# **WARNING: GRAPHIC**Feeding Fantasies: IMPORTANT Questions to other feeders



## AnonymousFeeder (Nov 30, 2007)

Hi there,

I'm not new to this board, but I decided to register so I can post some things. I am a PROUD FA. All my friends know I prefer BBWs, and I love showing them off a young beautiful big girl. What my friends do not know is that I also LOVE SSBBWs. I prefer girls 600lbs and up. Moreover, they definitely do not know that I have fantasies about being a feeder. 

I have feeder fantasies that most people would find sick. Thats why I'm posting under the handle "anonymousfeeder." I saw the video about ARealFG and her husband, and while what he did was wrong and disgusting by most standards, I will admit that he got to live out my fantasy. 

Before I outline my fantasies here, I want you all to know that these are strictly fantasies and that I would NEVER actually live them out because I do not want to endanger the health of any woman. 

I LOVE IMMOBILE GIRLS- 
I know I'm not alone in this fantasy. I think nothing is sexier when a girl is so overweight and obese that she is unable to get out of bed. The fatter the better. I fantasize about having a 1000+lb feedee all the time. Too fat to have sex with so I just fuck her rolls. Her breasts would be so large that even though she is young, they sag low like cow udders. She would have hips and an ass so huge that they spread out over her bed, and her MASSIVE belly would hang low over her thighs.

BAD HEALTH IS A TURN ON TOO-
I love fantasizing about having an immobile feedee that is unhealthy due to her morbid obesity. I love the thought of walking into her room and seeing her with oxygen tubes up her nose as she breathes heavily. I just imagine having a Dr. come over and tell me that her blood sugar, blood pressure, and cholesterol are through the roof. I even fantasize about a young girl who is so morbidly obese that she has a heart attack at a young age and has to be forklifted out of the house. The thought of feeding a young super obese girl to death is admittedly a turn on. In my fantasy, if she survives, I still continue to feed her even though she just had a heart attack because I don't care about her health.

FORCE FEEDING-
In my fantasy, my feedee is not allowed to eat vegetables or anything healthy. I funnel feed her stuff like melted butter, bacon grease, melted lard, or heavy cream all the time. I don't care if she starts to cry. I fantasize about having a feeding machine that force feeds her all day long.

PERSONAL HYGIENE-
For fantasy purposes, my feeder has poor personal hygiene. Since she is immobile, she is unable to get out of bed to go to the bathroom. I rarely bathe her because I enjoy having a fat smelly immobile girl. She has to relieve herself in bed like a gross pig. 

I really just needed to get this stuff off my chest. I would like to know what other feeders or anyone else out there thinks. Do any other feeders have the same fantasies? Do you think I'm a sicko? 

In conclusion, I just want to remind you all that these are just my fantasies and I would never live them out. Thank you.


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## AnnMarie (Nov 30, 2007)

*from Moderator*

Just a reminder to people responding to this to follow the board rules. 

You can answer his questions, share opinions, but you are NOT to jump all over him, name call, or be generally negative and snarky. Posts breaking the rules will be edited or removed.

Thank you.


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## Ivy (Nov 30, 2007)

I think that a lot of other feeders have the same fantasies. I've talked to hundreds of feeders throughout 5 years I lurked in this community and the past 4 in which I have been active. You acknowledge that for you this is something that you just want to be a fantasy, there are guys who don't feel this way, or at least think that they don't. As long as it is all fantasy, I think that you are fine. Sexual fantasy is healthy. A lot of people have sexual fantasies that would be considered "sick" or "unhealthy" if they were to act on them for real. (I'm not talking about role playing, which is totally healthy and fine.) You're no more sick than the girl who masturbates to a rape fantasy.. which isn't sick at all. It's just that your fantasy is less common.


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## Gspoon (Nov 30, 2007)

Hrm, I kinda consider myself a feeder. I love a gaining girl myself. I do know some guys who are like yourself AF, and I can understand how you feel and I appreciate it that you keep it as a fantasy. Thats good that you do that.

My feeding fantasy goes along like a eating set  Even if she doesn't gain, I just like the thought that the feedee is happy eating and comfortable with gaining weight. Confidence is my biggest turn on...


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## Emma (Nov 30, 2007)

You've got an extreme case of the feederisms there  

But seriously there are all different types of feeders, some who get off on simple little things and then people like you who are really into the extremes. I know a guy who feels exactly like you and if it wasn't for your local I would reckon you were him! 

I don't think you're a bad person for what you get turned on by, because you really really can't help it. If it doesn't harm anyone then it's fine, once you've *ahemed* its over and done with, I bet the reality of living with a woman like that would bore you stupid. heh


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## RedVelvet (Nov 30, 2007)

I'm stuck here.

I can't be too negative even tho its what I feel.

Can't share my full and true opinion because it would be as extreme as the fantasy you posted.

Can't say much of anything, really, but I am glad you made it clear that its fantasy.

Your fantasies (especially under the "poor health" paragraph) make my most HARDCORE , truly sadistic Dominant friends in the BDSM scene seem like women worshiping cuddlepups. Of course, they do act theirs out with a consenting partner and take care to not permanently damage them...... This is just what lives in your head.

This.......is what is in your head.


Your post made me feel like crying. 










It almost seems like you are getting pleasure in the act of posting this itself. Is this possible?


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## Seth Warren (Nov 30, 2007)

RedVelvet said:


> It almost seems like you are getting pleasure in the act of posting this itself. Is this possible?




Have you ever done or said anything just to see what another person's reaction would be? I'm currently meditating on that question.


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## RedVelvet (Nov 30, 2007)

Seth Warren said:


> Have you ever done or said anything just to see what another person's reaction would be? I'm currently meditating on that question.




Sounds like the definition of troll ...or exhibitionist.


( I am NOT accusing the original poster of being either, myself)


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## Ruby Ripples (Nov 30, 2007)

There are VERY extreme stories here on the forums, that are read and enjoyed so clearly there are others who are turned on by similar. Fantasty can be anything you want it to be, and as you say, you would never want to carry it out. But I must say what concerns me is the fact that in these fantasies you are enjoying maltreating the woman, forcing her to dirty herself in bed, I take it against her will, but she has no choice, and you seem to be turned on by actually doing things that distress her and are cruel to her. That goes way beyond mutual feeder/feedee stuff, even if in fantasy. I don't honestly know how normal that is, do men commonly have fantasies where they are cruel to the other person/people, to their distress? I have to agree with Red Velvet above, in that with your very in depth descriptions, it would appear you were actually getting off just writing the post. 

I am interested to know why your friends don't know you like ssbbws? I can understand you keeping the feeder thing to yourself, just as they might keep their own sexual turn ons to themselves.


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## Tad (Nov 30, 2007)

1) I'm glad that you are clear in your mind about what you fantasize about, versus what you want in reality. This is really important. (for anyone, but especially with fantasies as extreme as yours)

2) The follow on question though, is what are you going to want in real life? Do you need a touch of those fantasies? Or can you go a very different way? Can you keep those fantasies walled away, and not let them affect how you interact with a partner?


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## RedVelvet (Nov 30, 2007)

Ruby Ripples said:


> But I must say what concerns me is the fact that in these fantasies you are enjoying maltreating the woman, forcing her to dirty herself in bed, I take it against her will, but she has no choice, and you seem to be turned on by actually doing things that distress her and are cruel to her. That goes way beyond mutual feeder/feedee stuff, even if in fantasy. I don't honestly know how normal that is, do men commonly have fantasies where they are cruel to the other person/people, to their distress?
> 
> I have to agree with Red Velvet above, in that with your very in depth descriptions, it would appear you were actually getting off just writing the post.




Thank you for saying this in a calm way I never could,and just what I was thinking. I had to go for a walk before I responded.


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## RedVelvet (Nov 30, 2007)

edx said:


> Can you keep those fantasies walled away, and not let them affect how you interact with a partner?




I'm rather curious about that myself.


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## imfree (Nov 30, 2007)

I've had similar, though much milder fantasies in the past. I've seen some most beautiful SSBBWS suffer the consequences of extreme morbid obesity. I am severely diabetic, on oxygen, have cellulitis, and weigh over 430 lbs, myself. I
have very limited mobility and now know what these fantasies feel like from the inside. I could not even imagine what it would feel like to be a woman who weighs over, say 600 lbs. I do not even find feederism at all attractive any more. I would still find a smaller woman who was willing to gain for me, slowly and within limits, however, to be very sexy.


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## activistfatgirl (Nov 30, 2007)

One of the reasons why I'm so glad AnnMarie posted first is that I think it's EXTREMELY dangerous when people fantasize about things that are generally believed to be distasteful and further, dangerous or destructive and they're reacted to in a way that represses any discussion of said fantasy. I think this creates an environment where the person fantasizing never gets to truly question the root of the fantasy, and what the implications are--both negative and positive.

Do I think you're a sicko? Do you think you're a sicko? These are the kind of fantasies that I believe require an incredible amount of soul searching. What is the root? Why do you see the extreme picture? Would you really ever want to hurt someone (you say you don't, but the question still stands). 

I don't believe what RV says (eep!) that these fantasizes make BDSM look tame. Okay, that's true in the sense of common or well-known trends of fantasies. But I honestly believe that *A LOT* of people fantasize about things that if written out like this would make many of us cry. 

I know that I could write that post, and make some of my sisters cry. And I might too! And I should point out, that had I read this post at the right time, I would have cried! I think that's a healthy reaction, especially when being fat embodied can mean this fantasy = our very _worst_ nightmare. 

Anyways, my real reason for posting is that I think the answer to question lies in communication with people that at least understand the base of fat fantasy. Here is a good spot, welcome. However, anonymous posting combined with real concerns (real because this happens OVER and OVER again) that posts like this are made by trolls, makes this kind of authentic dialogue difficult. Combined that with the fact, as already mentioned, that this fantasy is equivalent to saying you enjoy torturing our people, can make this discussion rocky. But I think it can happen.


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## LJ Rock (Nov 30, 2007)

Ivy said:


> ...It's just that your fantasy is less common.



...or less commonly talked about in open forums of discussion.


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## Buffetbelly (Nov 30, 2007)

I confess to having had similar fantasies. However, not only did I not act on them, but I am happy to report that I am 100% cured of these fantasies.

How did it happen? My ex-wife had surgery on her leg and was not allowed to bear weight for 3 months. For 3 months I had to do everything for her and empty her commode. It was not fun in the least, even though she did inevitably gain weight from the forced inactivity. Her horrible disposition was not even the biggest downer of it.

So anytime I might start to revisit the immobility fantasy, the memory of 3 months of pure hell comes back.

Obviously, I don't recommend being a caretaker for an immobile person to cure yourself of this fantasy. But you could try volunteering in a nursing home for a few afternoons. I will bet the experience of helping care for immobile foks will cure you right out of that fantasy!


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## LJ Rock (Nov 30, 2007)

I once had a very wise person say to me (and I am sure I have shared this quote here once or twice before... ) "You can think about anything that you want, but it's what you actually _do_ that counts." Profound on many levels, I feel this quote applies to areas of balance between sexual fantasy and reality. 

However, one must ask, with fantasies as graphic as these isn't it only a matter of time before fantasy starts spilling over into reality? 

I am not casting judgment. I can appreciate and even identify with a lot of what you said.... The extremism of it all can be very alluring, though I can't say I'm particularly fond of the graphic descriptions in regards to bodily functions and the overall degrading and sadistic tone. I think even my most extreme fantasies I have had have been more along the cartoony-fun side of things (think classics like _Pigs is Pigs_ or _Chow Hound_.) Even so, I think the advice given by Activist above is on point: we all gotta do some serious _soul searching_ and figure out what is at the root of our thoughts, fantasies and behaviors in order to really keep things in check. At the end of it all, we may never fully understand what makes some of us FAs or FFAs or feeders... or even what makes us fat. But at least the act of analyzing, identifying and taking responsibility for our feelings and fantasies could possibly make the difference between having an active and healthy sexual-fantasy, and having an out of control compulsion.


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## Totmacher (Nov 30, 2007)

I can dig this. Not my cup of tea, but I can understand it. The only thing I can say that hasn't been said before is it almost sounds like your fantasies are a bit... reactionary to me. I'm not a shrink, but I know I've thought simillar things after reading my millionth, " I would never advocate risking someone's health" disclaimor.


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## Tooz (Nov 30, 2007)

RedVelvet said:


> Your post made me feel like crying.



I really, really have to agree. I am not jumping all over the guy, but...


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## big_gurl_lvr (Nov 30, 2007)

I just hope it will only remain fantasy for you.... if not I hope that nobody will ever agree to share that fantasy with you...


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## ClashCityRocker (Nov 30, 2007)

you're definitely no weirdo...we share some of the same points of interests as far as fantasies go. there are definitely some differences, but that doesn't make you sick or anything. i think that as long as you acknowledge that trying to fulfill such fantasies in reality could come with VERY dangerous consequences, who are we to tell you how not to get your jollies?

(i just realized that everyone else probably just said the same thing in so many words, but redundancy is in this season!)


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## Sweet_Serenade (Nov 30, 2007)

I'm glad AnnMarie was there to still my hand from unleashing a tornado of e-serious.

After thinking a bit, it is your fantasy, everyone has them, and some people fantasize about stuff much more outlandish.
I wonder why you have such fantasies though. I'm genuinely curious, did these thoughts just pop in your head out of nowhere, or did something in your life make you begin fantasizing like that?
I generally frown upon even fantasies involving the harm of others or yourself.

While I think you may have just created that account to post this and never intend to post again.
I'll still ask, what do you in your opinion think of your own fantasies? Does it disturb you to think such things? Do you ever feel guilty about thinking these things?
I mean, just reading your post pretty much shook me up to the point where I wanted to cry. And this is your fantasy?
It's pretty bizarre how minds can differ so greatly.


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## Knyghtmare (Nov 30, 2007)

Im not jumping all over this guy....

If I am wrong, then I am wrong, but I think this is too outrageous to be real.


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## Ernest Nagel (Nov 30, 2007)

From Wikipedia re Sexual Fetishes:

"Modern theory

Most of the sexual orientations popularly called fetishism are regarded as normal variations of human sexuality by psychologists and medical doctors. Even those orientations that are potential forms of fetishism are usually considered unobjectionable as long as all involved persons feel comfortable. Only if the diagnostic criteria presented in detail below are met, the medical diagnosis of fetishism is justified. The leading thought is that a fetishist is not ill because of his or her addiction but because he or she suffers from it."

I've mentioned this entry in another thread but feel it warrants repeating here. _Hypothetically_, if people the fetishist shares their fantasy with count as an "involved person" color me EXTREMELY UNcomfortable with anything in this vein. 

The entire entry re sexual fetishism is quite interesting, btw:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sexual_fetishism

Re the op - :blink:::huh:::shocked: Please note I did not SAY anything.


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## LoveBHMS (Nov 30, 2007)

First off, I agree with LJ that there is a huge difference between what you can think of and what you actually do. Thoughts are not damaging unless put into action.

Second, I think at some point we need to differentiate between the concept of fantasy and the reality of something we'd actually do or want to do. Just because something works for you as stroke material does not mean you'd really want to put it into action, even if you could. Fantasy can just mean something you really really enjoy thinking about and/or masturbating to, but it may or may not be something you'd want to happen or would even enjoy in reality.

A lot of fetish fantasy ideas are super extreme---immobility, an IV of bacon grease, etc. It's not a whole lot different from somebody who is into large breast fantasizing about having a woman whose breasts are so enourmous she has trouble walking or somebody into B & D fantasizing about being kidnapped and sold into sex slavery or even just a heterosexual woman fantasizing about being raped or gang banged.

So it just sounds as though you get off on thinking about the very very severe extremes of feederism. Whether or not you'd really want a woman soiling herself, only you know. But I doubt it.


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## Ample Pie (Nov 30, 2007)

I love how some folks claim strange fetishes and open minds and yet talk about helping to "cure" someone else.

God.


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## k1009 (Nov 30, 2007)

Since we're expressing, I like reading about castration. That is all. 

my pm box is always open

To me it sounds like you're into d/s with a feeding twist. Non feeding dominant partners can get off forcing their submissive to eat dog food or to have sex with strangers. Not my kink, but I've been online for so long now that very little is going to gross me out. Who else has seen that japanese girl shooting eels out of her ****? no, the other one. Yeah, that opening. I guessed you were in your early twenties and looking at your profile, suprise suprise! You probably started looking at feeder stuff when you were in your early teens and the nice, happy feeder/feedee world doesn't cut it for you. Am I shocked? No, like I said, castration ftw, I'm in kind of the same boat. 

On a another note, are you one of those people who gets off on smelly women? I just can't picture any bloke getting it up for a woman marinating in her own waste unless he had some sort of scat/sweat fetish even if it is just in his fantasies.


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## RedVelvet (Nov 30, 2007)

LoveBHMS said:


> First off, I agree with LJ that there is a huge difference between what you can think of and what you actually do. Thoughts are not damaging unless put into action.
> 
> Second, I think at some point we need to differentiate between the concept of fantasy and the reality of something we'd actually do or want to do. Just because something works for you as stroke material does not mean you'd really want to put it into action, even if you could. Fantasy can just mean something you really really enjoy thinking about and/or masturbating to, but it may or may not be something you'd want to happen or would even enjoy in reality.
> 
> ...





oh fine....be all rational and well spoken and calm about it. You make good points...it IS fantasy.

There ARE people who think I am sick for what I like. (D/s: Submissive)

And yet somehow..there is a difference. This fantasy had permanent damage and DEATH in it......this had stuffing against someone's will.

Little different from me *wanting* to get tied up, fake "kidnapped" and boinked "against my will". 

Is ALL fantasy harmless?.....all?



