# Being stood up....



## tink977 (Apr 19, 2007)

How many of you have been stood up? I was wondering if I were the only person in the world that this happens to....yes, more than once.  Why ask someone out if you aren't going to bother showing up?

And, how many of you out there have stood someone up and why?


----------



## ebonyprincess (Apr 19, 2007)

I was stood up last week soo not good for the ego LOL


----------



## Ruby Ripples (Apr 19, 2007)

I've been stood up in the past, it's horrible. No, I've never stood anyone up, it's just too nasty for words so I couldn't do it. 

Hope you feel better now, about it. Just think though, what an ass that guy is, so you know now and can move on.


----------



## tink977 (Apr 19, 2007)

As embarassing as it is....I'll speak the truth here (if you can't be yourself here, where can you be?), but I was stood up more than once by the same guy. Three times to be totally honest. (who's the ass?....I am).
But you know, I don't feel bad about it at all. He's the one with some sort of emotional hang-up and I'm not going to let his problems become mine. My thoughts on it.....closet FA.


----------



## dreamer72fem (Apr 19, 2007)

I met a guy online once and we talked for awhile. And then we talked on the phone alot. He lived in Chicago which is only a couple hours or so away and he asked what I thought about him grabbing the Southshore Train over to visit some weekend. So we made the plans...he was getting a hotel near me and coming for a night. So I talked to him on the phone while he was at work that day and he told me...well I am off to grab my overnight bag and shall grab the train. The train he was on was getting in at 11 p.m. so I was going to be there to pick him up. I get to the station and I see the train coming and have that nervous/excited stomach thing going on. Well it stops and I am watching people get off and he isnt there. Well the next say I call his work and one of the guys there says he wasnt there but was coming in soon. He calls and apologizes and says a work meeting kept him and blah blah. So I call back a bit later that day and that other guy answered the phone. He tells me he had no clue this guy was even going anywhere that weekend because they had all this overtime work. I just never called him again. If you dont want to meet someone..just tell them. grrrr...lol
Stacey


----------



## DeniseW (Apr 19, 2007)

I think everyone has been stood up at least once in their lives. It sounds like he's playing a game with you and you don't need me to tell you that you're playing right into his hands. He's a loser and not worthy of another second of your time. 3 strikes you're out!!!


----------



## Jes (Apr 19, 2007)

what is so nonsensical to me is that from all the stories i've heard, it's generally the person pushing for a meeting or a date, or doing the organizing, that does the no-show. I guess people WANT to believe the best about themselves: it doesn't matter if we don't get along. looks don't matter. it's not important if we don't have xyz in common. if i meet her and like her (or him) i'll have no problem introducing her to my family and friends. We THINK those things but we don't FEEL them or DO them. But we can't admit that to ourselves b/c we're holding out hope that we're not that shallow.

In the end, we disappoint ourslves. And someone else, in the process.


----------



## ATrueFA (Apr 19, 2007)

I'm the undisputed king of being stood up, my record was 4 times in one month (by 4 different women) and more than 12 times in one year. At first I used to give them a second chance but I got stood up a 2nd time every single time so I stopped giving 2nd chances. It really sucks that some people would rather stand you up instead of just saying that they are not really interested, though I am sure some people also do it for sport. I don't do that to people, I was brought up to be honest with people.

Dave


----------



## Jes (Apr 19, 2007)

i hate to turn anything back on anyone and i don't know how y'all go about your bidness, but don't discount the pool from which you're choosing, too. a total stranger on the innernets may never have been free in the first place and may have been living out a kooky fantasy unrelated to you. The guys in chat, for example, with their: let's type for 30 min, and then I'll tell you I love you and have bought a plane ticket...

well.


----------



## BubbleButtBabe (Apr 19, 2007)

I have been stood up a few times...Size makes no difference..I had it done to me when I weighed 120lbs..People play games and want to see how far they can take it..Doesn't matter that they hurt some one else..They just get their jollies this way...

I have a very deep voice for a woman..I damaged my vocal cords when I was a kid living in Denver for 1 summer,plus I smoke so my voice is pretty deep and raspy...Anyways,I had a guy tell me he stood me up because he knew as deep as my voice was I had to weigh about 400lbs,of course I didn't..I did tell him what I thought of his parentage and which end of the horse I thought he belonged to and what he did to his mother ( you can figure out which cuss words I used...LOL)...

I do not give any one a second chance if they stood me up once..I am done with them..I figure if they can do it once they will keep doing it because they think I am willing to take it..


----------



## Tooz (Apr 19, 2007)

I'd ditch someone after the first time they'd stood me up. It's never happened to me, but I have no tolerance for that. :x


----------



## Arrhythmia (Apr 19, 2007)

I've been stood up in my lifetime. And the thing is...it's not just potential lovers that's doing it, but those I've scheduled for business meetings, as well! I started putting the blame all on me as the reason why, but BULL! There is no excuse in the world for standing someone up. Everyone and their Grandmother has a cellphone...USE IT!


----------



## Paw Paw (Apr 19, 2007)

It has happened before. The worst times are when they don't even answer the phone.

No second chances. I have the uncanny ability to amuse myself almost anywhere.

Peace,
2P.


----------



## Dr. Feelgood (Apr 19, 2007)

One of the saddest experiences I've ever had; I met a woman -- this was _years_ ago -- got to talking, asked her to have dinner with me the next evening. When I came by for her she was all dressed up and obviously relieved. "I didn't think you'd come," she said. "My girlfriend said you'd stand me up." I felt so bad for her, feeling that way about herself.


----------



## Violet_Beauregard (Apr 19, 2007)

I genuinely sympathize, but I hope you aren't going to let it be a fourth time. I'm all for giving a guy a chance, and I've put up with crap that I NEVER should have put up with, but in this case, he's just being shitty. He's totally screwing with you and he knows it.

Walk away. There ARE other fish in the sea. It may not seem like it, but there will be a time when the right fish will come along. I know exactly how you feel and even *I* believe that the right one will come along. I've put up with garbage from guys because I thought "something is better than nothing." No, it's really not. Common courtesy and decency is all that any of us deserve, and he's not even giving you that. 

Walk away. 

Good luck!





tink977 said:


> As embarassing as it is....I'll speak the truth here (if you can't be yourself here, where can you be?), but I was stood up more than once by the same guy. Three times to be totally honest. (who's the ass?....I am).
> But you know, I don't feel bad about it at all. He's the one with some sort of emotional hang-up and I'm not going to let his problems become mine. My thoughts on it.....closet FA.


----------



## SamanthaNY (Apr 19, 2007)

I was stood up once - and it's a crappy feeling. I remember I felt bad about myself... but at the same time, I felt somehow instantly better than the man that stood me up. I also did it once, stood someone up - and that feeling was almost worse. It was a mix of feeling wanted, but then pressured, and then guilt, for 1) not being able to stand up for myself and say no; 2) not being able to do the right thing and face up to him; and 3) knowing that my actions - and my actions alone, probably made someone feel crappy about themselves. But I also can't deny that there was a 'bad girl' feeling about it too - and that was almost cool. 

