of the planet.


----------



## spiritangel

Twilley said:


> Same as before. All of my friends are moving on to the next part of their lives, and what's more MOVING, and I am here and alone and directionless and miserable.
> 
> Also, and hardly related, but I hate dating sites. People talk to you for a bit, things seem to be going well, then they drop off the face of the planet.



Hugs hugs and more hugs 

I hear you re the dating site thing, though today has taught me that I seem to attract people who well need a lot of compassion

Today a pre- op transexual a guy who is becomming a woman and who does not understand that I am not into women. I have been polite and gentle and because his attitude is but I am single babe (his words) I have told him to be very honest with the women he talks to. Because I can not imagine having gotten to know him and then finding this out would not have been a good thing.


----------



## Twilley

spiritangel said:


> Hugs hugs and more hugs
> 
> I hear you re the dating site thing, though today has taught me that I seem to attract people who well need a lot of compassion
> 
> Today a pre- op transexual a guy who is becomming a woman and who does not understand that I am not into women. I have been polite and gentle and because his attitude is but I am single babe (his words) I have told him to be very honest with the women he talks to. Because I can not imagine having gotten to know him and then finding this out would not have been a good thing.



Thank you for the sympathy <3

Also, i have a close pre-op trans friend who was asking me about something similar. He doesn't have too much dating experience, the poor dear.


----------



## Avienew

My dog is sick and at the vets getting antibiotics through an IV...missing her like mad :really sad:


----------



## Iannathedriveress

My girlfriend and I are taking a break from our relationship.


----------



## largenlovely

CastingPearls said:


> Someone who's been my friend for many years has not been my friend and may never have been. If it were just indifference it would be one thing but it's outright cruelty and without cause. I wanted to believe the best about her and overlooking the worst was my own mistake but I never anticipated this.
> 
> Lessons learned.



I've had this happen and it's so upsetting when you're completely blind sided and had no idea. It made me question my judgment about people. I'm sorry *hugs*


----------



## Dromond

I shelled out $600 for repairs on my truck, which took a huge bite out of the money I've set aside for moving expenses. So today I sold my comic book collection to try to climb out of that hole. I got a good price for it, but for the first time since I began buying comic books at age sixteen, I have no comic books. I know this qualifies as a first world problem, but nevertheless it's making me very sad.


----------



## snuggletiger

Dromond said:


> I shelled out $600 for repairs on my truck, which took a huge bite out of the money I've set aside for moving expenses. So today I sold my comic book collection to try to climb out of that hole. I got a good price for it, but for the first time since I began buying comic books at age sixteen, I have no comic books. I know this qualifies as a first world problem, but nevertheless it's making me very sad.



Its never a joy to give up a collection you've spent years building up.


----------



## Oona

My family is no where near as accepting as I thought they would be of this...


----------



## missyj1978

My daughters bestfriend's parents are JERKS! I feel so bad for that girl they wont buy her new school stuff but can buy drugs?! BAD BAD parents, no wonder she wants to move in with me They told her she can buy her own stuff, she is 13!!!


----------



## Oona

I told him 6 days ago and he won't respond to my calls/text messages. I think I'm in this alone...


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

If you mean what I think you mean, don't let him get away with that. He owes you child support at the very minimum. Hopefully he'll decide at some point that he wants to be in the child's life. I'm so sorry you're going through this.... *big hugs*

(And if I'm wrong about what that meant, sorry! lol)


----------



## Weirdo890

I was diagnosed with moderate to severe depression yesterday. My doctor change my med dosage to help fight it, but I'm waiting for it to take effect. I'm so sick of this.


----------



## spiritangel

I am sad so many of you took sides, when I have been a good and supportive friend but I do understand and hold no hard feelings


----------



## missyj1978

I am sad that I cant be where I want to be and its so dang hard.


----------



## Oona

Today is like a nightmare that won't end.


----------



## wjn319

Oona said:


> Today is like a nightmare that won't end.



Sorry kiddo.


----------



## TwilightStarr

Went to family court today about the custody of my nephew and even though my sister hasn't done a single thing she was suppose to in the past 4 months, she is knocked up with her drug dealing ex's baby, & she told them today that she wanted to go ahead and sign over full custody to my mom, they wouldn't give us custody!!! 

WTF?!?! Even if she had done a single damn thing that she was suppose to, she said she wanted to sign him over, it's her decision, how in the hell can they say that she can't?!?!

And I will up and move us to Canada before I let someone take that kid from me!!!


----------



## Tracyarts

The past couple of months have been one kick in the gut after another for me. 

I lost my two old Siamese cats within a couple of weeks of each other in July. The younger one (15) had gotten sick and wasn't able to get over it. The older one (16) was apparently just at the end of her natural life because the vet couldn't find anything wrong with her when she started acting off. 

But that was only the warm-up. 

Early last week my mom passed away. She was in the advanced stages of Alzheimer's, so while sad, it wasn't a shock. We hadn't been close since I was a kid, and didn't have much of a relationship once I reached adulthood. But still she was my mom, and the last of my immediate family (brother died in infancy, grandparents all by the end of my teens, and dad 8 years ago). I don't have much to do with any of my extended family, because they don't feel that I did enough to take care of my mom as her dementia got worse. I did what I could, given the health issues I was dealing with, and what I felt was appropriate, given her wishes. But it wasn't what they expected of me, so I caught a massive amount of shit from some of her family and neighbors. 

I have to meet with my uncle and cousin to start dealing with the process of emptying out her house, and getting it ready to sell. Technically I inherited the house, but the years she spent in a dementia care facility and then nursing home were very expensive, more than her social security, pension, and retirement would cover. So, the assets in her estate will go to finish settling up the bill. I'm not looking forward to that. It's going to be a physically and emotionally draining task. But the sooner it's done, the sooner all the legalities and financial obligations can be taken care of.

And if that wasn't enough...

My Other Significant Other is having surgery tomorrow. It's a routine procedure, but he's a high risk patient. While they don't anticipate complications, they just can't guarantee things will go smoothly. Once he's out of surgery and ready to start recovering, I'll be able to relax. But for now I just feel SO weary and weighed down.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

I am so sorry, Tracy.  That's so much to have happen in such a short period of time. Fingers crossed that your OSO's surgery goes off without a hitch tomorrow. Hugs.


----------



## Tracyarts

" Fingers crossed that your OSO's surgery goes off without a hitch tomorrow. "

He totally breezed through it, and should recover pretty quickly now. So, now that it's over and done with, I have time to catch my breath and recharge a little before I have to start working on the house.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

YAY! That is great news.


----------



## Sweetie

I am sad because I feel tired all the time no matter how many vitamins I take, how good I am about taking my meds, how much I sleep. I feel like life is just speeding by without me because I'm just too tired to do anything.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Sweetie said:


> I am sad because I feel tired all the time no matter how many vitamins I take, how good I am about taking my meds, how much I sleep. I feel like life is just speeding by without me because I'm just too tired to do anything.


Any chance you could have sleep apnea? I spent years feeling the exact same way.


----------



## Diana_Prince245

BigBeautifulMe said:


> Any chance you could have sleep apnea? I spent years feeling the exact same way.



Or a thyroid with decreased function? I had similar problems for a couple years before I was diagnosed.


----------



## Sweetie

I have sleep apnea, underactive thyroid (taking levothyroxin), fibromyalgia, IBS and depression. I'm sure they all contribute to the feeling of being tired, but sometimes I get so frustrated. I take all the meds I'm supposed to but sometimes it just isn't enough. Yesterday I was just feeling extra frustrated. Thanks for your support.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

And you're using CPAP for your apnea, yeah? Just checking because it made such a huge difference in my life... not trying to butt into your business!


----------



## Sweetie

BigBeautifulMe said:


> And you're using CPAP for your apnea, yeah? Just checking because it made such a huge difference in my life... not trying to butt into your business!



I need to get a new machine. Mine is dead.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

That's probably where your tiredness is coming from (but you probably knew that already).  I hope you get a new one soon!


----------



## SprocketRocket

A former Montana high school teacher convicted of raping a 14-year-old female student who later committed suicide will face only 30 days of jail time.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/08/27/stacy-rambold-raped-suicidal-student_n_3822640.html


----------



## CleverBomb

I'm trying to add a class (after it's started), and the odds are pretty good that I'll be able to. The thing that makes me sad is that if I can, it will be because someone who is already enrolled had to drop it, and that I might be getting the classroom seat in place of someone else who was also trying to add it.


----------



## Your Plump Princess

I miss him, I miss seeing him on skype and playing games with him, and now chances are we won't be able to do either of those things until november/december when his friends are able to get a place with him. :.( It hasn't even been a full month since I've seen him last, and I cry at last once a day.


----------



## AuntHen

Your Plump Princess said:


> I miss him, I miss seeing him on skype and playing games with him, and now chances are we won't be able to do either of those things until november/december when his friends are able to get a place with him. :.( It hasn't even been a full month since I've seen him last, and I cry at last once a day.



First let me say that I am sorry you are feeling so sad right now and have totally "been there done that" with those "missing" feelings. Second, I know you are not asking for any advice but I just thought I would tell you that the best remedy for this is to get *very *busy. Studies, work, hobbies, long walks, etc... basically anything to keep your mind and body occupied.

I hope you feel better soon!


----------



## Hozay J Garseeya

fat9276 said:


> First let me say that I am sorry you are feeling so sad right now and have totally "been there done that" with those "missing" feelings. Second, I know you are not asking for any advice but I just thought I would tell you that the best remedy for this is to get *very *busy. Studies, work, hobbies, long walks, etc... basically anything to keep your mind and body occupied.
> 
> I hope you feel better soon!



I'm going to go ahead and take this advice for myself as well.


----------



## AuntHen

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> I'm going to go ahead and take this advice for myself as well.




atta boy! to you I just would have said, quit your whining and get busy!


----------



## Hozay J Garseeya

fat9276 said:


> atta boy! to you I just would have said, quit your whining and get busy!



Hahaha thanks. I've been doing my best to keep mentally busy. The one day I didn't I ended up getting drunk by noon and sending inappropriate pictures of myself, watched Django and cried when Dr. Schulz was killed. Not a good day.


----------



## AuntHen

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> Hahaha thanks. I've been doing my best to keep mentally busy. The one day I didn't I ended up getting drunk by noon and sending inappropriate pictures of myself, watched Django and cried when Dr. Schulz was killed. Not a good day.




hmmm, maybe not a *good *day but certainly an INTERESTING one haha


----------



## LeoGibson

I can't really say that it is making me sad, but I have read this thread and also taken into consideration my posts on other forums, as well as real-life interactions. I have come to the realization that I view life very wildly different from almost everybody else. I'm not sad because of it, but maybe a little bit concerned, or intrigued.


----------



## missyj1978

That I cant talk to the person I need and want to talk to. Guess I better get use to it, life goes on..


----------



## Donna

I killed a snake. It was trying to hurt my Chihuahua and I am very afraid of snakes, but it's still a creature and I took its life.


----------



## firefly

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> I'm going to go ahead and take this advice for myself as well.



Start with answering to a PM you got!


----------



## Hozay J Garseeya

firefly said:


> Start with answering to a PM you got!



Hahaha, right away ma'am!


----------



## Your Plump Princess

fat9276 said:


> First let me say that I am sorry you are feeling so sad right now and have totally "been there done that" with those "missing" feelings. Second, I know you are not asking for any advice but I just thought I would tell you that the best remedy for this is to get *very *busy. Studies, work, hobbies, long walks, etc... basically anything to keep your mind and body occupied.
> 
> I hope you feel better soon!



Thank you! I keep busy for the most part, but when I lay down for bed it catches up with me, and then I can't sleep and I can't shake it. I haven't been able to actually sleep 'normal' yet, I usually have to just wait until I'm so tired my brain is fuzzy.


----------



## Librarygirl

A better job has come up in another dept at work and though part of me wants to àpply I know I will be under qualified compared to others likely to go for this type of role. Add into the mix the fact that my temperamental current boss would prob not approve. And the fact the interview would prob be with the BHM I am friends with and secretly in love with and his scary boss. And yet part of me wonders if that was what it was all about when he seemed oh so interested in the one qualification I have that might be considered relevant to the role. Confused right now. In any case I think his part time assistant / lecturer has been lined up for the role. It sucks! Why do they go through the charade of applications and interviews?? My assistant is also facing an interview for a job we all know is already as good as someone else's (a more favoured person).


----------



## SprocketRocket

Going to soon be all out of pizza!


----------



## Yakatori

LeoGibson said:


> "_...I have read this thread and also taken into consideration my posts on other forums, as well as real-life interactions. I have come to the realization that I view life very wildly different from almost everybody else.... maybe a little bit concerned, or intrigued._"


When I hear the phrase "get-busy," I'm thinking of...


----------



## AuntHen

Yakatori said:


> When I hear the phrase "get-busy," I'm thinking of...




this doesn't surprise me Yak 

by the way, I wasted, errr I mean *used *my 3,000th post on you! haha


----------



## SprocketRocket

I have alll this money for food, and I have to keep it secret, and use it in such a non-productive way.


----------



## rg770Ibanez

Just had to say goodbye to mah baby  

View attachment IMG_20130203_101528.jpg


----------



## Tad

rg770Ibanez said:


> Just had to say goodbye to mah baby



Awwww....what happened?


----------



## HottiMegan

I had ice pick headaches all weekend and now i have a pretty bad all over, constant headache. I wanted to go to tae kwon do today but i don't think my head will let me. I hate when my body lets me down.


----------



## rg770Ibanez

Tad said:


> Awwww....what happened?



Lol I had to sell it for the monies. Tis life


----------



## Marlayna

Donna said:


> I killed a snake. It was trying to hurt my Chihuahua and I am very afraid of snakes, but it's still a creature and I took its life.


 I'm glad your little doggy wasn't hurt. I know exactly how you feel, and it doesn't feel good to kill a living creature. I'm so sorry you had to experience that.


----------



## LeoGibson

rg770Ibanez said:


> Lol I had to sell it for the monies. Tis life



I feel your pain brother, but I never sell guitars! I might pawn them, but never sell them outright. Here's to hoping I never have to, and that one day you get yours back, or one even better!


----------



## Your Plump Princess

I've been emailing with my boyfriends mother now for about a month, and it's going decently, I was actually happy she was trying to get to know me. She even told him how it made her happy to be conversing with me.

Then today, he skyped with his parents, and his mother kept questioning him about "How can you find her attractive?, What are you, some kind of sick chubby chaser? If you REALLY loved her, you'd be aggressive towards her and push her to lose weight so she's around longer!" etc etc. He laughed about it because she was so flabbergasted at his desire for me, he even said "uhhh because she IS attractive?" to which his mother scoffed.. It just kind of makes my heart sink back into the reality that it's always gonna be looked down that he's with a fat girl. 

Lovely. Fucking lovely. I'm not human, I'm a fucking fat person. 
Just when I thought there was hope .___.;


----------



## AuntHen

Your Plump Princess said:


> I'm Lovely. I'm human, I'm a person.




Fixed it!


----------



## Mathias

I feel so lonely all of the time now.


----------



## missyj1978

Laying in my King sized bed all alone  This bed was made for 2 people dang it!


----------



## Tad

Your Plump Princess said:


> Lovely. Fucking lovely. I'm not human, I'm a fucking fat person.
> Just when I thought there was hope .___.;



There is still hope. That she is emailing with you, and that she wants him to get you to lose weight means that she accepts that this is long term and she is making some effort to make a connection.

Be patient, keep working on it, and eventually she'll (probably) see the person more than the fat. With familiarity most people do drift that way.

FWIW, my mom had a few issues with my wife when we were dating-engaged-first married, but then my wife ended up living with them for a few months while on a work placement as part of her degree, and after that all was good. I was terrified about how that was going to go at first, but all those good things that I loved about my wife were also apparent to my parents upon more prolonged exposure.


----------



## CleverBomb

Repped out at the moment, but ^^^this^^^


----------



## cinnamitch

Sad? Well every once in awhile a bad case of depression sets in. I'm 51 and disabled. I had a good career, made good money and now I live on disability income. My marriage broke up 13 years ago and MY GOD, what a bunch of crazy men one runs into in the dating world. SHEESH!. I never thought I would face my so called golden years alone. Most of the time I am ok with it, but every once in awhile it really hits me and it isn't a wonderful feeling. It could be worse, but it could be better as well.


----------



## HeavyDuty24

rg770Ibanez said:


> Just had to say goodbye to mah baby



I would have been crying dude. We all have a special bond with our guitars.  Heart goes out to you man.


----------



## HeavyDuty24

LeoGibson said:


> I feel your pain brother, but I never sell guitars! I might pawn them, but never sell them outright. Here's to hoping I never have to, and that one day you get yours back, or one even better!



I agree man! i never sell my guitars, i will sell everything else before i do! Lol.


----------



## Iannathedriveress

I got a call from my boss and I just got sidelined. I feel hopeless because I felt that I finally had a secured future.


----------



## HottiMegan

I'm not certain of my future in my marriage. I don't think there's a lack of love.. just lack of affection on his part. I'm trying really hard to bide my time while he gets back into a good place but not even having hugs or kisses for days upon days is so hard. The only time i get a kiss is when i initiate it.. The only time there is a physical touch between us is when i initiate it. I feel like i'm starving. I miss him so much.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

HottiMegan said:


> I'm not certain of my future in my marriage. I don't think there's a lack of love.. just lack of affection on his part. I'm trying really hard to bide my time while he gets back into a good place but not even having hugs or kisses for days upon days is so hard. The only time i get a kiss is when i initiate it.. The only time there is a physical touch between us is when i initiate it. I feel like i'm starving. I miss him so much.



Oh Megan.. I am a very touchy-feely person and I can only imagine how difficult that has to be.  Have you talked to hubs about it and told him you miss him and it's making you sad?


----------



## HottiMegan

BigBeautifulMe said:


> Oh Megan.. I am a very touchy-feely person and I can only imagine how difficult that has to be.  Have you talked to hubs about it and told him you miss him and it's making you sad?



It is hard. I haven't bluntly come out and told him but every time we hug or kiss, i say it's been days or a long time. I am trying really hard not to burden him with my sadness or desires because he's still in recovery. It's just making me down in the dumps.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Did the doctor say you have to hold off for a while? I mean, you shouldn't need to be but so recovered to be able to kiss your wife, I'd think. Maybe he's just afraid for whatever reason. I really, really wish you a speedy/positive resolution to this.


----------



## Dromond

The epilogue to what was supposed to be "happily ever after" is making me extremely sad.


----------



## CleverBomb

Nostalgia for the old Dims Chat in its prime.


----------



## cinnamitch

My ex died yesterday. If that isn't sad enough, watching my grown daughter cry and say she wants her daddy back is killing me.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Dromond said:


> The epilogue to what was supposed to be "happily ever after" is making me extremely sad.







cinnamitch said:


> My ex died yesterday. If that isn't sad enough, watching my grown daughter cry and say she wants her daddy back is killing me.



I am so sorry.  That must be so, so hard. My condolences.


----------



## Surlysomething

Very sorry to hear this. 

Lots of hugs your (and your daughter's) way



cinnamitch said:


> My ex died yesterday. If that isn't sad enough, watching my grown daughter cry and say she wants her daddy back is killing me.


----------



## 1love_emily

Well all of the true sadness on this thread makes my gloomy mood seem unnecessary.
I'm having terrible luck on dating sites, and it's killing me. I'm on POF, OkCupid, and two other FA/BBW dating sites, and so far nothing. 
Sure, I've gone on some dates, but nothing substantial has come up for me. I just want to date a boy for a few weeks, then be his girlfriend. 

And the worst part, the absolute worst part is this:
The first DAY I was on one of the BBW/FA sites, a 19 y/o 6'2" boy from my town with a photo of him in the performance hall at my school, messaged me. Of course, I messaged back but he hasn't logged on since the day he messaged me. 
I don't know the kid and I can't say that I want him, but his profile was lovely and I'm just so disappointed that literally nothing can happen because he doesn't log on!

I feel like it wouldn't be hard for me to find someone if I wasn't a BBW. If I was normal-sized, or even a smaller BBW, it would be a lot easier.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

There are nights it is *physically* painful to be separated from the person you are engaged to for months on end.  This is one of those nights. I really, really wish immigration would hurry the hell up and decide. I want them to let me in more than anything, so I can go join him and we can start our lives in a place we're both excited about and get married - but if they choose not to let me in (PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE let me in!  ) I just want to *know* so we can get to work on our backup plan and we can be together ASAP!

View attachment window_kiss_cropped_obx.jpg


----------



## AuntHen

BigBeautifulMe said:


> There are nights it is *physically* painful to be separated from the person you are engaged to for months on end.  This is one of those nights. I really, really wish immigration would hurry the hell up and decide. I want them to let me in more than anything, so I can go join him and we can start our lives in a place we're both excited about and get married - but if they choose not to let me in (PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE let me in!  ) I just want to *know* so we can get to work on our backup plan and we can be together ASAP!
> 
> View attachment 110348



I am sorry for your pain G. I am just curious... a lot of countries allow you to marry and then apply for a spousal visa (allowing you to live and work)... in which most cases they are approved and can be expedited due to already being considered family. Are you giving up your American citizenship (in which I can see it being a more drawn out matter)? Is this not an option in Australia? 

Regardless, I hope they approve it soon 

**and just to be clear to anyone reading this, I am not talking about immigration fraud... I am talking about where one or the other goes to the foreign country, gets married, goes back home and *then *applies for the visa (not where they stay and try to get it, while living together, hoping to not have to go back home, which can be considered fraud).


----------



## balletguy

Battling this weird stomach bug for a few days. Yuck


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

fat9276 said:


> I am sorry for your pain G. I am just curious... a lot of countries allow you to marry and then apply for a spousal visa (allowing you to live and work)... in which most cases they are approved and can be expedited due to already being considered family. Are you giving up your American citizenship (in which I can see it being a more drawn out matter)? Is this not an option in Australia?
> 
> Regardless, I hope they approve it soon
> 
> **and just to be clear to anyone reading this, I am not talking about immigration fraud... I am talking about where one or the other goes to the foreign country, gets married, goes back home and *then *applies for the visa (not where they stay and try to get it, while living together, hoping to not have to go back home, which can be considered fraud).



Thanks for asking, B.  The Prospective Marriage Visa, for engaged couples, is the type we applied for. These are processed, on average, in five months, which is 1-2 months *more quickly* than spouse visas where the applicant is outside of Australia (which is the type you're talking about). Spouse visas have more intense requirements than Prospective Marriage visas (PMVs) also - with the spouse visa, we would have to marry and then spend a few months living together in order to collect adequate evidence, and even then we'd be cutting it close. With the Prospective Marriage Visa, the type we chose instead, once it's approved, you get to move to Australia, and then you have to marry within nine months. Once you've married, then you apply for the spouse visa and you get to stay in the country while it's processed. It's the same type of application for the spouse visa as people who didn't do the PMV first, but it's MUCH faster since they're basically just rubber-stamping it (they already have determined you're a genuine couple) and it's less expensive (the cost for the PMV plus the cost of the spouse visa that follows it add up to the same amount you'd pay for just a spouse visa by itself). 

I could have gotten over there on a tourist visa, married him, and applied there for a spouse visa, and then we could have waited it out together. It's allowable, but it's not fully ethical/above board either. We of course want everything to be absolutely above-board, so... we did things this way.


----------



## AuntHen

BigBeautifulMe said:


> I could have gotten over there on a tourist visa, married him, and applied there for a spouse visa, and then we could have waited it out together. It's allowable, but it's not fully ethical/above board either. We of course want everything to be absolutely above-board, so... we did things this way.



I totally understand your choice to do it that way but I differ on the ethics part. I understand immigration laws were established to protect people and the countries involved, however, I have a huge issue with the government telling me when and how I can marry. I feel they violate my rights as a human and citizen. Anyway, that's a subject for another thread and time


----------



## Tad

Fingers crossed for you on quick processing and a big thumbs up, BBM! I have a couple of friends who have married Americans, and had much the same sort of issues to sort out, and the one who went the same basic route as you did, I recall how he just felt more and more distracted as time went on--hard to just sit back and wait, when it is something so important!

Good luck, too, on finding patience and serenity in the face of such a maddening wait!


----------



## Sweetie

My Skippy collapsed with what I think was a seizure while my son was walking him last night. I'm on a fixed income and a large vet bill is something I just can't do. He's my best friend. My son volunteered to let me use the money that is left over after paying his tuition and books towards it. I'm just praying its something that some medication can fix.


----------



## Tad

Sweetie said:


> My Skippy collapsed with what I think was a seizure while my son was walking him last night. I'm on a fixed income and a large vet bill is something I just can't do. He's my best friend. My son volunteered to let me use the money that is left over after paying his tuition and books towards it. I'm just praying its something that some medication can fix.



Oh, I hope that that it is a) treatable and b) not too expensive. It is horrible being faced with those decisions about our pets


----------



## Sweetie

Tad said:


> Oh, I hope that that it is a) treatable and b) not too expensive. It is horrible being faced with those decisions about our pets



Thanks Tad. We took him today and so far it was $301. That's just for the visit and bloodwork. I did get in touch with a local organization that can sometimes help pay some of the bills but I'm not sure if they'll approve us for the help. His heart/lungs sounded good to the vet, so now they have to figure out whats going on.


----------



## TwilightStarr

I broke my middle finger today  It hurts so bad and I can't do shit with 2 of my fingers wrapped up!!


----------



## Saoirse

We will never get along 

I try so hard to make him happy and it gets me nowhere.


----------



## HeavyDuty24

That i can't talk to or see someone that i really want to.


----------



## littlefairywren

A huge batch of cicadas have been tricked out of hibernation because of abnormally warm weather heating the ground, and have ended up dying in their shells.


----------



## spiritangel

I had plans to make an awesome dinner but hit the wall and had to nap and now its either make it at eat crazy late which I dont really have the energy to do or have something else

I hate days like this


----------



## Iannathedriveress

Tom Clancy just passed away


----------



## spiritangel

Cellulitus, its only a small patch but its knocking me around so badly its been a while since I have had it be this full on.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

spiritangel said:


> Cellulitus, its only a small patch but its knocking me around so badly its been a while since I have had it be this full on.



Oh, that stuff is no joke.  Hope you're on antibiotics!


----------



## TwilightStarr

spiritangel said:


> Cellulitus, its only a small patch but its knocking me around so badly its been a while since I have had it be this full on.



Hope it goes away sooner than later! I had a friend who just landed in the hospital from a bad case of it.


----------



## Mitchapalooza

Be sure and get that taken care of. Sometimes things that seem little can really be bad ya know


----------



## Sweetie

I had an exchange with a man I used to babysit. I hadn't heard or seen from him since he was about 3. Unfortunately, it was a very unpleasant one because he chose to speak about our President in a very vulgar way. He referred to him as a "stupid ******". It breaks my heart that he could become such a racist. He was such a sweet little boy. I totally respect him not liking the President, even calling him stupid I could live with. But calling him a "******"...it totally broke my heart.


----------



## Ms Charlotte BBW

Learning how to say goodbye to someone I've shared the last 10 years of my life with...someone I have a child with...and someone who doesn't love me anymore. It hurts and it sucks. It really, really sucks.


----------



## AuntHen

Big HUGS Ms. Charlotte


----------



## spookytwigg

I was going to post that I'm feeling really lonely at the moment but it sounds like Charlotte is having a far worse time of it.

I'm sorry to hear you're having a rough time. I really hope it picks up.


----------



## Ms Charlotte BBW

fat9276 said:


> Big HUGS Ms. Charlotte



Thank you. I've been crying most of the day, so hugs certainly help!


----------



## Ms Charlotte BBW

spookytwigg said:


> I was going to post that I'm feeling really lonely at the moment but it sounds like Charlotte is having a far worse time of it.
> 
> I'm sorry to hear you're having a rough time. I really hope it picks up.



Awww sweetie, loneliness can be just as bad...hugs to you!! Hope you're feeling better soon!


----------



## Emma

Ms Charlotte BBW said:


> Learning how to say goodbye to someone I've shared the last 10 years of my life with...someone I have a child with...and someone who doesn't love me anymore. It hurts and it sucks. It really, really sucks.



Sorry to hear that


----------



## Ms Charlotte BBW

Emma said:


> Sorry to hear that



Thank you.  It's been a long time coming. He'd rather spend his time with others...if you know what I mean...rather than spend time with me and his son.


----------



## HeavyDuty24

I didn't get to have Spaghetti today, but i really wanted it.  lol


----------



## missyj1978

feeling old


----------



## bbwbud

Ms Charlotte BBW said:


> Thank you.  It's been a long time coming. He'd rather spend his time with others...if you know what I mean...rather than spend time with me and his son.



So sorry to hear, Charlotte. Some people just don't know how good they have things...You deserve better...:kiss2:


----------



## Ms Charlotte BBW

bbwbud said:


> So sorry to hear, Charlotte. Some people just don't know how good they have things...You deserve better...:kiss2:



Thank you sweetie. Big hugs!! xo


----------



## bbwbud

Ms Charlotte BBW said:


> Thank you sweetie. Big hugs!! xo



I'm gettting all warm and tingly just thinking of big hugs from you, Charlotte...


----------



## penguin

Feeling that I'll never be good enough as I am, that I will have to settle for less than I want or need.


----------



## Blackhawk2293

I wasn't actually sure whether to put this in the happy or the sad section but I have been disowned by my family because of my weight and how much they can't bear my appearance.

Now some would ask why I would want to be putting that in the happy section. In a way being disowned by them is like having an emotional weight lifted from me anyway because now I can actually work through the effects of psychological manipulation and abuse I went through as a child and actually find a way to live without having them constantly bombarding me with their needy toxic abusive shit like they have done my whole life. When I was younger, I was considered as the stupid child because I wasn't a straight A student like me sister was so that's what they used as a justification for their particular brand of abuse. Now that I have a Masters they can't do that so they moved onto my weight because over the last 15 years (since I left home) I went from weighing 132 lbs to 245 lbs.

On the other hand sad because I had hoped that as an adult I would actually be able to share my life with them without such judgments and try and reconnect with them. But unfortunately their highly narcissistic behaviours prevent them from actually being able to see what kind of damage their behaviour causes. So as much as I would like to make peace and be part of the family, I know that in order for me to be the person I want to be I have to be without them.


----------



## spiritangel

BigBeautifulMe said:


> Oh, that stuff is no joke.  Hope you're on antibiotics!




The antibiotics actually knock me around far worse, atm it is only a couple of small spots that are healing, along with all the other symptoms I get. If it gets any worse I will opt for antibiotics but after 10 years of dealing with it I find they actually make it far harder to recover and that as long as I treat the ulcers and take it easy it usually goes away in reasonable time.



TwilightStarr said:


> Hope it goes away sooner than later! I had a friend who just landed in the hospital from a bad case of it.



I hate hospital, so try to avoid it, lucky for me I have a fully stocked wound care kit and know how to use it both spots are fairly small and as I am doing the wound care stuff they are shrinking 



Mitchapalooza said:


> Be sure and get that taken care of. Sometimes things that seem little can really be bad ya know



I know but as stated above 10 years or more of dealing with this many times on my own (first time I had it 4 drs did not even diagnose it) so I have the routine down pat and know when I need the extra help and such.






penguin said:


> Feeling that I'll never be good enough as I am, that I will have to settle for less than I want or need.



I hate that feeling, and have had a lot of insecurities and stuff surface recently that I had thought I had dealt with or did not know they were there 

here is the truth *YOU ARE ENOUGH, YOU ARE AMAZING and YOU ARE WORTH IT*

sometimes it takes time, but first we have to recognise that within ourselves we already are enough, and infinately loveable

lots of hugs


----------



## Tad

Blackhawk2293 said:


> I wasn't actually sure whether to put this in the happy or the sad section but I have been disowned by my family because of my weight and how much they can't bear my appearance.



Sorry your family can't see the harm that they've been doing to themselves and you, but I completely agree with you that this will be for the best in the long run. Having that poison out of your life should really let you live your own life in a much healthier way. Best of luck!


----------



## Blackhawk2293

Tad said:


> Sorry your family can't see the harm that they've been doing to themselves and you, but I completely agree with you that this will be for the best in the long run. Having that poison out of your life should really let you live your own life in a much healthier way. Best of luck!



Thanks, I really do hope that my actions lead to a more peaceful existence for me.


----------



## Sweetie

My Skippy had another seizure tonight when I took him for a walk. It was really scary. I'm going to have to call the vet and ask for the meds for him. I was hoping his last seizure would be the only one he'd have.


----------



## moore2me

Sweetie said:


> My Skippy collapsed with what I think was a seizure while my son was walking him last night. I'm on a fixed income and a large vet bill is something I just can't do. He's my best friend. My son volunteered to let me use the money that is left over after paying his tuition and books towards it. I'm just praying its something that some medication can fix.





Sweetie said:


> Thanks Tad. We took him today and so far it was $301. That's just for the visit and bloodwork. I did get in touch with a local organization that can sometimes help pay some of the bills but I'm not sure if they'll approve us for the help. His heart/lungs sounded good to the vet, so now they have to figure out whats going on.





Sweetie said:


> My Skippy had another seizure tonight when I took him for a walk. It was really scary. I'm going to have to call the vet and ask for the meds for him. I was hoping his last seizure would be the only one he'd have.



Dear Sweetie, I am sorry about your Skippy with epilepsy. I too am the mother of an epileptic dog. The remarkable thing is my dog has been having seizures for his whole life (about 13 years) and we have been able to manage them. I'll share some of what I've learned.

*Tip #1 -* If the seizures are not too frequent, consider yourselves lucky. I was not advised to medicate my dog daily unless the seizures were more than one a day. Since my dog was only have a couple a month, I saved the meds to pre-seizure use.

Most seizures meds for dogs makes them sleepy or "loopy" and given daily all you end up with is a druggie dog. My favorite seizure med is Topamax which is a human (or child) anti-seizure medication. 50 mg works best. I use it when I can tell a seizure it coming on. There is an art to do this and it requires reading the dog's behavior. My dogs starts pacing, staring at things that may not be visible, or staring at his water bowl or getting up and laying down again and again, moving constantly. You can poke a pill down his throat at this point far enough to make him swallow it, You should not poke one down his throat when he is seizing = he will bite down on your hand and he could also choke.

*Tip #2*
You can also spot some of the triggers that cause seizures. (You won't be able to spot all of them, but you can ID many of them.) I have spotted one of Skippy's already - going for a walk. You probably need to stop taking him out of the house for walks until you find out what about the walks that is making him seize.

Things that make my dog seize are unusual things appearing at the house that he does not understand & scares him. One day I rode home in a stranger's car. When the car stopped in the yard, and I got out, pow he went into a full seizure.

We live on a flight path for the local airbase. One day we had a fly over of a B-52. It flew low. it was big and very noisy with low vibrations. When the the plane was overhead the dog was outside. Pow, he dropped to the ground and started to seize.

Sometimes he has big seizures that last 45 minutes and sometimes he has little seizures when he stops in the middle of the room and stares at nothing for 15 seconds. These are little seizures and usually requires no action.

*Tip #3-*
Here's something even more remarkable - my husband can talk the dog down from having a seizure when one starts. I cannot do this. My husband calls the dog over to his side and talks to him soothingly and pats him. My husband is calm and if the dog starts wanting to wander off he lightly holds him with a leash. We keep the dog restrained to a small area because the dog is big and the is having a big seizure the dog knocks over lot of stuff.
If the dog starts this at night and MrM2M is sleeping, I wake him up and make him come play dog Whisperer until the seizure stops.

*Tip #4*-
When the dog comes out of a seizure they are exhausted like they have run a marathon. They need a quick fix of sugar and energy in the bloodstream. I keep vanilla ice cream in the freezer for such a situation. I take about a cup of it and put it in the microwave for 20 seconds or so to melt it and give it to the dog in a dish. This really makes the dog feel better and helps him recover.

*Tip #5-*
I don't know how old your child is but you should warn him that a dog having a seizure can accidentally hurt him. I have been cut with my dog's toenails, bit by chomping jaws, etc. when a large seizure hits. Unless your kid is old enough to understand and handle the dangers you should keep him clear of the seizure. Our dog has never lost control of his bodily functions in all his seizures, but he does drool excessively. Paper towels are very necessary.

*Tip #6*-
If you or you child thinks the dog will harm you during a seizure, wear a heavy long sleeved shirt and leather gloves that fit your hands. Restrain the dog with a short (not more than 6 foot leash. Keep hold of one end of it.)If possible keep the dog calm by having him in a darkened room or hallway, cool (he will be sweating bullets), and no loud noises. Flickering lights or strobe lights have been known to trigger seizures.

Sadly, some dogs' seizures get so frequent is becomes humane to put the pup down. My brother had a dog that started seizing and was up ten or so a day. They had to let the dog go - it was humane, that was no life for a pup.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I hope you have good luck with Skippy. We have dogs that can tell people that they are going to have a seizure. We are also lucky enough to have some people who can tell when their dog is going to have a seizure. Also, as my dog has gotten to be a senior citizen he has just about stopped seizing. Alto. he probably won't live more than another year, I don't think we will have to worry with epilepsy too much.

(If it helps any 50 mg of Topamax is also prescribed to humans who have bad headaches or migranes.)


----------



## Sweetie

Thanks for all your wonderful advice. I got so scared when it happened. I noticed if Skippy gets overly excited he seems to have them. I didn't realize it at the time but there were about three other major ones before we took him to the vet, all which happened when he was upset. Tonight he saw another dog and was looking to fight him I guess. I was walking ahead of him, trying to get him away from the other dog, when I heard a weird noise. When I turned around he was on the ground not breathing. It only lasted for about 5 seconds but it felt like forever. I didn't actually see him having the seizure but surmised thats what was going on. I hate to medicate him but I'm so scared of him dying on me. I love him so much. He's the sweetest dog I've ever had. 



moore2me said:


> Dear Sweetie, I am sorry about your Skippy with epilepsy. I too am the mother of an epileptic dog. The remarkable thing is my dog has been having seizures for his whole life (about 13 years) and we have been able to manage them. I'll share some of what I've learned.
> 
> *Tip #1 -* If the seizures are not too frequent, consider yourselves lucky. I was not advised to medicate my dog daily unless the seizures were more than one a day. Since my dog was only have a couple a month, I saved the meds to pre-seizure use.
> 
> Most seizures meds for dogs makes them sleepy or "loopy" and given daily all you end up with is a druggie dog. My favorite seizure med is Topamax which is a human (or child) anti-seizure medication. 50 mg works best. I use it when I can tell a seizure it coming on. There is an art to do this and it requires reading the dog's behavior. My dogs starts pacing, staring at things that may not be visible, or staring at his water bowl or getting up and laying down again and again, moving constantly. You can poke a pill down his throat at this point far enough to make him swallow it, You should not poke one down his throat when he is seizing = he will bite down on your hand and he could also choke.
> 
> *Tip #2*
> You can also spot some of the triggers that cause seizures. (You won't be able to spot all of them, but you can ID many of them.) I have spotted one of Skippy's already - going for a walk. You probably need to stop taking him out of the house for walks until you find out what about the walks that is making him seize.
> 
> Things that make my dog seize are unusual things appearing at the house that he does not understand & scares him. One day I rode home in a stranger's car. When the car stopped in the yard, and I got out, pow he went into a full seizure.
> 
> We live on a flight path for the local airbase. One day we had a fly over of a B-52. It flew low. it was big and very noisy with low vibrations. When the the plane was overhead the dog was outside. Pow, he dropped to the ground and started to seize.
> 
> Sometimes he has big seizures that last 45 minutes and sometimes he has little seizures when he stops in the middle of the room and stares at nothing for 15 seconds. These are little seizures and usually requires no action.
> 
> *Tip #3-*
> Here's something even more remarkable - my husband can talk the dog down from having a seizure when one starts. I cannot do this. My husband calls the dog over to his side and talks to him soothingly and pats him. My husband is calm and if the dog starts wanting to wander off he lightly holds him with a leash. We keep the dog restrained to a small area because the dog is big and the is having a big seizure the dog knocks over lot of stuff.
> If the dog starts this at night and MrM2M is sleeping, I wake him up and make him come play dog Whisperer until the seizure stops.
> 
> *Tip #4*-
> When the dog comes out of a seizure they are exhausted like they have run a marathon. They need a quick fix of sugar and energy in the bloodstream. I keep vanilla ice cream in the freezer for such a situation. I take about a cup of it and put it in the microwave for 20 seconds or so to melt it and give it to the dog in a dish. This really makes the dog feel better and helps him recover.
> 
> *Tip #5-*
> I don't know how old your child is but you should warn him that a dog having a seizure can accidentally hurt him. I have been cut with my dog's toenails, bit by chomping jaws, etc. when a large seizure hits. Unless your kid is old enough to understand and handle the dangers you should keep him clear of the seizure. Our dog has never lost control of his bodily functions in all his seizures, but he does drool excessively. Paper towels are very necessary.
> 
> *Tip #6*-
> If you or you child thinks the dog will harm you during a seizure, wear a heavy long sleeved shirt and leather gloves that fit your hands. Restrain the dog with a short (not more than 6 foot leash. Keep hold of one end of it.)If possible keep the dog calm by having him in a darkened room or hallway, cool (he will be sweating bullets), and no loud noises. Flickering lights or strobe lights have been known to trigger seizures.
> 
> Sadly, some dogs' seizures get so frequent is becomes humane to put the pup down. My brother had a dog that started seizing and was up ten or so a day. They had to let the dog go - it was humane, that was no life for a pup.
> -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
> 
> I hope you have good luck with Skippy. We have dogs that can tell people that they are going to have a seizure. We are also lucky enough to have some people who can tell when their dog is going to have a seizure. Also, as my dog has gotten to be a senior citizen he has just about stopped seizing. Alto. he probably won't live more than another year, I don't think we will have to worry with epilepsy too much.
> 
> (If it helps any 50 mg of Topamax is also prescribed to humans who have bad headaches or migranes.)


