# Ruined...in a good way.



## ecogeek (Feb 28, 2013)

At 29, I've only ever been with non-FAs. Most of those very long term relationships. I've had the question come up of...well certainly they must have been at least partial FA to have been with you...but I really don't think this is the case. 

The other day I spent time with my first actual FA ever. I really wish I would have known about this years ago. Really. I cannot imagine what it would have been like to be with my husband if he had ever ONCE looked at me the way this guy did. 

Certainly, I cannot be the only chick to only just be discovering this. Most of the girls here talk about how it is hard to be with a non-FA, I can say certain aspects can be just as scary when all you know is a non-FA. To have been filled with years of doubts and hiding in the dark. Then to have one person who wants the opposite and looks at you and treats you like you are beautiful. 

Quite an eye opener for me. I hope these guys realise that this is all very new and somewhat frightening for some of us. I'm all about facing my demons though.


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## CaAggieGirl (Feb 28, 2013)

Yes. I met my first FA, that I know of, last year. He had to go slow with the fat love since it was so strange for me. As I became more comfortable with it, I began to enjoy it. It was hard for me to let go of all of the past and what I have been told about my body, but when I did, I noticed the look of sheer pleasure/happiness on his face as he would rub my belly and other fat parts. It was amazing.

Congratulations on your first FA, they are great and I will definitely not forget get mine.


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## ecogeek (Feb 28, 2013)

I completely get that. Part of me was mad at myself for not just letting go but the other part of me knows that I will in time. I think I just need to shove myself into the deep end so to speak and get over it.


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## CaAggieGirl (Feb 28, 2013)

Just let him know how you feel. Start with parts that you are not as self conscious about and work your way up. Maybe have him say what he admires about that part, so you can understand his thinking and you can see the beauty in the fat.


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## gogogal (Feb 28, 2013)

Ecogeek that is aweeesome! While I have never had the pleasure of being with am FA so I can't speak from experience, but I say just let go and throw yourself into it! Tell him to tell you over and over how hot and sexy and beautiful you are and give in to it, baby! If you've got a man you really like adoring you, well, i say bring it on! Life's too short... Xo.


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## gogogal (Feb 28, 2013)

Couple glasses of wine might help too


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## ecogeek (Feb 28, 2013)

There was wine involved.  I don't know that the verbal affirmation thing is good for me. Keeps me thinking more than I should. Either way, the whole experience was definitely a nice change. I like having the opportunity to look back and decide what I need to do differently.


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## gogogal (Feb 28, 2013)

Long as you enjoy it. It sounds wonderful and hopefully you'll be spending more time with said FA soon


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## ecogeek (Mar 2, 2013)

Yah I will be.  You are super gorgeous btw! Number one girl crush for sure! Haha


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## gogogal (Mar 3, 2013)

Ecogeek ha that's awesome and thaaaank you! Yay for being girl-crushed on. You just made my day !


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## BarterGal (Mar 4, 2013)

Just about a month ago, I met my current boy on a bbw dating site. We live in a small town and I never thought I would meet someone in this town. I did buy an account last summer and when he winked at me, I emailed him back even though he had 2 things on his profile that I wasn't into. 

Divored
Joint Custody

But I decided to go for it it anyway. Turns out he lives 4 blocks away. We emailed all day, phoned that night/texted moving forward and then met 2 days later and spent our first date just freaking out on each other. We had so much in common even though I am white collar/he's blue collar. I found myself falling for this cock rock guy that night (yeah, long hair rocker biker guy!). We ended up spending the night together and in the late morning, I had realized I just spent 18 hours with a guy that totally just likes me for me, he was so into everything about me, never once made me feel he was an FA and was a great lover, all across so many boards (mind, body, heart). 

Now this is all on me to deal with because like the OP, I too have had to realize I'm in a real relationship with real emotions and am not used to this. As for being with an FA, it's amazing how he makes me feel. I was completely naked and comfortable night one. I've never felt this comfortable ever, with any man. Even one guy I dated for 7 years. 

He touches me constantly and in public. I adore it. Taps my butt too and it cracks me up.


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## ecogeek (Mar 4, 2013)

That is an awesome story! Living so close by in a small town. Good job!


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## BigBrwnSugar1 (Mar 5, 2013)

BarterGal said:


> Just about a month ago, I met my current boy on a bbw dating site. We live in a small town and I never thought I would meet someone in this town. I did buy an account last summer and when he winked at me, I emailed him back even though he had 2 things on his profile that I wasn't into.
> 
> Divored
> Joint Custody
> ...



Reading this gives me hope - thanks for sharing and here's to continued success!


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## sophie lou (Mar 7, 2013)

I just love reading the experiences you have all had. I am meeting up with a friend this weekend. We have been online fetish friends for a few years now we both have a voyeurism thing. He loves to watch me just doing routine stuff and then getting all sexy after a while like I don't know he is watching. He does the same for me. I know he is a FA he tells me all the time how much he loves my body. I'm excited just thinking about what he might be like getting to touch the areas he has only ever seen on cam. I know I can't wait to get my hands on his big soft belly and maybe somewhere that's not as soft.


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## b0nnie (Mar 9, 2013)

I've only been with one man who I'd say is an FA, met him on a BBW social site. The one and only time we were intimate was ok and probably could be considered really good....if only I hadn't been expecting something different from being with a man who openly likes big women. I guess I had imagined being with an FA would mean I'd get my belly rubbed and my fatty bits caressed when in actuality being with him was just like being with any other guy who has liked me. He didn't look at me any different then any other guy I've been intimate with and I just honestly didn't feel anything out of the ordinary.

I so wanted my "FA experience" that I've heard so much about.


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## 1love_emily (Mar 17, 2013)

The longest relationship I've ever been in, the first man I ever loved, and the first guy who truly broke my heart was the only FA I've ever dated (granted, he was only my second boyfriend). 

He was great, but now that I don't have any other FA's in my life, I find myself fancying these non-FA's and I'm afraid of them! I'm afraid of confessing my feelings toward them because I know I'm not beautiful like they expect beauty to be. 

I think I'm beautiful. Yeah, I'm fat and I'm trying to lose weight so I can be more athletic in my sport, but I think I've got a nice face and pretty hair. But whatever. 

I'm accepting that I'll probably be that weird, single music teacher with an odd assortment of pets when I grow up.


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## BarterGal (Mar 31, 2013)

Update to my "ruined in a good way"....it's now official we are a couple on FB and are titled bf/gf. I was so freaking giddy, like a dang school girl lol!

Then the talk came up about me riding on the Harley with him and our plans started to grow from spring to summer and this and that. Now this past weekend we did our first "weekend getaway" and it was awesome.

2 weeks ago we said we loved each other. It was so wonderful. I'm having so much fun falling in love with him and getting to know him more and more. 

This weekend I meet his friends at a bday party


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