# Different types of F/FAs?



## Shh! Don’t tell! (Apr 17, 2020)

I was just thinking that when people say fat on here, they’re often thinking of very different body shapes and sizes. Like, I just like all sizes of paunch, even a very small, slight one and don’t like the all over “soft fat” look at all, but some people seem to be the exact opposite. What’s the deal with that? Is it even the same preference/fetish?


----------



## landshark (Apr 17, 2020)

I think it just just depends on the person’s preference. For example, I have a General shape I prefer, size itself is secondary. A woman who packs both...

I generally prefer: big butt, followed by big or just soft belly, followed by boobs. That combo can be a short little “petite fat” girl or it can be my 350 pound wife. If I had to choose one of the other, I do prefer the size, all other things being equal.

and ultimately I think it’s also important to gauge where tolerances lie when considered against who the person is. I hope I never have to explore this, but I’ve asked myself if I were ever on the market again, would I pass on someone who was otherwise a good fit, but was more athletic, could do some of the same activities I can, etc. would I pass if she wasn’t fat? I would likely pursue only fat women, but I also believe sometimes something can come out of nowhere and I wonder how I’d respond.

And I do hope I never find out!


----------



## Shh! Don’t tell! (Apr 17, 2020)

happily_married said:


> I think it just just depends on the person’s preference. For example, I have a General shape I prefer, size itself is secondary. A woman who packs both...
> 
> I generally prefer: big butt, followed by big or just soft belly, followed by boobs. That combo can be a short little “petite fat” girl or it can be my 350 pound wife. If I had to choose one of the other, I do prefer the size, all other things being equal.
> 
> ...



I think it’s fine to have a strong physical preference. I have many, not just for weight. Also, thinner doesn’t always mean more athletic and energetic. I personally wear out very quickly and slightly chubby people seem to usually have more energy then I do.


----------



## landshark (Apr 17, 2020)

Shh! Don’t tell! said:


> I think it’s fine to have a strong physical preference. I have many, not just for weight. Also, thinner doesn’t always mean more athletic and energetic. I personally wear out very quickly and slightly chubby people seem to usually have more energy then I do.



I agree: strong physical preference is okay, even a necessity. Like I said, for me it’s a basic shape, and if I can get that basic shape @~350 pounds even better.

But I’m also pretty inclusive. I’ve pursued women who didn’t bad big backsides, but we’re more top heavy. I’ve had partners who were white, black, Hispanic, Native American, Indian, and Asian. And of course, not all of them were fat.

So my point is while I have a strong preference, it’s not a non-negotiable proposition. This is why I’m able to support my wife when she loses weight: it’s about her first and second I’m actually pretty flexible.


----------



## Corey (Apr 18, 2020)

‘Fat’ and all/most fat things in general will make my ears perk up. I swear I can hear the word ‘fat’ or words related to it from across a crowded room as if someone had whispered it into my ear. However, in terms of being sexually (hypothetically speaking) attracted to a fat guy, it really does depend on the over all aesthetic. Putting the emotional aspect of my attraction aside, I’m typically drawn to the belly that looks firm and rounded, but is soft to the touch. For the other body parts, I like a more broad type build with a longer torso. Chicken legs are a no go. Give me all the muscle, big boned, beefy type stuff. And a nice big squishy bubble butt. Shiiiiit.


----------



## landshark (Apr 18, 2020)

So true, @Corey i don’t think I made that part of about the overall aesthetic clear. And I think that’s part of why my preferences are so broad: I can find a lot of different makes and models attractive.

On the reality of dating a SSBBW thread I recently compared two of the first plus size women I’d ever been with. One was over 6’ tall, African American, likely a little over 300 pounds (hard to say because of her height) and her personality was cool. She was stylish and didn’t step out of her apartment unless she was put together.

The other one was white, 5’2 or so, about 360 pounds, not that “cool” left her home in whatever was most comfortable for her, etc. These women couldn’t have been more different. What they had in common To me was I thought they were both just stunning.

The thought of being with either of them excited me, and sometimes the memories of them both still does.

In other news...

At work yesterday two ladies who work near my office got into a discussion on celebrities who lose weight. Adele came up as an example. Anyway these two ladies are both in their 50s or so, neither are BBWs but neither are especially fit. Anyway I perked up at their conversation and since it was slow and half the normal crew is out I listened in and inadvertently became the subject of a short debate between them!

