So maybe this has been done before and maybe this isn't the right board for this thread, but if it isn't, I'm sure someone will move it....
So I'll start with a brief background story/thought....
Over the past year, I've gone from from around 375 to about 290. I don't have a goal in mind, but I just made some changes in my life that led to me losing weight that I had put on when I was stressed and unhappy. But's that's a long story and a different board.
But as I lost weigh, I was bombarded with comments along the lines of "How much weight have you lost?" "How are you losing weight?" "What's your secret?" "You've lost a lot of weight, you look great" and all sorts of things in a similar vein. And so I got to thinking: Outside of this environment (and our community), when was the last time that someone said something complimentary about you GAINING weight? Or even being large? Or fat? (Pregnancy doesn't count, ladies)
So I further wondered: What is the nicest and the most hurtful (meanest) thing someone has ever said about your size/weight?
For me, I think that the nicest thing anyone ever said about my size or weight was a girl I dated for a while. She said that I had a sexy jiggly belly. Other than that, compliments tended to the backhanded, such as "Well, you don't LOOK 375" or "You carry it well (I'm 6' 6".....I carry just about EVERYTHING well!)"
As for the most hurtful thing anyone ever said about my size or weight, I had to think about that for a while. I mean, many of us have been the victims of schoolyard taunts (fatty, wide load, lard ass and a host of others) and subject to behind the back (and sometimes open) mocking, pointing and snickering. And many of us have had negative experiences with medical professionals who have brough a less than caring attitude to the table, ignoring their professional responsibilty to "First do no harm" (at least in my opinion)....
But honestly, the most hurtful things were said to me by those closest to me: my parents and my sister, who would try and push me into losing weight. They'd say things like "Do you want to be this fat your whole life?" "What are you going to do if you're this fat when you're older?" "We don't want to have to take care of you because you're not able to take care of yourself" and the like. Yet when I tried to point out to them that those things, rather than being encouraging, were hurtful and mean, they never seemed to understand that, because they were always "doing it for my own good" and "didn't mean to mean" as if that somehow made it ok to cast my feelings on the matter aside.
Feel free to fire back,
Bob
So I'll start with a brief background story/thought....
Over the past year, I've gone from from around 375 to about 290. I don't have a goal in mind, but I just made some changes in my life that led to me losing weight that I had put on when I was stressed and unhappy. But's that's a long story and a different board.
But as I lost weigh, I was bombarded with comments along the lines of "How much weight have you lost?" "How are you losing weight?" "What's your secret?" "You've lost a lot of weight, you look great" and all sorts of things in a similar vein. And so I got to thinking: Outside of this environment (and our community), when was the last time that someone said something complimentary about you GAINING weight? Or even being large? Or fat? (Pregnancy doesn't count, ladies)
So I further wondered: What is the nicest and the most hurtful (meanest) thing someone has ever said about your size/weight?
For me, I think that the nicest thing anyone ever said about my size or weight was a girl I dated for a while. She said that I had a sexy jiggly belly. Other than that, compliments tended to the backhanded, such as "Well, you don't LOOK 375" or "You carry it well (I'm 6' 6".....I carry just about EVERYTHING well!)"
As for the most hurtful thing anyone ever said about my size or weight, I had to think about that for a while. I mean, many of us have been the victims of schoolyard taunts (fatty, wide load, lard ass and a host of others) and subject to behind the back (and sometimes open) mocking, pointing and snickering. And many of us have had negative experiences with medical professionals who have brough a less than caring attitude to the table, ignoring their professional responsibilty to "First do no harm" (at least in my opinion)....
But honestly, the most hurtful things were said to me by those closest to me: my parents and my sister, who would try and push me into losing weight. They'd say things like "Do you want to be this fat your whole life?" "What are you going to do if you're this fat when you're older?" "We don't want to have to take care of you because you're not able to take care of yourself" and the like. Yet when I tried to point out to them that those things, rather than being encouraging, were hurtful and mean, they never seemed to understand that, because they were always "doing it for my own good" and "didn't mean to mean" as if that somehow made it ok to cast my feelings on the matter aside.
Feel free to fire back,
Bob
