# Do you ever get upset people call you fat?



## mjb1968 (Jan 24, 2010)

I do quite often and it still hurts even when I do not know the person. Am I being too sensitive? Does anyone else feel the same way? How do I get a date after 4 years of not having a date even?


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## chicken legs (Jan 24, 2010)

mjb1968 said:


> I do quite often and it still hurts even when I do not know the person. Am I being too sensitive? Does anyone else feel the same way? How do I get a date after 4 years of not having a date even?



You can always play off the fat jokes like Brendon Frasier while he was on Jimmy Fallon.


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## lovelocs (Jan 25, 2010)

chicken legs said:


> You can always play off the fat jokes like Brendon Frasier while he was on Jimmy Fallon.




He got outted as a chub on national TV. Nice recovery, though.

You know what, very few people call me fat. Could be because I'm from Wisconsin, where we're all fat, or it could be that I don't notice because I'm kinda busy doing me. Sometimes other people imply things... Usually people who are somehow threatened. Sometimes I work to be less threatening, but usually I keep rolling on, and it never sticks. 

So if someone calls you fat, work on distracting yourself from it. Do something to make yourself a better person, or concentrate on things you've already done. 

Or tell a joke and play it off...

As for dating, everyone wants a winner. Concentrate on the things that make you a winner. Maybe you haven't thought about them in a while, but they're there.


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## BigChaz (Jan 25, 2010)

Hell no. It doesn't hurt me that they call me fat. I am fat, I know that. Big whoop. It also doesn't hurt me that the person calling me fat is doing so make me feel bad or down about myself. What makes me *mad* is the lack of respect / manners / civility it signifies. On the rare occasions someone calls me fat where I am meant to hear it it, I just grab my belly and look down and go "HOLY SHIT, WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN? Oh well, its better than being ugly!"

Thats pretty much verbatim what I say every time and they end up looking like the doofus.


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## Geodetic_Effect (Jan 25, 2010)

If it upsets you when people call you fat, you must not like being fat. In which case you should probably just stop being fat.


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## RentonBob (Jan 25, 2010)

Now, I would probably go back to them and say "you have this great opportunity to come up with an awesome fat joke and all you got is hey, your fat!, what a waste, you're sad" and then walk away


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## BigChaz (Jan 25, 2010)

Geodetic_Effect said:


> If it upsets you when people call you fat, you must not like being fat. In which case you should probably just stop being fat.



I'm having a hard time understanding the tone of your post.

Are you saying it in the manner of "If you are on dimensions and in the BHM/FFA forum you should enjoy being fat, so if you are not get out of the club!"

Or are you saying "If you are not comfortable being fat, maybe you could try losing weight and seeing how you feel?"

Or is it a mixture of both? Are you being mean? Are you being helpful? I can't tell. Your post is like a passable tranny. I blame this post on alcohol and 12:48AM.


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## BigChaz (Jan 25, 2010)

RentonBob said:


> Now, I would probably go back to them and say "you have this great opportunity to come up with an awesome fat joke and all you got is hey, your fat!, what a waste, you're sad" and then walk away



Take off your shirt and give it to him. Then tell him "hey have my shirt. You can wear it and say "I made fun of a fat guy and all I got was his gigantic shirt.""

Pratical? no. Likely to ever happen? no. Fun to think about? yeah, a bit.


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## RentonBob (Jan 25, 2010)

BigChaz said:


> Take off your shirt and give it to him. Then tell him "hey have my shirt. You can wear it and say "I made fun of a fat guy and all I got was his gigantic shirt.""
> 
> Pratical? no. Likely to ever happen? no. Fun to think about? yeah, a bit.



LOL... If they didn't charge so much for our clothing that would be pretty damn funny


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## kittencat (Jan 25, 2010)

there was a guy who wanted to go on a date with me) but he just wanted sex).And when i said im not going to have sex with you please leave me alone he said*well your a fat girl* and i said*yeah and hot enough for you to bother cus you wanted to do me*in which case i laughed.It shouldnt bother you to much(cus your prolly the hawtness).But i get how a stranger saying that can be hurtful*hugs*


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## escapist (Jan 25, 2010)

I gotta go with what my Girl Chicken Legs said. Once you start verbally exaggerating your own shortcomings you may begin to realize how incredibly silly it is to have crippling hang-ups about them. I taught this to a young pimpster who was having trouble in school. Kids would ridicule him about every little thing. I showed him how he could flip the script then totally blow it out of proportion and use his own creative mind to showcase his quick wit and fun loving personality.

I spoke with him a few months after this happened. Things have seriously changed for him now. He no longer constantly gets teased and tooled by other guys, and has started to cultivate his own group of great friends who actually respect him.



PM me if you need to know more


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## Geodetic_Effect (Jan 25, 2010)

BigChaz said:


> I'm having a hard time understanding the tone of your post.
> 
> Are you saying it in the manner of "If you are on dimensions and in the BHM/FFA forum you should enjoy being fat, so if you are not get out of the club!"
> 
> ...




No alcohol and not meant to be derogatory. Just my thought after reading the original post. If you don't like something about yourself then yes you should try to change it.


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## ClockworkOrange (Jan 25, 2010)

I usually just act like I have no idea what they're talking about (like "what? I'm fat? that's craaaazy"), or retort with something like "sky is blue dude, water is wet, congratulations." 

Personally it doesn't really matter to me because the kind of person who will call you fat in an attempt to hurt your feelings is the kind of person you don't want in your life anyway. Be glad they reveal themselves sooner rather than later.


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## DreamyInToronto (Jan 25, 2010)

mjb1968 said:


> I do quite often and it still hurts even when I do not know the person. Am I being too sensitive? Does anyone else feel the same way? How do I get a date after 4 years of not having a date even?




hi mjb1968. I do not get upset if people call me fat when they are just stating fact... i.e. Kelley is fat and she likes fat guys. But if someone yells on the street who I don't know "hey fatty" or something like that then yes I get very upset. I also hate being called "grossly obese" which is EVERYTIME I go to the doctor's office now. 

Anyhow, I am sending you big hugs and kisses and I hope that you feel better soon. I think you're probably HOT and the person calling you fat was just jealous and trying to make you feel down. 

xoxo

DreamyInToronto


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## Paquito (Jan 25, 2010)

Geodetic_Effect said:


> If it upsets you when people call you fat, you must not like being fat. *In which case you should probably just stop being fat.*



Yea, because every fat person who hated being fat has been able to lose weight. It's that simple. 

If someone calls me fat, I usually just commend them on their keen observational skills and then walk away.


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## johnnytattoos (Jan 25, 2010)

Some of us weirdos actually get turned on when called fat. Just sayin.


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## djudex (Jan 25, 2010)

ClockworkOrange said:


> I usually just act like I have no idea what they're talking about (like "what? I'm fat? that's craaaazy"), or retort with something like "sky is blue dude, water is wet, congratulations."



In the past when people have made a comment like "omg you're so huge!" I've actually looked down, feigned shock and terror, grabbed my belly and attempted to tear it off while running around in circles saying something like "Oh dear God how did this get here?!?!". It's amazing how much fun it can be :happy:


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## Geodetic_Effect (Jan 25, 2010)

free2beme04 said:


> Yea, because every fat person who hated being fat has been able to lose weight. It's that simple.



