# GYN visit



## jewels_mystery (Nov 18, 2009)

I had a couple of weird things happen at my gyn appointment today. 1st. they could not take my blood pressure because they did not have a cuff that would fit my arm. There was only the original cuff. Normally my other doctors have 2-3 cuffs. 2nd, the doctor had the nurse come in to help her "open me up" so she could insert the dreaded speculum. I am a ssbbw and never had a dr need someone assistance before. I wanted to know if anyone else had this experience? I am more stunned than insulted. Both were really nice about it.


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## Sugar (Nov 18, 2009)

Jewels I've not ran into anyone needing help to get the speculum in...I used to be close to 450 and even now I have a considerable amount of skin. When I was bigger there was trouble keeping it in for any length of time, but no issues getting it in.

As for the cuff...I normally have to tell a new nurse that I need the big cuff due to my excess skin/fat on my upper arms. For some reason they assume tiny hands means tiny biceps? I can't imagine a dr's office that isn't equipped with 1 of the large cuff.


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## jewels_mystery (Nov 18, 2009)

I was pretty shocked about the cuff. Especially since it was a Planned parenthood office.


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## Sugar (Nov 18, 2009)

Oh...well not that my answer is different but I've been to a PP and was told I'm too fat for an exam. I've never been treated well in a PP office.


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## jewels_mystery (Nov 18, 2009)

Sugar said:


> Oh...well not that my answer is different but I've been to a PP and was told I'm too fat for an exam. I've never been treated well in a PP office.



Are you serious????? Please tell me you reported them. I've been to a couple and up until this, had great experiences. Well as great as it can be considering I am paying a total stranger to feel me up.


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## olwen (Nov 21, 2009)

Wow, how rude. I've never had a gyn ask for assistance using the speculum. It might slip out a little, but the gyn can push it back in and it's fine. I guess if they weren't mean about it then that's something...

I have had doctors and nurses not only not have a larger cuff, but not know how to use the smaller cuff either. If they don't have a larger cuff they can use the smaller cuff on your forearm and place the stethescope on your wrist, tho some nurses/doctors will say the reading won't be accurate that way, that's not necessarily true. I have insisted nurses use the smaller cuff on my forearm to take the reading if they don't have a larger cuff and it comes out fine.


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## jewels_mystery (Nov 22, 2009)

Yeah I thought it was rude also. But I hate gyn visits and tried to focus on getting it over with. That said, I will not be going back to that place. I was shocked to hear several bbws also comment that its rare for drs to have a larger cuff when they went. That never happend before. One even suggested buying my own cuff to take to visits with me.


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## littlefairywren (Nov 22, 2009)

jewels mystery, I hope you don't mind my asking a question here about my own experience at my last gyn exam. I am not sure if what happened to me is normal considering my size.

I saw a male gyn and he was extrememly rough during my exam. No probs with the speculum, but when he was doing the last part of the exam with his hands and was feeling my ovaries for cysts, it felt like he had most of his hand where the sun does not shine. It was extremely painful and left me bruised. When I did complain that he was hurting me, he said "if you are this fat, you should expect it". 

Aside from him being a complete tool, is it normal to be in such pain during the exam, let alone after? I was still sore the following day.


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## jewels_mystery (Nov 22, 2009)

No I don't mind. I think its great that we can discuss this subject. The only time I was in pain afterwards was due to the speculum. That was only once so far. Please file a complaint in writing. His comments and behaviors was so uncalled for. Please tell me you are not going to return to him for treatment!!


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## jewels_mystery (Nov 22, 2009)

On a side note, I think I had one male gyn doctor when I was in my late teens. He was so rough, I decided then to only have female doctors.


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## littlefairywren (Nov 22, 2009)

jewels_mystery said:


> No I don't mind. I think its great that we can discuss this subject. The only time I was in pain afterwards was due to the speculum. That was only once so far. Please file a complaint in writing. His comments and behaviors was so uncalled for. Please tell me you are not going to return to him for treatment!!





jewels_mystery said:


> On a side note, I think I had one male gyn doctor when I was in my late teens. He was so rough, I decided then to only have female doctors.



