# Your identity



## Jon Blaze (Jun 27, 2014)

Is being an FA a significant part of your overall identity? Has its significance changed over the years in either direction?


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## Dr. Feelgood (Jun 27, 2014)

Not really. But then I tend to improvise my identity from moment to moment...


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## Dromond (Jun 27, 2014)

I don't identify as an FA. I like what I like, and that's as far as it goes. It's not central to my core being, it's not like gender identity or sexual identity. It's a preference.


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## landshark (Jun 27, 2014)

For me it is a preference. But preferences change. My wife is losing weight, so I am adjusting to that and changing with her. I've come to realize I prefer a certain person more so than a body type. With that said, if I had to start from scratch, (God forbid that day ever comes) I'd probably pursue a BBW or SSBBW . All other factors equal, I still prefer the extra weight.


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## CastingPearls (Jun 27, 2014)

Dromond said:


> I don't identify as an FA. I like what I like, and that's as far as it goes. It's not central to my core being, it's not like gender identity or sexual identity. It's a preference.


I have to agree with this with regard to myself.


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## jakub (Jun 28, 2014)

happily_married said:


> My wife is losing weight, so I am adjusting to that and changing with her. I've come to realize I prefer a certain person more so than a body type.



How it is even possible? I believe preference is hardwired. Do you enjoy your sex like it was before?


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## landshark (Jun 28, 2014)

jakub said:


> How it is even possible? I believe preference is hardwired. Do you enjoy your sex like it was before?



I do. I think preference is hard wired too, but it can change. I've been married for a little over 8 years now. Some things have become more important to me than my wife's physical appearance. Her happiness and confidence in herself is important as well. That she is accomplishing something she has tried but failed to do for years is important. 

Our sex life is as good as ever, too. Without going too deep into details, her self image has improved which...uh..."pays dividends" in our sex lives with each other.


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## Dromond (Jun 28, 2014)

If a change in your partner's appearance can change your feelings about him/her, then it isn't love.


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## KHayes666 (Jun 28, 2014)

Jon Blaze said:


> Is being an FA a significant part of your overall identity? Has its significance changed over the years in either direction?



There once was a time I used to be proud of it. Now I am ashamed of it. Not because of my attraction to females, but because of the behavior of others I've met over the years. Not everyone of course, but the vast majority of men and women I've met either in person or over the internet in the past ten years have made me pretty much keep my opinions to myself.

I'd be here all day explaining but I'll leave with one nugget to think about. I've been to more memorial services/wakes for either former ssbbw models or just plain members of the community than I'd like to. Most of the FA's that these women pretty much gave their lives to entertain weren't even there, they had moved on to someone else to jack off too. Meanwhile I'm sitting there looking at one woman's parents sobbing and saying "It was just so sudden" and feeling a combination of sadness and rage because where the supposed "friends" and "fans" that supported her massive eating intake but not her health? THAT'S what I'm ashamed about, these women are dead and I seem to be one of the few that either still remember or care.


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## jakub (Jun 28, 2014)

Dromond said:


> If a change in your partner's appearance can change your feelings about him/her, then it isn't love.



Love is not sex.


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## Dromond (Jun 28, 2014)

jakub said:


> Love is not sex.



True. Love is far more important.


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## Saisha (Jun 29, 2014)

I'm not sure whether or not to post this in this thread - it is somewhat related to identity - earlier today I was talking with a friend of mine about FA in general - somehow the subject steered towards whether or not part of an attraction of a person of average size prefers someone of larger size due to feeling more secure with them on a physical level, more from the standpoint of an average size male to BBW etc. I'm just wondering others thoughts on this - whether or not it is part of the attraction to some or not?


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## Dromond (Jun 29, 2014)

Saisha said:


> I'm not sure whether or not to post this in this thread - it is somewhat related to identity - earlier today I was talking with a friend of mine about FA in general - somehow the subject steered towards whether or not part of an attraction of a person of average size prefers someone of larger size due to feeling more secure with them on a physical level, more from the standpoint of an average size male to BBW etc. I'm just wondering others thoughts on this - whether or not it is part of the attraction to some or not?



