# Feeders: Difference Between Fantasy and Reality?



## largenlovely (Jun 28, 2008)

There have been a lot of subthreads from the "fantasy to concern" thread. I figured i'd make yet another one lol. I feel that most feeders may fantasize about immobility and the extremes of feederism, but the reality of what they would expect from a mate/girlfriend/wife/boyfriend whatever...is not the same thing. So...i've created a poll and hope that y'all will voice your opinions on the matter  

Would you expect your significant other to be on board with all of your feederism fantasies, including the extreme ones if you have them?


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## Ted Michael Morgan (Jun 28, 2008)

I would love to put 25 pounds on a lover. I don't think that one has to go full tilt on these things. Twenty-five to fifty pounds added to a lover would be great and then if she wants to go on--that would be fine too! Linda would have been absolutely beautiful about fifty pounds heavier in our marriage and she was exactly that much heavier a year after she left. She looked fantastic! 

 

View attachment 8585.jpg


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## natasfan (Jun 28, 2008)

i would like to feed you
you must eat a lot, and i m a good feeder.lol

:eat1::eat1:


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## largenlovely (Jun 28, 2008)

the question isn't really about what you would "love" though...it's would you *expect* your partner to do it in real life. 



Ted Michael Morgan said:


> I would love to put 25 pounds on a lover.


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## natasfan (Jun 28, 2008)

natasfan said:


> i would like to feed you
> you must eat a lot, and i m a good feeder.lol
> 
> :eat1::eat1:



i didnt answer your question

now i ll do it:
Yes, I would like to find a partner who will live out these fantasies in real life 
do you like to bee feeded by your partner? do your friends ask you to feed you?
i would like to see you overeating.


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## largenlovely (Jun 28, 2008)

I think you are probably new to these forums? I think i'll send you an "instruction manual" for the boards in a private email lol



natasfan said:


> i didnt answer your question
> 
> now i ll do it:
> Yes, I would like to find a partner who will live out these fantasies in real life
> ...


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## Still a Skye fan (Jun 28, 2008)

To answer your question, Melissa, no, I wouldn't expect my significant other to be on board for my feederism fantasies.

While this topic can make for appealing WG stories in the hands of a good writer, I'd never expect it from a partner in real life.

I just want to enjoy being with anyone who wishes to be with me. 


Dennis


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## Totmacher (Jun 28, 2008)

I expect it the same way I expect to be the sole winner of the biggest lottery jackpot to date.


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## largenlovely (Jun 28, 2008)

hmm it's interesting to see how this poll is going. I might actually be surprised by the results lol


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## Buckeye Born (Jun 28, 2008)

As much as I fantasize about weight gain, neither my wife or myself are healthy enough for it in real life. I would never ask her to gain weight for me knowing the consequences of that gain.


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## ripley (Jun 28, 2008)

I have a problem with the wording of your poll.    

I think the use of "*all* of your fantasies" might skew your results.


:kiss2:


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## Wagimawr (Jun 29, 2008)

We have a winner 

See how easy it is, folks?

All of my feederism fantasies? Most definitely not because I'm still figuring out some of them, and I have a suspicion "oh, just grow for me, sweetie, I'll tell ya when to stop" just won't cut it.


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## Haunted (Jun 29, 2008)

My girl and i do talk about feeding we fantasize together about feeding, and we play in actual feeding fantasy but, no i do not expect her to fullfill my fantasies especially the extreme ones, but we have alot fun playing with them :eat2:


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## KHayes666 (Jun 29, 2008)

Hell I don't expect my g/f to make breakfast in the morning let alone put on 25 lbs or whatever lol

I'd like to see a fantasy or two fufilled but I don't expect it nor is it nessiscary in a relationship.


