# I'm like a guy



## Amandy (Feb 23, 2010)

I've always been annoyed with men who hit on me, leer at me with lust, objectify, etc. But in my own female way, I've kind of been doing the same thing to fat guys, although most of the time they don't get it. The lusty looks, body checks, flirty smiles... and it's all objectification and purely physical. I imagine what it would be like to fuck them and I get so girl-boner-horny that I can't possibly be a "normal" female.

I'm not trying to say that women who are into washboard-ab-douchebags aren't ever horny, but this all-out orgasmo feeling when I see a verrrrry fat and handsome boy is SO compelling. And my non-FFA friends never seem to express those feelings for men except more on a theoretical level, like "I bet he's good in bed," but what does that mean? Who cares what his technique is? If he's a beautiful shade of obese, it's already a done deal. He's going to make me feel like a natural woman no matter what his moves are. 

Sometimes I think that fat boys are like a drug to me. And a drug I am vigilant to resist because I'm in a committed relationship. Which also feels like a man thing. My girlfriends who have athlete-ish boyfriends/husbands think that even imagining fucking some other dude is a form of cheating, and I'm thinking, "I do that daily, WTF kind of depraved chick am I?"

But seriously, is this what it's like to be a guy? 

Do any other FFAs feel like this? And if so, can we have a fat dude version of Hooters at least, please?


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## chicken legs (Feb 23, 2010)

LOL..yeah guys dont get me because I get primal when a man with meat on his bones is near...Shwing!..but I'm so horribly shy in person I usually end up acting like Garth. The funny thing is I'm really comfy around the washboard ab/model type guys and end up being a bit of a chatterbox.


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## djudex (Feb 23, 2010)

Amandy said:


> But seriously, is this what it's like to be a guy?



Pretty much, yeah. Welcome to the gentleman's club, please don't let your pipe ashes drop on the carpet, lunch today is bangers and mash with spotted dick for afters.


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## escapist (Feb 23, 2010)

Amandy said:


> I've always been annoyed with men who hit on me, leer at me with lust, objectify, etc. But in my own female way, I've kind of been doing the same thing to fat guys, although most of the time they don't get it. The lusty looks, body checks, flirty smiles... and it's all objectification and purely physical. I imagine what it would be like to fuck them and I get so girl-boner-horny that I can't possibly be a "normal" female.
> 
> I'm not trying to say that women who are into washboard-ab-douchebags aren't ever horny, but this all-out orgasmo feeling when I see a verrrrry fat and handsome boy is SO compelling. And my non-FFA friends never seem to express those feelings for men except more on a theoretical level, like "I bet he's good in bed," but what does that mean? Who cares what his technique is? If he's a beautiful shade of obese, it's already a done deal. He's going to make me feel like a natural woman no matter what his moves are.
> 
> ...



I'm gonna say yeah you are! Ok, sneak peek into chicken and I. This might be part of why we get along so well. We really tend to get each other in ways that few other people really could. We are both comfortable enough with who we are to let the other person be who they are and not judge it.

Hheheh sooooo yeah, we are both animals in our own way and its cool with us 


Oh and as djudex, welcome to the club and the first Round is on the Newbie :happy:


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## Amandy (Feb 23, 2010)

djudex said:


> Pretty much, yeah. Welcome to the gentleman's club, please don't let your pipe ashes drop on the carpet, lunch today is bangers and mash with spotted dick for afters.




Is this club located in the UK? That's a long trip over just to be another randy tosser


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## Esther (Feb 24, 2010)

Um... haha. As far as I'm aware, feelings like this are totally normal and not uncommon for either gender, regardless of their sexual preferences. Just not everyone talks about it, that's all. Some days I'm on fire for my entire shift at work because of some handsome customer that came in at the beginning of the day, but I just play it cool.


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## Ninja Glutton (Feb 24, 2010)

This thread is relevant to my interests.

But, seriously, sometimes I feel the exact opposite. I'll be walking down the street looking at gorgeous girls and I'll just fantasize wildly about cuddling with/sleeping next to/hanging out with them. My mind quickly wanders back to the sexabonanza that is the male mind, but I'm just sayin'.

I think it's wonderful that you have such carnal instincts for rubenesque men.


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## escapist (Feb 24, 2010)

Ninja Glutton said:


> This thread is relevant to my interests.
> 
> But, seriously, sometimes I feel the exact opposite. I'll be walking down the street looking at gorgeous girls and I'll just fantasize wildly about cuddling with/sleeping next to/hanging out with them. My mind quickly wanders back to the sexabonanza that is the male mind, but I'm just sayin'.
> 
> I think it's wonderful that you have such carnal instincts for rubenesque men.



