# What Do You Want, a Medal?!?



## lovelocs (Jun 10, 2011)

Today, I was discussing my job situation with a friend of mine, and we were talking about jobs which made us unhappy, and how it changed us. I started to talk about how much money I spend when I'm unhappy. She agreed, then she stopped, got that look, and asked:

"Mind if I ask you a funny question?"

"Ask me anything," I said.

"Do you think if you were happier you would... 

eat...

less?"


I just looked at her. She had just finished politely noticing that I had had 3 leftover biscuits with jam (*gasp*). She claims to never get hungry, and tends to get sick after she eats. I'm six inches taller than her and a good 100 pounds heavier, and I'm a damn sight healthier, fat and all.

I continued to just look at her. Then I told her:

"No, I actually have a tendency to lose weight when I'm really stressed."

She told me she did, too, we went on to have a pleasant, silly conversation after that. I did not bust her upside the head with a skillet. I think I deserve a medal.


How have you won the medal of patience, tolerance, and non-violence toward clueless folk?


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## crayola box (Jun 11, 2011)

Unfortunately I have not...not in this situation anyway. Perhaps though it's because most often when it happens the other person is asking because they are "concerned" and "want to help" rather than coming from a place of neutrality or curiosity. When this occurs I admit I am guilty of winning the medal for defensiveness, icy stares, and silent withdrawal.


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## lozonloz (Jun 11, 2011)

My best girl has driven me to distraction, and I love her so I grit my teeth and say nothing.

Basically, I was trying to introduce her to the concept of Fat Acceptance and clue her in on some of the issues I have because I'm fat. They haven't been brought up before because she's been a single teenage mum and frankly she's had to deal with so much more prejudice for that, but it came up in conversation so I went with it. Anyway the topic got onto HAES and how I feel that's something I'd like to try harder at.

And the whole conversation is going well and then she says:

"Well of course hun, YOU'RE not like that, but those lazy fat women really should lose some weight. I'm not talking about you, but the OTHER fat women I see, well some of them really could lose some weight if they tried..."

I changed the subject before I bit her head off. I was kinda proud for managing it.


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## Pitch (Jun 13, 2011)

I've not won the medal for fatness as I shoot my mouth off, but I have won it for race. I had to start squaring my shoulders and walking away instead of blasting off every time someone dropped the "n bomb" at me. Even 'jokingly'.

Or I would have lost all my hair by now.


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## littlefairywren (Jun 13, 2011)

Years ago when I was shopping on my own, I foolishly smiled at a random man and was moving on through to get my things when he took the smile as an opening to say very loudly "you know....men don't like to fuck fat women." Now, this was before Dims, and before feeling relatively comfy in this body of mine, which is a whole lot bigger now.

I didn't say boo to him because I didn't like to be rude....crazy hey. Of course if someone said that to me now I'm sure I'd not be so timid, but I am more a lover than a fighter. Besides, what goes around surely comes around.


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## Deacone (Jun 15, 2011)

I think both you and littlefairywren both deserve a medal. I would have smacked my friend around the head if she said that to me. (thankfully all my friends are very fat accepting)  and fairy, I would have called him a c*&t - even if we were in a shopping area. 

Some people are just dicks and need to know that they're being one.


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## Heavy_Cream (Jun 15, 2011)

littlefairywren said:


> Years ago when I was shopping on my own, I foolishly smiled at a random man and was moving on through to get my things when he took the smile as an opening to say very loudly "you know....men don't like to fuck fat women." Now, this was before Dims, and before feeling relatively comfy in this body of mine, which is a whole lot bigger now.
> 
> I didn't say boo to him because I didn't like to be rude....crazy hey. Of course if someone said that to me now I'm sure I'd not be so timid, but I am more a lover than a fighter. Besides, what goes around surely comes around.



My God, that was terrible of him. Wow. I'm so sorry.