It can't always be avoided, but I think if getting stood up appears to be a pattern in one's life - then it's something to be examined and dealt with. That's not to be taken as assigning blame - but if there's 25 'stood-ups' in your history (whether you've done it, or had it done to you), then *you* are the common denominator. And there's really no good excuse for not trying to fix it. Someone who takes advantage of other people is no better than the type of person who wears "victim" on their sleeve like a badge of honor.



tink977 said:


> but I was stood up more than once by the same guy. Three times to be totally honest. (who's the ass?....I am).
> But you know, I don't feel bad about it at all. He's the one with some sort of emotional hang-up and I'm not going to let his problems become mine. My thoughts on it.....closet FA.


 
In a way, I hope you do feel bad, but only in the sense of what you did to _yourself_, by letting him do that to you two more times. You weren't taking care of yourself then (and that's your problem - which enables him to follow though on his). I hope you are taking care of yourself now.


----------



## sweetnnekked (Apr 19, 2007)

I haven't had many dates but I've been stood up twice.
Both times were by women who got me all pumped up by telling me that they were attracted to me due to my size!
This is why I find it hard to believe that FFA's are for real.
Once is probable for anyone. But twice?


----------



## BigCutieSasha (Apr 19, 2007)

I've been stood up numerous times. But one time in specific stands out most to me. This one time when I was 19 I think, I was at my Moms house and I invited an online friend over who I had never met( stupid? Yes... won't ever do that again) and he was going to take me out to dinner. He showed up and I could see the look of disappointment on his face about my looks (I'm sure my size had most to do with it even though I told him I was plus size). So when it was time to leave for dinner I said let me write my mom a note to where I'm going and he said he would go warm up the car. As I was locking the doors and walking outside I noticed him driving off. He had just ditched me. Now that was a blow to the ego. So in a way I was stood up and ditched.


----------



## Aliena (Apr 19, 2007)

Yeahuuup, I've been stood up twice. The first time I was glad and relieved. It was one of those situations via the Internet and he kind of creeped me out. I was only meeting him at his insistance. 

The second time was at another guys insistance. I was a little hurt by him not showing up, because he had me smitten with curiousity. However, instead of going home that evening and being sad, I went to a pub that was a hangout for me at the time and met a totally, different, wonderful guy. He was from Ireland and we sat at the bar all night just talking about life and life's philosophies. We didn't go home together or anything and that was the first and last time I saw him, but we had such a fantastic night together. I did get a kiss and it was one of those star-blazing kisses. I'll never forget him. So yeah, the negative turned into a positive. 

Oh wait, I just remembered---:doh: 


My hubby stood me up on our first time to meet!! I was so mad and was not ever going to give him a second chance. Boy did fate have a different route for me to take. I still give him a hard time about it. He whines that he was sick; I say he was chicken!!!


----------



## ebonyprincess (Apr 19, 2007)

What a scumbag

I would had got the nearest thing to hand and thrown it at his car ... well ok I wouldn't had but the thought of it put a smile on my face LOL

He must had been blind you're beautiful !!



BigCutieSasha said:


> I've been stood up numerous times. But one time in specific stands out most to me. This one time when I was 19 I think, I was at my Moms house and I invited an online friend over who I had never met( stupid? Yes... won't ever do that again) and he was going to take me out to dinner. He showed up and I could see the look of disappointment on his face about my looks (I'm sure my size had most to do with it even though I told him I was plus size). So when it was time to leave for dinner I said let me write my mom a note to where I'm going and he said he would go warm up the car. As I was locking the doors and walking outside I noticed him driving off. He had just ditched me. Now that was a blow to the ego. So in a way I was stood up and ditched.


----------



## Violet_Beauregard (Apr 19, 2007)

Ok, THAT is not right.... what a total asshole...... What a freaking coward.... he couldn't even be an damn gentleman and go thru with the dinner? Even if the attraction was not there, he could have been a friend and gone to dinner. What a piece of shit.





BigCutieSasha said:


> As I was locking the doors and walking outside I noticed him driving off. He had just ditched me.


----------



## BigCutieSasha (Apr 19, 2007)

Its ok... I was hurt extremely bad at the time, but later didn't care. If hes going to be a big pussy about it all I was better off in the end. I later ended up dating a very nice guy for about 6 months. So it wasn't so bad after all. Pity though, I was looking forward to a steak dinner he promised.


----------



## Waxwing (Apr 19, 2007)

I'm going to be the voice of asshole here and admit that I have stood someone up. 



I feel really bad about it to this day.


----------



## Violet_Beauregard (Apr 19, 2007)

LOLOL... for that alone, I'd have been pissed off!! LOLOL




BigCutieSasha said:


> I was looking forward to a steak dinner he promised.


----------



## Violet_Beauregard (Apr 19, 2007)

Tsk, tsk, tsk.... BUT, at least you realize it wasn't nice. If you just didn't give a darn, that would be worse. 






Waxwing said:


> I'm going to be the voice of asshole here and admit that I have stood someone up.
> 
> 
> 
> I feel really bad about it to this day.


----------



## Green Eyed Fairy (Apr 19, 2007)

I have always found an IMMENSE amount of satisfaction when a man stands me up and then calls to ask me out again (Yes, this has happened to me on several occasions in my life- believe it or not) so I have the opportunity to then be pleasant as summer rain- and then stand his ass up


----------



## Allie Cat (Apr 19, 2007)

I've never been stood up.

Once I pseudo stood someone up... it was more like, we'd kind of made plans to go out at some point in the future, but it wasn't definite... then neither of us called each other ever again x.x

I did get dumped at my junior prom though. >.<

=Divals


----------



## tink977 (Apr 19, 2007)

I'm glad I'm not the only person out there being stood up numerous times. I still can't help but worry that everytime I make a date with someone...it will happen again (Thank God for those that show up). If I say yes to someone, come hell or high water, I will be there. And down here in New Orleans, sometimes hell and high water take place...lol.


----------



## Waxwing (Apr 19, 2007)

Violet_Beauregard said:


> Tsk, tsk, tsk.... BUT, at least you realize it wasn't nice. If you just didn't give a darn, that would be worse.



Oh god no. It was an awful thing to do! I wasn't the most sensitive of gals when I was younger. Yeah, I'll call you..etc. I was pretty much a chick version of a frat guy. 

But still all these years later I wish that I could find that guy and apologize. He probably doesn't remember, but I still feel ashamed.


----------



## Chimpi (Apr 19, 2007)

Arrhythmia said:


> There is no excuse in the world for standing someone up. Everyone and their Grandmother has a cellphone...USE IT!



That is not true. I do not have a cell phone, nor do I care to get one anytime soon.  Therefor, it is not as easy as you make it out to be. But, yes, _most_ people do have cell phones.



BigCutieSasha said:


> Now that was a blow to the ego.



Not to attempt to heighten your ego or anything, because I know you are well passed what a piece of crap that specific guy is/was, he sure missed out on one hell of a girl. You have the distinct pleasure to know that there are guys that would take someones left arm off for a chance to meet you and have a romantic dinner with you. :bow: In other words, smile, you're on candid camera!