I have an aesthetic attraction to soft and round women. I like the way they look and feel. It doesn't have any deeper meaning than that for me.


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## landshark (Jun 30, 2014)

Dromond said:


> I have an aesthetic attraction to soft and round women. I like the way they look and feel. It doesn't have any deeper meaning than that for me.



Same here. For me it never had anything to do with feeling secure, or anything like that. Other possible "explanations" I heard over the years was that I suffered from low self esteem and that was why I voluntarily partnered myself with BBWs, or that I lacked confidence in myself despite the fact that I had a few girlfriends who would drive a lot of men crazy to look at before I shifted my efforts entirely to BBWs. 

I don't think it was any of that. I just wanted to pursue who I wanted to pursue. Just like any other guy pursuing the kinds of women he wanted to pursue. There literally is no difference save the shape (and size) our preferences take.


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## Saisha (Jun 30, 2014)

Dromond said:


> I have an aesthetic attraction to soft and round women. I like the way they look and feel. It doesn't have any deeper meaning than that for me.





happily_married said:


> Same here. For me it never had anything to do with feeling secure, or anything like that. Other possible "explanations" I heard over the years was that I suffered from low self esteem and that was why I voluntarily partnered myself with BBWs, or that I lacked confidence in myself despite the fact that I had a few girlfriends who would drive a lot of men crazy to look at before I shifted my efforts entirely to BBWs.
> 
> I don't think it was any of that. I just wanted to pursue who I wanted to pursue. Just like any other guy pursuing the kinds of women he wanted to pursue. There literally is no difference save the shape (and size) our preferences take.



Thank you both for the insight.


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## Amaranthine (Jun 30, 2014)

Saisha said:


> Thank you both for the insight.



This might vary a little bit depending on gender. Feeling protected and secure certainly isn't the root of my attraction - but it's a pretty nice perk. I love feeling completely enveloped by someone. The contrast is delightful. 

As for the original question, I guess I get to be the awkward first person that says it does feel like a significant part of my identity. Without being an FFA, I think I'd be completely content having zero (actually physical) sexual contact for the rest of my life - it'd be on a range of making me very uncomfortable, to merely not being appealing enough to bother pursuing.


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## Azrael (Jun 30, 2014)

I am a feeder.
I have had FA inclinations going all the way back to JK/SK.
I was aware that I was attracted to weight gain back in Gr.3
No matter what kink I have, feederism must be a part of it.
No matter how much I may dislike being a feeder (due to limiting factors among other things) it is something that has been wired in there for most of my life.
So yea, I'd say that's pretty much a yes.


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## ed1980 (Jun 30, 2014)

I have an issue with the whole concept of identity. I think that if I am now, it does not mean I am completely, will stay on that note on the future or was ever like that in the past. 

I do like BBW's and SSBBW's, it kind of makes me an FA. But, my current girlfriend is a BBW and I try to support her in her quest to take care of her health. Besides to find sexy as hell a big woman eating with gusto, I feel my duty is to let her know whenever I think she is getting too much, but I don't push her to anything. Perhaps that make me an anti-FA, I don't know.

What I do know is that it is the commitments we do in our life that define identity. To me, being a huge fan of fat women, does not identify me a fat admirer, I prefer to think of myself as a connoisseur of female beauty. In fact, a very kinky one .....


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## bigmac (Jun 30, 2014)

Dromond said:


> If a change in your partner's appearance can change your feelings about him/her, then it isn't love.



This is mostly true but our more base instincts can never be fully controlled.


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## landshark (Jul 1, 2014)

bigmac said:


> This is mostly true but our more base instincts can never be fully controlled.



