~BBW, ~~WG, Intrigue, Sci-Fi - A daring expedition to a forbidden planet proves both delicious and dangerous
Note: Sometimes you sit down to write your next silly Midwestern horror story and a space opera falls out instead. Oh well. Also, feel free to substitute the subtitle with your favorite sci-fi related foodie-puns.
Chapter 1
Starling made his way down to starships lower deck, humming to himself. Exploratory Vessel Triptolemus was a large ship, but the interior was crowded and navigable only by cramped, narrow corridors. Descending from the bridge to the cryo-stasis chamber, Starling had to climb down ladders, slip through several hatches, and crawl along the ventral access tube. Fortunately, he was fairly nimble for an android and moved through the ship with ease.
Emerging into the narrow corridor that served as the main deck, he passed by several sealed hatches; on normal voyages they would have led to private quarters, the galley, recreation rooms, and the like. On this voyage, though, the ship had instead been outfitted with landing pods, field labs for research in a variety of scientific domains, planetary rovers, a modular habitat, and small-scale terraforming equipment. A separate gangway lead to the immense, empty cargo pod attached to the ships belly.
Starling eventually reached the aft stasis chamber and peered at the vessels five passengers. They slept frozen in a ring of cryo-tubes, calm music playing overhead.
The android took a minute to check all their vitals and update the log. He smiled at their peaceful expressions and initiated the thawing procedure.
The first to step out of her pod was a slender, long-limbed blonde woman, the expeditions commander and planetary cartographer. After her rose the astro-chemist, then the cosmo-geologist, the xeno-biologist, and finally the terraforming engineer.
They all stumbled from their pods, blinking in the light, naked and shivering.
I was having the loveliest dreams, sighed the chemist. Angels were feeding me the most lavish meal Id ever seen, day after day.
Two years in stasis and all you dreamed about was food? the engineer chided him, powering up her bionic arm.
Food is our mission, he reminded her. It seems contrary, my friends, to decry the attention to food while on a galaxy-spanning search for it.
The geologist opened a nearby bulkhead and began passing around towels. I wont decry anything that tastes better than the rations back home.
Too right, the commander agreed. I like the sound of your dream, mate. Wouldnt mind waking up to a feast every morning myself, aye? She reached her arms overhead and arched her back, stretching her wiry form enough to touch the low ceiling.
Your waistband might mind, cautioned the chemist.
The biologist shook out her mane of red hair. You say that like it would be a bad thing.
Just so, he replied, raising his finger. We must always remember the importance of moderation. I saw my dream not as a desire for overindulgencestars forbidbut as an omen of success.
The commander cleared her throat. Speaking of which Starling, I hope youve woken us for some good news.
Indeed, commander, the android chimed. I am pleased to report that we have arrived at our destination and are entering geosynchronous orbit above exoplanet LV-237.
They caught their collective breath, staring at him.
Hows it look? asked the commander.
Starling beamed. White clouds. Blue surface. Green landmasses. It awaits your analyses, dear friends, but thus far it matches the admiraltys preliminary projections.
A wave of relieved delight passed over the crew. They clapped each other on the back, shouting and whistling.
Okay, everyone, get dressed, said the commander, toweling off her svelte body. Weve got work to do.
They dispersed and hurriedly gathered their things. After theyd tugged on their color-coded jumpsuits, Starling served them each a small portion of post-stasis sustenance and installed their portable bio-paks. The crew chattered about the planets prospects, unanimously thrilled about tasting actual food again and leaving behind their colonies tasteless, soulless ration bars.
Moderation, the engineer scoffed to the chemist. The colonies have been starving for almost two decades now. I see food, Im eating it.
The chemist shook his head. It was a lack of moderation that created the starvation.
It was a lack of fair distribution, the commander corrected. But hopefully thats all in the past now as long as this planet lives up to the hype.
Eventually Starling led them up to the bridge. The planet loomed on the viewscreen, its atmosphere thick with cloud. It lit up their awed faces as they manned their consoles and booted up the ships scanning equipment.
Beautiful, whispered the biologist, licking her lips.
Its one of the most Earth-like planets Ive ever seen, remarked the geologist, eyes darting over the cascades of data on her screen. I mean, assuming the historical accounts are accurate. Similar geological age, similar tectonic structure interconnected oceans and sizable landmasses of wow, highly, highly variable terrain.
Atmosphere? asked the commander.
The chemist arched his eyebrows. Nitrogen oxygen carbon dioxide. Its basically Terran. There are trace elements, but it should definitely be breathable.
So, capable of supporting life?
Och, that would be an understatement, the biologist whispered, gaping at her readouts. Im registering massive amounts of organic compounds life almost looks ubiquitous.
Inhabited?
Well by plants, at least. Im not reading any real animate activity. But its brimming with the basics of life, just waiting.
A garden world, the geologist whispered.
They stared at the planet for a while longer.
Well, we came here looking for a fresh start, the engineer murmured after a few minutes. Doesnt get any fresher.
The commander pulled her hair back. So youd say it looks viable for agriculture?
The biologist glanced at the others, then nodded solemnly. Its hard to see any specifics through those clouds, and we wont know anything for sure until we go down there, but yeah. She looked up at the viewscreen. I think were looking at a planet full of food.
Hot damn, said the geologist. If only they could see this back home. Thatd give them some hope, mm.
Were going to be heroes. This wouldnt just end scarcity the colonies might never be hungry again.
The commander smiled. Maybe searching the heavens for manna wasnt as foolhardy as they all told us.
The chemist wiped at his eyes. Its perfect, he murmured. A paradise.
