# So am I an FA?



## Amarillowave (Jan 19, 2010)

After reading a number of the threads here lately, i began to wonder: Am I an FA, really? and by whose definition?

Here's the background:

50yo definite hetero WM. Always liked(and dated) girls with large breasts. married a HF, 40D, 155lb, 30 years ago. Now she's 300lb and 46DD. My eyes still fixate on large breasts(including hers), most of which are found on fat women, but I've never really told anyone I prefer fat woman specifically, not even her. I've told her(as if she couldn't tell) how much I love large breasts, but not that i specifically like large breasts on a fat girl. I'm not sure she'd really appreciate it if I did. 


So, how do I fit in to the Dimensions universe? FA, yes, no, maybe?


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## James (Jan 19, 2010)

Amarillowave said:


> After reading a number of the threads here lately, i began to wonder: Am I an FA, really? and by whose definition?
> 
> Here's the background:
> 
> ...



If part of your physical attraction to your wife is specific to the fact that she is fat (and you say you prefer fat women so this seems to be the case), then you absolutely share a commonality with the FA/FFAs of dimensions. I don't think it matters how you self identify or whether you choose to adopt the label of FA or not? For some it empowers and for others it carries unwanted associations. Either way, I say you *do *fit into the Dimensions universe. Welcome to the FA/FFA forum


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## James (Jan 19, 2010)

As for considering your dilemma with telling your wife about liking her fat? 

That's a tough call to make. On the one hand, your liking of her large breasts is something that is an easily understandable quality. Large breasts fit into the social norms of female beauty so by you stating your liking of hers, you are not going to be challenging her relationship between her body, her self esteem derived from her appearance and her sense of how attractive she is. She may or may not like her large breasts but she will not be as threatened by the idea that you like them as she would likely be to hear that you find her fat body appealing. It varies from person to person but if you get a feeling that your wife would find this revelation threatening or difficult to take then you are likely to be right. A good way to start the dialogue (if you choose to start it), might be to preface anything you say with a re-iteration of how you have always been attracted to her. That you married her when she was smaller and that your attraction to her now is not 100% just because she is fat now... With this as a firm basis to the discussion, you _might _be able to introduce the idea that you actually find her even sexier than you used to.... Ultimately though, like I say, this is tricky and there are definite potential grenades that might go off... especially if you feel that the idea would just be too much to process for her... too out of synch with her own self image and how she wants to be seen.... If that's the case then I'd say its probably more respectful to hold your truth until a future point where you feel that she'd be more ok hearing it.


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## Gspoon (Jan 23, 2010)

Liking large bums is pretty much the same thing. I definitely cannot speak for every FA.

But being an FA means you like fat on a woman. In 1 place or in many. Loving really large breasts that are bigger than normal is a perfectly logical reasoning to consider you as an FA. I love women being big all over, but I know of FAs that love Bellies only, or Bums only, even breasts only. I guess you are and you aren't also. So, I guess you are not a term as much as you are you


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## dangerousjack (Jan 24, 2010)

i think it depend on how much you like / tolerate fat on the rest of her body


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## chicken legs (Jan 24, 2010)

Amarillowave said:


> After reading a number of the threads here lately, i began to wonder: Am I an FA, really? and by whose definition?
> 
> Here's the background:
> 
> ...



Idk....One of my brothers likes huge hooters too, but he doesn't like them to be fat anywhere else. He is more of a hard core "Breast Inflation" type guy. Usually, he gets skinny or really fit girls and gets them boob jobs if he gets married to them.


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## Teleute (Jan 24, 2010)

chicken legs said:


> Usually, he gets skinny or really fit girls and gets them boob jobs if he gets married to them.



Ummmm.... how often has this happened that you can describe it as "usually"?


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## chicken legs (Jan 24, 2010)

Teleute said:


> Ummmm.... how often has this happened that you can describe it as "usually"?



Well, twice so far..and now he is divored again... and thats not including the girlfriends inbetween...


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## MisterGuy (Jan 28, 2010)

Amarillowave said:


> After reading a number of the threads here lately, i began to wonder: Am I an FA, really? and by whose definition?
> 
> Here's the background:
> 
> ...



You're fifty, married to a 300 lb woman with huge boobs, and you're not sure if you're an FA? Also, how is it possible to be married to someone for thirty years and not discuss things like what kind of body type you prefer and that her fattyness and boobliness gives you wood?


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## Blockierer (Apr 22, 2010)

Amarillowave said:


> . My eyes still fixate on large breasts(including hers), most of which are found on fat women, but I've never really told anyone I prefer fat woman specifically, not even her. I've told her(as if she couldn't tell) how much I love large breasts, but not that i specifically like large breasts on a fat girl. I'm not sure she'd really appreciate it if I did.
> .


That's the old fat taboo thing, of course a man can be into gigantic knockers but being into fat rolls on the rest of the body is odd.
I wonder has your wife never seen in your eyes what type of woman you are attracted to? Never seen others in you as the udder edition? I doubt.


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## CastingPearls (Apr 22, 2010)

This is a really good question. I just had an interesting conversation with Spouse last night about the diversity of FA's. I've been a BBW my entire life and am also an FA but don't limit myself to them and he's dated some thin women but they were never sexually appealing to him. 

It wasn't until I came here to DIMS and was delighted to discover so much preference, fixation and fetish and wondered where he was as far as these things, what his thoughts were....and it's easier to pull teeth than get him to reveal anything but he said he likes bigger women. And that's it. 