Nor do they have to control us. Consider this: You meet the perfect woman who is everything you wish her to be both physically, spiritually, mentally, etc. Then tragedy strikes. Let's say after a few years she is stricken with breast cancer and loses a breast. How do you deal with that? It's ingrained in me to like boobs. I can't help it. I can't force myself not to like them. But what if this were to happen to my wife? 

Love can overcome instinct. I believe it whole heartedly. And while I hope nobody here ever has to experience my hypothetical scenario, it is with some sadness I acknowledge thousands do every year. And many face even worse circumstances. Sometimes it's too much for the healthy partner to bear. Some of them simply cannot adjust to the changes. But many are able to.

No, we can't ever fully control our instincts, but we are little more than animals if we let our instincts fully control us.


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## Dromond (Jul 1, 2014)

happily_married said:


> Nor do they have to control us. Consider this: You meet the perfect woman who is everything you wish her to be both physically, spiritually, mentally, etc. Then tragedy strikes. Let's say after a few years she is stricken with breast cancer and loses a breast. How do you deal with that? It's ingrained in me to like boobs. I can't help it. I can't force myself not to like them. But what if this were to happen to my wife?
> 
> Love can overcome instinct. I believe it whole heartedly. And while I hope nobody here ever has to experience my hypothetical scenario, it is with some sadness I acknowledge thousands do every year. And many face even worse circumstances. Sometimes it's too much for the healthy partner to bear. Some of them simply cannot adjust to the changes. But many are able to.
> 
> No, we can't ever fully control our instincts, but we are little more than animals if we let our instincts fully control us.



I could not have said it better. I agree 100%.


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## phelan4022 (Jul 1, 2014)

KHayes666 said:


> There once was a time I used to be proud of it. Now I am ashamed of it. Not because of my attraction to females, but because of the behavior of others I've met over the years. Not everyone of course, but the vast majority of men and women I've met either in person or over the internet in the past ten years have made me pretty much keep my opinions to myself.
> 
> I'd be here all day explaining but I'll leave with one nugget to think about. I've been to more memorial services/wakes for either former ssbbw models or just plain members of the community than I'd like to. Most of the FA's that these women pretty much gave their lives to entertain weren't even there, they had moved on to someone else to jack off too. Meanwhile I'm sitting there looking at one woman's parents sobbing and saying "It was just so sudden" and feeling a combination of sadness and rage because where the supposed "friends" and "fans" that supported her massive eating intake but not her health? THAT'S what I'm ashamed about, these women are dead and I seem to be one of the few that either still remember or care.



I am with you here. The last woman I attempted to have a relationship with was a model and a feedee whose weight was literally threatening her life. When it came down to brass tacks, her health dominated my thinking, not my attraction to her. She... dealt with her own problems however, and was not serious about taking the steps necessary to save her life. I could not deal with that so I left her. I could not countenance knowing that my attraction might contribute to her death nor that I could not take action to help her. I am a feeder but I have strong moral opinions on it. For instance, see this link to an article I wrote about Susan Emman.

http://admirer4022.deviantart.com/art/Taking-A-Stand-398630382

As for my attraction being an aspect of my identity, I would say yes. It is not simply a preference, I have never been sexually attracted to a thin woman. It is not my sole attraction, intellectualism, artistry, spirituality and a number of other things play a role but I never reach those aspects without the first initial attraction aspect of curvaceousness. It isn't black and white, there isn't a specific size threshold where BAM, I am all of a sudden attracted to them. The entire range of female curvaceousness is attractive to me but I do most prefer what I guess you could call "mid-size" BBWs. Regardless, my partner's health, well being and self-esteem are of utmost importance to me. Yes, even if those things required them to lose weight to a level of thinness I might not find attractive. I guess it may be different for me, I willingly chose to be celibate for five years but sex, while wonderful, is just not a deal breaker for me.


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## bmann0413 (Jul 2, 2014)

Dromond said:


> I don't identify as an FA. I like what I like, and that's as far as it goes. It's not central to my core being, it's not like gender identity or sexual identity. It's a preference.