It is that simple. Everyone is able to lose weight.


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## escapist (Jan 25, 2010)

Geodetic_Effect said:


> It is that simple. Everyone is able to lose weight.



Yep, well a ware that I'm fat by choice. Every time I eat a donut, don't go for a walk, or don't keep track of how many calories I'm eating in a day I'm making a choice. I've never had bigest looser weight loss numbers but I have lost 70 lbs in just 3 months of paying attention and exercising 20-40 minutes a day.


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## seasuperchub84 (Jan 25, 2010)

I take pride in it  Im like hell yeah :eat1:


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## squurp (Jan 25, 2010)

Geodetic_Effect said:


> If it upsets you when people call you fat, you must not like being fat. In which case you should probably just stop being fat.



If only it were that simple! Come on now, use your brain. If it was simply a matter of choice, every diet gimmick would work. fact is, none of them do.

I see as I look, that I am the second person that said something to this effect, and you follow it by an equally ignorant and bigoted comment regarding fat people. So, here is a more serious response. 

Obesity is a result of genetics, epigenetics, psychological and sociological issues, and to a small degree, diet and exercise. It may also be triggered by viral or bacterial interference. 

Diet and exercise in general can only safely move a persons weight 30(ish) pounds in either direction. While it is possible to lose or gain more, the body makes it very difficult. people who are predisposed to thinness and forced to live a lifestyle that would cause them to gain weight, CANNOT gain weight, and when forced the body responds with diarrhea, vomiting, loss of appetite and etc. And, the reverse is true for those that try to lose. There is significant research on this, and i have posted this in other posts, so go ahead and do a search, I don't care to retype or copy/paste it. Simply put, diet and exercise are small percentage of what control a person's body weight.


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## Geodetic_Effect (Jan 25, 2010)

squurp said:


> If only it were that simple! Come on now, use your brain. If it was simply a matter of choice, every diet gimmick would work. fact is, none of them do.
> 
> I see as I look, that I am the second person that said something to this effect, and you follow it by an equally ignorant and bigoted comment regarding fat people. So, here is a more serious response.
> 
> ...




That is laughable. Research published in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition shows that genetic predisposition may be responsible for less than one percent of obesity. And even if you are in that very small percentage, weight loss is still easy to achieve through diet and exercise. Exercise being more important than diet.

http://www.ajcn.org/cgi/content/citation/91/1/5

http://www.ajcn.org/cgi/content/abstract/91/1/184


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## MaryElizabethAntoinette (Jan 25, 2010)

johnnytattoos said:


> Some of us weirdos actually get turned on when called fat. Just sayin.



Awesome. Just... awesome.


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## MaryElizabethAntoinette (Jan 25, 2010)

As many people have said previous, it all depends on the person who's calling you fat.
Chris loves it when I remind him how big he is and when I tease him about his weight. So in that sense, it's enjoyable. But that's because I have good intentions when saying, "fat". I can't speak for Chris, but when people are trying to be mean by calling him fat, I don't think he's that affected by it either... because he enjoys his size. But hey, if I'm wrong... Chris can correct me.



To transfer this to us FFA's... I gotta change the initial question: *Do you ever get upset when people call you sick for finding fat attractive? *

Because I'm so open about what I like, or rather, because everyone knows what I like... when I meet new people, it's bound to come out that I love fat men (whether I mention it, or not). Half the time I get the confused reaction, as if I'm joking. A quarter of the time I get a reaction of indifference (ya know, the whole, "You like what you like, whatever."), and the remaining quarter of people... are cruel about it. 
I've had people raise their voice at me, call me a sick pervert, and tell me there's something seriously wrong with me. (Lucky me, I'm so comfortable with my reality that their opinions don't change my mind).

So I'm wondering if any other FFA's have gotten such unkind reactions.


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## LoveBHMS (Jan 25, 2010)

MaryElizabethAntoinette said:


> As many people have said previous, it all depends on the person who's calling you fat.
> Chris loves it when I remind him how big he is and when I tease him about his weight. So in that sense, it's enjoyable. But that's because I have good intentions when saying, "fat". I can't speak for Chris, but when people are trying to be mean by calling him fat, I don't think he's that affected by it either... because he enjoys his size. But hey, if I'm wrong... Chris can correct me.
> 
> 
> ...



I've gotten them but I find them annoying rather than actually upsetting. I posted about this on the F/FA board but I had a coworker tell me he could understand why somebody would like fat women but that fat guys were gross. Which was kinda rude but at the same time, he's as entitled to his feelings as I am. I can't say anyone's ever been cruel; most reactions have been either of the "whatever..." sort or maybe negative "ewww. I hate fat guys" but never anything rising to the level of cruel.


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## Melian (Jan 25, 2010)

Geodetic_Effect said:


> That is laughable. Research published in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition shows that genetic predisposition may be responsible for less than one percent of obesity. And even if you are in that very small percentage, weight loss is still easy to achieve through diet and exercise. Exercise being more important than diet.



Not exactly a high impact journal....

Also, genetic studies of obesity are inherently flawed, as they are broadly interrogating the genome for loci related to obesity when there isn't a definitive set of obesity-related genes! Did you notice what they examined in this study? Twelve SNPs from 12 loci associated with BMI. That's it, out of millions of SNPs and all the coding/non-coding sequences, they picked 12 single bases from 12 genes that are believed to associate with a poor body mass measure. How they believe they can prove or disprove anything with this study - *that *is laughable.


Look, I'm not trying to say that anyone who wants to lose weight should just blame it on their genes and give up, however, just because something is physically possible doesn't mean that it is easily achievable for a significant percentage of the population. As mentioned by another poster, if it is so easy to lose weight, then why is the diet industry thriving at the expense of millions of failed diets? Have you ever tried to lose weight? If not, how can you really comment on how easy it is to do so? If you have, then why are you still fat?


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## Teleute (Jan 25, 2010)

Geodetic_Effect said:


> No alcohol and not meant to be derogatory. Just my thought after reading the original post. If you don't like something about yourself then yes you should try to change it.



I get what you're saying (although I think weight loss is significantly more complicated and difficult for many people than you stated), but I also think that it's worth helping people be happy with who they are NOW or at least showing them that being fat is not always as terrible a thing as most of the world makes it out to be. The OP has all of two posts; this is all probably quite new to him, and I would hardly expect everyone to be all "WOOOO BEING FAT ROCKS" when they join, especially given the pressure in the real world. It seems to me that it would be much more reasonable and productive to give the OP some defensive techniques for these unquestionably uncomfortable situations, and in the meantime let him see that lots of us are happy and sometimes even quite proud of our fat selves. If he's still not happy with himself after some time around size acceptance (and I would expect that many people would not be), then sure - change something, make yourself more physically/mentally comfortable. But given the overwhelming negative attitude toward being fat outside of this place, I think that newbies should get a bit softer of a landing than "well, lose weight if you're not happy"... no?


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## Geodetic_Effect (Jan 25, 2010)

Melian said:


> Not exactly a high impact journal....
> 
> Also, genetic studies of obesity are inherently flawed, as they are broadly interrogating the genome for loci related to obesity when there isn't a definitive set of obesity-related genes! Did you notice what they examined in this study? Twelve SNPs associated with BMI. That's it, out of millions of SNPs and all the coding/non-coding sequences, they picked 12 single bases that are believed to associate with a poor body mass measure. How they believe they can prove or disprove anything with this study - *that *is laughable.
> 
> ...