----------



## moore2me

Sweetie said:


> Thanks for all your wonderful advice. I got so scared when it happened. I noticed if Skippy gets overly excited he seems to have them. I didn't realize it at the time but there were about three other major ones before we took him to the vet, all which happened when he was upset. Tonight he saw another dog and was looking to fight him I guess. I was walking ahead of him, trying to get him away from the other dog, when I heard a weird noise. When I turned around he was on the ground not breathing. It only lasted for about 5 seconds but it felt like forever. I didn't actually see him having the seizure but surmised thats what was going on. I hate to medicate him but I'm so scared of him dying on me. I love him so much. He's the sweetest dog I've ever had.



Sweetie, You mentioned Skippy seemed to want to fight when he was on his "walkies". Has Skippy been neutered? This minor surgery will take away most of his desire to fight other dogs. I neuter all my male dogs. It makes them healthier and easy to handle.


----------



## Sweetie

moore2me said:


> Sweetie, You mentioned Skippy seemed to want to fight when he was on his "walkies". Has Skippy been neutered? This minor surgery will take away most of his desire to fight other dogs. I neuter all my male dogs. It makes them healthier and easy to handle.



Yes, he's neutered. Its strange...he doesn't react to all dogs that way, just some and I really have no idea what it is that triggers him.


----------



## Lamia

In May had to put down my beloved cat Elvis. He was 19 years old. He fell off the back of the couch and injured his spine. My other cat his sister was jumping from a shelf to the sink and fell and injured her spine. She was 21 and I had to put her down. 

I think about them all the time and just wish I had maybe put them in a room with nothing to climb on. They were so old and fragile. 

I wasn't going to ever have any more animals because I didn't want to go through the process of putting them to sleep and holding them and watching them pass.

My niece's cat got out and knocked up. She had two kittens. She found a home for one of them. She was so upset about the other one that I agreed to take her. She found out the people who took her other kitten were keeping it outside. It's not even 7 weeks old yet. So she got it back from them.

I have now adopted both kittens. I am glad I actually took them both. They play and fight and then nap. They are so sweet and beautiful.

Here they are sleeping







Never be afraid to open your heart to more love.


----------



## moore2me

Lamia,

You are right - a kitten has no business living outside in today's modern society with cars whizzing by, houses close together (some kids are mean to defenseless kittens). It would be like letting a toddler live outside. 

View attachment this kid is mine.jpg


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Lamia said:


> In May had to put down my beloved cat Elvis. He was 19 years old. He fell off the back of the couch and injured his spine. My other cat his sister was jumping from a shelf to the sink and fell and injured her spine. She was 21 and I had to put her down.
> 
> I think about them all the time and just wish I had maybe put them in a room with nothing to climb on. They were so old and fragile.
> 
> I wasn't going to ever have any more animals because I didn't want to go through the process of putting them to sleep and holding them and watching them pass.
> 
> My niece's cat got out and knocked up. She had two kittens. She found a home for one of them. She was so upset about the other one that I agreed to take her. She found out the people who took her other kitten were keeping it outside. It's not even 7 weeks old yet. So she got it back from them.
> 
> I have now adopted both kittens. I am glad I actually took them both. They play and fight and then nap. They are so sweet and beautiful.
> 
> Here they are sleeping
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Never be afraid to open your heart to more love.




Awwwww. Big congrats on doing something so difficult but so worthwhile. They are adorable!


----------



## SprocketRocket

Have to make some tough decisions in the coming months.


----------



## CleverBomb

@ Lamia
Oh, squee. Squee indeed.

Those two are "adorbial". Enjoy!


moore2me said:


> Lamia,
> 
> You are right - a kitten has no business living outside in today's modern society with cars whizzing by, houses close together (some kids are mean to defenseless kittens). It would be like letting a toddler live outside.


Ferals do it well enough, I suppose -- but once you've taken one on as a pet, you don't get the option of treating it as just another feral cat.



BigBeautifulMe said:


> Awwwww. Big congrats on doing something so difficult but so worthwhile. They are adorable!


Or, what she just said there.


----------



## moore2me

Here's what is BBQing my goat (in fact it's burning now). Stoopid girl here (me) was dealing with my new mom and her erased mind coming out of surgery at the end of March & beginning of April 2013. When the IRS and state taxes were due in April, I filed for an extension. The government gave blanket extensions until . . . .

*October 15, 2013​*
. . . . to fill out the paperwork for 2012 taxes. Well, we all know what kind of love fest is going on in Washington right now. So for the past three days I have been busting my butt filling out my taxes and mom's taxes. (It doesn't help that mom can barely remember her own birthday.) 

I am sweating bullets and popping tums and ibuprofen (for headaches) for what? So I can pay my income taxes like a good little girl. At the same time our elected lawmakers are wasting this money doing (God only knows what?) but it sure isn't running the country. When I take a break and watch TV for 10 minutes or so, I just get madder and madder - then I have to go back and work on more tax stuff. I should never have grown up!!!!


----------



## HeavyDuty24

Ugh accidently broke my capo.  i have another one but that was my favorite one, going to have to order another one like it.


----------



## Saoirse

Lamia said:


> In May had to put down my beloved cat Elvis. He was 19 years old. He fell off the back of the couch and injured his spine. My other cat his sister was jumping from a shelf to the sink and fell and injured her spine. She was 21 and I had to put her down.
> 
> I think about them all the time and just wish I had maybe put them in a room with nothing to climb on. They were so old and fragile.
> 
> I wasn't going to ever have any more animals because I didn't want to go through the process of putting them to sleep and holding them and watching them pass.
> 
> My niece's cat got out and knocked up. She had two kittens. She found a home for one of them. She was so upset about the other one that I agreed to take her. She found out the people who took her other kitten were keeping it outside. It's not even 7 weeks old yet. So she got it back from them.
> 
> I have now adopted both kittens. I am glad I actually took them both. They play and fight and then nap. They are so sweet and beautiful.
> 
> Here they are sleeping
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Never be afraid to open your heart to more love.



TOO CUTE!!! Congrats on the new additions. Ive had 7 cats, 5 dogs (2 are still with me!), 5 rabbits, 3 goats, countless chickens and 1 horse... it hurt to see them all pass... it NEVER gets easy. But NOT having a pet is way harder then when you have to say goodbye. I work for a dog groomer and we've had sooooo many of our little fur-friends pass away, even though they arent our own pets and we only see them every 6-8 wks, we get to know them and love them. Actually just yesterday I had to sign 4 cards for customers who lost their pups.  But life is a circle and there is always room for more love! And its funny how these animals just come to us in our time of need...



moore2me said:


> Lamia,
> 
> You are right - a kitten has no business living outside in today's modern society with cars whizzing by, houses close together (some kids are mean to defenseless kittens). It would be like letting a toddler live outside.



Well, every cat Ive owned has been an indoor/outdoor cat. We never had a litter box in the house and the cats were able to come and go as they pleased. We lost a few to "the woods", but the cat we had to put down 2 years ago was 17. And one of them is still alive and killing. Shes a wild beast! ...who just happens to love cuddling every once in a while.


----------



## Diana_Prince245

A friend of mine was moved to hospice today. He was diagnosed with Stage 4 colon cancer about nine months ago, three months before his daughter was born. I was hoping he'd get to see her walk, but now I'm not so sure.


----------



## CAMellie

Diana_Prince245 said:


> A friend of mine was moved to hospice today. He was diagnosed with Stage 4 colon cancer about nine months ago, three months before his daughter was born. I was hoping he'd get to see her walk, but now I'm not so sure.



I lost a husband to stage 4 colo-rectal cancer so I feel your pain. My condolences.


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## Lovelyone

A friend whom I have chatted with for a very long time and trust has just told me that she heard a nasty rumor about me. It wasn't very flattering for my reputation--with which I have striven to maintain an air of dignity and use scruples when dealing with people. Apparently, I sleep around...a LOT and most recently I am supposedly sleeping with two men at the same time. I find this particularly interesting since I have not left my home (the home I share with my sister and her children) due to agoraphobia in 1 1/2 years unless to go to the doctor. I haven't dated ANYONE in over 3 years--not even dinner and a movie at home. I don't understand why people say these types of things to undermine people. What's even more interesting is that she heard this rumor from someone who I am not acquainted with in the least. I have never heard of her and I do not run in the same circles of friends that she does. I guess I should feel a bit of celebrity on this one as she has taken so much time out of her day to slander me all over with ridiculous rumors that aren't (and couldn't possibly be) true. I love that I live rent free in her head and that she's obviously too much of a nitwit to realize how truly ludicrous she sounds.


----------



## HottiMegan

I'm sad and scared to talk to the hubs about how i feel so neglected. He knows i have been really sad lately. He just sort of moves on and drowns himself in video games. I don't want to hurt his feelings and that's probably why i haven't said anything to him. I'm starting to turn to crazy thoughts about seeking outside affection. I would never do that but i don't like being THAT desperate. I feel so alone in a house full of people. I get more hugs and kisses from my son and that hurts so bad.


----------



## moore2me

HottiMegan said:


> I'm sad and scared to talk to the hubs about how i feel so neglected. He knows i have been really sad lately. He just sort of moves on and drowns himself in video games. I don't want to hurt his feelings and that's probably why i haven't said anything to him. I'm starting to turn to crazy thoughts about seeking outside affection. I would never do that but i don't like being THAT desperate. I feel so alone in a house full of people. I get more hugs and kisses from my son and that hurts so bad.



Megan, I have read your problems with hubs for a while lately and I am sorry that you are having issues. Some things I have learned in over 34 years of one marriage and 2 years of my first marriage . . . .

If you are hungry would you hesitate to tell hubs you want to eat? If you are cold or hot would you be scared to talk to hubs about adjusting the thermostat? If hubs is hogging the TV watching movie marathons of _Bonanza _and _Gunsmoke_ would you ask him to change the channel so the family could watch something else? Would you discuss these requests with him without worrying if it would hurt his feelings? Do you thing a man would get his feelings hurt by asking him nicely to change things around the house?

You and hubs need to set aside some time to be alone together and just have a little "date" like the old days. You need fan the old flames that made your relationship strong. Talk to him (alone). He should talk to you while you guys are alone. 

If hubs is having medical problems, you two need to talk his doctor  and do it together as a team. There are medications men can take nowadays to help with sex drive or to correct a great variety of physical and mental sexual issues. There is no shame in this. Hubs should understand this. Another person that can help with family counseling in this area is a therapist  your doctor or hubs employer should have a professional clinic who you guys can talk to and can treat you (with strict anonymity). As we get older, stuff starts breaking down. I can name at least a dozen things in me that dont work right anymore. Without meds I couldnt go out in public without major embarrassment. Its not something I fret about being shamed over  those ships sailed a long time ago and are not coming back.

And a little warning, if you seek affection outside your marriage, you can find it. But it will tear your family apart. You guys will probably get a divorce. That will certainly do mental harm to your boys and will affect all four of you guys standard of living. You also may lose custody of the boys (it has happened before). And even worse, they could end up living with a step mom who is not near as sweet and understanding as you are (this has happened before too). I hope you two can work thru this, most marriages have problems like you described or worse (sooner or later). If a husband and wife are wise and committed to their marriage, they can work thru these major problems that threaten your family.

I wish you and hubs the best.


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## Mathias

My dog has arthritis and it's gotten more severe than we'd initially thought. He can hardly move around at times.


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## BigBeautifulMe

Sometimes I miss him so much my heart hurts.


----------



## moore2me

My husband's mother and father are dead and his closest mother figure is his aunt - who only lives about 2 hours away and close to her daughter and grand-daughter. His aunt is 75 and has a bunch of health problems including heart valve disorders that causeher to pass out briefly (seconds) a few times a month. She is not supposed to drive but she still had a car in her garage, her neighbors are supposed to take her places if her girls cannot. (I have talked to her many times and told her to take a taxi if no one is around.)

Well, Monday afternoon, during rush hour she decided she needed to go to the grocery store and made the decision to drive herself. We don't know what happened but she crossed and intersection and another car T-boned her and just about tore one of her legs off below the knee. The big bone was cut clean in two. The smaller bone was cracked in a twisted spiral pattern. The hospital wanted to do surgery on her immediately but they decided to wait until the next morning because she was having heart problems. I was not sure if they were going to fix her leg or take it off. The doctors decided to repair her leg and she was doing okay with lots of pain meds on board. (We didn't have to worry about her driving anymore - her car was totaled.) And then today . . . . 

The doctors took her cath out and gave her a bedside toilet. Her grand-daughter was visiting along with another senior citizen when my aunt decided she needed to use the toilet. *The nurses didn't come fast enough so she decided to get out of bed herself with the help of her two visitors. Really bad move. *When her feet hit the floor, she crumpled like a rag doll. Neither one of the visitors knew what to do and could keep her from falling on her bad leg.!!!!Now we are not sure what is going to happen to her and her leg . . . .I feel so bad for her (and her grand-daughter). 

*Never try to get a patient out of bed unless you know what you are doing. Wait for the nurse or an aid. If the patient has to pee in the bed - then pee or poop in the bed. It's much, much better than tearing out your surgical repairs. I hope my aunt lives thru this thing.*


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## Allie Cat

This is kind of minor compared to some of the other ones on here, but.. someone stole my bicycle last night. So much for getting in shape any time soon :\


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## Mathias

Not only did my Dad forget to acknowledge my birthday today but apparently because I don't take time to write down each sale I make into my phone I'm not taking it seriously enough, Even despite the fact I've sold over three grand worth of stuff in the last three days alone. When he does realize what he did and what today is and tries some half assed apology I'm going to go ballistic.


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## Amaranthine

Mathias said:


> Not only did my Dad forget to acknowledge my birthday today but apparently because I don't take time to write down each sale I make into my phone I'm not taking it seriously enough, Even despite the fact I've sold over three grand worth of stuff in the last three days alone. When he does realize what he did and what today is and tries some half assed apology I'm going to go ballistic.



How inconsiderate :/ It sounds like you're doing awesomely, so don't let him being over-critical get you down. And *Happy Birthday!* I hope it takes a turn for the best!


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## Surlysomething

Happy Birthday!

Hopefully your Dad gets his head out of his ass and helps you celebrate your special day.





Mathias said:


> Not only did my Dad forget to acknowledge my birthday today but apparently because I don't take time to write down each sale I make into my phone I'm not taking it seriously enough, Even despite the fact I've sold over three grand worth of stuff in the last three days alone. When he does realize what he did and what today is and tries some half assed apology I'm going to go ballistic.


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## Tad

Happy birthday Matthias! Sorry that it is not getting the acknowledgement it deserves, but make it awesome anyway!


============================

For my sad: I seem to be coming down with a cold, heading into a weekend where my son is off on a training course most of both days, and I'd been looking forward to lots of couple time.


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## spiritangel

Happy Birthday Matty (Parents can suck somedays)

I want to cry atm, no matter which way I slice and dice my budget, after a phone call from my electricity company wanting to double my fortnightly payment which I just can not afford

it looks like the money Mum was giving me for the hotel, and such and what little I have managed to scrape aside it going to have to go to the bill or I am going to have to double my payments and just never go anywhere and cut down on essentials like healthy food 

So much for looking forward to a weekend away for the first time in 18months and all the work I have already put into my costume for the bash 

oh well cest la vie I will get over it.


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## moore2me

Mathias, You have yourself a nice birthday on your own. Don't let adults spoil your party. (Altho you may have to teach some people manners.) 

View attachment m2m taz.jpg


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## Iannathedriveress

Holden is going to stop making the Ute. I wanted one so bad. First Ford is going to stop the Falcon, now Holden stopping production of their Ute, what's going on Australia?


----------



## Sweetie

My Skippy passed away yesterday. I'm grateful that he passed peacefully in his sleep but I miss him so much. 

View attachment 0827111650.jpg


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## Tad

Sweetie said:


> My Skippy passed away yesterday. I'm grateful that he passed peacefully in his sleep but I miss him so much.



Aww, my condolences Sweetie. Losing a loved one, no matter many feet they may have, is always tough. Glad for Skippy that the passing was easy, but there is nothing easy about being the one left grieving.


----------



## Iannathedriveress

Sweetie said:


> My Skippy passed away yesterday. I'm grateful that he passed peacefully in his sleep but I miss him so much.
> 
> View attachment 111015



Im sorry to hear about your lost.


----------



## moore2me

Sweetie, I am so sorry to hear about Skippy's death. I didn't know that he was that close to the end of his years when we were talking about his seizures. This is unusual because most dogs (and people) tend to decrease the number of seizures they have as they age. One way this is over ridden is when the animal develops a tumor in the brain. However, a geriatric brain tumor can start seizures.

Nevertheless, I am sorry that you and your son lost your good friend. Tell you son that Skippy will be waiting for him on the other side of the rainbow bridge when he gets to heaven and welcome the family home.


----------



## moore2me

Sweetie, I am so sorry to hear about Skippy's death. I didn't know that he was that close to the end of his years when we were talking about his seizures. This is unusual because most dogs (and people) tend to decrease the number of seizures they have as they age. One way this is over ridden is when the animal develops a tumor in the brain. A geriatric brain tumor can start seizures.

Nevertheless, I am sorry that you and your son lost your good friend. Tell you son that Skippy will be waiting for him on the other side of the rainbow bridge when he gets to heaven and welcome the family home.


----------



## littlefairywren

Sweetie said:


> My Skippy passed away yesterday. I'm grateful that he passed peacefully in his sleep but I miss him so much.



I am so sorry about your wee Skippy, Sweetie. Soft and gentle hugs for you.


----------



## TwilightStarr

I'm having an MS relapse


----------



## moore2me

TwilightStarr said:


> I'm having an MS relapse



Bummer Twilight. If you don't mind me asking, do you think the relapse will remit? Fortunately most of my bad relapse have been restored (at least 90%) by my body - altho some of them took a couple of months. I think the longest one to be restored was my eyesight. I was so glad when my sight came back to normal.


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## Surlysomething

I'm so sorry, lady. Go easy on yourself.






TwilightStarr said:


> I'm having an MS relapse


----------



## Victoria08

My best friend e-mailed me to let me know that they had to put our cat down a few days ago  We got Sissy when I was just 5 years old and when we moved to Canada, I was told that she had to stay behind in England...so my best friend kind of adopted her.
It always sucks when a pet passes away.


----------



## spookytwigg

I'm in hyper anxiety mode at the moment and I really can't switch it off. I can hardly convince myself to leave my room but at the same time I'm feeling crushingly lonely.

Yay brain.


----------



## ODFFA

There was an attempted break in at our house about an hour ago (yes, _again_). Alarm went off, no one got in and we didn't see anyone this time, luckily. Now I'm missing someone in a way I shouldn't be. After weeks of hard work trying to keep all 'those' images out of my head......

Goddamn it, life! I've been busting my chops trying to make the most of you, but you have been impossibly facetious lately. I need a break. I just need a fucking break :'(


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## Saoirse

spookytwigg said:


> I'm in hyper anxiety mode at the moment and I really can't switch it off. I can hardly convince myself to leave my room but at the same time I'm feeling crushingly lonely.
> 
> Yay brain.



Me right now. Fuuuuuuck it sucks


----------



## ButlerGirl09

Not feeling safe in my neighborhood I was laying on my couch last night watching tv and just before 3am I heard someone screaming and shouting. When I finally made out what he was saying (Help! Help! Somebody help! Police!) I bolted to look out my window to see what was going on. 

I found out today that he had been stabbed right on my corner. Luckily, police caught the offender, but that was right in the alley where my car is parked. Things are getting rough around here.


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## moore2me

ODFFA said:


> There was an attempted break in at our house about an hour ago (yes, _again_). Alarm went off, no one got in and we didn't see anyone this time, luckily. Now I'm missing someone in a way I shouldn't be. After weeks of hard work trying to keep all 'those' images out of my head......
> 
> Goddamn it, life! I've been busting my chops trying to make the most of you, but you have been impossibly facetious lately. I need a break. I just need a fucking break :'(





ButlerGirl09 said:


> Not feeling safe in my neighborhood I was laying on my couch last night watching tv and just before 3am I heard someone screaming and shouting. When I finally made out what he was saying (Help! Help! Somebody help! Police!) I bolted to look out my window to see what was going on.
> 
> I found out today that he had been stabbed right on my corner. Luckily, police caught the offender, but that was right in the alley where my car is parked. Things are getting rough around here.



Maybe we need to start a thread on violence/robbery prevention? We had a problem with this at my mom's house this week too. I have described before that my mom (88) lost a large portion of her mind, adult training, ability to reason & age appropriate thinking when she had surgery earlier this year. We are trying to let her live at home (with a sitter) as long as we can.

Two days ago, mom's sitter decided she wanted to get the two of them a lunch from the store two blocks away and left mom for about 15 minutes to pick the food up. While she was gone, a stranger came up to mom's open door and waved at mom, asking her if he could come in? She said of course - thinking he was a family friend from the past. 

The stranger sat down in her kitchen and began asking her questions about her house, who lived there and her husband and children. Mom finally realized this guy was no friend of the family & that she had let a "predator" inside inside her house. She told him her sitter would be back any moment with her lunch. At that point the man took the hint and left her house. Mom watched him out her window walk up the street a couple of houses and get in a pickup truck that had two other men sitting in the front seat. They started the truck and left the area. 

When the sitter came back, mom told her what happened. The two of them called the police & an officer came to the house to investigate and take the info. needed. They agreed to do extra patrols in the area for a couple of days and be on the lookout for the truck with the three men in it. Everyone had turns lecturing mom. but I am pretty sure she will forget what we tell her in a week or so and we will be right back to where we started.


----------



## Fuzzy

This is going to be my first holiday season alone. I'm sure some of you have this happen all the time, welcome to the club, yadda yadda yadda. Can I just go hibernate somewhere and come out when its spring?


----------



## Shosh

This has been a really hard and sad year for me. I have not been able to imagine feeling happy again.

But I am hopeful that I will be able to smile again in 2014.

I am by nature a very happy and optimistic person.

I have much to be grateful for and many blessings, so I am, going to turn my mind to that.


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## spiritangel

That I have had one hell of a rollercoaster of a weekend and basically came home to discover I had lost friends, cant trust others I thought I could, and that there was a whole lot of drama I did not even know about going on.

Why cant people just be grown ups.


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## Aust99

Was this at the event you made the costume for? Sorry that happened.


----------



## penguin

I am having a really hard time getting moving this morning. I just want to lie in bed and let myself feel sad. I've got some uplifting music on to try to help me get going, but it's not working that well. We're going to be late to school, but today, I don't care.


----------



## Yakatori

I played a song for you. But (contained therein) there are no such spoilers for the season finale of _The Mentalist_...


----------



## penguin

I am intrigued by the negative space in peanut butter that they talked about. Thank you


----------



## Yakatori

of unstable atomic properties brought about by combination with jelly or "Fluff"


----------



## CAMellie

I'm sad because my husband has to work a bajillion hours over the next 3 days so I'm home alone for Thanksgiving.


----------



## Iannathedriveress

I'm sad that Paul Walker just passed away. I'm currently watching The Fast and Furious and I was in shocked to hear about this.


----------



## HottiMegan

I'm sad that I asked for help to get the living room/dining room/kitchen cleaned out to prepare for xmas decorating and i was the only one working. They didn't seem interested in going to get a tree.. So i'm to the point where we might not even put a tree up this year. I'm tired of being the cheerleader. They can do it themselves if they want it festive in here.


----------



## Webmaster

Apparently having lost actor Paul Walker to an accident that could have been right out of one of his movies. And, spookily, what seems like minutes after it was reported, the Wikipedia page on him was already all in past tense, every sentence.


----------



## penguin

I feel stuck at the bottom of a dark hole. It's hard to keep reminding myself it's all temporary and that things will work out.


----------



## azerty

penguin said:


> I feel stuck at the bottom of a dark hole. It's hard to keep reminding myself it's all temporary and that things will work out.



I can understand it can be hard. I wish you'll soon come out of this dark hole


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## Tracyarts

It's the first holiday season with both my parents gone, and it's hitting me a lot harder than I expected.


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## Diana_Prince245

Tracyarts said:


> It's the first holiday season with both my parents gone, and it's hitting me a lot harder than I expected.



You're not alone. Many people find the first few holidays after a loved one's death to be really difficult emotionally. Hugs, and you know people here are always willing to talk.


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## Surlysomething

Lots of thoughts your way, Tracy. The loss of a parent is so heart-wrenching during the holidays.



Tracyarts said:


> It's the first holiday season with both my parents gone, and it's hitting me a lot harder than I expected.


----------



## CAMellie

Everybody is so busy trying not to upset my mother-in-law that they're letting her get away with turning me into some super villain. I feel like a dog that's kept on a chain in the backyard until it's time to blame me for something. Nobody will stand up for me and they all go out of their way to keep me away from her so I can't stand up for myself.


----------



## spookytwigg

After already being in a shit mood today I was then left to wait in the pharmacists for 45 minutes while they lost my slip and faffed around. This made me feel STUPIDLY anxious... now my brain feels like it's been scooped out with a rusty spoon.


----------



## HottiMegan

My grandma is in the hospital with pneumonia. I live too far away to go see her. I'm scared. She's such a spunky 91 year old lady and I feel so horrible i haven't written her in months. I'm the only grand kid who writes. I'm sad and scared for her. I love my grandma so much.


----------



## TwilightStarr

My broken finger isn't healing right at all and I might have to have surgery on it, which I do not want to happen at all!!!!!   
Going to Occupational Therapy again in the morning and then off to the Ortho Doctor to see how it's healing


----------



## HDANGEL15

*JUST can't get out of depression that has been around since the season changed....I was told to get outside and walk a few times a day to get out of the office...but its so fucking grey...its not that uplifting...alot of $$ issues surrounding me....and sick & tired of being sick & TIRED of them.......*


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## Ms Charlotte BBW

Just found out (last night) that a little girl with cancer, who lives in my neighborhood, has been given days to a few weeks to live. She was doing so well until she came down with a virus a few weeks ago. If they treat the virus, the cancer will kill her. If they keep treating the cancer, the virus will kill her. And they can't treat both at the same time or it will kill her.  70% of her body is filled with cancer cells. She is only 7. My son is 8. I can't even imagine what her mother must be going through...


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## spiritangel

Aust99 said:


> Was this at the event you made the costume for? Sorry that happened.




yes and there has been more lost 'friends' since which hurts as they never spoke to me before unfriending and blocking me. However I am a great friend so when they see the true colours of these other people they will see what they threw away, I would rather have the fair weather sort ofpeople out themselves rather than continue in my life oblivious even if it hurts.



Ms Charlotte BBW said:


> Just found out (last night) that a little girl with cancer, who lives in my neighborhood, has been given days to a few weeks to live. She was doing so well until she came down with a virus a few weeks ago. If they treat the virus, the cancer will kill her. If they keep treating the cancer, the virus will kill her. And they can't treat both at the same time or it will kill her.  70% of her body is filled with cancer cells. She is only 7. My son is 8. I can't even imagine what her mother must be going through...



Hugs I am so sorry to hear this, its so hard but I do know one thing she is an Angel and they teach us so much courage and love even through such a terrible illness like cancer.




As for me other than the money worries and strees, My Mothers Partner who has spent more time in my life than my father was on life support over the weekend, he has come off it yesterday but is still bleeding internally, and his quality of life keeps dropping they as yet are unsure what they will be able to do to help him until he is more stable. For the first time ever my Mother admitted to me on the weekend she wasnt coping I can not imagine what would have happened had they not already been in Sydney for his Annual scans. It makes me sad that my Mum will spend Christmas in the Accomadation accross the road from the Hospital.


----------



## Ms Charlotte BBW

spiritangel said:


> Hugs I am so sorry to hear this, its so hard but I do know one thing she is an Angel and they teach us so much courage and love even through such a terrible illness like cancer.



Yes, you are so right! Children teach us so much more than most adults. Hugs to you too during this difficult time with your mom and her partner.


----------



## bbwbud

Prayers for everyone facing these awful challenges.


----------



## Ms Charlotte BBW

bbwbud said:


> Prayers for everyone facing these awful challenges.



Thank you Bud. ((hugs))

Anyone who wants to follow the brave little girl I mentioned above...here is a link to her facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/teamlaney7


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## TwilightStarr

So I definitely have to have surgery on my finger  

I wanted to wait until Spring to do it, I hate winter weather and I really don't want to fall and bust my ass and/or hand on ice, but the Doctor said it will be a lot worse if I wait that long. 

I am going to wait until the beginning of the year though, for when my medicaid starts and to give myself some time to prepare for the fact that they are going to cut open my finger, put a screw in it, and then I get to spend another 3-4 months with my finger bandaged up and in a splint :really sad:


----------



## CAMellie

One of my dearest friend's husband passed away last night due to liver failure. He wasn't a drinker, a drug user, or anything. He used to work tearing down buildings that had asbestos in them.
R.I.P. Matt. I'll be there for your family as much as I can.


----------



## Lovelyone

CAMellie said:


> One of my dearest friend's husband passed away last night due to liver failure. He wasn't a drinker, a drug user, or anything. He used to work tearing down buildings that had asbestos in them.
> R.I.P. Matt. I'll be there for your family as much as I can.



I'm so sorry for your loss, Mellie. (hugs)


I woke up today to the most intense depression I have ever felt. I've been crying out of the blue for no apparent reason and just someone saying something to me makes me break down. This time of year is always hard but this year has been the worst yet.


----------



## KHayes666

It's more anger than it is sad.

It sucks that so many people in failed/failing marriages and relationships get/got to live with each other while my relationship has been going strong for 4 years and we still can't live together. Someone once stole a picture of us after we got engaged, slapped it on a website and said we had "6 month tops". Well we've been together 4 years, been engaged for 2 and in that time span I've seen people I don't like go through breakups (and I'm 99.9% sure all those geeks on that website that snickered at me have never been in a meaningful relationship in their lives other than with their right hand) and divorces meanwhile she and I are still standing. It's frustrating to see people in my news feed and other places I venture that have no business living together when its the one thing that would solve most of our petty problems. I can take small solace in the fact people I don't like are miserable, but its better to make my own situation better than it already is. Hopefully soon we can have our own home and take the next step.

This is almost unrelated but whatever, I'm rolling. I hate that traffic on I-95 North starts at 2:30 PM and doesn't let up till after 7. That's how bad this state has gotten that rush hour lasts 5 hours instead of just 1. What this means is I can't see my friends or fiancée between 2:30 and 7:30 because they live so far away.


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## Ms Charlotte BBW

CAMellie said:


> One of my dearest friend's husband passed away last night due to liver failure. He wasn't a drinker, a drug user, or anything. He used to work tearing down buildings that had asbestos in them.
> R.I.P. Matt. I'll be there for your family as much as I can.



Hugs and prayers during this difficult time. 



Lovelyone said:


> I woke up today to the most intense depression I have ever felt. I've been crying out of the blue for no apparent reason and just someone saying something to me makes me break down. This time of year is always hard but this year has been the worst yet.



I'm so sorry you are feeling so lost and alone. Hugs to you my friend... xo


----------



## HottiMegan

:really sad:Grandma got her last communion today:really sad:


----------



## Piink

Realization that this may be my Mom's last Christmas. Her health is headed downhill, and some days are worse than others. We had a good time decorating the tree, still she had a hard time standing up for a short period of time and had to sit and take a break quite often as she just doesn't have the strength anymore. She fell out of bed yesterday evening, and was so weak/sore she spent most of today in bed.

If it is her last, I want this to be the best she's ever had. While inside is all decorated, and she can enjoy it daily, my big suprise will be outside tomorrow evening. We haven't decorated the outdoors since my brother passed away in 2010, so I spent the day pulling off all the old decaying lights, cleaning the flower garden, and starting to put up outside lights. Twinkling stars across the front, lighted trees and presents, and whatever else I can think of. 

My dad may also be facing yet another back surgery. He has a disk presing against his spinal cord. Don't know if he could make it through another surgery. Or if I could. While back surgery isn't as major as heart surgery, it is still risky. And he hasn't realy gotten over the quad-bypass from 2009. Two of his new veins have collapsed and he is to high-risk for another heart surgery. I almost lost him once, don't want to think about what could happen if we need to do it again.

I'm nearly 25. I shouldn't be worrying about how much my days left with my parents are dwindling.


----------



## spiritangel

Piink said:


> Realization that this may be my Mom's last Christmas. Her health is headed downhill, and some days are worse than others. We had a good time decorating the tree, still she had a hard time standing up for a short period of time and had to sit and take a break quite often as she just doesn't have the strength anymore. She fell out of bed yesterday evening, and was so weak/sore she spent most of today in bed.
> 
> If it is her last, I want this to be the best she's ever had. While inside is all decorated, and she can enjoy it daily, my big suprise will be outside tomorrow evening. We haven't decorated the outdoors since my brother passed away in 2010, so I spent the day pulling off all the old decaying lights, cleaning the flower garden, and starting to put up outside lights. Twinkling stars across the front, lighted trees and presents, and whatever else I can think of.
> 
> My dad may also be facing yet another back surgery. He has a disk presing against his spinal cord. Don't know if he could make it through another surgery. Or if I could. While back surgery isn't as major as heart surgery, it is still risky. And he hasn't realy gotten over the quad-bypass from 2009. Two of his new veins have collapsed and he is to high-risk for another heart surgery. I almost lost him once, don't want to think about what could happen if we need to do it again.
> 
> I'm nearly 25. I shouldn't be worrying about how much my days left with my parents are dwindling.




I am so sorry to hear this and can relate to it so much My Mums Partner was on lifesupport until tues and he is currently in intensive care, they need him to improve before they attempt to opperate again and find and stop the source of his internal bleeding, I am sad because My Mum and he are stuck in Hospital over the Hollidays and she wont let me catch the train up to see her. But she is already dealing with daily calls from his family and their friends she is enjoying her down time in the appartment place accross from the Hospital thank goodness it is only $40 a night and they fully stock the fridge and pantry and what not. Still it makes me sad that she is only 3hrs away and I wont get to see her for the 3rd chrissy in a row


----------



## Lovelyone

Piink said:


> Realization that this may be my Mom's last Christmas. Her health is headed downhill, and some days are worse than others. We had a good time decorating the tree, still she had a hard time standing up for a short period of time and had to sit and take a break quite often as she just doesn't have the strength anymore. She fell out of bed yesterday evening, and was so weak/sore she spent most of today in bed.
> 
> If it is her last, I want this to be the best she's ever had. While inside is all decorated, and she can enjoy it daily, my big suprise will be outside tomorrow evening. We haven't decorated the outdoors since my brother passed away in 2010, so I spent the day pulling off all the old decaying lights, cleaning the flower garden, and starting to put up outside lights. Twinkling stars across the front, lighted trees and presents, and whatever else I can think of.
> 
> My dad may also be facing yet another back surgery. He has a disk presing against his spinal cord. Don't know if he could make it through another surgery. Or if I could. While back surgery isn't as major as heart surgery, it is still risky. And he hasn't realy gotten over the quad-bypass from 2009. Two of his new veins have collapsed and he is to high-risk for another heart surgery. I almost lost him once, don't want to think about what could happen if we need to do it again.
> 
> I'm nearly 25. I shouldn't be worrying about how much my days left with my parents are dwindling.



I am so sorry that you are having to deal with this but please allow me to offer you some perspective from someone who also went through something similar. I lost one uncle on Christmas Eve and one Uncle on New Years Day only one year apart. They were both hospitalized over the Christmas and New Year Holidays. That was hard enough but during those same times my Dad was in the hospital suffering congential heart failure the first year and from a quadruple heart bypass the second. We weren't sure if he would live through it as he was an older gentleman. We did everything that we could ti cheer up his hospital room from putting up lights, a mini Christmas tree with ornaments, homemade cards and anything that would remind him of Christmas. To this day I am very thankful that we did those things at Christmas because it was his last Christmas. Those memories that we made were for him but they were also for us. All the hard work will pay off when you see the look on the face of your mother when she sees all that you have done. That priceless look will remain ingrained in your memory forever and you will be thankful to have it. (hugs)


----------



## Iannathedriveress

My grandmother broke her wrist while taking the dog to do its business. My grandparents were supposed to come down here later today, but I don't know if they are coming down south or back up north.


----------



## Iannathedriveress

ClutchingIA19 said:


> My grandmother broke her wrist while taking the dog to do its business. My grandparents were supposed to come down here later today, but I don't know if they are coming down south or back up north.



My grandmother is doing better and got a cast today. They made it down south here today for christmas time.


----------



## Piink

spiritangel said:


> I am so sorry to hear this and can relate to it so much My Mums Partner was on lifesupport until tues and he is currently in intensive care, they need him to improve before they attempt to opperate again and find and stop the source of his internal bleeding, I am sad because My Mum and he are stuck in Hospital over the Hollidays and she wont let me catch the train up to see her. But she is already dealing with daily calls from his family and their friends she is enjoying her down time in the appartment place accross from the Hospital thank goodness it is only $40 a night and they fully stock the fridge and pantry and what not. Still it makes me sad that she is only 3hrs away and I wont get to see her for the 3rd chrissy in a row



So very sorry you won't get to see your mom this year, again. Last year my mom was in the hospital, and we waited until she came home on New Years Day before we celebrated. I hope her partner gets better, and you get to see her soon!



Lovelyone said:


> I am so sorry that you are having to deal with this but please allow me to offer you some perspective from someone who also went through something similar. I lost one uncle on Christmas Eve and one Uncle on New Years Day only one year apart. They were both hospitalized over the Christmas and New Year Holidays. That was hard enough but during those same times my Dad was in the hospital suffering congential heart failure the first year and from a quadruple heart bypass the second. We weren't sure if he would live through it as he was an older gentleman. We did everything that we could ti cheer up his hospital room from putting up lights, a mini Christmas tree with ornaments, homemade cards and anything that would remind him of Christmas. To this day I am very thankful that we did those things at Christmas because it was his last Christmas. Those memories that we made were for him but they were also for us. All the hard work will pay off when you see the look on the face of your mother when she sees all that you have done. That priceless look will remain ingrained in your memory forever and you will be thankful to have it. (hugs)



Sorry for your losses. I don't look forward to the day it happens, but I know that the days left are limited. She was really happy to see what all I had done with the decoratiins and such. And we even got her to go look at lights with us. It wore her out just riding around, but we had fun.

I'm not ready to give up my parents just yet. I've still got a lot of 'lessons' to learn. Plus, I haven't given tgem any grandkids yet!


----------



## Lovelyone

My 25 year old niece passed away today due to pneumonia, leaving behind a 6 year old daughter and a 3 year old son. We are devastated. My sister is inconsolable.


----------



## cinnamitch

Lovelyone said:


> My 25 year old niece passed away today due to pneumonia, leaving behind a 6 year old daughter and a 3 year old son. We are devastated. My sister is inconsolable.



I am sorry for the loss your family has suffered. You will all be in my prayers


----------



## HottiMegan

Lovelyone said:


> My 25 year old niece passed away today due to pneumonia, leaving behind a 6 year old daughter and a 3 year old son. We are devastated. My sister is inconsolable.