Ding ding ding ding. He basically summed it up in one nice, four-sentence paragraph. :bow:


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## GordoNegro (Jul 2, 2014)

When I first came to the Dimensions Weight Board, (the original one) I was an FA with feeder tendencies. After meeting others with the passage of time, I was strictly feeder with closeted mutual gaining/feedee tendencies. Evolving over time once more I was a mutual gainer. Presently, I'm in transition to where it appears I'm going back to *strictly feeder/FA* as a majority of the ultra and ssbbw appear to desire chisled abs/hard body types.
This may just be a phase as I went this route before only to give in, but sensing things may be different this time around.

On another note, I personally have no guilt as far as Feeder/FA is concerned as I've only done so with consent, (also as a muual gainer)knowing the full risks and changes, finances involved when adjusting to lifestyle changes in R/T. Though more than understandable for those who have regret or wish otherwise.
I don't think parents or family who lost loved ones whose bodies gave in to the added toll and strain of obesity would care much for sympathies from admirers whose cash-paying "perversions", helped bring that about in the first place. Then again with consenting adults, we all know of the risks and rewards of falling so deeply to that level.


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## Tad (Jul 2, 2014)

Im not so sure whether specifically being an FA is part of my identity, although Im more inclined to say no as I really dont think of that part too often. However I would say that more broadly my feelings around fat are part of my identity. Ive had warm fuzzies toward all things fat from as far back as I can remember, and this was one of the first things I can recall realizing that I differed from other people about (there is something off with the grammar of that sentence, but my brain is too summer-fried right now to try and re-phrase it).

I guess that is really two things. Liking fat is sort of a passive background thing, but it certainly is part of me and how I relate to the world. Knowing that I differ from most others in this regard, because I realized it so young, sort of became the difference that later on I attached to and understood through other differences, emotionally speaking. 

So in that regard it is very much part of my identity, because it is wound through the core of my understanding of who I am and how I differ from other people. There are a lot of more important differences that have been added to that understanding later on, but that first identified difference feels like a part of all the rest. I dont know if that makes any sensethe whole summer-fried brain bit probably isnt helping me articulate this, but it is also hard because it is very much something that I normally just feel, not something that I normally put words around (a lot of my most important thinking is largely non-verbal, and some days it is easier than others to try and translate these thoughts into words)


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## choudhury (Jul 2, 2014)

My answer is "no," because I'm eccentric: I tend to reject the whole assumption that sex is central to identity. I lay this pervasive cultural assumption (which was unknown before the sex-obsessed 20th century) at the feet of Freud, who played a key role in "psychologizing" our condition and making us think, not just that our lives are heavily shaped by subconscious forces, but also that those forces are themselves shaped by sexual drives. Where Freud advocated repression of a lot of our drives, the 1960s saw a semi-consensus around the reverse idea - we should liberate ourselves sexually, and this would liberate us as human beings because sex is constitutive of identity. Ya-hoo. The result is the parade of fetishists we see on talk shows droning on about how they love clowns, or are furries, or are asexual and proud, blah blah blah.

Now obviously sex is a big human drive, as it is for all animals. But so is eating and drinking. I personally don't see why my sexual preference has to be taken as any more "definitive of who I am" than, say, my tastes in food. (Not talking about moral positions like vegetarianism here - by "tastes" I mean just that). Nobody goes around saying that they love salty food and that that "defines their identity." That would strike us as fairly asinine.

My personal ideal situation, then, would be one is which people find partners they both love and are attracted to and move on, without society making a whole huge deal out of the body type of their partner one way or another: either because we come to agree that sex is an appetite like any other, and therefore not really worth elevating to the status of Most Important Thing in Life, or because we go in the other direction and revert back to older models of discretion about private stuff. 

All that being said, OBVIOUSLY our intimate partners help to make us who we are. But their particular body type is only a small (if necessary) part of that much bigger relationship.