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## HDANGEL15 (Jun 29, 2008)

Haunted said:


> My girl and i do talk about feeding we fantasize together about feeding, and we play in actual feeding fantasy but, no i do not expect her to fullfill my fantasies especially the extreme ones, but we have alot fun playing with them :eat2:


*
the talk and fantasy is most of the fun to me...but then I
am not looking for SSBHM..although I have dated one recently *


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## GordoNegro (Jun 29, 2008)

This was a great thread, as it is really an eye-opener to see where people are really coming from. IMO, I think there is a line and if not crossed allows you as Feeder/Feedee to keep it as fantasy, limiting the real-time experiences as you best see fit, not greatly impacting your day to day activities.
Though from changing from Strictly feeder to Mutual gainer, IMO the line had been crossed to where deep down I could not see otherwise.
Taking promotions to where weight is less of a factor (as opposed to worrying about job security with some professions like Law Enforcement etc.)
and able to afford the style of clothing I want as opposed to jogging pants and t-shirts (which is cool 4 some but just not 4 me).

It's just good to see where everyone is coming from.


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## largenlovely (Jun 29, 2008)

you hush up lol

actually last night (or this morning rather lol) as i was drifting off to sleep i was thinking that maybe i should've worded the last option different. I think i should've made it "Yes, i EXPECT my partner to live out all my fantasies in real life"..... but too late now lol



ripley said:


> I have a problem with the wording of your poll.
> 
> I think the use of "*all* of your fantasies" might skew your results.
> 
> ...


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## largenlovely (Jun 29, 2008)

it's really funny that you should mention that Dennis...it actually inspired me to write one yesterday afternoon that will I'll be mentioning on the paysite board this week lol



Still a Skye fan said:


> While this topic can make for appealing WG stories in the hands of a good writer, I'd never expect it from a partner in real life.


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## largenlovely (Jun 29, 2008)

to me that's what it's all about ....incorporating ways to play with each other and live out your fantasies for a time, in an intimate moment, that neither parties would feel are "threatening"...yes, i use that in quotations because i don't like the word, but i know that there are a lot of people who feel that the feederism fantasies are threatening.



Haunted said:


> My girl and i do talk about feeding we fantasize together about feeding, and we play in actual feeding fantasy but, no i do not expect her to fullfill my fantasies especially the extreme ones, but we have alot fun playing with them :eat2:


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## Haunted (Jun 29, 2008)

largenlovely said:


> to me that's what it's all about ....incorporating ways to play with each other and live out your fantasies for a time, in an intimate moment, that neither parties would feel are "threatening"...yes, i use that in quotations because i don't like the word, but i know that there are a lot of people who feel that the feederism fantasies are threatening.



I hate Rep Limitations If i want to give all the rep i have to mellissa then Why Can't I, damn the fairness Police !!!!!!


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## largenlovely (Jun 29, 2008)

lol  

I think it's awesome that your girlfriend has them as well  a lot of women may be more afraid than men to open up about these fantasies...but fantasies are just that for a lot of people...fantasies. I know there are some that i have i wouldn't want to actually experience in reality....but play time is FUN lol 



Haunted said:


> I hate Rep Limitations If i want to give all the rep i have to mellissa then Why Can't I, damn the fairness Police !!!!!!


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## Chimpi (Jun 29, 2008)

KHayes666 said:


> Hell I don't expect my g/f to make breakfast in the morning let alone put on 25 lbs or whatever lol



I would not expect a significant other of mine to fulfill any of my fantasies, just as Hayes here puts it quite well. I, too, would _like_ some/all of my fantasies fulfilled in either a fantasy- or reality-based way, but I would never expect it of a significant other.

The only expectations I would have going into a relationship would be:

She's fat
She's honest


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## Haunted (Jun 29, 2008)

Chimpi said:


> I would not expect a significant other of mine to fulfill any of my fantasies, just as Hayes here puts it quite well. I, too, would _like_ some/all of my fantasies fulfilled in either a fantasy- or reality-based way, but I would never expect it of a significant other.
> 
> The only expectations I would have going into a relationship would be:
> 
> ...



again with the rep Limits Here you are chimpi a couple counterfeit Reps don't spend em all in one place I loved you r requirements


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## KHayes666 (Jun 29, 2008)

Chimpi said:


> I would not expect a significant other of mine to fulfill any of my fantasies, just as Hayes here puts it quite well. I, too, would _like_ some/all of my fantasies fulfilled in either a fantasy- or reality-based way, but I would never expect it of a significant other.
> 
> The only expectations I would have going into a relationship would be:
> 
> ...



