# Questions for fat girls who love heels



## Cors (Nov 5, 2008)

I was reading the shoe thread as usual, and got reminded of this incident. 

When I was with my BBW ex, I decided to buy her this pair of heels because she constantly talked about how cute they are and how she would love to wear them. I even measured her feet including the width to make sure that I get the right size.

Anyway, she was not happy at all with the gift and gave me a long lecture about how I do not understand her needs. To her, the heels were way too high (4 inches with a 1 1/4 inch platform, and they are somewhat chunky too), that it wasn't comfortable (even though the length and width are fine and I even offered to add Foot Petals to the insides for comfort) and she won't be able to walk in them (she has knee problems, but one shouldn't be walking great distances in heels anyway). 

I was taken aback by her response and asked her why she gushed about them so much. She got upset and told me how she yearns to fit into pretty dainty shoes like "normal" females do, but that it is just mere talk for her and she would rather stick to admiring them from afar even if the shoes actually fit. 

Okay, the questions. My ex does have self-esteem issues and is not comfortable with her size at all, so that could be why she reacted that way but I am curious about you guys think and I hope I don't offend anyone. 

Have you ever felt compelled to join in the girly talk about heels just because? Do you avoid high heels (or stick to certain styles) despite loving them because they cause great physical discomfort? Have you ever felt like you shouldn't be wearing them because of your size, assuming they fit perfectly and are relatively comfortable? For shoes that are clearly impractical, what do you think of confining them for use in the bedroom only? Will you be insulted if your partner buys you heels?


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## Suze (Nov 5, 2008)

*Have you ever felt compelled to join in the girly talk about heels just because?*
Not really.
*
Do you avoid high heels (or stick to certain styles) despite loving them because they cause great physical discomfort?*
They don't cause me any particular discomfort and I can walk pretty steady in them. I'm just terrified that I'm going to break the heel! ..that's the reason why I don't wear them too often. (Thank gawd for ballerinas and kitten heels)

*Have you ever felt like you shouldn't be wearing them because of your size, assuming they fit perfectly and are relatively comfortable? *
Not at all. I would love to wear heels more often, it's just this stupid fear of them breaking that I can't get rid off
*
For shoes that are clearly impractical, what do you think of confining them for use in the bedroom only? *
rawr! I prefer being totally undressed in bed, thanks. 

*Will you be insulted if your partner buys you heels?*
Not at all. The real question is; _would _I wear them? heh


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## Tooz (Nov 5, 2008)

Have you ever felt compelled to join in the girly talk about heels just because?

No.

Do you avoid high heels (or stick to certain styles) despite loving them because they cause great physical discomfort?

I love them but can't really wear them. My ankles roll easily.

Have you ever felt like you shouldn't be wearing them because of your size, assuming they fit perfectly and are relatively comfortable?

If I could be steady I'd wear them all the time.

For shoes that are clearly impractical, what do you think of confining them for use in the bedroom only?

Absolutely.

Will you be insulted if your partner buys you heels?


Nope.


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## phatfatgirl (Nov 5, 2008)

Have you ever felt compelled to join in the girly talk about heels just because?
No not really.. tho i do wish i could wear em comfortably.

Do you avoid high heels (or stick to certain styles) despite loving them because they cause great physical discomfort?
I love the look of em, but I also have a fear of breaking em, and of the discomfort, I've been places in shoes i shouldn't have been wearing and was extremely uncomfortable! Not a pleasant experience! 

Have you ever felt like you shouldn't be wearing them because of your size, assuming they fit perfectly and are relatively comfortable?
Ohhh no! Just my own phobia holding ME back! lol

For shoes that are clearly impractical, what do you think of confining them for use in the bedroom only?
Great fun! :wubu:

Will you be insulted if your partner buys you heels?
I'm sure we'd find SOME kind of use for em! :bow:


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## SamanthaNY (Nov 5, 2008)

I doubt it's anything to do with her size, though, I'm guessing there. 