I'm so sorry.


----------



## Gingembre

Lovelyone said:


> My 25 year old niece passed away today due to pneumonia, leaving behind a 6 year old daughter and a 3 year old son. We are devastated. My sister is inconsolable.



I'm so sorry for your loss. x


----------



## HottiMegan

Just found out that my grandma probably won't see the new year. I'm heartbroken. She was my favorite and last grandparent.


----------



## Surlysomething

I'm so very sorry to hear about your niece.




Lovelyone said:


> My 25 year old niece passed away today due to pneumonia, leaving behind a 6 year old daughter and a 3 year old son. We are devastated. My sister is inconsolable.


----------



## CastingPearls

As one of my best friends and her husband and son arrived at the airport in RI from Canada, to spend Christmas with her very close-knit and large family, she was met by two brothers who broke the news that their mother had suddenly died. 

At her mother's very quickly arranged wake, they were given the news that her mother's only sister died, so she lost two of the most important people in world to her in three days. 

Today another friend was hosting Christmas dinner with her family in her home and her sister died on her couch in front the the whole family including her own three small children. 

I'm deeply saddened by the losses here and there and my condolences pale in comparison to the grief all of you and them are suffering tonight. I do relate, as my own sister was born on Christmas Eve and has passed over. You never get over it. At best, you just get used to it. 

I pray for some comfort and peace for all.


----------



## azerty

I feel sad to read such bad news here, and feel useless. What to do ? Maybe pray for those persons and believe that death does not have the last word ever, specially through faith


----------



## Surlysomething

How heartbreaking. I can't even imagine...

Lots of love your way and theirs

T.





CastingPearls said:


> As one of my best friends and her husband and son arrived at the airport in RI from Canada, to spend Christmas with her very close-knit and large family, she was met by two brothers who broke the news that their mother had suddenly died.
> 
> At her mother's very quickly arranged wake, they were given the news that her mother's only sister died, so she lost two of the most important people in world to her in three days.
> 
> Today another friend was hosting Christmas dinner with her family in her home and her sister died on her couch in front the the whole family including her own three small children.
> 
> I'm deeply saddened by the losses here and there and my condolences pale in comparison to the grief all of you and them are suffering tonight. I do relate, as my own sister was born on Christmas Eve and has passed over. You never get over it. At best, you just get used to it.
> 
> I pray for some comfort and peace for all.


----------



## Ms Charlotte BBW

Lovelyone said:


> My 25 year old niece passed away today due to pneumonia, leaving behind a 6 year old daughter and a 3 year old son. We are devastated. My sister is inconsolable.



I am so sorry for your loss! Many hugs and prayers being sent to you and your family during this difficult time, my friend. xo


----------



## Lovelyone

cinnamitch said:


> I am sorry for the loss your family has suffered. You will all be in my prayers





HottiMegan said:


> I'm so sorry.





Gingembre said:


> I'm so sorry for your loss. x





Surlysomething said:


> I'm so very sorry to hear about your niece.





azerty said:


> I feel sad to read such bad news here, and feel useless. What to do ? Maybe pray for those persons and believe that death does not have the last word ever, specially through faith





Ms Charlotte BBW said:


> I am so sorry for your loss! Many hugs and prayers being sent to you and your family during this difficult time, my friend. xo



The one thing I am absolutely sure of is that here at Dimensions we have the most loving, kind and thoughtful people on the planet. Thank you all so very much for the kind words and prayers. I cannot express what that means to myself and my family at this time.


----------



## Lovelyone

CastingPearls said:


> As one of my best friends and her husband and son arrived at the airport in RI from Canada, to spend Christmas with her very close-knit and large family, she was met by two brothers who broke the news that their mother had suddenly died.
> 
> At her mother's very quickly arranged wake, they were given the news that her mother's only sister died, so she lost two of the most important people in world to her in three days.
> 
> Today another friend was hosting Christmas dinner with her family in her home and her sister died on her couch in front the the whole family including her own three small children.
> 
> I'm deeply saddened by the losses here and there and my condolences pale in comparison to the grief all of you and them are suffering tonight. I do relate, as my own sister was born on Christmas Eve and has passed over. You never get over it. At best, you just get used to it.
> 
> I pray for some comfort and peace for all.



Lainie, 

I am truly sorry for the losses that your friends have all had to endure over this holiday. I can totally relate to what they are going through because as you know already, my family has also suffered a loss.

I know that the holiday must be a bit difficult for you, also. Having a sister who was born on Christmas eve, but passed on far too young and before her time truly allows you to relate to all that everyone is feeling on this the longest week of our lives. Your sister truly is blessed to have someone who memorializes her and shows her such loving affection as you do.



Megan, I am sorry to hear about your Grandma. My prayers go out to you and your family.


----------



## Tracyarts

I found out today that my appeal was denied and I don't get to keep the house I inherited. I knew it was a long shot, but it's still a disappointment. So, Monday I have to talk to the executor of the will and find out what happens next. 

I'm just done with it. I want nothing more than to go back for one last walk through and then leave the key under the doormat and walk away from it for good. 

But at some point in the not too distant future, I have to go help finish clearing it out. Maybe I'll find something interesting in the attic?

Tracy


----------



## HottiMegan

:really sad:Grandma died:really sad::goodbye:


----------



## CleverBomb

I know words on a screen aren't much consolation, but you have my utmost condolences.


----------



## CastingPearls

HottiMegan said:


> :really sad:Grandma died:really sad::goodbye:


I'm so very sorry. My condolences to you and your family.


----------



## Surlysomething

I'm very sorry, Megan. 



HottiMegan said:


> :really sad:Grandma died:really sad::goodbye:


----------



## Lovelyone

HottiMegan said:


> :really sad:Grandma died:really sad::goodbye:



I am so sorry for your family. Prayers are being said for all of you, Megan.(hugs)


----------



## azerty

HottiMegan said:


> :really sad:Grandma died:really sad::goodbye:



Hope and prayer for you


----------



## HottiMegan

Thank you all. I'm going to snuggle up in one of the quilts she made me and remember her tonight.


----------



## Lovelyone

Everything is making me sad today. I thought I was all cried out, but apparently I am not.


----------



## missyj1978

When someone cant take the time to talk to me even if its just a quick hello. And this is why I am not and will not be in a relationship with this person. I deserve better then that and I know it. The sad part is that I thought this person was one of my best friends


----------



## KHayes666

missyj1978 said:


> When someone cant take the time to talk to me even if its just a quick hello. And this is why I am not and will not be in a relationship with this person. I deserve better then that and I know it. The sad part is that I thought this person was one of my best friends



That's what I dealt with on a day to day basis for most of 2012. The best thing you can do is to cut them out, either by not talking to them (which they probably won't notice) or to confront them and say "Hey what gives?" If their answers are insufficient or they continue to ignore you, say goodbye and find some new friends that WON'T ignore you.


----------



## missyj1978

KHayes666 said:


> That's what I dealt with on a day to day basis for most of 2012. The best thing you can do is to cut them out, either by not talking to them (which they probably won't notice) or to confront them and say "Hey what gives?" If their answers are insufficient or they continue to ignore you, say goodbye and find some new friends that WON'T ignore you.



O the worst part is that I had feeling for this person and he said he had them for me as well. And I had this gut feeling that something was up and found this personal ad in Plenty Of Fish, he is actively seeking a relationship. I knew something was up when he didn't talk to me today. Pretty sure he had a date tonight  I told him I wasn't ready for a relationship yet and he told me he would wait for me, what a joke of a man and a liar to boot. And now I know the truth about him its time to move on, and move on I will.


----------



## KHayes666

missyj1978 said:


> O the worst part is that I had feeling for this person and he said he had them for me as well. And I had this gut feeling that something was up and found this personal ad in Plenty Of Fish, he is actively seeking a relationship. I knew something was up when he didn't talk to me today. Pretty sure he had a date tonight  I told him I wasn't ready for a relationship yet and he told me he would wait for me, what a joke of a man and a liar to boot.



I could have told you from personal experience that men don't wait for anything unless they truly feel something special. Sorry you got screwed like that.


----------



## missyj1978

KHayes666 said:


> I could have told you from personal experience that men don't wait for anything unless they truly feel something special. Sorry you got screwed like that.



Oh well his loss, im a good woman and I know it and deserve better!!


----------



## lushluv

Men who are unable to be honest, even when you pour your heart out to them and lay yourself bare.


----------



## KHayes666

Its 9 am and I've been unable to sleep since 4 (my fiancée had to go somewhere with her family at 4 am). I have to work from 6 pm to 2 am. I'll be up almost 24 hours by the time I get home...ughhhhhh


----------



## Diana_Prince245

My youngest cat is having surgery for an obstructed urethra right now. I maxed out my credit cards to pay for his surgery. I don't know how I'll pay for the follow-up care after they transfer him over to my vet in the morning.


----------



## CastingPearls

Diana_Prince245 said:


> My youngest cat is having surgery for an obstructed urethra right now. I maxed out my credit cards to pay for his surgery. I don't know how I'll pay for the follow-up care after they transfer him over to my vet in the morning.


If you have a good relationship with your vet, is there any way you can talk to someone about payments? Even if they have a no-paying-off policy, they'll often make exceptions on a case by case basis. It won't hurt you to ask. I had to do it for a cat with bladder stones/obstructed urethra as well, and they worked with me. Give it a shot. Good luck!


----------



## Diana_Prince245

CastingPearls said:


> If you have a good relationship with your vet, is there any way you can talk to someone about payments? Even if they have a no-paying-off policy, they'll often make exceptions on a case by case basis. It won't hurt you to ask. I had to do it for a cat with bladder stones/obstructed urethra as well, and they worked with me. Give it a shot. Good luck!



My bio dad called them and gave them his credit card. Sometimes it helps to have a vet in the family, and be the only child who has never called and begged for money.


----------



## CastingPearls

Diana_Prince245 said:


> My bio dad called them and gave them his credit card. Sometimes it helps to have a vet in the family, and be the only child who has never called and begged for money.


Great news!


----------



## Diana_Prince245

CastingPearls said:


> Great news!



I was ecstatic. Course this means I won't be able to fly down and visit him this summer because I'll be paying him back, but my baby's going to be better.


----------



## PunkyGurly74

I went to visit my best friend, who is also my roommate, in the hospital tonight (he is in a psychiatric hospital) ...and he had long cuts on his arms..they have taken away his silverware ( he was doing it to stay focused he said )..he is just so lost and disoriented. He begins to speak and then stops and can't really look at me when he talks. He is improved in some ways since I had to have him admitted, however, in other ways - still not improving. They are changing his meds - here's to hoping it gets better soon ...I miss him terribly.


----------



## HottiMegan

Missing my grandma tonight after talking with a cousin of mine.


----------



## penguin

I'm feeling down about my birthday. My daughter has been excitedly counting down to it every morning when we get up, constantly asking me if I'm excited. I tell her I am, but I'm not. I'll be going to dinner with her and a friend on Monday, but I'm not doing anything else for it this year. I can't afford it, and I'm just not in the mood for it. Being alone for my birthday is hard, but it's not as bad as being involved with someone and having them dismiss it, which has happened before. The whole turning 37, single, without any other kids thing is bothering me, though I'm trying not to let it.


----------



## HDANGEL15

*Just when I thought it couldn't get ANY WORSE- the bottom fell out at work today.....yesterday I was put on probation for 90 days....and today my computer had a virus of the worst kind that caused them to shut down the office and send EVERYONE home...and I am the only computer that has it......FEAR IS RUNNING my life right now.

I was already in overtime seeking a new job for the 10th time in the last 5 years...as we all know how much nicer / easier it is...with A JOB....then without.....GOD HELP ME...........*


----------



## TwilightStarr

HottiMegan said:


> :really sad:Grandma died:really sad::goodbye:



I'm sorry, you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.


----------



## Surlysomething

Why did they put you on probation?


Hang in there, lady..you're tenacious as hell...things WILL get better.





HDANGEL15 said:


> *Just when I thought it couldn't get ANY WORSE- the bottom fell out at work today.....yesterday I was put on probation for 90 days....and today my computer had a virus of the worst kind that caused them to shut down the office and send EVERYONE home...and I am the only computer that has it......FEAR IS RUNNING my life right now.
> 
> I was already in overtime seeking a new job for the 10th time in the last 5 years...as we all know how much nicer / easier it is...with A JOB....then without.....GOD HELP ME...........*


----------



## KHayes666

I was scrolling through facebook and someone had shared a pic of this little baby kitten with the caption "Let's go to bed, this day sucks and I want a new one." 

I completely broke down in tears because its been nearly a year since I had to put down my 14 year old cat and I miss her every day. Very rarely did she actually sleep at my feet but seeing that shared picture made me miss those times when she did.


----------



## Mitchapalooza

I was extremely sad over my old cat because I think she just walked off an died alone has anyone else's cat or dog done this?


----------



## Saoirse

I had a dog (wolf/husky) who was eaten by coyotes. We like to say he ran off to join the pack, cause they were howling and he was answering and the next morning he was gone... but im pretty sure they ate him.

thats life!


----------



## lille

Mitchapalooza said:


> I was extremely sad over my old cat because I think she just walked off an died alone has anyone else's cat or dog done this?




That's a pretty common thing for cats to do. Sorry for your loss.


----------



## CastingPearls

I had to ban a member of a group I admin because she was so disruptive and attacking basically everyone. The sad thing is she needed the support and community but didn't listen to any of her many warnings. She became even more disrespectful. I think that some people need more help than we could give them and I really hope she finds it somewhere else. I don't regret it; it was the right thing to do, but it's still sad.


----------



## HDANGEL15

Surlysomething said:


> Why did they put you on probation?
> 
> 
> Hang in there, lady..you're tenacious as hell...things WILL get better.


*
I filed one out of 100's of law suits one day out of stature, and went to my boss the minute I realized it..

now all is well...we are back in HONEYMOON PHASE, this job is just like an abusive relationship......but it can get to hell in 30 seconds...so the job search CONTINUES!*


----------



## TwilightStarr

I'm sad but not sorry about the fact that I can't be as happy as everybody wants me to be about the new baby my sister had a few days ago. 
I know it's only a matter of time before my mom has custody of her too and everybody including my mom is all gaga over the new baby, so it's left my nephew feeling completely abandoned. The other night when I was getting him ready for bed, he made me promise I wouldn't leave him :really sad:


----------



## HottiMegan

TwilightStarr said:


> I'm sad but not sorry about the fact that I can't be as happy as everybody wants me to be about the new baby my sister had a few days ago.
> I know it's only a matter of time before my mom has custody of her too and everybody including my mom is all gaga over the new baby, so it's left my nephew feeling completely abandoned. The other night when I was getting him ready for bed, he made me promise I wouldn't leave him :really sad:



aww poor kiddo. I want to give him a hug and i don't even know him. You're a wonderful aunt.


----------



## TwilightStarr

HottiMegan said:


> aww poor kiddo. I want to give him a hug and i don't even know him. You're a wonderful aunt.



I promise I don't care what it comes down to, I will not turn my back on him, NO MATTER WHAT!!!

Thanks  I'm just trying to be the best I can be for him.


----------



## RabbitScorpion

It seems easy to forget that all day, and all night, thousands of brave people all over the world are standing ready to protect our homes, families, and us from one of our oldest enemies - fire.

Yesterday afternoon, an older building with small apartments over a party store caught fire. An "ordinary" fire, until something went tragically wrong.

Two gave their lives for the people of Toledo. One of them left a 3-year-old daughter and 1-month-old son:really sad:


----------



## Extinctor100

CastingPearls said:


> I had to ban a member of a group I admin because she was so disruptive and attacking basically everyone.



Similar sadness for me on a personal level. Had a forum friend I'd been talking to online for two weeks and she friend requested me on Facebook. I accepted yesterday, and I logged in today to see her engaged in vicious argument with friends and family members. She apparently took one of their comments on a status of mine personally and after a very long evening, she is now blocked on Facebook and the other ways we were communicating. Ugh.  Makes me want to hide from the Internet.


----------



## FatAndProud

Extinctor100 said:


> Similar sadness for me on a personal level. Had a forum friend I'd been talking to online for two weeks and she friend requested me on Facebook. I accepted yesterday, and I logged in today to see her engaged in vicious argument with friends and family members. She apparently took one of their comments on a status of mine personally and after a very long evening, she is now blocked on Facebook and the other ways we were communicating. Ugh.  Makes me want to hide from the Internet.



Don't hide  I've yet to see you completely shirtless!


----------



## Extinctor100

FatAndProud said:


> Don't hide  I've yet to see you completely shirtless!



Somewhere else besides in your dreams?  lol


----------



## FatAndProud

Extinctor100 said:


> Somewhere else besides in your dreams?  lol



Yes, please. :blush:


----------



## firefly

I had to put my one dog asleep in November. Today my other one followed and now they are reunited.

I have no idea how to carry on atm...


----------



## lille

firefly said:


> I had to put my one dog asleep in November. Today my other one followed and now they are reunited.
> 
> I have no idea how to carry on atm...



I'm so sorry that you have lost a beloved friend. Losing a pet is never easy.


----------



## thatpumpkin

Valentine's Day.


----------



## Tad

firefly said:


> I had to put my one dog asleep in November. Today my other one followed and now they are reunited.
> 
> I have no idea how to carry on atm...



So sorry for your double loss, Firefly. Grief for pets always seems doubly hard to me, because they were one of things that helped get you through grief normally, so you miss them all the more.


----------



## missyj1978

A friend of mine and his father passed away in a horrible car accident  My 5 year old son lost his best buddy and missed school today cause he was so upset about it  . R.I.P. My friend


----------



## Ms Charlotte BBW

missyj1978 said:


> A friend of mine and his father passed away in a horrible car accident  My 5 year old son lost his best buddy and missed school today cause he was so upset about it  . R.I.P. My friend



So sorry for your (and your son's) loss.


----------



## PunkyGurly74

missyj1978 said:


> A friend of mine and his father passed away in a horrible car accident  My 5 year old son lost his best buddy and missed school today cause he was so upset about it  . R.I.P. My friend



I'm so sorry missy.


----------



## TwilightStarr

We have court Wednesday morning about my mom getting temporary custody of my 2 week old niece, since one of the drug test they did on my sister at the hospital came back positive


----------



## missyj1978

Ms Charlotte BBW said:


> So sorry for your (and your son's) loss.





PunkyGurly74 said:


> I'm so sorry missy.



Thank you so much.


----------



## TwilightStarr

missyj1978 said:


> A friend of mine and his father passed away in a horrible car accident  My 5 year old son lost his best buddy and missed school today cause he was so upset about it  . R.I.P. My friend



So sorry


----------



## Tad

So sorry for the loss of your friend, Missy.


----------



## Mathias

My adaptive driving lessons keep getting delayed and rescheduled. Last time it was because of the weather. Now my instructor says the next lesson had to be cancelled because of personal reasons. I won't get another chance until March.


----------



## littlefairywren

Fracture of family and of friendships


----------



## spookytwigg

Had to go clothes shopping today. I honestly hate few things more, feel like shit now.


----------



## NewfieGal

I am working night shift and will not get home in the morning due to a winter storm  don't sleep as good of I'm not in my own bed


----------



## Mitchapalooza

NewfieGal said:


> I am working night shift and will not get home in the morning due to a winter storm  don't sleep as good of I'm not in my own bed



Ya got that right! I hate not sleeping in my own bed.


----------



## Rojodi

25 years ago, a young lady passed away, having spent her entire life with Spina Bifida and cerebal palsy. She couldn't communite with her parents and younger sisters, but she did smile when she heard their voices.

She was my landlord's oldest, and when I moved in over them, I was introduced to her. She smiled instantly, something her mother said never happens. From then on, when I'd come into their apartment, she'd light up. 

Her name was Mandy.
Stupid Barry Manilow came on Pandora


----------



## Ms Charlotte BBW

Rojodi said:


> 25 years ago, a young lady passed away, having spent her entire life with Spina Bifida and cerebal palsy. She couldn't communite with her parents and younger sisters, but she did smile when she heard their voices.
> 
> She was my landlord's oldest, and when I moved in over them, I was introduced to her. She smiled instantly, something her mother said never happens. From then on, when I'd come into their apartment, she'd light up.
> 
> Her name was Mandy.
> Stupid Barry Manilow came on Pandora



Awwwww...who knew you were the sentimental type?! (That's a good thing) :happy:


----------



## Victoria08

I was told today that my grandmother passed away last week. I was deprived the opportunity of ever knowing her because of my father's lies. He told us that his parents died in a car crash 30 years ago and it wasn't until I started researching my family history that the truth finally came out - there was no car crash. I still don't know exactly what happened, but my father just left Canada one night and he never spoke to his parents or his brother again. So I never got to know either of my grandparents, and they never knew about me. Hell, they never knew my father was alive and well for all these years - they both died believing that he was 'missing'. I'm angry and I'm sad...I'm grieving for a family member that I never knew. It's just a lot to deal with.


----------



## Gingembre

Victoria08 said:


> I was told today that my grandmother passed away last week. I was deprived the opportunity of ever knowing her because of my father's lies. He told us that his parents died in a car crash 30 years ago and it wasn't until I started researching my family history that the truth finally came out - there was no car crash. I still don't know exactly what happened, but my father just left Canada one night and he never spoke to his parents or his brother again. So I never got to know either of my grandparents, and they never knew about me. Hell, they never knew my father was alive and well for all these years - they both died believing that he was 'missing'. I'm angry and I'm sad...I'm grieving for a family member that I never knew. It's just a lot to deal with.



That is a lot to deal with. ((hugs))


----------



## Tad

Wow, Victoria, sorry that the drama of past generations has dumped such a load on to you


----------



## Victoria08

Gingembre said:


> That is a lot to deal with. ((hugs))





Tad said:


> Wow, Victoria, sorry that the drama of past generations has dumped such a load on to you



Thank you guys.


----------



## KHayes666

I didn't know how good a writer I was until 2009-10. I wish I had known in 2003-04, would have saved me so many years of nothing.


----------



## dharmabean

Without playing the "victim" role or vying to be soothed..

Group therapy tonight was an incredible struggle. A lot of cathartic, real, things were made prevalent to me and my choices. I am now in the processing point of the night and I am finding myself very saddened.


----------



## Sweetie

False people and promises broken.


----------



## littlefairywren

Wee Mouse is not right at all. She's unsteady on her feet, losing her appetite and I can't get to the vet until tomorrow morning. It's stressful not knowing what's wrong with her and having to wait till I can see someone


----------



## AuntHen

^ BIG HUGS K!!!!!!!!!! I am rooting for Mouse! :wubu:


----------



## CastingPearls

littlefairywren said:


> Wee Mouse is not right at all. She's unsteady on her feet, losing her appetite and I can't get to the vet until tomorrow morning. It's stressful not knowing what's wrong with her and having to wait till I can see someone


Praying for wee Mouse (both of us).

Love you both.


----------



## Missamanda

I literally have no friends and its my fault because I'd rather isolate myself than be an anxiety ridden mess


----------



## x0emnem0x

Cancelled plans with some people to hang out with my close friend that I don't get to hang out with often and they cancelled last minute. We were gonna drink and I spent $30 on alcohol so we could just chill and relax all night and then after I had asked him way earlier today to make sure it was okay if he was able to hang out, he cancels last minute saying he can't come. I seriously find it hard to believe I'm so important to people when they can't even keep plans.


----------



## Saoirse

So

ugh

I know he's a jerk with depression issues and he always takes his frustrations out on me, but 80% of the time we get along great and have fun and I love hanging with him. I was totally in love with him. COMPLETELY IN LOVE. I would have done absolutely anything for him. He said we will never be together like that, so I accepted it. Recently met an amazing guy who has been treating me so fucking amazingly and we have plans to spend tonight together at his house 

He knows Im seeing this new guy. I see jealousy in his eyes. He pretends he doesn't care, but he does. He doesn't want me, but he doesn't want me to be with anyone else. He hasn't said it outright, but his actions are very telling.

Obviously, I want to spend more time with the new guy. I work a bunch of jobs and my free time is limited, so spending more time with new guy means spending less time with old guy. 

Haven't seen old guy in a week. I know he's going through some shit (AGAIN) and he's in a panicky, depressed state of mind. He's begging me to go see him after work tonight. He sounds pretty suicidal (AGAIN!!!!) and my very first thought is its just him being weird, like usual. His suicide threats come on a weekly basis and they don't scare me as much anymore.

But what if tonight is the real deal? What if he finally snaps? 

I want to spend tonight with awesome new guy. He's absolutely worth my time. The more we talk and hang out, the closer and more comfortable we get and its be such a great experience, after all the asshats I wasted time on.

But old guy will always mean something to me. He's put me through a lot, but the good times we had together will always be with me. I don't know what I would do if he blew a fuse and offed himself. I would be totally devastated.

I guess Im sad that I feel helpless. Im sad that I have to tell him No and just leave it at that. He sounds scared and alone and I have felt that, I know what its like. But I cant let him control my life. And I guess Im kinda angry that he's putting all this weight on me, making me feel terrible and I will be thinking about him all night when I should be focusing on awesome new guy.

w.t.f.


----------



## Gingembre

That is tough, Saoirse. An outright "no" sounds wise but, it's easier said than done. If not, could you maybe set a compromise, like, you'll pop round and see him for an hour or so if he wants to talk his shit through, but only an hour because you already have plans? Then you can see him ok, but you need to stick to it and actually leave after an hour/30 mins/whatever time you set?


----------



## LeoGibson

Saoirse said:


> So
> 
> ugh
> 
> I know he's a jerk with depression issues and he always takes his frustrations out on me, but 80% of the time we get along great and have fun and I love hanging with him. I was totally in love with him. COMPLETELY IN LOVE. I would have done absolutely anything for him. He said we will never be together like that, so I accepted it. Recently met an amazing guy who has been treating me so fucking amazingly and we have plans to spend tonight together at his house
> 
> He knows Im seeing this new guy. I see jealousy in his eyes. He pretends he doesn't care, but he does. He doesn't want me, but he doesn't want me to be with anyone else. He hasn't said it outright, but his actions are very telling.
> 
> Obviously, I want to spend more time with the new guy. I work a bunch of jobs and my free time is limited, so spending more time with new guy means spending less time with old guy.
> 
> Haven't seen old guy in a week. I know he's going through some shit (AGAIN) and he's in a panicky, depressed state of mind. He's begging me to go see him after work tonight. He sounds pretty suicidal (AGAIN!!!!) and my very first thought is its just him being weird, like usual. His suicide threats come on a weekly basis and they don't scare me as much anymore.
> 
> But what if tonight is the real deal? What if he finally snaps?
> 
> I want to spend tonight with awesome new guy. He's absolutely worth my time. The more we talk and hang out, the closer and more comfortable we get and its be such a great experience, after all the asshats I wasted time on.
> 
> But old guy will always mean something to me. He's put me through a lot, but the good times we had together will always be with me. I don't know what I would do if he blew a fuse and offed himself. I would be totally devastated.
> 
> I guess Im sad that I feel helpless. Im sad that I have to tell him No and just leave it at that. He sounds scared and alone and I have felt that, I know what its like. But I cant let him control my life. And I guess Im kinda angry that he's putting all this weight on me, making me feel terrible and I will be thinking about him all night when I should be focusing on awesome new guy.
> 
> w.t.f.



I don't know you or him IRL, so take it FWIW, but as an outsider's view on this from the numerous posts you have made about the situation. He strikes me as a whiny, manipulative narcissist. He uses things like that to manipulate you and others into doing his bidding because he doesn't know or want to know how to stand up and be a man and take ownership of the things he does.

I have a couple in my family that are that way. Odds are highly unlikely that they'll ever go through with offing themselves because quite frankly, that type of person is too much in love with their own self to ever harm themselves. They love themselves quite well, it's the people around them that they don't give a shit about other than for what they can do for them.

Break off contact for a while, don't answer texts or calls and they will more likely go on to the next sucker that will let them in their life.


----------



## littlefairywren

It looks like wee Mouse has had a small stroke. The vet thinks a blood clot caused her wonky behaviour and there's a fear it could happen again. She's had a battery of tests (some still in the works), but her first lot of bloods came back clear. She's just a cat to some, but she could do with good thoughts, prayers and happy vibes right now. If it happens again she may be in a lot of pain, become paralysed....or I may lose her. I'm not ready for that


----------



## Rowan

It seems like nearly everything keeps going wrong in both my life and in the life of my mom. It's getting really hard to find anything positive in existence anymore. I am so scared that my mom will do something to hurt herself because suicidal thoughts do run in our family...I worry about this every day lately. I pray all the time that things will get better, but it just seems like they never do and they only continue to get worse and I feel like I myself don't know how much more I can take


----------



## x0emnem0x

9 am class. I have a quiz. Most of which I haven't studied for and the material I don't really know because I've been missing a lot of class lately. And behind on homework. Dropped one class cause I couldn't find the time to keep up and draw like it demanded. Just... this semester is getting worse and worse, and I'm just truly disappointed in myself.


----------



## KHayes666

I have to go to work and it sucks because I want to stay home and review Wrestling's Country Boys......that's pretty sad.


----------



## Ms Charlotte BBW

I lost a dear friend to suicide. I'm not quite sure how to deal with it. All I know is that my heart if broken.


----------



## PunkyGurly74

Ms Charlotte BBW said:


> I lost a dear friend to suicide. I'm not quite sure how to deal with it. All I know is that my heart if broken.



I'm so sorry for your loss.


----------



## FatAndProud

Ms Charlotte BBW said:


> I lost a dear friend to suicide. I'm not quite sure how to deal with it. All I know is that my heart if broken.



The best way to get through this tough time is to spend it with those closest to this person. 

My brother committed suicide a year ago. Every day I miss him and go through what-if's. Grieving is one thing (a step-by-step process), but when a loved one was in such pain before they left? That's what hurts me most, personally. I've learned a lot about depression and suicide. Suicide is a modern psychological concern, in my opinion...but that's for another thread. All I can say is be here for those in need.


----------



## x0emnem0x

Was the first day since my back injury that I was gonna try to go out and have lunch with my family but I forgot my sisters boyfriend has been using my car and now he isn't answering his phone, so I'm just stuck here another day doing nothing.


----------



## Rojodi

Ms Charlotte BBW said:


> I lost a dear friend to suicide. I'm not quite sure how to deal with it. All I know is that my heart if broken.



I am sorry for your loss. Everyone grieves differently. You know how best to deal with this.


----------



## Ms Charlotte BBW

PunkyGurly74 said:


> I'm so sorry for your loss.



Thank you 



FatAndProud said:


> The best way to get through this tough time is to spend it with those closest to this person.
> 
> My brother committed suicide a year ago. Every day I miss him and go through what-if's. Grieving is one thing (a step-by-step process), but when a loved one was in such pain before they left? That's what hurts me most, personally. I've learned a lot about depression and suicide. Suicide is a modern psychological concern, in my opinion...but that's for another thread. All I can say is be here for those in need.



Thank you. I am trying to be strong for her family and friends. The sad part is I always knew in the back of my mind this day would come. I just hoped I wouldn't be around to see it. 



Rojodi said:


> I am sorry for your loss. Everyone grieves differently. You know how best to deal with this.



Thank you dear friend.


----------



## Ms Charlotte BBW

Just found out on Facebook that my dad died. This week really sucks. First my friend, now my dad.


----------



## ScreamingChicken

Ms Charlotte BBW said:


> Just found out on Facebook that my dad died. This week really sucks. First my friend, now my dad.



Through Facebook? I am floored....

I am so sorry to hear this, Charlotte.


----------



## Tad

My condolences, Charlotte. So Sorry that you have so much to absorb at once.


----------



## Ms Charlotte BBW

ScreamingChicken said:


> Through Facebook? I am floored....
> 
> I am so sorry to hear this, Charlotte.



Thank you. My dad and I weren't on speaking terms since Christmas. Very sad indeed. Unfortunately I have a very dysfunctional family. 



Tad said:


> My condolences, Charlotte. So Sorry that you have so much to absorb at once.



Thank you Tad, that means a lot.


----------



## Rojodi

Ms Charlotte BBW said:


> Just found out on Facebook that my dad died. This week really sucks. First my friend, now my dad.



I am so sorry


----------



## x0emnem0x

Ms Charlotte BBW said:


> Just found out on Facebook that my dad died. This week really sucks. First my friend, now my dad.



I'm so sorry. My condolences.  *hugs*


----------



## Ms Charlotte BBW

Rojodi said:


> I am so sorry



Thank you dear friend. 



x0emnem0x said:


> I'm so sorry. My condolences.  *hugs*



Thank you. I need all the hugs I can get. I'm having a very difficult day.


----------



## x0emnem0x

Ms Charlotte BBW said:


> Thank you dear friend.
> 
> 
> 
> Thank you. I need all the hugs I can get. I'm having a very difficult day.



On that note, you have been repped a very big hug!


----------



## Iannathedriveress

Ms Charlotte BBW said:


> Just found out on Facebook that my dad died. This week really sucks. First my friend, now my dad.



I'm sorry to hear about your lost.


----------



## Ms Charlotte BBW

x0emnem0x said:


> On that note, you have been repped a very big hug!



Thank you! Hugs to you too!



ClutchingIA19 said:


> I'm sorry to hear about your lost.



Thank you


----------



## JonesT

My wife and I have seperated. She is currently 7 months pregnant with our only child. Things got rough about 4 months ago when she lost her job in which we ended up moving in with her parents until we could get back on our feet. Well she has been controlling and condescending since we have been together. It got worse once we moved in with her parents. (Of course) She tells me what I can and cannot eat, what I can and cannot buy, who I can and cannot talk to etc.. I am a very picky eater. She never cooks, it was always me that did the cooking but I would cook what she wanted and then cook what I wanted. Well she gave me the option of either changing my eating habit or ending our marriage. That sickened me. I could understand if i was a drug dealer or something but to end our marriage over that? I never ask for much but all I asked for was a little appreciation. I work my butt off to provide yet I'm not allowed to make decisions on my own. God forbid if I ever do it to her. We got into a big fight and she basically told me there's the door. She even went on to say that I can't be in the delivery room when our daughter comes. That killed me. Shes not even here yet and she is already my world. I do love my wife but I'm not too sure if our marriage will last. I apologize, I will get off of my soapbox.


----------



## Yakatori

JonesT said:


> "_...I do love my wife but I'm not too sure if our marriage will last._"


Try not to worry so much about the long-term, at least for as long as this is in transition. Because your wife, for now, is in a state of heightened hormonal response.

This does not mean, per se, that she doesn't really mean to say or do as she is. But, maybe, a better way to think about all of it is in this context of her feeling very vulnerable. Needing to find some sense of control over the once solid ground which, it seems, is shifting very rapidly beneath her feet.

You can help to assuage this by reassuring her, being there for her, doing things for her, etc...to whatever extent that you feel you can. Even as much as it sounds like she's not so appreciative, every little thing you do makes some difference. Particularly at this critical juncture. 

If it helps to move-out, maybe move back-in with your folks just for a bit, that's not at all as bad as doing so without (at some point sooner than later) explaining that ending it like that is not what you want. It might even help to take some of the pressure-off for as long as it takes for you guys to work things out.

Otherwise, divorce is very costly, and you will have plenty of time after the baby is born to better reflect on that. 

For now, the best you can do for your daughter is to keep as positive an attitude as you can and support your wife emotionally as much as you're able. That doesn't necessarily mean capitulating over what you can or can't eat or how you will move forward on that type of stuff; but, instead, trying as best as you can to redirect the focus towards where (now) it needs to be: That you love both her and your (plural) child. 

And, also, try to keep in mind that it will always be 100% in your own hands as to what kind of father you'll ultimately prove to be; in as much as it's not really about the circumstances or other things which are sometimes & in some degree beyond your direct or immediate control, but-instead how you rise or fall to the occasion, how you choose to respond to those circumstances.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

I am so sorry, Ms. Charlotte. What an awful week for you.  *hugs*


----------



## TwilightStarr

Ms Charlotte BBW said:


> Just found out on Facebook that my dad died. This week really sucks. First my friend, now my dad.



I am so sorry for your loss  Sending thoughts and prayers your way.


----------



## Ms Charlotte BBW

BigBeautifulMe said:


> I am so sorry, Ms. Charlotte. What an awful week for you.  *hugs*





TwilightStarr said:


> I am so sorry for your loss  Sending thoughts and prayers your way.



Thank you both so much. Everyone's thoughtfulness is helping me through all this.


----------



## x0emnem0x

Trying to get the family together for a family/birthday lunch and my sister and her boyfriend (birthday boy) are asleep, and my sister in law is MIA after having talked to me a half hour ago and no one is answering.  Dafuq.


----------



## Mathias

Ms Charlotte BBW said:


> Just found out on Facebook that my dad died. This week really sucks. First my friend, now my dad.



I'm so sorry. My condolences. (((Hugs)))


----------



## Ms Charlotte BBW

Mathias said:


> I'm so sorry. My condolences. (((Hugs)))



Thank you for the condolences and hugs.


----------



## FatAndProud

I feel like love is conditional with a man that labels himself an FA


----------



## Fuzzy

FatAndProud said:


> The best way to get through this tough time is to spend it with those closest to this person.
> 
> My brother committed suicide a year ago. Every day I miss him and go through what-if's. Grieving is one thing (a step-by-step process), but when a loved one was in such pain before they left? That's what hurts me most, personally. I've learned a lot about depression and suicide. Suicide is a modern psychological concern, in my opinion...but that's for another thread. All I can say is be here for those in need.



 I also struggle with this.


----------



## Ms Charlotte BBW

Fuzzy said:


> I also struggle with this.



(((Hugs)))


----------



## Amaranthine

FatAndProud said:


> I feel like love is conditional with a man that labels himself an FA



I feel like there's been a few threads on this in the FA/FFA section; it's just one of those tricky topics. If the actual _love_ is conditional, I want to say that it's a problem with your partner/the relationship itself. But...when it comes to FAism...there is a chance of [sexual] attraction being conditional. And that sounds awful. Maybe it is. But I imagine a fair number of FAs have had plenty of grief over the other side of the situation. That being said, I'm sorry that someone seems to have made you feel that way :/


----------



## FatAndProud

Amaranthine said:


> I feel like there's been a few threads on this in the FA/FFA section; it's just one of those tricky topics. If the actual _love_ is conditional, I want to say that it's a problem with your partner/the relationship itself. But...when it comes to FAism...there is a chance of [sexual] attraction being conditional. And that sounds awful. Maybe it is. But I imagine a fair number of FAs have had plenty of grief over the other side of the situation. That being said, I'm sorry that someone seems to have made you feel that way :/



I do understand that sexual attraction is sexual attraction. I just find it so tiring that it's okay for a man to be physically demanding on his partner. Meanwhile, I loved his body, face, etc regardless of how fat or thin or whatever the case may be. Stay fat! is no different than stay thin!


----------



## Tad

FatAndProud said:


> Stay fat! is no different than stay thin!



Exactly.

Sorry you've had to deal with that. I dislike that so many guys are so demanding around body size and the like. Sure preferences are preferences, but try to manage that yourself, guys, don't throw the responsibility onto your partner.


----------



## FatAndProud

If I loved someone that means everything and their choices (provided they're legal lol). But I enjoy weight training and going to the gym. It relieves stress and is my zen place


----------



## Yakatori

Amaranthine said:


> "_If the actual love is conditional, I want to say..._"


Meh..."unconditional-love" is what first comes to mind in characterizing a healthy relationship between a parent and child. Or a pet and its master. For people who haven't known each other quite that long, I dunno if _unconditional_ is the best description for how that type of love typically first begins to develop....


----------



## Amaranthine

Yakatori said:


> Meh..."unconditional-love" is what first comes to mind in characterizing a healthy relationship between a parent and child. Or a pet and its master. For people who haven't known each other quite that long, I dunno if _unconditional_ is the best description for how that type of love typically first begins to develop....



I dunno - I think it depends on how love is being applied versus suitability as a partner. And how long the period of "first beginning to develop" lasts. If you get to know someone well enough/become accustomed to having them in your life...even if you realize that a romantic partnership isn't feasible, I don't think that necessarily eliminates your love for them. Not that it still has romantic or sexual elements - just that, if it's there, that companionate sentiment can remain? 




