# Ok Fat Admires, Get out there and mingle, NOW!



## CuteyChubb (Sep 23, 2007)

Further to Conrads post "Why FA's miss out in real life", I'd like to see you closet single FA's come out of your closet, turn off your computer and get out of the house. Where should you go? To your neighbood restaurant or bar. You see the fat girl sitting next to her pretty average sized friend. Pull up your chair to the pretty BBW or SSBBW. Ask if it's ok to sit there for a bit. Ask her name. Y'know smalll talk. Shit, watch the "Pick Up Artist' on VH1 on Monday nights. Buy her a drink or a bucket of beer, Ask for her number. Plan a date for the upcoming week. As Nike said "Just Do It". 

Yes rejection sucks, but you'll get over it. Just lke a bikiniwax, it hurts less the more you do it. Practice makes perfect but you will never get the large and lovely woman of your dreams if you just sit there.


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## Dr. Feelgood (Sep 23, 2007)

This is excellent advice, but I'd like to add a cautionary note: make sure the place you go to is one you feel comfortable in yourself. A bar can be a good place to meet girls who like to drink, but if you're a teetotaler, you're NOT going to meet the love of your life there. And don't go to a church just to check out the femmes if you're a dyed-in-the-wool atheist. Just go where you naturally go, and look for the opportunities there.

P.S.
Grocery shopping is a natural. Hang around and look like you're checking out the rutabagas until she gets into line, and then slip into line behind her. You can always find something to chat about while you wait -- the high price of rutabagas, if nothing else.


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## CleverBomb (Sep 23, 2007)

Dr. Feelgood said:


> This is excellent advice, but I'd like to add a cautionary note: make sure the place you go to is one you feel comfortable in yourself. A bar can be a good place to meet girls who like to drink, but if you're a teetotaler, you're NOT going to meet the love of your life there. And don't go to a church just to check out the femmes if you're a dyed-in-the-wool atheist. Just go where you naturally go, and look for the opportunities there.
> 
> P.S.
> Grocery shopping is a natural. Hang around and look like you're checking out the rutabagas until she gets into line, and then slip into line behind her. You can always find something to chat about while you wait -- the high price of rutabagas, if nothing else.


Bonus points:
Ladies, if some fellow chats you up in a grocery store line and mentions rutebegas, you'll immediately know that:
1. He's from Dims.
2. He's _waay_ too literal. 


-Rusty


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## Zoom (Sep 23, 2007)

My neighborhood bar has 99% Polish-speaking clientele who drink only cheap imported beer and are unintelligible even when sober.

My neighborhood restaurant is Burger King. Guess which of the two I've been going to almost daily for the last four years.

And by the way, I am *NOT* making excuses! I have been forced into this online lifestyle by circumstances beyond my control.

Oh, and:


Cliff Claven said:


> Care for beetabega fajita on a pita?





CuteyChubb said:


> Shit, watch the "Pick Up Artist' on VH1 on Monday nights


I know which of the two _I'd_ rather do.


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## CuteyChubb (Sep 23, 2007)

If ofter heard about this grocery store tactic. I think it is an urban legend, The only time I was pursued at a store was by a man twice my age, not my type and I thought he was a sex predator as I had my lovely daughters with me,


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## CleverBomb (Sep 23, 2007)

CuteyChubb said:


> If ofter heard about this grocery store tactic. I think it is an urban legend, The only time I was pursued at a store was by a man twice my age, not my type and I thought he was a sex predator as I had my lovely daughters with me,


And since he didn't mention rutebegas, he obviously wasn't from here.

-Rusty


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## gangstadawg (Sep 23, 2007)

CuteyChubb said:


> Further to Conrads post "Why FA's miss out in real life", I'd like to see you closet single FA's come out of your closet, turn off your computer and get out of the house. Where should you go? To your neighbood restaurant or bar. You see the fat girl sitting next to her pretty average sized friend. Pull up your chair to the pretty BBW or SSBBW. Ask if it's ok to sit there for a bit. Ask her name. Y'know smalll talk. Shit, watch the "Pick Up Artist' on VH1 on Monday nights. Buy her a drink or a bucket of beer, Ask for her number. Plan a date for the upcoming week. As Nike said "Just Do It".
> 
> Yes rejection sucks, but you'll get over it. Just lke a bikiniwax, it hurts less the more you do it. Practice makes perfect but you will never get the large and lovely woman of your dreams if you just sit there.


i hate to sound like im trying to start something but based on some threads of one sidedness at fullfiggas how about the bbws/ssbbws do the same (well similar) and go after an FA. confidence is a good trait.


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## Sweet Tooth (Sep 23, 2007)

gangstadawg said:


> i hate to soend like im not trying to start something but based on some threads of one sidedness at fullfiggas how about the bbws/ssbbws do the same (well similar) and go after an FA. confidence is a good trait.



But you know we're fat. Unless you wear a sign, we don't know you're an FA. Maybe we should have a standard logo for all FAs, or perhaps a secret handshake, so they're readily identifiable.


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## gangstadawg (Sep 23, 2007)

Sweet Tooth said:


> But you know we're fat. Unless you wear a sign, we don't know you're an FA. Maybe we should have a standard logo for all FAs, or perhaps a secret handshake, so they're readily identifiable.


well the glbt have rainbows. FAs have........ well nothing. saome one needs to get started and think one up.


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## Isa (Sep 23, 2007)

gangstadawg said:


> well the glbt have rainbows so us FAs have........ well nothing.



Here's your chance to come up with something....


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## Isa (Sep 23, 2007)

Zoom said:


> My neighborhood bar has 99% Polish-speaking clientele who drink only cheap imported beer and are unintelligible even when sober.
> 
> My neighborhood restaurant is Burger King. Guess which of the two I've been going to almost daily for the last four years.
> 
> And by the way, I am *NOT* making excuses! I have been forced into this online lifestyle by circumstances beyond my control.



So.... you never leave the neighborhood?


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## Sandie_Zitkus (Sep 23, 2007)

Ladies I am here to tell you a little assertiveness can bring amazing results.

Get out there and if you see a guy you like - say hello!! How do you think I got Wayne to notice me??? C'mon ladies guys love that.


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## bmann0413 (Sep 23, 2007)

Well... I would try, but the girls here at school scare me...

Also, they think they're a little too hot for a guy like me... which they are , but still...

And for that sign thingie, why not have a picture of a silouetted BBW and under it, it says "F.A. right here!"?


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## Sandie_Zitkus (Sep 23, 2007)

That is a fabulous idea for a T-shirt!!!






bmann0413 said:


> Well... I would try, but the girls here at school scare me...
> 
> Also, they think they're a little too hot for a guy like me... which they are , but still...
> 
> And for that sign thingie, why not have a picture of a silouetted BBW and under it, it says "F.A. right here!"?


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## JerseyGirl07093 (Sep 23, 2007)

Meanwhile, I'll be here standing in the checkout line with my rutabagas in hand.....:wubu:
(and somewhere in the back of my mind a little voice is saying 'that's what SHE said!)


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## BothGunsBlazing (Sep 23, 2007)

Yes Drill Sergeant!!!

Oh, but seriously, what people have failed to mention is this.

When you talk to a girl online, right? See, you can arrange to meet them. I know, it's mindblowing and all, but if you're a shy person and would like to talk to some one online first before meeting them .. that is OK. Just make sure to actually, you know, meet them eventually.


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## chickadee (Sep 23, 2007)

Go to the local library in the evenings or on weekends. I can vouch for this- I've met an awful lot of nice folks in the library. 

Also, community service activities are a great place to meet people: neighborhood cleanups, Special Olympics, etc. If you're into that sort of thing.


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Sep 23, 2007)

CuteyChubb said:


> If ofter heard about this grocery store tactic. I think it is an urban legend, The only time I was pursued at a store was by a man twice my age, not my type and I thought he was a sex predator as I had my lovely daughters with me,



Lol, I probably would have thought the same......oh, and it won't let me rep you again for making this thread


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## CuteyChubb (Sep 23, 2007)

gangstadawg said:


> i hate to sound like im trying to start something but based on some threads of one sidedness at fullfiggas how about the bbws/ssbbws do the same (well similar) and go after an FA. confidence is a good trait.



And just how are we supposed to know you are a FA gangstadawg? Unless you are wearing a T-shirt with it blatantly written on it? Yoo could just be one of those "other" guys.


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## CuteyChubb (Sep 23, 2007)

Sorry, I didn't read the earlier posts. ('bout the t-shirts)

Ok until the shirt thing gets out to the masses, I say you closted FA's get up some good old huevos and make that move. Let's get back to the olden days where the men made the first move. Shall we/ Just for a bit. BTW, I am single to hit me up on the PM if you think I'm purty. I assure you, there is enough junk in the trunk.


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## tonynyc (Sep 23, 2007)

CuteyChubb said:


> And just how are we supposed to know you are a FA gangstadawg? Unless you are wearing a T-shirt with it blatantly written on it? Yoo could just be one of those "other" guys.



I thought that drooling and a blank stare would be a dead giveaway


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## CuteyChubb (Sep 23, 2007)

tonynyc said:


> I thought that drooling and a blank stare would be a dead giveaway



No Tony, you have got to communicate. Otherwisw we might think you have a handicapped tag. (No offence to those with the tag)


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## fatgirlflyin (Sep 23, 2007)

CuteyChubb said:


> Further to Conrads post "Why FA's miss out in real life", I'd like to see you closet single FA's come out of your closet, turn off your computer and get out of the house. Where should you go? To your neighbood restaurant or bar. You see the fat girl sitting next to her pretty average sized friend. Pull up your chair to the pretty BBW or SSBBW. Ask if it's ok to sit there for a bit. Ask her name. Y'know smalll talk. Shit, watch the "Pick Up Artist' on VH1 on Monday nights. Buy her a drink or a bucket of beer, Ask for her number. Plan a date for the upcoming week. As Nike said "Just Do It".
> 
> Yes rejection sucks, but you'll get over it. Just lke a bikiniwax, it hurts less the more you do it. Practice makes perfect but you will never get the large and lovely woman of your dreams if you just sit there.



I think its kinda cool when the fat girl does the approaching too. Fear of rejection goes both ways. Lots of people (myself included) find a confident woman to be a very sexy creature.