*EDIT:* No, I have never been stood up, nor have I done the stoodying up. There was one time I was going to meet a girl for some sort of lunch date, in which we met online, but before the date I called her and told her that I was no longer willing to meet her. I had a very bad feeling about it, for whatever reason. At least I called, though!


----------



## liz (di-va) (Apr 19, 2007)

Being stood-up sucks. Has happened to me at least a few times, although really, once is too many! Once is also enough that for the rest of your life (am I exaggerating? maybe not) when you tell a maitre d' or bartender, "No, thanks, I'm waiting for somebody," when they want to seat you at a restaurant, you will immediately feel like you've jinxed things--that the other person won't show up. Standing someone up is a major violation of respect and social contract.

The thing that drives me crazy these days is that there are now other ways to stand people up--"milder" but still annoying forms. Like "I'll call you on Monday to set a time and place" (but they don't) cell-phone-y kinda stuff. Casual casual. Not into that either.


----------



## Butterbelly (Apr 19, 2007)

BigCutieSasha said:


> I've been stood up numerous times. But one time in specific stands out most to me. This one time when I was 19 I think, I was at my Moms house and I invited an online friend over who I had never met( stupid? Yes... won't ever do that again) and he was going to take me out to dinner. He showed up and I could see the look of disappointment on his face about my looks (I'm sure my size had most to do with it even though I told him I was plus size). So when it was time to leave for dinner I said let me write my mom a note to where I'm going and he said he would go warm up the car. As I was locking the doors and walking outside I noticed him driving off. He had just ditched me. Now that was a blow to the ego. So in a way I was stood up and ditched.



I've had one experience similiar to this. I met a guy through friends of mine at a party. We chatted briefly about literature and photography. Later that evening, as I was leaving the party, he asked for my phone number. I was thrilled, to say the least. He was nice looking, well-dressed, pleasant, and had A BRAIN...all major pluses. 

He calls me the next day and asks me out to dinner for the following evening. I accepted the dinner invitation and gave him directions to my apartment. The following evening, he comes to pick me up. He has our date all planned out...a nice dinner at a local place, followed by going to a local coffee shoppe. 

We get to the restaurant and we're seated next to a couple I know from the university. I speak to this couple and introduce my "friend" to them. We exchange greetings and finally sit at our table. As soon as I sit down, my date starts grilling me on political and religous views. Immediately, I become tense and feel like I'm being interviewed. I try to take the conversation in a different direction, but he keeps coming back to my views on abortion and religion. Our waitress arrives and takes our orders...and I'm relieved for a little break in the stressful conversation. As soon as the waitress leaves, he starts up again. Finally, I asked him to please change the subject since it was making me uncomfortable. He looks at me like I'm totally insane. He stands up, throws his napkin down in the seat, and tells me that I've wasted his time, but that I won't be wasting his money...and that he can't stand me and thinks I'm a snob.

He practically yells this, and the couple sitting next to us looks over with this horrible shocked look on their face. I instantly start crying big crocodile tears, and the asshole totally walks away from me...and LEAVES ME AT THE RESTAURANT. Mind you, I didn't have a ride home. I was mortified about his behavior, and even more embarrassed that I'm left sitting at the table while people are staring at me.

Luckily for me, the couple sitting next to me that I knew took me home, and also paid for my dinner. 

Two days later, this asshole calls me like nothing ever happened. He got an earful from me before I hung up on him.


----------



## Violet_Beauregard (Apr 19, 2007)

Well, we've all done things in our younger days that we regret... myself included. 

Don't feel ashamed... like I said, if you didn't care that it happened, it would be different. You've grown as a person and you've learned from that. That makes you a better person as it is. Kudos to you!






Waxwing said:


> Oh god no. It was an awful thing to do! I wasn't the most sensitive of gals when I was younger. Yeah, I'll call you..etc. I was pretty much a chick version of a frat guy.
> 
> But still all these years later I wish that I could find that guy and apologize. He probably doesn't remember, but I still feel ashamed.


----------



## elle camino (Apr 19, 2007)

twice.
once, on my one and only blind date (ever), i got to the bar a little early, sat down, waited for like an hour, went home and got the following email:
'hi. i'm really sorry, but when i walked in and saw you i realized i could never be seen in public with someone your size. i hope you had a good night anyways.'

yep.


the second time was way worse, if you can believe that.


----------



## SamanthaNY (Apr 19, 2007)

holy crap
just... wow, at some of these assholes.


----------



## Sandie_Zitkus (Apr 19, 2007)

I have never been stood-up. But I did stand someone up once. I felt bad about it afterwards.


----------



## Violet_Beauregard (Apr 19, 2007)

Ok, that is god damned rude. Even if I didn't find the person attractive...according to my tastes, I would NEVER say that to them, either to their face or to in an email. 

I would have been very tempted to email him back and tell him where to go and how to get there...in a hurry.

What an effing asshole..... 





elle camino said:


> twice.
> once, on my one and only blind date (ever), i got to the bar a little early, sat down, waited for like an hour, went home and got the following email:
> 'hi. i'm really sorry, but when i walked in and saw you i realized i could never be seen in public with someone your size. i hope you had a good night anyways.'


----------



## elle camino (Apr 19, 2007)

i have to say, just as a word of warning to the ladytypes around here....like i said the second guy was WAY worse than the first one, and the second guy was someone i met here on dimensions.
so.


yep again.


----------



## SamanthaNY (Apr 19, 2007)

I don't see how it could possibly be worse than the email story - without naming names (tho hopefully you've warned others privately), would you be willing to share what he did?


----------



## LoveBHMS (Apr 19, 2007)

elle camino said:


> i have to say, just as a word of warning to the ladytypes around here....like i said the second guy was WAY worse than the first one, and the second guy was someone i met here on dimensions.
> so.
> 
> 
> yep again.



Come on Elle...Please tell us the second story. We won't know who the guy is but he'll know and we'll all be like "man, what a dickhead, that guy must be the biggest loser on the planet" and he'll be reading it.

Oh, and first guy? I hope you emailed back that whatever you did that night it was clearly a better time then you'd have had with a classless, shallow, scum sucking piece of garbage with no brain, balls, or taste."


----------



## Waxwing (Apr 19, 2007)

Elle, seriously, give me that guy's name. I've got a crowbar right here. Damn. What an utter piece of crap. And I'm not just bein' nice. I'm not ever nice! But I've seeen you. :wubu:


----------



## Aliena (Apr 19, 2007)

LoveBHMS said:


> Come on Elle...Please tell us the second story. We won't know who the guy is but he'll know and we'll all be like "man, what a dickhead, that guy must be the biggest loser on the planet" and he'll be reading it.
> 
> Oh, and first guy? I hope you emailed back that whatever you did that night it was clearly a better time then you'd have had with a classless, shallow, scum sucking piece of garbage with no brain, balls, or taste."





Yeahuuup, I have to admit too that I'm pretty curious. I've had a bad experience as well with a guy from Dims. (turned out to be a blessing in disguise though) 


Butterbelly, I am so sorry that happened to you at the restaraunt. I can't believe someone would have the gall to do that to someone in public. I would have been mortified. 
I'm glad your friends were there to help you out though. I'm sure it was fate they were there; thank God!