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## Forgotten_Futures (Jul 4, 2014)

I identify as an FA in only the weakest sense - I *admire* fat(ness), but it is not a core part of my identity, as I am not at all exclusive in this, nor is it by any length a guarantee. While I have a marked preference for softer women, this does not mean I am not attracted to women who are not particularly soft (really, my only criterion in this regard is "don't look emaciated" and "not so soft as to border on formlessness"). For example, as I work in retail: There are several coworkers - and regular customers - of various sizes and shapes in my store whom I am attracted to; some purely physical, others more metaphysical, a few a blend of both. Literally the only distinguishing factor common to all of them is that they have fairly small breasts. And at least one of them's a lesbian (which is blatantly pointless for me, as I am not female) = P

Ultimately, I value the person (I'm going to say "wearing" for lack of a better term) - or not wearing - the fat much more than the fat itself.

So, yes, an overcomplicated approach to Dromond's first reply = P


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## loopytheone (Jul 5, 2014)

choudhury said:


> The result is the parade of fetishists we see on talk shows droning on about how they love clowns, or are furries, or are asexual and proud, blah blah blah.



Not sure it is right to class being asexual as a fetish. It is a lack of sexual attraction, no different to being bisexual or heterosexual or homosexual. For many years I identified as asexual and was never sexually attracted to anyone or anything until I was 23 years old. It is still extremely rare for me to find a person attractive and I would be more than happy in a relationship without sex so consider myself a grey-asexual.

Anyway, back on topic. I do feel that being a FFA is a part of my identity, yes. It is a preference that I have had ever since I was a child and throughout my life it has influenced my actions and my thoughts to some pretty high degrees. I don't think a single day has gone by since I was a little kid when I haven't daydreamed about the adventures or life of an overweight story/video games/own character. And I draw bigger women and men pretty much every time I sit down to draw, which is quite a lot.


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## Jon Blaze (Jul 6, 2014)

Forgotten_Futures said:


> I identify as an FA in only the weakest sense - I *admire* fat(ness), but it is not a core part of my identity, as I am not at all exclusive in this, nor is it by any length a guarantee. While I have a marked preference for softer women, this does not mean I am not attracted to women who are not particularly soft (really, my only criterion in this regard is "don't look emaciated" and "not so soft as to border on formlessness"). For example, as I work in retail: There are several coworkers - and regular customers - of various sizes and shapes in my store whom I am attracted to; some purely physical, others more metaphysical, a few a blend of both. Literally the only distinguishing factor common to all of them is that they have fairly small breasts. And at least one of them's a lesbian (which is blatantly pointless for me, as I am not female) = P
> 
> Ultimately, I value the person (I'm going to say "wearing" for lack of a better term) - or not wearing - the fat much more than the fat itself.
> 
> So, yes, an overcomplicated approach to Dromond's first reply = P



As far as pure attraction goes, this is similar to my viewpoint (with an addition of the importance of shape). But finding this community led me to meeting a lot of people, learning concepts, and adding a new piece to my acceptance model. The preference in and of itself isn't really part of my identity, but the sum of the parts (acceptance, admiration, support) is. The curiosity hit me at a time where I was experimenting with a lot of things and develop my persona. I develop my eclectic interests during that time, and I do consider it important. 

I'm glad many of you thought this thread was interesting.


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## LillyBBBW (Jul 6, 2014)

loopytheone said:


> Not sure it is right to class being asexual as a fetish. It is a lack of sexual attraction, no different to being bisexual or heterosexual or homosexual. For many years I identified as asexual and was never sexually attracted to anyone or anything until I was 23 years old. It is still extremely rare for me to find a person attractive and I would be more than happy in a relationship without sex so consider myself a *grey-asexual*.
> 
> Anyway, back on topic. I do feel that being a FFA is a part of my identity, yes. It is a preference that I have had ever since I was a child and throughout my life it has influenced my actions and my thoughts to some pretty high degrees. I don't think a single day has gone by since I was a little kid when I haven't daydreamed about the adventures or life of an overweight story/video games/own character. And I draw bigger women and men pretty much every time I sit down to draw, which is quite a lot.



