# Admirers



## phelan4022 (May 26, 2014)

After much deliberation and discourse on the subject, I would like to propose a new descriptor for those, male or female, that admire full figured bodies. I know that using Fat in Fat Admirer is a means of taking the word back but the stigma attached to fat is so virulent that I've had it be an object of intense debate with both significant others and friends. Simply for me, there is far more to a BBW that I admire than her fat. Yes, her body is glorious but there is an ineffable grace to BBWs that transcends mere physicality and, be it through the vagaries of nature or nurture, a caliber of spirit that is as much an attraction to me as simple curvaceousness.

So, I propose and have already put into affect personally, that we no longer differentiate between male or female "fat" admirers but specifically state what we are personally attracted to. I, for instance, am a BBWA, a Big, Beautiful Woman Admirer, or just Admirer for short. A FFA would be a BHMA, etc.

I understand the difficulty of changing an already established factor of the meme but I think doing so would be of great benefit to our cause on the whole, supporting not just the aspects of our attraction but the people that embody them. I would love further input, positive or negative.

Thank you.


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## Blackjack (May 26, 2014)

Words describe, they do not define. These labels are quick and easy and recognized. They're not totally accurate, but they function well enough as umbrella terms to help give an identity to members of the community.


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## phelan4022 (May 26, 2014)

Blackjack said:


> Words describe, they do not define. These labels are quick and easy and recognized. They're not totally accurate, but they function well enough as umbrella terms to help give an identity to members of the community.



Umbrella terms that only serve to damage the movement in the common view. The whole reason I set about trying to come up with something different was because I was encountering so many real women that didn't want to call themselves fat or have someone attracted to them for their fat. The use of one word is a legitimate inhibitor to many people. I know that this is semantic silliness but I think it is a legitimate issue for enough people that it should be address.

This is strictly my opinion and you are happily entitled to your own, however, I will admit that I am trying to sway you and others like you to at least considering my cause.


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## Jon Blaze (May 26, 2014)

Blackjack said:


> Words describe, they do not define. These labels are quick and easy and recognized. They're not totally accurate, but they function well enough as umbrella terms to help give an identity to members of the community.



Agreed. I'm pretty sure 98% of us don't use the term outside of the community anyway. At least not with people we know or believe aren't aware of the community. The way we carry ourselves, our awareness, and the way we treat others is much more important.


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## ThisIsBrian (May 26, 2014)

Though I've never really liked the term Fat Admirer (or BBW) I'm not convinced that using euphemisms for the word fat is going to change anyone's attitude about fat. Especially if the fat community itself is too ashamed to use the word.

I could be swayed to your cause if you came up with a superior alternative to Fat Admirer, for example something like: Amazing Badass Who Smells Fantastic, or ABWSF for short. Most people already call me an ABWSF so that would be an easy transition for me. But, you know, I'm open to other ideas.


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## phelan4022 (May 26, 2014)

ThisIsBrian said:


> I could be swayed to your cause if you came up with a superior alternative to Fat Admirer, for example something like: Amazing Badass Who Smells Fantastic, or ABWSF for short. Most people already call me an ABWSF so that would be an easy transition for me. But, you know, I'm open to other ideas.



I'm down. I'm now referring to myself as an ABWSF! I actually like that it requires a longer explanation, lol. And, I swear to all the deities that I am not being sarcastic of facetious.


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## phelan4022 (May 26, 2014)

Jon Blaze said:


> Agreed. I'm pretty sure 98% of us don't use the term outside of the community anyway. At least not with people we know or believe aren't aware of the community. The way we carry ourselves, our awareness, and the way we treat others is much more important.



You make a very convincing point. I have seen non-members of the community use it but I completely agree with your conclusion.


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## CurvaceousBBWLover (May 26, 2014)

ThisIsBrian said:


> Though I've never really liked the term Fat Admirer (or BBW) I'm not convinced that using euphemisms for the word fat is going to change anyone's attitude about fat. Especially if the fat community itself is too ashamed to use the word.
> 
> I could be swayed to your cause if you came up with a superior alternative to Fat Admirer, for example something like: Amazing Badass Who Smells Fantastic, or ABWSF for short. Most people already call me an ABWSF so that would be an easy transition for me. But, you know, I'm open to other ideas.




Given that a lot of fat women dread the word fat, I do not think that reclaiming the word will change people's attitudes. I do not like "fat admirer" or "chubby chaser" because both phrases sound fetishistic. What's interesting is that some women will often ask me in a suspicious way to justify why I like BBWs. Frankly, I am attracted to women. I like the word "man" just fine because it works best.