All scientific studies are inherently flawed. Especially in the health field. I'm just using that study as an example, supporting my experiences and observations. What is laughable is saying that diet and exercise will not produce effective weight loss. The reason fad diets fail is because they are gimmicks. Their goal is to make money not to produce healthy and effective weight loss. If a sound nutrition and fitness program is followed, the vast majority of obese people will achieve significant weight loss over time. I have lost weight, well changed body composition. When I say weight loss I am usually referring to a loss in Body Fat percentage. I choose to stay fat. Everyone knows the negatives of excess body fat, but no one factors in the positives. One, body fat is survival food. I have approximately 143.81 pounds of body fat. Which is about 587,080.08 calories. Not including micronutrient deficiencies, if I burn 4,000 calories/day in a survival situation I could survive for around 147 days without food. This is obviously not an exact science because of the many, many variables involved, but it holds true that in general, more body fat equals longer survival without food. This is why your body stores fat. Second, fat is good insulation. It will keep you warm making it take much longer for hypothermia to set in. Third fat makes an excellent body armor, protecting vital organs from blunt trauma, stab wounds, bullet wounds, etc. When lifting certain objects I can push against them with my stomach giving me a mechanical advantage. I use my fat as a shelf occasionally and when my hands get cold I shove them under my belly fat. I also just enjoy being large.That being said, I have yet to achieve what I would call an optimal balance between the positive and negative effects of body fat. I have around 70 pounds less body fat than I did a few years ago. I will probably continue to lose some until I reach what I feel is optimal. I am estimating this will be right around the 300 pound mark. I take it slowly so I can have an evaluation period at my new composition. This way i can really test it out and see how I like it.


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## Melian (Jan 25, 2010)

Geodetic_Effect said:


> All scientific studies are inherently flawed. Especially in the health field. I'm just using that study as an example, supporting my experiences and observations.



Very true - it's nearly impossible to "prove" anything 100% in the biological sciences (or other sciences). My main issue with obesity studies is that they often fail to address even the most basic confounding factors, external influences, subject differences, technological limitations, etc etc etc, that studies in other fields manage to resolve. I have personally genotyped thousands of samples, and picked out some huge flaws in their study design - it just seems like if the topic was not obesity, and the drug companies/fear mongers weren't pushing to publish ANY damning studies, they would be taken to task by peer reviewers and editors for their oversights.




Geodetic_Effect said:


> What is laughable is saying that diet and exercise will not produce effective weight loss. The reason fad diets fail is because they are gimmicks. Their goal is to make money not to produce healthy and effective weight loss. If a sound nutrition and fitness program is followed, the vast majority of obese people will achieve significant weight loss over time. I have lost weight, well changed body composition. When I say weight loss I am usually referring to a loss in Body Fat percentage. I choose to stay fat. Everyone knows the negatives of excess body fat, but no one factors in the positives. One, body fat is survival food. I have approximately 143.81 pounds of body fat. Which is about 587,080.08 calories. Not including micronutrient deficiencies, if I burn 4,000 calories/day in a survival situation I could survive for around 147 days without food. This is obviously not an exact science because of the many, many variables involved, but it holds true that in general, more body fat equals longer survival without food. This is why your body stores fat. Second, fat is good insulation. It will keep you warm making it take much longer for hypothermia to set in. Third fat makes an excellent body armor, protecting vital organs from blunt trauma, stab wounds, bullet wounds, etc. When lifting certain objects I can push against them with my stomach giving me a mechanical advantage. I use my fat as a shelf occasionally and when my hands get cold I shove them under my belly fat. I also just enjoy being large.That being said, I have yet to achieve what I would call an optimal balance between the positive and negative effects of body fat. I have around 70 pounds less body fat than I did a few years ago. I will probably continue to lose some until I reach what I feel is optimal. I am estimating this will be right around the 300 pound mark. I take it slowly so I can have an evaluation period at my new composition. This way i can really test it out and see how I like it.



You know, the thing with some commercial diets is that they WOULD work...if people followed them as specified. Of course, they are so intolerable that barely anyone will want to follow them, so the majority of people fail. Anyway, the reason I feel compelled to comment when someone says that losing weight is easy, is because I've watched my dad try to lose weight (doctor/nutritionist-supervised) for nearly 20 years and, while he does try VERY hard, he hasn't lost anything (maybe gained a bit from his starting point). He's not a stupid guy who lounges around all day eating McDonalds' greaseballs, and then wonders why he's fat - he really makes an effort, and it is futile. I'm glad that you are able to maintain your ideal body composition, but realize that a lot of people struggle immensely in an attempt to do what seems to come more naturally to you.


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## Geodetic_Effect (Jan 25, 2010)

Melian said:


> You know, the thing with some commercial diets is that they WOULD work...if people followed them as specified. Of course, they are so intolerable that barely anyone will want to follow them, so the majority of people fail. Anyway, the reason I feel compelled to comment when someone says that losing weight is easy, is because I've watched my dad try to lose weight (doctor/nutritionist-supervised) for nearly 20 years and, while he does try VERY hard, he hasn't lost anything (maybe gained a bit from his starting point). He's not a stupid guy who lounges around all day eating McDonalds' greaseballs, and then wonders why he's fat - he really makes an effort, and it is futile. I'm glad that you are able to maintain your ideal body composition, but realize that a lot of people struggle immensely in an attempt to do what seems to come more naturally to you.



It's not that it came naturally. I went through a lot of bullshit information and strategies before finding the truth. I think the biggest problem with commercial diets is the focus on quantities. Specific macronutrient ratios, amounts of certain foods, calorie counting. Focus should be more on quality of food. A simple effective nutrition plan is eat as natural as possible and eat what you like. Avoiding modern processing is a huge factor. There is a lot of bad information out there. I've worked with a lot of people on similar problems. Modern advice on the subject of diet, including recommendations of a lot of doctors and nutritionists seems to be quite wrong. An excellent book on food quality and nutrition is "Nutrition and Physical Degeneration" By Dr. Weston A. Price. The same is true with fitness. The typical gym program of isolating muscle groups with machines that you use 3 days a week combined with 20 minutes of cardio on an elliptical is just not that effective. Fitness programs need whole body, functional movements through a full range of motion. And must include free weights no matter what the goal is. Intensity and variety are also very important. As I've noticed on a lot of issues, conventional wisdom should not be accepted as truth because it is usually wrong.


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## Teleute (Jan 25, 2010)

I think this discussion, while valuable, is perhaps not in the most appropriate thread (see my previous post, which I think you may have missed because we posted at the same time, for why the weight loss talk might be best held for later). Very much worth having in a separate thread or in the health board, though.


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## Geodetic_Effect (Jan 25, 2010)

Teleute said:


> I think this discussion, while valuable, is perhaps not in the most appropriate thread (see my previous post, which I think you may have missed because we posted at the same time, for why the weight loss talk might be best held for later). Very much worth having in a separate thread or in the health board, though.




Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.


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## Ninja Glutton (Jan 25, 2010)

kittencat said:


> there was a guy who wanted to go on a date with me) but he just wanted sex).And when i said im not going to have sex with you please leave me alone he said*well your a fat girl* and i said*yeah and hot enough for you to bother cus you wanted to do me*in which case i laughed.It shouldnt bother you to much(cus your prolly the hawtness).But i get how a stranger saying that can be hurtful*hugs*



Aw that's such a douchey thing to say! I would've put him in a fat chokehold.

