# Fat-/ Sex-Discrimination



## Scandi (FFA) (Aug 6, 2006)

*Is it a crime*
* - if a BHM are attracted to a non-BBW ?*

Now and then I do a little smalltalk in the chat here on Dimensions, and I've too many times been confront with:

- Guys who only dares to give me compliment and attention in private messages, because it's not welcome that a big guy are attracted to a girl in my size.

The opposite is okay. Lots of slim guys are attracted to BBW's, but I've never heard a BBW wondering about what those guys are doing in this forum.


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## nico7_uk (Aug 6, 2006)

Well I can be first to say I think slimmer women can look lovely, and having seen a pic of you Scandi I can honestly say you are gorgeous! 

I am lucky enough to appreciate different shapes and sizes, and have 
been out with BBW's and chubby girls and loved it! If I am thinking about a FFA or feeder though, as I tend to, I like the idea of contrast, theres something about that that drives me crazy...so slim, petite even athletic women are perfect!

I think its sad that you find there is a lack of acceptance, for as I understand it acceptance is a byword for this community! I hope it would extend all ways and to all comers personally...


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## growingman (Aug 6, 2006)

I am not really physically that attracted to heavy women and very attracted to thinner/average/fit women. I can't tell you how many times I have been flamed for being a big bellied guy and attracted to thinner women, yet so many heavy women want thin men and that seems to be fine (and it is truely fine with me). This will always frustrate me, but I will continue to post my honest feelings. There is something I find so sexy about a big bellied guy with a thinner woman, the bigger the difference the more sexy it seems to me. Others may not feel the same but that is ok. It is all about preference. I prefere women with long thick hair too, but I rarely get flamed for that. 
Steriotypes and lack of tolerance for our differences is often what BBWs say they want to stop, yet like all people often have their own prejudices. My last girlfriend was a blond German girl , thin wasted, and had large breasts. Most people looked at her and thought bimbo, yet she was a genetic engineer and brilliant. Stereo typing and lack of tolerance will always be with us I guess. Lets hope this is yet another area where people can open their minds. Thanks for posting about this Scandi.


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## Emma (Aug 6, 2006)

No I think it's perfectly acceptable for a big man to fancy slimmer women. Hell, I'm big and I only really go for slimmer men. It's all about preference. It's such a shame more BHM/FFA don't use the BHM/FA room that way there wouldn't really be any problem at all. I don't think the men should be affraid to compliment you especially because you're beautiful!


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## Scandi (FFA) (Aug 6, 2006)

*growingman:* Yes... but I've also experience that guys almost has been "attacked" by the other BBW's if they showed me or another non-BBW attention. They was told that they couldn't be truly fat admires.

And the point is, that some fat admires also have a fantasy about being feed and plump up themselves.....

I don't understand why some people are so black and white about judging others!


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## Scandi (FFA) (Aug 6, 2006)

*CurvyEm:* Thanks for posting  And you're right about the chatroom, but we're mostly in fat/gaining, and this room are suppose to be for all of us - nomatter which prefer you have :eat2:


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## Emma (Aug 6, 2006)

Scandi (FFA) said:


> *CurvyEm:* Thanks for posting  And you're right about the chatroom, but we're mostly in fat/gaining, and this room are suppose to be for all of us - nomatter which prefer you have :eat2:



Oh of course, I just meant that maybe the big men would probably be more open about complimenting thinner women in the BHM/FFA room


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## TheSadeianLinguist (Aug 6, 2006)

Scandi, you might PM Laina about this. She's a teeny tiny FFA!


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## Scandi (FFA) (Aug 6, 2006)

*CurvyEm:* Well, for this purpose is was not so much about compliment etc., but more about why were is this big difference between big men who loves thinner woman, contra big womans who loves skinny guys?


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## growingman (Aug 6, 2006)

Interesting coincidence. There is a discussion about BBWs being attracted to thin men on the weight board for those interested.
http://www.dimensionsmagazine.com/forums/showthread.php?t=323


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## butch (Aug 6, 2006)

Hi Scandi (FFA),

I would not, nor have I ever (especially since I don't spend time in the chat rooms) given any thin FFA or BHM grief for their attractions. I believe that we all have the right to be attracted to any human being above the age of 18 that we chose to be, and we have the right to be in a consensual relationship with anyone above the age of 18 that we want (outside of incest, of course).

