# Society's standard of acceptable plus size



## ThatNoraChick (Feb 10, 2019)

I just want to say I have noticed a trend on instagram and social media where people are only acceptable of Plus size women with no bellies. Just want to say that we are out there and we exist and I know I am not the only plus size woman who feels like society tries to censor us because we don't fit their standard of thick or big butt no stomach bullshit. We are valuable and we are not going anywhere. Just saying.


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## Jay78 (Feb 10, 2019)

Bellies are the best!!!


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## bigisland (Feb 10, 2019)

ThatNoraChick said:


> I just want to say I have noticed a trend on instagram and social media where people are only acceptable of Plus size women with no bellies. Just want to say that we are out there and we exist and I know I am not the only plus size woman who feels like society tries to censor us because we don't fit their standard of thick or big butt no stomach bullshit. We are valuable and we are not going anywhere. Just saying.


TNC from your photos you will be very attractive no matter what your number says


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## ThatNoraChick (Feb 10, 2019)

thank you guys


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## Happy fat lover (Feb 17, 2019)

Jay78 said:


> Bellies are the best!!!


Most definitely, bellies are the best curve


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## Saxphon (Feb 17, 2019)

ThatNoraChick said:


> I just want to say I have noticed a trend on instagram and social media where people are only acceptable of Plus size women with no bellies. Just want to say that we are out there and we exist and I know I am not the only plus size woman who feels like society tries to censor us because we don't fit their standard of thick or big butt no stomach bullshit. We are valuable and we are not going anywhere. Just saying.


Regarding the pics you posted - You look beautiful in both. However, I'm a little more partial to the one in red and how it relates to your post. It shows off more of those beautiful curves of your belly. Very lovely.


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## LarryTheNoodleGuy (Feb 17, 2019)

Bellies more than welcome, as is a nice chubby face.


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## JDavis (Feb 18, 2019)

As Annie Lenox said "Keep young and beautiful if you want to be loved" . My belly gets bigger as I age.


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## Jay78 (Feb 18, 2019)

JDavis said:


> As Annie Lenox said "Keep young and beautiful if you want to be loved" . My belly gets bigger as I age.


I’d be disappointed if mine wasn’t getting bigger as I aged!!


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## goodman4ssbbw (Feb 18, 2019)

The bottom - buttocks, thighs, and apron belly.


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## extra_m13 (Mar 3, 2019)

you know what... you may be right about the trend that you have noticed. the reason could possible be that this hourglass shapes with big hips and no bellies are just easier to expose in some poses or in underwear but yes for sure, they do not reflect but only a small fraction of woman figures. but... nevertheless, it is a positive step towards a more comprehensible beauty definition i mean, years ago no hips were acceptable no cellulite no legs no rolls no nothing, now, well, things are a bit better and in the right direction


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## DragonFly (Mar 12, 2019)

I love social media and at the same time hate it. It is so true that it is okay for a female cis or other to be only so big and be big in a certain shape. As said above yes it is easier to get good photos of that hourglass shape. The evil underlying that is there are not enough clothes made for the larger women. If you are large and not hourglass shaped it gets even harder. I will be honest, I have 80% of my tops custom made. I specify lengths, for sleeves and overall, and at first gave all of my measurement. On Instagram I participated in #infinifatshionfebruary. That is where us infinifat ( those that no longer fit within the clothing industries standardized sizes. ) post outfits of the day. We are doing this to get the word out that companies do not meet our needs. Really after a size 32 each company if they vary bigger makes up their own scale. If you take a good look at those bloggers and influencers that claim to be fat focused, many are supported by companies that have limited size ranges.


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## Shotha (Mar 12, 2019)

I heard of a campaign called Clothes Calling Card. They send you some cards to carry with you. When you go into a clothing store and find items that you would buy, if only them had them in your size, you fill in a card. You fill in each item with the price. I think that you can specify your size. You put the total that you would have sent at the bottom of the card, which reads, "If you had the above items in my size, I would have spent $xx.xx in your store today." You hand it to the manager. It politely exerts pressure on the store to stock larger sizes.

