Ninja Glutton
Film and Music Geek
Gah, I had a great weekend, but I still can't help but feel alone. I spent the entire weekend surrounded by friends and people at the bars up at penn state. It was a great time, but I found myself much more aware of my size than is normally apparent. It seemed like everywhere I went, I was greeted with strange stares and disgusted looks. I feel like myself, but people sometimes look at me like I don't belong. Especially when I'm the only fat guy in the joint, it seems like I'm an outsider. It's like there's this worldwide club for attractive people and I'm just not invited. And if I try to intrude and be nice and friendly and jovial, people just look at me like a slob.
I'm a clean guy, I wear nice clothes, and I consider myself confident. I can walk up and talk to pretty much anyone, but I just don't have luck in the romance department. Girls just don't seem ready or willing to look past my physical shortcomings to see that there's a lovely person underneath. I don't hate myself, but sometimes I wish I could just shrinkwrap my entire body. It seems like there's a wall between me and women. Even girls that rub my belly and show some sort of interest claim that we're just friends if I try to take it any further.
It seems like the only thing missing in my life is some kind of emotional closeness. I'm a very affectionate, romantic guy, and I just feel like that part of me is wasting away.
Sorry to be all angsty, but I just needed to vent.
I'm a clean guy, I wear nice clothes, and I consider myself confident. I can walk up and talk to pretty much anyone, but I just don't have luck in the romance department. Girls just don't seem ready or willing to look past my physical shortcomings to see that there's a lovely person underneath. I don't hate myself, but sometimes I wish I could just shrinkwrap my entire body. It seems like there's a wall between me and women. Even girls that rub my belly and show some sort of interest claim that we're just friends if I try to take it any further.
It seems like the only thing missing in my life is some kind of emotional closeness. I'm a very affectionate, romantic guy, and I just feel like that part of me is wasting away.
Sorry to be all angsty, but I just needed to vent.