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Sep 23, 2007)

I'm one of those bitchy types that makes the man ask if he wants to get near some of my goody good...... ooooooppppsssssssssss errrrrrrrrrrr I mean if he wants a date


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## fatgirlflyin (Sep 23, 2007)

Green Eyed Fairy said:


> I'm one of those bitchy types that make the man ask if he wants to get near some of my goody good...... ooooooppppsssssssssss errrrrrrrrrrr I mean if he wants a date



LOL! Most women I know are the same way about the man being the one to approach


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## CuteyChubb (Sep 23, 2007)

Ella Bella said:


> I think its kinda cool when the fat girl does the approaching too. Fear of rejection goes both ways. Lots of people (myself included) find a confident woman to be a very sexy creature.



I was once one of those creatures. One day after 4 shots of Petrone and 3 top shelf margaritas, I asked a young cute man to dance. He literally looked at me with DISGUST and walked away from me. No, I didn't cry a river but it I haven't done it since. A simple "no thankyou" would have been quit6e sufficient. Maybe on my nexy venture it will be 5 shots and 4 margaritas.


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## Jon Blaze (Sep 23, 2007)

Sweet Tooth said:


> But you know we're fat. Unless you wear a sign, we don't know you're an FA. Maybe we should have a standard logo for all FAs, or perhaps a secret handshake, so they're readily identifiable.



It still can't be one-sided though. Not everyone is naturally extroverted, and while FAs should definitely approach BBWs if they are interested: That confidence has to be something that both people have.

I've approached larger women before: I approached my last two exes, and we ended up dating in part because of that, but I don't approach every larger woman that I may deem attractive or anything: That's just how I roll.  I'm in between extroversion and introversion, and that has nothing to do with any size.

I do talk about my views sometimes, and that's usually how people come to ask about it.

I'm personally considering wearing some FA/SA memorabilia x times per week/month in the future, but I'm too broke to get my equipment right now. I've seen little things, but there's no universal sign: We need one!  

I was going to buy a fat hatred bingo shirt for my future 5k, but I'm injured. I might still buy one for the next one though. 

I just think that no one side can be blamed for it: Be it the BBW/BHMs themselves, or the FAs/FFAs. Confidence that isn't excessive is always sexy.


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Sep 23, 2007)

I'm thinking we should post boob and arse pics again and see if we get any more arguments about who needs to do the asking around here ......


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## elle camino (Sep 23, 2007)

CuteyChubb said:


> I was once one of those creatures. One day after 4 shots of Petrone and 3 top shelf margaritas, I asked a young cute man to dance. He literally looked at me with DISGUST and walked away from me. No, I didn't cry a river but it I haven't done it since. A simple "no thankyou" would have been quit6e sufficient. Maybe on my nexy venture it will be 5 shots and 4 margaritas.




yeah i was gonna say...making the first move sounds lovely on paper, but in reality after you've had enough guys practically puke on your shoes after you go for it in any kinda way, you learn to keep your flirtatiousness to yourself.


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## Jon Blaze (Sep 23, 2007)

Green Eyed Fairy said:


> I'm thinking we should post boob and arse pics again and see if we get any more arguments about who needs to do the asking around here ......



Yea, but you know you want to see a picture of me in my kick pants Greenie: Don't go there. GOSH!  
Just messin'.


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## BothGunsBlazing (Sep 23, 2007)

yeah, when I see a big beautiful woman who I think might be single, I like to on up to her and unveil my identity. 







fatty <3 lover

haha worst picture ever.


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## Jes (Sep 23, 2007)

Zoom said:


> My neighborhood bar has 99% Polish-speaking clientele who drink only cheap imported beer and are unintelligible even when sober.
> 
> My neighborhood restaurant is Burger King. Guess which of the two I've been going to almost daily for the last four years.
> 
> ...



yawn. sorry, but i'm filing this message under 'old comma tired.' If you don't want to meet a fat woman, i'm down with it. i get it. if you do... does a single fat woman live in your house? no? then...


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Sep 23, 2007)

Jon Blaze said:


> Yea, but you know you want to see a picture of me in my kick pants Greenie: Don't go there. GOSH!
> Just messin'.




But YOU are still going to do the asking...trust me on this one


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## supersoup (Sep 23, 2007)

BothGunsBlazing said:


> yeah, when I see a big beautiful woman who I think might be single, I like to on up to her and unveil my identity.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



see, even my painfully oblivious (and rather large) arse can't miss ya when ya do this!!


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## Jon Blaze (Sep 23, 2007)

Green Eyed Fairy said:


> But YOU are still going to do the asking...trust me on this one



With beauty like that: I should.  :wubu:


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## CuteyChubb (Sep 23, 2007)

BothGunsBlazing said:


> yeah, when I see a big beautiful woman who I think might be single, I like to on up to her and unveil my identity.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Ok BothGunsBlazing,

You seem of age, you live in the America, you have a black marker and a sense of humor, You check on the plane tickets and tell me what time your flight comes in. Not to mention, you have some cutie poo eyes, :batting:


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## fatgirlflyin (Sep 23, 2007)

CuteyChubb said:


> I was once one of those creatures. One day after 4 shots of Petrone and 3 top shelf margaritas, I asked a young cute man to dance. He literally looked at me with DISGUST and walked away from me. No, I didn't cry a river but it I haven't done it since. A simple "no thankyou" would have been quit6e sufficient. Maybe on my nexy venture it will be 5 shots and 4 margaritas.



I've been shot down too, it sucks, it hurts but I still do it from time to time. 

4 shots and 3 margaritas is kind of a lot of alcohol, are you sure the look was about you being fat or were you maybe tipsy and he didn't like that?


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## CuteyChubb (Sep 23, 2007)

Ella Bella said:


> I've been shot down too, it sucks, it hurts but I still do it from time to time.
> 
> 4 shots and 3 margaritas is kind of a lot of alcohol, are you sure the look was about you being fat or were you maybe tipsy and he didn't like that?



I never thought of that aspect Ella. I guess I feel like a sex goddess with that much to drink so I expect everyone to see me that way. I'll try again, If he walks away, his loss. BTW, I rarely drink but when I do I assume I must drink more than average b/c I'm a bigger person.


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## fatgirlflyin (Sep 23, 2007)

CuteyChubb said:


> I never thought of that aspect Ella. I guess I feel like a sex goddess with that much to drink so I expect everyone to see me that way. I'll try again, If he walks away, his loss. BTW, I rarely drink but when I do I assume I must drink more than average b/c I'm a bigger person.




You and me both, I can really put it away if I dont pay attention and then all of the sudden it hits me. I too feel like a sex goddess when I drink, that's usually when I can dance half way decently too.


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## elle camino (Sep 23, 2007)

yeah i dunno, i kinda question the wisdom in encouraging fat women to get out there and hit on guys willy nilly, though. for the same reasons i would question the wisdom in advising a lonely gay guy to just get out there and flirt with whatever dudes he might find attractive. one of the many things gay guys and fat chicks have in common: the guys who like us are a vast, vast minority within the overall male population. so random flirting is almost never going to end favorably, and it has a very distinct potential to end really, really badly. 
so yeah.

and man, at least gay guys get gay bars. what do we get! lucky gays. 
*kicks a rock*


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## fatgirlflyin (Sep 23, 2007)

elle camino said:


> yeah i dunno, i kinda question the wisdom in encouraging fat women to get out there and hit on guys willy nilly, though. for the same reasons i would question the wisdom in advising a lonely gay guy to just get out there and flirt with whatever dudes he might find attractive. one of the many things gay guys and fat chicks have in common: the guys who like us are a vast, vast minority within the overall male population. so random flirting is almost never going to end favorably, and it has a very distinct potential to end really, really badly.
> so yeah.
> 
> and man, at least gay guys get gay bars. what do we get! lucky gays.
> *kicks a rock*



I wasn't suggesting willy nilly flirting  and there's kind of a difference between a gay man flirting with whatever cute guy he happens upon (he could very well get beat up) and a fat woman. I just think that sometimes as women we have been taught to wait for things to come to us and I dont see a problem with going after something if you want it. Even if its a guy. 

There are BBW dances, bashes, events in lots of areas. Sure the ratio of men to women is usually in favor of the men but its an avenue to meet men attracted to fat women. I realize they aren't for everyone though.


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## elle camino (Sep 23, 2007)

nah, i'm not saying there's anything wrong _in principle_ with a woman (of any size) approaching a guy, instead of waiting for it to happen the other way around. like i said, in theory it sounds great. but the reality is, just like gay guys run the risk of being laughed at, ridiculed, or even physically threatened or harmed if they hit on the wrong guy, fat women run risks that go way beyond embarrassment and rejection when they choose to hit on what turns out to be the wrong guy. i know a girl from way back (total fox, nofauxx model, maybe 50 pounds bigger than me) who had her head slammed into a wall for trying to kiss a guy who she thought was into her, at a party. the guy was so freaked out that his friends might have seen him almost kiss a fatty that it triggered the exact same fight or flight mechanism that's blamed for basically every gaybashing that's ever been triggered by a gay guy making a move on some straight guy. 

so i'm saying in my experience, the comparison is valid.


edit: as for BBW dances, meh. twice or three times a year, never happen anywhere even remotely close to the city, high school dance atmosphere, full of people twice my age and like maybe one guy for every 15 girls? not exactly analogous to a place like a gay bar that's always there, there's at least one in every neighborhood, and, y'know...they're actually fun to go to, even if you don't find the gay love of your gay life. 

someone needs to open a fatbar. asap.


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## KnottyOne (Sep 23, 2007)

BothGunsBlazing said:


> yeah, when I see a big beautiful woman who I think might be single, I like to on up to her and unveil my identity.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Come on bro, you gotta play a lil harder to get then that lol.

O, and on a total side note... Post 1000... wow, took longer to get here then i though lol


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## BothGunsBlazing (Sep 23, 2007)

KnottyOne said:


> Come on bro, you gotta play a lil harder to get then that lol.
> 
> O, and on a total side note... Post 1000... wow, took longer to get here then i though lol



haha considering 99% of big women have no idea what an FA is, they'd probably just think I was really poor and have no money for real shirts. If anything I am losing out on the deal.