Uhhhh WOW, that has NEVER happened to me. I can't even imagine what its like to just think, "Wow she's hot, I'd like to play a mean game of connect four and maybe just snuggle with her after we hang out". I really had no clue that even happened.




If I'm seriously attracted to someone it takes all my willpower to just be normal and not devour them like hot steak sandwich on a Saturday night. :eat2:


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## djudex (Feb 24, 2010)

Amandy said:


> Is this club located in the UK? That's a long trip over just to be another randy tosser



No it's just a hop, skip and a jump away up in Canada. Posh brown leather chairs, pipe stands and high speed computer access for all of your pervtastic needs :happy:

Oh and a great kitchen of course. Priorities and all that :eat1:


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## Melian (Feb 24, 2010)

escapist said:


> Uhhhh WOW, that has NEVER happened to me. I can't even imagine what its like to just think, "Wow she's hot, I'd like to play a mean game of connect four and maybe just snuggle with her after we hang out". I really had no clue that even happened.
> 
> 
> 
> If I'm seriously attracted to someone it takes all my willpower to just be normal and not devour them like hot steak sandwich on a Saturday night. :eat2:



I see where NG is coming from, except my mind never really wanders back to sex. Not to get too descriptive, but actual sex doesn't do a whole lot for me - I only do it for the guy's sake (and could probably be completely happy dating a guy who didn't have a penis....lol).

For >99% of men whom I think are hot, all I want to do is grope them, get into some fetishy, non-intercourse stuff, and then be on my way.  Despite being married, I have fantasies about various men/women all the time, and agree with Esther that it's pretty common/natural for most people.

To the OP: a fat-dude-Hooters would be great, as long as I could smack their asses and stare down their cleavage (they would have to have cleavage, right? employment prerequisite?) while they served me some low quality chicken wings.


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## Amandy (Feb 24, 2010)

djudex said:


> No it's just a hop, skip and a jump away up in Canada. Posh brown leather chairs, pipe stands and high speed computer access for all of your pervtastic needs :happy:
> 
> Oh and a great kitchen of course. Priorities and all that :eat1:



That's right, you have the Queen still on your cash, so you get to say things like bugger and wanker, ri?

I've been to Calgary though, you're more wild west than anglo saxe up there.


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## extra_fat_guy (Feb 24, 2010)

Melian said:


> To the OP: a fat-dude-Hooters would be great, as long as I could smack their asses and stare down their cleavage (they would have to have cleavage, right? employment prerequisite?) while they served me some low quality chicken wings.



Well if there was a place like that I would work there because I could use a good job. Ass smacking is optional if you tip good. lol.


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## SnapDragon (Feb 24, 2010)

Melian said:


> For >99% of men whom I think are hot, all I want to do is grope them, get into some fetishy, non-intercourse stuff, and then be on my way.



I'll second the fetishy non-intercourse stuff. When I look at a big fat sexy chap he hijacks my mind and I can't stop thinking about getting his clothes off and copping a feel and a taste. It's more an urge to indulge in someone else's body and let the other person indulge in mine than it is to have sex. I want to give this person an orgasm, and I want him to give me one.

I'm not sure if other people put as much emphasis on the actual sex as they do on the orgasm and the intimacy. I find actual ordinary penetrative sex overrated. I'm an open-minded person and I experiment a lot with that sort of thing, and having an orgasm with someone else by some other means is more intense. Wouldn't bother me either if a guy had no penis, so long as he has fingers and/or a tongue, and some kind of organ that he can use to achieve an orgasm with a bit of encouragement.


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## djudex (Feb 24, 2010)

Amandy said:


> I've been to Calgary though, you're more wild west than anglo saxe up there.



I'll have to admit I say howdy more often than wanker.

Does it feel strange knowing that you treat big fatties as lust objects and yet the same actions from men towards you invokes feelings of distaste? Is it all men objectifying you that creates this feeling i.e. if someone you were leering at leered back would you suddenly feel annoyed?

My curiosity has killed more cats than Schrodinger's box :bounce:


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## Paquito (Feb 24, 2010)

Guess I'm a girl then, cuz my mind never jumps to sex.


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## Isla620 (Feb 24, 2010)

Amandy said:


> Do any other FFAs feel like this?


Yes, absolutely. Guilty on all counts. I mentally undress pretty much every BHM I see. If I was an extrovert instead of the introvert I am, I might be downright predatory. I've even used the same phrasing about feeling/acting "like a guy" to describe it.