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## cherrysprite (Jun 15, 2011)

littlefairywren said:


> Years ago when I was shopping on my own, I foolishly smiled at a random man and was moving on through to get my things when he took the smile as an opening to say very loudly "you know....men don't like to fuck fat women." Now, this was before Dims, and before feeling relatively comfy in this body of mine, which is a whole lot bigger now.
> 
> I didn't say boo to him because I didn't like to be rude....crazy hey. Of course if someone said that to me now I'm sure I'd not be so timid, but I am more a lover than a fighter. Besides, what goes around surely comes around.



Wow, what a jerk. My response, "You know, women don't like to fuck dudes with tiny dicks, so I guess we are both out of luck, huh."


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## Lamia (Jun 15, 2011)

littlefairywren said:


> Years ago when I was shopping on my own, I foolishly smiled at a random man and was moving on through to get my things when he took the smile as an opening to say very loudly "you know....men don't like to fuck fat women." Now, this was before Dims, and before feeling relatively comfy in this body of mine, which is a whole lot bigger now.
> 
> I didn't say boo to him because I didn't like to be rude....crazy hey. Of course if someone said that to me now I'm sure I'd not be so timid, but I am more a lover than a fighter. Besides, what goes around surely comes around.



What a rancid piece of crap. I hope he has a rotting crotch fungus he caught from a skinny 2 dollar whore.


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## LovelyLiz (Jun 15, 2011)

littlefairywren said:


> Years ago when I was shopping on my own, I foolishly smiled at a random man and was moving on through to get my things when he took the smile as an opening to say very loudly "you know....men don't like to fuck fat women." Now, this was before Dims, and before feeling relatively comfy in this body of mine, which is a whole lot bigger now.
> 
> I didn't say boo to him because I didn't like to be rude....crazy hey. Of course if someone said that to me now I'm sure I'd not be so timid, but I am more a lover than a fighter. Besides, what goes around surely comes around.



Geez that guy is an asshole. Sorry you had to be confronted with such idiocy, LFW. It's so hard to know what to do in those situations when you're just blindsided by insults when going about your own business. I usually am just kind of dumbstruck about how someone could say such an ignorant thing, and don't say anything either, but then spend the next several hours creating clever and biting retorts in my mind. 

Though, the fact that he immediately jumped to a sexual type of insult is very telling, eh?


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## Yakatori (Jun 15, 2011)

mcbeth said:


> "_...I usually am just kind of dumbstruck about how someone could say such an ignorant thing, and don't say anything either, but then spend the next several hours creating clever and biting retorts in my mind. .._"


An experience the French have a somewhat vivid idiomatic description for, one of my favorites: L'esprit de l'escalier


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## Lamia (Jun 15, 2011)

mcbeth said:


> Geez that guy is an asshole. Sorry you had to be confronted with such idiocy, LFW. It's so hard to know what to do in those situations when you're just blindsided by insults when going about your own business. I usually am just kind of dumbstruck about how someone could say such an ignorant thing, and don't say anything either, but then spend the next several hours creating clever and biting retorts in my mind.
> 
> Though, the fact that he immediately jumped to a sexual type of insult is very telling, eh?



He was afraid she was trying to get in his pants. I've had similar experiences. I was out one time with my friends having a good time and laughing and I went to the bathroom. When I came out I was still giggling about whatever it was we were laughing about and this guy stopped me and said "What are you so happy about fatty no one is going home with you?" Of course I was very shy back then and was mortified. I am starting to think assholes know who they can give crap to and who they can't.

Poor FA don't have a shot because we've had so many years of shit like this that we're in a defensive position almost all the time. 


I haven't really had anything like that happen in a long time


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## Tania (Jun 15, 2011)

Maybe they were jealous that you have nice, big body parts and they... don't. 

*makes the tiny penis hand signal*

I'm pretty sure that the guys who go out of their way to pick on women's bodies are essentially projecting their own feelings of physical inadequacy on other people.