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## fatgirlflyin (Sep 23, 2007)

elle camino said:


> nah, i'm not saying there's anything wrong _in principle_ with a woman (of any size) approaching a guy, instead of waiting for it to happen the other way around. like i said, in theory it sounds great. but the reality is, just like gay guys run the risk of being laughed at, ridiculed, or even physically threatened or harmed if they hit on the wrong guy, fat women run risks that go way beyond embarrassment and rejection when they choose to hit on what turns out to be the wrong guy. i know a girl from way back (total fox, nofauxx model, maybe 50 pounds bigger than me) who had her head slammed into a wall for trying to kiss a guy who she thought was into her, at a party. the guy was so freaked out that his friends might have seen him almost kiss a fatty that it triggered the exact same fight or flight mechanism that's blamed for basically every gaybashing that's ever been triggered by a gay guy making a move on some straight guy.
> 
> so i'm saying in my experience, the comparison is valid.



Based on that I can see where you'd draw the comparison.  Very sad


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## Zoom (Sep 23, 2007)

As I thought. I don't disclose my circumstances owing to privacy, and some of you jump all over me as though it were MY fault.

My point is that you can't make me "mingle" if there is no adequate mingling venue. Out of the neighborhood is a problem; basically owing to my job, it must be when I have the time off. And the bus runs through the area. (Remember this is Chicago, whose bus service is disintegrating and routes are being removed.)

Oh, and about five thousand other things. None of which anyone really wants to hear about, but which are still problems no matter how much you don't care.

Anyway, let's just leave it at that when offline, some FAs like myself are not going to have the shyness overcome to do anything useful, just on your say-so.


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## KnottyOne (Sep 23, 2007)

BothGunsBlazing said:


> haha considering 99% of big women have no idea what an FA is, they'd probably just think I was really poor and have no money for real shirts. If anything I am losing out on the deal.



Yo, in that case dress to impress lol, ya kno, maybe a wristband that says it, they can be hot lol. Jus somethin you can kinda flash as a secondary, dont gotta be strait up with it, play it cool, and keep it stylin.


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## fatgirlflyin (Sep 23, 2007)

elle camino said:


> edit: as for BBW dances, meh. twice or three times a year, never happen anywhere even remotely close to the city, high school dance atmosphere, full of people twice my age and like maybe one guy for every 15 girls? not exactly analogous to a place like a gay bar that's always there, there's at least one in every neighborhood, and, y'know...they're actually fun to go to, even if you don't find the gay love of your gay life.
> 
> someone needs to open a fatbar. asap.



HA! I said they weren't for everyone  I think it depends on which you go to and as I'm thinking about your area, you are right as far as the areas, ratios and age range. I play the lotto every now and again in hopes of winning enough money to open up my very own club!


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## gangstadawg (Sep 23, 2007)

CuteyChubb said:


> And just how are we supposed to know you are a FA gangstadawg? Unless you are wearing a T-shirt with it blatantly written on it? Yoo could just be one of those "other" guys.


then take a chance and hope for the best. the worst that can happen is rejection. FA or not.


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## elle camino (Sep 23, 2007)

eff that, we're not psychic. the FA can clearly see who's fat and who's not, we're not afforded that luxury. like it or not, the onus is on the FA. get off the internerd, get out there and chat up fatties. scoot.


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## fatgirlflyin (Sep 23, 2007)

Zoom said:


> My point is that you can't make me "mingle" if there is no adequate mingling venue. Out of the neighborhood is a problem; basically owing to my job, it must be when I have the time off. And the bus runs through the area. (Remember this is Chicago, whose bus service is disintegrating and routes are being removed.)



Aren't there ever any fat women on the bus you find attractive?



Zoom said:


> Anyway, let's just leave it at that when offline, some FAs like myself are not going to have the shyness overcome to do anything useful, just on your say-so



No one is saying you have to all of the sudden not be shy. It just is a little frustrating that many men online will sing the praises of fat women but when they meet one out in the real world they act like they couldn't carry a tune if it were in a bucket.


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## Isa (Sep 23, 2007)

Zoom said:


> As I thought. I don't disclose my circumstances owing to privacy, and some of you jump all over me as though it were MY fault.
> 
> My point is that you can't make me "mingle" if there is no adequate mingling venue. Out of the neighborhood is a problem; basically owing to my job, it must be when I have the time off. And the bus runs through the area. (Remember this is Chicago, whose bus service is disintegrating and routes are being removed.)
> 
> ...




No one is asking you (or any other FA) to become Rico Suave, just make some type of advance if you see a fat girl that interests you. 

I'm not going to comment again on the neighborhood thing because it seems like you're dead set on that one.


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## CuteyChubb (Sep 24, 2007)

Well, I sure don't wish to have my head bashed into a wall, That would be way worse than the disgusted walk away or the puking on shoes, I'm not giving up though. There's love for us out there. I believe that to be true.


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## Sandie_Zitkus (Sep 24, 2007)

elle camino said:


> eff that, we're not psychic. the FA can clearly see who's fat and who's not, we're not afforded that luxury. like it or not, the onus is on the FA. get off the internerd, get out there and chat up fatties. scoot.




I disagree completely. If I want something I go get it. I don't wait for it to come to me. I went to so many fat dances when single I can't even count them. Some were horrible some were great. I met Wayne at one. And he was dating another woman when we met. If it's meant to be it will. 

You have to get out just like the advice you are giving FA's. If everyone is hiding how in the world wil anyone ever meet?


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## gangstadawg (Sep 24, 2007)

CuteyChubb said:


> Well, I sure don't wish to have my head bashed into a wall, That would be way worse than the disgusted walk away or the puking on shoes, I'm not giving up though. There's love for us out there. I believe that to be true.


umm who would bash a womans head into a wall for asking for a date?


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## CuteyChubb (Sep 24, 2007)

elle camino said:


> i know a girl from way back (total fox, nofauxx model, maybe 50 pounds bigger than me) who had her head slammed into a wall for trying to kiss a guy who she thought was into her, at a party. the guy was so freaked out that his friends might have seen him almost kiss a fatty so i'm saying in my experience, the comparison is valid.
> .



gangstadawg, this is what i referred to


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## elle camino (Sep 24, 2007)

Sandie_Zitkus said:


> You have to get out just like the advice you are giving FA's. If everyone is hiding how in the world wil anyone ever meet?


yeah i don't see where you're getting the idea that i don't go out from. not from this thread, or really from anything else i've ever posted here. i'm 26 years old, i have a ridiculously active social life, and a crapton of friends and acquaintances. due to the nature of my job and my social circle i'd say i'm out an average of about 5 nights a week, every week. believe me, girl. i'm out there.


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## elle camino (Sep 24, 2007)

gangstadawg said:


> umm who would bash a womans head into a wall for asking for a date?


the same kind of person who'd knock a gay guy unconscious for whistling at him? a ragingly insecure psychopath asshole? that'd be my best guess.


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## gangstadawg (Sep 24, 2007)

elle camino said:


> the same kind of person who'd knock a gay guy unconscious for whistling at him? a ragingly insecure psychopath asshole? that'd be my best guess.


not exactly the same thing since its dishonerable to hit a woman but if a gay guy tries to flirt then let him no your straight but if he doesnt take no for an answer then its time to kick it up a notch. if he he touches you and its by law classified as harrasment then its time to give him a good uppercut.


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## Blackjack (Sep 24, 2007)

gangstadawg said:


> not exactly the same thing since its dishonerable to hit a woman.



Why is it any less dishonorable to hit a homosexual in such a situation?


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## fatgirlflyin (Sep 24, 2007)

gangstadawg said:


> not exactly the same thing since its dishonerable to hit a woman.



its also dishonorable to hit a gay man! Its dishonorable to just waylay someone because you dont like something about them. A real man says to himself, hey its not my cup of tea and chooses not to belittle someone or be physical with someone.


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## Sandie_Zitkus (Sep 24, 2007)

elle camino said:


> yeah i don't see where you're getting the idea that i don't go out from. not from this thread, or really from anything else i've ever posted here. i'm 26 years old, i have a ridiculously active social life, and a crapton of friends and acquaintances. due to the nature of my job and my social circle i'd say i'm out an average of about 5 nights a week, every week. believe me, girl. i'm out there.




Well that's great. I think the more you are out the better. Please do not take this the wrong way - but is it possible that your experiences have left you at a place where you have a hard time knowing if a guy is flirting with you and if he isn't??

I just assumed all men were flirting with me. LOL Consiquently I talked to a lot of men. Some were interested some weren't.


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## elle camino (Sep 24, 2007)

Sandie_Zitkus said:


> Please do not take this the wrong way - but is it possible that your experiences have left you at a place where you have a hard time knowing if a guy is flirting with you and if he isn't??


anything's possible, but i seriously doubt it. to make myself perfectly clear: i am in NO way saying that it's reasonable (for me or anyone else) to go around assuming that every guy i might feel like approaching is going to whip out a katana and slice my head off, at all. i'm not afraid of meeting new people, hell it's my JOB to network socially out at bars. subsequently, i have the aforementioned crapton of friends and acquaintances. if a guy were to approach me and flirt, i'd know it. hell i'd frigging revel in it, if only for the novelty factor.


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## gangstadawg (Sep 24, 2007)

Blackjack said:


> Why is it any less dishonorable to hit a homosexual in such a situation?


because people say a woman is physically weaker ( thats bullshit) its dishonerable to hit a woman unless its self-defense and she has a weapon but you may wanna have a camera phone in case the cops wanna flip the script on you.


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## gangstadawg (Sep 24, 2007)

Ella Bella said:


> its also dishonorable to hit a gay man! Its dishonorable to just waylay someone because you dont like something about them. A real man says to himself, hey its not my cup of tea and chooses not to belittle someone or be physical with someone.


i edited my post


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## Sandie_Zitkus (Sep 24, 2007)

Then sweetheart I'm stumped You are gorgeous and if I was single or wanting some female company right now - I'd hit on you - in a NY minute!!!!!! (that was a compliment) 





elle camino said:


> anything's possible, but i seriously doubt it. to make myself perfectly clear: i am in NO way saying that it's reasonable (for me or anyone else) to go around assuming that every guy i might feel like approaching is going to whip out a katana and slice my head off, at all. i'm not afraid of meeting new people, hell it's my JOB to network socially out at bars. subsequently, i have the aforementioned crapton of friends and acquaintances. if a guy were to approach me and flirt, i'd know it. hell i'd frigging revel in it, if only for the novelty factor.