4-inch heels generally don't work for any woman of significant size because as the heel is raised, all of the weight is transferred to the ball of the foot - and no amount of padding in the world is going to allow you to comfortably carry 300+ (*generally*, this is - some girls can do it, some can't) for any amount of distance - even if the fit is perfect and they're comfy. It's simply too much weight on a small joint. Add to that fact the tendency for increased size to mean increased need for stability and balance - both of which are challenged in heels, exponentially so with increased heights. Also - any compromise of other joints, knees, hips, ankles, back... will be further taxed by high heels. The spine in particular takes a beating because heels actually change the position and curvature of the spine by requiring different muscles for balance. This is exacerbated in large women, particularly those that have a big tummy - it pulls balance forward. 

I *adore* heels... but, I know my limitations, and I know that anything above 2.5" will not only cause me pain after a while, but also risks my safety. So it's a no-go. But, admire them I must - only from afar. Some gals have 'bedroom heels', and those are fine - I just prefer barefoot in those instances. Heh. 

I would probably consider a gift of heels to be a very romantic and sexy gift - but... my husband knows in advance that they are of ornamental value at best - and not to be used for walking, lest it risk my safety and health. It sounds as if that wasn't made clear to you before you so kindly gave your ex-girlfriend her shoes... some simple sharing of her concerns and limitations might have avoided that - but I can see where it would also be an uncomfortable discussion for her, particuarly if shoes are something she loves - but realizes she can't have.

My money, adoration and all earthly possessions will be gladly gifted to anyone who can make it possible for me to wear heels. Though I would be poor in pocketbook, I would be rich in happy, happy feet.


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## ashmamma84 (Nov 5, 2008)

Have you ever felt compelled to join in the girly talk about heels just because?

I love girly talk about anything...afterall, I am quite femme.

Do you avoid high heels (or stick to certain styles) despite loving them because they cause great physical discomfort?

Nope. I rock heels with the best of them. As long as I have a nice comfy pair like Cole Haan, then I'm good to go.

Have you ever felt like you shouldn't be wearing them because of your size, assuming they fit perfectly and are relatively comfortable? 

That thought has never crept into my head. I wear what I want, regardless.

For shoes that are clearly impractical, what do you think of confining them for use in the bedroom only? 

I do it. :wubu: I'm not hearing complaints either. 

Will you be insulted if your partner buys you heels?

No.


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## BeaBea (Nov 5, 2008)

I love heels, love how they look and love how women look wearing them but I cant wear them anywhere but in the bedroom. Personally I think thats actually a benefit because they are just for 'him and me' and not for public consumption - which makes a naughty looking shoe even more filthy 

Oh, and I'd NEVER join a conversation 'just because' lol 

Tracey xx


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## fiore (Nov 5, 2008)

I used to wear heels all the time when I was a bit thinner, but lately it's too much for me. I'll only wear them if it's the right occasion and I know I won't be on my feet much. I was very impressed with myself this past summer when I wore a pair of purple patent peep-toe pumps to a wedding for SEVEN HOURS! And they didn't hurt at all! I was pretty drunk though. that may have masked the pain. i miss wearing heels though, they made my legs look bangin


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## Cors (Nov 5, 2008)

Thank you all for sharing. 

From the responses, I guess it could just be her - at least, the parts about joining in a conversation just because, and feeling like one shouldn't be wearing heels because of size - or it could just be the women on Dims generally being more confident. 

I do understand how heels that are 4 inches and higher can be a significant strain on the body, especially for a bigger woman even if they fit well. I can't stand or walk around in some of them for long without significant discomfort that vanity cannot ease. The shoes I bought for her came with a high platform and a chunky heel so I imagined them to be more acceptable. I would have been happy if they stayed in the bedroom too. 

I guess I should have discussed it with her but I didn't because it was intended as a surprise. She was so enthusiastic and talked about walking in them so I assumed that she knows better. I also didn't want to dampen her mood by asking, because she was insecure about her size. 

