A stranger had helped me get a tire aired up and in the process he asked my neice "Don't I know you from somwhere at the bowling alley two years ago". Seriously who would freaking remember that? Apparently some guy who had the hots for my neice. I found out later the stranger was a guy I went to school with and hunts with my brother. Small world eh? Except I live in a county of 18,000 people. I looked him up on fb and chatted a bit and he brought up having seen my niece at the bowling alley and how she had talked to him and his date while she and her ex husband bowled. My niece is very pretty, long blonde hair, natural big boobs etc. She also is very outgoing and friendly to people. So I get it I am sure there are lots of guys who are holding on to a fond memory of her.
My point is this. Who would really want that? I mean my teen years I longed for anyone to pay attention to me romantically or find me hot. I had those fantasies where you walk into a room and everyone buzzes "ohh who is she?"
I think to be fair a lot of women have this need to be admired and I am not poo pooing that at all. I will say after having watched my niece deal with constant unwanted attention and just people being weird about wanting to be her friend it gave me a new perspective.
I grew up resenting girls just like her and thinking of her body type as the enemy. My neice even drives a pink car, had Barbie plates the entire cliche. So along with the male attention she gets a lot of hostile female attention.
Having witnessed some of the things she has to deal with I realized that being the societal ideal comes with a lot of negative stuff too. No one is perfect and no standard of beauty is going to let you go unscathed from negative feedback.
Beauty can be the beast that causes just as much damage as being the beast that everyone wishes would be beautiful.
I have had guys tell me they would "do me" if I lost weight. In other words I wasn't fullfilling my destiny of being their sperm recepticle. My mom trying to urge me to get thin so I would be beautiful. Commericals etc. The entire world always telling me to change and become a butterfly.
In the meantime women tear each other down in an attempt to make themselves feel better or share a common enemy with their peer group. My friends and I would constantly rip on the Barbie types in our group bitch sessions. It's not something I am proud of, but I was a teen and not my most shining moment in time. None of that resentment or hate ever made me skinnier or prettier. It just made me a bitch.
What perspective have any of you had in regards to standards of beauty that have helped you on you path to self-acceptance city: Population *you* lol sorry couldn't help putting the cheese at the end. hmmm cheese.
My point is this. Who would really want that? I mean my teen years I longed for anyone to pay attention to me romantically or find me hot. I had those fantasies where you walk into a room and everyone buzzes "ohh who is she?"
I think to be fair a lot of women have this need to be admired and I am not poo pooing that at all. I will say after having watched my niece deal with constant unwanted attention and just people being weird about wanting to be her friend it gave me a new perspective.
I grew up resenting girls just like her and thinking of her body type as the enemy. My neice even drives a pink car, had Barbie plates the entire cliche. So along with the male attention she gets a lot of hostile female attention.
Having witnessed some of the things she has to deal with I realized that being the societal ideal comes with a lot of negative stuff too. No one is perfect and no standard of beauty is going to let you go unscathed from negative feedback.
Beauty can be the beast that causes just as much damage as being the beast that everyone wishes would be beautiful.
I have had guys tell me they would "do me" if I lost weight. In other words I wasn't fullfilling my destiny of being their sperm recepticle. My mom trying to urge me to get thin so I would be beautiful. Commericals etc. The entire world always telling me to change and become a butterfly.
In the meantime women tear each other down in an attempt to make themselves feel better or share a common enemy with their peer group. My friends and I would constantly rip on the Barbie types in our group bitch sessions. It's not something I am proud of, but I was a teen and not my most shining moment in time. None of that resentment or hate ever made me skinnier or prettier. It just made me a bitch.
What perspective have any of you had in regards to standards of beauty that have helped you on you path to self-acceptance city: Population *you* lol sorry couldn't help putting the cheese at the end. hmmm cheese.