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## elle camino (Sep 24, 2007)

yep, the ladies love me. 
:batting:


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## Blackjack (Sep 24, 2007)

gangstadawg said:


> because people say a woman is physically weaker ( thats bullshit) its dishonerable to hit a woman unless its self-defense and she has a weapon but you may wanna have a camera phone in case the cops wanna flip the script on you.



You didn't answer the question.


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## elle camino (Sep 24, 2007)

gangstadawg said:


> not exactly the same thing since its dishonerable to hit a woman but if a gay guy tries to flirt then let him no your straight but if he doesnt take no for an answer then its time to kick it up a notch. if he he touches you and its by law classified as harrasment then its time to give him a good uppercut.



i hope you realize that violence and homophobia are considered repulsive by intelligent women.

something you might want to keep in mind.


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## fatgirlflyin (Sep 24, 2007)

gangstadawg said:


> i edited my post




I saw that you edited it but still if someone hits on you that you aren't interested in, whether its a gay man or a straight woman you've no right to beat them. 

I'll never understand why people want to hit someone when its so easy to turn around and walk away.


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## BothGunsBlazing (Sep 24, 2007)

this thread has been derailed by ignorance, yay!

and this is exactly how people end up beaten to death. by "taking it up a notch"


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## gangstadawg (Sep 24, 2007)

Blackjack said:


> You didn't answer the question.


its dishonerable to hit anyone in a situation that does not call for it. male or female.


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## Blackjack (Sep 24, 2007)

gangstadawg said:


> its dishonerable to hit anyone in a situation that does not call for it. male or female.



...which is why you condone it in your other post.


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## gangstadawg (Sep 24, 2007)

elle camino said:


> i hope you realize that violence and homophobia are considered repulsive by intelligent women.
> 
> something you might want to keep in mind.


im not being homophobic. if i dont want nobody to touch me then i dont. if some one touches you and by law its deemed sexual harrasment are you going to call the cops and wait or are you going to do something about it? and no im not saying gay males are going to touch every male they see but i have met some that are like that in public and my uncle is gay and he is like that since i saw him do it in the super market and saw his jaw get cracked.


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## gangstadawg (Sep 24, 2007)

Blackjack said:


> ...which is why you condone it in your other post.


and this is why i have to re edit so damn much. im going to really have to break stuff down for you guys. and plus for some peeps seem to reducing their common sense usage.


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## fatgirlflyin (Sep 24, 2007)

gangstadawg said:


> and this is why i have to re edit so damn much. im going to really have to break stuff down for you guys.



I dont need anything to be broken down for me, I'm pretty good about reading what's put out there. Maybe you have to re edit a lot because you seem to put your foot in your mouth quite often and get called on it?


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## elle camino (Sep 24, 2007)

guys, some people are kinda just beyond common sense. let him keep making an ass out of himself, it's pretty funny.


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## gangstadawg (Sep 24, 2007)

Ella Bella said:


> I dont need anything to be broken down for me, I'm pretty good about reading what's put out there. Maybe you have to re edit a lot because you seem to put your foot in your mouth quite often and get called on it?


no. i re edit because i seem to have to add info that some people should already know. and to camino what was the point of adding the beating of a gay male element to the convo when the element in that post was a woman getting beat. your adding a element that was not apart of the post.


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## fatgirlflyin (Sep 24, 2007)

gangstadawg said:


> no. i re edit because i seem to have to add info that some people should already know. and to camino what was the point of adding the beating of a gay male element to the convo when the element in that post was a woman getting beat.




Did you read the whole thread? If not you should, wayyyyyyyy up there gay men and fat women were compared. That's where the gay male element came into play.


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## gangstadawg (Sep 24, 2007)

Ella Bella said:


> Did you read the whole thread? If not you should, wayyyyyyyy up there gay men and fat women were compared. That's where the gay male element came into play.


im not talking about the thread as a whole. im talking about that particular post about the woman that got hit.

edit: so please for the love of god get back on topic. this thread is about to get more derailed then amtrak.


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## liz (di-va) (Sep 24, 2007)

I read the first post and then this last page...wot happened?

Wot happened to hookin up ffat ffolk and those who ffancy them?


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## elle camino (Sep 24, 2007)

gangstadawg said:


> im not talking about the thread as a whole. im talking about that particular post about the woman that got hit.


hahahahah holy crap.
what is there to even say. maybe he _can't_ read? 

anywho.


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## fatgirlflyin (Sep 24, 2007)

elle camino said:


> hahahahah holy crap.
> what is there to even say. maybe he _can't_ read?
> 
> anywho.



I was leaving it alone.


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## elle camino (Sep 24, 2007)

good plan.


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## gangstadawg (Sep 24, 2007)

elle camino said:


> hahahahah holy crap.
> what is there to even say. maybe he _can't_ read?
> 
> anywho.


no its nearly 2am here in detroit. i dont feel like looking through this thread right now. call me lazy if you want but i have been working on peeps computers all day so i really dont feel like going through the thread for a minor detail of a post. so for the love of god please get this thread on track.


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## ripley (Sep 24, 2007)

BothGunsBlazing is just too cute. I hereby match him with elle camino. Get to PMing you two. And then meet, soon. 


And then invite me to your wedding.



And then post lots of baby pics.




Name the first one Ripley. :wubu:


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## Green Eyed Fairy (Sep 24, 2007)

CuteyChubb said:


> Well, I sure don't wish to have my head bashed into a wall, That would be way worse than the disgusted walk away or the puking on shoes, I'm not giving up though. There's love for us out there. I believe that to be true.




You know... with my track record, I find a big number of, those that are attracted to me and express it, a-holes out there that approach me. I would hate to see what numbers of jerks I would attract if I went out searching 
Seriously, women have to be cautious. We are often times perceived as "sluts" or "too open" or something along those lines if we are too "aggressive" in our sexual interests. It's accepted and even expected for the males to do the pursuing. I have found that I am good at flirting if I am interested, so that should be cue or clue enough for any man to let me know if he reciprocates my wishes.
In my personal experiences, it has always been better for the man to make the first move.


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## Tad (Sep 24, 2007)

I admit Im a big curious about the go to a bar and approach someone advice. How many people do you know that started a long term relationship that way? Im sure that there are some, but I really dont think it is that typical. Looking at eleven of my closest friends and myself, ten are currently in long term relationships. One guy met his wife in a club, but she was part of a group teaching latin dances there once a week, and he was going to that bar regularly, so they got to know each other over several interactions before they started dating. Another of the guys did meet his gf in a similar type of situation, in that they were at a party or something like that and he approached her knowing nothing about her. 

Of the other eight relationships, two started over the net (one online dating, the other got to know each other through a gaming mailing list originally, and they overcame the LDR and the border, and are now married and have a baby together). Two started through work contact, two started through school contact, one met through their sprawling family acquaintances, and one met through friends (actually she first dated another of the guys, after they broke up another of the guys asked her out, and eventually married her. We spent much of our twenties patching over the rift in the group that little drama created).

Maybe it is different with others, but that seems pretty typical of most stories Ive heard. Through sports, friends, clubs, ended up being neighbors, met through work, and so on. 

So sure, I encourage those guys bold enough to approach strangers in a bar to do so. But more usefully, Id say to BBW: tell us where an FA could get to know you. Not just see you in passing, but some place/activity where you actually sometimes interact repeatedly with people that you dont previously knowbasically where someone could get to know you. For most people work will be one such place, but most people dont have the freedom to hop jobs looking for likely partners. So aside from work, unless you have the sort of job where you interact with a lot of non-coworkers repeatedly (like teaching night classes to adults, or something like that).

I dont know, maybe that could almost be another thread, as it is quite different from the point of this one. Im sure that there are incredibly diverse answers, but it might still give some FA ideas of what sort of activities they might want to take up. 

I aim this at the BBW rather than the FA for two reasons. First of all, the consensus from the women seems to be that they want the guys to make the first movealthough in a scenario where you get to know each other it is much easier to tell when someone else is interested. The second is that diverse as the BBW list is, I suspect that the FA list may be even more diverse, and is apt to feature more activities that BBW might find difficult to take up (no matter how many people you meet doing sky diving, there are not apt to be many SSBBW I would think).

And of course, if any of you get to thinking where could someone naturally get to know me, outside of work and the net then that may be worth thinking about too. For what it is worth, that is pretty much my situation, so Im not slamming anyone for itbut Im not looking to make new connections. If I were, Id need a big kick in the back side to get me out and meeting more people.

Regards;

-Ed


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## butch (Sep 24, 2007)

After reading this thread, all I can say is, thank goodness I have a sex drive on the lower end of the spectrum; and that I'm an introvert. Otherwise, I'd be in big trouble.


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## Wayne_Zitkus (Sep 24, 2007)

CuteyChubb said:


> If ofter heard about this grocery store tactic. I think it is an urban legend, The only time I was pursued at a store was by a man twice my age, not my type and I thought he was a sex predator as I had my lovely daughters with me,


Back in the '80s, the Kings SUpermarket in Morristown, NJ (my old home town) used to have Singles Nights every Thursday. This singles would stroll around with a few things in their carts, meet other singles, and then walk to the nightclub that was a few hundred feet away.

Since they just tore that nightclub down to build yet another bank, I don't know if they're still doing Singles Night there.


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## bmann0413 (Sep 24, 2007)

Well, I'm still too young to go to a nightclub or a bar... and I don't have a car either...

Anybody got any tips then?


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## tonynyc (Sep 25, 2007)

bmann0413 said:


> Well, I'm still too young to go to a nightclub or a bar... and I don't have a car either...
> 
> Anybody got any tips then?



You might want to check some of the online BBW Dating sites and perhaps post and look for BBWs that would be near you. I know that it's going back to doing something online? But, perhaps others may know of some groups in the area? 

Also here is the info on the Louisiana Chapter of NAAFA- not sure if this is still active or not- but, you might want to contact...The info was from the NAAFA website

http://lanaafa.sizepositive.com


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## CAMellie (Sep 25, 2007)

BothGunsBlazing said:


> Yes Drill Sergeant!!!
> 
> Oh, but seriously, what people have failed to mention is this.
> 
> When you talk to a girl online, right? See, you can arrange to meet them. I know, it's mindblowing and all, but if you're a shy person and would like to talk to some one online first before meeting them .. that is OK. Just make sure to actually, you know, meet them eventually.