I'm glad you're confident enough not to let it bother you, though.

The only thing that bothers me is when people I barely know start making all these fat wisecracks to be funny in front of my long-time friends. Like, I feel like you have to earn that right to be razzing me in public. It's kind of rude.


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## Tyrael (Jan 25, 2010)

Mostly i dont reply on any insults and let it be.
Im not the person for such conversation..


Let alone if they push it to far, thats a diffrent story..


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## Teleute (Jan 25, 2010)

Geodetic_Effect said:


> Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.



Sure, I wasn't trying to police the thread - just trying to get back to helping the OP. Feel free to keep spreading your bountiful wisdom; it sure as hell isn't my job to keep you from looking like a douche.

mjb1968 - it does really suck that people are giving you shit. That kind of stuff can always sting a bit just because you know the person is TRYING to hurt you, even if what they're saying doesn't particularly bother you. People have given good advice about playing it off with humor; I'd work on that for starters. Check out past threads here and on the main board to find Also, posting pics on here will get you a definite ego boost - we FFAs are always appreciative of pictures! :eat2: Might even help with the dating issue, you never know


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## Teleute (Jan 25, 2010)

Ninja Glutton said:


> The only thing that bothers me is when people I barely know start making all these fat wisecracks to be funny in front of my long-time friends. Like, I feel like you have to earn that right to be razzing me in public. It's kind of rude.



I totally agree with this - my friends and I throw a lot of insults around, but it's something that you have to be close enough to us to participate in.


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## Geodetic_Effect (Jan 25, 2010)

Teleute said:


> I think this discussion, while valuable, is perhaps not in the most appropriate thread



To clear things up, this discussion is appropriate for the thread. I'm all about efficiency. How does it help to mask the symptom rather than treat the cause. The first cause involved is that people can be assholes. Nothing you say or do can change this. So there is no point wasting time on it. Another cause is a matter of self esteem and caring what people think or say about you. Depending where the root of this problem lies, it can be pretty complicated to solve. Which brings us to the specific issue of not liking your own fatness. Compared to the other causes this one is relatively easy to solve and can even help the self esteem issue. Just the satisfaction of accomplishing the goal of weight loss and increased physical fitness can do wonders for you confidence and self esteem. On top of that, chemical imbalances can result from poor nutrition and fitness. Correcting these problems can change your outlook on life and possibly solve the entire issue on its own. Telling someone to just be happy with who they are sounds great, but for a person in that situation, willing themselves happy is probably not going to happen. Trying to mask your agitation with jokes doesn't solve anything. It's just a way of coping. Starting with things you can actually have an effect on in a relatively short amount of time is much more efficient. I do agree that posting pics and getting involved with discussions on this site can be very helpful.


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## 99Haints (Jan 25, 2010)

johnnytattoos said:


> Some of us weirdos actually get turned on when called fat. Just sayin.



Ew gross, those weirdos should be in a zoo! In the elephant cage...surrounded by peanuts and the laughter of women, where they're constantly forced to..:blush:nevermind.


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## squurp (Jan 25, 2010)

Geodetic_Effect said:


> All scientific studies are inherently flawed. Especially in the health field. I'm just using that study as an example, supporting my experiences and observations. What is laughable is saying that diet and exercise will not produce effective weight loss. The reason fad diets fail is because they are gimmicks. Their goal is to make money not to produce healthy and effective weight loss. If a sound nutrition and fitness program is followed, the vast majority of obese people will achieve significant weight loss over time. I have lost weight, well changed body composition. When I say weight loss I am usually referring to a loss in Body Fat percentage. I choose to stay fat. Everyone knows the negatives of excess body fat, but no one factors in the positives. One, body fat is survival food. I have approximately 143.81 pounds of body fat. Which is about 587,080.08 calories. Not including micronutrient deficiencies, if I burn 4,000 calories/day in a survival situation I could survive for around 147 days without food. This is obviously not an exact science because of the many, many variables involved, but it holds true that in general, more body fat equals longer survival without food. This is why your body stores fat. Second, fat is good insulation. It will keep you warm making it take much longer for hypothermia to set in. Third fat makes an excellent body armor, protecting vital organs from blunt trauma, stab wounds, bullet wounds, etc. When lifting certain objects I can push against them with my stomach giving me a mechanical advantage. I use my fat as a shelf occasionally and when my hands get cold I shove them under my belly fat. I also just enjoy being large.That being said, I have yet to achieve what I would call an optimal balance between the positive and negative effects of body fat. I have around 70 pounds less body fat than I did a few years ago. I will probably continue to lose some until I reach what I feel is optimal. I am estimating this will be right around the 300 pound mark. I take it slowly so I can have an evaluation period at my new composition. This way i can really test it out and see how I like it.



Ok, I cannot view the article you linked to, but this article is inherently biased. A journal about nutrition and exercise - well, they are not going to publish an article that says nutrition and exercise are insignificant, even if it is true - think about it. MUCH research is published with a goal in mind. ANd, if so, it is biased, and not valid until results are reproduced multiple times in unbiased studies. So, let's go through what we know. I should note, the research here is only a portion of the research that supports this perspective.

The first and largest misconception about obesity in general, is that obesity results simply from an imbalance of calories taken in and calories expended through physical exercise.* This is a particularly easy misconception to believe, especially for those people that are thin.* After all, it allows thin people to believe they are "better" than those out of control, overweight or obese people.* In actually Obesity is a very complex issue, and its causes are not what most people think.

Please allow me to explain and present you with some reading material.* 

We now know that genetics are the codes that control for how we as humans develop.* this is not new science.* Genetics as a field began as early as 50 years ago.* Genetics control a great deal of our lives - more in fact, than we care to admit.* There are many examples, here are just a few:
http://www.times.com/books/first/w/wright-twins.html
*

http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_qn4161/is_20030413/ai_n12863703/
*

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/1567542/Identical-twins-reunited-after-35-years.html
*


There are a great deal more twin studies, that show just how strong the genetic pull is on us as human beings.* So, is obesity genetic?* Simple answer:* yes.* This article gives the basic premise:
http://discovermagazine.com/2007/may/mendel2019s-mouse
*
* 

Here is an excerpt:
Recently Churchill and his Jackson Laboratory colleagues decided to go after some big genetic game, the gene network that controls body weight. "With 300 million people now suffering from obesity worldwide, fat has become a global epidemic.. . .The map they came up with looks like a flowchart from hell. Churchills group identified a dozen sites in the mouse genome where genes are influencing the body weight of mice. But the genes have different effects. Some make mice large-bodied, and being big makes mice more likely to get fat. But they also found genes that had separate effects on both body size and fat levels. In some cases, the same gene could make a mouse both big and lean. Other genes influenced only how fat the mice were, with no effect on their body size. Still other genes determined the size of different fat pads. One region of mouse DNA appears to make mice fat overall while actually making the fat pads on their haunches smaller."
This article basically provides strong evidence of a matrix of 15-20 genes in mice that control obesity .* Researchers, looking at past comparisons of mice and humans can only conclude that this a similar matrix of genes in humans.* And simple observation supports this.* For example, people of certain ethnic groups - (samoans, as an example), tend to be heavier in certain areas of their bodies, whether they live in samoa, or Denmark.* 
So simple genetics?* The problem with blaming everything on genetics, is why the recent epidemic of obesity right?* This is a two faceted problem.* The first facet of this problem is the inflationary scare tactics and flawed research of the diet industry.* The diet/exercise* industry (which DEPENDS on the illusion of calories in, calories out) has funded billions of dollars of research to prove calories in calories out, so they can continue to sell ineffective products.* They've then used this research and billions more to sway politicians like yourself!* This article shows just the tip of the iceberg of this phenomena:
http://edition.cnn.com/HEALTH/9806/17/weight.guidelines/
*
But wait, the diet industry was not done influencing people improperly.* Do you recall when this was in the news?
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A8902-2004Nov23.html
*
So, When we look at research into obesity especially, we must consider research validity.* This is define as such:
Question: What is Validity?
Answer: Validity is the extent to which a test measures what it claims to measure. It is vital for a test to be valid in order for the results to be accurately applied and interpreted. 