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## Amandy (Feb 24, 2010)

djudex said:


> I'll have to admit I say howdy more often than wanker.
> 
> Does it feel strange knowing that you treat big fatties as lust objects and yet the same actions from men towards you invokes feelings of distaste? Is it all men objectifying you that creates this feeling i.e. if someone you were leering at leered back would you suddenly feel annoyed?
> 
> My curiosity has killed more cats than Schrodinger's box :bounce:



Yes, hypocrisy comes to mind...

BUT! in my defense, I think my irritation with objectifying males is because it's always thinner dudes and never the guys I crush on

So, it's definitely not ALL men, it's just so rare for a big guy to come on to me. It's usually somedouchejagoff doing it. So good point - I would NEVER be irritated by being leered at by a BHM, but that happens like, um, almost never.

p.s. call me vanilla, but belly+penetration all the way


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## siren_ (Feb 24, 2010)

Amandy said:


> Sometimes I think that fat boys are like a drug to me. And a drug I am vigilant to resist because I'm in a committed relationship. Which also feels like a man thing. My girlfriends who have athlete-ish boyfriends/husbands think that even imagining fucking some other dude is a form of cheating, and I'm thinking, "I do that daily, WTF kind of depraved chick am I?"



I think some people just have a stronger sex drives that others. I mean I have lot of guy friends who feel something similar to what you described. Just because your female and you have strong urges doesn't mean that you're not normal. lol. As long as you have self control and don't act on impulse, I don't really think it's technically cheating. But on the other hand, the guy you're with should be so amazing and special that everyone else should just not be that appealing. 

When i see a nice healthy BHM I might get a nice smile on my face, but I don't really imagine doing him. Though i've had that thought randomly before, I thought everyone does at some point. >_<

Also, I think we need to raise money and open that bhm-hooters restaurant you mentioned...haha


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## CherryRVA (Feb 25, 2010)

Amandy, I don't think you're depraved. I think it's completely normal to have thought like this....hell I have them all the time. But I feel as long as I don't act on them, no it's not cheating. But then I guess this is how guys are and yeah, I have been accused of being tomboy-ish.

And yeah, I try to be gracious about leers, but really, it would be so nice if it were BHMs instead of d-bags.


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## escapist (Feb 25, 2010)

Ok question about the BHM Hooters, can it be scooter friendly for the SSBHM's so they don't hurt their backs?...and what exactly would the server uniforms look like?


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## agouderia (Feb 25, 2010)

Amandy said:


> But in my own female way, I've kind of been doing the same thing to fat guys, although most of the time they don't get it. The lusty looks, body checks, flirty smiles... and it's all objectification and purely physical. I imagine what it would be like to fuck them and I get so girl-boner-horny that I can't possibly be a "normal" female.
> 
> I'm not trying to say that women who are into washboard-ab-douchebags aren't ever horny, but this all-out orgasmo feeling when I see a verrrrry fat and handsome boy is SO compelling.
> 
> ...



.... you've read my story "5 courses" so you totally know I have this "problem", too  !

From my observations though it has less to do with being a guy or girl but more whether you are able to/want to let your physical reactions penetrate from your subconscious into your conscious thinking, and then on the conscious level acknowledge then, think about them and even .... well, have a good time expanding on them.

Whether someone does this or not depends IMO only in part on the strength of their physical responses - it has more to do with their structure of thinking, their self-reflection, their imagination, their ability of verbalizing feelings, their priorities, .... but also of course their upbringing, how much sexuality has been tabooed or not, how much is considered to be an integral part of an individual's personality. The latter is still - no matter how much sexual revolution we've gone through - much less the case for women; so many people - out of tradition, convention, moral rigour, biological ignorance, whatever - continue adhering to the traditional myth that men have a stronger sex drive than woman. 
(By the way, I think we women also shouldn't underestimate how underdeveloped, boring and inhibited the sex drive of many guys is!)

So - there is absolutely nothing wrong with you - your responses show your are a healthy, reflective, imaginative female - all wonderful things = stay just exactly the way you are! 

P.S.: Spent two hours yesterday evening swooning on the train next to a 140kg Italian business cutie who unfortunately was picked up at the train station by his "Mamma"!


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## Melian (Feb 25, 2010)

escapist said:


> Ok question about the BHM Hooters, can it be scooter friendly for the SSBHM's so they don't hurt their backs?...and what exactly would the server uniforms look like?



No scooters. Scooters are NOT HOT. For my dollar, because I am that important, I want hot men serving me food. 

Maybe they could just employ a lot of servers and keep them on quick rotations.


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## Esther (Feb 25, 2010)

I thought the whole idea that men have powerful sexual urges and women don't had been dispelled as an outdated, misogynist myth in this day and age.