Yeah...meet them eventually :blink:


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## goofy girl (Sep 25, 2007)

bmann0413 said:


> Well, I'm still too young to go to a nightclub or a bar... and I don't have a car either...
> 
> Anybody got any tips then?



Absolutely...go to a book club, ball games, art class, volunteer at an animal shelter...there are tons of ways to meet people.Find something that interests you, and chances are there will be people there that you will connect with! Oh, and about the no car thing..I met my bf on the bus


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## ashmamma84 (Sep 25, 2007)

Okay, from personal experience -- when I was single, at first, I was terribly shy...and had just gained a bunch of weight, but then I was on the phone complaining to my Mother about how there was a severe lack of educated, good looking, well mannered lesbians, (that of course, like fat chicks)...and you know what she told me -- keep going out, don't stop doing what I love to do, be confident and mingle, because there are women that enjoy doing the same things you do, but might have that same fear of rejection (and let me tell you I was petrified)...so, I did go out, I was approached, and I also did some approaching -- and no, I am not with those people today, but I am glad/fortunate that I actually took the risk of putting myself out there, because in part, I re-gained self esteem that had been lost. 

Sometimes playing it too safe can be detrimental...and maybe it's that we, as women need to come off of our proverbial high horse -- dating isn't merely some passive event (at least in my mind). We can have the companionship/love/intimacy that we crave if we take a chance...and be bold for a change.


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## goofy girl (Sep 25, 2007)

ashmamma84 said:


> Okay, from personal experience -- when I was single, at first, I was terribly shy...and had just gained a bunch of weight, but then I was on the phone complaining to my Mother about how there was a severe lack of educated, good looking, well mannered lesbians, (that of course, like fat chicks)...and you know what she told me -- keep going out, don't stop doing what I love to do, be confident and mingle, because there are women that enjoy doing the same things you do, but might have that same fear of rejection (and let me tell you I was petrified)...so, I did go out, I was approached, and I also did some approaching -- and no, I am not with those people today, but I am glad/fortunate that I actually took the risk of putting myself out there, because in part, I re-gained self esteem that had been lost.
> 
> Sometimes playing it too safe can be detrimental...and maybe it's that we, as women need to come off of our proverbial high horse -- dating isn't merely some passive event (at least in my mind). We can have the companionship/love/intimacy that we crave if we take a chance...and be bold for a change.




I totally agree! A little over a year ago, I saw a "cute boy" on the bus..All I said to him was "Did you miss the bus yesterday?" and we've been together ever since! LOL I was terribly shy "back in the day". I finally started talking to people, and I didn't find Prince Charming right away, but I did make some wonderful friends! That means just as much..or more sometimes!


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## JerseyGirl07093 (Sep 25, 2007)

elle camino said:


> yeah i dunno, i kinda question the wisdom in encouraging fat women to get out there and hit on guys willy nilly, though. for the same reasons i would question the wisdom in advising a lonely gay guy to just get out there and flirt with whatever dudes he might find attractive. one of the many things gay guys and fat chicks have in common: the guys who like us are a vast, vast minority within the overall male population. so random flirting is almost never going to end favorably, and it has a very distinct potential to end really, really badly.
> so yeah.
> 
> and man, at least gay guys get gay bars. what do we get! lucky gays.
> *kicks a rock*



I agree. My thoughts exactly. At least the guy can SEE that I'm fat (and hopefully cute!), how can I TELL just from looking that he is an FA? 
Unless, of course, he has those rutabagas in hand...........


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## Still a Skye fan (Sep 25, 2007)

Sorry...I don't drink enough a year to warrant going into a bar, let alone trying to meet a woman I find attractive in one.

Seeking out women in grocery stores just seems strange and I've no desire to do it.

I don't attend church, so I'm not going to meet anyone there.

I have no interest in sports, so I won't be meeting anyone at a game somewhere.

There aren't any singles groups in my area that I know of.

I couldn't stand most of the people I went to high school and college with and lost touch with them long ago anyway.

Which basically leaves me online dating as my only option.

I DID meet a very lovely and sweet blonde BBW but we weren't right for each other and ended things peacefully. I liked her but she wasn't into me.

I'm trying again but haven't had anything good happen yet.


Dennis


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## goofy girl (Sep 25, 2007)

JerseyGirl07093 said:


> I agree. My thoughts exactly. At least the guy can SEE that I'm fat (and hopefully cute!), how can I TELL just from looking that he is an FA?
> Unless, of course, he has those rutabagas in hand...........



Oh, I dont mean to just flirt with every guy in the world...but it doesnt hurt to say hello. Like I said..I met my bf on the bus, just by starting a converstation. You dont have to go around grabbing asses or anything, but if you get a "look" or something it doesnt hurt to smile and say hi!

Oh, and again..I approached my bf first. He's not an "FA"..and we've been together for a year.  Sometimes people just like each other for each other, not their looks or body types!


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## Santaclear (Sep 25, 2007)

To return for a moment to gangstadawg's gay analogy, let's say JoyJoy and I are mingling and a gay guy approaches us, attracted by my ass. He just can't stay away. :batting: Can't help himself, he says, 'cos I'm so fine and hot and so on. He wants it _so_ bad, you see.

But JoyJoy and I are mingling so we say to him, "excuse me, buddy," trying to get him to back off. But he won't back off. He can't help it, like so many others. :batting: See, I'm wearing those jeans that make my ass look so cute. :smitten: It's so hot. :wubu: Oh. Oh. oh. Oh...oh! Oh!!  OH!

So do we call the cops and wait for them to arrive? :bow: Or just deck the guy.


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## goofy girl (Sep 25, 2007)

Santaclear said:


> To return for a moment to gangstadawg's gay analogy, let's say JoyJoy and I are mingling and a gay guy approaches us, attracted by my ass. He just can't stay away. :batting: Can't help himself, he says, 'cos I'm so fine and hot and so on. He wants it _so_ bad, you see.
> 
> But JoyJoy and I are mingling so we say to him, "excuse me, buddy," trying to get him to back off. But he won't back off. He can't help it, like so many others. :batting: See, I'm wearing those jeans that make my ass look so cute. :smitten: It's so hot. :wubu: Oh. Oh. oh. Oh...oh! Oh!!  OH!
> 
> So do we call the cops and wait for them to arrive? :bow: Or just deck the guy.



Well, I would think that if someone doesn't show interest then an adult would realize it and just walk away. When the heck did being friendly become an issue?? It doesn't hurt to smile at someone and say hello. If someone shows an interest, great...if not, at least you made an effort, but move on.

And, how does every FA know that the BBW he wants to approach will be attracted to him?? Should he worry because he's a blonde..what if she likes guys with dark hair? Or is he going to think that just because a girl is fat she'll be all over any guy that approaches her?!?? 

Approaching people isn't easy for anyone, but to meet people it has to be done!


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## goofy girl (Sep 25, 2007)

HA..I just reread my last post, and noticed that the thread is "fat admirers..get out there and mingle!'

dontcha love it when things come full circle!! LOL


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## ekmanifest (Sep 26, 2007)

I'm fairly new to all this, but I know that for me personally, I would need to be in an environment where I wasn't fearing rejection to approach a man. The BBW dating sites provide that, if you can sort the wheat from the chaff. The dances and BBW clubs I'm sure do that as well. But I think I'm not alone in saying that the idea of going to a bar to meet someone - I'm 41 - I did that when I was 20, and it really wasn't my thing then. Are there other type of BBW/FA events out there? What about salons or speed dating or something like that aimed at this crowd, so at least rejection wouldn't be assumed from the start? Anything like that out there?


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## RedVelvet (Sep 26, 2007)

KnottyOne said:


> Yo, in that case dress to impress lol, ya kno, maybe a wristband that says it, they can be hot lol. Jus somethin you can kinda flash as a secondary, dont gotta be strait up with it, play it cool, and keep it stylin.




wow....do I suddenly feel very old indeed.


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## RedVelvet (Sep 26, 2007)

gangstadawg said:


> not exactly the same thing since its dishonerable to hit a woman but if a gay guy tries to flirt then let him no your straight but if he doesnt take no for an answer then its time to kick it up a notch. if he he touches you and its by law classified as harrasment then its time to give him a good uppercut.



huh.


I see.


fraid of teh gay cooties.


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## RedVelvet (Sep 26, 2007)

Santaclear said:


> To return for a moment to gangstadawg's gay analogy, let's say JoyJoy and I are mingling and a gay guy approaches us, attracted by my ass. He just can't stay away. :batting: Can't help himself, he says, 'cos I'm so fine and hot and so on. He wants it _so_ bad, you see.
> 
> But JoyJoy and I are mingling so we say to him, "excuse me, buddy," trying to get him to back off. But he won't back off. He can't help it, like so many others. :batting: See, I'm wearing those jeans that make my ass look so cute. :smitten: It's so hot. :wubu: Oh. Oh. oh. Oh...oh! Oh!!  OH!
> 
> So do we call the cops and wait for them to arrive? :bow: Or just deck the guy.




Yeah..them fags....its all about the ass.

Personality? Looks? Sexual Orientation? NAW....its the ass.

this....was silly.....so silly it doesnt prove your point..

try...."So if I was a Unicorn....."


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## Santaclear (Sep 26, 2007)

RedVelvet said:


> Yeah..them fags....its all about the ass.
> 
> Personality? Looks? Sexual Orientation? NAW....its the ass.
> 
> ...



It's um, "satire", RV. My post was in response to gangstadawg's. And yes, it was silly.


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## RedVelvet (Sep 26, 2007)

Santaclear said:


> It's um, "satire", RV. My post was in response to gangstadawg's. And yes, it was silly.



Well Gosh....as fan of satire and not exactly stupid.....forgive me for not seeing the Stephen Colbert of it all...


I am....touchy about gay hate....my bad.


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## cute_obese_girl (Sep 26, 2007)

Santaclear said:


> It's um, "satire", RV. My post was in response to gangstadawg's. And yes, it was silly.



