Hilarious Halloween Story: from The Mammoth Book of Humor
A married couple were invited to a masked Hallowe'en party. They were eagerly looking forward to itut at the last minute the wife cried off with a headache. However she didn't want to spoil her husband's fun and insisted that he went on his own. So he set off for the party in full costume.
After lying on the bed for an hour, the wife began to feel better and decided and decided that she was well enough to go to the party after all. When she arrived, the party was in full swing. She quickly spotted her husband but chose to keep her presence a secret from him, something she was able to do since he had no idea what her costume was. Instead she preferred to observe him, to see how he behaved when he thought that she wasn't around. She watched from afar as he flirted, kissed and danced wih other women and then figured it was time to make a move on him herself, still without revealing her idientity.
Disguising her voice, she sidled up to him and said: "Fancy a breath of fresh air." "Sure," he replied. "I know the very place."
And with that, he led her to his car where they had sex on the back seat.
Both returned to the party but shortly before unmasking at midnight, she slipped home alone, removed her costume and went to bed. Waiting for her husband to come home, she wondered how he would manage to explain his behaviour at the party.
"How was it?" she asked when he finally arrived.
"Oh, you know I never have a good time when you're not there, darling."
"Did you dance?"
"No, not one dance. In fact, when I got there, I met a few mates and we went to the den and played poker all evening."
"Oh, yeah?" said the wife.
"But I tell you," he continued. "The guy I loaned my costume to sure had a good time!"
Humorous Quotes: The Mammoth Book of Humor
I bought all those Jane Fonda videos. I love to sit and eat cookies and watch them. --- Dolly Parton
Most rock journalism is people who can't write interviewing people who can't talk for people who can't read. ---Frank Zappa
Jazz is not dead. It just smells funny. --- Frank Zappa
A pessimist is one who, when he has the choice of two evils, chooses both --Oscar Wilde
Anything you have to acquire a taste for was not meant to be eaten. --Eddie Murphy
To apologise is to lay the foundation for a future offence. -- Ambrose Bierce
In any world menu, Canada must be considered the vichysoisse of nations--it's cold, half-French, and difficult to stir ---- Stuart Keate
TV is a medium, because it is neither rare nor well-done. --Ernie Kovacs
TV is an invention that permits you to be entertained in your living room by people you wouldn't have in your home. ---- Sir David Frost
Whenever I feel like exercise, I lie down until the feeling passes. -Robert Hutchins
silly yo mama jokes: from The Mammoth Book of Humor
Yo mama is so ugly that on Halloween people go as her.
Yo mama is so ugly that for Halloween she tricks or treats over the phone
A married couple were invited to a masked Hallowe'en party. They were eagerly looking forward to itut at the last minute the wife cried off with a headache. However she didn't want to spoil her husband's fun and insisted that he went on his own. So he set off for the party in full costume.
After lying on the bed for an hour, the wife began to feel better and decided and decided that she was well enough to go to the party after all. When she arrived, the party was in full swing. She quickly spotted her husband but chose to keep her presence a secret from him, something she was able to do since he had no idea what her costume was. Instead she preferred to observe him, to see how he behaved when he thought that she wasn't around. She watched from afar as he flirted, kissed and danced wih other women and then figured it was time to make a move on him herself, still without revealing her idientity.
Disguising her voice, she sidled up to him and said: "Fancy a breath of fresh air." "Sure," he replied. "I know the very place."
And with that, he led her to his car where they had sex on the back seat.
Both returned to the party but shortly before unmasking at midnight, she slipped home alone, removed her costume and went to bed. Waiting for her husband to come home, she wondered how he would manage to explain his behaviour at the party.
"How was it?" she asked when he finally arrived.
"Oh, you know I never have a good time when you're not there, darling."
"Did you dance?"
"No, not one dance. In fact, when I got there, I met a few mates and we went to the den and played poker all evening."
"Oh, yeah?" said the wife.
"But I tell you," he continued. "The guy I loaned my costume to sure had a good time!"
Humorous Quotes: The Mammoth Book of Humor
I bought all those Jane Fonda videos. I love to sit and eat cookies and watch them. --- Dolly Parton
Most rock journalism is people who can't write interviewing people who can't talk for people who can't read. ---Frank Zappa
Jazz is not dead. It just smells funny. --- Frank Zappa
A pessimist is one who, when he has the choice of two evils, chooses both --Oscar Wilde
Anything you have to acquire a taste for was not meant to be eaten. --Eddie Murphy
To apologise is to lay the foundation for a future offence. -- Ambrose Bierce
In any world menu, Canada must be considered the vichysoisse of nations--it's cold, half-French, and difficult to stir ---- Stuart Keate
TV is a medium, because it is neither rare nor well-done. --Ernie Kovacs
TV is an invention that permits you to be entertained in your living room by people you wouldn't have in your home. ---- Sir David Frost
Whenever I feel like exercise, I lie down until the feeling passes. -Robert Hutchins
silly yo mama jokes: from The Mammoth Book of Humor
Yo mama is so ugly that on Halloween people go as her.
Yo mama is so ugly that for Halloween she tricks or treats over the phone
