PeanutButterfly
Well-Known Member
I've been rewatching Drop Dead Diva for some time now on netflix (if anyone here hasn't seen it, you totally should. Brooke Elliot is great) and an episode got me thinking. Jane (Brooke Elliot) is a size 16 lawyer who meets a love interest in court. Her mom makes a comment about men who "prefer full figured women" and how great it is to find someone like that. Jane is stunned and obviously disturbed by a guy who would find her attractive at the size she is, despite the fact that the show emphasizes a size acceptance attitude, dealing with issues like stores not selling dresses in more than a size 10. As a member of this community, this seems like a contradiction to me.
My question is this: why are some women so disturbed by the idea of a guy finding them beautiful at an above average size? Is it because of the fetish angle? Is it because they want to change? I'm assuming the writers of the show didn't intend that one for Jane because she spends much of the show proving that at a size 16 she's successful, beautiful, and smart.
I've seen this happen in real life too. One of my great friends has a boyfriend who I'd bet money on that he's an FA. Yet when I tried to open her up to the community because she's always putting herself down about her size she acted similarly to Jane. She was obviously upset and disturbed by the idea of her boyfriend liking her body at a size 14. I just never understood why she would want to be with a guy who wished she was a size 2.
As a disclaimer I can't relate to this concept because I am also an FA and have been frequenting Dims since I was about 12. And I prefer to date FAs. Obviously some guys are bisizual but most I've encountered do have a preference. If I knew my boyfriend only like African American women I would feel inadequate knowing I'm not his preference. I'm just curious why other BBWs would want to be with a guy they knew wished they were thinner.
My question is this: why are some women so disturbed by the idea of a guy finding them beautiful at an above average size? Is it because of the fetish angle? Is it because they want to change? I'm assuming the writers of the show didn't intend that one for Jane because she spends much of the show proving that at a size 16 she's successful, beautiful, and smart.
I've seen this happen in real life too. One of my great friends has a boyfriend who I'd bet money on that he's an FA. Yet when I tried to open her up to the community because she's always putting herself down about her size she acted similarly to Jane. She was obviously upset and disturbed by the idea of her boyfriend liking her body at a size 14. I just never understood why she would want to be with a guy who wished she was a size 2.
As a disclaimer I can't relate to this concept because I am also an FA and have been frequenting Dims since I was about 12. And I prefer to date FAs. Obviously some guys are bisizual but most I've encountered do have a preference. If I knew my boyfriend only like African American women I would feel inadequate knowing I'm not his preference. I'm just curious why other BBWs would want to be with a guy they knew wished they were thinner.