Rape fantasies are about the most COMMON fantasy women have....ask Kinsey. The underlying themes are wanting to feel helpless, wanting to be wanted SO BADLY that the romantic idea of ravishment is played out....as well as the guilt free orgasm (he MADE me come! Its not my fault).....there are darker aspects too, to be sure....but a woman with a rape fantasy....well.......its not really about hatred of men or self loathing or any of that..

It doesnt SAY anything about her, really....garden variety dark.


What do the OPs fantasies say about him? Read them again...what are the underlying themes?


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## RedVelvet (Nov 30, 2007)

Rebecca said:


> I love how some folks claim strange fetishes and open minds and yet talk about helping to "cure" someone else.
> 
> God.




Some folk? You mean me? Who is talking about curing?

Fuck it...I realize that you are the most TOLERANT person here. Your openmindedness has always been remarkable to me. I mean that. It's admirable.



I'm just not built that way. And your snarky admonishments wont fix it. Sorry Rebecca.


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## MisterGuy (Nov 30, 2007)

First of all, who's saying this is normal? Certainly not OP, who clearly needed to unburden himself on this forum, the only place on earth he possibly could without getting roundly mocked or worse. I mean, feederism itself isn't "normal," by most definitions of normality. It's not sexually normal, and it sure isn't societally, either. The abnormality of it is personally, and I don't think I'm the only one, one of the things I like about it, that turns me on, to be honest. 

The fantasies outlined in OP are disturbing, but I bet it would surprise people how common a lot of them are in this community. To an extent, I think fantasies like these are something of a logical outgrowth of more "normal" or mainstream feederism, for a couple of reasons inherent to the fetish. One, feederism has a subtle, yet underlying D & S flavor that is, for many people, a big part of the charm. Second, feederism's taboo-ness, if you're turned on by that aspect of it, is only amplified in extreme examples like the OP.

I'll admit I've had some of these fantasies, minus the scat stuff, which is personally just a gross-out. I also would never engage in this stuff in real-life. In fact, I don't think I'd be even the least bit turned on by it--I think I'd be depressed by a totally immobile woman IRL. But that's what makes it fantasy. 

For these reasons and others, I don't think it's that fair to compare OP's fantasies to those of a pedophile, which has no closer, more acceptable, and legal relative (cue Michael Jackson/anime/preteen beauty pageant jokes). I do understand, however, why this post upsets people, and I think everyone in this thread should be commended for their civility--esp. AM.


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## Admiral_Snackbar (Nov 30, 2007)

Good lord, this thread has Issues with a capital "I", and as someone who considers himself open-minded, the aspects almost give me a headache with the detail.

Also, for someone who is supposedly active in the BDSM community having problems with the post, that alone tells me that it's off the wall in it's design. My understanding (limited as it may be) about BDSM is that it is extreme play, extreme sex, extreme fantasy, but ALWAYS under a safe environment. There is always a safe word, a stopping point, a limit to which you will go and then everything STOPS, even when you tell your top to go the extra mile and 'surprise' them. The issue with that sort of kink is that if you go too far, people get hurt. In extreme cases, people die.

The OP has a fantasy. He states that emphatically beforehand. The admin pops in after so no one takes his head off with a rusty spade. It was all handled so _properly_ at the outset, it's hard to apply the troll formula to it, other than the fact he is posting anonymously for a reason. Given the subject matter, I can understand.

A former boss put on the most loving persona towards his fiancee. He wanted a family with her, wanted her in his life, yadda yadda, needing an insulin shot for the sweetness. Then we go out to happy hour, and not even drunk we start talking about spouses and infidelity and so forth, and he says emphatically and with a sound mind "if that fucking bitch ever cheated on me, I would wish the most vile, horrid form of STD or cancer on her, the most painful death imaginable. No one should disrespect their man like that." So just like, that, POOF, he becomes the precursor to a sadistic pig, not to mention the following months saw him chasing every bit of fluff that gave him a look once his relationship took a bad turn. Another acquaintance (friend of a friend) is 42, never married, never really been kissed, but he chases after the most unimaginable jailbat one could fathom. Almost a Lebowski "8 year olds, Dude" type of thing. There is sometimes very little pressure one must apply to push open the door to someone's id, and it's never a pretty picture.

In agreement with an earlier post: Fantasies are one thing. Fantasies that involve a form of planned and enjoyed torture that bear a hint of crossing into reality can be very dangerous. To intentionally inflict lifelong, permanent physical damage and gain enjoyment from their misery and call it JUST a fantasy, it's just...scary. It's human slavery in the worst way. But yet, it is still a fantasy, and as an American I have to support his right to his thoughts and words as I do for Fred Phelps and his anti-gay/anti-soldier/anti-sanity agenda, no matter how it could be construed as hateful or evil.

I feel for RV here, because this community balances on the back of a very unstable tortoise. feeders, simple FAs, FFAs, post-WLS patients, average plump people who just want a non-discriminatory forum to visit. Then this post comes along and with the subtlety of a cinder block to the skull, makes a lot of people question what it is we all do here and how tolerant and open-minded we really are. 

Very rarely does a post make me worry. It makes me worry on a level that hearkens to interviews of disturbed people when they are interviewed by FBI profilers as to 'what makes them tick, what got them started'. It makes me wonder if I will get the hose again if I don't rub the lotion on the skin.

I've read fantasy stories of such depravity that it would make most people squeal in fear, things that would make goatse or tubgirl or 2 girls, 1 cup seem like 1950s sex ed films. But that was all FANTASY, fiction, ideas on paper. To hear it put in such a 1st person, quasi-reality fashion worries me.

Let me be tolerant of other people, ideas and fantasies. Just this once.


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## AnnMarie (Nov 30, 2007)

This thread is closed for repairs.... it will reopen, with rules enforced.


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## SoVerySoft (Dec 1, 2007)

Let me begin by reminding you of the posted guidelines for this forum:



> *Erotic Weight Gain subforum:* This forum is for use by those interested in all areas of weight gain, feeding and topics directly related to those things. The forum is for positive contributions and participation. In other words, if you have nothing good to say about a topic, or constructive/related pro-topic conversation to add, then you should not be posting and any such posts will be removed or edited as appropriate.



_"This forum is for use by those interested in all areas of weight gain, feeding and topics directly related to those things."_ It makes me wonder why people who are not in that category even read this forum when they know that many of the posts are going to make them uncomfortable or upset.

_"...if you have nothing good to say about a topic, or constructive/related pro-topic conversation to add, then you should not be posting and any such posts will be removed or edited as appropriate." _ Which we have. 

The OP clearly stated "Before I outline my fantasies here, I want you all to know that these are strictly fantasies and that I would NEVER actually live them out because I do not want to endanger the health of any woman." and "In conclusion, I just want to remind you all that these are just my fantasies and I would never live them out."

The rules of this forum are MOST important when the topic is difficult, because it's only under those guidelines that someone could feel able to MAKE a post like this.  The OP might possibly get HELP from some peers who are interested in similar things but channel their fantasies into constructive, consensual role-playing scenarios that don't endanger anyone.

We understand this post is very dark, offensive to some, and extremely controversial, but we've been told to let it stand and apply the same rules to it as we would any others on this board.

This is the final warning about this issue. Anything beyond this point will be handled with infractions or temporary bans from the boards.

SoVerySoft and AnnMarie
/Moderators


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## Admiral_Snackbar (Dec 1, 2007)

SoVerySoft said:


> Let me begin by reminding you of the posted guidelines for this forum:
> 
> _"This forum is for use by those interested in all areas of weight gain, feeding and topics directly related to those things."_ It makes me wonder why people who are not in that category even read this forum when they know that many of the posts are going to make them uncomfortable or upset.
> 
> _"...if you have nothing good to say about a topic, or constructive/related pro-topic conversation to add, then you should not be posting and any such posts will be removed or edited as appropriate." _ Which we have.


SVS, while I understand exactly why this forum is here (which I follow) and why the rules exist (which I try hard to follow), I do call into question one aspect of the rule:

*The forum is for positive contributions and participation.* 

To me, a positive contribution is adding to a forum where like-minded individuals can post openly on a subject. To a degree, most of the things here fall into several categories: A feeder can appreciate, a feedee can consider practicing and an open-minded person can take or leave with a grain of salt. There are always anti-gainers in the area, and I think to a degree, any anti-gainers need to avoid this particular forum just as an African-American would avoid a KKK forum; to me it falls into the realm of _you can try to teach a gorilla to write, but eventually it just gets mad and stabs you in the eye with the pen_.

To post a "fantasy" with the following obvious content:

Forced degradation
Dehumanization
Geneva Convention levels of torture
Induced disease and death
Taking personal and carnal pleasure over such conditions and encouraging or forcing them on the unwilling participant

These go beyond the realm of either positive contributions or even simple good taste. In a dom/sub sense, it violates every aspect of trust between what would be the closest example in this instance.

To me, a fantasy is one of those things that, under optimal conditions of opportunity, impunity and accessibility (not to mention an almost holodeck level amount of simulation), a person MIGHT VERY WELL ACT OUT if those circumstances fell into play. One man may have a fantasy that involves the eroticism of a pregnant woman, another man may take it to an extreme and say "what if she were pregnant with 15 babies at once?" 

If it wasn't on some infinitesimal level a real possibility, it wouldn't provide such sexual gratification. Some people with sociopathic tendencies don't recognize the barrier, and thus the guy with the rape fantasy acts it out in real life and takes the chance at being caught and prosecuted. 

I agree, the OP worded his post very carefully, almost from a legal disclaimer position, and rightfully so. I also feel that this thread, the redacting of posts and punishment of users who voiced an honest, dissenting opinion may have serious repercussions on the site. I for one am deeply disturbed by the whole issue, and I know I am not alone. 

Then again, I can always just 'turn the channel' and go back to Hyde Park. I understand what was done and why, but the overall situation bothers me deeply, and I know it bothers some of the ladies on here who have a much deeper emotional reaction for obvious reasons. _Caveat lector_, I suppose.


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## Jack Skellington (Dec 1, 2007)

SoVerySoft said:


> Let me begin by reminding you of the posted guidelines for this forum:
> 
> 
> 
> _"This forum is for use by those interested in all areas of weight gain, feeding and topics directly related to those things."_



Feederism is one thing and I haven't touched a feeder post since they were given their own area and the mods enacted a don't challenge or disagree with them in any way rule. Fine, no problemo. 

I was not aware this rule applied to things like snuff and scat as well.


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## Ample Pie (Dec 1, 2007)

Yeah, just think if we were all in charge of deciding what was positive and negative for our fellow posters. 

I mean...if I had that kind of power, I'd constantly be calling out the heartless bastards who talk about honoring their wives and yet talk dirty to me on IM. All those silly guys who say "My wife just doesn't understand me" while trying to get me to talk dirty _to them_--especially while they're constantly posting about how they honor their families. To me, that's so negative and if I had the power to decide what was right and wrong for the whole forum--woo wee--I'd really unleash on such fellows.

Whew, thank goodness for SVS and AnnMarie (and the other mods).


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## SoVerySoft (Dec 1, 2007)

Admiral_Snackbar, I want to address one point - the concept of "positive contributions" should be interpreted as "not negative - no attacks". Fringe behavior or dark fantasies are not what we mean by negative.

I need to reiterate that the rules are being enforced - that's what we were told to do. 

If you have further issues regarding the guidelines of the board, you might want to contact Conrad directly.


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## FaxMachine1234 (Dec 1, 2007)

I'm just gonna second what Admiral_Snackbar said and be done with it. It may be against the rules to criticize the OP (apparently), but I'll just say that any kid who happened upon this board (and you don't have to be 18 to browse...or even sign up, really) would probably be pretty freaked out by it. 

This is a free-speech kind of board, but it's not a therapist's office.


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## Fuzzy Necromancer (Dec 1, 2007)

Kids don't have any buisness in the Dimensions forums.

This is Dimns. We have threads for posting butts and penises and discussing the best sexual positions for somebody extremely large.

Do not judge the suitability of something by the sensibilities of an hypothetical impressionable children.


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## MisterGuy (Dec 1, 2007)

Admiral_Snackbar said:


> To me, a fantasy is one of those things that, under optimal conditions of opportunity, impunity and accessibility (not to mention an almost holodeck level amount of simulation), a person MIGHT VERY WELL ACT OUT if those circumstances fell into play.
> 
> If it wasn't on some infinitesimal level a real possibility, it wouldn't provide such sexual gratification. Some people with sociopathic tendencies don't recognize the barrier, and thus the guy with the rape fantasy acts it out in real life and takes the chance at being caught and prosecuted.



I don't think any of this is necessarily true. Speaking for myself, there would be a precisely inverse ratio between the reality of being with an immobile woman and how sexual gratified I'd be by it. I.e. total fantasy=very gratifying; total reality--doctors and constant caretaking--totally ungratifying and unsexy. It's a fantasy, and OP seems to have a handle on this.

I could imagine a similar post on a BDSM board, wherein someone posts that they sometimes fantasize about beating someone, or being beaten themselves, to injury or death. I think when you have sexual fetishes like these, there is a natural tendency to explore them to their vanishing point on the horizon of reality. I don't think OP needs commendation for posting this stuff, which is, in and of itself, pretty disturbing and distasteful, but I also don't think it warrants hysterical responses. In balance, my feeling is if he was genuinely bothered by having these fantasies, it's probably better he post about them than keep it in and not talk about it. My $.02, anyway.


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## Ample Pie (Dec 1, 2007)

Not to mention, ekim, it's pretty negative to imply that someone who is clearly aware of their own fantasies being FANTASIES needs therapy. Just because you might think it's sick, doesn't mean it is. Personally, I think you need therapy for your views on abortion but I've never begrudged your input on the topic when it's come up.




Fuzzy Necromancer said:


> Kids don't have any buisness in the Dimensions forums.
> 
> This is Dimns. We have threads for posting butts and penises and discussing the best sexual positions for somebody extremely large.
> 
> Do not judge the suitability of something by the sensibilities of an hypothetical impressionable children.


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## FaxMachine1234 (Dec 1, 2007)

Fuzzy Necromancer said:


> Kids don't have any buisness in the Dimensions forums.
> 
> This is Dimns. We have threads for posting butts and penises and discussing the best sexual positions for somebody extremely large.
> 
> Do not judge the suitability of something by the sensibilities of an hypothetical impressionable children.



Yeah, those threads are in the Fat Sexuality board. This is not.

And won't somebody please think of the children?


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## FaxMachine1234 (Dec 1, 2007)

Rebecca said:


> Personally, I think you need therapy for your views on abortion but I've never begrudged your input on the topic when it's come up.



And I'll just be ignoring that minefield, thanks.


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## Fuzzy Necromancer (Dec 1, 2007)

No, this isn't fat sexuality. This is the *Erotic* Weight Gain subforum.

Erotica=Not childrens buisness.

The pictures of penises are in the Lounge.

Dimensions is not a board for children.


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## AnnMarie (Dec 1, 2007)

Fuzzy Necromancer said:


> No, this isn't fat sexuality. This is the *Erotic* Weight Gain subforum.
> 
> Erotica=Not childrens buisness.
> 
> ...




There are no pictures of penises on this site, not allowed. If there are, there won't be for long. 

And if you're talking about the "cock" thread, open it and find out what's really in it. Don't assume.


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## FaxMachine1234 (Dec 1, 2007)

Fuzzy Necromancer said:


> No, this isn't fat sexuality. This is the *Erotic* Weight Gain subforum.
> 
> Erotica=Not childrens buisness.
> 
> ...



Yeah, 'cause kids don't have sex drives until they're 18, we all know that by experience!

Kids lurk here all the time; I'm notsaying we have to curb our behavior because of that, but you can't pretend it's not the case.

And what penis thread? I haven't seen it...not that I want to.


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## AnnMarie (Dec 1, 2007)

Guys, really...

The rules are in place, and for now the thread is here. 

Let's move along.


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## AnonymousFeeder (Dec 1, 2007)

WOW. I did not expect this many responses in less than a day. I will try to answer as many questions as I can. 

1. I am NOT a troll.
2. I was a little turned on by creating this post, but only because describing my fantasies naturally aroused me.
3. Every relationship I have been in with a bbw/ssbbw has been completely healthy. I never even encouraged anyone to gain weight. I have however discouraged weight loss by telling someone that I think they are beautiful just the way they are and that there was no need to lose weight.
In reality, I am a very loving and caring person. I have always treating girls with the utmost respect. I can guarantee that every girl who I've been in a relationship will have only positive things to say about me other than I am sometimes bad when it comes to keeping in touch (e.g. phone calls and keeping in contact consistently etc) and that has nothing to do with my feeding fantasies or attitudes towards women. I haven't even raised my voice to any girl I have met.
4. I have no idea why I have these fantasies. I've had them ever since puberty. 
5. It does bother me that I have these fantasies. I feel guilty for having them. However, I know that I will never even consider living them out. I am a little worried that if I am in a relationship with an ssbbw (450+lbs) that I might encourage unhealthy eating habits with the intent of making her fatter. That is why I tend to stick to plumpers and bbws. 

I apologize if I have not answered all of the questions you have. I will continue to read your responses and see what else I can answer. I would, however, also like to add a little more about me.

1. I am currently a college student.
2. I feel AWFUL for hearing that I almost made some of you almost cry. That certainly was not my intention, and I apologize.
3. I volunteered in a hospital for 5 years, but that has NOTHING to do with my fantasy for those of you who may think that I have a general bedridden fetish (I have never been aroused by a patient).
4. I am in a fraternity. 
5. I was a camp counselor for 5 years. 