I made my own cards and started handing them out to menswear stores and departments. I quickly found out that they were always happy to listen to what I had to say about my wants and needs. I found I could just talk with them and they would listen. So, I didn't need the cards. The only thing that I had difficulty with was getting them to understand that I didn't want clothes that hide how fat I am. I like my shape and so I like to show it off. We're working on it.


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## DragonFly (Mar 13, 2019)

Shotha said:


> I heard of a campaign called Clothes Calling Card. They send you some cards to carry with you. When you go into a clothing store and find items that you would buy, if only them had them in your size, you fill in a card. You fill in each item with the price. I think that you can specify your size. You put the total that you would have sent at the bottom of the card, which reads, "If you had the above items in my size, I would have spent $xx.xx in your store today." You hand it to the manager. It politely exerts pressure on the store to stock larger sizes.
> 
> I made my own cards and started handing them out to menswear stores and departments. I quickly found out that they were always happy to listen to what I had to say about my wants and needs. I found I could just talk with them and they would listen. So, I didn't need the cards. The only thing that I had difficulty with was getting them to understand that I didn't want clothes that hide how fat I am. I like my shape and so I like to show it off. We're working on it.


That really is a great idea! If there were defined sizes for my size I could do that! The clothing industry just doesn’t get it


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## loopytheone (Mar 13, 2019)

You know, I'm curious, what sort of weight/size do you start having problems finding clothes than can fit even at plus sized shops? Men's clothes seem to be much more forgiving, my ex was short and 450 lbs and had no real problems finding clothes in plus sized (and sometimes regular sized!) shops. The fashion industry seems to be much harsher on women and you start being unable to find clothes at a much smaller size.

I know I'm 5'2 and 210 lbs, and I have trouble finding clothes in anything other than plus sized stores, yet my 5'7, 300 lb boyfriend can easily find his size and bigger in standard men's shops. It seems really strange to me. I'm often, like, a 3-4 xL in some women's sizes (and just an XL in others!) yet he is pretty consistently a 2XL, despite being a fair bit bigger than me. It seems strange that clothing manufacturers can be accommodating to small-fat men and small-fat women, and it seems to show the same pattern with larger sizes too.


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## DragonFly (Mar 13, 2019)

loopytheone said:


> You know, I'm curious, what sort of weight/size do you start having problems finding clothes than can fit even at plus sized shops? Men's clothes seem to be much more forgiving, my ex was short and 450 lbs and had no real problems finding clothes in plus sized (and sometimes regular sized!) shops. The fashion industry seems to be much harsher on women and you start being unable to find clothes at a much smaller size.
> 
> I know I'm 5'2 and 210 lbs, and I have trouble finding clothes in anything other than plus sized stores, yet my 5'7, 300 lb boyfriend can easily find his size and bigger in standard men's shops. It seems really strange to me. I'm often, like, a 3-4 xL in some women's sizes (and just an XL in others!) yet he is pretty consistently a 2XL, despite being a fair bit bigger than me. It seems strange that clothing manufacturers can be accommodating to small-fat men and small-fat women, and it seems to show the same pattern with larger sizes too.


Men’s clothing has always been that way. Often time the only way I can find outerwear is in the big men’s sizes


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## Shotha (Mar 13, 2019)

DragonFly said:


> The clothing industry just doesn’t get it



I know that they don't get it but I'm sure that the one way that's more likely to make them get it than anything else is, is to wave our dollar bills in their faces. If money doesn't persuade them to cater for us, nothing will.


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## Shotha (Mar 13, 2019)

loopytheone said:


> Men's clothes seem to be much more forgiving




This is sexism at work. Society is harsh on fat men but it's much harder on fat women. Various political groups have been trying to fix this inequality for decades.


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## Shotha (Mar 13, 2019)

loopytheone said:


> It seems really strange to me. I'm often, like, a 3-4 xL in some women's sizes (and just an XL in others!)