FatAndProud said:


> If I loved someone that means everything and their choices (provided they're legal lol). But I enjoy weight training and going to the gym. It relieves stress and is my zen place



As in...displeasure even geared towards your working out? Anything like that seems (read: is) way too controlling/neurotic. I wasn't really trying to defend any behavior like that - merely pointing out the potential opposite side of respecting your partner's desires to do what they want with their body (be it lose or gain weight, anything like that,) and feeling like a failure of a partner if you can't get your body to comply like before.


----------



## Yakatori

True partnerships, either romantic or platonic, are based on shared visions & mutual expectations. If your partner somehow undergoes some sudden, drastic, and not so predictable change (e.g. brainwashed through introduction into a New Age cult); then, in a certain sense, they're not really the same person that they once were and that's not what either of you signed on for at the outset. Even if you wanted to remain with them, at that point, the original partnership has, in effect, dissolved or evolved into something entirely different. Mostly for how what you once held in common is now gone.

Obviously, any relationship changes however much over the course of time. But when it's so much & so quickly, that-by itself kind of calls into question the sustainability of it. It's normal to want to resist this, the inherent impermanence of things. To continue to have a kind of sentimentality directed towards the husk of what once was.

But not, like, when just-first starting out. When you've only been going out a short while. Then, stuff should be highly-conditional. Or whatever you'd call the total opposite of _unconditional_. 

If two people meet and, very shortly there-after, have some real-serious differences; the odds are they will ultimately just grow further and further apart. And are mostly wasting their time, outside of it being "_a teachable moment_." Or just sex. Unless, of course, you're Katherine Heigl. Or if it's a Judd Apatow movie.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

When you find real love with an FA, Katie, it won't be like that. If he really loves you, your health is more important and the sliding scale of size attraction becomes much more... slidey. I know, very eloquent. lol. But I think you know what I mean? You know A. is a dyed-in-the-wool FA, but he fully supports me being healthier and is doing everything he can to help me however I want him to. Guys like him are out there.


----------



## AuntHen

^ I agree with and know first hand what BigBeautifulMe is saying. 


I believe that when someone truly loves you and decides that they want a life with you and only you, they become/are a *YOU *admirer. This is what you need. This is what it sounds like you want. When you love someone, their happiness becomes greater than your own and if they love you, *this *should be reciprocated. It makes for a beautiful, amazing relationship.


----------



## FatAndProud

BigBeautifulMe said:


> When you find real love with an FA, Katie, it won't be like that. If he really loves you, your health is more important and the sliding scale of size attraction becomes much more... slidey. I know, very eloquent. lol. But I think you know what I mean? You know A. is a dyed-in-the-wool FA, but he fully supports me being healthier and is doing everything he can to help me however I want him to. Guys like him are out there.



And that's why I want you guys to turn your story into a bedtime story because it's so magical :wubu:


----------



## FatAndProud

Yakatori said:


> True partnerships, either romantic or platonic, are based on shared visions & mutual expectations. If your partner somehow undergoes some sudden, drastic, and not so predictable change (e.g. brainwashed through introduction into a New Age cult); then, in a certain sense, they're not really the same person that they once were and that's not what either of you signed on for at the outset. Even if you wanted to remain with them, at that point, the original partnership has, in effect, dissolved or evolved into something entirely different. Mostly for how what you once held in common is now gone.
> 
> Obviously, any relationship changes however much over the course of time. But when it's so much & so quickly, that-by itself kind of calls into question the sustainability of it. It's normal to want to resist this, the inherent impermanence of things. To continue to have a kind of sentimentality directed towards the husk of what once was.
> 
> But not, like, when just-first starting out. When you've only been going out a short while. Then, stuff should be highly-conditional. Or whatever you'd call the total opposite of _unconditional_.
> 
> If two people meet and, very shortly there-after, have some real-serious differences; the odds are they will ultimately just grow further and further apart. And are mostly wasting their time, outside of it being "_a teachable moment_." Or just sex. Unless, of course, you're Katherine Heigl. Or if it's a Judd Apatow movie.



Look, I think of myself as a fathlete. I love working out. He knew it. He asked me to stop. I sillily did....to my detriment. I'm so much happier working out. When I lose weight, I get excited...but then I eat whatever the hell I want, too....but I don't eat junk food...more homemade sweets. I love carbs lol but they're great for endurance training


----------



## FatAndProud

Grown woman on my shoulders
View attachment 113308


----------



## FatAndProud

I'm sad because sometimes I feel like pushing Yakatori into Lake Michigan


----------



## LeoGibson

FatAndProud said:


> Look, I think of myself as a fathlete. I love working out. He knew it. He asked me to stop. I sillily did....to my detriment. I'm so much happier working out. When I lose weight, I get excited...but then I eat whatever the hell I want, too....but I don't eat junk food...more homemade sweets. I love carbs lol but they're great for endurance training



I wouldn't be surprised if you tracked like I do on health checkups. I'm fat but in pretty good shape otherwise, because I hate junk food. I may eat too much, and too many carbs, but they are not overly processed junk.


----------



## Fuzzy

Isn't Lake Michigan frozen over?

My zen place is usually under a car. fixing/repairing a car, that is.


----------



## FatAndProud

LeoGibson said:


> I wouldn't be surprised if you tracked like I do on health checkups. I'm fat but in pretty good shape otherwise, because I hate junk food. I may eat too much, and too many carbs, but they are not overly processed junk.



You are a sexy motherfucker and I would ride the hell out of you. 

But back on topic, yes. Fat people can be strong and healthy. It's just we enjoy eating more. whateverrrr.


----------



## FatAndProud

Fuzzy said:


> Isn't Lake Michigan frozen over?
> 
> My zen place is usually under a car. fixing/repairing a car, that is.



Lake Michigan is frozen, I don't want to kill him. Just make him sad.

That's hot that you can fix cars *le sigh*


----------



## LeoGibson

FatAndProud said:


> You are a sexy motherfucker and I would ride the hell out of you.
> 
> But back on topic, yes. Fat people can be strong and healthy. It's just we enjoy eating more. whateverrrr.



:blush::blush:

Like one of those li'l horsies in front of the grocery store that you have to put a quarter in?


----------



## FatAndProud

LeoGibson said:


> :blush::blush:
> 
> Like one of those li'l horsies in front of the grocery store that you have to put a quarter in?



No, like Atreyu riding Falcor from Neverending Story. You're cute and fuzzy. Plus, I don't want to have to pay for my ride. Hell no. Majestically ride into the cosmos and shit.


----------



## Yakatori

I wasn't saying that it was you who "changed." My point was more directed at what *Amaranthine* said about how love-itself or even sentiment could remain _unconditional _even as certain other factors (material, physical, etc..) inevitably changed. To the effect of how it really behooves either person, at least in the beginning, to be more regularly & consistently re-evaluating things. And be comfortably-aware of just how open-ended & ambiguous it all is. (Because that's necessarily how it is). And in lieu of either person making whatever personal compromises. 

And so, really, there's no reason for anyone to be sad. Because therein contains the solution to the problem:



FatAndProud said:


> "_He *asked* me to stop._"


Which means you could just say "no."


----------



## WVMountainrear

Yakatori said:


> And so, really, there's no reason for anyone to be sad. Because therein contains the solution to the problem:
> 
> Which means you could just say "no."



Oh my goodness...she did say no...she's made that pretty clear. But, simply stated, she really liked the guy, and it's a fucking bummer that he would ask her to stop doing something she's always enjoyed and felt good about for the sole benefit of his desire to see her get larger (because it clearly sounds like she's always exercised but eats what she wants and is still fat, so it's not like she's going to suddenly start to "waste away" to nothing). She's totally allowed to be sad about him not being interested in her as deeply as she'd hoped he'd be. It's easy for people to say "it is what it is," but what it is sucks sometimes, and there's no shame in feeling or acknowledging that.

In other words, Yakatori, just let it go.


----------



## snuggletiger

Just sad that I can't ever "get it right" when it comes to relationships.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

lovelylady78 said:


> Oh my goodness...she did say no...she's made that pretty clear. But, simply stated, she really liked the guy, and it's a fucking bummer that he would ask her to stop doing something she's always enjoyed and felt good about for the sole benefit of his desire to see her get larger (because it clearly sounds like she's always exercised but eats what she wants and is still fat, so it's not like she's going to suddenly start to "waste away" to nothing). She's totally allowed to be sad about him not being interested in her as deeply as she'd hoped he'd be. It's easy for people to say "it is what it is," but what it is sucks sometimes, and there's no shame in feeling or acknowledging that.
> 
> In other words, Yakatori, just let it go.


SO well said. Rep coming your way.

EDIT: Or not. Since I apparently don't spread the love around enough.  Someone get her for me?


----------



## CleverBomb

BigBeautifulMe said:


> SO well said. Rep coming your way.
> 
> EDIT: Or not. Since I apparently don't spread the love around enough.  Someone get her for me?


Done. Now someone needs to rep her again for me too, 'cause I would have anyhow.


----------



## Ms Charlotte BBW

What makes me sad is being so close to someone that your share your entire world with them, only to have them slowly back away because you're getting too close and they've found someone else to take your place. It just proves to me never to trust someone so completely again, and most importantly, not to give away my heart or friendship to someone who truly has no desire to appreciate it.


----------



## x0emnem0x

Ms Charlotte BBW said:


> What makes me sad is being so close to someone that your share your entire world with them, only to have them slowly back away because you're getting too close and they've found someone else to take your place. It just proves to me never to trust someone so completely again, and most importantly, not to give away my heart or friendship to someone who truly has no desire to appreciate it.



I empathize 110%. *hugs* People can just be so cruel. Has happened to me numerous times. Guess that's what I get for being too nice, it seems to come off as a little clingy. You are amazing! Things will get better.


----------



## Ms Charlotte BBW

x0emnem0x said:


> I empathize 110%. *hugs* People can just be so cruel. Has happened to me numerous times. Guess that's what I get for being too nice, it seems to come off as a little clingy. You are amazing! Things will get better.



Thanks! Believe me when I say I'm hardly clingy...it's just when I care about someone and their friendship...I take it seriously. Unfortunately some people don't.


----------



## Gingembre

Just found out our cat's getting put to sleep on Monday, if she doesn't die over the weekend anyway. She's been ill for a while so it's been coming, but it's still upsetting. She lives at my parents' house so I won't get to see her again. 


NB...if anyone's on my facebook, please don't mention it. My sister doesn't know yet.


----------



## snuggletiger

Just feel sad that since the phone accident 2 weeks ago, things seem choppy with my friend, and even though I apologized and sent flowers, its still awkward.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Gingembre said:


> Just found out our cat's getting put to sleep on Monday, if she doesn't die over the weekend anyway. She's been ill for a while so it's been coming, but it's still upsetting. She lives at my parents' house so I won't get to see her again.
> 
> 
> NB...if anyone's on my facebook, please don't mention it. My sister doesn't know yet.



I'm so sorry.    Big hugs.


----------



## x0emnem0x

Gingembre said:


> Just found out our cat's getting put to sleep on Monday, if she doesn't die over the weekend anyway. She's been ill for a while so it's been coming, but it's still upsetting. She lives at my parents' house so I won't get to see her again.
> 
> 
> NB...if anyone's on my facebook, please don't mention it. My sister doesn't know yet.



I'm so sorry. :really sad: I know how that feels. I hope you feel better and your sister as well soon, it sucks. 



snuggletiger said:


> Just feel sad that since the phone accident 2 weeks ago, things seem choppy with my friend, and even though I apologized and sent flowers, its still awkward.



Sounds not fun, at all. Hope stuff un-weirds itself soon!


----------



## CastingPearls

Today is the third anniversary of my youngest brother's death.


----------



## AuntHen

CastingPearls said:


> Today is the third anniversary of my youngest brother's death.




HUGZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ  I feel ya. <3


----------



## furious styles

my life is a joke. i'm not good enough at the things i'm passionate about to turn them into a career. i suppose i just don't have the required level of ambition and drive it takes to succeed at anything these days. 

my depression is so frustrating to live with. all i really do is put a strain on the people around me and i don't want to anymore. i'm trying to justify staying alive, which is truly frightening to me because there are many things about life that i love. it's just that now they're losing out to the other parts.


----------



## s13

not really sad but disappointed..meant to be at rolling stones tonight but they postponed it coz of sir mick's partner suicide..I feel sad for mick of course and her family..RIP..I had front row seats..thats life


----------



## largenlovely

I was with my family last night and I said something and my dad responded to it with "my kids have done that plenty of times" and he caught himself. I said I guess I'm not one of your kids huh? he wouldn't answer me. 

it was hard growing up knowing my parents hated me for some unknown reason...and it is still hard as an adult sometimes  that one stung but mostly because he said it so quickly that It was obvious that it was how he really felt.

I'm really glad I'm moving back to Atlanta in a couple weeks.


----------



## Surlysomething

As much as you don't want to feel shitty about things like that as an adult, they can still cut you to the core. I'm sorry it happened because I know all too well what it feels like. My Dad can make me feel like garbage about 95% of the time, so i've finally just walked away from it. I hope you find some peace with your move.






largenlovely said:


> I was with my family last night and I said something and my dad responded to it with "my kids have done that plenty of times" and he caught himself. I said I guess I'm not one of your kids huh? he wouldn't answer me.
> 
> it was hard growing up knowing my parents hated me for some unknown reason...and it is still hard as an adult sometimes  that one stung but mostly because he said it so quickly that It was obvious that it was how he really felt.
> 
> I'm really glad I'm moving back to Atlanta in a couple weeks.


----------



## snuggletiger

Having to be at work when my throat is so sore that it hurts to swallow or even just talk. And I have to do interviews.


----------



## PunkyGurly74

I'm so sorry you even had to experience that conversation. 

For me it was similar. Both my parents are deceased and I have had time to reflect and I realized they both had so many issues - I could have been perfect, thin, the best student..etc and it would not have mattered. There was still this sense that I somehow ruined my mother's life and I was a burden to my father. It was their issues - nothing I did or didn't do created the problems in their lives. 

So, just saying I do understand and I'm very sorry that anyone has to experience that treatment from family - let alone parents.

Sometimes the best course is to protect yourself and keep boundaries. I hope your move to Atlanta is smooth and works out for you. 





largenlovely said:


> I was with my family last night and I said something and my dad responded to it with "my kids have done that plenty of times" and he caught himself. I said I guess I'm not one of your kids huh? he wouldn't answer me.
> 
> it was hard growing up knowing my parents hated me for some unknown reason...and it is still hard as an adult sometimes  that one stung but mostly because he said it so quickly that It was obvious that it was how he really felt.
> 
> I'm really glad I'm moving back to Atlanta in a couple weeks.


----------



## largenlovely

thanks y'all...growing up in that type of environment has led me to feel that there's something really wrong with me and that I'm just not a person worthy of love a lot of times. because if your parents don't love you, then there must be something wrong with you. I've been trying to overcome it but it is difficult. especially when something like this happens. it brings it all back. at least I don't cry over it anymore I suppose. I stopped crying over it years ago.

I will be glad to put some miles and distance between us when I go. thanks again y'all 




Surlysomething said:


> As much as you don't want to feel shitty about things like that as an adult, they can still cut you to the core. I'm sorry it happened because I know all too well what it feels like. My Dad can make me feel like garbage about 95% of the time, so i've finally just walked away from it. I hope you find some peace with your move.





PunkyGurly74 said:


> I'm so sorry you even had to experience that conversation.
> 
> For me it was similar. Both my parents are deceased and I have had time to reflect and I realized they both had so many issues - I could have been perfect, thin, the best student..etc and it would not have mattered. There was still this sense that I somehow ruined my mother's life and I was a burden to my father. It was their issues - nothing I did or didn't do created the problems in their lives.
> 
> So, just saying I do understand and I'm very sorry that anyone has to experience that treatment from family - let alone parents.
> 
> Sometimes the best course is to protect yourself and keep boundaries. I hope your move to Atlanta is smooth and works out for you.


----------



## cinnamitch

Sometimes you just have to realize that no matter what you do, you can't make it work. My kids went through this with their father, and finally gave up on trying to win his love. You just remember, it's your dad who loses, not you.




largenlovely said:


> thanks y'all...growing up in that type of environment has led me to feel that there's something really wrong with me and that I'm just not a person worthy of love a lot of times. because if your parents don't love you, then there must be something wrong with you. I've been trying to overcome it but it is difficult. especially when something like this happens. it brings it all back. at least I don't cry over it anymore I suppose. I stopped crying over it years ago.
> 
> I will be glad to put some miles and distance between us when I go. thanks again y'all


----------



## largenlovely

it's my mother too..so it's both of them. Me and my sister discuss how we have just horrible parents and stuff so I know it's them and she even can't believe how badly they treat me sometimes. So I realize it's their issues and not mine but It's difficult to come to terms with when something like this comes up and reminds me. it sucks but I've learned there's nothing I can really do about it. thanks though..it's nice to know that I'm not the only person trying to cope with something like this. 



cinnamitch said:


> Sometimes you just have to realize that no matter what you do, you can't make it work. My kids went through this with their father, and finally gave up on trying to win his love. You just remember, it's your dad who loses, not you.


----------



## x0emnem0x

Letting things get to me that I told myself wouldn't matter, that I knew I was getting myself into but still feeling... feelings. I wish I didn't...


----------



## Gingembre

furious styles said:


> my life is a joke. i'm not good enough at the things i'm passionate about to turn them into a career. i suppose i just don't have the required level of ambition and drive it takes to succeed at anything these days.
> 
> my depression is so frustrating to live with. all i really do is put a strain on the people around me and i don't want to anymore. i'm trying to justify staying alive, which is truly frightening to me because there are many things about life that i love. it's just that now they're losing out to the other parts.



I don't know what to say to make you feel better, or have any good advice, but I just wanted to acknowledge your post. If it's any consolation, I don't really know you, but I still think it's very worthwhile you being alive and I don't think your life is a joke. Concentrate on those things that you love and I hope you feel brighter soon. ((hug))


----------



## x0emnem0x

Just had to go next door and help my elderly neighbor off the floor. She stubbed her toe and fell and broke a bone in her back awhile back, so she's been in a place where they were helping her. She finally got back home today, but her husband is old too so he can't do much. They're both big so it's hard for them to do things and she has lost 60 pounds and isn't doing too great, but it just makes me sad. Known this lady my whole life, she watched me grow up. My other neighbor lady that knew me my whole life passed away last year, makes me sad that this one may be on the same path. I hope not.


----------



## PunkyGurly74

So, the doggies had an adventure this morning. Carla slipped her collar via some heroic efforts and she found her way through the fence and ran around due to seeing a squirrel and losing her mind! We threw Trip in the van and drove around to get Carla - running through all sorts of things....Trip decided to join and ran off when I opened the door to try to lure Carla in - I cannot trust the little buggers as far as I can throw them! So, they make it home and I go to leave and I noticed Carla's tail is down (it is always up and happy and confident) and I'm like "yeah..bad doggie" and left for work.

My roommate picks me up from work tonight and said her tail was down all day and then I get home and she is not greeting me with the same level of enthusiasm (I always think she looks like one of those women in the front row of a Beatles concert when they first came to America - you know the ones with their arms raised, yelling and screaming - throwing their head from side to side?)..and I realize with horror she has broken/damaged/dislocated her tail.

So...what are the odds the vet will take monopoly money?? sigh


----------



## Librarygirl

Being at work while recovering from a head injury. I just keep crying at small things. A friend / colleague randomly left me to do a talk to a group of 32 teenagers yesterday, by the end of which I had severe head pain and dizziness. He rushed off for a tea break without even noticing how hard I had found it and how embarrassed is been as he was supposed to do the talk and I hadn't been able to prepare as I still can't read for long periods. Now I've told him how it made me feel and he pretended it was all a big misunderstanding (I have the emails which show it wasn't). I was starting to cry and he just made a blasé comment and walked away. Now I find out he might have issues as his mother is ill and can't work out how to handle things. I just hate that feeling that people are not who u thought they were or that they don't feel able to share their problems yet are quite happy to take them out on you. Feeling ill like this means I have no perspective and everything, personally and professionally feels like it has changed while I was off sick.


----------



## Mathias

My Mom's cancer has gotten worse and the reality is she may only have months or maybe even weeks to live.


----------



## HottiMegan

Mathias said:


> My Mom's cancer has gotten worse and the reality is she may only have months or maybe even weeks to live.



 I'm so sorry.


----------



## dharmabean

Mathias said:


> My Mom's cancer has gotten worse and the reality is she may only have months or maybe even weeks to live.



 You are in my thoughts, Mathias. :: hugs ::


----------



## x0emnem0x

A good friend of mine has had a bad liver disease for awhile, and needs a liver transplant, and now the doctors are worried about her blood work, so she's headed up to be admitted to a hospital in Chicago. I'm worried and hoping she will be okay, so if anyone can keep her in your thoughts/prayers that would be welcome. I'm sure she will be okay.


----------



## Saoirse

Sounds trivial next to people having serious health issues, but Im sad that I can never look how I picture it in my mind. And it happens all the time.

I get invited to fun outings and events and I spend days planning my outfit, my hair, my makeup. I want to look beautiful. I want to turn heads. I want to get some attention.

Then the day comes and my outfit looks stupid, my hair wont behave and my makeup looks clownish. My self esteem plummets, I hate myself and I end up cancelling.

I dont want to look completely different. I like myself. I like how I look. I like my body. I like my hair. Its just that the real me and the me in my brain are similar but not quite exact. I HATE IT.

Also- my best friends sister started chemo for stage 4 ovarian cancer.


----------



## TwilightStarr

Mathias said:


> My Mom's cancer has gotten worse and the reality is she may only have months or maybe even weeks to live.



I am so sorry  Thought and prayers with you and your family.


----------



## penguin

My daughter has been sick on and off for a few weeks, and after numerous trips to the doctor and to the ER, it looks like it's reflux. When it's been bad, she feels like she's dying and can't breathe. We've trialed OTC antacids, but have moved up to a prescription medicine. She's had her second dose of that tonight, but she's still had a lot of pain and has been freaking out about it. I'm so tired  Once she's asleep, she's fine, it's just the getting there that's hard. I can't do anything else for her right now, and I know that she's not dying and that she can breathe. We were at the hospital until midnight last night and I'm exhausted now. I've also been struggling with depression, which hasn't been helped by lack of sleep, and I'm falling behind with my uni stuff. I know I need to email my tutors to let them know what's going on, but it's so hard for me to even log into the site, let alone do anything else.

I'm hoping this new medicine will start to work soon, so that we can go back to some semblance of a normal life. I'm so tired and overwhelmed.


----------



## AuntHen

^ Wow penguin! That is a lot on your plate and I hope the medication helps her immensely. It's GERD yes? I know that can be scary for those who wake up from choking on the acid and I imagine a little girl having the acid come up in her throat and mouth period, is frightening and painful! I also hope your depression eases and you can get some rest. *HUGS*


----------



## penguin

fat9276 said:


> ^ Wow penguin! That is a lot on your plate and I hope the medication helps her immensely. It's GERD yes? I know that can be scary for those who wake up from choking on the acid and I imagine a little girl having the acid come up in her throat and mouth period, is frightening and painful! I also hope your depression eases and you can get some rest. *HUGS*



It hasn't been diagnosed as GERD yet, but it does have a lot of the symptoms for it. We're having a referral sent through to the ped unit at the hospital, and they'll be able to do more than my gp or the ER can. It took hours for her pain to settle down tonight, and then we lay in bed talking until she said her eyes were heavy and we both went to sleep. That was around 10:30, and insomnia has me awake at 2. She wanted to know what happens if your heart stops, because she's worried about hers. She had an ECG on the first ER visit and it was fine, but I guess all the chest pain is making her anxious. I try to reassure her that it's the acid that's hurting, but she's only a dew weeks off being 7. It's a lot to try to rationalise her way through. 

It's school holidays now, so I'm hoping we can both have a break and get the rest we need. Thank you.


----------



## tonynyc

Mathias said:


> My Mom's cancer has gotten worse and the reality is she may only have months or maybe even weeks to live.



Mathias: Thought and prayers with you and family


----------



## tonynyc

penguin said:


> It hasn't been diagnosed as GERD yet, but it does have a lot of the symptoms for it. We're having a referral sent through to the ped unit at the hospital, and they'll be able to do more than my gp or the ER can. It took hours for her pain to settle down tonight, and then we lay in bed talking until she said her eyes were heavy and we both went to sleep. That was around 10:30, and insomnia has me awake at 2. She wanted to know what happens if your heart stops, because she's worried about hers. She had an ECG on the first ER visit and it was fine, but I guess all the chest pain is making her anxious. I try to reassure her that it's the acid that's hurting, but she's only a dew weeks off being 7. It's a lot to try to rationalise her way through.
> 
> It's school holidays now, so I'm hoping we can both have a break and get the rest we need. Thank you.



Peguin: Hope that you and your daughter are having better days.


----------



## x0emnem0x

penguin said:


> It hasn't been diagnosed as GERD yet, but it does have a lot of the symptoms for it. We're having a referral sent through to the ped unit at the hospital, and they'll be able to do more than my gp or the ER can. It took hours for her pain to settle down tonight, and then we lay in bed talking until she said her eyes were heavy and we both went to sleep. That was around 10:30, and insomnia has me awake at 2. She wanted to know what happens if your heart stops, because she's worried about hers. She had an ECG on the first ER visit and it was fine, but I guess all the chest pain is making her anxious. I try to reassure her that it's the acid that's hurting, but she's only a dew weeks off being 7. It's a lot to try to rationalise her way through.
> 
> It's school holidays now, so I'm hoping we can both have a break and get the rest we need. Thank you.



Sounds a bit like GERD but I wouldn't really know. I just have a friend on Facebook who posts about how she feels like a failure as a mother because she can't take care of her kid properly and it's been going on for awhile... my heart hurts for the both of you. Regardless of what it is, I hope it gets better and I hope you feel better! Both of you! Get the rest you need, get some sun!


----------



## Saoirse

arggghhh my friend had a pacemaker put in this week and i only found out about it last night and its so scary to think about. love the guy, but his self-destructive behaviors are catching up to him. love him so much though. just a wonderful, friendly upbeat homeboy with nothing but love for everyone else.


----------



## penguin

x0emnem0x said:


> Sounds a bit like GERD but I wouldn't really know. I just have a friend on Facebook who posts about how she feels like a failure as a mother because she can't take care of her kid properly and it's been going on for awhile... my heart hurts for the both of you. Regardless of what it is, I hope it gets better and I hope you feel better! Both of you! Get the rest you need, get some sun!



I guess we'll find out for sure once her referral comes through. I do the best I can, which isn't always easy as a single parent. My daughter constantly tells me how much she loves me and how great she thinks I am, which does help. Thank you.


----------



## HottiMegan

When Max was 3 weeks old, he had a feeding tube put in. It came out last week. He has been spurting stomach juices all week and is now infected. We have medicated ointment to put on the stoma but it's red and bloody constantly. He screams and cries out in pain nearly every hour. A trip to the ER and his doctor hasn't seemed to help. He had foot surgery scheduled for Wednesday that got cancelled cuz of it all. I am so down and upset about the turn of events. I can't make it feel better. I am sure we're going to have to go see the doctor again Monday. It's just not closing up. The GI doctor made it seem like no big deal to have the feeding tube removed and it's a nightmare!! I'm afraid he's gonna have to see a surgeon about this. I'm hoping we don't have to drive 200 miles down to Stanford for treatment.


----------



## TwilightStarr

I have been feeling like absolute crap all day long. Hurting all over and feel like I am going to fall  I absolutely hate my MS and what it is doing to me, even more I hate that it's Sunday which means it's a shot day


----------



## largenlovely

I recently found out that my other hip is diseased now too  we had hoped it was going to be fine but now I'm already bone on bone and it's showing signs of degeneration all in the hip. I'm sure it doesn't help that he made my right leg too long when he replaced that hip so I've had to lean on my left hip...but it's still degenerating way too fast. I'm going to the doctor in a couple days to get things in motion for getting hip shots. we're gonna try to do that for as long as possible before resorting to replacing this hip now but it has me super depressed...here I go again


----------



## Surlysomething

Stupid disease. You know I feel you on it.

I got a cane recently and it's one of the best things i've ever done. It's pretty cool looking too (which was really important to me). The best thing about it? When you're out in public people give you more space and are way more helpful.

One day at a time.



TwilightStarr said:


> I have been feeling like absolute crap all day long. Hurting all over and feel like I am going to fall  I absolutely hate my MS and what it is doing to me, even more I hate that it's Sunday which means it's a shot day


----------



## TwilightStarr

Surlysomething said:


> Stupid disease. You know I feel you on it.
> 
> I got a cane recently and it's one of the best things i've ever done. It's pretty cool looking too (which was really important to me). The best thing about it? When you're out in public people give you more space and are way more helpful.
> 
> One day at a time.




I have cane but the legs on it are too heavy and wide, so it throws me off more than helps me :/


----------



## Surlysomething

Get a better one. Mine is a "Hugo" and it's super light.




TwilightStarr said:


> I have cane but the legs on it are too heavy and wide, so it throws me off more than helps me :/


----------



## TwilightStarr

I'll definitely look into, thanks 

Waiting for my Neuro to call me back and probably heading to the hospital tomorrow, to most likely be admitted for a few days of IV steroids


----------



## Surlysomething

It sounds like you have a faster moving type of MS than I do. I'm sorry you have to go through much so fast and i'm sending lots of good thoughts your way. I have been having trouble sleeping and getting comfortable, lots of balance and stability issues and general overwhelming exhaustion. I took today off and slept. Tomorrow will be better (I keep saying to myself).


Take care
T




TwilightStarr said:


> I'll definitely look into, thanks
> 
> Waiting for my Neuro to call me back and probably heading to the hospital tomorrow, to most likely be admitted for a few days of IV steroids


----------



## CastingPearls

Lotus' former owner's brain cancer has returned and the tumor is inoperable due to where it's located. It's affecting his speech center and Sloane-Kettering has authorized him to participate in a last-resort experimental trial that involves taking tissue from the tumors already removed and creating a vaccine from them. The problem is that this has been his fourth or fifth operation and every time they remove a tumor, they have to remove more healthy brain tissue around it. The family and we friends are all trying to be positive but it's heartbreaking to see one's child, even though an adult, endure all of this. Plus, Lotus misses her Daddy.

There is a very small silver lining that when I told my landlord I had a second cat, and explained the situation, he was actually fine with it because he said I was the best tenant he's ever had so it was a non-issue and wishes Lotus' daddy well.


----------



## Saoirse

CastingPearls said:


> There is a very small silver lining that when I told my landlord I had a second cat, and explained the situation, he was actually fine with it because he said I was the best tenant he's ever had so it was a non-issue and wishes Lotus' daddy well.



Very awesome of you to take in your friend's kitty!


----------



## CastingPearls

Saoirse said:


> Very awesome of you to take in your friend's kitty!


Thank you. 

No one else would take her because she's a tripod. That was the first thing that attracted me to her! To those who didn't want her, their loss is my gain.


----------



## Saoirse

Just so sad today.

Woke up to news of the Ultimate Warrior dying. Get to work and Im talking to my boss when my coworker hands her the phone- OMG! NOO! THATS TERRIBLE! *crying* Turns out boss' friend's son was found dead this morning, probably a heroin OD. Imagine breaking down your son's door cause he wont answer you when you tell him to get up, and finding him in bed surrounded by blood and vomit, DEAD. Just so fucked up.

Then we're trying to get a kick out of other people's craziness on Dr. Phil, when a Special Report pops up and its the President giving a speech at Fort Hood, a memorial for the 3 men killed. And then we hear about the mass stabbing/shooting in PA, which thankfully no one has died (although last I heard there were one or two students in critical condition).

John Pinette died, Mickey Rooney died (ok he was old as dirt), my friend's cousin died in that Boston fire and then his brother-in-law took his own life just last week.

SO MUCH DEATH. Nothing that directly affects me, no one I know. But just so much sadness all around me. I need a vacation.


----------



## Oona

I was supposed to do a big photography deal tomorrow for the Centennial celebration of the town I live in. I dropped the ball, and my final paper for one of my last classes is due for review tomorrow night. There's no way I'll get it done before the event starts. So, I've had to contact a couple other photographers and pass the event on to them.

Boo


----------



## Mathias

I sat with my Mother for the evening and hearing her struggling to respond to me talking to her is killing me. I'm so completely and utterly broken right now.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

I am so sorry, Matt.  Comforting hugs coming your way.


----------



## dharmabean

I wish I lived in the era where a person can go into a business with a "Now Hiring" sign, express their interest for the position at hand and get hired on a, "Let's go ahead with a test drive for a few weeks and see how you do."
I bomb interviews, but I know my shit. I CAN DO the job at hand, I know that I can. I don't know how to convey that shit in a stupid interview with 3 people.




> "Regan,
> We had quite a few good candidates for this position. We thought your interview went great and we did like you. We had no concerns about your ability to perform the job. However, the candidate we ended up choosing had experience and skills that were very particular to our business and needs."


----------



## Mathias

My mother died peacefully this morning. This doesn't seem real.


----------



## supersoup

Mathias said:


> My mother died peacefully this morning. This doesn't seem real.



I am so, so sorry to hear this. My condolences to you and your loved ones.


----------



## Oona

Mathias said:


> My mother died peacefully this morning. This doesn't seem real.



I'm so sorry -hugs-


----------



## Tad

My condolences, Mathias. So sorry for your loss.


----------



## Surlysomething

I'm so very sorry for your loss. 






Mathias said:


> My mother died peacefully this morning. This doesn't seem real.


----------



## Ms Charlotte BBW

Mathias said:


> My mother died peacefully this morning. This doesn't seem real.



I am so sorry for your pain. Hugs and blessings during this difficult time.


----------



## ConnieLynn

I am so sorry for your loss and pain. Praying for you and yours. 




Mathias said:


> My mother died peacefully this morning. This doesn't seem real.


----------



## RabbitScorpion

So sorry for you loss, Matt. I lost my dad 17 years ago. It was quite an adjustment. 

I'll be praying for you and your family.


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

I am so, so sorry Matthias.


----------



## Rojodi

I am sorry for your loss, Matthias


----------



## Diana_Prince245

I'm sorry for your loss, Mathias.


----------



## tonynyc

I'm so sorry for your loss, Mathias. My condolences to you and family.


----------



## firefly

My condolences, Mathias. I am sorry for your loss.


----------



## penguin

I'm so sorry, Matt.


----------



## TwilightStarr

Mathias said:


> My mother died peacefully this morning. This doesn't seem real.




I'm so sorry for your loss


----------



## HottiMegan

Placing your trust and love into someone only to have it betrayed. My life was already spiraling. I think I'm officially broken.


----------



## Phantasia

HottiMegan said:


> Placing your trust and love into someone only to have it betrayed. My life was already spiraling. I think I'm officially broken.



Megan, you are a strong and beautiful woman who can not be broken. You are a martial artist (I have a 2nd degree BB in TKD) so I know you have a deep reserve of strength and fortitude. *hugs* Your sons have unconditional love for you and always will!


----------



## Gingembre

At a friend's wedding. It's good but all the happy coupleness of them and the guests, as well as the wedding itself, hits a nerve when my relationship just ended this week. I'm also struggling because I don't feel like I have the right to feel sad as it was my decision to end things. I know it was right for both of us in the long run, but I am sad. Very sad.


----------



## LeoGibson

Gingembre said:


> At a friend's wedding. It's good but all the happy coupleness of them and the guests, as well as the wedding itself, hits a nerve when my relationship just ended this week. I'm also struggling because I don't feel like I have the right to feel sad as it was my decision to end things. I know it was right for both of us in the long run, but I am sad. Very sad.



Screw it. It is tough, no matter who made the decision. That's ok. There will be another day, so just pour yourself a nice drink and stick you head up high darlin' and know that life is good no matter what is going on at the moment. You got this. It's all good.


----------



## Gingembre

LeoGibson said:


> Screw it. It is tough, no matter who made the decision. That's ok. There will be another day, so just pour yourself a nice drink and stick you head up high darlin' and know that life is good no matter what is going on at the moment. You got this. It's all good.



That's lovely, thank you.


----------



## dharmabean

cross post

Laptop died. I think I saved the hard drive (Here's to hoping photos, writing, and misc stuff can be pulled off. 

Transcription I am looking to start freelance at home is going to be on hold. Yar. (Yay for temp use of housemates, but it won't work indefinitely.)


----------



## x0emnem0x

My own fault, but, I never deleted my ex from my Snapchat, and we were talking last night. Which is weird cause whenever I tried to contact him since the breakup (6 months ago), all he would say is "no" or not respond at all. But he was actually talking to me, not about anything in specific, but the response just felt nice. I miss him and of course I'm not expecting anything from him, I want him back, but I don't at the same time, and I hate that if he asked I would take him back in a heartbeat. My feelings for him are still strong. Though, it was nice for him to actually respond for the first time since our breakup. 

I'm too nice for my own good, that is my downfall...


----------



## littlefairywren

My little grandmother has just been carried out of the house by three firemen and two ambulance crew with a suspected hip fracture. I'm sad AND worried.


----------



## spiritangel

littlefairywren said:


> My little grandmother has just been carried out of the house by three firemen and two ambulance crew with a suspected hip fracture. I'm sad AND worried.



Oh Kimmie I am so so so sorry to hear this sending lots of healing energy her way. I can only imagine how worried and upset you must be.

Big Hugs


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

littlefairywren said:


> My little grandmother has just been carried out of the house by three firemen and two ambulance crew with a suspected hip fracture. I'm sad AND worried.



I'm so sorry! You're both in my thoughts. Keep us updated. Hugs!


----------



## Tad

littlefairywren said:


> My little grandmother has just been carried out of the house by three firemen and two ambulance crew with a suspected hip fracture. I'm sad AND worried.



So sorry to hear that--must have been a really up-setting site, on top of everything else associated with that. I hope she heals up well.


----------



## x0emnem0x

littlefairywren said:


> My little grandmother has just been carried out of the house by three firemen and two ambulance crew with a suspected hip fracture. I'm sad AND worried.



In my thoughts! Hope she is okay.


----------



## Mishty

The little pit/lab puppy we rescued isn't doing so great....
I'm going broke buying medicine and puppy things...and he's just not doing too well. 

Guess I'll go in debt and take him to the animal hospital a few towns over.

Poor baby Sue.


----------



## Piink

Heaven gained another Angel this week. My cousin passed away from cancer. And now my kitten has gone missing.  I hate to ask what else could go wrong.


----------



## littlefairywren

spiritangel said:


> Oh Kimmie I am so so so sorry to hear this sending lots of healing energy her way. I can only imagine how worried and upset you must be.
> 
> Big Hugs





BigBeautifulMe said:


> I'm so sorry! You're both in my thoughts. Keep us updated. Hugs!





Tad said:


> So sorry to hear that--must have been a really up-setting site, on top of everything else associated with that. I hope she heals up well.





x0emnem0x said:


> In my thoughts! Hope she is okay.



Mishty I hope your puppy pulls through with all the love and care you're giving, and Piink, I'm so sorry for your loss. I also hope your little kitty comes home safe and well. 

Thank you so much for your messages, guys. My wee gran is home now, all bandaged and slinged...not with a fractured hip (thank goodness), but a fractured femur. She's so fragile, but still in good spirits and as perky as the morphine will allow. Now it's time for lots of TLC.


----------



## Saisha

Just finding out that a lovely lady aged 93 who was like a grandmother to us (distant cousin) is now upstairs bugging God as of early this morning. She had the most fantastic sense of humor and upbeat attitude towards life no matter what came her way.

Pink & Misty, saying prayers for you and your families.


----------



## HeavyDuty24

Not being able to be with the person i want to right now. Ugh hurts my very soul.


----------



## TwilightStarr

My Dad is in the hospital and has to have a triple bypass on Thursday


----------



## Saisha

TwilightStarr said:


> My Dad is in the hospital and has to have a triple bypass on Thursday



I am so sorry to hear this - he will be in my thoughts.


----------



## TwilightStarr

Saisha said:


> I am so sorry to hear this - he will be in my thoughts.




Thanks


----------



## Tad

I hope he is holding up well, and best wishes for everything to go smoothly tomorrow!


----------



## x0emnem0x

Cross post... but: One of my brothers just went to the hospital psych ward the other day because of his depression issues... being suicidal and such. Please keep him in your thoughts. We don't always see on the same page but I hope that he is okay and prayed for him, I imagine you all somewhat know how he feels but he just couldn't take it anymore. His ex left him high and dry (literally he was on a bunch of drugs and has no money apparently) depressed out of his mind after he spent all his money putting her through rehab and then she ran off with some other guy... so he's having troubles right now.