These stories are just awful.


----------



## Green Eyed Fairy (Apr 19, 2007)

Butterbelly said:


> I've had one experience similiar to this. I met a guy through friends of mine at a party. We chatted briefly about literature and photography. Later that evening, as I was leaving the party, he asked for my phone number. I was thrilled, to say the least. He was nice looking, well-dressed, pleasant, and had A BRAIN...all major pluses.
> 
> He calls me the next day and asks me out to dinner for the following evening. I accepted the dinner invitation and gave him directions to my apartment. The following evening, he comes to pick me up. He has our date all planned out...a nice dinner at a local place, followed by going to a local coffee shoppe.
> 
> ...



Sounds like psychopath did you a HUGE favor to walk out on you........ trust me


----------



## Green Eyed Fairy (Apr 19, 2007)

I wasn't stood up but since we are talking about a bad experience with Dims guys, I had the wife of a man that had been messaging/calling me the past couple of months call me on my cell phone last Monday. I had asked him point blank if he was married- he said no. Yes, he approached me here on Dims. I hope he's reading this, too.


----------



## Aliena (Apr 19, 2007)

Green Eyed Fairy said:


> ...I had the wife of a man that had been messaging/calling me the past couple of months call me on my cell phone last Monday. I had asked him point blank if he was married- he said no. Yes, he approached me here on Dims. I hope he's reading this, too.



I had a simular experience about 5 years ago. I actually liked the wife, but I didn't know the guy was married. He ommited the information and I didn't think to ask, since he was "living" with his mother. (yeah, a desperate time for me)

I get an email from this woman asking me to please stop dating her husband. I didn't know who the heck this person was talking about. Then it hit me and I kicked him to the curb.


----------



## Green Eyed Fairy (Apr 19, 2007)

Aliena said:


> I had a simular experience about 5 years ago. I actually liked the wife, but I didn't know the guy was married. He ommited the information and I didn't think to ask, since he was "living" with his mother. (yeah, a desperate time for me)
> 
> I get this email from this woman asking me to please stop dating her husband. I didn't know who the heck this person was talking about. Then it hit me and I kicked him to the curb.




I was actually impressed with his wife in the brief time I spoke to her- and I was sure to tell him in my final message to him exactly how lucky he was to have her- and how lucky he was going to be if he kept her- after the crap he had just pulled.


----------



## Violet_Beauregard (Apr 19, 2007)

I'm speechless.... I don't even know how to respond to that....... There are not even words to explain someone like that. 

Bravo to you for telling him what you think...... 





Butterbelly said:


> I've had one experience similiar to this. I met a guy through friends of mine at a party. We chatted briefly about literature and photography. Later that evening, as I was leaving the party, he asked for my phone number. I was thrilled, to say the least. He was nice looking, well-dressed, pleasant, and had A BRAIN...all major pluses.
> 
> He calls me the next day and asks me out to dinner for the following evening. I accepted the dinner invitation and gave him directions to my apartment. The following evening, he comes to pick me up. He has our date all planned out...a nice dinner at a local place, followed by going to a local coffee shoppe.
> 
> ...


----------



## Luvs2laff (Apr 19, 2007)

BigCutieSasha said:


> I've been stood up numerous times. But one time in specific stands out most to me. This one time when I was 19 I think, I was at my Moms house and I invited an online friend over who I had never met( stupid? Yes... won't ever do that again) and he was going to take me out to dinner. He showed up and I could see the look of disappointment on his face about my looks (I'm sure my size had most to do with it even though I told him I was plus size). So when it was time to leave for dinner I said let me write my mom a note to where I'm going and he said he would go warm up the car. As I was locking the doors and walking outside I noticed him driving off. He had just ditched me. Now that was a blow to the ego. So in a way I was stood up and ditched.



That is horrible! You are so beautiful and, as one of the many guys here who would DIE to get to go on a date with you, I just cannot understand that idiot.


----------



## LoveBHMS (Apr 19, 2007)

Waxwing said:


> Elle, seriously, give me that guy's name. I've got a crowbar right here. Damn. What an utter piece of crap. And I'm not just bein' nice. I'm not ever nice! But I've seeen you. :wubu:



And i don't even like other women "that way" but if I walked into a bar and Elle were my blind date? I'd be like high fiving myself all over the place.


----------



## tink977 (Apr 20, 2007)

Its so hard to believe that there are that many assholes in the world...unless of course, we are all dating the same people that don't show up...lol. I cam across my guy on BBWDatefinder. Jason ring any bells? LOL.


----------



## Tooz (Apr 20, 2007)

elle camino said:


> twice.
> once, on my one and only blind date (ever), i got to the bar a little early, sat down, waited for like an hour, went home and got the following email:
> 'hi. i'm really sorry, but when i walked in and saw you i realized i could never be seen in public with someone your size. i hope you had a good night anyways.'
> 
> ...



Arrrrrrrrrrrre you seriousssssssssssssssssssssssssss

Jesus. That's so bad I almost have to laugh. The fact that the guy said that is just...wow. How incredibly stupid.

I wanna hear the other story! 

Also, I will go out on a blind date with you.:kiss2:


----------



## Paw Paw (Apr 20, 2007)

elle camino said:


> twice.
> once, on my one and only blind date (ever), i got to the bar a little early, sat down, waited for like an hour, went home and got the following email:
> 'hi. i'm really sorry, but when i walked in and saw you i realized i could never be seen in public with someone your size. i hope you had a good night anyways.'
> 
> ...



You're kidding right?

A blind man with a note in his mouth, could see that you are absolutely beautiful! Someone your size!!

If I walked in and saw you, I would walk out, say a prayer of thanks and run back in.

Well, I had a similar situation. I talked to a woman on the phone, and in emails. Finally met her after about 6mo. and I thought we had a good time. I have not heard from her since. I found out from the person that introduced us, that she thought I was too short. She is only 5'8" .

Peace,
2P.


----------



## _broshe_ (Apr 20, 2007)

Yeah, i've been stood up by people. happend twice,  

fortuneatly, in one case, the girl later revealed her true colors, so it was alittle easier to get over it


----------



## Jes (Apr 20, 2007)

Butterbelly said:


> I've had one experience similiar to this. I met a guy through friends of mine at a party. We chatted briefly about literature and photography. Later that evening, as I was leaving the party, he asked for my phone number. I was thrilled, to say the least. He was nice looking, well-dressed, pleasant, and had A BRAIN...all major pluses.
> 
> He calls me the next day and asks me out to dinner for the following evening. I accepted the dinner invitation and gave him directions to my apartment. The following evening, he comes to pick me up. He has our date all planned out...a nice dinner at a local place, followed by going to a local coffee shoppe.
> 
> ...


i know that hurt you horribly b/c it was TERRIBLE treatment, but reading this I'm left with the sense that this wasn't bad treatment of you as much as it was mental illness. Very, very clearly. Not strangeness or rudeness or anything but serious mental illness. The call a few days later proves it. Some people are just nuts.