Don't worry. I saw what you were doing there. I'm sure he's so sexy, men can't keep their hands off him


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## bmann0413 (Sep 26, 2007)

Well, it's kinda hard for me to approach girls anyways... Not to mention, I'm not much of a conversationalist... yeah, I know... I'm a dork... lol


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## Blackjack (Sep 26, 2007)

Santaclear said:


> To return for a moment to gangstadawg's gay analogy, let's say JoyJoy and I are mingling and a gay guy approaches us, attracted by my ass. He just can't stay away. :batting: Can't help himself, he says, 'cos I'm so fine and hot and so on. He wants it _so_ bad, you see.
> 
> But JoyJoy and I are mingling so we say to him, "excuse me, buddy," trying to get him to back off. But he won't back off. He can't help it, like so many others. :batting: See, I'm wearing those jeans that make my ass look so cute. :smitten: It's so hot. :wubu: Oh. Oh. oh. Oh...oh! Oh!!  OH!
> 
> So do we call the cops and wait for them to arrive? :bow: Or just deck the guy.



This post was so awesome I am want buttsecks with you long time.


----------



## Jes (Sep 26, 2007)

Still a Skye fan said:


> I'm trying again but haven't had anything good happen yet.
> 
> 
> Dennis



You don't say...

When your list of things you're not doing is potentially longer than your list of things you ARE doing...

I think some people don't actively want to meet other people, and I think that's ok. I have most certainly been in that boat myself. But things like not drinking meaning you can't go into bars is nonsensical to me. Many bars serve food and you can go there for dinner or a snack. Half the time I go to a bar, now, I have sodie pop (not always by choice, but I have some meds that make drinking not the best idea in the world). I've met a good number of people in bars, especially by going to my local with some regularity, even if it's just once a month. I'm not saying it's easy, but I am saying it's a muscle you need to flex. A lot.


----------



## Tad (Sep 26, 2007)

Still a Skye fan said:


> Sorry...I don't drink enough a year to warrant going into a bar, let alone trying to meet a woman I find attractive in one.
> 
> Seeking out women in grocery stores just seems strange and I've no desire to do it.
> 
> ...



Whoa guy--is there nothing that you like doing that ever has you meeting people? 

I do agree that basically if you never want to mingle with people with your best bet is on-line, as presumably that would be the best place to find someone else who doesn't like dealing with people face to face.....but then will the two of you be able to stand each other?

On the other hand, if you do have interests where you deal with people, maybe you can leverage those to meet some interesting ladies. I think Ashmama's post above really hit the nail on the head. Go out and DO things, things that you enjoy, where you are yourself. That is your best chance of meeting someone who appreciates you when you are yourself, doing what you like doing.

-Ed


----------



## CuteyChubb (Sep 26, 2007)

Where ever you go, just go. When you see the pretty fat chick, strike up the conversation. You can do it. You really can.


----------



## Jes (Sep 26, 2007)

edx said:


> I do agree that basically if you never want to mingle with people with your best bet is on-line, as presumably that would be the best place to find someone else who doesn't like dealing with people face to face.....but then will the two of you be able to stand each other?
> 
> -Ed


SO IMPORTANT. Everyone read it again, please. It took me awhile to realize this b/c I'm very social and I assumed other people were the same, especially if they were looking to meet other people (platonic or romantic/sexual). Then I learned other people are not like me. That was an eye opener.


----------



## gangstadawg (Sep 26, 2007)

cute_obese_girl said:


> Don't worry. I saw what you were doing there. I'm sure he's so sexy, men can't keep their hands off him


umm no male has touched me in a inappropriate manner (with the exception of punching or pushing but that was back in high school) and that wouldnt happen with me. but i have seen shit like that. like i said before my gay uncle (from st louis) is unfortunatly like this with people in public, NO JOKE. and thats why i wont ride with him to show him around detroit.
my uncle at the very minimum is a sexual harassment charge waiting to happen at the max he is bullet fodder here in detroit (we have a REALLY high number of gun crimes for whatever reason). and also like i said before he already got socked in his jaw in a super market here in detroit for inappropriate touching of another person and security at the market tossed him out.
now am i saying that all gay males are like that? no that would be stereotyping and pure ignorance. am i saying that there are a few "bad apples" in the bunch (for example my uncle). yes i am but then thats life.

now back to our regularly scheduled thread.


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## ReallyNiceFellow (Sep 26, 2007)

CuteyChubb said:


> Where ever you go, just go. When you see the pretty fat chick, strike up the conversation. You can do it. You really can.



Generally, I find it pretty easy to strike up a conversation with people, often just for the sake of a little social interaction. I travel alot, and I know there are lots of women who travel alot for work, too. I see them sitting alone at tables in the restaurant, just like me, and I wonder if they are as lonely as I am.

But I often refrain from approaching someone who I find attractive because of that whole rejection thing. Usually I just don't know what to say, and on the few times I have approached a woman, I've felt awkwqrd and clumsy. On the other hand, sometimes the situation just lends itself to a chance to share a common experience, like waiting too long for an elevator, or standing in line at the airport, discovering that our flight has been cancelled until tomorrow. 

I wonder if some women are so unused to being approached that they right away think I'm some sort of wierdo.


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## bigplaidpants (Sep 26, 2007)

Forgive a married FA for butting in. This wasn't lost on me:



> .....I'd like to see you closet single FA's come out of your closet....



But, I hoped I could say:

I'm actually frustrated by this whole FA internet vs. real world gap myself. (And, no, I'm not trying to claim any bbw angst, here. I just, perhaps, resonate.) For one, I DO think the internet vs real world issue gets in the way. As Jes at least alluded to, the internet is a completely different place than real life. The rules and risks are diff'rnt. The same personality won't be the same in both venues, and maybe that's OK. That said, however, I would like to see more FA's be confident in their erotics, give fat women the respect they would any other made-for-TV hottie, and treat them like the queens they are no matter how things turn out. Fat or not, a positive self-image, especially body-image, is hard won in this world. Correct me if I'm wrong. Fat and female only make it harder (present exceptions noted). I'm not going down the road of BBW's need FA's for self-esteem and self-confidence, anymore than a woman needs a man to have sex. But, come on. Self-confidence and self-respect are two way communicators. You give off what you got. In the real world, I'd like to see a place more like Dim where FA's and fat folk lift up each other, personal gain or not.

I know its a lot more complicated than that, but....um....yeah.


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## Dravenhawk (Sep 28, 2007)

I think I am going to see the silkscreener in town and have a black shirt with 12 inch tall white bold letters that read

FA

Perhaps you BBWs need to come out from hiding wear something revealing to tempt the FA

Dravenhawk


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## RedVelvet (Sep 28, 2007)

Dravenhawk said:


> Perhaps you BBWs need to come out from hiding wear something revealing to tempt the FA
> 
> Dravenhawk




Sure.....send me a copy of your bank statement and a picture of your penis I will get right on that.


----------



## mossystate (Sep 28, 2007)

I am stalking RveeJ..she is on point this eve..bahahahahahahaha...funny..yet...so...right on...


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## RedVelvet (Sep 28, 2007)

mossystate said:


> I am stalking RveeJ..she is on point this eve..bahahahahahahaha...funny..yet...so...right on...



awwww....

I stalk you too.

ahahahahahahah


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## gypsy (Sep 29, 2007)

gangstadawg said:


> well the glbt have rainbows. FAs have........ well nothing. saome one needs to get started and think one up.



How about the donning of a lovely rutabaga as a male fashion accessory?


----------



## gypsy (Sep 29, 2007)

gangstadawg said:


> not exactly the same thing since its dishonerable to hit a woman but if a gay guy tries to flirt then let him no your straight but if he doesnt take no for an answer then its time to kick it up a notch. if he he touches you and its by law classified as harrasment then its time to give him a good uppercut.



Sure it is... but I know a lot of gay men who would rather just take the beating silently rather than risk having their sexual lives dropped in the laps of people that might already have a bias against them (ie - cops, judges, doctors, media people....)

There are guys who can honestly just tell someone no thank you, I'm not interested... but I've found 9 times out of 10 that most men take great offense to another man finding them attractive. Idiotic, but true.


----------



## gypsy (Sep 29, 2007)

Still a Skye fan said:


> Sorry...I don't drink enough a year to warrant going into a bar, let alone trying to meet a woman I find attractive in one.
> 
> Seeking out women in grocery stores just seems strange and I've no desire to do it.
> 
> ...



That's it. You need a dog. Then you can have a reason to go to a leash free park, a stroll through the neighbourhood, or you can just sit on a park bench with your canine friend and see who you start conversations with. Don't want a pet? Goof suggested volunteering some time at an animal shelter. Your problem is solved. Now, go down to the local SPCA and pick up a cute friend. It's a win/win situation.


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## gypsy (Sep 29, 2007)

RedVelvet said:


> Sure.....send me a copy of your bank statement and a picture of your penis I will get right on that.



DAMMIT!!!!

"You must spread some reputation around before giving it to RedVelvet again"


----------



## Dr. Feelgood (Sep 29, 2007)

I repped her for you.


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## Rowan (Sep 29, 2007)

y'all and your dang rep..i feel so inadequate with my three tiny cans. LOL


----------



## gangstadawg (Sep 29, 2007)

gypsy said:


> How about the donning of a lovely rutabaga as a male fashion accessory?


no veggies even though i love em. at least you didnt say a sign that says "beef its whats for dinner"


----------



## Jack Skellington (Sep 30, 2007)

RedVelvet said:


> Sure.....send me a copy of your bank statement and a picture of your penis I will get right on that.



I actually would but both are really too small to bother with.

Thank you! I'll be here all week. Next week too if people complain enough.


----------



## Jes (Sep 30, 2007)

RedVelvet said:


> awwww....
> 
> I stalk you too.
> 
> ahahahahahahah



i know this will break your heart, but you're way too skinny for him. waaay. in fact, you and mossy together probably are, too.


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## Keb (Oct 1, 2007)

Please mingle, guys? It really does make my day to get a sincere compliment, even if I don't know you. In fact, I think it makes most people's days, if they're not creeped out about it or overloaded in compliments to the point they all seem insincere.


----------



## mossystate (Oct 1, 2007)

Jes said:


> i know this will break your heart, but you're way too skinny for him. waaay. in fact, you and mossy together probably are, too.



doubt it..but..does not matter..at....all


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## Jes (Oct 1, 2007)

mossystate said:


> doubt it..but..does not matter..at....all



typical skinny girl attitude!

