truebebeblue
Balls,I kicks em.
I never fell into the stereotype of being the lonely fat girl.
I have dated loads and been in love. Experienced a lot,
I've had my heart broken more times than I care to admit or count.
I have always retained my sense of hopefulness. Even after my boyfriend died a while back. I thought, okay that time is done. Grieve and move on.
Lately though,I am weary. I crave that excitement of a new love interest.
I seek it out and try to feel open and hopeful but once I actually begin to
be seriously interested in a man,I start to feel myself bracing.
In my mind I think "what is his brand of disappointment?"
It usually makes itself clear in short order and I feel that telltale
'kick in the stomach' feeling. This is wearing on my optimism.
Am I going to end up a crazy cat lady???
Another interesting thing has started and this is clearly with age.
I want a child and the women in my family have early menopause (around 40)
this adds to the pressure I feel (and I am beginning to resent it!)
I am very regularly asked out by men much younger than me that will likely
want children in 5-10 years but are in no shape ready for it now.
So what is a lady of shrinking child bearing years to do?
It creates a very real issue. I'll be 33 this year BTW
Anyway I think I am half venting half rambling!
Please join me!
True
I have dated loads and been in love. Experienced a lot,
I've had my heart broken more times than I care to admit or count.
I have always retained my sense of hopefulness. Even after my boyfriend died a while back. I thought, okay that time is done. Grieve and move on.
Lately though,I am weary. I crave that excitement of a new love interest.
I seek it out and try to feel open and hopeful but once I actually begin to
be seriously interested in a man,I start to feel myself bracing.
In my mind I think "what is his brand of disappointment?"
It usually makes itself clear in short order and I feel that telltale
'kick in the stomach' feeling. This is wearing on my optimism.
Am I going to end up a crazy cat lady???
Another interesting thing has started and this is clearly with age.
I want a child and the women in my family have early menopause (around 40)
this adds to the pressure I feel (and I am beginning to resent it!)
I am very regularly asked out by men much younger than me that will likely
want children in 5-10 years but are in no shape ready for it now.
So what is a lady of shrinking child bearing years to do?
It creates a very real issue. I'll be 33 this year BTW
Anyway I think I am half venting half rambling!
Please join me!
True