Ok, so I was thinking…what are we all really looking for? If you could build the perfect mate…what would the most important qualities be to you? Everyone has very different needs. So I’m curious to know what would make the perfect mate for you. What would the most important things be and what couldn’t you live without? What would be icing on the cake for you? Do you prefer BBW or SSBBW or BHM? Are you looking for a feeder or a feedee? Do they need to be established or can they be a starving artist? How important is family to you? What if your family didn’t care for that person? How would that affect your decision about your potential relationship? How does a person’s sexual past experience factor in for you or doesn’t it? Can you handle a long distance relationship? I understand most all of my preferences are fairly general but feel free to mention any other preference you might have. You never know if the person you have been looking for all your life is right under your nose…or not.
I understand these are all very personal questions and even if you are already in a relationship the person you are with now may not even meet all of your ideal standards but sometimes we cannot find the perfect mate with all the qualities we ever thought we wanted but they are the perfect mate for you.
Ok, so one of the first things that comes to mind for me is preferring someone who wants to send time with me but doesn’t require that it be every single day. Like once a week is even fine with me. Talking on the phone a few times a week is fine too. It should however be someone who does miss me when I’m not around, but also gives me the right amount of space without being too distant. Basically I would want someone to be a part of my life but not spend every waking moment with…at least not in the beginning.
Someone who knows and understands that sometimes I just get a little scared and need to take a step back and catch my breath; and that they know it’s not about me second guessing them but needing some space for myself.
Someone who is on a similar level intellectually. I don’t consider myself to be a brainiac by any means but it becomes very apparent after a while when someone is not your level. It might be cute in the beginning but when someone is constantly confused often times I end up feeling a little frustrated and alone when we can’t discuss certain things without getting our signals crossed.
Someone who wants to build a mutual trust and understands that it doesn’t happen overnight. Someone who is patient and confident and truly believes that sticking it out will pay off for the both of us. Someone who really would want to try and realize that even if it didn’t work out that it was worth a shot.
Someone who wants to be there for you when things are going well and when they aren’t.
Someone who knows how to take a step back from a heated situation or argument and see that there is really something else going on when it seems that I am just very angry, sad or scared before things go too far and we both say things we don’t mean. Someone who knows when and is able to forgive and let it go and not let it tear us apart.
Someone who doesn’t need me to be 500 or 100lbs but likes me just the way I am, would accept me either way and that we currently have a strong mutual physical attraction. I’ve thought in the past that if everything else came together that maybe you could grow to love or be attracted to someone but from experience I now know that is just not true. The chemistry must be there. I always thought I was more attracted to brown hair/brown eyes but I always seem to end up with the lighter…I guess it is not a strong preference for me…one of the very least important factors.
Someone who isn’t afraid to tell you what they need and communicate inside and outside of the bedroom.
Someone who is not perpetually on the lookout for a better opportunity but is satisfied to be where they are and with whom they are right now. If you’re not happy…get out. I am not an insurance policy that you can cash in on if nothing better comes along. Sorry to sound so harsh but if you are that motivated enough to be out there looking for someone better then our relationship is probably just not the right one for you.
Someone who is not afraid to stand up and say this is what I like and it means more to me to have you in my life than my fear of other people judging me or thinking less of me because of my preference.
Someone who doesn’t need you in their lives to fill some void…but wants you in their lives because you make it better and add value and compliment each other. Someone who does not suck the life out of you with one crisis after another …someone with a continual handful of problems and never any solutions. I understand that some people like to be the hero and enjoy stepping in and rescuing the other person from distress and actually thrive on it but…I am just not one of those people.
Someone who you can see yourself laughing and crying with.
I understand these are all very personal questions and even if you are already in a relationship the person you are with now may not even meet all of your ideal standards but sometimes we cannot find the perfect mate with all the qualities we ever thought we wanted but they are the perfect mate for you.
Ok, so one of the first things that comes to mind for me is preferring someone who wants to send time with me but doesn’t require that it be every single day. Like once a week is even fine with me. Talking on the phone a few times a week is fine too. It should however be someone who does miss me when I’m not around, but also gives me the right amount of space without being too distant. Basically I would want someone to be a part of my life but not spend every waking moment with…at least not in the beginning.
Someone who knows and understands that sometimes I just get a little scared and need to take a step back and catch my breath; and that they know it’s not about me second guessing them but needing some space for myself.
Someone who is on a similar level intellectually. I don’t consider myself to be a brainiac by any means but it becomes very apparent after a while when someone is not your level. It might be cute in the beginning but when someone is constantly confused often times I end up feeling a little frustrated and alone when we can’t discuss certain things without getting our signals crossed.
Someone who wants to build a mutual trust and understands that it doesn’t happen overnight. Someone who is patient and confident and truly believes that sticking it out will pay off for the both of us. Someone who really would want to try and realize that even if it didn’t work out that it was worth a shot.
Someone who wants to be there for you when things are going well and when they aren’t.
Someone who knows how to take a step back from a heated situation or argument and see that there is really something else going on when it seems that I am just very angry, sad or scared before things go too far and we both say things we don’t mean. Someone who knows when and is able to forgive and let it go and not let it tear us apart.
Someone who doesn’t need me to be 500 or 100lbs but likes me just the way I am, would accept me either way and that we currently have a strong mutual physical attraction. I’ve thought in the past that if everything else came together that maybe you could grow to love or be attracted to someone but from experience I now know that is just not true. The chemistry must be there. I always thought I was more attracted to brown hair/brown eyes but I always seem to end up with the lighter…I guess it is not a strong preference for me…one of the very least important factors.
Someone who isn’t afraid to tell you what they need and communicate inside and outside of the bedroom.
Someone who is not perpetually on the lookout for a better opportunity but is satisfied to be where they are and with whom they are right now. If you’re not happy…get out. I am not an insurance policy that you can cash in on if nothing better comes along. Sorry to sound so harsh but if you are that motivated enough to be out there looking for someone better then our relationship is probably just not the right one for you.
Someone who is not afraid to stand up and say this is what I like and it means more to me to have you in my life than my fear of other people judging me or thinking less of me because of my preference.
Someone who doesn’t need you in their lives to fill some void…but wants you in their lives because you make it better and add value and compliment each other. Someone who does not suck the life out of you with one crisis after another …someone with a continual handful of problems and never any solutions. I understand that some people like to be the hero and enjoy stepping in and rescuing the other person from distress and actually thrive on it but…I am just not one of those people.
Someone who you can see yourself laughing and crying with.