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## phelan4022 (May 27, 2014)

CurvaceousBBWLover said:


> Given that a lot of fat women dread the word fat, I do not think that reclaiming the word will change people's attitudes. I do not like "fat admirer" or "chubby chaser" because both phrases sound fetishistic. What's interesting is that some women will often ask me in a suspicious way to justify why I like BBWs. Frankly, I am attracted to women. I like the word "man" just fine because it works best.



Sir, I once debated the political viability of the Obama campaign alongside you in Hyde Park (the section on this website, not the actual location in Chicago). Then, as now, your words are both poignant and inspiring, as well as fundamentally true.


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## phelan4022 (May 27, 2014)

I think I just had an epiphany.

This morning before my significant other departed for work, we discussed the historical and anthropological validity of pantheism, it's relevancy to a rational, scientific as well as spiritual world view and debated its nature as a fundamental aspect of the pre-monotheistic faiths. She has been searching for a term that fits her beliefs for a long time. I told her, "when people ask me what I believe in, I tell them I believe in every faith and none of them at all." I encouraged her to keep seeking until she discovered that she needs no term to define her and to then continue seeking even after that point.

I realize that the joy of the mystery of seeking a true answer to a fundamental question of life is the deepest purpose of such seeking, not the small satisfaction of seemingly finding an answer to something that is properly ineffable. I have spent many years on the idea of a proper name to describe my attraction and I believe that I lost sight of the relevant fact that attraction to all shapes and sizes of people is a organic and beautiful event. In the Buddhist sense, I was grasping. No more, I will simply luxuriate in my attraction and appreciate the women that manifest its properties for the intricate and unfathomably precious beings that they are, as all people are inherently (circumstantial actions of ugliness regarded only in individual analysis).

Thank you, all.


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## Jah (May 27, 2014)

Well BBWA and BHMA certainly sounds a lot nicer but I'm used to using FA and FFA and it would be a difficult change.


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## Webmaster (May 27, 2014)

I don't think anyone ever liked the term FA. It's just that nothing better came a long. In addition, there should be no need to specifically broadcast a physical preference, no matter what preference that may be. In everyday life I've stopped using the term long ago. If someone asks my preference or if somehow the subject comes up, I simply state that I personally like large women.


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## phelan4022 (May 27, 2014)

Webmaster said:


> I don't think anyone ever liked the term FA. It's just that nothing better came a long. In addition, there should be no need to specifically broadcast a physical preference, no matter what preference that may be. In everyday life I've stopped using the term long ago. If someone asks my preference or if somehow the subject comes up, I simply state that I personally like large women.



Thank you for your input, sir. It is an honor to have your veritable two cents.


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## loopytheone (May 27, 2014)

I am glad you have understood and accepted that the need to find a 'perfect' defining word is far from important. 

In real life I have never called myself a FFA. I will say I like bigger guys and sometimes give examples of guys I find attractive, but only if someone asks. Online, however, I find that FFA is a pretty universally understood term that is quick to type and saves tedious repeated explanations. :happy:


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## Tad (May 27, 2014)

Webmaster said:


> I don't think anyone ever liked the term FA. It's just that nothing better came a long. In addition, there should be no need to specifically broadcast a physical preference, no matter what preference that may be. In everyday life I've stopped using the term long ago. If someone asks my preference or if somehow the subject comes up, I simply state that I personally like large women.



Pretty much this ^^^^^

Personal variations make clean categorization difficult, but some some roughly defined terms that are generally understood by a community do make communication easier--it is why every group develops its own jargon.

Now, having said that, one thing that the BBW/BHM labels on one side and FA labels on the other don't catch well is that one can be an admirer of:
- fat people of the group that you'd roughly consider as potential sexual partners (FA as a sexual thing)
- fat people that are not in the group you'd consider as sexual partners (FA as liking fat people in a non-sexual way)
- being fat yourself (FA as in thinking you yourself look better fat)

And we can be one, two, or all three of them. Although it is generally only the first two that would ever get classified as an FA usually, and only the first and third that would be apt to bring someone to a site like this, so combining those I suspect that most people who would ever think of themself as an FA would mean at least as a sexual thing.


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## bayone (May 27, 2014)

loopytheone said:


> Online, however, I find that FFA is a pretty universally understood term that is quick to type and saves tedious repeated explanations. :happy:




Wee...ell -- I have tried using it as a search tag on Tumblr only to find myself deluged with stuff about the Future Farmers of America.


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## James (May 28, 2014)

some alternatives... none serious... 

Fat Lady Enthusiast (FLE)
Weight Worshipper (WW)
Fatty Fanatic (FF)


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## ThisIsBrian (May 28, 2014)

James said:


> some alternatives... none serious...
> 
> Fat Lady Enthusiast (FLE)
> Weight Worshipper (WW)
> Fatty Fanatic (FF)



My vote goes with Fat Lady Enthusiast. It made me smile, it's to the point, and it's self-explanatory. I'd proudly wear the title Fat Lady Enthusiast... seriously.