OMG, I like that word. "I'm a graysexual. I only want you for your mind."






In answer to the question, I don't identify as anything. I'm so many things, just as most people are, that it would be difficult to do. I have strong tendencies in some areas but it's not all I've got. Nevertheless I tread carefully when it comes to the parts of me that are a little unorthodox or unusual. I hate the idea of beginning a relationship with someone only to have someone go, "Whoah. When exactly were you going to tell me about this about you?" It is really easy to be nonchalant about certain preferences and go skipping along through the daffodils only to realize you completely forgot about this aspect of yourself that you should have mentioned months earlier. Even the strongest preferences aren't usually an identifier for most people but I try to keep aware that for some it may be a deal breaker.


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## CurvaceousBBWLover (Jul 6, 2014)

While I am strongly attracted to fat women, the attraction is only one facet of my personality. It would be naïve and stupid to hinge my attraction to a woman soley upon her looks. As people get older their looks change. Some women lose/gain weight because of pregnancy, emotional eating, diets or disease. If a woman has cancer, she might have to have certain parts removed in order to stop the disease from attacking her body. What really counts is if I like the person inside, so being attracted to fat women is not that big of a deal.


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## CurvaceousBBWLover (Jul 6, 2014)

Dromond said:


> If a change in your partner's appearance can change your feelings about him/her, then it isn't love.



You must spread some reputation around before giving it to Dromond again. 

Can somebody rep him, please?


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## penguin (Jul 6, 2014)

I don't really identify as an FA. I identify as pansexual, because it doesn't matter to me what is or isn't in a person's pants, or what was or what might/will be. I'm attracted to the person and their personality, their intellect, their wit. Their body is a delightful package that comes with them. I've found people attractive all over the spectrum, thin, fat, short, tall, hairy, hairless...I do have a stronger preference for men over women, but it's not the deciding factor. Just like their weight isn't the deciding factor. I will love their body because it's _their_ body, not because it's a certain size or shape. If their weight goes up or down, I'll still enjoy and appreciate it. Finding someone physically attractive is important, but it's more important for me to have the intellectual and emotional attraction with them first. I will find a man's fat body as appealing as any other if he's got me fired up upstairs first. I will love his body because it's his.

I can find someone attractive without being attracted to them, and I've found people attractive all over the spectrum. If they're not engaging my mind, they won't be engaging anything else.


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## Tad (Jul 7, 2014)

Just to say that, for me at least, saying that being an FA is part of my identity does not equal saying that I could only be involved with someone who is fat. 

It is part of my identity because I notice fat, I think about fat, and a lot of other things feel to me 'kind of like liking fat feels.' But that doesn't mean that I controls me or over rules all other factors.


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## phelan4022 (Jul 8, 2014)

Tad said:


> Just to say that, for me at least, saying that being an FA is part of my identity does not equal saying that I could only be involved with someone who is fat.
> 
> It is part of my identity because I notice fat, I think about fat, and a lot of other things feel to me 'kind of like liking fat feels.' But that doesn't mean that I controls me or over rules all other factors.



Likewise, to say that being an FA is part of my identity does not equal me being only involved with someone who is fat as well. I do not believe that anything so complex as human sexuality can be so narrowly defined.


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## lille (Jul 8, 2014)

Being an FFA is a very small part of my identity, yeah I'm attracted to fat guys and have had a thing for fat since as far back as I can remember, but I have other parts of my identity that for me, at this point in my life anyway, are more salient.


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## bayone (Jul 8, 2014)

I've been following this thread, trying to decide what qualifies as "identity;" but I'd say being even if it's not something I discuss much outside this forum (up until the time I got married, I think most of my friends just assumed I was asexual); being a female FFA is indeed part of my identity, along with all the other weird bits of my personality, whether positive or negative.