I just thought I'd add some aspects of my life to show that in reality I am a well-rounded individual. I am not a loner who stays home all day fantasizing about feeding a super obese woman to death. I just wanted to express my fantasy and get it off my chest. It feels good to talk about it. Posting on this board has been a catharsis for me. I want to STRONGLY reiterate that my fantasies are strictly that...FANTASY. I believe in true love and would NEVER do anything to make the one I love the least bit uncomfortable in any way. 

If there was a young immobile 800+lb girl who invited me over to spend the weekend, would I turn it down? ABSOLUTELY NOT! Would I start a long term feeding relationship with her? No! Would I want her to be smelly? No! Would it turn me on to hear her breathe heavily due to her excess weight? Yea *blushes. Would I worry about her health? Yes. 

I better end this post before I start rambling. Again, thank you for your responses. I look forward to continuing to hear what you have to say.


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## FaxMachine1234 (Dec 1, 2007)

Hey, I don't think you're a bad person or anything for having these fantasies (though I find them incredibly troubling); I just think it's on the wrong board and could be seen by kids. Hell, even a name change to indicate the content of the thread would be helpful.

AnonymousFeeder, I would get help for these fantasies if I were you, especially if you're worried about them impacting your behavior and possibly causing you to hurt somebody else (granted in a not-too-easily accessible situation). Leaving this kind of thing to mull around in your head is unhealthy, and I don't think any of us here are licensed offer anything but advice.


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## fatchicksrockuk (Dec 1, 2007)

Ekim said:


> AnonymousFeeder, I would get help for these fantasies if I were you, especially if you're worried about them impacting your behavior and possibly causing you to hurt somebody else (granted in a not-too-easily accessible situation). Leaving this kind of thing to mull around in your head is unhealthy, and I don't think any of us here are licensed offer anything but advice.



I think suggesting he gets help for his fantasy is a very dangerous suggestion. To 90% of the general public, there is probably no difference between an FA and a Feeder. It's only a small step away from saying FA's should seek treatment to make them normal, or saying we should try to cure gay people. You simply can't. So long as he is not hurting anyone else with his fantasy, in my opinion, nothing wrong with it. He should be congratulated for being brave enough to post here, where he has got the reaction that he probably expected.


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## FaxMachine1234 (Dec 1, 2007)

fatchicksrockuk said:


> I think suggesting he gets help for his fantasy is a very dangerous suggestion. To 90% of the general public, there is probably no difference between an FA and a Feeder. It's only a small step away from saying FA's should seek treatment to make them normal, or saying we should try to cure gay people. You simply can't. So long as he is not hurting anyone else with his fantasy, in my opinion, nothing wrong with it. He should be congratulated for being brave enough to post here, where he has got the reaction that he probably expected.



Yeah well, you can make a step from anything to anything if you put your mind to it. Trying to act like this is a referendum on feederism in general is muddying the issue; he acknowledged in his own post that he was troubled by the _particular_ fantasy mentioned in the OP, not his love of fat women. I'm not saying there's something wrong with him mentally for having the fantasy (although he had to have known it would be shocking when he posted it here), it's just that thoughts like that are not healthy to keep around in one's head, especially for someone who regularly dates larger women (tho again, I totally believe him that he would never ever act on those thoughts). I don't think it was inappropriate advice.

And thanks for the title change, mods.


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## altered states (Dec 1, 2007)

I share some, not all, of your fantasies. Many people in my life who know me well know I'm an FA. NO ONE* knows I have feeder fantasies, including the woman I've lived with for 18 years. I am not proud of my feeder fantasies, and I'm not proud of the fact that it's a secret. But I don't like the idea of fantasies that involve hurting or manipulating other people, so my "solution" is to put those feelings into a box on a shelf, accept it as part of me and go on with my life.

(* that is, no one who knows my complete real name, except CCBill and a few independent video companies.)

The creation of the Dimensions Weight Board was a mixed bag for me. On one hand, it was exciting to have a forum for my fantasies, and enlightening and somewhat comforting that I wasn't alone in my feelings (similar to finding Dimensions the magazine a few years prior and "discovering" other FAs). On the other hand, I admit it's allowed me to wallow in certain ugly aspects of my fantasies in ways where I was no longer such a passive observer and the results were no longer fantasy. I'm referring to the fact that over the years, real feedees have been on these boards, and have been cheered on by feeders, and even helped in more direct ways, and some of them have suffered severe consequences. For this reason, I no longer cheer on people to gain. I have however patronized sites and bought videos from women who were obvious feedees, including ones who weren't necessarily headed for a healthy place, physically or mentally. It's more passive, sure, and everyone involved is a consenting adult, and this is a free country, etc, but when I step back from it, I'm still disturbed by it, for myself and the people more actively involved. 

I still like the idea of an open forum where people like me can (let's face it) get our rocks off in a free, safe way, but the nature of the internet is that it casts such a big net that we just KNOW there are people out there who are taking it very seriously and harming themselves and others. I have been here since the start of this site, and this has been a source of tension from the beginning, when there was a fraction of the amount of people involved. It's a source of tension inside me, and after 10 years I still don't have an answer to it. 

Issues of free speech and open communication aren't easy ones. I still believe that we have a right to what we feel, and that when there's a controversy, the greater good is to have it out in an open way. I think the moderators here do their best to try and wrangle this into a discussion, and I know that opposing views in the forum, while sometimes annoying, have made me question what it's all about, and what is acceptable behavior even in the anonymous free-for-all of the internet. Even this thread contains many severely dissenting and downright horrified responses that are perhaps a much-needed cold bucket of water on the whole situation. Again, taking the whole thing out of it's cave is beneficial. We can learn and stay human.

I don't know... I don't know... there's a lot more to say, but this is an internet forum, not the Encyclopedia Feederica. The discussion goes on.


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## Ruby Ripples (Dec 1, 2007)

Thankyou for your second post, Anonymous. I've very much enjoyed reading this thread, looking at all the differing opinions/takes on the situation, and also being educated. I do feel that I HAVE been educated on here and been able to make an adjustment to my first reaction. 

I was thinking about how I do know other people who have fantasies almost to the extent of yours, but they don't go as far as the enjoyment of the dirtiness, distress etc of the women.... or.. do they? Maybe some of them do too, but would just never admit to it. I'm sure many people have pretty extreme fantasies but never feel able to vocalise them in case they are told they need help, like you have been told on this thread. Lots of women as stated before, have rape or gang bang fantasies, but they would NEVER want to experience that, as the reality would be horrific. I don't think they need help. So, I can see that a kind and caring person could have a dark fantasy which involves some humiliation, control etc, while never wanting to live it out in reality.

You said about not dating ssbbw because you are worried that you would be encouraging her to get bigger etc. That shows concern in itself for a woman's health and wellbeing. However, do you not feel concern at encouraging smaller bbws to get bigger then, or do you just feel they have further to go before the weight would affect their health? Different people have different health issues at very different sizes. Or is it that the size of an ssbbw triggers off those darker fantasies? Im really interested to know. And I know that a lot of men with feeder tendencies do have that concern/guilt feelings about wanting a woman so big it affects her health, and guilt about being turned on by her being out of breath and struggling to do everyday things. It would appear to be an issue that feeders have, and I'd be more concerned if you didn't have those guilt/concern feelings about your turn-on. 

I must say though, I hope to God you DON'T ever get the opportunity to fulfill the 800lb weekend girl thing (yes I know its not likely anyway), because that would just be totally using her as a sex object, then disappearing again, guilt-free because you didn't get her that size. Use her for your own most base sexual turn on, but never consider her as anything more. But I don't see this as something you would need to "get help for" either. I just see that as something a horny selfish person could do.

Now Im rambling.... I don't think you need help, if you do just keep some of the fantasy in your head, you know the parts I mean. If those parts were to get more and more important to you and you really wanted to live them out, then sure, see someone, but I think I'm very much stating the obvious there and you clearly have total insight.


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## Sweet_Serenade (Dec 1, 2007)

I'm sorry I sort of expected you to be a troll.
I don't know, i guess your post sort of dehumanized you for me, and I may have reacted very coldly.
The concern you've just shown really shows me you're a nice guy with some fantasies you don't understand.
Often times we'll develope fantasies, sexual preferences, or fetishes we don't come close to understanding, but we learn to accept them to the best of our ability.
I was on a bit of a high horse myself reacting in such a rude manner, you have fantasies I can't come close to understanding and I reacted harshly, but at the end of the day, says the woman purposely trying to gain a lot of weight.

I'm not nearly open enough to talk about fantasies and such, so it's good that you could just throw it out there, call it what it is, a fantasy, and say it doesn't make you a freak we should all burn with torches and chase with pitchforks. Though we clearly reacted in classic angry mob fashion.

Which I once again apologize for. I appreciate your sincerity, keep a healthy attitude about your fantasies, I certainly don't understand them really, but just don't worry about it I guess. Keep it in your head, or discuss it like this anonymously if you like. As long as you get a vent for your fantasies.


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## RedVelvet (Dec 1, 2007)

I appreciate your second response. It helped to clarify things. 

Thank you for posting it.

I'm still freaked out, but its my problem, and no one else's.


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## Jes (Dec 1, 2007)

Fuzzy Necromancer said:


> . We have threads for posting ... penises .



Never once saw one


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## tnekkralc1956 (Dec 1, 2007)

...that any one of us ever entertains evil fantasies as we live and breath? I'll call them evil because I have them too and they ARE evil. For instance, I often imagine great satifaction from putting a bullet in the head of the last punk cop that harrassed me--but I'm not going to do it, nor will I ever--and I should think that no one else would approve of it either, nor is it a topic I need to discuss, but for the sake of illustration.

From time to time or even on a daily basis we all wrestle with unhealthy thoughts and inclinations and anyone who says they don't is either a saint or a liar. Most of us are never driven to act upon them, because as mad as we all seem in part to be, we distinguish between the right and wrong of it and leave it at that. Those who do not and cross over that line will inevitably endure the Newtonian principle of the equal and opposite reaction--sooner or later, sane or insane.

In my opinion, if wicked thoughts are getting the best of you, you should seek counsel or some greater enlightenment, rather than fulfilment of such dark lusts. You yourself have indicated that your own conscience prevents you from making pain for someone else (at the expense of their health or life) so the point is moot; you are still human and even (by your own admission) humane.

What good you've served by getting these things off of your chest in this arena is between you and your gods and/or demons. It isn't possible for any of us to examine you or your motivations, but for you to take that responsibility for yourself.

As for me, this thread holds no further interest. To your wisdom and healthy peace of mind then, sir.


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## ChubbyBubbles (Dec 1, 2007)

AnnMarie said:


> *from Moderator*
> 
> Just a reminder to people responding to this to follow the board rules.
> 
> You can answer his questions, share opinions, but you are NOT to jump all over him, name call, or be generally negative and snarky.




I'm wondering if this guy is really serious, or if he's just trying to degrade us "big" girls without getting an earful...just a thought.


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## AnnMarie (Dec 1, 2007)

ChubbyBubbles said:


> I'm wondering if this guy is really serious, or if he's just trying to degrade us "big" girls without getting an earful...just a thought.



He has posted back and addressed that, if you look higher in this thread.


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## Webmaster (Dec 1, 2007)

See, this makes no sense to me. So people should seek professional help whenever a fantasy pops up in someone's mind that is not on the Approved List of the Harper Valley PTA? 

No one has any clue why whatever turns us on turns us on. I dare to say that just about anyone has some fantasies that would be troubling and disturbing to someone else. So we make people ashamed of their fantasy life that they have no influence over in the first place. What turns me on is cool and sexy, what turns you on is disgusting and demented.

This is precisely why most people do not talk about their fantasies. And maybe they shouldn't, given what a hypocritical society and people we are. Many couples do not share their fantasies either, and one day they realize the spark is all gone, and all they have left is their inner fantasy life.

Further, some folks appear to have a real problem distinguishing between fantasy and real life. Which is odd as it's pretty clear to your average human being where the line is. What goes and what does not. In real life, whatever is safe, sane and consentual goes, whatever is not, not. And that is for two people to decide. May the first person who has never had a socially unacceptable or improper sexual fantasy object.

Had I ignored my own fantasies, of whom I was ashamed of when I grew up because I did not know anyone else was turned on by fat women and that others were also outraged when fat people were belittled and attacked, there would be no Dimensions. Fortunately, at some point I found NAAFA and likeminded people, and the rest is history. 

What the OP stated is extreme, as he acknowledged, and the sole question was whether or not to drop the hammer of censorship. Dimensions covers the gamut of the human size experience, and that includes the extreme self-hatred we occasionally encounter to exposure to extreme fantasy. The borders are always gray and somewhat undefined. Reasonable discussion of how many standard deviations from the mean the cutoff should be are always welcome. 




Ekim said:


> Hey, I don't think you're a bad person or anything for having these fantasies (though I find them incredibly troubling); I just think it's on the wrong board and could be seen by kids. Hell, even a name change to indicate the content of the thread would be helpful.
> 
> AnonymousFeeder, I would get help for these fantasies if I were you, especially if you're worried about them impacting your behavior and possibly causing you to hurt somebody else (granted in a not-too-easily accessible situation). Leaving this kind of thing to mull around in your head is unhealthy, and I don't think any of us here are licensed offer anything but advice.


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## DoctorBreen (Dec 1, 2007)

As much as it is sickening, really, it's up to you and your partner, so long as she has the free will.

I'm turned on by ladies eating and stuffing, but not by immobile blobs.


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## Ruby Ripples (Dec 1, 2007)

DoctorBreen said:


> As much as it is sickening, really, it's up to you and your partner, so long as she has the free will.
> 
> I'm turned on by ladies eating and stuffing, but not by immobile blobs.



blobs????? WAY to dehumanize. Now I REALLY wish I'd seen this before AnnMarie saw it and edited it!


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## AnnMarie (Dec 1, 2007)

Ruby Ripples said:


> blobs????? WAY to dehumanize. Now I REALLY wish I'd seen this before AnnMarie saw it and edited it!



I'd changed it to "imobility" and removed blobs, but then figured he should just stand by his words. So I reinstated.


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## TraciJo67 (Dec 1, 2007)

I understand the difference between graphic fantasy and reality. What bothers me about this thread, and that it has been allowed to stand, is the extreme undertones of violence, degradation, and murder. The OP referred to women as 'pigs'. He casually stated, as if he were simply discussing the weather, that he'd like to feed a woman unto immobility, and then death. And again, I know: FANTASY. I just happen to believe that some things are better left unshared. I said before, I wouldn't share my own dark rape fantasies on a message board frequented by actual rape victims. Well, here at Dims there are a lot of men & women who are dealing with their own health issues, and a lot of them (like myself) grapple with extreme fear of weight gain leading to immobility & the helpless vulnerability of relying on other people for caregiving. That is a reality. It is part of *my* reality, as I have struggled with recent weight gain & the foreshadowing of health problems that I had prior to forced weight loss. 

I'm not a prude, or the morality police. And certain aspects of feederism are erotic to me, as well. Just the idea that something I have struggled with my whole life .... food ... and the shame I've often felt over compulsive eating ... and the fact that to some men, it would be OK (more than OK) for me to indulge & enjoy myself ... well, it's a nice fantasy. 

What I saw in the intial post (and again, in the OP's follow up, though he was careful to sanitize & qualify himself) is a dominant theme of ... extreme, extreme disrespect to the women that he claims to love. And I can't help but feel that allowing his post to stand (while deleting those that have been critical) is another form of disrespect.


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## Ample Pie (Dec 1, 2007)

This message board isn't frequented by murder-by-feeder victims.

Problem solved.


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## bigsexy920 (Dec 1, 2007)

Feed to DEATH ?????


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## Angel (Dec 1, 2007)

I have a fantasy, too.

It's that I'm fattened up to 600 pounds.

Then to 800 pounds.

Then to 1200 pounds.

Then to 1600 pounds.




To be continued, that is, if any interest is shown.




I have to take a break to go stuff my belly again.


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## chocolate desire (Dec 1, 2007)

When I first read this thread I did cry because it reminded me of a dear friend I lost to feederism last spring.She was in fact the life of the thread. And that makes me wonder deep down even though you say it is just fantasy would you really do it if you had the chance? If some young girl or older lady for that matter was in your hands and felt she had nothing to loose and was at your mercy would you really carry out this fantasy. My friends feeder did without even realizing it until she was gone. I will say she was not allowed to lie in filth or like a dirty pig she was well taken care of but even after a few health scares she continued to gain because she wanted to and he loved her for it. Now he blames himself for her death and beats himself up for it everyday. So ask yourself deep in your heart would you make this fantasy come true if you could?


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## TraciJo67 (Dec 2, 2007)

Rebecca said:


> This message board isn't frequented by murder-by-feeder victims.
> 
> Problem solved.



Rebecca, I'm curious: Are you a feedee? I seem to recall that you've mentioned this before, but I'm not 100% sure. I ask because I'm curious about your motivation for responding as you have. At any rate, I'm not entirely sure that what you've said above is true ... but I think that's beside the point anyway. This message board *is* frequented by people who are terrified at the thought of gaining to immobility or other serious health problems. The OP's post is most unwelcome by those of us who are. I believe that it is seriously unwelcome, in fact, by those of us who love and respect women, irrespective of weight gain fantasies.


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## Santaclear (Dec 2, 2007)

I have some doubt over whether the original poster is for real, not because I doubt that people have these fantasies but because I'm suspicious of the motives behind posting it.

The fantasy is about degrading, ruining the health of, maybe murdering women of this community. Sure, it's a fantasy. But still.

Obviously this pushes the buttons of every BBW who has a streak of vulnerability but with self preservation instinct intact, which is almost everyone. For that reason it goes beyond the standard feeder stuff posted (yeah, I know there's more intense fantasy on the story forums but I never go there anyway) here, reaching to offend.