Thank you. I did file a complaint in writing, though I doubt I will find out the result. I no longer live in that area, so will definitly not be returning to him.

I did have one bad experience with a speculum, when it was discovered I was tipped the wrong way. That did hurt.

I am on the look out for a female gyn after the whole experience, no more males after that!


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## olwen (Nov 22, 2009)

littlefairywren said:


> jewels mystery, I hope you don't mind my asking a question here about my own experience at my last gyn exam. I am not sure if what happened to me is normal considering my size.
> 
> I saw a male gyn and he was extrememly rough during my exam. No probs with the speculum, but when he was doing the last part of the exam with his hands and was feeling my ovaries for cysts, it felt like he had most of his hand where the sun does not shine. It was extremely painful and left me bruised. When I did complain that he was hurting me, he said "if you are this fat, you should expect it".
> 
> Aside from him being a complete tool, is it normal to be in such pain during the exam, let alone after? I was still sore the following day.



I don't think it's normal for you to be bruised from an exam. If a doc pushes on a spot and it hurts that could be an indication of trouble, but being rough and bruising, no way jose. I've had a similar experience from a male gyn, only it was during the breast exam. He was rough and said mean things that I won't repeat. After that I vowed to never go to a male gyn ever again and I haven't. I've had female gyns say mean things but they were never rough, you know. That is totally unacceptable. There are doctor rating sites out there. Might be worth it to give them bad reviews on those sites. Good luck finding a new better gyn.


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## olwen (Nov 22, 2009)

jewels_mystery said:


> Yeah I thought it was rude also. But I hate gyn visits and tried to focus on getting it over with. That said, I will not be going back to that place. I was shocked to hear several bbws also comment that its rare for drs to have a larger cuff when they went. That never happend before. One even suggested buying my own cuff to take to visits with me.



Large cuffs and large gowns and sturdy tables, with long enough stirrups are often absent. I often forget to bring my own gown or robe. :doh: For my last two doctor visits I just sat there naked, but both docs were good about making sure no one was outside the door when they entered and exited the room. Maybe next time I'll remember to bring a robe.


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## littlefairywren (Nov 22, 2009)

olwen said:


> I don't think it's normal for you to be bruised from an exam. If a doc pushes on a spot and it hurts that could be an indication of trouble, but being rough and bruising, no way jose. I've had a similar experience from a male gyn, only it was during the breast exam. He was rough and said mean things that I won't repeat. After that I vowed to never go to a male gyn ever again and I haven't. I've had female gyns say mean things but they were never rough, you know. That is totally unacceptable. There are doctor rating sites out there. Might be worth it to give them bad reviews on those sites. Good luck finding a new better gyn.



Thanks olwen. I got the impression during the exam, that he got a kick out of humiliating me. If I did not know any better, that he was punishing me for walking into his room "fat". I will check out if there are any rating sites available here in Australia.


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## jamie (Nov 22, 2009)

While I am an IT girl, I work in a medical environment and understand the logistics of a medical office. I understand that certain procedures and a certain professional, "matter-of-fact" demeanor when it comes to some exams is necessary. All that being said, I had the most excruciatingly humiliating experience at my last two gynecological exams, that I am not sure I will ever get checked out again. 

This was not a case of a single bad doctor, I had such a bad experience with the first doctor that I waited 9 years to be seen again and now have waited 2 or 3 for the next visit. With both visits, one male doctor - one female doctor, I felt so disgusting to them that I felt sorry for them having to touch me. Ugh. The last visit, I just laid there and cried. I am very shy - that is probably an understatement - and the idea of getting naked and lying there in a vulnerable position was admittedly difficult for me, but her commentary and dismissive attitude while examining me did not help. I was 330 when I went for my exam and they didn't have a larger cuff or a gown that fit. I have been in lots of offices and have had both of these items available, we have them in our clinics, I think it is unconscionable not to have them in such an intimate setting. 

I haven't talked about this with many people, so I am surprised that I am sharing it now, but I have wondered if it was me, or a symptom of the women's healthcare system.