I wouldn't say she had to be fat in order to have a relationship, but honesty I will agree with is something I want out of one.

All my friends know I'm into big girls, but not very many know I'm an encourager. If someone I date finds out, they have to be honest about how they feel about it.


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## ripley (Jun 30, 2008)

KHayes666 said:


> but not very many know I'm an encourager. If someone I date finds out, they have to be honest about how they feel about it.



Doesn't pay to be honest about how you feel around here, actually.


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## Chimpi (Jun 30, 2008)

ripley said:


> Doesn't pay to be honest about how you feel around here, actually.



Since your Private Messaging and E-mail is turned off, I want you to know that _I_ appreciate your honesty. You're a wonderful person, and I am glad that I have the privilege of getting to know you.


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## ripley (Jun 30, 2008)

You've been nothing but a sweet, kind, gentleman to me, Justin. (((((You)))))


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## KHayes666 (Jun 30, 2008)

ripley said:


> Doesn't pay to be honest about how you feel around here, actually.



I have nothing to hide, people either will either accept me or scoff at me, but I am who I am and I'm gonna enjoy myself on here regardless.


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## Ted Michael Morgan (Jun 30, 2008)

Totmacher said:


> I expect it the same way I expect to be the sole winner of the biggest lottery jackpot to date.


Yes, I feel the same way.


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## TONYS (Jun 30, 2008)

My wife is a feedee, she has fantasies which we share. Our sexual relationship is really wonderfull because we share the same fantasies. This creates a fantasic sexual life. If she was not a feedee and was more a foodee the dynamic of our fantasies would not be able to play out. I am in love with her too so it creates a way different environment than say a lot of feeder relationships. I would never force her or punish her, as it seems some feeders have a tendancy of doing, but I want her to be happy which she is. 

She has gianed and wants to gain, not because of me, but because of her orientation, the gains make her happy. She is fulfilling something she has always wanted. 

Immobility, well it is a fantasy, for some it becomes reality. I know from some things I have read some love it some hate it, for some it just happens. I think if a person is happy with it and is in a place to enjoy it it is simply a life choice like anything else. If you don't like something with your life cant you change it? 

For me like I wrote earlier, it as a fantasy that might become reality, and might not, I am not really bent either way.


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## LillyBBBW (Jun 30, 2008)

largenlovely said:


> There have been a lot of subthreads from the "fantasy to concern" thread. I figured i'd make yet another one lol. I feel that most feeders may fantasize about immobility and the extremes of feederism, but the reality of what they would expect from a mate/girlfriend/wife/boyfriend whatever...is not the same thing. So...i've created a poll and hope that y'all will voice your opinions on the matter
> 
> Would you expect your significant other to be on board with all of your feederism fantasies, including the extreme ones if you have them?



Gender bias!!! I voted sometimes for play but not for real.


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## largenlovely (Jun 30, 2008)

wait..what...really? i tried to avoid that lol



LillyBBBW said:


> Gender bias!!! I voted sometimes for play but not for real.


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## LillyBBBW (Jun 30, 2008)

largenlovely said:


> wait..what...really? i tried to avoid that lol



I'm just pulling your leg girlie. The first poll question says I think most women wouldn't get it, or something like that. Just thought I'd rattle your cage. lol


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## bigsexy920 (Jun 30, 2008)

I actually voted in this poll. I do like to play - but it would never be a lifestyle choice for me. 



LillyBBBW said:


> I voted sometimes for play but not for real.


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## ripley (Jun 30, 2008)

Yup, I enjoy playing a feedee too, sometimes. But it's not an option on this poll! Melissa is a feedee hater!


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## snuggletiger (Jun 30, 2008)

All I would like to do is sit the feedee on my lap and feed her little snacks in between kisses and hugs.


