# Emotional Eating



## toni (Sep 26, 2012)

My whole life I have been living in denial. I see it. I am an emotional eater. I didn't recognize the signs until now. The last few months have been an eye opener for me. I was removed from a high stress situation and lost 35 pounds (without trying). I will be returning to that stressful environment very soon and I find myself eating around the clock. It is almost 4 am and I just polished off 2 bologna sandwiches (I don't even like bologna that much!) on potato bread with a ton of mayo. Don't forget the chips and cookies on the side. I haven't eaten in the middle of the night for months. I am putting two and two together and it is making sense to me now. The stress is building and my brain is responding. I wouldn't mind the binge eating or weight gain if I was enjoying my food. Open up a new pizza/cupcake shop next to me and I stack on 100 pounds? Awesome! I had a great time doing it. Emotional eating makes you eat everything and anything like a rabid animal. That isn't really fun. 

I need help but not sure what kind. I see a psychiatrist but he won't offer any sympathy or advice. He will tell me to stop eating lol. I am on two antidepressants and have a couple of pills to manage stress if needed. They don't seem to be working when it comes this type of thing.

Can anyone one share their experiences or advice?


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## Tad (Sep 26, 2012)

I don’t react as strongly as you apparently do, but yes, absolutely I’m a stress eater. With me it is a mix of the calming effect of digestion, the distraction of eating, and--given that at least some parts of me are a gainer/feedee -- less ability to resist those temptations when I have other things draining my mental resources.

I’ve never really found a solution, the best I can do is moderate it. The first step is one that you’ve made—recognize when it is happening. First instinct is to then say &#8216;well, if you know it is stress eating, don’t do it!’ but I never found it that simple. 

Tactically, when I’m ravenous and going to stress eat, if I recognize it I can sometimes moderate it. Like having a small bowl of cereal instead of demolishing a bag of chip, or if I’m stopping at a donut shop or something like that, only taking a few dollars in with me so that I can only buy so much.

Strategically, I’ve tried to recognize when I’m most apt to stress eat, and figured out what things best give me enough of what I need in smaller quantities. So I realized at one job that buy mid-afternoon I’d be mad with hunger and was going to buy chocolate bars. So I started stocking my desk drawer with big bars of good quality dark chocolate, and would have one (or on really bad days 2) rows of that. The flavour is really satisfying, chocolate is a natural when you are stressed, and having good chocolate seemed to satisfy some of the &#8216;I need to treat myself’ side of the stress eating. It isn’t a perfect guarantee that I don’t buy something else in the afternoon, but most days it is enough. And I’ve learned that in the evening often it seems like there is not enough food in the world to satisfy those cravings, but that for some reason—for me—a small bowl of cereal seems to give me a better chance of stopping than do most other things (so long as it isn’t too sweet…for whatever reason more sugar just seems to make me more apt to keep going)

Sorry I can’t offer anything better than a few coping tricks 

ETA: when I recognize that stress has ramped up my hunger I do try to also force myself to also ramp up my amount of physical activity, both as stress relief and to help mitigate the effects of the eating.


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## Surlysomething (Sep 26, 2012)

Hi Toni,

Thanks for sharing this. Emotional eating is such a HUGE deal these days and it's pretty evident with the humongous rise in weight gain and diabetes in North American society. I too am an emotional eater and it affects almost everything in my life. When I feel good it's totally evident that I have my eating under control, when i'm stressed my eating is a train wreck. Last night I was hoovering crap into my mouth faster than you could say indigestion because my feelings had been hurt. A couple hours later and I can look back and go, holy shit. What the hell happened?

I've seen a therapist before and talked about this very thing quite a bit. The only thing I got from it was the use of meditation. If I recognize the signs of a binge coming on and actually slow down and meditate I can work through it. It might be worth looking into.

That and trying to keep trigger foods out of the house (chips, cookies, candy, ice cream). I ran out of snack food last night and it was too late to go out and get more. I dodged a bullet.


