My grandparents are in visiting us from Florida. My grandfather, who was born and raised in East Tennessee (where we are now) is very racist. But, not your typical redneck, flying the confederate flag racist. He's very educated, owned several businesses before retirement, and is an overall intelligent man. However, his views on other races has yet to catch up with the large majority and everyone in the family is well aware.
He's the type of grandfather that is very sweet, but can make you cry with just a look. He's very stern, very strict, and is ALWAYS right. He could say that the sky is green and everyone in our family agrees with him because they're don't want to start an argument. He's a bully, he's that relative that you're afraid of as a kid, and even as an adult.
He has made racist comments for years, and while my family isn't exactly fighting beside Dr. King and probably tells a racist joke here and there, we are not racists and think it's appalling to judge someone based on their race. It makes everyone uncomfortable when he says these things, but because he's grandpa (like I mentioned earlier), no one says a word.
Tonight, my mother, my grandfather, and me were watching the news together. Tiger Woods was being shown and my grandpa says, "I don't watch much TV with black people on it. They're all very lazy."
And finally, with butterflies in my stomach (or more like flying saucers), I said, "Grandpa, you shouldn't say that. That's racist and not very nice."
He said, "Well, if you had lived as long as I have, and have worked beside them, you would know exactly what I'm talking about. I've owned several businesses and hired them, but they would never come in and when they did, they sat around and did nothing."
I said, "I have several African American friends, I attend UT with several of them as well, and those that I know are all very responsible. I'm sure that you have dealt with lazy black people, but there are lazy people of all racists, and you shouldn't lump all African Americans into one "lazy" category.
At this point, after speaking to my grandfather this way, I felt like I was going to throw up. As I mentioned before, you just DON'T say these things to him. He's always right and everyone in the family acknowledges that he is. He then said, "You are 20 years old and have no clue what you're talking about. If you DID know what you were talking about, you wouldn't have even brought up this conversation. End of discussion."
So, I shut up.
Should I be proud of myself for saying anything? Should I have kept going? Should I have just shut up, not said anything and let a 78 year old man who doesn't have much longer have his way, as usual.
My birthday was yesterday and he gave me a very nice gift. He's a great grandfather, has helped my mother and father out tremendously during financial hardships, opens up his home anytime we'd like to come to Florida, and is an overall great person. But, he hurt my feelings by telling me that I didn't know anything, and I'm not sure how to handle this situation.
He's the type of grandfather that is very sweet, but can make you cry with just a look. He's very stern, very strict, and is ALWAYS right. He could say that the sky is green and everyone in our family agrees with him because they're don't want to start an argument. He's a bully, he's that relative that you're afraid of as a kid, and even as an adult.
He has made racist comments for years, and while my family isn't exactly fighting beside Dr. King and probably tells a racist joke here and there, we are not racists and think it's appalling to judge someone based on their race. It makes everyone uncomfortable when he says these things, but because he's grandpa (like I mentioned earlier), no one says a word.
Tonight, my mother, my grandfather, and me were watching the news together. Tiger Woods was being shown and my grandpa says, "I don't watch much TV with black people on it. They're all very lazy."
And finally, with butterflies in my stomach (or more like flying saucers), I said, "Grandpa, you shouldn't say that. That's racist and not very nice."
He said, "Well, if you had lived as long as I have, and have worked beside them, you would know exactly what I'm talking about. I've owned several businesses and hired them, but they would never come in and when they did, they sat around and did nothing."
I said, "I have several African American friends, I attend UT with several of them as well, and those that I know are all very responsible. I'm sure that you have dealt with lazy black people, but there are lazy people of all racists, and you shouldn't lump all African Americans into one "lazy" category.
At this point, after speaking to my grandfather this way, I felt like I was going to throw up. As I mentioned before, you just DON'T say these things to him. He's always right and everyone in the family acknowledges that he is. He then said, "You are 20 years old and have no clue what you're talking about. If you DID know what you were talking about, you wouldn't have even brought up this conversation. End of discussion."
So, I shut up.
Should I be proud of myself for saying anything? Should I have kept going? Should I have just shut up, not said anything and let a 78 year old man who doesn't have much longer have his way, as usual.
My birthday was yesterday and he gave me a very nice gift. He's a great grandfather, has helped my mother and father out tremendously during financial hardships, opens up his home anytime we'd like to come to Florida, and is an overall great person. But, he hurt my feelings by telling me that I didn't know anything, and I'm not sure how to handle this situation.