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## tinkerbell (Nov 22, 2009)

I'm sorry to hear all the bad experiences.

I have a male GYN and I love him. 

I almost tipped over the stupid table at one of my many visits a few years ago. I went to sit up, and sat on that part that they pull out - you're not supposed to sit on it. I was so embarrassed. :blush: I mean, I almost tip over the table, I'm naked and almost fall. He just helped steady me asked if I was ok, and didn't say a word about it - thank god. I think I would have died had he. The following time, I had to put my legs over my head, because my cervix was hiding and no mater how I moved, or he moved the stir ups and speculum it wouldn't show. And the first time I met him, I ended up hysterical, because of the colposcopy I had to have done - it brought back some bad memories. 

I dont know how to phrase this the right way. So I'm sorry if this comes out wrong! I know sometimes how I'm laying on the table, and how the stir ups are, its hard to get your legs open wide enough for them to 'get in there'. And it was harder when I was at my heaviest - because of the size of my legs/fat rolls. So maybe it had to do with the size of your legs and the position you were in, and the style of table?? And at least they were nice about it!!

That sucks about the BP cuff. I thought it was standard for offices to have different sizes.


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## jewels_mystery (Nov 22, 2009)

jamie said:


> While I am an IT girl, I work in a medical environment and understand the logistics of a medical office. I understand that certain procedures and a certain professional, "matter-of-fact" demeanor when it comes to some exams is necessary. All that being said, I had the most excruciatingly humiliating experience at my last two gynecological exams, that I am not sure I will ever get checked out again.
> 
> This was not a case of a single bad doctor, I had such a bad experience with the first doctor that I waited 9 years to be seen again and now have waited 2 or 3 for the next visit. With both visits, one male doctor - one female doctor, I felt so disgusting to them that I felt sorry for them having to touch me. Ugh. The last visit, I just laid there and cried. I am very shy - that is probably an understatement - and the idea of getting naked and lying there in a vulnerable position was admittedly difficult for me, but her commentary and dismissive attitude while examining me did not help. I was 330 when I went for my exam and they didn't have a larger cuff or a gown that fit. I have been in lots of offices and have had both of these items available, we have them in our clinics, I think it is unconscionable not to have them in such an intimate setting.
> 
> I haven't talked about this with many people, so I am surprised that I am sharing it now, but I have wondered if it was me, or a symptom of the women's healthcare system.



I am glad you are discussing your experiences. Stuff like this is important and need to be discussed. Do not feel sorry for the doctors. That is their job!! I used to be like you, shy and felt like I should apologize for my weight. No more. If we do not become a little militant about our health issues, we will be the only ones suffering in the end. We are the same size. So I know exactly how you feel. My sister gave me great advice a couple of years ago. I would go 4-6 years between visits and she would get on my back for not going yearly. She told me to look at it that its only 2 minutes of embarrassment. That is nothing. So as soon as I am in the stirrups, I just keep replaying only 2 minutes in my head.


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## BigBeautifulMe (Nov 22, 2009)

I had a really bad experience at a PP, too.  I will never, ever go to one of those again.


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## littlefairywren (Nov 22, 2009)

I am curious, do all gyn exams in the US have the use of stirrups? I have never been to a doctors office here in Aus that has them. You end up on a narrow table that is always pressed up against a wall. So I end up with a thigh and hip pushing me over, because of said wall. Any wonder my exams are so uncomfortable.

Until I read your post *tinkerbell* I did not connect the dots about "access". Thank you.

And thank you jewels_mystery for this thread. So much!


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## jewels_mystery (Nov 22, 2009)

I believe stirrups are standard here. I can not imagine conducting a exam without them. Especially since I am all belly.