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## Bagalute (Jun 30, 2008)

I really think many people don't appreciate fantasies as much as they should. All you have to do is letting your mind get carried away a bit and voilà - everything you can imagine is possible. That makes it a safe realm imo. Would I want all of my fantasies to become reality? Hell no, plus it's not even possible. After all my SO can't be a nurse, a (big!)bad-ass cop and a seducing lonely housewife at the same time 

When it comes to feeding and weight gain fantasies it's a no-brainer for me - her body, her choice (and vice versa - although Madame has been complaining about my long hair quite a bit recently ). Yes, physically, I'd probably find her more attractive if she gained some more. But since I know she wouldn't be comfortable with it neither of us would be satisfied that way.


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## largenlovely (Jun 30, 2008)

*takes her poll and all her toys and goes to sit in the corner and pout* damn you all to hell!! i'm leaving...hahaha jk jk


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## largenlovely (Jun 30, 2008)

oh dangit i didn't even notice i did that lol



LillyBBBW said:


> I'm just pulling your leg girlie. The first poll question says I think most women wouldn't get it, or something like that. Just thought I'd rattle your cage. lol


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## largenlovely (Jun 30, 2008)

I like to play too..which is why i suppose i can relate to a lot of the fantasies going on around here. Fantasy is soooo not worth worrying over. I mean, people have all kinds of crazy fantasies..why not play them out. So i'm with ya 



bigsexy920 said:


> I actually voted in this poll. I do like to play - but it would never be a lifestyle choice for me.


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## largenlovely (Jun 30, 2008)

a ..not really...sorta kinda...sometimes self hating feedee? lol

I've got more issues than i even know about :doh: lol



ripley said:


> Yup, I enjoy playing a feedee too, sometimes. But it's not an option on this poll! Melissa is a feedee hater!


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## largenlovely (Jun 30, 2008)

welllllllll.....she could, but she'd have to be damn quick at changing clothes lol



Bagalute said:


> Would I want all of my fantasies to become reality? Hell no, plus it's not even possible. After all my SO can't be a nurse, a (big!)bad-ass cop and a seducing lonely housewife at the same time


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## KHayes666 (Jun 30, 2008)

largenlovely said:


> welllllllll.....she could, but she'd have to be damn quick at changing clothes lol



not even The Great Pretenders are that fast lol ;-)


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## LillyBBBW (Jun 30, 2008)

largenlovely said:


> oh dangit i didn't even notice i did that lol



Well, I have to add to my answer anyway. I couldn't pick the first one because it suggests keeping things secret from my partner. That I wouldn't do. At the same time, I woudn't 'expect' my partner to participate since the way my fantasy plays out it's not required anyway, but it would be nice. The second choice seems most appropriate.


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## largenlovely (Jun 30, 2008)

yeah i'm a middle of the road kinda gal myself...I even voted on my own poll.. is that wrong? lol





LillyBBBW said:


> Well, I have to add to my answer anyway. I couldn't pick the first one because it suggests keeping things secret from my partner. That I wouldn't do. At the same time, I woudn't 'expect' my partner to participate since the way my fantasy plays out it's not required anyway, but it would be nice. The second choice seems most appropriate.


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## largenlovely (Jun 30, 2008)

well i dang sure know i'm not....it takes me 20 minutes to get some of my pants on lol



KHayes666 said:


> not even The Great Pretenders are that fast lol ;-)


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## ripley (Jun 30, 2008)

largenlovely said:


> a ..not really...sorta kinda...sometimes self hating feedee? lol
> 
> I've got more issues than i even know about :doh: lol



Nope, a sorta kinda... LOVES FOOD and likes getting boys het up one.


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## largenlovely (Jun 30, 2008)

I'm not always a feedee...i just play one on tv..er... ..well...ok, on MY video camera..same thing LOL (and for fun when the mood strikes, but i'll refrain from TMI lol)




ripley said:


> Nope, a sorta kinda... LOVES FOOD and likes getting boys het up one.


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## Blackjack (Jun 30, 2008)

largenlovely said:


> yeah i'm a middle of the road kinda gal myself...I even voted on my own poll.. is that wrong? lol



Now that's just wrong, that ego masturbation.


