Lilah
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I was in Taste of China, waiting on Lilah to show up. I was pretty nervous, mildly terrified, this could go horrendously badly, or it could go moderately badly, either way, I wasn't sure I wanted to be there. Only I didn't really have a choice.
I remember the first time I met Lilah; it was at Freshman orientation. I didn't pay much attention to her right away, I don't think she wanted anybody to notice her. They had us all gathered in a small room on the second floor of the union.
I wanna say they were talking about the code of ethics on campus, or something, I don't know, I was more distracted by the girl doing the presentation. Now that chick, I did not mind looking at for a while! Skinny enough, with tits big and firm enough to give even an ass man like me pause, and all this plus a pretty face. Just a good looking, stereotypical, hot chick is how I remember her, make-up caked on, the whole package. Eye candy for sure, and so sweet! Listening to her going on with that heavy Texan drawl, up there in her close-fitting-but-not-so-much-as-to-give-it-all-away dress, it was enough to give a guy diabetes.
Then, a phone went off.
'My baby loves me, I'm so happy, happy makes me, a modern girl-'
I turned my head to the side to see the offending phone. The girl who owned it didn't seem particularly rushed to stop the disturbance, letting the line finish before pressing a few buttons with an embarrassed, blushing, weirdly innocent smile that struck an interesting contrast with the silver nose ring and violently blue neon streaks of hair framing her smooth, angular face. She muttered an apology, and the program went on as planned, only I was paying even less attention to the speaker than ever.
This was Lilah.
I talked to her after that program was over, struck up a conversation about her ringtone, the look she had going on, and we just kinda hit it off. We hung out the rest of the day, getting pushed around from one meeting to the next, talking while we walked, while we ate. Still remember the way she kept having to pull up her shorts while she walked, wrinkling her cute, little, porcelain face in frustration every time she did it. She was thin back then, almost too skinny for my tastes, with her grey shorts, black tank hanging loosely from her lack of curves.
Which brings us to today, as a matter of fact, because skinny, she is not. Not anymore. She's changed her look since then. Like, she grew her hair out, got a few more piercings, had a simple, but beautiful tat sleeve done, and, uh, put on about fifty pounds. Some of it was over a long stretch of time, about twenty pounds at first, enough to take her from skeleton to a curvy, normal-sized, healthy woman. Then, out of nowhere, she just ballooned.
Which is why I originally set up this specific meeting.
As you've probably guessed by now, we were dating. It was still a new relationship, too, only about two months old, so far as actual courtship goes, and this is when her fattening really picked up. So you can understand how much I was freaking out about what I was about to say, I mean, it's hard to tell anyone they're getting fat, and I'm fairly sure men have died in similar circumstances, but I couldn't not say anything. For a lot of reasons, but bottom line, this was legitimately me being worried about her, as both a friend and a lover.
She came in through the door moving quickly, as she always was, smiling big, wearing a tight black dress that I would hold as evidence that just because black is a slimming color doesn't mean you can't look fat as hell when you wear it. From the chest up, she was thin and beautiful, but moving a bit south, just below the boob line, things widened out pretty dramatically. She waved at me, and headed straight for me, not actually stopping to say much, just pausing just long enough to plant a peck on my cheek and excuse herself, words pouring out in the space of one quick breath, Be right back, babe; we're getting the buffet, yeah? I'll get myself some food!
I kind of sat there for a few seconds, flapping my jaw like a fish out of water, trying to figure out how exactly I tell her this without being horribly murdered and disposed of neatly in a box by the reservoir. I looked over my shoulder to see where she was. She was leaning over the desserts table, reaching her short arms as far as she could to reach the donut holes at the back of the display, and it was not a flattering pose to be in. The bottom two inches of her fat bum were clearly visible, slightly dimpled, flabby, and hanging down beneath the bottom hem of that poor, black dress. She came back with a handful of fried, sugary dough balls, and piled them onto her already overloaded dessert plate with one hand, using the other to cover her indecency. She gathered all her plates and walked towards me like a waiter, plates up and down both arms, enough food for a family of four, and all this, just for her greedy, growing gut.
This discussion had to be had.
I smiled when she laid all the food on the table, hoping, Aww! You got me food, too!
