flippedover
Well-Known Member
Hi,
I know I haven't actually taken the trouble yet of introducing myself on the boards but that's more of an unconscious oversight than anything else...I've drifted on and off the boards for something like the past 8 or 9 years and recently decided to start posting and/or reading them more often.
Anyway, I had my first date this morning/afternoon with a BHM I met about a week ago and it got me thinking (on the tram ride home) about the other big guys I've dated.
Firstly, I was wondering how many of the BHMs on the board would say they actually liked being fat or even actively tried gaining weight as opposed to just accepting themselves or being secure about who they are. Most of the BHMs I have gone out with (and indeed a substantial proportion of more slender or athletic men too) are- to varying degrees- quite insecure about their looks and their bodies in particular. Yet, on the other hand, a lot of these guys get very excited when you make it clear you find their extra weight attractive and draw attention to it by rubbing their bellies etc. I guess it just got me wondering to what degree BHMs- and particularly gainers- experience shame about their sexual preferences/desire to be large(r). Do you think a lot of BHMs feel conflicted about enjoying their weight and succumbing to the pressure to be- or desire to be- thin? Or is it more a question of just accepting oneself or not? I know it would be a sweeping generalization to pigeonhole all BHMs into one category or the other but I'm just curious to know what everyone thinks.
Secondly, I quite liked this guy I dated today and definitely had fun but found him, at least towards the end of the date, at little bit over-eager and (potentially) kind of clingy. I'm conflicted about going on a second date. Should I be open-minded and defer my judgment or look for someone less insecure about himself? I've met so many great BHMs- sweet, intelligent, wonderful guys-but I just wish I could meet more who felt and acted like they deserved to go out with me. That they were equal to me and that I wasn't doing them a great favor just by being attracted to them-because I'm not, I am attracted to them! Very much so. Sure I'm looking for "inner beauty" but some cushion for the pushin' wouldn't hurt either!
Anyway, that's my beef. I'd be curious to know what you all think about anything I've written...
Cheers.
I know I haven't actually taken the trouble yet of introducing myself on the boards but that's more of an unconscious oversight than anything else...I've drifted on and off the boards for something like the past 8 or 9 years and recently decided to start posting and/or reading them more often.
Anyway, I had my first date this morning/afternoon with a BHM I met about a week ago and it got me thinking (on the tram ride home) about the other big guys I've dated.
Firstly, I was wondering how many of the BHMs on the board would say they actually liked being fat or even actively tried gaining weight as opposed to just accepting themselves or being secure about who they are. Most of the BHMs I have gone out with (and indeed a substantial proportion of more slender or athletic men too) are- to varying degrees- quite insecure about their looks and their bodies in particular. Yet, on the other hand, a lot of these guys get very excited when you make it clear you find their extra weight attractive and draw attention to it by rubbing their bellies etc. I guess it just got me wondering to what degree BHMs- and particularly gainers- experience shame about their sexual preferences/desire to be large(r). Do you think a lot of BHMs feel conflicted about enjoying their weight and succumbing to the pressure to be- or desire to be- thin? Or is it more a question of just accepting oneself or not? I know it would be a sweeping generalization to pigeonhole all BHMs into one category or the other but I'm just curious to know what everyone thinks.
Secondly, I quite liked this guy I dated today and definitely had fun but found him, at least towards the end of the date, at little bit over-eager and (potentially) kind of clingy. I'm conflicted about going on a second date. Should I be open-minded and defer my judgment or look for someone less insecure about himself? I've met so many great BHMs- sweet, intelligent, wonderful guys-but I just wish I could meet more who felt and acted like they deserved to go out with me. That they were equal to me and that I wasn't doing them a great favor just by being attracted to them-because I'm not, I am attracted to them! Very much so. Sure I'm looking for "inner beauty" but some cushion for the pushin' wouldn't hurt either!
Anyway, that's my beef. I'd be curious to know what you all think about anything I've written...
Cheers.