However, as a fat woman whose strongest physical attractions are typically for fat men (although, as a bisexual, fat men are not the alpha and omega of my attractions), I can say that I sometimes think less than charitable thoughts about thin women who are with fat men, or fat men who are not attracted to fat women. I am able to adjust my attitude, and dismiss these less than nice thoughts, but they are there.

For me, they seem to spring from two areas:

1) In my observations (which may be skewed, I admit), American society seems to have less 'problems' with fat men dating thin women, and in fact this is reflected in our media, where TV shows dating back to "The Honeymooners" present fat men and thin wives as one 'typical' variety of the American married couple. Of all the fat male comedians with TV shows, I don't think one of them had a plump wife, yet in "Roseanne" the fat female comedian gets a fat husband. So I guess I 'feel' jealous that fat men get granted some levels of 'normalcy' when it comes to desirability and romance that fat women don't get. Plus, the petty part of me is pissed off that I might have to compete against a thin woman for a fat man's attention.

2) The other reason is the simple fact that in my life none of the fat guys I've expressed an interest in returned that interest. I'm not claiming that they weren't interested just because I'm fat, but, again, living in a culture that refuses to show fat women as desirable in any shape or form (outside of isolated spots like Dimensions or Mo'Nique's F.A.T. Chance), it is easy for me to make that assumption.

I want to reiterate that I am not saying that it is right to criticize anyone, fat or thin, for their desires. I am also not blaming anyone or anything else for my own jealousies or insecurities. They are mine, and I deal with them by making sure to tell myself when they show their ugly head that I have no right to expect others to act the way I want them to, and that these thoughts are no different than the hateful anti-fat comments and attitudes I deal with outside of our acceptance community.

I also have to realize that I would be hypocritical if I had such expectations for fat men or thin women, since I have been in the very uncomfortable situation of having to break things off with average-sized men because I could not find them attractive, no matter how hard I tried. This attraction thing is tricky, and in the end, I'm just happy to hear of any couple, fat, thin, in between, that have made a successful relationship out of inner and outer mutual attraction.

Plus, as many other have mentioned in many of the threads here at Dimensions, I've had experiences of being attracted to people who don't fit my external criteria because there was something about that person's inner self that was irresistible. In my case, these experiences have a funny way of transforming the outer person into the sexiest person imaginable,  .

I am sorry to hear that any FFA or BHM might be getting unwarranted criticism. I support you all, and while I don't participate much in this forum, I rely on it and appreciate the words (and photos) of those who sustain it. Thank you.


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## Laina (Aug 6, 2006)

TheSadeianLinguist said:


> Scandi, you might PM Laina about this. She's a teeny tiny FFA!



*grin* I'm FAMOUS! Well, internet famous, anyway.

I don't run into a lot of trouble with BHM regarding my dimuntive size (and some of it I simply can't help--I'm never going to be tall or broadly built)...but I do hit the basic resistance. Mostly I'll hear (over and over again) "are you sure?" or "but you're hot!". 

I'm not much for chat rooms (I hang out in them from time to time while I'm doing other stuff online), but I haven't run across many angry BBWs--maybe they're harassing the men in private messages, but I've never seen anyone bawled out in chat. In real life, though, I've noticed a trend...

Mid-sized, mid-aged BBWs. They hate me. HATE me. I have a handful of theories, most of which have nothing to do with the SA movement, because I'm pretty sure that these angry women are not yet aware that they have myriad admirers...and I think that's the problem. Outside the acceptance movement there seems to still be a feeling that fat women should date fat men (and vice versa) because that's what they _deserve_. It's unfair and untrue, but it's still around, and I think it's especially clear in the minds of women who have just reached the "point of no return". This is doubtless going to cause flames, but hear me out before you yell.