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## LillyBBBW (Feb 25, 2010)

Amandy said:


> Yes, hypocrisy comes to mind...
> 
> *BUT! in my defense, I think my irritation with objectifying males is because it's always thinner dudes and never the guys I crush on*
> 
> ...



Yeah, that's pretty much how I feel too. I rarely get asked out but recently I abandoned my home lair to meet a nice young guy for late lunch. Guy in question is a hard wired FA and I, naturally, a hard wired fattie who also happens to be an FFA. This guy is short and slight and when I got up to skip off to the loo, my belly was at eye level and I thought he was going to have a seizure. In my fantasies this is always a really sexy thing but it SO wasn't at that moment. I felt uncomfortable and self concious. When I returned from the ladies room he quickly moved to the chair next to me and became very affectionate, touchy feely and such. I was like a wet rag sitting there. He's a nice guy and all but I just wasn't feeling him at all. 

We're both facing the TV and watching the game, he's rubbing my back which feels nice but that's about all. I'm contemplating my circumstances when one of the hottest fat guys I've ever seen walks in, goes to the bar, sits down, bares his plumber's crack and orders a drink. I thought I was going to die. I'm sitting there with a nice guy, very out about his prefference, attractive by worldly standards who's hot for me and it was like he was invisible. Nice. Fat guy couldn't pick me out of a lineup at gunpoint I'm sure. *sigh* It's a sick sad world.


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## That Guy You Met Once (Feb 25, 2010)

First, as a chubby guy, let me say:

SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

Ok. Now that's out of my system, you should know that there's nothing wrong with what you do. In my opinion: your sex drive is just motivated by your real interests, as opposed to who/how other people think you should be fucking, and although it may be a little more overactive than usual - that's just the way you are. You probably enjoy it more than most.

Also - most relationships begin with physical attraction. (The rest begin with lust for someone's power, money, or reputation - much worse than physical attraction, IMO.) 

You can't be truly emotionally familiar with someone until at least several weeks of talking to them regularly - and physical attraction is usually what gives you the initiative to do that.

"Fantasizing about fucking another guy is cheating?" What bullshit. Actually doing it is cheating.*
Since you fantasize about sex, just make sure that anyone you date knows that.

* But I'm polyamorous, so my opinion doesn't count for much on matters of fidelity.


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## Paquito (Feb 25, 2010)

Esther said:


> I thought the whole idea that men have powerful sexual urges and women don't had been dispelled as an outdated, misogynist myth in this day and age.



This bears repeating.


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## chicken legs (Feb 25, 2010)

Esther said:


> I thought the whole idea that men have powerful sexual urges and women don't had been dispelled as an outdated, misogynist myth in this day and age.



Only in text books and media..and thats just in industrialized countries.


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## escapist (Feb 25, 2010)

Esther said:


> I thought the whole idea that men have powerful sexual urges and women don't had been dispelled as an outdated, misogynist myth in this day and age.



Once upon a time I had a friend who made his wife crazy because she tried everything to get him to get her pregnant. From dressing up to just launching and all out sex assault on him. He's a great guy, a nice guy, a very intelligent guy, he just has little or no interest such things. For those of us who are nothing like that, its hard to wrap our minds around what its like to be so different. Don't confuse wonderment and amazement with disbelief.



Melian said:


> No scooters. Scooters are NOT HOT. For my dollar, because I am that important, I want hot men serving me food.
> 
> Maybe they could just employ a lot of servers and keep them on quick rotations.



Hummm so perhaps Massage Chairs in the buser/server stations? Humm I'm down with that!


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## Isla620 (Feb 25, 2010)

Esther said:


> I thought the whole idea that men have powerful sexual urges and women don't had been dispelled as an outdated, misogynist myth in this day and age.



There ARE differences, though, and I don't think they can be completely ignored. The latest stats I've seen are that 54% of men report that they think about sex every day or several times a day, while only 19% of women report the same.* A high sex drive in a woman is normal, certainly, but it is clearly not "the norm."

The more interesting question to me is: Are FFAs more likely to be in that 19% than non-FFAs?

*Source: "Sex in America: A Definitive Survey," which was published back in 1994 as sort of an update to the famous Kinsey Reports.


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## extra_fat_guy (Feb 25, 2010)

escapist said:


> Hummm so perhaps Massage Chairs in the buser/server stations? Humm I'm down with that!



And they should provide us with good shoes so are feet don't hurt, or just allow us to sit with our customers.


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## escapist (Feb 25, 2010)

extra_fat_guy said:


> And they should provide us with good shoes so are feet don't hurt, or just allow us to sit with our customers.



Oh man I would be so bad! I used to get in trouble because I would socialize with the customers "to much". I always got good tips so I don't think I over did it. That would be cool to have a seat at the table lol.