----------



## Green Eyed Fairy (Apr 20, 2007)

Paw Paw said:


> You're kidding right?
> 
> A blind man with a note in his mouth, could see that you are absolutely beautiful! Someone your size!!
> 
> ...



She talks to you for six months, has a good time meeting you and then WON"T EVEN TALK TO YOU because of your height???????? Jeez, I'm going to be nice and not mention what this makes me think about her.......

That is no better than the treatment that some of the ladies on this board have gotten due to size- you were also mistreated due to size and that just sucks.


----------



## Butterbelly (Apr 20, 2007)

Jes said:


> i know that hurt you horribly b/c it was TERRIBLE treatment, but reading this I'm left with the sense that this wasn't bad treatment of you as much as it was mental illness. Very, very clearly. Not strangeness or rudeness or anything but serious mental illness. The call a few days later proves it. Some people are just nuts.



I found out later from two acquaintances that this guy has a few "issues." I wish someone would have said something to me at the party where I met the guy.


----------



## BigCutieSasha (Apr 20, 2007)

ButterBelly- OMG!!!! You win. I can't believe there are people out there who actuallt act like this towards a person! Good to hear you gave him some words on the phone later on. MAN! I hope hes single to this day.

Elle- I hear you on the guy making comments like that. I have had a few. But damn!!! Thats still effed up. Im going to agree with the other ladies here. I want to hear the second story. You should anonymusly embarrass that dickhead.


----------



## Paw Paw (Apr 20, 2007)

Green Eyed Fairy said:


> She talks to you for six months, has a good time meeting you and then WON"T EVEN TALK TO YOU because of your height???????? Jeez, I'm going to be nice and not mention what this makes me think about her.......
> 
> That is no better than the treatment that some of the ladies on this board have gotten due to size- you were also mistreated due to size and that just sucks.



After a while you get used to it. I mean, I was considered "normal " height for the first 12yrs. I am 39 now. Don't get me wrong, I have had my share of fun. 

When I was dancing, I had a straight job too. When one of the guys found out what my second job was, his comment was " I did'nt know you could do that for 12yy olds." . That kinda pissed me off. But I made up for it when I saw his wife at a show. You ladies are really worse than us guys, when it comes to dancers.

Peace,
2P.


----------



## Aliena (Apr 20, 2007)

Paw Paw said:


> After a while you get used to it. I mean, I was considered "normal " height for the first 12yrs. I am 39 now. Don't get me wrong, I have had my share of fun.
> Peace,
> 2P.




I can't imagine height being a deal breaker. I mean your eyes are amazing, you have a very good look to you, and intelligence to boot. O.K. I'll say it, she's an idiot!


----------



## Butterbelly (Apr 20, 2007)

I was talking to a girlfriend of mine last night, and we were discussing being "stood up." She told me that before she met her husband that she was suppose to go on a blind date with a guy, but he stood her up. A co-worker of hers had set the two up and given each other the phone numbers. My friend said the guy called her and they set a date to meet at the park, and had given her a description of his car. 

The day of the date, she arrived at the park where the two were suppose to meet, and waited for the guy. Eventually, she sees his car pull up. He gets out of the car, and walks in her direction, stops dead in his tracks, and starts looking around. She said she knew that he didn't recognize her, since neither had a picture of each other to go by, just a general description. She walks up to him and tells him who she is and he says "you have the wrong person." He gets back in his car and drives off.

She thought she was truly mistaken and continued to wait for her blind date, who never showed up. She called her co-worker who set up the date, and apparently the guy had also called the co-worker too. He had complained about my friend's size. Come to find out, the woman who set the date up had failed to mention to the guy that his date is plus-sized. My friend assumed that her co-worker had told the guy since he had agreed to go on a date with her. 

I told her he missed out on a terrific person. But the happy ending to the story is, two weeks later she met a guy through a fundraiser she was helping with and the two are now happily married. Just goes to show ya...the better guy got the girl.


----------



## elle camino (Apr 20, 2007)

sorry guys, i really didn't intend to write a cryptic post and never actually explain it, but this is like the third time i've tried to type up a little summary of what happened with fella #2, and i can't really go through with it. it's painful to even think about, much less try to put into words and organize in a concise, readable way. 
plus right now i'm reasonably convinced that there's _some_thing about me that's either physically or intellectually repulsive to boytypes, so there just doesn't seem to be much point in dwelling on one particular failure. 
[/raincloud]


----------



## Waxwing (Apr 20, 2007)

I hate that feeling, Elle. And when you're under that specific rainbcloud, a whole chorus o' internet love doesn't really help.


----------



## LoveBHMS (Apr 20, 2007)

Aliena said:


> I can't imagine height being a deal breaker. I mean your eyes are amazing, you have a very good look to you, and intelligence to boot. O.K. I'll say it, she's an idiot!



The fact that somebody does not want to date somebody short, or plus sized, or of a different ideology is not the issue. Either you're narrow minded or you have a good reason of your own for sticking to a certain type. That is not the issue. If you're an adult, you follow through with what you planned to do and then thank the person for their time. 

"It was nice to have met you, but I don't feel a romantic spark" or something along those lines is how normal, healthy, well mannered people handle this sort of thing.


----------



## Aliena (Apr 20, 2007)

LoveBHMS said:


> The fact that somebody does not want to date somebody short, or plus sized, or of a different ideology is not the issue. Either you're narrow minded or you have a good reason of your own for sticking to a certain type. That is not the issue. If you're an adult, you follow through with what you planned to do and then thank the person for their time.
> 
> "It was nice to have met you, but I don't feel a romantic spark" or something along those lines is how normal, healthy, well mannered people handle this sort of thing.



Yes, exactly, well said! She's not an idiot, she's just not a normal, healthy, or well mannered person! :happy:


----------



## Blackjack_Jeeves (Apr 20, 2007)

After reading some of these horrible stories (I still think "Abortion Man" was beyond foul), I just have one thing to say...

Friends don't let friends be dicks like this to their dates... Bad juju unto them....


----------



## MisticalMisty (Apr 20, 2007)

back in 2004 I believe I had 6 scheduled dates and 5 of them stood me up and the 6th one walked 20 steps in front of me the entire night.


What really pissed me off was that the guys are the ones that pursued me. They sat up the dates and they are the ones that didn't show up. That really is the worst feeling in the world. It's horrible, HORRIBLE. In this day and age..at least have the balls to send a freaking text message..SHEESH.


----------



## Krissy12 (Apr 20, 2007)

Oh my jeezzzus, these are horrid. My lovely stand up story:

A guy I had dated a couple of times called me and asked me to meet up with him at his apartment, where we would take his car to a resturant/movie. He said he was coming home from work, getting showered/ready and that we could meet right after. I showed up at the right time in some nice new high heel boots that sank into the grass walking up to his building, which was "just great" as it was. Of course, I get to his door and knock..No answer. I'm dressed up and ready to go out, so I start to feel like a loser. I walk back out to my car, sinking my new boots into the grass/mud combo some more, when I see him sitting watching me in some girl's car. They were laughing and trying to hide! WTF?

And that's why I went to prison for life..murder 1.