At some age, the human metabolism slows down and one of two things happens: dieting and exercise become the center of existence, or the subject puts on weight. I happen to believe this is especially noticable for women--not because of societal pressures, but because of fashion. (Stay with me now.) Men's clothing is pretty much the same from the end of highschool until the end of life--with a few notable exceptions, of course. Business attire consists of slacks, button downs, and nice shoes. If you're an executive, a jack may be required. Your evening attire is a little more upscale, but it's the same basic idea. Your colors are basic and mostly slimming (let's not get into my feelings on khaki), and if you need to mix and match a little, it's doable because everything goes by waist, inseam and shoulder. Women's fashion is completely hit-or-miss, sizing makes no sense, and once you outgrow something, it's toast. (Dresses, for example.) Not to mention, women's fasion is designed to highlight the "hot" parts of a body--breasts, butt, waist, legs, with a newfound love of showing off random body parts so that people will cock their heads to one side and say "gee, she has a lovely, um, lower rib cage". Until one ceases to fit the societal "hot" mold, one wears boob and butt baring outfits to attract members of the opposite sex. When one can no longer find such outfits in the correct size...that's it. It's on to granny panties and lots and lots of dark colors. (All of this has changed in recent years, but it's still an ongoing battle. Can a fat chick show off cleavage? Can we make low-rise jeans in size 22? Jesus, people, why not?!) Now let's add in a dash of "you have to shop in a seperate department/store" and a little bit of "your BMI is above starvation level, better get to the gym" and layer on some "Kate Moss is the ideal"--all of this creates a very "thin or me" atmosphere. In short, thin girls get everything, and they're everywhere. Worse, the young ones (like myself) still get to eat anything they want and not gain an ounce! They get hit on by hot guys, they can shop anywhere they want, they can dance in clubs and not feel silly (at best) or ridiculous (at worst) because they still feel comfy in their own skin. Thin girls look confident and attractive, just when these women are starting to lose both (at least to their minds). This isn't helped by the thin women who mock fat women for "trying to dress sexy" (Umm...trying my ass, but who'm I to say?) and store clerks who can be outright rude if you're not a size three. (For the record, they're rude anyway. I get dirty looks because my jeans aren't designer...I think those looks are just plastered on their faces.) 

Recap what I've said so far: weight gain is currently equated with "unsexy", "failure", and "getting old". All things we're very anti--at least here in the states!

Moving on. In the real world (as opposed to the internet), these women are made increasingly aware of the need to "settle down" before they become completely undesirable...and now that they themselves are not "hot", they are often encouraged to date "less dersirable" men. That's right. Fat guys. If you're fat, you date someone else who's fat, because they won't notice...or at least they'll be understanding. After all, once you get fat, you aren't allowed a preference of any sort. You take what you can get. *insert growling and sarcasm here* Never mind that women are competitive to begin with. So these hypothetical women, who have never been told that fat can be fit, not to mention that fat can be attractive, start looking for acceptable fat guys. We'll assume, because we're outside the SA scene, that these guys are in the same boat (as opposed to being FAs). Given a choice between an overweight woman who has not yet learned how to dress attractively for her weight (because no one has told her she can be hot AND fat), who may be getting more bitter by the day, and who probably doesn't have any concept of how sexy she still is; and a still-slim woman who feels comfy in her skin and still dresses to attract...the latter will probably garner more attention. Not because she's thin, but because she's confident. This goes double if we're dealing with a self-conscious BHM, because chances are that she'll strike up a conversation when he's afraid to--which makes her instantly more attractive! (Life-rafts are a beautiful sight when you think you're drowning.) To an outsider it looks like the more confident, better dressed, more pleasant girl took a guy home. To the newly-mid-sized-BBW, it looks like...you guessed it...the _thin girl_ won. Rather than admit her own failings (ie she didn't talk to him, or she wouldn't dance with him, or she was incredibly guarded all night, or even that she wasn't attracted to him and it _showed_) it is probably easier to think the guy was shallow and only wanted a "hot chick".

My assumption, because I can't speak from experience, is that this kind of feeling would carry over into the SA movement--and even the weight-gain chats. If you have just realized you can attract men "even at this size" and then a thin woman comes in and commands attention, it must be off-putting. After all, these men are supposed to be here to admire _you_! She can get guys anywhere!

And I think that's what it comes down to. The same jealousy that made it impossible to cross social lines in junior highschool--all of which came from a very natural sense of insecurity. Breaking new ground will always make people feel uneasy, and size acceptance is no different. Scandi, I don't think it's you they're angry at...and I don't, frankly, think they're angry at any one man specifically for not wanting them. It's more like...hoarding all the marbles so that you can be sure of finding the ONE you want. (Ok, or maybe I was the only one who collected marbles as a kid...totally my mother's fault!) I'm also firmly of the belief that the longer these women hang around the boards and chats, the less territorial they'll be.

*hides from flames*


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## growingman (Aug 6, 2006)

Very nicely said Laina. If I could add one small note. Anger on a man or woman is not attractive. This in itself is self defeating and will turn people away.


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## philosobear (Aug 6, 2006)

that was a long post, sailing close to the wind, but it made sense. Keep your rubber hat on, but I think you might survive!


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## Laina (Aug 6, 2006)

philosobear said:


> that was a long post, sailing close to the wind, but it made sense. Keep your rubber hat on, but I think you might survive!



