I would like to pose the question of regret to people. Or probably more accurately...contrition.
I have been a member of Dims for a while now, however don't often post. In fact, I have only been on the forums a handful of times in the last 6 months. Why? For a number of reasons, but mostly because viewing threads on the forums can sometimes bring into focus the fact that I sometimes find dimensions very isolating.
I was fortunate enough to meet a number of Dims members during the NJ Bash in April of this year. I had a fantastic time, and on the whole people were very welcoming towards me. However, now that I am back home in Australia, the memories of my time in NJ can feel bitter sweet. I know there are a few active Australian dims members here, however I havent met any personally yet (hopefully I will though). I dont have anyone here in my home town who shares my outlook on the topic of (SS)BBWS or FAs, and that can sometimes - for me - make me feel down and disheartened.
I sometimes feel as though I am in a size acceptance limbo, not quite fitting into the Dims/Size Acceptance community, whilst not quite fitting into 'regular' society either. I am not trying to imply that Dims is heterogeneous from regular society by the way.... I am merely trying to make the distinction to (hopefully) elucidate my point. It is for this reason, that I occasionally wish I hadn't come across Dimensions. Knowing a community exists that shares my thoughts and feelings towards size acceptance, but that I seem unable to fully immerse myself in that community is hard. I suppose on its most basic level, I feel like a lonely fat girl. Whilst I know that there is a bunch of people just a few internet clicks away, I cant help but feel alone.
I recognise that some might be of the opinion that it is only myself who can change my perception. I agree. I am hoping some people might be able to identify with what I'm trying to say.
Like I said, there are a few reasons why I dont come to the forums as much anymore, but those issues have been discussed elsewhere by others so I wont open up the conversation again. I suppose I am hoping to find out whether other people here have had similar feelings of contrition or discord in discovering dimensions; or indeed any conflicting experiences or feelings associated with Dims?
I'de like to finish my clarifying that I am in no way trying to criticise Dimensions. The above is just my own personal feelings, at this point in time. I don't want to, nor will I, leave Dimensions. I suppose I am just trying to search for an answer to my mixed emotions regarding the community. I support Dimensions and what the group has accomplished. Maybe I am searching for something without knowing precisely what it is I am looking for. I just want to feel less isolated and caged in my own mind.
So I'm throwing it open for comment. What are other peoples' experiences?
I have been a member of Dims for a while now, however don't often post. In fact, I have only been on the forums a handful of times in the last 6 months. Why? For a number of reasons, but mostly because viewing threads on the forums can sometimes bring into focus the fact that I sometimes find dimensions very isolating.
I was fortunate enough to meet a number of Dims members during the NJ Bash in April of this year. I had a fantastic time, and on the whole people were very welcoming towards me. However, now that I am back home in Australia, the memories of my time in NJ can feel bitter sweet. I know there are a few active Australian dims members here, however I havent met any personally yet (hopefully I will though). I dont have anyone here in my home town who shares my outlook on the topic of (SS)BBWS or FAs, and that can sometimes - for me - make me feel down and disheartened.
I sometimes feel as though I am in a size acceptance limbo, not quite fitting into the Dims/Size Acceptance community, whilst not quite fitting into 'regular' society either. I am not trying to imply that Dims is heterogeneous from regular society by the way.... I am merely trying to make the distinction to (hopefully) elucidate my point. It is for this reason, that I occasionally wish I hadn't come across Dimensions. Knowing a community exists that shares my thoughts and feelings towards size acceptance, but that I seem unable to fully immerse myself in that community is hard. I suppose on its most basic level, I feel like a lonely fat girl. Whilst I know that there is a bunch of people just a few internet clicks away, I cant help but feel alone.
I recognise that some might be of the opinion that it is only myself who can change my perception. I agree. I am hoping some people might be able to identify with what I'm trying to say.
Like I said, there are a few reasons why I dont come to the forums as much anymore, but those issues have been discussed elsewhere by others so I wont open up the conversation again. I suppose I am hoping to find out whether other people here have had similar feelings of contrition or discord in discovering dimensions; or indeed any conflicting experiences or feelings associated with Dims?
I'de like to finish my clarifying that I am in no way trying to criticise Dimensions. The above is just my own personal feelings, at this point in time. I don't want to, nor will I, leave Dimensions. I suppose I am just trying to search for an answer to my mixed emotions regarding the community. I support Dimensions and what the group has accomplished. Maybe I am searching for something without knowing precisely what it is I am looking for. I just want to feel less isolated and caged in my own mind.
So I'm throwing it open for comment. What are other peoples' experiences?