They shifted to guys who like big girls and at one point, one of them looked at me and said, “I bet H_M likes the soft bodies, he seems like that kind of guy.” The other countered “as much as he works out I think he probably likes active ladies.” Neither have met my wife, obviously.

I’ve often wondered if I have “chubby chaser” written across my forehead because sometimes it seems bigger girls hone in on me, even before I grow flirty. (I acknowledge there are unlimited other explanations for this aside from their chubby chaser radar being on high alert.) anyway I haven’t ever, while at the office, indicated to either of these two what my preferences are. And one just somehow guessed it. I’m telling you...we chubby chasers give off a signal of some kind!


----------



## Barrett (Apr 18, 2020)

Corey said:


> ‘Fat’ and all/most fat things in general will make my ears perk up. I swear I can hear the word ‘fat’ or words related to it from across a crowded room as if someone had whispered it into my ear. However, in terms of being sexually (hypothetically speaking) to a fat guy, it really does depend on the over all aesthetic. Putting the emotional aspect of my attraction aside, I’m typically drawn to the belly that looks firm and rounded, but is soft to the touch. For the other body parts, I like a more broad type build with a longer torso. Chicken legs are a no go. Give me all the muscle, big boned, beefy type stuff. And a nice big squishy bubble butt. Shiiiiit.



Fat...


----------



## Shh! Don’t tell! (Apr 18, 2020)

Corey said:


> ‘Fat’ and all/most fat things in general will make my ears perk up. I swear I can hear the word ‘fat’ or words related to it from across a crowded room as if someone had whispered it into my ear. However, in terms of being sexually (hypothetically speaking) to a fat guy, it really does depend on the over all aesthetic. Putting the emotional aspect of my attraction aside, I’m typically drawn to the belly that looks firm and rounded, but is soft to the touch. For the other body parts, I like a more broad type build with a longer torso. Chicken legs are a no go. Give me all the muscle, big boned, beefy type stuff. And a nice big squishy bubble butt. Shiiiiit.



I’m actually a-okay with chicken legs and weak arms and pancake butt. Sometimes I feel like the only person in the world who likes that. Muscle just isn’t very appealing to me, not sure why.


----------



## landshark (Apr 18, 2020)

Shh! Don’t tell! said:


> I’m actually a-okay with chicken legs and weak arms and pancake butt. Sometimes I feel like the only person in the world who likes that. Muscle just isn’t very appealing to me, not sure why.



Does it matter? Why do any of us have the preferences we do? Why do you like this food and not that? Why do you prefer this kind of car over that kind? What makes one type of climate appealing to you and another not so much?

Preference isn’t always rational. It just is what it is, and you can’t always explain it. I don’t bother trying.


----------



## Shh! Don’t tell! (Apr 18, 2020)

happily_married said:


> Does it matter? Why do any of us have the preferences we do? Why do you like this food and not that? Why do you prefer this kind of car over that kind? What makes one type of climate appealing to you and another not so much?
> 
> Preference isn’t always rational. It just is what it is, and you can’t always explain it. I don’t bother trying.



It doesn’t really matter, but it’s the type of thing that interests me. When I see variation like that among people I can’t help but try and figure out why it exists.


----------



## landshark (Apr 18, 2020)

Shh! Don’t tell! said:


> It doesn’t really matter, but it’s the type of thing that interests me. When I see variation like that among people I can’t help but try and figure out why it exists.



That’s fun, and I have an inquisitive mind too, so when I say I don’t bother trying to understand it, I mean I don’t agonize over it like I once did. I absolutely do look at two body types and muse on why I’m so much more attracted to one than the other.


----------



## Jaycee (Apr 18, 2020)

I'm drawn to the soft all over aesthetic, where they just look deliciously soft. To me it's both pleasurable and soothing to touch. Love handles and thick soft thighs will also catch my attention a mile away. I totally agree with @Corey on chicken legs they are definite nope for me as well. 

On muscle I do like muscle (preferably covered in a bit of nice soft fat though) that's mainly because I myself have a lot of muscle, but I like a man to be big and strong compared to me. And I love contrasting body types.


----------



## Metallicalover99 (Apr 18, 2020)

I love the "soft all over" look, but weight doesn't so much matter as their face, hair, and overall personality. I have been attracted to people anywhere from 230-500 pounds.