Tina






toni said:


> My whole life I have been living in denial. I see it. I am an emotional eater. I didn't recognize the signs until now. The last few months have been an eye opener for me. I was removed from a high stress situation and lost 35 pounds (without trying). I will be returning to that stressful environment very soon and I find myself eating around the clock. It is almost 4 am and I just polished off 2 bologna sandwiches (I don't even like bologna that much!) on potato bread with a ton of mayo. Don't forget the chips and cookies on the side. I haven't eaten in the middle of the night for months. I am putting two and two together and it is making sense to me now. The stress is building and my brain is responding. I wouldn't mind the binge eating or weight gain if I was enjoying my food. Open up a new pizza/cupcake shop next to me and I stack on 100 pounds? Awesome! I had a great time doing it. Emotional eating makes you eat everything and anything like a rabid animal. That isn't really fun.
> 
> I need help but not sure what kind. I see a psychiatrist but he won't offer any sympathy or advice. He will tell me to stop eating lol. I am on two antidepressants and have a couple of pills to manage stress if needed. They don't seem to be working when it comes this type of thing.
> 
> Can anyone one share their experiences or advice?


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## CastingPearls (Sep 26, 2012)

Toni, try reading Geneen Roth's Women, Food, and God. 

It's not about God, as I know it sounds religious as much as there's a connection to spirituality even if it's you yourself that you revere, so please don't let that put you off.

There are many women (and some men) here for whom this book make a profound impact on their lives. If you do nothing else, buy a used copy from Amazon.com and read it. You won't regret it and it will give you some insight into why you do what you do, why we ALL do what we do. 

I've lost 400 lbs. in five years. It's not a diet book but it helped me face things in my life and I've never looked back. Good luck and know that at any size or in any shape, you're liked and loved exactly as you are.


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## moore2me (Sep 27, 2012)

I am ashamed in that I can give you no good advice after my near lethal binge a couple of weeks ago. (I blamed it on our tragic football game, but I was weak and my cabinets were well stocked in advance.)


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## toni (Sep 29, 2012)

Thank you, everyone. Stress is a tough thing to process. I went from eating all day and night to eating nothing now. That isn't healthy either. It is causing headaches and shakes. I just can't bring myself to stomach anything. I need to get the eating and stress issues under control. 

CP, thanks for the recommendation. I will look up the book now.


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## KittyKitten (Sep 29, 2012)

I set aside one or two days to binge eat. I eat anything i want in as much quantities that I can hold but for only one or two days a week. Then go back on track the rest of the week. I feel like this helps me get all the emotional eating out. I'm easily stressed at this time of my life leading to moodiness and this helps me. I exercise regularly as well as to maintain my weight.


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## Gingembre (Oct 4, 2012)

Toni,

I understand, I'm completely the same. Over the couple of years I lived in a cycle of binging or fasting, completely ruled by my emotions (something which was proved when I went to Ghana for 4 months during that time and ate like a "normal" person the whole time). Seeing a counsellor who specialised in eating disorders really helped me. She didn't cure me, but I exploring the reasons why I emotionally eat, and what can trigger a binge, means I feel more equipped to nip those feelings in the bud, or at least contain them somewhat.

I'm at the very beginning of my journey, I still get the urge to eat uncontrollably, and sometimes I still do, but not having trigger foods in the house helps, as does writing down things that are bothering me, things I want to eat, whatever. I'm also trying to make myself take a bath or paint my nails or do something else to distract myself for a while until stonger urges pass. Now I make myself cook "real" food and aim to eat 3 healthy meals per day, with a couple of snacks. If I want chocolate or cake then I buy it, but only in small quantities...I have stopped trying to kid myself that I can eat a small portion and leave the rest in the cupboard; I can't. I don't buy bread either, for the same reason. For the last month I feel like I am eating more every day than I have for ages, but I am losing weight (slowly, but I am). Eating at regular times is also making me much more emotionally stable and I feel for the most part like I have more energy.

I have to say though, that a lot of the reason I have felt able to make these changes and stick to them is changing my situation to one that is less stressful in terms of homelife, and much more stimulating in terms of work. Is there anything you can do to change/alter/minimise the effect of your high stress environment?