----------



## AnnMarie (Apr 20, 2007)

I'm quite sure I've been stood up many times... but never while waiting at a restaurant or bar, or while all dressed up to go and the car never comes. I think that's only because I've only been asked out on a "date" about 5 times in my entire life, so the odds were sort of low. 

I have, however, ditched someone... when I was about 19, and I still feel bad to this day. It was very odd circumstances, but I basically panicked... no excuse for it, but at the time "no confrontation" seemed the best route. I was wrong, but just not strong enough to do it the right way. 

Boo me.


----------



## BigCutieSasha (Apr 20, 2007)

I have in my life stood up a guy. BUT in my defense he was nothing like he said he was. He was a guy from online who had only a really old picture to share with me. So when I decided to meet him I said lets meet at the mall where there were plenty of people. I asked him what he was wearing and such so I could find him. Well my plan was to show up a tad late and look for him from afar to see if he was what he said he was. Well yeah.... he looked nothing like his picture. Same face but about a 10 year difference. He said he was 25, but he looked easily 35. He had little hair on his head and body type was nothing like he described. Now I'm really not one to hate on someone for apperance, but I was 20 years old. For all I know this was some creepy dude who WAS 35 trying to hook it up with a 20 yr old girl. I walked away and he didn't try calling me after that. So I don't think he was too upset.


----------



## Paw Paw (Apr 21, 2007)

You know what?

I have read these and come to the conclusion that that:

These idiots ( I mean illmannered people) make it so hard for guys like me. Men who want to sincerely date and perhaps find a relationship. But we end up spending time picking up the shit they dump. 

I have dated almost every race, size and height. So dammit, I deserve better than that.

I raise dogs, I have enough to pick up.

Okay, tantrum over.

Peace,
2P.


----------



## ATrueFA (Apr 21, 2007)

If I told all my stand up horror stories this thread would never end so I will only share the worst ones..
I guess the worst one was someone I met through the Dimensions printed mag via actual mail back in the late 80s. After mailing back and forth and then talking on the phone many times we decided to meet. I offered to fly out and meet her on a weekend but she told me she would rather fly out and meet me and of course I offered to buy the ticket so I bought it in her name and left it as a "will call" so she could just pick it up at the counter. I went to the airport and waited until everyone departed the flight she was supposed to be on and she wasn't there. I went to the counter and they verified she never got on the flight. After some checking they found she had gone and paid $75 to get the destination and time etc changed so she could use the ticket to go elsewhere.


Dave


----------



## Butterbelly (Apr 21, 2007)

ATrueFA said:


> If I told all my stand up horror stories this thread would never end so I will only share the worst ones..
> I guess the worst one was someone I met through the Dimensions printed mag via actual mail back in the late 80s. After mailing back and forth and then talking on the phone many times we decided to meet. I offered to fly out and meet her on a weekend but she told me she would rather fly out and meet me and of course I offered to buy the ticket so I bought it in her name and left it as a "will call" so she could just pick it up at the counter. I went to the airport and waited until everyone departed the flight she was supposed to be on and she wasn't there. I went to the counter and they verified she never got on the flight. After some checking they found she had gone and paid $75 to get the destination and time etc changed so she could use the ticket to go elsewhere.
> 
> 
> Dave




Awww, Dave, I'm so sorry to hear that happened to you. What a hateful thing to do to someone.


----------



## BothGunsBlazing (Apr 21, 2007)

I've never really stood anyone up or been stood up in the sense that something was already planned and one of us just decided to ditch on it at the last minute .. although I so often wish I had made plans and followed through with them in the first place.


----------



## Aliena (Apr 21, 2007)

ATrueFA said:


> If I told all my stand up horror stories this thread would never end so I will only share the worst ones..
> I guess the worst one was someone I met through the Dimensions printed mag via actual mail back in the late 80s. After mailing back and forth and then talking on the phone many times we decided to meet. I offered to fly out and meet her on a weekend but she told me she would rather fly out and meet me and of course I offered to buy the ticket so I bought it in her name and left it as a "will call" so she could just pick it up at the counter. I went to the airport and waited until everyone departed the flight she was supposed to be on and she wasn't there. I went to the counter and they verified she never got on the flight. After some checking they found she had gone and paid $75 to get the destination and time etc changed so she could use the ticket to go elsewhere.
> 
> 
> Dave




Now that's messed up! I am sorry Dave this happened to you, it was not right. You deserved better.


----------



## swordchick (Apr 21, 2007)

Krissy12 said:


> Oh my jeezzzus, these are horrid. My lovely stand up story:
> 
> A guy I had dated a couple of times called me and asked me to meet up with him at his apartment, where we would take his car to a resturant/movie. He said he was coming home from work, getting showered/ready and that we could meet right after. I showed up at the right time in some nice new high heel boots that sank into the grass walking up to his building, which was "just great" as it was. Of course, I get to his door and knock..No answer. I'm dressed up and ready to go out, so I start to feel like a loser. I walk back out to my car, sinking my new boots into the grass/mud combo some more, when I see him sitting watching me in some girl's car. They were laughing and trying to hide! WTF?
> 
> And that's why I went to prison for life..murder 1.


 
You would be a hero in prison.


----------



## bluewine (Apr 22, 2007)

ATrueFA said:


> I'm the undisputed king of being stood up, my record was 4 times in one month (by 4 different women) and more than 12 times in one year. At first I used to give them a second chance but I got stood up a 2nd time every single time so I stopped giving 2nd chances. It really sucks that some people would rather stand you up instead of just saying that they are not really interested, though I am sure some people also do it for sport. I don't do that to people, I was brought up to be honest with people.
> 
> Dave



On being stood up. This may sound cold, but here is what I suggest for the first meeting. Have the guy or the woman meet you on your turf, like a Star Bucks within 10 minutes of your place. If the interest level is high, they won't mind the drive and it shows they are interested.If they don't show up, you won't feel so bad.Daryl (Milwaukee)


----------



## bluewine (Apr 22, 2007)

BigCutieSasha said:


> I have in my life stood up a guy. BUT in my defense he was nothing like he said he was. He was a guy from online who had only a really old picture to share with me. So when I decided to meet him I said lets meet at the mall where there were plenty of people. I asked him what he was wearing and such so I could find him. Well my plan was to show up a tad late and look for him from afar to see if he was what he said he was. Well yeah.... he looked nothing like his picture. Same face but about a 10 year difference. He said he was 25, but he looked easily 35. He had little hair on his head and body type was nothing like he described. Now I'm really not one to hate on someone for apperance, but I was 20 years old. For all I know this was some creepy dude who WAS 35 trying to hook it up with a 20 yr old girl. I walked away and he didn't try calling me after that. So I don't think he was too upset.



I think you did the right thing, I'm a guy and I have been through the 10 to 20year old picture scam with more than 1 woman. It's not cool at all. Daryl (Milwaukee)


----------



## bluewine (Apr 22, 2007)

Aliena said:


> Now that's messed up! I am sorry Dave this happened to you, it was not right. You deserved better.