*eyeroll*

Next time I'll limit it to the less friendly "newly fat chicks get bitchy because I'm still thin and they aren't", if it'll make you happy. It sums up the basic post, even if it leaves my personal beliefs completely out of the mix.


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## William (Aug 6, 2006)

Hi Scandi 

Well that is a double standard since the same is not true for thin men at BBW events. Also even borderline (on the low end) BBWs still report of receiving the cold shoulder at some BBW events.

William




Scandi (FFA) said:


> *growingman:* Yes... but I've also experience that guys almost has been "attacked" by the other BBW's if they showed me or another non-BBW attention. They was told that they couldn't be truly fat admires.
> 
> And the point is, that some fat admires also have a fantasy about being feed and plump up themselves.....
> 
> I don't understand why some people are so black and white about judging others!


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## missaf (Aug 6, 2006)

Laina's stealing all the fat men!!!   

You fat man stealer, come back here with that donut, and the fat guy! 

(I'm so kidding sweetie  )


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## Laina (Aug 6, 2006)

missaf said:


> Laina's stealing all the fat men!!!
> 
> You fat man stealer, come back here with that donut, and the fat guy!
> 
> (I'm so kidding sweetie  )



But it was such a GOOD donut. *pouts*


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## Jackoblangada (Aug 6, 2006)

I want donuts.....:eat1:


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## Laina (Aug 7, 2006)

Jackoblangada said:


> I want donuts.....:eat1:



Gotta follow me, then. Silly. After all, I'm stealing all the men. (So that, um, well, geez. What does one do with "all the men"?)


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## theRabidWolf (Aug 7, 2006)

Laina said:


> Gotta follow me, then. Silly. After all, I'm stealing all the men. (So that, um, well, geez. What does one do with "all the men"?)



What DOESN'T one do?


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## Reads4Work (Aug 7, 2006)

Scandi, I wouldn't worry about it. There are so many people with such a diverse set of tastes, you cannot please them all. When I was a little bigger, then 5'10" 240, people would want to fix me up with someone and I would specifically ask for someone who likes bigger guys and would be interested in me getting bigger (about 250-300 lbs.). I was always told the same thing, that is, if I want a woman who would like me bigger, that I would have to date large women. Now, down to 215, and just trying to eat healthy and continuing to exercise, strange how women now seem to be coming out of the woodwork not wanting me to get any smaller. 

You on the other hand appear to not only want a guy who is on the big size, and willing to play the fantasy of allowing himself to get bigger. You want to participate in that also by getting bigger yourself. I think you run into another problem and that is the stereotype of the scandinavian woman. I know when I was younger that women from Scandinavia were thought of as the most beautiful women in the world. So guys will think of you as this trophy. I think that if you openly state you are looking to gain, and want someone to gain with you, that you would get a lot of responses. However, the problem is location and finding someone either where you live, or the willingness of someone to relocate. And that seems to be a problem lots have on this site.


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## Buffetbelly (Aug 7, 2006)

William said:


> Hi Scandi
> 
> Well that is a double standard since the same is not true for thin men at BBW events. Also even borderline (on the low end) BBWs still report of receiving the cold shoulder at some BBW events.
> 
> William


 
This is a real problem! There are BBW events in every major city now, and there are loads of BBW's and loads of thin men. There are only a few BHM's and they are definitely the wallflowers. BHM's are left to themselves even though there is a predominance of females overall.

Yet, when a thin FFA or small BBW comes in, she is criticized by the larger BBW's. They assume that these smaller gals are there to compete for the most desirable (=thin) men. This is worse than a double standard --it's downright crazy!


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## jdwhitak (Aug 7, 2006)

Scandi,

I don't know if it was in this thread or another, but I remember you saying that you've never had a fat boyfriend. Is that right? If so why not? I think its weird for you to have this preference, yet never have a boyfriend that has the qualities that you prefer.


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## Scandi (FFA) (Aug 7, 2006)

jdwhitak said:


> Scandi,
> 
> I don't know if it was in this thread or another, but I remember you saying that you've never had a fat boyfriend. Is that right? If so why not? I think its weird for you to have this preference, yet never have a boyfriend that has the qualities that you prefer.



Hmmm I'm getting tired of this!! Aren't people read what I'm writing?!?

I need to fall in love in the personality, and not in the shape or fantasy!

*end*


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## jdwhitak (Aug 7, 2006)

Scandi (FFA) said:


> Hmmm I'm getting tired of this!! Aren't people read what I'm writing?!?
> 
> I need to fall in love in the personality, and not in the shape or fantasy!
> 
> *end*




you should know by now that men don't pay attention to 50% or more of what women say!