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## EvilPrincess (Jun 15, 2011)

About 10 years ago I was on a big job search, had tons of interviews and even had one in the same city where my Mother's Father and StepMom lived. Mom's Dad at that time rarely spoke, was almost deaf and had a bad case of dementia. When I went to the house to visit them my Aunt was there and some other people. After I walked in, said hello and a round of hugs, I sat on the couch and we all began talking about the job interview I had just had. Mom's Dad just sat there not saying anything as usual, not really there just watching TV. During a gap in the conversation he turned to me waved his hands in my direction and said "Too FAT, lose weight" That was the first time I had heard his voice in about 10 years and was the last time I ever heard it. 

family puts the fun in dysfunctional


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## Deacone (Jun 16, 2011)

Tania said:


> Maybe they were jealous that you have nice, big body parts and they... don't.
> 
> *makes the tiny penis hand signal*



I lol'ed so hard at that I spat my cereal out on my laptop 

lol:bow:


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## Pitch (Jun 16, 2011)

EvilPrincess said:


> About 10 years ago I was on a big job search, had tons of interviews and even had one in the same city where my Mother's Father and StepMom lived. Mom's Dad at that time rarely spoke, was almost deaf and had a bad case of dementia. When I went to the house to visit them my Aunt was there and some other people. After I walked in, said hello and a round of hugs, I sat on the couch and we all began talking about the job interview I had just had. Mom's Dad just sat there not saying anything as usual, not really there just watching TV. During a gap in the conversation he turned to me waved his hands in my direction and said "Too FAT, lose weight" That was the first time I had heard his voice in about 10 years and was the last time I ever heard it.
> 
> family puts the fun in dysfunctional



That takes the cake for one of the most jacked up things I've ever heard.


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## Tania (Jun 16, 2011)

Deacone said:


> I lol'ed so hard at that I spat my cereal out on my laptop
> 
> lol:bow:



*High five!* 

oh and...

*hands you a towel for lappy!*


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## lovelocs (Jun 19, 2011)

Not snapping on people (especially those who are clueless , 
deliberately inflammatory , or suffering from mental deficiencies ) 
shows class and dignity. 

View attachment JamesDixonMedals.jpg


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## lollipops708 (Jun 21, 2011)

littlefairywren said:


> Years ago when I was shopping on my own, I foolishly smiled at a random man and was moving on through to get my things when he took the smile as an opening to say very loudly "you know....men don't like to fuck fat women." Now, this was before Dims, and before feeling relatively comfy in this body of mine, which is a whole lot bigger now.
> 
> I didn't say boo to him because I didn't like to be rude....crazy hey. Of course if someone said that to me now I'm sure I'd not be so timid, but I am more a lover than a fighter. Besides, what goes around surely comes around.



Holy crap! how could you not have ripped him a new one?

I've been through somthing kind of simillar..(well now that i think of it not really but somthing equally as horrible) When i was 18 My best friendand i (and he had been my bestfriend for 10 years at this point) got really drunk one night and proceeded to have sexual relations, (which was amazing to me because i was head over heels in love with him and had been for the past 4 years) well when morning came swiftly followed by sobriety he looked over to me as we were tangled in the sheets and said " you know.. if you werent so fat I wouldnt have had to have been drunk to do that. If you were to lose weight.. i could date you"

:doh:


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## LovelyLiz (Jun 22, 2011)

lollipops708 said:


> Holy crap! how could you not have ripped him a new one?
> 
> I've been through somthing kind of simillar..(well now that i think of it not really but somthing equally as horrible) When i was 18 My best friendand i (and he had been my bestfriend for 10 years at this point) got really drunk one night and proceeded to have sexual relations, (which was amazing to me because i was head over heels in love with him and had been for the past 4 years) well when morning came swiftly followed by sobriety he looked over to me as we were tangled in the sheets and said " you know.. if you werent so fat I wouldnt have had to have been drunk to do that. If you were to lose weight.. i could date you"
> 
> :doh:



DANG. So, so brutal. I felt the punch in the gut vicariously as I read your story. If you don't mind me asking, how did you respond, and what happened in your friendship?