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## largenlovely (Jul 1, 2008)

now i can't masterbate? dang..the thought police IS getting bad around here lol



Blackjack said:


> Now that's just wrong, that ego masturbation.


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## LillyBBBW (Jul 1, 2008)

largenlovely said:


> now i can't masterbate? dang..the thought police IS getting bad around here lol



Pay no mind to him. He just wants to stroke your ego himself. :happy:


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## snuggletiger (Jul 1, 2008)

i wouldn't mind stroking a BBW's ego


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## MisterGuy (Jul 1, 2008)

I wouldn't expect a partner to act out all my feederism fantasies, since these fantasies occasionally involve immobility-type scenarios. I just wouldn't expect anyone to get on board with that, unless they already were, and then I'm not sure I'd want to actually take part in it. Actually, I'm pretty sure that I wouldn't want to do it in real life.

That said, it would have to be a prerequisite with me that a long-term partner be open-minded enough to experiment w/ a little gaining. Not talking 100 lbs.--maybe 5 or 10. In the same sense, if I was very seriously into dating a woman into S&M, I would engage in some light role-playing even though it's not my bag. Mutual exploration of each other's fetishes and interests is a big part of having a good relationship, and I would take it as a signal of something a little wrong if the woman was just like "ick, no," right out of the gate.


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## Bagalute (Jul 2, 2008)

snuggletiger said:


> i wouldn't mind stroking a BBW's ego



Damnit, and here I thought I had already discovered all their body parts!


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## ClashCityRocker (Jul 11, 2008)

i'd never expect it...although i've been known to pamper. i never do it with the intention of weight gain, although i let my gf know of the fetish. i probably look like a crazy guy that's trying to fatten her up, but in reality i'm just a guy that likes to cook and make my girl happy. so to answer your question, no, i'd never expect my gf to straight up gain weight...but she can talk like she wants to in bed. that's good enough for me.


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## HEINEKEN (Jul 12, 2008)

"Sometimes, I would like my partner to act them out in intimate moments, but not in reality"...I take it that this is maybe playfull and for pretend...

Maybe some fat talk too! Fat talk really gets me going, I actully know someone that whispered to me once, "I want to get fat, very fat, fatter than my mother, I want to get really squishy and have lots of rolls to look at!"


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## danielnorman2005 (Jul 15, 2008)

Ive been with my girlfriend for nearly two years now and very early in the relationship i let her know that i liked big girls and feeding them. Im not sure where i stand realy because whilst she doesnt realy want to gain weight for me, and isnt trying to gain weight, it hasnt stoped her from gaining 70 - 80 lbs (with her current weight being about 285lbs). I havnt asked her to gain weight or forced her to eat lots... its just shes a bit of a lazy pig lol. When she comes home from work i find McDonnalds or KFC wrappers or chocolate bar wrappers in her car daily, and shel still ask whats for dinner and spends the rest of the day either on the sofa or lying in bed watching TV... which is great for me and i dont ask her to stop at all, but i dont expect anything from her... it just seams as though its happening anyway. So err, what im saying is... what category should i vote for lol?


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## LillyBBBW (Jul 15, 2008)

You sound like a middle of the road guy who lucked out. Maybe both of you did. 




danielnorman2005 said:


> Ive been with my girlfriend for nearly two years now and very early in the relationship i let her know that i liked big girls and feeding them. Im not sure where i stand realy because whilst she doesnt realy want to gain weight for me, and isnt trying to gain weight, it hasnt stoped her from gaining 70 - 80 lbs (with her current weight being about 285lbs). I havnt asked her to gain weight or forced her to eat lots... its just shes a bit of a lazy pig lol. When she comes home from work i find McDonnalds or KFC wrappers or chocolate bar wrappers in her car daily, and shel still ask whats for dinner and spends the rest of the day either on the sofa or lying in bed watching TV... which is great for me and i dont ask her to stop at all, but i dont expect anything from her... it just seams as though its happening anyway. So err, what im saying is... what category should i vote for lol?