In a sense every thread, every post on Dimensions represents our community. I don't think this is merely an issue of finger-pointing and uptight hypocrites and PC-ness. I'm not saying the thread should be yanked. But without dissent the thread represents us as not only tolerating but encouraging these fantasies.

P.S. I know the "safe haven" policy here has been implemented because posters couldn't post about their fantasies without being mocked or judged. Where is the line? AnonymousFeeder's post tests that - maybe deliberately, I don't know.


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## Lurker430 (Dec 2, 2007)

Epic psychoanalyzing incoming:

-The OP goes on constantly about how he's always respectful and whatnot... some of the fantasy seems to have undertones of disrespect. I think it's just that with the extreme taken to giving every ounce of respect, the ability to break free of that barrier seems to be part of it, if that is actually there. Kinda like how part of a feeding fantasy can be just losing control over yourself.
-The absolute extremes of it are nothing crazy when you think about it... things that you'd kill for when you're horny and seem like the most appealing thing in the world can become very, VERY gross or insane after you've, err, "calmed down"
-The force feeding is nothing too unheard of. Neither is immobility, nor a woman who smells (for these two also look at the next bullet).
-As for the unhealthiness, I think it's just because it makes the woman seem absolutely beyond ridiculously like a fat pig (I use pig because honestly no other word is as appropriate for it, I mean no disrespect). Fat is often shown in society as unhealthy and extreme weights are seen as really really unhealthy, so... that's really just an extension of it. Same w/immobility. While I admit the whole "on oxygen just to survive" thing is definitely to an extreme, I can't say it caught me too offguard... obviously when you fantasize about something you know you won't have it can get crazy. The insane unhealthiness is in the same category as immobility and whatnot I would say, just to an even greater extreme. Obviously while in fantasy it sounds fun, it really probably wouldn't be in reality, but that's just IMO.
-Fantasies are just that. Clearly the OP has a good sense of self control and knows where his boundaries lie, hence saying how he avoids really large women. It's kinda like someone not getting a credit card because they know they'd have trouble controlling themself with it. No need for therapy here, at least from what I can tell from the post. Hell, knowing when to get something off your chest is good.

...I may need to make an actual account on these boards, I keep getting the urge to post :blink:


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## FaxMachine1234 (Dec 2, 2007)

Lurker430 said:


> Epic psychoanalyzing incoming:
> 
> -As for the unhealthiness, I think it's just because it makes the woman seem absolutely beyond ridiculously like a fat pig (I use pig because honestly no other word is as appropriate for it, I mean no disrespect). Fat is often shown in society as unhealthy and extreme weights are seen as really really unhealthy, so... that's really just an extension of it. Same w/immobility. While I admit the whole "on oxygen just to survive" thing is definitely to an extreme, I can't say it caught me too offguard... obviously when you fantasize about something you know you won't have it can get crazy. The insane unhealthiness is in the same category as immobility and whatnot I would say, just to an even greater extreme. Obviously while in fantasy it sounds fun, it really probably wouldn't be in reality, but that's just IMO.



"Probably"? The guy talks about ignoring if she has a heart attack; that's beyond fantasy in my book and is different territory entirely.


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## chapelhillmensch (Dec 2, 2007)

Misogyny as Fantasy is just wrong anyway you slice it.

I have 15 years of Foster care and had to live with some very twisted other kids. This is the same type of 'fantasy' whether with food,gun,knife,rope whatever. I would hear them go on about Ad nauseaum. Any BDSM people I knew in my later years were quite proud of it and would not hide behind an anonymous tag.

I am not piling on this guy but for Christ sakes there are 1000 other boards whether Mirc or Web that he could have gone and posted on. Yet he chooses the most well respected mostly clean Size acceptance site there is and ask this dribble.

I am also boggled why Ann-Marie (who is the BEST MOD on any board I go too) would set up any ground rules for this. If he/she is up to asking these questions whether anonymously or in their handle they should be up to any kind of response they get.


I might be wrong but I seriously doubt when Conrad started this the 3 words 'Feed to death' were ever in play in his mind. I might be wrong but I doubt it.


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## AnnMarie (Dec 2, 2007)

chapelhillmensch said:


> I am also boggled why Ann-Marie (who is the BEST MOD on any board I go too) would set up any ground rules for this. If he/she is up to asking these questions whether anonymously or in their handle they should be up to any kind of response they get.



_I _didn't set up ground rules for this post, I reminded those who would be reading and responding of the _existing_ board rules (available in a sticky at the top of this forum). I knew the thread would be controversial and troubled, so the pre-warning to keep rules in mind seemed prudent. 

Nothing more, nothing less.

And thank you, hopefully this reply puts things in context for you.


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## Ruby Ripples (Dec 2, 2007)

chapelhillmensch said:


> Misogyny as Fantasy is just wrong anyway you slice it.
> 
> I have 15 years of Foster care and had to live with some very twisted other kids. This is the same type of 'fantasy' whether with food,gun,knife,rope whatever. I would hear them go on about Ad nauseaum. Any BDSM people I knew in my later years were quite proud of it and would not hide behind an anonymous tag.
> 
> ...



What are you, the Thought Police? It's not even ABOUT misogyny.


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## LoveBHMS (Dec 2, 2007)

chapelhillmensch said:


> Misogyny as Fantasy is just wrong anyway you slice it.
> 
> I have 15 years of Foster care and had to live with some very twisted other kids. This is the same type of 'fantasy' whether with food,gun,knife,rope whatever. I would hear them go on about Ad nauseaum. Any BDSM people I knew in my later years were quite proud of it and would not hide behind an anonymous tag.
> 
> ...



You're missing the point of this thread. He said it was a fantasy. In other words, something he enjoys thinking about. There is a world of difference between your mind being able to conjure something up and having any plans or even interest to turn it into reality.

Lots of women have rape fantasies, but nobody wants to be raped.

As Lurker put it, these ideas the OP has are just the outer extremes of being an FA or a feeder.


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## Zackariah (Dec 2, 2007)

There are a few things I'd like to point out, here. 

The first is that I read several posts that stated, "I know you said this was fantasy, but because of (insert personal experience here,) are you sure you can REALLY control your desires?" 

I just want to focus on how very insulting to the OP I think these comments are. Everyone, to the best of my knowledge, desires to do something wrong, at some point in their life. Generally, I would hope, most of us are taught values, and a sense of right and wrong to be drawn from those values, along with a sense of ethics. I feel fairly confident in saying that I think everyone has desired something that wasn't theirs at some point in their life, but generally, because we understand that stealing is unethical and a detriment to society, we control the urge to take what we desire. How is a desire to feed someone to death, that is controlled because murder is wrong, any different, except on a matter of the relative damage caused by the act?

As a second point, is it any more fair to regard an anonymous poster who has clearly stated his understanding that his desires must remain fantasy as a danger to others, than it would be to assume things about the character of someone on these boards based merely on their weight? We are all looking at an incomplete picture here, and the willingness that (and here, this is just opinion, stated as such) some of the poster seem to have shown to "fill in the blanks" of the OP's character with fears born of their own personal experiences... well, I don't think that bodes well for the greater community's chance at ever being accepted by the rest of society, who are so eager to paint their own fears onto -us.- 

I don't intend any disrespect to any of the posters in this thread asking these questions, and if you find that you disagree, I am satisfied merely that I had my say, and perhaps you considered my position before reaffirming your own. I wouldn't react any differently than I did here, if, for example, an anonymous poster appeared on these boards, stating their concern that fat acceptance might lead to an increase in weight related health problems. Both positions, I believe, are based on some basically wrong assumptions - in one case, that anyone can rightly generalize about the potential behavior of an individual based on their desires, and in the other case, that all people who aren't thin are of course all unhealthy. 

As I've said before... in a community that is looking for acceptance, we should not expect anything we are not able to give in return.


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## FaxMachine1234 (Dec 2, 2007)

While I don't think the poster is msygonistic, I think the fantasy itself is, and was bound to make many women (and just people in general) very uncomfortable. Here, threads that are merely anti-fat are shot down here, but one that expresses a horrific mistreatment of a (fictional) fat woman is allowed to keep going, and in fact any responses expressing ill-ease are labeled "censorship." That ain't right.

And how does this thread fall under "positive contributions", by the way?


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## FaxMachine1234 (Dec 2, 2007)

Zackariah said:


> We are all looking at an incomplete picture here, and the willingness that (and here, this is just opinion, stated as such) some of the poster seem to have shown to "fill in the blanks" of the OP's character with fears born of their own personal experiences... well, I don't think that bodes well for the greater community's chance at ever being accepted by the rest of society, who are so eager to paint their own fears onto -us.-



And can we JUST stop bringing up this particular argument? I thought the FA/Feederism communities have spent years trying to convince the world at large (and the NAAFA) that feederism is not psychologically unhealthy and can be carried out respectfully, and now you're saying that general FA-dom is just a hop skip and a jump away from what this guy was talking about? I'm sorry, but I absolutely refuse that conclusion.


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Dec 2, 2007)

Ekim said:


> While I don't think the poster is msygonistic, I think the fantasy itself is, and was bound to make many women (and just people in general) very uncomfortable.* Here, threads that are merely anti-fat are shot down here, but one that expresses a horrific mistreatment of a (fictional) fat woman is allowed to keep going, and in fact any responses expressing ill-ease are labeled "censorship." That ain't right.*
> 
> And how does this thread fall under "positive contributions", by the way?



My thoughts exactly....and my question, too.


Oh and just because someone claims to be *insert list of sunshine yellow things here* "in reality" doesn't mean I believe everything I read on the net......


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## MisterGuy (Dec 2, 2007)

Jesus. This is the "erotic weight gain" section of the WB. OP posted a very disturbing fantasy he finds erotic, and has, to my mind, convincingly disavowed wanting to actually take part in. 

I feel like the negative responses here are part of the same old BS--basically people who find feederism laughable or degrading or distasteful coming onto the WB and expressing their dislike for it, to no conceivable profit or end. Yes, I understand that OP's fantasies are disgusting and nonconsensual, but they provocatively explore the extreme side of a fetish many here have. It would be interesting if the negative posters in this thread had something to add to this discussion beyond "get help," or "this has no place here."


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## vermillion (Dec 2, 2007)

Do I think your a sicko???


Kinda....


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## RedVelvet (Dec 2, 2007)

MisterGuy said:


> It would be interesting if the negative posters in this thread had something to add to this discussion beyond "get help," or "this has no place here."




It could be that they feel that there is really nothing more to add than that.

What would a good addition to this discussion consist of, I wonder, for someone who found the post profoundly disturbing and hateful?

Seems to be in your mind...they should either not respond, or respond in a way that somehow values the original post.

What if they see no value in it?

Why is that not a viable choice?

Why is exploring the most degrading and vile and extreme aspects of a fetish considered important and viable and needed?


What is the value?

Thats a serious question...I'm not being flip.

What IS the value of exploring the most depraved extremes of a fetish here?.....besides wank fodder...is there another value?

What is it?

Or is that enough?


I really am being serious...there is no sarcasm involved. I want to understand what the value of this post is besides titillation.


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## bexy (Dec 2, 2007)

i dont want to comment too much, your own fantasy is your own fantasy. we cannot control what gets people off. the post upset me slightly, the imagery portrayed was extreme.
i pity the girls the OP dates "treats so well" as he seems to really be hiding part of himself.
i pity the OP if this is what he really gets off on, as it must be difficult to cope with.

all i would like to say is i find it interesting the OP has only posted twice. 
have we just scared him off?

bexy x


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## bigsexy920 (Dec 2, 2007)

I'm still stuck on the line "to death" I just feel like anything, not matter what it is if you need to do it till the person you are doing it to is dead in order to feel gratified is just wrong on so many levels. 

Maybe Im missing the point but for me I just can't get the to death part to sit right. Yes I understand about fantasy but a lot of people in our world fufill their fantisies - till death. Scary


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## Suze (Dec 2, 2007)

bigsexy920 said:


> I'm still stuck on the line "to death" I just feel like anything, not matter what it is if you need to do it till the person you are doing it to is dead in order to feel gratified is just wrong on so many levels.
> 
> Maybe Im missing the point but for me I just can't get the to death part to sit right. Yes I understand about fantasy but a lot of people in our world fufill their fantisies - till death. Scary



seconded.
why doesn't anyone close this thread??? it's doomed to lead to no good. everyone has their dark secrets, but this is just too much information.

(2girls1cup are sesame street compared to this shizzle)


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## imfree (Dec 3, 2007)

susieQ said:


> seconded.
> why doesn't anyone close this thread??? it's doomed to lead to no good. everyone has their dark secrets, but this is just too much information.
> 
> (2girls1cup are sesame street compared to this shizzle)


AMEN

Right this way, please. 

View attachment ! Closed Threads web.jpg


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## AnnMarie (Dec 3, 2007)

susieQ said:


> seconded.
> why doesn't anyone close this thread??? it's doomed to lead to no good. everyone has their dark secrets, but this is just too much information.
> 
> (2girls1cup are sesame street compared to this shizzle)





imfree said:


> AMEN
> 
> Right this way, please.



Please see Conrad's post earlier in this thread about why it's here.

Thank you.


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## MisterGuy (Dec 3, 2007)

RedVelvet said:


> It could be that they feel that there is really nothing more to add than that.
> 
> What would a good addition to this discussion consist of, I wonder, for someone who found the post profoundly disturbing and hateful?
> 
> ...



Well, for the OP, I think he says it was a relief to get this stuff off his chest, which I guess has some value right there. I think a good addition to this discussion might consist of, I dunno, exploring why a fetish a lot of folks have here might be, and often is, taken to this extreme, if only on a fantasy level. 

Besides that, you and others are obviously entitled to your opinion, and I can certainly see why this fantasy has disturbed a lot of people here--I didn't mean to come off as saying "STFU." I guess the reactions to this post remind me of reactions to many other, albeit less disturbing, feeder posts--to an extent, I do sort of feel that the WB and this subboard are like an ongoing car wreck that people with no vested interest, sexual or otherwise, feel compelled to gawk at and express their distaste for from time to time (pardon the bad/mixed metaphor). And to an extent, I do feel like folks with more delicate sensibilities would do best just to steer clear of this forum in general.


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## Suze (Dec 3, 2007)

Yey
Lets see what more positive outcome this will bring then. It sure has been a fun and cozy ride so far.


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## SocialbFly (Dec 3, 2007)

SoVerySoft said:


> Let me begin by reminding you of the posted guidelines for this forum:
> 
> 
> 
> ...



i understand what you are saying, but i think maybe when it involves the DEATH of someone, maybe this needs to be looked at a little closer. Feeding, fine...immobility, if it is your stick...fine....but death, shouldnt there be a line drawn in the sand here.....

somehow this seems very very wrong.

would the fantasy of sitting on someones face til they died be a good topic too? just curious?


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## AnnMarie (Dec 3, 2007)

SocialbFly said:


> i understand what you are saying, but i think maybe when it involves the DEATH of someone, maybe this needs to be looked at a little closer. Feeding, fine...immobility, if it is your stick...fine....but death, shouldnt there be a line drawn in the sand here.....
> 
> somehow this seems very very wrong.
> 
> would the fantasy of sitting on someones face til they died be a good topic too? just curious?



Again, please see Conrad's post earlier in this thread about why this post is here.


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## SocialbFly (Dec 3, 2007)

TraciJo67 said:


> I understand the difference between graphic fantasy and reality. What bothers me about this thread, and that it has been allowed to stand, is the extreme undertones of violence, degradation, and murder. The OP referred to women as 'pigs'. He casually stated, as if he were simply discussing the weather, that he'd like to feed a woman unto immobility, and then death. And again, I know: FANTASY. I just happen to believe that some things are better left unshared. I said before, I wouldn't share my own dark rape fantasies on a message board frequented by actual rape victims. Well, here at Dims there are a lot of men & women who are dealing with their own health issues, and a lot of them (like myself) grapple with extreme fear of weight gain leading to immobility & the helpless vulnerability of relying on other people for caregiving. That is a reality. It is part of *my* reality, as I have struggled with recent weight gain & the foreshadowing of health problems that I had prior to forced weight loss.
> 
> I'm not a prude, or the morality police. And certain aspects of feederism are erotic to me, as well. Just the idea that something I have struggled with my whole life .... food ... and the shame I've often felt over compulsive eating ... and the fact that to some men, it would be OK (more than OK) for me to indulge & enjoy myself ... well, it's a nice fantasy.
> 
> What I saw in the intial post (and again, in the OP's follow up, though he was careful to sanitize & qualify himself) is a dominant theme of ... extreme, extreme disrespect to the women that he claims to love. And I can't help but feel that allowing his post to stand (while deleting those that have been critical) is another form of disrespect.



wow, you said it 10000 times better than me (reading backwards is a true talent) and i couldnt agree more.


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## SocialbFly (Dec 3, 2007)

My bad. (BUT his is farrrrrrrrrrrrr worse.)


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## chapelhillmensch (Dec 3, 2007)

AnnMarie said:


> _I _didn't set up ground rules for this post, I reminded those who would be reading and responding of the _existing_ board rules (available in a sticky at the top of this forum). I knew the thread would be controversial and troubled, so the pre-warning to keep rules in mind seemed prudent.
> 
> Nothing more, nothing less.
> 
> And thank you, hopefully this reply puts things in context for you.



When you put it that way I understand,I really meant the Best MOD part btw


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## Angel (Dec 3, 2007)

Zackariah said:


> There are a few things I'd like to point out, here.
> 
> The first is that I read several posts that stated, "I know you said this was fantasy, but because of (insert personal experience here,) are you sure you can REALLY control your desires?"
> 
> I just want to focus on how very insulting to the OP I think these comments are. Everyone, to the best of my knowledge, desires to do something wrong, at some point in their life. Generally, I would hope, most of us are taught values, and a sense of right and wrong to be drawn from those values, along with a sense of ethics. I feel fairly confident in saying that I think everyone has desired something that wasn't theirs at some point in their life, but generally, because we understand that stealing is unethical and a detriment to society, we control the urge to take what we desire.