Dave, I know it's hard but try to keep everything local and never pay for anyones plan tickets you don't know. Daryl (Milwaukee)


----------



## bluewine (Apr 22, 2007)

_broshe_ said:


> Yeah, i've been stood up by people. happend twice,
> 
> fortuneatly, in one case, the girl later revealed her true colors, so it was alittle easier to get over it



I love dating and meeting fun interesting Women, I don't think I have ever been stood up, however, not to sound arogent, I only go out with women that are persuing me. Daryl (Milwaukee)


----------



## bluewine (Apr 22, 2007)

This is from a guys perspective. I think it's hard for some women to say "No". It's a good idea to set that initial meeting up with as little lead time as posible if you are concerned about being stood up. If you set up a Saturday Afternoon Meeting on a Monday, she has all week to think of ways to get out of meeting you. Daryl (Milwaukee)


----------



## AnnMarie (Apr 22, 2007)

BigCutieSasha said:


> WAS 35 trying to hook it up with a 20 yr old



DO NOT JUDGE!!!!!!!!!!!!

No, really, I don't try. Sometimes shit just happens.

:huh:


----------



## AnnMarie (Apr 22, 2007)

BothGunsBlazing said:


> I've never really stood anyone up or been stood up in the sense that something was already planned and one of us just decided to ditch on it at the last minute .. although I so often wish I had made plans and followed through with them in the first place.



Yeah. *nods*


----------



## Fuzzy (Apr 22, 2007)

Back when my sister Jen was in high school, she had been asked by a friend to double date to Prom. On the night of the Prom, she was still trying to get ready when her date, and the couple they were doubling with arrived at the house. 

After seeing how much more ready Jen needed to get, they left to gas up the car and they'd be right back. In a few minutes.

They never came back.

According to the police report, her friends were racing down a dirt road on the south end of town, attempting to jump a grade crossing. And they apparently didn't see the train.


----------



## Aliena (Apr 22, 2007)

Fuzzy said:


> Back when my sister Jen was in high school, she had been asked by a friend to double date to Prom. On the night of the Prom, she was still trying to get ready when her date, and the couple they were doubling with arrived at the house.
> 
> After seeing how much more ready Jen needed to get, they left to gas up the car and they'd be right back. In a few minutes.
> 
> ...



Ok, this is probably a super-uber dumb question, but did they live? 
This is incredibly sad.


----------



## AnnMarie (Apr 22, 2007)

Fuzzy said:


> Back when my sister Jen was in high school, she had been asked by a friend to double date to Prom. On the night of the Prom, she was still trying to get ready when her date, and the couple they were doubling with arrived at the house.
> 
> After seeing how much more ready Jen needed to get, they left to gas up the car and they'd be right back. In a few minutes.
> 
> ...



OH MY GOD!!!!!!!

Wow, I'd rather have the feeling of being stood up anytime to the feeling of "I was supposed to be in there."

Your poor sister, what a terrible memory to be tied up in a prom.


----------



## Red (Apr 22, 2007)

BigCutieSasha said:


> I've been stood up numerous times. But one time in specific stands out most to me. This one time when I was 19 I think, I was at my Moms house and I invited an online friend over who I had never met( stupid? Yes... won't ever do that again) and he was going to take me out to dinner. He showed up and I could see the look of disappointment on his face about my looks (I'm sure my size had most to do with it even though I told him I was plus size). So when it was time to leave for dinner I said let me write my mom a note to where I'm going and he said he would go warm up the car. As I was locking the doors and walking outside I noticed him driving off. He had just ditched me. Now that was a blow to the ego. So in a way I was stood up and ditched.




Fuck me...that is _so very very wrong_! I'm speechless :blink:


----------



## Paw Paw (Apr 22, 2007)

Fuzzy said:


> Back when my sister Jen was in high school, she had been asked by a friend to double date to Prom. On the night of the Prom, she was still trying to get ready when her date, and the couple they were doubling with arrived at the house.
> 
> After seeing how much more ready Jen needed to get, they left to gas up the car and they'd be right back. In a few minutes.
> 
> ...




That is a whole different thread. Damn, that is so sad.

Peace,
2P.


----------



## ClashCityRocker (Apr 22, 2007)

AnnMarie said:


> DO NOT JUDGE!!!!!!!!!!!!
> 
> No, really, I don't try. Sometimes shit just happens.
> 
> :huh:



you're the greatest.:wubu:


----------



## LillyBBBW (Apr 22, 2007)

Gosh, I've been stood up a few times but it was never to the caliber of some of the crappy stories I've heard here. I recall the few times talking to somebody online for quite a while. We get on great, etc. etc. and we decide to meet. Right before the date the guy chickens out. Says his grandma broke her hip or some other lame story. I seem to always meet these guys with social anxiety disorder and they get themselves so worked up that they can't even get out the door. I'll go, wait for about a half an hour, then get home and find an email message saying their neighbor's dog threw up and they had to take him to the vet or something. *shakes head*

I'm usually crystal clear with people as to what they are getting in advance so there are no surprises. I don't send angle shots, half a portrait, smokey lighting, etc. My photos are completely unapologetic so if the person wouldn't like me they wouldn't be hitting me up in the first place. I've had people express delight that I'm much fatter in person or dismay that I"m not as big as I appear in my photos. *shrugs* Either that or they run away into the night and leave me an email message about a dead relative they had to go see and they hope I'm not mad. Apparently I'm a scary person.


----------



## Aliena (Apr 22, 2007)

LillyBBBW said:


> Go My photos are completely unapologetic so if the person wouldn't like me they wouldn't be hitting me up in the first place. I've had people express delight that I'm much fatter in person or dismay that I"m not as big as I appear in my photos. *shrugs* Either that or they run away into the night and leave me an email message about a dead relative they had to go see and they hope I'm not mad. Apparently I'm a scary person.




Men should be fanning your face with a palm leaf, oiling your feet, and feeding you grapes. You m'lady are a goddess! And I've yet to see you take a bad photo! :happy:


----------



## Fuzzy (Apr 22, 2007)

I'm not going to go into gruesome detail. Nobody survived. No one was wearing seatbelts.

Okay, maybe a little detail. I had jumped my car there many times. Not Dukes of Hazzard amount of air, but enough to get the tires off the ground. It was a single set of tracks and usually empty, maybe a train a day. The dirt road was straight for a mile in either direction. No trees or bushes blocked the view. I still cannot fathom that they didn't see the train, other than the possibility that the driver (Jen's date) was attempting to beat the train to the crossing.


----------



## Butterbelly (Apr 22, 2007)

Fuzzy said:


> I'm not going to go into gruesome detail. Nobody survived. No one was wearing seatbelts.
> 
> Okay, maybe a little detail. I had jumped my car there many times. Not Dukes of Hazzard amount of air, but enough to get the tires off the ground. It was a single set of tracks and usually empty, maybe a train a day. The dirt road was straight for a mile in either direction. No trees or bushes blocked the view. I still cannot fathom that they didn't see the train, other than the possibility that the driver (Jen's date) was attempting to beat the train to the crossing.



