# FA 'tells'



## Tad (Jul 14, 2014)

First, using 'tell' in the poker sense of the word, meaning something you do that gives away your feelings or thoughts.

second, an anecdote.

A few days ago, at an outdoor concert, I noticed a pear-shaped, smaller BBW standing with her (boyfriend/fiancée/husband/whatever), a little way in front of where I was standing with my pear shaped, smaller BBW wife. The music was good, but the group wasnt all that visually compelling so I was people watching on and off, and so it was that a bit later I noticed he had his arm around her, his hand on her upper arm just below the tip of the shoulder, fingers on the thickest part of the arm, palm more on the soft area at the back and maybe on that soft area on the side just below the armpit. Well, I corrected myself, I often put my arm to pretty much that exact spot, in part for those reasons, but it could be coincidence, right?

A while later Im looking around again, and how his arm is angled down somewhat awkwardly, so that his hand is right about where the softness of love handles starts, still mostly on the back, but just a little bit more toward the side than where you would be on the firmer part of the buttock. 

OK, this could be coincidence again, but 2-for-2 he goes for prime FA spots, plus the size of the woman he is with in the first place, I became pretty convinced that he was an FA.

Then a couple days later, at another concert, a gorgeously coiffed, groomed, and dressed BBW happened to be standing with her guy a little way in front of us. And in due course, he puts his arm around her, resting his hand in that exact spot again. Im thinking Wow, spotting two FAs in a few days, pretty cool. I feel like Im getting FADAR or something.

Then, as I reached my arm around my wife, to rest it on that point where the softness of love handles just begins, I thought .and I wonder how many people have made me over the years, from the exact same behaviors?

So finally the question: fellow FA (of either gender)do you have any tells (as they say in poker) that you think would give you away as an FA to the educated observer? (other than, you know, always dating a fat person, hugging them frequently, and telling people that you prefer fat partners..Im talking the more subtle things here. Im just meaning this topic in fun, mostly a way of laughing at ourselves for being predictable, but if you want to get into deep analysis, go ahead).

For that matter, non-FA who have observed FA tells, I guess you might have even better answers


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## Amaranthine (Jul 14, 2014)

Heh, I like this idea. 

Partly because I'm guilty of the same hand placement. If my arm is around someone, my hand is always on that love-handle area. With my fingers pushed in a little more than they probably need to be, with occasional active groping. Sometimes I'll put my other hand around, to be rested somewhere on the stomach area. 

It's worse in restaurants. If luckily placed in a booth setup, I'll probably have migrated to the other side of the booth by the end of the meal, for cuddling-into-side and some light stomach rubbing. At times, I've consented to "sharing" a dessert, even though I'm never actually interested in dessert (which is telling if someone notices that I only have maybe, 2 teaspoons...and then pick up the slack of the other person doesn't want to finish it. I'm not going to waste dessert.) 

More of a private-oriented "tell". Uh, I dated someone with a house, and he rented out rooms to other people going to our school. One day, one of the girls came in and started talking to him, and didn't know I was in the room because he was sitting on top of me. She was shocked when I said hi to her, and burst out laughing


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## ODFFA (Jul 15, 2014)

Similarly, my former mother-in-law used to chide me for always letting my ex have the leftovers off my plate (I wasn't what you'd call 'thin' back then either).

Another 'tell' for anyone that knew us relatively well..... Curbs can be terribly narrow in England, especially in the smaller towns, but I would invariably walk with my arm around him - curb permitting. My ex-husband is blind, so this was never quite _the_ most effective way of leading him around. But it was effective enough that I could get away with not denying myself some love handle action, rather often for our situation. (He would also have his cane in hand so people knew to stay out of our way.)

And I'm pretty sure I've given public side-hugs when it felt socially acceptable, allowing my hand to linger on the tummy for just a few seconds after pulling away. That could be a 'tell' to someone observant enough.


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## lucca23v2 (Jul 15, 2014)

hmm.. funny I never gave it a second though, but I had 2 friends in college, a female and a male that always wound up with their heads on my thighs or stomach at the end of the night. When our group would crash after clubbing, it was always those two that basically slept on top of me.

Come to think of it.. they are both married to bbw/bhms


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## lille (Jul 16, 2014)

I definitely have a tendency to rest my hand on love handles.


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## loopytheone (Jul 17, 2014)

Hmmm... I think my tells would probably be my total awkwardness and idiocy around bigger guys! I tend to either stare awkwardly for too long, avoid eye contact, and ramble away... but those are only things that you would notice if you knew me, I guess. I get the horrible feeling that a lot of big guys think I am being awkward because I am trying to be polite and not offend them rather than because I like what I see! 

Come to think of it, I figured out my ex was into bigger girls before he did. I guess there must have been some tells... I think the main one for me was how he liked to rest his hand on my stomach and just stroke and pet it.


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## GamerGainerGirl (Aug 6, 2014)

This was pretty funny to see that others notice these things! I always get self conscious because my fiancé will grope rolls on various parts of me when he has his arm around me in public. Or will do a quick playful tummy grab (I'm ticklish) so that I squirm and laugh. I always feel weird about it because I wonder wha other people think, and if it makes them uncomfortable. 
I always wondered if I'm the only one who people watches for those types of things xP


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## Tad (Aug 6, 2014)

GamerGainerGirl said:


> This was pretty funny to see that others notice these things! I always get self conscious because my fiancé will grope rolls on various parts of me when he has his arm around me in public. Or will do a quick playful tummy grab (I'm ticklish) so that I squirm and laugh. I always feel weird about it because I wonder wha other people think, and if it makes them uncomfortable.
> I always wondered if I'm the only one who people watches for those types of things xP



I think a lot of it is the 'red car effect' (if you buy a red car, you start noticing how many other red cars are on the road because you are primed to notice red cars, or so the theory goes). Most people probably wouldn't notice anything unusual, unless they are are particularly alert to the touching of fat bits


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## BigFA (Aug 6, 2014)

I suppose my "tell" may be a little more obvious, but whenever I hug a female family member or close friend, my hands start on their sides and I love to gently caress the fat that encircles their waist and then caress the fat on their back briefly in an act of affection. No one has ever complained or glared at me and everyone seems to like my hugs. But to a third party observer, my FA "tell" may be pretty obvious if they are paying attention.