----------



## ScreamingChicken

I got an email from my mother last night that was addressed to me, my brother and my sister that lives out of state. She asked our father for a divorce last night. She said is at her breaking point with my dad, our other sister, and her husband (they all live in the same house with my sister's three sons). She didn't mention what his response was but I don't have a positive outlook on this at all, given past history and the individuals involved.

I am shell shocked at the moment. Going through my own divorce was hell but the thought of my sixty something parents doing the same sickens me to no end.


----------



## Saisha

ScreamingChicken said:


> I got an email....



I am so very sorry to hear this - having parents divorce at any age is not easy (btdt) - all of you will be in my thoughts and prayers.


----------



## Librarygirl

Still nothing seems right. Feeling fed up that I still have post-concussion syndrome. Acupuncture has helped the headaches for a bit, but dizziness has returned today. Sad that close friend of over seven years is still acting remote. I asked him if we were ok and said he seemed distant and he stuttered a bit and listed all the stuff that has been keeping him busy this past 6 months, but for all this cringy conversation and a half-hearted hug, he still seems different. I know we're only friends and I had accepted that - didn't even tell him how I really feel as I didn't want to ruin the friendship. Only now it seems I've lost that anyway. I have other friends but he made me feel special and was always there for me. Hurt like hell to hear him making small talk with someone else when he's barely made any effort with me of late. He used to forever be coming to find me, making silly jokes, sharing stuff and now for all he'll smile that's all there ever is. It's like I've come back to work after being off sick and nothing is the same. A mutual friend has just been off sick for 3 weeks and neither of us even knew. It used to be such a fun, friendly place and now no one has time to be polite or kind anymore. Said friend left in front of me without a backward glance, leaving me umbrella-less in the rain and I ran down the road despite feeling ill as I just had to get away.


----------



## Saisha

Librarygirl said:


> Still....



Hope you feel better soon - and while I know it hurts deeply, be thankful for the good times you shared and how you felt when feeling special - someone else will make you feel like that, probably when you least expect it - hold on to that feeling of feeling special - not because of the person who made you feel that way - but because of you being you - because of who you are - you touched someone's heart and they reciprocated what you gave them - remember you are so worth it....(I hope what I wrote makes sense).

Hugs to you


----------



## Librarygirl

Thank you! That means so much. And is far more helpful than anything any non-dims friends have said. I did feel that way and what he and I shared was special and meant something, even if it didn't last/ turn out as I'd hoped. And for all he might not be the same/ something has changed, I am still that person he found clever and funny and sweet. I think it's just hard as I've not been well- the irrational side of me is left feeling like I'm not the same/ have lost my 'allure', or just somehow wasn't in the right place at the right time and have missed my chance..

Thank you! : )


----------



## Saisha

Librarygirl said:


> ....



You are so very welcome and I am glad you are feeling a bit better  I know first-hand about how health problems can make one's life not how one would like - and it's not always easy for others to really comprehend unless they have gone through similar experiences - some people judge, others get scared or they just ignore. Just focus on getting better and keep a normal routine as much as possible - those are the most important things - everything else will fall into place when it's supposed it - you are strong, beautiful and worth loving and giving love as well 

and I'll quit rambling on here too


----------



## Tad

There are so many possibilities, you know. Somebody could have made a comment about how cosy you two looked together, which could have spooked him. He could have let his imagination roam beyond friendship, then felt guilty and decided he needed to keep further away from you to avoid screwing up. He could have stressful things going on in his life that have him far more distracted than is first apparent, leading to poor behavior. He could be less wonderful than he previously appeared, able to turn on the charm but now you are seeing him when he isnt doing that. He could get freaked out by all sorts of illness and incapacity and doing a bad job of hiding the fact. He could have been more in to you than you realized, and somehow felt a bit jilted from all that happened. Etc, so on, and so forth.

None of which changes that the change in his behavior sucks for you, and is extra unfortunate when it has landed on top of the lingering concussion symptoms. That is a double-dose of disappointment and stress which nobody is going to enjoy going through.

I do hope that you steadily, if gradually, start feeling more like yourself. As for him, well, I hope that some day you get some indication of what is going on with him, so that you dont remain in the dark.. and at the moment Im kind of hoping that he bumbles into a wasp nest, and has to spend some miserable recovery time of his own (sorry for being petty on your behalf).


----------



## Librarygirl

Tad said:


> There are so many possibilities, you know. Somebody could have made a comment about how cosy you two looked together, which could have spooked him. He could have let his imagination roam beyond friendship, then felt guilty and decided he needed to keep further away from you to avoid screwing up. He could have stressful things going on in his life that have him far more distracted than is first apparent, leading to poor behavior. He could be less wonderful than he previously appeared, able to turn on the charm but now you are seeing him when he isnt doing that. He could get freaked out by all sorts of illness and incapacity and doing a bad job of hiding the fact. He could have been more in to you than you realized, and somehow felt a bit jilted from all that happened. Etc, so on, and so forth.
> 
> Thanks Tad! I think it may well be something from the above. I had wondered if it was a comment from someone - like his boss seeing us leaving together once (innocently chatting) or one time when I hugged him in the street before we were both away from work for a while. Or maybe he does like me, but as he is (as far as I know)still in a relationship is trying to do the right thing. Others have suggested he may have stuff going on with his parents' health and a bullying boss. I hate to think he isn't who I imagined (having gone through this before with someone I was actually dating), but after years of friendship can't believe he'd suddenly be so different. I suppose I just thought that at least I had a good friend who would always be there and I'd found someone who was who I thought/ could be relied upon, even if there might never be as much as I'd like between us. It's the lack of humour and the lack of interest - like he never asks how I am or how things are going with my house move. Yet last year he was always remembering stuff I'd said, being empathetic and keeping up to date and sharing things about his childhood, parents, thoughts and we'd have lots of in-jokes etc. It feels like I'm less than part of the furniture sometimes, yet he pepped up and was more normal in a meeting with my boss present last week. Combined with my natural shyness and feeling ill, I'm left feeling like I daren't even go and find him to chat like I used to - as I'll just be more hurt when he looks impatient. Yet I feel like if I don't try to make an effort the distance between us will just grow and grow. Today he came into where I usually sit and I was so happy thinking he'd come to see me like in the past - only it turned out he'd just come to collect the visiting student who'd called in to take her for a cup of tea. Not sure whether to back off or keep trying to find the 'old him'. I'm finding work and life quite tough right now and I could do with our old closeness and his humour. Scared I will just blurt all this out, but that would probably only make things worse.
> 
> I do hope that you steadily, if gradually, start feeling more like yourself. As for him, well, I hope that some day you get some indication of what is going on with him, so that you dont remain in the dark.. and at the moment Im kind of hoping that he bumbles into a wasp nest, and has to spend some miserable recovery time of his own (sorry for being petty on your behalf).



Thanks again - it is a gradual thing and it helps to be reminded of that - it isn't so bad when I look at how I was back in February, when I was asleep most of the day and unable to read / watch much TV or really do anything at all. I think I just feel impatient to have life back as it was and in terms of health and relationships, it can't always be like that - it is a case of wait and see and being patient.

Haha! I do feel a little of the wasp nest thing! After initial sympathy he was very unfeeling when I got upset about some really bad work moments when I first got back from sick leave (he left me to do a talk when I was feeling really unwell and couldn't even remember what I'd said 5 mins before - and then didn't seem to care that I was really upset and humiliated) and I think I've found that hard to forgive. It's odd as he has always been unusually kind and a good listener when I've been hurt by ex-boyfriends / mean bosses in years gone by. So thank you for being petty on my behalf - I won't say he doesn't deserve it!!

Glad to have a day off work and away from things tomorrow.


----------



## x0emnem0x

My man has been very distant this weekend... I was trying to ignore it thinking that I was just being silly and overly-attached but then I asked him because I just wanted to make sure everything is okay. He said he was just depressed, mostly because he was working between jobs and "stuff" ... It seems like he just doesn't really want to talk, and I want to make him feel better but I feel helpless. I can't go see him this weekend cause he has his kids (I haven't met them yet and we're waiting), but it also makes me sad that he feels how he does. Not to mention I just want him to talk to me about what he is feeling, and he has, he just doesn't seem to want to really confide in me which kind of hurts. We've been together a month and this is the first time I've felt... unhappy. The other day he was just saying "without you around I'd still probably be depressed", now here he is saying he is depressed, so I feel like he's just getting bored of me or I can't help him... But maybe I'm just over thinking it... Things always seem too good to be true.


----------



## ODFFA

Really, this post is nothing new - in the sense that almost every sad post of mine has been about this. But I'm afraid I have no other outlet, so here I am.

In many ways, my divorce felt like nothing compared to how I'm feeling now. There's so much more to let go of this time around, and my heart just will not stop breaking.

[Insert every cheesy breakup cliché you've ever heard here, because they all apply] >_<


----------



## Saisha

ODFFA said:


> Your post....



((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((gentlest hugs to you))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Just remember you are very loved and adored by many here....you'll be in my prayers to find peace....


----------



## x0emnem0x

ODFFA said:


> Really, this post is nothing new - in the sense that almost every sad post of mine has been about this. But I'm afraid I have no other outlet, so here I am.
> 
> In many ways, my divorce felt like nothing compared to how I'm feeling now. There's so much more to let go of this time around, and my heart just will not stop breaking.
> 
> [Insert every cheesy breakup cliché you've ever heard here, because they all apply] >_<



*hugssssss* Keep you're chin up!


----------



## ODFFA

Saisha said:


> ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((gentlest hugs to you))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
> 
> Just remember you are very loved and adored by many here....you'll be in my prayers to find peace....



Thank you so much. You really are lovely. Oh, and in answer to your previous question on this thread........ Zorro was kinda right. Yay divination! 



x0emnem0x said:


> *hugssssss* Keep you're chin up!



Thank you as well, beauteous lady. I hope things have gone better for you too since your last post. You deserve to feel appreciated and not pushed away emotionally. I hope going forward you can feel good about 'being there' for him, at times by giving him the space he needs, and that you'll be appreciated. For supporting him, but mostly just for being you.


----------



## Rojodi

Pandora!

Started it and "Mandy" comes on, causing instant memories of a Mandy I knew when I was in high school and college. She was my landlords' oldest daughter who suffered from Spina Bifida and severe cerebral palsy. Though she could never say hello or anything to me, whenever I was close to her or entered the room, her eyes lit up, beautiful blue eyes.

Though she passed peacefully in her sleep over 25 years ago, whenever I hear that song, I think of her.


----------



## CAMellie

I found out yesterday that my Grandma Ida passed away. She was 92 and led a very happy and satisfying life...but it's sad knowing she's not around anymore


----------



## Saisha

CAMellie said:


> I found out yesterday that my Grandma Ida passed away. She was 92 and led a very happy and satisfying life...but it's sad knowing she's not around anymore



I am so very sorry to hear this - you and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers....


----------



## HottiMegan

I'm never going to be giving enough, i'm never going to be patient enough, i'm always wrong, i'm never going to be good enough. To him, i ruin his life/happiness. (not husband, son)


----------



## Deacone

This horrendous headache I have


----------



## Saisha

Rojodi said:


> whenever I hear that song, I think of her.



I am sure she knows you are thinking of her and appreciates it 



HottiMegan said:


> I'm....



(((((((((hugs to you)))))))))) hope things improve soon where he realizes what an amazing person you are and how lucky he is to have you as his mom! 



Deacone said:


> This horrendous headache I have



Hope you're feeling better soon


----------



## Crafty Barnardo

When your significant other not into your desires, it just sucks. Lol


----------



## Ms Charlotte BBW

It's storming and I want to go in the pool!


----------



## Surlysomething

Don't go to the beach when you hate yourself.


----------



## Deacone

I had a wonderful dream that I was pregnant with John and my first child. It was a fantastic experience...then I woke up and I wasn't pregnant.

And I was crying for the rest of the day


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

Deacone said:


> I had a wonderful dream that I was pregnant with John and my first child. It was a fantastic experience...then I woke up and I wasn't pregnant.
> 
> And I was crying for the rest of the day



When you really want a child, it can be really painful coming out of those kinds of dreams. I've been there, too. (((((((((((Deacone)))))))))))) Hang in there.


----------



## ODFFA

I found out last night that a family friend of ours is getting divorced after 14 years of marriage. This news really, really shook me. They were one of those couples that you'd expect would be the last ones on earth to ever get divorced; and she was one of those women I looked up to for so many amazing reasons - not the least of which was how deeply and easily she loves. I still admire her. And I really hurt for her especially, because I know she gave her all. 

I see so many similarities between myself and this woman as a person.... (which, I just realised, is perhaps a little arrogant to say after singing her praises  ); and I'm now pretty sure I wouldn't like to get married again. I may even be a bit relationship-wary altogether. I wear my heart on my sleeve. I say the shit that a lot of people keep to themselves. I cry openly. I'm cool with a reasonable amount of PDA. I laugh (too) easily. If I love you, you'll know it - and so will everyone around me. 

It's hardly the cool, suave way to go, but it's something about myself I don't think I'd like to change. But man, it's a vulnerable place to be, and I just realised again how important it is for me to find someone whose _heart_ will be 100% in it.....for the long haul. Someone who won't allow the ins and outs of life to make him forget about showing me now and again that I still have his heart. And then to take care and not lose myself. And communicate communicate communicate - kindly, without accusation.

Some days that all seems a little on the unlikely side though. I feel like that's all too rare a find. And I've had people make me feel bad about my overly high, typically female expectations. I just don't know anymore.


----------



## Hozay J Garseeya

ODFFA said:


> I found out last night that a family friend of ours is getting divorced after 14 years of marriage. This news really, really shook me. They were one of those couples that you'd expect would be the last ones on earth to ever get divorced; and she was one of those women I looked up to for so many amazing reasons - not the least of which was how deeply and easily she loves. I still admire her. And I really hurt for her especially, because I know she gave her all.
> 
> I see so many similarities between myself and this woman as a person.... (which, I just realised, is perhaps a little arrogant to say after singing her praises  ); and I'm now pretty sure *I wouldn't like to get married again*. I may even be a bit relationship-wary altogether. I wear my heart on my sleeve. I say the shit that a lot of people keep to themselves. I cry openly. I'm cool with a reasonable amount of PDA. I laugh (too) easily. If I love you, you'll know it - and so will everyone around me.
> 
> It's hardly the cool, suave way to go, but it's something about myself I don't think I'd like to change. But man, it's a vulnerable place to be, and I just realised again how important it is for me to find someone whose _heart_ will be 100% in it.....for the long haul. Someone who won't allow the ins and outs of life to make him forget about showing me now and again that I still have his heart. And then to take care and not lose myself. And communicate communicate communicate - kindly, without accusation.
> 
> Some days that all seems a little on the unlikely side though. I feel like that's all too rare a find. And I've had people make me feel bad about my overly high, typically female expectations. I just don't know anymore.


This is all I took from this lovely worded message. 

This throws the world's biggest wrench into the wheel that is my life


----------



## ODFFA

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> This is all I took from this lovely worded message.
> 
> This throws the world's biggest wrench into the wheel that is my life



I'm not promising anything, but..... maybe if you asked me in spanish...... while wearing pants. You never know.


----------



## Hozay J Garseeya

ODFFA said:


> I'm not promising anything, but..... maybe if you asked me in spanish...... while wearing pants. You never know.



Ya'll heard her people. 

I'm going to put on some...pantalones.


----------



## Deacone

BigBeautifulMe said:


> When you really want a child, it can be really painful coming out of those kinds of dreams. I've been there, too. (((((((((((Deacone)))))))))))) Hang in there.



It was incredibly painful  Thanks BigBeautifulMe <3


----------



## flyingsolo101

Hearing the news about Robin Williams. A great performer, and from what I've gathered from listening to him on podcasts when he drops into an indie comedy set, a very sweet man. Rest in peace.


----------



## x0emnem0x

flyingsolo101 said:


> Hearing the news about Robin Williams. A great performer, and from what I've gathered from listening to him on podcasts when he drops into an indie comedy set, a very sweet man. Rest in peace.



This.  I'm hurting today.


----------



## Ms Charlotte BBW

x0emnem0x said:


> This.  I'm hurting today.



My heart is broken over this...


----------



## one2one

x0emnem0x said:


> This.  I'm hurting today.



Me, too. He was brilliant, and it is such a tragic kind of loss. My dad looked remarkably like him and died suddenly the same year Patch Adams was released. Even some of his character's mannerisms in the film reminded me of my dad. It was years before I could see his films again, but then they became comforting and a way of still having something like a little bit of my dad still here ... and now it's gone again.


----------



## Rojodi

I've been in a funk since Saturday night, hearing of the death of a young racer at a place I once watched races 3, 4 times a year. Then sickos sharing videos of the accident that eventually took his life.

And then today, Robin Williams. 

Riots in Missouri over the senseless death of a young man by a cop.


----------



## spookytwigg

Like pretty much everyone else I'm gutted about Robin Williams, I've not been this upset by a celebrity death in years. The man was a complete genius of comedy (and acting in general). I think I'm going to have a binge on my favourite films tonight.


----------



## Deacone

spookytwigg said:


> Like pretty much everyone else I'm gutted about Robin Williams, I've not been this upset by a celebrity death in years. The man was a complete genius of comedy (and acting in general). I think I'm going to have a binge on my favourite films tonight.



I think a lot of the people who grew up through the 90's will have a special bond with him because he did all the great classics of those years.

I for one am watching Hook right now to commiserate. I loved that man


----------



## rellis10

spookytwigg said:


> Like pretty much everyone else I'm gutted about Robin Williams, I've not been this upset by a celebrity death in years. The man was a complete genius of comedy (and acting in general). I think I'm going to have a binge on my favourite films tonight.



Like a lot of people this hit me hard too. A truly special actor and comedian and I'll be watching my favourite movie, Dead Poets Society, very soon to remember him... probably with a lot more tears than usual.

Rest in peace, Oh Captain My Captain.


----------



## spookytwigg

I love him and I've seen tonnes of his films but I've still got so many I need to see (dead poets society andcwhat dreams may come being high on my list). I'm watching his weapons of self destruction live show but I think I'm gonna chuck the birdcage on next.


----------



## Saoirse

Rojodi said:


> I've been in a funk since Saturday night, hearing of the death of a young racer at a place I once watched races 3, 4 times a year. Then sickos sharing videos of the accident that eventually took his life.



Im not into racing, but I have friends who are diehard NASCAR fans, so Ive I know Tony Stewarts reputation. But it really was a heart-breaking situation for all involved. It was an very unfortunate accident.


----------



## Rojodi

Saoirse said:


> Im not into racing, but I have friends who are diehard NASCAR fans, so Ive I know Tony Stewarts reputation. But it really was a heart-breaking situation for all involved. It was an very unfortunate accident.



His reputation should not enter the discussion. EVERY racer has moments of ill-temper.


----------



## Saoirse

Deacone said:


> I think a lot of the people who grew up through the 90's will have a special bond with him because he did all the great classics of those years.
> 
> I for one am watching Hook right now to commiserate. I loved that man



Yes!! I know he had decades of great stuff, but as a 90s kid, I knew him from Hook, Jumanji, Mrs. Doubtfire, Jack, even Popeye! Hell, He was The Genie in Aladdin! HE MADE THAT MOVIE!


I went into work today, feeling blue after hearing about Robin's death last night (we we're mid-coitus and it was announced on the radio. Awesome mood killer). I was talking to a coworker/close friend and I brought it up and said how sad it was. His response was "Yea, but what about whats going on with Hamas and ISIS and all that death and despair??"

I was like Whoa hold up. I know in the grand scheme of things one man's death is not a huge deal, but Robin Williams was a legend. HE MADE GENERATIONS LAUGH. He brought happiness and laughter to millions of people throughout his life. Its people like Robin Williams who make life in this world bearable, when we are bombarded with news about war and death and poverty. How many times can we look at pictures of a young boy holding a severed head???? 

*sigh* He agreed with me, but the whole conversation has left a bitter taste in my mouth. I am surrounded by people who are so focused on the nasty parts of life, they fail to see the specks of good. Its so discouraging.


----------



## Sascha

I mentioned to someone that I was sad about Robin Williams and they started lecturing me on how he'd used drugs etc, but who knows whether the drug use was a symptom of his depression. I don't care anyway, it's sad and he was really unique and so, so talented. I know he's a celebrity and there are horrible things happening in the world but it's still sad as he brought happiness to a lot of people and he still leaves a family behind who loved him and are probably feeling pretty helpless right now.


----------



## luvmybhm

robin williams.


----------



## Surlysomething

I so feel you on this one.

I struggle as it is to have good days and I work with the world's most miserable people. They don't need to talk to me about all the world's pains and then compare the amount that NFL players make because I don't give a fuck. We need some happy in the world too so they can suck it.





Saoirse said:


> Yes!! I know he had decades of great stuff, but as a 90s kid, I knew him from Hook, Jumanji, Mrs. Doubtfire, Jack, even Popeye! Hell, He was The Genie in Aladdin! HE MADE THAT MOVIE!
> 
> 
> I went into work today, feeling blue after hearing about Robin's death last night (we we're mid-coitus and it was announced on the radio. Awesome mood killer). I was talking to a coworker/close friend and I brought it up and said how sad it was. His response was "Yea, but what about whats going on with Hamas and ISIS and all that death and despair??"
> 
> I was like Whoa hold up. I know in the grand scheme of things one man's death is not a huge deal, but Robin Williams was a legend. HE MADE GENERATIONS LAUGH. He brought happiness and laughter to millions of people throughout his life. Its people like Robin Williams who make life in this world bearable, when we are bombarded with news about war and death and poverty. How many times can we look at pictures of a young boy holding a severed head????
> 
> *sigh* He agreed with me, but the whole conversation has left a bitter taste in my mouth. I am surrounded by people who are so focused on the nasty parts of life, they fail to see the specks of good. Its so discouraging.


----------



## moore2me

It is truly sad that our brightest stars here on earth, often burn out too early. The intense flame and that they emit sometimes consumes their fragile body and mind. It has happened over and over again with great poets, writers, musicians, painters, actors, kings, queens, dancers, leaders of men and women and some regular people that draw too much attention to themselves. I think Elton John best expressed this to our generation in his tribute song "Goodbye Normal Jean" - which he later refashioned into a tribute to Princess Diana upon her untimely death.

Even tho Robin Williams appears to have taken his own life do not forget that almost everyone attempting/taking this route is in the gripes of severe mental depression most of the time. This severe depression is caused by a major storm in the affected person's brain and the victim desperately needs medication to quiet and control the raging chemicals. It is not something they can "pull themselves out of". 

This perfect storm in one's mind is something that needs professional help. The patient desperately needs medication and they need trained medical help for the long haul. They need this help ASAP. There is no shame in getting help for depression anymore than there is shame than getting help for a large kidney stone that needs to be removed or a broken leg that needs to be set. A patient should do it, a friend should encourage it, a family member should insist on it.

And poor Robin Williams, who enchanted all of us for years, was living thru this in his head while he still could laugh and be the funniest many alive. Now we learned, that fate also threw at him the burden of Parkinson's??? This would have taken away his mobility - his humor was based on movement largely. Parkinson's would have taken away his clear voice - he had a tongue as sharp as a sword. Robin could mimic anyone and anything - Parkinson's would have stopped this. The eventual fate of this cruel disease had to have broken his heart and further driven him in the blackness of depression. 

I will miss Robin Williams. I am sorry he could have not been rescued from the grips of depression. I firmly believe that most people that suffer such fates can be rescued and be made whole again. I have lost members of my family to depression and I have seen closeup the carnage it causes. Try and help your loved ones in similar situations. (Tho becareful not to be drawn into being an enabler for the person if they are exhibiting bad behaviors.)


----------



## luvmybhm

took my daughter back to college today. i am gonna miss seeing her every day.:really sad:


----------



## Rojodi

Another death on a racetrack this evening. This time in NJ.


----------



## CAMellie

Pregnancy hormones. 30 weeks today and I've been crying for 2 days now...over nothing.


----------



## Rojodi

People will lap up the clap-trap Michael Savage spews, buy his book and believe it's the truth. Sometimes, editors and publishers have no common sense.


----------



## littlefairywren

There are vultures in my family. Greedy and plotting constantly over possible spoils, even though they've had everything handed to them and have never wanted for anything. I don't think I've ever hated anyone...until now. It's not a comfortable feeling at all.


----------



## Deacone

I've watched the end of True Blood, and I'm sad the series has ended


----------



## x0emnem0x

So we're having to get rid of our dog, though really it isn't ours, it's our sisters, but she moved out and left her with us.Trying to find someone to take her or a no kill shelter. She is the sweetest dog, but has an ear infection the vets can't get rid of and money is tight already. We don't want to get rid of her but we kind of have to, not only are we going to be moving, probably to a small apartment or something due to finances (we're not sure when, exactly), but we are most likely not going to be able to bring her. Also trying to get someone to adopt one of our cats. The other one is really old, so we planned to keep her, and the other one (we have 3) is a total ass to anyone except us, so we can't really get rid of her, as much as I'd like to, cause she's literally Satan (again, this was one of my sisters animals she dropped off here when she couldn't take it with her)... It's also difficult because of finances again like I said... we spend so much a week just in animal food. Reason we're moving is due to bankruptcy and not making payments on the house, so eventually it is going to foreclose. I am sad because of the animals (it's not their fault we can't take care of them, they don't deserve that), but also the fact that this is our house that I grew up in since I was a baby. And we can't pay for it. We have to leave. I'm so used to this house but we can't keep up repairs on it or pay anything. As it is we already pay taxes a year behind them when we're supposed to. It's a crappy situation but I'm praying everything turns out how it's supposed to.


----------



## lille

x0emnem0x said:


> So we're having to get rid of our dog, though really it isn't ours, it's our sisters, but she moved out and left her with us.Trying to find someone to take her or a no kill shelter. She is the sweetest dog, but has an ear infection the vets can't get rid of and money is tight already. We don't want to get rid of her but we kind of have to, not only are we going to be moving, probably to a small apartment or something due to finances (we're not sure when, exactly), but we are most likely not going to be able to bring her. Also trying to get someone to adopt one of our cats. The other one is really old, so we planned to keep her, and the other one (we have 3) is a total ass to anyone except us, so we can't really get rid of her, as much as I'd like to, cause she's literally Satan (again, this was one of my sisters animals she dropped off here when she couldn't take it with her)... It's also difficult because of finances again like I said... we spend so much a week just in animal food. Reason we're moving is due to bankruptcy and not making payments on the house, so eventually it is going to foreclose. I am sad because of the animals (it's not their fault we can't take care of them, they don't deserve that), but also the fact that this is our house that I grew up in since I was a baby. And we can't pay for it. We have to leave. I'm so used to this house but we can't keep up repairs on it or pay anything. As it is we already pay taxes a year behind them when we're supposed to. It's a crappy situation but I'm praying everything turns out how it's supposed to.


I'm sorry you're in such a tough situation. Does your vet have a bulletin board you can maybe put a flier up to help rehome your dog? They may also know of where no kill shelters are.


----------



## Saoirse

Someone very special to me is leaving tomorrow for a trip down south. Supposedly just for a week, but he's saying he might just stay down there if the work is good.

It would be such a good thing for him, to get a change of scenery and start a new life. He's miserable here and I dont see it changing without him moving. 


I want him to be happy, but the thought of not seeing him as much as I do now is breaking my heart.


----------



## Hozay J Garseeya

Specifically two things. Related to two different people that are pretty important to me. 

One person seems to never really try and reach out to me. Everyone is busy, and we all have things to do. I get that, I really do. I've just been a bit emotionally invested in this person. It feels like three weeks, but I'm sure it's closer to 1 and a half or something like that. I decided to stand strong and just give them a chance to prove me wrong. Let them reach out to me and tell me they appreciate me, or at te least that they remembered I was alive. I waited patiently online whil they were online...nothing. I'm not asking for a grand gesture, but even a "hey," or "good night" would have sufficed. 

Ugh, after all that I don't even want to go on about the other person. 

Such is life


----------



## Ohio Lady

The big thing making me sad right now is that my best friend Anna and her husband lost their 39 year old daughter suddenly for no apparent reason and the worst thing is the autopsy showed no cause for her death either. I met with them on the 8th of this month and we shared laughter and some tears remember their beautiful daughter who had just ran a marathon 4 days before her death.. (They are thinking it was something electrical to do with her heart is why it can't be found when performing the autopsy).. it would be so sad and not knowing what caused all this would be even worse.


----------



## x0emnem0x

The new DIMS profile layout. As much as I love it, I can't creep on people anymore cause it tells them when I do. :'(


----------



## Surlysomething

I still love you though, Josie..ya big jerk! Sing me a song. 



Hozay J Garseeya said:


> Specifically two things. Related to two different people that are pretty important to me.
> 
> One person seems to never really try and reach out to me. Everyone is busy, and we all have things to do. I get that, I really do. I've just been a bit emotionally invested in this person. It feels like three weeks, but I'm sure it's closer to 1 and a half or something like that. I decided to stand strong and just give them a chance to prove me wrong. Let them reach out to me and tell me they appreciate me, or at te least that they remembered I was alive. I waited patiently online whil they were online...nothing. I'm not asking for a grand gesture, but even a "hey," or "good night" would have sufficed.
> 
> Ugh, after all that I don't even want to go on about the other person.
> 
> Such is life


----------



## Tad

x0emnem0x said:


> The new DIMS profile layout. As much as I love it, I can't creep on people anymore cause it tells them when I do. :'(



Whoa--I'd not seen that yet! The new Admin is shaking things up I guess.


----------



## Hozay J Garseeya

Surlysomething said:


> I still love you though, Josie..ya big jerk! Sing me a song.



You're too sweet T. Suck my toe!


----------



## Surlysomething

Duuude. I hate feet!

SING



Hozay J Garseeya said:


> You're too sweet T. Suck my toe!


----------



## Saisha

Hozay J Garseeya said:


> Specifically two things. Related to two different people that are pretty important to me.



Jose, give it a bit of time. You never know what they are going through right now and maybe they are having to focus on themselves. If it does turn out that they don't appreciate you for being the special person you are, as much as it hurts, let go. You have a beautiful heart and soul to you, don't ever forget that.



Ohio Lady said:


> The big thing making me sad right now...



I am so sorry this happened. All of you will be in my prayers....


----------



## BigBeautifulMe

x0emnem0x said:


> The new DIMS profile layout. As much as I love it, I can't creep on people anymore cause it tells them when I do. :'(



I stalked yours to see what you were talking about. Then I looked at my own. Interesting! lol.


----------



## x0emnem0x

BigBeautifulMe said:


> I stalked yours to see what you were talking about. Then I looked at my own. Interesting! lol.



So odd huh?


----------



## Deacone

It is odd! But cool. Just means I can't blatantly stalk people 

I'm sad because I'm stuck in work by myself for another hour and I need to pee :<


----------



## mermaid8

I guess if I was honest what is making me sad right now is the lack of companionship in my life. Most people have at least one person in their life they consider a confidant or companion. I've struggle my whole life to find a friend I could consider a confidant, someone I could share my deepest feelings and thoughts with. Unfortunately, I don't have anyone that fits that role in my life and must rely only on myself everyday. Sadly, this makes life more of a struggle because I must hold everything deep inside.


----------



## MsBrightside

mermaid8 said:


> I guess if I was honest what is making me sad right now is the lack of companionship in my life. Most people have at least one person in their life they consider a confidant or companion. I've struggle my whole life to find a friend I could consider a confidant, someone I could share my deepest feelings and thoughts with. Unfortunately, I don't have anyone that fits that role in my life and must rely only on myself everyday. Sadly, this makes life more of a struggle because I must hold everything deep inside.



Hi, mermaid8. What I'm about to say doesn't really address the issue you've raised in this post, which is having someone in your life with whom you are emotionally intimate. Obviously, establishing a close relationship like that isn't something that can happen overnight, and, unfortunately, it's not something that everyone is able to experience. When we do, it's certainly a blessing. 

But some of your other posts have mentioned a more generalized feeling of isolation, and I wondered if you had considered finding a worthy cause that you believe in and offering your services as a volunteer? It may seem like a big step to take, and it may require some effort to find a good match for your own interest and skills (and yes, everyone has something valuable to contribute), but in my experience, volunteering is a great way to stand back and gain some perspective on your own problems while (hopefully) helping other people with theirs. Also, I've met some amazing people over the years through various sorts of volunteer work; not suprisingly most of them are kind, generous, and friendly.  At the very least, you would have an opportunity to make more connections with others with whom you share a common interest, and that could be a foundation for the kind of closeness you are seeking.


----------



## x0emnem0x

mermaid8 said:


> I guess if I was honest what is making me sad right now is the lack of companionship in my life. Most people have at least one person in their life they consider a confidant or companion. I've struggle my whole life to find a friend I could consider a confidant, someone I could share my deepest feelings and thoughts with. Unfortunately, I don't have anyone that fits that role in my life and must rely only on myself everyday. Sadly, this makes life more of a struggle because I must hold everything deep inside.



I know how this feels, and though I've had a number of people I can talk to since feeling that way, sometimes I feel like I don't have anyone. Even now sometimes it just feels like no one cares or wants to talk to me, and it sucks, but things will turn around. I don't know if you're religious, but I have gotten a lot closer with my God and I believe that he has a plan for you, someone will walk into your life when you least expect it... I've experienced that myself. Even if you're not religious, I am one of those people that believe everything happens for a reason and I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Keep your head up! 

I agree with MsBrightside too though, try getting into some volunteer work. As someone who is very shy and pretty antisocial, I know it may be difficult but once I get into it and people talk to me I actually feel a little better, you could find someone who could impact your life like no other! I will be keeping an eye out for you hoping to see some positive changes, because I know what it feels like to be sad, as I have suffered from depression since I was very young - I hope you feel better!


----------



## mermaid8

MsBrightside said:


> Hi, mermaid8. What I'm about to say doesn't really address the issue you've raised in this post, which is having someone in your life with whom you are emotionally intimate. Obviously, establishing a close relationship like that isn't something that can happen overnight, and, unfortunately, it's not something that everyone is able to experience. When we do, it's certainly a blessing.
> 
> But some of your other posts have mentioned a more generalized feeling of isolation, and I wondered if you had considered finding a worthy cause that you believe in and offering your services as a volunteer? It may seem like a big step to take, and it may require some effort to find a good match for your own interest and skills (and yes, everyone has something valuable to contribute), but in my experience, volunteering is a great way to stand back and gain some perspective on your own problems while (hopefully) helping other people with theirs. Also, I've met some amazing people over the years through various sorts of volunteer work; not suprisingly most of them are kind, generous, and friendly.  At the very least, you would have an opportunity to make more connections with others with whom you share a common interest, and that could be a foundation for the kind of closeness you are seeking.




I agree with your point and yes, volunteering is always a good way to helps others and meet people. I'm just not in the place in my life where that is a possibility. I know this may sound like a poor excuse but it's the truth. 

Please know that I am very thankful for the advice.


----------



## mermaid8

x0emnem0x said:


> I know how this feels, and though I've had a number of people I can talk to since feeling that way, sometimes I feel like I don't have anyone. Even now sometimes it just feels like no one cares or wants to talk to me, and it sucks, but things will turn around. I don't know if you're religious, but I have gotten a lot closer with my God and I believe that he has a plan for you, someone will walk into your life when you least expect it... I've experienced that myself. Even if you're not religious, I am one of those people that believe everything happens for a reason and I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Keep your head up!
> 
> I agree with MsBrightside too though, try getting into some volunteer work. As someone who is very shy and pretty antisocial, I know it may be difficult but once I get into it and people talk to me I actually feel a little better, you could find someone who could impact your life like no other! I will be keeping an eye out for you hoping to see some positive changes, because I know what it feels like to be sad, as I have suffered from depression since I was very young - I hope you feel better!



Thank you for the sympathy, it is greatly appreciated. 

I hope someday I can find someone I can call a confidant. I hope it happens soon because I'm running out of hope. Again thank you for caring.


----------



## mermaid8

Had plans with my mom ( I know not always the coolest thing for some people) for a little retail therapy but as usual she changed the plans without even bothering to inform me. She dumped like hot potato to hangout with my little sister and her kids. It may not have been intentional but nevertheless it is still hurtful. My mom has a tendency to dump me for either my older sister and her kids or my little sister and her kids. I guess to some people this wouldn't bother them but I still kind of thing happens to be all the time. I'm always left out. Guess I'll just go for a walk alone.


----------



## Saoirse

just read an article in the paper about the school board thinking about closing down the elementary school i went to and i burst into tears.

i love that little school. i have so many great memories from there. i met my best friend there. the thought of it being closed down is heartbreaking.

they're also thinking about closing the elementary school in the town i work in. for the past few years, ive been thinking about moving to that town and ive dreamed of marrying a local boy (yea i even have him picked out lol), living in his big, beautiful house and sending our children right across the street to school.

silly, i know, but closing these schools would just tear me apart.


----------



## Tad

x0emnem0x said:


> The new DIMS profile layout. As much as I love it, I can't creep on people anymore cause it tells them when I do. :'(



That change has been backed out now. The profile page no longer shows your most recent visitors, nor what you are currently viewing.


----------



## FluffyButterfly80

The fact that I have to go to work in less than 90 minutes. I'd much rather stay home and do nothing today. *sigh*


----------



## Saisha

Wallpaper paste....and the never ending flow of lava over unsettled magma....


----------



## Saoirse

just. everything.

everything makes me sad.


----------



## CAMellie

My son is an amazing miracle baby. My husband and I have suffered three previous losses, I'm older (42), I have health issues (physical and mental), and yet he's almost here...and my husband's immediate family refuse to even acknowledge his existence! His extended family are always in contact to find out how the baby and I are but his parents, sister, and brothers NEVER mention him...ever! Adrian and I will be talking about Gabriel right in front of them and they try to change the subject. It breaks my heart that they are taking their dislike of me out on a little innocent baby. Their own kin.
Another thing I'm sad about, but in a wistful way, is the fact that in 3 weeks my little boy will be here...and not safe and sound inside me. I'll miss his kicks, rolls, and hiccups.


----------



## moore2me

CAMellie said:


> My son is an amazing miracle baby. My husband and I have suffered three previous losses, I'm older (42), I have health issues (physical and mental), and yet he's almost here...and my husband's immediate family refuse to even acknowledge his existence! His extended family are always in contact to find out how the baby and I are but his parents, sister, and brothers NEVER mention him...ever! Adrian and I will be talking about Gabriel right in front of them and they try to change the subject. It breaks my heart that they are taking their dislike of me out on a little innocent baby. Their own kin.
> Another thing I'm sad about, but in a wistful way, is the fact that in 3 weeks my little boy will be here...and not safe and sound inside me. I'll miss his kicks, rolls, and hiccups.



CAMellie, I know your story and have wondered how the family issues will work out. One thing I do know, that a sweet, little baby boy can melt the hardest of hearts and can make friends with just a smile. Give the family time to soften and hopefully change their hearts. * If they do not, you and Adrian can set some limits for their treatment of you based on common courtesy and Christian ethics. * (If you speak or feel badly of a mother, you are involuntarily speaking and meaning bad things about 1/2 of the son.) Good manners and good will toward our family members is a core value of raising good children.


----------



## CleverBomb

Saisha said:


> Wallpaper paste....and the never ending flow of lava over unsettled magma....


The latter can be quite spectacular:
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oowDvy-wtj4"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oowDvy-wtj4[/ame]


----------



## x0emnem0x

"'7th Heaven' Dad Stephen Collins
Confesses on tape to Child Molestation
NYPD Investigating [AUDIO]"

 Childhood ruined.

http://www.tmz.com/2014/10/07/steph...ion-7th-heaven-audio-tape-nypd-investigation/


----------



## Saisha

Everyone is in my prayers....seems like almost everyone I know is going through rough times of it right now....


----------



## Mathias

My grandmother passed away today and I also found out someone I was friends with in high school commited suicide. 2014 has been the worst year of my entire life.


----------



## x0emnem0x

Mathias said:


> My grandmother passed away today and I also found out someone I was friends with in high school commited suicide. 2014 has been the worst year of my entire life.



Sorry to hear that.  In my thoughts. <3


----------



## Saisha

Mathias said:


> My grandmother passed away today and I also found out someone I was friends with in high school commited suicide. 2014 has been the worst year of my entire life.