----------



## extra_m13 (Apr 18, 2020)

good topic for conversation, as with everything where the is variety there are different preferences. in my case... and that involves a lof of things. color. shape. size. attitudes. personality. i will try go at lenght here. because the community deserves it. y do prefer light brunette or white, figure wise, definitely bottom heavy and with a hint of a waist is more attractive to me than an apple with chicken legs and huge belly. active ? willing to be it at time for sure, but not a hyper active girl. a girl who enjoys her food and doesn't care about gaining, the worst combination is a girl that eats with fear, gain, gets depressed and eats more, not accepting her that love for food and lack of exercise will lead to gain weight. softnes.... some, but not this feeling of a water bag , cellulite thick legs, juicyjackie , plumpprincess are ideal, boberry, so pretty


----------



## John Smith (Apr 18, 2020)

I don't get it.


----------



## landshark (Apr 18, 2020)

John Smith said:


> I don't get it.



a record short post from you!


----------



## Corey (Apr 18, 2020)

The post is asking: If you had to choose between being a fugitive or a hamster, which would you choose to be? Personally, I would choose to be a fugitive, because then I’d have longer legs to explore the world with. But...if I knew I could have a hamster ball to roll around the world in, then I might choose that instead. This is so hard! I can’t choose. Anyone else having a hard time choosing between the two? Also, who knew hamster wasn’t spelled ‘hampster’? Certainly not I.

EDITED TO ADD:

Okay, I’ve figured it out. My final answer is...I would choose to be a fugitive WITH a hamster ball, or rather, a hampster ball. Come on guys, I can’t be the only one who didn’t know how to spell hamster.


----------



## landshark (Apr 18, 2020)

I actually did know how to spell it. “Hamster” sounds like it could be slang for a guy who likes big girls though so if that’s the case I’d rather be a hamster than a fugitive!


----------



## Shh! Don’t tell! (Apr 18, 2020)

I am a hamster who’s a fugitive


----------



## Corey (Apr 18, 2020)

Shh! Don’t tell! said:


> I am a hamster who’s a fugitive



Oh, now that’s a naughty hamster. What are you doing time for?


----------



## Corey (Apr 18, 2020)

happily_married said:


> I actually did know how to spell it. “Hamster” sounds like it could be slang for a guy who likes big girls though so if that’s the case I’d rather be a hamster than a fugitive!



We know why you like hamsters.


----------



## Corey (Apr 18, 2020)

happily_married said:


> I actually did know how to spell it. “Hamster” sounds like it could be slang for a guy who likes big girls though so if that’s the case I’d rather be a hamster than a fugitive!



Because they’re cute!


----------



## landshark (Apr 18, 2020)

Corey said:


> Because they’re cute!



just like me!


----------



## Shh! Don’t tell! (Apr 18, 2020)

Corey said:


> Oh, now that’s a naughty hamster. What are you doing time for?



Tax fraud


----------



## landshark (Apr 18, 2020)

Shh! Don’t tell! said:


> Tax fraud



you hardened criminal. No stimulus for you!


----------



## John Smith (Apr 19, 2020)

I simply don't get it.


----------



## Corey (Apr 19, 2020)

John Smith said:


> I simply don't get it.



It’s okay John. I don’t get things either, sometimes. Like, how come Pluto can’t talk, wears a collar, lives in a dog house in the backyard and is owned by Mickey Mouse?...While Goofy has his own house, gets to live life to the fullest and is allowed to be friends with Mickey and everyone else? No one has been able to answer my question since I was a kid, and Walt Disney won’t respond to my ouija board requests.


----------



## John Smith (Apr 19, 2020)

Corey said:


> It’s okay John. I don’t get things either, sometimes. Like, how come Pluto can’t talk, wears a collar, lives in a dog house in the backyard and is owned by Mickey Mouse?...While Goofy has his own house, gets to live life to the fullest and is allowed to be friends with Mickey and everyone else? No one has been able to answer my question since I was a kid, and Walt Disney won’t respond to my ouija board requests.



No, I simply don't get the subject of this topic. Is it complicated to explain it?


----------



## Corey (Apr 19, 2020)

John Smith said:


> No, I simply don't get the subject of this topic. Is it complicated to explain it?