Validity isnt determined by a single statistic, but by a body of research that demonstrates the relationship between the test and the behavior it is intended to measure. There are three types of validity: (From About.com, but a standard research definition)
And, we must consider Bias.* Bias is the unknown or unacknowledged error created during the design, measurement, sampling, procedure, or choice of problem studied.** In essence, research design to guarantee the confirmation of a belief, is flawed, biased, and does not provide new knowledge.* There are many ways to achieve bias, and to someone who is not an astute researcher, the signs are not always clear.* It DOES have significant effects, as I pointed out earlier.* 

The second facet of the obesity epidemic is that, people ARE getting fatter (though not as much as everyone says).* Why is this?* The answer comes from a relatively new area of study called epigenomics.* epigenomics put simply is the study of the expression of genes.* All animals have a warchest of genes, 100's, 1000'a, millions more than are being used or "expressed" at any point.* The task of figuring out how genes are expressed has yielded some surprising results.* 
http://discovermagazine.com/2006/nov/cover/?searchterm=methylation
*
In this article, Agouti mice, genetically bred to be overweight, diabetic (among other things), when fed a high antioxidant diet during pregnancy, produce thin, non-diabetic offspring, even though the offspring MUST carry the agouti gene.* Here are the implications:* first these mice are bred to be overweight and diabetic, showing a genetic link, and second, this genetic heritage is overcome NOT be diet and exercise (which is ineffectual in agouti mice), but rather a high antioxidant diet during pregnancy.**
So applying this research to humans is slow, partially because there is not a private industry funnelling billions of dollars into research in this area.* We can make some leaps though.* For example, 
Ms. Gina Kolata has done some research into all of this. Research shows that what happens in the womb has ALOT more power than what you can do right now. Millions of dollars of government money has been spent on intervention programs, changing the diets of whole towns. The result? Well, nothing. Meaning, nothing changed. No matter how they ate, kids and adults were just as fat or thin as ever. If you'd like to know more about that, you can buy and read her book:
http://www.amazon.com/dp/0374103984/?tag=skimlinks_replacement-20
*

I hope you follow all of this so far.* We all still want to do something for obesity right?* well, diet and exercise are fine, and should be encouraged, but will make little difference.* Instead, you and other lawmakers should target interruptions to the methylation cycle, especially during pregnancy.* What interrupts the methylation cycle?* carcinogens and other partially carcinogenic chemicals.* Here are some examples:* Cigarette smoking (tar, PCB's, etc), Mercury (including thimerosal in vaccines), factory air pollution (similar to cigarette smoke), formeldyhyde and other similar chemicals (leech from building materials, esp. fire retardant materials), Aspartame (yes, that's NutraSweet), Saccharin (Sweet and Low), and many many others.* I believe the evidence I have presented shows that any increase in obesity is a result not of the sedentary lifestyle, but our changing chemical world.*


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## Paquito (Jan 25, 2010)

johnnytattoos said:


> Some of us weirdos actually get turned on when called fat. Just sayin.



I'm in that club!


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## chicken legs (Jan 25, 2010)

99Haints said:


> Ew gross, those weirdos should be in a zoo! In the elephant cage...surrounded by peanuts and the laughter of women, where they're constantly forced to..:blush:nevermind.



pleasure themselves?


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## chicken legs (Jan 25, 2010)

squurp said:


> I believe the evidence I have presented shows that any increase in obesity is a result not of the sedentary lifestyle, but our changing chemical world.*




Duuuudee...where were you when I stared the Being fat...is it a choice thread..


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## Geodetic_Effect (Jan 26, 2010)

squurp said:


> The first and largest misconception about obesity in general, is that obesity results simply from an imbalance of calories taken in and calories expended through physical exercise.*




Are those seriously the resources you used to form this opinion? A few sets of twins and some lab mice. If so, you need to go back to the drawing board. I don't have time to list all of the logical fallacies and confirmation bias involved here. The study I referenced, while flawed, was a genetic study on human DNA. It is used just as a piece of evidence in support of a lot of hands on research I have done. Having an opinion, then finding a bunch of random articles that somewhat support that original opinion is not research. I have worked with many obese men and women, almost all of whom have said they have a genetic predisposition to being fat and that they have tried many diets and exercise programs with no results. Not once have I seen it proven to be true. Every single time, as long as they stick with the program they see great results. The fitness portion being especially important. Observing what happens in reality is the best research you can do. You can't do that by reading some unrelated article. Go to any competent personal trainer, preferably a Certified Strength and Conditioning Specialist. They will be able to show you tons of real world examples of how this idea of diet and exercise not being that important to weight loss is completely ridiculous.


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## OhLaLaSoSexy (Jan 26, 2010)

kittencat said:


> there was a guy who wanted to go on a date with me) but he just wanted sex).And when i said im not going to have sex with you please leave me alone he said*well your a fat girl* and i said*yeah and hot enough for you to bother cus you wanted to do me*in which case i laughed.It shouldnt bother you to much(cus your prolly the hawtness).But i get how a stranger saying that can be hurtful*hugs*



This has happened to me before! I will reject a guy or ignore him so he tries to get me back by saying im fat or yadda yadda. 
Its really confusing haha. Its like whaaaaat? werent you just trying to hook up with me? hahah silly males;P


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## 99Haints (Jan 26, 2010)

chicken legs said:


> pleasure themselves?



Yeah, or jump rope shirtless, high speed hula hoop, belly dance, or do aerobics to a chorus of sarcastic cat calls. They'd probably like that. But that's enough...speculating out of me. It's sick freakin' world!


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## stldpn (Jan 26, 2010)

Geodetic_Effect said:


> No alcohol and not meant to be derogatory. Just my thought after reading the original post. If you don't like something about yourself then yes you should try to change it.



This is a hot button issue since, for a lot of reasons weight loss can be more than just physically difficult. I personally do not "suffer" with weight but when my job consisted of consulting with diabetics all day long I came to the realization very quickly that he resolve it takes to "lose weight" or "control blood glucose" is not a matter of making a snap decision to cut down on sugars, carbs and fats and exercise regularly. All too often it involves breaking habits that have existed for twenty years or better. Sadly, even when you have a life threatening physical illness emotions prevent weight loss from being a linear path.

