Violet_Beauregard
Well-Known Member
We were discussing in the Clubhouse a topic that is rather interesting. As a woman, it seems I've gone from relationship to relationship and I just can't seem to find "the one". It made me think a lot recently... "am I meant to really have a long-term relationship?" Is everyone truly relationship material?
I am an exceptionally independent woman. I've lived on my own since I was 21 years old. I've worked for my employer for 23 years, and as a result, I have never asked my parents for help financially...I've always supported myself. I've always been the one that people come to for help. Now, at nearly 44 years old, I'm falling into the position of caretaker to my aging parents. They're still quite independent themselves, but I see them relying on me more and more for things. I have two older brothers who can barely take care of themselves, let alone my parents. I have a 13-year old nephew who lives with his mother...in a rather less than desireable home situation, so I find myself taking care of him as well. My point here is, I've always been the strong one...the one everyone else leans on. Now, I have no problem with the role. I help everyone I can, to the best of my ability. I get great satisfaction in helping others. BUT......
When is it going to be MY turn?? When is someone going to be there for me? Hence the discussion of a relationship. In most relationships, each partner is there to help and support the other. WELL, I haven't had that priviledge, as yet, and I wonder if I ever will. Does my independence and strength keep me from finding the perfect relationship for me?? Do men shy away from independent women? I've been told by friends, family and co-workers that I'm pushy, bossy, brassy, mouthy and intimidating. Well, yeah, I probably am...when the situation warrants it, but I don't think it's a regular 24/7 thing. When I know what I want, I go after it. BUT, is that pushing men out of my life? OR, am I just not relationship material?
Who else has this problem? Is it us? Or are we just not relationship material? Men - speak up here... I really want to know what you think. Is a strong, independent woman really such a bad thing?? Are we just not finding the right men? Do we really need to "rein it in"?? Are you attracted to strong, independent women, and then you find out that you really aren't? What are we doing wrong? Ladies... am I the only one who is struggling here? Are we that terrible?? Who wants to join the convent with me?? (yes, it seems that bad at times..LOL)
I'd love to hear everyone's thoughts.....
I am an exceptionally independent woman. I've lived on my own since I was 21 years old. I've worked for my employer for 23 years, and as a result, I have never asked my parents for help financially...I've always supported myself. I've always been the one that people come to for help. Now, at nearly 44 years old, I'm falling into the position of caretaker to my aging parents. They're still quite independent themselves, but I see them relying on me more and more for things. I have two older brothers who can barely take care of themselves, let alone my parents. I have a 13-year old nephew who lives with his mother...in a rather less than desireable home situation, so I find myself taking care of him as well. My point here is, I've always been the strong one...the one everyone else leans on. Now, I have no problem with the role. I help everyone I can, to the best of my ability. I get great satisfaction in helping others. BUT......
When is it going to be MY turn?? When is someone going to be there for me? Hence the discussion of a relationship. In most relationships, each partner is there to help and support the other. WELL, I haven't had that priviledge, as yet, and I wonder if I ever will. Does my independence and strength keep me from finding the perfect relationship for me?? Do men shy away from independent women? I've been told by friends, family and co-workers that I'm pushy, bossy, brassy, mouthy and intimidating. Well, yeah, I probably am...when the situation warrants it, but I don't think it's a regular 24/7 thing. When I know what I want, I go after it. BUT, is that pushing men out of my life? OR, am I just not relationship material?
Who else has this problem? Is it us? Or are we just not relationship material? Men - speak up here... I really want to know what you think. Is a strong, independent woman really such a bad thing?? Are we just not finding the right men? Do we really need to "rein it in"?? Are you attracted to strong, independent women, and then you find out that you really aren't? What are we doing wrong? Ladies... am I the only one who is struggling here? Are we that terrible?? Who wants to join the convent with me?? (yes, it seems that bad at times..LOL)
I'd love to hear everyone's thoughts.....