I can try. The way I read it was @Shh! Don’t tell! mentioned that each fat admirer has a preference on what type of body is most attractive to them. Such as how fat is distributed, the texture of fat, the amount of it, etc. 

For example, I like a rounded belly that’s between soft and firm, as well as a plump bottom, sturdy legs and a broad look. But @Shh! stated that her belly preference ranges from a small paunch to a big belly, and she likes skinny legs and no muscle on a fat guy. Most fat admirers have a preference on what body shape is most attractive to them. You may have a body preference too- do you like apple shape, pear shape, hourglass shape, rectangle shape, etc on a woman? Or do you not have a preference?

Then she said that since everyone’s preference is so broad, she wondered if it was all considered the same fetish. In my opinion, it is, because fat is fat, but some fat is more attractive to me than others.


----------



## John Smith (Apr 19, 2020)

@Corey Thank you for your courtesy.


----------



## Corey (Apr 20, 2020)

John Smith said:


> @Corey Thank you for your courtesy.



Of course!


----------



## Blockierer (Apr 20, 2020)

I repeat what I alady wrote in an other thread. What has always fascinated me on SSBBWs was the incredibly ability to wobble with their fat bodies. I confess it's arousing to me. No midsize woman can wobble like a SSBBW does. Another point for me is the attention I receive when I'm with my SSBBW in public areas. I love it when people realize that I really love very fat women.


----------



## BigElectricKat (Apr 20, 2020)

I was going to chime in on this thread but thought better of it.


----------



## Shh! Don’t tell! (Apr 20, 2020)

BigElectricKat said:


> I was going to chime in on this thread but thought better of it.



well, now I’m curious


----------



## BigElectricKat (Apr 20, 2020)

I suppose I'm that different type of FA. In the past, some of my opinions were met with... Well, I was privately asked if I really belonged here. So, Since then I've just shut my trap about it.


----------



## landshark (Apr 20, 2020)

BigElectricKat said:


> I suppose I'm that different type of FA. In the past, some of my opinions were met with... Well, I was privately asked if I really belonged here. So, Since then I've just shut my trap about it.



Privately asked by who? Nobody of importance, I’d guess. I say share away!


----------



## Shotha (Apr 21, 2020)

I like big, fat men with big, round bellies. I like strong looking men. And I like some fur, especially face fur. Polar Bear that used to be on Ice Road Truckers is the sort of man that I like. I like big, bulgy bears. I tell people that I'm a 3 F's man. When people ask what that is, I explain that it means, "No fat, no fur; no f**k." For me the most important thing is fat. And did I mention that there are even LGBTI+ F/FA's.

I think that our tastes can be influenced by what is available. If I lived somewhere, where there were no big, fat, bearish men, then I might try dating a guy, who is just plain fat.

I think that this is a very useful question. There is no accounting for taste. This is just another instance of the old adage ,"Some gentlemen prefer blondes and others prefer brunettes." People have all manner of features which another person may or may not find attractive. I don't believe that size and body type preferences are fetishes. It's just a matter of what each individual looks good. It is important to know the range of people and their preferences that we are dealing with, when we are organizing events and groups. It is useful to have an idea of the sort of size range we are dealing with so that we can provide comfortable seating for everyone.

This is also an interesting and useful question, because it is relevant to our importance in human evolution. Mammals have developed a number of mechanisms, which account for their success in the world today. These include fur, feeding their young on milk, and fat. Without fat, survival would be impossible for most mammals. It is less important for humans than for many other mammals, since we do not hibernate. Fat still helps humans to survive under harsh conditions. It is part of the biological diversity, which has helped humans to survive and proliferate. If that diversity did not exist, we would be less able to survive in changing conditions. That diversity would not continue to exist, if there were not individuals who found all of those features to be attractive in a mate. And so, I believe that it is in the interests of our survival as a species that there are fat people and F/FA's.

Asking such a question enable us to highlight if there are any places, where we are discriminating directly or indirectly against F/FA's and fat people. If we can identify instances of this, then we have a chance of rectifying it.


----------



## landshark (Apr 21, 2020)

Shh! Don’t tell! said:


> I’m actually a-okay with chicken legs and weak arms and pancake butt. Sometimes I feel like the only person in the world who likes that. Muscle just isn’t very appealing to me, not sure why.