As for the phobia of the heel breaking, I can see why weight adds to that fear but a lot of smaller women are scared too. It does get better with practice. ;D


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## elle camino (Nov 5, 2008)

4.5 inches is a _serious_ heel, for a person at pretty much any weight. like sam (right?) said, once you pass about the 3.5 heel height mark, it takes a LOT of deftness and practice to avoid just walking on the balls of your feet, which a casual (or seldom) heel-wearer is going to instinctively do, since that kind of height is so unfamiliar-feeling, and walking on our tippy toes is at least something we know we can do for a little while. 
and for a lot of women, it's unfortunately got a lot to do with how our self image fits into our world view. like maybe your girlfriend's only ever seen girls 120 pounds and under, carrie samantha charlotte and miranda or whatever, confidently wearing really high heels. it sounds like she really just assumes she can't wear them, because of her size. and maybe she's tried once or twice but it felt weird and didn't come naturally so she figured she'd faceplant the second she left the house in them, so she crossed anything but talking wistfully about them off her little list of sartorial possibilities. 

but really? consider this: _drag queens_.
even the frailest and most delicate queen is still a lot to put on a pair of 5 inch stilettos, and many (MANY) of them are upwards of 200, sometimes 300 pounds. and have you EVER seen a drag queen in flats?
the fact is they don't just stroll around in 4+ inch heels, they dance in them. they don't just dance in them, they do intricate dance _numbers_ in them, then spend the whole rest of the evening and into the wee hours mincing about, teetering on their giant queen heels.

so it IS possible for people all sizes to wear heels of all (somewhat reasonable) heights. across the board, it's just a skill you acquire from determination, practice, and not expecting supernatural things out of yourself (even teensy-tinesy girls have to take a break and get off their heels periodically through the night, and we ALL pay for it the next morning). i don't think that EVERY person could walk in a pair of 4 and a half inch heels if he or she wanted to (mobility issues, etc), but i don't think one's weight is really a factor in determining whether you can or can't, below a pretty dang lofty threshold .

as for the OP's specific situation with his ex-ladyfriend: dude, she just sounds like she had some pretty gnarly self esteem issues that haven't really got anything to do with shoes. i know personally (i think we all do) what it's like to have little esoteric triggers about larger issues which bother us, and for her the shoe thing might be one of those. but if she were in a right mind about that kind of thing, she would have seen that you were just giving her an incredibly thoughtful, generous gift which you had every reason to think that she'd be thrilled by. if you had really wanted to go all out, i guess you could have taken back the killer shoes and exchanged them for maybe a pair of kitten heels (2.5 inches and under), for her to get used to before she scales up into 3-5 inch territory, but if i were you i'd just have dropped it. kind of a no-win conversation.


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## SamanthaNY (Nov 5, 2008)

Have to disagree to the first part. Drag queens, being men, have inherently bigger bones and thus stronger joints. Those that are 200 and 300 pounds are aslo usually 6 feet tall and upwards - not only are their bodies stronger just as men, their skeletal structure is geared to carry more weight. Their bodies are stronger and their joints more able to handle their size. Plus - the ratio of weight to body strength is much lower in a 6 foot tall man who weighs 300 pounds, than in a 5'4" woman who weighs the same. And when you factor in the possible damage to joints and soft tissue a fat woman may already have... well, you just can't compare fat women and drag queens - at least not as far as shoes .


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## AnnMarie (Nov 5, 2008)

I love the look of some heels and super cute shoes, but they'll never be a reality for me... they just don't fit and if they do fit, the construction of my body and legs/ankles will not allow comfort or ability to walk in them. I can do a small (up to 2 on a platform) heel/wedge (I'm better on a wedge). 

So, for me it's a simple physics issue... they just don't work for me at all, but I want them terribly. So I look and drool and bemoan my "cute shoe"-less fate.


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## sweet&fat (Nov 5, 2008)

I adore heels, and have never related wearing them to my weight except in terms of my physical comfort. Being in a walking city, they do however fall into categories of walking heels, heels for activities within 5 or so blocks of my place, and "don't my legs look fantastic sitting at dinner/ in a cab" heels.  Recently, I've been off them and have been wearing comfy shoes, but I do knock them out now and then!


