# OK, This IS a Fantasy Issue



## fatlane (Sep 1, 2006)

WARNING: KELLIGRL CONTENT, BUT NOT LIKE YOU MAY BE THINKING

A little bird shot me a link to http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=98250206 and asked me what I thought of it.

I went there and looked it over. My reaction, and that of the little bird's, was that this wasn't Kelligrl. Both of us had exchanged emails with her back in the day, and the copy on this site read more like a crazed male youth than the style we remember Kelligrl having. That, and the fact there wasn't even a single new image, not even a face shot. There were inconsistencies in the life story presented here and the one we recalled. This ain't Kelligrl's Myspace, I'm sad to conclude.

If I'm wrong, I'd like to be proven wrong. But to anyone who thinks it's the real McKell, I'd proceed with caution until there's actual proof this is someone other than a young feller crazed by a bygone age and using an assumed identity to phish for pix.

I don't want to judge whoever it is posing as KG, but I do want to call out what seems to be a misleading site. Some posted there thinking it was a for-reals place, and I don't think the charade should extend that far. Again, if I'm wrong, I'll apologize profusely. If I'm not, then let's realize it's a site that is just a fantasy, not a reality.


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## altered states (Sep 2, 2006)

Ya know, I've been really, really trying to get over Kelligirl. I have about 27 gigs worth of pix of her, and yet whenever I'm cruising and see her smile, I think, whoa, hey, is that a new one? No, it isn't, but I'm hopeless that way. I lust after her deeply even though she ripped me off and the issues I did get of her 'zine were horrible to begin with. So then some putz puts on a wig and stuffs a few pillows in his pajamas and opens up a myspace, or a yahoo group, or whatever, and for just an instant, before my cortex fires up, I have this spark of hope. SHE'S BACK. She disappeared and came back before... it can happen again.... Can't it?


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## fatlane (Sep 2, 2006)

It can happen, and that's why frauds like this are so damn painful.

You can cry to me, Tres. I'm so damn secure in my manhood, I could help a thousand men cry.



And then I take pictures and use them to open up cryingmen.com and make it big!


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## Amandy (Sep 2, 2006)

Yep, event hard core jersey girls don't do their hair that way anymore - nothing new here guys.


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## fred_elliot (Sep 2, 2006)

tres huevos said:


> Ya know, I've been really, really trying to get over Kelligirl. I have about 27 gigs worth of pix of her,



27 gigs? are you sure......


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## Timberwolf (Sep 2, 2006)

Well, I'd doubt that Kelligrl would post on *DE*.myspace.com...
As far as I can remember, she didn't live in germany...
And you're right, FL, that ain't her style.


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## fatlane (Sep 2, 2006)

fred_elliot said:


> 27 gigs? are you sure......



I've got 27.2 GB, so I'm sure Tres will be hitting me up for the 82 pix I have that he doesn't.


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## altered states (Sep 2, 2006)

fatlane said:


> I've got 27.2 GB, so I'm sure Tres will be hitting me up for the 82 pix I have that he doesn't.



YES! YES! Post them here, right now.

And not to nitpick on the Espanol, as mine is lousy, but shouldn't it be Viva la Grasa Feliz? That said, lard is awesome and we should all eat more of it.


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## activistfatgirl (Sep 2, 2006)

tres huevos said:


> YES! YES! Post them here, right now.
> 
> And not to nitpick on the Espanol, as mine is lousy, but shouldn't it be Viva la Grasa Feliz? That said, lard is awesome and we should all eat more of it.



Isn't he more or less saying Long live the happy butter? I think he should change it to "gorda" and I'll always assume he means me.


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## fatlane (Sep 2, 2006)

I like "manteca" because I like lard. It sounds more macho. And I am a macho man.