Edit:
On top of that, the medical community is particularly unfit to deal with the issue since most doctors become fixated on the symptoms rather than the causations. We gave out fenfluramine and phentermine to people who already had high blood pressure for years because we wanted to treat obesity as if it were the primary disease in everyone who has it.


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## escapist (Jan 26, 2010)

I gotta say last night I was shopping with Chicken at Walmart and this little girl's eyes just get HUGE and I can already see it coming, "Look mommy, that man is HUGE!" I almost died laughing as the mom tired to run out of the isle not knowing what to say lol. Ohhhh man it was just to cute and funny at the same time. I could tell the mom was worried but didn't have a clue what to say. She bolted so fast I didn't even get a chance to reassure her it was fine. I wanted to play along though and say, "Yes, because I eat lots of little children like you for supper! Muahahahah!" Ahhhh good times good times.

Maybe because I am an AF and an SSBHM it really just doesn't bother me at all. Besides OMG could you imagine if I actually got upset at that kind of thing? Or got violent with people who said nasty things. Hell I would be in prison already. I've broken enough bones of other people by accident I hate to imagine what would happen if I really wanted to hurt people. As a martial artist I no longer have the ability to just blindly hit someone out of rage or anger and not care where the strike lands. For me every movement is a calculated thing. I automatically go for critical strike zones, the temples, radial nerve, collar bone, Jaw, solar plexus, knees, and so on and so forth. When I look at a person when it comes to combat they just look like a human pin-cushion of weak vital points that can cause trauma and lead to death. 

When I was 19 I had just spent 6 hours training on various neck breaking techniques thinking nobody would ever attack me in the way they were using as the basic attack. Later that same night I almost got into a fight where my opponent was doing that exactly thing (a double centered shove). Every time he want to touch me all I could see was my breaking his neck in slow motion. It was as if I had all the time in the world to destroy him. Thats when it really hit me. because thats exactly what I had. Luckily my friends and his friends convinced the other guy to go home (later I found out someone had spotted the fact that my car keys were already poking out between my knuckles ready to impact the soft tissues of his body, face, and neck). After the incident I became acutely aware of my own feelings of aggression, and my own personal need to keep in them check because the possibility of a life being taken was VERY real.

These days nothing is really worth getting that upset over other than the things that should trigger a life or death response.


For the most part I believe martial arts should be fun:





(In the pic, we are all laughing because I'm in a lot of pain, right before they took the pic they put 2 different joint locks on me behind my back.)


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## escapist (Jan 26, 2010)

You know I should add that as that guy was trying to push my buttons he kept calling me "Jelly Belly". I truly felt no emotional reaction about it. I just went into threat analysis mode, realized he was just a redneck wanting to showboat for his friends and I might have to defend myself. I really can't say his name calling made me feel anything.


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## squurp (Jan 26, 2010)

chicken legs said:


> Duuuudee...where were you when I stared the Being fat...is it a choice thread..



I've been around in this community for about ten years. It takes me time to present well thought out, researched posts as such, so I do them when I can. If I feel the points are covered, then I feel I don't necessarily need to add to the convo. I've posted similar posts about 4 times at various places on this board.


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## tonynyc (Jan 26, 2010)

escapist said:


> I gotta say last night I was shopping with Chicken at Walmart and this little girl's eyes just get HUGE and I can already see it coming, "Look mommy, that man is HUGE!" I almost died laughing as the mom tired to run out of the isle not knowing what to say lol. Ohhhh man it was just to cute and funny at the same time. I could tell the mom was worried but didn't have a clue what to say. She bolted so fast I didn't even get a chance to reassure her it was fine. I wanted to play along though and say, "Yes, because I eat lots of little children like you for supper! Muahahahah!" Ahhhh good times good times.
> 
> Maybe because I am an AF and an SSBHM it really just doesn't bother me at all. Besides OMG could you imagine if I actually got upset at that kind of thing? Or got violent with people who said nasty things. Hell I would be in prison already. I've broken enough bones of other people by accident I hate to imagine what would happen if I really wanted to hurt people. As a martial artist I no longer have the ability to just blindly hit someone out of rage or anger and not care where the strike lands. For me every movement is a calculated thing. I automatically go for critical strike zones, the temples, radial nerve, collar bone, Jaw, solar plexus, knees, and so on and so forth. When I look at a person when it comes to combat they just look like a human pin-cushion of weak vital points that can cause trauma and lead to death.
> 
> ...



*E*scapist: 

You bring upon several interesting points with respect to the daily interactions that folks of size often have to deal with. Many times it's a variety of circumstances (where you live-who is making the "comment"- demographics of the SSBHM/SSBBW- how you carry yourself)...

Children can also be a challenge in themselves. They can sometime be very blunt in what they have to say and of course how we respond to such comments can depend on many circumstances & what may or may not work.

Having a calm demeanor is always a good thing - folks should never ever mistake calmness for weakness...


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## squurp (Jan 26, 2010)

Geodetic_Effect said:


> Are those seriously the resources you used to form this opinion? A few sets of twins and some lab mice. If so, you need to go back to the drawing board. I don't have time to list all of the logical fallacies and confirmation bias involved here. The study I referenced, while flawed, was a genetic study on human DNA. It is used just as a piece of evidence in support of a lot of hands on research I have done. Having an opinion, then finding a bunch of random articles that somewhat support that original opinion is not research. I have worked with many obese men and women, almost all of whom have said they have a genetic predisposition to being fat and that they have tried many diets and exercise programs with no results. Not once have I seen it proven to be true. Every single time, as long as they stick with the program they see great results. The fitness portion being especially important. Observing what happens in reality is the best research you can do. You can't do that by reading some unrelated article. Go to any competent personal trainer, preferably a Certified Strength and Conditioning Specialist. They will be able to show you tons of real world examples of how this idea of diet and exercise not being that important to weight loss is completely ridiculous.



Please, I have a master's degree in a research area. I've taken many classes in research, and studied more articles in research than you could imagine. You are right, these are a few key articles. There are others, but I've chosen the most relevant. THey are also articles that do not present bias, or are journalistic articles that present "factual" evidence. While observation IS a form of research and it is often used in the social sciences, it has very limited possibility for application, unless it is measured discretely, compared to a valid control, and is in a very controlled environment (i.e. only a single dependent variable). What you call observation, is simply anecdotal evidence. Anecdotal evidence is important for directing research - or determining what questions to ask, but it is NOT research in this case.

regarding mice and research: it should be noted that almost all genetic and epigenetic research is done on mice first, as most beneficial studies on mice would be unethical on humans. It should be noted that MOST medical advances including nearly every medication on the market, must start with clinical trials on animals, usually mice or rats (sometimes monkeys, pigs or rabbits). 

Furthermore, had you actually read my post with an open mind, you would have seen that I acknowledged that diet and exercise play a role. Even in the agouti mice, when their diet is restricted, they lose weight. However, when presented with the EXACT same diet as mice without this gene, their body types and health are dramatically different. It is exactly this research that offers controls and etc. that cannot be recreated in human subject research. 

Really, you need to buy a textbook which will help you to understand and interpret research.


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## chicken legs (Jan 26, 2010)

LOL....