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## olwen (Nov 5, 2008)

I would love to wear them and I like how cute they can be. I find myself staring longingly at high heeled feet when I'm on the train or the bus or just anywhere. If I were thin I'd surely wear them. I just would never wear them cause they are painful, I can't walk in them for very long. 3 inches for An hour tops. I'd only wear them in the bedroom cause I wouldn't have to walk around. 

As much as I'd love to be able to wear heels, I also find myself making fun of women who wear spike heels. 5inch spike heels! This is a walking city. You just do a lot of walking here on concrete that is cracked in places, with grates that have holes that are big enough for spike heels to fall thru, uneven ground, rain, snow, etc. Walking is just unavoidable, so heels are totally impractical and half the time the thin women wearing them look like they're clearly in pain as they hobble down the street. In my head I say "Silly human." or "Stupid bitch," depending upon my mood. 

I can understand your ex's reaction and I can see how she would interpret the gift as a sign that you might not have been paying attention to whatever. Or she might see them as your way of saying you don't like her the way she is...I'm not saying that's true. I'm just saying maybe that was on her mind. But you know her better than I do.

That being said, if my SO bought me a pair of heels that fit, I'd smile, put them on, and slink on over to the bedroom. 

Also, I'm not really very girly and neither are any of my fat friends. We just don't talk about fashion or clothes and such.

Oh and heels that are made for drag queens generally have steel rods in them for reinforcement, so no broken heels.


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## Ash (Nov 5, 2008)

I love them, and I can and do wear them at 400+ pounds. However, it's important to note that walking is infinitely more comfortable than standing in heels, and, even then, distance is a factor. I'm not going to be wearing them if I'm going to be walking clear across campus at work. 

It's different for every fat girl. AnnMarie and I are the same height and weight, but what works for her doesn't always work for me and vice versa. There are far more factors in play here than how big the girl is. 

As for me, I have a bit of a shoe addiction, and I own far, far too many pair, but I would love it if an SO bought me a lovely pair of heels.


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## Shosh (Nov 6, 2008)

When I was at my heaviest weight of 300 pounds I still did not often wear heels, as I had trouble with walking in general. 

I prefer the look and feel of wedges. You can get many cute styles and looks in wedge heels.


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## tattooU (Nov 6, 2008)

Yes, 4.5 inches is quite a height to attempt if she's never really worn heels before. Even if it's only to get from one side of the bedroom to another, it takes quite a bit of practice to get comfortable in wearing heels. Especially very high heels. 

It sounds to me as if she simply needed to learn how to walk in them. i can teeter along in 4 inch heels, provided they have a platform of 1/2 an inch or more. So technically, 3 inches is my limit. Anything higher are considered "sittin' shoes" (at least that's my family friendly term  ) But i only started wearing heels about 3 years ago, it's taken a while to get comfortable at such a height!


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## cherylharrell (Nov 6, 2008)

I love heels but they don't lvoe me. They really hurt my feet so I don't wear them much. I once wore heels with dress pants to a funeral home viewing and by the end of the nite was in so much pain. So most of the time I wear comfy shoes...


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## kayrae (Nov 6, 2008)

Love heels. I can wear a 4-incher comfortably. Unfortunately, I live in the city and there are TONS of hills here and walking is crucial. So I try not to even bust them out unless I know there's a car involved somewhere. Or flats in the purse (just in case). But it took me a couple of years to work up to that. I had the exact same fears everyone mentioned. But I do indulge and wear them around the house for my personal pleasure. (And psst... reading this thread made me do just that).

And no, I wouldn't get mad at someone for buying me shoes. It's hard to complain with a gift.