*harumph*

You know what's interesting? My involvement with a local bbw group--for men and women (obviously, the men would be there for their interest in the women). SOmeone worked hard to organize events that were very reasonably priced, centrally located, and fun for different age groups and both genders (bowling, meat-related restaurants, happy hours). A good number of guys joined the group. And none came. At all. Event after event. 

So here we were, a group full of fat women, very open to the idea of meeting men who liked fat women, local, all assembled beforehand, just add water and...

no men.

Which, frankly, I don't understand in the least. In the least. If your target audience is assembled someplace, and you're trying to sell something (you...or your penis, at the very least), wouldn't you just take that next step and appear? A few of you, at least? 

Are men far less social than I even realized? What gives?

are we supposed to zoom through your 'net connection into your bedroom and touch your peener?


----------



## RedVelvet (Oct 1, 2007)

Jes said:


> are we supposed to zoom through your 'net connection into your bedroom and touch your peener?




I am almost entirely convinced that _that_ is the dominant fantasy..


----------



## mossystate (Oct 1, 2007)

Jes said:


> typical skinny girl attitude!
> 
> *harumph*
> 
> ...


----------



## Blackjack (Oct 1, 2007)

mossystate said:


> Jes said:
> 
> 
> > typical skinny girl attitude!
> ...



Hey, you leave the Doc outta this.


----------



## Tad (Oct 1, 2007)

Jes said:


> So here we were, a group full of fat women, very open to the idea of meeting men who liked fat women, local, all assembled beforehand, just add water and...
> 
> no men.
> 
> ...



1) Overall, I agree: what's up with that? 

2) On the other hand, I think guys are maybe less social than you realized, and certainly more sexually shy than most women credit. That is, sure, when a guy is hanging with a bunch of other guys he may be full of bravado and jokes about his prowess. When sufficiently drunk he may be willing to make the most ridiculous come ons to women he's never met. But the number of guys willing to go somewhere aimed at socializing with single women they could be interested in, I think is lower. See, not that they don't want to hook up with said women, but to get to know a bunch of them, then try to negotiate a relationship with one of them in, essentially, full view of the others? A pile of drawbacks, like: everyone sees if he flames out, he has to deal with the female group social dynamic so could easily be a for a rough ride, if he picks one to focus on he implicitly rejects the others yet has to keep dealing with them--and if then things fall through with the first what are his chances with the others, and so on.

Now, I'm a big believer in getting to know more people as being the best way to get romance going, so I'm disappointed that guys didn't show up, I don't think those obstacles are all that dire. But I'm not single, so it is easy for me to say I wouldn't be put off, I'm in no danger of having that situation presented to me. And I am saying I could imagine guys getting scared off, which I guess means I can see having those feelings to some degree. 

Actually, I'm not quite sure what I'm saying anymore. I think I had a point, but I didn't get enough sleep last night and I've lost what it was now.

Yay for stream of consciousness replies!

-Ed


----------



## Jes (Oct 1, 2007)

So all the guys got scared off? All of them? 

Why, then, did they join a social group, the point of which was to meet up in the flesh (hence the title: MeetUp)? 

In terms of trying to navigate a flirtation with other people around--welcome to the universe. They were invited to join a group of women who had the physical attributes they admired and who were very open to meeting them. And the women in the group bore the same set of issues, in terms of navigating flirtations in a group,right? The only difference here is that the women showed up. 

How incredibly lame.


----------



## fatgirlflyin (Oct 1, 2007)

Jes said:


> So all the guys got scared off? All of them?
> 
> Why, then, did they join a social group, the point of which was to meet up in the flesh (hence the title: MeetUp)?
> 
> ...




Is it an online group? If yes then most of them probably joined to scan through the pictures hoping to score some nudies. Others probably go through the list looking for women to instant message and get something going one on one.


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## mossystate (Oct 1, 2007)

I am now...officially...sick and tired of excuses made by some of the supposed admirers of fat women....sometimes, there does not need to be all the analyzing..sometimes, some people are just looking for what is easy, with no thought of the human being on the other side of the monitor, who is, of course, supposed to be mama earth...forever...eh....nope..


----------



## Tad (Oct 1, 2007)

Jes said:


> So all the guys got scared off? All of them?
> 
> Why, then, did they join a social group, the point of which was to meet up in the flesh (hence the title: MeetUp)?
> 
> ...



Im obviously even more tired than I realized, because I totally forgot my usual disclaimers. So, to be clear: I didnt say this was what happened, I was just offering ideas. Not very coherently I admit. Im not a professor of male socialization, Im not teaching a class, so I dont expect anyone to think I have the answers. I was just looking at a situation which did not seem to make any sense, and trying to find an explanation which fits the evidenceboth what you described and what I know of how guys tend to operate. Id give it about as much credence as the explanation for why there are so many mosquitoes this year offered by the old guy at the hardware store who is selling you bug spray. I guess calling a suggestion lame over the internet does not raise the same risk of snarling service next that such a response would draw from the hardware clerk, but it sure suggests that you are not exactly encouraging discussion of the issue.

Id point out too that no matter what explanation is offered up, they all have to deal with the issue that women showed up, and men didnt. Further, from what Ive heard of a lot of BBW social groups, this is pretty typical (few or no guys compared to the number of women). So it is not the guys of Philadelphia getting together and deciding that they all want to make Jes life difficult--it is some more general dynamic at work. 

-Ed


----------



## RedVelvet (Oct 1, 2007)

I would find a social group hard myself.....I vastly prefer meeting someone one on one..


Also...men....like deer, rabbits, squirrels and other unflattering animal comparisons.... spook easily.


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## Jes (Oct 1, 2007)

it's a MeetUp. The group is organized online, but there's no real interaction there. The point is to organize in the flesh events. Think of it like Evite.

crazy, i tell ya!

and yes, i definitely did get a private message or 2, from guys trying to separate me from the herd, I guess (no offense meant by 'herd.')


----------



## Jes (Oct 1, 2007)

edx said:


> I’m obviously even more tired than I realized, because I totally forgot my usual disclaimers. So, to be clear: I didn’t say this was what happened, I was just offering ideas. Not very coherently I admit. I’m not a professor of male socialization, I’m not teaching a class, so I don’t expect anyone to think I have the answers. I was just looking at a situation which did not seem to make any sense, and trying to find an explanation which fits the evidence—both what you described and what I know of how guys tend to operate. I’d give it about as much credence as the explanation for why there are so many mosquitoes this year offered by the old guy at the hardware store who is selling you bug spray. I guess calling a suggestion &#8216;lame’ over the internet does not raise the same risk of snarling service next that such a response would draw from the hardware clerk, but it sure suggests that you are not exactly encouraging discussion of the issue.
> 
> I’d point out too that no matter what explanation is offered up, they all have to deal with the issue that women showed up, and men didn’t. Further, from what I’ve heard of a lot of BBW social groups, this is pretty typical (few or no guys compared to the number of women). So it is not the guys of Philadelphia getting together and deciding that they all want to make Jes’ life difficult--it is some more general dynamic at work.
> 
> -Ed



Yes, Ed, I get that, Ed. I'm fully aware of that, Ed. Nor do I think that's what happened, Ed.

Did it ever cross your mind that I was calling the actions of the guys in question lame? Or did you just assume I was calling you lame? Have we not been around this mulberry bush at least 10 times now, Ed? I'm pretty much done with it, I'm not a social worker.


----------



## Jes (Oct 1, 2007)

RedVelvet said:


> I would find a social group hard myself.....I vastly prefer meeting someone one on one..
> 
> 
> Also...men....like deer, rabbits, squirrels and other unflattering animal comparisons.... spook easily.



I get that. But then I'd imagine you wouldn't join a group, right?


----------



## Carrie (Oct 1, 2007)

Jes said:


> (no offense meant by 'herd.')


Too late! I already mooed.


----------



## Jes (Oct 1, 2007)

Carrie said:


> Too late! I already mooed.



I thought you bleated?? No?


----------



## Carrie (Oct 1, 2007)

Jes said:


> I thought you bleated?? No?


Naah.  .


----------



## RedVelvet (Oct 1, 2007)

Jes said:


> I get that. But then I'd imagine you wouldn't join a group, right?





Er........that seems a loaded statement. What are you saying underneath that?


My saying that I prefer one-on-one doesnt make me anti group...just saying what makes me feel comfortable.

I have TRIED groups...found the women hostile and the men....well....not worth the effort.

Which sucks....I would LOVE to find a group I liked...I used to have a wide, wide circle of friends and everyone is all grown up and off....and I miss it a lot.


----------



## RedVelvet (Oct 1, 2007)

Jes said:


> Yes, Ed, I get that, Ed. I'm fully aware of that, Ed. Nor do I think that's what happened, Ed.
> 
> Did it ever cross your mind that I was calling the actions of the guys in question lame? Or did you just assume I was calling you lame? Have we not been around this mulberry bush at least 10 times now, Ed? I'm pretty much done with it, I'm not a social worker.




It's subtle, but I am smelling hostility here...somehow.


----------



## Jes (Oct 1, 2007)

RedVelvet said:


> Er........that seems a loaded statement. What are you saying underneath that?
> 
> .



I'm saying underneath exactly what I'm saying on top. I get that you're less into the group thing, and so you would most likely not join a group to meet people. Just like I would guess, looking at the facts, that someone who did join a group to socialize in person was looking to socialize in person with a group. RIght? I mean, that does seem logical, unless I'm batshit crazy. Which is what I keep coming back to with this situation. A good number of women signed up for the group, and a lot of them couldn't, or didn't, make the events. That's normal, absolutely. Any planner knows this. But I was truly surprised at the fact that men never, ever made it. Perhaps I'm naive--and now I know better, certainly, having had this experience. I wouldn't have guessed people would willingly join up with a group for socializing in person to never socialize in person with a group. 

I'm looking to Carrie to be the voice (or should I say noise) of reason, here. For some kooky reason.