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## olwen (Jul 15, 2008)

MisterGuy said:


> I wouldn't expect a partner to act out all my feederism fantasies, since these fantasies occasionally involve immobility-type scenarios. I just wouldn't expect anyone to get on board with that, unless they already were, and then I'm not sure I'd want to actually take part in it. Actually, I'm pretty sure that I wouldn't want to do it in real life.
> 
> That said, it would have to be a prerequisite with me that a long-term partner be open-minded enough to experiment w/ a little gaining. Not talking 100 lbs.--maybe 5 or 10. In the same sense, if I was very seriously into dating a woman into S&M, I would engage in some light role-playing even though it's not my bag. Mutual exploration of each other's fetishes and interests is a big part of having a good relationship, and I would take it as a signal of something a little wrong if the woman was just like "ick, no," right out of the gate.



Dude, there's role playing and then there's role playing. I can't imagine SM without some kind of role playing aspect even on the most basic level, otherwise it's just vanilla sex with a little kink thrown in. 

There's boundaries and then there's boundaries. I'm VERY open minded, but I still have limits. Even SM players have ick factors. Everybody has limits. It's a little unrealistic to expect your partners to not say "ick" about something. And too just because someone has a limit doesn't mean they won't consent to having that limit pushed a little. That's what open-mindedness is to me - a willingness to push those boundaries. Crossing the boundaries isn't necessary, just the willingness to try.


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## olwen (Jul 15, 2008)

LillyBBBW said:


> You sound like a middle of the road guy who lucked out. Maybe both of you did.



I was thinking the same thing.


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## LoveBHMS (Jul 15, 2008)

olwen said:


> Dude, there's role playing and then there's role playing. I can't imagine SM without some kind of role playing aspect even on the most basic level, otherwise it's just vanilla sex with a little kink thrown in.
> 
> There's boundaries and then there's boundaries. I'm VERY open minded, but I still have limits. Even SM players have ick factors. Everybody has limits. It's a little unrealistic to expect your partners to not say "ick" about something. And too just because someone has a limit doesn't mean they won't consent to having that limit pushed a little. That's what open-mindedness is to me - a willingness to push those boundaries. Crossing the boundaries isn't necessary, just the willingness to try.



Exactly. You need to figure out if it's "Ick. No. No way not ever because that is just awful" or "Ick. And that ick was a reflexive ick because honestly I find it arousing and/or intriguing but I can't admit it, certainly not to you and maybe not to myself as of yet. But push me a bit, ok?"


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## ThinkingFA (Sep 28, 2008)

For me the issue is with the word "expectation." It makes it seem like job where in which you'll evaluate your partner. For me it's more like a wish. I wish I could fatten my wife some more. I wish she would actively participate. I wish she also fantasized about gaining weight, enjoyed the weigh-ins, teased me with how fat she is and how fat she'll become. 

At this point, after 17 years of marriage, I count myself lucky because she hasn't talked about a diet in years. She eats whatever I cook or bake and occassionally eats in bed. Today she's driving to Florida to see her mom and called to tell me about the large chocolate dipped cone she ate at Dairy Queen. She's gained about 100 pounds since we first met and loves that I find it so sexy. 

On the other hand, there is so much more to marriage than sex and the things that turn me on. She's the mother of my daughter. She can make a friend standing in line at the grocery store. She takes care of the details of our social life so I don't have to. She's grateful that she's my wife. I'm grateful that she's my wife. So I'm content to keep my fantasy life and my real life separate.


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## Allie Cat (Sep 30, 2008)

I haven't responded to this thread yet, despite voting in it a few months ago, so here goes.

I voted that I usually do not bring up my fantasies and desires for fear of creeping people out. However, it's rather hard for me to lie... at least, convincingly... so people usually end up finding out pretty quickly anyway. I'd love it if I could find someone who would indulge me in them, but I don't expect that to actually ever happen... so I won't be too bummed if it doesn't.