My deepest condolences and all will be in my prayers....


----------



## Tad

So sorry for you and your family, Mathias.


----------



## CAMellie

Since my water broke on its own I had hoped for a vaginally birth. Alas, it was not to be and the recovery this time around is far worse than my others!


----------



## Sweetie

I'm sorry, but congratulations on your new baby. 


CAMellie said:


> Since my water broke on its own I had hoped for a vaginally birth. Alas, it was not to be and the recovery this time around is far worse than my others!


----------



## Saoirse

Im sorry that Im letting a stupid asshole ruin my weekend. I feel like a pussy for bailing but I really think its best if I dont show up. ugh


----------



## HottiMegan

My brother doesn't realize some of the things he says makes me feel less than and really hurts my feelings. He's a know it all and probably isn't sensitive to my feelings at all. I hate how he seems to pick on my lifestyle. He's a former fatty that is now an ultra marathon runner with an impeccable diet. I'm just the big fat loser with chronic pain.


----------



## CAMellie

I'm sad because I'm missing out on the majority of the joy involved in the first weeks of my beautiful son's life. Because of some horrible bungles made during my c-section, I'm now suffering in a way I would never wish on my very worst enemy!
First, because of a miscommunication between the anaestheseologist (sp) and the charge nurse, my spinal catheter was improperly secured and 1 week after being discharged I was back in the hospital to get a blood patch in my spine. My spinal fluid had been leaking the entire time which caused migraines the likes of which I never knew existed. They pumped me full of IV fluids and morphine then threaded another catheter into my spine and injected 20ccs of my own arterial blood to form a clot to seal the leak.
Then, I went to my regular OB 2 days later for a follow up and found out that I had several abscesses under my incision site because the attending surgeon failed to put in drains - despite direct instructions from my doctor. One of them was the size of a bowling ball. I had assumed it was scar tissue from previous abdominal surgeries...boy was I wrong. I begged my doctor to let me try treating it at home first instead of heading straight to the hospital because I don't want to be away from my son. He reluctantly agreed, put me on 2 different antibiotics and pain killers, and told me what to watch for in case I need to go to the ER.
Well, luck is against me. My incision started weeping yesterday - clear which my doctor said would be normal and to keep everything as dry as possible - but today the liquid is green and bloody and my doctor ORDERED me into the hospital no later than Sunday. He said he expects to see me on his rounds Monday morning.
I'm absolutely devastated! My Gabriel is my world and I don't know how I'm going to be away from him. I mean, I know he'll be loved and very well taken care of...but not by me. I can't stop crying and I've been struggling with panic attacks all damned day!
Thank you for letting me rant. I can't share this anywhere else and it's eating me up.


----------



## Gingembre

CAMellie said:


> I'm absolutely devastated! My Gabriel is my world and I don't know how I'm going to be away from him. I mean, I know he'll be loved and very well taken care of...but not by me. I can't stop crying and I've been struggling with panic attacks all damned day!
> Thank you for letting me rant. I can't share this anywhere else and it's eating me up.



Sorry to hear you're having such a horrible time, CAMellie. It seems a shame Gabriel can't go into the hospital with you. That's what happens where I work, for women that are readmitted to a postnatal ward.


----------



## snuggletiger

Grammy having to live in a facility. I visit everyday and its heartbreaking


----------



## ODFFA

I picked him/her up just outside my sliding door and, after a minute, registered: thaaaat explains the thud I heard this morning :'(

View attachment 20141105_173152.jpg


Sorry, little one. I hope the blow to the head knocked you out instantly. Not that it'll make up for anything, but here, have some posthumous Dims fame.


----------



## Ho Ho Tai

CAMellie said:


> I'm sad because I'm missing out on the majority of the joy involved in the first weeks of my beautiful son's life. Because of some horrible bungles made during my c-section, I'm now suffering in a way I would never wish on my very worst enemy!
> . . .
> Thank you for letting me rant. I can't share this anywhere else and it's eating me up.



. . . but even more, you need a damn good lawyer! Lotsa luck in finding either.


----------



## Deacone

Bruising part.2 of my tattoo healing lol...and it's only getting bigger. Woo for spongey arms.


----------



## littlefairywren

Watching someone with dementia sit beside his dying wife, his hand under her nightgown and resting against her heart as she took her last breaths. Clarity affording him the brief realisation that he was losing his partner of 62 years and that he was now alone. For over an hour he sat like that and it broke my heart. He whispered that he'd loved her all his life and thanked her for being his wife, lover and friend. Goodbye nan.


----------



## Ho Ho Tai

littlefairywren said:


> Watching someone with dementia sit beside his dying wife, his hand under her nightgown and resting against her heart as she took her last breaths. Clarity affording him the brief realisation that he was losing his partner of 62 years and that he was now alone. For over an hour he sat like that and it broke my heart. He whispered that he'd loved her all his life and thanked her for being his wife, lover and friend. Goodbye nan.



littlefairywren -
I am 77 y.o. and, therefore, allowed to think such thoughts and dwell upon an increasingly immediate future.

I think it's appropriate to this reply to direct you to a previous post - especially the Brel song at the end of it.
http://www.dimensionsmagazine.com/forums/showthread.php?p=2093596#post2093596

By the way, to "lover and friend" I would add 'partner'. My wife (Mrs Ho Ho) and I have many symbols that have come into our lives over the years but one of the first (and most important) is 'PFL' - 'Partners, Friends and Lovers'. The letters PFL describe the order of states in our relationship and is engraved on our wedding rings.


----------



## Ruffie

My heart goes out to you littlefairywren *hugs*


----------



## Tad

Reading that on a little smart phone screen had me in tears this morning. How you are feeling, from living it, I can barely imagine. My heart goes out to you and all of your family--there was so much love and so much loss right there. (and I have to stop typing or I'll be sobbing again)


----------



## x0emnem0x

So, this happened yesterday, but the pic of the dead bird reminded me and made me sad. I went outside yesterday to leave and somehow a bird decided the best idea of somewhere to go would be to fly directly into my house. Next thing I see is this bird darting around the room, goes to one window, thud, still flapping, trying to get it outside before it ends up hurting itself, darts to the other window, thud, no noise or movement. I look over to go get it and it's not moving, just laid there. I moved it outside and waited a minute hoping it might get back up, but alas, it killed itself.


----------



## Saoirse

Birds smack into windows at my house regularly. some die, most just get messed up for a few minutes. theyve also flown down the chimney and into the house.


----------



## moore2me

I have a few suggestions to cut down on the number of birds trying to fly through our home windows. (Both of them are low cost fixes . . .)

Place some peel off gel characters on the windows where the crashes are happening, These gel characters can be found in discount stores where child's toys are sold. This time of year you can also find gel characters in the Christmas decorations. You place the characters on the inside of your window, but birds can see them there and know the space the window occupies is solid.

Another item can work to keep birds "scared" away from your window - rubber snakes. You can buy check rubber snakes from a discount store and hang the snakes at the edges of the offending windows, Or, if your window has a substantial sill, lay the fake snakes on this inside sill. Snakes are natural predators of birds and these fake "snake scare-crows" take advantage of a natural fear in small birds of snakes. (However, as the size of birds increase, the feathered warriors become predators of snakes. Examples of this are eagles, hawks, vultures, crows, etc,)


----------



## spiritangel

This Year has been one of Loss

I lost my Stepfather and My Nanna

and too many friends to count have lots Mothers and fathers 

there is so much grief and sadness and I always feel like I do not have the right words to help lift it even briefly


----------



## Yakatori

moore2me said:


> "_Place some peel off gel characters on the windows where the crashes are happening, These gel characters can be found in discount stores where child's toys are sold._"


Seriously? I always assumed those were mainly just for humans. Although, it's not like this is an everyday event for me; but, then again, for me, it just seems to only happen when I'm sitting, eating, & talking with someone in front of a huge, shiny-clean sliding glass door looking out onto the clear afternoon sun. Then, as if out of nowhere, *WHAM!!*.

I dunno. I dunno if hanging a plastic snake would quite fit with the rest of the decor. Which reminds me:

The very first thing that's next worse than that is, in the summer time, when I use this two-wheeled heavy-line trimmer to clear the brush in an overgrown field I have to maintain. Because; it's kind of a time-consuming job the way I have to do it, but I start around the perimeter-edge, where most of rocks and uneven terrain would seem to preclude using just a regular lawn-mower. (Whereas, at least some of the middle part can be more easily cut with this old lawn-tractor, if I can get it running.) So, just to keep ahead of it, I always try to do bit here and there, starting from wherever I left off and working my way toward the middle, ambling in this once giant circle that progressively gets smaller and smaller.

But, doing this, whatever wildlife I encounter (crickets and frogs and toads and, curiously, lots of snakes) tend to flee in the opposite direction of whichever side it seems like I'm coming from. Not realizing, obviously, that's where I'm soon-headed. And also, of course, that it takes me however long to complete this substantial loop (of Death!).

The snakes, however, are the worst. Because, with the bugs and amphibians, they just seem to spring out of the air no sooner than I approach with the machine, so I can't really quite tell if they're actually getting hit or just instinctively jumping out of the way, feeling what must be an immense sense of vibration . But the snakes....something about the perverse (in?)compatibility of snakes' elongated form and the swinging action of this beaded, reinforced line...means that every snake-encounter works out to be this both awkwardly painful and painfully-awkward dance of a mutal-_Oh-*shit*! Uh, just wtf are *you *doing here!? Do you *really* have to be right-*here*, of just about everywhere else in this gigantic field?!_

And, repeated. Continuously. Every ten minutes or so until either I finish down to the very last strip of grass or, somehow, the snake escapes.
Every summer. And its, like, the very same snake; or, maybe, family of snakes? So, it would seem.


----------



## Pixelpops

I'm sad because my chest hurts when I breathe in, but I don't want to go to a doctor because the only thing he'll say is 'lose weight'. 

I swear, I could have an arrow in my head in a clichéd and hilarious accident, leaking brains out of my ear and he'd still blame my fat...


----------



## Yakatori

moore2me said:


> "_Place some peel off gel characters on the windows where the crashes are happening, These gel characters can be found in discount stores where child's toys are sold._"


Seriously? I always assumed those were mainly just for humans. Although, it's not like this is an everyday event for me; but, then again, for me, it just seems to only happen when I'm sitting, eating, & talking with someone in front of a huge, shiny-clean sliding glass door looking out onto the clear afternoon sun. Then, as if out of nowhere, *WHAM!!*.

I dunno. I dunno if hanging a plastic snake would quite fit with the rest of the decor. Which reminds me:

The very first thing that's next worse than that is, in the summer time, when I use this two-wheeled heavy-line trimmer to clear the brush in an overgrown field I have to maintain. Because; it's kind of a time-consuming job the way I have to do it, but I start around the perimeter-edge, where most of rocks and uneven terrain would seem to preclude using just a regular lawn-mower. (Whereas, at least some of the middle part can be more easily cut with this old lawn-tractor, if I can get it running.) So, just to keep ahead of it, I always try to do bit here and there, starting from wherever I left off and working my way toward the middle, ambling in this once giant circle that progressively gets smaller and smaller.

But, doing this, whatever wildlife I encounter (crickets and frogs and toads and, curiously, lots of snakes) tend to flee in the opposite direction of whichever side it seems like I'm coming from. Not realizing, obviously, that's where I'm soon-headed. And also, of course, that it takes me however long to complete this substantial loop (of Death!).

The snakes, however, are the worst. Because, with the bugs and amphibians, they just seem to spring out of the air no sooner than I approach with the machine, so I can't really quite tell if they're actually getting hit or just instinctively jumping out of the way, feeling what must be an immense sense of vibration . But the snakes....something about the perverse (in?)compatibility of snakes' elongated form and the swinging action of this beaded, reinforced line...means that every snake-encounter works out to be this both awkwardly painful and painfully-awkward dance of a mutal-_Oh-*shit*! Uh, just wtf are *you *doing here!? Do you *really* have to be right-*here*, of just about everywhere else in this gigantic field?!_

And, repeated. Continuously. Every ten minutes or so until either I finish down to the very last strip of grass or, somehow, the snake escapes.
Every summer. And its, like, the very same snake; or, maybe, family of snakes? So, it would seem.


----------



## lille

The window clings do work really well, I put them on a bunch of our windows as a kid because we had one summer where there was a bird hitting a window almost every week. Once the window clings were up there were no more injured birdies. Yakatori, I remember being a kid and walking a few fee in front of my dad as he would mow the lawn; he'd mow and I'd scare all the frogs out of the way.


----------



## Ho Ho Tai

ODFFA said:


> I picked him/her up just outside my sliding door and, after a minute, registered: thaaaat explains the thud I heard this morning :
> 
> Sorry, little one. I hope the blow to the head knocked you out instantly. Not that it'll make up for anything, but here, have some posthumous Dims fame.


 
Reading to the end of this thread, I had no idea how many bird watchers / lovers there were at Dimensions.

You might enjoy reading Laura Erickson's blog. She has become a national figure in the birding scene. We both lived in Duluth, MN for some years. She led bird watching expeditions and wrote, wrote, wrote. I sometimes attached myself to the expeditions, seeing fewer birds than I saw glimpses of her famous red stocking cap, bobbing along in the woods far ahead of me.

She is probably best known outside the birding community for a book she wrote in 1993, "For the Birds", a day book we have given to many. 

After spending some years at the Cornell Lab. of Ornithology she and her husband are back in Duluth. She still writes and maintains a 'blog which I receive by e-mail. Recently, she has become very concerned about the acres of glass in Vikings Stadium, currently under construction. The link will take you to a 'blog entry on this topic.

The entire 'blog can be accessed here. By scrolling down, you can find a link for subscription to her daily 'blog entries. For anyone with any fondness for birds, these are like peanuts. I defy you to read just one.

I think you can find her e-mail link in there also. I don't feel at liberty to make it available in this post.


----------



## penguin

I think it will take a while before I stop feeling stupid and unlovable.


----------



## littlefairywren

On Saturday a family friend passed away unexpectedly. So much grief at the moment.


----------



## spookytwigg

My little rat Douglas Adams has died. I'm absolutely gutted.


----------



## Sushi

spookytwigg said:


> My little rat Douglas Adams has died. I'm absolutely gutted.



I'm so sorry for your loss. These little creatures do become so important to our lives. My dog Skippy passed away last year (October) and not a day goes by that I don't miss him. R.I.P. Douglas Adams.


----------



## Deacone

spookytwigg said:


> My little rat Douglas Adams has died. I'm absolutely gutted.



Oh noooooo I'm sorry to hear that  x RIP


----------



## spookytwigg

Thanks for the RIPs guys. I was already having a grim day cause I'd had a serious attack of depression earlier on the day. Don't know if my subconscious was just aware that something horrible had happened.


----------



## TwilightStarr

Tonight I saw someone who I've known for the past 15 years and has always been a good friend. We we're never best friends or anything, but he meant a lot to me.
We never see each other anymore but I spent almost every weekend of my late teens/early 20s hanging out with him.
Tonight I saw him out at a store and he avoided me  Didn't look my way, didn't say Hi, nothing.
At first I figured it was because he hadn't seen me and I was on the other side of the store looking at DVD's with my nephew and it's not a big store, but there were people and a few aisles between us.
A few minutes later I turn around and he is at the front of the store, right behind me. So I said Hi to him and he didn't even say Hi. He just said some stupid remark about the prices being to high and that's it!! 
Didn't come give me a hug, didn't say anything else, nothing!! He has never been like that towards me. I know he can be a dick to a lot of people but he's never been like that to me.
It just upset me so much  and then I cried :really sad:
If you upset me so bad that I cry in public, I will quickly go from upset to angry  :really sad:


----------



## wrenchboy

2 things. 
That my ex wife hates me so much that she is telling my 14 yo son lies so he does not want anything to do with me. And there is nothing that I can do about it. 
As I travel across the country I see so many small towns that look like they used to thrive but now they are beatup, in disrepair, and generally deserted while all the big chains build more and more .


----------



## HottiMegan

I am a total and utter failure. It hurts to keep being reminded of it.


----------



## moore2me

HottiMegan said:


> I am a total and utter failure. It hurts to keep being reminded of it.


 

HottiMegan, I just now read your post from a few days ago. I believe you need some professional help with what's going on in your head and in your life. If you are taking medications for mood or anxiety, etc. I fear they are not working as they should. A doctor needs to deal with this and you need counseling by a medical doctor. 

I know you & your family have been up and down this road before - but this is different - this time you are the one in need. If you were sick with a fever and broken out in spots all over wouldn't you get help? If you suddenly stopped seeing wouldn't you immediately go to a hospital? If everyone in the room is watching a TV show and the picture and sound are normal - but you cannot see any colors and cannot understand the language, would you suspect something is wrong with your sight and hearing or processing?

A valuable, vivid, beautiful and loving mom like yourself is worth everything you can do to get help - as a wise person once said - you are worth more than rubies or diamonds.


----------



## Gingembre

moore2me said:


> HottiMegan, I just now read your post from a few days ago. I believe you need some professional help with what's going on in your head and in your life. If you are taking medications for mood or anxiety, etc. I fear they are not working as they should. A doctor needs to deal with this and you need counseling by a medical doctor.
> 
> I know you & your family have been up and down this road before - but this is different - this time you are the one in need. If you were sick with a fever and broken out in spots all over wouldn't you get help? If you suddenly stopped seeing wouldn't you immediately go to a hospital? If everyone in the room is watching a TV show and the picture and sound are normal - but you cannot see any colors and cannot understand the language, would you suspect something is wrong with your sight and hearing or processing?
> 
> A valuable, vivid, beautiful and loving mom like yourself is worth everything you can do to get help - as a wise person once said - you are worth more than rubies or diamonds.




I completely agree.


----------



## Saoirse

A person I love is moving away tomorrow morning. I get to see him a bit today, but only to pick him up, since he's borrowing my Jeep while Im at work. I'll see him again tonight, but just to bring him home.

We've had the craziest relationship. We met through friends, started texting, met a few days later. I fell hard. He's intelligent and witty, super handsome and when he's in the lovin mood, its impossible to say no thanks. He's definitely the most adventurous sex partner I've ever had. We did it all over this damn county and it was fun!

But we were never a couple. I told him I loved him and there was a short time where he would say it back, but he never wanted a girlfriend. It made me angry. So we fought a lot and then we would stop talking for a few days. One of us would text the other and we would go on from there, only to have a week of happiness before one of us got pissed about something.

My friends and family dont like him. He's done some pretty fucked up things to me, but Im no angel. I hurt him just as much. It was our cycle and we never broke out of it, even though we both desperately wanted it.

Now he's leaving the state. He hasn't told me where or why, and I don't actually want to know. I think having him disappear will be the most helpful. It will be good to have someone who brings me down, out of my life, but I can't help but cry over all this. We really could've made something special together but it was like the Universe was denying us that chance.

He says he'll still come around. He'll still come visit his family and we can get together, but I dont think he realizes how much traveling I will be doing this coming spring/summer, for my new job. I may not see him at all in the next year. 

Im trying to keep positive. This means changes for me too. No more fighting, no more hurting, no more hiding things from other people I love, who don't approve. But its pretty difficult, knowing he wont be around to make me laugh when I've had a bad day at work.

Just feels shitty.


----------



## Saoirse

^^^ reading all that again is making me cry at work. 


Also I was reminded that tomorrow is my friend/coworker's last day. She's moving to the Virgin Island at the end of the month. Im super happy for her, she's soooo looking forward to something new, but Im going to miss her so much.


----------



## Surlysomething

Even if it's for the best it still hurts. Probably almost more because you tried so hard.
Be kind to yourself. Cry it out. Do something nice for yourself.


It will be better before you know it.

-hug-




Saoirse said:


> A person I love is moving away tomorrow morning. I get to see him a bit today, but only to pick him up, since he's borrowing my Jeep while Im at work. I'll see him again tonight, but just to bring him home.
> 
> We've had the craziest relationship. We met through friends, started texting, met a few days later. I fell hard. He's intelligent and witty, super handsome and when he's in the lovin mood, its impossible to say no thanks. He's definitely the most adventurous sex partner I've ever had. We did it all over this damn county and it was fun!
> 
> But we were never a couple. I told him I loved him and there was a short time where he would say it back, but he never wanted a girlfriend. It made me angry. So we fought a lot and then we would stop talking for a few days. One of us would text the other and we would go on from there, only to have a week of happiness before one of us got pissed about something.
> 
> My friends and family dont like him. He's done some pretty fucked up things to me, but Im no angel. I hurt him just as much. It was our cycle and we never broke out of it, even though we both desperately wanted it.
> 
> Now he's leaving the state. He hasn't told me where or why, and I don't actually want to know. I think having him disappear will be the most helpful. It will be good to have someone who brings me down, out of my life, but I can't help but cry over all this. We really could've made something special together but it was like the Universe was denying us that chance.
> 
> He says he'll still come around. He'll still come visit his family and we can get together, but I dont think he realizes how much traveling I will be doing this coming spring/summer, for my new job. I may not see him at all in the next year.
> 
> Im trying to keep positive. This means changes for me too. No more fighting, no more hurting, no more hiding things from other people I love, who don't approve. But its pretty difficult, knowing he wont be around to make me laugh when I've had a bad day at work.
> 
> Just feels shitty.


----------



## Aust99

A colleague and friend passed away after a short illness.... Absolutely shocked and completely saddened. Cancer can get fucked!!!


----------



## Gingembre

Aust99 said:


> A colleague and friend passed away after a short illness.... Absolutely shocked and completely saddened. Cancer can get fucked!!!



Sorry for your loss, Nat  (((hugs)))


----------



## Aust99

Thanks L. Went to her funeral today. Was beautiful.


----------



## Saoirse

That last time we saw eachother, we hugged tight and said goodbye without crying. He said he'd done enough tearing up that day and getting all sad about it made it seem like we would never see each other ever again. He was right of course, he was always right. I asked him to text me when he got there, so I knew he was safe.

I know he's there, Im assuming he's safe... but he never texted. We haven't talked since that last night. Its breaking my heart. 

He just made me prove that its possible to cry during a Steppenwolf song. asshole.


----------



## Tracyarts

I have to be vague about this, and I'm sorry about that. 

But somebody close to me is in a pretty serious situation right now. There isn't much I can do to help them at the moment. I've done the little bit that I can. I just have to wait for them to get back to me and let me know what they need and I will do as much of it as I am capable of. But I have limitations. 

My husband is completely overwhelmed with his workload right now and has already committed to help his parents with their move into their new home. He doesn't have the time nor the mental energy to help me deal with my friend's problem. Circumstances are such that I have to be discreet with their situation, so I can't just confide in anybody who will listen. I'm pretty much dealing with this on my own. 

I feel really helpless and afraid for my friend. It's all a waiting game now until I find out what they need and see how much of it I can help them with. Hopefully tomorrow or Wednesday at the latest I will know where things stand and start helping them work on a plan.


----------



## penguin

Missing and worrying about someone who means a lot to me, knowing I can't help them. Even if I could, I'm not sure they'd want me to help.


----------



## Surlysomething

My sister that lives in Toronto won't be able to make it home for Christmas.

I feel a bit verklempt about that this morning.


----------



## Sushi

I lost two people this year that I thought loved and cared for me but didn't. Yet I still wish that I could be celebrating Christmas with them. I miss what I thought I had. The town I live in is in the middle of a horrible storm of protest and mourning of the murder of two police officers. I wonder if there's ever going to be a day that I don't wake up to horrible news and people being mean and feeling like I can never trust anyone ever again.


----------



## Allie Cat

Another Christmas without my family. Thankfully, I did get to spend it with my boyfriend and my non-romantic life partner/sister from another mister... but it still didn't really feel like Christmas. For some reason, it bothers me greatly when the traditions I am used to in my life are discarded.

I've avoided speaking to my mom's ex-girlfriend Carol for about half a year, after she posted an article in support of 'women-born-women'-only spaces on Facebook. The betrayal I felt from her was incredibly painful, she has been a part of my life since I was fifteen years old. Today she texted me asking my address, and I felt obliged to tell her why I was not comfortable giving that to her. She wants to talk to me tomorrow on the phone. I am terrified. I don't think she will understand why what she said was offensive and hurtful.

I am a very fragile, broken person, and I feel like I'm walking on a razor's edge. The presence of a hostile influence like that could push me off. If I do not succeed in educating her, I do not think I can keep her in my life. But losing her for good will hurt almost as much as allowing her to stay.


----------



## Lamia

I am feeling sad, even though I had a lovely Christmas. I am just missing my grandparents and my cousins that have passed and just the thought of getting older and losing more people and that if God Forbid I live long enough I will eventually be alone on Christmas, since I decided not to have children

I decided to sing a Christmas song to all of my family and I got so upset and melancholy that I broke down crying in the middle. I did it over, but I am still teary eyed and sad. 

Have yourself a Merry Little Christmas is really a bittersweet song. I hope it touches you and in our shared sadness we find solace. 

https://www.youtube.com/edit?video_id=Sya4EHlYz6g


----------



## Lamia

Alicia Rose said:


> Another Christmas without my family. Thankfully, I did get to spend it with my boyfriend and my non-romantic life partner/sister from another mister... but it still didn't really feel like Christmas. For some reason, it bothers me greatly when the traditions I am used to in my life are discarded.
> 
> I've avoided speaking to my mom's ex-girlfriend Carol for about half a year, after she posted an article in support of 'women-born-women'-only spaces on Facebook. The betrayal I felt from her was incredibly painful, she has been a part of my life since I was fifteen years old. Today she texted me asking my address, and I felt obliged to tell her why I was not comfortable giving that to her. She wants to talk to me tomorrow on the phone. I am terrified. I don't think she will understand why what she said was offensive and hurtful.
> 
> I am a very fragile, broken person, and I feel like I'm walking on a razor's edge. The presence of a hostile influence like that could push me off. If I do not succeed in educating her, I do not think I can keep her in my life. But losing her for good will hurt almost as much as allowing her to stay.



Hopefully you will be surprised that when someone loves you they sometimes can change their beliefs and become enlightened..I wish you the best.


----------



## spookytwigg

My depression is coming on in fairly strong waves at the moment and it's making it really hard to want to go outside or do anything. To make things more fun I now have a vicious cold too. I'm gonna go and pass out for a few days I think.


----------



## penguin

My daughter is currently in the middle of spending three weeks with her dad, who lives in another state. We talk on the phone Wednesdays and Fridays, and skype on Sundays. Tonight she told me how they're going camping next week, from Monday - Thursday, which I know she loves. There's no mobile reception where they go, so our Wednesday chat is out, which I can handle. But Tuesday is my birthday and we would've had an extra call then. I told her she can wish me a happy birthday on skype this Sunday, but not being able to talk to her _on_ my birthday makes me sad. I am planning on spending as much of next week completely alone now my flatmate has finished his holidays, but I still wanted to talk to her then


----------



## Saoirse

My best friend just told me he's letting go of his cat today. That poor kitty. He's had a good long life and my bestie loves that cat more than anything, but he's soooo sick and thin and frail. He became very sick about 6 months ago and my bestie and his boyfriend spent a lot of money having tests done and trying all sorts of meds. I dont remember what the issue was (I believe he had some sort of growth on his spine that was inoperable, but there might've been more issues than that). They got him on some steroidal meds and he bounced back for a bit but was never 100%. And within the past month his weight decreased drastically and a few days ago he stopped eating completely.

losing a pet is soooo hard.


----------



## Saoirse

Ran into a friend today and I haven't seen him in a while so we were catching up. I feel so bad for him. 

He has 2 kids, but hasn't been with their mother for a few years. She is an addict and was unfit to have custody of her children, so he has them for the majority of the time. She (and her wealthy family) are bringing him to court over child support. She has those kids 2 days a week and wants child support from HIM!! So now he has to come up with $3k for his lawyer to tell this bitch where to stick it. And on top of it, his job let him go cause there was no work, but they've been dicking him around with unemployment pay. Luckily he found another job, but he's still owed money.

This guy definitely has his own demons, but those kids are well taken care of. He busts his ass to make sure they have clothes, food and a warm home. He's an excellent father and I love watching him with his kids. There is so much love in that family!

It just makes me cry, thinking about this shitty situation. I pray it gets resolved quickly.


----------



## TwilightStarr

I've been to the ER 4 times the past 2 weeks, because my normal panic attacks have kicked into overdrive and have had me convinced I am dying  
So now I am on some new meds and trying to get my life back in control but it's a hard fight!!


----------



## Surlysomething

I'm sorry to hear you're struggling but i'm glad you've been reaching out for help. Be kind to yourself and remember _this too shall pass_...-hug-



TwilightStarr said:


> I've been to the ER 4 times the past 2 weeks, because my normal panic attacks have kicked into overdrive and have had me convinced I am dying
> So now I am on some new meds and trying to get my life back in control but it's a hard fight!!


----------



## TwilightStarr

Surlysomething said:


> I'm sorry to hear you're struggling but i'm glad you've been reaching out for help. Be kind to yourself and remember _this too shall pass_...-hug-




Thanks  I know I will survive and make it through this, but it is such a hard fight


----------



## CastingPearls

My father has pneumonia.


----------



## moore2me

CastingPearls said:


> My father has pneumonia.


 
Casting Pearls, I am sorry to hear this. It's a bad time of year for respiratory problems, plus the load from the flu. Is he in the hospital?

Are you able to go see him or talk on the phone? You and dad will be in my prayers. M2M


----------



## mermaid8

My ex boyfriend is moving in with his new girlfriend. They have only been dating four and half months and we have only been broken up six and half months. We dated for three and half years and nine weeks after dumping me he was already seeing a new girl and by October they were in an official relationship ( damm you stupid Facebook for allowing me to see this info). I just don't know how someone can move on that fast and what does it say about the relationship we had together. How special was it, if after dating a girl for 4 1/2 months he can move in with her? 

I know that there are worse things happening in the world and I should just get over myself, but I'm just so hurt. I've had breakups before but this time I just don't know if I had handle anymore rejection and believe a man when he says he accepts me. I'm tired of putting on a brave face then going to bed at night and crying in the dark because I'm just so hurt and at a loss for direction.


----------



## CleverBomb

mermaid8 said:


> I just don't know how someone can move on that fast* and what does it say about the relationship we had together*. How special was it, if after dating a girl for 4 1/2 months he can move in with her?


You spoiled him and he got desperate to re-create what he finally realized he lost?


----------



## Lamia

mermaid8 said:


> My ex boyfriend is moving in with his new girlfriend. They have only been dating four and half months and we have only been broken up six and half months. We dated for three and half years and nine weeks after dumping me he was already seeing a new girl and by October they were in an official relationship ( damm you stupid Facebook for allowing me to see this info). I just don't know how someone can move on that fast and what does it say about the relationship we had together. How special was it, if after dating a girl for 4 1/2 months he can move in with her?
> 
> I know that there are worse things happening in the world and I should just get over myself, but I'm just so hurt. I've had breakups before but this time I just don't know if I had handle anymore rejection and believe a man when he says he accepts me. I'm tired of putting on a brave face then going to bed at night and crying in the dark because I'm just so hurt and at a loss for direction.



My dad's wife of 25 years died in March. He was in a new relationship by June. She moved into house in August. Some men and women just can't stand being alone and have to be in a relationship. Try not to be too sad. You could also say that maybe if he can move on that quick that it's a good thing you didn't waste anymore time with him.


----------



## mermaid8

Lamia said:


> My dad's wife of 25 years died in March. He was in a new relationship by June. She moved into house in August. Some men and women just can't stand being alone and have to be in a relationship. Try not to be too sad. You could also say that maybe if he can move on that quick that it's a good thing you didn't waste anymore time with him.



I know it's better than I found out now than years from now, but it still makes me question how much he really loved me if I was so easy to get over. 

I just want to stop feeling sad about the whole thing. It sucks because just when I think I'm past it something happens or a thought occurs me about the whole thing and I'm back feeling sad and crummy.


----------



## mermaid8

CleverBomb said:


> You spoiled him and he got desperate to re-create what he finally realized he lost?



Excellent point! I have had that same thought just yesterday. This new isn't going to do half the stuff I did for him.


----------



## Iannathedriveress

I got laid off from a job for being too slow to do the work.


----------



## mermaid8

My best girlfriend just told me that she's finally getting the dream full-time job she's always wanted and of course I told her it was awesome and I was so happy for her and I really do mean it, but a part of me feels envious and worse about my life. I feel terrible for feeling this way. It's selfish considering all the times she has been there for me as a true friend. 

It's awful that her happiness makes me feel worse about my life. I guess a part of me feels alone like we were both in the same boat but now I'm alone in this crappy confused boat. All I keep thinking is if she gets a relationship on top of the new job I'm going to be happy for her but I'm really going to be all alone. It's terrible that this is the way I'm feeling.


----------



## x0emnem0x

Having been excited for my doctor appointment (which is in March) for months due to hopefully being able to get the help with my depression/anxiety that I need. Looking forward to change because I have been miserable for so long. Then I got a call the other day saying that now that doctor was going to be out of town and I'd have to reschedule. My mom had the same call and they pushed her appointment back at least another month and she was already a patient with her - I have a new patient appointment so this process is probably going to take even longer... and it just sucks because as much as I am excited to get help, it is disheartening to just not have it done already and I've had to wait 3 months so far for a new patient appointment. Just sucks... Trying to be thankful I have the option to go anyway but the waiting game gets old.


----------



## x0emnem0x

Moving out of this house soon is just so unreal.


----------



## Victoria08

I received a voice message from my brother asking me to move back to England so I can be closer to him. He's never been particularly affectionate, so this just came out of the blue. And it makes me realize just how much I miss him too


----------



## Deacone

Yesterday I fell over (My ankle twisted because I stepped in a pothole in the pavement) - I landed with all of my weight on my knee  

I spent until 1am in A&E, and then (because the only other person who can open up shop is on a flight to Antigua right now for their holiday) I had to go into work for 6am. So I've been hobbling around (Nothing is broke, but it still frigging hurts) all day doing delivery in my shop. Went home to at 2:30 to have a catnap...woke up at 6pm. My college course starts at 6pm...FUCK! So I break a few speed limits by driving there and manage to get there and only miss out on 30 mins of the class. 

Now I've eaten too much chinese takeaway and my stomach is fighting for space against my lungs lol

It's been a messy 24 hours.


----------



## Saoirse

Deacone said:


> Yesterday I fell over (My ankle twisted because I stepped in a pothole in the pavement) - I landed with all of my weight on my knee



Hope your knee feels better!! I slipped on ice and busted up one knee last month and just last week I tripped over my own feet and busted up the other knee! Try to rest it as much as possible!


----------



## Deacone

Saoirse said:


> Hope your knee feels better!! I slipped on ice and busted up one knee last month and just last week I tripped over my own feet and busted up the other knee! Try to rest it as much as possible!




Thank you! It's really annoying, cos I've twisted my right ankle, but my left knee. And they both hurt equally. So I'm struggling to find a middle ground in how much weight i put on either >_<


----------



## Tracyarts

I was thinking about a woman I used to be friends with and decided to look her up and maybe make contact with her since we didn't have a falling out or part on bad terms or anything like that. 

And the first thing that popped up when I searched her name was her obituary, she passed away a year ago. 

Damn. 

She's the fourth person from my old circle of friends to die. Now I'm scared to try and look up any others because it's just too much death.


----------



## TwilightStarr

Tracyarts said:


> I was thinking about a woman I used to be friends with and decided to look her up and maybe make contact with her since we didn't have a falling out or part on bad terms or anything like that.
> 
> And the first thing that popped up when I searched her name was her obituary, she passed away a year ago.
> 
> Damn.
> 
> She's the fourth person from my old circle of friends to die. Now I'm scared to try and look up any others because it's just too much death.



I'm so sorry


----------



## mermaid8

People who live in glass houses yet like to throw stones at others. What gives people the right to judge my life when their life is just a messed up. Ahhhhh!!!! I'm so absolutely tired with the hipocrosy in my family like really, you going to comment about my life because why your the authority on what is right and what is wrong? Who made you judge and jury? Who gave you the right to comment on my life? I'm 32 freaking years old, I'm not a little kid anymore my life is my business so butt the heck out. 

I just can't take the judgemental comments. I'm just so beyond tired. ;((


----------



## Steve O

My beautiful wife of almost 14 yrs died on Feb 4, after a long courageous battle with cancer. God rest her soul and give me strength.


----------



## Gingembre

Steve O said:


> My beautiful wife of almost 14 yrs died on Feb 4, after a long courageous battle with cancer. God rest her soul and give me strength.



I am sorry for your loss.


----------



## mermaid8

I wish there was someone in my life I could talk to about my feelings and thoughts because since my breakup nine months ago I've had to start hiding what I feel and think, again. And, I have to say it's been mentally and physically exhausting. 

I feel so isolated from everyone. I'm so ashamed of the thoughts and feelings that I have everyday that if anyone knew they would run the other way.


----------



## Ho Ho Tai

Steve O said:


> My beautiful wife of almost 14 yrs died on Feb 4, after a long courageous battle with cancer. God rest her soul and give me strength.



Steve -
May I direct you to this previous post? I couldn't put any more into my rep message.
http://www.dimensionsmagazine.com/forums/showthread.php?p=2093596&highlight=silver+clock#post2093596


----------



## lostinadaydream

I'm very sad to see that, among many other beautiful fat women, the formerly beautiful gaining and sexy Pauline Potter is participating at the 600lb Life freakshow. 

Nontheless there are some nice captures which show her in an even heavier state. Too sad that she didn't share her heavier Beauty with her fans and supporters.


----------



## 1love_emily

What's making me sad is that I'm too damn stupid to finish my fucking geology homework. 

Let's play "Guess where Emily gets frustrated and fed up in answering a question!"

Question: "In your own words, explain what happens at the atomic level to cause mineral precipitation. You may draw on examples used in class, in the readings, and/ or other ideas that you have."

Answer: "Mineral precitipation is the formation of a solid mineral from a liquid, when the liquid solution has so many mineral ions, that the saturation level is met and surpassed. Then the atoms just stop fucking being watr and start being some fucking bullshit mineral"


----------



## CleverBomb

Fucking magma, how do they work?

Yeah, I know you're discussing mineral precipitation from a solution, typically water. Just remember, if you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.


----------



## NancyGirl74

Thought I had let you go...until you let me go. And that hurts a bit more than expected. Just goes to show that while something may not be right it doesn't mean it didn't matter. It did...to me it did so very much. Thank you for that, for mattering.


----------



## mermaid8

Memories of us haunt me daily like ghosts that circle my mind over and over again. These memories kill me. Remembering what it felt like to kiss you and be cuddled by you come to me when it's quiet and dark outside.


----------



## lostinadaydream

mermaid8 said:


> Memories of us haunt me daily like ghosts that circle my mind over and over again. These memories kill me. Remembering what it felt like to kiss you and be cuddled by you come to me when it's quiet and dark outside.



I know that feelings very well, too...


----------



## mermaid8

A friend I thought was out of my life has now decided he wants to be friends again. I'm tired of the back and forth treatment he has done to me. I mean how many times does he expect me to forgive him and in the process trust that I can rely on him for support. :/ I'm just so tired and so confused about this whole thing. I used to trust him with my darkest feelings but now I just don't know what to do.


----------



## Saoirse

Mu fuckbuddy was proudly showing off the ivory grips he bought for one of his hand guns. 

Its his money, he bought them legally and he didnt kill an elephant or rhino. But he just indirectly contributed to the slaughter of thousands of elephants. I told him it upset me and he seemed to understand, but he really likes how they look.

sigh


----------



## Ruffie

My mother died after battling cancer. I am sad and overwhelmed with all there is to do. Being an only child sucks sometimes, but thankful for good friends and my family who are helping me out. 

View attachment 101_0469.jpg


----------



## Surlysomething

I'm so sorry for your loss. I know you've had so much to deal with these last few years and it's tough and tiring. The look on your Mom's face says how much she adored you though. There's no hurry to do everything. 

Don't forget to take some time for yourself. -hug-





Ruffie said:


> My mother died after battling cancer. I am sad and overwhelmed with all there is to do. Being an only child sucks sometimes, but thankful for good friends and my family who are helping me out.


----------



## Ruffie

Thank you girl. Just dealing with what HAS to be done right now. Got the funeral arrangements done and most of her room cleaned out at the home. ONe more load to haul from there and meeting with the minister tonight for the service planning and then funeral Friday. Checking things off one at a time.


----------



## Surlysomething

That's all you can do. Make another pot of coffee, take a nap when you can.