----------



## RedVelvet (Oct 1, 2007)

Jes said:


> I'm saying underneath exactly what I'm saying on top. I get that you're less into the group thing, and so you would most likely not join a group to meet people. Just like I would guess, looking at the facts, that someone who did join a group to socialize in person was looking to socialize in person with a group. RIght? I mean, that does seem logical, unless I'm batshit crazy. Which is what I keep coming back to with this situation. A good number of women signed up for the group, and a lot of them couldn't, or didn't, make the events. That's normal, absolutely. Any planner knows this. But I was truly surprised at the fact that men never, ever made it. Perhaps I'm naive--and now I know better, certainly, having had this experience. I wouldn't have guessed people would willingly join up with a group for socializing in person to never socialize in person with a group.
> 
> I'm looking to Carrie to be the voice (or should I say noise) of reason, here. For some kooky reason.





Ok...ok..I get it. I thought it was some sort of personal dig at me.....but I was wrong...my bad.

YES...one would think people who join groups based on their expressed purpose would follow through.......

But alas.....much like internet personals, etc.......you have to shovel just vast amounts of shite to find the ponies....and many many people just have their own creepy little agendas.

I also present myself as I am online....no BS....or misleading anything.....I tend to expect the others....and am often disappointed...

thats ok tho.......occasionally...you find a Palomino!


----------



## Jes (Oct 1, 2007)

RedVelvet said:


> Ok...ok..I get it. I thought it was some sort of personal dig at me.....but I was wrong...my bad.
> 
> YES...one would think people who join groups based on their expressed purpose would follow through.......
> 
> ...


Yes, I think this is very true. I think the point I'm at, now, is that while I know my take on the world isn't exactly right, I don't know all of the ways it isn't, and I'm having to find them out one by one, and that exercise can be really maddening at times. 
Creepy little agendas made me laugh. I think one guy who contacted me had one--no matter how many events I invited him to, he kept playing the dumb and confused card. "Oh, you all went bowling LAST Saturday? Too bad I missed it! How about we go bowling this weekend, just the 2 of us?" No thanks, crazy eddie!
And no, no personal dig. I have no reason to do that.


----------



## Tad (Oct 1, 2007)

mossystate said:


> I am now...officially...sick and tired of excuses made by some of the supposed admirers of fat women....sometimes, there does not need to be all the analyzing..sometimes, some people are just looking for what is easy, with no thought of the human being on the other side of the monitor, who is, of course, supposed to be mama earth...forever...eh....nope..



I can see three ways of approaching the reality of what some of you are experiencing:

1) Deny that your observations are valid, and claim that there are plenty of FA for all BBW, and you aren't looking in the right places/hard enough/something.

2) Agree that your observations are seeing something, but claim that it must be local variations, the industry in which you work, or something else like that. 

3) Agree that your observations are valid, and claim that these observations identify a pattern which can be understood, within the limits of understanding any behavior amongst humans, variable lot that we are.

(Well, I guess that there is a fourth as well:

4) Agree that your observations are valid, claim that these observation identify a pattern, but deny that it is possible to understand that pattern. 

I don't like to admit to four, because I hate to think people would dismiss the possibility of understanding something before attempting to understand it).

Myself, I'm a proponent of number 3. I think the observations are fairly consistent over geography and time, and do indicate some general trends and patterns. I'd love to see some properly structured experiments looking into these patterns. Failing that, I think the best that is possible to is advance some hypothesis, and examine it against the available evidence to see if it appears consistent. If it does, it is not necessarily correct, but at least it becomes a useful predictor (You can model lights as things which attract and destroy darkness rays, and quite accurately model the world. We are pretty sure that model is incorrect, but if it were the only model you had and you wanted to know how to brighten a certain room, it would work just fine).

If people have hypothesis that cast general, group, FA behavior in more positive terms, I'd love to hear them. But if the behavior seems cowardly and weaselly, I think the simplest possible explanation is that FA on average will behave in a cowardly and weaselly manner. I'm not claiming that it is a correct hypothesis, but it seems like the one to be examined first, even if it makes me pretty darned uncomfortable as a male FA.

Regards;

-Ed


----------



## Jack Skellington (Oct 1, 2007)

RedVelvet said:


> Also...men....like deer, rabbits, squirrels and other unflattering animal comparisons.... spook easily.



Some really do. There are men that only get some balls when they are in packs. Otherwise they are scared shitless of looking out of place and live in absolute fear of other men finding out what they like when it's not popular.


----------



## RedVelvet (Oct 1, 2007)

Jack Skellington said:


> Some really do. There are men that only get some balls when they are in packs. Otherwise they are scared shitless of looking out of place and live in absolute fear of other men finding out what they like when it's not popular.




Thats almost heartbreaking.

It would be heartbreaking...but then I realized I have no compassion for the deeply cowardly.

For every man who ever simply liked what he liked with out concern of others....for every guy who shows up when he says he is going to...for every honorable man......I salute you. 

I have met you.......and you are easy to spot, if rare....


My adorable friend Dennis (a big out FA, BTW....) says it all the time..."I LOVE men! I love their every venal, cowardly, selfish move! I love them! I lOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE them! They help funnel all the cute fat girls to me! Yay Me!"


----------



## Carrie (Oct 1, 2007)

Jes said:


> I'm looking to Carrie to be the voice (or should I say noise) of reason, here. For some kooky reason.


Yikes, woman, I can barely pull this off on days when I've NOT been staring at a wretched spreadsheet all day; I'm complete pants today. 

But thanks for the vote of confidence.


----------



## Sandie_Zitkus (Oct 1, 2007)

Jes to put this as simply as possible (not because I think you're stupid) - this is just the way it is. 17 years ago or so I helped run a BBW group that held dances in Philly. It was always 80% - 90% women. The woman who ran the group would only get men to come out if she let them get in for free. I think it stinks. I think men let their buddies tell them who to date more than women do. 

I don't know how else to say it. You either have to accept it and get together to socialize or not accept it and be angry all the time.

BTW - my skinny girlfriends who are single complain about the same thing.


----------



## Jes (Oct 1, 2007)

Sandie_Zitkus said:


> BTW - my skinny girlfriends who are single complain about the same thing.



Yes, I don't doubt that this is true and it's a good point.


----------



## RedVelvet (Oct 1, 2007)

Sometimes I wish I were a better lesbian.


Its crap like this that makes me think....you know...maybe a reconciliation.....might be great..yeah...I mean.....compared to whats out there.......My ex is fucking....well...near perfect, really. The ending of this relationship was not about fundamentals.....but bad timing and poor priorities...

Boy......last few weeks have been throwing me for a loop.


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## JoyJoy (Oct 1, 2007)

Dravenhawk said:


> Perhaps you BBWs need to come out from hiding wear something revealing to tempt the FA
> 
> Dravenhawk


 Were we ignoring this line? If so, I just blew it...sorry, ladies. I got my toe stuck in my fishnet catsuit as I was getting ready to go to the grocery store and hit my head. I would have come to sooner but my tube top had cut off the circulation to my arms and they went numb for a bit. By the time I was lucid again, I had completely lost track of where we were on this thread. I swear, this makes me glad I'm not single anymore....trying to tempt an FA can be dangerous.


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## RedVelvet (Oct 1, 2007)

JoyJoy said:


> Were we ignoring this line? If so, I just blew it...sorry, ladies. I got my toe stuck in my fishnet catsuit as I was getting ready to go to the grocery store and hit my head. I would have come to sooner but my tube top had cut off the circulation to my arms and they went numb for a bit. By the time I was lucid again, I had completely lost track of where we were on this thread. I swear, this makes me glad I'm not single anymore....trying to tempt an FA can be dangerous.




Nope...see my first comment..


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## mossystate (Oct 1, 2007)

Joy ( well her name will be changed to Happiness ) will now be featured in a story. I will be able to say...hey, I know that temptress..I will feel that special kind of giddy that comes from being familiar with a woman who is oh so giving when being all that any FA deserves....she is my hero....

oh..and...no RveeJ was on the case, straight away


*eta..oh..there she is..


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## Jes (Oct 1, 2007)

JoyJoy said:


> Were we ignoring this line? .



naw, it was just too crazy for more than a passing glance, really.

www.cuckoo.com


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## Sandie_Zitkus (Oct 1, 2007)

JoyJoy said:


> Were we ignoring this line? If so, I just blew it...sorry, ladies. I got my toe stuck in my fishnet catsuit as I was getting ready to go to the grocery store and hit my head. I would have come to sooner but my tube top had cut off the circulation to my arms and they went numb for a bit. By the time I was lucid again, I had completely lost track of where we were on this thread. I swear, this makes me glad I'm not single anymore....trying to tempt an FA can be dangerous.




Well what always worked for me was to take off my top and shake my titties at the FA. How do you think I got Wayne's attention.


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## JoyJoy (Oct 1, 2007)

RedVelvet said:


> Nope...see my first comment..



Ohh..see what did I tell you?? I was totally out of it and passed right over your post. Forgive me, please. 



mossystate said:


> Joy ( well her name will be changed to Happiness ) will now be featured in a story. I will be able to say...hey, I know that temptress..I will feel that special kind of giddy that comes from being familiar with a woman who is oh so giving when being all that any FA deserves....she is my hero....
> 
> oh..and...no RveeJ was on the case, straight away
> 
> ...


 I'm waiting for my cape in the mail. I hope it matches the cat suit.


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## Jack Skellington (Oct 1, 2007)

RedVelvet said:


> Sometimes I wish I were a better lesbian.



Maybe you need more practice?  

I kid!! I kid!!


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## bmann0413 (Oct 1, 2007)

Sandie_Zitkus said:


> Well what always worked for me was to take off my top and shake my titties at the FA. How do you think I got Wayne's attention.



Yeah, I'd see how that'll work... lol

But like I said, it's hard for me to do it because I'm not much of a conversationalist and I don't really have much confidence to approach a really cute girl... I still have trouble talking to some of the cute girls I actually know...


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## Jes (Oct 2, 2007)

bmann0413 said:


> Yeah, I'd see how that'll work... lol
> 
> But like I said, it's hard for me to do it because I'm not much of a conversationalist and I don't really have much confidence to approach a really cute girl... I still have trouble talking to some of the cute girls I actually know...



Would you feel more comfortable in a group? Mixed with men/women? So that it's not so 1 on 1 unless you want it to be?


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## bmann0413 (Oct 2, 2007)

I don't know... I never thought about it. I might feel more comfortable in a group. I never really gave it a try... I'm just about the shyest outgoing person you might ever meet. I like to be in a group, but I'm usually staying to myself...


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