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## Fuzzy Necromancer (Sep 30, 2008)

I have trouble with the wording of the poll question. "I expect my partner to" is very different from "I would like my partner to", but expect is in the question, and like is in the answers, so which one do I go by? =s


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## Sirkaril (Oct 1, 2008)

I wouldn't ask my lover to fufill my fantasies about feederism unless she was also into them. I eventually do tell them about them, and if they are cool with it, rock on. If not, no big deal.


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## largenlovely (Oct 1, 2008)

well i think that there are some people out there who DO expect a partner to be completely on board with all of their fantasies...now, whether or not they'll find someone to meet those expectations is a whole other story 

Which, the entire point of this was to see who expected these things in real life... and who would just desire a partner who would be accepting and live some of these things out in fantasy periodically


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## Fuzzy Necromancer (Oct 1, 2008)

I guess I just don't find the responses quite suited to my range of reactions =s

I mean I'd like a partner to act out these fantasies in real life, but I don't be any means expect it.


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## thatgirl08 (Oct 1, 2008)

I have feederism related fantasies but I do not in any way want to actually gain weight - for health and personal reasons. My ideal situation would be to find someone who could appreciate me at the size I am, and be satisfied with that, but would also occasionally like to act out fantasies in "intimate" moments. I'd like to keep this as more of just a sexual thing, rather than making a lifestyle out of it [does that make sense?]


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## Buttons (Oct 1, 2008)

thatgirl08 said:


> I have feederism related fantasies but I do not in any way want to actually gain weight - for health and personal reasons. My ideal situation would be to find someone who could appreciate me at the size I am, and be satisfied with that, but would also occasionally like to act out fantasies in "intimate" moments. I'd like to keep this as more of just a sexual thing, rather than making a lifestyle out of it [does that make sense?]



Perfect sense.


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## KHayes666 (Oct 2, 2008)

thatgirl08 said:


> I have feederism related fantasies but I do not in any way want to actually gain weight - for health and personal reasons. My ideal situation would be to find someone who could appreciate me at the size I am, and be satisfied with that, but would also occasionally like to act out fantasies in "intimate" moments. I'd like to keep this as more of just a sexual thing, rather than making a lifestyle out of it [does that make sense?]



It makes a lot of sense actually. When you're intimate with someone, your deepest desires come out in the heat of the moment. Its much better to talk about your fantasies in sexual experiences rather than actually act them out when someone isn't really into it.


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## Tad (Oct 2, 2008)

thatgirl08 said:


> I have feederism related fantasies but I do not in any way want to actually gain weight - for health and personal reasons. My ideal situation would be to find someone who could appreciate me at the size I am, and be satisfied with that, but would also occasionally like to act out fantasies in "intimate" moments. I'd like to keep this as more of just a sexual thing, rather than making a lifestyle out of it [does that make sense?]



Thatgirl, I agree with you and the others who have responded: it makes good sense. I've long argued that for those who like gain, either in themselves or in a partner, it makes best sense to stop gaining at the lowest weight they feasibly can (based on their body, desires, etc). Because it seems that for those who have these desires, the desire to gain won't go away, no matter what size you are. Hence sooner or later you have to deal with resisting that desire, and you might as well do it a size that suits the rest of your life.

(I go on about this in more lenght on one of the essays on my web page, but that is the heart of it)


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## growingman (Oct 2, 2008)

I have resisted the urge to gain until recent years and have always been athletic, but after meeting a few FFeeders I gave into the fantasy and grew a round ball belly, which I still have. The FFeeders and have since gone different directions, leaving me with my belly and the craving to meet another woman feeder like I have some kind of addiction. 

Yet unless I knew a woman had that interest I don't think I would share my thoughts. Most people seem to find feederism so odd. If I find another FFeeder interested in a relationship, it is very likely I will move forward with it because we share that common interest, but with other women and people in general I would never disclose about it.

There are many interests to share in life. It is not hard to find other interests which are interesting and fun. I always enjoy the time I spend and the things I learn in relationships. Finding a woman feeder for a ltr would be awesome especially if we shared other interests too, but it is not the only reason to have a relationship.


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