I’ve always sort of pictured some of our lovely resident FFAs such as @Corey @Shh! Don’t tell! and @Jaycee to be strutting around with a big guy built almost like an offensive lineman, if not quite as large (that general body type does come in smaller packages). Soft, but ridiculously strong.

But the quoted post suggests otherwise. I think it underscores the whole point of her starting this thread too. Just because we all like fat girls or guys doesn’t mean we all have similar tastes. There is so much variety in body type even between to 5’2/300 pound women.

That sort of brings me to my next point. I’ve mentioned this here before, I believe in the FA frustrations thread.

Has anyone, guy or girl, ever encountered the hyperbolic response to their preference? For example, I’ve shared on other forums that I like big girls and the response I often get is “oh so you’d tag Honey Boo-Boo’s mom?” Or some other extreme. But just because I like fat women doesn’t mean I find all of them attractive and doesn’t mean I automatically want to “tag” every fat woman I see.

I do have a wide range of what I consider attractive, with some strong preferences for certain features over others. But, assuming I was looking for a partner, that doesn’t mean I’d pursue something with a person just because she is fat.


----------



## adam (Apr 21, 2020)

Shh! Don’t tell! said:


> I was just thinking that when people say fat on here, they’re often thinking of very different body shapes and sizes. Like, I just like all sizes of paunch, even a very small, slight one and don’t like the all over “soft fat” look at all, but some people seem to be the exact opposite. What’s the deal with that? Is it even the same preference/fetish?


I like the word "fat" used in place of "beautiful" & I like different shapes & weight ranges of fat women. I like hourglass, super hourglass, pear, super pear shapes as primary shapes. I like cellulite on those shapes & I like whatever the belly is that comes with them; small, medium, large, extra large. "Small" is a belly that doesn't cover the fupa at all when standing. "Medium" covers the fupa partially. "Large" covers the fupa & is touching the top of the thighs if not partially covering them. "Extra Large" is fully covering the tops of the thighs but could hang even lower down. I see many ssbbw models that weigh at least 400lbs or way more, that all technically have a "Medium" belly. You wouldn't think that could be but it is. Lastly I don't like hard pot bellies.


----------



## Jaycee (Apr 21, 2020)

happily_married said:


> I’ve always sort of pictured some of our lovely resident FFAs such as @Corey @Shh! Don’t tell! and @Jaycee to be strutting around with a big guy built almost like an offensive lineman, if not quite as large (that general body type does come in smaller packages). Soft, but ridiculously strong.
> 
> But the quoted post suggests otherwise. I think it underscores the whole point of her starting this thread too. Just because we all like fat girls or guys doesn’t mean we all have similar tastes. There is so much variety in body type even between to 5’2/300 pound women.
> 
> ...




YES!! I too have gotten that! From the 2 men I have told that I'm attracted to fat guys. Apparently to them being I like fat men, means I find every fat man attractive. Which definitely is NOT the case! I absolutely hate having someone who knows I have a fat preference, point out a random fat man that's not my type and ask if I think they're hot, then when I say no (because they are not what I find attractive) it is taken as I don't actually find fat men attractive being I don't find every fat man hot. Which that thought process really doesn't make any sense to me.

I personally found a range of fat bodies attractive (from a decently chubby all over to SSBHM) being size fat distributes on everyone differently which is a beautiful thing, but that being said I have never once in my (young) life found a thin or fit man attractive so I might be a little bit on the picky side as to what I find attractive.


----------



## Shotha (Apr 21, 2020)

I also notice that on some of the gay FA and gainer sites that I frequent, people can be critical of guys that they don't think are fat enough and of their admirers. Some people get turned on by just a little fat and others want a lot of it. There needs to be more acceptance of the range of body types that can be included under the word "fat". Just because a fat person is not the sort of fat person that we find attractive is no reason to pick on them.


----------



## Shotha (Apr 21, 2020)

adam said:


> I like the word "fat" used in place of "beautiful"



This raises a point, which is a big issue for me. Because we all too often find the word "fat" used alongside negative words, I like to give the word a nudge in the opposite direction by using it alongside positive words. I'll say things such as, "I've started dating this really handsome, fat guy." It stops the negative comments, before they even start.