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## littlefairywren (Jun 22, 2011)

lollipops708 said:


> Holy crap! how could you not have ripped him a new one?
> 
> I've been through somthing kind of simillar..(well now that i think of it not really but somthing equally as horrible) When i was 18 My best friendand i (and he had been my bestfriend for 10 years at this point) got really drunk one night and proceeded to have sexual relations, (which was amazing to me because i was head over heels in love with him and had been for the past 4 years) well when morning came swiftly followed by sobriety he looked over to me as we were tangled in the sheets and said " you know.. if you werent so fat I wouldnt have had to have been drunk to do that. If you were to lose weight.. i could date you"
> 
> :doh:



Wow, thanks for all the words of encouragement ladies. It's surprising how things like this can have such an impact.

*lollipops*...I feel for you so much after reading your post. What an incredible douche bag!


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## luscious_lulu (Jun 24, 2011)

After my boss telling me he didn't think I could do my job (I've been doing it for 11 years), then having him treat me like I was stupid all week, I managed to not tell him to take the job and shove it up his ass.

I also refrained from telling him that I'm probably the smartest person on the team & if I quit he'd be so fucked. 

So I think I deserve a huge gaudy medal. It should be the size of a hub cap.


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## daddyoh70 (Jun 25, 2011)

lovelocs said:


> I just looked at her. She had just finished politely noticing that I had had 3 leftover biscuits with jam (*gasp*). *She claims to never get hungry, and tends to get sick after she eats.* I'm six inches taller than her and a good 100 pounds heavier, and I'm a damn sight healthier, fat and all.
> 
> ...(snipped) I did not bust her upside the head with a skillet. I think I deserve a medal.
> How have you won the medal of patience, tolerance, and non-violence toward clueless folk?



**Disclaimer** I'm not a BBW, but this kind of shit really pisses me off. Not just towards BBW's, but ignorance like this toward any group. I just wanted to show my respect to all of you for what you've had to endure and the way you've all handled yourselves.

lovelocs, perhaps you should have suggested to your friend to research the symptoms of bulimia, and I don't mean in a sarcastic way, or consult a doctor for some possible physical ailment. That just doesn't sound right. To you and all the women here, and everywhere for that matter, who have tolerated such ignorance, I bow to you :bow: 



luscious_lulu said:


> After my boss telling me he didn't think I could do my job (I've been doing it for 11 years), then having him treat me like I was stupid all week, I managed to not tell him to take the job and shove it up his ass.
> 
> I also refrained from telling him that I'm probably the smartest person on the team & if I quit he'd be so fucked.
> 
> So I think I deserve a huge gaudy medal. It should be the size of a hub cap.



Lulu... I couldn't find you a medal, but I did find gaudy and hubcap in the same picture. Perhaps if you run out of tolerance, this could be useful going upside someone's head. I present to you.....


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## lovelocs (Jun 25, 2011)

If that hubcap were silver, I'd order one now. Just sayin'.

Lulu, you do deserve a medal, because I have quit jobs over that ignorance. 

Lolli, you don't deserve a medal. You deserve to go back in time, go upside his head, and then get a dispensation.


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## lollipops708 (Jun 25, 2011)

Wow ladies, thank you for you're support. and after that happened he then told me that he would no longer be my room mate because his new girlrriend ( who looked like a god damn,curly hairer barbie doll and we now know us actually a drug addict) wanted to move to waco. So I pretty much broke down much to my humiliation. i just sat there and cried. He got dressed, and mov3d away 3 days later. A few months later he tried to come crawling back begging for a place to stay and for our friend ship. And over the past 3 years the only time I've seen uim was when my mothetr invited him to my wedding.


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## luscious_lulu (Jun 25, 2011)

daddyoh70 said:


> Lulu... I couldn't find you a medal, but I did find gaudy and hubcap in the same picture. Perhaps if you run out of tolerance, this could be useful going upside someone's head. I present to you.....



:bow:
..................................................................


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## luscious_lulu (Jun 25, 2011)

lovelocs said:


> If that hubcap were silver, I'd order one now. Just sayin'.
> 
> Lulu, you do deserve a medal, because I have quit jobs over that ignorance.
> 
> Lolli, you don't deserve a medal. You deserve to go back in time, go upside his head, and then get a dispensation.



Once I get back from vacation I will be looking for a new job.


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