I had to go OLD SCHOOL on ya with Heavy D's Mr. Big Stuff, and Girls they love me


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## Geodetic_Effect (Jan 27, 2010)

squurp said:


> unless it is measured discretely, compared to a valid control, and is in a very controlled environment (i.e. only a single dependent variable). What you call observation, is simply anecdotal evidence. Anecdotal evidence is important for directing research - or determining what questions to ask, but it is NOT research in this case.
> 
> Furthermore, had you actually read my post with an open mind, you would have seen that I acknowledged that diet and exercise play a role. Even in the agouti mice, when their diet is restricted, they lose weight. However, when presented with the EXACT same diet as mice without this gene, their body types and health are dramatically different. It is exactly this research that offers controls and etc. that cannot be recreated in human subject research.
> 
> Really, you need to buy a textbook which will help you to understand and interpret research.



These kinds of studies are over rated. Having a single dependent variable might look great on a graph but is pretty meaningless in the real world where single variables don't exist. Especially, in the health sciences. For example, Harvard did a large study on diet over a 2 yr period. No single independent variable, just a group of obese people and 4 different diets that utilized calorie restriction over a broad range of macronutrient ratios. Only a change in diet, no exercise involved. In six months, they lost an average of 13 pounds no matter which diet they were on. After two years, they had kept off an average of 9 pounds and lost 1 to 3 inches in the waist. They had improvements in heart-disease risk factors, including increases in HDL cholesterol, and decreases in LDL cholesterol and triglycerides. This isn't a large amount of weight loss, but shows how diet alone can elicit positive change. And this study neglects the synergistic relationship between diet and exercise. There are obviously cases where you need to evaluate singe variables. But with nutrition and fitness it is a waste of time. They do these studies so they can isolate a chemical or gene that they can use in a "magic" weight loss pill to make a huge profit. Even if they are genuinely doing it to help mankind, the easy way always has unforeseen consequences that will not be realized until long after this treatment is invented. I started this research with no preconceptions. I didn't choose a side, I had a question and wanted to find the truth. And I have. All these articles and references you have found are just an attempt to justify the laziness and excuses people use to avoid putting in the effort it takes to make a change. "A man should look for what is, not what he thinks should be."


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## stldpn (Jan 27, 2010)

mjb1968 said:


> I do quite often and it still hurts even when I do not know the person. Am I being too sensitive? Does anyone else feel the same way? How do I get a date after 4 years of not having a date even?



Despite what some people here might say, it is not entirely unreasonable to feel bad when someone intentionally insults you. No one can tell you what's right for you, but I can tell you that potential mates are not impressed by people who are genuinely unhappy with themselves. I suggest you work on you first. There are plenty of people who can love the physical you no matter what you look like. But it's best if your first truly healthy love is you. Cause real love is not about veneers.


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## calauria (Jan 27, 2010)

Hmmmm...I believe that a person who insults me, deserves to be treated badly and commence to do so and I have no guilt or shame in doing so...


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## Ninja Glutton (Jan 27, 2010)

OhLaLaSoSexy said:


> This has happened to me before! I will reject a guy or ignore him so he tries to get me back by saying im fat or yadda yadda.
> Its really confusing haha. Its like whaaaaat? werent you just trying to hook up with me? hahah silly males;P



I hate this stereotype that fat people are somehow instantly "easy." That's a load of bs.

I'm actually quite picky


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## Ninja Glutton (Jan 27, 2010)

stldpn said:


> Despite what some people here might say, it is not entirely unreasonable to feel bad when someone intentionally insults you. No one can tell you what's right for you, but I can tell you that potential mates are not impressed by people who are genuinely unhappy with themselves. I suggest you work on you first. There are plenty of people who can love the physical you no matter what you look like. But it's best if your first truly healthy love is you. Cause real love is not about veneers.



Nail on the head.

Rep for you.


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## GbWestsider (Jan 27, 2010)

No not at all.


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## MaybeX (Jan 27, 2010)

As mentioned above it's not at all unusual to feel a bit hurt when someone says something with the direct_ intention _of hurting your feelings. 

How you deal with it and what your personal philosophy about the subject might be is your own business.


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## squurp (Jan 27, 2010)

Geodetic_Effect said:


> These kinds of studies are over rated. Having a single dependent variable might look great on a graph but is pretty meaningless in the real world where single variables don't exist. Especially, in the health sciences. For example, Harvard did a large study on diet over a 2 yr period. No single independent variable, just a group of obese people and 4 different diets that utilized calorie restriction over a broad range of macronutrient ratios. Only a change in diet, no exercise involved. In six months, they lost an average of 13 pounds no matter which diet they were on. After two years, they had kept off an average of 9 pounds and lost 1 to 3 inches in the waist. They had improvements in heart-disease risk factors, including increases in HDL cholesterol, and decreases in LDL cholesterol and triglycerides. This isn't a large amount of weight loss, but shows how diet alone can elicit positive change. And this study neglects the synergistic relationship between diet and exercise. There are obviously cases where you need to evaluate singe variables. But with nutrition and fitness it is a waste of time. They do these studies so they can isolate a chemical or gene that they can use in a "magic" weight loss pill to make a huge profit. Even if they are genuinely doing it to help mankind, the easy way always has unforeseen consequences that will not be realized until long after this treatment is invented. I started this research with no preconceptions. I didn't choose a side, I had a question and wanted to find the truth. And I have. All these articles and references you have found are just an attempt to justify the laziness and excuses people use to avoid putting in the effort it takes to make a change. "A man should look for what is, not what he thinks should be."



I understand that you undertook your studies (not research) in this area, I feel you mean well, but you simply do not understand how research studies work, nor did you read what I have typed already. Since you don't care to read what I've already typed, and your understanding is limited as such, I don't need to contribute much else. In order for a person to discover a greater understanding, that person must first WANT to reach a greater understanding.


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## Geodetic_Effect (Jan 28, 2010)

squurp said:


> I understand that you undertook your studies (not research) in this area, I feel you mean well, but you simply do not understand how research studies work, nor did you read what I have typed already. Since you don't care to read what I've already typed, and your understanding is limited as such, I don't need to contribute much else. In order for a person to discover a greater understanding, that person must first WANT to reach a greater understanding.



I read every word of everything you posted. You are just confused.


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## chicken legs (Jan 28, 2010)

Just to let you guys know...I know where to get baby oil in bulk and a blow up pool...:eat2:


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## RJI (Jan 28, 2010)

I haven't had the issue with people saying it in front of me because I was quick to defend my honor in my youth with physical violence. I have however had my feelings hurt a few times by people saying stuff to others behind my back, and its not so much that they called me fat but that someone i considered a friend would try to be hurtful.


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## Jackoblangada (Jan 28, 2010)

No, not anymore. For the most part I tend to just make people feel stupid for pointing out something that I have been aware for quite some time, thank you.

Words tend to have only the power you give them. I have chosen not to let the word 'fat' be a bad word. It's an adjective, one that applies to me.

In fact, if spoken in the right way, by the right person, it can be the sexiest word out there. Had a g'f for a bit that had this great Scottish accent. When she would purr in my ear with that accent "You are so damned fat..", any ill will I had to that word melted away quickly in a rather feral and animalistic fit of passion.


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## Geodetic_Effect (Jan 28, 2010)

chicken legs said:


> Just to let you guys know...I know where to get baby oil in bulk and a blow up pool...:eat2:



LOL, funny shit.