OK, here are the pixs of Kelligrl:


_Last edited by an irate moderator, who is SICK AND DAMN TIRED OF KELLIGRL PICS on September 2, 2006 at 8:20 PM._


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## fatlane (Sep 2, 2006)

Enough about Kelligrl. Let's talk about ME, now.

http://www.dimensionsmagazine.com/forums/showthread.php?t=11748


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## cactopus (Sep 3, 2006)

fatlane said:


> WARNING: KELLIGRL CONTENT, BUT NOT LIKE YOU MAY BE THINKING
> 
> A little bird shot me a link to http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=98250206 and asked me what I thought of it.
> 
> I went there and looked it over. My reaction, and that of the little bird's, was that this wasn't Kelligrl. Both of us had exchanged emails with her back in the day, and the copy on this site read more like a crazed male youth than the style we remember Kelligrl having. That, and the fact there wasn't even a single new image, not even a face shot. There were inconsistencies in the life story presented here and the one we recalled. This ain't Kelligrl's Myspace, I'm sad to conclude.



It's kind of funny because there is a lady who works in my office building that I talked to the other day who looks just like Kelligirl only minus 80% of the weight above normal. Same 80's hair and same face structure. Was Kelligirl a Jersey inhabitant? I work in Parsippany.


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## fatlane (Sep 3, 2006)

Jersey all the way.

Post pix plz tanx.


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## JMNYC (Sep 3, 2006)

As phony as month-old baloney, and as smelly, too.

Very Norman Bates.


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## GPL (Sep 3, 2006)

It is so easy to recogize it is fake!
Weird that you notice this now, because I knew this months ago already. Also Ned Sonntag posted about this before, but it seemed noone payed attention to that back then. So why ask if this is fake??:doh: 

GPL.


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## Totmacher (Sep 3, 2006)

Ever heard of hope? Sad, pathetic , obsessive, blinding hope?


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## Timberwolf (Sep 3, 2006)

GPL said:


> It is so easy to recogize it is fake!
> Weird that you notice this now, because I knew this months ago already. Also Ned Sonntag posted about this before, but it seemed noone payed attention to that back then. So why ask if this is fake??:doh:
> 
> GPL.


Well, I don't know if you're reading every new post on this board, but I know that I don't. Way too much reading. 
BTW, Ned mentioned it, but there was no link... Actually, he was talking about someone else's MySpace... Quite easy to miss... 
So, please calm down. This is the Weight Board, not Hyde Park... K?


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## GPL (Sep 3, 2006)

Do you guys also have wet dreams about Kelligrl?
What is it that every month someone asks were Kelligrl is?
What is it?? She's gone guys! 
And there so many awesome new BBW's here right now...

GPL.


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## isotope (Sep 3, 2006)

Fakes on myspace!?

You're kidding...

Jesus christ...


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## fatlane (Sep 3, 2006)

GPL said:


> It is so easy to recogize it is fake!
> Weird that you notice this now, because I knew this months ago already. Also Ned Sonntag posted about this before, but it seemed noone payed attention to that back then. So why ask if this is fake??:doh:
> 
> GPL.



Good for you, GPL! 

Good for ol' Ned, too!

I missed that one. I have periods I'm not on the board and the person who mentioned it to me must have missed it, too.

One asks in order to be polite. Obviously, you're not overwhelmingly concerned with that aspect of the issue. But there were people who were taking it seriously and I really didn't want to piss in their cornflakes, so to speak. But you go right ahead. Poop in the corner while you're at it, too, just to underline the point.


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## fatlane (Sep 3, 2006)

Totmacher said:


> Ever heard of hope? Sad, pathetic , obsessive, blinding hope?



Sure have. Where do I sign up?


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## fatlane (Sep 3, 2006)

GPL said:


> Do you guys also have wet dreams about Kelligrl?
> What is it that every month someone asks were Kelligrl is?
> What is it?? She's gone guys!
> And there so many awesome new BBW's here right now...
> ...



Blow it out yer ear, bub. I'm perfectly aware of where the beauties are. HINT: MANY OF THEM ARE SENDING ME THEIR PHOTOGRAPHS. But I also knew Kelligrl beyond just clickin' on her pics. SHE IS THE ELVIS FRIGGIN PRESLEY OF THE PRE-2000 BBWS. If you don't get it, move along, buddy. We're still sobbing and laying wreaths at the equivalent of the Kelligrl Graceland. It's sad, it's pathetic, and there's just no excuse for it, but last I checked, this is still a free country where men can do whatever the hell they please, ESPECIALLY WHITE MEN WHO OWN PROPERTY and all I have to ask you is:

*WHY DO YOU HATE AMERICA, GPL????????////??????>>>?????*


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## fatlane (Sep 3, 2006)

isotope said:


> Fakes on myspace!?
> 
> You're kidding...
> 
> Jesus christ...



