S
saucywench
Some of you may be too young to have experienced this, but I was wondering if any of you have found lost loves (or friends) after years of no contact.
My first love/best friend of my young adulthood moved out of state after remarrying. His decision devastated me and it was the first time I sought counseling--to deal with the grief of his loss. Five years later, and with a little searching (OK, I found his dad and asked) I discovered he lived in the same town that my sister lived in. When I spent two weeks babysitting my nephews, I contacted him. We talked some over the phone (it was eerily nostalgic because another friend I had who was a well-known DJ had also moved to the area, and we both had his show on in the background) and met briefly in person.
He has been gone for 29 years. From time to time I have dreams of him and I awake feeling a sense of loss. Occasionally I will run a search for him on Google. In my most recent searches I had (assuming I was correct) narrowed it down to him still living in the general metropolitan area but in a different town (still reasonably close to my sister, who had also moved). I had a phone number to go with the address and have many times considered calling, but don't want to create a disturbance (with the wife wondering who the hell that is on the phone and why is she calling).
This morning I did another Google search. I clicked on one of those 'people search' links, adding his full name, state I thought him to be in, and age. There were four returns: the third one I ruled out (wife way too young and in a state he is unlikely to be in); the fourth one was the town I thought him to live in but with no wife name beside it; the second one was also in a state I didn't expect him to be in, but it had the wife's name beside it; and...the first one had his name, his wife's name, and the town his father lived in, just about 10 miles away from me.
I got so excited, my heart just flip-flopped. I had never imagined the possibility that he could have moved back here. I tried doing a new search with the new town, but nothing came up. I found the phone directory and his name was not listed, although the 'people search' reports that there is a phone number associated with that person.
I have often wondered if his folks (divorced) were still alive. I know his father's name and can only remember his mother's last name, which could have changed over the years. I thought, surely he must have occasion to come to Arkansas from time to time...but of course he wouldn't contact me if he were traveling with family. I even remember the street where his dad lived, and wonder if perhaps he's living in his house (but only, I guess, if his stepmom had died as well). Perhaps he moved back to help care for his dad...or mom.
I'm excited to have this information. Perhaps it's not him at all, but what are the chances? Same name, correct age, same name of wife (last I knew...).
I would just like to be able to talk with him again...not to stir up trouble, but...it would just be comforting to know that he's out there, and he's close. I don't necessarily need to be back in his life, especially if that would create a problem, but...far too often this seems to happen. You develop a bond with someone and then lose contact. I also have a female friend from college that I have been trying to find.
Have any of you experienced this? If so, how did you deal with it? I'm thinking that I might go ahead and pay for a more extensive search, just to find out if it's really my friend from the past and if he really lives here again.
My first love/best friend of my young adulthood moved out of state after remarrying. His decision devastated me and it was the first time I sought counseling--to deal with the grief of his loss. Five years later, and with a little searching (OK, I found his dad and asked) I discovered he lived in the same town that my sister lived in. When I spent two weeks babysitting my nephews, I contacted him. We talked some over the phone (it was eerily nostalgic because another friend I had who was a well-known DJ had also moved to the area, and we both had his show on in the background) and met briefly in person.
He has been gone for 29 years. From time to time I have dreams of him and I awake feeling a sense of loss. Occasionally I will run a search for him on Google. In my most recent searches I had (assuming I was correct) narrowed it down to him still living in the general metropolitan area but in a different town (still reasonably close to my sister, who had also moved). I had a phone number to go with the address and have many times considered calling, but don't want to create a disturbance (with the wife wondering who the hell that is on the phone and why is she calling).
This morning I did another Google search. I clicked on one of those 'people search' links, adding his full name, state I thought him to be in, and age. There were four returns: the third one I ruled out (wife way too young and in a state he is unlikely to be in); the fourth one was the town I thought him to live in but with no wife name beside it; the second one was also in a state I didn't expect him to be in, but it had the wife's name beside it; and...the first one had his name, his wife's name, and the town his father lived in, just about 10 miles away from me.
I got so excited, my heart just flip-flopped. I had never imagined the possibility that he could have moved back here. I tried doing a new search with the new town, but nothing came up. I found the phone directory and his name was not listed, although the 'people search' reports that there is a phone number associated with that person.
I have often wondered if his folks (divorced) were still alive. I know his father's name and can only remember his mother's last name, which could have changed over the years. I thought, surely he must have occasion to come to Arkansas from time to time...but of course he wouldn't contact me if he were traveling with family. I even remember the street where his dad lived, and wonder if perhaps he's living in his house (but only, I guess, if his stepmom had died as well). Perhaps he moved back to help care for his dad...or mom.
I'm excited to have this information. Perhaps it's not him at all, but what are the chances? Same name, correct age, same name of wife (last I knew...).
I would just like to be able to talk with him again...not to stir up trouble, but...it would just be comforting to know that he's out there, and he's close. I don't necessarily need to be back in his life, especially if that would create a problem, but...far too often this seems to happen. You develop a bond with someone and then lose contact. I also have a female friend from college that I have been trying to find.
Have any of you experienced this? If so, how did you deal with it? I'm thinking that I might go ahead and pay for a more extensive search, just to find out if it's really my friend from the past and if he really lives here again.