----------



## Tad (May 4, 2020)

Shh! Don’t tell! said:


> I was just thinking that when people say fat on here, they’re often thinking of very different body shapes and sizes. Like, I just like all sizes of paunch, even a very small, slight one and don’t like the all over “soft fat” look at all, but some people seem to be the exact opposite. What’s the deal with that? Is it even the same preference/fetish?



I don't think it is the same preference ... but I also don't think most interests/preferences are. I think our attractions are usually quite complex, and we mostly label them with one particular point of attraction or a catch-all phrase, that conceals at least as much as it reveals. It is a bit like saying that you like dogs, there are so many types of dogs, so many ways you can interact with dogs, so many emotions and activities that being with dogs can enable. Any two dog lovers can probably find points in common, but also others on which they'll differ. Or to put it another way, being an FA is a bit liking saying everyone who has ever lived in Pittsburgh for any length of time. They all have one point in common, but that doesn't make them all that much more similar than any other set drawn from the American population.

If our society was not so generally anti-fat, I don't think the label fat-admirer would exist. Because liking fat is considered unusual (if not outright deviant), it kind of makes sense to lump all of those with that same unusual preference under a term because we are a small enough part of the population and we are 'similar enough' that having a term is handy. But I don't think being an FA has really been one thing.


----------



## Shotha (May 5, 2020)

Tad said:


> I don't think it is the same preference ... but I also don't think most interests/preferences are. I think our attractions are usually quite complex, and we mostly label them with one particular point of attraction or a catch-all phrase, that conceals at least as much as it reveals. It is a bit like saying that you like dogs, there are so many types of dogs, so many ways you can interact with dogs, so many emotions and activities that being with dogs can enable. Any two dog lovers can probably find points in common, but also others on which they'll differ. Or to put it another way, being an FA is a bit liking saying everyone who has ever lived in Pittsburgh for any length of time. They all have one point in common, but that doesn't make them all that much more similar than any other set drawn from the American population.
> 
> If our society was not so generally anti-fat, I don't think the label fat-admirer would exist. Because liking fat is considered unusual (if not outright deviant), it kind of makes sense to lump all of those with that same unusual preference under a term because we are a small enough part of the population and we are 'similar enough' that having a term is handy. But I don't think being an FA has really been one thing.



I'd go along with that. We're similar enough and have to deal with the same kinds of societal disapproval. These are good reason to band together in groups for support and social activities but within those groups there is a huge amount of diversity.


----------



## Jon Blaze (May 21, 2020)

FA preferences are definitely nuanced. Size and what I perceive as curviness are the biggest factors outside of things like a nice smile etc... I think I'm different than many because while I do find thin women attractive at times it's completely different from my FA side. Stuffing and the idea of them becoming larger doesn't appeal to me unless they cross over into the sort of thicker territory. It's one reason why I generally say I prefer fat women instead of fat.


----------



## Tad (May 21, 2020)

On the general topic (but not so much to the original post), I've long felt that there are three broad categories of fat-admiration:
1- on others of the group who you are sexually attracted to
2- on others NOT of the group you are sexually attracted to
3- on yourself

1 is the one most often meant by the term FA, but the other two exist too. From talking with various people around here and similar places over the years, I'm pretty sure that all of these can occur on their own, or in combination with one or both of the others. By way of examples:
- the guy who is attracted to fat women in his age range, but wants to be thin, expects other guys to be thin, and has slightly negative views of fat women outside his age range (1 only)
- the woman who doesn't appreciate her own fat, but who thinks other fat women look great, but is only sexually attracted to thin men (2 only)
- The woman who does appreciate her own fat and who thinks other fat women look great, but is only sexually attracted to thin men (1 and 2)
- the person who very much feels sexier as they are fatter, but has no interest in anyone else's fatness (3 only)
- The guy who likes being fat and feels happiest around other fat guys, but is attracted to thin women (2 and 3)
- The guy who loves being fat and who is sexually attracted to other fat guys, but also thinks women look great fat even if he's not sexually attracted to them (1, 2, and 3)
- The woman who loves being fat and is attracted to fat people of whatever gender (1, 2, and 3)

I tried coining terms for these in the past, but they never caught on, so I gave up on that. But I still think there is value in recognizing these different categories.