Wow, you two sure look alike. 



Ruffie said:


> Thank you girl. Just dealing with what HAS to be done right now. Got the funeral arrangements done and most of her room cleaned out at the home. ONe more load to haul from there and meeting with the minister tonight for the service planning and then funeral Friday. Checking things off one at a time.


----------



## Ruffie

Yes we do. Mom always used to say you may look like me but you act like your father. LOL Thank you for always lending an ear and supporting me. So appreciated!


----------



## Tad

So sorry for your loss, Ruffie. Wishing you strength to get through these next few days of "must do right away," then some more peaceful time to let you feel and reflect and mourn.


----------



## Ruffie

Thank you Tad. I am indeed feeling a little numb at this point. But as you said once the busyness dies down I can have the time to fully process and feel.


----------



## Surlysomething

Us Canadians have to stick together. 
My Mom was born in Saskatchewan! My Dad was born in Flin Flon. Haha


Take care.



Ruffie said:


> Yes we do. Mom always used to say you may look like me but you act like your father. LOL Thank you for always lending an ear and supporting me. So appreciated!


----------



## littlefairywren

Ruffie said:


> My mother died after battling cancer. I am sad and overwhelmed with all there is to do. Being an only child sucks sometimes, but thankful for good friends and my family who are helping me out.



I am so sorry for the loss of your mother, Ruffie. Gentle, wee hugs.


----------



## Ruffie

Thank you for the wee hug


----------



## mermaid8

I know my problems and feelings are trivial compared to the truly serious ones that other people experience, but lately I've just been so emotionally isolated. I want someone that I can talk to about my feelings even the dark ones. I have a few friends and I tell them some stuff but I never been comfortable sharing my feelings. In the past I've been rejected because of my feelings. Again I know my problems are petty and small but I just have someone in my life that I could be my whole self around and not fear judgement and rejection.


----------



## Rojodi

I had my first cancer scare yesterday.

If a doctor tells you to have a colonoscopy, DO IT! It saves lives!


----------



## TwilightStarr

Ruffie said:


> My mother died after battling cancer. I am sad and overwhelmed with all there is to do. Being an only child sucks sometimes, but thankful for good friends and my family who are helping me out.



I am so sorry for your loss


----------



## mermaid8

I'm so tired of never being trusted with my sister's children. I'm not incompetent, I have taken care of children before and I have a first aid license. Ahhhhh....I'm just so angry that I'm always seen untrustworthy or a stupid fool by my sister when she has no reason to leave this way. And, of course my mother always defends my sister and her husband and never sees my point of view. I'm always wrong and I always have to bury my feelings.


----------



## mermaid8

;((((( I just realized I have no one that I'm completely alone. When I need to talk to someone I have no one to turn to for comfort or counsel. I'm totally utterly completely without a single person who can truly be here for me. ;((((


----------



## interesting monster

I'm sad that I can't talk to you


----------



## WTF

My county has been in the news a lot lately- shootings (the most recent one had a young man die), drug raids and a would-be terrorist arrested... but this story broke out yesterday and I cant stop thinking about it...

Pittsfield Police Investigating Murder-Suicide

A father killed his 11 yr old daughter and then himself.

My daddy is the #1 man in my life. My daddy will always be my protector. My daddy will always make sure I am safe. I trust my daddy with my life.

Did this girl trust her daddy? Did he tell her everything would be ok and that she was safe?

I cant stop crying.


----------



## Rojodi

WTF said:


> My county has been in the news a lot lately- shootings (the most recent one had a young man die), drug raids and a would-be terrorist arrested... but this story broke out yesterday and I cant stop thinking about it...
> 
> Pittsfield Police Investigating Murder-Suicide
> 
> A father killed his 11 yr old daughter and then himself.
> 
> My daddy is the #1 man in my life. My daddy will always be my protector. My daddy will always make sure I am safe. I trust my daddy with my life.
> 
> Did this girl trust her daddy? Did he tell her everything would be ok and that she was safe?
> 
> I cant stop crying.



Something's amiss in Berkshire county. Sorry for all the problems lately.


----------



## Ruby Ripples

I am really missing how Dimensions was several years ago. I met the most wonderful friend on here (Lorna) and I met my wonderful man via this site too (my Swede). I also met many online friends and I remember lots of times actually crying with laughter at my computer at conversations in the chat room. I know that time can't go backwards but I would just love it if we could get some semblance of group friendship and community back again, it was just so lovely and fun. 

I still come on regularly and end up mainly staying on the foodee section and it really does make me sad.


----------



## CleverBomb

Yeah, the good old days here really were pretty darn good. 
I'm not sure how to get that back, or even if it's possible. 

*sigh*


----------



## Tad

My too (or three?) on missing 'the old days.' There is still good stuff here IMO, but it is certainly not as active as it was, and there are lots of fantastic people who have moved on. I'm not sure how much is that there are so many other places out there these days, how much is that some portion of people don't really use the broader web anymore and instead live in social media platforms, how much is that for a lot of people a place like this helps for a certain stage in their life then they move on, and now that almost everyone has been on the net for a while there are less people just getting to that stage, how much is some of the site policies (official and implied) that drove some people away, how much is other stuff....

There have always been great people who left, heck one of my all time fave chatters left before the chat rooms even got busy, way back in the day. And departures do seem to somewhat come in waves. But there seem to be a lot less people joining in recent years. When I sign in, sometimes I'm feeling like I'm walking in the door of the Legion or the Elk Lodge, (or insert name of social organization that was popular in former years, but has a declining and aging membership). And that makes me sad for sure.


----------



## Allie Cat

A week ago today, one of my best friends from high school died.

Cause of death was not announced. I have suspicions but feel it would be inappropriate to voice them or ask his wife or family.

Since I found out, I have been consumed by guilt and grief.

I went to his funeral on Saturday. I reunited with old friends and we shared our love for him with each other and with his family and other friends.

I never told him how much he meant to me. I never told him how much I love him. Maybe it was romantic, maybe it wasn't, I don't know. He had an intense, pure charisma that drew people in like a black hole, and it was impossible to know him and not love him.

A week ago today, the 2003 class of IAHS lost one of its best.

A week ago today, the world lost Tyler Grant McPherson, and it is a worse place for it.


----------



## Green Eyed King

I was about to question the point of this thread as to how depressing it may get here for people who are writing here. Certainly not pleasant for spectators who are just checking the thread but maybe sometimes when you need to let something off of your chest you can let it out here.



Ruby Ripples said:


> I am really missing how Dimensions was several years ago. I met the most wonderful friend on here (Lorna) and I met my wonderful man via this site too (my Swede). I also met many online friends and I remember lots of times actually crying with laughter at my computer at conversations in the chat room. I know that time can't go backwards but I would just love it if we could get some semblance of group friendship and community back again, it was just so lovely and fun.
> 
> I still come on regularly and end up mainly staying on the foodee section and it really does make me sad.



I think the reason most people aren't here is because they have someone who has them occupied. We all long for that, so it isn't such a bad thing maybe being happy for them is best way to feel good. I know how it's like to miss friends I have quite a few I met from the past and actually found them here


----------



## biggirlsrock

Silly as this may sound, I just posted on the "Remember when" thread about records & record stores, & I'm sitting here bummed out that Tower Records is no longer in existence...


----------



## seavixen

Betrayal. So much betrayal. Disrespect. Safety shattered again; regret about struggling with re-learning how to trust, only to end up at square one nearly a decade later. Betrayals steadily destroy your sense of self until you can't trust anything anymore. I don't even know if I'm sad. I just can't stand myself, and I feel utterly empty.


----------



## Surlysomething

I'm so sorry you're going through this. I've been betrayed recently too and it's put a huge, painful wrench in my life, so I understand. Big hug your way. 




seavixen said:


> Betrayal. So much betrayal. Disrespect. Safety shattered again; regret about struggling with re-learning how to trust, only to end up at square one nearly a decade later. Betrayals steadily destroy your sense of self until you can't trust anything anymore. I don't even know if I'm sad. I just can't stand myself, and I feel utterly empty.


----------



## Ho Ho Tai

I poured my 2nd cup of coffee and settled down to enjoy the anticipation of another Met Opera season, as outlined in the Met Opera Program Guide. What I read jolted me out of my warm glow like a bucket of ice water. Margaret Juntwait, the wonderful 'Voice of the Met' since 2004, died of cancer this summer. This was the first I had heard of it. She was the same age as Mrs Ho Ho.

I felt as I would feel if I had just read the obituary of someone I had just seen last week.

She is only the third person to fill that capacity since the Met began broadcasting, following Milton Cross and Peter Allen. When she first stepped into that role, I wasn't too sure. The voice of Milton Cross still resonated in my brain. Peter Allen was business-like and certainly in command. Margaret Juntwait sounded more like the Girl Next Door but I soon came to love her, as have millions of other Met Radio fans.

There are memorials all over the internet. The one I read in the Met Opera Program Guide was written by Elena Park. I can't find it on the web but this one is very nice and descriptive.

*Viewpoint: The Voice of a Friend*

 *by F. PAUL DRISCOLL* 


There is a thread, somewhere, with the title "Do you have a fat ass and love opera". If I had more time, I'd dig it out and revive it.

We have recorded the opera for decades, first on cassettes, then on VCR tape and now direct to disk. I guess that old tech isn't quite ready for the scrap heap after all.

Note: I found that old thread "Do you have a fat ass and love opera?" Fun read!


----------



## Victoria08

My brother just asked me to help him out with some ideas of how to propose to his girlfriend. The thing is, his girlfriend is one of those people that just really isn't nice. She's not a nice person at all. She is so very controlling of him - she limits his contact with me and my mum, she makes threats and manipulates him in order to get what she wants.
It's just sad and so frustrating to see him turn a blind eye and pretend like she's this perfect angel. I know he loves her, but I don't understand how he can be happy with her in the long run when she's downing a heavy combo of pills and booze just because he disagrees with her on something stupid and trivial. It's not a healthy relationship and she is not a stable individual.
I don't know what to do here.


----------



## Yakatori

But choose them carefully. And only speak for yourself. 

Generally, people do not ask for your help with something; ask you about it, how to go about doing it; without wanting your approval, at some level. Sometimes even more so, more deeply, the less explicit or direct they are in asking for it.

And so, if you can't do so honestly, better you didn't.

Instead, try to use more "_I_" sentences, when talking about your own reservations. As in, "_I'm worried that/It seems to me like...something's not right here, that I'm not getting the whole story, here ._" -versus- "_She's no good, and you're about to make the biggest mistake of your life._"

Here's a few others, for good measure:

"_I need know where this is coming from, why is this 'a good idea' right now?_" "_I don't understand why you/we can't..._" 

Obviously, this is no guarantee, everyone will necessarily make their own decisions and live their own life. But, sometimes, initiating some actual dialogue can help to begin to put an apparently complex situation into some kind of better perspective. Either way, you will certainly feel better for at least having done your own part, being heard as your true self.


----------



## Victoria08

So I used my words, and then I got them thrown back in my face.
Living a few thousand miles away from your sibling makes it pretty damn hard to give them the reality check they need.
But thank you for your advice, nonetheless.


----------



## lostinadaydream

Where to write else but here? 

What makes me sad at the moment is that one of the most beatiful fat girls around I know recently did a WLS. She didn't seem to think of that like I knew her, but now she did. She was such a stunning, beautiful woman and every pound on her were just beautiful. Well, that feels very sad to me.


----------



## Yakatori

It comes with the territory of living honestly that sometimes what you have to say or give just isn't enough. Or so it seems, for the time being. Which is why, then, after you've made your point, it also helps even further to give people some time and space, to respect how we all ultimately process things at own pace. Likewise, maybe a day or two later, a follow-up tends to draw things back full-circle. I mean to just saying something like, "_Hey, I realize you're unhappy about this. That you want me see to it and feel about it a certain way. Either way, no matter what, it doesn't really change anything between us. I still love you and I know you love me._" So, not so specific to the more immediate issue, but more putting the emphasis where it needs to be, on the relationship-itself, between the two of you. That’s what’s really most important, that’s the value that ultimately endures and is actually worth some sustained investment.

Try to leave a voicemail in lieu of a text or email. That is, if they don’t pick-up the first time you call. 

This will encourage looking at the whole situation a little more deeply and from a wider perspective, albeit on their own terms. And, perhaps, to pick the previous dialogue at some more opportune moment.

This isn’t over. So don’t give up.


----------



## Allie Cat

I've been getting close to another girl at work and we've been talking about our relationship and closeness and stuff. Today, she was fired. She'd been being harassed by some of the men on her team, and last night she flipped out at one of them. After she went to her supervisor for help, they decided to fire her instead of helping her.

I'm sad, angry, and severely disappointed.


----------



## Snow Angel

I hate being sick I have 101.2 fever now but hope I can kick this cold or whatever it is in the butt.


----------



## swamptoad

Snow Angel said:


> I hate being sick I have 101.2 fever now but hope I can kick this cold or whatever it is in the butt.



I hate being sick too. Hope you get over that fever soon. Love you, babe!


----------



## canadianbbw4u

I'm totally sad today. 

My b'f went back to work out of town today. He works 17 days on and 4 off. He is about 6 hours from home while working. He was home this weekend and I was soo happy. On Saturday that all ended. My mom had to take her sister to the hospital cause she was "lost/confused". They did some tests at the hospital and a few hours later they told her she had brain cancer. I feel sooooo sad for my mom. She only found out a few months ago that her brother has cancer also and he's not doing good. So now she is going to lose a brother and sister. I am a wreck. I hate seeing people in pain. My poor Granny... OMG... 
I am just sitting here crying all alone.


----------



## Tad

Oh, that is a lot to deal with all at once, CBBW4U. Best wishes for strength on getting through the next months.


----------



## canadianbbw4u

Tad said:


> Oh, that is a lot to deal with all at once, CBBW4U. Best wishes for strength on getting through the next months.




Thank you!!


----------



## x0emnem0x

My brain being stupid and letting my anxiety get the best of me.


----------



## Marlayna

All the snow in NY is bumming me out. I'm sick of shoveling, and if we get any more, I'm gonna lose my mind.


----------



## RabbitScorpion

Facing the fifth Valentines Day in a row when I'll be snuggling up to my big, fluffy..........pillow:-(


----------



## Ho Ho Tai

RabbitScorpion said:


> Facing the fifth Valentines Day in a row when I'll be snuggling up to my big, fluffy..........pillow:-(



This story just appeared today (Sunday, Feb. 14, 2016) in our local paper.
While I get my satisfy, There are many who do not - one reason why I love to offer hug-exchanges with many that I meet.

There was quite a bit of this sort of thing in the '70s, only not as inhibited.

*Feeling lonely? Some Minnesotans turn to snuggling with strangers*

Feeling a need for physical contact, Minnesotans are cuddling up with strangers. 
*By Aimee Blanchette* Star Tribune 
February 14, 2016  8:30am 




 Courtney Perry, Special to the Star Tribune A pillow commanded "Hug Me" as Becky Shipman, Thomas Stout and Diane Long snuggled during a "cuddle party" at a home in south Minneapolis. 

  After a few hours of conversation in a room at the Super 8 motel in Roseville, Marissa Weiss fell asleep with a mans arm around her waist.
 The man, however, was not her boyfriend. In fact, they had met only hours before. Weiss, 22, was a professional snuggler. For $80 an hour, she would cuddle, comfort and caress for a fee.


----------



## CPProp

Remebering that its 9 years to the day that my wife died and making the hardest phone calls Ive ever had to make in my life to my kids.


----------



## canadianbbw4u

canadianbbw4u said:


> I'm totally sad today.
> 
> My b'f went back to work out of town today. He works 17 days on and 4 off. He is about 6 hours from home while working. He was home this weekend and I was soo happy. On Saturday that all ended. My mom had to take her sister to the hospital cause she was "lost/confused". They did some tests at the hospital and a few hours later they told her she had brain cancer. I feel sooooo sad for my mom. She only found out a few months ago that her brother has cancer also and he's not doing good. So now she is going to lose a brother and sister. I am a wreck. I hate seeing people in pain. My poor Granny... OMG...
> I am just sitting here crying all alone.




STILL SAD......... My uncle is not doing good at all. They don't think he has many weeks left if that. My Auntie had brain surgery last month for her cancer but she also has lung cancer and they told her yesterday that she has 2 years. This is the exact same thing they told my uncle 6 months ago.


----------



## Ruby Ripples

canadianbbw4u said:


> STILL SAD......... My uncle is not doing good at all. They don't think he has many weeks left if that. My Auntie had brain surgery last month for her cancer but she also has lung cancer and they told her yesterday that she has 2 years. This is the exact same thing they told my uncle 6 months ago.



So sorry to read this news. I think giving timescales is very difficult when it comes to cancer, but obviously most people want to have some idea.

My very good friend and neighbour had a pain in her neck up to her mouth and mentioned it to the GP a few weeks ago when in seeing her about something else. Turns out she has cancer in her throat, but she also has secondaries in her kidneys and liver. This is a lovely, lovely woman who wouldn't hurt a fly. She is so kind-hearted and puts everyone before herself. She has survived a quadruple heart bypass, two hip replacements (titanium hips so now has worse pain than before due to the negative ion trouble), and ovarian cancer which she miraculously survived despite her idiot doctor sending her home for twelve months telling her it was referred pain from her hips. 

I'm really glad that she isn't medically very savvy, so she is hopeful of recovery and is bravely undergoing her chemo and has chosen a nice wig. I have a cry about it often because I don't think she can recover from this, but I hope with all my heart that her positive attitude will help her through somehow.


----------



## Tad

Two sads today, one delayed from last weekend and one more current.

=====================

The delayed one was that last weekend, out in Vancouver, the band Spirit of the West played their last concert. The guys are in their fifties now, and have had some health problems, but why we know that this was truly the last show is that the front man has early onset Alzheimer’s. On this last tour he’s performed with an IPad in front him with the lyrics on it, because even on songs they’ve done so many times, he was forgetting words at times.

In part I’m sad because it is sad to see anyone losing themselves so early (and I lost a grandfather to Alzheimer’s, so it always echos that for me, and makes me wonder if it will turn out to be heritable &#8211; will my father get it, will I get it?). But also…. Because they are the &#8216;band that got away’ to my wife and I. When we were first together they played once or twice each year at the University where she was still a student, and we both loved the band and really wanted to go see them…. But something always came up. When we were long distance they would play mid-week when I couldn’t get there, or they were playing the weekend we had to be elsewhere for a family birthday, later when we were living together down there we even had tickets for one show but my wife (then fiancée) came down with pneumonia a few days ahead of time. And it kept going on like that. There were opportunities for one of us to see them, but we wanted to do it together, and we always figured one of these times we’d catch them …. Then they stopped touring for the most part.

We sort-of-kind-of saw them once, the core of the band did a tour playing with various symphony orchestras, and we saw part of that show (it was free and outside, so we took our kindergarten aged son and got him to put up with some of the show. But it wasn’t the music as we’d first loved it, it didn’t have their usual stage energy, and we couldn’t spare more than about a third of our attention for the show. But we hoped after that occasion that they’d do some tours of the Summer festival circuit and we’d catch them, and while they did do some more touring, never where we could catch them.

And now we never will.

=====================

The more current one is a parenting one. The boy got advanced (provisional) acceptance at a couple of universities, and maybe that gave him some false confidence? Maybe he just hit the combination of courses and teachers where the way he’s been doing things was no longer good enough? Whatever the cause, despite understanding the material he got horrible mid-term marks in his physics and vectors classes &#8211; I think they are actually the two worse marks we’ve seen on a high school report card from him. 

He’s already working on turning things around, but the situation only really came to light shortly before these marks went in. He should be able to get both marks up somewhat, hopefully at least enough to hold his provisional acceptances, but he may have kissed goodbye to some small scholarship that is based on high-school average. And more critically, there was one more school he’d applied to, the one that is by far the harder to get into, which hadn’t made a decision on him yet &#8211; their timeline was clearly designed to let them look at mid-term marks. Well, he won’t be getting in there now. He hadn’t been sure he wanted to go there, but he certainly would have like to have had the option.

He was doing a good job of covering up the issue. We’d talk regularly about what he was doing in his classes, and he could explain it all clearly. We’d ask about homework and he said that he was doing it at lunch now. Which he was, sort of &#8211; he’d skim through the questions, go &#8216;yup, I know how to do that one, and that one, and that one ….” And would quickly scribble down answers for some of them, without really working things through properly. And sure enough he forgot how to do one thing on a vectors test, he did things sloppily on physics tests where he gave away huge numbers of marks because he wasn’t making it clear what he was doing and why, he made mistakes on both because he just hasn’t done enough good practice.

I’m kicking myself for not demanding to review his homework, but he’d been pretty good last term, and is 18, so I took his word for it that he was on top of things. Just frustrating that he’s cost himself some opportunities and a lot of stress, and still a little worried that he won’t get the physics mark pulled up enough (their teacher is notorious within the school for being a tough marker)


----------



## Xyantha Reborn

I may have lost a friend by giving too honest of an opinion. People don't seem to get that you can still adore a person while finding them frustrating, or you can love them as a friend without feeling that they are perfect. They also forget that i like to play devil's advocate, and if they chose to put someone on a pedestal i may take the other side of the arguement just as easily as if they were tearing them down, and i was to raise them up.

Bah.

Edit: on a different note: people who are so sensitive that they need to be handled with kid gloves is exhausting. I've been so shy that i took almost everything as a rebuff, and finally some people sat me down and told me how exhausting it was for them to keep babying me. I didn't get it until i came out of my own shell, but now i really get it. Makes me sad because i'd like to pretend it isn't exhausting but it is, and now i get why they had to tell me "we love you so shut the frack up and accept it, biznatch!"


----------



## x0emnem0x

The weather sucked today. Rain and clouds made me depressed, which brought on a bout of anxiety and made shit hit the ceiling. On top of that Jon has been busy with whatever today and super distant, and almost everyone I have talked to seems super un-phased by the fact that I'm having a hard time right now. Which is just frustrating in itself, because I'm always caring way too much about everyone else and making sure they're alright...


----------



## CleverBomb

Not sad, but pissed off (didn't see a "what's making you angry today' thread, though I expect there is one somewhere).

Got a new cheapie flip-phone to take the ported-over landline number from my old house (wanted to save it since the number was, by random chance back in 1961, highly memorable and nifty). The process went well, and the salesman was quite helpful and pleasant to work with. 

That's not the problem.

The problem was that they sent a text-message survey. I couldn't get the phone to type what I wanted using the 12-key number pad, and accidentally rated the salesman as a 1 instead of a 10... 

When it got to the "any other comments?" question, I swapped the SIM card into my daily-driver smartphone to type the reply explaining what had happened (on the big on-screen keyboard like any sensible phone should have) but I'm still worried I screwed up this guy's week accidentally.

I'll probably go to that cellphone store in the morning and try to explain it to the manager.


----------



## squeezablysoft

*I'm leaving for college on Friday and while I'm excited about school and making new friends, I'm sad that I may have to find a new home for my dog because we can't take pets to the dorms and my folks were going to keep him for me but they have bad allergies and he has long hair that aggravates the allergies, plus they travel a lot. We are hoping someone we know wants him so we know he is getting a good home and so I can check in on him from time to time.*


----------



## x0emnem0x

CleverBomb said:


> Not sad, but pissed off (didn't see a "what's making you angry today' thread, though I expect there is one somewhere).



http://www.dimensionsmagazine.com/forums/showthread.php?t=94210&page=93


----------



## Adamantoise

I couldn't find anywhere else to post, and to be honest I'm really hesitant as I post this. I knew that I wasn't the most physically active person in the world, but I had tried to change my ways several times, only I couldn't keep it up. I had an appointment with my GP this week - he's a lovely bloke, very pleasant and intelligent with a calming voice, and it was nothing that he did or said that's caused this sudden detriment of my state of mind.

No, it was my own stupid fault. I tried out the weighing machine at the office, nice electronic one that measures your height and weight, multiplies them together blah blah blah you know how BMI (doesn't) work. I was shocked... I'm not 6' 1'' as I previously thought, but it doesn't bother me because I know that gravity and the amount of time you've been awake affect the height of a person, so whatever. Not too big a deal. What actually shocked me was how much weight I'd put on (I'm around 294 lbs at the time of writing this). I was shocked and upset, but I know I can only really blame myself...so that's basically where I am. I don't really know how to feel about any of this. I'm sorry for rambling on. I just don't feel comfortable with my body at the moment, and I feel terribly nervous about posting this.


----------



## Xyantha Reborn

Don't be nervous. IMO you are entitled to feel about your body - what you feel. If you are unhappy about it, then you are unhappy. 

My suggestion is take a few days to just feel bad. Then decide where you would want to be - what would you need to do to get there? Is there a compromise with yourself to at least make yourself feel a bit better? 

Numbers have this horrible sticker shock; is the number, or how you feel?


----------



## Leem

I can sympathize. I know how hard it is to see those numbers go up especially when you are not expecting them to. The struggle to lose weight only to see the numbers go up is always difficult. I have always been left with a feeling of failure. But I have come to the realization this year that I cannot allow that number to define who I am. I am sure that you are so much more than those numbers on the scale. You are the same person you were before you got on the scales and saw that number. I agree with Xyantha, take a few days to let it sink in.


----------



## Adamantoise

Thanks guys, I appreciate your advice... :blush:


----------



## Adamantoise

Rocky (my dog and friend) was unwell for the past few weeks, and he died a few hours ago. Words can't express how pissed off I am.


----------



## Xyantha Reborn

i am so sorry


----------



## Tad

So sorry for you. Loss of a loved one hurts, no matter how many legs they have.


----------



## Adamantoise

Xyantha Reborn said:


> i am so sorry





Tad said:


> So sorry for you. Loss of a loved one hurts, no matter how many legs they have.



I want to thank you both deeply for your condolences. We still have one of our boys, and we love him dearly, but it just will never feel the same without Rocky.


----------



## Leem

Dogs are members of the family, when they die they leave a large hole in our hearts and lives. I am so sorry for your loss.


----------



## Adamantoise

Leem said:


> Dogs are members of the family, when they die they leave a large hole in our hearts and lives. I am so sorry for your loss.



Thank you for your kind words.


----------



## Artaidan

My anxiety... social anxiety... it completely ruins my life and I start be a forums rat...


----------



## Adamantoise

Artaidan said:


> My anxiety... social anxiety... it completely ruins my life and I start be a forums rat...



I've noticed that this is your first post on Dimensions, so welcome aboard!

I can relate to the problem of social anxiety greatly, but in order to defeat it, you must start slowly and gradually. Make small trips to places nearby and back, preferably when there are no people around (at night, where I live, it's pretty quiet) - then when you've gotten used to it, be a bit braver and try going out a little earlier, to get used to seeing people around. I hope this helps you, my friend. :happy:


----------



## x0emnem0x

Artaidan said:


> My anxiety... social anxiety... it completely ruins my life and I start be a forums rat...



Story of my life. You're not alone!


----------



## DianaSSBBW

What is wrong with my country! When being bilingual is wrong! Heck, when I lived in Holland I was embarrassed to only speak two languages. Everyone that I met spoke 5 and 6 different languages.

http://www.leadertelegram.com/Opinion/Commentary/2016/11/20/Speaking-Spanish-in-America.html


----------



## socrates74

Trying to figure out this place. I still haven't looked up FFA.


----------



## Tad

FFA=Female fat admirer


----------



## LumpySmile

Cold... Dark.... I hate winter.

And heating just the one room I'm in to save money makes me feel like I'm in a prison cell


----------



## Leem

My grandma passed away this evening. She was a wonderful caring person who helped me through some dark days and loved me unconditionally.


----------



## LumpySmile

So sorry for your loss, Leem.


----------



## Adamantoise

Leem said:


> My grandma passed away this evening. She was a wonderful caring person who helped me through some dark days and loved me unconditionally.



You have my condolences. I'm sorry to hear this.


----------



## Leem

Thank you both.


----------



## DianaSSBBW

My heart broke today...
A guy was remarking to a another gentleman that he had to go to his inlaws tomorrow to celebrate Christmas. That they never went on Christmas, but for the last # (can't exact number) of years they always have to go the Saturday before, never the day of or after, always the Saturday before and always the same thing. 
A lady walked up the gentlemen, stopped and said: "I just wish I had someplace to go" and went on walking out of the store.
Silence overcame the store, you could have heard a pin drop.


----------



## Angel

I heard a man yelling. Then more men yelling. And a roaring sound (like a train; or from a foundry or blast furnace). I remember thinking, why won't that sound stop?

I just learned why the men were yelling and what the noise was.  :really sad:


If you (or if anyone in your family, your friends, or your neighbors) don't have smoke detectors in your (their ) home, please invest in a couple per home.


----------



## Tad

Oh my goodness!! This was your place?


----------



## Angel

Tad said:


> Oh my goodness!! This was your place?



No, but I would have it rather been my home than a neighbor's. 
Material possessions can be replaced; the life of a child can't be.


----------



## rellis10

The notion of being single over another Christmas. That's pretty saddening right now.

This year was a big one for rebuilding my confidence where it had been pretty much obliterated. It's a long path, though, and spending another Christmas being a third wheel around other couples hasn't done me any favors. Basically everyone else in my life is with someone in some way so it's hard not to feel like I've done something wrong at some point to be the only one left.


----------



## Tracyarts

General holiday sadness. 

When I was young, Christmas and Easter were huge deals in my family. Christmas especially, as it was a three day celebration. Christmas eve-eve was our immediate family celebration, Christmas eve we were with my paternal extended family, and Christmas day with my maternal extended family. There were loads of traditions and everyone got along so it was drama free and stress free. 

Now all of that is over. My parents are gone, my brother, my grandparents, all the aunts and uncles I was closest to. And the surviving aunts, uncles and cousins aren't close and aren't interested in getting together or even keeping in touch. It got to where the only time we saw each other was during funerals, so I stopped going to them, because it got to be too depressing. 

My husband's family are scattered around the country. East coast, Gulf coast, and West coast. We live near his parents, but they don't really celebrate. There are a few extended inlaws nearby, but they're awfully cliqueish and will be polite, but treat us like guests instead of family. 

I didn't decorate, the budget was too tight to go on a weekend trip or do anything local. So we just stayed in, watched movies, and cooked a slightly fancier than normal dinner on Sunday. Oh, and it was 80+ degrees . It didn't feel like Christmas at all.

And last night and earlier this morning I had a massive anxiety attack, which hasn't happened since September.


----------



## Kristal

Tracyarts said:


> General holiday sadness.
> 
> When I was young, Christmas and Easter were huge deals in my family. Christmas especially, as it was a three day celebration. Christmas eve-eve was our immediate family celebration, Christmas eve we were with my paternal extended family, and Christmas day with my maternal extended family. There were loads of traditions and everyone got along so it was drama free and stress free.
> 
> Now all of that is over. My parents are gone, my brother, my grandparents, all the aunts and uncles I was closest to. And the surviving aunts, uncles and cousins aren't close and aren't interested in getting together or even keeping in touch. It got to where the only time we saw each other was during funerals, so I stopped going to them, because it got to be too depressing.
> 
> My husband's family are scattered around the country. East coast, Gulf coast, and West coast. We live near his parents, but they don't really celebrate. There are a few extended inlaws nearby, but they're awfully cliqueish and will be polite, but treat us like guests instead of family.
> 
> I didn't decorate, the budget was too tight to go on a weekend trip or do anything local. So we just stayed in, watched movies, and cooked a slightly fancier than normal dinner on Sunday. Oh, and it was 80+ degrees . It didn't feel like Christmas at all.
> 
> And last night and earlier this morning I had a massive anxiety attack, which hasn't happened since September.



My way of dealing with a situation not unlike your own was to find friend(s) who may someday become 'like family' to you.


----------



## Tracyarts

I'm hoping to find new social outlets after we move and hopefully make some more close friends. Mine all moved on in one way or another over the years, and the area we live in right now isn't very inclusive for people who don't fit in, and we really don't fit in. The only social activity I enjoyed was a knit and crochet group, but the library stopped hosting it, and the women who wanted to keep meeting decided to meet at the local senior citizens center, and I'm 9 years too young to attend. I'm going to a few meetups this month, maybe I'll at least find an activity group again.


----------



## LumpySmile

It's 15 miles to the store, after midnight, and 2 degrees out there. I have no sweets at all in the house, so of course I'm craving cookies....


----------



## DianaSSBBW

I really don't like snow, but today I was wishing for lots of snow, like in Philadelphia (State of Emergency) so where I work would not open.
I was really counting on an adult "Snow Day"
They called for most of the snow overnight, but the snow started early morning and all day!
So now the nightmare is driving in the snow to get home!


----------



## moore2me

My brother and I had to put mom in Hospice during the weekend. She is still in a nursing home. Hospice is taking over her final care while there. Altho I am sad, mom would have wanted it this way. Lord knows she told me that enough times when we could talk like we used to.

If anyone is not familiar with how Hospice works - here is a brief intro. . . Hospice is a group of professionals and volunteers that take over the care of person who is near death. Their objective is to assure their client can die a natural death with dignity and humanity. No heroic life saving means are taken to keep the person from a natural death. 

The client is kept as pain free and comfortable as possible. A team of nurses, a social worker, minister, doctors and family counselors work with the dying person and their family. I my opinion, mom is so frail and ready to die, that it would be obscene to give her CPR (cracking her ribs) and keeping her from where her spirit wants to go.

About three years ago when she had a major surgery and she was lucid and in charge - had them code her as a DNR (do not resuscitate) is she died during the surgery or afterward. However, at that time. her mind was still clear. If she fell at home or outside her house, she willingly would call the fire dept to pick her up and take her back inside & get her mobile again.


----------



## LumpySmile

I'm so sorry to hear that Moore2me.... I'm sorry for your loss and the pain you're going through right now... Bless you and yours in this time of sorrow


----------



## AuntHen

It's not so much sad as frustrated and urghhh, I can't think of the word right now.

First let me say, I completely understand how religious people can give religion a bad name , in particular people who claim to be Christians, giving Christians a bad name . Sigh.

I get it. The hypocrites, the judgmental attitudes, the closed mindedness, the ones who are in word only but not in deed, the list goes on. However, I am so tired of being lumped in prematurely (and even more *incorrectly*) with the fundies and/or "holy rollers" and that lot. If, for example, I say something that let's someone think or know I believe in a higher power or am a Christian, they just assume I am like all the others without even talking to me about it and finding out just what I think and believe or being around me to see how I behave.

I think that is just as bad and so judgemental as well. 

I think weary is the word I wanted.

I am sorry if someone who claimed to be something treated you bad or made you think ill of it but please don't take it out on me or misjudge/misunderstand me. I know life is not fair but it really isn't fair.


----------



## squeezablysoft

I'm sad that my mom is not fat-friendly and I'm staying with her for the next year. Makes me sad. And hungry.


----------



## Tad

Gord Downie, lead singer and songwriter of The Tragically Hip, has passed away. We all knew it was coming after the announcement of brain cancer last year, but ..... dayum, he was the soundtrack of my twenties pretty much, there is so many memories that involved their music (plus that I saw them in concert about five times). Hard to accept that he's really gone.


----------



## FreeThinker

Wow. 

Thanks for sharing the news. 

He stayed at it well after leaving the band due to his illness, producing some good work. He wasn't done yet. 

Sad.


----------



## Tad

He was SO not done yet, I thought their last album as a band was their strongest in a while, and as you said he did some amazing solo work at the end too.

My main radio station played only their songs the rest of the day after the news came out yesterday morning (also reading memories that listeners sent in). They may have played some songs more than once over the course of the day, but not that I heard. There are fans of pretty much every song he ever recorded.


----------



## Angel

physical pain and the associated limited mobility / issues

Dr: We need to immobilize your knee and get you on crutches.
Me: That's not going to work.
Dr: They make steel crutches.
Me: That's not going to work.

I just need a sexy and compassionate FA to cater to my needs and desires! 
Some kneading would be nice, too.


----------



## LumpySmile

Angel said:


> physical pain and the associated limited mobility / issues
> 
> Dr: We need to immobilize your knee and get you on crutches.
> Me: That's not going to work.
> Dr: They make steel crutches.
> Me: That's not going to work.
> 
> I just need a sexy and compassionate FA to cater to my needs and desires!
> Some kneading would be nice, too.



Any chance you could get one of those scooters instead of the crutches? Not the motorized kind, but one of those medical kick scooters... You gotta admit, they look like fun


----------



## DJ_S

..... .... .... .. . .. . . . . . . . ... . . . . .. . . . .. . . < ants


----------



## Rojodi

A popular coworker lost her parents Saturday evening, within hours of each hour.


----------



## Mamie Jennings

My doctor told me that my depression and anxiety are worse cause I haven't go to the subsequent visit months ago.
So..basically...... sad abt everything


----------



## Ohio Lady

i lost a very dear friend and my heart is breaking 
i feel as though i am in a fog at this point and time crying a lot
we also lost two amish kids age eighteen who were involved in a wreck ~ SOME FRIENDS JUST LOST THEIR MOM YESTERDAY AND I"VE KNOWN THE FAMILY EVER SINCE I WAS TWELVE ~ MY BEST FRIEND LOST HER HUSBAND IN JULY AND IT SEEMS LIKE ALL THIS IS NEVER GOING TO STOP!!!


----------



## Tracyarts

I just found out that one of my former coworkers may die. He came down with the flu a couple of months ago, it hit him hard and he couldn't get over it. A couple of weeks into it, he developed pneumonia and deteriorated fast. He's been in a coma for over a month, on a ventilator. He developed sepsis and his body is giving out The doctor says his chances of pulling through aren't good. That's horrifying. He was a healthy guy in his early 40s.


----------



## John Smith

World.

What I feel is the World.


----------



## da3ley

*What is making you SAD right now...*

*My 37lb weight gain, that's what! I'm totally disgusted as I didn't realize I f*cked up again.*


----------



## da3ley

Tracyarts said:


> I just found out that one of my former coworkers may die. He came down with the flu a couple of months ago, it hit him hard and he couldn't get over it. A couple of weeks into it, he developed pneumonia and deteriorated fast. He's been in a coma for over a month, on a ventilator. He developed sepsis and his body is giving out The doctor says his chances of pulling through aren't good. That's horrifying. He was a healthy guy in his early 40s.



wow, sorry to hear, that is bad. Did he pull through?


----------



## Colonial Warrior

Feeling myself like I am here in the loneliest corner of this planet!!!


----------



## da3ley

Colonial Warrior said:


> Feeling myself like I am here in the loneliest corner of this planet!!!


I feel ya!


----------



## JMCGB

da3ley said:


> *What is making you SAD right now...*
> 
> *My 37lb weight gain, that's what! I'm totally disgusted as I didn't realize I f*cked up again.*


Just curious as to why you are so disgusted with that?


----------



## da3ley

JMCGB said:


> Just curious as to why you are so disgusted with that?



Hi,
because I was really trying NOT to gain more. I was trying hard to watch my diet, but found out through a specialist that my weight gain is partly bc of Cushings Syndrome/Chronic steroid use, (and partly bc of stuffing my pie-hole) my hormones are whacked. I'm disgusted bc i could've found out sooner had I scheduled an appointment last year to this Dr.

I'm 5ft 10, over 500lbs, hurt when I walk sometimes, and I need to take my health serious. I'm disgusted in myself. Ty for asking though.


----------



## JMCGB

da3ley said:


> Hi,
> because I was really trying NOT to gain more. I was trying hard to watch my diet, but found out through a specialist that my weight gain is partly bc of Cushings Syndrome/Chronic steroid use, (and partly bc of stuffing my pie-hole) my hormones are whacked. I'm disgusted bc i could've found out sooner had I scheduled an appointment last year to this Dr.
> 
> I'm 5ft 10, over 500lbs, hurt when I walk sometimes, and I need to take my health serious. I'm disgusted in myself. Ty for asking though.


Well by all means I sincerely hope you get to where you want to be health wise.


----------



## da3ley

JMCGB said:


> Well by all means I sincerely hope you get to where you want to be health wise.



tysm, you are very kind.


----------



## Colonial Warrior

da3ley said:


> Hi,
> because I was really trying NOT to gain more. I was trying hard to watch my diet, but found out through a specialist that my weight gain is partly bc of Cushings Syndrome/Chronic steroid use, (and partly bc of stuffing my pie-hole) my hormones are whacked. I'm disgusted bc i could've found out sooner had I scheduled an appointment last year to this Dr.
> 
> I'm 5ft 10, over 500lbs, hurt when I walk sometimes, and I need to take my health serious. I'm disgusted in myself. Ty for asking though.



