BigElectricKat
The Big Kat
Something happened to me on the train this past Friday and I'm not sure if I handled it correctly.
I get on the train right here where I work (takes me a minute to get to my desk after getting off the train). The platform where I get on is basically in the middle of our medical complex that is co-located with a university school of medicine. Of course, there are dozens of people who work for the hospital or the school that get on when I do to go home each day.
One gal is a very tall (I'm guessing 6'3") BBW who has such a youthful face with freckles (I LOVE freckles) and a smooth, sorta deep voice that reminds me of warm honey. Anyway, a few of us are regular riders and usually stand near the door when the train is full and sometimes when weird things go on during the train ride we talk about it or other things. So, I've learned that she used to live in Florida and that she works for the university. Normally, she is happy and smiling. But Friday was different.
On Friday, she didn't seem right and kept her head down mostly and didn't chime in when one of the other regulars made a comment about a rather aggressive panhandler that came through the car at an early stop.
At the next stop, I took the opportunity to move closer to her as more people boarded the train. I whispered, "Is everything alright", to which she replied "No". She looked so sad as tears welled up within her brown eyes. She said that there was this guy she has a crush on that works down the hall from her. Every day she stops by and talks to her friend who sits across from this guy and sometimes he'll talk to them both. But that day as she was coming up the hall she overheard him tell the other gal "She's too big" and it crushed her spirit. She was lamenting her size and felt if she were thinner, she'd have a chance with him. She said that she wanted to lose weight and was thinking of looking into WLS.
I told her to think long and hard about something like that. Does she want to possibly date a guy for whom she has to be a certain size, shape, or way. Or should she hold out for someone who accepts her the was she is, no matter what that may be. I said, if you'd already been thinking about WLS and this is a catalyst to move you forward, then by all means do what you feel is best for you. She thanked me for listening to her and got off at her stop. This isn't the bad part though.
After the young lady got off, a woman who was sitting a couple seats away started to admonish me for what I said! She told me that I should have pushed her to accept her body as it is. That all bodies are beautiful and that being thin is not the end-all-be-all for every woman. I thought to myself, "Who asked you?" But I just nodded and moved to another section of the car. The fighter in me wanted to let loose with both barrels but the gentleman in me kept my verbal six-guns in their holsters.
Was I wrong to basically tell this young lady to do what she wants to but for the right reasons? Or should I have jumped on my body positive soapbox?
I get on the train right here where I work (takes me a minute to get to my desk after getting off the train). The platform where I get on is basically in the middle of our medical complex that is co-located with a university school of medicine. Of course, there are dozens of people who work for the hospital or the school that get on when I do to go home each day.
One gal is a very tall (I'm guessing 6'3") BBW who has such a youthful face with freckles (I LOVE freckles) and a smooth, sorta deep voice that reminds me of warm honey. Anyway, a few of us are regular riders and usually stand near the door when the train is full and sometimes when weird things go on during the train ride we talk about it or other things. So, I've learned that she used to live in Florida and that she works for the university. Normally, she is happy and smiling. But Friday was different.
On Friday, she didn't seem right and kept her head down mostly and didn't chime in when one of the other regulars made a comment about a rather aggressive panhandler that came through the car at an early stop.
At the next stop, I took the opportunity to move closer to her as more people boarded the train. I whispered, "Is everything alright", to which she replied "No". She looked so sad as tears welled up within her brown eyes. She said that there was this guy she has a crush on that works down the hall from her. Every day she stops by and talks to her friend who sits across from this guy and sometimes he'll talk to them both. But that day as she was coming up the hall she overheard him tell the other gal "She's too big" and it crushed her spirit. She was lamenting her size and felt if she were thinner, she'd have a chance with him. She said that she wanted to lose weight and was thinking of looking into WLS.
I told her to think long and hard about something like that. Does she want to possibly date a guy for whom she has to be a certain size, shape, or way. Or should she hold out for someone who accepts her the was she is, no matter what that may be. I said, if you'd already been thinking about WLS and this is a catalyst to move you forward, then by all means do what you feel is best for you. She thanked me for listening to her and got off at her stop. This isn't the bad part though.
After the young lady got off, a woman who was sitting a couple seats away started to admonish me for what I said! She told me that I should have pushed her to accept her body as it is. That all bodies are beautiful and that being thin is not the end-all-be-all for every woman. I thought to myself, "Who asked you?" But I just nodded and moved to another section of the car. The fighter in me wanted to let loose with both barrels but the gentleman in me kept my verbal six-guns in their holsters.
Was I wrong to basically tell this young lady to do what she wants to but for the right reasons? Or should I have jumped on my body positive soapbox?