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## RentonBob (Feb 25, 2010)

escapist said:


> Oh man I would be so bad! I used to get in trouble because I would socialize with the customers "to much". I always got good tips so I don't think I over did it. That would be cool to have a seat at the table lol.


The girls at Hooters sit at the table with you and take your order so, why not us too


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## mischel (Feb 25, 2010)

escapist: Wouldn't we both get in trouble because we eat our customers food while sitting at their tables?


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## Amandy (Feb 25, 2010)

In the back of my head, when I posted this, I kind of thought that these sexual musings of mine (the question of whether my FFA-ness is what makes me on the hornier side of the sexual spectrum) could devolve into some socio vs biological argument over how women measure up against men; it's such a multi faceted/layered/convoluted discussion, and quite frankly, my staunch feminism still wont let me throw out the evolutionary baby with the Kinsey bathwater. Social progress ain't got nothin on the power of biology when it's part of the equation.

I guess I was really just exploring observations among the women I know, most of whom you'd think would be smart/educated enough to know better, but still seem to fall comfortably into the traditional role of being turned on through feelings and emotions and so rarely are constantly plagued by the desire for a hot lay. Throwing the misogyny word around is kinda hyperbole here.

I'd add that I've never cheated and have made a commitment to be monogamous, but I sometimes wonder if deep down I'd be polyamorous under the right circumstances (i.e. with a like-minded partner).

And if this made no sense, it's because I can't concentrate, I have youtube belly porn on the other side of my screen.


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## shhtx1970 (Feb 25, 2010)

Amandy said:


> In the back of my head, when I posted this, I kind of thought that these sexual musings of mine (the question of whether my FFA-ness is what makes me on the hornier side of the sexual spectrum) could devolve into some socio vs biological argument over how women measure up against men; it's such a multi faceted/layered/convoluted discussion, and quite frankly, my staunch feminism still wont let me throw out the evolutionary baby with the Kinsey ...
> 
> ... Throwing the misogyny word around is kinda hyperbole here.
> 
> ...



BLAH BLAH ... you are over thinking it. Besides too many words here and I have to look up even though I finished college :doh: my brain does not like this pycho babble when it comes to human excitement. I am gonna put it to you plain and simple. You like BIG guys and you get excited. Doesnt matter how you try to justify it you just do. People have this excitement all the time but varies in degree as in what, ie some people love chocolate over sex, some people like Titties over the ass (hmmmm, titties over another girl's ass ... whoops I got distracted) anyways keep it simple. 

Amandy, guys that don't respond to you don't respond mainly because they are shy and also, we don't get hit upon by women as a common thing. I personally haven't got much of any looks or anything from women and if I do its like more of a look of disgust. So I just keep going forward with my job and duties and doing what I need to do ignoring people who look down on my big-ness. I will admit this, I was once hit upon at bar from a woman but I just looked at her and saw her friends and realize it was prank so that got me to put up my defenses and just play stupid so she leave me alone and she saw I was not going to play her game so she walked back to her friends as they giggled. Some of us have had bad experiences so when a woman comes up to us and starts to flirt we just lock up as a defense because sadly others have ruin the ability to distinguish genuine sincerity with people who hide their rudeness with sweet talk.

Now here is something funny I heard on the radio and read (article) recently, women who are considered overweight get more sex than skinny women.


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## escapist (Feb 25, 2010)

mischel said:


> escapist: Wouldn't we both get in trouble because we eat our customers food while sitting at their tables?



ROFL, Please the Sign will be posted at the entrance! "*Feeding the waiters is part of the gratuity and is included in the price.*"


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## escapist (Feb 25, 2010)

Amandy said:


> In the back of my head, when I posted this, I kind of thought that these sexual musings of mine (the question of whether my FFA-ness is what makes me on the hornier side of the sexual spectrum) could devolve into some socio vs biological argument over how women measure up against men; it's such a multi faceted/layered/convoluted discussion, and quite frankly, my staunch feminism still wont let me throw out the evolutionary baby with the Kinsey bathwater. Social progress ain't got nothin on the power of biology when it's part of the equation.
> 
> I guess I was really just exploring observations among the women I know, most of whom you'd think would be smart/educated enough to know better, but still seem to fall comfortably into the traditional role of being turned on through feelings and emotions and so rarely are constantly plagued by the desire for a hot lay. Throwing the misogyny word around is kinda hyperbole here.
> 
> ...



I've said it before and I'll say it again. Attraction isn't a choice. It happens on a sub-surface layer. It can be be communicated without choosing to. You can't rationalize, "Well I should be attracted to this or that". Just as guys can't buy affection or "win" your heart. You are either going to feel it or not. I kind of think its cool that you see the logical side of things yet recognize that biology doesn't care what you think, it only cares what you feel.