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## olwen (Nov 22, 2009)

jamie said:


> While I am an IT girl, I work in a medical environment and understand the logistics of a medical office. I understand that certain procedures and a certain professional, "matter-of-fact" demeanor when it comes to some exams is necessary. All that being said, I had the most excruciatingly humiliating experience at my last two gynecological exams, that I am not sure I will ever get checked out again.
> 
> This was not a case of a single bad doctor, I had such a bad experience with the first doctor that I waited 9 years to be seen again and now have waited 2 or 3 for the next visit. With both visits, one male doctor - one female doctor, I felt so disgusting to them that I felt sorry for them having to touch me. Ugh. The last visit, I just laid there and cried. I am very shy - that is probably an understatement - and the idea of getting naked and lying there in a vulnerable position was admittedly difficult for me, but her commentary and dismissive attitude while examining me did not help. I was 330 when I went for my exam and they didn't have a larger cuff or a gown that fit. I have been in lots of offices and have had both of these items available, we have them in our clinics, I think it is unconscionable not to have them in such an intimate setting.
> 
> I haven't talked about this with many people, so I am surprised that I am sharing it now, but I have wondered if it was me, or a symptom of the women's healthcare system.



It's def not you. I haven't been to a gyn in two years myself since I'm leary about finding a good gyn. The last one was just mean. I know it's bad tho to wait so I'm gonna have to buckle down and start searching while I still have health insurance. 



littlefairywren said:


> I am curious, do all gyn exams in the US have the use of stirrups? I have never been to a doctors office here in Aus that has them. You end up on a narrow table that is always pressed up against a wall. So I end up with a thigh and hip pushing me over, because of said wall. Any wonder my exams are so uncomfortable.
> 
> Until I read your post *tinkerbell* I did not connect the dots about "access". Thank you.
> 
> And thank you jewels_mystery for this thread. So much!



If the tables are bolted to the walls, maybe you could try moving the table over a few inches so you will be more comfortable. You know there is always those few minutes when you are left alone in the exam room while you wait for the gyn...that's when you could move the table over. You could also ask the nurse to help you move it over if it's too heavy. Kind of embarassing, but worth it so you will be more comfortable.


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## littlefairywren (Nov 22, 2009)

olwen said:


> It's def not you. I haven't been to a gyn in two years myself since I'm leary about finding a good gyn. The last one was just mean. I know it's bad tho to wait so I'm gonna have to buckle down and start searching while I still have health insurance.
> 
> 
> 
> If the tables are bolted to the walls, maybe you could try moving the table over a few inches so you will be more comfortable. You know there is always those few minutes when you are left alone in the exam room while you wait for the gyn...that's when you could move the table over. You could also ask the nurse to help you move it over if it's too heavy. Kind of embarassing, but worth it so you will be more comfortable.



I wish it were that easy olwen. I have never had a nurse present, nor has there ever been a small room where the exam takes place. All in the doctors office, and he waits in the same room where you disrobe all behind a bitty curtain.

I will however, check to see if I can't move the table next time. Blow the embarrassment, it is hard enough balancing on the table let alone those excrutiating moments staring at the ceiling.

Thanks for the advice.


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## olwen (Nov 22, 2009)

littlefairywren said:


> I wish it were that easy olwen. I have never had a nurse present, nor has there ever been a small room where the exam takes place. All in the doctors office, and he waits in the same room where you disrobe all behind a bitty curtain.
> 
> I will however, check to see if I can't move the table next time. Blow the embarrassment, it is hard enough balancing on the table let alone those excrutiating moments staring at the ceiling.
> 
> Thanks for the advice.



Oh, that is different. Here the nurse escorts you into the room, takes your vitals, then she leaves you along while you change, then the doctor comes in later to examine you. I don't know that I would feel comfortable disrobing while the doctor was in the room even if he/she was behind a curtain....


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## jewels_mystery (Nov 23, 2009)

littlefairywren said:


> I wish it were that easy olwen. I have never had a nurse present, nor has there ever been a small room where the exam takes place. All in the doctors office, and he waits in the same room where you disrobe all behind a bitty curtain.
> 
> I will however, check to see if I can't move the table next time. Blow the embarrassment, it is hard enough balancing on the table let alone those excrutiating moments staring at the ceiling.
> 
> Thanks for the advice.



I can understand why you find the whole experience overwhelming. It would be nice if there were some dims ladies in your area who can comment on their experiences. That way you could find a decent doctor.


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