Stealing involves taking an *object* or something that doesn't rightfully belong to you. The lone act of stealing an *object* doesn't _hurt_ or _injure_ the object. 






Zackariah said:


> How is a desire to feed someone to death, that is controlled because murder is wrong, any different, except on a matter of the relative damage caused by the act?



"Someone" is a human being; and unlike stealing which involves an *object*, this "someone" -even if only a fantasy within the OP's or extreme feeder's mind- is intentionally being _harmed_ to the point of death.


You may not see any difference between the desire to steal an object and the desire to fantasize about doing something that intentionally involves _harming_ or _bringing about_ the death of another human.


What many are failing to see is the ultimate desires of the stated fantasy. 

It doesn't matter if the feedee in the fantasy is male or female, what matters is that that fantasy has absolutely no regard, care, or concern for the "someone" ; every ounce of dignity that "someone" may have once had was _*taken*_
from them; and there is absolutely no respect for the sanctity of that someone's life.






Zackariah said:


> As a second point, is it any more fair to regard an anonymous poster who has clearly stated his understanding that his desires must remain fantasy as a danger to others, than it would be to assume things about the character of someone on these boards based merely on their weight?




Dangerous desires vs. a fat person's character?

Come on! If you are truly an FA and have learned anything from Dimensions, you would know that a person's character has absolutely NOTHING to do with their weigh! If your comparison/assumpion held any logic whatsoever, every slim person would be a saint!

Let me take this a step further so you can see what I'm getting at.

Where do crimes begin? They don't begin when the crime is committed. They don't begin with the act. Crimes begin in the mind. 

When does one become a pedophile? If a person has fantasies and desires about molesting toddlers, wouldn't you believe his desires and fantasies to be dangerous? **IF** you could see into the mind of such a person, at what point would you view them to be a pedophile? Would it be based upon their fantasies and desires? Or would you not think of them as a pedophile until *after* they had _harmed_ or _injured_ an innocent and unwilling victim? 



Ah! That brings up another point. 

Willingness and mutual consent. 


*IF* the OP would have stated that his fantasies involved a willing and consenting feedee...............




Again, the subject of the fantasies was only *an object*. 





If you guys still don't get why so many are upset by the first post, that is why. The feedee was merely an object, not a female with feelings and emotions. Nothing was mutual. That, and that she was fed to death. 




Zackariah said:


> As I've said before... in a community that is looking for acceptance, we should not expect anything we are not able to give in return.



It would help if women were seen as humans and as something more than simply a means of sexual gratification. Until that happens, women will continually be negated to being objects or toys - even if it is within the realm of *fantasy*.


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## Kortana (Dec 3, 2007)

I have been watching this thread for a few days and I really wasn't going to say anything. But oh well..

First off, (and I could be soooo wrong here...) but why is it that the people that are responding to this thread are the ones that rarely post on the weight board and only do when something they deem distastful pops up. Like I said, I could be wrong but there are some names I have noticed that have stated their opinion that usually only visit the weight board to "crap on" a post or poster.

As for the OP, no matter how extreme the post was- my personal feelings aside- I think an outlet was defintely needed for him. And I think this board was a good place for it. I only wish that more people who post and contribute the weight board everyday would reach out and say something to this young guy...he is obviously really torn by these fantasies.


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## bexy (Dec 3, 2007)

bexylicious said:


> i dont want to comment too much, your own fantasy is your own fantasy. we cannot control what gets people off. the post upset me slightly, the imagery portrayed was extreme.
> i pity the girls the OP dates "treats so well" as he seems to really be hiding part of himself.
> i pity the OP if this is what he really gets off on, as it must be difficult to cope with.
> 
> ...


*
this posted was edited, and i understand why, i didnt word myself correctly. 

what i meant was the OP has not posted again. some people may think that is because the post is disingenuous, phony, or whatever, as ppl have stated clearly in previous posts. 

what i meant was i dont believe that to be the case, i think we just scared him off, by giving him the reaction he has probably dreaded his whole life. 
im not saying anyone is right or wrong, just making an observation but wanted to assure the mod i wasnt suggesting it was phony, quite the opposite 

xo *


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## chapelhillmensch (Dec 3, 2007)

Ruby Ripples said:


> What are you, the Thought Police? It's not even ABOUT misogyny.



Misogyny

hatred, dislike, or mistrust of women.

Misogyny. (n.d.). Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1). Retrieved December 02, 2007, from Dictionary.com website: http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/Misogyny


Hmm I dunno But feeding someone to death seems like a cloaked hatred of women I might be Wrong. I guess 11 years as a practicing psychologist and hearing about these 'fantasies' as well as my youth in the foster system tends to make me more of an authority on this subject. Maybe next time you treat a women who has her nipples cut off by my her Boyfriend who started out just fantasizing you might just read between the lines more.

The fact he posted anonymously to bring this out is no more than glorified stoke material. Reread it carefully and just see how he emphasizes that it's 'fanasty' and not real it sets off other bells. If he/she were my patient and shared this with me I KNOW exactly what issues he/she has and more than likely section them. Tell you what if you don't believe me why don't I forward this off to my Mentor at Chapel Hill and see what she says. By the wayI am licensed in 5 states 3 countries (UK,USA,Sweden).


Thought Police: Absolutely Not,you can think what you want but when you share what you think in a public forum it is no longer in your head. Like I stated before if your willing to say it be ready for the consequences.

But hey like he stated it's only fantasy right? Just ask yourself this question if you really got into role playing with this guy about what he describes would you meet him in person? share your phone number with him? well if you do great!!! 

PLEASE BE VERY CAREFUL!!!!!

Have a Nice Day


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## Eclectic_Girl (Dec 3, 2007)

Angel said:


> Let me take this a step further so you can see what I'm getting at.
> 
> Where do crimes begin? They don't begin when the crime is committed. They don't begin with the act. Crimes begin in the mind.



Technically, not true. The act is the crime. The crime is the act. A crime can be committed without even entering the mind (manslaughter as opposed to murder 1). And thank God, because I'd be serving several life sentences if my wanting to kill someone counted.



Angel said:


> When does one become a pedophile? If a person has fantasies and desires about molesting toddlers, wouldn't you believe his desires and fantasies to be dangerous? **IF** you could see into the mind of such a person, at what point would you view them to be a pedophile? Would it be based upon their fantasies and desires? Or would you not think of them as a pedophile until *after* they had _harmed_ or _injured_ an innocent and unwilling victim?



My personal opinion (which I arrive at linguistically) is that the thought makes a person a pedophile; the act makes a person a child molester. Pedophiles are not in jail for being pedophiles - they're in jail for molesting children.

I do think that those kinds of thoughts and desires can be dangerous but (*unless acted upon*) only to the person having them, and only to the degree to which they prevent the person from developing a healthy, mutually respectful relationship with an actual human being.

And as to the "object" issue, I'd rather have my partner treat his imaginary fantasy objects as objects than treating me that way. As long as he can keep the concepts separate and treat me with respect and empathy, that's what counts. Are there some fantasies that my partner might share with me that I might find disturbing? Probably - and mine might not be his cup of tea, either. Fantasies don't have to be politically correct. But I think it's also okay to be weirded out by someone's elses fantasies. If that person is your partner...well...there's a few conversations that need to happen.

However, the OP is not my partner, nor is he likely to be, so I've got absolutely no stake in what his fantasies are. My response to him is merely that I can understand why his fantasies disturb him and hope that he continues to keep reality and fantasy separate. I would assure him that he is not alone in his dark thoughts, or in being uncomfortable with them and what they might mean. I would also suggest that if he really does want to explore why he gets off on humiliation, he'd probably meet less judgement telling it to someone who is professionally trained not to take these things personally.


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## SocialbFly (Dec 3, 2007)

Kortana said:


> I have been watching this thread for a few days and I really wasn't going to say anything. But oh well..
> 
> First off, (and I could be soooo wrong here...) but why is it that the people that are responding to this thread are the ones that rarely post on the weight board and only do when something they deem distastful pops up. Like I said, I could be wrong but there are some names I have noticed that have stated their opinion that usually only visit the weight board to "crap on" a post or poster.
> 
> As for the OP, no matter how extreme the post was- my personal feelings aside- I think an outlet was defintely needed for him. And I think this board was a good place for it. I only wish that more people who post and contribute the weight board everyday would reach out and say something to this young guy...he is obviously really torn by these fantasies.




you are right, i for one, rarely post here, but the post got my attention. So, here i am, and as a NINE year member of this community, i think i have that right, just as the OP did.


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## AnonymousFeeder (Dec 3, 2007)

To those who have criticized me for only posting twice, I just haven't had the time with my schoolwork to keep up with all the responses. After reading the responses after my 2nd post, here are some additional things I would like to clarify. 

1. I am NOT a misogynist. Whether I am on a date or just out with a group of friends I ALWAYS open the door for a girl, give her my jacket if she is cold, always doing whatever I can to make any girl I am with feel comfortable. If I am giving a group of girls a ride to a frat party, I always open my car door for them and tell them that if they want to leave the party they can come find me and I will give them a ride to campus. I have the utmost respect for all women. 

2. I would like to clarify the reason why I avoid dating ssbbws. It's not because I might be tempted to live out my feeding fantasies. It's that I certainly would not encourage weightloss, and I know that if I fall in love and marry an ssbbw, there will come a time where weightloss will be necessary for health reasons. At that point, I would TOTALLY help her lose weight because she is the woman that I love and I would want her to be healthy. However, while weight gain is an extreme turn on for me, weight loss is an even greater turn off. I would still love her but I know I would be significantly less attracted to her. I know that sounds shallow, but it is a situation I wish to avoid altogether. Why go into a committed relationship knowing there will be a point where I would find a girl much less attractive. It is shallow, but you all must understand that it is because I would want her to LOSE weight.

3. I thought I might add that I like slim girls too. That is unless they have no ass whatsoever. Even then, if a slim girl with no ass has a very pretty face and a sweet personality, I would find her attractive. 

4. As far as feeding a girl "to death," I'd like to clarify that death is not the ultimate goal in my fantasy. It is simply a consequence of feeding a feedee into super morbid obesity to the ultimate point where a girl can't get any fatter...taking her to the limit of obesity without any regard to her health. Heart attacks and oxygen tubes are signs of super morbid obesity. In my fantasy, I continue to feed my feedee no matter how unhealthy she gets. I know its sick and I know that I would NEVER do such a thing. In real life, I would never want to hurt the woman I love. However, I fantasize about it alot. I have told some of the girls I've dated that weight gain does turn me on. I have never told any of them the full extent of my feeding fantasy, and I never will. It will be something I will have to keep secret from the woman I love forever.

5. I would also like to point out that I have chatted with other feeders through chat rooms, and I know for a fact that there are many guys out there like me with the exact same fantasies as mine, and even more who have very similar fantasies as mine minus just one aspect i.e. some don't want their feedees to be smelly, or some don't want their feedees to be unhealthy.


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## Angel (Dec 3, 2007)

Angel said:


> Where do crimes begin? They don't begin when the crime is committed. They don't begin with the act. Crimes begin in the mind.






Eclectic_Girl said:


> Technically, not true. The act is the crime. The crime is the act. A crime can be committed without even entering the mind (manslaughter as opposed to murder 1). And thank God, because I'd be serving several life sentences if my wanting to kill someone counted.



Point taken; though I was thinking of premeditated criminal acts where intent would be unquestionable. 



Eclectic_Girl said:


> My personal opinion (which I arrive at linguistically) is that the thought makes a person a pedophile; the act makes a person a child molester. Pedophiles are not in jail for being pedophiles - they're in jail for molesting children.



True (in most cases).

I still believe that the human mind and human thought process is more poweful than many understand. We may not be able to contol what thoughts cross or enter our minds, but we do have a choice (if sane and mentally stable) as to what thoughts we dwell upon. Same as for fantasies, in my opinion. There is a huge difference between a random thought and dwelling upon or repeatedly fantasizing about something which we understand to be seriously harmful and/or intentionally fatal. 


To me, it's all about intent and consent.


For me, a healthy relationship wouldn't include the desire to be abused or neglected or humiliated; nor would it involve the desire to do so to another human being.


Role playing between adults would fall into the consent catagory.


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## FaxMachine1234 (Dec 3, 2007)

Kortana said:


> First off, (and I could be soooo wrong here...) but why is it that the people that are responding to this thread are the ones that rarely post on the weight board and only do when something they deem distastful pops up. Like I said, I could be wrong but there are some names I have noticed that have stated their opinion that usually only visit the weight board to "crap on" a post or poster.



Yeah hey, how about you don't fill in the blanks about people you don't know? I don't post on the Weight Board as often as I should because I usually feel I have nothing to add (having never been in a feeder/feedee relationship), but I've been a part of the feederism "scene" for (geez) almost ten years, and I've also dabbled in gaining too sometimes. Why can't people simply defend their own points without trying to paint the people who disagree with them as having other agendas?




AnonymousFeeder said:


> 4. As far as feeding a girl "to death," I'd like to clarify that death is not the ultimate goal in my fantasy. It is simply a consequence of feeding a feedee into super morbid obesity to the ultimate point where a girl can't get any fatter...taking her to the limit of obesity without any regard to her health. Heart attacks and oxygen tubes are signs of super morbid obesity. In my fantasy, I continue to feed my feedee no matter how unhealthy she gets. I know its sick and I know that I would NEVER do such a thing. In real life, I would never want to hurt the woman I love. However, I fantasize about it alot. I have told some of the girls I've dated that weight gain does turn me on. I have never told any of them the full extent of my feeding fantasy, and I never will. It will be something I will have to keep secret from the woman I love forever.



Look man, I'm perfectly fine with the rest of your points. I've never thought you were a troll, and I never doubted your ability to interact with women just because you have this fantasy. I'm just saying that your particular fantasy is very troubling to hear to a lot of people here (including the many BBWs on this board), and if you couldn't have anticipated they would get upset because of it, then that's ridiculous. Your fantasy is like, a feedee's worst nightmare, and your promise that you would never follow through with it doesn't suddenly make it go away.

I'm not suggesting you get counseling about it because I think you need help mentally; it's just that these are the kinds of things that are best talked about privately, not on a public discussion forum where a bunch of participants would feel the topic hit close to home. You can show me all the board guidelines you want, but if we were a bunch of people talking in the physical world in a feederism-centered group, this topic would still be considered way beyond the pale.


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## bexy (Dec 3, 2007)

AnonymousFeeder said:


> To those who have criticized me for only posting twice, I just haven't had the time with my schoolwork to keep up with all the responses. After reading the responses after my 2nd post, here are some additional things I would like to clarify.


*
i didnt criticize, i suggested you had been frightened or put off from posting here, just to clear that up *


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## Angel (Dec 3, 2007)

AnonymousFeeder said:


> 2. I would like to clarify the reason why I avoid dating ssbbws. It's not because I might be tempted to live out my feeding fantasies. It's that I certainly would not encourage weightloss, and I know that if I fall in love and marry an ssbbw, there will come a time where weightloss will be necessary for health reasons. At that point, I would TOTALLY help her lose weight because she is the woman that I love and I would want her to be healthy. However, while weight gain is an extreme turn on for me, weight loss is an even greater turn off. I would still love her but I know I would be significantly less attracted to her. I know that sounds shallow, but it is a situation I wish to avoid altogether. Why go into a committed relationship knowing there will be a point where I would find a girl much less attractive. It is shallow, but you all must understand that it is because I would want her to LOSE weight.



You're young, so I'll cut you some slack here. 

I would like to mention something, though. 

Even if you find and choose your perfect ideal girl, you, nor anyone else can control the future. You could commit to your perfect girl, and something beyond your control could happen that would make her not as physically attractive to you. A truly committed person is one who is committed in their heart, and that will not be affected by outward appearances or physical changes. 




AnonymousFeeder said:


> 4. As far as feeding a girl "to death," I'd like to clarify that death is not the ultimate goal in my fantasy. It is simply a consequence of feeding a feedee into super morbid obesity to the ultimate point where a girl can't get any fatter...taking her to the limit of obesity without any regard to her health. Heart attacks and oxygen tubes are signs of super morbid obesity.



Heart attacks and oxygen tubes may be a result of poor health, but not necessarily a sign of super morbid obesity. 

Do you know what super morbid obesity is? 

Medically speaking, obesity is being 20% over one's ideal body weight.
Super morbid obesity is being only 100 pounds above one's ideal body weight.

I'm 5'8". That would make my *supposedly* ideal body weight to be 140 pounds. When I weighed 240 pounds, and initially entering the super morbidly obese range, I was very active and in good health. I didn't have a heart attack, nor was I on oxygen. 

_00 pounds above that weight now, I still haven't had a heart attack nor am I on oxygen. 

Don't equate poor health with being super morbidly obese. There are plenty of skinny folks who are in worse health than fat folks here.

One more thing, I think we all know what the ultimate goal of your fantasy is. 

It has nothing to do with a _real_ feedee or with a _real_ female, for that matter.


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## Ample Pie (Dec 3, 2007)

I really liked your most recent post, Angel.

And Kortana, I was thinking EXACTLY what you said about people who don't usually frequent the weight board...


