TheSadeianLinguist
Coin-Operated
Most of my life, I've always had a knee-jerk reaction when people tell me I'm attractive. I tend to assume they're lying or want something from me. It's an ugly way of thinking, but it's the truth. This isn't a plea for thousands of posters to tell me I'm pretty. I have good days where I think I'm attractive, smart, and wonderful, but it usually crashes down when a guy, especially if he's romantically interested, says anything along the lines of me being beautiful. I get nervous and just want to stick my head under a rock. I can say thank you, which is a huge change from a few years ago, but it's still incredibly painful.
The thing is, I don't think this is an eating disorder thing; I often suspect it's just a woman thing. It's difficult for me to bring up with people to find out in real life. And the thing is, it wouldn't matter if I lost or gained weight. Am I seriously alone in this? I wish I could feel good about my physical appearance 90% of the time, but mostly I just have to banish my feelings about it and move on. Now that I jumped back in the dating pool in the past year, I'm wondering how to deal. What do you terrific women do?
The thing is, I don't think this is an eating disorder thing; I often suspect it's just a woman thing. It's difficult for me to bring up with people to find out in real life. And the thing is, it wouldn't matter if I lost or gained weight. Am I seriously alone in this? I wish I could feel good about my physical appearance 90% of the time, but mostly I just have to banish my feelings about it and move on. Now that I jumped back in the dating pool in the past year, I'm wondering how to deal. What do you terrific women do?