She snorted, shot me a condescending smirk, mimicking my intonation, Aww! No, I didn't!
I looked out at what all she'd gotten for herself, and that took me a second. Even if I'd wanted to get a plate, I wouldn't have had anywhere to put it, that's how much my girlfriend was planning to eat, You didn't? I asked, slightly terrified but pushing on anyway, All this is for you alone?
Her mouth was already full of chocolate pudding, but after a second, she swallowed and answered me, with a shrug, Yeah. Missed breakfast this morning. I said nothing, but the fact is, breakfast or not, I ate dinner with her the night before, and I'm not even exaggerating when I say she should technically still be uncomfortably full from that gorge. She kept going, apparently oblivious to both the concern on my face and visibly straining seams of her dress, Might need to get seconds, too. You know me! She popped a forkful of sweet and sour pork into her mouth and smiled, happily.
I laughed nervously, Ha, yeah... I looked her over. The table blocked my view of her problem areas, but you could tell, she was definitely getting into the early stages of chubby from the waist up. Like, her ass had hit critical mass, and her bottom-heavy genetics were being overwhelmed by the sheer intake of calories Lilah was maintaining, so the fatness was filling out elsewhere. Should you, though? I asked nervously, trailing off a little at the end.
Hmmph? Lilah asked through a mouthful of roast pork.
I took a deep breath, Get seconds? Do you really need all of this, either? I mean, you've got two whole plates of just desserts here, and... I stopped when I noticed she'd stopped shovelling food down her throat. She was staring at me now. W-what?
You wanna do this?
I, uh, maybe? I stammered, What is it, uh, do what, exactly?
Talk about how... she paused, and it looked like she was trying to remember an exact phrasing, Yeah, how I 'eat like a starving bear on appetite enhancers, sit on my fat ass 24-7, and watch passively as my ass blows up like a fucking party balloon.'
I was so confused, I... Jus- what?
She took a deep breath, her jaw was tight, and she seemed to be struggling to keep herself under control, Let me get a clear grip on this. You brought me to a chinese buffet, let me get my food, and now you're going to tell me how... her breathing sped up, and I could swear, I saw some tears starting to form in the edges of her eyes, How I'm a disgusting fatassed whore who needs some serious fucking weight watchers and a personal trainer and how, unless I get my goddamn gluttony under some serious control, I'm gonna end up a lonely little whale whose only friends are fucking Ben and Jerry? I wasn't sure if she was about to stand up and storm out, or break down into hysterical tears, it could go either way, that's the kind of emotional rollercoaster I could feel moving around me. She did neither. She just sat there, staring at me, waiting for my response.
Which was pretty terrible, Wha- no! I leaned in closer, I mean, yes, but no!
She sighed heavily and looked off, not to anywhere specific, just away from me, Hmmph. she grunted, Explain.
I mean, you've gained weight, yes, but it's not that much! I lied through my teeth.
She knew I was full of shit, of course, rolling her eyes, Yeah, thirty pounds in two months, but whatever, it's spread out over fucking five foot two inches, yes, my towering height hides my minor gain.
Okay, so it's a lot, but it looks good on you! Was my next attempt to smooth things over.
Oh yeah, because this, she gestured to the soft looking belly hanging over her thighs, pooching out in front of her more than a little, Is the epitome of fucking sex appeal! Pregnant piggies, that's the future of the porn industry!
Why are you being like this? I finally asked.
You're the one who brought me to a fucking restaurant to tell me I eat too damn much.
I kind of lost my cool then, No, I fucking didn't!" I shouted, "This was your idea, Li! I said your apartment, you demanded Chinese! Some faces turned to look at us, and I pulled myself together, calmed my tone. This was supposed to be me being concerned, not me telling her how to live, Look. Lilah. I don't know what you think this is, but I am not breaking up with you. I fucking love you, you understand? You're fucking beautiful, and I'm just... I'm worried about you.
Lilah kind of slumped in her chair, and then she finally looked me in the face again, apologizing, I'm sorry... she wiped her face with a napkin, That just... brought back some memories...
You don't have to talk about it.
She looked up, smiling weakly, Thanks... She picked up a chicken leg and ripped off a hunk of meat, smiling slyly, So... you love me, then?