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## Blackjack (May 28, 2014)

ThisIsBrian said:


> My vote goes with Fat Lady Enthusiast. It made me smile, it's to the point, and it's self-explanatory. I'd proudly wear the title Fat Lady Enthusiast... seriously.



I'm a Fat Lady Enthusiast in that I collect them. You know, like a trading card enthusiast?

You should really see all the ones I have.


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## lucca23v2 (May 29, 2014)

James said:


> some alternatives... none serious...
> 
> Fat Lady Enthusiast (FLE)
> Weight Worshipper (WW)
> Fatty Fanatic (FF)



*Fat Lady Enthusiast (FLE)* -- Eh.. and the acronym reminds me of flee... the insect

*Weight Worshipper (WW)* --I like this, but the WW acronym is already taken by weight watchers and it will confuse people.

*Fatty Fanatic (FF)* --I like this one too. But FF is taken by Fantasy Feeder....


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## petersmyth79 (May 29, 2014)

lucca23v2 said:


> *Fat Lady Enthusiast (FLE)* -- Eh.. and the acronym reminds me of flee... the insect
> 
> *Weight Worshipper (WW)* --I like this, but the WW acronym is already taken by weight watchers and it will confuse people.
> 
> *Fatty Fanatic (FF)* --I like this one too. But FF is taken by Fantasy Feeder....



Your 2nd point made me laugh greatly. Me and my fiance often joke that we are both a "member" of "weight watchers"; after all we are watching her weight, just not in the way that ppl mean when they normally say weight watchers


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## lucca23v2 (May 29, 2014)

petersmyth79 said:


> Your 2nd point made me laugh greatly. Me and my fiance often joke that we are both a "member" of "weight watchers"; after all we are watching her weight, just not in the way that ppl mean when they normally say weight watchers



LOL.... That is funny.


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## ThisIsBrian (May 29, 2014)

Blackjack said:


> I'm a Fat Lady Enthusiast in that I collect them. You know, like a trading card enthusiast?
> 
> You should really see all the ones I have.



No thanks. I'm not judging you but collecting fat ladies sounds kind of weird to me. I was referring more to my feelings of enthusiasm for big women. Sorry for the confusion.


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## lucca23v2 (May 29, 2014)

ThisIsBrian said:


> No thanks. I'm not judging you but collecting fat ladies sounds kind of weird to me. I was referring more to my feelings of enthusiasm for big women. Sorry for the confusion.



um... i think he was being facetious...lol

but thanks for the clarification. It can only help.


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## biglynch (May 29, 2014)

bayone said:


> Wee...ell -- I have tried using it as a search tag on Tumblr only to find myself deluged with stuff about the Future Farmers of America.



Yes! Agreed. I think those farmers are sick of my ass popping up so often. 

Female Fat admirer is fine by me, probably because there's no grey area. When I hear ladies say "I like chubby guys" I get disheartened as I don't feel I fit in the chubby bracket. 

Good topic OP


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## bayone (May 29, 2014)

biglynch said:


> Yes! Agreed. I think those farmers are sick of my ass popping up so often.




No, I believe it's the people looking up Black History Month who are wondering why they keep getting pictures of you.


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## J34 (May 29, 2014)

Webmaster said:


> I don't think anyone ever liked the term FA. It's just that nothing better came a long. In addition, there should be no need to specifically broadcast a physical preference, no matter what preference that may be. In everyday life I've stopped using the term long ago. If someone asks my preference or if somehow the subject comes up, I simply state that I personally like large women.



Very well said. I hate having to label or like you said broadcast a preference. I don't see guys calling themselves "Blonde or Brunette women admirers". Think terms are just a way for society to just pigeonhole people into a place. I like what I like, and no one needs an explanation for it why.


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## biglynch (May 29, 2014)

bayone said:


> No, I believe it's the people looking up Black History Month who are wondering why they keep getting pictures of you.



Actually that too is a very good point. Should I like apologise?


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## CurvaceousBBWLover (May 29, 2014)

phelan4022 said:


> Sir, I once debated the political viability of the Obama campaign alongside you in Hyde Park (the section on this website, not the actual location in Chicago). Then, as now, your words are both poignant and inspiring, as well as fundamentally true.



Why thanks!


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## bayone (May 30, 2014)

biglynch said:


> Actually that too is a very good point. Should I like apologise?



No, that way lies Tumbr fights. 

Maybe I ought to post some images of Ignatius Sancho, though -- he qualifies on both counts.

Anyway, I'll let everyone get back to the thread topic.


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