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## shazz2602 (Nov 6, 2008)

*Have you ever felt compelled to join in the girly talk about heels just because?*

Not really although im a girl i dont find shoes that pretty just because im a size 10-12 and its hard to find nice shoes in that size

*Do you avoid high heels (or stick to certain styles) despite loving them because they cause great physical discomfort?*

I do avoid heels but thats more because i can't walk in them i do have some heels but they hurt if i walk or stand in them for a long time, i think for 2 reasons the first probably my weight and secondly because 99.9% of my life ive worn flat shoes becuase ive always had wide big feet and its not easy to find heels so i guess im just not used to them.

*Have you ever felt like you shouldn't be wearing them because of your size, assuming they fit perfectly and are relatively comfortable?*

Not at all thats like saying i shouldnt wear tights or a certain top because of my size.

*For shoes that are clearly impractical, what do you think of confining them for use in the bedroom only?*

why not all good fun 

*Will you be insulted if your partner buys you heels?*

My boyfriend doesnt have my style taste and i don't think he would buy me somthing that he knows i might not like.


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## Red (Nov 6, 2008)

I never really wear heels in the daytime unless it's like a wedding or something. I like to reserve wearing heels for nights out, in the summer I love wedges as I find them comfy and pretty easy to walk in. Around this time of year I love kitten heels or heels of about 3" with a small platform front, great for nights out, dinner or just when I feel like being a fancy pants. If I know I'm up for a night or dancing/walking I'm a lot less grumpy in flats but I would love to be one of those Doris' who can walk in heels all day in reality I don't think it's that good for the legs/posture/spine.


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## jewels_mystery (Nov 6, 2008)

Have you ever felt compelled to join in the girly talk about heels just because? No, that would be a waste of my time. 

Do you avoid high heels (or stick to certain styles) despite loving them because they cause great physical discomfort? I love heels but can't wear them anymore. My knees are shot. But I miss them. Nothing makes me feel more sexy than a pair of heels. Of course I wear them in the house on occassion. :wubu:

Have you ever felt like you shouldn't be wearing them because of your size, assuming they fit perfectly and are relatively comfortable? No.

For shoes that are clearly impractical, what do you think of confining them for use in the bedroom only? Of course, especially if he crawls for it. lol

Will you be insulted if your partner buys you heels? Hell NO!! I may wear them while I am cooking a meal.


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## bellyjelly (Nov 6, 2008)

Cors said:


> I was reading the shoe thread as usual, and got reminded of this incident.
> 
> When I was with my BBW ex, I decided to buy her this pair of heels because she constantly talked about how cute they are and how she would love to wear them. I even measured her feet including the width to make sure that I get the right size.
> 
> ...



Never

Ok, this is saying my message is too short


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## HottiMegan (Nov 6, 2008)

I don't even know how to walk in heels without looking like a goof. I love them too! the ones i can walk in get uncomfortable really quickly on my toes and feet. I am also 4 inches taller than my husband and he looks freakily short when i wear heels  I can be barefoot sometimes and feel like i'm towering over him. I do love how they look though, heels are sexy and make me feel sexy. 

I would die from shock if my husband were to buy me heels. He complains at all the shoes that feel comfy in teh store but after an outting my feet are covered in blisters and the shoes get retired to the shoe shelf to collect dust.


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## Rowan (Nov 6, 2008)

SamanthaNY said:


> I doubt it's anything to do with her size, though, I'm guessing there.
> 
> 4-inch heels generally don't work for any woman of significant size because as the heel is raised, all of the weight is transferred to the ball of the foot - and no amount of padding in the world is going to allow you to comfortably carry 300+ (*generally*, this is - some girls can do it, some can't) for any amount of distance - even if the fit is perfect and they're comfy. It's simply too much weight on a small joint. Add to that fact the tendency for increased size to mean increased need for stability and balance - both of which are challenged in heels, exponentially so with increased heights. Also - any compromise of other joints, knees, hips, ankles, back... will be further taxed by high heels. The spine in particular takes a beating because heels actually change the position and curvature of the spine by requiring different muscles for balance. This is exacerbated in large women, particularly those that have a big tummy - it pulls balance forward.
> 
> ...



this is a ditto for me. I adore them, but cant wear them for anything other than sit and look pretty shoes *pout*


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## GWARrior (Nov 6, 2008)

Heels can be really sexy, but I much prefer big chunky boots. My favorite pair are dark purple, lace-up kneehighs, with about a 2.5 inch lift. Its kinda crazy walking in them, cause they raise me up so high, but dammit they are HOT.