As for the polyamorous possibility's, you wouldn't really be the first. There are even some here on this board you probably just don't know about.

We are a diverse group here on the board. Sometimes we don't get along all the time, but in the end we are here because we are (F)FA's or the ones that (F)FA's Love...(heheh and some of us are both).


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## StarWitness (Feb 26, 2010)

Isla620 said:


> The more interesting question to me is: Are FFAs more likely to be in that 19% than non-FFAs?]



Maybe it would be fair to say that FFAs are more likely to have actively explored their sexuality? 

I'm looking at it like this: the image that we're given of an Attractive Man by 99% of media sources is that of a slim guy. But instead of just accepting the norm as the truth, we've realized that's not the truth for us, accepted that, and are willing to say "He's nice and all, but I'd rather get busy with Tubbs McGee over there."

This isn't to say that there aren't repressed FFAs, or that non-FFAs aren't in touch with their own sexuality, but it's at least been my experience that one has to make an active attempt to know her own desires to realize that she doesn't want what's presupposed.


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## Tracii (Feb 26, 2010)

A fat guy Hooters?I would eat there ALL the time!!
I don't think that fantasizing about wanting to do every BHM you like the looks of is wrong in any way.
I was in the parking lot of a Lowe's store a few weeks ago and as I was walking in a BHM whistled as I walked by his pick up truck so I glanced back and yes he was very nice looking so I smiled and gave him a wave he smiled back.
I was so hoping he was on his way in because I was wanting to check out his hot enormous body.
Is that cheating hell no its just I like looking at BHM's


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## desertcheeseman (Feb 26, 2010)

shhtx1970 said:


> Amandy, guys that don't respond to you don't respond mainly because they are shy and also, we don't get hit upon by women as a common thing. I personally haven't got much of any looks or anything from women and if I do its like more of a look of disgust.



I think it's just as hard for a fat man to accept compliments and flirtation about their bodies as it is for women. I remember being mercilessly teased by girls when I was in high school, and being led on to believe that I was something special to someone who turned out just to be leading me on as a gag for her friends. It's been very hard for me to open up to the concept that I could arouse physical lust in the female gender just for looking the way I look. Throughout my entire adult life, I've shied away from women who thought I was cute because I was afraid they might have other reasons for flirting with me than genuine attraction. And I've tried so hard to impress women who were indifferent about my size with my personality, my willingness to please, my rapier wit, my sense of humor, my career success, etc., all the while trying to deny my size and my sexuality. And then when the relationships didn't work out, I didn't chalk it up to not being a good physical match... I think I "didn't try hard enough." I think it's all about me instead of all to do with this crazy thing called love that just can't be forced, and resists all attempts to try. So I ended up trying harder and harder until I got burned out and women no longer respected me because I didn't respect myself.

If I had realized that a woman could want me for my body, I would have felt a lot more comfortable being myself with that woman, because at least, if nothing else, we would have that connection. I would go with what was in my heart and let the other things flow naturally through that instead of forcing them in an attempt to impress her. I credit the BHM/FFA forum (and a few very understanding friends) for showing me that I can be attractive just the way I am, that women can be just as attracted to the physical as men can, and knowing that when I do receive positive attention about my looks, I can accept it with grace and respond according to my desires instead of constantly worrying what their ulterior motives might be. 

Actually, I am not insulted at all at the thought that a woman might see me as a sex object. I find it a refreshing change after a lifetime of discrimination and self-loathing, and after thousands of years of men treating women like sex objects, turnabout is fair play. If there were such a thing as a BHM Hooters, I'd seriously consider applying


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## TallFatSue (Feb 26, 2010)

djudex said:


> Pretty much, yeah. Welcome to the gentleman's club, please don't let your pipe ashes drop on the carpet, lunch today is bangers and mash with spotted dick for afters.


I seem to be "like a guy" in this way. The farther I've advanced up the company ladder, the fewer women are around me. I'm one of the few women in management, and some of the other managers have said they consider me "one of the guys". I don't know whether to be insulted or just roll my eyes. I know my size is an advantage in certain situations (I'm tall too) because it helps me be assertive without being considered a "pushy broadie." Maybe that desexes me around the gold old boys? I do know I've heard more than enough "women jokes" for my lifetime (um, hello, woman sitting right here; so this is what it's like to be a fly on the wall, except I seem to be hidden in plain sight). Annoying! Well, whatever the reasons, I do enjoy my job, but to be safe I've told my husband to hit me with a log if I pick up too many "male" mannerisms, like talking about football or smoking a pipe. Meanwhile I'll just carry on and try to demonstrate that in many cases the best man for the job is a woman. 