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## KHayes666 (Aug 7, 2014)

I have two "tells". One of which my co-workers picked up on is my eyes wander whenever a bbw/ssbbw walks by, turning my head in the process.

The second is a bit more obvious, if I'm standing behind a well proportioned woman, I'm not looking at the back of her head that's for sure.


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## spookytwigg (Aug 10, 2014)

KHayes666 said:


> I have two "tells". One of which my co-workers picked up on is my eyes wander whenever a bbw/ssbbw walks by, turning my head in the process.
> 
> The second is a bit more obvious, if I'm standing behind a well proportioned woman, I'm not looking at the back of her head that's for sure.



Yeah, I have the same thing. I try my best to be respectful (or at least subtle) but I'm sure I almost always fail.


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## fuelingfire (Oct 26, 2014)

Whenever I see someone with a fat partner, I instantly wonder if I am seeing a FA.


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## ed1980 (Oct 26, 2014)

It is quite strange, but I know some dude I see somewhere is a FA by looking at his girl/wife/whatever. Men's body language is a complete mistery to me, but women's is a lot of fun. Cristal clear ....


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## J_Underscore (Dec 2, 2014)

My tell is if you saw me in public with my wife you will see that my arms are permanently moulded around her in tight tight walking cuddles


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## Xyantha Reborn (Dec 2, 2014)

I am guilty of the belly oogle or following with my eyes. I know that often my eyes want to fall to the belly if i am talking to someone (like at work) so i have tried to master the art of looking downish, wyes unfocused like i am thinking. Esp tight shirts/buttons gaping.

Cooking? Tend to push food and apparently grin when i hear the contended/full groans.

With the hubster i tend to place my hands on his belly for balance when i reach up to kiss...caress a love handle while we talk in public...and tend to try and sneak my fingers between his belly and thighs while he is sitting, if he lets me. Also tend to press my cheek into his tummy while i lay down on the couch to cuddle.

I try not to oogle the big boys too hard because its rarely appreciated...but if i am caught i make sure i give a friendly smile.


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## babette (Feb 20, 2015)

I remember 6 or 7 years ago while I was having lunch with my mother in a restaurant I saw a (thin) guy spoon feeding his bbw girlfriend/wife. I couldn't take my eyes off of them as much as I tried.

I always have my hand on my bf's love handles. My favourite thing in public is sneaking my hand up his shirt and feeling his love handles/back fat, especially when we are in a club.

I always have my head on his belly whenever we are on a plane/boat, lying down on the couch, whenever it's remotely appropriate.

Last week we were watching a movie and his roomate caught me with my head under my bf's shirt. I guess if I saw anyone else do it, it would be a definite 'tell' because no (F)FA can resist having their head on a bare belly. There's nothing better than that.


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## ODFFA (Feb 21, 2015)

Anyone walking into my room might notice, in one corner, a little Laughing Buddha carved out of wood and in the other corner this unique container. 

View attachment 20150221_175746.jpg


My mom saw it somewhere obscure, immediately thought of me and bought it :happy: (Ironic apologies for the size of the pic.)


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## Xyantha Reborn (Feb 21, 2015)

That is priceless!!


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## YoJoshua (Feb 21, 2015)

This is fun. And it reminds me...

I am a pretty affectionate person, and if someone wants a hug, I'm right there. Usually the other person wants one, too, and there you go.

When I hug a big girl, though, I really HAVE to be careful, if my hands fall into or onto rolls or folds or back fat somehow, to just be very conscious NOT to squeeze.

I have to say to myself, "Hug, and back away."

The reason being is that, like many FAs, to me rolls and folds are extremely provocative. Despite my manners, despite my treating women with respect and dignity, when a roll is in my hand it's very tough to pull it away. 

But I do. No unauthorized squeezing of the merchandise!

I liked your post, it's always great to see public displays of chub-love between two!


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## LinathSuru (Feb 22, 2015)

My honey's got a few tells...

One is the way his fingers just find the soft part of whatever part of my body he's touching. In example, hands... We hold hands, and eventually I find his hand is under mind, his thumb has come up between my thumb and index finger. His index finger holds the tiny bit of webbing there, but his thumb pets the tiny bit of fat there. More obvious places too, of course.

Sounds & breathing are another thing. It's funny, but he's always telling me that I make the most divine content and indulgent noises when I'm eating something I enjoy... But I've found that I'll be eating something I love and hear him make a content noise of his own. It always makes me blush. He catches his breath with certain attire, or door frames, etc.

His hand finds the roll right above my hip when he wraps an arm around me, and most of the time his fingers tuck under it completely... His eyes follow pretty women when they walk by (but to be fair, so do mine as I'm bi).

My own FA tells are a lot more blatant. ^^; I love to lightly pinch and knead and pet just about any soft place on a person... The only semi-subtle thing I can think of is that I have a strong tendency to slip my hand up under my fella's shirt if I think I can get away with it.

I also can't help teasing him by licking my lips at him if I think only he can see me and I got a good view, like his shirt slipped up or something (he gets so playfully flustered)... Pretty sure an FA would pick up on that one.


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