How sad


----------



## Butterbelly (Apr 22, 2007)

Aliena said:


> Men should be fanning your face with a palm leaf, oiling your feet, and feeding you grapes. You m'lady are a goddess! And I've yet to see you take a bad photo! :happy:



I totally agree!!


----------



## bluewine (Apr 22, 2007)

Nobody nor no ones relative just happens to get sick the same time you have a date set up.That's a cheap way out. Notice they never schedule a follow up date. Daryl


----------



## supersoup (Apr 22, 2007)

i've never been stood up, but so help me bob...i'd flip a shit. yet another reason for me to avoid dating again FOREVER.


----------



## AnnMarie (Apr 22, 2007)

bluewine said:


> Nobody nor no ones relative just happens to get sick the same time you have a date set up.That's a cheap way out. Notice they never schedule a follow up date. Daryl



Yeah, actually they do. I'm not saying the excuses saying it are usually valid, but people have dates all the time, and people get hurt and sick all the time. It's bound to coincide eventually. 

If it happened to me, I'd at least want someone to hear me out on the chance it was real.


----------



## Aliena (Apr 22, 2007)

AnnMarie said:


> Yeah, actually they do. I'm not saying the excuses saying it are usually valid, but people have dates all the time, and people get hurt and sick all the time. It's bound to coincide eventually.
> 
> If it happened to me, I'd at least want someone to hear me out on the chance it was real.



I agree. My first date with my husband had me half way to meet him (a 3hr drive!) only to call him to tell him I'm running late and finding out he's not coming. His excuse was sickness. I still challenge that answer, but in all honesty, I am fairly certain he was indeed sick. 

It does happen; occasionally.


----------



## LillyBBBW (Apr 23, 2007)

bluewine said:


> Notice they never schedule a follow up date. Daryl



Actually they do. I get the email saying, "The gerbils got loose," then I don't hear from them for a while. Then they initiate contact again, "Hey, long time no see. Let's meet!" And me trying to be nice and understanding I cut them some slack and agree and then the whole thing starts all over again. To be honest I'd RATHER the person not call again.


----------



## LillyBBBW (Apr 23, 2007)

Aliena said:


> Men should be fanning your face with a palm leaf, oiling your feet, and feeding you grapes. You m'lady are a goddess! And I've yet to see you take a bad photo! :happy:





Butterbelly said:


> I totally agree!!



Thanks ladies!! :wubu:


----------



## tink977 (Apr 23, 2007)

I started this thread based on a guy that recently stood me up (three times), but I do have another story to share as well. When I was in college I met a guy that I instantly fell for. Over the course of our friendship, he stood me up three times. I let everytime slide off my back like nothing...ususally turning it around to make it my fault and apologizing for it myself (I was completely blinded). We knew each other for years and "dated" for seven months with contact every single day (by phone or e-mail). Then one day I left on a family vacation and when I came back...he was gone. He disconnected his phone, his e-mail, quit his job and left his apartment. I never heard a word from him again. That was in June 2002 and there isn't a day that passes that I don't think of him. I should have known and not let all of those "stand ups" go. Maybe if I had opened my eyes a little wider, I wouldn't have been so broken hearted about the whole thing. And now, when I get stood up, I think maybe I am just wishing it on myself.


----------



## LillyBBBW (Apr 23, 2007)

tink977 said:


> I started this thread based on a guy that recently stood me up (three times), but I do have another story to share as well. When I was in college I met a guy that I instantly fell for. Over the course of our friendship, he stood me up three times. I let everytime slide off my back like nothing...ususally turning it around to make it my fault and apologizing for it myself (I was completely blinded). We knew each other for years and "dated" for seven months with contact every single day (by phone or e-mail). Then one day I left on a family vacation and when I came back...he was gone. He disconnected his phone, his e-mail, quit his job and left his apartment. I never heard a word from him again. That was in June 2002 and there isn't a day that passes that I don't think of him. I should have known and not let all of those "stand ups" go. Maybe if I had opened my eyes a little wider, I wouldn't have been so broken hearted about the whole thing. And now, when I get stood up, I think maybe I am just wishing it on myself.



Wow tink! I'm sorry you had to expereince this but what a mystery. I think it's pretty clear it wasn't you and there was more going on with him that you you even realize. 

I wish I had an answer. A guy makes an appiontment to meet you or pick you up, the time comes and goes and they don't show. Unless you're standing there in a ski mask with a hatchet in your hands I think it's pretty safe not to blame yourself.


----------



## Green Eyed Fairy (Apr 23, 2007)

LillyBBBW said:


> Wow tink! I'm sorry you had to expereince this but what a mystery. I think it's pretty clear it wasn't you and there was more going on with him that you you even realize.
> 
> I wish I had an answer. A guy makes an appiontment to meet you or pick you up, the time comes and goes and they don't show. Unless you're standing there in a ski mask with a hatchet in your hands I think it's pretty safe not to blame yourself.




I totally agree, Tink- you didn't bring it on yourself. The problem lies with him- and his habits of blowing people off are going to come back and bite him, HARD, in the ass one day.


----------



## SonicDude (Nov 5, 2007)

Aliena said:


> I agree. My first date with my husband had me half way to meet him (a 3hr drive!) only to call him to tell him I'm running late and finding out he's not coming. His excuse was sickness. I still challenge that answer, but in all honesty, I am fairly certain he was indeed sick.
> 
> It does happen; occasionally.



I'm (for reasons unknown) remarkably mistrusting of people, and I think that's why I go so far out of my way to not get into situations where people would question my sincerity.

I'm pretty certain I made a girl sick once in high school because of it. I didn't want to screw things up and make her think I was ducking out with a fake illness, so I went to dinner with some random respiratory tract infection. It was the single most awkward dinner/movie ever, so it probably would've been better to stay home. Oh well.


----------



## Half Full (Nov 5, 2007)

tink977 said:


> How many of you have been stood up? I was wondering if I were the only person in the world that this happens to....yes, more than once.  Why ask someone out if you aren't going to bother showing up?
> 
> And, how many of you out there have stood someone up and why?



I've never been stood up that I can recall.

I only stood someone up once and in the end, I think he deserved it!

He was a blind date I met thru a personal ad. I was driving to meet him at Chevy's where we had arranged to meet and I witnessed a car accident right in front of me...there was a baby in the car who was not hurt but really scared and shaken up so the Mom freaked out too. It happened on a small side street so traffic was blocked for quite a while until the police could calm her down and check everything out. This was before cell phones so I couldn't call my date to tell him what was happening!

Once traffic was moving I raced to the restaurant but as I was about 45 minutes late he had already left. I felt HORRIBLE!! I called and called him when I got home but he wouldn't pick up the phone. I called his work the next day cause I knew I would get thru to him....he hung up on me the first time but I still felt so bad, I called again and quickly begged him to just listen....he let me tell him what happened and then said that I was lying and hung up on me again! :-(

I felt really bad about it but figured if he was such an inflexible jerk, who needed him anyway? I mean, why would I call and call if I simply wanted to blow him off?

Aside from an unforeseen situation like I had I would never stand someone up...I figure even if he turns out to be the elephant man he still has feelings and deserves a couple of hours of my time even if there will never be a second date.


----------