djudex said:


> No it's just a hop, skip and a jump away up in Canada. Posh brown leather chairs, pipe stands and high speed computer access for all of your pervtastic needs :happy:
> 
> Oh and a great kitchen of course. Priorities and all that :eat1:


Gee, it's pretty comfy here after all. :eat2:


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## Amandy (Feb 26, 2010)

shhtx1970 said:


> BLAH BLAH ... you are over thinking it. Besides too many words here and I have to look up even though I finished college :doh: my brain does not like this pycho babble when it comes to human excitement. I am gonna put it to you plain and simple. You like BIG guys and you get excited. Doesnt matter how you try to justify it you just do. People have this excitement all the time but varies in degree as in what, ie some people love chocolate over sex, some people like Titties over the ass (hmmmm, titties over another girl's ass ... whoops I got distracted) anyways keep it simple.



 Well, there's always your charm to fall back on when all else fails...

I wasn't really trying to justify anything. I'm not running around with a guilt cloud over my head for my tastes and desires; I'm relatively "out," so to speak. It was just a curiosity if more FFA women had these same feelings of feeling sexually different from our non-FFA peers, beyond just the fat part to more of the extremely horny part.

I'm lucky to know a small group of FFA women quite well who have shared similar feelings with me over the last couple of years - but I've been so obsessed by these thoughts lately I felt like casting a wider net to a larger community of FFAs (and BHMs) who have shown some interesting thoughts and perspectives here.

Thanks again to all


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## SnapDragon (Feb 27, 2010)

TallFatSue said:


> I seem to be "like a guy" in this way.



I like your avatar. The red lighting on those smooth rolls of flab puts me in mind of lava flowing slowly down the side of a volcano. :-D


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## That Guy You Met Once (Feb 27, 2010)

Isla620 said:


> ... while only 19% of women *report* the same.*



I don't trust most people to be honest about their sex drive in public.

Plus, you'd have to take demographics into consideration. I don't think a 70 year old who's been married half her life would have the same results as a single 20-something.


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## rabbitislove (Mar 6, 2010)

Esther said:


> I thought the whole idea that men have powerful sexual urges and women don't had been dispelled as an outdated, misogynist myth in this day and age.



Uh, have I told you lately that I love you? :wubu:

Unfortunatly it hasn't. Im a ho bag fo lyfe.


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## Zowie (Mar 7, 2010)

I'll have to admit, my first reaction to seeing someone attractive is sex. Of course it is, why would I be wondering if he enjoys playing scrabble as a first thought?
And for the study, I definitely think of sex more than 19 times  It's more of a constant stream. (Raging hormones still?)

Funny, that's what a boyfriend of mine blamed his weight gain on. "I have sex, I tired out, and that makes me hungry. Fat people must have a hellofalot of great sex." Maybe it's the same for women?


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## escapist (Mar 7, 2010)

bionic_eggplant said:


> I'll have to admit, my first reaction to seeing someone attractive is sex. Of course it is, why would I be wondering if he enjoys playing scrabble as a first thought?
> And for the study, I definitely think of sex more than 19 times  It's more of a constant stream. (Raging hormones still?)
> 
> Funny, that's what a boyfriend of mine blamed his weight gain on. "*I have sex, I tired out, and that makes me hungry. Fat people must have a hellofalot of great sex.*" Maybe it's the same for women?



Uhhhhh No comment :blush: :happy:


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## MasterShake (Mar 8, 2010)

Isn't it the Italians that have some sort of proverb that you can judge a man's sexual qualities by how healthy his appetite is at the table?

Or am I just trying to justify my love of pasta and pesto??? :eat2:


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## rabbitislove (Mar 8, 2010)

MasterShake said:


> Isn't it the Italians that have some sort of proverb that you can judge a man's sexual qualities by how healthy his appetite is at the table?
> 
> Or am I just trying to justify my love of pasta and pesto??? :eat2:



Justify away. Im half Sicilian and make a meaaaaan eggplant parm 

I also enjoy sex.

That is all.


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## chicken legs (Mar 9, 2010)

MasterShake said:


> Isn't it the Italians that have some sort of proverb that you can judge a man's sexual qualities by how healthy his appetite is at the table?
> 
> Or am I just trying to justify my love of pasta and pesto??? :eat2:



Hehehe...Its good to know I'm not the only one who gauges the sexual abilites of a person via their appetite.:eat2:


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## agouderia (Mar 9, 2010)

MasterShake said:


> Isn't it the Italians that have some sort of proverb that you can judge a man's sexual qualities by how healthy his appetite is at the table?
> 
> Or am I just trying to justify my love of pasta and pesto??? :eat2:



The Italians actually have 2 versions of this proverb:

The short one is
_"Amare como mangiare"_
= somebody loves like he eats

the more elaborate one is

_"Un huomo non pùo pensare bene, amare bene se non ha mangiato bene"_
= A man cannot think well, love well if he has not eaten well

Most of us girls will appreciate that good loving mostly has a lot to do with good thinking 

And yes, from my experience ... a guy who knows good food, has a good appetite will mostly also know much better what is good in other sensual realms of life, too ....


