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Feeling conflicted about my attraction (V. FA/FFA)

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blubrluvr

Practical Conservative
Joined
Nov 2, 2005
Messages
128
Location
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I know I'll probably be accused of being a hater or misinformed fat phobic, but here goes...

I've ALWAYS been aroused by fat women. During my adolescence I sought out images in the ads for weight loss products in "Lady's Home Journal" and other womens' magazines. When I went to the library, I'd spend hours looking through books about the Circus to see if there were images of fat ladies. To this day, I'm aroused when I see a woman who has gained weight. I married a normal size woman who I love more than anything. During her child bearing years she went up to close to 200 pounds (while pregnant) and was 180 a few years postpartum. At 5'6" tall in a size 18, she was barely a BBW. She has since lost weight and now is in the 135 pound range. Fortunately for me, she has large breasts which never cease to arouse me. We're very happily married.

But I still find huge women attractive. It's an animal attraction. Totally irrational. Yes, there may be "healthy" 400 pound folk out there, but at that weight most humans start to develop diabetes and serum cholesterol levels that can be unhealthy. When mobility begins to be compromised, the danger becomes even more manifest. Imagine not being able to flee a burning building?

Yet, I continue to be aroused. It disturbs me. The thought of seeing a 1000 pound woman naked turns me on. Yet, my rational mind says such a woman would likely be very close to death. It makes me feel like a freak. A monster.

Anyone else feel this way?
 

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