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## Tad (Jul 9, 2014)

bayone said:


> ](up until the time I got married, I think most of my friends just assumed I was asexual)[/SIZE];



By the time I started dating my wife, some of my friends were beginning to conclude I must be gay but was in the closet about it. Just because you don't run after everything with complimentary genitalia, people come to odd conclusions.


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## bayone (Jul 9, 2014)

Tad said:


> Just because you don't run after everything with complimentary genitalia,



I get what you're saying, but now I'm picturing "complimentary genitalia" as the world's worst sales incentive: "Buy three pairs of underwear, and receive complimentary genitalia!"


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## Laina (Jul 9, 2014)

bayone said:


> I get what you're saying, but now I'm picturing "complimentary genitalia" as the world's worst sales incentive: "Buy three pairs of underwear, and receive complimentary genitalia!"



That's a brilliant marketing ploy. Especially if they give you the opposite of what you've been carrying around all your life. You'll need to invest in a whole new undergarment wardrobe for your additional bits!


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## bayone (Jul 9, 2014)

Laina said:


> That's a brilliant marketing ploy. Especially if they give you the opposite of what you've been carrying around all your life. You'll need to invest in a whole new undergarment wardrobe for your additional bits!



Well there's no point in giving you one you've already got. Or perhaps they could let you choose from a selection. Collect 'em all!


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## LillyBBBW (Jul 10, 2014)

bayone said:


> Well there's no point in giving you one you've already got. Or perhaps they could let you choose from a selection. Collect 'em all!



I imagined looking down at my privates and having them say, "My you look lovely today. Your foundation is blended to perfection." Who wouldn't want that?


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## Saisha (Jul 10, 2014)

LillyBBBW said:


> I imagined looking down at my privates and having them say, "My you look lovely today. Your foundation is blended to perfection." Who wouldn't want that?



LMAO!!!!!!!!!! :bow::bow:


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## Blockierer (Nov 1, 2014)

Jon Blaze said:


> Is being an FA a significant part of your overall identity? Has its significance changed over the years in either direction?


I live the lifestyle of an FA: I'm married to a SSBBW, I have fat friends, I'm part of the online fat community, I'm open about my FAness. So I must confess, I identify as an FA and I think it's ok.


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## fuelingfire (Nov 1, 2014)

I am surprised by how many people said being an FA isnt a significant part of their identity. It is for me. I think most people I know wouldnt say thats the defining thing about me, I only tell people if specifically asked. Usually its only BBWs that ask anyways. So being an FA wont be written on my tomb stone.
But being one since around the age of 5, it is deeply a part of me. I grew up with a strong duality in seeing I am attracted to something society disapproves of. Though I am not gay, I feel I have a full understanding of what it is like to be in the closet. I have an intense dislike of bullies and people who make fun of others, especially if it is because of how they look/gender/race.. I early on understood that following what a crowd believe/likes is trivial. I might have still had these values if I wasnt a FA but they would not be as strong.
I would argue I would be a different person if I wasnt an FA. I spent about ten years of my life thinking I was the only FA in the world and was ashamed of it (5 through about 15). I wanted to be normal, and like the regular sized models. The internet made me realize I wasnt alone. It wasnt until I got away from high school that I felt comfortable enough to date who I wanted to. I would never want to change even if there was a pray the FA away solution.. I flat out know I would be a different person all together if I wasnt a FA.


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## mediaboy (Nov 1, 2014)

With regard to the originally question:

Some times at work I double up with other utility workers (think two dudes in two bucket trucks) and I'm often in a situation where I am introducintroducing myself to the other guy when he loudly exclaims, "oh shit, are you THAT MEDIABOY, THE ONE THAT LIKES FAT CHICKS?"


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## wrenchboy (Nov 3, 2014)

Yes I do consider being an fa is part of my identity. But only one part. I am a truck driver, a lover of hard rock music and a devoted husband and father. These things are what makes me ME.


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