Sometimes I feel the same. I Obstructive Sleep Apnea.

I have also problems with my overeating. I have a FB account but sometimes I feel so lonely because most of my friends are from so far away. I live here with my mother as a single never been married. My best wish is to move from here to start a new life but I will not want to leave my mother alone. 

I just wish to not gain more weight just like you, my best wishes on that. 

It's so very nice to find people like you here to share what we feel!!!


----------



## da3ley

Colonial Warrior said:


> Sometimes I feel the same. I Obstructive Sleep Apnea.
> 
> I have also problems with my overeating. I have a FB account but sometimes I feel so lonely because most of my friends are from so far away. I live here with my mother as a single never been married. My best wish is to move from here to start a new life but I will not want to leave my mother alone.
> 
> I just wish to not gain more weight just like you, my best wishes on that.
> 
> It's so very nice to find people like you here to share what we feel!!!


You are a devoted thats for sure! I too have OSA.,have to use the machine every night. if you ever need someone, hit me up.,as i'll be glad to talk! we can maybe help eachother, who knows! [email protected]. im Dana btw. take care now!


----------



## Colonial Warrior

da3ley said:


> You are a devoted thats for sure! I too have OSA.,have to use the machine every night. if you ever need someone, hit me up.,as i'll be glad to talk! we can maybe help eachother, who knows! [email protected]. im Dana btw. take care now!


So many thanks for sharing with me, Dana, and take care you too!!!


----------



## Fantasist

I’m sad that I never seem to learn my lesson with certain people. It makes me feel foolish, as if I deserve it for ignoring what’s obvious. Sigh.


----------



## Colonial Warrior

Fantasist said:


> I’m sad that I never seem to learn my lesson with certain people. It makes me feel foolish, as if I deserve it for ignoring what’s obvious. Sigh.


Some I made the mistake of trusting in the worst kind of persons. 

The best advice I can give to you is learn from you past experiences and get some time to know a person well! There is a lot of good and bad people out there!!!


----------



## AmyJo1976

Fantasist said:


> I’m sad that I never seem to learn my lesson with certain people. It makes me feel foolish, as if I deserve it for ignoring what’s obvious. Sigh.


Never blame yourself for the actions of a jerk. I just write them off and move on!


----------



## DragonFly

AmyJo1976 said:


> Never blame yourself for the actions of a jerk. I just write them off and move on!


Good advice! I would also suggest having someone who is in your corner be your second look. I can seem to pick out the jerks when a good friend finds one. When I scoop one up I just don’t realize.


----------



## da3ley

I'm sad today as i cant seem to ever get it right w/ weight loss. Instead of losing as I'd hoped, I gained a lb. I'm so sick of this battle. Tired of this


----------



## BigElectricKat

I was looking up an old girlfriend the other day and I found out that she died two years ago! I was completely devastated. WTH?!?!


----------



## LeoGibson

Circumstances


----------



## agouderia

.... don't get me started on circumstances, they in 9 out of 10 cases are simply overwhelming.

Hope they all work themselves out or disappear soon for you, Leo.


----------



## da3ley

BigElectricKat said:


> I was looking up an old girlfriend the other day and I found out that she died two years ago! I was completely devastated. WTH?!?!


wow, so sorry that's a bummer.


----------



## BigElectricKat

da3ley said:


> wow, so sorry that's a bummer.


Here's the really sad part: Back when we were dating, I was going through some PTSD issues but I didn't know it at the time. Whiel I am inherently not a bad person, I didn't treat her as well as I should have and always regretted it. Over the course of the last couple of years, I had been trying to contact people that I felt I owed apologies to but could not find a way to contact her. I finally find her and she has passed away. I'll never get to tell her how much I appreciated her and that I was so sorry for breaking up with her at the time.

This has made me really concentrate on letting people in my life know how much they mean to me.


----------



## da3ley

BigElectricKat said:


> Here's the really sad part: Back when we were dating, I was going through some PTSD issues but I didn't know it at the time. Whiel I am inherently not a bad person, I didn't treat her as well as I should have and always regretted it. Over the course of the last couple of years, I had been trying to contact people that I felt I owed apologies to but could not find a way to contact her. I finally find her and she has passed away. I'll never get to tell her how much I appreciated her and that I was so sorry for breaking up with her at the time.
> 
> This has made me really concentrate on letting people in my life know how much they mean to me.


Yeah but at least you're a good enough person to recognize your failings and tried to make it right. This shows integrity. This is a great thing.


----------



## BountifulBabs

BigElectricKat said:


> I was looking up an old girlfriend the other day and I found out that she died two years ago! I was completely devastated. WTH?!?!


I'm sorry.


----------



## BountifulBabs

I was thinking about a friend I really cared about who passed away about a year and a half ago. Every day, I wish he was still here.


----------



## Tad

Just heard that a former co-worker (worked with him for several years, and his son had done some work at our company too ) died of an accident that happened doing some sort of property maintenance. Just so shocking to have someone just gone like that.


----------



## BigElectricKat

Tad said:


> Just heard that a former co-worker (worked with him for several years, and his son had done some work at our company too ) died of an accident that happened doing some sort of property maintenance. Just so shocking to have someone just gone like that.


I'm so sorry.


----------



## DragonFly

Tad said:


> Just heard that a former co-worker (worked with him for several years, and his son had done some work at our company too ) died of an accident that happened doing some sort of property maintenance. Just so shocking to have someone just gone like that.


So sorry Tad, that is so very sad.


----------



## rellis10

Absolutely desperate to move into a new flat, but we're on hold because my friend and soon-to-be housemate's reference is stuck is red tape. Such a drag when all we want is to get this sorted and arrange an actual move in date.


----------



## LizzieJones

My camera just up and died. I've had it since 2003 so I guess I should be happy it lasted so long. RIP Olympus C-750


----------



## BigElectricKat

Sad that my friend's camera died.


----------



## Tracyarts

It's alumni weekend at my university, they've been making all kinds of social media posts. I found out that a close friend from '89-'91 died a few months ago. He and I lost touch when he moved away in the mid 90s but I never forgot him. He had some serious health challenges from a birth defect but seemed to be doing well in adulthood. He only made it to 54 though. Which, to be fair, was a much longer life than was ever expected for him. But still very sad to know he's no longer with us.

He loved movies, loved 70s and early 80s music, loved coffee and loved the beach. We saw some great concerts together. Stevie Nicks, Tom Petty, and James Taylor. And too many movies to count. Although he was partial to John Waters films, and disturbingly, knew every line in both The Shining and The Exorcist. He was a barista in one of the first coffee shops in the area, his dream job. He and I spent many afternoons studying together on the beach then stopping at Denny's for a late night supper on the way back to town. He called everybody "honey" but never came across as condescending. He always greeted me with a chirpy "Oh, hey, honey" and kiss on both cheeks.

I really regret not keeping up with him, but he wasn't one for social media or even phone calls. He preferred to just socialize in person.

I just remembered, I still have a couple of mixtapes he made me. Fleetwood Mac, Van Morrison, James Taylor, Steely Dan, Genesis, and Tom Petty. I will have to somehow transfer them to digital, or at least make a playlist of the songs.


----------



## LoveDDD

I lost two great men last year - a lion guardian lover friend and a teddy bear tech geek cuddler. Valentines day ads from hotels and local spots are making me feel the sad bad...


----------



## Jay78

Winter


----------



## LizzieJones

Plumbing problems today.


----------



## BigElectricKat

LizzieJones said:


> Plumbing problems today.


Hopefully soon you be seeing some "plumber's crack" while they fix your problem.


----------



## Emmy

Sitting at work next to my very pregnant co worker, listening to her complain about how fat she is getting. Then listening to all my other coworkers chime in about it... Not necessarily sad but, its not "repulisve" ..ladies... there are worse things you could be than fat!


----------



## BigElectricKat

Emmy said:


> Sitting at work next to my very pregnant co worker, listening to her complain about how fat she is getting. Then listening to all my other coworkers chime in about it... Not necessarily sad but, its not "repulisve" ..ladies... there are worse things you could be than fat!


Right. You could be fat AND black like me!


----------



## Emmy

BigElectricKat said:


> Right. You could be fat AND black like me!


 I was thinking more like "ugly" they could be ugly lol


----------



## BigElectricKat

Emmy said:


> I was thinking more like "ugly" they could be ugly lol


Well, I'm that too (apparently) but I didn't want to cause an uproar.


----------



## Emmy

BigElectricKat said:


> Well, I'm that too (apparently) but I didn't want to cause an uproar.


No youre not  stop that nonsense lol


----------



## HUGEisElegant

Emmy said:


> Sitting at work next to my very pregnant co worker, listening to her complain about how fat she is getting. Then listening to all my other coworkers chime in about it... Not necessarily sad but, its not "repulisve" ..ladies... there are worse things you could be than fat!



Ugh! _Totally_ agreed! I've heard women and young girls complaining about being 5 or 10 pounds "overweight" and it drives me insane. It's gotten to the point where so many women feel they all need to be super fit or a size 2 to be "worthy" as a woman; almost as if being fit or having a little fat is what solely determines their self-esteem and happiness in life. *sighs* This culture of vanity insanity is so incredibly unhealthy for us all and it really needs to stop. All it does it damage people's self-worth and creates divisiveness to be able to truly See, accept and love people the way they are. It not only distorts people's view of others, but it causes their thoughts to be directed inwardly in a negative way in how we view ourselves. The worst part is that this intense culture of vanity insanity is directed toward women _*so*_ much worse than guys, which tends to culminate in the types of conversations you heard today. It's so incredibly sad.


----------



## Emmy

HUGEisElegant said:


> Ugh! _Totally_ agreed! I've heard women and young girls complaining about being 5 or 10 pounds "overweight" and it drives me insane. It's gotten to the point where so many women feel they all need to be super fit or a size 2 to be "worthy" as a woman; almost as if being fit or having a little fat is what solely determines their self-esteem and happiness in life. *sighs* This culture of vanity insanity is so incredibly unhealthy for us all and it really needs to stop. All it does it damage people's self-worth and creates divisiveness to be able to truly See, accept and love people the way they are. It not only distorts people's view of others, but it causes their thoughts to be directed inwardly in a negative way in how we view ourselves. The worst part is that this intense culture of vanity insanity is directed toward women _*so*_ much worse than guys, which tends to culminate in the types of conversations you heard today. It's so incredibly sad.


As if shed know what to do with an ass if she got one! im feeling better lol


----------



## HUGEisElegant

Emmy said:


> As if shed know what to do with an ass if she got one! im feeling better lol



LOL! You literally just made me laugh out loud.  Good to hear you're feeling better about it all though.


----------



## Sidhuriel

The predicted heatwave for next week.. ugh


----------



## DragonFly

BigElectricKat said:


> Well, I'm that too (apparently) but I didn't want to cause an uproar.


BEK stop that right now!!!! You are a cutie and that is that!


----------



## DragonFly

HUGEisElegant said:


> Ugh! _Totally_ agreed! I've heard women and young girls complaining about being 5 or 10 pounds "overweight" and it drives me insane. It's gotten to the point where so many women feel they all need to be super fit or a size 2 to be "worthy" as a woman; almost as if being fit or having a little fat is what solely determines their self-esteem and happiness in life. *sighs* This culture of vanity insanity is so incredibly unhealthy for us all and it really needs to stop. All it does it damage people's self-worth and creates divisiveness to be able to truly See, accept and love people the way they are. It not only distorts people's view of others, but it causes their thoughts to be directed inwardly in a negative way in how we view ourselves. The worst part is that this intense culture of vanity insanity is directed toward women _*so*_ much worse than guys, which tends to culminate in the types of conversations you heard today. It's so incredibly sad.


Even employers are putting on the pressure with discounted health insurance for using a fit bit and doing a certain amount of step.


----------



## HUGEisElegant

DragonFly said:


> Even employers are putting on the pressure with discounted health insurance for using a fit bit and doing a certain amount of step.



I know, I've heard about that too. It's sheer insanity. We have enough pressures from society all around us, the last thing we need is more pressures at work as well. It's just not right.


----------



## Adamantoise

General anxiety, confidence issues, self disgust. Blood pressure was high, so I'm trying to eat better and lose a bit of weight to combat it. I've been feeling awful lately, generally upset and whatnot. I broke down in front of my mother a week or two ago, I just felt so bad. I was fighting with myself to even post this. I'm just trying to be good for a change.


----------



## Tad

Adamantoise said:


> General anxiety, confidence issues, self disgust. Blood pressure was high, so I'm trying to eat better and lose a bit of weight to combat it. I've been feeling awful lately, generally upset and whatnot. I broke down in front of my mother a week or two ago, I just felt so bad. I was fighting with myself to even post this. I'm just trying to be good for a change.


Good luck! Feel free to vent here.


----------



## Sonic Purity

Apologies for restarting this thread after its thankfully long rest, but this is really bothering me:


Less restrictive searches have plenty of articles about living without a _cell_ phone or without a _land_ phone, but only a couple about no telephone at all—and even those had phone numbers in things like Google Voice, converting to emails, and were temporary experiments, not forever living (as i seek).

Hate voice telephones—hate them—always have. Never wanted one. But apparently it is no longer possible to be a part of society (in the U.S. at least) without one.

Have had a traditional hardwired “land” line for decades. Don’t like it, but it was the least-worst option, and unlike Internet and cellular, still has some vague semblance of reliability during many major disasters.

AT&T (my hardwired provider going back to my grandparents in this house circa 1960) has been cooking the frog for years: slowly turning up the rates until the holdouts like me give up. Significant price increase this month, even bigger next month. I do not use the telephone except when forced to, and for the Mom Hotline, since she won’t use anything else.

Starting next month, the price is officially too high. This frog is cooked.

Economically i’m qualified for Lifeline and would do that if they’d let me, but they want proof that i’m on public assistance, and so far i’m not (despite no income), so i can’t give them the proof they require.

Ignoring economic issues (and that’s a significant consideration), i do not want to buy into the whole “smart” device culture: no interest in paying for a tracking device to serve others more than me, and be forced to upgrade when outside forces decide my device is obsolete and no longer operable because their bu$ine$$ model requires that i pay them more money and buy a new one.

Cannot tell you how much i hate Google/Alphabet, so anything related to them is off the table for me.

Likely i’ll move the number onto some VOIP service. Haven’t wanted to go there since when (not if) the home Internet service goes down, i’m totally disconnected from the world in terms of electronic communications. This is the only thing appealing to me about cellular: some shards of redundancy/backup.


What kind of world is this where you can’t even be on the fringes of society without a telephone number?!

Anyone else dealt with this? Any workarounds/suggestions?


----------



## Munchausen

Sonic Purity said:


> Likely i’ll move the number onto some VOIP service. Haven’t wanted to go there since when (not if) the home Internet service goes down, i’m totally disconnected from the world in terms of electronic communications. This is the only thing appealing to me about cellular: some shards of redundancy/backup.
> 
> 
> What kind of world is this where you can’t even be on the fringes of society without a telephone number?!
> 
> Anyone else dealt with this? Any workarounds/suggestions?



I hate to say it @Sonic Purity but I think you've got the right idea with VOIP. It looks to me like the lesser of the evils for your situation. I do feel a bit of your pain. Where I live, I need long-range antennae and amplifiers just to get cell reception and internet.

They really are putting the squeeze on those of us that can't get a hold of the absolute newest tech (or those that would rather not).

I hope you can get things sorted out without too much pain.


----------



## Tracyarts

Social isolation. The fact that I'm a medically high risk person living in an area where hardly anyone takes the pandemic seriously, so I have to stay home to protect myself. It's been hard. I miss being around people and going out and doing normal things. 

Financial uncertainty. My husband's independently owned company is in the process of being sold to and absorbed by a large corporation. His HR director called and talked to him about it and said his name was on the recommended list to stay on with the new company, but he won't know for sure until the end of the month when he's either laid off or offered a new employment contract. So, in the meanwhile he has been looking for Plan B options. I'm not physically or mentally up to working outside of the home now, but ineligible for any kind of disability benefits, so aside from selling random crafted items and selling things I don't want anymore, I'm kind of useless in terms of helping build up the emergency fund. It's not completely dire, we won't end up homeless if he's not kept on with the new company, but we may have to struggle for a while until he finds something else. And I'm too old and sick to face it as well as I could in the past.


----------



## Tracyarts

Well, this is bullshit. The new owner laid off *everybody* from my husband's company this morning and said that they will invite select employees to interview for their old jobs in early 2021. So that's that. My husband said nope, he's not wasting his time waiting around to be invited back, he's taking the opportunity to look for something else. We're okay for now, and should make it through this just fine, but it's still a big disappointment. We had hoped the new company would at least keep everyone on until the end of the year. 

This isn't pandemic economic depression related. Insurance companies are doing fairly well now. This is corporate bullshit, not a case of "we had no choice".


----------



## Tad

That sucks, Tracy. I agree with him, sounds better to find a new place than to work with a place with that sort of attitude :-/


----------



## Munchausen

Absolutely what @Tad said. If they don't care about people now, they likely won't in the future either. And like you said, @Tracyarts, insurance companies should be doing fairly well, so your husband should hopefully be able to find something better.

I do very much wish that there was pressure on companies to treat workers better.


----------



## penguin

I’m sad because I miss the guy I’m involved with. Things are on pause for a little bit due to reasons, and I can’t do anything to help.


----------



## Pattie Vincent

I am sad because I will not be able to celebrate the holidays with my parents and siblings, due to this covid virus.


----------



## Colonial Warrior

Pattie Vincent said:


> I am sad because I will not be able to celebrate the holidays with my parents and siblings, due to this covid virus.



My best wishes this will end very soon!


----------



## penguin

As I’ve mentioned elsewhere, depression has been a right beast this week and today was worse. Since it’s just my daughter and me today, I decided to forgo the Christmas dinner I had planned because I didn’t feel up to cooking (or doing the cleaning that would be required before and after). There’s plenty of food for her to graze on, and she’s happy playing games and stuff while I’ve spent the afternoon in bed.

You know things are bad when you have all your favourite foods and you don’t have any appetite, and when you finally do start eating you’re no longer in the mood for it.


----------



## Colonial Warrior

penguin said:


> As I’ve mentioned elsewhere, depression has been a right beast this week and today was worse. Since it’s just my daughter and me today, I decided to forgo the Christmas dinner I had planned because I didn’t feel up to cooking (or doing the cleaning that would be required before and after). There’s plenty of food for her to graze on, and she’s happy playing games and stuff while I’ve spent the afternoon in bed.
> 
> You know things are bad when you have all your favourite foods and you don’t have any appetite, and when you finally do start eating you’re no longer in the mood for it.


My best hopes you will be better soon.


----------



## Barrett

penguin said:


> As I’ve mentioned elsewhere, depression has been a right beast this week and today was worse. Since it’s just my daughter and me today, I decided to forgo the Christmas dinner I had planned because I didn’t feel up to cooking (or doing the cleaning that would be required before and after). There’s plenty of food for her to graze on, and she’s happy playing games and stuff while I’ve spent the afternoon in bed.
> 
> You know things are bad when you have all your favourite foods and you don’t have any appetite, and when you finally do start eating you’re no longer in the mood for it.



I've dealt with chronic deep depression my entire life, so I understand how you feel.
It is actually the driving force behind my 100+ pound weight gain this year.

But while comfort-eating is a big thing for me, depression can also kill my appetite just as easily. I've actually dropped 13-15 pounds since I crossed that weight-gain milestone back in October, because my appetite has fallen off.

I'm guessing the recent change in the "tone" of this depression cycle is rooted in a kind of PTSD that I'm still feeling from 2016. 

My dad was diagnosed, out-of-the-blue, on a Sunday night in early November 2016 with Stage 4 lung cancer that had metastasized to his brain (they stopped counting the tumors in his head when they hit 25; there were many more than that).
He and my mother divorced in 1984 and he had been playing "hermit" since he retired in 2014 (he lived alone), so nobody had a clue that he was even sick, prior to my sister getting a surprise call from his next door neighbor, who was also in the dark and had gone over to help my dad after he had fallen and couldn't get back up (the tumors in his head had destroyed his ability to balance and he was weak from not eating for who knows how long.)

He underwent brain surgery two days later, on Election Day, to remove three big tumors that were blocking the spinal fluid from leaving his brain.
After that, he was in and out of the hospital all through that holiday season. 
He was still in post-op physical therapy on Thanksgiving Day, but we ended up being forced to bring him home because he couldn't complete his sessions and they needed the bed. So we had to care for him at home, which was a 24/7 ordeal (my mother moved in with him and I slept there) because he couldn't stand or do much of anything else without assistance. Even communicating was almost impossible, because his head was still loaded with tumors and his speech had devolved almost to complete gibberish (he couldn't find the proper words). Unfortunately, he never regained any of his prior strength, despite the docs giving him "maybe a year," if he made it through radiation and chemo. His last radiation treatment was a few days before Christmas, and we were going to let him recover for three weeks before starting chemo, but he went back into the ER via ambulance on Christmas Eve night because he had slipped into V-Fib and couldn't catch his breath.
We stopped treatment late on Christmas Day and they put him on a morphine drip, and he passed away in the hospital two days after Christmas. He was 67.
I've had... difficulty... with the holiday season ever since.

We aren't having family dinner today out of caution for COVID (my sister and her husband and my mother are high-risk), but my mother and I are having roast turkey breast and thighs, with dressing and turnips, and I plan to eat the hell out of that because I'm just flippin' hungry right now after not eating much all week.


----------



## DazzlingAnna

@Barrett : 2016 has been the worst year in my life. Not even close to 2020. Similar circumstances with both of my parents. For me, only a few events could make any year worse than 2016.

***

Today I was celebrating and eating the Christmas lunch (which used to be the bigger deal than dinner in our family tradition) alone. All over sudden everyone else wasn't hungry anymore.

I am trying to see the positive aspects - more very good food for me.


----------



## Colonial Warrior

DazzlingAnna said:


> @Barrett : 2016 has been the worst year in my life. Not even close to 2020. Similar circumstances with both of my parents. For me, only a few events could make any year worse than 2016.
> 
> ***
> 
> Today I was celebrating and eating the Christmas lunch (which used to be the bigger deal than dinner in our family tradition) alone. All over sudden everyone else wasn't hungry anymore.
> 
> I am trying to see the positive aspects - more very good food for me.


You always have the right words, Anna!

I'm also struggling with depression but it's nice to have friends here to share with. 

I just know about gaining weight due to depression. Before my graduation from college in 1996, my weight was about 220 to 230 pounds. Due problems with discrimination, I began to eat more to cope with my feelings of unworthiness. Now I'm 354.

In the ending of last year, I knew someone here who made me feel very high but due to a misunderstanding, it (the problem, not the lady) made me feel like I'm very miserable. I'm trying to fix the whole mess but it seems like things doesn't gonna work.

Now I deal with my depression by listening and sharing good music (mostly from the 60s to the 90s) with some of you. Here is one of those:


----------



## penguin

I’m not sure that sad is the right word for what I’m feeling, but I couldn’t find another thread more suitable for it. I recently opened up and shared some things with the guy I’m involved with, about stuff that happened when I was with my daughter’s father. Stuff I hadn’t told anyone else, even my closest friends. It took years for my mindset to change from “he mistreated me” to “he abused me”, and I did tell some of my friends about the emotional abuse and manipulation and the physical intimidation and threats. But the rest of it, I kept to myself (even now I’m having trouble putting a name on some of what he did, with “sexual coercion” being the closest, but there were definitely times he did things I didn’t want to do).

I’ve been thinking a lot about things that happened during our relationship and how some of it still affects me. My brain is being oh so helpful by pulling out the files on all these other incidents and dumping them on the table. “There was this...and that...don’t forget when he did...” We broke up in 2003 but he continued to manipulate me for another two years, and then he made life hell after I got pregnant to him in 2006, and for years after our daughter was born.

I guess I never tried to process things properly before, just shoved them under the mental rug. But I can see how much all of that still affects me, how I usually keep a barrier up, and how terrifying it can be to let someone get close. There’s a jumble of memories and feelings and I guess it’s good to work through them, but it’s a bit overwhelming, especially when mixed with other stuff going on in my life. It does make me want to shove those thoughts away and never think of them again, but I know I need to deal with them.


----------



## littlefairywren

penguin said:


> I’m not sure that sad is the right word for what I’m feeling, but I couldn’t find another thread more suitable for it. I recently opened up and shared some things with the guy I’m involved with, about stuff that happened when I was with my daughter’s father. Stuff I hadn’t told anyone else, even my closest friends. It took years for my mindset to change from “he mistreated me” to “he abused me”, and I did tell some of my friends about the emotional abuse and manipulation and the physical intimidation and threats. But the rest of it, I kept to myself (even now I’m having trouble putting a name on some of what he did, with “sexual coercion” being the closest, but there were definitely times he did things I didn’t want to do).
> 
> I’ve been thinking a lot about things that happened during our relationship and how some of it still affects me. My brain is being oh so helpful by pulling out the files on all these other incidents and dumping them on the table. “There was this...and that...don’t forget when he did...” We broke up in 2003 but he continued to manipulate me for another two years, and then he made life hell after I got pregnant to him in 2006, and for years after our daughter was born.
> 
> I guess I never tried to process things properly before, just shoved them under the mental rug. But I can see how much all of that still affects me, how I usually keep a barrier up, and how terrifying it can be to let someone get close. There’s a jumble of memories and feelings and I guess it’s good to work through them, but it’s a bit overwhelming, especially when mixed with other stuff going on in my life. It does make me want to shove those thoughts away and never think of them again, but I know I need to deal with them.


Just a bit too relatable 

(((((penguin)))))


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## Colonial Warrior

penguin said:


> I’m not sure that sad is the right word for what I’m feeling, but I couldn’t find another thread more suitable for it. I recently opened up and shared some things with the guy I’m involved with, about stuff that happened when I was with my daughter’s father. Stuff I hadn’t told anyone else, even my closest friends. It took years for my mindset to change from “he mistreated me” to “he abused me”, and I did tell some of my friends about the emotional abuse and manipulation and the physical intimidation and threats. But the rest of it, I kept to myself (even now I’m having trouble putting a name on some of what he did, with “sexual coercion” being the closest, but there were definitely times he did things I didn’t want to do).
> 
> I’ve been thinking a lot about things that happened during our relationship and how some of it still affects me. My brain is being oh so helpful by pulling out the files on all these other incidents and dumping them on the table. “There was this...and that...don’t forget when he did...” We broke up in 2003 but he continued to manipulate me for another two years, and then he made life hell after I got pregnant to him in 2006, and for years after our daughter was born.
> 
> I guess I never tried to process things properly before, just shoved them under the mental rug. But I can see how much all of that still affects me, how I usually keep a barrier up, and how terrifying it can be to let someone get close. There’s a jumble of memories and feelings and I guess it’s good to work through them, but it’s a bit overwhelming, especially when mixed with other stuff going on in my life. It does make me want to shove those thoughts away and never think of them again, but I know I need to deal with them.


It is something that happens to me. In this recent years, I have been opened myself to remember and sharing things that happened to me when I was In my teens.

Some people here knows my most terrible experience in some kind of abuse I have suffered when I was about 14. A thing I have had hidden inside me for decades and never had the guts to tell anyone. Even never told to a psychologist.

At the time I entered senior high school, my mother also entered in a relationship with a poor excuse of a man. A drunken, a brawler, and a sex pervert. And also I can add a manipulator.

He was part of our lives until I grew up enough to fight with him. In addition, I suffered many intents of abuse because of my fatness. Specially for the size of my breasts.

Most of my memories of senior high school years are the ones of a living hell.

Recently I met someone here who made me remember the times before my life was turned in a whole mess.

She made me remember a girl who was my first FA awareness. I tried to tell her how wonderful she made me feel. Even I researched for her outside here and told her how I did it.

She told me she was not mad at me for that. Then I told her some of my most terrible experiences. Not the whole thing. She promised me to write a more longer message soon but still I am waiting more than a month ago.

I think she is scared about me and perhaps she was right. I was not perfect and I have a very hard backstory. 

For years I used to feel myself like a monster. Then for my physical appearance but by now for my life itself.

I'm sure I'm not interested in approaching a woman or anyone to make damage to her. It isn't on my heart.

In this days, I remember some of my friends who gave me the chance to prove I'm not a monster.

Some of them passed away. It's the reason I am not in the mood to celebrate. I just want to thank all of you at Dims including you, @penguin for giving me the chance to share with someone like me. I just want someday you will find someone who appreciate you no matter your past experiences!


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## penguin

I used to tell myself that things happened with him because I was “young and dumb”, but that’s not true. Whatever faults I had and problems I caused in the relationship, he was still manipulative and abusive. I believed that no one else would want me or love me, that that would be the only relationship I’d have. I have long since been able to convince myself that wasn’t true, but other issues linger.

Hugs to @Colonial Warrior and @littlefairywren.


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## Barbsjw

I'm disappointed that a campus event I always participate in, the Next Step diversity conference, will either be cancelled or go virtual this year.


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## AmyJo1976

penguin said:


> I used to tell myself that things happened with him because I was “young and dumb”, but that’s not true. Whatever faults I had and problems I caused in the relationship, he was still manipulative and abusive. I believed that no one else would want me or love me, that that would be the only relationship I’d have. I have long since been able to convince myself that wasn’t true, but other issues linger.
> 
> Hugs to @Colonial Warrior and @littlefairywren.


It takes time to get over a traumatic experience, some longer than others, but it's possible. I think most of us sisters, as specially the older ones have had similar experiences in our life. I try to look at it as a growing experience because you'll see it coming the next time before it's too late. We are all here to support you, as specially in a time of need


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## penguin

Thank you, @AmyJo1976


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## kinkykitten

Life


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## littlefairywren

It's not a reason to be sad (more disappointed), because I ordered some makeup online and the colour is really off. I did a colour comparison with my usual line and was matched with Alabaster. I've been sent their idea of what that means, but it's only possible if Alabaster was dipped in Cheetos powder. Back to the drawing board.


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## AuntHen

littlefairywren said:


> It's not a reason to be sad (more disappointed), because I ordered some makeup online and the colour is really off. I did a colour comparison with my usual line and was matched with Alabaster. I've been sent their idea of what that means, but it's only possible if Alabaster was dipped in Cheetos powder. Back to the drawing board.



I feel like you need to cross post to the pissed off thread


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## Tad

littlefairywren said:


> It's not a reason to be sad (more disappointed), because I ordered some makeup online and the colour is really off. I did a colour comparison with my usual line and was matched with Alabaster. I've been sent their idea of what that means, but it's only possible if Alabaster was dipped in Cheetos powder. Back to the drawing board.


That sounds so frustrating! I hate ordering on-line mostly because colors (and textures) can be so hard to tell.


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## penguin

Heartbreak.


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## Tad

penguin said:


> Heartbreak.


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## AuntHen

penguin said:


> Heartbreak.


Sorry you are feeling that penguin. (((Hugs)))


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## littlefairywren

(((((@penguin)))))


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## Colonial Warrior

penguin said:


> Heartbreak.


My best wishes you will recover soon!


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## penguin

Thanks everyone. Not all relationships last and I’m really sad about that, but I still appreciate him and what we had.


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## jrose123

I have my cross to bear. Rheumatoid arthritis is a bitch. Immobility might be a goal for some (no criticism intended), but I got things to do. This pandemic just makes me more aware that I got things to do, places to see, and more to become. I got to move for that.


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## Colonial Warrior

In just a few hours there will be this year's Superbowl in Tampa, FL. 

I don't know too much about American football save for an electronic one I got.

In this season, the New Orleans' Saints were very close to make it but they didn't.

I just remember a friend of mine who passed away in 2013. A fan of the Saints.

Today I remember the Saints didn't make the Superbowl but my sweet angel Donna is resting in peace of the Lord in the highest of the heavens.

There will be a next season to dream in!


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## Tad

I'm starting on a new project that I was a bit excited for. Part of that was getting added to a conference call at 7am once a week, to start picking up the project from my manager. OK, 7am is rough for me, but worth it to make this happen.

In the first two minutes of the call my manager (who is generally very chill) and the other group in the call completely fell apart on objectives and have been arguing for an hour now. I've mostly held my tongue, and it sounds like there are some fundamental disagreements and lack of common ground between the groups. So my exciting new project is looking like it is going to be a few months of pain.


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## Angelette

Today was a bad day. I would've wrote a longer message, but my mind is cluttered. It seems my BHM crush isn't into me. Got made fun of on Discord. Cherry on top, my dad got mad at me over a small mistake.
I want to cry but I'm in the car, so I can't.


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## MattB

Another man down, the one we thought was invincible.


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## Donna

what ifs


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## CurvyEm2

I've got a hurty knee so I've had to cancel something important for tomorrow because I can't drive as I can barely move my leg.


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## Jay78

Life and the fact that I can’t just handle it


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## Donna

Hurricane Ian; the storm destroyed the place where my husband and I were married. I will get over that, but the fact that so many of my friends, family, & former colleagues lost so much through no fault of their own is not something I will get over quickly.


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## Angelette

I would say but I'm too sad right now. Condensed context, I left a website that used to be my safe space. But now I had the final straw.


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## Angelette

Hiding in my bedroom from my dad. That's great.


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## Donna

German novelist Hermann Hesse said, “If you hate a person, you hate something in him that is part of yourself. What isn't part of ourselves doesn't disturb us.” More commonly it's said: _what we hate in others is what we hate in ourselves_. I've been meditating on love and hate, and what I'm discovering about myself is making me very disappointed in me.


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## kyle

Not to be Debbie Downer here, but ... Have to put one of my horses down tomorrow.

He has an incurable neurological disease. Tried everything, but he's getting progressively worse. Can barely walk now. Vet said it will get worse. Don't want him to suffer through the Winter (even here in Virginia).

Had him for 19 years. I was there in the stall when he was born. Imprinted him and everything. (his mother tried to kill me LOL)

He's a registered Warmblood (Hanoverian) and back in the day he was a real Bad Ass.

So raise a glass ... Gonna give him a great Irish funeral.


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## MasterMike

Kevin Conroy, the definitive voice of The Batman from the DC Animated Universe and the Arkham games; has passed on into legend. He so perfectly embodied the Dark Knight Detective that his became the voice I heard in my head when I read Batman's lines in the comics (same thing with Mark Hamill as The Joker). R.I.P. 
In Memoriam, Kevin Conroy by Michael Uslan - BATMAN ON FILM


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## Angelette

Well, my dad got mad at me for locking the door when he went out to McDonald's. Even though I opened it right away while he knocks hardly like his life is going to end.

I lied and explained my reasoning for locking the door is there was a shady man walking down the street and I was afraid to get the R word. Note we live in a poor in a poor neighborhood. 

He still got pissed at me and I guess he doesn't care if I get sexually assaulted by a man.


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## svenm2112

Finding out my mom has dementia. The loss of the voice of Batman the Animated Series Kevin Conroy. The event in Utah. For young adults. Who are no older than my son. Who is 22 now. And in college. The shootings. Just sad


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## Colonial Warrior

The passing away of actress Kirstie Alley. My favorite characterization of Alley was the Lieutenant Saavik from Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan. Rest In Peace!


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## kyle

Colonial Warrior said:


> The passing away of actress Kirstie Alley. My favorite characterization of Alley was the Lieutenant Saavik from Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan. Rest In Peace!View attachment 152988


One of my favorite actresses too. Was very sorry to hear.


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## Angelette

Sadly I am considered a loser by American standards.


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## Colonial Warrior

Angelette said:


> Sadly I am considered a loser by American standards.


Why?


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## Angelette

Colonial Warrior said:


> Why?


I still live with my parents in my twenties. Which is frowned upon in American culture. Unlike let's say Asian culture.


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## Rojodi

Angelette said:


> I still live with my parents in my twenties. Which is frowned upon in American culture. Unlike let's say Asian culture.


Oh, please! Eff American "values"! These are the same "people" who frowned upon me being the stay-at-home parent - my job had ZERO health insurance, ZERO 401K, ZERO chances for advancement. 

It's your life, live it the best that you can and want!


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## Donna

I thought the whole negative attitude toward staying with parents after the age of eighteen had shifted and it’s now viewed as not just accepted, but preferred. Given the cost of everything these days, it makes financial sense to stay at home as long as you can.


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## Colonial Warrior

Angelette said:


> I still live with my parents in my twenties. Which is frowned upon in American culture. Unlike let's say Asian culture.


At my 55, I still live with my mother. I don't feel myself as a loser for that. 

As I told you before, you are still young. I have passed by almost the same things you do now, but I don't lose hope.

Today's youth have more chances of doing much more and better things than we had when I was in my early twenties. 

You have so many wonderful tools like the internet to have more exposure to your talents. 

At my 55, I don't have money in my social security for a retirement, but I don't lose hope to finding a way to develop my talents and expose them in the web for a chance to do a career on my own. 

The most difficult thing is to deal with my sleep disorders. I'm a Obstructive Sleep Apnea patient. But I try to do my best in everything I do while my moment of a big chance comes.


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## littlefairywren

I guess this is a combo sad/angry kinda thing.

I'm a carer for my now 92yr old stepfather, and the poor bugger has dementia. Each day he declines a little bit more, his memory suffers daily, and he's losing other faculties as well. He needs full time supervision. 
It's saddening to see, because I knew him as a healthy and very proud man. He's now a shell of what I once knew. 
Dementia is cruel and it makes me angry. 

And now I'm watching my 74yr old mum failing bit by bit. Her health is not good, so I'm terrified of what's to come. 
She fell over in the shops yesterday, and by some miracle she didn't break anything. I look at her, and I see my grandmother in the way she holds her body, the way she stoops in the garden. 

Watching family age is distressing (or terrifying depending on my day).


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## Angelette

My dad pretty much called me lazy when I was miserably sick all day. He brought up he did all the chores.


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## Colonial Warrior

Angelette said:


> My dad pretty much called me lazy when I was miserably sick all day. He brought up he did all the chores.


As I told you before, you need help on that abusive relationship.


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## Angelette

Lonely and depressed.


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## Jon Blaze

My brother is suffering from chronic kidney disease. A week ago he almost died from kidney failure. I'm thankful he's still here. But sad his life is drastically changing at only 42. My parents are planning on taking him in so he can get the help he needs. Unfortunately the procedures needed may be a permanent thing for the rest of his life.

It is genetic (maternally). The nephrologist recommended my sister and I get tested for the possibility of similar issues. So I am coordinating to get checked. My health isn't perfect and I do think I focus on it more than a lot of people my age. But now it's time to get more serious about it.

Kind of sad it's likely genetic in this case and I may also be at risk. I was ready to start the discussion about giving him one of my kidneys.


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## Tad

Jon Blaze said:


> My brother is suffering from chronic kidney disease.





Jon Blaze said:


> Kind of sad it's likely genetic in this case and I may also be at risk. I was ready to start the discussion about giving him one of my kidneys.


I'm so sorry for your brother, and all of the stress that this is adding to you and all of your family.


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## Angelette

I regret looking up someone's history and now I feel sad.


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## Angelette

Lol this one is petty. I got alerted on a comment on a different website even though I don't think I said anything bad. My Internet connection is sucky so I can't pull up the report at the moment


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## loopytheone

My beautiful pet cloud floated away today. I'm beyond gutted. I never even got to say goodbye as he doesn't live with me anymore. Rest in peace, Mousse.


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## Angelette

loopytheone said:


> My beautiful pet cloud floated away today. I'm beyond gutted. I never even got to say goodbye as he doesn't live with me anymore. Rest in peace, Mousse.
> 
> View attachment 153410


Aww he's adorable. So sorry you lost a dear furry friend.


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## Colonial Warrior

loopytheone said:


> My beautiful pet cloud floated away today. I'm beyond gutted. I never even got to say goodbye as he doesn't live with me anymore. Rest in peace, Mousse.
> 
> View attachment 153410


Sorry about your loss.


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## MasterMike

loopytheone said:


> My beautiful pet cloud floated away today. I'm beyond gutted. I never even got to say goodbye as he doesn't live with me anymore. Rest in peace, Mousse.
> 
> View attachment 153410


My condolences on the loss of your sweet little guinea pig.


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## Tad

So sorry, Loopy


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## Angelette

.


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## Am Jim

Found out a long time friend of mine has cancer.


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## Angelette

I almost had a panic attack in a lunch line but at least the lunch is good.


----------