No, that one's real. I'm in his extended network.


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## SexxyBBW69 (Sep 4, 2006)

well I am sorry to hear about the fake Kelligirl.. you never know there just may be someone who would come close to her & you can collect all her pics & maybe live very close to you as well


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## fatlane (Sep 4, 2006)

SexxyBBW69 said:


> well I am sorry to hear about the fake Kelligirl.. you never know there just may be someone who would come close to her & you can collect all her pics & maybe live very close to you as well



If you're volunteering, we're ready to mentor you.

STEP ONE: Post pix plz tanx.

STEP TWO: Eat a sammich.

Repeat as necessary. After you post 478 pix, you can start making 10-second videos with really tiny, grainy late-90's webcameras.

Oh yeah, you need a Tripod site for the full effect.


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## SexxyBBW69 (Sep 4, 2006)

fatlane said:


> If you're volunteering, we're ready to mentor you.
> 
> STEP ONE: Post pix plz tanx.
> 
> ...



soon enough u will see soon enough I will be around & there will be plenty of pics of me..... my page is in the works


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## fatlane (Sep 4, 2006)

If there was any way you could get a chick mullet and move to New Jersey, you could knock most of us over with a feather.


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## SexxyBBW69 (Sep 4, 2006)

Im org from bklyn, ny born & raised for 33 yrs so I have the attitude & I can lay a good thick hey how U doin on..... if being from NY isnt good enough well then I guess my looks will have to do


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## fatlane (Sep 4, 2006)

:: checks with the panel of celebrity judges ::

Brooklyn is just fine, they say. How, indeed, U doin?

Now, about the chick mullet... or is that not negotiable, either?


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## SexxyBBW69 (Sep 4, 2006)

fatlane said:


> :: checks with the panel of celebrity judges ::
> 
> Brooklyn is just fine, they say. How, indeed, U doin?
> 
> Now, about the chick mullet... or is that not negotiable, either?



I think my hair is sexy as is.. & I get lots of compliments on it from men so no way sweety


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## fatlane (Sep 4, 2006)

SexxyBBW69 said:


> I think my hair is sexy as is.. & I get lots of compliments on it from men so no way sweety



Confidence, confidence, confidence! I LIKE IT!

All right, we're waiting.


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## activistfatgirl (Sep 4, 2006)

isotope said:


> Fakes on myspace!?
> 
> You're kidding...
> 
> Jesus christ...



I'll take this post to Hyde. Jesus was not a white man. Give me the real Jesus' myspace and maybe I'll friend him.


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## activistfatgirl (Sep 4, 2006)

I'd rock out a chick mullet, but I can't do the tight curly hair. And we've went over this before that no one can have that thin of a face and be so fat. It's unnatural.


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## fatlane (Sep 4, 2006)

Yes, we DID go over this and if I recall correctly, _somebody_ didn't want to duct tape her face to get the Kelligrl effect, thereby RUINING a perfectly good modeling career. I won't mention her name :cough:activistfatgirl:cough:, but she knows who she is.


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## Littleghost (Sep 4, 2006)

fatlane said:


> SHE IS THE ELVIS FRIGGIN PRESLEY OF THE PRE-2000 BBWS. If you don't get it, move along, buddy. We're still sobbing and laying wreaths at the equivalent of the Kelligrl Graceland.


So I guess we should decide on the official costume for professional Kelligrl impersonators to wear. My vote's for the black neglige, since it's a bit revealing, but still covers enough to accomodate the worse impersonators. And of course, the curly black she-mullet wig is mandatory regardless of the outfit. 

Just a big hunka, hunka, hunka, hunka burnin' love. 
--Littleghost


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## fatlane (Sep 4, 2006)

I prefer the jeans and black top combo she had in the spaghetti-ice cream days, her "Hawaii 1968" equivalent.