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## Scandi (FFA) (Aug 7, 2006)

jdwhitak said:


> you should know by now that men don't pay attention to 50% or more of what women say!



Maybe that's why I'm living in Denmark.. We've equality!!! ;-)


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## sirumberto (Aug 7, 2006)

Scandi (FFA) said:


> Maybe that's why I'm living in Denmark.. We've equality!!! ;-)



I'm pretty sure we have equal opportunity miscommunication over here in the US too.


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## Scandi (FFA) (Aug 7, 2006)

sirumberto said:


> I'm pretty sure we have equal opportunity miscommunication over here in the US too.



And I know that is easy to say that we have equality.

Yes, but many guys would sat: No we're just like the animals, but in fact its not the answer ;-)
Many female spiders eats the man-spider after a sexual-act, and female lions are hunting etc..


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## Reenaye Starr (Aug 7, 2006)

I didn't actually read this thread before I posted mine and now I wish I had... Everyone has made really good points about physical attraction not being a choice, necessarily... For me, I am attreacted to people based on their personalities... I like boys and girls of all shapes and sizes based on the individual... There are certain types that I am predisposed to, but I can really see adorable qualities in lots of types... Maybe that is why it is hard for me personally to understand only choosing one type pf person to date... Just my own feelings :wubu:


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## Reenaye Starr (Aug 7, 2006)

Laina said:


> *eyeroll*
> 
> Next time I'll limit it to the less friendly "newly fat chicks get bitchy because I'm still thin and they aren't", if it'll make you happy. It sums up the basic post, even if it leaves my personal beliefs completely out of the mix.





LOL You are hilarious... I love you Laina! No ill will here... Infact I think you are a cutie and a half...


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## Scandi (FFA) (Aug 8, 2006)

*Buffetbelly:* It sounds like you guys need some balls. Does it gives you any satisfaction just to be a tourist on the BBW market? Fat-land is dominate by BBW's, so why don't you guys starts your own BHM-event - an event where woman (in all shapes) who adores fat guys can come?


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## Tad (Aug 8, 2006)

Laina said:


> *hides from flames*



Hardly! 

I've never wanted to give rep points more badly on these boards, but it seems I have to go rep more people before giving more to you :doh: 

Anyway, incredibly well analyzed and well written. You are a gem, and I hope you keep coming to these boards for a long time 

--Ed


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## Laina (Aug 8, 2006)

Reenaye Starr said:


> I didn't actually read this thread before I posted mine and now I wish I had... Everyone has made really good points about physical attraction not being a choice, necessarily... For me, I am attreacted to people based on their personalities... I like boys and girls of all shapes and sizes based on the individual... There are certain types that I am predisposed to, but I can really see adorable qualities in lots of types... Maybe that is why it is hard for me personally to understand only choosing one type pf person to date... Just my own feelings :wubu:



You're not alone, hun. Even while I (academically) understand, I can't imagine limiting myself to any one group of people--saying that I have a "type" would be like saying "oh, I prefer chicken". Great, of course people have tastes and preferences...but that doesn't mean it's all they eat! If I stuck strictly to "my type", I never would have met my boyfriend--and then where would I be? 

(See? I'm not stealing all the fat guys! I wouldn't be allowed to keep them, anyway.)


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## Laina (Aug 8, 2006)

Reenaye Starr said:


> LOL You are hilarious... I love you Laina! No ill will here... Infact I think you are a cutie and a half...




Yay! It would be decidedly saddening to have a hottie like you hate me.


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## Laina (Aug 8, 2006)

edx said:


> Hardly!
> 
> I've never wanted to give rep points more badly on these boards, but it seems I have to go rep more people before giving more to you :doh:
> 
> ...



Aww...thanks, hun. I've got to tell you, this makes my day. (Even if I'm not sure what "rep points" are! =P) Especially coming from someone who's always so well spoken!


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## fat_viking_bloke (Aug 8, 2006)

Scandi (FFA) said:


> *Buffetbelly:* It sounds like you guys need some balls. Does it gives you any satisfaction just to be a tourist on the BBW market? Fat-land is dominate by BBW's, so why don't you guys starts your own BHM-event - an event where woman (in all shapes) who adores fat guys can come?