----------



## JackCivelli (May 21, 2020)

Jaycee said:


> YES!! I too have gotten that! From the 2 men I have told that I'm attracted to fat guys. Apparently to them being I like fat men, means I find every fat man attractive. Which definitely is NOT the case! I absolutely hate having someone who knows I have a fat preference, point out a random fat man that's not my type and ask if I think they're hot, then when I say no (because they are not what I find attractive) it is taken as I don't actually find fat men attractive being I don't find every fat man hot. Which that thought process really doesn't make any sense to me.
> 
> I personally found a range of fat bodies attractive (from a decently chubby all over to SSBHM) being size fat distributes on everyone differently which is a beautiful thing, but that being said I have never once in my (young) life found a thin or fit man attractive so I might be a little bit on the picky side as to what I find attractive.


Honestly, that doesn’t make you any pickier than people who only find skinny people attractive


----------



## Jaycee (May 21, 2020)

JackCivelli said:


> Honestly, that doesn’t make you any pickier than people who only find skinny people attractive




Right! I think people have harder time realizing that for people with a fat preference, some people just because you don't find what society says we should be attracted to.


----------



## Shotha (May 21, 2020)

Tad said:


> On the general topic (but not so much to the original post), I've long felt that there are three broad categories of fat-admiration:
> 1- on others of the group who you are sexually attracted to
> 2- on others NOT of the group you are sexually attracted to
> 3- on yourself
> ...



Wow! I score 1, 2 and 3.


----------



## Tad (May 22, 2020)

Shotha said:


> Wow! I score 1, 2 and 3.


I'm ... not shocked lol (we do get a mix of types around Dimensions, but it doesn't usually take too many posts before you know, and anyone who has been here for long picks up that there are other mixes than whatever they experience. It is more in the wider world/web that I find FA is often used to just mean the first type.)


----------



## Shh! Don’t tell! (May 22, 2020)

@Tad i think that’s a really accurate break down.


----------



## Barrett (May 22, 2020)

Shh! Don’t tell! said:


> @Tad i think that’s a really accurate break down.



You're back!


----------



## loopytheone (May 22, 2020)

For me, I'm all about the softness when it comes to guys. I wanna be able to jiggle and squeeze and squish. I love bellies but I love body types that are in proportion more than anything, I guess. Guys with big thighs, big butts, big arms etc etc. I prefer pear shaped to top heavy. But I love squeezing fat guy's boobs too so, uh, I dunno. I also prefer shorter guys. I'm not into guys that are all belly, they have to have chub everywhere, but being apple shaped/belly heavy is absolutely fine, if that makes sense. 

When it comes to girls, again, I like soft. But also I like the round, full body type. I like pear shaped girls with small boobs a lot, but then, I also love girls with big boobs. I like big bellies but again, like with guys, I like it to be with a thick, fat body too. 

Think I'm coming to the conclusion that I just like what I like, hah.


----------



## Shotha (May 22, 2020)

Shh! Don’t tell! said:


> @Tad i think that’s a really accurate break down.


@Tad

It's also a comprehensive classification, because every F/FA fits somewhere in it.

But what about "cryptopachyphilia" (I just neologized that word.) or closeted fat admiration? It plays a big part in my world. I meet so many gay men, who describe themselves as chasers but not as gainers. I talk with them about whether they have a deep down wish to be fat themselves. They vehemently deny it but when I work on them many finally admit that they want to gain. Some are afraid of doing it but many admit to it and give it a try. There are, of course, those who don't do it. They've always puzzled me. That's something that my mind finds hard to understand. After all, I found fat men to be so beautiful that I just had to be one of them. I suppose that liking fat guys but not wanting to be one is like being heterosexual, i.e. finding the opposite sex attractive without wanting to be one of them.

There must, of course, be "cryptopachyphilia" among heterosexuals, too, because anyone who has not yet plucked up the courage to be open about their fat admiration is engaging in it. I'm fascinated by the secret ones.

I'll have to start keeping some stats on "cryptopachyphilia".


----------



## Tad (May 23, 2020)

Shotha said:


> @Tad
> 
> It's also a comprehensive classification, because every F/FA fits somewhere in it.
> 
> ...



I think there is a second (third?) dimension, where that sort of thing falls in. There are people who flat out deny it, those who mostly deny it but enjoy a little thrill at the forbidden thought occassionally, those who like being sneaky about it and denying it, those who want to do it without wanting attention, those who want attention for it .... I would imagine that the same would be true for many kinks (and possibly for sexual orientation?) but I've not spent any real amount of time in other kink spaces so I don't know.