Absolutely right on the curly black she-mullet. The good news is that it's not an exclusionary hair style, so we can have black Kelligrls, Asian Kelligrls, Hispanic Kelligrls, etc.

What aspects of a performance are critical to channeling the spirit and presence of Kelligrl, to _make us believe we're there again?_ Large sodas, definitely.


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## activistfatgirl (Sep 4, 2006)

What kind of soda (pop)? That might be a deal breaker.


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## fatlane (Sep 4, 2006)

activistfatgirl said:


> What kind of soda (pop)? That might be a deal breaker.



Anything non-diet in a 2-liter bottle, preferably a cola. And chips. The chips went with the soda.


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## activistfatgirl (Sep 4, 2006)

fatlane said:


> Anything non-diet in a 2-liter bottle, preferably a cola. And chips. The chips went with the soda.



I'm out. I"m a fraud. I can't even drink a 12 oz can of sugar soda. No one's gonna go for the feedee that is an almost vegan and drinks sparkling juice and diet soda and has straight hair. *sigh*

(I do however promise to hijack every Keligrl thread you make from here to eternity, fatlane!)


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## fatlane (Sep 4, 2006)

Hold on... maybe there's a niche there... you could be...

VERA, THE VEGA-CORE FEEDEE!

I'll get a layout over to you tomorrow via FedEx and if you approve, we can have the paysite up by October.


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## activistfatgirl (Sep 4, 2006)

fatlane said:


> Hold on... maybe there's a niche there... you could be...
> 
> VERA, THE VEGA-CORE FEEDEE!
> 
> I'll get a layout over to you tomorrow via FedEx and if you approve, we can have the paysite up by October.



Nah, its too much work and I always end up with spinach in my teeth.


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## love dubh (Sep 4, 2006)

activistfatgirl said:


> Nah, its too much work and I always end up with spinach in my teeth.



Compromise! Only do photos shoots. *I'll* eat the vegan goodies, and *she'll* rub her belly and do whatever it is that paysite feedee/faux-feedee models do to get the feederboys' engines revved. Perfect.


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## activistfatgirl (Sep 4, 2006)

maire dubh said:


> Compromise! Only do photos shoots. *I'll* eat the vegan goodies, and *she'll* rub her belly and do whatever it is that paysite feedee/faux-feedee models do to get the feederboys' engines revved. Perfect.



Only if you crimp my hair and help me select outfits.


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## fatlane (Sep 5, 2006)

OK, so do we have a PLAN here? And how much will it cost to overnight the veg to New Jersey?


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## love dubh (Sep 5, 2006)

fatlane said:


> OK, so do we have a PLAN here? And how much will it cost to overnight the veg to New Jersey?



No need. I'll go to Detroit and we'll set up shop in AFG's digs.


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## Jes (Sep 5, 2006)

GPL said:


> Do you guys also have wet dreams about Kelligrl?
> What is it that every month someone asks were Kelligrl is?
> What is it?? She's gone guys!
> And there so many awesome new BBW's here right now...
> ...


they feel about kelligrl the way you do about the big tight hugs. they just can't stop saying it. it's like their brains have been replaced by the words. Big tight hugs kelligrl! big tight hugs kelligrl!


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## fatlane (Sep 5, 2006)

maire dubh said:


> No need. I'll go to Detroit and we'll set up shop in AFG's digs.



Cool. Gimme a shout-out when you're there.


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## activistfatgirl (Sep 5, 2006)

maire dubh said:


> No need. I'll go to Detroit and we'll set up shop in AFG's digs.



SWEEET! Hurry! You may have time left to plant in the garden before winter comes. Start searching on Ebay for a spiral curling iron.

EDIT: Oh, right, I don't have to curl my hair anymore. Nice. Look on ebay for kitten heels and red dresses then.


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## love dubh (Sep 5, 2006)

No, no. You're still impersonating Kelligrl. I'm just eating the food.


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## activistfatgirl (Sep 5, 2006)

maire dubh said:


> No, no. You're still impersonating Kelligrl. I'm just eating the food.


And I pretend to eat the food, right? I'm confused. But I think we should discuss this for another 20 posts because this is a very nice hijack.


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## fatlane (Sep 5, 2006)

You only THINK it's a hijack.


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