Note: Sometimes you sit down to write your next silly Midwestern horror story and a space opera falls out instead. Oh well. Also, feel free to substitute the subtitle with your favorite sci-fi related foodie-puns.
Planet XL
Gourmands of the Galaxy: Volume One
by Marlow
Gourmands of the Galaxy: Volume One
by Marlow
Chapter 1
Starling made his way down to starships lower deck, humming to himself. Exploratory Vessel Triptolemus was a large ship, but the interior was crowded and navigable only by cramped, narrow corridors. Descending from the bridge to the cryo-stasis chamber, Starling had to climb down ladders, slip through several hatches, and crawl along the ventral access tube. Fortunately, he was fairly nimble for an android and moved through the ship with ease.
Emerging into the narrow corridor that served as the main deck, he passed by several sealed hatches; on normal voyages they would have led to private quarters, the galley, recreation rooms, and the like. On this voyage, though, the ship had instead been outfitted with landing pods, field labs for research in a variety of scientific domains, planetary rovers, a modular habitat, and small-scale terraforming equipment. A separate gangway lead to the immense, empty cargo pod attached to the ships belly.
Starling eventually reached the aft stasis chamber and peered at the vessels five passengers. They slept frozen in a ring of cryo-tubes, calm music playing overhead.
The android took a minute to check all their vitals and update the log. He smiled at their peaceful expressions and initiated the thawing procedure.
The first to step out of her pod was a slender, long-limbed blonde woman, the expeditions commander and planetary cartographer. After her rose the astro-chemist, then the cosmo-geologist, the xeno-biologist, and finally the terraforming engineer.
They all stumbled from their pods, blinking in the light, naked and shivering.
I was having the loveliest dreams, sighed the chemist. Angels were feeding me the most lavish meal Id ever seen, day after day.
Two years in stasis and all you dreamed about was food? the engineer chided him, powering up her bionic arm.
Food is our mission, he reminded her. It seems contrary, my friends, to decry the attention to food while on a galaxy-spanning search for it.
The geologist opened a nearby bulkhead and began passing around towels. I wont decry anything that tastes better than the rations back home.
Too right, the commander agreed. I like the sound of your dream, mate. Wouldnt mind waking up to a feast every morning myself, aye? She reached her arms overhead and arched her back, stretching her wiry form enough to touch the low ceiling.
Your waistband might mind, cautioned the chemist.
The biologist shook out her mane of red hair. You say that like it would be a bad thing.
Just so, he replied, raising his finger. We must always remember the importance of moderation. I saw my dream not as a desire for overindulgencestars forbidbut as an omen of success.
The commander cleared her throat. Speaking of which Starling, I hope youve woken us for some good news.
Indeed, commander, the android chimed. I am pleased to report that we have arrived at our destination and are entering geosynchronous orbit above exoplanet LV-237.
They caught their collective breath, staring at him.
Hows it look? asked the commander.
Starling beamed. White clouds. Blue surface. Green landmasses. It awaits your analyses, dear friends, but thus far it matches the admiraltys preliminary projections.
A wave of relieved delight passed over the crew. They clapped each other on the back, shouting and whistling.
Okay, everyone, get dressed, said the commander, toweling off her svelte body. Weve got work to do.
They dispersed and hurriedly gathered their things. After theyd tugged on their color-coded jumpsuits, Starling served them each a small portion of post-stasis sustenance and installed their portable bio-paks. The crew chattered about the planets prospects, unanimously thrilled about tasting actual food again and leaving behind their colonies tasteless, soulless ration bars.
Moderation, the engineer scoffed to the chemist. The colonies have been starving for almost two decades now. I see food, Im eating it.
The chemist shook his head. It was a lack of moderation that created the starvation.
It was a lack of fair distribution, the commander corrected. But hopefully thats all in the past now as long as this planet lives up to the hype.
Eventually Starling led them up to the bridge. The planet loomed on the viewscreen, its atmosphere thick with cloud. It lit up their awed faces as they manned their consoles and booted up the ships scanning equipment.
Beautiful, whispered the biologist, licking her lips.
Its one of the most Earth-like planets Ive ever seen, remarked the geologist, eyes darting over the cascades of data on her screen. I mean, assuming the historical accounts are accurate. Similar geological age, similar tectonic structure interconnected oceans and sizable landmasses of wow, highly, highly variable terrain.
Atmosphere? asked the commander.
The chemist arched his eyebrows. Nitrogen oxygen carbon dioxide. Its basically Terran. There are trace elements, but it should definitely be breathable.
So, capable of supporting life?
Och, that would be an understatement, the biologist whispered, gaping at her readouts. Im registering massive amounts of organic compounds life almost looks ubiquitous.
Inhabited?
Well by plants, at least. Im not reading any real animate activity. But its brimming with the basics of life, just waiting.
A garden world, the geologist whispered.
They stared at the planet for a while longer.
Well, we came here looking for a fresh start, the engineer murmured after a few minutes. Doesnt get any fresher.
The commander pulled her hair back. So youd say it looks viable for agriculture?
The biologist glanced at the others, then nodded solemnly. Its hard to see any specifics through those clouds, and we wont know anything for sure until we go down there, but yeah. She looked up at the viewscreen. I think were looking at a planet full of food.
Hot damn, said the geologist. If only they could see this back home. Thatd give them some hope, mm.
Were going to be heroes. This wouldnt just end scarcity the colonies might never be hungry again.
The commander smiled. Maybe searching the heavens for manna wasnt as foolhardy as they all told us.
The chemist wiped at his eyes. Its perfect, he murmured. A paradise.