----------



## Shotha (May 23, 2020)

Tad said:


> I think there is a second (third?) dimension, where that sort of thing falls in. There are people who flat out deny it, those who mostly deny it but enjoy a little thrill at the forbidden thought occassionally, those who like being sneaky about it and denying it, those who want to do it without wanting attention, those who want attention for it .... I would imagine that the same would be true for many kinks (and possibly for sexual orientation?) but I've not spent any real amount of time in other kink spaces so I don't know.



Yes, that would make sense for both fat admiration and for sexual orientation, as with both of these people are aware of their inclinations without acting on them and then go into practice in secret. I have, however, noticed some differences between the two.

With sexual orientation, many people go on to being open about it. However, in my experience few seek attention for it. Most of us seek the company of other gay, lesbian, or bi people, because it's nice to have the support and to be able to socialize with people, who will identify with the things that you want to talk about, although this tends not to work out well for those of us, who are also F/FA's.

LGB F/FA's generally socialize among themselves in the same way that LGB people do.

Your 3rd category of F/FA's are mainly gainers and they get together in groups and clubs online. We share our weight gaining with each other just like bodybuilders. We compete with each other and brag about how fat we are. We watch each other strive for and achieve our weight gain targets. "I'm fatter than you are." "My belly's bigger than yours."


----------



## Blockierer (May 24, 2020)

Tad said:


> I think there is a second (third?) dimension, where that sort of thing falls in. There are people who flat out deny it, those who mostly deny it but enjoy a little thrill at the forbidden thought occassionally, those who like being sneaky about it and denying it, those who want to do it without wanting attention, *those who want attention for it .... * I would imagine that the same would be true for many kinks (and possibly for sexual orientation?) but I've not spent any real amount of time in other kink spaces so I don't know.


I'm one of them *who want attention for it ....*
I love it when people know that I really like fat women.


----------



## Ffancy (May 24, 2020)

The very real social and possible physical consequences of being fat certainly play into people’s denial of their desires. I’m a 1, 2 and 3 on Tad’s scale there. A few years ago I lived my desire to deliberately gain some weight and it was hot! But I reached the limit of where I’m personally comfortable and I have no desire to gain further. I definitely have times when I wish I could go back to where I was before, because I was fat enough to feel sexy then, but exercising was easier and I was still sort of on the cusp of being mainstream attractive and now I’m not - but I don’t wish it hard enough to diet haha.


----------



## luckyfa (Feb 6, 2022)

This is an interesting question, how do specific preferences of fat admiring evolve? When my wife and I got together, she was just a bit chubby and I almost wouldn‘t have dated her because I deemed her „too fat“ for me. I enjoyed her chubbiness and loved her appetite but I didn‘t know I was a fat admirer.

She began to gain weight rapidly and it was after five months into our relationship, when she had a double belly, that I knew that I am into big girls. But I was specifically into big girls with double bellies, big girls whose bellies are their fattest body part, provided that the butt and thighs are still fat enough to be somewhat proportional. I wasn‘t very fond of very fat thighs or huge butts at the expense of the belly. But of course, I love fat thighs and butts if and when the double belly is bigger and dominant.

Now the question is: Is this specific preference innate or did I learn this preference because my wife got fat the way she did and I love(d) her? Would I have acquired a different taste if my wife had gotten fat differently?

My preference is even more specific: My wife‘s boobs didn‘t grow at all (she had small boobs to begin with) and that‘s an absolute dream: A very fat woman with small boobs yet lots of side fat, fat arms, back fat and a fat face including a double chin.

Again: Innate preference or learned?

After her initial gains, her proportions and shape remained roughly the same while she gained 130 lbs in the first ten years of our relationship. They remained the same while she was losing half of it (65 lbs) again in almost 20 years.

In the meantime, within three years, she has gained 45 lbs back and while I was thrilled about those regains, I was a bit worried at first that the weight gain might go to the wrong places. Her thighs got disportionally fat and it took about 6 months until her belly got the upper hand again. After her belly had caught up, she got a butt shelf and very fat hips. The interesting thing is that she‘s now almost as fat as more than 20 years ago although still 20 lbs lighter.


----------



## TheShannan (Feb 6, 2022)

It's crazy how so many people say they want a BBW or plus size but want the pear body, pear shape, etc.


----------

