A friend got me hooked on TikTok last summer ( I don’t post, but I damn sure like to watch) and I started noticing video after video of guys saying they’re into “larger” or “plus size” women. These guys extoll the virtues of stretch marks, squishy tummies, and big booties, never specifically saying they’re FA directly. A bit of ambiguous language. And these are very conventionally attractive men, most of whom are young (20-40.) At first I thought “Hallelujah! Perhaps size acceptance is winning.”
I celebrated too quickly, however. More and more, it’s coming out that these boys are using BBW to earn followers and standing on social media. If they do actually date a fat women (usually on the smaller end of the fat spectrum, as close to the socially accepted norm as they can find*,) they still won’t do so publicly. I cannot decide what’s more disappointing, an FA who hides their preferences, or these false FA riding a trend? Either way, we’re still just objects.
*please note: I am not throwing shade at or putting down those women on the other end of the spectrum from me. We all have our preferences, but dammit, why is it so damned hard to own one’s own feelings? Apparently self awareness, like common sense, is a curse and not the blessing I believe it to be.
I celebrated too quickly, however. More and more, it’s coming out that these boys are using BBW to earn followers and standing on social media. If they do actually date a fat women (usually on the smaller end of the fat spectrum, as close to the socially accepted norm as they can find*,) they still won’t do so publicly. I cannot decide what’s more disappointing, an FA who hides their preferences, or these false FA riding a trend? Either way, we’re still just objects.
*please note: I am not throwing shade at or putting down those women on the other end of the spectrum from me. We all have our preferences, but dammit, why is it so damned hard to own one’s own feelings? Apparently self awareness, like common sense, is a curse and not the blessing I believe it to be.