Good luck


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## toni (Oct 9, 2012)

Excellent advice, Gingembre. I am in the process of making that happen right now. I have also made it my policy not to allow negativity into my life. It is a joy sucker. When people bring their drama around me I feel like my head will explode. If you aren't bringing me solutions, I don't want to hear it. 

You are either on my side, by my side or in my fucking way. I know it is a cliche but echoes so true in my life right now

It was a rough week. Stress and pressure are huge problems  I ate everything and anything. This week will be better. I will try to breath more, count to ten. Ugggggh.


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## largenlovely (Oct 17, 2012)

I was dealing with depression as well but when I got on my anti-depressant, it helped with my binge eating. It might be an extreme answer to the problem though if you don't suffer with enough depression to warrant meds though.

Of course, some situations will still cause me to binge eat regardless. I guess there's no miracle pill for it all lol


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## toni (Oct 17, 2012)

I am currently on three!!!!! LOL

Trazodone, Effexor ER and Wellbutrin

I also take minipress to handle nightmares (I suffer PTSD), klonopiin to calm down if needed and Ambien when I can't sleep. 

I am a walking CVS. I still binge eat. 

I just can't manage my stress properly. I am not built to cope. :shocked:

When I started on the meds I saw a decrease in the binge eating but that has gone away. Maybe my doc needs to up them?


***disclaimer*** I didn't start out on so many meds. I had a nervous breakdown a few months back and my doctor is trying to get me to normal again (good luck!). It is scary being so weak.


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## CastingPearls (Oct 17, 2012)

Toni, although some have a side-effect of weight-loss, many anti-depressants actually cause weight gain or make weight-loss much harder. Perhaps you should have a convo with your doctor about this too.


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## toni (Oct 17, 2012)

CastingPearls said:


> Toni, although some have a side-effect of weight-loss, many anti-depressants actually cause weight gain or make weight-loss much harder. Perhaps you should have a convo with your doctor about this too.



He has me on Topamax to help ward off weight gain. Topamax is generally prescribed for seizures but it's off label use is weight loss. He was worried all the scripts would cause me to gain and become more depressed.


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## 1love_emily (Jul 28, 2013)

I'm curious about this for myself:

As someone who is fat, as anyone been diagnosed with a EDNOS? Like BED?

(EDNOS: Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified, BED: Binge Eating Disorder).

I'm an emotional eater as well, which is why I gain weight like crazy in the school year. But the more and more research I've done, the more I realize that my "symptoms" sound lot more like BED. 

(Eating unusually large amounts of food
Eating even when you're full or not hungry
Eating rapidly during binge episodes
Eating until you're uncomfortably full
Frequently eating alone
Feeling that your eating behavior is out of control
Feeling depressed, disgusted, ashamed, guilty or upset about your eating
Experiencing depression and anxiety
Feeling isolated and having difficulty talking about your feelings
Frequently dieting, possibly without weight loss
Losing and gaining weight repeatedly, also called yo-yo dieting 
- Thank you MAYO Clinic)


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## Gingembre (Jul 28, 2013)

I was informally diagnosed with BED a few years ago by a counsellor I was seeing at the time. I don't really suffer from it anymore, but emotional eating is still a big issue I face. I haven't binged for a long time, which is not to say that I don't sometimes still eat large quantities of food at once, but there's a definite distinction between the two.


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## largenlovely (Jul 28, 2013)

Gingembre said:


> I haven't binged for a long time, which is not to say that I don't sometimes still eat large quantities of food at once, but there's a definite distinction between the two.



There's definitely a difference between the two. I was trying to explain that to my therapist a couple months ago. Though I'm sure she probably already knew what I was talking about. I eat a lot because it takes a lot of food to maintain a larger size but the emotional eating isn't always combined with it. It has been a minute since I've done any emotional binge eating either but it's always lurking in the background.


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## BigBeautifulMe (Jul 28, 2013)

For anyone who wants to seek professional help for food issues, a highly recommend an eating disorder therapist. I suffered from Binge Eating Disorder for years. Fortunately I've worked through it, but i had to bring in a therapist when i wanted to lose weight because that's what triggers my BED (sigh). She's been great, though.


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