I also love wedges in the summer. :wubu:


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## Aurora (Nov 7, 2008)

They say if you want to wear heels, you should start with a low heel and work your way up. My feet are just now getting comfortable with 1 1/2 chunk sandals lol. At first the pressure on the balls of my feet made them really sore, but not so much anymore - I can wear them walking across campus for 10 mins and do pretty good.

I love heels, but my posture isn't that great (working on it now!) and I think I'd have trouble walking in high heels. I hope to some day though. They're so hot!


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## Your Plump Princess (Nov 8, 2008)

Tooz said:


> Have you ever felt compelled to join in the girly talk about heels just because?
> 
> No.
> 
> ...


This is my Exact Response to the questions posed..and I mean, EXACT! :O


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## thatgirl08 (Nov 8, 2008)

Have you ever felt compelled to join in the girly talk about heels just because?

Absolutely! I love talking about shoes. 

Do you avoid high heels (or stick to certain styles) despite loving them because they cause great physical discomfort?

I only wear kitten heels and wedges. I do have a few pairs of other types of heels that I will wear on a special occasion if I know I'm going to be sitting the majority of the time or will be able to take them off after a short period of time. 

Have you ever felt like you shouldn't be wearing them because of your size, assuming they fit perfectly and are relatively comfortable?

If they fit good and they were comfortable, hell yeah I'd wear them. 

For shoes that are clearly impractical, what do you think of confining them for use in the bedroom only?

Sure! 

Will you be insulted if your partner buys you heels?

Nope.


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## activistfatgirl (Nov 17, 2008)

Personally, and I recognize I'm an anomaly, I hate heels. I have wide feet, crappy knees, and I just don't LIKE feeling that girly tall thing that they make you feel. I like to feel substantive, in control, and I feel that in a different way than I imagine the substantive , in control feeling women get from the perfect pair of heels. I tend to be jealous of mens shoes, because they are comfortable, though I have no other real gender variance. 

But I'm with gwar, the one and only place I'll ever allow a heel into my life again is on the perfect pair of kick ass knee high man stomper boots, IF I can't find them flat.


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## tinkerbell (Nov 18, 2008)

Have you ever felt compelled to join in the girly talk about heels just because?

of course! I love talking about shoes. 

Do you avoid high heels (or stick to certain styles) despite loving them because they cause great physical discomfort?

I have a hard time finding any shoes that fit my feet well, so I'm used to wearing uncomfortable shoes. So I'll wear heels even if they hurt my feet  

Have you ever felt like you shouldn't be wearing them because of your size, assuming they fit perfectly and are relatively comfortable?

I used to feel weird wearing heels because of my height, but that was back when I was in jr/hs and was taller than a lot of people. Now the height thing doesn't bother me, and I've never not worn a certain type of shoe because I'm fat. If I see a shoe that I like, and can find my size, I'll wear it 

For shoes that are clearly impractical, what do you think of confining them for use in the bedroom only?

I have no problem with that

Will you be insulted if your partner buys you heels?

I cant imagine he would, but I wouldn't mind if he did.


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## seavixen (Nov 23, 2008)

Oooh. This thread is kind of old, but that's not enough to deter me from talking about shoes. I have a closet full of heels I don't often wear, but sometimes the urge strikes me and I totter around in them. My limit is 3 1/2 to 4 inches, and I am not very steady in them - so I walk as little as I can. The toe also makes a big difference, with that extra pressure. I tend to avoid heels if I am going to be walking on any sort of non-solid surface, as I sink ridiculously.

