I tried to talk about this in Hyde Park but that place is like a DMZ, so here goes here.
I've been thinking a lot about fat acceptance, and how a majority of the "movement' is tied up in sexual attraction. Perhaps I have that impression because I get most, if not all, of my acceptance interaction here at Dims, and Conrad has stated before that one of his goals here was interaction between FA and BBW.
Anyway, an admirer in a thread in Hyde Park referred to his complimenting a BBW as "activism." This bothers me in a couple of ways. I am all for fat admirers complimenting the objects of their desire. That said, I don't see that as activism. We talk a lot on the forums about attraction, about how fat women want admirers to be uncloseted, and proud to be with them. I think it's a very real thing, that in a lot of ways we don't understand each other, and have things to work out. I guess I just don't think that acting on your own desires for a fat partner makes you an activist. You aren't doing any favors to fat people when you compliment them, date them, whatever. You are doing that because that's what you want, and if you are true to yourself you will go out and get what you want, and not what society tells you you should want.
I've had strangers in chat tell me "I'd date you." What am I supposed to say to that? Thank you? That's so generous of you? Most of the time I really want to say "What in the hell makes you think I'd date YOU?"
But activism? I wonder how many here think about how fat people earn less money, get slighted by health care professionals, have problems even in actually fitting in to society...as much as they do sexual attraction between fat admirers and the fat? It seems kind of like preaching to the choir, and I don't know how much it impacts society as a whole in terms of advancing acceptance for fat people.
I'm all for flirting. I'm all for silly "fluff" posts. I make them myself...I adore humor. I love the OT posts on the boards that let me get to know another side of my fellow posters...it fosters a wonderful sense of community. I also know that I don't do enough personally in terms of activism.
It just seems sad and wrong to me that "You've got a great ass!" has come to be viewed as activism.
I'm not sure I've explained myself very well, but I just wanted to spark a discussion, so I guess it doesn't really matter how eloquent I've been. So...any thoughts?
I've been thinking a lot about fat acceptance, and how a majority of the "movement' is tied up in sexual attraction. Perhaps I have that impression because I get most, if not all, of my acceptance interaction here at Dims, and Conrad has stated before that one of his goals here was interaction between FA and BBW.
Anyway, an admirer in a thread in Hyde Park referred to his complimenting a BBW as "activism." This bothers me in a couple of ways. I am all for fat admirers complimenting the objects of their desire. That said, I don't see that as activism. We talk a lot on the forums about attraction, about how fat women want admirers to be uncloseted, and proud to be with them. I think it's a very real thing, that in a lot of ways we don't understand each other, and have things to work out. I guess I just don't think that acting on your own desires for a fat partner makes you an activist. You aren't doing any favors to fat people when you compliment them, date them, whatever. You are doing that because that's what you want, and if you are true to yourself you will go out and get what you want, and not what society tells you you should want.
I've had strangers in chat tell me "I'd date you." What am I supposed to say to that? Thank you? That's so generous of you? Most of the time I really want to say "What in the hell makes you think I'd date YOU?"
But activism? I wonder how many here think about how fat people earn less money, get slighted by health care professionals, have problems even in actually fitting in to society...as much as they do sexual attraction between fat admirers and the fat? It seems kind of like preaching to the choir, and I don't know how much it impacts society as a whole in terms of advancing acceptance for fat people.
I'm all for flirting. I'm all for silly "fluff" posts. I make them myself...I adore humor. I love the OT posts on the boards that let me get to know another side of my fellow posters...it fosters a wonderful sense of community. I also know that I don't do enough personally in terms of activism.
It just seems sad and wrong to me that "You've got a great ass!" has come to be viewed as activism.
I'm not sure I've explained myself very well, but I just wanted to spark a discussion, so I guess it doesn't really matter how eloquent I've been.
So...any thoughts?