That's a very good idea Scandi, that would be awesome. The reason 'fat-land' is dominated by BBW's is the simple fact that FA's are in abundance and FFA's are not. I think that this is because if a woman is fat her attractive features (e.g. hips, breasts, legs.) are enlarged and therefore enhanced. It is easy to see how a man could prefer fat women because of this. If a man is fat his features are enlarged, but these enlarged features are not simply an enhanced version of what your average woman wants, the enlarged features go against what your average woman wants.


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## Zagnut (Aug 8, 2006)

Scandi (FFA) said:


> *Is it a crime*
> * - if a BHM are attracted to a non-BBW ?*



I, for one, don't seem to be attracted to either BBWs or non-BBWs exclusively, per se. Personally, attraction has been more an aspect of whom I met that was interested in me. I'm very shy where dating and romance are concerned and I am more than thrilled that I am out of the dating scene, even though I barely considered myself in it.

Tangent aside, when it comes to pure physical attraction, there are just too many factors in how I am attracted to a woman. I have only really been with one thin woman in a sexual relationship and I felt rather awkward. I felt like I was going to break her, and it probably didn't help that she was a "lie there and do nothing" type of sexual partner, but I didn't enjoy our time together. I've generally been involved with bigger women, but had equally negative experiences with them.

Maybe it's all the influence of fetish, gothic and burlesque sources that color my sense of attractiveness, but I prefer visually a woman the is curvy and exotic, with a definite notice of raven-headed and red-headed women. I love a woman who has a noticeable womanly figure whether natural or assisted into shape via a corset. 

As for my tactile sensualities, I'd much rather wrap my arms around a much more rubenesque woman. I love the feel of a soft warm body, devoid of ribs and elbows.

I've seen a lot of women who where bigger derided for being so whom I thought were stunning and could have even been bigger and still so. Others who are ridiculously thin who were applauded have garnered much the opposite reaction from me. 

What does that make me? I don't know. I could find nearly any woman beautiful if she is so on the inside. I can also find a universally judged perfect beauty to be quite revolting if she is in possession of a cruel heart. If I'd only had some positive experiences with thin woman, maybe I'd be inclined to find them more attractive, in ways more than pure visual aethetics.

Then again, I've had some really bad experiences with BBWs. Damn, I'm glad I have my current girlfriend in my life!

Zagnut


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## swordchick (Aug 8, 2006)

I have no problem with a BHM being attracted to a thin FFA. I think it is great. Not reading this thread before, I complimented Scandi in the chatroom. There are beautiful, intelligent, wonderful thin women in the forums and I love that.


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## theRabidWolf (Aug 8, 2006)

swordchick said:


> I have no problem with a BHM being attracted to a thin FFA. I think it is great. Not reading this thread before, I complimented Scandi in the chatroom. There are beautiful, intelligent, wonderful thin women in the forums and I love that.




While we're on the subject, we gotta get more of these FFA's into the chat room.

I'm sure Scandi is getting lonely with just us guys there...or maybe not...


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## Scandi (FFA) (Aug 9, 2006)

theRabidWolf said:


> I'm sure Scandi is getting lonely with just us guys there...or maybe not...



Maybe not, lol :eat2: :eat2:


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## Buffetbelly (Aug 9, 2006)

Scandi (FFA) said:


> *Buffetbelly:* It sounds like you guys need some balls. Does it gives you any satisfaction just to be a tourist on the BBW market? Fat-land is dominate by BBW's, so why don't you guys starts your own BHM-event - an event where woman (in all shapes) who adores fat guys can come?


 
Being in the over-40 demographic, I'm not the one to lead up such a movement. 

It's also just possible that BHM's and their personalities might have something to do with the whole wallflower thing. It might not be all imposed by those thin-admiring BBW's. Some of us are nerds and others are geeks and most of us are awkward. We have been on the sidelines socially all our lives.


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## Buffetbelly (Aug 9, 2006)

Laina said:


> (See? I'm not stealing all the fat guys! I wouldn't be allowed to keep them, anyway.)


 
You have to throw back the little ones, you know! You can only keep the fully grown ones.


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## Laina (Aug 9, 2006)

Buffetbelly said:


> You have to throw back the little ones, you know! You can only keep the fully grown ones.



*giggle* Boyfriend gets touchy if I try to keep ANY of them. I'll tell you, though, it's still a trip to hear "you're staring at him because he's fatter than me, aren't you?".


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## inona (Aug 10, 2006)

Hi, Scandi - I have read your posts while lurking and the threads you start are interesting. Hopefully we would respect anyone's preference for fat or thin, gay or straight, including a BHM's preference for a smaller or thinner woman.


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