Have you ever felt compelled to join in the girly talk about heels just because?
Yes. I love talking about shoes, even though there are so few that fit me...

Do you avoid high heels (or stick to certain styles) despite loving them because they cause great physical discomfort?
Yes and no. It depends on how much I want to wear them and how much I need to be walking around; I'll generally buy them anyway if I can get them on my feet and I'm in love with them. I can always wear them and not walk around.

Have you ever felt like you shouldn't be wearing them because of your size, assuming they fit perfectly and are relatively comfortable?
I don't feel like I shouldn't wear anything because of my size. I wear what I feel comfortable in, both in terms of physical and psychological comfort; I will wear something that I feel I look good in even if it is uncomfortable before I will wear something I look crummy in just because it's cozy.

For shoes that are clearly impractical, what do you think of confining them for use in the bedroom only?
Bedroom, photography, etc... absolutely. Why waste those shoes that would probably kill me if I walked in them? One doesn't have to be standing to look fantastic.

Will you be insulted if your partner buys you heels?
No way! But there are women who are insulted by their significant others buying them lingerie, too, so maybe it's something like that. I happen to love that type of gift; it makes a girl feel adored and desirable.


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## Inflatable Girl (Nov 23, 2008)

_Have you ever felt compelled to join in the girly talk about heels just because?

_

You know what I don't want to chat about, jeans. 22" calves are not a denim wearers friend. Shoes, heels in particular, I can wax poetic about anytime.
Plus they look great with skirts.  

_Do you avoid high heels (or stick to certain styles) despite loving them because they cause great physical discomfort?
_
I started wearing heels when I was very young - I think I've trained my body to be so accustomed to them that I feel awkward without them. Not to say I want to climb the hills of SF wearing 5" stilettos, but I always have some type of heel on. There are a number of brands that are wonderfully cushioned (and way cute) that take a lot of the pressure off the ball of the foot. Construction is everything, and a quality heel will balance the load along the arch and ball of the foot. And note, by quality I do not mean cost - My favorite pair of 4" spectator pumps are from Target & cost $20.00. They are so comfortable for standing and walking. 

_Have you ever felt like you shouldn't be wearing them because of your size, assuming they fit perfectly and are relatively comfortable?_

Never once. I would never deny myself the option of wearing something I enjoy. Big or small, confidence sells the look.
I have very large legs and I think heels call attention to my calves and thighs and let people know I'm proud of how I look and I'm not going to hide features I consider attributes.

_For shoes that are clearly impractical, what do you think of confining them for use in the bedroom only?
_

Well, there are certainly heels that function as bedroom slippers, as a general rule, no.

_Will you be insulted if your partner buys you heels?
_

Were I so fortunate as to have someone indulged my shoe fancy I would be one happy gal.


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## Fascinita (Nov 23, 2008)

Have you ever felt compelled to join in the girly talk about heels just because? 

*No. I like heels, though I can only wear them for a special occasion. Can't run around and live my life in them, but I love them for "dress up."*


Do you avoid high heels (or stick to certain styles) despite loving them because they cause great physical discomfort? 

*I only avoid them for daily living. They are not comfortable for running around in. When I was thinner (150-190, maybe), I could wear them regularly. But they're fine for going out to dinner, etc. If it's a situation where I have the luxury of just looking pretty (i.e., if someone else is taking care of transportation and of making me comfortable), I love to wear them. This is rare in my life these days, however.*

Have you ever felt like you shouldn't be wearing them because of your size, assuming they fit perfectly and are relatively comfortable? 

*No. I never let my size define internally what I can and can't, will or won't do.
*

For shoes that are clearly impractical, what do you think of confining them for use in the bedroom only? 

*Fine. Let's do that. 
*

Will you be insulted if your partner buys you heels?

*No. I'd be flattered and feel special, just as I would with any other gift from a partner. I can understand why this might vary from person to person, however. Maybe the heels would act as a reminder of just how limited a woman feels in her size. If your partner doesn't want to play that way, it would be good to try to understand.*


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