And I have to admit I'm kind of disappointed. He's not interested in ANY of the things discussed here. Because sex is one of the things that is essential to my happiness and a whole new world has opened up to me I really don't know how to reconcile this to my relationship particularly since he's not really interested in anything I'd like to try. It makes me really sad.


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## exile in thighville (Jun 9, 2010)

get him to board here

as for the OP i don't think your orientation really matters when you've been monogamous for so long. if you're attracted to your wife's "current" body it's not a bad idea to tell her so.


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## StarWitness (Jun 9, 2010)

I think you're focusing too much on the numbers. There's no strict guidelines for defining who is a fat admirer and who isn't.

I think exile in thighville raises an interesting point... assuming you're in a monogamous relationship, why the concern about labeling yourself based on what kind of women you're not pursuing? If you're interested in being an ally to fat people on a social and/or political level, that's awesome, but your initial post seems to be pretty focused on physical attraction. And I'm sure that anyone in the audience who is monogamous and bisexual has at least two cents for me.  Not being snarky, I'm genuinely curious.


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## exile in thighville (Jun 10, 2010)

it's like a eunuch worrying that he's gay


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## Dr. Feelgood (Jun 10, 2010)

StarWitness said:


> why the concern about labeling yourself based on what kind of women you're not pursuing?



Better yet, why rely on others to define who you are? You're an FA if you think you're an FA.


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## LJ Rock (Jun 10, 2010)

If you want my advice: it's far less important you ask yourself whether you are an "FA" or not, than it is to ask yourself these questions: Do I love my wife? Am I attracted to my wife (even after her weight gain) and am I happy in my marriage? If the answer to any of those questions is "no" then you need to figure out why not and deal with it. If the answer to all of these questions is "yes" then you are a lucky man, and you should just be grateful for having a wonderful marriage and not worry about what label to slap on yourself. Just my opinion, hope it is helpful.


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## musicman (Jun 11, 2010)

Somehow I missed this thread when it first appeared. I agree with those who have said that the OP can define himself anyway he wishes (and that it probably doesn't matter since he's happily married), but I have to admit my first thought on reading his question was this:

Wow, this is great! FAs are now so cool that everybody wants to be one!


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## imfree (Jun 11, 2010)

musicman said:


> Somehow I missed this thread when it first appeared. I agree with those who have said that the OP can define himself anyway he wishes (and that it probably doesn't matter since he's happily married), but I have to admit my first thought on reading his question was this:
> 
> Wow, this is great! FAs are now so cool that everybody wants to be one!



I was FA when FA wasn't cool(since 1968!)!:bow::happy:

I Was Country........-Barbara Mandrell
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NN50...88FC9756&playnext_from=PL&playnext=1&index=52

Yah, it's true, most people think FA'ism is
just as corny as country music.

I'm still a fool for a country song if it 
tells an interesting story or gives a
valuable life's-lesson-"Lord, please 
forgive me, I have done wrong, I've lived 
my life like a bad country song" I'll write
that "Bad Country Song" one day, just
watch me, hahaha!!!


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## Weirdo890 (Jun 11, 2010)

Amarillowave said:


> After reading a number of the threads here lately, i began to wonder: Am I an FA, really? and by whose definition?
> 
> Here's the background:
> 
> ...



I say you fit in here. How you feel will take some soul-searching, but I say welcome to the club. Dimensions is all about acceptance (or is supposed to be).


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## escapist (Jun 18, 2010)

Amarillowave said:


> After reading a number of the threads here lately, i began to wonder: Am I an FA, really? and by whose definition?
> 
> Here's the background:
> 
> ...



I can relate, my girl was a 42F, sooooooo yeah. Hard to get that without some kind of belly. I actually get a little upset when BBW's try to cover there belly during sex, even if its in a porn lol. I like sexy rock hard abs too, but if she's got a belly I want her to be sexy with it, and show it off hehehe...I guess thats how I know I'm FA & bisizual.


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## Heyyou (Jun 19, 2010)

Amarillowave said:


> After reading a number of the threads here lately, i began to wonder: Am I an FA, really? and by whose definition?
> 
> Here's the background:
> 
> ...




you are a breast man nothing wrong with that. i dont think you are a fa, you just like big breasts and some thickness. fat admirers like all kinds of fat especially those immobile women with hanging bellies. it just happens that your wife got fat on you but you still love her anyway.


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## joswitch (Jun 22, 2010)

Amarillowave said:


> After reading a number of the threads here lately, i began to wonder: Am I an FA, really? and by whose definition?
> 
> Here's the background:
> 
> ...



Sounds like you're a "bisizual" FA (you like thinnish girls with big boobs too)...

As for your wife: 
1) Sounds like you lucked out on all points!
2) You're married, she probably never wants to hear about your attractions *in general*. She probably wants to hear about your attraction to her* in particular*.
3) Try this. In those moments of post-coital bliss, give her a big full body hug and tell her "Damn, I love your body, you're so hot!"
If she comes back with "Oh, you're just saying that / you can't mean it cos I'm fat".
you can reply "No, really, I love ALL of you. Every inch and ounce. You turn me on like crazy!" 
Now hug her and kiss her again. 

Or words to that effect.
And that should cover it.
Job done.
You lucky, lucky dude.


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## superodalisque (Jun 22, 2010)

it doesn't matter if you're an FA or not as long as you are true to yourself. and, really there is no reason to tell a woman what you find attractive on women in general. most women really don't want to hear a long exposition on that. sounds like you've found exactly who and what you want. no need to over analyze. just tell her what you find attractive about her. sail on brother!


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