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## chapelhillmensch (Dec 3, 2007)

AnonymousFeeder said:


> To those who have criticized me for only posting twice, I just haven't had the time with my schoolwork to keep up with all the responses. After reading the responses after my 2nd post, here are some additional things I would like to clarify.
> 
> 1. I am NOT a misogynist. Whether I am on a date or just out with a group of friends I ALWAYS open the door for a girl, give her my jacket if she is cold, always doing whatever I can to make any girl I am with feel comfortable. If I am giving a group of girls a ride to a frat party, I always open my car door for them and tell them that if they want to leave the party they can come find me and I will give them a ride to campus. I have the utmost respect for all women.
> 
> ...



1.Bullshit, ( I have the utmost respect for all women) Yes and we all know that good manners equates a stand-up guy. (I can to make any girl I am with feel comfortable) So do most perverts/sociopaths etc

2.How old are you? Serious

3.Ever stop and think there is more to women than her looks? Do your Thin girls end up smelly and dead?

4.This is by far the most disturbing you have wrote yet on any post. You are trying to justify what would in about 17 states equate man-slaughter Look it up. You also said 'It is simply a consequence' those 5 words are freaking chilling my friend. Karl Brandt would be very pleased. That is the most sociopathic line I have read in a long time. It made the hair on my neck stand up.

5. Ok so you have chatted with others about this who shared your fantasies,....So what it was all guys and no girls? If you really did have conversations with others that are like you then I AM SURE all those items were discussed and answered and masturbated too. I don't buy your lost little sad schoolboy routine one bit. It takes 30 seconds to post a message. You are having a grand time reading all this and I am sure your 'buddies' are as well.

*Intermission*
Also What if someone comes on this boards and says "You know I really fantasize about HOGGIN" ...I think he would find very little sympathy or support. Even though it was just a fantasy?

I think most of you will say that Hoggin is misogynistic because they screw the fat girl and then dump her with that intention all along...And When Our Ladies man's (AnonymousFeeder) fantasy is over she dies and he goes out and gets another to fatten up until she dies. Rinse Repeat. Oh But its ok he loves his Woman. But wait these are hypothetical fantasies right? What the difference when you distill it down and pull back the curtain. The Hoggin woman is hurt emotionally and goes on living. The other woman dies. And not even a dignified death a scat covered smelly death. So How many women do end up dead in his fanasties?
**End Intermission**

If you can't see where feeding a woman to the point of death and having her lie there covered in her own feces where she is gasping for air is not a misogynistic fantasy?!? Then Christ sakes what is it?? And then listen to him explain it as a Fat fantasy and they really love women?? Are You MAD?.....Think about it,He is whacking off to a HELPLESS woman did any of you take psych 101?!? a shit covered HELPLESS woman. Would you like me to cite over 100 psych journals that address that very fantasy and what type of individual has them?? Have any of you sat on jury of a sex crime? Sweet Jesus the Jew ****This IS NOT A WEIGHT FANTASY,IT IS A VIOLENT SEXUAL DEVIATE FANTASY******HE EVEN TALKS OF HAVING TO CONTROL(KEEP SECRET) IT IF HE EVER GETS MARRIED!!!! DING DING DING RED LIGHT RED LIGHT!!!!WARNING SIGN WARNING SIGN

THIS SOB IS NOT WILSON BARBERS WHO HAS CLEAR UNDERSTANDING OF BOUNDARIES IN BOTH HIS XXSSSBW STORIES OR MAGIK STORIES. CARLA DOES NOT END UP A SCAT COVERED SMELLY OBJECT LAYING IN HER KITCHEN

I have said all I can about this thread,I really hope this *MAN* gets help. If you choose to correspond with him PLEASE BE CAREFUL.

But Hell what do I now,it's not like I have been treating people like this for 11 years 

I am done with this thread. I am going back to my Zombie and Fat Guy Threads.


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## Ample Pie (Dec 3, 2007)

"Hoggin" isn't what this board is about tho, weight gain [even extreme] IS, so that argument is little more than a straw man.


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## DoctorBreen (Dec 3, 2007)

AnnMarie said:


> I'd changed it to "imobility" and removed blobs, but then figured he should just stand by his words. So I reinstated.



Hmmm. I meant everything I said, I think that immobility in my personal opinion is just unhealthy and sickening to me. I know some people here are into that, however, and I don't mean to insult them. 
There's a line between sensible feederism not to the point of immobility, and then that which involves feederism beyond immobility, to the point where health and hygiene is a _massive_ (pun intended) issue. That, and being unable to move and helpless, reminds me of a big blob.


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## AnonymousFeeder (Dec 3, 2007)

chapelhillmensch said:


> 1.Bullshit, ( I have the utmost respect for all women) Yes and we all know that good manners equates a stand-up guy. (I can to make any girl I am with feel comfortable) So do most perverts/sociopaths etc
> 
> 2.How old are you? Serious
> 
> ...



I'd like to directly respond to your post.

1. I know good manners does not necessarily equate a "stand up guy," but I do have good manners because I have complete respect for women and would truly in my heart never do anything to hurt a woman. My actions towards women have no ulterior motives. I don't treat them well to lull them into a false sense of security so I can eventually take advantage of them. I have never taken advantage of a woman, and I never will. I can't begin to tell you how many times I have been a sober brother at a frat party and have a drunk pretty girl all over me acting very touchy feely and kissy. Every single time this happens, you know what I do? I drive her back to campus, help her get to her dorm room, put her in her bed, and then start to kiss her...goodbye. Even though every time they beg for me to stay, I never do because I would never consider taking advantage of a drunk girl. Most of the time, they come find me the next day and thank me. Sometimes it even leads to a date.

2. I am 23yo.

3. I value a woman's inner beauty much more than her physical appearance. What you don't understand (and what I have emphasized all my previous posts) is that my feeder fantasies are just fantasies and I would never ever EVER consider living them. Thin girls usually do not end up smelly and dead but thin girls aren't part of my feeder fantasies. 

4. I'M NOT TRYING TO JUSTIFY ANYTHING! I was just trying to further clarify my fantasy. I was just saying that in my fantasy, death is not the ultimate goal for my feedee, but being unhealthy and pushing her to the limits of super morbid obesity is the goal. I admit its a sick fantasy, but thats all that it is...a fantasy. You missed my point completely. I am not trying to justify that if I live out my fantasy that it wouldn't be all that bad. I know it would be. Thats why I would truly NEVER do it. 

5. I am truly interested what people in this community had to say. I've been wanting to post here for a long time, but have not had the courage to do so until now. I needed this. 

I have appreciated the opinion of everyone who has responded so far, but I think you have completely missed my point. 

As for those who criticize my rationalization for avoiding a relationship with an ssbbw, I want to clarify that when I find a girl that I can fall in love with, there is NOTHING that could happen to her physically that would make me love her any less. I would just prefer to avoid the likely situation where down the line she will have to lose weight due to health reasons. I can be equally attracted to just a plumper. However, if I fall in love with an ssbbw, I would never avoid a long term relationship with her just on a hypothetical situation.

For my last point in this post, I want to respond to Angel's second point about bad health vs. super morbid obesity. I know the term super obese is "technically" anyone over 100lbs over weight, but I am using its connotation as someone who is extremely obese (e.g. 600+lbs). 

I know that super obesity does not equate bad health. Bad health in a woman in general does not turn me on. In my fantasy, my immobile feedee is unhealthy due to her hugely obese body. I know there are many skinny people who are more unhealthy and outta shape that obese people. However, If a feedee weighs over 800lbs, it would be unexpected, although not impossible, for her to be in great health. I guess in my fantasy the fact that an immobile feedee would be very outta shape because she is a lazy obese glutton. 

Look, I could've easily just said in my first post that in my fantasy, my feedee is lazy and out of shape. Yet, I knew that if I was going to finally post here about my fantasy, that I would have to totally commit to it and express every aspect of it no matter how negative I thought the responses would be. 

I want to make clear that just because in my fantasy it may seem like I treat my feedee like property, that doesn't mean in reality, my heart doesn't break when a I console a female friend of when she is crying about something that has happened to her, and that doesn't mean I don't believe in, or don't seek true love.


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## Tad (Dec 3, 2007)

AnonymousFeeder said:


> 5. I would also like to point out that I have chatted with other feeders through chat rooms, and I know for a fact that there are many guys out there like me with the exact same fantasies as mine, and even more who have very similar fantasies as mine minus just one aspect i.e. some don't want their feedees to be smelly, or some don't want their feedees to be unhealthy.



I get that you are trying to keep your fantasies separate from your actual life, that you do not plan to live out those fantasies, and actually avoiding situations that would tempt you to do so.

However this last point here worries me. If you get that these fantasies are dangerous and not acceptable, I think you should also be trying to limit how much you dwell on them. Maybe these fantasies are your surest way of getting off, and the thing that your mind turns to instinctively. But there are surely other thoughts that also turn you on, and onto which you can re-direct your thoughts? In which case, diving into these fantasies, posting them here, discussing them with others.....may not be the wisest thing that you can do. 

To be clear, I think that there is value in exploring your fantasies enough to understand which are the elements that really rev your engines, and to recognize the feelings associated with those elements, so that you can recognize when those feelings are coming up. But beyond that, I think it best to start working at recognizing those feelings, and denying them. Forcing your thoughts elsewhere. Getting good at "Oh, yah, and then if she--STOP! Instead, what if we...."

The way you write, you make it sound like you fear you could be powerless to control your fantasies in some situations. Well, you should not be powerless over them, they are just one part of your very complex mind. You should be in control of them, not vice-versa. But that control takes practice, so I would suggest you practice that, not practice letting them be free and roaming.

Which is not to say that you have to make all your fantasies all sweet and light, but being able to reign them in significantly would be a good thing, for you and for anyone you date, I think.

Regards;

-Ed


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## Admiral_Snackbar (Dec 3, 2007)

Every subsequent post by AnonymousFeeder lends me to believe two things:

1) He came out with a fantasy that was so edgy that it managed to offend a ton of people with relatively few coming to his defense, thus he is backpedaling and trying to stave off an initial disclosure that he can't so easily slough off.

2) This is just some prank by a fratboy taking his little ideas to an unhealthy level. I think chapelhillmensch's post hit it on the head, regardless of the hoggin' tangent. One cannot state such an extreme fantasy and then somehow manage to correct himself to somehow sound middle-of-the-road.

This thread had the desired effect, I suppose, any arguments of free speech aside.


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## Kortana (Dec 3, 2007)

SocialbFly said:


> you are right, i for one, rarely post here, but the post got my attention. So, here i am, and as a NINE year member of this community, i think i have that right, just as the OP did.




And I agree with you. I just noticed that there are some posters never come to post anything positive on this board. They venture over whenever they have something negative to say and then we never see another post from them again. I defintely feel everyone has a right to post where ever and when ever they like!!!

In just the short time I have been here the weight board has been changed around for the comfort of all, with the split of the "Fat Sexuality" and "Erotic Weight gain" topics. It was done, as the mods stated back then, to give a safe haven to those who are into Weight Gain but there are always those that come over to be negative and critical.


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## Mikey (Dec 3, 2007)

Eclectic_Girl said:


> Technically, not true. The act is the crime. The crime is the act. A crime can be committed without even entering the mind (manslaughter as opposed to murder 1). And thank God, because I'd be serving several life sentences if my wanting to kill someone counted.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



From what I have seen of this thread...I believe you have said it best and in the same vain that I believe in.


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## Mikey (Dec 3, 2007)

Webmaster said:


> See, this makes no sense to me. So people should seek professional help whenever a fantasy pops up in someone's mind that is not on the Approved List of the Harper Valley PTA?
> 
> No one has any clue why whatever turns us on turns us on. I dare to say that just about anyone has some fantasies that would be troubling and disturbing to someone else. So we make people ashamed of their fantasy life that they have no influence over in the first place. What turns me on is cool and sexy, what turns you on is disgusting and demented.
> 
> ...



Very well said!


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## Jes (Dec 3, 2007)

AnonymousFeeder said:


> 5. I would also like to point out that I have chatted with other feeders through chat rooms, and I know for a fact that there are many guys out there like me with the exact same fantasies as mine, and even more who have very similar fantasies as mine minus just one aspect i.e. some don't want their feedees to be smelly, or some don't want their feedees to be unhealthy.



Yes.
So you already have an outlet for talking about your fantasies, right? Has that been satisfying for you? Are you still looking for more feedback or...?


I don't know who will come forward to disclose similar fantasies because this IS a heated topic and I don't imagine everyone would want to 'fess up without the cloak of anonymity, but I would like to ask FFAs if any of them have the same fantasy, or something closely aligned with the fantasy the OP has stated. Namely, feeding without regard for health, immobility, misery, feeding 'til the point of death. I've tried expressing that as neutrally as I can.  Anyway, woman who love fat partners, women feeders (gay, straight or bi), what say you? Or, from chatting with others in this or other communities, have you run across a significant number of FFAs for whom this is a fantasy?

thanks.


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## FatAndProud (Dec 3, 2007)

...i'm weird..

i kinda think *some* parts are hot :/

what can i say? who wants to be 'normal'


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## LJ Rock (Dec 3, 2007)

Eclectic_Girl said:


> Technically, not true. The act is the crime. The crime is the act. A crime can be committed without even entering the mind (manslaughter as opposed to murder 1). And thank God, because I'd be serving several life sentences if my wanting to kill someone counted.
> 
> 
> 
> My personal opinion (which I arrive at linguistically) is that the thought makes a person a pedophile; the act makes a person a child molester. Pedophiles are not in jail for being pedophiles - they're in jail for molesting children.



Good point, EG... in both cases the person could be considered dangerous, but however you want to look at it, you can't punish someone until they've actually done something wrong. I personally am glad we don't live in a society where we can get arrested by the "thought police" ....not yet anyways! 

I want to add something: just like I feel that the OP has a right to express his thoughts and opinions freely (within reasonably tasteful limits, mind you... which in this case I think he has) I also feel like people who take offense to it have a right to voice their opinions as well. When you make an obviously _extreme_ statement of any kind, you must expect an _extreme_ reaction. Censorship on either side of the issue is unfair. That's just my opinion.


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## stan_der_man (Dec 3, 2007)

AnonymousFeeder said:


> ...
> I really just needed to get this stuff off my chest. I would like to know what other feeders or anyone else out there thinks. Do any other feeders have the same fantasies? Do you think I'm a sicko?
> ...


I wasn't planning on responding to your thread simply because from the darkest depths of my imagination I cannot relate to the kind of thoughts and fantasies that you have, and I felt that I had nothing to add to this conversation or that this is a subject that doesn't affect me. The extent of my fat fantasies are pretty much women playing with their food, slapping their thighs and saying "I shouldn't be eating this" and then taking another bite, or seeing a barista with fat arms shaking a container of frappuccino. Maybe we have nothing in common, maybe we do. I don't know. As this thread has run it's course I've seen that you seem to be sincere in engaging in dialog. I do commend you on your bravery for posting your fantasies, you obviously were aware of the backlash this topic would cause, and as we've seen that backlash is in full swing.

Firstly, I won't pass judgment on you or the powers that be on Dimensions. Considering the controversial nature of your post, I think things were handled as best as possible. This is the Weight Board after all, and it is a place for this type of discussion. I completely agree with Eclectic_Girl about the appropriateness of this discussion and how it was handled... This is a good place to discuss your thoughts...



Eclectic_Girl said:


> ...
> ..., so I've got absolutely no stake in what his fantasies are. My response to him is merely that I can understand why his fantasies disturb him and hope that he continues to keep reality and fantasy separate. I would assure him that he is not alone in his dark thoughts, or in being uncomfortable with them and what they might mean. I would also suggest that if he really does want to explore why he gets off on humiliation, he'd probably meet less judgement telling it to someone who is professionally trained not to take these things personally.



The one digression I have with this quote is that your fantasies do effect me, I do have a stake in what you are discussing. That is why I am now posting. I too am a FA and your fantasies are the drop of arsonic which poisens the waters for the rest of us. Your fantasies are so toxic and leave such residual that even if people with thoughts such as yours are a small percentage of FAs, this is the sort of thing that colours peoples biases towards us and becomes the dark color by which all FAs are all painted. When I get yelled at by a fat girl for asking if she wants me to buy her icecream, this is the reason why. I'm not passing judgment on you Mr. AnonymousFeeder, this is just something I hope you are aware of.



fa_man_stan


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## LillyBBBW (Dec 3, 2007)

AnonymousFeeder said:


> To those who have criticized me for only posting twice, I just haven't had the time with my schoolwork to keep up with all the responses. After reading the responses after my 2nd post, here are some additional things I would like to clarify.
> 
> 1. I am NOT a misogynist. Whether I am on a date or just out with a group of friends I ALWAYS open the door for a girl, give her my jacket if she is cold, always doing whatever I can to make any girl I am with feel comfortable. If I am giving a group of girls a ride to a frat party, I always open my car door for them and tell them that if they want to leave the party they can come find me and I will give them a ride to campus. I have the utmost respect for all women.
> 
> ...



I have a few colorful sets of extreme fantasies that I would never do in real life. For me the thrill is not so much in the acts but in the thoughts/ideas behind them. For example, if you are turned on by another person's hunger the more extreme that hunger the more of a turn on it would be. If one is turned on by lust, the more extreme that lust the more of a turn on it would be and so fourth. In real life watching someone die horribly or commit a violent crime might be disturbing but behind the safe walls of a fantasy the envisioned act can thoroughly scratch that itch without bearing any signifigance in the real world. In the fantasy the act signifies the apex of the consequences of the thing that turns you on the most. Would this at all describe what fuels your thought patterns in these scenes?


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## Tooz (Dec 3, 2007)

This is kind of a shot in the dark, and I don't know if it's been brought up, but...

If one has a fantasy of something and never gets to talk about it or whatever, sometimes that fantasy contorts and just gets more and more "out of hand," so that when it does find some outlet, it's super hardcore.

