Hello Dims,
Long time no talk (formerly "patmcf"). Hope everyone is doing well enough amidst Covid-19! Tough times.
Please forgive me, as I bet this post has been made a 1000 times, but I could really use a sympathetic perspective.
My fiancé and I have been together for almost two years. I would classify her as a BBW who is positively beautiful inside and out. She really is the whole package: smart, funny, and caring. I am lucky to have her.
While she knows I love her body in its current state, I have never told her the extent of it. I have been been an FA my entire life, having dated enough to realize that my sexual attraction is to a certain size of woman. Honestly, I have read everything academic on the subject, scoured the internet, listened to every podcast I could find, and even starting talking to a sex therapist. My research and life experience has taught me that this is not a preference, but a sexual identity that is hard wired in my brain.
All of this to say, I think I have screwed up by not having an explicit talk with my wife about what I am "into."
Ethically speaking, while she seems quite comfortable at her size, I do not know that for sure. Maybe she secretly hates her size and is about to marry a man who admires fat?
Love is about accepting the person for who they are; consequently, I understand that my love for her cannot and will not be dependent on her size. Still, I feel that this sexual part of myself is hidden from her and she deserves to know about it.
Thoughts? Suggestions for talking to her about it?
Please be gentle
Thank you
Long time no talk (formerly "patmcf"). Hope everyone is doing well enough amidst Covid-19! Tough times.
Please forgive me, as I bet this post has been made a 1000 times, but I could really use a sympathetic perspective.
My fiancé and I have been together for almost two years. I would classify her as a BBW who is positively beautiful inside and out. She really is the whole package: smart, funny, and caring. I am lucky to have her.
While she knows I love her body in its current state, I have never told her the extent of it. I have been been an FA my entire life, having dated enough to realize that my sexual attraction is to a certain size of woman. Honestly, I have read everything academic on the subject, scoured the internet, listened to every podcast I could find, and even starting talking to a sex therapist. My research and life experience has taught me that this is not a preference, but a sexual identity that is hard wired in my brain.
All of this to say, I think I have screwed up by not having an explicit talk with my wife about what I am "into."
Ethically speaking, while she seems quite comfortable at her size, I do not know that for sure. Maybe she secretly hates her size and is about to marry a man who admires fat?
Love is about accepting the person for who they are; consequently, I understand that my love for her cannot and will not be dependent on her size. Still, I feel that this sexual part of myself is hidden from her and she deserves to know about it.
Thoughts? Suggestions for talking to her about it?
Please be gentle
Thank you