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## DreamyInToronto (Jan 28, 2010)

chicken legs said:


> Just to let you guys know...I know where to get baby oil in bulk and a blow up pool...:eat2:




chicken legs, I'll bring the Twister!! xoxox


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## veil (Jan 29, 2010)

MaryElizabethAntoinette said:


> To transfer this to us FFA's... I gotta change the initial question: *Do you ever get upset when people call you sick for finding fat attractive? *
> 
> Because I'm so open about what I like, or rather, because everyone knows what I like... when I meet new people, it's bound to come out that I love fat men (whether I mention it, or not). Half the time I get the confused reaction, as if I'm joking. A quarter of the time I get a reaction of indifference (ya know, the whole, "You like what you like, whatever."), and the remaining quarter of people... are cruel about it.
> I've had people raise their voice at me, call me a sick pervert, and tell me there's something seriously wrong with me. (Lucky me, I'm so comfortable with my reality that their opinions don't change my mind).
> ...



i've just started dating the biggest guy i've ever been with. he's not huge, about 3x and (somewhat unfortunately) losing a few pounds. i haven't gotten any comments yet when we're out and about, but i have seen people looking at us, trying to figure us out, even quietly discussing us and pointing discreetly. too bad for them, i notice stuff like that!

anyway, it hurts me and i worry it hurts him. i react generally by wrapping my arm as best it can go about his waist, stroking his love handles and kissing him on the cheek or the lips

their opinions definitely don't change my mind, but i wish i were less nervous or self conscious. it honestly probably speaks to some latent fatphobia i've still got to accept and deal with. you seem very confident, i admire that!


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## chicken legs (Jan 29, 2010)

DreamyInToronto said:


> chicken legs, I'll bring the Twister!! xoxox



All I have to say to that is...good times...good times..:happy:


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## kittencat (Jan 31, 2010)

LOL i know!they are silly!this is truth


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## escapist (Jan 31, 2010)

DreamyInToronto said:


> chicken legs, I'll bring the Twister!! xoxox



Now, is this a full contact or spectator sport? :blush:


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## Wanderer (Feb 1, 2010)

johnnytattoos said:


> Some of us weirdos actually get turned on when called fat. Just sayin.





free2beme04 said:


> I'm in that club!



Same here!

Honestly, I LIKE being called "fat". True, currently I don't feel big enough to deserve the title... I'm a bit shy of 260, according to the Wii balance board... but I enjoy being fat! When someone calls me fat, it makes me blush, the same as anyone else noticing something I'm proud of.


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## bigrugbybloke (Feb 1, 2010)

i love being called fat and at 24 stone i think i deserve the praise


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## chicken legs (Feb 1, 2010)

I have to be honest,yes it pisses me of when people are like ...wow you gained weight, you were so hot......Usually I respond with ..put your money with your mouth is type comment in regards to getting me a personal trainer and chef. However, I say, put your money with your mouth is, to any comment that is a dig. The thing is, its usually people I know (family)who say stuff like that.


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## extra_fat_guy (Feb 1, 2010)

Ninja Glutton said:


> I hate this stereotype that fat people are somehow instantly "easy." That's a load of bs.
> 
> I'm actually quite picky



Thats what I am doing wrong. I will stop being easy. :doh: lol


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## extra_fat_guy (Feb 2, 2010)

I don't let it bother me anymore. I hear it more from little kids. My 2 year old niece says it a lot. She likes to sit on my belly, and watch cartoons. Maybe my belly is softer than the couch. lol


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## Wanderer (Feb 2, 2010)

bigrugbybloke said:


> i love being called fat and at 24 stone i think i deserve the praise



For those not versed in British measure: That's 336 American pounds.


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## lozonloz (Feb 2, 2010)

BigChaz said:


> Hell no. It doesn't hurt me that they call me fat. I am fat, I know that. Big whoop. It also doesn't hurt me that the person calling me fat is doing so make me feel bad or down about myself. What makes me *mad* is the lack of respect / manners / civility it signifies. On the rare occasions someone calls me fat where I am meant to hear it it, I just grab my belly and look down and go "HOLY SHIT, WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN? Oh well, its better than being ugly!"
> 
> Thats pretty much verbatim what I say every time and they end up looking like the doofus.



Similarly, when someone comments on how fat I am I like to reply with:

"HOLY SHIT! WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN? It must have been the ENTIRE COW I ate yesterday."

I am glad to have found a kindred spirit

More favourites:

"Oh that's not fat, its a series of tumours. I have rampant terminal cancer, it's a wonder I havent dropped dead in front of you yet."

"I swell up during Summer, it's the pollen."

"My identical twin and I merged yesterday and we havent figured out whose internal organs we're going to use yet, so we're keeping them all in here just in case."

"I know! I have this amazing capacity to absorb people through osmosis!" *Reach out towards person with creepy grin and make as if to hug them*

I find that a confusing and crazy response leaves them bewildered and me giggling. I enjoy such encounters, they leave me feeling happy for the rest of the day Especially if I used the last one and they ran away.


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## IszyStone (Feb 3, 2010)

When I was younger, elementary school younger, I was teased a lot. Not only am I a squishy, but I was the "smart, different, antisocial squishy" so I basically closed my self away from the world more. Obviously I was upset. Sometimes I resorted to physical violence because they were jerks. I was a scratcher and a shin kicker. But as I got older I stopped caring. I ended up going to a "better" school because I had my smarts and I was okay with it because I wasn't leaving any friends behind. So every time someone teases me or pokes fun at me now I just wonder how fortunate I will be down the road.

The only time I get really upset though is when it's my male elders. My father and grandfather (mostly grandfather) are always saying, "you'd be so pretty if you lost some weight" or if I'm eating my grandfather would say, "eating again!" even if I hadn't since the last normal meal (breakfast, lunch, dinner) and being that I can't be disrespectful to them I can't say anything, so I just have to take it. Although I'm dieing to say, "you know what I am beautiful now, true I'd fit societies beauty if I was thinner, but that doesn't make me any less beautiful than I am." Another reason I don't way this is because my grandfather is hard-of-hearing so he wouldn't get the message clearly, and he has memory loss so he'd just say it again.

Anyway the point I'm trying to make is that it's okay and normal to get upset, we're social creatures we want acceptance, but you can't let what they say be the rule on which you live your life or base your understanding of yourself.


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## IszyStone (Feb 3, 2010)

Okay really long thoughts swimming through my head. Also I couldn't edit my other post so here:

I also get upset that some people feel the need to dish out what they think are funny insults. It just shows a lack of class and possible insecurity of the insult disher. I think it's dumb how some people find it necessary to feel accomplished by what they think is causing another persons self-confidence to diminish.

Also It's great not to feel upset, if you like who you are and don't care what other people think that's awesome.


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## bigrugbybloke (Feb 3, 2010)

Wanderer said:


> For those not versed in British measure: That's 336 American pounds.



so ok? somwhere between 340 and 350 today:eat1:


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## freakyfred (Feb 4, 2010)

Feels bad man. Actually hasn't been said to me in a while so I dunno how I would react now.


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## siren_ (Feb 10, 2010)

Why should "fat" be an insult. If you are, so what? I use it as a term of endearment. ^_^


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## extra_fat_guy (Feb 11, 2010)

I like to hear it from women I am dating. Its a turn on when a woman rubs my belly, and calls me fat.


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