BeautifulPoeticDisaster
Well-Known Member
So today...Mike has gone to the States for work....without me. How did I become the girl that cries over silly things only girls in movies cry over? What has this guy done to me?!
I am a chronic worrier. Esp when it comes to things I have no control over...ie plane crashes. I am terrified of something happening and being stuck in this country that still feels mostly foreign to me.
Mike is my whole world...and it brings tears to my eyes to even think for a moment what it would be like without him. I never thought I would be this girl. I used to love being alone....I'm a loner type after all. And Mike being a guy does drive me up the wall sometimes. He talks non-stop most of the time, lol, and I have to tell him to wash his hands...and in general he is a guy, lol....but I miss those things right now. Even the most of annoying gross habits he has, I would be able to over look if he were here.
I know this post is going to make some of you throw up in your mouth a little, lol. Sorry. 3 days ago I was rubbing it in his face that I got the whole bed to myself and I could have peace and quite for once. Then 2 days ago I got really sad. I couldn't care less that he is going to the US, lol, I got my fix.....I just worry too much that something could happen....and today is the last day I get to see him.
It's an anxiety that actually hurts in my chest and makes me forget to breathe. We've been together nearly 2 years now....and I love him more now that I ever did when we were dating.
However, during out LDR, it didn't feel like this....when he left I was happy to return to MY life, which was pretty much as a single girl would live. I don't have that foundation any more.
This post is pathetic, I realise this....but I need hugs and for people to tell me it is going to be ok. This is the longest we will have gone without seeing each other since I've been here.
I hate being one of those worst case scenario worriers...makes me look like a mad cow, but the emotions are real...even if they aren't all that rational.
Chloe is going to get more cuddles this week than she will know what to do with.
I am a chronic worrier. Esp when it comes to things I have no control over...ie plane crashes. I am terrified of something happening and being stuck in this country that still feels mostly foreign to me.
Mike is my whole world...and it brings tears to my eyes to even think for a moment what it would be like without him. I never thought I would be this girl. I used to love being alone....I'm a loner type after all. And Mike being a guy does drive me up the wall sometimes. He talks non-stop most of the time, lol, and I have to tell him to wash his hands...and in general he is a guy, lol....but I miss those things right now. Even the most of annoying gross habits he has, I would be able to over look if he were here.
I know this post is going to make some of you throw up in your mouth a little, lol. Sorry. 3 days ago I was rubbing it in his face that I got the whole bed to myself and I could have peace and quite for once. Then 2 days ago I got really sad. I couldn't care less that he is going to the US, lol, I got my fix.....I just worry too much that something could happen....and today is the last day I get to see him.
It's an anxiety that actually hurts in my chest and makes me forget to breathe. We've been together nearly 2 years now....and I love him more now that I ever did when we were dating.
However, during out LDR, it didn't feel like this....when he left I was happy to return to MY life, which was pretty much as a single girl would live. I don't have that foundation any more.
This post is pathetic, I realise this....but I need hugs and for people to tell me it is going to be ok. This is the longest we will have gone without seeing each other since I've been here.
I hate being one of those worst case scenario worriers...makes me look like a mad cow, but the emotions are real...even if they aren't all that rational.
Chloe is going to get more cuddles this week than she will know what to do with.