Because of this variation in size standards among various manufacturers, I always take a tape measure with me, when I go shopping for clothes. It's much quicker and easier to run the tape measure across the sizes that you think might fit than it is to try them all on in the fitting room.


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## BigElectricKat (Mar 25, 2019)

loopytheone said:


> You know, I'm curious, what sort of weight/size do you start having problems finding clothes than can fit even at plus sized shops? Men's clothes seem to be much more forgiving, my ex was short and 450 lbs and had no real problems finding clothes in plus sized (and sometimes regular sized!) shops. The fashion industry seems to be much harsher on women and you start being unable to find clothes at a much smaller size.
> 
> I know I'm 5'2 and 210 lbs, and I have trouble finding clothes in anything other than plus sized stores, yet my 5'7, 300 lb boyfriend can easily find his size and bigger in standard men's shops. It seems really strange to me. I'm often, like, a 3-4 xL in some women's sizes (and just an XL in others!) yet he is pretty consistently a 2XL, despite being a fair bit bigger than me. It seems strange that clothing manufacturers can be accommodating to small-fat men and small-fat women, and it seems to show the same pattern with larger sizes too.


I think the situation between men's and women's clothing is different for one very basic reason: For the most part, men carry at great deal of their extra weight the same way (usually in their belly area). Yes, or legs and such get bigger the more weight we put on, but the gut is where it usually it begins to manifest first. Subsequently, clothing manufacturers craft clothing to accommodate those changes accordingly. This is a genetic thing for us.
Women on the other hand can see their extra weight deposited in several areas of the body. Not only the belly but waist, hips, chest and/or thighs. Again, this is genetics. But clothing manufacturers have a hard time settling on how they'll craft their clothing. What area(s) do they target when making the bigger items? At a size 2 or a size 20, how do you want it to fit? Tighter and curve hugging (if you have any) or looser and more comfortable? It's usually a trade off.


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## agouderia (Mar 25, 2019)

BEK - I second what you said. The wider range of fat female shapes definitely makes producing fitting clothing an issue as sizes grow larger.

There are 2 more aspects though, which haven't been addressed so far.

Men's clothing to a much larger extent comes in various sizes that account not only for width - but also for height.
For men's shorts sizes come according to neck size, length, and tailoring.
With women's blouses it's just a given size which mainly tries to size up width as you go.

On the other hand, the range of what is offered as men's clothing is more limited - with regards to colors, items (think alone the minimum addition of dresses and skirts) and styles offered.
So the simple economic risk of getting your market totally wrong is much higher with women's clothing - see the many brands that are regularly failing.


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## Shotha (Mar 25, 2019)

BigElectricKat said:


> I think the situation between men's and women's clothing is different for one very basic reason: For the most part, men carry at great deal of their extra weight the same way (usually in their belly area). Yes, or legs and such get bigger the more weight we put on, but the gut is where it usually it begins to manifest first. Subsequently, clothing manufacturers craft clothing to accommodate those changes accordingly. This is a genetic thing for us.



For fat guys, there are two frequent body type. Some of us have the weight distributed more or less evenly all over the body and are often referred to as "corpulent". Others have the weight mainly around the belly. We can call them "paunchy". To cater for these differences, you need to have clothes made to measure. Most stores however have shirts and pants that are slim-fit. (It amuses me that they make slim-fit clothes for fat guys.) Most big-and-tall shops stock clothes for fat men, tall men and men who are tall and fat. If, like me, you have a big bulgy belly, it may be appropriate to buy clothes for a taller man, so that you have enough fabric to go round the curvature of the belly and tuck into your pants. This all sounds fairly simple to me.

I have to agree with agouderia on the greater range of clothes needed by women. I think that women have a much greater range of body shapes. More colours, styles, fabrics and cuts are need to cater for the market.

What irritates me about shopping for clothes is that even in big-and-tall stores, they try to sell me clothes, which, they assure me, will make me look slimmer. "Yes, sir, we have that in your size and in three nice slimming colours." They just don't understand that I don't want to look slim. The slimming colours are often the only option in larger sizes.


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