Buffetbelly
Nosh, destroyer of snacks
Does he really like my love handles and bubble butt?"
When my dude and I are in bed, he likes to grab my love handles or squeeze my butt, saying that he loves how juicy they are. I told him that I feel fat when he points out my flaws, but he said they're cute. If he thinks my flab is so cute, why does he tell me to start going to the gym more? Does he really like my love handles and bubble butt?
Generally speaking, if a guy squeezes, it pleases ‑- end of story. But the fact that your guy keeps bugging you to hit the gym is a little disconcerting. My guess is that it's his misguided attempt to nudge you into losing weight. His crazy logic might go something like this: I'll tell her I love her curves so I don't destroy her self-esteem, but at the same time, I'll encourage her to work out more so she drops a few pounds. That way I get the message across without being the bad guy.
Another possibility is that he likes feeling your curves, but he's not sure about the look of them. According to a couple of shrinks I talked to, some men are very conflicted ‑- torn between what feels sexy to them on a tactile level and what society tells them is hot. So when he touches your butt, he gets turned on, but the brainwashing he's received from things like America's Next Top Model makes him feel like you should lose 15 pounds.
Of course, this situation may have more to do with your own insecurities. Did he make this suggestion after you complained about being out of shape? If so, that's a different story. See, men are problem solvers. Present him with a dilemma like, "Gee, I'm so flabby. How do I tone up?" and he's going to say, "Hmmm...the gym?" He thinks you're looking for advice, so he gives it, and you immediately assume he thinks you're a big, fat cow. Regardless, the bottom line is that you shouldn't let any guy dictate how much weight you need to lose. Who is he to talk anyway? I'd bet my entire video-game collection that he's probably packing a few extra enchiladas around the middle himself.
Another possibility is that he likes feeling your curves, but he's not sure about the look of them. According to a couple of shrinks I talked to, some men are very conflicted ‑- torn between what feels sexy to them on a tactile level and what society tells them is hot. So when he touches your butt, he gets turned on, but the brainwashing he's received from things like America's Next Top Model makes him feel like you should lose 15 pounds.
Of course, this situation may have more to do with your own insecurities. Did he make this suggestion after you complained about being out of shape? If so, that's a different story. See, men are problem solvers. Present him with a dilemma like, "Gee, I'm so flabby. How do I tone up?" and he's going to say, "Hmmm...the gym?" He thinks you're looking for advice, so he gives it, and you immediately assume he thinks you're a big, fat cow. Regardless, the bottom line is that you shouldn't let any guy dictate how much weight you need to lose. Who is he to talk anyway? I'd bet my entire video-game collection that he's probably packing a few extra enchiladas around the middle himself.
