Ok...in the spirit of my old thread about meeting an FA.....
There is this guy that I am interested in...really interested in. We have been talking for almost a year. He's intelligent and funny and I adore him. I am three inches taller than him and double his weight. He IS NOT an FA. I have never made any secret about my size with him. Its part of who I am and it comes from me naturally and he has seen tons of pictures of me. When we first started talking, he would flirt with me. There was a sexual spark there. Then he stopped....and I of course, attributed this to his realization of my size and that he was not attracted to me. I also stopped trying to overtly flirt with him. In conversations(not romantic ones or even pertaining to us as a couple) he mentioned he'd never dated a big girl and went so far as to say he wasn't attracted to them. Ouch! But we continued to talk and become very close. I know he really really likes me. Never a day goes by that he doesn't call me. But in the back of my mind, I worry about that level of attraction.
Now, here's my problem.....I'm going to meet him for the very first time next month and I am nervous as hell. Pictures tell a thousand words but is he prepared for my real size? How is it going to feel for him(and me) to look at each other face-to-face? I am a tough girl and I have never been so freaked out!!! So though we connect on every level, this physical thing is making me crazy! I am trying so hard to keep my insecurities at bay. And just go to this meeting with confidence and a smile. You know.... a this is me and I'm hot attitude!! But...wow....its hard.
I am just so worried that after all this time and investing so much of my heart, that I am going to see his face for the very first time and see that look of disappointment. That quickly passing look of shock before he covers it up with a fake smile. Then I'll know he's tolerating my body just because he really likes me.
You guys are so wonderful here.....and you have helped me become a happy, sexy fat person on the inside as well as the outside. Your opinions mean alot to me....what do ya'll think? Am I setting myself up for a disaster?
There is this guy that I am interested in...really interested in. We have been talking for almost a year. He's intelligent and funny and I adore him. I am three inches taller than him and double his weight. He IS NOT an FA. I have never made any secret about my size with him. Its part of who I am and it comes from me naturally and he has seen tons of pictures of me. When we first started talking, he would flirt with me. There was a sexual spark there. Then he stopped....and I of course, attributed this to his realization of my size and that he was not attracted to me. I also stopped trying to overtly flirt with him. In conversations(not romantic ones or even pertaining to us as a couple) he mentioned he'd never dated a big girl and went so far as to say he wasn't attracted to them. Ouch! But we continued to talk and become very close. I know he really really likes me. Never a day goes by that he doesn't call me. But in the back of my mind, I worry about that level of attraction.
Now, here's my problem.....I'm going to meet him for the very first time next month and I am nervous as hell. Pictures tell a thousand words but is he prepared for my real size? How is it going to feel for him(and me) to look at each other face-to-face? I am a tough girl and I have never been so freaked out!!! So though we connect on every level, this physical thing is making me crazy! I am trying so hard to keep my insecurities at bay. And just go to this meeting with confidence and a smile. You know.... a this is me and I'm hot attitude!! But...wow....its hard.
I am just so worried that after all this time and investing so much of my heart, that I am going to see his face for the very first time and see that look of disappointment. That quickly passing look of shock before he covers it up with a fake smile. Then I'll know he's tolerating my body just because he really likes me.
You guys are so wonderful here.....and you have helped me become a happy, sexy fat person on the inside as well as the outside. Your opinions mean alot to me....what do ya'll think? Am I setting myself up for a disaster?