Maybe that could have happened here?


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## Jes (Dec 3, 2007)

FatAndProud said:


> what can i say? who wants to be 'normal'



most people, I'd guess. 

at least as it applies to this topic. 

i can't imagine anything worse than only really being able to get off on something hurtful, immoral, dangerous or illegal.

it must have been horrible for Jeffrey Dahmer, for example. He was a monster, but I can afford him a small amount of sympathy. Every last one of us knows how strong the sex drive is. Imagine if that very strong drive were coupled with absolutely horrific things, sated only by causing another person misery and/or death.

so yeah. normal. sounds good.


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## snuggletiger (Dec 3, 2007)

Everybody has a different kink and turn ons and that's cool and natural. But when we start getting into areas where someone has to literally die so someone can reach the Big "O" thats not good. I was ok till we got to the she has to have bad hygiene and heart attack range.


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## lysh (Dec 3, 2007)

AnonymousFeeder said:


> 5. I would also like to point out that I have chatted with other feeders through chat rooms, and I know for a fact that there are many guys out there like me with the exact same fantasies as mine, and even more who have very similar fantasies as mine minus just one aspect i.e. some don't want their feedees to be smelly, or some don't want their feedees to be unhealthy.




That is right, you are not alone in these thoughts. While many (most?) on THIS board aren't interested in the same things as you (fantasy and/or reality) there *are* people who do fantasize about the same things as you. Guarenteed. 

I am sorry that there is not an environment available for you to safely discuss your thoughts and desires and that you had to resort to this "best available" avenue.


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## sunnie1653 (Dec 3, 2007)

AnonymousFeeder said:


> (snip) ..Do you think I'm a sicko? .. (/snip)



Yep. Most certainly do.


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## imfree (Dec 3, 2007)

fa_man_stan said:


> ...........snipped...........
> 
> The one digression I have with this quote is that your fantasies do effect me, I do have a stake in what you are discussing. That is why I am now posting. I too am a FA and your fantasies are the drop of arsenic which poisons the waters for the rest of us. Your fantasies are so toxic and leave such residual that even if people with thoughts such as yours are a small percentage of FAs, this is the sort of thing that colours peoples biases towards us and becomes the dark color by which all FAs are all painted. When I get yelled at by a fat girl for asking if she wants me to buy her icecream, this is the reason why. I'm not passing judgment on you Mr. AnonymousFeeder, this is just something I hope you are aware of.
> 
> fa_man_stan



There are people who hate me because they really believe that I have a fantasy life like that which AnonymousFeeder stated. I'm a Gentleman, FA,
and a Christian. I can reconcile those together because I would never, even in my darkest fantasies, expect my lover to even be as obese as I am. Though it is more difficult, I can still walk short distances and I can still keep myself clean. I'm 5'8"@430 lbs, age 52.


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## Ample Pie (Dec 3, 2007)

This line of reasoning is BS, too. Saying this man blemishes FAs is like saying that FAs blemish all men. There are LOTS of people who think FAs have a freakishly weird fetish---lots of people think fat is GROSS, SICK, etc. If you're going to use that line of BS to justify your outcry about this fantasy, you might as well look at the glass house around you. Do I think FAs are sick? No. But many many many people do. So if the reason we're allowed to jump on a guy who has a predilection is because so many people think it's sick, FAs aren't safe anyway.

PS: and remember that lots of people who think Fat Acceptance and fat love is wrong justify it by saying it's just sooo unhealthy for the fat person.


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## Angel (Dec 3, 2007)

fa_man_stan said:


> The one digression I have with this quote is that your fantasies do effect me, I do have a stake in what you are discussing. That is why I am now posting. I too am a FA and your fantasies are the drop of arsonic which poisens the waters for the rest of us. Your fantasies are so toxic and leave such residual that even if people with thoughts such as yours are a small percentage of FAs, this is the sort of thing that colours peoples biases towards us and becomes the dark color by which all FAs are all painted.



Thank you for posting this.

Like it or not, and unjustly so, fat admirers, feeders, feedees, and gainers are often judged and looked down upon, even within this assumedly safe haven we know as Dimensions. 

We fear that which we don't understand. The unknown. The unfamiliar. Becoming something we're not. Losing control. 

When someone has fought their entire life against something and has struggled daily to maintain personal composure and control, all the while believing that there was something *wrong* with themself.......

And then one day realizing that there really is nothing *wrong* with themself, that maybe perhaps they were somehow intended or created to be this way, and then slowly coming to terms with the person they have been all along.......

And learning to live with this new found freedom.......

Finally accepting and loving the person they are inside, even if the world doesn't or never will fully comprehend or accept.......

You think you've finally come to terms with who you are. Then you read or hear something so disturbing.......


That you begin to question your mere association.


It shouldn't be like that. Especially here at Dimensions.


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## RedVelvet (Dec 3, 2007)

Rebecca said:


> This line of reasoning is BS, too. Saying this man blemishes FAs is like saying that FAs blemish all men. There are LOTS of people who think FAs have a freakishly weird fetish---lots of people think fat is GROSS, SICK, etc. If you're going to use that line of BS to justify your outcry about this fantasy, you might as well look at the glass house around you. Do I think FAs are sick? No. But many many many people do. So if the reason we're allowed to jump on a guy who has a predilection is because so many people think it's sick, FAs aren't safe anyway.
> 
> PS: and remember that lots of people who think Fat Acceptance and fat love is wrong justify it by saying it's just sooo unhealthy for the fat person.





I don't know if they *are* the same.

Yes, its true that some people find fat extremely gross. I would say *more *people find it, oh...unattractive maybe....but arent psychologically disturbed by the presence of it.

I am not sure if thinking "fat is unhealthy".... and not understanding why someone is attracted to it.... 

is the same as.....

finding the idea of a nonconsensual, abused and left in her own filth, force fed even after a heart attack fantasy of a woman gross.

...degree kinda counts here.


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## Kortana (Dec 3, 2007)

sunnie1653 said:


> Yep. Most certainly do.



Nice.

I knew someone would just come out and say it. This poor confused guy comes to the board with feelings of confusion and basically needs to get it all out and gets bashed.

This board was supposed to be a safe haven for this topic. No matter what extreme! Don't you all remember when you were confused about it all? When you couldn't possibly imagine anyone feeling the way you did?

I bet there are more people on this board that have these fantasies that will ever admit!

I agree with Tooz, that these are probably feelings of of so many years of repression expressing themselves...but can you imagine if there was no outlet at all?

I thank Dimensions for being there for so many, if only we could help him understand and control instead of bashing and being hurtful.


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## LillyBBBW (Dec 3, 2007)

RedVelvet said:


> I don't know if they *are* the same.
> 
> Yes, its true that some people find fat extremely gross. I would say *more *people find it, oh...unattractive maybe....but arent psychologically disturbed by the presence of it.
> 
> ...



To the average person there's no difference. Fat is unhealthy, therefore if you prefer your women fat you are a sick f*ck. Rationalizations are only an excuse. Prefering and even encouraging your SO to be fat is as good as killing her for your perverse pleasures.


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## RedVelvet (Dec 3, 2007)

LillyBBBW said:


> To the average person there's no difference. Fat is unhealthy, therefore if you prefer your women fat you are a sick f*ck. Rationalizations are only an excuse. Prefering and even encouraging your SO to be fat is as good as killing her for your perverse pleasures.




Is that really...average?


Wow...I seem to be having a very different experience in the world. I guess I am very lucky indeed.


Also.....non-consensuality and poop always stands out for me as different...guess they always will.


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## FaxMachine1234 (Dec 3, 2007)

LillyBBBW said:


> To the average person there's no difference. Fat is unhealthy, therefore if you prefer your women fat you are a sick f*ck. Rationalizations are only an excuse. Prefering and even encouraging your SO to be fat is as good as killing her for your perverse pleasures.



Yeah, why do we always have to turn to "society" to define anything here? Can we not decide what's appropriate and what's not based on our own standards rather then what John and Jane Q. Public might think? I thought that was the whole point of having our own community in the first place.


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## Angel (Dec 3, 2007)

Rebecca said:


> This line of reasoning is BS, too. Saying this man blemishes FAs is like saying that FAs blemish all men. There are LOTS of people who think FAs have a freakishly weird fetish---lots of people think fat is GROSS, SICK, etc. If you're going to use that line of BS to justify your outcry about this fantasy, you might as well look at the glass house around you. Do I think FAs are sick? No. But many many many people do. So if the reason we're allowed to jump on a guy who has a predilection is because so many people think it's sick, FAs aren't safe anyway.
> 
> PS: and remember that lots of people who think Fat Acceptance and fat love is wrong justify it by saying it's just sooo unhealthy for the fat person.



If assumed percentages are even close to the reality which we will never fully know simply because so many fat admirers, feeders, feedees, and gainers are (for lack of a better term) "in the closet" about their preferences or tendancies, we are in that very small minority which *is* viewed as freakishly weird, gross, sick, perverted (whatever term has been associated) by the general population.

? ~10% fat admirers
? ~1-2 % feeders
? ~1/2 % feedees
? ~1% Ultra SSBBW

We become so comfortable here within the safe confines of Dimensions; and among our personal inner circle of friends; and if fortunate enough to geographically live in an area where there are active BBW/FA associations, with those friends. In a way, we become isolated to the outside world's views. We each find our safe havens, and for our own protection or by choice rarely venture outside of that safe haven. We become so used to the comfort zone which we are accustomed to that we forget that anything different even exists.

That is, until, the day we decide to, or are forced to do something or go someplace out of the ordinary. We come face to face with the society that really does exist. 

We've all read the horror stories; about the cruel things that have happened to others, etc.

The bias still exists. 


Sadly, sometimes, even here.


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## Jes (Dec 3, 2007)

Kortana said:


> Nice.
> 
> I knew someone would just come out and say it. This poor confused guy comes to the board with feelings of confusion and basically needs to get it all out and gets bashed.
> 
> .



Well, he DID ask the question...

i'm not sure why he's a poor guy, though. he has a fantasy. he shared it. not all of us get it or like it. but we didn't chain him to a bed and beat him or anything. He has an unpopular fantasy with some, and a popular one with others. He got it all off his chest and his posts have remained posted. How does that make him a poor guy?

It's a little disingenous to post and say: I have an issue, I have a fantasy and it makes me uncomfortable b/c I know it's very dark, and wrong and illegal and blah blah (i don't recall the OP's words, sorry) and then not fully understand the replies that say: your fantasy makes me uncomfortable it's very dark, and wrong and illegal and blah blah. If those things weren't true, the OP wouldn't have a problem with his fantasy and wouldn't need to made us all his Father Confessor. So it's...odd and illogical to think we wouldn't find odd what he clearly finds odd.


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## LillyBBBW (Dec 3, 2007)

RedVelvet said:


> Is that really...average?
> 
> 
> Wow...I seem to be having a very different experience in the world. I guess I am very lucky indeed.
> ...



Very lucky indeed.


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## Kortana (Dec 3, 2007)

Jes said:


> Well, he DID ask the question...
> 
> i'm not sure why he's a poor guy, though. he has a fantasy. he shared it. not all of us get it or like it. but we didn't chain him to a bed and beat him or anything. He has an unpopular fantasy with some, and a popular one with others. He got it all off his chest and his posts have remained posted. How does that make him a poor guy?
> 
> It's a little disingenous to post and say: I have an issue, I have a fantasy and it makes me uncomfortable b/c I know it's very dark, and wrong and illegal and blah blah (i don't recall the OP's words, sorry) and then not fully understand the replies that say: your fantasy makes me uncomfortable it's very dark, and wrong and illegal and blah blah. If those things weren't true, the OP wouldn't have a problem with his fantasy and wouldn't need to made us all his Father Confessor. So it's...odd and illogical to think we wouldn't find odd what he clearly finds odd.




Jes- you're right. He did ask the question. I just don't know if it was one looking for a response. I totally agree with what you posted. It's just that so many people have posted before about how confusing their lives were before they knew others shared their love for fat women, feederism and the many other fat fetishes. So it just makes me feel a little bad for him since I see his posts as a cry for help. I could be wrong- but like other stating how they feel..this is how I feel.


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## Jes (Dec 3, 2007)

Kortana said:


> Jes- you're right. He did ask the question. I just don't know if it was one looking for a response. I totally agree with what you posted. It's just that so many people have posted before about how confusing their lives were before they knew others shared their love for fat women, feederism and the many other fat fetishes. So it just makes me feel a little bad for him since I see his posts as a cry for help. I could be wrong- but like other stating how they feel..this is how I feel.



I'm not sure how something can be posted w/o looking for a response, and also posted as a cry for help at the same time. 

Morever, he did say he's talked about this a lot with feeders in chat rooms, so like Red, I wonder what the goal of this post, here, is? I imagine he's gotten lots of feedback and validation from other feeders with the same fantasies (he's said so himself). So is he looking for still more of that? In a place where a lot of women, and a lot of non-feeders hang out? I'm not asking you, you don't know. I'm not asking me, I sure as hell don't know. I think Red and I are asking the OP, though. Sheer curiosity.


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## stan_der_man (Dec 3, 2007)

imfree said:


> There are people who hate me because they really believe that I have a fantasy life like that which AnonymousFeeder stated. I'm a Gentleman, FA,
> and a Christian. I can reconcile those together because I would never, even in my darkest fantasies, expect my lover to even be as obese as I am. Though it is more difficult, I can still walk short distances and I can still keep myself clean. I'm 5'8"@430 lbs, age 52.


You are perfectly entitled to be who you are Imfree, I respect that as I think others should. It sounds like you are trying to be a good person, perhaps not perfect in the past, but being respectful or at least striving to do so is what makes civilized society work. You keep your fantasies from effecting others, or at least you try. You have dark fantasies as you state, but you are paying a price for them yourself, not only physically but in how people perceive you. That's just the way life is, the way human nature is. People avoid things they find to be destructive... they avoid things they perceive to be icky. This also effects how people may perceive other fat people, you don't have to take my word for it, other's will vouch for me on this I'm sure. It's fantasies like your's, and like Mr. Anonymous' that make promoting fat acceptance the major undertaking that is is. It's the extreme, the shocking that leaves an impression in peoples minds. It's not some moral that I'm espousing here, it's well documented how the human mind works.




Rebecca said:


> This line of reasoning is BS, too. Saying this man blemishes FAs is like saying that FAs blemish all men. There are LOTS of people who think FAs have a freakishly weird fetish---lots of people think fat is GROSS, SICK, etc.
> ..


.... and fantasies like these only serve to reinforce these perceptions.

I'm not knocking what people fantasize about, they are entitled to whatever thoughts they hold within their minds voluntarily or involuntarily, I firmly believe that. Adding to what I said earlier, I probably wouldn't have posted on this thread had it not taken the turn that it did (in discussing how this effects others...) I'm perfectly content minding my own bees-wax as I think other's should. I'm not trying to be disrespectful to you Rebecca or to others. I've always respected your opinions Rebecca and I always will, but I don't think it's unreasonable to ask people with fantasies like these (call them extreme or whatever...) to be mindful of the repercussions these extreme notions have on fellow FAs and fat people who, from outside of fat acceptance circles, are not well understood. One of these days if fat acceptance truly takes hold, people will more readily distinguish between the extremes and the average. Being an "average FA" (that's a whole discussion by itself...), I feel that my preference as a FA has always been tainted by fears people have of the extremes, because FAism isn't well understood yet by our culture as a whole. Having all FAs being painted as extreme nutballs, because of the extreme few is very real, I guarantee you this has pushed many a young FA back into the closet. What is the answer to this? I don't claim to have an answer, simply being mindful of something is the first step.



fa_man_stan


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## SparklingBBW (Dec 3, 2007)

I'm amazed by this thread. He posted his deep, dark fantasies, and now, here we all are, fatties and fattie-admirers, sitting in our own poop, being force-fed images akin to the gluttony scene in the movie Seven, while he dances around us all wanking his willie while we're chained to the table arguing back and forth and growing bigger by the minute. 

The wanking has gone on long enough. Shut this down mods. You can draw a line in the sand. Nonconsentuality leading to death is a good one to pick.


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## Ample Pie (Dec 3, 2007)

fa_man_stan said:


> You are perfectly entitled to be who you are Imfree, I respect that as I think others should. It sounds like you are trying to be a good person, perhaps not perfect in the past, but being respectful or at least striving to do so is what makes civilized society work. You keep your fantasies from effecting others, or at least you try. You have dark fantasies as you state, but you are paying a price for them yourself, not only physically but in how people perceive you. That's just the way life is, the way human nature is. People avoid things they find to be destructive... they avoid things they perceive to be icky. This also effects how people may perceive other fat people, you don't have to take my word for it, other's will vouch for me on this I'm sure. It's fantasies like your's, and like Mr. Anonymous' that make promoting fat acceptance the major undertaking that is is. It's the extreme, the shocking that leaves an impression in peoples minds. It's not some moral that I'm espousing here, it's well documented how the human mind works.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Then you be mindful of what affect your fantasies have on men in general.

Sheesh, people like you make it seem like men are after women, wanting them fat and unhealthy. And not JUST in fantasy, but in reality.

That was said tongue in cheek, but it's the same thing you're doing.

Is this guy the fan of women he claims? No, he's misogynistic as all hell. Duh. Is his fantasy nice? Nope. So the hell what? It's a fantasy. It's a fantasy that isn't completely out of line to this subforum. Therefore, he should be allowed to post it without attacks on his character. 

I don't believe in censorship and I know all of you beautiful dissenters have a right to dissent and to speak about it, but in this sense it's against the posted rules of the forum AND it only helps to discourage discourse on the issue...which, in my opinion, is way worse that one asshole's mean-natured fantasy.