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## MasterShake (Mar 9, 2010)

rabbitislove said:


> Justify away. Im half Sicilian and make a meaaaaan eggplant parm
> 
> I also enjoy sex.
> 
> That is all.


I WANT TO GO TO THERE. :eat2: 



chicken legs said:


> Hehehe...Its good to know I'm not the only one who gauges the sexual abilites of a person via their appetite.:eat2:


Hey, my dinner's up HERE!

...or would that be "down THERE!"??? :eat1:



agouderia said:


> The Italians actually have 2 versions of this proverb:


Moar Italian please!


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## taobear (Jul 3, 2010)

Amandy said:


> I've always been annoyed with men who hit on me, leer at me with lust, objectify, etc. But in my own female way, I've kind of been doing the same thing to fat guys, although most of the time they don't get it. The lusty looks, body checks, flirty smiles... and it's all objectification and purely physical. I imagine what it would be like to fuck them and I get so girl-boner-horny that I can't possibly be a "normal" female.
> 
> I'm not trying to say that women who are into washboard-ab-douchebags aren't ever horny, but this all-out orgasmo feeling when I see a verrrrry fat and handsome boy is SO compelling. And my non-FFA friends never seem to express those feelings for men except more on a theoretical level, like "I bet he's good in bed," but what does that mean? Who cares what his technique is? If he's a beautiful shade of obese, it's already a done deal. He's going to make me feel like a natural woman no matter what his moves are.
> 
> ...


 

I just have one question. Where in the hell have you ladies been all my life. My libido was never that strong but I have seen women that did things to me sometimes it ruins my whole day or week. So yes that's the way guys think. I'm more of a pleaser than taker but I think about making a woman remember me years later. Oh well. Where are you wonderful FFAs that will give me a chance at this


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## flinflam (Jul 9, 2010)

Amandy said:


> I've always been annoyed with men who hit on me, leer at me with lust, objectify, etc. But in my own female way, I've kind of been doing the same thing to fat guys, although most of the time they don't get it. The lusty looks, body checks, flirty smiles... and it's all objectification and purely physical. I imagine what it would be like to fuck them and I get so girl-boner-horny that I can't possibly be a "normal" female.
> 
> I'm not trying to say that women who are into washboard-ab-douchebags aren't ever horny, but this all-out orgasmo feeling when I see a verrrrry fat and handsome boy is SO compelling. And my non-FFA friends never seem to express those feelings for men except more on a theoretical level, like "I bet he's good in bed," but what does that mean? Who cares what his technique is? If he's a beautiful shade of obese, it's already a done deal. He's going to make me feel like a natural woman no matter what his moves are.
> 
> ...



Yeah that's pretty much what we think about. The only reason we watch sports, drink, or have any hobby is to just be normal for a few hours. So turn on a football game, grab a drink, and fire up that belt sander cause you've officially become a dude in training! After 6 months probation you'll receive your penis.


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## ~da rev~ (Jul 9, 2010)

Amandy said:


> I get so girl-boner-horny



What a fantastic expression! I actually had a LOL. :bow:


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## Amandy (Jul 9, 2010)

okay, can we please put this thread away now? I was buzzed and horny. I'm still horny, but trying to put any possible reference to sociocultural nature/nurture bullshit to bed - because if you haven't noticed lately, it prompts some really booooring and doucheposeur action around here.

p.s. I like sports but a belt sander would break a nail, so thankfully my 'gina will remain intact


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## BigChaz (Jul 9, 2010)

Amandy said:


> okay, can we please put this thread away now? I was buzzed and horny. I'm still horny, but trying to put any possible reference to sociocultural nature/nurture bullshit to bed - because if you haven't noticed lately, it prompts some really booooring and doucheposeur action around here.
> 
> p.s. I like sports but a belt sander would break a nail, so thankfully my 'gina will remain intact



Hey how you doin'


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## oranges (Jul 10, 2010)

I have heard this from a lot of FFAs... maybe women with extra sex drive are more inclined to the bigger men

my libido is definitely higher than my "normal" friends 



Amandy said:


> a beautiful shade of obese



why have i not heard this amazing phrase before?


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