Five years ago I weighed about 16 and a half stone (231 lbs), and was at my fattest ever at that time. I didn't keep fit either and was beginning to look rather 'out of condition'. It got to a point where I knew I needed to do something and this is when I began swimming regularly. My weight stabilised around 16 stone and I although was happy at that weight I chose to go on a diet to lose more weight in order to try for a baby.
But when I look at old photos from that time I don't appear any bigger than I am today. For one, I had much bigger breasts back then. I had a fat tummy which when relaxed would protrude slightly further forward than my boobs but I could 'suck it in' and appear instantly slimmer for photos. My tummy used to be tight and round, without the flabby belly hang that I have now. :blush:
I was 14 stone 9 lbs (205 lbs) when I became pregnant. Nothing could have prepared me for feeling so hungry during the pregnancy, plus I had no morning sickness. I put on all of the weight that I had lost and weighed over 18 stone at 40 weeks (250+ lbs).
The next bit is very sad. I'm not looking for sympathy but need to explain why I couldn't breastfeed etc. We lost our precious baby at 41 weeks and he was stillborn a few days later.
This was almost 3 years ago. My weight plummeted mostly due to grief but I was also seriously ill with acute pancreatitis and admitted back into hospital just 6 weeks after I'd given birth. I totally lost my appetite for food.
Sometimes it feels like a long time ago, other times like yesterday. Overall, I am coping much better in general. Still get some bad days. A year ago I had an early miscarriage and comfort ate initially but then found my old appetite for food (and life - the miscarriage gave me the hope that I could become pregnant again) and let my weight creep all the way back to 16 stone! I'm down 7 lbs from this now.
I'm amazed how much my body shape has changed. I never expected my breasts to shrink - particularly as I didn't breastfeed (took tablets to prevent my breastmilk from coming in). I knew I'd end up with some belly hang (genetic trait) but never imagined how much fatter my belly would be. I have blouses which fit before but no longer button up over my belly! It's as if the weight loss from my breasts has gone straight to my belly. I'm not unhappy with my new shape anymore than I was with my old shape. It's just different.
On the positive side, when something terribly bad happens to you it really puts a perspective on what is important in life. I'm happier with my body now than I've ever been in my life. I enjoy being fat - it makes me feel sexy and feminine. I no longer suck in my tummy for photos (haha it's pointless even trying it still looks big). My profile pic is of me actually sitting down! In the past I'd have avoided that pose or tried to hide my big belly with my rucksack. Perhaps this is why I don't look so fat in my old photos?
Most importantly of all, I had the courage to finally 'come out' to my husband and tell him exactly how I felt about my body.
Sorry for such a long post!
But when I look at old photos from that time I don't appear any bigger than I am today. For one, I had much bigger breasts back then. I had a fat tummy which when relaxed would protrude slightly further forward than my boobs but I could 'suck it in' and appear instantly slimmer for photos. My tummy used to be tight and round, without the flabby belly hang that I have now. :blush:
I was 14 stone 9 lbs (205 lbs) when I became pregnant. Nothing could have prepared me for feeling so hungry during the pregnancy, plus I had no morning sickness. I put on all of the weight that I had lost and weighed over 18 stone at 40 weeks (250+ lbs).
The next bit is very sad. I'm not looking for sympathy but need to explain why I couldn't breastfeed etc. We lost our precious baby at 41 weeks and he was stillborn a few days later.
Sometimes it feels like a long time ago, other times like yesterday. Overall, I am coping much better in general. Still get some bad days. A year ago I had an early miscarriage and comfort ate initially but then found my old appetite for food (and life - the miscarriage gave me the hope that I could become pregnant again) and let my weight creep all the way back to 16 stone! I'm down 7 lbs from this now.
I'm amazed how much my body shape has changed. I never expected my breasts to shrink - particularly as I didn't breastfeed (took tablets to prevent my breastmilk from coming in). I knew I'd end up with some belly hang (genetic trait) but never imagined how much fatter my belly would be. I have blouses which fit before but no longer button up over my belly! It's as if the weight loss from my breasts has gone straight to my belly. I'm not unhappy with my new shape anymore than I was with my old shape. It's just different.
On the positive side, when something terribly bad happens to you it really puts a perspective on what is important in life. I'm happier with my body now than I've ever been in my life. I enjoy being fat - it makes me feel sexy and feminine. I no longer suck in my tummy for photos (haha it's pointless even trying it still looks big
). My profile pic is of me actually sitting down! In the past I'd have avoided that pose or tried to hide my big belly with my rucksack. Perhaps this is why I don't look so fat in my old photos? Most importantly of all, I had the courage to finally 'come out' to my husband and tell him exactly how I felt about my body.
Sorry for such a long post!