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## LillyBBBW (Dec 3, 2007)

Genarose54 said:


> I'm amazed by this thread. He posted his deep, dark fantasies, and now, here we all are, fatties and fattie-admirers, sitting in our own poop, being force-fed images akin to the gluttony scene in the movie Seven, while he dances around us all wanking his willie while we're chained to the table arguing back and forth and growing bigger by the minute.
> 
> The wanking has gone on long enough. Shut this down mods. You can draw a line in the sand. Nonconsentuality leading to death is a good one to pick.



Chained to the table?? This thread is like a car accident. You could just drive on by. You could, but you just can't stop yourself. There is no force feeding and nothing straining anyone here. People are here voluntarily engaged in discussion of our own free will. Every single one of us besides the mods could leave at any time without consequence. As for wank, there isnt a thread in this forum that at least three people couldn't find something to wank to - one of the side effects of a forum for erotic discussion. I find aspects of his fantasy arousing while other portions I strongly dislike. I dislike censorship even more though.


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Dec 3, 2007)

SocialbFly said:


> you are right, i for one, rarely post here, but the post got my attention. So, here i am, and as a NINE year member of this community, i think i have that right, just as the OP did.



I post on the weight board quite frequently...and almost anything I have ever said on it has been positive/complimentary. Nice to see someone that rarely posts (44 posts) and has made two "shame on you" posts in this thread attempt to hand slap others for doing so.


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Dec 3, 2007)

Angel said:


> For me, a healthy relationship wouldn't include the desire to be abused or neglected or humiliated; nor would it involve the desire to do so to another human being.
> 
> 
> [/COLOR]




I have been in abusive relationships.......you're right- it is quite unhealthy to have the desire to hurt each other or want to be hurt. I have the "need to be hurt or humiliated" fantasies myself...and know they come directly from my childhood abuse. Yes, acting out those fantasies feeds my feelings of self-loathing.... and give me immense satisfaction.There is no sex or turn on like it- and goddamn it's hard to resist - in reality/relationships, too. 
I don't need to vent them on a public forum and all my fantasies have willing partners. I always get to decide the stopping point in fantasy and reality- just as any partner I am with gets to say when it gets too much for him. I don't claim to be a counselor or Sunday school teacher either....I don't have the need to "prove myself a good person" to justify my fantasies. I am what I am and let it ride. 
Let's call shit what it is...shit. Due to past relationships with abusive men I know how to spot/find them without even looking and feel that he truly does want to hurt someone- just like I let myself be hurt sometimes. Funny, people expect me to take responsibility (rightfully so, too) for allowing myself to be hurt so why aren't other "fantasizers" held to that reasonable standard? Easy enough......


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## FaxMachine1234 (Dec 3, 2007)

Rebecca said:


> I don't believe in censorship and I know all of you beautiful dissenters have a right to dissent and to speak about it, but in this sense it's against the posted rules of the forum AND it only helps to discourage discourse on the issue...which, in my opinion, is way worse that one asshole's mean-natured fantasy.



I'm sorry, but the rules say "positive contributions." Do you find this thread positive in some way?


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## NancyGirl74 (Dec 3, 2007)

I have a dark fantasy (no I will not spill) that I choose to keep to myself because I know it would shock most people...not necessarily because of what it is but because I am who I am. That being said, a fantasy is a fantasy. I have no problem with the OP's fantasy because it's just that, a fantasy. Is it my cup of tea? Hells naw...but that's ok. I don't have to like his fantasy. However, if someone chooses to share their left of center thoughts they should expect reactions such as the ones posted here. I mean, you'll have to take the wtf-are-you-thinkings with the I-totally-relates if you are going to let free your most outrageous thoughts, feelings, and desires.


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## Ample Pie (Dec 3, 2007)

Ekim said:


> I'm sorry, but the rules say "positive contributions." Do you find this thread positive in some way?



That's already been addressed in this thread, you are beating a dead horse.

And again, I don't think your views on abortion and women's rights are positive...but I've never jumped in on the debate against you. I'm not doing that here, merely reminding you that what is positive and what is negative will differ from person to person. The mods get to decide in this case and they have already ruled on your little negativity claim.


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## FaxMachine1234 (Dec 3, 2007)

Rebecca said:


> That's already been addressed in this thread, you are beating a dead horse.
> 
> And again, I don't think your views on abortion and women's rights are positive...but I've never jumped in on the debate against you.



Except you keep bringing it up every time I respond to you. So, because I have qualms about abortions I'm suddenly against "women's rights" in general, even though I'm very liberal on almost every issue besides that? But whatever, this isn't Hyde Park.

And just so I'm clear on this, one can post literally anything weight-gain related on this board, even if it makes fellow members very uncomfortable and possibly cry, and no one's even allowed to criticize them for it? What a charming place we've got here.


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## furious styles (Dec 3, 2007)

This thread is honestly fantastic.

Between the differing emotions evoked and the intense essential concepts like life and freedom of speech that are in play, I see no reason to shut it down. With so many complex arguments and opinions, It's an incredible read.

Detractors : This man has made you HATE him. Consider that. You fear what he craves. It's disgusting, casting a shadow of malice over the community we hold so dear, the community we precariously balance on twigs of self righteousness and perceived decency. 

He's essentially fantasized about murder. It's like the movie "Feed", the nastiest BSDM stories, the dark recesses of the tortured human psyche, and this dude dreams about living it out. Remove the blinders and realize that this exists within humanity. The key here is the fantasy concept. If we were going to police everyone with a fantasy, we would be living in a dead world. There would be no artists or musicians. It's this human element that makes life interesting, the ability to create, metaphysically. 

This concept is all or nothing, it's impossible to govern the desires and creativity of man.

I myself have fantasized about rape. On more than one occasion. However like the OP I possess at least a decent mental state, allowing me to separate fantasy from reality. People you have illustrated here, people that do these things in real life, the Jeffrey Dahmers and Ed Geins of the world, they had one more fragile. It's a thin line that distinguishes one from another, a man can easily be pushed from the precipice. The thought is disturbing, but it's real and none of us can hide from it. 

You are made to hate this man because he brings it before you. You had to read it, and you despise who he is because of it. If these things had stayed chained away in the dark hearts of men and women, they wouldn't be a problem. It's only when your eyes are pried open and you have to look that you cannot handle it. A bit of the old ultraviolence.

Call me a sociopath, but this man had no rules telling him that he needed to govern his words. This is, as advertised, a site for adults. Maybe the truth is that this thread proves that not all of us are.

I doubt this thread will be closed, because the founder weighed in on it. 

So to speak. 

Hahahaha.


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## AnnMarie (Dec 3, 2007)

Ekim said:


> Except you keep bringing it up every time I respond to you. So, because I have qualms about abortions I'm suddenly against "women's rights" in general, even though I'm very liberal on almost every issue besides that? But whatever, this isn't Hyde Park.
> 
> And just so I'm clear on this, one can post literally anything weight-gain related on this board, even if it makes fellow members very uncomfortable and possibly cry, and no one's even allowed to criticize them for it? What a charming place we've got here.




Read Conrad's post. If you're unclear, take it up with him. 

AM without mod hat - just a member:
Him allowing this particular thread and discussion means nothing but exactly that, he's allowed this particular thread and discussion. 

The leaps and bounds being assumed on the behalf of others is what truly astounds me. Perhaps you're not all people who can be taken at your word, or who say it like it really is without veils and hidden agendas, but that isn't the case for everyone. 

Stop reading so much into things and simply concentrate on the reading.


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## ripley (Dec 3, 2007)

This is Conrad's house, and he says what goes...and he says that Anonymousfeeder has the right to expression of whatever fantasy he harbors. 

My question is..._*should*_ one share their darkest fantasies, especially when they are so illegal, immoral, and extreme as this one is? Isn't there danger in saying "No man, you're not a sicko, this is your turn on." 

I have a dark fantasy. I know it doesn't make me a bad person, but I would NEVER, ever seek to have it validated by others. I think that is a horrendously, stupendously, huge mistake. If you know something is wrong, you do not seek to have other people approve it. What do you gain by that, except another step towards trying to make that fantasy happen in real life?

The OP says he would never _really_ do this. It's just a fantasy. But in the next sentence he says he has constructed certain parts of his life as safeguards because this is so strong of an urge for him. That is a blatant, dangerous contradiction that is very scary.

Let me ask you this: will expressing this fantasy in a venue that is constructed to validate it do more harm to the OP than good? Is "celebrating" this part of himself a wise or good thing to do? I think the OP needs to fight against these urges. I think he should stop seeking out places to be able to type this and get an erection. I think he should fight against the bigger and bigger piece of his psyche it seems to be occupying. He should seek to control it rather than seek ways to find a brotherhood for it.

Yes, having dark fantasies is normal. Letting them have such a huge part of our souls and energy caught up in them is very, very dangerous. The biggest dog in the yard is the one you feed. Why does the OP keep wanting to feed this dog that he agrees is immoral, illegal, and murderous? 

If I knew a 15 year old boy who fantasized about taking a gun to school to kill teachers and classmates, no way would I ever shrug it off as "We all have dark fantasies, no big deal" or say "Don't worry dude, I've wanted to kill people before too." Would it be wise for this boy to seek out venues online of people who would tacitly or actively endorse/get off on his fantasy?

This is beyond fantasy for the OP. He seeks out ways to bring it into his real life, and talk about it. It ceases to be fantasy when you have to avoid things in your real life because you know it could get out of control. Then it's just a danger to others and a danger to your own soul.


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## Ample Pie (Dec 3, 2007)

Ekim said:


> Except you keep bringing it up every time I respond to you. So, because I have qualms about abortions I'm suddenly against "women's rights" in general, even though I'm very liberal on almost every issue besides that? But whatever, this isn't Hyde Park.
> 
> And just so I'm clear on this, one can post literally anything weight-gain related on this board, even if it makes fellow members very uncomfortable and possibly cry, and no one's even allowed to criticize them for it? What a charming place we've got here.



You keep bringing up your dislike for this post and that is my best example of how your posts can be equally distasteful to another poster. Mostly, I ignore what you post--I guess if you need more examples, I can start paying better attention. 

Also, you'll find that personal attacks and an outright attempt to hurt others will get you warned throughout the board, here too. This thread wasn't started as an attack on anyone or with the intent to hurt others. It was just an expression of a fantasy--therefore it doesn't fit your question above and your implication that it's okay to make someone cry is yet another strawman.


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## SocialbFly (Dec 3, 2007)

I told myself i was not going to come back to this thread, but sigh, here i am....


ok...mfdoom, you made a valid point, and i hate to admit it..a book on fantasies of women contained a common fantasy women have...that being rape...so, i can see why you said what you said, if you asked a woman, do you truly want to be raped, 99.9% of us say of course not...but the fantasy exists for so many reasons and i wont go into it now.

I think you hit the nail on the head. I know women don't want to be truly raped, but it is a common and well known fantasy, just like beastiality. 

I think you are right, when you said the OP posted something that is horrific and in your face and a horrible fear. Just like rape is to most women. 

The difference is, MOST fantasies don't lead to the death of the subject and that is where many here are having issues and the line drawn.

YES, without a doubt, being tied up, doing something against my will and being fed until i burst and die in a pile of my own making is in my face. I have the fear of someone torturing me until i die. Do i want to read it here? 

I read the post in the beginning, well, cause of all the stars and the graphic posting and yada yada well...nosieness...

but when it comes right down to it, while everyone has the right to share their fantasies, most people know some fantasies are best left unsaid, that is why although beastiality is a common fantasy among people, you havent seen any posts about fido and friend eating then doing unspeakable things. Some things are best left unsaid and that is where judgement is called in, and maturity.

Maybe that is what the truest issue is here.


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## NancyGirl74 (Dec 3, 2007)

Its kinda silly to tell everyone they need to be ok with this guys fantasies. He put them out there into the world wide web for the world wide web viewers to read. Surely he knew what he said would be commented on. If he didn't....well, duh. Asking people to be understanding is one thing. Telling them they have to act like everything he said is just peachy kind of defeats the purpose of commenting in a forum in the first place. Personally, I think he posted looking for a strong reaction otherwise he would have censored himself more. If he is ok with being so open why censor those responding to him.

Just my opinion.


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## Ample Pie (Dec 3, 2007)

No one needs to be okay with it, but it is appropriate to this forum, so people need to just live and let freaking live.


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## SocialbFly (Dec 3, 2007)

Rebecca said:


> No one needs to be okay with it, but it is appropriate to this forum, so people need to just live and let freaking live.




I am trying to decide if you truly feel the need to defend this person, or if you just like to fight for the sake of fighting. No one is being disrespectful....to him.

There are so many ethical and moral issues i could say here, but i am not looking to start a bigger issue than the OP started. 

What's the point?


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## Ample Pie (Dec 3, 2007)

SocialbFly said:


> I am trying to decide if you truly feel the need to defend this person, or if you just like to fight for the sake of fighting. No one is being disrespectful....to him.
> 
> There are so many ethical and moral issues i could say here, but i am not looking to start a bigger issue than the OP started.
> 
> What's the point?


you can think what you like, but my guess is that if you spent more time around this sub-forum, you'd know.

Besides, I'm not defending HIM just his right to share what he's shared here.


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## furious styles (Dec 3, 2007)

I meant more to defend his right to say it, I sort of came off more abrasive against those who think he doesn't have that right. My badz.


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## SocialbFly (Dec 3, 2007)

mfdoom said:


> I meant more to defend his right to say it, I sort of came off more abrasive against those who think he doesn't have that right. My badz.



mfdoom, i am not being a critic to your post at all, you made me think a little differently, and i appreciate it.


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## furious styles (Dec 3, 2007)

SocialbFly said:


> mfdoom, i am not being a critic to your post at all, you made me think a little differently, and i appreciate it.



I appreciate that. I just meant to clarify a little, throwing a different light on this is what I intended.


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## SoVerySoft (Dec 3, 2007)

LJ Rock said:


> ...Censorship on either side of the issue is unfair. That's just my opinion.



There has been no censorship. In this forum, there are rules that were broken, and they were enforced. 

There is a very heated discussion on this thread, and the topic in general, in a blog in the Clubhouse where the posts were not touched. So, really, there has been no censorship.

I also want to say that the OP did not put his fantasy out there as a personal ad or he would deserve the reactions he's been getting. He put it out to discuss the issue of him having the fantasies. Not to discuss the fantasies themselves.

Finally, here is another post by the OP from this morning. It got buried 2 pages back because it was in moderated status and I just saw it now to approve it.


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## stan_der_man (Dec 3, 2007)

Rebecca said:


> Then you be mindful of what affect your fantasies have on men in general.
> 
> Sheesh, people like you make it seem like men are after women, wanting them fat and unhealthy. And not JUST in fantasy, but in reality.
> 
> ...


I completely agree with you on the censorship issue, no question there. You may be right Rebecca, perhaps I'm placing harsher standards upon someone (AnonymousFeeder in this case...) who I don't agree with than I place upon myself... But, I don't think it can be argued that my views on fat admiration (basically middle of the road) effect those on the extremes (or fat people, or "extreme FAs") in such strong negative ways as how the views of the extreme effect us in the middle or even more mild than myself. As for the aggressive criticism which AnonymousFeeder has been receiving, I don't think this is simply because of utter disrespect for him, or his views, Perhaps if he were a bit more involved in this thread and articulated his views better, this thread may not have taken the tailspin that it has. There are aggressive critics out there no doubt, but AnonymousFeeder's views are on the extreme spectrum of FAism... I think criticism is to be expected to an extent. I'm not blaming you (AnonymousFeeder) for abandoning this thread... I did read your reasons for not being able to be present. There have been plenty of threads that went into tailspins much less controversial because the OPs didn't stick around to keep (or at least attempt) that from happening.


One thing I'm curious of... I'd like to post a question to AnonymousFeeder:

If you were able to find a partner who you admitted all of your fantasies to and this partner wasn't scared away by the extreme nature of these fantasies (and possibly even embraced these fantasies...) what sort of things would you attempt to do? You know, perhaps some sort of role playing scenario. Obviously it would have to be something which your partner survived... I think it's a fair question and certainly on topic. I'm honestly curious.


fa_man_stan

P.S. Rebecca I agree:
You are right... "extreme" is just further down the spectrum from where one happens to be standing...

One person's "extreme" may be another's middle ground.

I can only argue things from my viewpoint, that's my bias... Stan


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## SocialbFly (Dec 3, 2007)

"If you were able to find a partner who you admitted all of your fantasies to and this partner wasn't scared away by the extreme nature of these fantasies (and possibly even embraced these fantasies...) what sort of things would you attempt to do? You know, perhaps some sort of role playing scenario. Obviously it would have to be something which your partner survived... I think it's a fair question and certainly on topic."


Is this anything we need to know?


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## stan_der_man (Dec 3, 2007)

SocialbFly said:


> "If you were able to find a partner who you admitted all of your fantasies to and this partner wasn't scared away by the extreme nature of these fantasies (and possibly even embraced these fantasies...) what sort of things would you attempt to do? You know, perhaps some sort of role playing scenario. Obviously it would have to be something which your partner survived... I think it's a fair question and certainly on topic."
> 
> 
> Is this anything we need to know?



If the critics (myself included) are being fair to AnonymousFeeder, following the rules of this board, and AnonymousFeeder is actively part of this thread, then I'd like to hear what he has to say as repugnant as one may think that is... I'm just curious.


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## Webmaster (Dec 3, 2007)

Thank you all for your input. This discussion has gone around in circles, outliving its usefulness and I am now closing it. As for what goes in the future, it's a case by case, post by post situation. The rules here are to allow Freedom of Fantasy as related to this site, the lines of which will be reviewed when cases arise.


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